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1
00:00:01,535 --> 00:00:03,502
Miss, I'm done here.
2
00:00:03,504 --> 00:00:04,770
Oh, I've been done here for years.
3
00:00:04,772 --> 00:00:06,939
You don't see me getting a parade.
4
00:00:09,677 --> 00:00:11,910
Oh, looks like we lost electricity.
5
00:00:11,912 --> 00:00:16,715
Uh-oh, all the food in the
refrigerator will go worse.
6
00:00:16,717 --> 00:00:18,617
Is it a bad sign that
7
00:00:18,619 --> 00:00:22,054
I can actually see everything better?
8
00:00:22,056 --> 00:00:25,824
Well, we finally found lighting
that made the food look edible.
9
00:00:25,826 --> 00:00:27,626
Yeah,
it's almost dark enough for Caroline
10
00:00:27,628 --> 00:00:30,062
to agree to have sex in here.
11
00:00:30,064 --> 00:00:34,033
Max, have you ever seen balls in light?
12
00:00:35,236 --> 00:00:37,736
They're not pretty.
13
00:00:37,738 --> 00:00:40,506
Nobody panic!
14
00:00:40,508 --> 00:00:42,307
The power is out in the whole building.
15
00:00:42,309 --> 00:00:47,179
We've got less energy
than a Steely Dan concert.
16
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:49,014
Han, you look exactly like
17
00:00:49,016 --> 00:00:52,251
a Doozer from "Fraggle Rock" right now.
18
00:00:52,253 --> 00:00:54,386
All right,
we've got to keep the diner safe
19
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:56,355
from hooligans and looters.
20
00:00:56,357 --> 00:00:58,257
You're still on the clock!
21
00:00:58,259 --> 00:01:01,560
And you're on my foot.
22
00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:04,930
Sorry, Earl,
I can't see you in the dark...
23
00:01:06,801 --> 00:01:09,768
But not in a racist way.
24
00:01:09,770 --> 00:01:12,438
And I can't see you in the light
25
00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:14,506
in a short way.
26
00:01:14,508 --> 00:01:17,009
Han, who would loot this diner?
27
00:01:17,011 --> 00:01:20,813
Unless they're looters looking
specifically for disappointment.
28
00:01:25,352 --> 00:01:26,685
Max?
29
00:01:26,687 --> 00:01:28,887
Just taking this vodka
30
00:01:28,889 --> 00:01:31,090
and cash register to a safe place.
31
00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:48,774
Our new dessert bar
is under construction
32
00:01:48,776 --> 00:01:49,975
and it's not quite there yet.
33
00:01:49,977 --> 00:01:51,410
Kind of like the credit card bill
34
00:01:51,412 --> 00:01:53,278
I lied about mailing,
35
00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:57,116
but I've chosen you two to be
the first to get a preview.
36
00:01:57,118 --> 00:01:59,651
She invited other people.
They said, "No."
37
00:01:59,653 --> 00:02:02,921
She told me there would
be some hard candy.
38
00:02:02,923 --> 00:02:06,125
Better be some hard candy.
39
00:02:06,127 --> 00:02:08,427
I have peppermints inside.
40
00:02:08,429 --> 00:02:10,929
Then we're fine.
41
00:02:14,268 --> 00:02:17,102
So it doesn't look like much now,
42
00:02:17,104 --> 00:02:19,905
but with a little moxie
and a lot of work,
43
00:02:19,907 --> 00:02:21,507
it's gonna be gorgeous.
44
00:02:21,509 --> 00:02:23,842
Like Khlo� Kardashian.
45
00:02:23,844 --> 00:02:27,179
Is that the one that's a dude now?
46
00:02:29,850 --> 00:02:33,385
Okay, where's my treat?
47
00:02:34,455 --> 00:02:35,654
Impressive,
48
00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:37,589
and you've stolen almost nothing
49
00:02:37,591 --> 00:02:39,725
from the diner to do this.
50
00:02:39,727 --> 00:02:44,796
Oh, wait, I see my sport coat
is being used as a paint rag.
51
00:02:44,798 --> 00:02:47,199
That coat's yours?
52
00:02:47,201 --> 00:02:50,636
I thought it belonged
to a service Chihuahua.
53
00:02:51,972 --> 00:02:55,040
Hey, everybody.
54
00:02:56,977 --> 00:02:59,945
Oh, yeah.
55
00:02:59,947 --> 00:03:02,414
Hubba, hubba, hot stuff.
56
00:03:02,416 --> 00:03:04,149
You know, if I were still single,
57
00:03:04,151 --> 00:03:07,319
I'd let you spackle my hole.
58
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:10,556
You heard what she said, beefcake.
59
00:03:10,558 --> 00:03:11,924
I'm not gay.
60
00:03:11,926 --> 00:03:14,826
I'm just very pro-harassment.
61
00:03:14,828 --> 00:03:16,662
I'm proud of you, girls.
62
00:03:16,664 --> 00:03:18,664
You're making your dreams come true,
63
00:03:18,666 --> 00:03:21,633
and my dreams, too,
assuming you'll allow me
64
00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:22,834
to start a tab here.
65
00:03:22,836 --> 00:03:25,504
I'll never pay.
66
00:03:25,506 --> 00:03:28,073
Does this mean you're not
paying your tab at the diner?
67
00:03:28,075 --> 00:03:30,876
Uh-huh.
68
00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:32,077
Earl?
69
00:03:32,079 --> 00:03:34,313
He walks fast when he wants to.
70
00:03:35,783 --> 00:03:37,216
I gotta get going too.
71
00:03:37,218 --> 00:03:38,984
You know,
we just came from the baby doctor,
72
00:03:38,986 --> 00:03:40,719
and he put me on bed rest.
73
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:44,790
At first I thought the doctor said,
"Bed arrest,'
74
00:03:44,792 --> 00:03:47,559
which is one of my favorite games.
75
00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:49,995
Sophie, what's wrong? Are you okay?
76
00:03:49,997 --> 00:03:52,264
Well, I'm five months along,
77
00:03:52,266 --> 00:03:54,366
and the baby already weighs 15 pounds,
78
00:03:54,368 --> 00:03:57,369
so the doctor's just a little worried.
79
00:03:57,371 --> 00:03:59,404
He's afraid it'll fall out
80
00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:02,708
like a watermelon through
a plastic grocery bag.
81
00:04:03,911 --> 00:04:05,744
Come on, baby, let's get you in bed
82
00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:07,145
and get your legs up.
83
00:04:07,147 --> 00:04:08,981
I can't believe none of
this has to do with sex.
84
00:04:08,983 --> 00:04:10,382
Yeah.
85
00:04:11,819 --> 00:04:13,018
Knock, knock. It's Randy.
86
00:04:13,020 --> 00:04:14,486
I got a six-pack...
87
00:04:15,856 --> 00:04:18,323
And I brought some beers.
88
00:04:18,325 --> 00:04:21,059
Who wants some warm, wet, deli beer?
89
00:04:21,061 --> 00:04:23,462
This is why you're the
best boyfriend ever.
90
00:04:23,464 --> 00:04:25,631
Warm,
wet deli beer is the official drink
91
00:04:25,633 --> 00:04:28,166
of my personality.
92
00:04:28,168 --> 00:04:29,935
So, Randy, look.
93
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:32,271
What do you think of the new bar space?
94
00:04:32,273 --> 00:04:34,172
I've got a bar-related question.
95
00:04:34,174 --> 00:04:36,108
How you gonna fit in the bar?
96
00:04:36,110 --> 00:04:38,610
It's all right here on the blueprints,
see?
97
00:04:38,612 --> 00:04:40,746
The bar goes here,
so that leaves ten feet
98
00:04:40,748 --> 00:04:43,015
for the cafe tables and
the front door entrance.
99
00:04:43,017 --> 00:04:45,517
Uh, you see this number ten right here?
100
00:04:45,519 --> 00:04:50,155
You see the two dashes after it?
Those are inches, not feet.
101
00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:54,426
You got 10 inches.
102
00:04:54,428 --> 00:04:58,263
First time I've ever been
disappointed with 10 inches.
103
00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:02,634
Well,
that's the last time I get an architect
104
00:05:02,636 --> 00:05:06,305
from the "casual encounters"
section of Craigslist.
105
00:05:06,307 --> 00:05:07,939
Ugh.
106
00:05:07,941 --> 00:05:10,942
The lady from the pizza place
next door is banging back again.
107
00:05:10,944 --> 00:05:13,812
Yeah, they should pay less
attention to our business
108
00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,414
and more attention to their own.
109
00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:17,249
There's so much oil on their pizza,
110
00:05:17,251 --> 00:05:19,151
the U.S. might invade it.
111
00:05:19,153 --> 00:05:20,352
You know what?
112
00:05:20,354 --> 00:05:21,753
I think we've just
113
00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:23,055
blown past "warm beers."
114
00:05:23,057 --> 00:05:24,556
I'm gonna go get us some whiskey.
115
00:05:24,558 --> 00:05:27,326
10 inches always looks a
whole lot bigger with bourbon.
116
00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:31,763
Oh, my God, Max, we need more space.
117
00:05:31,765 --> 00:05:35,000
I know;
we spend way too much time together.
118
00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:36,368
Hey!
119
00:05:36,370 --> 00:05:40,505
Enough with the noise, cupcake bitches.
120
00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:44,543
You gotta stop with this freakin'
racket already.
121
00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:47,412
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down, Gina.
122
00:05:47,414 --> 00:05:49,748
What, 'cause I'm Italian,
123
00:05:49,750 --> 00:05:52,184
my name's gotta be Gina?
124
00:05:52,186 --> 00:05:55,954
It's Angie. Gina's my middle name.
125
00:05:55,956 --> 00:05:59,591
Oh, I thought your middle name was
"bangs a lot."
126
00:06:00,828 --> 00:06:02,794
Angie, we're expanding our shop,
127
00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:04,763
and we have a permit
for the construction,
128
00:06:04,765 --> 00:06:06,298
so it's above board.
129
00:06:06,300 --> 00:06:08,700
Which, yes, even I'm surprised about.
130
00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:11,370
You got a permit to destroy my business?
131
00:06:11,372 --> 00:06:14,539
Nobody wants to eat pizza
132
00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:18,043
next to this constant freaking racket.
133
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:21,546
What's your freaking point?
134
00:06:21,548 --> 00:06:23,749
Max, I didn't know you spoke Italian.
135
00:06:25,185 --> 00:06:26,485
Follow me.
136
00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:28,954
I want yous to see the
hell you're making.
137
00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:30,856
Um, that's a firm pass.
138
00:06:30,858 --> 00:06:32,758
- I'll throw in a free slice.
- Okay.
139
00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:43,268
See?
140
00:06:43,270 --> 00:06:44,569
See what you're doing to our office
141
00:06:44,571 --> 00:06:46,471
from all that banging next door?
142
00:06:46,473 --> 00:06:48,273
You're destroying it.
143
00:06:48,275 --> 00:06:50,275
Uh, look, you can't destroy a room
144
00:06:50,277 --> 00:06:53,745
that has this strong of a
"hostage basement" vibe.
145
00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:56,915
You got cracks, and falling plaster,
146
00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:58,417
and my brother and I are fed up.
147
00:06:58,419 --> 00:07:00,152
Right, Angelo?
148
00:07:00,154 --> 00:07:02,053
He says, "Right."
149
00:07:02,055 --> 00:07:03,922
He's my twin.
150
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:06,358
We agree with our minds.
151
00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:09,594
Um, Angie,
when do we get that free slice?
152
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:11,663
Not to be pushy, but a deal is a deal,
153
00:07:11,665 --> 00:07:13,932
and today's a carb day for me.
154
00:07:16,804 --> 00:07:18,437
What the frig?
155
00:07:18,439 --> 00:07:22,040
I just got my hair cut for
our high school reunion.
156
00:07:22,042 --> 00:07:23,475
Now it's ruined.
157
00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:28,547
It's a frickin' war zone in here!
158
00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:31,049
My father would be turning in his grave
159
00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:34,486
if we'd been able to
give him a proper burial.
160
00:07:34,488 --> 00:07:36,087
How you gonna make this right?
161
00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:38,423
Look, Angie and Angelo,
162
00:07:38,425 --> 00:07:40,459
we're sorry about the inconvenience,
163
00:07:40,461 --> 00:07:42,394
but it'll just be another
week of construction.
164
00:07:42,396 --> 00:07:44,729
We promise to keep the
noise down to a minimum.
165
00:07:44,731 --> 00:07:46,465
Right, Max?
166
00:07:46,467 --> 00:07:48,667
She's agreeing with her mind.
167
00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:51,937
Hey, just came by to see
if everything's okay,
168
00:07:51,939 --> 00:07:54,506
and to say I've never
seen the statue of David
169
00:07:54,508 --> 00:07:57,209
with a slice of pizza over his junk.
170
00:07:57,211 --> 00:08:00,412
Who's this hunk of gabbagoul?
171
00:08:00,414 --> 00:08:02,781
This hunk is Randy, and he's my...
172
00:08:02,783 --> 00:08:06,485
Lawyer, and I'm sure he's here
to make sure there's no problem.
173
00:08:06,487 --> 00:08:07,953
There's not problem, right, Angie?
174
00:08:07,955 --> 00:08:11,723
The only problem I see
now is that shirt on him.
175
00:08:14,795 --> 00:08:16,862
Hi, I'm Angie,
176
00:08:16,864 --> 00:08:21,266
but I'm thinking about
changing my name to yours.
177
00:08:21,268 --> 00:08:24,169
Props, that's a good line.
178
00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:27,272
So, Angie, what do you think?
179
00:08:27,274 --> 00:08:29,241
Can you stand another
week of the construction?
180
00:08:29,243 --> 00:08:32,244
All right.
181
00:08:32,246 --> 00:08:34,012
I'll give yous two another week,
182
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:35,780
'cause of Randy here,
183
00:08:35,782 --> 00:08:38,350
but that's the last thing
I ever do for you two.
184
00:08:38,352 --> 00:08:42,120
You, I'd do whatever you want..
185
00:08:42,122 --> 00:08:46,124
tonight and in perpetuity.
186
00:08:46,126 --> 00:08:47,659
"Perpetuity"?
187
00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:51,563
Better not be Italian for "the butt."
188
00:08:58,739 --> 00:09:00,138
Guys,
189
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:03,608
I have a genius idea to fix
the dessert bar problem.
190
00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:06,678
What if somehow we could convince Angie
191
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:10,048
to let us break through the wall
and rent out their back office?
192
00:09:12,286 --> 00:09:13,652
Come on!
193
00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:16,621
This is a genius idea.
194
00:09:16,623 --> 00:09:19,457
Their business is struggling,
195
00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:21,960
and we could pay them rent.
196
00:09:21,962 --> 00:09:23,628
It's either that or we have to use
197
00:09:23,630 --> 00:09:26,097
dollhouse furniture for the dessert bar.
198
00:09:26,099 --> 00:09:27,299
You know what? She's right.
199
00:09:27,301 --> 00:09:28,900
It is a good idea.
200
00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:31,570
You just gotta figure out a way
to get on Angie's good side.
201
00:09:31,572 --> 00:09:34,739
Maybe you bring her a
bouquet of cigarettes.
202
00:09:34,741 --> 00:09:38,043
Okay, Caroline, the only thing
Angie likes about us is him,
203
00:09:38,045 --> 00:09:40,879
and honestly,
the only thing I like about us is him.
204
00:09:40,881 --> 00:09:43,148
That's perfect;
we should bring Randy over there
205
00:09:43,150 --> 00:09:44,516
when we go ask her.
206
00:09:44,518 --> 00:09:47,118
Randy, this has got to work,
207
00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:48,486
so wear a tight shirt,
208
00:09:48,488 --> 00:09:50,789
and maybe put a little
Parmesan behind your ears.
209
00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:58,029
Uh.
210
00:09:58,031 --> 00:10:01,533
So, Angelo, any idea when
your sister is getting back?
211
00:10:04,338 --> 00:10:07,939
Well, it is a long commute from hell.
212
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:10,475
Oh...
213
00:10:10,477 --> 00:10:11,876
Hi, Randy.
214
00:10:11,878 --> 00:10:15,513
I would make out with you,
but I just got a manicure,
215
00:10:15,515 --> 00:10:18,550
and I like to use my nails.
216
00:10:19,386 --> 00:10:21,953
Next time.
217
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:24,556
So we came here with a
business proposition,
218
00:10:24,558 --> 00:10:26,691
and some delicious cupcakes.
219
00:10:26,693 --> 00:10:28,159
I'll need the plate back.
220
00:10:28,161 --> 00:10:30,462
Get those away from me!
221
00:10:30,464 --> 00:10:33,031
I'm going to my reunion
in a dress so tight
222
00:10:33,033 --> 00:10:35,166
you could see the kidney Angelo gave me
223
00:10:35,168 --> 00:10:39,437
from when I had renal failure
from drinking too much Tab.
224
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:43,942
First of all, Angie,
Max and I are so glad
225
00:10:43,944 --> 00:10:46,978
to hear that you pulled
through from the renal failure,
226
00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:49,948
but the real reason we're here is...
227
00:10:49,950 --> 00:10:52,517
did you see Randy?
228
00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:53,718
Look, let's move this along.
229
00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:54,953
We want to bust through this wall
230
00:10:54,955 --> 00:10:56,588
and rent your little pizza hut here.
231
00:10:56,590 --> 00:10:57,789
Well, I'm in charge,
232
00:10:57,791 --> 00:10:59,357
and I'm not renting to yous two.
233
00:10:59,359 --> 00:11:00,892
I don't have time for this.
234
00:11:00,894 --> 00:11:03,328
I still don't have a date
for my reunion tomorrow,
235
00:11:03,330 --> 00:11:05,030
and this stress is bad for my face.
236
00:11:05,032 --> 00:11:08,566
I already have more filler
than a two-hour "Dateline."
237
00:11:11,238 --> 00:11:13,571
Angie, how does a woman like you
238
00:11:13,573 --> 00:11:15,774
not have a date for your reunion?
239
00:11:15,776 --> 00:11:17,776
I mean, not to be too forward,
240
00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:20,211
but hot magenta really
brings out your eyes.
241
00:11:20,213 --> 00:11:23,314
Well, you're not wrong.
242
00:11:23,316 --> 00:11:26,017
You know what would be wrong?
243
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:28,486
If Randy didn't take you
244
00:11:28,488 --> 00:11:31,222
to your reunion tomorrow night.
245
00:11:31,224 --> 00:11:34,459
Do you want to be punched in
the face with my ring hand?
246
00:11:34,461 --> 00:11:36,094
You know what?
247
00:11:36,096 --> 00:11:37,929
That...
248
00:11:37,931 --> 00:11:40,432
is a great idea.
249
00:11:40,434 --> 00:11:44,035
Angie, I would be honored to
take your to your reunion.
250
00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:45,370
Oh, my God!
251
00:11:45,372 --> 00:11:48,006
Really?
252
00:11:48,008 --> 00:11:50,842
What about Angelo?
What's he supposed to do?
253
00:11:50,844 --> 00:11:55,613
Angelo, do you want to bring
one of these two to the reunion?
254
00:11:55,615 --> 00:11:58,483
They're not my type.
255
00:11:58,485 --> 00:12:00,885
Two fives make a ten, right?
256
00:12:06,193 --> 00:12:08,059
Oleg!
257
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:10,228
I know we don't really
have standards here,
258
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:14,599
but the customer said that
her steak shouldn't do this.
259
00:12:16,670 --> 00:12:21,272
Well, tell her not to turn
the plate upside down then.
260
00:12:21,274 --> 00:12:23,007
I'm FaceTiming with Sophie.
261
00:12:23,009 --> 00:12:24,209
She's lonely.
262
00:12:24,211 --> 00:12:27,112
Say "hi" to Caroline.
263
00:12:27,114 --> 00:12:29,948
I'm not that lonely.
264
00:12:29,950 --> 00:12:33,318
Ugh, I just scrubbed a table.
265
00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:34,819
That is how upset I am.
266
00:12:34,821 --> 00:12:37,522
I should have never let
Randy go to that reunion.
267
00:12:37,524 --> 00:12:39,424
And I should have never
268
00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:42,761
let Buddy Holly get on that plane,
269
00:12:42,763 --> 00:12:44,095
but what're you gonna do?
270
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:47,499
Other than play it over and over again
271
00:12:47,501 --> 00:12:50,168
in your mind for 60 years.
272
00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:52,070
Max, it'll all be worth it
273
00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:54,105
when we get that extra
space for our dessert bar.
274
00:12:54,107 --> 00:12:56,741
Why would God make Randy look like that
275
00:12:56,743 --> 00:12:59,210
if not to help us get stuff?
276
00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:00,812
I'm worried about Randy.
277
00:13:00,814 --> 00:13:02,647
He is strong, but she has the strength
278
00:13:02,649 --> 00:13:04,616
of ten horny women.
279
00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:07,085
Somebody talk to me.
280
00:13:07,087 --> 00:13:09,187
I'm dying here.
281
00:13:09,189 --> 00:13:12,590
I just watched all eight seasons of
"Perfect Strangers."
282
00:13:12,592 --> 00:13:15,927
I'm...I'm just...I'm... I'm Balki'd out.
283
00:13:16,997 --> 00:13:19,898
I just felt a shift in the force.
284
00:13:19,900 --> 00:13:22,634
Did somebody clean a table over there?
285
00:13:22,636 --> 00:13:23,902
Is everything okay?
286
00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:25,904
She's upset because Angie
287
00:13:25,906 --> 00:13:28,006
from the pizza parlor
next door needed a date
288
00:13:28,008 --> 00:13:30,441
to her high school reunion,
and Randy took her.
289
00:13:30,443 --> 00:13:32,510
Well, that's hurtful.
290
00:13:32,512 --> 00:13:34,579
I've asked Angie out twice.
291
00:13:34,581 --> 00:13:37,582
They're not on a real date, Han.
292
00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:39,450
He's just trying to convince her
293
00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:40,885
to let us rent their back office.
294
00:13:40,887 --> 00:13:42,954
Randy's wasting his time.
295
00:13:42,956 --> 00:13:45,590
It's actually Angie's
delightful brother Angelo
296
00:13:45,592 --> 00:13:47,091
who controls the lease.
297
00:13:47,093 --> 00:13:49,494
Angelo's in charge?
298
00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:52,197
Angelo's "delightful"?
299
00:13:52,199 --> 00:13:55,366
Ugh, I am so bored
300
00:13:55,368 --> 00:13:59,637
that I just got a degree
from DeVry University.
301
00:14:00,774 --> 00:14:04,042
So she tricked Randy
302
00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:05,710
into going to that reunion with her?
303
00:14:05,712 --> 00:14:07,779
I am going to the high school
304
00:14:07,781 --> 00:14:09,514
to get my man back... oh, my God,
305
00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:11,516
I sound just like my mother.
306
00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:13,852
We should go there and sweet-talk Angelo
307
00:14:13,854 --> 00:14:15,386
into giving us the space.
308
00:14:15,388 --> 00:14:17,822
Oh, but we're "not his type,"
309
00:14:17,824 --> 00:14:19,791
which is a shame,
because I really wanted some of
310
00:14:19,793 --> 00:14:22,894
that 50-year-old
video-game-addict money.
311
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:25,296
Well,
where are we gonna get tacky dresses
312
00:14:25,298 --> 00:14:27,131
and hair from 1986?
313
00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:30,835
I can make you look like it's 1986
314
00:14:30,837 --> 00:14:34,939
'cause I lived in Poland in 2003!
315
00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:55,894
How you doin'?
316
00:14:55,896 --> 00:14:58,263
Oh, Jimmy Vecchio!
317
00:14:58,265 --> 00:15:01,499
It's Max...Blackilini.
318
00:15:01,501 --> 00:15:03,635
Doesn't ring a bell.
319
00:15:03,637 --> 00:15:04,836
What about me?
320
00:15:04,838 --> 00:15:06,237
It's Caroline...
321
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:09,007
uh, Cacciatore!
322
00:15:09,009 --> 00:15:12,911
Didn't we take math together
with Mr. Bag-a-two-shoes?
323
00:15:12,913 --> 00:15:14,646
Never heard of him.
324
00:15:14,648 --> 00:15:17,415
Eh!
- Forget about it.
325
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:20,451
Oh, there's Angelo
326
00:15:20,453 --> 00:15:21,819
dancing by himself.
327
00:15:21,821 --> 00:15:23,955
No surprise there.
328
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:27,191
Wow, I've never seen a sweat-suit tux.
329
00:15:28,395 --> 00:15:29,594
Angelo.
330
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:31,462
It's Max and Caroline
331
00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:32,797
from next door.
332
00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:34,399
Um, you probably don't recognize us.
333
00:15:34,401 --> 00:15:36,501
I'm hoping no one does.
334
00:15:36,503 --> 00:15:38,369
What? I can't hear you
335
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:40,405
with the babe alarm going off.
336
00:15:40,407 --> 00:15:43,541
Whee-ooh, whee-ooh.
337
00:15:43,543 --> 00:15:47,378
Oh, well, same to you.
338
00:15:47,380 --> 00:15:49,781
What is that, terry cloth?
339
00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:52,150
Actually, we came here to talk to you
340
00:15:52,152 --> 00:15:53,451
because we wanted to ask you
341
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:55,119
about renting out your back office.
342
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:56,921
We know you're the big cheese.
343
00:15:56,923 --> 00:15:58,957
You know, since you're here,
344
00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:00,558
maybe we, uh, cut a rug?
345
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:04,996
She hasn't cut her rug in
about four months, so...
346
00:16:07,467 --> 00:16:10,101
We could, uh,
start off on the dance floor,
347
00:16:10,103 --> 00:16:12,136
and if we happen to end up
348
00:16:12,138 --> 00:16:15,340
in the back of an '86 Cutlass Supreme,
349
00:16:15,342 --> 00:16:17,809
so be it.
350
00:16:17,811 --> 00:16:20,812
So be it. Forget about it.
351
00:16:20,814 --> 00:16:22,080
Excuse us.
352
00:16:22,082 --> 00:16:24,649
Max, I am not a whore.
353
00:16:24,651 --> 00:16:28,219
That's not what your hair,
dress, and makeup say.
354
00:16:28,221 --> 00:16:31,422
Look, you pimped Randy
out for that extra space,
355
00:16:31,424 --> 00:16:32,724
and now it's your turn.
356
00:16:32,726 --> 00:16:34,859
You want that back room, make it happen.
357
00:16:34,861 --> 00:16:37,595
On the count of three,
358
00:16:37,597 --> 00:16:39,797
say "sex."
359
00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:42,700
You handle Angelo.
360
00:16:42,702 --> 00:16:44,235
I've been wanting to kill someone
361
00:16:44,237 --> 00:16:46,971
for using a selfie stick,
and she is the lucky one.
362
00:16:46,973 --> 00:16:50,074
Angie, God rest your soul,
363
00:16:50,076 --> 00:16:52,777
get your hands off my boyfriend.
364
00:16:52,779 --> 00:16:54,912
Max, what're you doing here?
365
00:16:54,914 --> 00:16:57,248
Please tell me that's a wig.
366
00:16:57,250 --> 00:16:59,317
She tricked you into coming here.
367
00:16:59,319 --> 00:17:01,719
She is not in charge of the pizza place.
368
00:17:01,721 --> 00:17:05,490
Her brother is. This is my hair.
369
00:17:05,492 --> 00:17:07,225
Angie, is that true?
370
00:17:07,227 --> 00:17:09,627
Did I do the Electric Slide for nothing?
371
00:17:09,629 --> 00:17:10,995
Well, not for nothing.
372
00:17:10,997 --> 00:17:14,432
We came in second in
the dance competition.
373
00:17:14,434 --> 00:17:16,634
Okay, fine, it's true.
374
00:17:16,636 --> 00:17:18,836
Angelo's in charge.
375
00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:20,805
My father thought he was the smarter one
376
00:17:20,807 --> 00:17:23,408
because he wore glasses as a kid.
377
00:17:23,410 --> 00:17:26,144
Randy, are you okay?
378
00:17:26,146 --> 00:17:29,814
Did the bad lady touch you
in any of the good places?
379
00:17:29,816 --> 00:17:32,216
Look, I'm sorry I lied,
380
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,585
but for what it's worth,
I'm having the night of my life.
381
00:17:34,587 --> 00:17:38,022
Believe it or not,
I wasn't popular in high school.
382
00:17:38,024 --> 00:17:39,857
I didn't date a football player
383
00:17:39,859 --> 00:17:42,560
or get pregnant.
384
00:17:42,562 --> 00:17:45,096
For once,
I just wanted to show up a winner.
385
00:17:45,098 --> 00:17:47,899
- Hey, Ange!
- Oh, no.
386
00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:49,200
Here comes Michelle Pascucci.
387
00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:51,569
Please, don't ruin this for me.
388
00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:54,238
Who's this, Ange?
389
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,474
What's she doing holding
on to your fianc�
390
00:17:56,476 --> 00:17:59,944
like he's the last cannoli at a wake?
391
00:18:01,247 --> 00:18:04,482
Forgot to tell you, I got engaged.
392
00:18:04,484 --> 00:18:05,850
Wait.
393
00:18:05,852 --> 00:18:08,686
Unless that's not really your boyfriend.
394
00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:12,423
'Cause, uh, you're known to lie.
395
00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:14,625
Well...
396
00:18:14,627 --> 00:18:16,627
she's not lying.
397
00:18:16,629 --> 00:18:19,997
He's been cheating on
me with her for years.
398
00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:23,534
I, uh, caught 'em at the Olive Garden.
399
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:27,972
I smell a catfight,
400
00:18:27,974 --> 00:18:30,775
and Drakkar Noir.
401
00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:32,944
Catfight!
402
00:18:32,946 --> 00:18:36,114
Oh, come here, bitch. Oh!
403
00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:38,783
- Just follow my lead.
- Okay, careful.
404
00:18:38,785 --> 00:18:40,618
I spent $65 on my hair.
405
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:43,488
I was hoping not to
touch it till next week.
406
00:18:43,490 --> 00:18:47,291
Don't touch my arm, bitch! Oh!
407
00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:50,094
Oh, I shouldn't touch your arm?
408
00:18:50,096 --> 00:18:53,498
Maybe you shouldn't touch my guy.
409
00:18:55,268 --> 00:18:58,236
Finally, this party's getting good.
410
00:18:58,238 --> 00:19:00,638
Push me back.
411
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,206
Oh!
412
00:19:02,208 --> 00:19:04,175
Did you just push me?
413
00:19:04,177 --> 00:19:07,111
Yeah, I pushed you,
414
00:19:07,113 --> 00:19:10,348
but not as hard as your boyfriend
415
00:19:10,350 --> 00:19:13,551
was pushing me in the back of the car.
416
00:19:13,553 --> 00:19:16,654
Oh, hell no, bitch!
417
00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:18,823
Now... OH!
418
00:19:18,825 --> 00:19:22,793
I told you not to touch my hair!
419
00:19:22,795 --> 00:19:25,029
Oh!
- Oh, my God!
420
00:19:25,031 --> 00:19:27,832
She's got a freakin' knife!
421
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:29,901
All right, I'm out,
422
00:19:29,903 --> 00:19:32,069
but only because...
423
00:19:32,071 --> 00:19:33,971
I'm on parole
424
00:19:33,973 --> 00:19:37,842
for pulling out a woman's
bangs on the F Train.
425
00:19:37,844 --> 00:19:39,977
Let's get out of here, Ange.
426
00:19:39,979 --> 00:19:41,612
Is my hair dented?
427
00:19:41,614 --> 00:19:45,283
I'll fix it, hun.
I got a chopstick in my purse.
428
00:19:48,855 --> 00:19:50,821
Get over here, you sloppy second.
429
00:19:50,823 --> 00:19:52,089
Wow.
430
00:19:52,091 --> 00:19:54,859
I kind of like having
a knight in shining...
431
00:19:54,861 --> 00:19:57,395
what is this, aluminum foil?
432
00:19:57,397 --> 00:20:00,064
Well, it is warming up the
ravioli I put in my bra.
433
00:20:01,768 --> 00:20:03,868
Max, can I have this dance?
434
00:20:08,942 --> 00:20:11,642
So you think you and I would
have dated in high school?
435
00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:14,779
Well, when I was in high school,
you were in your 30s,
436
00:20:14,781 --> 00:20:15,980
so...
437
00:20:15,982 --> 00:20:17,915
yeah, that sounds right.
438
00:20:17,917 --> 00:20:21,619
I just convinced Angelo to
let us rent the back office.
439
00:20:21,621 --> 00:20:24,155
I mean, I may have to be
his date to the Auto Show.
440
00:20:24,157 --> 00:20:26,123
Wear something nice.
441
00:20:26,125 --> 00:20:28,125
Like a silk blouse
442
00:20:28,127 --> 00:20:30,027
or a bikini.
443
00:20:31,231 --> 00:20:33,864
He wants to show me off.
444
00:20:33,866 --> 00:20:37,568
I never went to anything like this.
445
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,070
A reunion or a prom
446
00:20:39,072 --> 00:20:41,005
or a class.
447
00:20:41,007 --> 00:20:42,440
What do you do at these things?
31664
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