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1
00:00:00,133 --> 00:00:02,379
It is so nice to be out of quarantine
2
00:00:02,380 --> 00:00:03,978
and back running this store.
3
00:00:03,979 --> 00:00:06,713
God, I so missed talking
to real people.
4
00:00:06,714 --> 00:00:08,305
You know, sometimes I pretended
5
00:00:08,306 --> 00:00:10,849
that the Nativity
figurines in my garage
6
00:00:10,885 --> 00:00:12,551
were you guys.
7
00:00:12,586 --> 00:00:14,286
You were the baby Jesus.
8
00:00:14,321 --> 00:00:16,587
That's... great. Thank you.
9
00:00:16,846 --> 00:00:17,956
Hey, sorry about that.
10
00:00:17,992 --> 00:00:19,893
I got lost hate-watching
a James Corden clip
11
00:00:19,899 --> 00:00:20,913
at the gas pump.
12
00:00:20,947 --> 00:00:21,955
Ooh, I love him.
13
00:00:21,957 --> 00:00:22,964
He has a British accent,
14
00:00:22,970 --> 00:00:25,230
but you can tell
he's not smarter than you.
15
00:00:25,266 --> 00:00:28,031
Hey, I thought you'd be back
in your blue polo today.
16
00:00:28,128 --> 00:00:29,427
Not that it matters.
17
00:00:29,637 --> 00:00:31,637
What am I doing? I totally spaced.
18
00:00:31,672 --> 00:00:33,139
You know what?
I'll change after the meeting.
19
00:00:33,140 --> 00:00:35,540
Oh, no rush. Okay.
20
00:00:35,743 --> 00:00:38,507
We've got a really exciting
COVID announcement.
21
00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:40,065
Oh, my God, is it over?
22
00:00:40,114 --> 00:00:42,247
I don't know about you guys,
but COVID has been,
23
00:00:42,283 --> 00:00:43,649
like, super annoying for me.
24
00:00:43,690 --> 00:00:45,217
Huh, yeah, now that you mention it,
25
00:00:45,219 --> 00:00:46,952
I'd have to give it a thumbs down.
26
00:00:47,087 --> 00:00:49,721
No, it's that we no
longer have to sanitize
27
00:00:49,757 --> 00:00:51,859
the conveyor belts
after every customer.
28
00:00:51,860 --> 00:00:52,891
Just hourly.
29
00:00:52,927 --> 00:00:54,690
Actually, Dina already told us that.
30
00:00:54,694 --> 00:00:56,811
Yeah, I covered the COVID
protocols yesterday.
31
00:00:56,850 --> 00:00:58,083
Everyone is up to speed.
32
00:00:58,178 --> 00:00:59,998
Okay, how did you even see that email?
33
00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:01,800
'Cause that's for managers only.
34
00:01:01,802 --> 00:01:02,906
They must've left me on the list.
35
00:01:02,912 --> 00:01:03,998
It was probably an oversight.
36
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:05,067
I'll make sure they take me off.
37
00:01:05,068 --> 00:01:07,168
Okay, well, whenever
you get around to it.
38
00:01:07,675 --> 00:01:09,839
Though, you know,
I wouldn't leave it too long.
39
00:01:09,841 --> 00:01:12,994
Maybe you could do it when
you go to change pretty soon.
40
00:01:13,847 --> 00:01:14,847
Hey, Dina,
41
00:01:14,848 --> 00:01:17,282
somebody parked
their Volvo in your spot.
42
00:01:17,318 --> 00:01:20,686
No, Ken, that's my car.
That's the managers spot.
43
00:01:20,721 --> 00:01:22,633
Oh, I thought it looked familiar.
44
00:01:22,676 --> 00:01:24,145
Anyway, Dina, don't worry about it.
45
00:01:24,158 --> 00:01:25,524
They're towing it right now.
46
00:01:25,732 --> 00:01:27,093
They towed my car!?
47
00:01:33,500 --> 00:01:34,666
Hey, guys.
48
00:01:35,081 --> 00:01:36,082
I'm collecting donations.
49
00:01:36,083 --> 00:01:39,672
My vet said my cat, Biscuit,
needs balloon valvuloplasty.
50
00:01:39,941 --> 00:01:41,365
What is that? Like, implants?
51
00:01:41,447 --> 00:01:43,876
No, it's more of a lifesaving thing.
52
00:01:44,164 --> 00:01:46,312
Anyway, we're still 900 short
53
00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:47,881
after the $5 coupon we got
54
00:01:47,928 --> 00:01:49,348
from liking their page on Facebook,
55
00:01:49,383 --> 00:01:51,951
so if anybody wants to chip in...
56
00:01:56,263 --> 00:01:58,224
Aw, I forgot my wallet.
57
00:01:58,614 --> 00:02:00,960
This shape in my pocket is a Clif Bar.
58
00:02:01,548 --> 00:02:02,858
I'm low on cash.
59
00:02:02,859 --> 00:02:05,193
You know, 'cause
everything's digital now.
60
00:02:05,228 --> 00:02:07,262
That's it. Hold the line.
61
00:02:07,497 --> 00:02:08,511
I get it.
62
00:02:08,752 --> 00:02:11,511
I mean, Biscuit is
kinda like a daughter to me,
63
00:02:11,512 --> 00:02:13,651
but I guess putting down your daughter
64
00:02:13,652 --> 00:02:14,844
is just a part of life.
65
00:02:15,162 --> 00:02:17,396
Damn, are you trying
to raise money or win an Oscar?
66
00:02:18,980 --> 00:02:20,580
Sorry, I should've saved that
for a private text.
67
00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:23,128
I'll chip in. Here's 20...
68
00:02:23,424 --> 00:02:25,077
no, 40.
69
00:02:26,367 --> 00:02:28,290
Wow, thank you.
70
00:02:28,516 --> 00:02:30,916
I'd feel guilty too
if I tried to kill that cat.
71
00:02:31,293 --> 00:02:32,626
This isn't about that.
72
00:02:32,654 --> 00:02:33,728
Guys, we're a family,
73
00:02:33,730 --> 00:02:35,561
and we have to be there for each other,
74
00:02:35,563 --> 00:02:37,805
and Sandra would be there for any of us
75
00:02:37,992 --> 00:02:39,759
if we had a gross, sick cat.
76
00:02:39,934 --> 00:02:41,934
I guess that's a valid point
77
00:02:42,350 --> 00:02:43,797
from Carol,
78
00:02:44,452 --> 00:02:47,527
and it looks like I don't have
anything smaller than a 20.
79
00:02:47,635 --> 00:02:49,330
So good.
80
00:02:49,331 --> 00:02:51,692
I mean, Tita Irma has
hella cataracts right now,
81
00:02:51,693 --> 00:02:53,452
but sure, let me spend
my money on this.
82
00:02:53,995 --> 00:02:56,570
Way to get the ball rolling, Carol.
83
00:02:58,139 --> 00:03:00,306
Look, get out of here.
I'll see you tomorrow.
84
00:03:04,018 --> 00:03:05,250
Where's Nia going?
85
00:03:05,252 --> 00:03:06,718
Oh, I'm sending her home.
86
00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:08,325
Food poisoning. Yeah.
87
00:03:08,326 --> 00:03:10,214
Flooding in the attic and the basement.
88
00:03:10,478 --> 00:03:13,446
Okay, but it's the manager's job
89
00:03:13,788 --> 00:03:14,864
to dismiss people.
90
00:03:14,922 --> 00:03:16,722
Oh, Glenn, you're overthinking this.
91
00:03:16,761 --> 00:03:17,995
No, I'm not trying to be the manager.
92
00:03:17,996 --> 00:03:19,876
I just came into the
bathroom, found her yakking,
93
00:03:19,877 --> 00:03:21,234
and so I'm sending her home.
94
00:03:21,509 --> 00:03:23,407
Yeah, but still, it should be me.
95
00:03:23,471 --> 00:03:25,938
Nia, could you come
back here for a minute?
96
00:03:26,314 --> 00:03:27,947
- Yeah, what's up?
- Yeah, sorry.
97
00:03:27,949 --> 00:03:31,384
I just wanna check
a few things before you go.
98
00:03:31,713 --> 00:03:33,517
What kind of symptoms
have you been having?
99
00:03:33,519 --> 00:03:35,015
I've already been
through this with her.
100
00:03:35,163 --> 00:03:37,664
Yeah, I honestly think
I just need to see the doctor.
101
00:03:38,286 --> 00:03:40,218
I'd say you just need
to see the manager.
102
00:03:40,234 --> 00:03:42,842
So, um, have you been feeling feverish?
103
00:03:42,844 --> 00:03:45,211
You know, any chills?
104
00:03:45,993 --> 00:03:47,292
Knuckle stiffness?
105
00:03:47,294 --> 00:03:48,954
- Stiff knuckles?
Which would indicate...
106
00:03:49,197 --> 00:03:50,545
Well, you don't wanna have 'em,
107
00:03:50,546 --> 00:03:51,586
I can tell you that.
108
00:03:51,587 --> 00:03:53,171
My knuckles are fine.
109
00:03:53,431 --> 00:03:56,406
And... and... and
the food that you ate,
110
00:03:56,407 --> 00:04:00,388
was it sort of smelling
funky like a rotting meat
111
00:04:00,389 --> 00:04:01,708
with, like, a skin sorta...
112
00:04:01,709 --> 00:04:03,302
Oh, God!
113
00:04:03,999 --> 00:04:05,185
Oh, um...
114
00:04:06,027 --> 00:04:08,127
Kay, manager's assessment is over.
115
00:04:09,271 --> 00:04:11,918
Uh, you may go home.
116
00:04:12,828 --> 00:04:13,841
Hi there.
117
00:04:14,081 --> 00:04:16,041
I would like to return this.
118
00:04:16,042 --> 00:04:18,176
Yeah, we don't take
people's personal inventions.
119
00:04:18,211 --> 00:04:20,392
Oh, no, it's a dialysis machine.
120
00:04:20,646 --> 00:04:21,792
I don't need it anymore.
121
00:04:21,822 --> 00:04:22,905
My transplant took,
122
00:04:22,906 --> 00:04:24,717
and I'm producing an
obscene amount of urine.
123
00:04:25,070 --> 00:04:26,937
Okay, well, we don't sell those here,
124
00:04:27,038 --> 00:04:29,172
so you're just gonna have to
take it back to wherever you got it.
125
00:04:29,173 --> 00:04:32,799
Well, actually, the new
Cloud 9 policy states
126
00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,118
that any item sold by Zephra
127
00:04:35,119 --> 00:04:36,991
or a Zephra subsidiary
128
00:04:37,228 --> 00:04:39,895
must be accepted as a return.
129
00:04:39,931 --> 00:04:41,531
See that? See?
130
00:04:41,846 --> 00:04:42,846
Uh, okay.
131
00:04:42,854 --> 00:04:45,111
I mean, I'm assuming
that that is what it says.
132
00:04:45,113 --> 00:04:46,874
- Where did you get it?
- Ojai Medical,
133
00:04:46,875 --> 00:04:48,782
which is owned by Malachite Solutions,
134
00:04:49,173 --> 00:04:52,641
whose parent company is... Zephra.
135
00:04:52,677 --> 00:04:55,699
Okay, didn't realize Zephra
was in the medical game.
136
00:04:56,254 --> 00:04:58,788
Also never cared or thought about it.
137
00:04:59,216 --> 00:05:00,637
So let's do this, my man.
138
00:05:01,058 --> 00:05:03,081
On it. Just give me one second here.
139
00:05:05,923 --> 00:05:07,489
Hmm.
140
00:05:07,525 --> 00:05:08,582
Wait.
141
00:05:08,583 --> 00:05:10,159
Why is it... wait.
142
00:05:10,194 --> 00:05:11,360
Oh.
143
00:05:11,395 --> 00:05:13,253
Maybe you need to call on somebody
144
00:05:13,259 --> 00:05:14,635
who's a little more tech savvy.
145
00:05:14,636 --> 00:05:16,265
What? I am tech savvy.
146
00:05:16,300 --> 00:05:17,912
Okay, I have three monitors at home.
147
00:05:17,913 --> 00:05:19,999
I haven't minimized a
window in four years.
148
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:21,437
Okay, why don't you just go
149
00:05:21,472 --> 00:05:22,993
browse around the
store for a little bit?
150
00:05:22,994 --> 00:05:25,974
Right, yeah, I go browse,
maybe I find a towel I like,
151
00:05:25,975 --> 00:05:28,316
I buy it, then you're laughing
all the way to the bank.
152
00:05:28,445 --> 00:05:30,933
Yes, I benefit greatly
from you buying a towel.
153
00:05:37,922 --> 00:05:40,586
Hey, Cheyenne, if you had a work issue
154
00:05:40,587 --> 00:05:43,376
you needed to resolve,
you'd come see me, right?
155
00:05:43,500 --> 00:05:45,109
Yeah, if I couldn't find Dina.
156
00:05:45,463 --> 00:05:47,529
But I'm the manager!
157
00:05:47,827 --> 00:05:50,446
God, I mean, if Dina's
gonna handle everything,
158
00:05:50,447 --> 00:05:51,715
I don't even know what I'm doing here.
159
00:05:51,716 --> 00:05:52,916
I should go back to my garage.
160
00:05:52,917 --> 00:05:56,144
Aw, no. We totally need you here.
161
00:05:56,145 --> 00:05:58,446
Like, you know, to sign for things
162
00:05:58,447 --> 00:06:01,418
and tell us how much milk used to cost.
163
00:06:02,334 --> 00:06:05,225
Okay, I just wish Dina would
stick to loss prevention.
164
00:06:05,424 --> 00:06:06,619
That is her thing.
165
00:06:06,620 --> 00:06:08,387
Yeah, she's obsessed.
166
00:06:08,422 --> 00:06:10,756
One time she chased a guy
who was stealing a phone,
167
00:06:10,791 --> 00:06:12,758
and he crashed into an endcap,
168
00:06:12,793 --> 00:06:15,761
and his knee, like,
popped through his skin.
169
00:06:15,796 --> 00:06:18,764
Oh, there was, like,
knee goo everywhere.
170
00:06:18,799 --> 00:06:20,703
She was literally glowing.
171
00:06:20,704 --> 00:06:21,867
Yeah, yeah.
172
00:06:21,902 --> 00:06:24,125
She really does love security.
173
00:06:25,274 --> 00:06:27,706
Maybe she just needs a little reminder.
174
00:06:29,567 --> 00:06:30,572
Cheyenne?
175
00:06:31,088 --> 00:06:32,362
Oh, yeah. Sorry.
176
00:06:32,363 --> 00:06:34,665
I was still thinking about
that guy's exploded kneecap.
177
00:06:35,146 --> 00:06:36,494
I'd show you a photo,
178
00:06:36,495 --> 00:06:38,842
but the stupid paramedics were
blocking most of the shots.
179
00:06:41,970 --> 00:06:42,970
Dina?
180
00:06:42,971 --> 00:06:44,720
I just found this in the store.
181
00:06:44,721 --> 00:06:46,621
We need to deal with that immediately.
182
00:06:46,875 --> 00:06:49,391
"This is a threat.
The store is in grave danger."
183
00:06:49,393 --> 00:06:50,404
Grave danger!
184
00:06:50,545 --> 00:06:52,178
That's, like, the worst kind of danger.
185
00:06:52,179 --> 00:06:54,249
You know, we need to beef up security,
186
00:06:54,515 --> 00:06:55,914
get this place on lockdown
187
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:58,082
till we figure out what is going on.
188
00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:00,718
Well, I mean, you do,
'cause you're head of security.
189
00:07:00,769 --> 00:07:01,869
I don't know about this.
190
00:07:01,870 --> 00:07:03,147
I mean, it's a pretty short message,
191
00:07:03,148 --> 00:07:04,899
and there aren't even any demands.
192
00:07:05,180 --> 00:07:07,280
Huh. Maybe they were in a rush.
193
00:07:07,662 --> 00:07:09,703
More to factor in
to your investigation.
194
00:07:10,298 --> 00:07:11,858
Cut out letters from a magazine?
195
00:07:11,859 --> 00:07:13,207
What is this, "Scooby-Doo"?
196
00:07:13,707 --> 00:07:15,307
Nah, I think someone's
just screwing with us.
197
00:07:15,342 --> 00:07:17,525
Probably a kid or, you know, an adult
198
00:07:17,526 --> 00:07:20,106
with a recent traumatic brain injury.
199
00:07:20,107 --> 00:07:22,247
Some dumb-ass spent
a half an hour on that thing.
200
00:07:24,185 --> 00:07:25,707
You didn't have to crumple it.
201
00:07:27,187 --> 00:07:28,451
Hey, guys.
202
00:07:29,034 --> 00:07:30,455
I thought you all should know,
203
00:07:30,491 --> 00:07:33,391
20 minutes ago at 1:37 P.M.,
204
00:07:34,028 --> 00:07:35,661
Biscuit took her last breath.
205
00:07:35,736 --> 00:07:37,703
Aw, damn.
206
00:07:37,898 --> 00:07:39,386
I'm so sorry, Sandra.
207
00:07:39,872 --> 00:07:43,038
We all wish we could just
rip that pain out of your body,
208
00:07:43,074 --> 00:07:44,940
shove up right up inside ourselves,
209
00:07:44,976 --> 00:07:46,251
and claim it as our own.
210
00:07:46,816 --> 00:07:48,477
Yeah.
211
00:07:49,113 --> 00:07:50,798
- Maybe.
- Thanks.
212
00:07:50,821 --> 00:07:52,721
I need to handle some of her affairs,
213
00:07:52,723 --> 00:07:55,639
but I really appreciate
all of your support.
214
00:08:00,892 --> 00:08:03,459
God, that is so sad.
215
00:08:03,533 --> 00:08:05,179
Yep, yep.
216
00:08:05,383 --> 00:08:07,801
Real sad.
217
00:08:08,352 --> 00:08:10,802
So when she says
Biscuit didn't make it,
218
00:08:10,953 --> 00:08:12,414
do we think the cat had the procedure
219
00:08:12,415 --> 00:08:13,563
and didn't survive
220
00:08:13,564 --> 00:08:14,995
or that it died beforehand?
221
00:08:15,306 --> 00:08:16,772
It does seem unlikely
222
00:08:16,807 --> 00:08:19,141
that a procedure would be
scheduled so quickly.
223
00:08:19,176 --> 00:08:22,461
Which means she probably
didn't get a chance
224
00:08:22,462 --> 00:08:24,013
to use the money we all gave her.
225
00:08:24,048 --> 00:08:25,614
Not that that's my focus right now.
226
00:08:25,649 --> 00:08:28,884
- This is bunk, man!
- I want my 40 bucks back.
227
00:08:28,919 --> 00:08:31,186
That's two seasons
of "Ray Donovan" on Blu-ray.
228
00:08:31,222 --> 00:08:32,855
See? This is why they say
229
00:08:32,890 --> 00:08:34,857
never spend money on a coworker's pet.
230
00:08:34,892 --> 00:08:37,396
That's, like, a saying?
231
00:08:38,175 --> 00:08:39,261
What the hell, Bo?
232
00:08:39,296 --> 00:08:41,030
You can't keep having
Titus and Frisco over.
233
00:08:41,065 --> 00:08:42,475
They ruin all our stuff!
234
00:08:42,695 --> 00:08:45,486
Frisco already jacked up
our toilet by flushing a scarf.
235
00:08:45,487 --> 00:08:48,099
Well, that was a different Frisco!
236
00:08:48,587 --> 00:08:49,600
Sorry, Glenn.
237
00:08:49,636 --> 00:08:51,797
Bo's friends are just being lunatics.
238
00:08:51,798 --> 00:08:53,938
I can't help it that my
friends are all wild and stuff.
239
00:08:54,459 --> 00:08:57,160
You know, Bo, if your friends
are really that crazy,
240
00:08:57,195 --> 00:08:59,429
I might have a proposition for them,
241
00:08:59,464 --> 00:09:01,664
but it would need to stay between us.
242
00:09:01,700 --> 00:09:03,133
Yeah, I got you.
243
00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:04,467
Okay, what you got, White Mamba?
244
00:09:04,503 --> 00:09:06,369
Well, I was just wondering, you know,
245
00:09:06,404 --> 00:09:08,705
if maybe they'd be up
for a little mischief.
246
00:09:08,740 --> 00:09:10,974
You know, being a little naughty.
247
00:09:11,009 --> 00:09:13,114
Yo, not to be rude or anything,
248
00:09:13,115 --> 00:09:16,146
but I don't think my boys would
be down to bang some old dude.
249
00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:17,347
- What!?
- Okay, I don't know.
250
00:09:17,382 --> 00:09:19,649
Maybe if the price is right.
I don't know. I'll ask 'em.
251
00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:20,717
What? No, chill, Bo.
252
00:09:20,752 --> 00:09:22,603
This isn't a sex thing.
253
00:09:23,382 --> 00:09:24,922
- I don't think.
- It isn't.
254
00:09:24,923 --> 00:09:26,027
No, we're...
255
00:09:26,028 --> 00:09:28,238
We're checking store security
256
00:09:28,279 --> 00:09:30,579
for weaknesses so we can improve.
257
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:33,329
You know, and I just thought
maybe your friends could
258
00:09:33,365 --> 00:09:35,970
come around and see
what they can get away with.
259
00:09:36,341 --> 00:09:37,558
Yeah, okay. I feel you.
260
00:09:37,876 --> 00:09:39,807
We got you on this, all right?
I'll hit 'em up.
261
00:09:40,081 --> 00:09:41,108
Okay, great.
262
00:09:41,161 --> 00:09:42,272
But to be clear,
263
00:09:42,307 --> 00:09:45,175
I am not interested
in having sex with anyone
264
00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:47,027
other than my wife, Jerusha.
265
00:09:47,919 --> 00:09:50,264
You want me to put that out there too?
266
00:09:51,094 --> 00:09:53,361
No, I get that that's the code
267
00:09:53,410 --> 00:09:55,452
for the dialysis machine
in Zephra's system,
268
00:09:55,453 --> 00:09:58,139
but on Cloud 9's computer,
it only comes up as grapes.
269
00:09:59,257 --> 00:10:01,357
- Who cares what kind of grapes?
- Hey.
270
00:10:01,393 --> 00:10:03,526
Did you know that
Megan Fox hates salmon?
271
00:10:03,562 --> 00:10:04,686
Shh.
272
00:10:04,736 --> 00:10:06,469
Look, I already talked to logistics.
273
00:10:06,698 --> 00:10:08,798
Okay, well, maybe they
miraculously came up
274
00:10:08,833 --> 00:10:10,860
with an answer to my question
since 20 minutes ago.
275
00:10:11,728 --> 00:10:14,155
Oh, they're finally replacing
you with a robot, huh?
276
00:10:14,156 --> 00:10:15,587
Very funny.
277
00:10:15,588 --> 00:10:16,888
No, I've just been spending all morning
278
00:10:16,889 --> 00:10:18,970
trying to help this dude return
an entire medical device.
279
00:10:18,971 --> 00:10:20,919
It's just taking me a little
while to figure this out.
280
00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:22,274
Oh, wow.
281
00:10:22,708 --> 00:10:24,775
I always thought that you were,
like, a tech whiz or something,
282
00:10:26,033 --> 00:10:27,267
but I guess I was dead wrong on that.
283
00:10:27,295 --> 00:10:30,653
No, I am, but you can't
just change the return policy
284
00:10:30,766 --> 00:10:32,433
without telling the people
who do the damn returns.
285
00:10:32,434 --> 00:10:34,386
Okay, calm down, slugger.
I'll get Preeti over here.
286
00:10:34,387 --> 00:10:35,486
She's a whiz. Hey, Preeti!
287
00:10:35,522 --> 00:10:37,347
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You don't need to do that.
288
00:10:37,348 --> 00:10:38,456
I got this, okay?
289
00:10:38,491 --> 00:10:40,257
It's just... I'm basically almost done.
290
00:10:40,357 --> 00:10:41,390
Seriously.
291
00:10:41,425 --> 00:10:42,575
Well, if you're sure.
292
00:10:42,576 --> 00:10:43,928
Never mind, Preeti!
293
00:10:43,929 --> 00:10:46,122
I thought I had a use for
your computer science degree,
294
00:10:46,123 --> 00:10:47,142
but nope.
295
00:10:47,164 --> 00:10:48,659
Keep mopping up that blood.
296
00:10:50,114 --> 00:10:52,044
Hey, girl, how you holding up?
297
00:10:52,045 --> 00:10:53,832
Yeah, we are so sorry.
298
00:10:53,833 --> 00:10:55,531
Thanks. I'm okay.
299
00:10:55,532 --> 00:10:57,492
Great. That's really great.
300
00:10:57,494 --> 00:10:59,550
I mean, not great.
301
00:10:59,557 --> 00:11:02,258
Ah... Biscuit is still...
302
00:11:02,867 --> 00:11:06,322
Ah... so how did it all go down?
303
00:11:06,323 --> 00:11:09,116
You know, like, I'm just trying
to wrap my head around
304
00:11:09,117 --> 00:11:11,783
the exact chain of events.
305
00:11:11,982 --> 00:11:13,378
Jonah, come on.
306
00:11:13,510 --> 00:11:15,198
The last thing Sandra needs right now
307
00:11:15,199 --> 00:11:17,409
is to relive Biscuit's
expensive procedure.
308
00:11:17,795 --> 00:11:20,329
Actually, Biscuit didn't
get to have the procedure.
309
00:11:20,431 --> 00:11:24,275
She was with Jerry when she
just kind of keeled over.
310
00:11:26,049 --> 00:11:27,089
Oh.
311
00:11:27,090 --> 00:11:28,620
You guys are probably
wondering what happened
312
00:11:28,621 --> 00:11:30,552
to all that money y'all donated.
313
00:11:30,553 --> 00:11:31,997
- What? No.
- We would...
314
00:11:31,998 --> 00:11:34,382
no, that did not even cross our minds.
315
00:11:34,383 --> 00:11:35,892
Forgot if I even put in any.
316
00:11:35,893 --> 00:11:37,361
I don't remember if...
317
00:11:37,362 --> 00:11:39,095
I did. I definitely chipped in. I did.
318
00:11:39,096 --> 00:11:40,810
Well, don't worry.
319
00:11:41,645 --> 00:11:43,244
The money went to a good place.
320
00:11:44,521 --> 00:11:45,844
It's Biscuit.
321
00:11:46,450 --> 00:11:47,749
Uh, what?
322
00:11:48,192 --> 00:11:50,898
The vet's office recommended
this thing called eternalizing
323
00:11:51,202 --> 00:11:52,370
where they take your pet's remains,
324
00:11:52,371 --> 00:11:54,299
and they turn it into a diamond.
325
00:11:54,832 --> 00:11:56,531
Now she'll be with me forever.
326
00:11:56,567 --> 00:11:57,630
Isn't that amazing?
327
00:11:58,362 --> 00:12:00,992
Wow, look what you did there. That's...
328
00:12:01,452 --> 00:12:02,685
that is just...
329
00:12:03,173 --> 00:12:04,410
wow...
330
00:12:06,638 --> 00:12:08,591
We didn't give her money for a diamond.
331
00:12:08,658 --> 00:12:10,533
I wouldn't even buy myself a diamond
332
00:12:10,534 --> 00:12:12,067
even though it goes
perfectly with my brand.
333
00:12:12,234 --> 00:12:13,900
Look, guys, maybe we should just
334
00:12:13,936 --> 00:12:15,035
cut Sandra a little slack.
335
00:12:15,070 --> 00:12:16,169
You know, she's grieving.
336
00:12:16,205 --> 00:12:18,171
I'm grieving the $4 I kicked in.
337
00:12:18,207 --> 00:12:19,317
You only gave four?
338
00:12:19,319 --> 00:12:21,844
I gave two $2 bills, man.
That's a big deal.
339
00:12:21,845 --> 00:12:23,182
Okay, we need to get our money back.
340
00:12:23,183 --> 00:12:25,040
Maybe she could ask for a refund.
341
00:12:25,421 --> 00:12:26,498
How's that gonna work?
342
00:12:26,499 --> 00:12:28,006
"Here, I'm giving back the diamond
343
00:12:28,007 --> 00:12:29,753
that has fried pieces of my cat in it."
344
00:12:29,754 --> 00:12:31,615
Let's all just relax, okay?
345
00:12:31,616 --> 00:12:34,903
I mean, one way to look
at it is, we all donated
346
00:12:34,904 --> 00:12:36,779
so that Biscuit could be
around a little bit longer,
347
00:12:36,780 --> 00:12:38,784
and now Biscuit's around for eternity,
348
00:12:38,785 --> 00:12:41,610
so, you know, good return
on our investment.
349
00:12:41,611 --> 00:12:43,377
I totally get why Amy left you.
350
00:12:43,420 --> 00:12:45,059
Okay, you know what,
if you're so fired up,
351
00:12:45,060 --> 00:12:47,748
why don't you go up to Sandra
and demand the money back?
352
00:12:47,784 --> 00:12:48,949
Fine.
353
00:12:48,985 --> 00:12:50,231
Someone has to take charge.
354
00:12:50,232 --> 00:12:51,278
- You go, boy.
- Yes.
355
00:12:51,279 --> 00:12:52,913
- That's what I'm talking about.
- You're the man.
356
00:12:52,914 --> 00:12:54,936
Immigrants. We get the job done.
357
00:12:55,182 --> 00:12:56,196
We?
358
00:12:56,233 --> 00:12:58,970
My family is Swedish or something.
359
00:12:59,871 --> 00:13:01,604
Man, Bo's the best.
360
00:13:01,606 --> 00:13:03,284
We're gonna be legends after this.
361
00:13:03,300 --> 00:13:04,689
I know right? "Oops! All Berries"?
362
00:13:04,691 --> 00:13:06,247
More like "Oops! All Babadooks."
363
00:13:06,302 --> 00:13:07,529
Hey, criminals.
364
00:13:08,151 --> 00:13:09,860
Yeah, I'll take that as a confession.
365
00:13:10,475 --> 00:13:12,184
Hey, lady, you gotta social distance!
366
00:13:12,185 --> 00:13:14,102
- I have a roommate who's 37.
- It's not safe.
367
00:13:14,103 --> 00:13:16,627
- It's a critical danger zone.
- What's going on here?
368
00:13:16,628 --> 00:13:18,956
These two morons have been
defacing the entire store
369
00:13:18,957 --> 00:13:20,931
by putting up all these
pictures of Diane Keaton,
370
00:13:20,932 --> 00:13:22,685
but you chose the wrong woman
371
00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:24,535
in the wrong store on the wrong day.
372
00:13:24,781 --> 00:13:25,794
Wrong for you.
373
00:13:25,795 --> 00:13:27,929
For me it would be right woman,
right store... just go.
374
00:13:27,935 --> 00:13:30,269
- Move it.
- Yeah, let 'em have it, Dina.
375
00:13:30,270 --> 00:13:33,808
You sink your teeth into this
juicy security situation.
376
00:13:33,809 --> 00:13:35,785
Take all the time you need!
377
00:13:36,092 --> 00:13:37,559
You've made a wise choice.
378
00:13:37,587 --> 00:13:39,554
Ojai Medical is the ultimate source
379
00:13:39,623 --> 00:13:40,963
for all your medical needs.
380
00:13:40,964 --> 00:13:43,198
Well, I don't really
have a medical need.
381
00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:44,466
I'm just retail worker
382
00:13:44,535 --> 00:13:46,334
who's trying to return
a dialysis machine.
383
00:13:46,343 --> 00:13:49,377
- The OM OptiFlow 800.
- Sure.
384
00:13:49,379 --> 00:13:51,379
The OptiFlow 800 is a revolution
385
00:13:51,381 --> 00:13:52,915
in the world of hemodialysis.
386
00:13:53,257 --> 00:13:54,821
With integrated bolus tracking,
387
00:13:54,823 --> 00:13:56,027
it's never easier...
388
00:13:56,028 --> 00:13:57,136
Hey, no, no, no. Look.
389
00:13:57,142 --> 00:13:59,265
I don't care how it works
or what kind of tracking it has.
390
00:13:59,266 --> 00:14:00,717
Integrated bolus tracking.
391
00:14:00,718 --> 00:14:02,424
Right. I don't care.
392
00:14:02,460 --> 00:14:04,667
I just need the product number
so I can get on with my life.
393
00:14:04,735 --> 00:14:05,760
What?
394
00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:08,551
Are you seriously trying
to return that right now?
395
00:14:08,552 --> 00:14:10,675
Yeah, I bought it at DCI Marine,
396
00:14:10,676 --> 00:14:12,378
but the website said
I could return it here.
397
00:14:12,379 --> 00:14:14,030
Hope you're not in a hurry.
398
00:14:14,031 --> 00:14:15,864
I think he's new.
399
00:14:15,899 --> 00:14:17,265
Come on.
400
00:14:19,469 --> 00:14:21,341
Look, Sandra, we need to talk.
401
00:14:21,477 --> 00:14:23,211
What's up?
402
00:14:24,808 --> 00:14:26,308
Uh...
403
00:14:26,343 --> 00:14:28,009
When you see the diamond up close,
404
00:14:28,045 --> 00:14:29,744
it really is gorgeous.
405
00:14:30,002 --> 00:14:32,480
I was like, "Is this Sandra
or Mariah Carey?"
406
00:14:32,516 --> 00:14:34,282
I thought you were the mean one.
407
00:14:34,703 --> 00:14:36,718
I am. I'm vicious!
408
00:14:36,984 --> 00:14:38,486
This morning I told Justine,
409
00:14:38,522 --> 00:14:40,422
her hair looks like spaghetti
that's been left in the pot.
410
00:14:40,423 --> 00:14:42,123
What? No you didn't.
411
00:14:42,159 --> 00:14:43,325
Oh, I'm sorry.
412
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:44,859
I was thinking it.
I guess I didn't say it.
413
00:14:44,895 --> 00:14:46,328
Guys, we did a good deed.
414
00:14:46,363 --> 00:14:47,740
Okay, let's just leave it at that.
415
00:14:47,741 --> 00:14:49,030
Not everything has to be about money.
416
00:14:49,066 --> 00:14:50,098
I'll try and remember that
417
00:14:50,133 --> 00:14:52,070
when I'm not watching "Ray Donovan."
418
00:14:59,509 --> 00:15:01,810
See, I told you my boys
would hook you up.
419
00:15:01,845 --> 00:15:03,511
I can't thank you enough.
420
00:15:03,547 --> 00:15:06,014
This worked out even
better than I had hoped.
421
00:15:06,055 --> 00:15:08,489
I have never seen Dina so jazzed.
422
00:15:08,518 --> 00:15:11,152
Tight. Yeah, you
think she's jazzed now?
423
00:15:11,188 --> 00:15:12,721
She's about to have
a freaking jazzeurysm.
424
00:15:12,756 --> 00:15:15,357
Yeah, what does that mean?
425
00:15:15,392 --> 00:15:17,341
Oh, you know what?
Since you're my boss-in-law,
426
00:15:17,342 --> 00:15:19,142
I decided to give you the VIP package.
427
00:15:19,178 --> 00:15:21,699
Told my boys Titus and Frisco
to put the word out there
428
00:15:21,700 --> 00:15:23,524
you're trying to find security flaws
429
00:15:23,525 --> 00:15:25,266
and that people should just go buck!
430
00:15:25,951 --> 00:15:29,123
Uh, wait, how many people
are gonna go buck?
431
00:15:29,281 --> 00:15:30,847
Oh, don't worry. Plenty, yeah.
432
00:15:31,061 --> 00:15:32,961
'Cause Titus reached out
to his old crystal dealer,
433
00:15:33,071 --> 00:15:34,071
Straight Josh.
434
00:15:34,072 --> 00:15:35,737
I don't even mess with that guy.
435
00:15:35,794 --> 00:15:38,495
He once killed an ice
cream man in the daytime
436
00:15:38,530 --> 00:15:39,545
'cause of sprinkles.
437
00:15:39,546 --> 00:15:41,698
Wha... oh, no. No, no, no, no.
438
00:15:41,734 --> 00:15:44,771
You gotta tell them that the
security test is canceled, okay?
439
00:15:44,772 --> 00:15:46,122
Or that it's at Big Lots.
440
00:15:46,404 --> 00:15:47,870
Tell them that it's at Big Lots.
441
00:15:47,879 --> 00:15:49,667
Uh, no, I think it's
too late, you know?
442
00:15:49,701 --> 00:15:51,346
They're already on
their way and stuff, so...
443
00:15:51,347 --> 00:15:53,220
hey, maybe I can get
a free hot dog as a thank you?
444
00:15:54,526 --> 00:15:56,759
Uh, 'scuse me, I'm just
confirming my free hot dog.
445
00:16:00,772 --> 00:16:02,173
See this?
446
00:16:02,208 --> 00:16:03,975
This is to ensure that
everything that happens
447
00:16:03,976 --> 00:16:06,677
in this room comports
not only with corporate policy,
448
00:16:06,712 --> 00:16:08,913
but also Missouri state law.
449
00:16:12,318 --> 00:16:14,285
Huh. Wow.
450
00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:15,886
I got this out of the returns bin.
451
00:16:15,922 --> 00:16:18,689
I guess it's defective,
just like the two of you!
452
00:16:18,724 --> 00:16:20,224
Unnecessary.
453
00:16:20,703 --> 00:16:22,560
What was the plan, fudge stain?
454
00:16:22,595 --> 00:16:23,861
Huh? Post this online?
455
00:16:23,896 --> 00:16:25,896
Get internet famous? Please.
456
00:16:25,899 --> 00:16:27,199
It's all about chugging cranberry juice
457
00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:28,352
to Fleetwood Mac now.
458
00:16:28,539 --> 00:16:31,602
Dang, they take this crap way serious.
459
00:16:31,637 --> 00:16:33,938
Something you'd like to share
with the class, turd melon?
460
00:16:33,973 --> 00:16:36,040
Oh, it's just, Bo didn't say
that this security test
461
00:16:36,075 --> 00:16:37,541
- was gonna be so intense.
- Yeah.
462
00:16:37,577 --> 00:16:39,577
It's kinda dope though.
It's like an escape room.
463
00:16:39,612 --> 00:16:40,878
Oh, those are fun.
464
00:16:40,913 --> 00:16:43,321
Wait, Bo? You two know Bo?
465
00:16:43,322 --> 00:16:45,847
Yeah, he said the manager
needed people to come, like,
466
00:16:45,848 --> 00:16:48,752
mess up the store to, like,
find the weak spots and stuff.
467
00:16:48,788 --> 00:16:52,089
Weak sp... that son of a bitch.
468
00:16:52,419 --> 00:16:54,581
Glenn did this to
keep me out of his way.
469
00:16:54,582 --> 00:16:56,261
Oh, it sounds like
you two need to talk.
470
00:17:01,834 --> 00:17:03,334
Dude, I'm, like, in
love with this chick.
471
00:17:03,369 --> 00:17:04,515
Hell yeah.
472
00:17:05,622 --> 00:17:07,471
Well, took me a while to figure out
473
00:17:07,506 --> 00:17:09,809
how to square the interfaces
474
00:17:09,810 --> 00:17:11,742
and set up a proxy server,
475
00:17:11,777 --> 00:17:14,078
but we are all set,
476
00:17:14,113 --> 00:17:15,779
and you guys can get back
477
00:17:15,815 --> 00:17:18,616
to your very specific lives.
478
00:17:18,651 --> 00:17:19,750
This says it's a return
479
00:17:19,785 --> 00:17:21,986
for 305 bunches of green grapes.
480
00:17:22,021 --> 00:17:23,621
Yeah, mine says it's for grapes too.
481
00:17:23,902 --> 00:17:25,222
This isn't fraud, is it?
482
00:17:25,258 --> 00:17:27,172
'Cause my probation doesn't
give me a lot of wiggle room.
483
00:17:27,276 --> 00:17:28,293
Oh...
484
00:17:28,294 --> 00:17:30,261
Yeah, you know what?
I wouldn't worry about it.
485
00:17:30,296 --> 00:17:34,296
That's just internal
tech jargon, you know?
486
00:17:34,333 --> 00:17:38,269
SMIs and SKU readouts,
grapes, reverse grapes.
487
00:17:38,304 --> 00:17:40,436
Those are the ones that'll
really give you trouble.
488
00:17:41,641 --> 00:17:42,673
What the hell?
489
00:17:48,514 --> 00:17:50,585
Wait, please stop!
490
00:17:50,586 --> 00:17:51,804
Ooh!
491
00:17:52,685 --> 00:17:54,818
- Go, go, go!
- Damn.
492
00:17:55,106 --> 00:17:56,954
Titus and Frisco really hooked it up!
493
00:17:56,989 --> 00:17:58,255
I know. Maybe we should hire them
494
00:17:58,291 --> 00:18:00,133
to dox that crossing guard we hate.
495
00:18:00,660 --> 00:18:02,126
No!
496
00:18:02,561 --> 00:18:04,478
Oh, Dina, you gotta do something.
497
00:18:04,479 --> 00:18:06,114
They're tearing this place apart.
498
00:18:06,115 --> 00:18:08,265
Save it; I know
what's really going on, okay?
499
00:18:08,301 --> 00:18:10,334
Wow, how many dirtbags
did you get in on this thing?
500
00:18:10,609 --> 00:18:12,970
All right, everybody,
great performances,
501
00:18:13,005 --> 00:18:14,972
but you can all go home to your futons!
502
00:18:15,007 --> 00:18:17,574
No, Dina, these are real gang members.
503
00:18:17,610 --> 00:18:19,276
They killed an ice cream man.
504
00:18:19,278 --> 00:18:20,978
Okay, sure, you want me
to play this out with you?
505
00:18:21,013 --> 00:18:22,846
No problem. No, no, no!
506
00:18:22,882 --> 00:18:24,226
You're gonna get into big trouble
507
00:18:24,227 --> 00:18:25,349
because you're a criminal
508
00:18:25,384 --> 00:18:27,017
and not just a member
of an improv troupe!
509
00:18:27,053 --> 00:18:28,285
[bleep] off, lady.
510
00:18:28,321 --> 00:18:30,020
Ah, profanity. That's a nice touch.
511
00:18:30,056 --> 00:18:32,444
Dina, he is actually stealing that.
512
00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:33,857
You need to do something.
513
00:18:33,893 --> 00:18:36,041
I know, but he's just so intimidating.
514
00:18:36,042 --> 00:18:38,548
It's almost like I feel like
I have to help him.
515
00:18:38,549 --> 00:18:41,105
- Here, I'll give you a hand.
- No, Dina!
516
00:18:41,106 --> 00:18:42,407
Where's he having you stash this stuff?
517
00:18:42,408 --> 00:18:43,692
Out by the garden center?
518
00:18:45,503 --> 00:18:47,819
We just finished stocking
those blenders too.
519
00:18:48,131 --> 00:18:49,965
- Aah!
- Hey, hey!
520
00:18:50,441 --> 00:18:51,607
Our diamond!
521
00:18:52,123 --> 00:18:53,309
Biscuit!
522
00:18:53,518 --> 00:18:55,618
They probably put very little Biscuit
523
00:18:55,653 --> 00:18:56,687
in there anyway.
524
00:19:03,161 --> 00:19:04,694
Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.
525
00:19:04,729 --> 00:19:06,863
Oh, they are gonna fire me.
526
00:19:06,898 --> 00:19:08,064
In retrospect,
527
00:19:08,099 --> 00:19:10,130
I probably shouldn't have
helped steal that minifridge.
528
00:19:10,401 --> 00:19:11,891
Or the washer/dryer combo.
529
00:19:12,403 --> 00:19:13,636
The second minifridge.
530
00:19:13,671 --> 00:19:16,513
Oh, God, I could go to jail for this!
531
00:19:16,841 --> 00:19:19,787
And then my cellmate is
gonna ask to borrow my comb,
532
00:19:19,788 --> 00:19:21,102
and I won't be able to say no.
533
00:19:21,103 --> 00:19:23,272
Take a breath, man.
You're not getting fired.
534
00:19:23,273 --> 00:19:24,327
Okay?
535
00:19:24,328 --> 00:19:25,955
I'll amortize the shrink
over the next year
536
00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:27,797
and borrow overstock
from the Quincy branch.
537
00:19:27,798 --> 00:19:29,988
The manager and I follow
the same Korean softball league.
538
00:19:30,365 --> 00:19:31,679
Wow, okay.
539
00:19:31,893 --> 00:19:33,445
What if the ruffians come back?
540
00:19:33,588 --> 00:19:35,221
Not to worry,
I've been texting with Titus,
541
00:19:35,230 --> 00:19:36,411
and he's handling it on the street.
542
00:19:36,412 --> 00:19:38,379
That kid would literally do
anything for me.
543
00:19:39,487 --> 00:19:41,753
You are really saving my rump.
544
00:19:41,883 --> 00:19:42,890
Well, you still got
545
00:19:42,892 --> 00:19:44,759
a few usable brain cells
rattling around.
546
00:19:46,862 --> 00:19:48,184
You know this job is a lot.
547
00:19:48,811 --> 00:19:52,366
And I'm still trying to keep
my stress level down.
548
00:19:52,708 --> 00:19:54,841
Do you think maybe we could, you know,
549
00:19:54,862 --> 00:19:57,663
talk corporate into some sort
of co manager arrangement?
550
00:19:57,665 --> 00:19:59,306
I mean, if you'd be open to it.
551
00:19:59,401 --> 00:20:01,804
Sort of a "two heads are
better than one" thing?
552
00:20:02,624 --> 00:20:05,407
Animals born with two heads
usually die almost immediately,
553
00:20:05,413 --> 00:20:07,346
but sure.
554
00:20:07,870 --> 00:20:09,394
I'm honored you asked me.
555
00:20:09,765 --> 00:20:11,328
I'm honored you'd accept.
556
00:20:19,948 --> 00:20:21,619
Oh, hey, guys, I don't
know if you heard,
557
00:20:21,620 --> 00:20:23,549
but Sandra's cat died yesterday,
558
00:20:23,550 --> 00:20:25,404
and then her diamond
necklace got stolen,
559
00:20:25,405 --> 00:20:28,079
so a few us are collecting
money to help her out.
560
00:20:28,477 --> 00:20:30,859
Cheyenne, I mean this
in the nicest way:
561
00:20:31,506 --> 00:20:33,673
Get the hell away
from me with that jar.
562
00:20:37,012 --> 00:20:38,878
What's this about?
563
00:20:50,968 --> 00:20:54,134
Excuse me, I was told
I'd find the manager back here.
564
00:20:55,310 --> 00:20:57,310
- We are the manager.
- Right here.
565
00:20:59,623 --> 00:21:00,637
This is to inform you
566
00:21:00,643 --> 00:21:02,291
that you are being served
with legal papers
567
00:21:02,292 --> 00:21:04,482
in the matter of
Carol Malloon v. Cloud 9.
568
00:21:04,887 --> 00:21:06,179
Thank you.
569
00:21:07,540 --> 00:21:08,925
Do we know a Carol Malloon?
570
00:21:08,927 --> 00:21:11,429
Yeah, Carol! Carol Carol.
571
00:21:11,432 --> 00:21:13,352
Oh. Oh, right.
572
00:21:13,353 --> 00:21:15,969
We electrocuted her.
Yeah, a lawsuit makes sense.
573
00:21:18,783 --> 00:21:20,783
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