All language subtitles for The.Office.US.S07E19.Garage.Sale.720p.BrRip.2CH.x265.HEVC-PSA

Hey, Oscar.
Big Will & Grace fan, huh?

Nope.

Everybody assumes I am.
I always get them as gifts.

Dunder Mifflin
is having our
first ever garage sale.

Like many Americans,

we realized we
had a lot of things
that we didn't really need.

And 10 cents of every dollar
is going into the party fund

so we can throw parties
for ourselves.

People, look alive!

It's show time!

Doors open in
three, two, one!

Ooh! Yikes!

It's cold, Dwight.
Just shut the door

and let people
come in the front.

It's good that it's cold.
It will drive business inside.

The signs will
drive business inside.

The warmth will
lure people inside.

Just close it.

This is how...
I'm not closing the door.

Close the door. Close it.

Close it.
Stop it!

PAM: Kevin, shut the door.

DWIGHT: Uh-oh!

Looks like someone's
sign's a little crooked.

It looks awful.

Need a thumb tack?
Sure.

Not so fast.

Schrutes are farmers by hobby
and traders by trade.

Through the art
of the swap,

I will walk out
of this garage sale
with the finest item here.

I will trade you
for the used candle.

Forget you.

Come on.
It's trash, like your sign,
unless you have this.

Fine. Just give it.

That's how it's done.

Whoa! I love her.
How much for that?

I actually don't know
why I brought that

because it's
kind of priceless.

Ten dollars.

No. I paid $500 for that.

$200.
$500.

$20.
$45.

Get lost.
Damn it.

And that is how you do it.

We don't have to sell
that if you don't want.

If it's a problem
with the neon,

I can have my
neon guy take a look.

No, you know what,
it's really more
for a bachelor pad.

I just want to
get a fair price.

Well, we could put it
in storage in case.

In case?
In case of what?

You know, in case maybe
something changes.

I don't have an "in case."
Do you have an "in case"?

Nope.

How much for
the Slip 'n Slide?

Get lost.

Yes, hello, Mr. Flax.
This is Michael Scott,
your daughter's boss.

I am calling because
I am going to have to
fire your daughter Holly

because she's such
a terrible employee.

I'm just kidding.

I'm kidding.
I am actually calling

because I'm
in love with her.

I love your daughter,
and I have for some time.

And I would like to
discuss my intentions
with you,

which are to ask
her to marry me.

And I was just hoping
that you would give me
your approval.

And this isn't a joke.
So call me back
when you get this.

And I look forward to
speaking. Thank you.

Mmm.

Are you serious?
A half-used candle?
Get out of here, Dwight.

You're blocking my table
with your giant body.

Because there's
a huge line of people

who want your
spinster tchotchkes.

Screw you, man.
People like my stuff.

People like Ryan?

Let me tell you
about men like him.

He comes over and
you're like, "Hey, baby,
let me light a candle."

And you pull out
this one, half used.

He's like,
"Who else is she seeing?
I better lock her down fast."

You can take my Helen
Fielding collection.

And the Jennifer
Weiner collection.

Oh, my gosh,
you have the Dallas
board game?

Yeah. When I was a kid,
I was on Dallas.

Really?
Yeah.

We missed our
connecting flight

and we spent
the entire day
on Dallas.

Then we spent
a week on Hawaii.
I was on heaven.

We should play it.

Well, there's
no instructions.

It's Dallas, the game.
We can figure it out.

Yeah.

I'm pretty good
at board games.

Well, should we make it
a little interesting?

Sure.

What is this?

How did those get out?
I'm sorry.

"Professor Copperfield's
Miracle Legumes"?

I was in Jamaica
and I got lost,

and it was getting
dark this one night
and then out of nowhere,

this guy comes with a cart
and he's selling these.

Dwight, he told me
things about myself

that there's no way
he could have known.

That's a common
swindler's trick.

Probably. Probably.

So I buy some,
I turn the corner,
I feel like an idiot,

so I go back to
get my money
and he was gone.

So you want to
sell me magic beans?

Correction. I do not
want to sell you

"Professor Copperfield's
Miracle Legumes."

Nice try. No, correction,
terrible try.

Michael called Dad?

WOMAN: Your friend, Michael,
yes. What's going on?

Um...

I think I know,
but I'll sound
stupid if I'm wrong.

Is Dad there?

MAN: Hollis?
Hi, Dad.

There was a program
on TV about India.

Okay. Did you
connect with Michael?

You want to watch it?

I'm not there, Dad.
I'm in Pennsylvania.

What... What are
you doing there?

I live here.

Can I talk to
you about Michael?

I'll put your mother on.

No, no, no, Dad...
WOMAN: Holly?

Mom, Dad can't seem to
focus on the subject.

Don't you worry about him.
He's got me.

Well, who do you have?

I have your father.
He's right here.
I'll put him on.

No, Mom.

Oh! Which one's decaf?

Michael! Michael! Hey!
Hi!

Hi, I'm just coming out to
see what you're doing
and maybe stop you.

Ah!

You know what?
Do you have a siphon?

I think I'm going
to run out of gas.

Why do you
need more gas?

Well, I'm writing a message.

Is it a good message
or a bad message?

I'm asking Holly
a question in fire.

Are you proposing?

Maybe.

Wow!

You know what?
I've got gas on my
hands and my shoes.

Would you...
Would you light it?
Do the honors, please?

Yeah. Yeah. No problem.

Pam?
Yep.

Could you light this, please?

Michael,
you've had two ideas today,
and one of them was great

and the other
one was terrible.

I am not in the mood
for riddles, Pam.

This is terrible.

No, this is romantic.

You know what?
I'm going to get a hose
and then we'll talk about it.

Okay, we'll figure it out.

I'll be right back.
Just stay there.

Free sample?

My mom makes the
best pesto in the world.

And I always tell her,
"Mom, you should sell this.

"You'd make a fortune."

And she always says,
"No, it's just for family."

Well, finally I was like,
"... it. I'll sell it."

So I'm like, "Mom,
I need you to make
a ton of pesto

"for a pesto party
for all my friends."

She's like, "Okay."
Pesto party? Really?

Anyway, she makes
like 100 bottles worth.
It's so good.

And Phyllis just
had that "mom look"
I wanted.

You got this
kosher certified?

No. I meant like,
"It's cool. It's kosher.
It's all good."

Ryan, you have such
an interesting mind.
So creative.

All these new business
ideas and artistic projects.

Thank you.
What you got there?

It's just
Stanley's old photo album.

I was thinking
about throwing it
in the garbage.

I mean, why would I
want some random black
man's old photo album

sitting on my book shelf?
I'm not James Franco.

Things are going very well.

I traded a thumb tack
for Meredith's junk,

for Kelly's crap,
for Phyllis's garbage,

for Oscar's trash,
for Stanley's crap,

for Ryan's junk,
for Creed's garbage,

for a very cute squid
that Erin happened to have.

Jim, put those away.

I'm really sorry.
Pam must've put those out.

All right,
just out of curiosity,

what were the claims
for those beans?

They're legumes, Dwight.

And you're just
going to make fun of me,
so why would I...

You know what?
This ends now.

Hey, Michael,
everyone's in
the conference room.

Why?

You called a meeting.
I don't...

I did?

Okay.
Thank you all for coming.

I would like to
talk to you today
about recycling.

Michael.
Yes?

We are a family.
I could not agree
with you more.

And I've always
believed that we should
all be very involved

in one another's
personal lives in
a very major way.

Yes. Thank you.

So about this proposal thing.

No, no, no, no.
My mind's made up.

I am not going
to change my mind.

You can't
talk me out of it.

Michael,
she's perfect for you.

She's the one.

She's amazing.
This is very exciting.

So we just...
We want to help
you plan the proposal

so that it's safe,
and responsible,
and realistic and doable.

I had a great idea
until you ruined it.

You want to know
how to do it?

Here's how you do it.
Take her out to dinner,
go down on one knee.

If you are in a costume,
you did something wrong.

If at any point,
you find yourself

tying the ring
to a dog's collar,

stop and look at yourself.

Hmm.

I'm going to play me
a little old blackmail card.

Nice.

And call a proxy meeting

and take control of
Ewing Oil once and for all.

No, you can't do that.

You can't play
a blackmail card

and call a proxy meeting
in the same turn.

Why not?
It seems to me we're
just making up rules

because somebody forgot
to staple the rule book

to the inside of the game,
like a normal human being.

And I'm going
to play this here
"share the wealth" card.

Which entitles me
to half of both
of you all's money.

So, if you don't mind.

No, this card is
from the wrong game.

This is from
The Game of Life.

It was in the box.

Well played.
Thank you.

We must honorably
adhere to the rules

that we are
making up on the spot.

No, but that's not fair.

Well, that's Dallas.

Dallas indeed.

What? Ryan, where did
you get this picture?

My mom also
makes the best salsa.

This is your mom's
old stuff?

Yeah, mostly.

How's she doing?

It didn't go down easy,
but she's made some friends

and it's already
better than it was.

How do you know
when it's time?

I don't know
if you ever know.

And if you wait for
the day when your parent
comes to you and says,

"I can't take care of myself,"
that's never going to happen.

I have a box of
bras under the table
if you're interested.

Let me see.

Okay, I think animals
and proposals are out.
Right, Ryan?

Didn't you read in
one of your blogs
that animals...

Blogs are out,
but people are texting
each other, "No more animals."

How about this?

I throw a corpse
dressed like me
off of the roof.

It hits the ground...
Yep.

...the head pops off.

This leads to me
saying the line,

"I lost my head when I
fell in love with you."

That's a guarantee.

Easy enough
to get a corpse.

You just go to a med school.
I already have the ring.

Don't think you
need the corpse then.

There's the ring.

Holy... Is that real?

Yeah.

They say three-year salary.

Is she not going
to like that?

No, she's going to love it,

so I think you can
keep the proposal simple.

You know,
like when Jim proposed.

He just...
He got down on one knee

and he told me
that he loved me

and he asked me
to marry him,
and it was perfect.

Where was that?

At a gas station.

At a gas station?

Well, it was when
she was working
in New York,

so it was halfway
between both of us.

That must have
been a surprise

when at the gas
station you proposed.

No, it was really...
It was really sweet.
It was raining and...

Yeah, you didn't say
that the weather was bad.

That sounds perfect.

I want this to be an event
that everyone talks about
always and forever.

Totally reasonable.

I just... It's terrifying.

She's not going to say no.

I know, but I'm still scared.
I don't know why.

Because it's a big deal.

I mean, I knew Pam
was going to say yes,
but I was still scared.

You were scared?

Yeah, it's scary.

Get this.
Kevin thought I was going
to sell my Bowflex for $200.

And I told him,
"Dude, this was
a prop in my movie."

Look, I need to talk to you.

Okay. It's because we
haven't sold anything.

You know what?
You just wait until
the end of the day,

people will get desperate
and they're going
to pay anything.

I think I need to
go home to Colorado.

My dad isn't doing so well.

Oh!

Okay. For how long?

I don't know.

Is he all right?
Yeah.

Are you okay?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I just, you know...

I just don't want to
go home when he's
on his death bed.

You know, I want to
be there when
he's still my dad.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, you
definitely need to do that.

And I want you
to come with me.

I know that's a lot
to ask of a boyfriend.

Okay.

And I was thinking,
you know, maybe,

since given our
last conversation

and that we're both ready...

Michael Scott, will you...

No, no. Shut it.

Oh, God,
nope, nope, nope.

What?

No, I am not going
to be proposed to
in the break room.

That is not going
to be our story.

Mmm-mmm.

Should have
burned this place down
when I had a chance.

Hey, guys, it's my turn.

You can't go. You're dead.
I shot you five moves ago.

Yeah, I told you,
you can't shoot people.

I told you we're
way past rules.

We have been
for some time now.

I start having rules now,
everything we've
built collapses.

Well, this is stupid,
and I want my money back.

Where's the money?

Yeah, where is it?

Okay. You know what?
I am never,

ever playing games
with you two again.

And that is Dallas.

RYAN: Nice.
JIM: Not bad, right?

RYAN: I can't really tell,
but...

Nice.

I know, right?

What the...

Oh, my God.

That's impossible.
It is, right?

I mean, it's impossible.

All right. I'll take them.

They're probably worthless.
Probably.

Leave the telescope.

DWIGHT: I started with
a thumb tack

and traded my way
to a telescope.

But in a way
the most valuable thing here

wasn't the telescope
at all. No.

It was this
packet of beans.

So I traded
the telescope for it,

and I can just go
buy another telescope.

Hey. How'd we do?

Thirteen dollars.
That's great.

And still have most
of our stuff? Good.

Listen, about earlier...

No, no, no, no, no.
Let's not talk about that.

It was wrong to put you
in that position. I...

Michael, you're my life now.

I'm not going to Colorado.

You know what?
Let's go for a little walk.

I want to show you
some stuff.

So this is one of
my favorite places
in the world.

Why?
This is where
Toby announced

that he was
going to Costa Rica.

It was the happiest
day of my life

until the day you
came to replace him.

Let's go in here.

And this is where
we first kissed.

I remember.

And this is where
we first made love.

Oh, yeah.

Remember what
I tried there?

Michael.

Through these blinds
is where I first saw you,

and you had
all these boxes

and I thought you
were the prettiest
mover I'd ever seen.

And I was sitting
at this desk

when I called you to
tell you that I had herpes

and that I was
still in love with you,

and you said that it
was over and that you
didn't love me.

But thank goodness
none of that was true,

including the herpes.
Ingrown hair.
Yes.

Right in here,
this is where we
co-ran our first meeting.

You remember?
Obesity awareness.

Mmm-hmm.

Saved a lot of
lives that day.

That's when you
first met Michael Klump.

"I say, I say,
I'll sit on you."

And right over there,
that's where you realized

that Meredith was
prostituting herself
for Outback steak.

And I will never forget
that you had the cutest
look on your face

because you
couldn't believe it.

You thought
it was so wrong.

And over here...

What happened here?

Well, nothing.
Nothing, really.

I would just find
an excuse to come here

so I could stare at
you through that window.

This is what I'd do.

Nice.

Let's go in here.
Okay.

Hi, guys.

This is where our love
faces its toughest test.

After this,
it's just smooth sailing
for the rest of our lives.

Holly, will you marry me?

No.

Marry me, Holly.

No.

That guy's got more than he
can handle as it is.

Will you marry me?
No.

That marriage
would be a sham.

Will you marry me?
No.

Easy "no."

Will you marry me?
No.

That would be hot.
I would pay to see that.

Will you marry me, Holly?

No.

Only one that I was
kind of worried about.

This is where I
fell in love with you.

And this is where I
ask you to marry me.

It started with...

Holly Flax, marrying me,
will you be?

Your wife becoming,
be will I.

That was so awesome.

Congratulations!

Congratulations!

Thank you. So guys,
guys, guys, guys,

we're moving to Colorado.

All of us?
Yep.

Wait, what?

Holly has to go
back to Colorado.

I'm going with her.
I'm leaving.