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1
00:00:01,200 --> 00:00:03,930
What about this one?
It's kind of badass, right?
2
00:00:05,971 --> 00:00:08,531
It just seems kind
of crazy in a way
I might need right now.
3
00:00:08,707 --> 00:00:13,371
I don't know.
Oh, that's not yours.
4
00:00:13,645 --> 00:00:16,045
JIM: Stanley justdrank OJ out of my mug
5
00:00:16,148 --> 00:00:19,709
and didn't seem to realize
that it wasn't his hot coffee.
6
00:00:19,818 --> 00:00:22,116
So, the question
has to be asked,
7
00:00:22,187 --> 00:00:25,350
is there no limit to
what he won't notice?
8
00:00:25,924 --> 00:00:28,051
What's a seven-letter
word for purse?
9
00:00:29,194 --> 00:00:30,422
Satchel.
10
00:00:30,596 --> 00:00:32,359
No. Starts with an "H."
11
00:00:32,431 --> 00:00:33,659
Handbag!
12
00:00:35,234 --> 00:00:36,223
Hmm, thank you.
13
00:00:38,737 --> 00:00:39,726
Shh.
14
00:00:50,782 --> 00:00:52,477
All right, everybody.
Take a seat.
15
00:00:52,751 --> 00:00:55,811
As you may have heard,
our branch on
the planet Jupiter
16
00:00:55,954 --> 00:00:58,252
is up 8,000% in sales.
17
00:00:58,590 --> 00:00:59,852
18
00:01:03,128 --> 00:01:06,495
Hold up.
That clock is slow.
It is 5:00.
19
00:01:07,232 --> 00:01:08,824
I will see you all
tomorrow.
20
00:01:08,901 --> 00:01:10,266
Bye, Stanley,
love you.
21
00:01:14,339 --> 00:01:15,397
So long, Stanley.
22
00:01:15,474 --> 00:01:16,873
Night, everybody.
23
00:01:43,135 --> 00:01:44,693
So, what kind of
statement are you making
24
00:01:44,770 --> 00:01:46,067
with that costume,
Kevin?
25
00:01:46,171 --> 00:01:48,571
Well, the statement
that I am making, Oscar,
26
00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:50,972
is I kind of look
like Michael Moore.
27
00:01:51,176 --> 00:01:52,473
28
00:01:52,878 --> 00:01:54,209
Dunder Mifflin,
this is Erin.
29
00:01:54,313 --> 00:01:56,941
Happy Halloween.
How can I haunt you today?
30
00:01:57,115 --> 00:01:59,481
A lot of people are
really getting into
Halloween this year.
31
00:01:59,551 --> 00:02:01,018
Six seconds, MacGruber.
32
00:02:01,086 --> 00:02:02,951
Pam's got a lot of
fun stuff planned...
33
00:02:03,789 --> 00:02:05,051
Two seconds, MacGruber.
34
00:02:05,123 --> 00:02:08,286
Including a costume contest
and bobbing for apples
35
00:02:08,594 --> 00:02:09,788
and a ouija board.
36
00:02:09,861 --> 00:02:12,159
Oh! Boom!
Oh! Explosion!
37
00:02:12,364 --> 00:02:13,888
MacGruber!
38
00:02:14,666 --> 00:02:17,294
People are really into
the costume contest
this year.
39
00:02:17,803 --> 00:02:20,431
Might have somethingto do with the prize.Maybe you've heard of it?
40
00:02:20,539 --> 00:02:23,337
The 2011
Scranton-Wilkes-Barre
coupon book,
41
00:02:23,408 --> 00:02:26,809
worth over
$15,000 in savings.
42
00:02:28,847 --> 00:02:30,371
Stop.
Too late.
43
00:02:30,482 --> 00:02:34,009
If I was the real
Scranton Strangler,
you'd be so strangled by now.
44
00:02:34,186 --> 00:02:36,916
And if you're out there,
Strangler, you will
get caught.
45
00:02:36,989 --> 00:02:38,513
By me.
46
00:02:38,757 --> 00:02:40,418
Sounds like
someone's really trying
to convince us
47
00:02:40,492 --> 00:02:42,016
that he's not
the Scranton Strangler.
48
00:02:42,094 --> 00:02:43,857
To my chickens,
I'm the Scranton Strangler.
49
00:02:45,464 --> 00:02:47,432
DWIGHT: Oh-ho.
That's very funny.
50
00:02:48,166 --> 00:02:50,498
Looks like someone
decided to dress up as
old Dwight Schrute's mom.
51
00:02:50,702 --> 00:02:52,465
What?
You're only one-third
as beautiful
52
00:02:52,537 --> 00:02:53,799
and about
half her height.
53
00:02:54,306 --> 00:02:56,672
I am supposed to be Olive Oyl.
And it makes more sense
54
00:02:56,742 --> 00:02:58,869
when I'm standing
next to Popeye,
55
00:02:58,944 --> 00:03:01,412
but Jim doesn't
wanna put his costume on.
56
00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:02,874
I am Popeye.
57
00:03:03,282 --> 00:03:05,648
I've never really
been a costume guy.
58
00:03:05,851 --> 00:03:08,445
Even when I was a kid,it just felt likesomething I was too old for.
59
00:03:09,621 --> 00:03:14,024
And then this morning,
Pam hands me
this little number.
60
00:03:14,793 --> 00:03:15,817
No.
61
00:03:16,094 --> 00:03:20,758
In case you can't read
my, my, my poker face,
62
00:03:20,899 --> 00:03:22,833
We will be reviewing
our sales policies.
63
00:03:24,169 --> 00:03:27,468
I have 10 seconds to
explain them or this
whole place blows up.
64
00:03:27,539 --> 00:03:29,029
MacGruber!
65
00:03:29,941 --> 00:03:31,033
Lame.
66
00:03:31,643 --> 00:03:33,304
Why don't
witches wear panties?
67
00:03:33,445 --> 00:03:34,503
Oh, here we go.
68
00:03:34,780 --> 00:03:36,543
Because they need
to grip the broom.
69
00:03:36,648 --> 00:03:37,808
70
00:03:39,117 --> 00:03:42,609
Oh! Who likes to
water-ski on Lake Eerie?
No, wait.
71
00:03:42,821 --> 00:03:44,049
Where does Dracula
like to water-ski?
72
00:03:44,122 --> 00:03:45,282
Lake Eerie.
73
00:03:45,357 --> 00:03:47,325
When our warehouse workers
make deliveries,
74
00:03:47,392 --> 00:03:50,418
they're gonna be
encouraged to offer clients
extra products.
75
00:03:50,662 --> 00:03:52,459
And then they will
split those commissions
with sales.
76
00:03:52,531 --> 00:03:55,091
Wait,
so drivers are gonna be able
to sell paper on the road?
77
00:03:55,167 --> 00:03:56,156
That is correct.
78
00:03:56,301 --> 00:03:58,292
Has anyone started
calling you
Gabe-wad yet?
79
00:03:58,637 --> 00:03:59,661
Not here, no.
80
00:03:59,738 --> 00:04:00,796
Gabe-wad.
81
00:04:01,873 --> 00:04:03,340
GABE: Okay, guys.
Fun is fun, but...
82
00:04:05,877 --> 00:04:06,866
Blackula.
83
00:04:06,945 --> 00:04:08,037
Dracula.
84
00:04:08,113 --> 00:04:10,843
Oh, so,
and I almost forgot,
85
00:04:11,316 --> 00:04:12,408
you'll find this
hilarious.
86
00:04:12,851 --> 00:04:16,685
Apparently corporate
is going to have drivers
87
00:04:16,755 --> 00:04:19,280
sell paper on
their routes now.
88
00:04:19,358 --> 00:04:22,225
That's, like, exactly
sort of the idea
that you had.
89
00:04:22,527 --> 00:04:26,156
Yes, I do remember saying
something like that to you.
90
00:04:26,465 --> 00:04:27,864
Yeah.
91
00:04:28,934 --> 00:04:29,923
I'm sorry.
92
00:04:30,635 --> 00:04:31,624
I blew this.
93
00:04:31,837 --> 00:04:33,270
You should have gotten
credit for that, man.
94
00:04:33,438 --> 00:04:34,735
I'm just glad
we're gonna try it out.
95
00:04:34,806 --> 00:04:35,932
Really? We're good?
96
00:04:36,108 --> 00:04:37,132
We're cool.
97
00:04:37,209 --> 00:04:38,506
Okay.
98
00:04:38,677 --> 00:04:40,304
Okay.
What's that
in your shirt?
99
00:04:40,846 --> 00:04:41,904
Oh.
100
00:04:41,980 --> 00:04:45,575
That's a ream of paper.
I thought you might hit me.
101
00:04:45,650 --> 00:04:49,916
Darryl Philbin
is the greatest guy
in the world.
102
00:04:50,355 --> 00:04:51,447
And you know
what I'd like?
103
00:04:51,556 --> 00:04:55,856
I would like to have
all the racists
brought together,
104
00:04:55,927 --> 00:04:58,657
and take Darryl Philbin
out to lunch,
105
00:04:58,730 --> 00:05:00,391
just to see what
they're missing.
106
00:05:00,866 --> 00:05:01,855
It's a great stick, right?
107
00:05:01,933 --> 00:05:02,957
RYAN:
It's really good.
108
00:05:03,135 --> 00:05:05,569
A classic.
I feel like you might win
the whole thing with that.
109
00:05:05,804 --> 00:05:07,738
Thanks.
OSCAR:
Everyone realizes
110
00:05:07,806 --> 00:05:11,003
this coupon book
is not actually worth
$15,000, right?
111
00:05:11,076 --> 00:05:13,806
You'd have to spend $200,000
on crap you don't even need
112
00:05:14,212 --> 00:05:15,804
to get $15,000
worth of benefits.
113
00:05:16,415 --> 00:05:18,246
I'm not the only one
who sees this, right?
RYAN: No.
114
00:05:18,316 --> 00:05:19,305
Well, sure.
No.
115
00:05:19,384 --> 00:05:20,373
No.
116
00:05:20,452 --> 00:05:21,441
I get that.
I get that.
117
00:05:21,686 --> 00:05:23,119
Uh, excuse me,
everyone?
118
00:05:23,188 --> 00:05:26,487
I wanna invite you all
to the Halloween party
I'm having at my bar.
119
00:05:26,792 --> 00:05:28,020
You own a bar?
120
00:05:28,226 --> 00:05:30,160
Public School,
at exit 11.
121
00:05:30,695 --> 00:05:34,461
That's a great name.
You're hilarious.
122
00:05:35,467 --> 00:05:36,456
A plus!
123
00:05:36,535 --> 00:05:38,935
So, you're all on the list.
124
00:05:39,037 --> 00:05:42,029
Hey, man,
can I get a plus five?
It's all guys.
125
00:05:42,174 --> 00:05:44,802
Hey, what's the crowd like,
Danny? Our age?
126
00:05:44,943 --> 00:05:45,932
Okay.
127
00:05:46,711 --> 00:05:49,976
I don't think that
she would leave
Jim for Danny.
128
00:05:50,081 --> 00:05:52,072
I don't know.
They're both handsome.
129
00:05:52,250 --> 00:05:56,311
Pam is gonna choose
whoever has a scent
most like that of her father.
130
00:05:56,388 --> 00:05:57,855
Does anyone remember
what her dad smelled like?
131
00:05:58,089 --> 00:05:59,215
I think he...
132
00:05:59,291 --> 00:06:00,383
Hey, hey, gang, quiet.
Here she comes.
133
00:06:01,359 --> 00:06:05,227
Did you hear
about that Danny guy?
Heard he used to date Pam.
134
00:06:05,363 --> 00:06:08,025
So, four years ago,
when I was in Stamford,
Connecticut,
135
00:06:08,133 --> 00:06:11,728
and dating someone else,
Pam went on
two dates with Danny,
136
00:06:11,837 --> 00:06:14,203
which was obviously
the greatest
love story ever told,
137
00:06:14,272 --> 00:06:16,297
given how much people
are walking
on eggshells around us.
138
00:06:16,374 --> 00:06:18,535
We were basically
Romeo and Juliet.
That's right.
139
00:06:18,610 --> 00:06:20,510
Except where
Juliet doesn't have
that great a time
140
00:06:20,579 --> 00:06:22,672
and Romeo doesn't
call back
after two dates.
141
00:06:22,747 --> 00:06:23,805
Yikes.
142
00:06:23,915 --> 00:06:26,611
But I've learned
to love again.
143
00:06:26,685 --> 00:06:28,653
He's a cartoon sailor,
Oh! No.
144
00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:30,984
And he looks so handsome
in his uniform.
No.
145
00:06:31,056 --> 00:06:32,045
Please!
No, I'm not gonna... No.
146
00:06:32,524 --> 00:06:34,856
Tuna! Tuna!
147
00:06:36,061 --> 00:06:37,585
If you want us to
skip this party...
148
00:06:37,762 --> 00:06:38,751
I don't care.
149
00:06:38,830 --> 00:06:41,628
KEVIN:
I am never gonna forgetwhat Danny did to Pam.
150
00:06:41,867 --> 00:06:43,494
I forget nothing.
151
00:06:44,069 --> 00:06:45,161
I'm like an elephant
in that way.
152
00:06:45,237 --> 00:06:46,261
You know what else?
153
00:06:46,338 --> 00:06:49,307
This sucks for Jim, right?
154
00:06:49,374 --> 00:06:50,966
But it also sucks for us
155
00:06:51,042 --> 00:06:53,704
because we don't get invited
to a ton of Halloween parties.
156
00:06:53,778 --> 00:06:56,406
Yeah. And like,
everyone's
gonna be there.
157
00:06:56,548 --> 00:06:58,140
Stanley,
158
00:06:58,216 --> 00:06:59,205
Phyllis,
159
00:06:59,284 --> 00:07:00,478
Angela,
160
00:07:00,552 --> 00:07:01,849
Darryl...
161
00:07:01,953 --> 00:07:04,012
Creed's a maybe.
Creed's going?
162
00:07:06,758 --> 00:07:10,455
Madge from the warehouse
just made her first sale.
163
00:07:10,529 --> 00:07:13,930
Madge! We should
have been doing this
a long time ago.
164
00:07:16,968 --> 00:07:21,428
Erin? Would you
please do me a solid,
165
00:07:21,506 --> 00:07:24,703
and get Darryl Philbin
on the speakerphone?
166
00:07:25,210 --> 00:07:26,302
167
00:07:26,378 --> 00:07:27,436
168
00:07:29,047 --> 00:07:30,071
Hello?
169
00:07:30,148 --> 00:07:31,775
Hi, Darryl,
come out here, please.
170
00:07:32,851 --> 00:07:33,875
I'm good.
171
00:07:34,152 --> 00:07:35,551
You need to stop
being so shy,
172
00:07:35,620 --> 00:07:38,487
come out here and embrace
who you really are, superstar.
173
00:07:38,557 --> 00:07:39,819
This is embarrassing,Michael.
174
00:07:39,891 --> 00:07:40,983
MICHAEL:
Yeah, I bet it is.
175
00:07:41,059 --> 00:07:42,959
You're gonna do
your job well here,
176
00:07:43,028 --> 00:07:44,859
you gotta get used
to being embarrassed.
177
00:07:44,930 --> 00:07:46,227
Well, let me putmy shoes on.
178
00:07:46,998 --> 00:07:48,192
179
00:07:49,768 --> 00:07:51,258
Hit the speakerphone button.
180
00:07:52,037 --> 00:07:54,005
The speakerphone button.
181
00:07:54,105 --> 00:07:55,697
Same button as
you hit before.
182
00:07:56,675 --> 00:07:57,767
Same...
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Your call cannot...
183
00:07:57,842 --> 00:07:58,831
Or sit on it.
184
00:07:59,077 --> 00:08:02,877
This whole
delivery slash sales idea,
you know whose that was?
185
00:08:02,981 --> 00:08:04,107
That was Darryl Philbin's.
186
00:08:04,349 --> 00:08:08,183
He thought of that way before
the corporate fatsuits.
187
00:08:08,420 --> 00:08:10,354
So, what happened?
I got in the way.
188
00:08:10,455 --> 00:08:12,355
I said, "No,"
189
00:08:12,457 --> 00:08:14,550
and it just stopped.
190
00:08:14,626 --> 00:08:17,652
But then, corporate
comes up with this idea.
191
00:08:17,729 --> 00:08:21,358
But you know what?
They need to know
that it was yours.
192
00:08:21,433 --> 00:08:23,094
And I don't care
if I take a bullet.
193
00:08:23,168 --> 00:08:24,499
We are going to
call them,
194
00:08:24,569 --> 00:08:26,662
we are gonna put them on
speakerphone right now,
Oh. Oh.
195
00:08:26,905 --> 00:08:29,567
And we are going to
straighten this out.
196
00:08:29,674 --> 00:08:32,234
Screw corporate!
They probably
stole the idea anyway.
197
00:08:32,410 --> 00:08:33,843
MICHAEL:
Mmm-hmm.
Uh.
198
00:08:33,979 --> 00:08:35,071
Corporate stole nothing. Okay?
199
00:08:35,146 --> 00:08:36,670
Darryl brought this
idea to me.
200
00:08:36,815 --> 00:08:39,249
And then I told them,
giving Darryl full credit. So,
201
00:08:39,551 --> 00:08:41,246
no need to
"screw corporate."
202
00:08:41,519 --> 00:08:44,113
Everyone, let's give Darryl
a round of applause
as planned.
203
00:08:49,527 --> 00:08:51,119
I'm a little peeved
at Darryl right now.
204
00:08:51,196 --> 00:08:52,754
He went to Gabe
behind your back!
205
00:08:52,864 --> 00:08:55,458
No, he didn't
go behind my back.
He went over my head.
206
00:08:55,533 --> 00:08:57,933
He went over your head
to go behind your back.
207
00:08:58,670 --> 00:09:00,228
What is taking
someone from behind?
208
00:09:00,305 --> 00:09:01,567
No. Shh.
Michael, listen.
209
00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:04,108
This cannot stand.
You can't have workers
going straight to corporate.
210
00:09:04,175 --> 00:09:05,369
It makes your
job superfluous.
211
00:09:05,443 --> 00:09:06,808
It was a good idea, though.
212
00:09:06,911 --> 00:09:10,711
Yeah,
here's another good idea,
corporate chain of command.
213
00:09:11,549 --> 00:09:15,178
We need to
strangle Darryl's idea.
214
00:09:15,987 --> 00:09:17,249
Hey, Danny.
Hey.
215
00:09:18,056 --> 00:09:20,581
I'm really sorry,
but we can't come to
your party tonight.
216
00:09:20,692 --> 00:09:22,717
I was looking forward
to throwing some
darts with you guys.
217
00:09:22,927 --> 00:09:23,985
You were?
Okay, well then...
218
00:09:24,062 --> 00:09:27,554
I mean, maybe we
could do it like,
next Halloween?
219
00:09:27,766 --> 00:09:28,755
For sure.
We're just, like,
220
00:09:29,034 --> 00:09:30,467
totally caught in
the middle here.
221
00:09:30,535 --> 00:09:31,661
What are you
talking about?
222
00:09:32,103 --> 00:09:34,731
Well, Jim and Pam
basically begged us
not to go.
223
00:09:35,006 --> 00:09:36,667
Jim and Pam really
don't want you to go?
224
00:09:37,108 --> 00:09:40,168
They're really upset about
the whole Danny situation.
225
00:09:40,278 --> 00:09:41,438
I'll talk to 'em.
226
00:09:41,513 --> 00:09:45,005
Yeah, but do you know what?
Don't tell them that
we said anything to you.
227
00:09:45,850 --> 00:09:46,874
Okay.
228
00:09:46,951 --> 00:09:48,316
Okay? Or you're dead.
229
00:09:48,420 --> 00:09:49,409
Okay.
230
00:09:49,521 --> 00:09:50,510
Okay.
231
00:09:52,857 --> 00:09:55,417
Kelly!
Great costume.
232
00:09:56,394 --> 00:10:00,228
Kelly!
You cannot change costumes
in the middle of the day!
233
00:10:00,331 --> 00:10:01,423
Pam, she's out.
234
00:10:02,067 --> 00:10:05,298
If I'm out, I'm gonna
sue this entire company
for discrimination.
235
00:10:05,403 --> 00:10:07,928
Guys, you're arguing over
a one-in-sixteen chance,
236
00:10:08,073 --> 00:10:10,564
over a prize worth $40.
237
00:10:10,809 --> 00:10:12,242
Fifteen thousand
bucks, Oscar.
238
00:10:12,310 --> 00:10:13,709
Yeah, shut it,
Oscar. Pam?
239
00:10:13,945 --> 00:10:15,469
This is an amazing prize.
240
00:10:15,547 --> 00:10:17,538
I mean, I don't even wanna
give Pam a compliment,
241
00:10:17,615 --> 00:10:21,142
'cause she's so, ugh...
But she did a good job.
242
00:10:21,219 --> 00:10:22,311
I really want
that coupon book.
243
00:10:22,821 --> 00:10:24,948
Garbage magnet.
Garbage magnet.
244
00:10:25,056 --> 00:10:27,217
God! Magnets are
interesting enough,
245
00:10:27,292 --> 00:10:30,318
you don't need to
tart 'em up
with some design.
246
00:10:30,462 --> 00:10:33,590
I can't believe this
doesn't make you mad.
247
00:10:33,698 --> 00:10:35,131
What the hell are
they talking about?
248
00:10:35,533 --> 00:10:39,299
Hmm. Kevin and Gabe?
Probably about the extremes
of the human physique.
249
00:10:39,404 --> 00:10:41,133
Do you think Kevin
is going over my head?
250
00:10:41,272 --> 00:10:44,799
I don't... Oh, my God.
Okay. All right,
all right, all right.
251
00:10:44,876 --> 00:10:47,743
You know what?
That's inappropriate, Kevin.
252
00:10:47,846 --> 00:10:48,870
I am your boss.
253
00:10:48,947 --> 00:10:51,313
And if you have
something to say,
it goes through me,
254
00:10:51,483 --> 00:10:52,745
and then I
take it to Gabe.
255
00:10:53,017 --> 00:10:54,507
Chain of command.
Do you understand?
256
00:10:54,619 --> 00:10:56,348
I am so sorry.
Oh, you're sorry?
257
00:10:56,488 --> 00:10:58,115
I just thought...
What did you
just thought?
258
00:10:58,723 --> 00:11:00,520
Well, Gabe asked me
if there were
259
00:11:00,592 --> 00:11:03,254
any really cool
Lady Gaga moves
260
00:11:03,361 --> 00:11:04,828
that he could do
for the catwalk.
261
00:11:05,530 --> 00:11:07,054
And so, then I told...
262
00:11:07,499 --> 00:11:08,523
All right.
263
00:11:08,633 --> 00:11:10,726
I told him that there
was this one cool move
264
00:11:10,835 --> 00:11:13,065
where she powers down
like a robot.
265
00:11:13,171 --> 00:11:14,160
Okay.
266
00:11:14,239 --> 00:11:16,070
Okay?
But I'm so sorry
that...
267
00:11:16,141 --> 00:11:17,335
All right.
I didn't tell you first.
268
00:11:17,408 --> 00:11:19,535
Well, don't let it
happen again.
269
00:11:19,611 --> 00:11:22,171
You think that I would
let this happen again?
270
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:23,941
No way, Jose!
271
00:11:24,682 --> 00:11:25,740
Um.
272
00:11:27,752 --> 00:11:29,083
you, Gabe.
273
00:11:30,455 --> 00:11:32,980
Can you imagine?
It's just crazy.
274
00:11:33,057 --> 00:11:34,115
JIM: That is crazy.
275
00:11:34,392 --> 00:11:36,451
We would never care
if Andy or Kevin
went to your party.
276
00:11:36,528 --> 00:11:38,621
Look, I'm just glad
we can laugh about it,
277
00:11:38,730 --> 00:11:41,198
because I was a little nervous
about coming to work here,
278
00:11:41,266 --> 00:11:42,699
with, you know,
our history.
279
00:11:42,901 --> 00:11:45,199
Oh, my gosh.
Everyone keeps blowing that
out of proportion.
280
00:11:45,270 --> 00:11:47,329
It's not even a history.
Exactly.
281
00:11:47,438 --> 00:11:50,134
It's not like
you guys had some
long relationship, right?
282
00:11:50,875 --> 00:11:52,001
Big painful breakup
I don't know about?
283
00:11:52,076 --> 00:11:53,168
No!
284
00:11:53,478 --> 00:11:54,706
Two or three dates.
It was two.
285
00:11:55,079 --> 00:11:56,478
Was it two?
I thought it was three.
286
00:11:56,548 --> 00:11:59,278
No, we had plans
for a third,
287
00:11:59,350 --> 00:12:01,841
but then, I don't know,
you never called me back.
So...
288
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,444
Oh! You can't
handle the truth!
289
00:12:03,521 --> 00:12:04,545
290
00:12:04,622 --> 00:12:06,487
Well, that does not
sound like me.
291
00:12:06,558 --> 00:12:08,992
Yeah. It was, though.
That's what happened.
292
00:12:10,061 --> 00:12:11,187
Uh.
293
00:12:12,397 --> 00:12:14,695
Well, great,
I just wanted to make sure
things weren't weird.
294
00:12:14,899 --> 00:12:16,025
Uh-uh.
295
00:12:18,670 --> 00:12:21,161
Okay. This whole
going over my head gate
296
00:12:21,272 --> 00:12:22,705
is making people act weird.
297
00:12:22,941 --> 00:12:24,169
Chain of command
is crumbling.
298
00:12:24,275 --> 00:12:26,368
Do you know
what just happened?
I just made Kevin cry.
299
00:12:26,744 --> 00:12:29,907
And Gabe looks like Lady Gaga.
That's not Halloween.
300
00:12:30,248 --> 00:12:33,342
Halloween should
be a day in which
we honor monsters
301
00:12:33,418 --> 00:12:34,680
and not be mad
at each other.
302
00:12:34,752 --> 00:12:36,481
I'm not mad.
Are you mad?
303
00:12:36,621 --> 00:12:39,089
You went over my head,
and then you lied to my face.
304
00:12:39,157 --> 00:12:41,591
So, my head and my face
have taken a beating.
305
00:12:41,926 --> 00:12:44,451
Well, I'm sorry if it
seems that way to you.
306
00:12:44,596 --> 00:12:45,654
Okay, that might help.
307
00:12:45,730 --> 00:12:47,823
If you said "I'm sorry"
in front of everybody...
308
00:12:47,999 --> 00:12:49,091
Mike.
...in front of me.
309
00:12:49,167 --> 00:12:52,295
You made a bad call
and I fixed it.
310
00:12:52,437 --> 00:12:54,098
So, I'm not apologizing.
311
00:12:54,239 --> 00:12:55,900
So, that's it?
312
00:12:56,341 --> 00:12:57,672
That's it.
Is it?
313
00:12:58,076 --> 00:12:59,134
Yes.
314
00:13:02,714 --> 00:13:03,703
Sookie!
315
00:13:04,148 --> 00:13:05,240
316
00:13:06,484 --> 00:13:08,213
Bill Compton
from True Blood.
317
00:13:08,286 --> 00:13:11,483
How many freaking vampires
am I supposed to
care about these days?
318
00:13:11,890 --> 00:13:13,687
Well, I guess you could say
I'm still in costume.
319
00:13:13,892 --> 00:13:16,554
I'm a rational
"consumer."
320
00:13:17,228 --> 00:13:18,490
Oh. Oh, yeah.
So, it's...
321
00:13:20,698 --> 00:13:22,757
This stupid
coupon booklet.
322
00:13:23,468 --> 00:13:25,493
Have you seen my costume?
I'm a rational "consumer."
323
00:13:25,570 --> 00:13:28,004
Yeah, I heard you
say it to Phyllis.
That's a good line.
324
00:13:28,172 --> 00:13:30,663
Okay, everybody.
After you walk the runway,
325
00:13:30,742 --> 00:13:33,210
everyone has to vote for
who gets the coupon book.
326
00:13:33,278 --> 00:13:34,643
And you can't
vote for yourself.
327
00:13:34,712 --> 00:13:37,146
Pam, can you vote
for other people?
328
00:13:37,215 --> 00:13:40,241
Hey, I gotta get in on this.
Hey, it's cool, man.
329
00:13:40,318 --> 00:13:43,412
I work in the warehouse.
I'm cool!
330
00:13:43,554 --> 00:13:45,351
I'm hip and I'm jive!
331
00:13:45,690 --> 00:13:47,783
But I don't care
about nobody!
332
00:13:48,059 --> 00:13:49,458
Do you know who I am?
333
00:13:49,594 --> 00:13:52,461
Happy Halloween, jerk!
334
00:13:53,698 --> 00:13:54,858
Still don't know
who I am?
335
00:13:55,199 --> 00:13:56,632
I'll give you a hint.
336
00:13:57,001 --> 00:13:58,764
I go over other
people's heads.
337
00:13:58,970 --> 00:14:00,232
Michael, this is
a bad idea.
338
00:14:00,305 --> 00:14:01,499
What's a bad idea?
339
00:14:01,739 --> 00:14:04,606
Dressing up as somebody.
I mean, when has that
ever worked for you?
340
00:14:04,742 --> 00:14:05,731
Never!
341
00:14:06,577 --> 00:14:09,375
Okay, you know what, fine.
I'm not Darryl.
342
00:14:10,081 --> 00:14:11,309
And thank God
I'm not Darryl.
343
00:14:11,482 --> 00:14:13,609
Could you have for once
just let us enjoy a party,
344
00:14:13,685 --> 00:14:15,448
instead of making it
about all your issues?
345
00:14:17,622 --> 00:14:18,987
346
00:14:19,557 --> 00:14:21,047
347
00:14:21,793 --> 00:14:22,953
348
00:14:24,495 --> 00:14:25,723
349
00:14:25,897 --> 00:14:26,886
That's a warrior!
350
00:14:33,438 --> 00:14:36,930
I present to you
the rational "consumer,"
351
00:14:37,475 --> 00:14:38,464
as it were.
352
00:14:46,484 --> 00:14:48,281
TODD: Slow, nice
and slow, honey.
353
00:14:48,353 --> 00:14:49,581
PAM:
Angela as a nurse.
354
00:14:49,687 --> 00:14:51,314
Don't... No,
slow it down.
CREED: There it is.
355
00:14:51,422 --> 00:14:52,446
ANGELA:
I don't like your tone.
356
00:14:52,690 --> 00:14:55,659
Look, they were sold out
of all the other costumes,
okay?
357
00:14:57,495 --> 00:14:59,463
I think we all live
in the real world here.
358
00:14:59,564 --> 00:15:03,056
Let's not pretend
to be unaware of what
sells in this office.
359
00:15:03,201 --> 00:15:04,259
PHYLLIS:
What should we ask?
360
00:15:04,335 --> 00:15:05,893
Hey, can I play?
361
00:15:06,004 --> 00:15:09,599
Why don't you ask if
Darryl is a bad friend
362
00:15:09,707 --> 00:15:11,004
who backstabs
people in the back?
363
00:15:11,476 --> 00:15:14,309
We have one question
to ask the spirit world and
you want us to ask that?
364
00:15:15,013 --> 00:15:16,173
He says no.
365
00:15:16,247 --> 00:15:18,010
Uh, Darryl moved it.
You moved it.
366
00:15:18,182 --> 00:15:19,206
No.
367
00:15:19,283 --> 00:15:20,807
Hey, Dwight, you saw
Darryl move it, right?
368
00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:25,715
Let's just say I saw exactly
what the two of you
wanted me to see.
369
00:15:25,857 --> 00:15:27,848
I know how to
sit on a fence.
370
00:15:27,959 --> 00:15:30,519
Hell, I can even
sleep on a fence.
371
00:15:30,595 --> 00:15:33,826
The trick is to
do it face down with
the post in your mouth.
372
00:15:34,132 --> 00:15:36,327
If you had one word
you would use
to describe Darryl,
373
00:15:36,401 --> 00:15:37,868
what would
that word be?
374
00:15:39,637 --> 00:15:40,695
ERIN: A...
375
00:15:42,173 --> 00:15:43,162
S...
376
00:15:43,808 --> 00:15:44,797
S...
377
00:15:48,146 --> 00:15:49,773
H... No!
378
00:15:50,581 --> 00:15:52,242
Uh. E...
379
00:15:52,850 --> 00:15:53,839
T.
380
00:15:53,985 --> 00:15:55,077
An asset.
381
00:15:55,353 --> 00:15:56,547
382
00:15:58,756 --> 00:15:59,745
That's enough.
383
00:16:03,895 --> 00:16:05,886
I don't think
it's gonna work out
the way you think.
384
00:16:06,297 --> 00:16:07,525
I don't think
you get it.
385
00:16:10,568 --> 00:16:12,035
Hey.
Hey.
386
00:16:12,136 --> 00:16:13,262
This is some party, huh?
387
00:16:13,337 --> 00:16:15,601
When you work hard,
you play hard around here.
388
00:16:15,673 --> 00:16:16,697
Even if you
don't work hard.
389
00:16:16,874 --> 00:16:17,932
390
00:16:19,677 --> 00:16:20,905
Oh, here's something.
391
00:16:20,978 --> 00:16:22,070
Uh.
392
00:16:22,146 --> 00:16:24,944
Why didn't you
ever call Pam back?
393
00:16:25,216 --> 00:16:26,205
Serious?
394
00:16:27,251 --> 00:16:30,243
Yeah. I mean, I'm not saying
that everybody has to
fall in love or anything.
395
00:16:30,354 --> 00:16:31,548
I'm just saying,
but...
To, you know,
396
00:16:31,622 --> 00:16:33,055
to not even
call her back is...
397
00:16:33,124 --> 00:16:35,684
You know what it was?
I think she
gave me her number,
398
00:16:35,760 --> 00:16:37,785
but then, her fours
look like eights and...
399
00:16:37,862 --> 00:16:38,886
Could be.
400
00:16:38,963 --> 00:16:42,364
But you also
called her the second time,
so you had the number right.
401
00:16:42,433 --> 00:16:43,422
TODD: Halpert,
402
00:16:44,001 --> 00:16:45,969
you looking for
someone to bang your wife?
403
00:16:46,104 --> 00:16:47,435
No.
Okay.
404
00:16:48,906 --> 00:16:49,895
You want to know?
405
00:16:50,341 --> 00:16:51,330
406
00:16:51,609 --> 00:16:53,577
I didn't call her back
because she spent
the whole date
407
00:16:53,644 --> 00:16:54,770
talking about you.
408
00:16:55,446 --> 00:16:58,108
She was obviously
in love with you.
409
00:17:00,418 --> 00:17:01,851
Fifty-seven,
fifty-eight...
410
00:17:01,919 --> 00:17:03,546
Wait, wait.
She hasn't moved in a while.
411
00:17:04,122 --> 00:17:05,146
Erin!
412
00:17:05,223 --> 00:17:08,192
Two! I got two!
I ate two whole apples!
413
00:17:08,493 --> 00:17:09,551
414
00:17:12,363 --> 00:17:15,264
I'd remember
talking about Jim.
That wasn't it.
415
00:17:15,366 --> 00:17:17,834
Just tell her
the real reason.
416
00:17:18,269 --> 00:17:20,260
Do you honestly wanna know
why I didn't call her back
417
00:17:20,338 --> 00:17:21,737
on a date
over four years ago?
418
00:17:21,806 --> 00:17:23,034
Hey, she had
a nice time.
419
00:17:23,107 --> 00:17:24,096
It seems rude.
Well...
420
00:17:24,175 --> 00:17:25,802
I did. Yeah,
and it's one
of those things
421
00:17:25,877 --> 00:17:27,435
that's just gonna
keep gnawing at me.
422
00:17:27,845 --> 00:17:30,780
Like, gnaw, gnaw...
"Why? Why didn't he?
I have no idea why."
423
00:17:30,948 --> 00:17:33,576
Okay, honestly,
I didn't call you back
424
00:17:33,684 --> 00:17:35,914
because I just thought
you seemed a little
425
00:17:35,987 --> 00:17:37,011
dorky.
426
00:17:40,224 --> 00:17:41,623
Hey, man...
Thank you!
427
00:17:41,692 --> 00:17:44,286
Thank you. I got it.
428
00:17:44,462 --> 00:17:45,929
Now I know.
429
00:17:46,330 --> 00:17:49,299
You thought I was
a little dorky.
You know?
430
00:17:51,102 --> 00:17:56,665
Okay. Well, excuse me.
431
00:17:58,876 --> 00:18:01,401
In the future, you need to get
Michael's approval on anything
432
00:18:01,479 --> 00:18:03,208
before coming to me.
Thank you.
433
00:18:03,281 --> 00:18:05,146
You're gonna miss out
on some good ideas.
434
00:18:05,449 --> 00:18:08,009
Okay, well, obviously if it's
a really, really good idea,
435
00:18:08,085 --> 00:18:09,211
then my door is open.
436
00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:11,845
If they're good ideas,
I'm not gonna say, "No."
437
00:18:11,989 --> 00:18:13,013
You said, "No"
to this one.
438
00:18:13,090 --> 00:18:15,524
That's... Okay, I make
one mistake in 15 years
439
00:18:15,593 --> 00:18:17,117
and you drag me
over the coals.
440
00:18:17,261 --> 00:18:18,319
After everything
I did for you?
441
00:18:18,396 --> 00:18:19,385
What have you
done for me?
442
00:18:19,664 --> 00:18:21,495
Oh, well...
What have you
done for me?
443
00:18:21,632 --> 00:18:23,566
Ed Truck hired me.
444
00:18:23,634 --> 00:18:25,067
Jo promoted me.
445
00:18:25,136 --> 00:18:28,537
Gabe listened to me.
All you've ever done
was say, "No" to me.
446
00:18:31,242 --> 00:18:33,267
I have ambition,
447
00:18:33,344 --> 00:18:35,278
and you kept me
at the same level
for years.
448
00:18:36,347 --> 00:18:37,678
Dropping bombs, right?
449
00:18:38,182 --> 00:18:39,274
450
00:18:39,684 --> 00:18:40,776
This really make
you think, Michael?
451
00:18:40,851 --> 00:18:43,411
Stop it. Stop. Stop.
We're thinking.
452
00:18:44,522 --> 00:18:45,989
We're thinking about it.
GABE: Yeah.
453
00:18:46,057 --> 00:18:48,355
You don't have to
point to the fact that
we're thinking about it.
454
00:18:48,459 --> 00:18:50,017
Stop it.
Just let us think.
455
00:18:51,896 --> 00:18:55,229
Okay, next time you
have a really great idea,
456
00:18:55,299 --> 00:18:57,267
we will put it in a hat,
457
00:18:58,035 --> 00:19:00,833
and then we will have Erin
pick it out of the hat
and let her decide.
458
00:19:00,905 --> 00:19:02,304
I don't understand
the point of a hat.
459
00:19:03,241 --> 00:19:04,401
You're right,
we don't need a hat.
460
00:19:04,475 --> 00:19:06,170
I am not budging
on the hat issue.
461
00:19:06,277 --> 00:19:08,802
Okay, we're gonna
table the hat question.
462
00:19:08,913 --> 00:19:10,346
The best ideas are
gonna come to me.
463
00:19:10,414 --> 00:19:12,712
I make the
final decision,
period.
464
00:19:13,317 --> 00:19:17,117
Okay, we both reserve
the right to go to Jo
if we disagree with Gabe.
465
00:19:18,055 --> 00:19:19,147
Okay.
DARRYL: Fair enough.
466
00:19:19,423 --> 00:19:22,221
Why don't we simplify this?
Darryl brings it to Michael,
467
00:19:22,326 --> 00:19:24,988
Michael brings it to me,
no one calls Jo.
468
00:19:26,764 --> 00:19:28,561
Unless you and I
decide we wanna talk to Jo,
469
00:19:28,633 --> 00:19:29,691
then we'll give her a call.
470
00:19:30,334 --> 00:19:31,358
Cool.
471
00:19:31,435 --> 00:19:33,335
Hey, sorry I left.
472
00:19:33,437 --> 00:19:35,598
I'm sorry I was a jerk.
473
00:19:37,341 --> 00:19:38,672
MICHAEL: Friends fight.
474
00:19:39,844 --> 00:19:40,970
Friends fight.
475
00:19:41,178 --> 00:19:42,167
What's up, man?
476
00:19:42,713 --> 00:19:44,044
Sometimes it seems
like it was better
477
00:19:44,115 --> 00:19:45,377
down in the warehouse,
you know?
478
00:19:45,449 --> 00:19:47,212
When I was
a freshman in college,
479
00:19:47,285 --> 00:19:49,276
I worked at
the student newspaper,
480
00:19:49,353 --> 00:19:51,480
the Cornell Daily Sun.
This was at Cornell.
481
00:19:51,555 --> 00:19:54,854
I had to write
an op-ed column every day,
"Bernard's Regards."
482
00:19:55,393 --> 00:19:56,724
This was your
freshman year?
483
00:19:57,094 --> 00:20:00,154
I started to ask myself,
do I have big plans here?
484
00:20:00,564 --> 00:20:03,089
I didn't wanna become
editor of that paper, so
485
00:20:03,401 --> 00:20:05,733
I got up
and walked right out
of Walter Bernard Hall,
486
00:20:06,103 --> 00:20:07,934
and that's actually
when I heard
487
00:20:08,239 --> 00:20:10,139
eight male voices
488
00:20:10,207 --> 00:20:11,504
singing,
489
00:20:12,243 --> 00:20:14,177
unencumbered
by instruments.
490
00:20:15,079 --> 00:20:16,103
I was hooked.
491
00:20:16,180 --> 00:20:20,241
So, is becoming
CEO of this company
492
00:20:22,653 --> 00:20:23,847
your a cappella group?
493
00:20:25,556 --> 00:20:27,581
Come on. We're going to
Danny's bar, Public School.
494
00:20:27,725 --> 00:20:29,488
No, I got
some work to do.
495
00:20:29,927 --> 00:20:32,122
I do have big plans
at this company.
496
00:20:32,897 --> 00:20:34,558
ERIN: She...
It was fantastic.
Yeah.
497
00:20:34,632 --> 00:20:36,156
It was like
a little gentle...
498
00:20:37,568 --> 00:20:40,059
JIM: To be honest,
I still can't believehe didn't call her back.
499
00:20:41,405 --> 00:20:44,101
Who doesn't call
a dork like that back?
500
00:20:46,310 --> 00:20:48,141
Oh! Wow!
501
00:20:48,312 --> 00:20:49,574
Spinach in a can!
502
00:20:49,647 --> 00:20:50,978
Power from spinach!
503
00:20:51,082 --> 00:20:52,140
Ag, ag, ag, ag, ag, ag!
504
00:20:52,216 --> 00:20:53,410
Oh, my hero!
505
00:20:58,389 --> 00:21:01,187
PAM: Okay, everyone,
I've tallied the votes,
and the winner
506
00:21:01,692 --> 00:21:03,887
of the Costume
Celebration Spectacular
507
00:21:03,961 --> 00:21:05,986
and the Scranton-Wilkes-Barre
coupon book,
508
00:21:06,063 --> 00:21:07,223
Oscar Martinez.
509
00:21:08,666 --> 00:21:09,655
PHYLLIS: Who?
510
00:21:13,003 --> 00:21:14,436
If I have to vote
for someone,
511
00:21:14,505 --> 00:21:16,700
I don't want it
to be someone
who can beat me.
512
00:21:17,742 --> 00:21:20,472
Shake things up.
I'm a Nader guy.
513
00:21:21,379 --> 00:21:25,315
Best Edward James Olmos
costume I've ever seen.
514
00:21:26,384 --> 00:21:28,045
Like, freaky good.
37917
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