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1
00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,980
Hey, you got a permit
for those guns?
2
00:00:17,050 --> 00:00:18,950
I got your permit right here.
3
00:00:30,070 --> 00:00:31,500
Catchy tune.
4
00:00:38,840 --> 00:00:41,340
Fuck this game.
5
00:00:41,440 --> 00:00:43,380
FUCK YOU!
6
00:01:18,050 --> 00:01:21,580
We need backup,
we need Kung Fury.
7
00:01:37,370 --> 00:01:39,600
Yeah, that's my bicep.
8
00:01:41,040 --> 00:01:42,240
One second babe.
9
00:01:43,040 --> 00:01:44,910
Hello?
10
00:01:45,010 --> 00:01:47,140
We got an arcade machine
down here going crazy,
11
00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:48,340
it is killing everybody,
it's destruction,
chaos, terror-
12
00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:51,380
What are you gonna do?
13
00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:52,580
My job.
14
00:02:59,920 --> 00:03:01,580
Game over.
15
00:03:07,460 --> 00:03:11,260
I'm a cop and
damn good at my job.
16
00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:13,460
It all began years ago.
17
00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:14,930
In the line of duty,
18
00:03:15,030 --> 00:03:16,300
me and my partner were
chasing down
19
00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:19,730
a mysterious Kung Fu-master.
20
00:03:19,830 --> 00:03:21,340
You're under arrest, punk.
21
00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:22,700
Show us your hands.
22
00:03:24,670 --> 00:03:26,140
Good work, Dragon.
23
00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:28,280
That crazy stunt could've
killed us both.
24
00:03:28,380 --> 00:03:30,810
But goddammit, you're the
best partner I've ever had.
25
00:03:30,910 --> 00:03:34,280
Thanks,
I learned from the best.
26
00:03:34,380 --> 00:03:36,420
You're like a father to me.
27
00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:39,250
With one fatal blow,
he hit my partner.
28
00:03:41,260 --> 00:03:43,460
I could tell
he was dead straight off.
29
00:03:49,700 --> 00:03:52,570
Before I could pull the trigger
30
00:03:52,670 --> 00:03:56,170
I was hit by lightning
and bitten by a cobra.
31
00:03:56,270 --> 00:03:58,440
I blacked out.
32
00:04:01,010 --> 00:04:04,210
And saw images of ancient
Shaolin temples and monks,
33
00:04:04,310 --> 00:04:06,510
mastering the art of Kung Fu.
34
00:04:06,610 --> 00:04:08,050
There was an ancient prophecy,
35
00:04:08,150 --> 00:04:10,550
about a new form
of Kung Fu so powerful,
36
00:04:10,650 --> 00:04:12,720
only one man could master it.
37
00:04:12,820 --> 00:04:14,060
The chosen one.
38
00:04:16,060 --> 00:04:17,630
When I woke up,
39
00:04:17,730 --> 00:04:19,960
I saw the Kung Fu master
running towards me.
40
00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:22,030
I could feel my body mutate
41
00:04:22,130 --> 00:04:25,100
into some sort of
Kung Fu freak of nature.
42
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:37,750
You!
43
00:04:38,650 --> 00:04:40,050
You are the chosen one!
44
00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:44,120
- Knock, knock.
- Who's there?
45
00:04:45,150 --> 00:04:46,760
Knuckles.
46
00:05:07,380 --> 00:05:09,140
As a memento,
47
00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:12,010
I put on a strip of cloth
from the dead Kung Fu master.
48
00:05:12,110 --> 00:05:14,720
I decided I would use
my new super Kung Fu powers
49
00:05:14,820 --> 00:05:16,280
to fight crime.
50
00:05:16,380 --> 00:05:18,150
So, I became
the best cop in the world.
51
00:05:18,250 --> 00:05:20,820
I became, Kung Fury.
52
00:06:12,340 --> 00:06:14,180
I don't wanna hear it Kung Fury.
53
00:06:14,280 --> 00:06:17,880
I just got back from city hall,
$50 million worth of damages,
54
00:06:17,980 --> 00:06:21,280
and I got the mayor up
my ass like a fag on Viagra.
55
00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:25,120
How am I going to explain
this to the press, hm?
56
00:06:25,220 --> 00:06:28,860
You just destroyed an entire
city block for Christ's sake.
57
00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:30,760
Didn't you tell me
to block it out?
58
00:06:30,860 --> 00:06:32,430
I told you do it by the book.
59
00:06:32,530 --> 00:06:33,830
Cut the bullshit.
60
00:06:33,930 --> 00:06:35,230
Nobody else could have stopped
61
00:06:35,330 --> 00:06:37,300
that arcade machine
and you know it.
62
00:06:39,330 --> 00:06:42,400
Oh man, listen to me Kung Fury.
63
00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:46,010
You need to start following
the rules like the rest of us,
64
00:06:46,110 --> 00:06:48,110
so I'm assigning you
a new partner.
65
00:06:48,210 --> 00:06:50,250
What?
Hell no, I work alone.
66
00:06:50,350 --> 00:06:51,810
Not anymore you don't.
67
00:06:51,910 --> 00:06:55,520
Say hi to your new partner,
Triceracop.
68
00:06:55,620 --> 00:06:57,590
Very nice meeting you Kung Fury,
69
00:06:57,690 --> 00:07:00,050
looking forward to
working with you.
70
00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:02,160
You're like a father to me.
71
00:07:04,730 --> 00:07:06,490
I work alone.
72
00:07:06,590 --> 00:07:08,830
Either you team up
with Triceracop,
73
00:07:08,930 --> 00:07:10,670
or you're off the case.
74
00:07:10,770 --> 00:07:12,300
I'm not off the case,
75
00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:13,440
I quit.
76
00:07:24,580 --> 00:07:27,680
Yeah Yeah, I did the blood test.
77
00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:29,480
It was positive, yeah?
78
00:07:29,580 --> 00:07:30,590
What the hell
are you talking about?
79
00:07:30,690 --> 00:07:32,390
Yeah no problem.
80
00:07:32,490 --> 00:07:33,620
Give me the phone.
81
00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:42,360
What the hell is this?
82
00:07:44,370 --> 00:07:48,070
- Chief McNickles speaking.
- Is this the police?
83
00:07:48,170 --> 00:07:50,610
- Yeah, this is the police.
- Fuck you!
84
00:08:06,350 --> 00:08:08,020
MALFUNCTIONING?
85
00:08:09,260 --> 00:08:11,760
I need someone
to trace that call!
86
00:08:11,860 --> 00:08:13,730
But that's impossible!
87
00:08:13,830 --> 00:08:15,230
Not for me it isn't.
88
00:08:22,540 --> 00:08:25,410
Hackerman, he's the most
powerful hacker of all time.
89
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:30,310
Follow me.
90
00:08:33,580 --> 00:08:35,820
I was able to triangulate
the cell phone signal
91
00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:37,190
and trace the caller.
92
00:08:38,620 --> 00:08:40,790
His name is Adolf Hitler.
93
00:08:40,890 --> 00:08:44,060
Hitler, he's the worst
criminal of all time.
94
00:08:44,160 --> 00:08:45,590
Do you know him, sir?
95
00:08:45,690 --> 00:08:47,130
I guess you could say that.
96
00:08:47,230 --> 00:08:50,930
In the 1940's,
Hitler was a Kung Fu champion.
97
00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:52,800
He was so good at Kung Fu,
98
00:08:52,900 --> 00:08:56,470
that he decided to change
his name to Kung Führer.
99
00:08:57,570 --> 00:08:59,040
But he didn't stop there.
100
00:08:59,140 --> 00:09:01,110
He knew of
the Kung Fury prophecy,
101
00:09:01,210 --> 00:09:02,940
and wanted to claim the throne.
102
00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:05,180
He and his posse of
Nazi soldiers
103
00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:07,080
conducted experiments
for years.
104
00:09:18,290 --> 00:09:19,890
But they weren't able
to figure out
105
00:09:19,990 --> 00:09:22,500
how to master the art
of Kung Fury.
106
00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,070
And one day,
107
00:09:25,170 --> 00:09:27,330
he disappeared
from the face of the earth.
108
00:09:27,430 --> 00:09:29,670
And no-one has seen him
ever since.
109
00:09:29,770 --> 00:09:31,470
Until now.
110
00:09:31,570 --> 00:09:34,410
I guess he figured if he could
find and kill the chosen one,
111
00:09:34,510 --> 00:09:36,480
he would become
Kung Fury himself.
112
00:09:36,580 --> 00:09:39,050
He must have traveled in time
in order to get here,
113
00:09:39,150 --> 00:09:41,850
that's probably why
he disappeared.
114
00:09:41,950 --> 00:09:43,320
So, what're you gonna do?
115
00:09:43,850 --> 00:09:45,220
My job.
116
00:09:45,320 --> 00:09:47,690
I'm gonna go back in time
to Nazi Germany,
117
00:09:47,790 --> 00:09:49,590
and kill Hitler,
once and for all.
118
00:09:49,690 --> 00:09:51,790
So, how are you gonna do that?
119
00:09:51,890 --> 00:09:53,730
I'm not sure.
120
00:09:53,830 --> 00:09:55,630
I need some sort of
time machine.
121
00:09:59,630 --> 00:10:01,140
Wait a minute,
122
00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:03,200
using an RX modulator,
I might be able to conduct
123
00:10:03,300 --> 00:10:05,970
a mainframe cell direct and
hack the uplink to the download.
124
00:10:06,070 --> 00:10:07,680
What the hell does that mean?
125
00:10:07,780 --> 00:10:10,610
It means, with the right algorithms,
I can hack you back in time.
126
00:10:11,610 --> 00:10:13,650
Just like a time machine.
127
00:10:13,750 --> 00:10:16,150
Well then, it's hacking time.
128
00:12:34,860 --> 00:12:36,760
Fuck!
129
00:12:36,860 --> 00:12:38,490
That's a Laser-Raptor.
130
00:12:38,590 --> 00:12:40,830
I thought they went
extinct thousands of years ago.
131
00:13:05,150 --> 00:13:06,550
Who are you?
132
00:13:06,650 --> 00:13:07,760
My name,
133
00:13:09,120 --> 00:13:10,360
is Barbarianna.
134
00:13:16,900 --> 00:13:18,600
What year is this?
135
00:13:18,700 --> 00:13:20,270
It's the Viking age.
136
00:13:20,370 --> 00:13:22,900
That explains the Laser-Raptor.
Fuck!
137
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,010
I went too far back in time.
138
00:13:25,110 --> 00:13:27,070
You need to get out
of this valley.
139
00:13:27,170 --> 00:13:29,480
This place is swarming
with Laser-Raptors.
140
00:13:29,580 --> 00:13:32,910
I'll meet you at the God's drop.
Katana can help you get there.
141
00:13:33,010 --> 00:13:34,680
Who's Katana?
142
00:13:34,780 --> 00:13:35,920
I'm Katana.
143
00:13:39,520 --> 00:13:41,860
I can give you a ride to Asgard.
144
00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:43,730
A ride on what?
145
00:14:05,810 --> 00:14:08,080
So, who are you?
146
00:14:08,180 --> 00:14:10,990
I'm a cop from the future.
147
00:14:11,090 --> 00:14:13,190
I was sent back in time
to kill Hitler,
148
00:14:13,290 --> 00:14:17,760
but I accidently went
too far back in time
149
00:14:17,860 --> 00:14:19,190
and ended up in this place.
150
00:14:21,730 --> 00:14:24,600
I know someone
who might be able to help you.
151
00:14:28,570 --> 00:14:32,810
Thor!
152
00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:50,360
Behold! It is me, Thor!
153
00:14:50,460 --> 00:14:53,390
Son of Odin
and protector of mankind.
154
00:14:53,490 --> 00:14:55,430
Check out my pecs.
155
00:14:55,530 --> 00:14:56,930
Your pecs are epic.
156
00:14:57,030 --> 00:14:58,400
Thanks bro!
157
00:15:02,870 --> 00:15:05,240
So, anyway.
158
00:15:05,340 --> 00:15:08,810
Thor, this is Kung Fury,
he's a cop from the future.
159
00:15:08,910 --> 00:15:12,450
Yeah, I need to get to
Nazi Germany and kill Hitler...
160
00:15:12,550 --> 00:15:15,020
- so if you could help me with--
- Stop!
161
00:15:17,020 --> 00:15:18,420
Hammer time.
162
00:15:22,260 --> 00:15:27,030
Walk through this portal and
you shall end up in Nazi Germany.
163
00:15:27,130 --> 00:15:29,660
Good luck to you, Kung Fury!
164
00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:30,830
Thanks, Thor!
165
00:15:37,470 --> 00:15:40,310
Well,
looks like this is my ride.
166
00:15:40,410 --> 00:15:43,950
Hey, future cop,
where are you going?
167
00:15:48,350 --> 00:15:51,420
You know what.
Here, take my number.
168
00:15:52,320 --> 00:15:54,560
And use this phone to call me.
169
00:15:54,660 --> 00:15:57,660
It's a personal, transportable,
cellular telephone.
170
00:15:57,760 --> 00:16:01,030
It features 645 channel
capacity,
171
00:16:01,130 --> 00:16:05,370
10 number speed dial,
and an electronic security lock.
172
00:16:05,470 --> 00:16:08,740
This revolution in communication
could make it possible
173
00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:11,940
for more and more people
to have a phone in their car!
174
00:17:30,790 --> 00:17:32,490
Tank you.
175
00:17:40,490 --> 00:17:45,400
I'm the greatest Kung Fu master
of all time,
176
00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:56,480
Thank you!
177
00:18:09,590 --> 00:18:11,430
I'm disarming you.
178
00:18:11,530 --> 00:18:13,590
Mein Arm! Mein A--
179
00:18:27,380 --> 00:18:28,580
Kill him!
180
00:20:00,930 --> 00:20:02,600
You don't need that spine,
181
00:20:04,740 --> 00:20:06,140
it's holding your back!
182
00:20:36,170 --> 00:20:37,300
A-ha!
183
00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:38,810
Fuck you, Kung Fury.
184
00:20:38,910 --> 00:20:42,880
Now nothing can stop me
and my army of death.
185
00:20:55,090 --> 00:20:56,320
Thank you guys!
186
00:21:03,500 --> 00:21:04,930
What the fuck?
187
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:49,940
Kill them!
188
00:22:45,170 --> 00:22:50,470
Alright Hitler, the gig is up,
show me your hands.
189
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:11,390
Hackerman,
have you seen Kung Fury?
190
00:23:13,660 --> 00:23:16,160
Oh, no! We were too late.
191
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:54,600
Who the hell are you?
192
00:23:54,700 --> 00:23:57,810
My name is Cobra.
193
00:23:57,910 --> 00:24:01,540
I've been expecting you
Kung Fury.
194
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:03,880
I'm your spirit animal.
195
00:24:03,980 --> 00:24:05,850
What the hell is this place?
196
00:24:05,950 --> 00:24:10,350
This is heaven,
I'm afraid you're dead.
197
00:24:11,050 --> 00:24:12,550
What?
198
00:24:12,650 --> 00:24:14,960
But it looks so real.
199
00:24:15,060 --> 00:24:19,190
Yeah, no it's totally real.
200
00:24:19,290 --> 00:24:21,430
Mr. Cobra, I'm a police officer.
201
00:24:21,530 --> 00:24:24,900
I need you to send me
back to earth, pronto.
202
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:27,200
I'm sorry,
I can't help you with that.
203
00:24:27,300 --> 00:24:30,000
You see, you're dead.
204
00:24:30,100 --> 00:24:32,340
- You're under arrest!
- What?
205
00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:37,110
For obstruction of justice,
you're breaking the law!
206
00:24:50,860 --> 00:24:52,390
What the hell happened?
207
00:24:52,490 --> 00:24:55,130
I hacked away all of
your bullet wounds Kung Fury.
208
00:24:55,230 --> 00:24:56,460
Thanks!
209
00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:21,690
I want to welcome you
and your friends to Germany.
210
00:25:24,430 --> 00:25:27,100
We are not so different,
you and I.
211
00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:30,600
I mean we both got
good style, you know?
212
00:25:30,700 --> 00:25:32,370
Red, you know?
213
00:25:33,070 --> 00:25:34,340
So, that's cool!
214
00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:38,150
We both like doing moves!
215
00:25:38,150 --> 00:25:38,850
Ja!
216
00:25:38,850 --> 00:25:39,940
Check it out!
217
00:25:39,940 --> 00:25:40,925
Ja!
218
00:25:41,250 --> 00:25:42,040
Ja!
219
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:46,280
And killing people, I love it,
you clearly do, too!
220
00:25:47,180 --> 00:25:48,620
And that's cool!
221
00:25:49,820 --> 00:25:51,250
Join me,
222
00:25:51,350 --> 00:25:54,720
we could be brothers,
we are so alike.
223
00:25:54,820 --> 00:25:57,630
It's almost like
we finish each other's...
224
00:25:57,730 --> 00:25:59,260
- Balls.
- What?
225
00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:24,050
Oh, my,
not much left of him, is there?
226
00:26:24,150 --> 00:26:26,020
The important thing is that
he is gone.
227
00:26:27,420 --> 00:26:29,460
Sorry I doubted you Triceracop.
228
00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:31,490
You're the best damn partner
I've ever had.
229
00:26:31,590 --> 00:26:34,660
I came back in time
for you Kung Fury,
230
00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:37,060
because, damn it,
I love you.
231
00:26:41,100 --> 00:26:44,410
Team work is very important.
232
00:26:45,740 --> 00:26:48,780
So, what happens now Kung Fury?
233
00:26:51,650 --> 00:26:53,920
Well, I need to
head back to the office.
234
00:26:55,780 --> 00:26:58,420
Looks like it's gonna be
hell of a lot of paperwork.
235
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:22,480
Open the doors, Hoff.
236
00:27:22,580 --> 00:27:25,310
I'm sorry Fury,
I can't let you do that.
237
00:27:25,410 --> 00:27:27,120
Open the doors, Hoff!
238
00:27:27,220 --> 00:27:30,420
I'm sorry, I can't let you
open the doors, Kung Fury.
239
00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:32,150
Goddammit, open the doors!
240
00:27:32,250 --> 00:27:35,860
- Sorry I can't--
- Open the doors!
241
00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:41,460
Did anyone ever tell you
not to hassle the Hoff 9000?
242
00:27:41,560 --> 00:27:44,600
Oh, Hoff 9000,
you son of a bitch.
243
00:27:59,150 --> 00:28:01,180
Piece of shit.
244
00:28:17,030 --> 00:28:19,270
Oh, my,
not much left of him, is there?
245
00:28:19,370 --> 00:28:22,740
The important thing is that
he is gone.
246
00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:35,950
Game over.
247
00:28:37,580 --> 00:28:39,020
Wait a minute,
248
00:28:40,620 --> 00:28:42,960
I've seen that symbol before...
249
00:28:45,130 --> 00:28:46,490
somewhere.
250
00:28:55,900 --> 00:28:57,100
Hitler!
17357
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