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1
00:00:03,250 --> 00:00:06,830
Hey, Shawn, I didn't know
you got Chinese food.
2
00:00:08,166 --> 00:00:10,096
Huh.
3
00:00:10,133 --> 00:00:12,153
Ooh, lo mein. My favorite.
4
00:00:14,133 --> 00:00:15,223
Mm-mm.
5
00:00:17,116 --> 00:00:19,146
Hey, Marlon,
have you seen my bait?
6
00:00:25,330 --> 00:00:27,160
[theme song]
7
00:00:28,116 --> 00:00:29,376
♪ We're brothers ♪
8
00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:31,170
♪ We're happy
and we're singing ♪
9
00:00:31,200 --> 00:00:33,500
♪ And we're colored ♪
10
00:00:34,250 --> 00:00:36,280
♪ Give me a high five ♪♪
11
00:00:36,316 --> 00:00:38,656
(male #1)
'Alright. Cut and print!'
12
00:00:38,100 --> 00:00:40,300
'Beautiful, guys.
Dynamite! That..'
13
00:00:40,333 --> 00:00:43,233
♪ Girl what you got
goin' on tonight? ♪
14
00:00:43,266 --> 00:00:46,156
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
15
00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:48,170
♪ Won't you just chill
with me tonight ♪
16
00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:50,280
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
17
00:00:50,316 --> 00:00:53,656
♪ Girl what you got
going on tonight? ♪
18
00:00:53,100 --> 00:00:55,500
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
19
00:00:55,830 --> 00:00:57,370
♪ Won't you just chill
with me tonight ♪
20
00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:59,380
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
21
00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:01,230
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪♪
22
00:01:10,283 --> 00:01:12,273
The customer ordered
this bacon extra
crispy.
23
00:01:12,300 --> 00:01:14,320
Does this look
extra crispy to
you?
24
00:01:14,350 --> 00:01:16,120
[speaking in Chinese]
25
00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:20,830
No, it's not extra crispy.
26
00:01:20,116 --> 00:01:22,116
[speaking in Chinese]
27
00:01:22,150 --> 00:01:25,230
Hey, watch your language.
I'm still the boss around
here.
28
00:01:28,116 --> 00:01:29,296
Here you go, slick.
29
00:01:29,333 --> 00:01:32,283
Excuse me, I believe
I ordered these scrambled.
30
00:01:32,316 --> 00:01:34,196
Oh, lemme take care
of that for you.
31
00:01:42,333 --> 00:01:44,323
- Here you go.
- That's much better. Thanks.
32
00:01:44,350 --> 00:01:47,160
Hey, we aim to please, brother.
33
00:01:49,266 --> 00:01:51,326
- Hey, what's up, Pop?
- Oh, I'm sorry, son.
34
00:01:51,366 --> 00:01:53,156
You gotta take
over.
I gotta go home.
35
00:01:53,500 --> 00:01:54,330
Why? What's wrong?
36
00:01:54,660 --> 00:01:55,150
Your mama and Aunt Lucille
37
00:01:55,183 --> 00:01:56,273
had a big fight again.
38
00:01:56,300 --> 00:01:58,170
Oh, what are those
two big-boned women
39
00:01:58,200 --> 00:01:59,200
fighting about now?
40
00:01:59,233 --> 00:02:00,273
I don't know.
41
00:02:00,300 --> 00:02:01,280
Your Aunt Lucille said that
42
00:02:01,316 --> 00:02:03,326
you were a deadbeat son.
43
00:02:03,366 --> 00:02:06,366
Your mama said
she looked like Barry White.
44
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,280
And it got kind of
nasty after that.
45
00:02:08,316 --> 00:02:10,176
Look, you don't wanna get
involved with that, pop.
46
00:02:10,216 --> 00:02:12,496
Let them have
their little catfight.
47
00:02:12,830 --> 00:02:13,100
Just tell her you're working.
48
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,003
It's not that easy, son.
49
00:02:15,330 --> 00:02:16,170
Let me tell you something
about marriage.
50
00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:18,230
It ain't all romance
and champagne
51
00:02:18,266 --> 00:02:20,276
and bang-bang-bang.
52
00:02:20,316 --> 00:02:23,326
Sometimes you gotta be tender,
holding their hand
53
00:02:23,660 --> 00:02:25,830
lending an ear,
sitting on your mama's stomach
54
00:02:25,116 --> 00:02:27,116
so she can zip up her pants.
55
00:02:28,100 --> 00:02:29,220
Damn, pop, you've changed.
56
00:02:29,250 --> 00:02:31,180
When we was kids,
you never listened to
mom.
57
00:02:31,216 --> 00:02:33,326
You'd just sit on the
couch
in your underwear
58
00:02:33,660 --> 00:02:34,660
drinking beer.
59
00:02:34,100 --> 00:02:36,150
- Yeah, you was my hero.
- Yeah?
60
00:02:36,183 --> 00:02:38,273
Yeah, remember that time
mom won a VCR
61
00:02:38,300 --> 00:02:40,830
and you put your foot down?
62
00:02:40,116 --> 00:02:44,296
You said "Forget about a VHS
because Betamax is the
future."
63
00:02:44,333 --> 00:02:48,153
Then we'd go to the video store
and there'd be nothing to rent.
64
00:02:48,183 --> 00:02:50,283
But it was all good.
You know why, pop?
65
00:02:50,316 --> 00:02:52,146
'Cause you was the boss.
66
00:02:52,183 --> 00:02:55,663
Yeah, yeah, those were the days.
67
00:02:55,100 --> 00:02:57,660
Yeah, I miss the old pop.
68
00:02:57,100 --> 00:03:00,500
You're right.
What's become of me?
69
00:03:00,830 --> 00:03:01,130
What am I gonna do?
70
00:03:01,166 --> 00:03:03,196
Oh, no,
you-you getting soft, pop.
71
00:03:03,233 --> 00:03:04,233
You know,
I was reading this book.
72
00:03:04,266 --> 00:03:06,296
You reading a book?
73
00:03:06,333 --> 00:03:09,503
And in the book it says
that women like a man
74
00:03:09,830 --> 00:03:11,130
to take control, to take charge.
75
00:03:11,166 --> 00:03:13,326
They like a real man, pop.
76
00:03:13,660 --> 00:03:15,130
You're right.
You know what I gotta do?
77
00:03:15,166 --> 00:03:18,156
I gotta go home and tell
your mama that I am the man.
78
00:03:18,500 --> 00:03:20,230
That's right, pop, go in there
and take charge! You the man!
79
00:03:20,266 --> 00:03:21,316
- Yeah.
- You the man!
80
00:03:21,350 --> 00:03:23,330
Who does she think
she is anyway?
81
00:03:23,660 --> 00:03:24,660
Telling me to
stop
what I'm doing
82
00:03:24,100 --> 00:03:25,170
in the middle of the day
83
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:27,230
and come home
and play
nursemaids.
84
00:03:27,266 --> 00:03:29,226
I'm talking about..
85
00:03:29,266 --> 00:03:32,366
"Aunt Lucille said
that Marlon was a deadbeat."
86
00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:35,380
So? Get over it, woman, I have.
87
00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:37,330
Damn, pop!
88
00:03:37,366 --> 00:03:39,176
What did I do
with my damn coat?
89
00:03:39,216 --> 00:03:40,376
[speaking in Chinese]
90
00:03:42,160 --> 00:03:45,500
No, it's not in the closet.
91
00:03:45,830 --> 00:03:46,220
- What's up, baby boy?
- What's up, Shawn?
92
00:03:46,250 --> 00:03:47,330
- How you feelin'?
- Chilling, man.
93
00:03:47,366 --> 00:03:49,176
- Yo, good news.
- What's up?
94
00:03:49,216 --> 00:03:51,376
Lisa's girlfriend Kim
broke up with her
boyfriend.
95
00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:54,000
And she's coming
to our party on
Friday.
96
00:03:54,330 --> 00:03:56,380
Word! You talking about Kim?
Kim with the baby hair?
97
00:03:57,160 --> 00:03:59,180
- Yeah.
- Oh, man, this is phat.
98
00:03:59,216 --> 00:04:01,196
I love a girl that just
broke up with her man.
99
00:04:01,233 --> 00:04:03,253
They feel so lonely
and desperate.
100
00:04:03,283 --> 00:04:05,503
And then they
lower their standards.
101
00:04:05,830 --> 00:04:06,130
And that's where I come in.
102
00:04:06,166 --> 00:04:08,496
Smooth talk.
103
00:04:08,830 --> 00:04:10,130
Well, you don't know nothing
about women, do you?
104
00:04:10,166 --> 00:04:11,346
Well, what are
you
talking about?
105
00:04:11,383 --> 00:04:13,283
I just fixed
mom and pop's marriage
106
00:04:13,316 --> 00:04:14,366
for your information.
107
00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:16,330
What did you do?
108
00:04:16,660 --> 00:04:17,170
Hi, Shawn.
109
00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:18,330
Marlon, you take over.
110
00:04:18,366 --> 00:04:20,216
I'm gonna go home
and set your mama straight.
111
00:04:20,250 --> 00:04:21,330
I'm gonna tell her
who's the boss.
112
00:04:21,366 --> 00:04:23,656
- Yeah!
- And it ain't Tony Danza.
113
00:04:23,100 --> 00:04:24,200
Oh, wait, wait, wait.
Hold on, pop.
114
00:04:24,233 --> 00:04:25,323
Don't, don't, don't go
115
00:04:25,350 --> 00:04:27,330
in there like that.
116
00:04:27,660 --> 00:04:28,280
Don't do that.
You're just gonna make her mad.
117
00:04:28,316 --> 00:04:30,376
Now, you gotta treat
women as an equal.
118
00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:33,170
No, you do not.
119
00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:34,270
Shawn, you might have
my pretty looks
120
00:04:34,300 --> 00:04:37,230
but, obviously,
Marlon's got my brains.
121
00:04:37,266 --> 00:04:40,826
From now on,
the old Pops is back.
122
00:04:40,116 --> 00:04:41,166
I'm gonna go home
and tell your mama
123
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:42,300
there's a new sheriff in town.
124
00:04:42,333 --> 00:04:44,353
He's a bad mamma jamma.
125
00:04:44,383 --> 00:04:46,323
Hee-haw!
126
00:04:46,350 --> 00:04:48,180
Go on, pop!
127
00:04:48,216 --> 00:04:50,096
Hello? No, it's okay.
He's gone now.
128
00:04:50,133 --> 00:04:52,833
I can talk in my regular voice.
129
00:04:59,116 --> 00:05:02,826
Here we go.
Mm, boo-yah, baby!
130
00:05:02,116 --> 00:05:05,126
Seven. One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven.
131
00:05:05,166 --> 00:05:07,326
Boardwalk, baby. I'm buying it.
132
00:05:07,660 --> 00:05:09,160
♪ We're moving on now ♪
133
00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:11,000
♪ To the east side ♪
134
00:05:11,330 --> 00:05:12,280
♪ To the deluxe apartment ♪
135
00:05:12,316 --> 00:05:13,996
♪ In the sky ♪♪
136
00:05:14,330 --> 00:05:17,150
Um, excuse me, Weezy.
I already own it.
137
00:05:17,183 --> 00:05:18,383
You owe me
a hundred twenty
bucks.
138
00:05:19,160 --> 00:05:19,370
Damn!
139
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:21,000
[knocking on door]
140
00:05:21,330 --> 00:05:23,330
Don't touch anything.
141
00:05:25,350 --> 00:05:27,250
- Hey, hey. Hey, pop.
- Hey, Shawn.
142
00:05:27,283 --> 00:05:29,163
What's going on?
What are you doing?
143
00:05:29,500 --> 00:05:30,170
Oh, I just stopped
by
to let you know
144
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,320
how things went
with mama and me.
145
00:05:31,350 --> 00:05:33,270
You told mom that
you was the boss, right?
146
00:05:33,300 --> 00:05:36,160
- Oh, I was a sight to
behold.
- Yeah.
147
00:05:36,500 --> 00:05:37,200
I marched right in there..
148
00:05:37,233 --> 00:05:39,223
...looked at her
in that good eye..
149
00:05:41,133 --> 00:05:44,173
...and said, "Woman, from now on
we're going back to the old way.
150
00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:46,280
'"I'm the man of this house.
I bring home the bacon.'
151
00:05:46,316 --> 00:05:49,496
Now go in the kitchen
and fry me up some fish!"
152
00:05:49,830 --> 00:05:51,660
Yeah, pop.
That's how you do 'em, baby.
153
00:05:51,100 --> 00:05:53,330
And what did ma say?
154
00:05:53,660 --> 00:05:55,500
I don't remember.
155
00:05:55,830 --> 00:05:57,180
When I come to, some stranger
was helping me on the bus.
156
00:06:00,500 --> 00:06:01,370
Hey, pop, what are you doing?
157
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:04,300
What does it look like
I'm doing? Spending the night.
158
00:06:04,333 --> 00:06:07,223
No, Pops, I told you
not to listen to
Marlon.
159
00:06:07,250 --> 00:06:08,350
Hey, don't blame me.
160
00:06:08,383 --> 00:06:10,833
It says right here in the book
161
00:06:10,116 --> 00:06:11,166
that this shouldn't happen.
162
00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:13,660
What book? Give me that.
163
00:06:14,333 --> 00:06:17,183
"How To Get Women
To Sing To Your Tune."
164
00:06:17,216 --> 00:06:19,226
Who wrote this, Ike Turner?
165
00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:22,120
Man, you got problems.
166
00:06:22,150 --> 00:06:23,320
Yeah, that's why I got the book.
167
00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:25,160
It's got pictures
of naked women too.
168
00:06:25,500 --> 00:06:26,200
Hey, you two stop squabbling.
169
00:06:26,233 --> 00:06:28,353
- Pops is in the house.
- Yeah.
170
00:06:28,383 --> 00:06:31,123
This is gonna be great.
Just the three of us.
171
00:06:31,150 --> 00:06:32,320
It's gonna be like
that summer that..
172
00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:34,120
...ma took Aunt Lucille
to Happy Town
173
00:06:34,150 --> 00:06:35,370
'cause she was hearing
those voices, remember?
174
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:37,120
[gibberish]
175
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:40,180
Pop, this is not good, man.
176
00:06:40,216 --> 00:06:42,196
You should be at home with mom,
working things out.
177
00:06:42,233 --> 00:06:45,333
If I go back with your mama,
I'll be in Happy Town.
178
00:06:45,660 --> 00:06:47,220
[gibberish]
179
00:06:47,250 --> 00:06:50,000
Pops, relationships
is all about problem solving.
180
00:06:50,330 --> 00:06:52,270
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marlon, you were right.
181
00:06:52,300 --> 00:06:54,500
- We're gonna have a lot of
fun.
- Yeah.
182
00:06:54,830 --> 00:06:57,180
We're gonna stay up late
and watch Merv Griffin.
183
00:06:57,216 --> 00:07:00,266
Uh, pop, Merv Griffin's
been canceled for years.
184
00:07:00,300 --> 00:07:02,120
(Pops)
'The point is we're gonna
have'
185
00:07:02,150 --> 00:07:06,280
a whole lot of fun
all night long.
186
00:07:06,316 --> 00:07:10,326
- How long, pop?
- All night long.
187
00:07:10,660 --> 00:07:14,000
All night long. Huh.
188
00:07:14,330 --> 00:07:16,300
Is it just my watch
or is it only 9:30?
189
00:07:16,333 --> 00:07:19,183
You know, 9:30 seemed
so much later when we was kids.
190
00:07:20,300 --> 00:07:22,320
Let's just watch some TV.
191
00:07:22,350 --> 00:07:24,160
Cool.
192
00:07:25,333 --> 00:07:29,183
- Ah.
- Ooh, a Jamie Lee Curtis
movie.
193
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:32,196
Wonder how long it's gonna be
before she shows her.. Whoa.
194
00:07:32,233 --> 00:07:33,323
There they go.
195
00:07:33,350 --> 00:07:36,660
I can't sleep
with all this racket in
here.
196
00:07:36,100 --> 00:07:38,280
Hey, is that
a Jamie Lee Curtis movie?
197
00:07:38,316 --> 00:07:41,296
Too bad I've gotta
get up early.
198
00:07:41,333 --> 00:07:42,353
[TV switches off]
199
00:07:42,383 --> 00:07:44,253
'Night, boys.
200
00:07:44,283 --> 00:07:46,283
Wait a minute.
201
00:07:46,316 --> 00:07:48,156
I don't wanna go to bed yet.
202
00:07:48,500 --> 00:07:50,660
You're the one that gave
Pops the great advice.
203
00:07:50,100 --> 00:07:51,330
Now shut up and go to bed.
204
00:07:51,366 --> 00:07:53,826
Piss off.
205
00:07:59,250 --> 00:08:02,830
You ain't sleeping with me
wearing that.
206
00:08:02,116 --> 00:08:05,376
What? Look, first of all,
I'm not sleeping with you.
207
00:08:06,160 --> 00:08:08,830
I'm just sleeping
in the same bed as you.
208
00:08:08,116 --> 00:08:11,496
Let's get that straight
right now, okay?
209
00:08:11,830 --> 00:08:13,830
Besides, this is how
I always sleep..
210
00:08:13,116 --> 00:08:14,266
...until I get hot.
211
00:08:14,300 --> 00:08:16,160
Yeah, if you get hot near me
212
00:08:16,500 --> 00:08:17,370
you ain't never waking up.
213
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:20,230
- Fool yourself if you want
to.
- Alright.
214
00:08:29,150 --> 00:08:32,280
Damn, your ass is freezing.
215
00:08:32,316 --> 00:08:34,326
Get off me and shut up.
216
00:08:34,366 --> 00:08:36,326
Don't tell me to shut up?
You shut up.
217
00:08:36,660 --> 00:08:37,280
- You shut up.
- You shut up, cold ass.
218
00:08:37,316 --> 00:08:38,996
- You shut up.
- You shut up!
219
00:08:39,330 --> 00:08:41,330
(Pops)
'Both y'all shut up in
there!'
220
00:08:41,660 --> 00:08:44,220
- Sorry, Pops.
- That was Shawn talking,
Pops!
221
00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:48,230
- Okay. Hi.
- Alright. It's okay.
222
00:08:48,266 --> 00:08:49,276
Payback.
223
00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:00,500
- Goodnight, Shawn.
- Go to hell.
224
00:09:11,660 --> 00:09:13,330
[snoring]
225
00:09:39,183 --> 00:09:41,173
[gasping]
226
00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:43,280
What are you trying to do?
Give me brain damage?
227
00:09:44,366 --> 00:09:46,116
Too late.
228
00:09:46,150 --> 00:09:47,370
I've been doing that
since you was five years old.
229
00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:49,380
Well, it ain't funny. You
think
you're funny? You ain't--
230
00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:52,000
(Pops)
'Hey, I want it
quiet in there!'
231
00:09:52,330 --> 00:09:53,330
'Don't make me get up!'
232
00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:57,300
If you can get up,
greasy old man.
233
00:10:02,133 --> 00:10:05,283
"Don't make me get up!
Don't make me get up!"
234
00:10:05,316 --> 00:10:07,246
[indistinct chatter]
235
00:10:09,216 --> 00:10:12,226
Yeah, he's real tough for a
guy
that got kicked in the head
236
00:10:12,266 --> 00:10:14,296
by a lady
wearing bunny
slippers.
237
00:10:17,830 --> 00:10:19,830
Look at me, look at me, Shawn.
238
00:10:21,330 --> 00:10:23,250
I'm Pops.
239
00:10:23,283 --> 00:10:25,273
"Woman, there's
a new sheriff in town
240
00:10:25,300 --> 00:10:28,330
and he's a bad mamma jamma."
241
00:10:28,660 --> 00:10:29,350
Bang! Bang! Bang!
242
00:10:34,500 --> 00:10:35,180
Bang!
243
00:10:35,216 --> 00:10:37,246
And I'm mom.
Here's a
concussion.
244
00:10:37,283 --> 00:10:39,163
Ugh!
245
00:10:41,116 --> 00:10:43,146
- You're gonna die!
- You're gonna die!
246
00:10:43,183 --> 00:10:45,163
(Pop)
'Don't make me get my belt!'
247
00:10:45,500 --> 00:10:47,100
'Hey, hey.'
248
00:10:47,133 --> 00:10:48,283
Sorry, Pops.
249
00:10:51,100 --> 00:10:52,250
Goodnight, papa.
250
00:10:58,500 --> 00:11:00,330
Goodnight, father.
251
00:11:02,116 --> 00:11:03,216
You are a suck up.
252
00:11:03,250 --> 00:11:06,160
You suck up. "Papa."
253
00:11:09,316 --> 00:11:11,346
Goodnight, Marl.
254
00:11:11,383 --> 00:11:13,303
Goodnight, Shawn.
255
00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:17,273
Shawn?
256
00:11:19,166 --> 00:11:21,146
Are you asleep?
257
00:11:23,266 --> 00:11:24,316
You're gonna die!
258
00:11:24,350 --> 00:11:27,100
You're gonna die!
259
00:11:27,133 --> 00:11:29,173
(Pops)
'Alright, that's it!'
260
00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:43,223
Alright, then.
261
00:11:50,266 --> 00:11:53,656
- You're gonna die!
- You're gonna die!
262
00:11:59,350 --> 00:12:01,120
Come here!
263
00:12:01,150 --> 00:12:03,130
Don't do this, Daddy!
264
00:12:07,233 --> 00:12:09,833
You're gonna die!
265
00:12:13,333 --> 00:12:15,203
It's 6:15. Where's your brother?
266
00:12:15,233 --> 00:12:17,233
It's the third night in a
row
he's been late for supper.
267
00:12:17,266 --> 00:12:19,096
I got home early today, pop.
268
00:12:19,133 --> 00:12:20,383
Good boy, Marlon.
269
00:12:22,133 --> 00:12:25,183
Where have you been?
Lollygagging?
270
00:12:25,216 --> 00:12:27,376
You're half an hour late.
Now just wash up for supper.
271
00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:29,380
I told you, pop.
I'm not eating dinner.
272
00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:32,100
- I'm going out with Lisa.
- This is family night.
273
00:12:32,133 --> 00:12:33,233
You ain't going nowhere.
274
00:12:33,266 --> 00:12:34,266
You better call
your little friend
275
00:12:34,300 --> 00:12:36,120
and tell her you can't make it.
276
00:12:36,150 --> 00:12:37,380
Yeah, Shawn, you know
every Wednesday night
277
00:12:38,160 --> 00:12:39,250
is always family night.
278
00:12:39,283 --> 00:12:41,203
What do you mean
"Always family night?"
279
00:12:41,233 --> 00:12:43,133
He's only been here three days.
280
00:12:43,166 --> 00:12:45,656
Just seems like a freaking year.
281
00:12:45,100 --> 00:12:47,170
Alright. Come on.
Let's eat, everybody.
282
00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:49,200
Marlon, you wash your hands?
283
00:12:49,233 --> 00:12:52,103
- Yes, pop.
- Let me see.
284
00:12:52,133 --> 00:12:53,253
Turn them over.
285
00:12:53,283 --> 00:12:55,283
- Good job, Marlon.
- Thanks, pop.
286
00:12:55,316 --> 00:12:57,316
Alright, let's just
hurry up
and eat please.
287
00:12:57,350 --> 00:13:00,270
Hey, hey, hey,
this is a Christian house,
boy.
288
00:13:00,300 --> 00:13:04,660
Christians eat too.
Look how big Al Sharpton is.
289
00:13:05,250 --> 00:13:07,160
Bow your heads.
290
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:09,270
Father, we thank you for
blessing us with this bounty.
291
00:13:09,300 --> 00:13:11,230
Thank you for the peas, father.
292
00:13:11,266 --> 00:13:12,996
Thank you for the chicken.
293
00:13:13,330 --> 00:13:15,220
Thank you for
the Stove Top stuffing.
294
00:13:15,250 --> 00:13:17,320
And, father, thank you
for giving us healthy teeth
295
00:13:17,350 --> 00:13:19,320
to eat all this good food.
296
00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:23,826
Amen.
297
00:13:23,116 --> 00:13:25,096
- Amen.
- Amen.
298
00:13:34,100 --> 00:13:36,830
[telephone ringing]
299
00:13:36,116 --> 00:13:37,376
Who's that calling
during dinner?
300
00:13:38,160 --> 00:13:39,200
Better not be one
of your friends.
301
00:13:39,233 --> 00:13:42,233
- I don't have any friends,
pop.
- Good boy, Marlon.
302
00:13:43,383 --> 00:13:46,173
Hello? Just hold on.
303
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:49,500
It's your mama. I'm gonna take
it in the other room.
304
00:13:49,830 --> 00:13:51,100
Thank God.
Now maybe he'll go home.
305
00:13:51,133 --> 00:13:53,163
Come on, Shawn,
it ain't been that bad.
306
00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:55,270
Oh, no? He treats us
like we're five years
old.
307
00:13:55,300 --> 00:13:58,370
He makes us make our own bed,
he times our phone calls.
308
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,270
And last night,
I didn't get any dessert
309
00:14:00,300 --> 00:14:02,120
because I didn't finish
my broccoli.
310
00:14:02,150 --> 00:14:05,280
Why don't you just do
what I do?
311
00:14:05,316 --> 00:14:08,366
Put the broccoli in your
pocket.
Wouldn't know a thing.
312
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,230
You just don't get it, do you?
313
00:14:10,266 --> 00:14:13,266
We shouldn't have to
go through this, man.
314
00:14:13,300 --> 00:14:14,380
We're grown men.
315
00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:17,100
You believe last night
he gave me a curfew?
316
00:14:17,133 --> 00:14:19,133
Well, you were out till 11:00.
317
00:14:19,166 --> 00:14:24,326
- I think 10:30 is very
fair.
- Oh, okay.
318
00:14:24,660 --> 00:14:26,120
We'll see how fair you think it
is tomorrow night at our party
319
00:14:26,150 --> 00:14:27,380
when you're sitting
on the couch with Kim
320
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:30,230
and pop is sitting in between
you watching "Matlock."
321
00:14:32,500 --> 00:14:33,370
Yeah, you right, we gotta get
that old man out of here
322
00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:37,500
before the party
tomorrow night.
323
00:14:37,830 --> 00:14:40,000
I told you your mother
would call the Mack.
324
00:14:40,330 --> 00:14:41,250
Player!
So you going home, eh?
325
00:14:41,283 --> 00:14:42,323
Hell, no.
326
00:14:42,350 --> 00:14:44,230
Your mama want me back,
but not on my terms.
327
00:14:44,266 --> 00:14:45,346
So I'm gonna stay here
a little longer
328
00:14:45,383 --> 00:14:47,223
and let her stew in her juices.
329
00:14:47,250 --> 00:14:49,320
Well, what exactly
are your terms, pop?
330
00:14:49,350 --> 00:14:52,330
Yeah, and what exactly
are her juices?
331
00:14:54,830 --> 00:14:55,120
My terms are simple.
332
00:14:55,150 --> 00:14:57,250
First, she's gotta
say the words
333
00:14:57,283 --> 00:14:59,303
"You are the king."
334
00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:02,503
After that, I really don't
care
what she does.
335
00:15:02,830 --> 00:15:04,270
- When are you leaving?
- I don't know.
336
00:15:04,300 --> 00:15:07,280
I don't care.
I may never leave.
337
00:15:07,316 --> 00:15:09,176
- Never?
-Never.
338
00:15:09,216 --> 00:15:11,126
So let the party begin.
339
00:15:11,166 --> 00:15:13,656
Oh, man!
340
00:15:17,660 --> 00:15:18,370
Man, this is messed up.
341
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:20,230
This is supposed
to be our party,
man.
342
00:15:20,266 --> 00:15:22,296
Pop promised me
he was gonna stay in his
room.
343
00:15:22,333 --> 00:15:25,153
Uh, don't worry about him.
Nobody's gonna notice him.
344
00:15:25,183 --> 00:15:27,283
♪ Burn baby burn ♪
345
00:15:27,316 --> 00:15:29,116
♪ Disco inferno ♪
346
00:15:29,150 --> 00:15:31,660
♪ Burn baby burn ♪
347
00:15:31,100 --> 00:15:33,270
♪ Burn this mother down ♪♪
348
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:36,660
I can't believe Kim and Lisa
are dancing with him.
349
00:15:36,100 --> 00:15:38,220
I can't believe
he invited
Benny.
350
00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:43,296
Would you look at Pops?
He's ruining our party, Shawn.
351
00:15:43,333 --> 00:15:45,223
Maybe if he keeps dancing
he'll have a stroke
352
00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:48,100
and we could put him out
on the fire escape.
353
00:15:48,133 --> 00:15:49,133
That's a good idea.
354
00:15:49,166 --> 00:15:50,996
- Go, Pops!
- Go, Pops!
355
00:15:51,330 --> 00:15:53,200
(both)
Happy birthday!
Have a stroke now! Go, Pops!
356
00:15:53,233 --> 00:15:55,333
Hey, boys, great funky party.
357
00:15:55,366 --> 00:15:58,176
I forgot how it was to just
whoop it up and party!
358
00:15:58,216 --> 00:15:59,296
Hey, hey, hey.
359
00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:02,663
Pops, come on,
people are looking at
you.
360
00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:03,330
It's been this way
ever since I was five, son.
361
00:16:03,366 --> 00:16:06,296
I stand out in the crowd.
People get jealous of me.
362
00:16:08,500 --> 00:16:09,330
(Marlon)
'Shawn, look.'
363
00:16:09,366 --> 00:16:11,216
Baby-haired Kim is all alone.
364
00:16:11,250 --> 00:16:14,220
I'm gonna step to her.
How do I look?
365
00:16:14,250 --> 00:16:16,230
Like a genetic
experiment
gone wrong.
366
00:16:16,266 --> 00:16:18,376
Yeah, how's the hair though?
367
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:21,330
- Like a perm went bad.
- Alright.
368
00:16:21,366 --> 00:16:23,146
Look, watch the stroll, boy.
369
00:16:23,183 --> 00:16:25,663
- Lean back. Lean back.
- Gangster land.
370
00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:27,350
(Shawn)
'Uh-huh. There you go.
Bring it.'
371
00:16:29,383 --> 00:16:32,323
Hey, Kim-Kim,
how you doing?
372
00:16:32,350 --> 00:16:34,300
- You look good, Kim.
- Thank you.
373
00:16:34,333 --> 00:16:37,133
Did you hear? I broke up
with my boyfriend.
374
00:16:37,166 --> 00:16:39,826
- No!
- Mm-hmm.
375
00:16:39,116 --> 00:16:42,196
You little..
Come here, baby!
376
00:16:42,233 --> 00:16:45,173
You must feel so
lonely
and depressed
377
00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:47,300
and...soft.
378
00:16:49,333 --> 00:16:52,173
Marlon, I never knew
you were so sensitive.
379
00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:54,230
You know, why did I set
my standards so high?
380
00:16:54,266 --> 00:16:57,996
Well, welcome to my world.
381
00:16:58,330 --> 00:17:01,100
Hey, sexy, how come you've been
ignoring me all night?
382
00:17:01,133 --> 00:17:03,663
I was dancing with your father.
383
00:17:03,100 --> 00:17:05,100
I want you to dance with me.
384
00:17:07,166 --> 00:17:08,196
[music stops]
385
00:17:08,233 --> 00:17:09,323
Now, who turned the music down?
386
00:17:09,350 --> 00:17:11,180
[people shushing]
387
00:17:11,216 --> 00:17:14,296
That's the picture
of Marlon on a pony. Oh!
388
00:17:14,333 --> 00:17:16,333
[people laughing]
389
00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:19,180
Look at that face! So cute.
390
00:17:19,216 --> 00:17:21,126
That's before he stepped
off the saddle
391
00:17:21,166 --> 00:17:23,656
and the horse dragged
him by his foot
392
00:17:23,100 --> 00:17:24,350
through three miles of cow poop.
393
00:17:24,383 --> 00:17:26,383
[all laughing]
394
00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:29,150
That's funny!
That isfunny!
395
00:17:29,183 --> 00:17:31,173
And here's a picture of him
afterwards. Look at it.
396
00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:33,370
'Boy, he stank!'
397
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,830
I'm talking about funky!
398
00:17:36,116 --> 00:17:38,156
And I made him sleep outside
for a week.
399
00:17:38,500 --> 00:17:39,330
[laughing]
400
00:17:39,660 --> 00:17:40,170
That is funny!
401
00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:43,160
Hey, Kim, I don't
smell
like that no more.
402
00:17:43,500 --> 00:17:45,120
It's okay.
I think it's cute.
403
00:17:45,150 --> 00:17:48,500
You do? I stepped
in some horse manure
earlier.
404
00:17:48,830 --> 00:17:49,500
Oh, look at this.
405
00:17:49,830 --> 00:17:50,330
This is the picture of Shawn
406
00:17:50,366 --> 00:17:53,656
when his mother and I
lost him at Macy's.
407
00:17:53,100 --> 00:17:54,220
'Look at him! Look at him!'
408
00:17:54,250 --> 00:17:57,330
'He's so scared,
he-he peed in his pants.'
409
00:17:57,366 --> 00:18:00,326
[all laughing]
410
00:18:00,660 --> 00:18:02,500
That ain't funny.
411
00:18:02,830 --> 00:18:03,230
Now, here is a picture
of both of them dancing.
412
00:18:03,266 --> 00:18:04,316
They used to do
this little dancing
413
00:18:04,350 --> 00:18:06,830
called the underpants dance.
414
00:18:06,116 --> 00:18:09,656
'They would put old drawers
on their head..'
415
00:18:09,100 --> 00:18:11,330
'...and then dance around
like little Indians like..'
416
00:18:11,660 --> 00:18:13,500
[ululating]
417
00:18:13,830 --> 00:18:14,330
Oh, wait, wait.
I wanna see this.
418
00:18:14,366 --> 00:18:16,276
When he has the stroke,
just promise me
419
00:18:16,316 --> 00:18:17,346
I get to pull the plug.
420
00:18:17,383 --> 00:18:19,833
You got it.
421
00:18:19,116 --> 00:18:21,156
You know what I wish
I had a picture of?
422
00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:23,000
These two used to do
a little musical act
423
00:18:23,330 --> 00:18:24,660
called the Williams Two.
424
00:18:24,100 --> 00:18:25,220
Pops, come on, chill.
425
00:18:25,250 --> 00:18:27,000
See, the Jacksons was
making all that money.
426
00:18:27,330 --> 00:18:29,000
I said to myself
"Wait a minute.
427
00:18:29,330 --> 00:18:30,170
Maybe I can make me
some of this paper."
428
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:31,270
You know, and the Jacksons
didn't have
429
00:18:31,300 --> 00:18:33,160
half the talent my boys had.
430
00:18:33,500 --> 00:18:36,220
Of course, they had more boys.
431
00:18:36,250 --> 00:18:38,200
Shawn, you never told me this.
432
00:18:38,233 --> 00:18:39,353
Do y'all wanna
get a little sample?
433
00:18:39,383 --> 00:18:41,123
(all)
Yeah!
434
00:18:41,150 --> 00:18:43,300
- Come on, pop!
- C'mon, boys, give 'em a
taste!
435
00:18:43,333 --> 00:18:45,153
No! We're not doing it, pop.
436
00:18:45,183 --> 00:18:47,833
Shawn, please, for me?
437
00:18:47,116 --> 00:18:49,096
Absolutely, positively not.
438
00:18:49,133 --> 00:18:52,283
Marlon, I would love
to see you do that.
439
00:18:53,250 --> 00:18:54,230
You would?
440
00:18:54,266 --> 00:18:55,276
♪ Rockin' in the tree top ♪
441
00:18:55,316 --> 00:18:57,116
♪ All day long ♪
442
00:18:57,150 --> 00:19:00,830
♪ Rockin' and a bobbin'
and a singin' that song ♪
443
00:19:00,116 --> 00:19:02,296
♪ All the little birdies
on jaybird street ♪
444
00:19:02,333 --> 00:19:05,503
♪ Love to hear the robins go
tweet tweet tweet ♪
445
00:19:05,830 --> 00:19:07,180
♪ Rockin' robin
tweet tweet tweet.. ♪
446
00:19:07,216 --> 00:19:10,326
Come on, sell it, boys!
Sell it!
447
00:19:11,250 --> 00:19:14,830
♪ 'Cause we're really
gonna rock tonight ♪
448
00:19:14,116 --> 00:19:16,316
♪ Yeah ♪♪
449
00:19:16,350 --> 00:19:18,830
[applause]
450
00:19:18,116 --> 00:19:20,326
Thank you!
451
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:21,230
See that? See that?
452
00:19:21,266 --> 00:19:23,656
I could be livin'
like a king in Encino
453
00:19:23,100 --> 00:19:25,500
just like Joe Jackson.
454
00:19:26,183 --> 00:19:29,503
Aw, girl, I sure wish
you could stay.
455
00:19:29,830 --> 00:19:31,180
Don't worry, Shawn.
We'll be together
again.
456
00:19:31,216 --> 00:19:33,826
Your father can't live forever.
457
00:19:33,116 --> 00:19:35,246
You're so funny. You're like
a regular Eddie Murphy.
458
00:19:35,283 --> 00:19:37,323
[imitating
Eddie Murphy's laugh]
459
00:19:39,133 --> 00:19:40,233
- I'll see you later on?
- Goodnight.
460
00:19:40,266 --> 00:19:41,376
Alright, sweetie.
461
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:44,280
- Get home safe.
- Yeah.
462
00:19:44,316 --> 00:19:48,496
Hoo! Man, this was
the longest night of my
life.
463
00:19:48,830 --> 00:19:50,160
I can't believe you let me do
"Rockin' Robin"
464
00:19:50,500 --> 00:19:51,830
in front of Kim.
465
00:19:51,116 --> 00:19:53,226
I can't believe
I live with you or Pops.
466
00:19:53,266 --> 00:19:56,296
Hey, don't blame me.
Blame him. It's his fault.
467
00:19:56,333 --> 00:19:58,253
No, it's my fault.
468
00:19:58,283 --> 00:20:01,003
I'm gonna go take care
of this right now.
469
00:20:01,330 --> 00:20:02,100
Yeah!
470
00:20:03,250 --> 00:20:06,280
- Yo, Pops!
- Pop!
471
00:20:06,316 --> 00:20:09,276
- Yo, Pops!
- Pop!
472
00:20:09,316 --> 00:20:12,116
Look, Pops,
you know I love you, man
473
00:20:12,150 --> 00:20:14,120
but you can't
stay here anymore.
474
00:20:14,150 --> 00:20:16,170
I can't live like this, gee.
475
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:18,320
This is my apartment.
This is my life.
476
00:20:18,350 --> 00:20:20,230
And I want it back.
477
00:20:20,266 --> 00:20:22,176
Yeah, me too!
478
00:20:26,283 --> 00:20:28,233
So I suggest if you have
any problems with mom
479
00:20:28,266 --> 00:20:30,326
you go over there
and work it out like a man
480
00:20:30,366 --> 00:20:32,196
instead of staying over here
bossing little me
481
00:20:32,233 --> 00:20:33,273
and Marlon around
482
00:20:33,300 --> 00:20:35,180
like we're some five-year-olds.
483
00:20:35,216 --> 00:20:38,326
Yeah, 'cause we're a
lot
older than that!
484
00:20:39,316 --> 00:20:41,216
Go on.
485
00:20:43,250 --> 00:20:46,170
Well, what do you have
to say about that?
486
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:49,120
- Good speech, son.
- Ah!
487
00:20:49,150 --> 00:20:51,250
Hey-hey. Hey, Pop.
That was all Shawn's opinion.
488
00:20:51,283 --> 00:20:53,333
'I had nothing to do with that.'
489
00:20:53,660 --> 00:20:55,660
I love you and I want
you
to stay forever.
490
00:20:55,100 --> 00:20:58,180
Marlon! Marlon, Marlon,
stop being such a suck up.
491
00:20:58,216 --> 00:21:00,156
You ought to be a man
like your brother.
492
00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:01,280
Yeah.
493
00:21:01,316 --> 00:21:03,296
- You made a lot of sense,
son.
- I did?
494
00:21:03,333 --> 00:21:06,003
You know, I told him
everything to say,
pop.
495
00:21:06,330 --> 00:21:08,120
Shut up.
You know, you're right.
496
00:21:08,150 --> 00:21:11,280
You're a man, and it's high
time
I recognize it.
497
00:21:11,316 --> 00:21:13,156
- Thanks, pop.
- That's right.
498
00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:15,320
We're all grown up men.
499
00:21:15,350 --> 00:21:17,830
Me too?
500
00:21:17,116 --> 00:21:18,296
Mm-hmm.
501
00:21:18,333 --> 00:21:21,303
Now, if you two
will excuse me
502
00:21:21,333 --> 00:21:24,663
I'm gonna take some of this
fine
advice that you've given me
503
00:21:24,100 --> 00:21:25,280
I'm gonna go home
504
00:21:25,316 --> 00:21:28,126
and I'm gonna grovel at your
mother's big flappin' feet.
505
00:21:28,166 --> 00:21:31,266
- Good idea.
- Ooh!
506
00:21:31,300 --> 00:21:34,120
- Great party, Marlon.
- Kim!
507
00:21:37,133 --> 00:21:39,833
[speaking in foreign language]
508
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:42,220
Thanks for the book, Marlon.
509
00:21:47,150 --> 00:21:50,150
[instrumental music]
510
00:21:56,350 --> 00:21:59,830
♪ Love to hear the robin go
tweet tweet tweet ♪
511
00:21:59,116 --> 00:22:01,826
♪ Rockin' robin
tweet tweet tweet.. ♪
512
00:22:01,116 --> 00:22:02,346
No, no, no.
That ain't the way it go.
513
00:22:02,383 --> 00:22:04,123
That ain't the way it go.
Look here, come on.
514
00:22:04,150 --> 00:22:05,330
It ain't
tweet, tweet, tweet, kick.
515
00:22:05,366 --> 00:22:07,366
It's kick, tweet, tweet, tweet.
516
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:10,160
Come on.
Kick, tweet, tweet, tweet.
517
00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:11,230
Kick, tweet, tweet..
518
00:22:11,266 --> 00:22:13,096
Oh, y'all ain't got it
right!
What's wrong with y'all?
519
00:22:13,133 --> 00:22:14,223
[screaming]
520
00:22:14,250 --> 00:22:16,660
Get on out of here!
521
00:22:16,100 --> 00:22:19,250
Tito! Get your butt down here!
522
00:22:19,283 --> 00:22:21,173
Michael!
523
00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:24,230
Leave that monkey alone
and get on over here!
524
00:22:24,266 --> 00:22:26,296
(Shawn)Look up, Marlon.Say cheese.
38078
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