All language subtitles for The.Demi.Lovato.Show.S01E03_English

The pain is really
tough, I know.

You know. We've been there.

But if I had ended my life
when I wanted to,

there is so much
I would've missed.

♪♪♪

One of the things I admire most
about today's guest

is that she's unafraid to stand
up for what she believes in,

even in the face of adversity.

She's an actress, producer,
activist, and total badass.

Joining me now, Olivia Munn.

- Hi!
- Hi!

I'm so excited for this.

One of the main things
that I really admire about you

is your sense of strength.

Where do you get that from?

I'm strong because a
strong woman raised me.

It's all I've been raised
to know is to--to be strong.

As women,
do you think our self-esteem

is often tied to external
things, like relationships,

or what others think about us?

Men are encouraged
to become someone,

and women are encouraged
to find someone.

It's really hard as we, you
know, grow up in our lives

to really try to actualize that
because we have our own dreams

and our own goals
and we want to become someone.

But the world is telling us
that we need to find someone

- to become something.
- Mm-hmm.

Why does society make us feel
the need as women to--

in order to have a happy ending
we have to have a partner?

When I take on any role, the
first thing that I ask myself

is "Does she exist
if he doesn't exist?"

- Mm.
- If the answer is no,

then I just can't take the
movie, no matter how big it is,

no matter what it is.

That also goes into movies
that I do take on.

So we're doing a scene.
It'll be me and my husband

and they'll say, "Okay, uh..."

To him: "Why don't you go
and, um, maybe pay some bills

or get on your computer?
And, Olivia,

why don't you just put
some dishes away?"

What we're doing is, we're
creating more microaggressions

- that go out into the world.
- Mm-hmm.

So when little girls
are watching these movies,

and they're seeing dads work
and go off to work

and moms stay home and clean,

those are the microaggressions
that get instilled into us.

You wonder why women
struggle so much.

It is impossible to do it all.

You know, nobody ever asks, "How
does Barack Obama do it all?

"How does he--how is he a father

and the President
of the United States?"

- [ chuckles ] Right.
- No one ever asks that.

- Right.
- Because no one ever

expects that of men.

That's so true.

In the MeToo movement,

you were so courageous
and so brave.

Were you afraid to speak up?

Yes,
there was definitely fear there,

but it didn't stop me from doing
what I know I had to do.

There were definitely times
when I was threatened

that I basically wouldn't have
a career anymore,

that I would be pissing off
the wrong people.

That never stopped me.

You can take my career.
You can take my house.

You can take my money,
but the things

that matter the most to me,
they're not up for sale.

That's...really
beautifully said.

♪♪♪

You had posted a caption
on Instagram

that literally made me cry
when I read it.

You were talking about
depression and anxiety.

Mm-hmm.

"Please listen to me, from
someone who is telling you

"that she's been where you are,

when I say that suicide
is not the right choice."

And it was just beautiful being
able to relate to something

and understand
where you're coming from now.

I'm--I'm glad that it--it--
it resonated with you.

People who deal with depression
like you and me

and who can have
suicidal thoughts,

any time you get to that place,

and it seems like things
are too tough

and you just can't
take it anymore,

just ask yourself if you can
just hold on another day,

because if you take your life,
game over. It's done.

You don't get to see
what will happen in 10 years.

The pain is really
tough, I know.

You know. We've been there.

But if I had ended my life
when I wanted to,

there is so much
I would have missed.

And that's, like,
worth staying for.

It's a permanent solution
to a temporary problem.

You know, and for people
who struggle with it,

- it doesn't feel temporary.
- Right.

It's like, I know I'm never
fully gonna be free

- from my eating disorder.
- Hmm.

But I know that every time
I don't get rid of my meal,

- I'm flexing that muscle.
- Yeah.

Something that's been
extremely empowering to me

is rewriting my narrative.

- Mm-hmm. Yes.
- So...

growing up having,
quote-unquote, daddy issues--

In 2017, I had a song
called "Daddy Issues."

- I was living that narrative.
- Yeah.

And I've learned
how to take it back.

♪♪♪

What advice would you give
for young women

who are struggling
with self-love?

Self-love to me comes from
knowing what really, really
matters.

What matters the most?
My family's love,

my friends' love and respect,

my integrity,
and so first you have to look at

the people in your life

and the apps on your phone.

[ chuckles ]

- For real.
- Mm-hmm.

Because you can't allow

people to litter so much
negativity in your world

and then wonder
why your life is trashed.

Ask yourself, is this necessary?

Does it make my life better?

Do I like myself more?

We all have those insecurities.
The difference is,

you cannot let
a small human feeling

become the narrative
for your life.

Mm-hmm.

Insecurity that comes up

is a tiny drop in the ocean
of who you are.

That's why it's so important

to fill your mind and your heart
with so many other things

so that you can really
lean on those things

and be proud of those things.
Because if outside validation

is your biggest source
of nourishment,

you will be hungry
the rest of your life.

Oh, you are preaching
to the choir

because I was so hungry
for so many years.

Mm-hmm.

I know that you're also
so passionate

- about rescuing animals.
- Mm-hmm.

I would love to hear more.

I partnered with
the Humane Society

and Maddie's Fund
and The Ad Council,

and that's to get out the word
to people

that shelter pets
are--are awesome,

and my two pups,
Chance and Frankie,

were on this campaign
across the country

- so it's so cute to see
billboards. - Yes!

It's, like, the cutest thing
in the world to see.

I just love it.
And the thing about rescuing

that people don't always
understand is that any dog that
you want,

even if it's a hypoallergenic
dog or a special purebred dog,

you can find them at a rescue
because

- there are a lot of puppy
mills. - Mm.

My dog Chance, he's a purebred
Cavalier King Charles

who was rescued from
a puppy mill in New York.

And so anything that you want,
it just takes a little bit

of work to find the right one,

but you're helping to
save a life for sure.

Well, this was just so much fun,
and I seriously appreciate you

for being such a badass
and such a great role model

for not only millions of people
but me, too.

Aw, that means so much to me.

Thank you so much for having me.
This has been so much fun.

- We're gonna keep talking.
- I know! [ laughs ]

We're gonna keep hanging out.