All language subtitles for Ask.Dr.Ruth.2019.1080p.HULU.WEB-DL.AAC.H.264-Monkee.-engl.

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:22,837 --> 00:00:26,512 [Dr. Ruth laughs] 2 00:00:29,016 --> 00:00:31,104 Well, put it on again. 3 00:00:31,187 --> 00:00:33,609 What's her name? Alexis. 4 00:00:34,443 --> 00:00:39,705 Wait to? Is it called Alexa? Alexa? 5 00:00:40,414 --> 00:00:42,961 Alexa, will I get a boyfriend? 6 00:00:44,965 --> 00:00:46,969 [Alexa] Sorry, I don't know. 7 00:00:47,887 --> 00:00:50,935 Me neither. Unplug it! 8 00:00:51,311 --> 00:00:55,235 If you don't know that, what is she for? [laughs] 9 00:00:55,319 --> 00:00:57,991 Alexa, who is Dr. Ruth? 10 00:00:59,870 --> 00:01:01,957 [Alexa] A towel is an absorbent piece 11 00:01:02,041 --> 00:01:05,088 of cloth or paper that is used for drying a body or a surface. 12 00:01:05,213 --> 00:01:07,719 [laughs] No. 13 00:01:07,969 --> 00:01:10,933 Alexa, who is Dr. Ruth Westheimer? 14 00:01:11,977 --> 00:01:14,941 [Alexa] Ruth Westheimer, known as Dr. Ruth, 15 00:01:15,025 --> 00:01:17,864 she is a German Jewish immigrant in the United States 16 00:01:17,947 --> 00:01:20,202 that became in figure of television 17 00:01:20,285 --> 00:01:21,747 and popular culture 18 00:01:21,830 --> 00:01:25,462 as a sex therapist, media character and author. 19 00:01:27,091 --> 00:01:28,093 Rafi! 20 00:01:28,176 --> 00:01:31,015 You listened? He knows who I am! 21 00:01:34,564 --> 00:01:37,444 Well, I think I'll keep it. 22 00:01:38,531 --> 00:01:40,868 She has all the answers. 23 00:01:40,952 --> 00:01:42,580 I love her so much, 24 00:01:42,664 --> 00:01:46,212 the goddess of good sex, Dr. Ruth Westheimer. 25 00:01:46,295 --> 00:01:47,757 [applause] 26 00:01:50,011 --> 00:01:51,180 Dr. Ruth! 27 00:01:51,264 --> 00:01:53,519 Talk about the penis like in a cooking show. 28 00:01:54,855 --> 00:01:58,988 First, grasp the penis with your fingers, knead the bread ... No. 29 00:01:59,071 --> 00:02:01,743 Dr. Ruth alright let a man make noises 30 00:02:01,827 --> 00:02:03,079 while he's having sex? 31 00:02:03,163 --> 00:02:05,000 Of course it's alright 32 00:02:05,083 --> 00:02:06,962 as long as you don't wake up your wife. 33 00:02:07,045 --> 00:02:07,964 [audience laughs] 34 00:02:08,047 --> 00:02:12,515 I'll make you say vagina and clitoris 35 00:02:12,599 --> 00:02:15,187 because I always listen to you talk about the penis. 36 00:02:15,270 --> 00:02:16,982 Can you say that word again? 37 00:02:17,065 --> 00:02:18,193 - Erection? - Yes. 38 00:02:18,276 --> 00:02:20,238 - Yes. - Say it a little louder. 39 00:02:20,573 --> 00:02:21,909 Erection! 40 00:02:22,493 --> 00:02:25,415 This is the cable version from Mr. Rogers or something like that, you know? 41 00:02:25,499 --> 00:02:27,461 I mean, can you say clitoris? 42 00:02:27,545 --> 00:02:29,465 Dr. Ruth, does size matter? 43 00:02:29,549 --> 00:02:30,510 [Dra. Ruth] No. 44 00:02:30,593 --> 00:02:31,469 Really? 45 00:02:31,845 --> 00:02:33,974 Size has nothing to do with it ... 46 00:02:34,058 --> 00:02:34,976 [Howard] Really? 47 00:02:35,060 --> 00:02:37,732 ... with sexual satisfaction of a woman. 48 00:02:37,816 --> 00:02:40,738 If you don't do something else in your radio and TV shows, 49 00:02:40,822 --> 00:02:43,828 you educate people so you know you are not alone 50 00:02:44,119 --> 00:02:46,040 - with your sexual problems. - I do. 51 00:02:46,123 --> 00:02:47,919 But you have changed sex for America 52 00:02:48,002 --> 00:02:49,881 Don't tell me it's worse now. 53 00:02:49,965 --> 00:02:51,677 [Jerry] No, now it's better. Everybody knows. 54 00:02:52,302 --> 00:02:54,098 You do not feel to suffer. 55 00:02:54,473 --> 00:02:58,732 Don't fake it. Don't be sad and frustrated. 56 00:02:58,816 --> 00:03:00,026 If not do something about it. 57 00:03:10,631 --> 00:03:13,846 WASHINGTON HEIGHTS NEW YORK CITY 58 00:03:16,643 --> 00:03:18,479 - [man] Hello, love. - [Dra. Ruth] Hey, hi. 59 00:03:18,564 --> 00:03:20,985 - How are you? - Well, you'll be on camera. 60 00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:22,279 - Fantastic. - Well. 61 00:03:22,362 --> 00:03:23,866 This is the doctor, this is my love. 62 00:03:24,951 --> 00:03:26,203 - Thanks. - That's my love. 63 00:03:26,287 --> 00:03:27,582 - You too, come here. - Of course, of course. 64 00:03:27,665 --> 00:03:31,798 Come both, you'll be on camera, thank you 65 00:03:33,009 --> 00:03:38,311 That is a bomber. Well! And here comes a film crew, 66 00:03:38,394 --> 00:03:41,943 close the door of my room, I don't want Ryan to come in. 67 00:03:43,906 --> 00:03:45,325 [indecipherable conversation] 68 00:03:46,077 --> 00:03:47,955 Here are some cookies. 69 00:03:50,503 --> 00:03:55,053 I have lived in this apartment for 54 years. 70 00:03:55,513 --> 00:03:58,393 Rob, have some cookies. 71 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:03,862 When I started to appear on television, 72 00:04:04,071 --> 00:04:06,117 people said: "Why don't you move in?" 73 00:04:07,244 --> 00:04:10,918 But this is an immigrant neighborhood, and I said: 74 00:04:11,001 --> 00:04:12,588 "No, I'm comfortable here." 75 00:04:15,135 --> 00:04:16,722 Did you call your mother? 76 00:04:17,431 --> 00:04:19,309 [the telephone rings] 77 00:04:19,393 --> 00:04:23,484 - Hi Yes! [speaking Hebrew] 78 00:04:23,610 --> 00:04:25,740 - Already. - [the telephone rings] 79 00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:28,161 Well. [Speaking Hebrew] 80 00:04:28,244 --> 00:04:30,750 - Shabbat Shalom. - [the telephone rings] 81 00:04:30,833 --> 00:04:34,381 - Well, bye, bye. [speaks in Hebrew] 82 00:04:34,465 --> 00:04:36,803 [in English] Bye, bye, hello? 83 00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:42,857 Yes, she had just come back from doing Good morning America . 84 00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:45,320 I did very well. 85 00:04:45,821 --> 00:04:46,907 Yes, 86 00:04:47,658 --> 00:04:50,038 find it online and I'll be there at 6:30. 87 00:04:53,086 --> 00:04:54,379 Well. 88 00:04:55,215 --> 00:04:58,514 For me there is no withdrawal. 89 00:04:58,931 --> 00:05:00,559 And I'm very lucky. 90 00:05:00,684 --> 00:05:04,191 I have a minister of communications, Pierre. 91 00:05:04,609 --> 00:05:07,865 I tell everyone, if they want get to me, call Pierre. 92 00:05:07,990 --> 00:05:09,243 [the telephone rings] 93 00:05:09,619 --> 00:05:10,621 [Pierre] Hello Ruth! 94 00:05:10,704 --> 00:05:13,417 [Dra. Ruth] Okay! They sent me my calendar, thank you. 95 00:05:13,502 --> 00:05:14,796 MINISTER OF COMMUNICATIONS DR. RUTH 96 00:05:14,879 --> 00:05:15,798 Agree. 97 00:05:15,881 --> 00:05:20,056 [Pierre] I've worked with Dr. Ruth since she started. 98 00:05:20,140 --> 00:05:22,060 she 36 years ago. 99 00:05:22,144 --> 00:05:24,481 [Dra. Ruth] I tell you what I need, Pierre. 100 00:05:24,649 --> 00:05:30,243 Please pass me the name Marvel owner type. 101 00:05:30,326 --> 00:05:31,997 Was it Stan Lee? 102 00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,588 [Dra. Ruth] He owns Marvel. 103 00:05:35,754 --> 00:05:37,675 I don't remember her name. 104 00:05:37,758 --> 00:05:39,512 [Pierre] I'd love to retire, 105 00:05:39,596 --> 00:05:40,890 but Dr. Ruth is not retiring. 106 00:05:42,810 --> 00:05:44,898 His calendar of hers is overflowing. 107 00:05:44,981 --> 00:05:46,192 It has no end. 108 00:05:46,483 --> 00:05:48,112 So we talk a lot often, 109 00:05:48,196 --> 00:05:51,578 sometimes up to 25 or 30 times a day. 110 00:05:56,462 --> 00:06:00,136 Most can't keep up because she doesn't stop. 111 00:06:01,180 --> 00:06:04,144 She teaches two courses, one at Hunter College 112 00:06:04,228 --> 00:06:07,150 and the other in Teacher's College from Columbia University. 113 00:06:07,234 --> 00:06:09,404 [Dra. Ruth] Despite investigations from Kinsey, Masters, 114 00:06:09,488 --> 00:06:11,534 Johnson and Helen Singer-Kaplan, 115 00:06:11,618 --> 00:06:13,997 there is still a lot of work to do. 116 00:06:14,498 --> 00:06:16,126 Tuesday, October 2 117 00:06:16,210 --> 00:06:20,636 you travel to boston to the Forbes 30 under 30 festival. 118 00:06:20,886 --> 00:06:23,558 Give her an orgasm, if you don't know how to do it, 119 00:06:23,642 --> 00:06:25,938 - I'll show you next time. - [laughs] 120 00:06:26,021 --> 00:06:30,238 On Wednesday 21 you go to Boulder, Colorado, 121 00:06:30,321 --> 00:06:31,407 to the air force academy. 122 00:06:31,490 --> 00:06:33,620 There I see a short person. 123 00:06:33,704 --> 00:06:36,751 I must tell you that the short people they are the best lovers. 124 00:06:36,835 --> 00:06:38,880 [Pierre] They still invite her to give lectures. 125 00:06:38,964 --> 00:06:41,093 she has a newspaper column in the magazine Time. 126 00:06:41,176 --> 00:06:42,095 QUESTION TO DR. RUTH: HOW TO GET ORGASMS EASIER? 127 00:06:42,178 --> 00:06:43,724 She still writes books. 128 00:06:43,807 --> 00:06:44,851 Do you see it, David? 129 00:06:44,934 --> 00:06:45,894 STAY OR GO 130 00:06:45,978 --> 00:06:47,230 I think he's number forty. 131 00:06:47,648 --> 00:06:51,405 [Pierre] Three books will be released in 2018. 132 00:06:51,488 --> 00:06:52,490 FROM YOU TWO 133 00:06:52,575 --> 00:06:55,539 Out of Print! Grandma Roller Coaster. 134 00:06:56,791 --> 00:06:59,881 So on Friday the 12th you'll be in Good Morning America. 135 00:06:59,964 --> 00:07:01,091 Fix it or leave it THE ULTIMATE LOVE TIPS 136 00:07:01,175 --> 00:07:03,262 Dr. Ruth, my boyfriend is passing more time on the phone ... 137 00:07:03,345 --> 00:07:05,391 ... than with me. Do I fix it or leave it? 138 00:07:05,475 --> 00:07:07,312 - Leave it alone! - Leave it alone? 139 00:07:07,395 --> 00:07:10,819 [Pierre] Sunday you play the queen at the medieval festival. 140 00:07:11,236 --> 00:07:14,117 I want them to see that I go hand in hand with the king. 141 00:07:14,201 --> 00:07:15,203 [laughs] 142 00:07:15,286 --> 00:07:18,000 Whoever applauds the loudest ... 143 00:07:18,084 --> 00:07:19,044 TOURNAMENT FIELD 144 00:07:19,127 --> 00:07:21,465 ... I promise you good sex for the rest of his life. 145 00:07:21,549 --> 00:07:23,720 - [the public celebrates] - Let's give a clap. 146 00:07:23,804 --> 00:07:25,974 [Pierre] If Ruth doesn't have nothing scheduled 147 00:07:26,058 --> 00:07:28,395 makes sure to get something. 148 00:07:28,479 --> 00:07:31,694 And that's part of the advice that she always gives me, 149 00:07:32,487 --> 00:07:34,157 get out a bit 150 00:07:34,742 --> 00:07:36,370 to meet people. 151 00:07:37,163 --> 00:07:39,126 It was always like this. 152 00:07:40,419 --> 00:07:42,132 Always dating. 153 00:07:43,259 --> 00:07:48,979 And on June 4, she will celebrate 90 years. 154 00:07:49,981 --> 00:07:51,400 - [Dra. Ruth] Bye. - [Security guard] Bye. 155 00:07:51,734 --> 00:07:53,279 [Dra. Ruth] Goodbye in the rain. 156 00:08:00,459 --> 00:08:02,005 [Dra. Ruth] Okay, Cliff? 157 00:08:04,677 --> 00:08:06,013 A cluttered desk IT'S A SIGN OF GREATNESS 158 00:08:06,096 --> 00:08:07,098 Well. 159 00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:10,396 - In agreement. - In agreement. 160 00:08:11,190 --> 00:08:13,235 When we played all the tapes to hard drives ... 161 00:08:13,319 --> 00:08:14,196 ARCHIVIST OF DR. RUTH 162 00:08:14,279 --> 00:08:15,741 ... they stayed here, there are hundreds of programs in these ... 163 00:08:15,824 --> 00:08:17,620 [Dra. Ruth] My whole career is it in these boxes? 164 00:08:17,703 --> 00:08:18,663 [Cliff] Exactly. 165 00:08:18,747 --> 00:08:22,378 But you know I couldn't put them without you here. 166 00:08:22,630 --> 00:08:25,259 - I know. - I don't know which button to press, 167 00:08:25,636 --> 00:08:27,305 But I like it! 168 00:08:27,514 --> 00:08:28,934 [Cliff] Well, do you want to see some of these? 169 00:08:29,017 --> 00:08:29,977 [Dra. Ruth] Yes. 170 00:08:30,436 --> 00:08:32,608 The lady known as "Grandmother Freud" 171 00:08:32,691 --> 00:08:34,987 He has earned millions of followers 172 00:08:35,071 --> 00:08:38,912 just to talk about sex graphically and nonstop. 173 00:08:39,371 --> 00:08:41,793 If you don't want to hear the things that she says, 174 00:08:42,043 --> 00:08:46,426 consider this a warning. Not everyone approves of what she does. 175 00:08:46,511 --> 00:08:48,807 [man] Ruth, I'm going to have to arrest her. 176 00:08:48,890 --> 00:08:50,226 [crowd roars] 177 00:08:50,309 --> 00:08:53,232 [Diane Sawyer] This is what happened at Oklahoma State University. 178 00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:57,908 A person in the audience, upset for the explicitness of Ruth Westheimer 179 00:08:57,992 --> 00:09:00,162 she wanted to make a citizen arrest. 180 00:09:00,246 --> 00:09:03,503 It was another day in the life from Dr. Ruth, 181 00:09:03,587 --> 00:09:05,966 the sex therapist most famous in the nation. 182 00:09:06,383 --> 00:09:08,095 Hello, she is on the air. 183 00:09:08,178 --> 00:09:09,682 - [man] Huh, Dr. Ruth? - Hello. 184 00:09:09,765 --> 00:09:12,270 [man] I'd like to know her opinion about the marital effect ... 185 00:09:12,353 --> 00:09:14,482 - Yes. ‐... of vibrators and things like that. 186 00:09:14,567 --> 00:09:16,445 Does your wife use a vibrator? 187 00:09:16,529 --> 00:09:19,952 - [man] No . - Would you use one? 188 00:09:20,202 --> 00:09:22,248 - I don't know. - You do not know. 189 00:09:22,332 --> 00:09:25,505 Would you like to see her wear one? 190 00:09:25,964 --> 00:09:28,637 - Yes. - Well, go and buy it. 191 00:09:29,429 --> 00:09:30,431 [man laughs] Okay. 192 00:09:31,224 --> 00:09:34,397 [John] When we went on the air in 1984 193 00:09:34,481 --> 00:09:38,990 nobody was so explicit about sex as was Ruth. 194 00:09:39,074 --> 00:09:42,330 There are a number of words that you can't say. 195 00:09:42,956 --> 00:09:44,292 Well, we used to say them. 196 00:09:44,376 --> 00:09:45,336 TV PRODUCER OF DRA. RUTH 197 00:09:45,419 --> 00:09:50,597 And then let me meta the penis into the vagina from behind. 198 00:09:50,972 --> 00:09:55,732 The reason that is behind is that the clitoris should be exposed 199 00:09:55,816 --> 00:10:00,826 so that both you and him could stimulate him to orgasm. 200 00:10:00,909 --> 00:10:02,663 RESERVATIONS OF DR. RUTH GIVE FOOT TO PROTESTS 201 00:10:03,247 --> 00:10:04,332 CARDS SEXUAL GARBAGE EVERYWHERE 202 00:10:04,416 --> 00:10:06,504 [Greg] Younger people does not understand the controversy. 203 00:10:06,587 --> 00:10:07,840 PROPOSES TO "ENJOY" MASTURBATION 204 00:10:07,923 --> 00:10:09,510 ENCOURAGE ORAL SEX 205 00:10:09,593 --> 00:10:11,597 He always says there is nothing normal. 206 00:10:11,681 --> 00:10:13,350 "THIS WOMAN PROMOTES HOMOSEXUALITY AND ANAL SEX. " 207 00:10:13,434 --> 00:10:14,729 We are all normal. 208 00:10:14,854 --> 00:10:16,273 Ruth was at the forefront of that ... 209 00:10:16,356 --> 00:10:17,400 TV PRODUCER 210 00:10:17,483 --> 00:10:19,320 ... and she gave us permission to talk about it. 211 00:10:19,404 --> 00:10:22,536 I think it's wonderful that people can ask those questions 212 00:10:22,619 --> 00:10:26,460 that they would not have dared to do just 10 years ago. 213 00:10:26,544 --> 00:10:29,800 [man] Lately, when my girlfriend and I we are having sex, 214 00:10:29,884 --> 00:10:33,975 I was ejaculating just beginning, and ... 215 00:10:34,058 --> 00:10:37,023 You mean you do as soon as you enter the vagina? 216 00:10:37,106 --> 00:10:37,983 [man] Just a little bit. 217 00:10:38,066 --> 00:10:40,154 [Greg] I was careful to make sure 218 00:10:40,237 --> 00:10:43,327 that your professional credentials were always visible. 219 00:10:43,410 --> 00:10:46,458 He taught at Columbia University, in Princeton, 220 00:10:46,542 --> 00:10:48,755 and was a licensed sex therapist. 221 00:10:49,255 --> 00:10:53,973 So it worked, and we did five hundred programs. [laughs] 222 00:10:54,390 --> 00:10:59,484 I think it has to do with not being neither tall, nor blonde, nor pretty. 223 00:11:00,654 --> 00:11:03,743 And since I'm older, they often say: 224 00:11:04,369 --> 00:11:08,586 "Yes my mother or my grandmother they could talk like that. " 225 00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:10,632 [man] God bless you, Dr. Ruth. I'll tell you something, 226 00:11:10,715 --> 00:11:13,805 keep up the wonderful work, and I hope nobody censors her, 227 00:11:13,888 --> 00:11:15,559 because you are a gift from God for men and women. 228 00:11:15,642 --> 00:11:16,727 Thanks. 229 00:11:16,811 --> 00:11:19,733 Thank you, from your mouth to the censors! 230 00:11:21,069 --> 00:11:23,448 [Greg] Every time I'm with her, 231 00:11:23,533 --> 00:11:26,454 people come to tell me that she changed her lives 232 00:11:26,914 --> 00:11:29,962 or did she save their lives or she saved them from committing suicide. 233 00:11:31,256 --> 00:11:35,682 All for that adorable grandmother that she was on TV, 234 00:11:35,765 --> 00:11:39,439 speaking honestly about relationships, 235 00:11:39,523 --> 00:11:41,986 how we love, who we love. 236 00:11:42,069 --> 00:11:45,994 The deepest and most personal things that give us happiness. 237 00:11:46,996 --> 00:11:49,292 [man] Welcome, the only one and unique Dr. Ruth Westheimer. 238 00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:50,419 [applause] 239 00:11:50,503 --> 00:11:54,260 [Diane] Wherever he goes, advises, educates, moves. 240 00:11:54,344 --> 00:11:59,897 Everything that two adults do consentingly in a private room, 241 00:11:59,980 --> 00:12:02,569 living room or kitchen is fine. 242 00:12:03,655 --> 00:12:05,867 [Diane] But some colleagues by Dr. Ruth Westheimer 243 00:12:05,951 --> 00:12:08,372 they believe it does more than good. 244 00:12:08,539 --> 00:12:12,171 [Dr. Lee] I think she's very fast to give specific advice 245 00:12:12,254 --> 00:12:13,925 without knowing the background of the person's life. 246 00:12:14,008 --> 00:12:15,010 PSYCHOLOGIST 247 00:12:15,094 --> 00:12:19,394 All right, Tracy. I think you should look for yourself a new man, okay? 248 00:12:20,605 --> 00:12:22,024 [Diane] Do you think he's reckless? 249 00:12:23,151 --> 00:12:27,995 It is a harsh word. I hate using the word. But yeah, I think it's reckless. 250 00:12:28,078 --> 00:12:32,044 [Diane] But they don't bother him much the criticisms. The woman they call 251 00:12:32,128 --> 00:12:35,844 "The Happy Sex Girl" is actually very hard. 252 00:12:36,261 --> 00:12:40,937 She was a girl from Frankfurt, Germany, when the Nazis seized power. 253 00:12:45,070 --> 00:12:45,947 [Dra. Ruth] So ... 254 00:12:46,031 --> 00:12:49,078 [creaks] 255 00:12:50,289 --> 00:12:53,253 ... I have something that is very sacred. 256 00:12:56,594 --> 00:13:00,017 When I left Germany when she was ten, 257 00:13:00,476 --> 00:13:03,440 the only thing in the suitcase 258 00:13:03,983 --> 00:13:06,196 my parents 259 00:13:06,697 --> 00:13:08,325 it was this wipe. 260 00:13:08,408 --> 00:13:10,162 Look how beautiful it is. 261 00:13:10,747 --> 00:13:11,916 And here, 262 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:14,295 KS, 263 00:13:14,797 --> 00:13:16,801 which means Karola Siegel. 264 00:13:17,176 --> 00:13:22,854 My name in Germany was Karola. And this rag always went with me. 265 00:13:23,438 --> 00:13:25,359 I never forget where I put it. 266 00:13:26,152 --> 00:13:30,160 And, uh, it serves as a tie, 267 00:13:30,244 --> 00:13:33,500 huh, with my past. 268 00:13:37,216 --> 00:13:40,598 I was born on June 4, 1928 269 00:13:40,682 --> 00:13:43,353 with the name Karola Siegel 270 00:13:43,436 --> 00:13:46,986 in a town not far from Frankfurt, Germany. 271 00:13:48,573 --> 00:13:54,000 She was the only daughter from some Orthodox Jews. 272 00:13:54,083 --> 00:13:55,837 They weren't rich, 273 00:13:55,920 --> 00:14:00,638 but my first ten years they were ideal. 274 00:14:00,722 --> 00:14:06,274 Doting father, adorable grandmother, that they took great care of me. 275 00:14:10,324 --> 00:14:15,375 But in the thirties things changed drastically 276 00:14:15,459 --> 00:14:17,589 when Hitler took power. 277 00:14:21,597 --> 00:14:24,645 One morning in November 1938, 278 00:14:25,020 --> 00:14:27,984 the Nazis came to the department. 279 00:14:28,778 --> 00:14:34,581 There were no screams, but I had 10 and a half years and I was scared. 280 00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:41,469 I remember the black boots and the Nazis telling my father: "get dressed." 281 00:14:43,181 --> 00:14:48,609 My grandmother had money in the hem of the skirt. 282 00:14:49,026 --> 00:14:54,830 she gave it to the Nazi and said: "take good care of my son." 283 00:14:57,042 --> 00:15:02,595 They took my father to the street, and before getting on the truck 284 00:15:04,140 --> 00:15:07,146 he turned around, waved and smiled, 285 00:15:07,647 --> 00:15:10,402 even though he must have been terrified. 286 00:15:13,491 --> 00:15:16,790 A few months before that war broke out, 287 00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:20,088 things were bleak in Germany. 288 00:15:20,882 --> 00:15:26,184 They burned the synagogues and looted Jewish stores. 289 00:15:28,606 --> 00:15:33,406 My father sent a postcard from the field of work saying 290 00:15:33,490 --> 00:15:38,834 to join a group of Orthodox Jewish children. 291 00:15:38,918 --> 00:15:43,384 A transport of children with permission to go to Switzerland. 292 00:15:44,386 --> 00:15:46,307 He did not want to leave Frankfurt. 293 00:15:47,184 --> 00:15:50,691 He had 13 dolls. He had two dollhouses. He had skates. 294 00:15:50,775 --> 00:15:52,654 She was an only child. 295 00:15:52,737 --> 00:15:57,204 He had a grandmother who only dedicated herself to take care of me. 296 00:15:57,664 --> 00:16:02,172 But he was 10 years old, and when he saw the postcard, I knew I had to go. 297 00:16:04,845 --> 00:16:08,059 The morning after, my mother and my grandmother came with me 298 00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:11,650 to the Frankfurt train station. 299 00:16:13,194 --> 00:16:16,033 My mother hugged me. My grandmother hugged me. 300 00:16:16,535 --> 00:16:18,789 I went to the wagon. 301 00:16:19,498 --> 00:16:23,006 I looked back and I did as my father had done. 302 00:16:23,549 --> 00:16:26,889 I was very sad, but I greeted them 303 00:16:26,972 --> 00:16:31,607 to make it work for them easier to say goodbye. 304 00:16:31,690 --> 00:16:33,443 [train snorting] 305 00:16:42,921 --> 00:16:45,217 WENGEN, SWITZERLAND 306 00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:48,306 [train puffing away] 307 00:16:52,397 --> 00:16:56,239 My parents actually gave me life twice. 308 00:16:57,449 --> 00:17:03,336 One when I was born, and the other when I was sent to Switzerland. 309 00:17:09,181 --> 00:17:12,187 Everyone was very worried on the train. 310 00:17:12,271 --> 00:17:16,780 We were thinking: what will happen next? Will I see my family again? 311 00:17:17,155 --> 00:17:21,832 Therefore, to pass the time easier, 312 00:17:21,915 --> 00:17:23,961 I started to sing 313 00:17:24,253 --> 00:17:26,675 the songs of my Jewish environment. 314 00:17:27,259 --> 00:17:32,269 Some songs from Germany. Lots of nursery rhymes. 315 00:17:32,937 --> 00:17:35,191 And I got everyone to sing. 316 00:17:35,275 --> 00:17:37,195 [kids laughing] 317 00:17:42,289 --> 00:17:47,717 When the group of children came to the town of Heiden, Switzerland, 318 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:50,305 fifty of us we went to a hospice, 319 00:17:50,388 --> 00:17:53,646 which ended up being an orphanage for people like us. 320 00:17:54,606 --> 00:17:59,073 And when I got there I wanted to show how well raised she was, 321 00:17:59,406 --> 00:18:02,955 for which I went with the director from the orphanage, 322 00:18:03,039 --> 00:18:05,795 named Riesenfeld, and I said: 323 00:18:06,170 --> 00:18:08,007 [Dr. Ruth speaks in German] "Hello, my name is Karola Siegel. 324 00:18:08,091 --> 00:18:09,636 I come from Frankfurt an Main. " 325 00:18:11,515 --> 00:18:13,852 [in English] We were second-class citizens. 326 00:18:14,646 --> 00:18:20,533 We had to take care of the Swiss children and do housework. 327 00:18:21,952 --> 00:18:27,087 It's strange, because the orphanage It was called Wartheim. 328 00:18:27,630 --> 00:18:29,718 Warten means to wait. 329 00:18:30,594 --> 00:18:35,646 But we didn't know how long We were going to be there. 330 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:50,467 This diary, if you can see it, it even has a padlock. 331 00:18:51,260 --> 00:18:56,605 Don't ask me where the key is. I found her! Here it is! 332 00:19:00,361 --> 00:19:04,077 I started keeping a journal in the orphanage in Switzerland. 333 00:19:05,205 --> 00:19:09,421 I wrote things there that she didn't tell anyone. 334 00:19:12,177 --> 00:19:14,849 [speaks German] 335 00:19:15,518 --> 00:19:18,649 [in English] Mom, why aren't you here? 336 00:19:20,193 --> 00:19:25,746 [speaking in German] 337 00:19:28,544 --> 00:19:31,633 [in English] Why aren't you here? It would work for you. 338 00:19:31,716 --> 00:19:35,975 I would support you. I would give you a good life. 339 00:19:38,647 --> 00:19:42,195 [young Ruth] I get up at 6.30 I get dressed. 340 00:19:42,572 --> 00:19:46,495 We wake up the children at 7 am and then I'm busy until 7.30 341 00:19:47,582 --> 00:19:50,671 then I put the tables, I clean the dining room 342 00:19:50,754 --> 00:19:52,382 and I comb the children. 343 00:19:53,301 --> 00:19:55,973 After eating I do let the little ones take a nap. 344 00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:57,977 Then I make patches. 345 00:19:58,812 --> 00:20:03,029 At night I bathe the children and after dinner I clean their shoes. 346 00:20:03,822 --> 00:20:06,201 I really like my homework. 347 00:20:07,078 --> 00:20:10,794 [Dra. Ruth] I was always afraid that director Riesenfeld 348 00:20:11,170 --> 00:20:12,924 find those diaries. 349 00:20:13,675 --> 00:20:17,934 That's why I didn't write anything against from the orphanage. 350 00:20:20,063 --> 00:20:24,237 The people who took care of us They were also refugees. 351 00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:28,162 They were worried about their lives. 352 00:20:30,124 --> 00:20:34,968 So those kids, myself included, we became like brothers 353 00:20:35,051 --> 00:20:36,846 that we took care of ourselves each other. 354 00:20:36,930 --> 00:20:39,184 [Doorbell is ringing] 355 00:20:39,267 --> 00:20:41,188 Well, his wife is here. 356 00:20:42,232 --> 00:20:43,317 [Dra. Ruth] Hello! 357 00:20:43,401 --> 00:20:46,198 - Saved by the bell! - [Dra. Ruth] Well, we found it. 358 00:20:46,658 --> 00:20:49,121 Good good good. 359 00:20:49,747 --> 00:20:51,751 - You were my first boyfriend. - [Walter] Good. 360 00:20:51,835 --> 00:20:52,753 WALTER NOTHMANN CHILDHOOD BOYFRIEND OF DR. RUTH 361 00:20:52,837 --> 00:20:54,297 You were younger than me. 362 00:20:54,966 --> 00:20:56,260 I still am. 363 00:20:56,636 --> 00:21:01,270 You were the person Heiden's most important 364 00:21:01,646 --> 00:21:02,857 in my life, 365 00:21:02,940 --> 00:21:04,484 and then you cheated on me! 366 00:21:04,861 --> 00:21:06,488 He left with an older woman. 367 00:21:06,781 --> 00:21:08,200 [Debbie Nothmann] You were also an older woman. 368 00:21:08,284 --> 00:21:11,331 I know I'm older than him but he left with a much older one! 369 00:21:12,333 --> 00:21:13,962 WALTER'S WIFE 370 00:21:14,421 --> 00:21:16,467 [Walter] We must have been ten or eleven when we start. 371 00:21:16,551 --> 00:21:17,511 Correct. 372 00:21:17,928 --> 00:21:20,934 We had a classroom in Heiden. 373 00:21:21,686 --> 00:21:27,304 She couldn't stay still, or in silence, not even for ten seconds. 374 00:21:27,346 --> 00:21:28,533 Impossible. 375 00:21:30,161 --> 00:21:32,123 [whistling] 376 00:21:32,207 --> 00:21:33,292 All the time! 377 00:21:34,837 --> 00:21:36,591 [Dra. Ruth] You were so cute. 378 00:21:37,008 --> 00:21:38,970 You were so handsome 379 00:21:39,387 --> 00:21:44,356 that was absolutely normal that I fell in love with you. 380 00:21:45,609 --> 00:21:48,990 It was a secret, but safe that everyone knew. 381 00:21:49,032 --> 00:21:50,769 [Walter] Of course it was a secret, because ... 382 00:21:50,811 --> 00:21:54,882 it was not allowed to have relationships with the opposite sex. 383 00:21:54,924 --> 00:21:56,380 I was ... 384 00:21:56,463 --> 00:21:57,382 Verboten. 385 00:21:57,465 --> 00:21:58,342 [Walter] Verboten. 386 00:21:58,425 --> 00:22:00,429 - Was not allowed. - No way. 387 00:22:01,014 --> 00:22:03,603 As you were in the upper room, 388 00:22:03,687 --> 00:22:05,524 you found the way 389 00:22:06,066 --> 00:22:08,028 to send me messages. 390 00:22:08,655 --> 00:22:09,615 [Walter Nothmann] It was a pulley 391 00:22:09,824 --> 00:22:12,621 made with wood, thread and a hook. 392 00:22:12,705 --> 00:22:14,876 [Dra. Ruth] And inside I put little pieces of paper for me! 393 00:22:15,001 --> 00:22:17,213 - [Walter] Yes! - [Dra. Ruth] One of the messages said ... 394 00:22:17,297 --> 00:22:19,009 You are my ray of sunshine ... 395 00:22:19,259 --> 00:22:20,386 I sang it to you. 396 00:22:20,469 --> 00:22:21,598 I want to hear it. 397 00:22:21,764 --> 00:22:23,100 [Dra. Ruth] You're my ... 398 00:22:23,184 --> 00:22:24,436 ♪ You are my ray of sunshine ♪ 399 00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:25,479 My little... 400 00:22:25,564 --> 00:22:27,358 ♪ My golden ray ♪ 401 00:22:27,442 --> 00:22:29,739 [both] You make me happy. 402 00:22:29,822 --> 00:22:31,450 - when the sky is gray. - when the sky is blue. 403 00:22:31,743 --> 00:22:33,454 [both] When the sky is gray! 404 00:22:33,538 --> 00:22:35,124 ♪ You'll never know, darling ♪ 405 00:22:35,584 --> 00:22:37,253 How much I love you. 406 00:22:37,337 --> 00:22:40,343 ♪ Please don't take my ray of sunshine ♪ 407 00:22:43,474 --> 00:22:47,148 [Walter] We were two lonely children ... 408 00:22:47,190 --> 00:22:51,365 at an age when hormones flow. 409 00:22:52,367 --> 00:22:54,789 And we learned ... 410 00:22:54,872 --> 00:22:55,874 [Dra. Ruth] Experimenting. 411 00:22:56,041 --> 00:22:57,377 [Walter] Experimenting. 412 00:22:57,795 --> 00:23:00,968 When we were teenagers, there was someone 413 00:23:01,426 --> 00:23:05,268 What did he say that he had shown you the breasts. 414 00:23:06,395 --> 00:23:08,482 And I ... [laughs] 415 00:23:09,025 --> 00:23:10,988 But that rumor was running. 416 00:23:11,071 --> 00:23:12,992 And I was horrified. 417 00:23:13,367 --> 00:23:17,710 I knew that Switzerland was surrounded by Nazis 418 00:23:18,168 --> 00:23:21,091 And if they kicked me out of Heiden 419 00:23:21,174 --> 00:23:22,176 Where was he going to go? 420 00:23:23,137 --> 00:23:25,726 There was no place in the world for me. 421 00:23:27,980 --> 00:23:32,614 So we didn't have sex, but we hug and kiss. 422 00:23:32,698 --> 00:23:34,910 And guess what? Come, I'll tell you something. 423 00:23:34,994 --> 00:23:38,877 I still remember the taste of those kisses. 424 00:23:39,085 --> 00:23:40,338 Do not tell anybody! 425 00:23:46,183 --> 00:23:48,605 [young Ruth] I read a book titled Letters for Girls. 426 00:23:49,523 --> 00:23:52,236 It was written by a doctor to educate sexually. 427 00:23:53,782 --> 00:23:57,539 In nature everything is Fantastically organized. 428 00:23:58,290 --> 00:24:01,589 You can't think of anything that is dirty. 429 00:24:06,724 --> 00:24:10,398 [male advertiser] This program contains explicit sexual language 430 00:24:10,481 --> 00:24:12,945 and it is not suitable for all audiences. 431 00:24:13,028 --> 00:24:15,700 The hostess is Dr. Ruth K. Westheimer. 432 00:24:17,078 --> 00:24:19,040 Hello, we are on the air. 433 00:24:19,332 --> 00:24:21,044 - [Sue] Hello, Dr. Ruth. - Hello. 434 00:24:21,378 --> 00:24:23,675 - My name is Sue. - Hi, Sue. 435 00:24:23,758 --> 00:24:27,098 [Sue] I have a question and I'm ashamed to do it. 436 00:24:27,558 --> 00:24:28,893 [Dra. Ruth] Take a deep breath. 437 00:24:28,977 --> 00:24:34,028 [Sue] Hey, I want to start to jerk off, okay? 438 00:24:34,237 --> 00:24:35,156 Yes. 439 00:24:36,283 --> 00:24:38,078 [Dra. Ruth] Early from the eighties ... 440 00:24:39,038 --> 00:24:39,957 [Janet] Go ahead! 441 00:24:40,040 --> 00:24:42,963 [Dra. Ruth] ... people didn't speak of female sexuality. 442 00:24:43,464 --> 00:24:45,510 Now, Janet, we live in the eighties ... 443 00:24:45,594 --> 00:24:46,512 THREE ARE COMPANY 1984 444 00:24:46,596 --> 00:24:48,850 ... and I think I can be perfectly frank. 445 00:24:49,685 --> 00:24:54,737 To begin with, the men we have certain needs. 446 00:24:54,987 --> 00:24:56,991 [audience laughs] 447 00:24:58,202 --> 00:24:59,412 The women too. 448 00:25:00,289 --> 00:25:02,544 - Yes? - [laughs] 449 00:25:03,170 --> 00:25:08,388 [Dra. Ruth] They still believed not only they didn't talk about sex, 450 00:25:08,472 --> 00:25:10,936 but women didn't enjoy it. 451 00:25:11,019 --> 00:25:12,648 [man] When a woman is frigid, the thing is... 452 00:25:12,731 --> 00:25:15,904 Oh moment! You can not say that word on my show. 453 00:25:17,156 --> 00:25:18,993 There are no frigid women 454 00:25:19,077 --> 00:25:24,838 there are women who must learn to be receptive. 455 00:25:24,922 --> 00:25:30,850 Can you take it by the hand and show him how you want to be touched, 456 00:25:31,434 --> 00:25:36,486 how can you receive pleasure, to be, uh, happy? 457 00:25:36,737 --> 00:25:37,906 That's what I'm looking for. 458 00:25:37,990 --> 00:25:40,119 It doesn't have to be with words it has to be something ... 459 00:25:40,202 --> 00:25:41,496 Well, men, normally, they don't care, right? 460 00:25:41,581 --> 00:25:42,498 That is not like that. 461 00:25:42,583 --> 00:25:46,006 Julie, it's very important to you, young people are watching you. 462 00:25:46,381 --> 00:25:51,224 It is important to say that the majority of men care a lot. 463 00:25:51,308 --> 00:25:54,188 Some, neither you nor Andy, but some men, 464 00:25:55,190 --> 00:25:58,155 they say if they don't receive What they want... 465 00:25:58,238 --> 00:26:00,075 - Yes. - ... there is a word for that, 466 00:26:00,159 --> 00:26:01,328 the word is ... 467 00:26:01,411 --> 00:26:02,748 [Conan] Give what are you talking now 468 00:26:02,831 --> 00:26:04,042 - [censored] fucking. - [Conan O'Brien] What? 469 00:26:04,125 --> 00:26:05,545 - [censored] Cojonera. Say it. - [audience laughs] 470 00:26:05,712 --> 00:26:07,799 I'm not going to ... I'm not going to say that. 471 00:26:08,258 --> 00:26:11,014 No, I won't say that, no! 472 00:26:11,348 --> 00:26:14,479 [Dra. Ruth] I was frustrated that the term existed cojonera 473 00:26:14,563 --> 00:26:18,195 and there was nothing for women who did not reach orgasm. 474 00:26:18,613 --> 00:26:21,201 We should coin a new term, 475 00:26:21,284 --> 00:26:25,042 so that she could say: "Honey, I need something more 476 00:26:25,125 --> 00:26:26,545 that hugs, kisses and touches. " 477 00:26:26,587 --> 00:26:29,092 - [Conan O'Brien] Yes. - The term could be vaginera . 478 00:26:29,258 --> 00:26:31,096 - [laughs] - So, now... 479 00:26:34,352 --> 00:26:36,649 but ... but I'll tell you. 480 00:26:37,943 --> 00:26:40,949 [applause and celebrations] 481 00:26:41,659 --> 00:26:47,504 [Dr. Ruth] It has a bit to do with my need to make decisions 482 00:26:47,754 --> 00:26:53,056 the idea that women take the initiative 483 00:26:53,140 --> 00:26:57,398 and take responsibility for themselves 484 00:26:57,481 --> 00:26:59,570 and his own sexuality. 485 00:27:00,237 --> 00:27:03,201 I admired you for a long time 486 00:27:03,661 --> 00:27:09,046 and part of what you've done really allowed women like myself 487 00:27:09,130 --> 00:27:13,096 speak openly and be decisive 488 00:27:13,180 --> 00:27:16,812 to talk about topics like sex. 489 00:27:16,896 --> 00:27:19,192 Well it's something we're doing all together, it seems to me. 490 00:27:19,651 --> 00:27:22,741 I never heard women before tell the truth about sex in public. 491 00:27:27,834 --> 00:27:29,505 [Miriam] You once told me that ... 492 00:27:29,588 --> 00:27:31,216 that you raised me with certain values but I took them too far. 493 00:27:31,299 --> 00:27:32,384 DAUGHTER OF DR. RUTH 494 00:27:32,468 --> 00:27:36,560 You wanted me to be a feminist but you said that at dinner, 495 00:27:36,644 --> 00:27:39,023 let the man pay occasionally. 496 00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:41,612 You don't always have to pay yourself. 497 00:27:42,822 --> 00:27:46,246 Oh you know what you give me things who talk about feminism? 498 00:27:46,329 --> 00:27:47,414 GRANDDAUGHTER OF DR. RUTH 499 00:27:47,498 --> 00:27:49,586 - Are you a feminist? - [Dra. Ruth] Nope. 500 00:27:49,670 --> 00:27:52,634 - Because? - I'm old-fashioned and square. 501 00:27:52,717 --> 00:27:56,642 Don't you think men and women should we have equal rights? 502 00:27:56,934 --> 00:27:58,646 - Yes. - [Miriam] Does the same pay? 503 00:27:58,729 --> 00:28:00,482 Sure you do, it still pays. 504 00:28:01,317 --> 00:28:03,405 What about abortion? Should women decide? 505 00:28:03,488 --> 00:28:04,908 [Dra. Ruth] Sure. I already told. 506 00:28:04,992 --> 00:28:05,994 Okay, so you are a feminist. 507 00:28:06,202 --> 00:28:07,329 [Dra. Ruth] No, I already said ... 508 00:28:07,413 --> 00:28:10,545 I recently asked him, You know, if she was a feminist. 509 00:28:10,837 --> 00:28:14,093 And she said no and I got very angry. 510 00:28:14,176 --> 00:28:17,517 Everything she does is what feminists do. 511 00:28:17,601 --> 00:28:21,775 Talk about family planning, support gay rights, 512 00:28:21,859 --> 00:28:24,113 AIDS research, right to decide. 513 00:28:24,196 --> 00:28:26,619 But she doesn't consider herself a feminist. 514 00:28:26,702 --> 00:28:29,625 [Miriam] In our language, they would clearly call you a feminist. 515 00:28:29,708 --> 00:28:33,883 What you reject is activism, the protest, you know ... 516 00:28:33,966 --> 00:28:35,469 - [Leora] Burning bras. - The burning of bras. 517 00:28:35,553 --> 00:28:37,724 I don't want to talk about burnt bras. 518 00:28:38,099 --> 00:28:42,316 But I think people see you as a feminist role model. 519 00:28:43,026 --> 00:28:45,865 OK, it's OK, I don't want them to change what they think. 520 00:28:45,948 --> 00:28:48,119 - [Leora] Fine, but ... - I brought you a hat, okay? 521 00:28:48,203 --> 00:28:51,459 [Leora] Yes, but instead to give me things that say "feminist" 522 00:28:51,543 --> 00:28:52,962 you should keep them for yourself. 523 00:28:53,923 --> 00:28:56,512 - Just say it. "I am a feminist." - Not. 524 00:28:57,889 --> 00:28:59,100 - [Dra. Ruth] But I love you. - [Miriam] Say "I'm not a ..." 525 00:28:59,183 --> 00:29:00,561 "I am not a radical feminist." 526 00:29:00,645 --> 00:29:05,153 "I am not a radical feminist" and I love my granddaughter. 527 00:29:28,366 --> 00:29:31,497 [Dra. Ruth] Once, when I was already in the orphanage, 528 00:29:31,957 --> 00:29:36,967 my father was allowed return from labor camp to Frankfurt. 529 00:29:38,094 --> 00:29:44,064 The war had started and it was a place very dangerous for my parents. 530 00:29:45,025 --> 00:29:48,323 But they never wrote about sadness 531 00:29:48,406 --> 00:29:52,080 in the letters he received every week. 532 00:29:54,711 --> 00:29:58,176 I saved each of them. 533 00:30:08,196 --> 00:30:09,699 [mother] My dear Karola, 534 00:30:10,576 --> 00:30:14,041 your beautiful letter of December 15 arrived today. 535 00:30:15,001 --> 00:30:20,095 Surely your Hanukkah party it will be finished. Was it pretty? 536 00:30:21,305 --> 00:30:25,731 We haven't heard from Uncle Max. We hope to hear from you soon. 537 00:30:26,984 --> 00:30:30,448 I wish you, my darling, the warmest regards. 538 00:30:31,033 --> 00:30:34,039 Loving kisses from your dear mother. 539 00:30:36,294 --> 00:30:39,968 [Dra. Ruth] The letters gave me much hope and joy. 540 00:30:42,599 --> 00:30:47,650 Almost all of my father's letters they were in poem form. 541 00:30:49,529 --> 00:30:55,248 [father] Dear Karola, a good verse You must know well, it takes a lot of effort. 542 00:30:55,625 --> 00:30:59,841 Maybe one day I can teach you so that you can also rhyme. 543 00:31:01,135 --> 00:31:05,393 It's easier to say in a poem what it costs to say in prose. 544 00:31:06,103 --> 00:31:11,030 And think about this. If you were at home, you wouldn't have letters. 545 00:31:13,827 --> 00:31:18,044 [young Ruth] I'm in the eighth grade now and next spring I will finish school. 546 00:31:19,088 --> 00:31:21,217 Hopefully I can continue my education 547 00:31:21,300 --> 00:31:25,100 because for my future profession It would be great to go to school. 548 00:31:25,935 --> 00:31:28,941 But the girls from the orphanage they can't go to high school. 549 00:31:32,155 --> 00:31:33,575 [Dra. Ruth] Of all of us, 550 00:31:34,034 --> 00:31:37,416 you were the smartest, even smarter than me. 551 00:31:38,126 --> 00:31:41,925 Your influence on me it had to do with your intellect. 552 00:31:42,719 --> 00:31:45,098 - Maybe. - No, this is very serious. 553 00:31:45,181 --> 00:31:47,060 You're lucky because ... 554 00:31:47,520 --> 00:31:51,653 they let you go to the village school ... 555 00:31:52,029 --> 00:31:53,364 - Yes. -... and not me. 556 00:31:53,782 --> 00:31:55,493 - It is right. - Because the girls 557 00:31:55,578 --> 00:31:58,751 - they had to be maids ... - It is right. 558 00:31:58,834 --> 00:32:04,178 ... but my father wanted me to learn. Nobody takes away your knowledge. 559 00:32:07,602 --> 00:32:11,233 Walter went to school during the day. 560 00:32:12,235 --> 00:32:14,908 him At night he would hide under my bed 561 00:32:15,534 --> 00:32:20,961 and he took the books to rest of the staircase, where there was light 562 00:32:21,755 --> 00:32:26,556 and could read history, language and geography. 563 00:32:27,767 --> 00:32:29,436 What were you doing under the bed? 564 00:32:29,687 --> 00:32:30,606 Tremble. 565 00:32:30,689 --> 00:32:32,150 - Tremble? - Yes. 566 00:32:32,234 --> 00:32:35,448 I was afraid of being caught. 567 00:32:37,285 --> 00:32:41,085 A few times Riesenfeld came 568 00:32:41,168 --> 00:32:43,590 Let's see if everything was fine ... 569 00:32:43,674 --> 00:32:45,009 [Dra. Ruth laughs] 570 00:32:45,093 --> 00:32:47,515 ... and I was under the bed, afraid he would look. 571 00:32:48,892 --> 00:32:52,650 What I learned in the day 572 00:32:53,777 --> 00:32:55,698 she taught him at night. 573 00:32:56,282 --> 00:32:58,286 He transferred the knowledge, 574 00:32:58,745 --> 00:33:00,666 but she absorbed it. 575 00:33:01,041 --> 00:33:03,672 If you are not smart, you can't do it. 576 00:33:07,972 --> 00:33:09,391 [Dra. Ruth] I am very grateful to Switzerland. 577 00:33:09,851 --> 00:33:13,107 They gave me a roof and food 578 00:33:14,276 --> 00:33:17,575 but I also know that they used to people like Riesenfeld, 579 00:33:18,034 --> 00:33:20,956 to run the orphanage. Stupid. 580 00:33:21,541 --> 00:33:25,799 Instead of saying: "Your parents sacrificed 581 00:33:26,509 --> 00:33:29,974 his only girl to save her ", 582 00:33:30,058 --> 00:33:33,732 said our parents they didn't love us. 583 00:33:34,149 --> 00:33:37,155 That having had a child she would never have left him. 584 00:33:38,324 --> 00:33:40,955 There are some things that I cannot forgive. 585 00:33:47,217 --> 00:33:49,806 [young Ruth] I turned thirteen yesterday. 586 00:33:49,889 --> 00:33:53,522 They allowed me to go with the older girls to the village pool. 587 00:33:54,398 --> 00:33:57,028 I can jump now of the three-meter springboard. 588 00:33:57,530 --> 00:33:59,491 [water noise] 589 00:33:59,951 --> 00:34:01,328 [mother] My dear Karola, 590 00:34:01,871 --> 00:34:05,253 I look forward to the day so I can read your journal. 591 00:34:05,796 --> 00:34:08,677 I hope you grow up to become in a capable young woman, 592 00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:11,098 always healthy and happy. 593 00:34:11,725 --> 00:34:13,895 Your birthday present will come later. 594 00:34:14,354 --> 00:34:16,400 It may take a while. 595 00:34:17,110 --> 00:34:21,368 [Dra. Ruth] I realized it for the first time that something horrible had happened 596 00:34:21,911 --> 00:34:23,255 when the letters no longer arrived. 597 00:34:28,550 --> 00:34:29,969 [Young Ruth] It's been almost seven weeks 598 00:34:30,053 --> 00:34:32,767 no letters from my parents or grandmother. 599 00:34:36,023 --> 00:34:40,114 Today is already nine weeks and one day no letters from my parents. 600 00:34:43,287 --> 00:34:48,005 I am here for three years. I must go to bed. 601 00:34:48,882 --> 00:34:54,727 Good night mom, dad, and all my relatives. 602 00:34:58,985 --> 00:35:02,952 Yesterday I helped pick up twelve children who entered Switzerland illegally. 603 00:35:03,912 --> 00:35:06,960 A girl from Hungary told us all the suffering she saw. 604 00:35:08,505 --> 00:35:13,055 Mass deaths, gas chambers and other horrible things. 605 00:35:16,646 --> 00:35:20,361 It's been more than five years no news from my family. 606 00:35:21,405 --> 00:35:24,327 I would very much like to revive the days with my parents, 607 00:35:25,037 --> 00:35:27,167 I didn't know what they meant to me. 608 00:35:28,545 --> 00:35:30,298 I know I shouldn't lose hope, 609 00:35:30,716 --> 00:35:34,097 but it's not easy to believe I'll see you again. 610 00:35:47,833 --> 00:35:48,710 WNYC RADIO 611 00:35:48,794 --> 00:35:52,217 [Melissa] I have great respect for you and I'm glad to have you here. 612 00:35:52,467 --> 00:35:55,599 [Dra. Ruth] Thank you. Very well! 613 00:35:56,893 --> 00:35:58,855 Dr. Ruth, it's great to see you. 614 00:35:58,939 --> 00:36:00,526 [Dra. Ruth] A pleasure, I've heard of you. 615 00:36:04,909 --> 00:36:09,000 We're back. It's noon at WNYC, i am jonathan capehart 616 00:36:09,585 --> 00:36:11,463 and I'm talking to the iconic 617 00:36:11,548 --> 00:36:14,427 world famous sex therapist and as a couple, Dr. Ruth Westheimer. 618 00:36:14,512 --> 00:36:15,388 JOURNALIST 619 00:36:15,471 --> 00:36:16,891 - In her last book ... - [Dra. Ruth] Wait a minute, Jonathan. 620 00:36:16,975 --> 00:36:17,935 Jonathan, wait. 621 00:36:18,018 --> 00:36:21,191 - [Jonathan] Yes, ma'am. - Say the word "sex" with more emotion. 622 00:36:21,275 --> 00:36:22,318 [nervous laugh] 623 00:36:22,402 --> 00:36:25,324 [Dra. Ruth] Say the word "sex" as if he cares. 624 00:36:25,408 --> 00:36:26,870 - [Jonathan] Okay. - With heat, 625 00:36:27,287 --> 00:36:29,499 with excitement, with incitement. 626 00:36:29,959 --> 00:36:31,880 - [Dra. Ruth] Start over. - Well, yes, ma'am. 627 00:36:32,673 --> 00:36:34,844 [Jonathan] Hey, I'm talking with the iconic, 628 00:36:34,927 --> 00:36:39,060 world renowned sex therapist and as a couple, Dr. Ruth Westheimer. 629 00:36:39,144 --> 00:36:40,062 How's it going? 630 00:36:40,146 --> 00:36:41,566 - It was wonderful. - [laughs] 631 00:36:41,858 --> 00:36:44,112 I want to thank you personally, Dr. Ruth. 632 00:36:44,655 --> 00:36:48,914 I grew up as a young gay listening to it on the radio 633 00:36:48,997 --> 00:36:52,462 and it was wonderful to hear someone saying positive things 634 00:36:52,546 --> 00:36:56,261 about that aspect of my life, which I was trying to accept. 635 00:36:56,763 --> 00:37:02,357 Dr. Ruth, you wrote that you hate the word "normal". 636 00:37:02,440 --> 00:37:03,442 - Correct. - Because? 637 00:37:03,777 --> 00:37:05,321 Because we do not know what is normal. 638 00:37:05,404 --> 00:37:08,995 And I want to say something about what you said, Jonathan. 639 00:37:09,371 --> 00:37:13,964 In those days, in 1981, when I started on WYNY ... 640 00:37:14,214 --> 00:37:15,717 - If right. - ... Speaking of Sex , 641 00:37:16,093 --> 00:37:19,099 no one was talking about homosexuality. 642 00:37:19,767 --> 00:37:22,982 The only thing I ever did 643 00:37:23,482 --> 00:37:26,656 that is to say that respect it is not a matter of debate. 644 00:37:27,240 --> 00:37:29,578 There is no normal. 645 00:37:30,204 --> 00:37:33,293 Look, we have a call from Brooklyn. Michelle. 646 00:37:34,045 --> 00:37:37,553 [Michelle] When I was a teenager she in the eighties she listened to her, 647 00:37:37,636 --> 00:37:40,057 and there is a lot of shame around sex. 648 00:37:40,141 --> 00:37:43,940 And the sight of her without judgment of her saved my life. 649 00:37:44,190 --> 00:37:47,238 - Oh, good to hear that. - [Michelle] Thank you, you are an angel. 650 00:37:47,405 --> 00:37:50,036 I'm glad to hear that, I agree to be an angel 651 00:37:50,119 --> 00:37:52,875 I am a Jewish angel, great. Thanks. 652 00:37:52,958 --> 00:37:55,129 You know, thinking of Michelle, 653 00:37:55,212 --> 00:37:58,887 What does it feel like people that he has never seen 654 00:37:58,970 --> 00:38:02,101 tell you things ranging from thank you 655 00:38:02,185 --> 00:38:04,648 to "did you save my life?" 656 00:38:04,732 --> 00:38:07,571 As she knows, I'm five foot four, 657 00:38:08,489 --> 00:38:11,954 And I feel like five foot three. 658 00:38:12,748 --> 00:38:15,796 But I can't sit down to say I've done a good job. 659 00:38:16,296 --> 00:38:17,465 We must continue ... 660 00:38:17,966 --> 00:38:20,514 ... speaking of sexual problems, 661 00:38:20,889 --> 00:38:24,772 and the problems of sexually transmitted diseases. 662 00:38:28,780 --> 00:38:31,619 Today we will talk about something very serious. 663 00:38:31,702 --> 00:38:34,625 We will talk about the AIDS health crisis 664 00:38:34,708 --> 00:38:39,844 and about how it particularly affects to the homosexual community. 665 00:38:41,138 --> 00:38:43,768 [Tom Brokaw] The scientists from the center for disease control 666 00:38:43,852 --> 00:38:46,649 Atlanta showed today the results of a study 667 00:38:46,983 --> 00:38:49,362 showing that the lifestyle of certain homosexual men ... 668 00:38:49,445 --> 00:38:51,074 CANCER STUDY GAY CANCER 669 00:38:51,158 --> 00:38:53,830 ... has triggered an epidemic from a rare form of cancer. 670 00:38:54,707 --> 00:38:57,546 [Dra. Ruth] It was a very unpopular topic ... 671 00:38:57,963 --> 00:38:58,923 AIDS KILLS QUARANTINE TO THE WEIRD 672 00:38:59,007 --> 00:39:01,804 ... because then the gay they were not only a minority, 673 00:39:02,013 --> 00:39:03,098 but they were despised. 674 00:39:03,182 --> 00:39:04,100 QUARANTINE IN MANHATTAN ... ... WORLD'S CAPITAL OF AIDS! 675 00:39:04,184 --> 00:39:06,814 [Billy Graham] It could be a judgment from God about us, 676 00:39:07,231 --> 00:39:12,200 in return for our promiscuous society and our free living system. 677 00:39:13,076 --> 00:39:16,458 When we violate God's laws, we pay for it with our body. 678 00:39:18,003 --> 00:39:18,922 BELIEVE IN THE GOSPEL! 679 00:39:19,005 --> 00:39:20,466 [Dra. Ruth] I took it very seriously 680 00:39:20,550 --> 00:39:23,806 for my past as a refugee German Jewry. 681 00:39:23,890 --> 00:39:25,977 JUDÍA RESIDENTIAL AREA NO PASSING 682 00:39:26,269 --> 00:39:29,818 Clearly, she had sensitivity 683 00:39:29,902 --> 00:39:33,325 for the people that others they considered sub-human. 684 00:39:33,743 --> 00:39:34,912 [male listener] Hello, Dr. Ruth. 685 00:39:34,995 --> 00:39:38,503 I have a girlfriend with a lot from gay friends. 686 00:39:38,586 --> 00:39:40,799 He smokes their cigarettes 687 00:39:40,882 --> 00:39:43,178 and drink their coffees and cocas and eats his sandwiches. 688 00:39:43,262 --> 00:39:46,686 Can I get AIDS? Because I am, you know, 689 00:39:46,769 --> 00:39:49,399 a healthy man, and I don't want to getting AIDS from my girlfriend, 690 00:39:49,692 --> 00:39:51,403 that she goes around with homosexuals. 691 00:39:52,071 --> 00:39:53,115 AIDS. WE NEED RESEARCH, NOT HYSTERY. 692 00:39:53,198 --> 00:39:55,244 [John] Dr. Ruth's program reached a peak of popularity 693 00:39:55,327 --> 00:39:57,541 when the AIDS crisis hit. 694 00:39:58,918 --> 00:40:02,718 It was a sad time. People were dying everywhere ... 695 00:40:02,801 --> 00:40:03,720 AIDS DISASTER AREA 696 00:40:03,803 --> 00:40:04,888 PEOPLE LIVING WITH AIDS 697 00:40:04,972 --> 00:40:08,646 ... and we were right in the middle, doing a sexuality show. 698 00:40:09,188 --> 00:40:13,990 [Dra. Ruth] Some people are attracted to it people of the same sex, 699 00:40:14,073 --> 00:40:16,494 and I strongly believe 700 00:40:16,579 --> 00:40:18,958 that we, as a society, 701 00:40:19,042 --> 00:40:23,383 we owe it to those people all our respect. 702 00:40:24,302 --> 00:40:25,555 [man] I'm angry, doctor. 703 00:40:25,764 --> 00:40:27,893 - [Dra. Ruth] Why is he angry? - I think everyone should be. 704 00:40:27,976 --> 00:40:32,276 I see people who die alone without their families. 705 00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:35,491 And I see pity. There is a lot of sorrow ... 706 00:40:35,575 --> 00:40:39,541 This is ... this is a virus. This is an epidemic. 707 00:40:39,625 --> 00:40:43,465 It seems that the largest proportion of people dying 708 00:40:43,549 --> 00:40:45,344 and succumb to the AIDS virus 709 00:40:45,427 --> 00:40:49,102 they are part of the homosexual community, and injecting drug addicts 710 00:40:49,185 --> 00:40:54,655 I don't waste a moment of my time in blaming one or the other group. 711 00:40:54,738 --> 00:40:58,370 I say: let's educate and find the cure. 712 00:40:59,205 --> 00:41:01,376 [Greg] How was the therapist America's most famous sex ... 713 00:41:01,459 --> 00:41:02,420 GREG WILLENBORG'S VOICE TELEVISION PRODUCER 714 00:41:02,504 --> 00:41:03,673 ... people trusted her. 715 00:41:04,382 --> 00:41:09,058 And she started to bring about a change on the look at HIV and AIDS. 716 00:41:09,726 --> 00:41:11,522 [Dra. Ruth] What makes me sad 717 00:41:12,566 --> 00:41:16,657 is that AIDS is still very important. 718 00:41:17,074 --> 00:41:19,287 So you must be careful, 719 00:41:19,663 --> 00:41:21,332 they must know who they are going with. 720 00:41:21,584 --> 00:41:25,466 And they have to ... if they don't know a lot to the person, 721 00:41:25,550 --> 00:41:26,760 use condoms. 722 00:41:29,641 --> 00:41:32,856 I have many friends who died of that horrible disease. 723 00:41:34,902 --> 00:41:37,323 But I'm always optimistic. 724 00:41:37,949 --> 00:41:41,540 And I still believe there will be a cure. 725 00:41:44,003 --> 00:41:46,842 HAIFA, ISRAEL 726 00:41:52,646 --> 00:41:54,398 [Marga speaks in Hebrew] Here it is! 727 00:41:55,400 --> 00:41:57,404 Did you have a drink before you came? 728 00:41:58,448 --> 00:41:59,450 [Dra. Ruth] Shalom! 729 00:41:59,535 --> 00:42:00,787 CHILDHOOD FRIEND OF DR. RUTH 730 00:42:02,551 --> 00:42:04,795 [Loam] You have horrible hair 731 00:42:04,878 --> 00:42:06,256 you have to go to the hairdresser. 732 00:42:06,339 --> 00:42:09,638 - Is it very horrible? - Yes, you look horrible. 733 00:42:09,721 --> 00:42:13,270 But they did my hair the other day. 734 00:42:17,529 --> 00:42:21,662 [in English] I don't have time for hairdressers, but my best friend 735 00:42:22,121 --> 00:42:26,880 she already complains about the look of my hair. Well. 736 00:42:31,974 --> 00:42:35,444 [Loam] It was May 8, 45. 737 00:42:36,024 --> 00:42:36,942 I was... 738 00:42:37,026 --> 00:42:38,069 [speaks German] 739 00:42:38,153 --> 00:42:39,740 [Dra. Ruth in English] I was peeling potatoes. 740 00:42:39,823 --> 00:42:42,871 [Marga] ... peeling potatoes for the entire orphanage. 741 00:42:43,914 --> 00:42:45,793 And I heard the war was over. 742 00:42:45,877 --> 00:42:50,093 - [radio static] - [man speaking German] 743 00:42:51,930 --> 00:42:54,018 My first thought was ... 744 00:42:54,895 --> 00:42:58,258 What will happen to my parents? 745 00:42:59,071 --> 00:43:03,286 [Dra. Ruth] The orphanage received the list of survivors 746 00:43:04,121 --> 00:43:07,671 but instead of calling to children individually, 747 00:43:08,380 --> 00:43:10,258 they sat us together 748 00:43:10,635 --> 00:43:12,889 and read it for everyone. 749 00:43:14,016 --> 00:43:16,980 My family was not on any list. 750 00:43:18,651 --> 00:43:22,449 We were worried about knowing what would happen to us. 751 00:43:23,076 --> 00:43:24,286 Now what? 752 00:43:25,790 --> 00:43:29,422 We were no longer Germans. We were never Swiss. 753 00:43:30,633 --> 00:43:33,931 They put us on a train. 754 00:43:34,891 --> 00:43:39,860 and we saw another train full of Nazis. 755 00:43:40,778 --> 00:43:44,953 Those German prisoners They looked out the windows. 756 00:43:45,036 --> 00:43:49,546 And I remember thinking: "Maybe you killed my family." 757 00:43:52,259 --> 00:43:53,929 When we arrived in Marseille, 758 00:43:54,305 --> 00:43:56,392 I had never seen the sea. 759 00:43:56,894 --> 00:44:00,025 - Not. - I thought, "Oh, God, 760 00:44:00,108 --> 00:44:01,152 check it out. 761 00:44:02,404 --> 00:44:06,830 Little Karola Siegel, seventeen years old, from Frankfurt am Main 762 00:44:07,582 --> 00:44:10,253 she is going by boat to Palestine. " 763 00:44:12,341 --> 00:44:13,969 We went to a Kibbutz, 764 00:44:14,513 --> 00:44:17,560 what is a settlement collective for Jews. 765 00:44:18,521 --> 00:44:21,108 There was a lot of hatred towards Germany, 766 00:44:21,192 --> 00:44:25,618 with reasons. So people who was responsible for us told me: 767 00:44:25,701 --> 00:44:29,124 "You can't call yourself Karola anymore. She is very German. " 768 00:44:29,626 --> 00:44:35,428 And I said that if it couldn't be Karola I would use my middle name Ruth 769 00:44:36,222 --> 00:44:40,982 because I believed with hope 770 00:44:41,315 --> 00:44:44,321 that if someone in my family was still alive, 771 00:44:44,698 --> 00:44:47,119 I would know that was my middle name. 772 00:44:47,202 --> 00:44:49,373 They would come and find me. 773 00:44:51,168 --> 00:44:55,010 KIBBUTZ RAMAT DAVID, ISRAEL 774 00:44:59,519 --> 00:45:00,813 [cow mooing] 775 00:45:01,147 --> 00:45:02,274 [Dra. Ruth] Muuu! 776 00:45:03,151 --> 00:45:04,236 They are beautiful. 777 00:45:07,034 --> 00:45:08,161 Loam, 778 00:45:09,121 --> 00:45:14,507 This reminds me of my first night 779 00:45:16,595 --> 00:45:18,807 His name was Kalman. 780 00:45:19,976 --> 00:45:22,815 He was very handsome. 781 00:45:23,567 --> 00:45:25,028 he was in the army 782 00:45:25,403 --> 00:45:28,619 and I was visiting his brother Shaul, 783 00:45:29,328 --> 00:45:30,706 that he was my boyfriend. 784 00:45:32,459 --> 00:45:35,340 But only from kissing and hugging. 785 00:45:36,593 --> 00:45:38,054 [man] Were you dating her brother? 786 00:45:38,137 --> 00:45:40,559 You ask such stupid questions! 787 00:45:40,977 --> 00:45:43,439 Yes, but I said goodbye to Shaul. 788 00:45:43,524 --> 00:45:46,320 And I went with his younger brother, Kalman. 789 00:45:47,364 --> 00:45:50,538 Shaul told his brother: 790 00:45:51,707 --> 00:45:53,418 "Take good care of her." 791 00:45:53,919 --> 00:45:55,338 [speaking Hebrew] Take good care of her. 792 00:45:58,721 --> 00:46:01,475 [in English] I knew I should go to a private place, 793 00:46:02,227 --> 00:46:07,697 so Kalman and I went to a haystack like this, upstairs. 794 00:46:12,205 --> 00:46:16,965 That was my first night of real sex. 795 00:46:17,675 --> 00:46:18,761 Is it a nice memory? 796 00:46:19,136 --> 00:46:20,263 It is a nice memory. 797 00:46:22,392 --> 00:46:23,937 [Dra. Ruth] It was a youthful love, 798 00:46:24,480 --> 00:46:28,989 but like many young loves, I had no future. 799 00:46:30,283 --> 00:46:36,003 A few months later she told me: "we have to end the relationship." 800 00:46:36,922 --> 00:46:39,343 I wanted us to be together forever. 801 00:46:40,261 --> 00:46:44,019 He did not want to. He said it would be a burden. 802 00:46:46,190 --> 00:46:47,985 [Young Ruth] Why did this have to happen? 803 00:46:48,654 --> 00:46:50,950 I gave him all the love I could 804 00:46:51,283 --> 00:46:54,541 but she took everything and gave me nothing. 805 00:46:56,377 --> 00:47:00,553 One word comes to me all the time: single. 806 00:47:01,930 --> 00:47:07,023 I am so alone in this world. I miss my parents terribly. 807 00:47:16,208 --> 00:47:19,381 YAD VASHEM WORLD HOLOCAUST MEMORY CENTER 808 00:47:33,242 --> 00:47:36,248 [Dra. Ruth] The Nazis wore detailed records. 809 00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:42,219 And for many years no one wanted to see head on 810 00:47:42,803 --> 00:47:44,431 what happened to my parents. 811 00:47:45,935 --> 00:47:48,272 But as difficult as it is for me, 812 00:47:48,815 --> 00:47:54,493 I have the obligation to know what was the fate of my family. 813 00:47:57,290 --> 00:47:58,334 SON OF DR. RUTH 814 00:47:58,417 --> 00:48:01,591 I was thinking, you know, when my parents told me about the holocaust, 815 00:48:01,675 --> 00:48:04,221 or when my mother told me 816 00:48:04,597 --> 00:48:07,435 that she never saw her parents again from the age of 10. 817 00:48:08,396 --> 00:48:12,989 I have no memory of some moments. 818 00:48:14,116 --> 00:48:17,999 [Miriam] When I grew up, I realized that she had no maternal grandparents. 819 00:48:18,917 --> 00:48:21,798 So she asked him, and she answered me. 820 00:48:22,550 --> 00:48:25,973 But my mother didn't give me information. 821 00:48:26,933 --> 00:48:29,647 [Simmy] Good, What is her maiden name? 822 00:48:29,731 --> 00:48:33,446 Siegel, S ‐ I ‐ E ‐ G ‐ E ‐ L. 823 00:48:33,905 --> 00:48:34,949 COMMUNICATIONS DIVISION 824 00:48:35,033 --> 00:48:36,578 We have a lot of Siegels here. 825 00:48:37,078 --> 00:48:39,458 Find Julius Siegel. 826 00:48:40,544 --> 00:48:44,635 - Julius? - Yes, my father, Julius. That's him. 827 00:48:45,261 --> 00:48:50,063 - What does he say? List of...? - List of murdered Jews in Germany. 828 00:48:50,731 --> 00:48:53,570 [Dra. Ruth] she died in Auschwitz. 1942. 829 00:48:55,239 --> 00:48:56,200 Oh boy 830 00:48:57,828 --> 00:49:00,626 My mother's name was Hanauer. 831 00:49:01,001 --> 00:49:02,045 Irma. 832 00:49:04,299 --> 00:49:05,385 [humming] 833 00:49:06,763 --> 00:49:08,600 - This too... - Oh, that's it! 834 00:49:09,101 --> 00:49:10,813 - Neither Hanauer, she's that. - Not Hanauer. 835 00:49:10,896 --> 00:49:13,985 - What does it say? She was born in ... - He was born in Wiesenfield ... 836 00:49:14,069 --> 00:49:17,450 - I was also born in Wiesenfield. Yes. - ... Germany, in 1903. 837 00:49:17,535 --> 00:49:21,375 - Part of the war lived in ... - Frankfurt am Main, Germany. 838 00:49:21,458 --> 00:49:23,505 During the war he was in the Litzmann Ghetto. 839 00:49:23,588 --> 00:49:25,174 [Dra. Ruth] Right, And nobody knows what happened? 840 00:49:25,258 --> 00:49:27,053 [Simmy] Irma was killed in the holocaust, 841 00:49:27,137 --> 00:49:29,474 - but there is no specific location. - [Dra. Ruth] There is no location. 842 00:49:33,023 --> 00:49:34,151 Oh boy 843 00:49:35,445 --> 00:49:36,573 Sad. 844 00:49:38,200 --> 00:49:41,373 My mother has no date of death, 845 00:49:42,125 --> 00:49:45,924 she just says "verschollen" which is a horrible word. 846 00:49:46,008 --> 00:49:47,970 Verschollen means missing, 847 00:49:48,220 --> 00:49:51,644 as if she had disappeared from the world. 848 00:49:52,312 --> 00:49:56,988 She was killed somewhere but nobody knows, nobody knows where, 849 00:49:57,698 --> 00:49:58,658 nothing. 850 00:49:58,742 --> 00:50:04,002 I know my father was killed at Auschwitz, and the date. 851 00:50:05,254 --> 00:50:07,927 - You're recording, Ruth. - Ruth K. 852 00:50:08,010 --> 00:50:09,805 The K is for Karola. 853 00:50:10,641 --> 00:50:12,352 - I am... - [Simmy] You were a survivor. 854 00:50:12,686 --> 00:50:14,439 [Dra. Ruth] My name is not myself a survivor. 855 00:50:14,524 --> 00:50:18,698 I call myself an orphan of the Holocaust, 856 00:50:18,782 --> 00:50:21,788 because I was not in a field but I survived. 857 00:50:37,402 --> 00:50:41,118 Thank you all for keeping it alive the memory of the Holocaust. 858 00:50:42,245 --> 00:50:47,213 If they hadn't sent me to Switzerland I wouldn't be alive today. 859 00:50:48,382 --> 00:50:51,263 I'll cry later, when no one is around. 860 00:50:51,764 --> 00:50:54,854 The Yekkes, German Jews, they don't cry in public. 861 00:50:55,856 --> 00:50:57,610 Dr. Ruth K. Westheimer. 862 00:51:01,784 --> 00:51:06,126 [Miriam] I think the trauma for that unimaginable loss of her parents 863 00:51:06,753 --> 00:51:10,343 she reconfigured her entire emotional map. 864 00:51:12,305 --> 00:51:14,935 And she doesn't allow herself, 865 00:51:15,646 --> 00:51:17,691 you know, that deep cry 866 00:51:17,775 --> 00:51:20,781 what do you let go when you free yourself of a very great pain. 867 00:51:21,741 --> 00:51:25,456 I don't know if she ever had that. 868 00:51:31,719 --> 00:51:35,434 YAVNE, ISRAEL 869 00:51:40,737 --> 00:51:43,993 I will go no further there is a warning about a dog. 870 00:51:44,077 --> 00:51:45,079 [Ryan] There are no dogs. 871 00:51:46,916 --> 00:51:49,588 - No dog? How do you know? - [Ryan] There isn't. I just came in. 872 00:51:49,839 --> 00:51:51,718 [Ryan laughs] 873 00:51:53,847 --> 00:51:55,892 [Dra. Ruth] I don't trust anyone. 874 00:51:57,103 --> 00:51:58,147 - Shalom! - [in Hebrew] 875 00:51:58,230 --> 00:51:59,149 WEAPONS COLLECTOR 876 00:51:59,232 --> 00:52:00,234 [Dra. Ruth speaking Hebrew] 877 00:52:00,944 --> 00:52:02,948 I've already kissed your mezuzah. 878 00:52:03,115 --> 00:52:04,367 [in English] Welcome, welcome. 879 00:52:04,451 --> 00:52:05,954 [Dra. Ruth in Hebrew] Do you have dogs or not? 880 00:52:06,163 --> 00:52:07,206 [Shmil] I don't have dogs. 881 00:52:07,290 --> 00:52:08,710 [in English] No, okay. 882 00:52:12,008 --> 00:52:14,387 [in Hebrew] This is an Israeli paratrooper's beret. 883 00:52:14,471 --> 00:52:15,724 is a gift for you. 884 00:52:21,443 --> 00:52:23,444 [people scream] 885 00:52:25,201 --> 00:52:28,875 [young Ruth] The political situation in Palestine it is increasingly tense. 886 00:52:29,375 --> 00:52:32,800 Since the UN left the country in separate states, 887 00:52:32,883 --> 00:52:36,223 a guerrilla has awakened between Jews and Arabs. 888 00:52:38,603 --> 00:52:40,982 In Germany I saw firsthand 889 00:52:41,066 --> 00:52:44,155 what happens to the Jews when they don't have their own country. 890 00:52:44,657 --> 00:52:47,538 So I have completed my training as a Haganah sniper, 891 00:52:48,121 --> 00:52:49,959 the Jewish underground army. 892 00:52:52,421 --> 00:52:55,971 In practice, I hit the target almost every attempt. 893 00:52:56,973 --> 00:53:00,897 Last night I was on a roof with a machine gun 894 00:53:00,981 --> 00:53:04,530 watching Israeli soldiers who checked each car for weapons. 895 00:53:06,199 --> 00:53:09,999 My job as a sniper is to call if something happens. 896 00:53:10,332 --> 00:53:12,713 And shoot if necessary. 897 00:53:13,631 --> 00:53:16,052 Thank God I never had than shoot anyone. 898 00:53:20,019 --> 00:53:21,856 That makes me very sad. 899 00:53:22,231 --> 00:53:24,987 Who knows how many people this killed? 900 00:53:26,489 --> 00:53:27,659 It's enough. 901 00:53:33,086 --> 00:53:37,804 [Dra. Ruth] June 4, 1948, my 20th birthday. 902 00:53:40,184 --> 00:53:44,025 I was coming back from my shift as a sniper on the roof 903 00:53:44,860 --> 00:53:47,323 and when I got to this building, 904 00:53:47,866 --> 00:53:51,081 The alarm went off and I knew what it meant. 905 00:53:51,164 --> 00:53:53,293 It meant that there was to go to a shelter. 906 00:53:53,377 --> 00:53:55,966 - [an alarm rings] - [heavy breathing] 907 00:53:58,095 --> 00:53:59,347 [loud crack] 908 00:53:59,430 --> 00:54:01,059 [explosion] 909 00:54:01,602 --> 00:54:05,860 [Dra. Ruth] A cannonball hit and threw me 910 00:54:06,152 --> 00:54:07,781 against the wall, 911 00:54:08,950 --> 00:54:11,706 and killed some girls next to me. 912 00:54:13,208 --> 00:54:16,006 It was a very horrible scene 913 00:54:16,423 --> 00:54:20,389 screaming, blood everywhere, 914 00:54:20,598 --> 00:54:21,976 and then silence. 915 00:54:26,527 --> 00:54:29,700 A friend opened my shoes. 916 00:54:31,787 --> 00:54:34,000 And I looked down and saw a lot of blood. 917 00:54:35,545 --> 00:54:37,632 I asked him if I would die. 918 00:54:38,718 --> 00:54:42,016 Then they took me to the hospital of the city. 919 00:54:46,984 --> 00:54:51,326 The wounds on my little feet they were horrible. 920 00:54:51,660 --> 00:54:54,332 My foot had almost been blown off. 921 00:54:54,666 --> 00:54:58,423 The top was all twisted. 922 00:54:59,133 --> 00:55:02,056 I almost had both legs amputated. 923 00:55:03,099 --> 00:55:07,233 In the basement there were beds and beds with wounded soldiers. 924 00:55:08,151 --> 00:55:10,322 There wasn't even a hole for me. 925 00:55:10,990 --> 00:55:14,957 They put me on a book shelf because it was so small. 926 00:55:17,461 --> 00:55:20,300 I had a very handsome male nurse. 927 00:55:21,595 --> 00:55:24,475 And I made her believe that she couldn't feed myself. 928 00:55:25,310 --> 00:55:28,441 Lie. My hands they were perfectly fine, 929 00:55:28,943 --> 00:55:31,489 but that's how he fed me three times a day. 930 00:55:31,991 --> 00:55:35,790 And he fixed me so well that all my life 931 00:55:35,957 --> 00:55:37,209 I was able to water ski, 932 00:55:37,711 --> 00:55:39,463 skiing in the snow, 933 00:55:40,132 --> 00:55:41,552 ice skating, 934 00:55:42,177 --> 00:55:46,019 and I can still dance all night if I find a good partner. 935 00:55:48,566 --> 00:55:51,321 Ryan, I want you to show that I can walk fast. 936 00:56:00,840 --> 00:56:04,221 Well then you write something else in that book 937 00:56:04,305 --> 00:56:06,184 And that's when you should say goodbye 938 00:56:06,267 --> 00:56:10,610 Dr. Ruth, how do you know when to stay or go? 939 00:56:11,069 --> 00:56:15,620 Jonathan, I think inside your soul 940 00:56:15,870 --> 00:56:17,498 now you know. 941 00:56:17,582 --> 00:56:21,507 To the people who feel 942 00:56:21,674 --> 00:56:24,178 that is not in a good relationship, 943 00:56:24,261 --> 00:56:25,640 I suggest therapy. 944 00:56:25,723 --> 00:56:28,061 Do something to make it work. 945 00:56:28,144 --> 00:56:29,313 If not, 946 00:56:29,397 --> 00:56:33,488 at least separate, to start a new life. 947 00:56:33,572 --> 00:56:35,868 - [Jonathan] Mmh. - I speak from experience. 948 00:56:36,244 --> 00:56:38,582 I got married three times. 949 00:56:38,666 --> 00:56:42,882 But only my last marriage that lasted almost 40 years, 950 00:56:43,341 --> 00:56:46,222 with Fred Westheimer, it was the real marriage. 951 00:56:46,640 --> 00:56:48,351 I tell people 952 00:56:48,435 --> 00:56:52,359 "I do not speak only from the theory, I've really lived it. " 953 00:56:53,738 --> 00:56:57,286 The first husband it was David Bar-haim. 954 00:56:58,121 --> 00:57:02,087 He was an Israeli soldier. He was handsome. 955 00:57:02,171 --> 00:57:03,758 He was smart. 956 00:57:04,383 --> 00:57:06,137 he thought: "what luck", 957 00:57:06,220 --> 00:57:09,561 because I thought that no one she would marry me. 958 00:57:09,644 --> 00:57:12,149 I'm short, I thought she was ugly. 959 00:57:13,359 --> 00:57:18,119 she went to study medicine at the University of Paris, 960 00:57:19,330 --> 00:57:21,794 and I went to Paris with him. 961 00:57:23,421 --> 00:57:25,008 The Sorbonne had a rule. 962 00:57:25,425 --> 00:57:27,931 Those who did not have a high school diploma 963 00:57:28,014 --> 00:57:31,939 because of the war, they could do a preparatory year. 964 00:57:32,231 --> 00:57:35,947 And if they passed the exams, they could enter La Sorbonne. 965 00:57:37,074 --> 00:57:41,040 My father valued education more than anything, 966 00:57:41,667 --> 00:57:44,130 and I wanted to continue my studies. 967 00:57:45,006 --> 00:57:46,760 I entered La Sorbonne. 968 00:57:47,469 --> 00:57:52,730 I studied at the institute of psychology and I adored it. 969 00:57:53,356 --> 00:57:55,778 I remember the Salrecheuer 970 00:57:56,445 --> 00:58:00,955 where I heard classes from greats like Piaget, 971 00:58:01,497 --> 00:58:02,709 Nagash. 972 00:58:02,834 --> 00:58:04,461 I was very short, 973 00:58:05,046 --> 00:58:07,217 the auditorium was packed, 974 00:58:07,594 --> 00:58:11,810 and knew how to find a tall handsome guy 975 00:58:12,645 --> 00:58:16,027 put me on the windowsill near the teacher. 976 00:58:16,570 --> 00:58:18,239 He was listening very well. 977 00:58:18,323 --> 00:58:20,661 I took notes and passed the exams. 978 00:58:22,206 --> 00:58:23,416 While studying, 979 00:58:24,210 --> 00:58:27,926 it was clear that David he didn't want to continue studying medicine. 980 00:58:29,428 --> 00:58:33,102 He wanted to return to his life in Israel. 981 00:58:34,731 --> 00:58:37,904 He believed that marriage it would last forever, 982 00:58:38,906 --> 00:58:40,910 but I wanted to study. 983 00:58:41,703 --> 00:58:44,416 So he agreed to divorce. 984 00:58:47,715 --> 00:58:50,095 Then, in Paris, I met 985 00:58:50,513 --> 00:58:52,432 to husband number two. 986 00:58:52,517 --> 00:58:55,146 His name was Dan, he was beautiful. 987 00:58:55,815 --> 00:58:57,819 We had an affair. 988 00:58:57,902 --> 00:59:01,075 And then I got married. Not, 989 00:59:01,158 --> 00:59:02,745 I got pregnant first. 990 00:59:03,288 --> 00:59:06,837 Then I got married, because when you get pregnant, You get married. 991 00:59:09,049 --> 00:59:13,141 When Miriam was born I was delighted. 992 00:59:14,561 --> 00:59:17,650 Having grown up without a family, 993 00:59:18,151 --> 00:59:20,990 that beautiful little baby 994 00:59:21,490 --> 00:59:23,662 it was pure joy. 995 00:59:26,626 --> 00:59:30,133 All my life I had wanted hard 996 00:59:30,342 --> 00:59:35,268 go to the US, but I thought I would never I would have enough money. 997 00:59:36,605 --> 00:59:40,403 However, there was a check that gave automatically 998 00:59:40,696 --> 00:59:46,040 to all those who had not finished Holocaust studies. 999 00:59:46,666 --> 00:59:51,718 Suddenly I had $ 1500, and I said to Dan: 1000 00:59:52,637 --> 00:59:57,396 "We're going to the US". We went on a ship called Liberté. 1001 00:59:58,022 --> 01:00:01,112 In fourth class, at the bottom of everything. 1002 01:00:02,322 --> 01:00:07,249 They prevented us from going up, we were supposed to stay in our class. 1003 01:00:08,919 --> 01:00:14,263 I thought: "Wait, they won't tell me I can't go to first class. " 1004 01:00:15,516 --> 01:00:20,734 So we broke all the rules 1005 01:00:21,444 --> 01:00:24,534 and we stay there every night 1006 01:00:25,034 --> 01:00:30,546 so as not to lose sight of the Statue of Liberty. 1007 01:00:33,426 --> 01:00:36,140 I knew the poem by Emma Lazarus, 1008 01:00:36,766 --> 01:00:40,566 "Give me your tired masses, poor, piled up ". 1009 01:00:41,735 --> 01:00:45,534 And when I saw that miracle in heaven, 1010 01:00:46,160 --> 01:00:48,456 the symbol of Freedom for refugees, 1011 01:00:49,249 --> 01:00:52,380 I knew he was home. 1012 01:01:02,818 --> 01:01:04,363 I wanted to show you. 1013 01:01:05,490 --> 01:01:07,703 I vote, of course. 1014 01:01:08,204 --> 01:01:11,168 Since I am now a US citizen, I have always voted, 1015 01:01:12,212 --> 01:01:15,468 but I'm not talking about politics. 1016 01:01:16,262 --> 01:01:20,436 Someone who talks about sex as much as I do 1017 01:01:21,272 --> 01:01:22,942 It must be on the fringes of politics. 1018 01:01:23,569 --> 01:01:24,529 However... 1019 01:01:26,533 --> 01:01:29,371 Here's a cartoon of ... 1020 01:01:29,998 --> 01:01:34,716 of the most widely read newspaper in Israel. 1021 01:01:35,509 --> 01:01:40,811 I tell the presidents from North Korea and the US: 1022 01:01:41,605 --> 01:01:44,527 "Don't worry, size doesn't matter." 1023 01:01:46,740 --> 01:01:49,996 From the beginning, I never went to television 1024 01:01:50,079 --> 01:01:51,916 to talk about politics. 1025 01:01:52,500 --> 01:01:55,381 [reporter] Dr. Ruth, what do you think of Trump's sexual comments? 1026 01:01:55,465 --> 01:01:57,511 No, no comment. 1027 01:01:57,678 --> 01:01:59,891 [Leora] She doesn't talk about politics in public. 1028 01:02:00,475 --> 01:02:04,692 He has his ideas, I think it's not difficult know what they are. 1029 01:02:05,944 --> 01:02:10,453 But she doesn't want her patients 1030 01:02:10,537 --> 01:02:14,545 or her followers think they can't trust her for her political ideas. 1031 01:02:15,589 --> 01:02:17,133 [Joel] Of course it is in a different way of understanding 1032 01:02:17,217 --> 01:02:19,555 what is politics, right? 1033 01:02:20,014 --> 01:02:23,354 [Dra. Ruth] she called a woman, terribly upset because ... 1034 01:02:23,437 --> 01:02:26,318 ... you must have an abortion. 1035 01:02:26,820 --> 01:02:31,328 I certainly believe that abortion it must be kept legal. 1036 01:02:31,705 --> 01:02:33,249 I'm not talking about politics, 1037 01:02:33,667 --> 01:02:35,963 but I never got engaged 1038 01:02:36,046 --> 01:02:39,887 in many topics including abortion. 1039 01:02:40,054 --> 01:02:40,931 FAMILY PLANNING DECEIVES WOMEN 1040 01:02:41,014 --> 01:02:42,267 Even when it wasn't popular. 1041 01:02:42,727 --> 01:02:46,943 I am convinced that the law will fall at the end of this presidency 1042 01:02:47,235 --> 01:02:50,199 and the murder of children will return to hell where it came from. 1043 01:02:50,366 --> 01:02:53,205 I can't stop thinking if those who ask the right to choose 1044 01:02:54,124 --> 01:02:55,544 they stop to think 1045 01:02:56,295 --> 01:03:00,763 that the fetus, the unborn child, he never had that right. 1046 01:03:04,520 --> 01:03:09,029 It bothers me that the abortion problem has become a political football. 1047 01:03:09,112 --> 01:03:09,989 OXFORD UNION ABORTION DEBATE 1048 01:03:10,072 --> 01:03:15,249 I will be very upset if the abortion is outlawed again, because ... 1049 01:03:15,542 --> 01:03:20,928 Before legalization, only women with money they could get an abortion. 1050 01:03:21,303 --> 01:03:26,188 Going back to those years would be terrible, 1051 01:03:26,564 --> 01:03:31,240 because there would be miscarriages and hangers would be used again. 1052 01:03:31,908 --> 01:03:36,333 I think abortion it should continue to be available. 1053 01:03:36,416 --> 01:03:38,254 [applause] 1054 01:03:39,381 --> 01:03:43,138 [John] She is very diligent to avoid politicization. 1055 01:03:43,222 --> 01:03:44,182 JOHN LOLLOS VOICE TELEVISION PRODUCER OF DRA. RUTH 1056 01:03:44,266 --> 01:03:47,898 He just said: "I'm not a politician, I'm a sex therapist. 1057 01:03:48,567 --> 01:03:50,194 I'll stay there ". 1058 01:03:50,904 --> 01:03:52,533 Tell me what happens. 1059 01:03:53,910 --> 01:03:56,206 Well, since the abortion, I feel ... 1060 01:03:57,500 --> 01:03:58,628 i feel so depressed. 1061 01:04:00,966 --> 01:04:03,345 Now I think I was wrong. 1062 01:04:03,889 --> 01:04:06,018 [Dra. Ruth] Do you usually use contraceptives? 1063 01:04:06,101 --> 01:04:07,855 - [Laura] Oh yeah. - [Dra. Ruth] Well this 1064 01:04:08,272 --> 01:04:10,151 It was a contraceptive failure. 1065 01:04:10,234 --> 01:04:13,867 Do not blame yourself for not being responsible, Laura. 1066 01:04:14,952 --> 01:04:18,585 [Joel] she is political in the sense that she has a social and political impact 1067 01:04:18,668 --> 01:04:19,545 VOICE OF JOEL WESTHEIMER SON OF DOCTOR RUTH 1068 01:04:19,629 --> 01:04:21,966 ... tremendous in the world. 1069 01:04:22,383 --> 01:04:25,682 And he is able to reach people on a very human level 1070 01:04:26,141 --> 01:04:29,815 that transcends convictions political or religious 1071 01:04:29,899 --> 01:04:33,782 because he speaks to them as human beings. 1072 01:04:47,308 --> 01:04:50,524 [Dra. Ruth] When Dan and I we arrived in New York 1073 01:04:50,607 --> 01:04:51,567 WASHINGTON HEIGHTS, NEW YORK 1074 01:04:51,651 --> 01:04:53,947 ... we lived in an apartment here 1075 01:04:54,030 --> 01:04:58,497 on the third floor and ... 1076 01:04:58,581 --> 01:05:00,084 in a single room. 1077 01:05:01,587 --> 01:05:03,215 Shortly after we settled down, 1078 01:05:03,675 --> 01:05:07,975 I realized that Dan and I we couldn't be together. 1079 01:05:09,227 --> 01:05:10,564 I was very bored 1080 01:05:11,106 --> 01:05:13,695 because he was not an intellectual. 1081 01:05:14,446 --> 01:05:18,788 We had an old car. I gave him the car and I kept the girl. 1082 01:05:19,707 --> 01:05:22,588 she Suddenly she was a single mother 1083 01:05:22,671 --> 01:05:26,428 in a country with a language he did not know. 1084 01:05:27,639 --> 01:05:30,604 It was difficult raising Miriam alone. 1085 01:05:31,564 --> 01:05:35,071 She made $ 1 an hour working as a maid. 1086 01:05:35,697 --> 01:05:38,787 But she needed to learn English fast. 1087 01:05:39,162 --> 01:05:41,500 So she read romance novels, 1088 01:05:41,918 --> 01:05:45,634 because I always wanted to read them to the end to find out what happened. 1089 01:05:45,717 --> 01:05:46,886 [laughs] 1090 01:05:47,428 --> 01:05:52,188 I don't remember any other single mother in the fifties. 1091 01:05:52,606 --> 01:05:56,113 She was very poor, she really had no money, 1092 01:05:56,196 --> 01:05:59,787 but that didn't stop me from having fun. 1093 01:05:59,870 --> 01:06:03,586 She had parties every weekend. 1094 01:06:04,003 --> 01:06:06,299 Everyone bought food. 1095 01:06:06,551 --> 01:06:10,307 I only bought potato chips. 1096 01:06:12,980 --> 01:06:15,777 [Miriam] I remember myself as the only girl ... 1097 01:06:15,861 --> 01:06:16,863 VOICE OF MIRIAM WESTHEIMER DAUGHTER OF DR. RUTH 1098 01:06:16,946 --> 01:06:18,198 ... in a room full of adults 1099 01:06:18,282 --> 01:06:20,620 that they danced, they spoke and they had a good time. 1100 01:06:20,704 --> 01:06:22,749 Because he took me everywhere where she was going. 1101 01:06:24,587 --> 01:06:27,634 [Dra. Ruth] And when she got tired she put her on the bed 1102 01:06:28,343 --> 01:06:31,642 and surrounded her with sacks so that she wouldn't fall 1103 01:06:31,767 --> 01:06:33,938 and she slept in the middle of the noise. 1104 01:06:35,149 --> 01:06:39,992 Maybe I was a pioneer of single mothers. 1105 01:06:45,754 --> 01:06:47,423 Boy, this is serious. 1106 01:06:49,302 --> 01:06:50,847 [Michal] I think I was wrong. 1107 01:06:53,811 --> 01:06:54,813 GRANDCHILDREN OF DR. RUTH 1108 01:06:54,897 --> 01:06:58,613 [Dra. Ruth] I never let them win to their parents, never. 1109 01:07:00,199 --> 01:07:03,205 - [Leora] Why not? - Because they must learn to lose. 1110 01:07:04,541 --> 01:07:09,718 Prince and queen. Good move! 1111 01:07:10,845 --> 01:07:12,056 - Moment, moment, moment - [man speaks] 1112 01:07:12,265 --> 01:07:14,728 - [Leora] Bye. [laughs] - Oh God. 1113 01:07:18,736 --> 01:07:22,451 - It's terrible, they took me by assault. - Well, can we shake hands? 1114 01:07:22,661 --> 01:07:27,169 [Dra. Ruth] The hands. What grandchildren I have so ready. Bravo. 1115 01:07:32,471 --> 01:07:33,766 Look at this, 1116 01:07:34,685 --> 01:07:39,193 these are my grandchildren, all four of them ski. 1117 01:07:39,945 --> 01:07:44,621 I loved skiing and she was a very good skier. 1118 01:07:45,247 --> 01:07:48,211 Actually, that's how I met Fred. 1119 01:07:49,422 --> 01:07:51,886 One of my friends had a car, 1120 01:07:52,094 --> 01:07:55,518 so we collected money as a group 1121 01:07:55,935 --> 01:07:58,440 and we left my girl with friends, 1122 01:07:58,733 --> 01:08:01,488 and we would go skiing for the weekend. 1123 01:08:05,037 --> 01:08:06,081 MEINSTEIN ACCOMMODATION - SKIERS 1124 01:08:06,414 --> 01:08:09,212 He had a friend named Hans 1125 01:08:10,464 --> 01:08:13,470 and Hans and I climbed up the trailer 1126 01:08:13,638 --> 01:08:16,017 that takes you up the mountain. 1127 01:08:17,269 --> 01:08:21,904 But he was so tall that when he was behind it was on his ankle, 1128 01:08:22,321 --> 01:08:26,831 and when I was behind, it was on my neck, it was impossible. 1129 01:08:29,335 --> 01:08:31,423 In the mountain someone introduced me 1130 01:08:32,049 --> 01:08:36,307 to Manfred Westheimer, head of the Jewish ski club, 1131 01:08:36,391 --> 01:08:38,353 I was in the same accommodation. 1132 01:08:39,313 --> 01:08:42,486 I looked at that little man 1133 01:08:42,946 --> 01:08:47,288 and I said to Hans: "I'll go up the mountain with that little guy. " 1134 01:08:47,371 --> 01:08:49,793 Not as low as me but nobody is as short as me. 1135 01:08:50,210 --> 01:08:53,926 On the way up I knew he was 35 1136 01:08:54,051 --> 01:08:57,224 he had never married, he was an engineer, 1137 01:08:57,601 --> 01:09:03,028 and I liked it right away, and right there I decided that I would marry him. 1138 01:09:04,823 --> 01:09:10,000 I had to share a room with another woman in the group. 1139 01:09:10,083 --> 01:09:13,131 When i walked into the room at two O'clock in the morning, 1140 01:09:13,215 --> 01:09:16,262 because Fred and I had spent the night talking, 1141 01:09:16,304 --> 01:09:20,020 he told me: "Keep your hands off that guy, 1142 01:09:20,062 --> 01:09:21,189 is mine ". 1143 01:09:22,734 --> 01:09:25,823 I smiled and said, "We'll see." 1144 01:09:26,324 --> 01:09:28,203 Guess what, I married him. 1145 01:09:31,710 --> 01:09:32,796 [phone click] 1146 01:09:32,879 --> 01:09:34,382 Hello, you are on the air. 1147 01:09:35,050 --> 01:09:37,429 [George] Hello Dr. Ruth, my name is George. - Hello George. 1148 01:09:38,056 --> 01:09:41,187 [George] I'm dating a lady who has two children. 1149 01:09:41,354 --> 01:09:42,774 Yes, is she divorced? 1150 01:09:42,899 --> 01:09:44,193 - [George] Yes. - Well. 1151 01:09:44,277 --> 01:09:46,281 [George] And I love her very much. 1152 01:09:46,364 --> 01:09:47,324 Yes. 1153 01:09:47,408 --> 01:09:50,582 [George] And she has had two bad relationships. 1154 01:09:50,665 --> 01:09:51,584 AHA. 1155 01:09:51,959 --> 01:09:56,217 [George] And I wonder, in what class we could get into trouble 1156 01:09:56,301 --> 01:09:58,598 if we go ahead with this? 1157 01:09:58,681 --> 01:10:02,939 Yes, George, that she had two bad relationships 1158 01:10:03,023 --> 01:10:07,072 does not mean that the third it can't be fantastic. 1159 01:10:08,408 --> 01:10:13,043 So predict horrible things will happen 1160 01:10:13,418 --> 01:10:15,798 it's not going to be of much help. 1161 01:10:16,508 --> 01:10:18,428 And I heard you say George 1162 01:10:18,971 --> 01:10:21,184 i heard you say that you love her very much. 1163 01:10:21,309 --> 01:10:22,227 [George] Yes, I do. 1164 01:10:22,311 --> 01:10:25,818 Then I wouldn't worry about the past. 1165 01:10:26,444 --> 01:10:31,580 Take a sponge and clean. 1166 01:10:31,664 --> 01:10:33,542 [Diane] This is your third marriage, right? 1167 01:10:33,626 --> 01:10:36,507 - Yes, but now I'm married to him. - [Diane] It didn't go well the first time. 1168 01:10:36,590 --> 01:10:39,596 [Dra. Ruth] It's true, but I've been married for 23 years. 1169 01:10:39,680 --> 01:10:41,432 - Almost 24. - It's a long time. 1170 01:10:41,517 --> 01:10:44,146 - [Diane] Do you think it will last? - I think so. 1171 01:10:50,994 --> 01:10:54,751 [Dra. Ruth] My first two marriages They were legalized romances. 1172 01:10:55,712 --> 01:10:58,968 But with Freddie it was true love. 1173 01:11:00,847 --> 01:11:04,563 He adopted and adored my daughter Miriam. 1174 01:11:07,443 --> 01:11:10,575 And together we had our son Joel. 1175 01:11:14,624 --> 01:11:20,135 We needed a bigger house and that's why we moved to the site 1176 01:11:20,595 --> 01:11:23,266 where I have lived all these years. 1177 01:11:30,030 --> 01:11:34,998 Even after converting at Dr. Ruth, I'm glad to be here. 1178 01:11:35,958 --> 01:11:37,503 Because this is my home. 1179 01:11:41,135 --> 01:11:42,764 [the doorbell rings] 1180 01:11:44,643 --> 01:11:46,522 Excuse me a moment. 1181 01:11:48,651 --> 01:11:50,237 [surprised laugh] 1182 01:11:50,362 --> 01:11:53,076 - Did someone order a pizza? - Well, we have pizza. 1183 01:11:54,203 --> 01:11:56,917 - My Joel! - I'm sure you wanted pizza. 1184 01:11:57,000 --> 01:12:00,006 My Joel, my Joel is here. 1185 01:12:00,716 --> 01:12:02,302 They can go home. 1186 01:12:02,386 --> 01:12:03,722 [Joel laughs] 1187 01:12:04,056 --> 01:12:07,146 [Dra. Ruth] I want to show you something. I found an album. 1188 01:12:08,148 --> 01:12:12,574 Well I don't know who that is maybe a lover ... 1189 01:12:13,491 --> 01:12:15,913 - I don't remember. - [Joel laughs] 1190 01:12:16,707 --> 01:12:18,459 That's my Joel! 1191 01:12:18,919 --> 01:12:21,592 You were the cutest baby in the world. 1192 01:12:21,675 --> 01:12:24,556 And when will you get rid of that thing? 1193 01:12:25,056 --> 01:12:27,186 - Ring? - A hundred years ago, 1194 01:12:27,269 --> 01:12:31,737 Joel appears in Oscawana and I see a hoop. 1195 01:12:31,987 --> 01:12:34,074 I didn't speak to him for two and a half hours. 1196 01:12:34,158 --> 01:12:35,661 I think it was two days. 1197 01:12:37,916 --> 01:12:40,045 So now everyone will go and I will be very sad. 1198 01:12:40,128 --> 01:12:42,299 It was very sad when you four went. 1199 01:12:42,592 --> 01:12:45,222 [Joel] I know. It was so cute we were all here. 1200 01:12:45,305 --> 01:12:47,644 - But the apartment was so empty. - [Joel] Yes. 1201 01:12:47,727 --> 01:12:51,610 I'm not a grandmother in a rocking chair 1202 01:12:51,693 --> 01:12:53,906 waiting for her grandchildren to arrive, 1203 01:12:54,574 --> 01:13:00,252 but i don't like having them here and be alone suddenly. 1204 01:13:00,711 --> 01:13:02,757 No, she doesn't like being alone. 1205 01:13:02,882 --> 01:13:04,928 - [Dra. Ruth] No, I won't sit here alone. - You have learned that, right? 1206 01:13:05,888 --> 01:13:08,226 What I remember from when I was a child is that she was 1207 01:13:08,309 --> 01:13:09,980 a tornado of activity. 1208 01:13:10,480 --> 01:13:14,446 You got up on Saturday morning and there was already a plan. 1209 01:13:14,864 --> 01:13:16,284 - Certain. - I mean, we were going skiing 1210 01:13:16,367 --> 01:13:18,706 or over there, or to do that other. 1211 01:13:18,789 --> 01:13:20,793 There was always a kind of energy. 1212 01:13:20,876 --> 01:13:26,596 But, at the same time, always she was taking care of her career. 1213 01:13:27,097 --> 01:13:30,228 Or if. A mother at home she is probably 1214 01:13:30,312 --> 01:13:33,861 as opposed to our mother as possible. 1215 01:13:36,533 --> 01:13:39,789 [Dra. Ruth] I really believe that she would not have been a good mother 1216 01:13:40,206 --> 01:13:43,087 if she hadn't had 1217 01:13:43,171 --> 01:13:46,052 academic interests and a job. 1218 01:13:46,595 --> 01:13:50,101 I had a position in Family Planning from New York, 1219 01:13:50,686 --> 01:13:53,901 that in those years she was not as well known as now. 1220 01:13:54,903 --> 01:14:00,080 She worked in East Harlem, which at that time it was the worst. 1221 01:14:00,581 --> 01:14:04,421 [Joel] He traveled all day asking to be brought closer, 1222 01:14:04,506 --> 01:14:05,674 taking public transport. 1223 01:14:06,510 --> 01:14:09,682 I remember that he left many nights and my dad, 1224 01:14:09,766 --> 01:14:15,402 that for me always He was a stable engineer, 1225 01:14:15,861 --> 01:14:18,157 made dinner and stuff. 1226 01:14:18,534 --> 01:14:20,286 [Dra. Ruth] I trained paraprofessionals, 1227 01:14:20,704 --> 01:14:22,875 people without secondary degree, 1228 01:14:23,042 --> 01:14:26,925 as family planning counselors. And I loved him. 1229 01:14:27,885 --> 01:14:33,062 That increased my interest on the subject of family planning. 1230 01:14:34,816 --> 01:14:38,364 [Miriam] At home, he didn't talk to us much about sexuality. 1231 01:14:38,824 --> 01:14:42,289 He always wore some kind of equipment Birth Control Planning. 1232 01:14:42,540 --> 01:14:47,007 So in my little girls' school, when we had sex ed, 1233 01:14:47,090 --> 01:14:50,305 I was the only one who could take the team and say: 1234 01:14:50,388 --> 01:14:53,102 "This is an IUD, this is a condom." 1235 01:14:53,186 --> 01:14:56,568 I think I learned it from being there. 1236 01:14:57,402 --> 01:15:00,743 [Joel] I don't remember having it a big talk with me. 1237 01:15:01,285 --> 01:15:05,418 I left on purpose a lot of books with information, 1238 01:15:05,502 --> 01:15:07,130 and I would pick them up. 1239 01:15:09,092 --> 01:15:11,055 [Dra. Ruth] Since I was young, 1240 01:15:11,138 --> 01:15:14,436 the most important thing for me it was education. 1241 01:15:15,480 --> 01:15:17,025 That is why, in 1967, 1242 01:15:17,108 --> 01:15:21,952 I started my doctorate at Teachers College in Columbia. 1243 01:15:23,162 --> 01:15:27,588 For that job in Family Planning I used the data 1244 01:15:27,672 --> 01:15:29,842 out of 2000 women 1245 01:15:30,553 --> 01:15:35,270 and your contraceptive records and abortions when it was illegal 1246 01:15:35,353 --> 01:15:37,692 for my doctoral dissertation. 1247 01:15:38,694 --> 01:15:42,994 And I was 42 when I got my PhD. 1248 01:15:45,791 --> 01:15:48,964 While I was in Harlem, in Family Planning, 1249 01:15:49,214 --> 01:15:51,260 people were asking me questions. 1250 01:15:51,636 --> 01:15:53,890 Questions about premature ejaculation. 1251 01:15:54,474 --> 01:15:56,312 Inability to orgasm. 1252 01:15:57,230 --> 01:16:00,278 In all that area of ​​sexuality 1253 01:16:00,361 --> 01:16:02,742 I couldn't answer. 1254 01:16:03,869 --> 01:16:06,583 I discovered that I didn't know enough. 1255 01:16:07,125 --> 01:16:09,254 I needed more training. 1256 01:16:11,050 --> 01:16:15,768 At Cornell University there was a famous sex therapist, 1257 01:16:15,851 --> 01:16:17,772 Dr. Helen Singer Kaplan. 1258 01:16:18,481 --> 01:16:21,988 she was the first to develop a methodology 1259 01:16:22,322 --> 01:16:25,203 to treat sexual dysfunction. 1260 01:16:25,286 --> 01:16:29,587 Sex therapy is indeed a complex branch of psychiatry. 1261 01:16:30,088 --> 01:16:32,802 But the basic principle in a woman that she can't have orgasms 1262 01:16:32,885 --> 01:16:36,392 is to teach him to have an orgasm by itself. 1263 01:16:36,475 --> 01:16:40,024 [Dra. Ruth] I was accepted into the program by Dr. Helen Singer Kaplan 1264 01:16:40,108 --> 01:16:42,487 to learn sex therapy. 1265 01:16:43,114 --> 01:16:45,994 And I thought, "I'm in heaven." 1266 01:16:49,334 --> 01:16:50,713 According to Jewish tradition, 1267 01:16:51,130 --> 01:16:54,637 the word "know" in Hebrew is ladat, 1268 01:16:54,971 --> 01:16:56,306 meet someone. 1269 01:16:57,350 --> 01:17:00,941 It also means "sex," which is fantastic, 1270 01:17:01,943 --> 01:17:05,617 because the word "sex" means getting to know each other. 1271 01:17:05,826 --> 01:17:10,418 It means taking time to listen and to talk to the other. 1272 01:17:11,755 --> 01:17:15,470 By not having parents since the age of ten, 1273 01:17:15,888 --> 01:17:19,854 I was very aware of the importance 1274 01:17:19,937 --> 01:17:23,360 to be touched and loved. 1275 01:17:24,822 --> 01:17:29,498 It was for that reason that I became so interested 1276 01:17:29,582 --> 01:17:33,422 on family issues and relationships 1277 01:17:33,590 --> 01:17:36,386 and, over time, sexuality. 1278 01:17:38,600 --> 01:17:42,733 Working with Dr. Helen Singer Kaplan I learned the job. 1279 01:17:43,902 --> 01:17:47,535 We sat in a room with a mirror by which you could see 1280 01:17:47,952 --> 01:17:49,580 and we did sex therapy. 1281 01:17:52,126 --> 01:17:55,216 I worked with her at Cornell for seven years. 1282 01:17:57,680 --> 01:18:02,230 It was an absolute dream, work on professional help. 1283 01:18:03,232 --> 01:18:08,869 I had finished my studies and I had my private practice, 1284 01:18:09,077 --> 01:18:12,333 doing psychosexual therapy and relationship therapy. 1285 01:18:13,002 --> 01:18:15,298 Until 1981 ... 1286 01:18:15,381 --> 01:18:16,718 Very well! 1287 01:18:16,801 --> 01:18:18,470 Hello! How are you? 1288 01:18:18,555 --> 01:18:21,519 [Dra. Ruth] ... that was the year everything changed for me. 1289 01:18:21,603 --> 01:18:24,399 - You look wonderful, you haven't changed. - [Dra. Ruth] You look good. This is Betty Elam. 1290 01:18:24,482 --> 01:18:26,905 Without her, I wouldn't be Dr. Ruth. 1291 01:18:28,240 --> 01:18:31,956 she was still in the body from Cornell Medical Center 1292 01:18:32,040 --> 01:18:33,752 with Dr. Helen Singer Kaplan, 1293 01:18:34,169 --> 01:18:38,929 when a letter came to the program, to see if someone could speak 1294 01:18:39,012 --> 01:18:42,477 on the need for sex education. 1295 01:18:43,145 --> 01:18:47,362 Nobody wanted to go because they didn't pay money. 1296 01:18:47,613 --> 01:18:48,740 - They didn't pay. - Correct. 1297 01:18:48,823 --> 01:18:49,742 WYNY COMMUNITY AFFAIRS 1298 01:18:49,825 --> 01:18:51,621 - [Dra. Ruth] I saw the letter And I said, "I'll go." - Yes. 1299 01:18:51,704 --> 01:18:53,708 - [Dra. Ruth] "I'll blow up a balloon." - Correct. 1300 01:18:54,919 --> 01:18:55,921 CENTRAL WYNY OFFICES ROCKEFELLER PLAZA 30 1301 01:18:56,004 --> 01:18:57,508 [radio introduction] Ninety-seven 1302 01:18:58,092 --> 01:19:00,973 W, Y, N, Y. 1303 01:19:01,056 --> 01:19:03,185 [man] Let's look the weather of the weekend. 1304 01:19:03,310 --> 01:19:06,108 [Maurice] I remember Betty she came running to the station, 1305 01:19:06,233 --> 01:19:08,278 and said to the general manager: 1306 01:19:08,362 --> 01:19:09,615 "You won't believe this woman I met today ... 1307 01:19:09,699 --> 01:19:10,659 VOICE OF MAURICE TUNICK WYNY STATION MANAGER 1308 01:19:10,742 --> 01:19:12,495 ... is this size, 1309 01:19:12,579 --> 01:19:14,499 has a very strong German accent 1310 01:19:14,583 --> 01:19:18,257 and talk about sex like no one before. 1311 01:19:18,758 --> 01:19:20,929 I think we should do something with it. " 1312 01:19:21,764 --> 01:19:25,647 Frankly, it wasn't our priority, we were a music station. 1313 01:19:25,814 --> 01:19:30,448 But at that time the radios who received the license 1314 01:19:30,532 --> 01:19:35,416 should provide community services a certain number of hours. 1315 01:19:35,876 --> 01:19:38,840 And most radios assigned programs 1316 01:19:38,965 --> 01:19:40,969 when few people listened. 1317 01:19:41,721 --> 01:19:45,061 [Betty] It had never been done a program like that. 1318 01:19:45,144 --> 01:19:48,067 and I had many tug of war, but well. 1319 01:19:48,442 --> 01:19:53,160 If you are a woman in this business, you're used to it. 1320 01:19:53,536 --> 01:19:58,420 And Ruth can be very charming, besides that she has a good education. 1321 01:19:58,880 --> 01:20:04,683 So we were able to give it a try a Speaking of Sex. 1322 01:20:04,975 --> 01:20:07,063 [woman speaking] 1323 01:20:07,146 --> 01:20:08,148 FORMAT "TALKING ABOUT SEX" 1324 01:20:08,858 --> 01:20:10,904 [Maurice] The show was done in 30 rock. 1325 01:20:11,572 --> 01:20:13,868 She had never done radio before. 1326 01:20:13,952 --> 01:20:16,039 And the lawyers were very nervous about that, 1327 01:20:16,123 --> 01:20:18,837 very nervous about advice. 1328 01:20:19,504 --> 01:20:22,051 And the program would be recorded, to be able to edit 1329 01:20:22,135 --> 01:20:24,932 anything uncomfortable. 1330 01:20:25,725 --> 01:20:28,773 Good night, I am Dr. Ruth Westheimer. 1331 01:20:28,857 --> 01:20:31,737 Our program is called Let's talk about Sex. 1332 01:20:31,821 --> 01:20:32,739 IN THE AIR 1333 01:20:32,823 --> 01:20:34,492 Hello, are you still there? You're next. 1334 01:20:34,577 --> 01:20:35,579 VOICE OF SUSAN BROWN WYNY PRODUCER 1335 01:20:35,662 --> 01:20:38,793 We went to the study and we had 12 phone lines, 1336 01:20:39,545 --> 01:20:42,008 and answered. "Hello, Let's talk about sex, 1337 01:20:42,091 --> 01:20:43,302 do you have any questions? " 1338 01:20:43,845 --> 01:20:46,474 She wanted the element of surprise. 1339 01:20:46,976 --> 01:20:49,982 The first time she heard the question It was her when she pressed the button. 1340 01:20:50,065 --> 01:20:52,654 - Let's talk about Sex. You're on the air. - [John] Hello, Dr. Ruth. 1341 01:20:52,738 --> 01:20:54,909 - Yes. - [John] My name is John I'm from Georgia, 1342 01:20:54,992 --> 01:20:57,706 - and I have some kind of problem. - Let me hear it. 1343 01:20:58,207 --> 01:21:00,294 [Maurice] We recorded the show on Thursdays, 1344 01:21:00,377 --> 01:21:03,091 we went on the air on Sunday nights, 1345 01:21:03,175 --> 01:21:05,722 because there was nothing there. 1346 01:21:05,805 --> 01:21:06,974 12:00 - "LET'S TALK ABOUT SEX" WITH DR. RUTH WESTHEIMER 1347 01:21:07,058 --> 01:21:09,563 You know, who's awake Sunday at midnight? 1348 01:21:11,233 --> 01:21:15,199 It was a dead hour, perfect for a show 1349 01:21:15,282 --> 01:21:16,994 which makes you a little nervous. 1350 01:21:17,704 --> 01:21:23,215 I know a guy that only has erections 1351 01:21:23,675 --> 01:21:28,475 when your partner wears high heels. 1352 01:21:30,229 --> 01:21:35,907 [Maurice] In those days, on NBC you could sit in a study and consult 1353 01:21:35,991 --> 01:21:40,124 any other study to hear what they were doing. 1354 01:21:41,001 --> 01:21:42,796 We didn't do promotions, 1355 01:21:43,005 --> 01:21:45,134 but, apparently, by word of mouth, 1356 01:21:45,760 --> 01:21:50,937 and suddenly we knew that on Thursdays ... 1357 01:21:51,438 --> 01:21:53,651 [Dra. Ruth] Hello, you are in the air. 1358 01:21:54,027 --> 01:21:55,780 [Maurice] ... everything stopped at NBC 1359 01:21:55,864 --> 01:22:00,414 because people listened Ruth's recording for WYNY. 1360 01:22:00,582 --> 01:22:02,335 - [Jeff] Hello, Dr. Ruth. - [Dra. Ruth] Yes? 1361 01:22:02,418 --> 01:22:05,842 [Jeff] I heard a woman she only has so many orgasms 1362 01:22:05,925 --> 01:22:09,182 - in her life. - [Dra. Ruth] God forbid. [laughs] 1363 01:22:09,265 --> 01:22:13,775 It's a rumor that I hadn't heard, listen carefully, Jeff. 1364 01:22:13,858 --> 01:22:18,199 [Maurice] she was different from all trials morales back then in the United States. 1365 01:22:18,283 --> 01:22:21,540 There was no one you could talk to of that kind of thing. 1366 01:22:21,624 --> 01:22:25,130 And, suddenly, there was this woman on the radio, responding directly. 1367 01:22:25,214 --> 01:22:26,801 - You have to... - [Woman] If she knew she was pregnant 1368 01:22:26,884 --> 01:22:30,391 - I don't know what would have happened. - Good, but you need to talk to someone. 1369 01:22:30,892 --> 01:22:34,817 When people started calling couldn't tell Westheimer. 1370 01:22:35,192 --> 01:22:37,697 He is a long name and he is not American. 1371 01:22:38,073 --> 01:22:39,785 They called and said "Dr. Ruth." 1372 01:22:39,868 --> 01:22:40,787 WYNY STATION MANAGER 1373 01:22:40,870 --> 01:22:42,541 She said, "Okay, Dr. Ruth." 1374 01:22:42,624 --> 01:22:46,381 Now famous people from television and radio 1375 01:22:46,464 --> 01:22:47,425 [man] They are all a name. 1376 01:22:47,509 --> 01:22:49,387 [Dra. Ruth] Everyone uses first name. 1377 01:22:51,433 --> 01:22:54,565 But I tell you that I was the first. 1378 01:22:54,773 --> 01:22:56,652 We will return to the calls in just a moment. 1379 01:22:57,612 --> 01:22:59,783 [Betty Elam] Everyone was excited at the station. 1380 01:23:00,535 --> 01:23:04,375 I asked them if I could do it live. 1381 01:23:05,085 --> 01:23:06,337 And they said yes. 1382 01:23:06,463 --> 01:23:08,049 IN THE AIR. 1383 01:23:09,093 --> 01:23:12,642 [Maurice] We spent fifteen minutes one hour, then two hours. 1384 01:23:15,189 --> 01:23:18,863 [Dra. Ruth] Sunday nights the people coming back from the Hamptons 1385 01:23:19,280 --> 01:23:21,367 she got in the car at 10. 1386 01:23:21,702 --> 01:23:24,625 [man] he was lying on the bed reading a Playgirl 1387 01:23:24,708 --> 01:23:27,672 and I only had underwear on hand from my partner's girlfriend, 1388 01:23:28,423 --> 01:23:32,389 I was jerking off, and my housemate came in. 1389 01:23:35,980 --> 01:23:40,489 [woman] I have a vibrator, and I've reached the point 1390 01:23:40,573 --> 01:23:42,869 where do I prefer to use it than dating men. 1391 01:23:43,788 --> 01:23:44,790 [Dra. Ruth] Yes. 1392 01:23:44,873 --> 01:23:47,671 [man] My penis is extremely large, 1393 01:23:48,463 --> 01:23:50,384 - like 35 centimeters ... - [Dra. Ruth] Aha. 1394 01:23:50,467 --> 01:23:52,304 [man] ... and most of the girls I go out with 1395 01:23:52,388 --> 01:23:55,477 they seem intimidated with the size of my penis. 1396 01:23:58,985 --> 01:24:01,447 [Dra. Ruth] At 12 o'clock they were already back in New York. 1397 01:24:02,867 --> 01:24:06,499 Said that meant that you were already sexually aroused 1398 01:24:06,584 --> 01:24:07,836 By the time you got home 1399 01:24:14,181 --> 01:24:15,225 CONDUCTOR "GRANDMA FREUD" FAVORITE AMONG NEW YORKERS 1400 01:24:15,309 --> 01:24:18,398 [Maurice] Frankly, we didn't expect it to explode like this. 1401 01:24:18,941 --> 01:24:21,154 It started out as "a good idea". 1402 01:24:21,614 --> 01:24:25,078 But I think nobody thought that would make a difference 1403 01:24:25,162 --> 01:24:27,458 between success and failure from the radio station. 1404 01:24:28,084 --> 01:24:31,550 Turns out we were known for her. 1405 01:24:31,634 --> 01:24:33,929 We were Dr. Ruth's radio. 1406 01:24:34,138 --> 01:24:36,560 In a year, there were more people 1407 01:24:36,852 --> 01:24:39,315 listening to Ruth on Sunday night 1408 01:24:39,398 --> 01:24:44,534 than on the morning radios. Something unusual. 1409 01:24:44,618 --> 01:24:46,412 NBC HIRES DR. RUTH WESTHEIMER 1410 01:24:46,789 --> 01:24:48,375 Ruthless people IT IS THE WORST LOVER. 1411 01:24:48,458 --> 01:24:49,586 THE NEW PROGRAM OF DR. RUTH 1412 01:24:49,961 --> 01:24:53,511 [Joel] She wasn't really well known until I went to college. 1413 01:24:53,594 --> 01:24:58,019 In my freshman year, I remember it was Sunday and I went back to the bedroom ... 1414 01:24:58,269 --> 01:25:03,363 [Dra. Ruth] There are many women they would read Playboy for fun! 1415 01:25:03,531 --> 01:25:07,747 [Joel] And I heard my mother's voice in eight different radios, 1416 01:25:07,831 --> 01:25:12,172 scattered around the room, and I was surprised a lot, "Mom"? 1417 01:25:13,509 --> 01:25:16,765 IT'S 10 AM - DO YOU KNOW WHAT ARE YOUR CHILDREN LISTENING TO? 1418 01:25:17,391 --> 01:25:19,478 [Pierre] Suddenly received tons of media attention ... 1419 01:25:19,563 --> 01:25:20,523 A VOICE OF "SEXUAL LITERACY" 1420 01:25:20,606 --> 01:25:23,069 ... and a story from the New York Times a book contract emerged. 1421 01:25:23,153 --> 01:25:24,029 THE GOOD SEX OF DR. RUTH 1422 01:25:24,113 --> 01:25:26,535 And he started traveling and teaching. 1423 01:25:26,618 --> 01:25:29,833 Then came the evening shows. Letterman loved her, 1424 01:25:29,916 --> 01:25:31,920 Arsenio loved her, Carson loved her. 1425 01:25:32,004 --> 01:25:35,970 There are myths that everyone heard and they give laughter, about going blind ... 1426 01:25:36,220 --> 01:25:38,475 Or grow hair on your palms. 1427 01:25:38,559 --> 01:25:40,563 - Yes, those things. - You lose your hair. 1428 01:25:40,688 --> 01:25:42,567 - All that. - [audience laughs] 1429 01:25:46,199 --> 01:25:47,744 PEOPLE GOOD SEX WITH DR. RUTH! 1430 01:25:47,827 --> 01:25:49,205 [Pierre] Everyone loved her. 1431 01:25:49,288 --> 01:25:50,165 Next. 1432 01:25:50,248 --> 01:25:54,215 [Pierre] I used to go out in all class of programs , Quantum Leap, 1433 01:25:54,298 --> 01:25:57,931 The lives of the Rich and Famous, Hollywood Squares. 1434 01:25:58,014 --> 01:25:59,893 Then he started doing commercials, 1435 01:25:59,976 --> 01:26:02,314 made one with Pepsi, with Bo Jackson, 1436 01:26:02,397 --> 01:26:06,532 And one of Herbal Essence that attracted attention. 1437 01:26:06,615 --> 01:26:09,955 If you think that's good, try the shower gel! 1438 01:26:11,332 --> 01:26:13,211 [Pierre] she started an acting career . 1439 01:26:13,921 --> 01:26:15,633 That is a kiss? 1440 01:26:16,342 --> 01:26:18,137 [laughs] 1441 01:26:18,973 --> 01:26:21,979 [Pierre] she had a comedy , Dr. Ruth's house. 1442 01:26:22,062 --> 01:26:25,653 She was in a movie with Gerard Depardieu and Sigourney Weaver. 1443 01:26:25,778 --> 01:26:26,989 [both in French] 1444 01:26:27,155 --> 01:26:28,868 She even had her own board game. 1445 01:26:28,951 --> 01:26:30,453 DR. RUTH GOOD SEX GAME 1446 01:26:33,919 --> 01:26:37,175 [Maurice] He went from being a person more of New York 1447 01:26:37,259 --> 01:26:39,221 that goes everywhere by metro 1448 01:26:39,305 --> 01:26:42,520 someone they were taking 1449 01:26:42,604 --> 01:26:44,481 and they paid him to show up. 1450 01:26:44,858 --> 01:26:46,904 [Pierre] And then of course had its own programs. 1451 01:26:46,987 --> 01:26:48,031 GOOD SEX 1452 01:26:48,114 --> 01:26:49,116 THE SHOW OF DR. RUTH 1453 01:26:55,086 --> 01:26:58,802 After that, he couldn't walk anymore three meters without being stopped 1454 01:26:58,886 --> 01:27:00,138 to ask you questions. 1455 01:27:00,221 --> 01:27:02,727 I enjoy it, I always watch her program and all that. 1456 01:27:03,061 --> 01:27:04,271 [Pierre] she exploded. 1457 01:27:04,396 --> 01:27:07,402 [Susan] And he said we're not going to let the business change us. 1458 01:27:07,486 --> 01:27:09,406 Because one day she could leave and her line was: 1459 01:27:09,490 --> 01:27:11,118 "Poof, poof, this could all go away." 1460 01:27:11,912 --> 01:27:14,333 And today she is the same person. 1461 01:27:19,761 --> 01:27:24,019 Dr. Ruth, do you follow her advice with her husband at home? 1462 01:27:24,353 --> 01:27:28,529 I never let it come to the programs, 1463 01:27:28,904 --> 01:27:33,831 because she would say to you and Phil: "Don't listen to her, she's pure talk!" 1464 01:27:34,123 --> 01:27:36,127 - That is first. - [laughs] 1465 01:27:39,676 --> 01:27:42,180 [Diane] Is it true that what she says is it pure chatter? 1466 01:27:44,059 --> 01:27:46,105 - It's a good line. - [Diane laughs] 1467 01:27:46,188 --> 01:27:50,990 [Diane] Aren't you ashamed there are jokes about Dr. Ruth? 1468 01:27:51,115 --> 01:27:55,457 And imitations of Dr. Ruth on the Johnny Carson show? 1469 01:27:55,541 --> 01:27:59,924 Well imitation is the way most sincere of compliment, they say. 1470 01:28:00,341 --> 01:28:06,187 No, I'm not ashamed. Her she is very enterprising 1471 01:28:06,270 --> 01:28:11,113 and she is not frightened by any controversy, 1472 01:28:11,197 --> 01:28:15,205 whatever it is, and in this case it is sex. 1473 01:28:15,288 --> 01:28:17,125 If you can call it controversy. 1474 01:28:18,670 --> 01:28:22,469 [Dra. Ruth] This was the favorite bank by Fred Westheimer. 1475 01:28:24,473 --> 01:28:30,068 He loved this park with passion. He came almost every day. 1476 01:28:35,955 --> 01:28:37,959 One night in 1997, 1477 01:28:39,086 --> 01:28:42,927 I was coming back from a party from the Academy Awards. 1478 01:28:43,762 --> 01:28:47,770 And Fred said to me, "Ruth, I had a stroke." 1479 01:28:49,106 --> 01:28:51,193 So I called an ambulance, 1480 01:28:51,277 --> 01:28:56,162 and they took him to a hospital. He was in a coma for ten days. 1481 01:28:56,746 --> 01:28:59,168 He had a surgery, they did everything possible, 1482 01:28:59,459 --> 01:29:01,380 but they couldn't save him and he died. 1483 01:29:13,446 --> 01:29:19,124 I was very sad because I would have delighted to see his grandchildren grow up. 1484 01:29:22,422 --> 01:29:24,092 It was too early. 1485 01:29:28,476 --> 01:29:30,606 [Miriam] The only time I saw her cry 1486 01:29:30,940 --> 01:29:32,777 It was when my father died. 1487 01:29:32,944 --> 01:29:36,367 In his bed you know he took his last breath, and ... 1488 01:29:37,327 --> 01:29:38,664 And I saw her cry. 1489 01:29:38,747 --> 01:29:41,001 And I never saw her cry on another occasion. 1490 01:29:45,636 --> 01:29:48,391 After someone's death Jews keep Shivah. 1491 01:29:48,684 --> 01:29:52,525 It's a time of silence, and you stay home seven days 1492 01:29:52,942 --> 01:29:54,821 thinking of the person, 1493 01:29:54,904 --> 01:29:58,954 but she did it for a couple of days and then she went back to work. 1494 01:30:00,498 --> 01:30:04,089 [Joel] My mother had many tragedies in her life. 1495 01:30:04,172 --> 01:30:06,678 She went through the Holocaust, he lost his family, 1496 01:30:06,761 --> 01:30:08,097 he lost my father. 1497 01:30:09,642 --> 01:30:11,980 She is always committed with her work. 1498 01:30:12,565 --> 01:30:14,192 You know, she's almost ninety 1499 01:30:14,276 --> 01:30:15,904 and she's always busy. 1500 01:30:16,573 --> 01:30:19,077 I think she does a part of that 1501 01:30:19,161 --> 01:30:21,916 because she loves what she does, 1502 01:30:22,000 --> 01:30:23,628 but I think she too ... 1503 01:30:25,173 --> 01:30:26,801 it is her survival mechanism. 1504 01:30:28,137 --> 01:30:30,391 I think she felt conscious or unconsciously 1505 01:30:30,475 --> 01:30:32,312 that she had to choose between following 1506 01:30:32,813 --> 01:30:34,692 or be eaten. 1507 01:30:37,113 --> 01:30:39,994 [man] Are there parts of your past you don't want to talk about? 1508 01:30:41,038 --> 01:30:42,207 Of course. 1509 01:30:42,290 --> 01:30:45,088 There are certain things that one does not share. 1510 01:30:45,171 --> 01:30:48,344 Not even with a husband nor with her own children. 1511 01:30:48,804 --> 01:30:50,223 I give you an example, 1512 01:30:50,306 --> 01:30:54,272 my family was exterminated in concentration camps. 1513 01:30:55,400 --> 01:30:58,698 And there are certain aspects of, uh, 1514 01:30:58,782 --> 01:31:02,540 the pain and loneliness that I do not extend 1515 01:31:02,623 --> 01:31:05,420 because they are things that no one can avoid. 1516 01:31:06,130 --> 01:31:07,257 [man] Thank you. 1517 01:31:10,138 --> 01:31:12,977 [Joel] It's easy for you and me to say 1518 01:31:13,060 --> 01:31:14,939 that she blocks her feelings, 1519 01:31:15,022 --> 01:31:17,695 or that she should be explored in depth. 1520 01:31:18,320 --> 01:31:20,659 [Miriam] But that's the way she is. 1521 01:31:21,201 --> 01:31:22,538 she So she survived 1522 01:31:23,330 --> 01:31:26,796 and whatever works to live a life 1523 01:31:26,880 --> 01:31:30,846 as complete as yours ... 1524 01:31:32,432 --> 01:31:34,060 For me it's ok. 1525 01:31:37,484 --> 01:31:40,406 JUNE 4, 2018 1526 01:31:41,784 --> 01:31:44,372 90th BIRTHDAY OF DR. RUTH 1527 01:31:47,003 --> 01:31:48,047 [Dra. Ruth] More flowers? 1528 01:31:48,757 --> 01:31:51,094 Oh God, who sent me that? 1529 01:31:51,178 --> 01:31:52,640 It's lovely. 1530 01:31:52,723 --> 01:31:53,892 Very well. 1531 01:31:54,602 --> 01:31:56,689 Don't take it for granted 1532 01:31:57,357 --> 01:32:00,656 the New York Times the most important newspaper 1533 01:32:00,739 --> 01:32:03,662 In the USA. 1534 01:32:03,745 --> 01:32:06,709 On my birthday, on the front page, 1535 01:32:06,793 --> 01:32:10,509 not buried in an internal hole. 1536 01:32:10,592 --> 01:32:12,220 Look at this. 1537 01:32:12,596 --> 01:32:13,723 Oh. 1538 01:32:15,936 --> 01:32:18,900 "At 90, he still talks about sex 1539 01:32:18,984 --> 01:32:20,444 From morning to night". 1540 01:32:21,405 --> 01:32:24,452 Okay, come on, come on. 1541 01:32:26,666 --> 01:32:27,960 [laughs] 1542 01:32:36,101 --> 01:32:37,605 I remember 1543 01:32:38,022 --> 01:32:40,443 when she was nine and a half, 1544 01:32:40,527 --> 01:32:42,823 before leaving Frankfurt for Switzerland, 1545 01:32:43,658 --> 01:32:46,831 there was a book in my parents' library, 1546 01:32:46,914 --> 01:32:49,002 on the last shelf, 1547 01:32:50,004 --> 01:32:54,429 and when no one was home I was climbing to look for it. 1548 01:32:56,016 --> 01:32:58,437 It was called The Ideal Marriage. 1549 01:32:59,439 --> 01:33:03,698 And I saw that book with sexual positions 1550 01:33:03,782 --> 01:33:07,038 and I said: "This is what my parents do!" 1551 01:33:10,461 --> 01:33:12,090 So my parents, 1552 01:33:12,173 --> 01:33:16,264 even though they didn't have a chance to meet me later ... 1553 01:33:17,768 --> 01:33:21,441 They helped me to be who I am today. 1554 01:33:22,485 --> 01:33:24,072 - Thanks, Vincent. - No problem. 1555 01:33:24,155 --> 01:33:26,619 - [Dra. Ruth] Make sure that they give you to eat. - Well. 1556 01:33:27,955 --> 01:33:30,836 MUSEUM OF JEWISH HERITAGE 1557 01:33:36,012 --> 01:33:37,683 [Michal] They often ask 1558 01:33:37,766 --> 01:33:40,312 what is it like to be grandchildren by Dr. Ruth. 1559 01:33:40,814 --> 01:33:43,360 Well, it's having a grandmother which is very funny, 1560 01:33:43,444 --> 01:33:45,197 that she walks, skis, nothing ... 1561 01:33:45,281 --> 01:33:46,283 MICHAL LECKIE GRANDDAUGHTER OF DR. RUTH 1562 01:33:46,366 --> 01:33:47,870 ... and who gives them great advice to his grandchildren. 1563 01:33:47,953 --> 01:33:50,332 Happy ninety to our wonderful Omi. 1564 01:33:52,755 --> 01:33:55,134 Those who know Ruth well know 1565 01:33:55,217 --> 01:33:58,182 that she doesn't speak of her profession with her family. 1566 01:33:58,265 --> 01:33:59,225 GRANDSON OF DR. RUTH 1567 01:33:59,434 --> 01:34:01,104 There is an exception in fourth grade, 1568 01:34:01,188 --> 01:34:02,983 when she gave a full class sex education 1569 01:34:03,066 --> 01:34:05,279 to all my class from Riverdale Country School. 1570 01:34:05,362 --> 01:34:07,408 [laughs] 1571 01:34:08,160 --> 01:34:09,789 I still haven't recovered. 1572 01:34:14,130 --> 01:34:17,094 No kidding, happy nineties, Omi. 1573 01:34:17,554 --> 01:34:19,474 I feel very lucky to be your grandson, 1574 01:34:19,558 --> 01:34:20,811 and to think that millions of people 1575 01:34:20,894 --> 01:34:22,731 they are lucky to follow your advice. 1576 01:34:29,787 --> 01:34:32,626 Ruth became Dr. Ruth in the eighties... 1577 01:34:32,709 --> 01:34:33,628 FRIEND OF DR. RUTH 1578 01:34:33,711 --> 01:34:34,797 ... but thirty years later 1579 01:34:34,880 --> 01:34:36,174 she continues to educate us 1580 01:34:36,424 --> 01:34:38,680 and inspiring everyone. 1581 01:34:39,305 --> 01:34:41,309 Tonight we have a chance 1582 01:34:41,393 --> 01:34:43,815 to tell you how much impact 1583 01:34:43,898 --> 01:34:46,278 you and your life still have. 1584 01:34:46,946 --> 01:34:50,745 That you meet many more healthy years. 1585 01:34:57,634 --> 01:34:59,012 Grandchildren! 1586 01:34:59,805 --> 01:35:01,266 When I look back, 1587 01:35:01,349 --> 01:35:05,984 It was exactly 70 years ago, on my twentieth birthday 1588 01:35:06,067 --> 01:35:08,531 who wounded me in Jerusalem, 1589 01:35:08,615 --> 01:35:10,869 where I could have lose both legs. 1590 01:35:11,829 --> 01:35:14,543 And eighty years ago 1591 01:35:14,710 --> 01:35:16,964 I left Frankfurt am Main 1592 01:35:17,841 --> 01:35:19,803 because of the Nazis. 1593 01:35:20,931 --> 01:35:23,185 If I could talk to that girl now, 1594 01:35:23,728 --> 01:35:26,441 she would tell him: "Despite the fact 1595 01:35:26,943 --> 01:35:30,867 that you experienced some tragic events, 1596 01:35:32,746 --> 01:35:36,169 look what happened to you in life ". 1597 01:35:51,199 --> 01:35:53,663 Friends, did you eat anything? 1598 01:35:55,082 --> 01:35:56,459 Goodbye! 1599 01:35:57,629 --> 01:35:59,132 Hold my hand, please. 1600 01:36:03,432 --> 01:36:04,560 Very well. 1601 01:36:04,643 --> 01:36:06,605 - You ate? - [man] Yes. 1602 01:36:13,911 --> 01:36:15,707 [Dra. Ruth] For my past, 1603 01:36:15,790 --> 01:36:17,711 the things that I've overcome, 1604 01:36:18,420 --> 01:36:21,886 I have an obligation to live large 1605 01:36:21,969 --> 01:36:24,850 and leave a mark on the world. 1606 01:36:27,814 --> 01:36:29,150 - Well. - Well. 1607 01:36:59,753 --> 01:37:01,297 [Dra. Ruth] Oh I see a rainbow 1608 01:37:01,381 --> 01:37:02,926 Take the rainbow! 1609 01:37:03,009 --> 01:37:04,888 Rainbows bring good luck. 1610 01:37:06,432 --> 01:37:08,228 Look, I see cows. 1611 01:37:09,021 --> 01:37:11,442 One, two, a lot of them. 1612 01:37:12,696 --> 01:37:16,871 Fred Westheimer would have wanted to stop to talk to them. 1613 01:37:18,875 --> 01:37:20,294 Look at that snow. 1614 01:37:23,425 --> 01:37:25,095 [man laughs] 1615 01:37:26,264 --> 01:37:27,851 Snow in August! 1616 01:37:29,145 --> 01:37:30,940 There is an American term 1617 01:37:31,024 --> 01:37:33,821 that I don't use, but i will use now. 1618 01:37:34,363 --> 01:37:35,783 "Warming penises". 1619 01:37:36,201 --> 01:37:40,543 You never heard me use it, did you? 1620 01:37:41,754 --> 01:37:43,298 You have to discuss that. 1621 01:37:43,591 --> 01:37:46,387 Ryan, you must try this. 1622 01:37:46,680 --> 01:37:47,974 Something special. 1623 01:37:48,643 --> 01:37:52,567 Who else in the world has a friend 1624 01:37:52,943 --> 01:37:55,447 that he is a great lawyer? 1625 01:37:56,575 --> 01:37:58,495 Can I tell you how much you earn? 1626 01:37:58,579 --> 01:37:59,748 Not. 1627 01:37:59,831 --> 01:38:01,835 [Dra. Ruth] I know how much you earn per hour. 1628 01:38:02,002 --> 01:38:03,129 I will not say. 1629 01:38:06,344 --> 01:38:08,808 The last. Eat, Ryan. 1630 01:38:10,102 --> 01:38:12,314 - [Dra. Ruth] Do you hear me? - [Jacobson] Yes, you sound beautiful. 1631 01:38:12,398 --> 01:38:13,483 [Dra. Ruth] Well. 1632 01:38:13,567 --> 01:38:16,573 I just have to remember which is on all the time. 1633 01:38:19,245 --> 01:38:22,251 There is a lot of cow poop! Whoops! 1634 01:38:23,546 --> 01:38:26,510 I have two dollhouses In New York, 1635 01:38:26,593 --> 01:38:28,430 and i need one of those. 1636 01:38:29,850 --> 01:38:33,858 I love everything that is small and perfect like me. 1637 01:38:34,358 --> 01:38:35,360 [The door opens] 1638 01:38:35,444 --> 01:38:36,864 [Dra. Ruth] Hi, I'm here! 1639 01:38:37,114 --> 01:38:38,534 Where is the cameraman? 1640 01:38:38,617 --> 01:38:40,705 Look what I brought you! 1641 01:38:40,788 --> 01:38:42,542 Look what I stole for you. 1642 01:38:42,625 --> 01:38:44,211 Some sweets for everyone. 1643 01:38:44,295 --> 01:38:45,297 [Greg] Borrowed. 1644 01:38:45,380 --> 01:38:46,717 [Dra. Ruth] No, it's not a loan. You can eat it. 1645 01:38:46,800 --> 01:38:47,719 [laughter] 1646 01:38:50,558 --> 01:38:52,186 [Ryan] You said the last one. 1647 01:38:52,269 --> 01:38:53,480 Other? 1648 01:38:54,566 --> 01:38:57,154 [interviewer] Why still posting at 89? 1649 01:38:58,323 --> 01:39:00,035 What a stupid question! 1650 01:39:00,327 --> 01:39:01,454 Next question. 1651 01:39:02,414 --> 01:39:04,628 Although I speak from morning to night 1652 01:39:04,711 --> 01:39:06,673 actually I am a very reserved person. 1653 01:39:07,466 --> 01:39:10,973 You won't know how much money I have 1654 01:39:11,057 --> 01:39:13,478 And you won't know who I'm sleeping with either. 1655 01:39:13,562 --> 01:39:15,357 - That's all. Goodbye! - [laughs] 141482

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