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1
00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:10,259
Previously on Californication...
2
00:00:10,301 --> 00:00:12,219
- My name is Hank.
- I know.
3
00:00:13,471 --> 00:00:16,432
This is Mia, Bill's daughter.
And this is Hank.
4
00:00:16,474 --> 00:00:18,392
- She's 16.
- 16.
5
00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:21,437
Please do not make it like it
wasn't the least bit satisfying
6
00:00:21,479 --> 00:00:25,315
to fuck the wife of the man who turned
your precious book into a big, shitty movie!
7
00:00:26,401 --> 00:00:29,778
Get on with your life and forget about
the woman you didn't want to marry.
8
00:00:29,821 --> 00:00:31,572
I'm gonna marry Bill.
9
00:00:31,614 --> 00:00:32,781
- Hank.
- Are you sure?
10
00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:34,616
Quick, before I change
my fucking mind.
11
00:00:34,659 --> 00:00:35,784
Karen, wait!
12
00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:37,745
- I made a huge mistake.
- No.
13
00:00:37,787 --> 00:00:39,955
The DA's office was willing
to drop the assault charges.
14
00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:41,915
- That's the good news.
- What's the bad news?
15
00:00:41,958 --> 00:00:44,209
You're being charged with statutory rape.
16
00:00:44,252 --> 00:00:46,336
The prosecution has a lame case,
and they know it too.
17
00:00:46,379 --> 00:00:49,423
I don't want you to be guilty.
I don't want people to look at you that way.
18
00:00:49,466 --> 00:00:52,509
And then Monday will come,
and I'll take you to court
19
00:00:52,552 --> 00:00:57,014
so that you can stand trial for raping
a teenage girl.
20
00:00:57,057 --> 00:01:00,434
Cos that is the reality
of our lives right now.
21
00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:24,374
- You look great.
- I look like a fucking FBI agent.
22
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:27,544
A very brooding and comely FBI agent.
23
00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:28,962
But still...
24
00:01:29,005 --> 00:01:31,215
Just keep putting one foot
in front of the other
25
00:01:31,257 --> 00:01:33,675
and it will be over before you know it.
26
00:01:33,718 --> 00:01:36,512
That's exactly what I'm afraid of.
27
00:01:36,554 --> 00:01:39,181
What are you afraid of, exactly?
28
00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:43,477
Everything.
Which is weird, you know,
29
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:47,189
because I've spent my whole life practising
Zen and the art of who gives a fuck?
30
00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:51,235
And now I just want
to get in the Porsche and drive.
31
00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:53,529
Well, it's just as well, Becca totalled it.
32
00:01:53,571 --> 00:01:55,989
You know what I mean.
33
00:01:56,032 --> 00:01:57,741
I know what you mean.
34
00:01:58,743 --> 00:02:01,036
Can you tell me that
everything's gonna be all right?
35
00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:03,497
I can't tell you that.
36
00:02:03,581 --> 00:02:06,792
Can you tell me that you'll be here
when the smoke clears?
37
00:02:06,835 --> 00:02:09,920
I can't tell you that either.
38
00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:12,172
- What can you tell me?
- You're gonna be late.
39
00:02:12,215 --> 00:02:14,424
All right.
40
00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:16,051
- Come on.
- I just...
41
00:02:16,094 --> 00:02:19,054
I just need a few seconds.
42
00:02:19,097 --> 00:02:21,223
Gotta do... You know.
Gotta get the hair right.
43
00:02:21,266 --> 00:02:22,850
OK.
44
00:02:39,033 --> 00:02:40,534
Well...
45
00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:43,871
Looks like it's time
to get this party started.
46
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,207
After you, ladies.
47
00:03:41,304 --> 00:03:46,391
Free Hank! Free Hank!
48
00:03:51,689 --> 00:03:54,233
Oh, man.
I'm gonna take you around back.
49
00:03:54,317 --> 00:03:57,194
Yeah, thank you. I'm not feeling
particularly quippy this morning.
50
00:03:57,237 --> 00:04:00,864
- Well, there's a minor miracle.
- Well...
51
00:04:04,827 --> 00:04:07,913
OK, get the fuck out.
52
00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:11,875
- You're funny.
- You gotta laugh, right?
53
00:04:13,711 --> 00:04:15,837
I'm sorry, Karen.
54
00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:18,382
For hurting you, embarrassing you.
55
00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:20,050
For everything.
56
00:04:20,718 --> 00:04:23,345
You know what?
You know how you can make it up to me?
57
00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:26,848
Get in there, be a man,
deal with your shit,
58
00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:29,601
whatever happens.
59
00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:32,562
Or we could drive back
and head out to LAX,
60
00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:34,481
pick a destination off the board.
61
00:04:34,565 --> 00:04:37,985
Preferably some place warm and sunny
with a firm non-extradition policy.
62
00:04:38,027 --> 00:04:40,028
Go.
63
00:04:40,071 --> 00:04:42,906
Smile and be nice.
Mind your manners.
64
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:46,410
I'll see you inside.
65
00:04:46,452 --> 00:04:47,786
I love you.
66
00:05:04,595 --> 00:05:05,887
Sorry, man.
67
00:05:05,930 --> 00:05:09,933
- Oh, God.
- Shit. Wow.
68
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:12,519
- Long time no fucking see.
- Yeah.
69
00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:16,565
- How are you?
- I'm well, Hank. Thank you.
70
00:05:20,862 --> 00:05:23,196
Right.
71
00:05:23,239 --> 00:05:25,615
Look, how do I begin?
72
00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:27,409
How do I make you understand
how sorry I am?
73
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,077
Save your breath, Hank.
74
00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:31,747
You want to know what it's like
to walk in my shoes?
75
00:05:31,789 --> 00:05:34,041
I want you to think about Becca.
76
00:05:34,959 --> 00:05:39,129
What if I had sex with her?
How would that make you feel?
77
00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,548
What would you do
to make it OK again?
78
00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:45,093
Would you hit me?
Would you kill me?
79
00:05:45,136 --> 00:05:48,221
Or would you go in there,
tell them exactly what you know,
80
00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:51,308
and hope I get exactly what I deserve?
81
00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:55,145
See you inside.
82
00:05:56,147 --> 00:05:58,231
- There you are.
- Hey.
83
00:05:58,274 --> 00:06:00,400
I thought you made a run
for the border.
84
00:06:00,485 --> 00:06:04,112
I thought about it, then I hit Taco Bell
and the feeling passed.
85
00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:05,530
You ready to do this?
86
00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:31,765
You OK?
87
00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:35,310
- I think I'm gonna throw up... again.
- Again?
88
00:06:35,353 --> 00:06:38,313
Yeah. You think they have
any of those little barf bags around?
89
00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:39,773
OK.
90
00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:44,319
The State of California
versus Hank Moody.
91
00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:47,823
The Honourable Susan McMartin presiding.
All rise.
92
00:06:52,870 --> 00:06:55,080
Please be seated.
93
00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:59,751
The prosecution is absolutely right...
94
00:06:59,794 --> 00:07:02,504
about one thing,
and one thing only.
95
00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:07,384
Mr Moody had sexual intercourse
with a teenage girl.
96
00:07:07,427 --> 00:07:09,469
This is undisputed.
97
00:07:09,512 --> 00:07:10,971
On the night in question,
98
00:07:11,013 --> 00:07:13,932
Mr Moody was approached
by a very attractive young woman
99
00:07:13,975 --> 00:07:16,977
who made it very clear she was interested
in having sex with him.
100
00:07:17,019 --> 00:07:20,147
She went home with him that night
and did just that.
101
00:07:20,189 --> 00:07:22,941
At no point did Mr Moody
inquire about her age,
102
00:07:23,025 --> 00:07:26,361
nor did Ms Lewis offer it to him.
103
00:07:27,321 --> 00:07:30,782
Is this a good thing?
A smart thing?
104
00:07:30,825 --> 00:07:32,909
An honourable thing?
105
00:07:32,952 --> 00:07:34,202
Absolutely not.
106
00:07:34,245 --> 00:07:37,581
But it is a reality
of the world we live in.
107
00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:42,127
Mr Moody is far from a boy scout.
108
00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:44,254
He would be the first
to confess his sins.
109
00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:47,674
But he did not knowingly
have sex with a minor.
110
00:07:47,717 --> 00:07:50,469
He had sex with
a very troubled young woman,
111
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:53,805
who had reasons of her own
for obscuring the truth.
112
00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:04,399
I'd be lying if I didn't say
I was a little hard right now.
113
00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:06,234
You're good.
114
00:08:06,277 --> 00:08:09,070
Is the state ready to call
its first witness?
115
00:08:09,113 --> 00:08:12,115
If it please the court,
the state calls Charles W Runkle.
116
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:29,132
Hank Moody for a screening
of God Hates Us All.
117
00:08:29,175 --> 00:08:31,301
I don't have that on here.
118
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:36,932
I've got a screening for something called
A Crazy Little Thing Called Love.
119
00:08:36,974 --> 00:08:39,309
That it?
120
00:08:51,155 --> 00:08:53,573
London, Paris...
121
00:08:59,705 --> 00:09:01,581
Maybe forget about tomorrow.
122
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,960
Pretty tall order.
123
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:28,441
Hey, Moody, what'd you think?
124
00:09:28,484 --> 00:09:31,486
Oh, wait, I forgot...
I don't give a fuck.
125
00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:35,532
Now, now...
126
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:37,867
- That's it, Charlie, I'm doing it.
- What?
127
00:09:37,910 --> 00:09:40,370
I'm fucking his wife.
He's left me no choice.
128
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:43,248
- You don't want to do that, Hank.
- Yep, I think I do.
129
00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:46,710
Revenge is a dish
best served with my dick.
130
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:48,753
He actually said,
131
00:09:48,796 --> 00:09:52,340
"Revenge is a dish
best served with my dick"?
132
00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:58,013
Yeah, but he was just kidding around.
133
00:09:58,055 --> 00:10:01,141
He was just kidding around. So he didn't
really have an affair with Mrs Carr?
134
00:10:01,183 --> 00:10:04,227
Well, yes, he did.
But that was all in good fun.
135
00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:08,523
I see. So your definition of "good fun"
is breaking up a marriage?
136
00:10:08,566 --> 00:10:10,775
OK, now you're twisting
my words around.
137
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:28,001
- I think so too.
- I think it's gonna be very big.
138
00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:29,294
Women are gonna like it.
139
00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:33,089
- People seem to love...
- Women and transsexuals, maybe.
140
00:10:34,925 --> 00:10:37,052
You get lost, Moody,
or you still pouting?
141
00:10:37,094 --> 00:10:39,596
I'm sorry if I wanted it to be better, Carr.
142
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:42,265
A little more Fight Club,
and a little less You've Got Mail.
143
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:45,060
Christ on the cross, Moody,
what are you complaining about?
144
00:10:45,102 --> 00:10:47,937
- That thing is tracking through the roof.
- Trackin', schmackin'.
145
00:10:47,980 --> 00:10:50,732
It's a fucking abortion,
and you did the bloody honours.
146
00:10:50,775 --> 00:10:53,318
The worst thing is
you're not even a good abortionist.
147
00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:57,405
- You're a fucking hack with a wire hanger.
- You're such a fucking little girl.
148
00:10:57,448 --> 00:10:58,907
You want to see things
done your way,
149
00:10:58,949 --> 00:11:01,076
why don't you pick up
a fucking camera and direct?
150
00:11:01,118 --> 00:11:03,286
I don't want to direct.
You said you liked my book.
151
00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:07,290
- We shook hands. I trusted you.
- It's not that bad.
152
00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:09,459
Come on, what do you think?
Be honest.
153
00:11:10,961 --> 00:11:12,295
Can I speak freely?
154
00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:16,257
Sure. But be careful.
You're my fucking agent too.
155
00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:18,259
I thought it was amazing.
156
00:11:18,302 --> 00:11:22,722
- You silly twat.
- I thought it was wonderful, baby.
157
00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:24,933
Be nice and I'll let you write the sequel.
158
00:11:24,975 --> 00:11:28,520
Be nice and I won't fuck your wife again.
159
00:11:28,562 --> 00:11:31,022
What the fuck did you just say?
160
00:11:31,065 --> 00:11:34,275
Apologise, Hank. Right now.
161
00:11:34,318 --> 00:11:37,529
I'm just fucking with you, Carr.
You guys are obviously bulletproof.
162
00:11:37,571 --> 00:11:42,325
A love story for the ages.
A crazy little thing called love. Cheers.
163
00:11:42,993 --> 00:11:44,953
So when Karen moved in with Bill,
164
00:11:44,995 --> 00:11:48,164
did Mr Moody express
any similar desire for revenge?
165
00:11:51,001 --> 00:11:53,795
I'm gonna get that fucking bastard.
I'm gonna make him rue.
166
00:11:53,838 --> 00:11:55,630
- Rue what, exactly?
- I don't know.
167
00:11:55,673 --> 00:11:57,882
I just like saying "rue".
I find it most pleasing.
168
00:11:57,925 --> 00:11:59,259
Don't be stupid, Hank.
169
00:11:59,301 --> 00:12:01,636
- Too late.
- Yeah, that's what I was afraid of.
170
00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:04,556
Charlie, the man has stolen the love
of my life right out from under me.
171
00:12:04,598 --> 00:12:07,767
That dull fucking dial tone of a human
has poached my woman.
172
00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:10,979
You can understand that, right?
He has poached my favourite client.
173
00:12:11,021 --> 00:12:13,773
And now my daughter lives in prison
behind these castle walls.
174
00:12:13,816 --> 00:12:16,526
- What would you have me do?
- Go home and sleep it off.
175
00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:20,447
Aside from that. Do you have
my back on this, Charlie?
176
00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:24,200
- Just don't get us arrested, OK?
- Word to your mother, Charlie.
177
00:12:24,243 --> 00:12:26,578
Word to your fucking mother,
you bald motherfucker.
178
00:12:26,620 --> 00:12:29,289
If only someone would come along
and steal you out from under me.
179
00:12:29,331 --> 00:12:32,417
That ain't gonna happen. That will
never happen. I will never leave you.
180
00:12:32,460 --> 00:12:33,626
You know why? I'll tell you.
181
00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:36,880
Because I love you, and I will totally become
your blood brother right now.
182
00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:38,673
Do you have a knife?
A shard of something?
183
00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:40,675
- I'm good. I'm good.
- Use these car keys.
184
00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:42,719
- I'm good.
- Take the fucking wheel.
185
00:13:14,585 --> 00:13:18,338
What the fuck are you doing?
You took a shit on my car!
186
00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:20,381
- Come on.
- Fuck!
187
00:13:23,177 --> 00:13:25,970
- Don't...
- Come on and get me. Come on!
188
00:13:26,013 --> 00:13:27,597
Here we go!
189
00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:33,603
Go, Charlie, go!
190
00:13:36,273 --> 00:13:38,024
Nothing further.
191
00:13:43,447 --> 00:13:44,823
- Mr Runkle...
- Yeah.
192
00:13:44,865 --> 00:13:48,576
Would you describe Mr Moody
as more than just a client?
193
00:13:48,619 --> 00:13:53,039
Absolutely. I would describe him
as a friend. My best friend.
194
00:13:53,082 --> 00:13:56,084
And in what ways
has he acted as your friend?
195
00:13:57,461 --> 00:14:01,422
Well, there was a time
I was estranged from my wife...
196
00:14:01,465 --> 00:14:03,007
We're now divorced.
197
00:14:03,050 --> 00:14:07,804
She's having another man's baby.
They're living together now.
198
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:09,180
- Mr Runkle.
- Yes?
199
00:14:09,223 --> 00:14:12,225
- We don't need quite that much detail.
- I'm sorry.
200
00:14:12,268 --> 00:14:14,269
Anyway...
201
00:14:14,311 --> 00:14:18,481
Hank and I went out drinking one night,
and long story short, we met this woman.
202
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:22,652
She came back with us to Hank's place,
and I started putting the moves on her.
203
00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:25,280
But she really wasn't
that interested.
204
00:14:25,322 --> 00:14:27,407
Fact is, she wanted to sleep with Hank.
205
00:14:27,449 --> 00:14:29,784
But Hank wasn't that interested.
He wanted to go to bed.
206
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:31,286
You know, get some sleep.
207
00:14:31,328 --> 00:14:34,414
- But you know what he did?
- Mr Runkle, it's OK,
208
00:14:34,456 --> 00:14:37,417
- let me rephrase the question.
- No, no, no. You want to know what he did?
209
00:14:37,459 --> 00:14:39,502
He agreed to have
a threesome with us anyway.
210
00:14:39,545 --> 00:14:42,505
That's right, because that is
the kind of friend he is.
211
00:14:42,548 --> 00:14:44,507
And it turned into a total botch too
212
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:46,843
because the woman in question
was a squirter.
213
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:49,345
- A squirter!
- Mr Runkle!
214
00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:51,806
I'm sorry.
215
00:14:52,683 --> 00:14:55,476
A female ejaculator.
216
00:15:03,068 --> 00:15:08,489
- Nothing further, Your Honour.
- Mr Runkle, you're excused.
217
00:15:08,532 --> 00:15:11,659
If it please the court,
the state calls Karen van der Beek.
218
00:15:15,039 --> 00:15:19,250
In your opinion, how much
did Hank Moody hate Bill Lewis?
219
00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:21,085
Well, hate is a very strong word.
220
00:15:22,671 --> 00:15:24,047
I hate you, Bill.
221
00:15:24,089 --> 00:15:27,300
- That's lovely, Hank. Thank you.
- Karen? Karen!
222
00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:28,801
- Hey, hey.
- Karen!
223
00:15:28,844 --> 00:15:30,887
Can I have my family back now?
224
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:34,349
- Please? Pretty please?
- Go away, Hank.
225
00:15:34,391 --> 00:15:36,517
I feel I must warn you, Bill...
226
00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:39,479
I have a gun.
And I will use it.
227
00:15:39,521 --> 00:15:42,023
- OK.
- I will shoot you right between the eyes.
228
00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:46,486
And if that doesn't work,
I will kick you in the cunt.
229
00:15:46,528 --> 00:15:47,946
That's a water gun, Hank.
230
00:15:47,988 --> 00:15:49,989
Filled with hot sauce, motherfucker.
Banzai!
231
00:15:50,032 --> 00:15:53,534
Hank! Hank, what the fuck!
Will you grow up!
232
00:15:53,577 --> 00:15:55,244
Give that to... Stop.
233
00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:56,871
- What are you doing?
- Karen...
234
00:15:56,914 --> 00:15:59,374
Hi, Karen. You're so pretty.
235
00:16:00,501 --> 00:16:02,418
- Are you OK?
- Shall I linger?
236
00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:04,963
- No, no, I got it.
- This is getting old, Hank.
237
00:16:05,047 --> 00:16:07,674
No older than you are, Bill.
Booyah!
238
00:16:07,716 --> 00:16:10,343
- Shut up.
- Nailed it!
239
00:16:10,386 --> 00:16:12,845
- I'm sorry... Hank, go.
- OK, are you ready?
240
00:16:12,888 --> 00:16:14,973
- Are you ready to come home now?
- What?
241
00:16:15,015 --> 00:16:17,308
Are you ready to call an end
to this little flight of fancy?
242
00:16:17,351 --> 00:16:19,727
- Because guess what, I forgive you.
- Hank...
243
00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:22,689
- You're welcome.
- Shut up. It's over, OK?
244
00:16:22,731 --> 00:16:26,275
The fat lady has sung. She has left
the building. You've gotta get used to this.
245
00:16:26,318 --> 00:16:28,486
- Let me see Becca.
- No! You're drunk!
246
00:16:28,570 --> 00:16:31,572
She's seen me drunk before.
And I'm a happy drunk, anyway.
247
00:16:31,615 --> 00:16:33,783
- Get out. Go home.
- Don't use that word.
248
00:16:33,826 --> 00:16:37,245
You're not allowed to use that word.
It's not fair. I don't have a home.
249
00:16:37,287 --> 00:16:39,789
- OK, I'm not using it, OK? Go home.
- Give me my gun.
250
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:42,083
- Give me my gun. Can I have my gun?
- Yes. Yes.
251
00:16:44,628 --> 00:16:46,754
Your cross, Ms. Rhoads.
252
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,719
Let me get this straight.
You broke up with Mr Moody,
253
00:16:52,761 --> 00:16:54,887
moved in with Mr Lewis,
agreed to marry him,
254
00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:57,890
but left him on your wedding night
to move back in with Mr Moody.
255
00:16:57,933 --> 00:17:01,894
You then kicked Mr Moody out because
you thought he impregnated a friend,
256
00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:06,357
moved to New York for a job opportunity,
left your daughter in Mr Moody's care,
257
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:08,234
came back,
played house some more.
258
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:11,988
And then you broke it off yet again when
Mr Moody was accused of statutory rape.
259
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:14,907
Is that correct?
260
00:17:17,786 --> 00:17:20,788
You make me sound crazy
when you say it out loud like that.
261
00:17:20,831 --> 00:17:23,916
Your words, not mine.
Is that the sequence of events?
262
00:17:26,253 --> 00:17:27,795
Yes.
263
00:17:30,799 --> 00:17:32,467
Nothing further.
264
00:17:41,810 --> 00:17:46,272
I like this whole recess idea.
Takes me back to my formative years.
265
00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:49,275
How long do we get?
Do we have time for a game of kickball?
266
00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:53,696
Maybe she'll give him another chance.
267
00:17:53,739 --> 00:17:57,241
Shit. You didn't have to be
so hard on her up there, you know.
268
00:17:57,284 --> 00:18:01,412
- Do you want to go to jail?
- Is this another one of your trick questions?
269
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:06,000
Just let me do my job.
You just sit there and look pretty.
270
00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:08,461
I can do that.
271
00:18:10,005 --> 00:18:11,589
I think.
272
00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:15,635
How deep do these feelings run,
by the way?
273
00:18:15,677 --> 00:18:17,720
Huh?
274
00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:20,306
I just want to know
what I'm dealing with here.
275
00:18:20,349 --> 00:18:23,226
I can't believe I'm having
a relationship conversation
276
00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:25,812
with my lawyer
on the first day of my trial.
277
00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:29,482
I can't believe
I'm having a relationship conversation.
278
00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:31,859
- I know. You're such a girl, right?
- Shut up.
279
00:18:31,902 --> 00:18:33,861
I am serious,
I will cut your dick off.
280
00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:35,571
And...
281
00:18:35,614 --> 00:18:37,740
I'm hard.
282
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:39,367
Again.
283
00:18:39,409 --> 00:18:41,869
Et tu, Runkle-us?
284
00:18:41,912 --> 00:18:44,413
OK, you...
After all the stories we rehearsed,
285
00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:48,251
I missed the part where I said,
"Fuck it, let's go with female ejaculation!"
286
00:18:48,293 --> 00:18:52,213
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
He was twisting my words around.
287
00:18:52,256 --> 00:18:55,758
Did you see that?
I got really fucking nervous.
288
00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:59,137
Oh, it's OK, buddy boy.
It's all right.
289
00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:03,808
And for what it's worth, it was really fun
hearing that poop story again.
290
00:19:03,851 --> 00:19:05,810
I know. Right?
291
00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:13,276
If it please the court,
the state calls William Lewis.
292
00:19:21,118 --> 00:19:24,412
Here comes sweet dick Willie.
293
00:19:24,454 --> 00:19:28,416
Do you find him attractive, sexually?
294
00:19:44,641 --> 00:19:46,017
Mia!
295
00:19:46,059 --> 00:19:48,144
Daddy? Welcome home.
296
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,146
Get inside, now!
297
00:19:51,690 --> 00:19:53,900
What the fuck are you doing
in my house?
298
00:19:53,942 --> 00:19:56,903
I came to get my family...
299
00:19:56,945 --> 00:19:59,280
- then I passed out.
- You're pathetic.
300
00:20:02,117 --> 00:20:05,912
Good God, man.
Get yourself together!
301
00:20:06,955 --> 00:20:11,167
Get me a strainer.
I'll clean it up. I'll make it nice.
302
00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:15,671
- Just get the fuck outta here.
- I can do that.
303
00:20:17,132 --> 00:20:19,675
Just do me a solid, Bill.
304
00:20:19,718 --> 00:20:21,594
Don't tell 'em I was here.
305
00:20:21,637 --> 00:20:23,930
That would be my pleasure.
306
00:20:23,972 --> 00:20:26,515
I'm sorry I'm such a turd
in the punch bowl.
307
00:20:27,809 --> 00:20:29,769
I just really miss them.
308
00:20:29,811 --> 00:20:32,438
Yeah, I'm sure you do.
They're pretty fantastic.
309
00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:35,316
And as much as you blame me,
this is your doing.
310
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:38,986
I know that.
Why do you think I'm so fucked up?
311
00:20:42,491 --> 00:20:46,118
- Can you give me a hand?
- Yeah.
312
00:20:47,746 --> 00:20:50,331
You're a nice man, Bill.
313
00:20:50,374 --> 00:20:52,792
Oh, Jesus!
314
00:20:52,834 --> 00:20:54,835
- Are you OK?
- Yeah.
315
00:20:54,878 --> 00:20:57,129
- All right.
- You're handsome too.
316
00:20:57,172 --> 00:21:01,592
A real tall drink of water.
I see what Karen sees in you now. I get it.
317
00:21:01,635 --> 00:21:04,053
I bet you've got a nice dong too.
You must.
318
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:06,347
Karen has a thing for pretty dongs.
319
00:21:06,390 --> 00:21:08,766
- Let's go.
- Good for you, Bill.
320
00:21:10,018 --> 00:21:12,937
So let me see, when you arrived home
from your business trip,
321
00:21:13,021 --> 00:21:15,982
you found Hank and Mia having
some sort of poolside conversation.
322
00:21:16,024 --> 00:21:20,528
- That's correct.
- And when was that, exactly?
323
00:21:20,570 --> 00:21:22,738
July 12th, 2007.
324
00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:25,366
Which would mean you arrived home
325
00:21:25,409 --> 00:21:27,827
and saw Hank Moody
having a conversation
326
00:21:27,869 --> 00:21:31,163
with your daughter prior
to the night of August 13th?
327
00:21:31,206 --> 00:21:33,499
Yes.
328
00:21:34,584 --> 00:21:38,254
Quiet down, please. Quiet.
329
00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:44,176
Mr Lewis, do you believe that Hank Moody
set out to sleep with your daughter
330
00:21:44,219 --> 00:21:47,054
- as a way of getting back at you?
- I most certainly do.
331
00:21:47,097 --> 00:21:48,764
Yes.
332
00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:53,519
- Quiet.
- No further questions.
333
00:21:53,562 --> 00:21:56,063
Your witness.
334
00:21:56,106 --> 00:21:57,857
Mr Lewis...
335
00:21:57,899 --> 00:22:01,444
What condition was the defendant in when
you found him talking to your daughter?
336
00:22:01,486 --> 00:22:03,738
He was drunk.
337
00:22:03,780 --> 00:22:06,198
- How drunk?
- Blotto.
338
00:22:34,102 --> 00:22:36,270
Who the fuck are you?
339
00:22:36,313 --> 00:22:39,106
I live here.
Who the fuck are you?
340
00:22:39,149 --> 00:22:42,109
My family lives here.
I've come to rescue them.
341
00:22:43,445 --> 00:22:47,239
- How's that working out for you?
- Not as well as I'd planned.
342
00:22:47,282 --> 00:22:51,243
If they were really your family,
don't you think they'd be with you right now?
343
00:22:52,746 --> 00:22:55,623
It's complicated.
344
00:22:55,665 --> 00:22:57,458
You really love them, don't you?
345
00:22:57,501 --> 00:23:03,297
Yeah. So much so that the words
themselves sound unspeakably lame.
346
00:23:04,466 --> 00:23:06,509
God, that's hot.
347
00:23:08,095 --> 00:23:10,763
- Mia!
- Daddy? Welcome home.
348
00:23:10,806 --> 00:23:12,807
Get inside, now!
349
00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:17,561
Why didn't you think
to mention this before?
350
00:23:17,604 --> 00:23:20,606
Because I didn't think it mattered.
351
00:23:20,649 --> 00:23:24,902
I mean, he was so drunk.
He was in and out of sleep.
352
00:23:24,945 --> 00:23:29,448
The night that we met at the bookstore,
he had no idea who I was. None.
353
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:35,871
What was your relationship
with Karen like?
354
00:23:35,914 --> 00:23:39,500
It was fine. She was nice.
355
00:23:39,543 --> 00:23:41,669
I didn't ask if she was nice.
356
00:23:41,711 --> 00:23:43,712
I asked what your relationship was like
357
00:23:43,755 --> 00:23:46,632
when you were forced to live together
under the same roof.
358
00:23:51,638 --> 00:23:55,307
Hey, Mia!
Where are you going dressed like that?
359
00:23:55,350 --> 00:23:57,852
- Out.
- Out where?
360
00:23:57,894 --> 00:24:02,106
- Just out. Who cares?
- I care. Who with?
361
00:24:02,149 --> 00:24:06,652
- Some guy.
- Some guy? What, some guy from school?
362
00:24:06,695 --> 00:24:10,990
- No, he's older.
- He's older? OK, how much older?
363
00:24:11,032 --> 00:24:15,870
- Significantly.
- Mia, come on. Your dad's out of town.
364
00:24:15,912 --> 00:24:18,831
He is not gonna want you
tramping around with some older guy.
365
00:24:18,874 --> 00:24:22,042
My dad's always out of town. I don't think
he cares about my whereabouts.
366
00:24:22,085 --> 00:24:24,462
Mia, come on.
367
00:24:24,504 --> 00:24:27,882
Hey, Becca and I,
we're gonna watch a movie.
368
00:24:27,924 --> 00:24:31,051
Manhattan. I just...
You want to join us?
369
00:24:31,094 --> 00:24:33,679
I don't want to see a movie.
I want to go out.
370
00:24:33,722 --> 00:24:37,016
But, you know, maybe you shouldn't.
Maybe there's trouble out there.
371
00:24:37,058 --> 00:24:39,351
- You know what I mean?
- Well, what's so wrong with that?
372
00:24:39,394 --> 00:24:41,353
Don't you ever want to go out
and get into trouble?
373
00:24:41,396 --> 00:24:42,813
Sure, when I was your age.
374
00:24:42,856 --> 00:24:44,607
But you know what,
I wish once in a while
375
00:24:44,649 --> 00:24:47,526
someone had asked me to stay in
and watch a movie instead. Come on.
376
00:24:47,569 --> 00:24:51,822
- You know you want to.
- No, I'm gonna go.
377
00:24:51,865 --> 00:24:55,659
Mia, you know what, at this point
I'm not really asking you, I'm telling you.
378
00:24:55,702 --> 00:24:57,745
- Oh, you're telling me.
- Yeah.
379
00:24:57,787 --> 00:25:01,248
- What are you gonna do about it?
- Don't test me.
380
00:25:01,291 --> 00:25:02,875
Fuck you.
381
00:25:06,630 --> 00:25:08,881
She was just being sweet.
382
00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:12,218
But that just made me more mad,
you know.
383
00:25:12,260 --> 00:25:14,220
My mother was dead,
384
00:25:14,262 --> 00:25:18,474
and my father decided to bury his grief
in a new girlfriend.
385
00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:23,395
I just wanted to go out
and get into trouble.
386
00:25:23,438 --> 00:25:26,941
At the same time,
I wanted her to stop me. I...
387
00:25:26,983 --> 00:25:29,401
It felt good,
someone caring enough to say no,
388
00:25:29,444 --> 00:25:33,239
but I just told her "Fuck off"
and I stormed out.
389
00:25:33,281 --> 00:25:36,450
That guy was a jerk.
I left him at some bar on Abbot Kinney,
390
00:25:36,493 --> 00:25:42,748
and I started walking home thinking
I'd catch whatever was left of Manhattan.
391
00:25:42,791 --> 00:25:47,753
But then I wandered
into the bookstore...
392
00:25:47,796 --> 00:25:51,799
and I found the trouble
that I was looking for.
393
00:25:54,803 --> 00:25:56,720
Nothing further.
394
00:26:06,106 --> 00:26:07,773
That was horrible.
395
00:26:07,816 --> 00:26:10,901
It was like watching
This Is Your Life in 3-D,
396
00:26:10,944 --> 00:26:14,029
on acid, with my creepy uncle's dick
on my shoulder.
397
00:26:14,072 --> 00:26:15,906
- What the fuck, Hank?
- What the fuck what?
398
00:26:15,949 --> 00:26:18,617
- What the fuck?
- That jury is now under the assumption
399
00:26:18,660 --> 00:26:21,161
that you knew Mia before
you actually slept together.
400
00:26:21,246 --> 00:26:23,122
- But...
- The seed of doubt has been planted.
401
00:26:23,164 --> 00:26:26,250
That's all it takes.
Do you...
402
00:26:26,293 --> 00:26:28,877
This changes everything.
403
00:26:37,137 --> 00:26:38,887
Some day, huh?
404
00:26:38,972 --> 00:26:42,141
- So you knew who she was all along?
- No, not you too, Karen.
405
00:26:42,183 --> 00:26:44,101
No, I have no memory of that. None.
406
00:26:44,144 --> 00:26:47,146
- Amnesia. Convenient.
- You don't understand,
407
00:26:47,188 --> 00:26:50,149
- those days were all a blur to me.
- I do understand. Yeah.
408
00:26:50,191 --> 00:26:53,611
You can't remember.
I will never forget!
409
00:26:53,653 --> 00:26:56,905
It's that asshole's job
to make me look like an asshole.
410
00:26:56,948 --> 00:26:59,575
Yeah, well, you know what,
he didn't have to work too hard.
411
00:26:59,618 --> 00:27:01,619
The only thing I'm guilty of
is poor judgment.
412
00:27:01,661 --> 00:27:04,246
Yeah, me too! Fuck you!
33451
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