All language subtitles for Mean.Mums.S01E08_English

[upbeat music]

[indistinct yelling]

- Konnichiwa Shepherds and
Shepherdesses.

It's the last day of school,

so please collect all lost
property.

Ensure all precious art
is carefully taken home.

And, until our school fire
fundraising is complete,

the school pool is for display
only.

- Alright.

How do you feel on your
last day of Year One?

- You're so embarrassing.

- Hey I'm your mum; it's my
unpaid job to embarrass you.

I love you my sweet little baby!

[uplifting music]

So, I talked to the people
that wanted to hire the hall.

- You're not doing that thing
where you fake being sad

but you really have good news?

- Well not anymore.

We got the money.

- Excuse me?

- We got the money.

- I hired the hall out as a
movie location

for ten thousand dollars.
Which brings our total to?

- Seventy-five thousand
dollars, fifty cents.

And a packet of raisins.

Which means, our kids can swim
in a pool

with real water next year.

Instead of swim miming in ash.

- And it means that parents
will stop running away

from me because they think I'm
trying

to sell them raffle tickets.

It's over.

- We are the greatest
fundraising mums in the world.

- Yes.

- The school is gonna
be like, so grateful.

- Yes.

Do we have to do the
hand holding thing again?

I don't wanna--
- Just once.

Go, come on Heather.

[upbeat music]

[bell rings]

- Hello, we'd like to
see the Principal please.

- Whom may I say is calling?

- Jess. Jess from the Junior
Fundraising Committee.

We've raised seventy-five
thousand dollars

and fifty cents and a packet of
raisins.

- Why are you not impressed?

It was really hard.

- Well wasn't that the amount
you were asked to raise?

- Yes.

- Plus an extra fifty cents.

- The senior fundraisers?

Yeah, they raised seventy-six
thousand last term.

- Well, the deadline was this
afternoon

and I think you'll find that Mr.
Coxhead

will want to thank us
effusively in person.

- Aha.

[bell ringing]

- Sorry.

- There's no need to thank us.

- Okay. Great.

I thought you were
nowhere near your target?

- Last minute quiz night wine
sales exceeded expectation.

- And I hired the hall
out as a movie location

over the holidays.

It's about a vampire who
learns to break dance.

- But not this December?

- Yes for this December.

- Holiday Programme need the
hall.

The classroom they normally
use was destroyed in the fire,

which may or may not
have originated there.

I'm sorry, kids come first.

You'll have to cancel and keep
trying.

- Can't they just use another
room?

- If you can find somewhere for
them,

you can hire out the hall.

- Challenge accepted.

- Are you ladies joining us
for assembly this afternoon?

- Yes, we can do the chairs.

[uplifting music]

- Hey, Mia G.

- Hi.

- So what are you gonna do
for the school holidays?

- Not go to school?

- Same.

- You're lucky I practise
gratitude

or I'd be really annoyed with
you.

- You didn't think to check the
dates

before you booked out the hall?

- The senior fundraisers said it
was free.

- They think they're so funny.

- Just cause their kids
can do joiny-upy writing.

It can't be over, we have
till 3 to find a home

for Holiday Programme, hire the
hall and swim in the praise.

And the pool.

Keep setting up for assembly.

I got this.

- Everyone knows Holiday
Programme started the school
fire.

- Come on, can't you help us
out?

Remember what High School
Musical says?

- Stick to the Status Quo?

- No, we're all in this
together.

- Sorry, I'm running a 'Reading
is way cooler than YouTube'

programme in the library
over the holidays.

Try the teachers.

- Absolutely not.

- Oh, come on.

Remember what High School
Musical says?

- Get'cha head in the game?

- Look, the money we'll raise
will help

a lot of kids at this school.

You know Holiday Programme
started the school fire, right?

- Well, that was an
unsubstantiated rumour.

- Don't bother asking any
of the other teachers.

We spend hours of our own time,
and money,

setting up our classrooms.

No one is gonna let those
little fire-starters in.

- Phil!

- Sorry, I think I hear
my students calling.

- I still have options.

- Good luck with those.

[laughing]

- So that's a yes for tents on
the field?

- Nah.

I actually run an
underprivileged
girls soccer clinic here,

it's called "Everybody wants
balls".

- Feminism thanks you for your
service.

- Oh, no worries.

- And you are?

- Here to ask if we can use your
office

over the school holidays.

- Sorry, I use it for a
mentoring programme for teen
mums

who want to get into
office administration.

- That's really noble.

- We failed.

Holiday Programme get the hall,

we don't get ten grand
and the junior playground

will never get the bark
it so desperately needs.

- All is not lost. Despite
my better judgement

I posted a request on
the school Facebook page

asking for a corporate sponsor.

- Do you ladies need help with
anything?

- No, thank you.

- Anyway as I was saying

before that annoying dad
interrupted.

- I can still hear you.

- Finally, a working mum has
offered to help us real mums.

- All mums are real mums.

- And technically we're all
working.

- Well, I identify as a real
mum.

- Agree to disagree.

- No.

Anyway.

[uplifting music]

- I'm Molly's mum.

- Oh, I loved Molly in the
school play.

I really believed she was
getting kidnapped by the Moon.

- Our company's keen to
do some community outreach

to offset some bad
publicity we had recently.

- What happened?

- It's not important, what is
important

is that we have money to burn
and I've a burning desire

to help the school, since it got
burnt.

- Ah, looks like working
mums are people too.

- We'll see.

- I'm afraid I can only manage
10K?

Is that enough?

- Yes.
- Yes.

- Easy. I'll transfer
the cash this afternoon.

- The school can finally finish

the mural about perseverance.

- You are gonna love our
vitality drink for kids.

- Your what now?

- It has all natural colours
with locally sourced caffeine,

organic taurine and only
twelve tablespoons of pure,

fair trade sugar.

[upbeat music]

- If our new energy drink
sponsors Holiday Programme

we can stage some
hilarious non-staged videos

with the kids for our viral
campaign.

- Then would we say that
kids need energy drinks?

- Brax needs less energy.

- We need ten thousand dollars.

- It's called Boom and
it has yet to be proven

to cause spleen issues.

- Yikes.
- Let the woman speak.

I assure you it's perfectly
safe,

as long as it's not consumed
with, oh!

- With what?
- Sorry, I'm gonna take this.

- With what?

With what?

Look, I know that the
school needs computers

with a G key but we can't
take dirty energy drink money.

Can we?

- But it'll get us to
our fundraising goal,

maybe some like, hand
drawn thank you card.

- What do you think, Hine?

- Nah.

- 'Cause the school and
parents won't approve?

- Yeah.

- But people will think we've
failed

just because we didn't succeed.

- We've raised over
sixty-five thousand dollars,

that's more than enough to fix
the pool

and finish the outline
on the netball court.

- We've still got a few hours.

Maybe we could auction off lost
property?

I think Jaden's Mum's
already cleared it out.

- Kia ora junior fundraisers.

- It's us, the senior
fundraisers.

- I heard you didn't make the
75k?

- Yeah, no thanks to you.

Why did you tell me the hall was
free?

- Because my kid is leaving
and I don't care anymore.

- Then why are you here?

- The senior parents are
throwing us

a thank you morning tea

and we'll undoubtedly be given
flowers

so we're looking for vessels
to keep our thanks fresh.

- The parents are throwing you a
party?

- And you're not invited,
it's for seniors only.

Aren't the grateful junior
parents throwing you a party?

Oh that's right, they've got
nothing to be grateful for.

The junior mums have decided

to focus their energy on
more important things.

- Actually, we landed a
corporate sponsor

so we will be reaching our goal.

- Whatever.

Anyway we're off to get flowers

mostly made up of green filler

and the second cheapest bottle
of bubbles they can find.

Ka kite.

- I thought you were against
kids promoting energy drinks?

- I've got a plan.

- You haven't steered us wrong
yet.

- History would argue otherwise.

- Sorry, just a minor
disagreement

as to whether "mood altering"

should be classified as
a side effect or a bonus.

- How would you feel about doing

your viral videos with
mums instead of kids?

- Nice.

- Not bad.

Sleep-deprived mums might see
the appeal of an energy drink.

- Yeah, and we would be happy to
do it,

you know to help the school.

- Yeah. Not to reach some silly
goal

and just rub some mums faces in
it.

- What she said.

- Oh, you are very average
looking.

Pretty but not pretty
enough to be intimidating.

And you all look exhausted.

Let's film a little
audition tape for the boys

down at head office. I'll
get some shirts and some Boom

and, yeah, some more flattering
light.

[upbeat music]

- Um, oh, just quick question:

I thought that the drinks name
was Boom?

- It is, but due to copyright
issues

we're using the German spelling.

The umlaut lengthens the U to an
oo sound.

The kids'll get it.

- Oh, yeah, they do love
German pronunciation.

- And you're not worried that
people

might think that it says
something else?

- That was my concern.

- Nope. Not everyone reads their
food.

Right, let's open those cans.

Okay. We'll do anything to help
the school

get scooter racks that
actually fit scooters.

- Is it supposed to crackle like
that?

- It's fun, right?

- Mm, reka.

- Oh, I probably should
have checked but none of you

have had citrus in the
past 24 hours, have you?

- Yes.

- Oh, you should be fine.

Right, here we go.

[upbeat rock music]

- Oh, I'm starting to feel that
organic taurine kicking in.

My hair is vibrating.

- I can't. Not at all. Not
one little bit. Not yet.

- Um, why don't you tell us
a bit about yourselves first?

- Kia ora, we're the
hard-working mums

of the Junior Fundraising
Committee.

- Yeah we are! Whoa!

- Is my voice echoing?

And we need a lot of energy
to help raise kids and funds,

that we thought we'd
thought we'd already raised

but just seem to keep on going.

And it's not important
that no one appreciates

our hard work.

This is starting to make
me feel a little angry,

is that normal?

- Cut.

Sorry, someone's singing,

"For they are jolly good
fundraisers."

- It's those damn senior parents

thanking those smug mother
Fundraisers.

- I hope they're allergic
to their flowers.

- I hope their bottle of wine
is to be shared between them.

- Yeah, we've been working
our butts off all year,

and nobody's noticed!

- And for what!

So we can stand around wearing
bum shirts?

- This school sucks butt.

The parents don't care.
The staff don't care.

And don't get me started on the
dads.

- Oh yeah, totally!

Man, this stuff is strong. I
like it.

- Yeah.

- That is perfect.

- Oh, wait, what?

- That'll really resonate
with our target market,

since most mums feel
under-appreciated.

- Oh, no, no, no, no, no!

- Jess!

- Hey!

Molly's mum!

You can't use that.

- But it's exactly the
embarrassing viral confession

that'll really get Boom noticed.

- But we were just venting.

- Yeah, and what happens at Kate
Sheppard

stays at Kate Sheppard.

- We were kinda saying some
bad things about the school?

- Yeah, and the staff and the
parents.

Yeah, and it might sound a
teensy bit

like we don't practise
gratitude.

- You've already signed the
release forms,

this is going on YouTube ASAP.

I'm sorry ladies but this video

is both embarrassing and
lucrative.

- I could take her.

Jess, do you want me to take
her?

- Okay, okay, mum to mum,
please delete that video.

- Don't pretend I'm in your
little gang.

I'm a full time working mum.

Work think I'm lazy for
leaving early on Fridays

and school mums, like you,
think I'm a bad parent

because I missed my daughter's
play.

- I can't win.

- That's not true. Wait. Wait!

Molly was the lead, right?

- Oh, Cinnamon was the crucial
role of Moon Zombie Three.

- Braxton was a Pukeko Pirate.

I missed it because I
was receiving an award

for working mothers.

- Well I didn't. In fact,
I filmed the whole thing.

If you delete your video,
I will give you mine.

Come on. Remember what
High School Musical says?

- No, I never saw it.

- High School Musical reminds
us we're all in this together.

- Yeah.

- Okay, while mums like us
hold down the fort at school,

mumma's like you make sure

we've still got a voice in the
real world.

Babes, we're all on the same
team.

- Yeah, boy.

- Fine. I'll delete it.

The lads at the office

would probably want to
change it to dads anyway.

- Dads are such thunder
stealers.

- Thank you.

- Thank you.

You know I can't give you the
money now?

Yeah I know.

- And I'll need those shirts
back.

Now. I'll need them back now.
Off you go.

[upbeat music]

- And that's why the
solution is less pollution.

[audience clapping]

- Thank you for that excellent
rap about global warming.

Now it is time for junior
certificates.

So, from Room 1: Cinnamon
Maloney

for excellent persuasive
speaking.

[audience cheering]

Braxton Hicks, for keeping
his hands to himself.

[audience cheering]

And from Room 2: Ryan Nutt
for outstanding artwork.

- Yes, Ryan! Woo!

[audience cheering]

- Now before I let these
children go,

I have three more certificates
I have to give out.

These ones are for
effort and perseverance.

Could these children's Mums
please come to the stage.

These ladies' are the Junior
Fundraising Committee.

They have raised over $65,000
this year

and on behalf of the school,
I would like to thank them.

[audience cheering]

Woo!

[uplifting piano music]

Ah, I've just been
informed that Sara's dad

has donated $10,000 to
these ladies' efforts,

which means that our fire damage
rebuild

can start over the holidays.

Woo!

[audience cheering]

- [Audience] Sara's Dad!

Sara's Dad!

Sara's Dad!

Sara's Dad!

Sara's Dad!

- Did that dad just
totally steal our thunder?

- Yes.

We don't need thunder.

Sara's dad!

Sara's dad!

- Oh, that was a bit nice.

- They didn't have to do that.

- Mine's going straight on my
fridge.

- Ladies, just came to
help you with the chairs.

- While our classes watch
a Ted Talk on independence.

- You know what I learned today?

- To check whether the hall is
booked

before you hire it out?

- No. That we're not the only
people

who work extra hard for this
school.

Thank you.

- It's just a chair.

- Phil?

- Yes?
- We really appreciate you.

- I think I hear my students
calling me.

[uplifting music]

- Hello Margot, I would just
like

to say thank you for
all your help this year.

- Oh, no problem, Jess.

- And, thank you for the
certificates.

- Well you ladies really
made a difference.

- Oh.

- And you know what High
School Musical says?

- We're all in this together.

- See you next year.

- Yeah.

- Oh.

Are you okay?

Is he okay?

[upbeat music]

- I think Molly's Mum
was a little bit jealous

of our Junior Fundraising
Committee.

- She called us a gang.

- Yeah, we are.

- Mean.

[upbeat guitar music]

♪ Can you come around

♪ Keep me company

♪ Share our time just a little
bit longer, baby you and me ♪

♪ Can I hear your words

♪ That you say so gracefully

♪ Find a play drenched in sun

♪ That we can make believe

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

♪ Fearing of us wasting time

♪ But you and I

♪ We will fly

♪ Take my hand and hear my side
♪

♪ Covering our voices in each
little send with replies ♪

♪ Wondering when next
I'll see those eyes ♪

♪ Like rivers

♪ [upbeat music]