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♪ Crash and Bern ♪
2
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Can you smell it, Bernstein?
3
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-Can you smell it?
-[inhaling]
4
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Is that you?
5
00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:10,681
I'm talking about manhood.
6
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No grocery cart has ever attempted
this speed before.
7
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Hey, Wyatt, are you sure this is safe?
8
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As a matter of fact,
I am 100% sure that it is not.
9
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Otherwise, I would be laying there.
10
00:00:27,068 --> 00:00:29,948
Hey, hey, hey! What's going on here?
11
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We're gonna be the first men
to successfully jump a kid
12
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with a shopping cart.
13
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Hey! You don't pound nails
with ladies' footwear.
14
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Don't you have any real tools?
15
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I live with girls.
16
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When my mom needs to fix something,
she calls a guy... Or you.
17
00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:50,339
You boys are hopeless.
18
00:00:50,425 --> 00:00:52,085
Someone needs to teach you how to be men.
19
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-I'll do it.
-What are you? A speed bump?
20
00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:55,137
Get up from there!
21
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Let's do this!
22
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Gentlemen, start my engine.
23
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Whoo!
24
00:01:06,191 --> 00:01:08,571
Whoa!
25
00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:10,571
Ahh! Ugh!
26
00:01:12,697 --> 00:01:15,447
[grunts and spits]
27
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We did it!
28
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My building!
29
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[muffled screams]
30
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♪ Let me tell you about the Bernsteins ♪
31
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♪ Yo, I'ma let you finish ♪
32
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-♪ But ding-dong ♪
-♪ Who's that? ♪
33
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♪ Yo, it's Crash at the door ♪
34
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♪ Don't wait for you to openKick it down hard core ♪
35
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♪ A purple with a 'tudeWhere your mom hide the food? ♪
36
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-♪ In the fridge ♪
-♪ I'ma eat it then we tear it up, dude
37
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♪ No make-up or feelingsTea parties or dolls ♪
38
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♪ Now it's ninjas and football ♪
39
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-♪ And face slams ♪
-♪ Good call ♪
40
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♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
41
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♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
42
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♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
43
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♪ What he said ♪
44
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♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
45
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♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
46
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♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
47
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♪ What he said ♪
48
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♪ It's war against awesomeBut awesome's gotta soar ♪
49
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-♪ I'll be grounded forever ♪
-♪ That's what friends are for ♪
50
00:02:03,748 --> 00:02:05,998
♪ Crash and BernsteinCrash and Bernstein ♪
51
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-♪ Crash and Bern... ♪
-♪ I said "Stein" ♪
52
00:02:07,836 --> 00:02:09,416
♪ What he said ♪
53
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[chuckles]
54
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[boys] Whoa.
55
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Is this your man cave?
56
00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:21,931
No, it's the boiler room.
57
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Where you boil things for the man cave?
58
00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:28,521
This could be an epic man cave.
59
00:02:28,606 --> 00:02:31,276
All it needs is a giant TV
and a toaster oven.
60
00:02:31,359 --> 00:02:33,529
And a fireman pole--
61
00:02:33,611 --> 00:02:36,201
Oh! And a fireman butler
62
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who knows karate and makes sandwiches.
63
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I don't have any of that.
64
00:02:43,371 --> 00:02:46,621
I got power tools
and a big can of grease.
65
00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:49,420
[boys] Wow!
66
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I'm a hard man to impress,
67
00:02:52,130 --> 00:02:54,260
but you have done it, sir.
68
00:02:55,133 --> 00:03:00,563
Now, the first rule of learning
how to become a man is this.
69
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Listen to the man.
70
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Thanks for the introduction, Mr. Poulos.
71
00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:07,189
I'll take it from here.
72
00:03:07,896 --> 00:03:10,936
What? You're about as manly
as a bowl of sherbet...
73
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The pink kind.
74
00:03:13,276 --> 00:03:15,816
Now, boys, this is a hammer.
75
00:03:15,904 --> 00:03:18,284
You'll notice it doesn't have a heel
76
00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:20,405
or come with a matching handbag.
77
00:03:20,492 --> 00:03:23,952
Um, will this be on the man test?
78
00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:26,207
Write it down. I'm copying off of you.
79
00:03:27,165 --> 00:03:29,785
Here. I want you to drill
some holes in that beam.
80
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-You think you can handle it?
-I guess.
81
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Good job.
82
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Strong, even pressure.
83
00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:42,427
That's how a man uses a tool.
84
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-It's a lot like mixing cupcake batter.
-[groans]
85
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Me next! Me next! Me next!
86
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Cool it, grape-ade.
87
00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:52,018
A real man doesn't say, "Me next."
88
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A real man says,
"Let me give it a crack."
89
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-Let me give it a crack.
-Now you're getting it.
90
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[Crash groans] Whoa!
91
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Whoa! Oh!
92
00:04:05,578 --> 00:04:07,208
Uh!
93
00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:11,961
Hey! Look at me. I'm a tool!
94
00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:14,384
[Crash laughs]
95
00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:20,469
Part of being a man
is repairing the stuff you break.
96
00:04:20,552 --> 00:04:22,142
Does that include hearts?
97
00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:25,772
Yes, it does,
but that's a different lecture.
98
00:04:25,849 --> 00:04:28,559
I call it, "It's not you, it's me."
99
00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:33,614
Now, gentlemen,
I give you the jackhammer.
100
00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:36,480
Whoa, this is awkward.
101
00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:38,488
I didn't get you anything.
102
00:04:39,571 --> 00:04:42,741
Old jack can be
an unforgiving piece of machinery.
103
00:04:42,824 --> 00:04:46,124
You let him get the better of you,
he'll shake you like a baby's rattle!
104
00:04:46,202 --> 00:04:49,332
You have to be absolutely sure
before you ever turn him on--
105
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[jackhammer turns on]
106
00:04:55,337 --> 00:04:56,707
Hey, what's going on?
107
00:05:00,675 --> 00:05:02,835
You ruined my other wall!
108
00:05:04,512 --> 00:05:07,642
[stuttering] It wasn't m-m-me!
109
00:05:10,185 --> 00:05:11,685
Crash, what are you doing?
110
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Must-- bite-- sandwich!
111
00:05:15,607 --> 00:05:17,397
Ah-ah.
112
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:20,150
Why are you shaking?
113
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[stuttering] Why are you shaking?
114
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Never mind. I just came to get a drink.
115
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[stuttering] Here. T-take mine.
116
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[stuttering] I'll open it.
117
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♪ Let me hear you say Crash ♪
118
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♪ Crash, Crash, Crash ♪
119
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Roland, I should have volunteered
for manhood training years ago.
120
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So far, the boys have changed
all the rat traps,
121
00:05:46,054 --> 00:05:48,644
scrubbed out the dumpsters,
and prepared this cheese plate.
122
00:05:49,265 --> 00:05:51,805
I don't suppose you put
hand washing on that list?
123
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No, why?
124
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,146
Ugh.
125
00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:58,784
You don't feel guilty making
these boys do all your work?
126
00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:00,688
That's how boys become men.
127
00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:03,857
Once I turned four,
my father never got out of his recliner.
128
00:06:03,947 --> 00:06:06,567
I knew how to fix a toilet
before I knew how to use one.
129
00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:10,662
Your stories are always so sad.
130
00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:14,874
Besides, I need these kids' help
131
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if I'm gonna finish all my work
before our trip to the cabin.
132
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Tell me about it.
133
00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:21,510
I can't go until I trim
my grandma's toenails.
134
00:06:21,589 --> 00:06:22,759
Or else she won't let you go?
135
00:06:22,841 --> 00:06:24,631
Or else she'll rip up my couch.
136
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[Crash] Cannonball! Uh!
137
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[Crash muffled] Look at me! I'm a statue.
138
00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:37,440
-I'll go hose him down.
-Don't bother.
139
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Plaster dries fast.
Then I'll just smack him with a mallet.
140
00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:43,447
-Is that the easy way?
-Don't know,
141
00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:44,988
but it's the fun way.
142
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I can't wait for our camping trip.
143
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Three whole days living free.
144
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Free like a bush.
145
00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:55,924
You're going camping?
146
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Yeah, a bunch of us are.
147
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It's our annual men's weekend.
148
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We call it, "Woods without Women."
149
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Sign us up.
150
00:07:02,922 --> 00:07:04,672
No can do. It's for men only.
151
00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:05,628
We're men...
152
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,349
Or at least men in training.
153
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,808
What better way to learn
than by watching the experts?
154
00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:14,849
Well, we are pretty much
the prototypes for manhood.
155
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:17,896
True. True.
156
00:07:17,979 --> 00:07:20,859
But I don't want to be up there
babysitting kids.
157
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:23,110
Come on. We're very responsible.
158
00:07:23,193 --> 00:07:25,653
Who's that? You and the statue?
159
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Hold still.
160
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[Crash muffled] Is it gonna tickle?
161
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I hope not.
162
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It did! Again! Again!
163
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You take the joy out of everything.
164
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[laughs]
165
00:07:44,673 --> 00:07:48,013
Ah, I love the smell of the sea.
166
00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:50,053
That's not the sea. It's the sewer.
167
00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:53,806
Well, whatever it is,
I hope to retire there some day.
168
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:56,484
[screams and struggles]
169
00:07:56,559 --> 00:07:59,309
-It's the big one, Bernstein!
-Let her run! Let her run!
170
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I'm out of line!
171
00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:02,073
-Then pull!
-[struggles]
172
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:05,938
[Cash gasping]
173
00:08:06,027 --> 00:08:07,697
How'd that get in the toilet?
174
00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:10,119
I flushed it when I stepped in dog doo.
175
00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:13,284
I thought shuffling on your mom's carpet
would've cleaned it,
176
00:08:13,368 --> 00:08:15,908
but there was a lot of doo.
177
00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:21,500
Why are you guys doing Mr. Poulos' work?
178
00:08:21,584 --> 00:08:23,004
He's teaching us how to be men.
179
00:08:23,086 --> 00:08:25,876
[scoffs] Well, you got
the clueless part down.
180
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We're on a mission here.
181
00:08:27,799 --> 00:08:28,969
We have to prove to Mr. Poulos
182
00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:31,180
that we're man enough
to go on his camping trip.
183
00:08:31,261 --> 00:08:33,011
All we have left is to vacuum the lobby
184
00:08:33,138 --> 00:08:34,888
and take care of Roland's
grandma's toenails.
185
00:08:34,973 --> 00:08:36,103
I call toenails!
186
00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:38,812
Ha-ha. Sucker.
187
00:08:38,893 --> 00:08:40,353
[laughs]
188
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:45,318
Ah, lovely talons, grandma.
189
00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:47,440
I bet you could snatch
a woodchuck with these.
190
00:08:48,737 --> 00:08:50,277
[struggles]
191
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:53,533
Oh, no problem.
192
00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:55,446
Happens all the time.
193
00:08:57,078 --> 00:08:59,118
Here we-- here we go. Hold still.
194
00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:02,003
[grunts]
195
00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:03,213
Aww.
196
00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:07,552
Now this is getting personal.
197
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,301
[grunts]
198
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:14,681
[struggles]
199
00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:22,191
All right, who took my hair brush?
200
00:09:22,270 --> 00:09:26,520
Ah, I have to say
it feels good to be a man.
201
00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:29,192
You're gross.
202
00:09:29,277 --> 00:09:32,947
No, I'm not. I'm manly.
203
00:09:33,656 --> 00:09:35,196
[inhales]
204
00:09:35,283 --> 00:09:37,543
[exhales] You can touch it.
It's your hair.
205
00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:40,616
Mom!
206
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:43,325
[Cleo continues screaming]
207
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:46,706
Whoa. Your hair smells like old eggs.
208
00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:52,755
Thank you for watching
my newsstand while I'm gone.
209
00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:54,762
I wrote detailed instructions.
210
00:09:54,844 --> 00:09:56,514
I have a degree in engineering.
211
00:09:56,554 --> 00:09:59,024
I think I know how
to operate a cash register.
212
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:01,019
You also have to make coffee.
213
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:03,811
Oh. Let me look at those.
214
00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:07,566
Ready for the camping trip.
215
00:10:07,649 --> 00:10:08,939
You're not going.
216
00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:11,315
I told you boys this trip is for men only.
217
00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:14,738
Sorry, boys. Maybe next year.
218
00:10:17,409 --> 00:10:20,949
But we did all your work.
Work you said would turn us into men.
219
00:10:21,037 --> 00:10:24,037
So? I didn't promise anything.
220
00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:26,252
You totally played us.
221
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:28,630
Okay, yeah. I did do that.
222
00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:31,376
We're not going?
223
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:34,014
But I got extra allergy shots.
224
00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:35,182
Oh, we're going.
225
00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:36,850
But you heard Mr. Poulos.
226
00:10:36,928 --> 00:10:39,058
Pesto, we are men.
227
00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:41,519
When a man gets permission
from his mother to do something,
228
00:10:41,599 --> 00:10:42,639
he does it!
229
00:10:45,895 --> 00:10:47,605
[Crash laughs]
230
00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:50,145
♪ Crash ♪
231
00:10:50,233 --> 00:10:52,613
-Huh.
-We made it to the cabin.
232
00:10:52,694 --> 00:10:54,904
[men laughing]
233
00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:56,528
What do you think they're doing in there?
234
00:10:56,614 --> 00:10:57,914
Guy stuff.
235
00:10:58,575 --> 00:11:00,735
Probably welding. Maybe arm wrestling.
236
00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:03,407
I hope so. I have my big arm.
237
00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:06,464
Well, let's get in there.
238
00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:09,251
Wait, what if I'm not ready?
239
00:11:09,336 --> 00:11:12,956
Then get ready
because there's no turning back.
240
00:11:13,048 --> 00:11:15,628
I don't know what we're gonna see
on the other side of that door,
241
00:11:15,717 --> 00:11:17,257
but it will be manly.
242
00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:19,761
Not as manly as my big arm,
243
00:11:20,555 --> 00:11:22,635
but it will change us forever.
244
00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:29,767
[soft music playing]
245
00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:31,356
[Wyatt] What's this?
246
00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:33,441
Hey, what are you kids doing here?
247
00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:37,656
Um, looking for the man's weekend.
248
00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:40,239
Will one of you ladies
tell me where that is?
249
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,080
I told you I didn't want you kids here.
250
00:11:47,165 --> 00:11:49,075
My mom signed the permission slip.
251
00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:52,207
Yeah, I'm a professional teacher.
This is legit.
252
00:11:53,171 --> 00:11:56,131
This is not a field trip.
This is a men's weekend.
253
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:58,966
And it's all about getting away
from noise and kids!
254
00:12:04,099 --> 00:12:05,679
You hear that, Poulos?
255
00:12:06,810 --> 00:12:08,060
Silence.
256
00:12:08,144 --> 00:12:10,904
Yeah, this is nice.
257
00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:12,270
[sighs]
258
00:12:13,942 --> 00:12:15,442
-[Crash sighs]
-[Pesto sighs]
259
00:12:15,527 --> 00:12:16,777
[sighs]
260
00:12:16,861 --> 00:12:19,281
Echo! Echo! Echo!
261
00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:21,244
Hey, I have an echo.
262
00:12:21,324 --> 00:12:23,664
It's not an echo.
You're just saying it over and over.
263
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,333
No I'm not! No I'm not!
264
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:27,502
Be quiet! Be quiet!
265
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:30,000
No, you be quiet! You be quiet!
266
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:32,463
Don't make me come
over there! Over there!
267
00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:34,004
That's it, buddy!
268
00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:37,920
This is your fault, Wyatt.
I told you I didn't want you on this trip.
269
00:12:38,550 --> 00:12:40,090
Yeah, well, you wouldn't even be here
270
00:12:40,176 --> 00:12:42,296
if you hadn't tricked us
into doing your work for you.
271
00:12:42,387 --> 00:12:43,597
I didn't trick you.
272
00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:44,810
Yes, you did.
273
00:12:44,889 --> 00:12:46,139
Hey, take it outside.
274
00:12:46,808 --> 00:12:48,558
Get it? We are outside.
275
00:12:48,643 --> 00:12:51,483
Get ready to laugh, fellas.
I'm feeling it this weekend.
276
00:12:53,732 --> 00:12:57,492
[coach] I continued through the flowers
until I caught up with the boy.
277
00:12:57,569 --> 00:13:01,109
That's when I realized... he was me.
278
00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:04,947
Great dream journal, coach.
279
00:13:06,578 --> 00:13:08,748
This is lame.
280
00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:11,620
Where's the adventure?
And the trash talking?
281
00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:15,588
The random encounters
with mountain people?
282
00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:19,046
Only he who has the share stick may speak.
283
00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:19,972
DeSean.
284
00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:23,184
I left my dream journal at home.
285
00:13:24,888 --> 00:13:27,678
Again? That's three years
in a row, Jackson.
286
00:13:27,766 --> 00:13:30,266
Wait a minute. DeSean Jackson?
287
00:13:30,352 --> 00:13:32,312
The DeSean Jackson?
288
00:13:32,395 --> 00:13:33,975
No way!
289
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,358
Who's DeSean Jackson?
290
00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:40,356
Just the greatest wide receiver there is.
291
00:13:40,445 --> 00:13:42,065
He's my favorite player!
292
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:45,409
I'm sorry, DeSean.
Crash doesn't know much about football.
293
00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:47,042
Or anything.
294
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:50,115
When did you get here?
295
00:13:50,205 --> 00:13:52,285
I've been here,
but I've been in the bathroom.
296
00:13:52,916 --> 00:13:54,996
I love chili, but chili doesn't like me.
297
00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,209
Well, you have the share stick, DeSean.
298
00:13:58,296 --> 00:13:59,586
We're doing fears.
299
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:02,836
Okay, fears. I'm afraid of birds.
300
00:14:02,926 --> 00:14:05,386
-[laughs]
-What?
301
00:14:05,470 --> 00:14:07,680
DeSean Jackson's afraid of birds?
302
00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:10,104
Dude, you play for the Eagles.
303
00:14:10,725 --> 00:14:13,345
As long as I stay away
from that mascot, I'm cool.
304
00:14:16,648 --> 00:14:18,478
All right. I'm afraid of ticks.
305
00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:20,646
I'm gonna take off my shirt.
If you could check my back--
306
00:14:20,735 --> 00:14:22,105
[men groan]
307
00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:23,235
You're good. You're good.
308
00:14:26,241 --> 00:14:27,991
I've never shared this before but--
309
00:14:28,076 --> 00:14:29,786
[men] Bears.
310
00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:31,330
Oh, I've shared that?
311
00:14:32,831 --> 00:14:34,961
I know I don't have the share stick,
312
00:14:35,041 --> 00:14:36,791
but have you guys noticed
that all your fears
313
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:39,166
are things you find on camping trips?
314
00:14:41,256 --> 00:14:43,086
I'm just saying maybe next year...
315
00:14:43,842 --> 00:14:45,012
Vegas?
316
00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:49,311
How about you, Crash?
What are you afraid of?
317
00:14:50,015 --> 00:14:52,225
Well, since we're sharing,
318
00:14:52,726 --> 00:14:55,596
I'm afraid of ghosts.
319
00:14:56,479 --> 00:14:59,439
[Crash uproariously laughs]
320
00:14:59,524 --> 00:15:04,364
No I'm only afraid
I'll end up like you losers.
321
00:15:04,446 --> 00:15:07,486
-Boo-hoo-hoo bears.
-Hey.
322
00:15:07,574 --> 00:15:10,414
Boo-hoo-hoo birds.
323
00:15:10,493 --> 00:15:12,123
That's not cool, dude.
324
00:15:12,203 --> 00:15:15,253
I'm sorry. I have the stick.
325
00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:18,209
When can I share my fears?
326
00:15:18,293 --> 00:15:19,923
Do I have to pick just one?
327
00:15:20,003 --> 00:15:22,263
What if I'm afraid
you won't like the one I pick?
328
00:15:23,131 --> 00:15:25,051
Oh, fire's getting low.
329
00:15:26,092 --> 00:15:27,142
Hey!
330
00:15:27,218 --> 00:15:28,718
That's the share stick, you dope.
331
00:15:28,803 --> 00:15:30,103
You know the rules. No yelling.
332
00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:31,891
My cabin. My rules!
333
00:15:31,973 --> 00:15:34,313
I'm about five minutes
away from getting miffed.
334
00:15:34,392 --> 00:15:35,732
Miff this!
335
00:15:38,313 --> 00:15:40,023
Uh, uh!
336
00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:45,614
This is for eating all the chili!
337
00:15:45,695 --> 00:15:47,655
You messed
with the wrong campfire, buddy.
338
00:15:47,739 --> 00:15:49,069
Oh, yeah, chili-eater? Come here--
339
00:15:49,157 --> 00:15:51,117
Now this is a man's weekend.
340
00:15:51,201 --> 00:15:53,871
-[all struggle and grunt]
-[Crash] Take this.
341
00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:55,293
[grunting continues]
342
00:15:55,372 --> 00:15:58,252
Oh, you think you're so fast, huh?
Oh, yeah?
343
00:15:58,333 --> 00:15:59,793
[DeSean] Well, come on.
344
00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:02,376
[DeSean grunting]
345
00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:04,592
That is right! That is right!
346
00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:07,633
[strangled grunts]
347
00:16:07,717 --> 00:16:09,837
Should I ask DeSean for an autograph?
348
00:16:09,928 --> 00:16:12,138
Or wait till he's done pounding on Crash?
349
00:16:12,222 --> 00:16:13,972
You're going down, purple.
350
00:16:14,057 --> 00:16:15,887
Oh, look. Bird!
351
00:16:20,563 --> 00:16:23,983
Phew! For a wide receiver,
that guy can really kick.
352
00:16:25,026 --> 00:16:28,446
For a guy who's been making fun of men
all weekend, you can really cry.
353
00:16:29,656 --> 00:16:31,026
Thanks, Bernstein.
354
00:16:31,116 --> 00:16:32,276
Oh, beam me.
355
00:16:35,245 --> 00:16:37,745
Whoa! You're really good
at shadow puppets.
356
00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:40,131
All I can do is a peace sign and a hand.
357
00:16:42,252 --> 00:16:43,212
Really?
358
00:16:44,921 --> 00:16:46,801
Watch this. Here's a moose.
359
00:16:46,881 --> 00:16:48,841
Mooose.
360
00:16:49,801 --> 00:16:51,221
Here's a fat bird.
361
00:16:51,970 --> 00:16:55,430
[chirps]
362
00:16:57,142 --> 00:16:58,642
The New York skyline.
363
00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:01,437
Na-na-na.
364
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:02,901
The moon landing.
365
00:17:02,981 --> 00:17:06,111
[radar beeps]
366
00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:07,902
And my specialty, a bear.
367
00:17:07,986 --> 00:17:09,896
[Crash growls]
368
00:17:09,988 --> 00:17:12,408
-[Wyatt] Whoa.
-[Crash continues growls]
369
00:17:13,074 --> 00:17:14,124
[Pesto] Hey, DeSean.
370
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,790
I know you're in the bathroom,
371
00:17:15,869 --> 00:17:17,789
but is this a good time for an autograph?
372
00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:19,791
[DeSean] Does it smell like a good time?
373
00:17:21,791 --> 00:17:23,001
Guys, uh...
374
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:26,550
I'd like to apologize
for my behavior earlier.
375
00:17:26,629 --> 00:17:27,799
Do you feel it?
376
00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:30,551
That's the transformative power
of forgiveness.
377
00:17:30,633 --> 00:17:31,893
I do.
378
00:17:34,137 --> 00:17:36,467
Anyway, coach, I'm sorry I pushed you.
379
00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:38,886
I'm sorry I stomped on your hand
when you were on the ground.
380
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:39,975
That was you?
381
00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:41,480
What did you expect? You pushed me.
382
00:17:41,561 --> 00:17:43,441
-Bear!
-Hey, no name calling!
383
00:17:43,521 --> 00:17:45,731
-Bear!
-Fine! Manatee!
384
00:17:45,815 --> 00:17:47,975
There's a bear right there!
385
00:17:50,445 --> 00:17:52,105
Every year with the bears.
386
00:17:52,197 --> 00:17:54,197
This is because you didn't get a nap.
387
00:17:54,949 --> 00:17:56,829
I know what I saw.
388
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,250
Wyatt and Crash are outside,
somebody's got to save them.
389
00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:01,120
Well, at least Wyatt.
390
00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:04,500
[screams] Get out of here, bear!
391
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:05,464
Bear? Where?
392
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:09,667
You thought that was a real bear?
393
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:10,876
[laughs]
394
00:18:10,965 --> 00:18:13,465
-It was just a shadow puppet.
-[Crash] Yeah.
395
00:18:15,845 --> 00:18:18,675
That's it! You have ruined
this entire weekend.
396
00:18:18,765 --> 00:18:20,595
You made a mockery of the share stick.
397
00:18:20,684 --> 00:18:22,394
You turned the campfire into a brawl.
398
00:18:22,477 --> 00:18:24,647
Oh, I love reminiscing.
399
00:18:24,729 --> 00:18:27,689
When do we get to the part
when you were scared by a shadow?
400
00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:29,940
This is great.
401
00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:31,606
Now I got to go back in there
402
00:18:31,695 --> 00:18:33,735
and admit to the guys
that it wasn't a real bear.
403
00:18:33,822 --> 00:18:36,702
Just scaredy-cat Poulos
overreacting again.
404
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:38,993
I'm sure they won't give you a hard time.
405
00:18:39,077 --> 00:18:41,957
Are you kidding? They're men.
They live for busting chops.
406
00:18:42,038 --> 00:18:45,418
Believe, you, me,
these chops will be busted!
407
00:18:50,088 --> 00:18:51,838
He seems really upset.
408
00:18:51,923 --> 00:18:52,973
I know.
409
00:18:53,967 --> 00:18:55,387
Let's go inside and make fun of him.
410
00:18:56,011 --> 00:18:58,011
No. We need to help him out.
411
00:18:58,096 --> 00:18:59,306
I know what to do.
412
00:18:59,347 --> 00:19:01,427
Oh, me too.
413
00:19:03,018 --> 00:19:05,018
So how'd the big bear hunt go?
414
00:19:05,103 --> 00:19:07,693
[laughter]
415
00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:11,152
Yeah, what was it this time? A Possum?
416
00:19:11,234 --> 00:19:12,744
[laughter continues]
417
00:19:12,819 --> 00:19:14,989
All right. All right. Have your fun.
418
00:19:15,071 --> 00:19:17,241
Now you know there wasn't really a bear.
419
00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:19,413
-No, more like a beast.
-What?
420
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:22,950
Crash and I were cornered
by the biggest bear I've ever seen.
421
00:19:23,038 --> 00:19:25,078
Mr. Poulos came out and scared it away.
422
00:19:25,165 --> 00:19:26,115
Yeah.
423
00:19:26,207 --> 00:19:27,957
Yeah! That's what happened.
424
00:19:28,043 --> 00:19:29,383
Oh-ho-ho.
425
00:19:29,461 --> 00:19:31,131
Now you know the whole heroic story,
426
00:19:31,212 --> 00:19:32,842
let's break out the jigsaw puzzles.
427
00:19:32,922 --> 00:19:34,922
Wait, wait, wait.
What kind of bear was it?
428
00:19:35,008 --> 00:19:36,798
I don't know. A big kind.
429
00:19:36,885 --> 00:19:39,045
What's it gonna be?
Ponies or hot air balloon?
430
00:19:39,137 --> 00:19:41,387
Wait a minute. You scared off a bear?
431
00:19:41,473 --> 00:19:43,683
That does not sound like you.
432
00:19:43,767 --> 00:19:45,437
Why not? It's possible.
433
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:46,978
It's more than possible.
434
00:19:47,062 --> 00:19:48,982
It was the most manly
thing I've ever seen.
435
00:19:49,064 --> 00:19:51,904
Well, I've never heard
of a kid telling a lie.
436
00:19:52,942 --> 00:19:54,442
Poulos, you are a man among men.
437
00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:55,987
Yes, you are.
438
00:19:56,071 --> 00:19:58,371
You're gonna get
the first cup of hot cocoa.
439
00:19:58,448 --> 00:20:00,578
I even brought tiny marshmallows.
440
00:20:03,912 --> 00:20:05,582
Hey, thanks, Wyatt.
441
00:20:05,663 --> 00:20:07,043
You really saved my bacon.
442
00:20:07,957 --> 00:20:10,377
-I'm sorry I yelled at you and Crash.
-That's all right.
443
00:20:11,252 --> 00:20:12,632
Wait. Where is Crash?
444
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,166
Poulos, you're in luck.
445
00:20:15,256 --> 00:20:16,966
I found a bear.
446
00:20:17,050 --> 00:20:19,300
Now they'll all believe you.
447
00:20:19,386 --> 00:20:20,966
A bear? A bear!
448
00:20:21,054 --> 00:20:22,564
[Wyatt] Oh, no, no, no.
449
00:20:23,765 --> 00:20:26,095
[growling]
450
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:28,056
Oh, he looks mad.
451
00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:30,654
He should be. We stole his berries.
452
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,440
[laughs]
453
00:20:32,524 --> 00:20:34,944
Here's your last man lesson.
Don't get eaten.
454
00:20:36,277 --> 00:20:38,357
Whoa! Oh, oh!
455
00:20:38,446 --> 00:20:39,486
[gasps]
456
00:20:39,572 --> 00:20:41,452
[shivers in fright]
457
00:20:41,533 --> 00:20:43,243
Nice-- nice bear.
458
00:20:43,326 --> 00:20:45,446
[roars]
459
00:20:45,537 --> 00:20:46,997
You have lots of teeth.
460
00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:49,620
-[roars]
-[screams]
461
00:20:49,708 --> 00:20:50,628
[pants]
462
00:20:50,709 --> 00:20:52,379
Let me in! Let me in!
Let me in! Let me in!
463
00:20:52,460 --> 00:20:53,590
[growling continues]
464
00:20:53,670 --> 00:20:56,010
This was a bad day
to wear salmon underpants.
465
00:20:56,089 --> 00:20:57,339
Ahh!
466
00:20:58,216 --> 00:21:01,466
Bernstein!
467
00:21:01,553 --> 00:21:03,143
[whimpers]
468
00:21:03,221 --> 00:21:04,931
[roars]
469
00:21:07,267 --> 00:21:08,767
Now that is scary.
470
00:21:09,644 --> 00:21:12,194
I've never seen jaws that powerful.
471
00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:14,522
-[coach giggling]
-[Crash strains]
472
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:17,647
Ha! Ho! Go easy on the pinky.
I'm sensitive.
473
00:21:17,736 --> 00:21:19,276
[giggles]
474
00:21:19,904 --> 00:21:21,204
When you're done, I'm next.
475
00:21:21,281 --> 00:21:23,661
Oh, sure thing, Mr. Poulos.
476
00:21:24,826 --> 00:21:25,736
Oh!
477
00:21:26,619 --> 00:21:28,539
Spend a little extra time
on the pinky toe.
478
00:21:28,621 --> 00:21:30,211
It stepped in bear poo.
479
00:21:30,290 --> 00:21:32,670
-[muffled scream]
-Yeah, there you go.
480
00:21:33,918 --> 00:21:36,338
♪ Crash and Bern , hard core ♪
481
00:21:37,422 --> 00:21:38,762
♪ Bass, bass ♪
482
00:21:43,219 --> 00:21:44,049
♪ What ♪
483
00:21:47,015 --> 00:21:48,635
♪ That's what friends are for ♪
484
00:21:48,725 --> 00:21:50,055
♪ Crash and Bern ♪
485
00:21:50,143 --> 00:21:51,313
♪ Tear it up, dude ♪
486
00:21:52,771 --> 00:21:53,731
♪ Good call ♪
487
00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:56,323
♪ Crash and BernCrash and Bern ♪
488
00:21:56,399 --> 00:21:59,149
-♪ I said, "Stein" ♪
-♪ What he said ♪
34407
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