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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 -== [ www.OpenSubtitles.org ] ==- 2 00:00:14,147 --> 00:00:15,712 *SHAMEKESS HALL OF FAME* Season 01 Episode 04 3 00:00:15,796 --> 00:00:17,071 Episode Title: "Debbie, Carl, Liam: They Grow up So Fast" 4 00:00:17,156 --> 00:00:19,164 All right, now you take the needle, 5 00:00:19,249 --> 00:00:21,709 and you scoop the loop. 6 00:00:21,793 --> 00:00:24,003 All right, then you pull it through. 7 00:00:24,102 --> 00:00:25,434 - Ow, fuck! - Pull it tight. 8 00:00:25,518 --> 00:00:27,102 When the hell does this turn into a pillow? 9 00:00:27,186 --> 00:00:28,770 What are you doing? 10 00:00:28,854 --> 00:00:30,188 Knitting. 11 00:00:30,272 --> 00:00:32,232 You making another self-sculpture? 12 00:00:32,316 --> 00:00:34,025 Looks just like you. 13 00:00:34,109 --> 00:00:35,777 Fuck off. 14 00:00:35,861 --> 00:00:38,530 - What, another weed bread? - Yeah, makes some good money. 15 00:00:38,614 --> 00:00:40,824 Well, there goes my pandemic girlfriend. 16 00:00:40,908 --> 00:00:42,200 You have a girlfriend? 17 00:00:42,284 --> 00:00:44,327 Had. Sasha just broke up with me. 18 00:00:44,411 --> 00:00:46,872 Sasha? 19 00:00:46,956 --> 00:00:49,499 I even changed my name to "Liam Rodenstein." 20 00:00:49,583 --> 00:00:51,543 Thought if being a Black Jew worked for Drake, 21 00:00:51,627 --> 00:00:52,627 it might work for me. 22 00:00:52,711 --> 00:00:54,671 - It didn't? - Almost. 23 00:00:54,755 --> 00:00:56,882 Till she found out I'm a Gallagher. 24 00:00:56,966 --> 00:00:58,425 What's going on? 25 00:00:58,509 --> 00:01:00,177 Frank, drunk, looking for a bed. 26 00:01:00,261 --> 00:01:02,096 - Who the hell let him? - Debbie? 27 00:01:02,181 --> 00:01:03,736 Why can't he sleep out on the porch? 28 00:01:03,821 --> 00:01:04,806 It's warm enough. 29 00:01:04,890 --> 00:01:07,031 I want my bed back! 30 00:01:07,116 --> 00:01:08,445 Oh, hell no! 31 00:01:10,604 --> 00:01:11,605 Morning, Frank. 32 00:01:11,689 --> 00:01:13,231 This is my house! 33 00:01:13,315 --> 00:01:15,568 It's okay, Daddy. You can sleep in my room. 34 00:01:16,610 --> 00:01:18,445 Debbie stole a baby. 35 00:01:18,529 --> 00:01:20,280 - Why? - It's Debbie. 36 00:01:20,364 --> 00:01:21,740 Why would you steal a little boy 37 00:01:21,824 --> 00:01:23,283 and dress him like a little girl? 38 00:01:23,367 --> 00:01:25,392 You took away Aunt Ginger. 39 00:01:25,477 --> 00:01:26,498 Who is Aunt Ginger? 40 00:01:26,583 --> 00:01:28,538 Social Security wants to talk to Ginger, 41 00:01:28,622 --> 00:01:30,790 and he was too lazy to go get the real one. 42 00:01:30,874 --> 00:01:32,265 - She's dead. - No! 43 00:01:32,350 --> 00:01:33,668 Debs, you never met her. 44 00:01:33,752 --> 00:01:35,587 And now I never will. 45 00:01:35,671 --> 00:01:37,339 - I'm in mourning. - When did she die? 46 00:01:37,423 --> 00:01:39,758 Twelve years ago. 47 00:01:39,842 --> 00:01:42,381 You've been cashing her checks. That's a felony. 48 00:01:42,466 --> 00:01:44,054 - What are we gonna do now? - Well... 49 00:01:44,138 --> 00:01:46,181 - I like that one. - Too lucid. 50 00:01:46,265 --> 00:01:47,516 What about her? 51 00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:50,769 Everything is just the way I remember it. 52 00:01:57,192 --> 00:01:59,611 - She was my friend. - Why did you take the boy? 53 00:01:59,695 --> 00:02:01,092 He was crying, and nobody cared. 54 00:02:01,177 --> 00:02:02,656 - So I took him. - How'd you get him out? 55 00:02:02,740 --> 00:02:05,408 I waved a Snickers bar at him. 56 00:02:05,492 --> 00:02:08,411 Dear Lord, thank you for this food that we're about to eat, 57 00:02:08,495 --> 00:02:10,163 and please make my brother Clayton 58 00:02:10,247 --> 00:02:12,749 burn in hell for all eternity when the time comes. 59 00:02:12,833 --> 00:02:13,959 Amen. 60 00:02:14,043 --> 00:02:15,377 Amen. 61 00:02:16,879 --> 00:02:20,382 Liam, if you want a Popsicle, show me your hands. 62 00:02:20,466 --> 00:02:22,008 Hands off your package, or no treat! 63 00:02:22,092 --> 00:02:24,135 - I need my own room. - Carl, quit it. 64 00:02:24,219 --> 00:02:26,721 - I'm gonna be a woman soon. - Enough. 65 00:02:26,805 --> 00:02:27,973 I can't be in the same room 66 00:02:28,057 --> 00:02:29,975 where Liam is constantly masturbating. 67 00:02:30,059 --> 00:02:31,935 It's not masturbating if nothing comes out. 68 00:02:32,019 --> 00:02:34,062 Please, let me catch my breath 69 00:02:34,146 --> 00:02:36,064 - Shh. - It's 1:00 a.m. 70 00:02:36,148 --> 00:02:37,983 Is that our Halloween candy? 71 00:02:38,067 --> 00:02:40,193 - Movie night. - We have school in the morning. 72 00:02:40,277 --> 00:02:42,946 - Paranormal Activity 3. - Right? 73 00:02:43,030 --> 00:02:44,781 My buddy shot this at the AMC. 74 00:02:44,865 --> 00:02:45,907 Okay please 75 00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:48,451 - It's rated R. - For "really fucking scary." 76 00:02:48,535 --> 00:02:49,869 So sit there and learn. 77 00:02:49,953 --> 00:02:51,450 Whoa! 78 00:02:51,535 --> 00:02:53,678 - Get him in the coffin. - Watch your head. 79 00:02:53,763 --> 00:02:55,584 Looks dead. Hey, Carl, more ice. 80 00:02:55,668 --> 00:02:57,377 - Got it. - Sorry for your loss. 81 00:02:57,461 --> 00:03:00,755 It was a shock. 82 00:03:00,839 --> 00:03:02,424 I know you're faking it. Come on! 83 00:03:02,508 --> 00:03:04,551 What's the matter with you? Look at him, he's dead. 84 00:03:04,635 --> 00:03:06,803 - And you'll be going? - Soon as he's in the ground. 85 00:03:09,098 --> 00:03:11,016 We need something to put in the coffin. 86 00:03:12,935 --> 00:03:14,603 Okay. 87 00:03:14,687 --> 00:03:15,979 Ready? 88 00:03:16,063 --> 00:03:17,147 Lift. 89 00:03:17,231 --> 00:03:19,608 Wait, she broke up with you because you're a Gallagher? 90 00:03:19,692 --> 00:03:22,139 Yeah, says we're all crazy. 91 00:03:22,224 --> 00:03:23,528 Fuck that. I'll fucking kill her. 92 00:03:23,612 --> 00:03:24,492 - Are you in? - I'm in. 93 00:03:24,577 --> 00:03:26,072 We can inject the vid into this bread. 94 00:03:26,156 --> 00:03:28,450 Leave it on her front steps. She'll never see it coming. 95 00:03:28,534 --> 00:03:30,118 I don't think that's how that works. 96 00:03:30,203 --> 00:03:31,786 What are you, some kind of doctor? 97 00:03:31,870 --> 00:03:33,705 You're both crazy. 98 00:03:33,789 --> 00:03:34,998 Tough break. 99 00:03:35,082 --> 00:03:36,583 Fuck you. He said both of us. 100 00:03:36,667 --> 00:03:38,877 - I'm not crazy! - Huh. 101 00:03:43,215 --> 00:03:45,069 Watering the plants. Ha! 102 00:03:45,194 --> 00:03:46,509 I'm done with the flyer. 103 00:03:46,593 --> 00:03:48,386 It's "fundraiser," not "fun razor." 104 00:03:48,470 --> 00:03:50,513 Want to make them think someone's getting cut. 105 00:03:51,432 --> 00:03:52,724 No, no, no, no, no, no. 106 00:03:52,808 --> 00:03:54,851 The bat is for killing, not for taking to school. 107 00:03:54,935 --> 00:03:58,146 Didn't Fiona tell you to stop electrocuting dolls? 108 00:03:58,230 --> 00:04:00,231 They have to pay for their sins. 109 00:04:00,315 --> 00:04:02,106 I want to go to the forest and kill something. 110 00:04:02,190 --> 00:04:04,611 The kids have been making papier-mâché sculptures. 111 00:04:04,695 --> 00:04:06,029 This is Carl's. 112 00:04:06,113 --> 00:04:08,156 A papier-mâché pile of shit. 113 00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:10,662 Who in the hell is raising this degenerate? 114 00:04:10,747 --> 00:04:11,843 You should be coloring me 115 00:04:11,927 --> 00:04:13,290 a thank-you note of gratitude 116 00:04:13,375 --> 00:04:14,746 that the half of you that came from me 117 00:04:14,830 --> 00:04:16,425 wasn't spooged on your mother's neck, 118 00:04:16,510 --> 00:04:18,541 but instead was guided by yours truly 119 00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:21,044 to get up inside of her to start the life of you. 120 00:04:21,128 --> 00:04:23,588 So walk and talk with gratitude, son. 121 00:04:23,672 --> 00:04:25,757 I was just kidding. 122 00:04:27,468 --> 00:04:29,135 - How's your head? - Little dizzy. 123 00:04:29,219 --> 00:04:31,179 You're fine. Go eat some breakfast. 124 00:04:31,263 --> 00:04:32,514 Don't set the house on fire. 125 00:04:32,598 --> 00:04:34,516 Just kidding. 126 00:04:35,642 --> 00:04:38,604 Yo, yo, yo, Destructo, that's my toaster! 127 00:04:44,777 --> 00:04:45,777 What? 128 00:04:48,697 --> 00:04:49,847 Oh, shit! 129 00:04:49,932 --> 00:04:50,958 Where'd Carl go? 130 00:04:51,043 --> 00:04:53,618 - Ninja! - Carl, no! 131 00:04:53,702 --> 00:04:55,078 Ah! 132 00:04:56,580 --> 00:04:58,581 - No! - Shit! 133 00:04:58,665 --> 00:05:00,542 Shit, Carl. 134 00:05:00,626 --> 00:05:01,919 That actually kinda worked. 135 00:05:10,594 --> 00:05:13,596 - It's his first offense. - His first criminal offense. 136 00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:16,349 He's got double digit suspensions at school. 137 00:05:16,433 --> 00:05:18,268 If you pick on asshead again, 138 00:05:18,352 --> 00:05:20,478 I'm gonna chew your nuts off with my teeth. 139 00:05:20,562 --> 00:05:22,197 Heard you talking about my little brother Liam 140 00:05:22,281 --> 00:05:23,022 on the bus this morning. 141 00:05:23,106 --> 00:05:25,358 You mean your retarded brother? 142 00:05:25,442 --> 00:05:27,861 He sent three kids home with concussions, 143 00:05:27,945 --> 00:05:29,696 two with busted eardrums... 144 00:05:29,780 --> 00:05:30,905 I think you broke my nose. 145 00:05:30,989 --> 00:05:32,991 ...and one with a ruptured testicle. 146 00:05:33,075 --> 00:05:35,118 It was gym. Decided to play kickball. 147 00:05:35,202 --> 00:05:38,037 - What if he shows remorse? - What's that? 148 00:05:38,121 --> 00:05:40,331 - It means you say you're sorry. - I'm not. 149 00:05:40,415 --> 00:05:42,584 Lie. 150 00:05:42,668 --> 00:05:44,085 Shot a duck. 151 00:05:44,169 --> 00:05:46,379 That's no duck. That's a bald eagle. 152 00:05:58,934 --> 00:06:00,602 Ahhhh! 153 00:06:00,686 --> 00:06:03,563 Okay, I guess we are a little crazy. 154 00:06:03,647 --> 00:06:06,858 Yeah, well, can you blame us? Look at our parents. 155 00:06:06,942 --> 00:06:08,067 Monica. 156 00:06:08,151 --> 00:06:09,903 You wanna go shopping? 157 00:06:09,987 --> 00:06:12,405 Oh, pretty girls' day out! 158 00:06:12,489 --> 00:06:14,240 Come on, let's go. Whoa! 159 00:06:14,324 --> 00:06:15,950 I got it. 160 00:06:16,034 --> 00:06:18,870 ...why anyone would go to the zoo sober. 161 00:06:18,954 --> 00:06:21,873 Hey, you having fun back there? 162 00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:24,876 Ah, Debbie. 163 00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:25,919 Hi, honey. 164 00:06:26,003 --> 00:06:27,045 Debs, now. 165 00:06:27,129 --> 00:06:29,005 Debs, you wanna come play? 166 00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:30,507 - Yeah. - No. 167 00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:31,883 Monica's gotta go. 168 00:06:31,967 --> 00:06:33,760 She's your mother, Fi. 169 00:06:33,844 --> 00:06:35,220 You only get one. 170 00:06:35,304 --> 00:06:37,806 It's like watching a hurricane head for shore. 171 00:06:37,890 --> 00:06:39,724 Good morning, sweetheart. 172 00:06:39,808 --> 00:06:40,850 Mom. 173 00:06:40,934 --> 00:06:42,754 We don't have any money. 174 00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:44,062 Oh, Liam! 175 00:06:44,146 --> 00:06:47,482 Look at you, my little brown bear. 176 00:06:47,566 --> 00:06:49,442 Oh, look how big you are. 177 00:06:49,526 --> 00:06:52,571 - How long is she staying? - Only forever and a day. 178 00:06:53,822 --> 00:06:55,573 I think this must be the place. 179 00:06:55,657 --> 00:06:57,325 Can I get out? It's hot in here. 180 00:06:57,409 --> 00:06:59,599 - No. - Ow! 181 00:06:59,684 --> 00:07:00,370 Frank. 182 00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:01,538 I came to get you out. 183 00:07:01,622 --> 00:07:04,123 I told you, I don't want out. 184 00:07:04,207 --> 00:07:05,667 Stop. 185 00:07:05,751 --> 00:07:07,669 Did you come? 186 00:07:07,753 --> 00:07:09,420 This is Jill. 187 00:07:09,504 --> 00:07:12,590 Jill, this is my husband, Frank. 188 00:07:15,636 --> 00:07:16,887 Oops. 189 00:07:18,847 --> 00:07:20,890 Mom? 190 00:07:20,974 --> 00:07:23,768 Come on, you and me. We can take the new car. 191 00:07:23,852 --> 00:07:25,311 Can't get enough Carl and Mommy time. 192 00:07:25,395 --> 00:07:26,563 Do you need some new clothes? 193 00:07:26,647 --> 00:07:28,147 We could stop at JCPenney. 194 00:07:28,231 --> 00:07:29,399 Hm. I can drive. 195 00:07:29,483 --> 00:07:31,067 No. Do you have a license? 196 00:07:31,151 --> 00:07:33,069 Quick, quick, Carl, switch places. 197 00:07:33,153 --> 00:07:34,904 Come on. 198 00:07:34,988 --> 00:07:36,364 Hi. 199 00:07:36,448 --> 00:07:38,825 You're supposed to be wearing your seatbelt. 200 00:07:39,868 --> 00:07:41,911 Shit, Carl, I shrunk your jersey. 201 00:07:41,995 --> 00:07:44,914 - I thought you were Carl. - This is Little Hank. 202 00:07:44,998 --> 00:07:46,875 - That's your mom? - Hey, handsome. 203 00:07:46,959 --> 00:07:49,335 Made some cookies. They're on the table. 204 00:07:54,883 --> 00:07:58,052 I love you, Debbie! 205 00:07:58,136 --> 00:07:59,262 Yeah, and Frank. 206 00:07:59,346 --> 00:08:01,473 Who was around just enough to fuck us up. 207 00:08:03,058 --> 00:08:04,642 Cancer? 208 00:08:06,395 --> 00:08:08,313 How did I get cancer? 209 00:08:08,397 --> 00:08:10,440 You musta caught it from Grammy, son. 210 00:08:10,524 --> 00:08:13,151 If she had known that she had the contagious kind, 211 00:08:13,235 --> 00:08:14,917 I don't think she would've spent so much time with you 212 00:08:15,001 --> 00:08:16,779 in the basement, cooking meth. 213 00:08:16,863 --> 00:08:18,031 Excuse me. 214 00:08:18,115 --> 00:08:20,325 My grandmother's having an allergy attack, 215 00:08:20,409 --> 00:08:22,035 and I need to buy her some SUDAFED, 216 00:08:22,119 --> 00:08:24,829 but I'm under 18, and her driver's license was revoked. 217 00:08:24,913 --> 00:08:27,081 Can you please buy it for her? 218 00:08:27,259 --> 00:08:28,392 You making meth? 219 00:08:28,524 --> 00:08:30,544 Free rock when we're up and running. 220 00:08:32,004 --> 00:08:33,379 Am I going to die? 221 00:08:36,299 --> 00:08:37,467 I hope not. 222 00:08:37,551 --> 00:08:40,303 But right now, we have to fight 223 00:08:40,387 --> 00:08:42,389 and fight hard. 224 00:08:43,306 --> 00:08:45,851 You ready to fight with me, Carl? 225 00:08:48,186 --> 00:08:50,021 Why do we have to shave it? 226 00:08:50,105 --> 00:08:52,273 Didn't you ever see any shows about cancer? 227 00:08:52,357 --> 00:08:54,860 Cancer people are always bald. 228 00:08:59,156 --> 00:09:02,200 Jeez, I'm gonna look like a penis. 229 00:09:03,702 --> 00:09:05,578 I'll get you a hat. 230 00:09:05,662 --> 00:09:07,747 I'll get you a hat. 231 00:09:11,126 --> 00:09:13,252 This is nice, the two of us just hanging out, 232 00:09:13,336 --> 00:09:14,420 getting to know each other. 233 00:09:14,504 --> 00:09:15,922 We should do this more often. 234 00:09:16,006 --> 00:09:17,882 Wanna snort the next batch? 235 00:09:17,966 --> 00:09:18,800 No. 236 00:09:18,884 --> 00:09:20,760 My foster gays have a lot of nice stuff. 237 00:09:20,844 --> 00:09:23,805 Are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting? 238 00:09:23,889 --> 00:09:24,973 IPods, computers. 239 00:09:25,057 --> 00:09:26,599 - How often they there? - They work weekends. 240 00:09:26,683 --> 00:09:29,102 - Can you pick a lock? - I have their security code. 241 00:09:33,065 --> 00:09:33,982 That's all right. 242 00:09:34,066 --> 00:09:35,858 Are you good with fractions? 243 00:09:35,942 --> 00:09:36,985 Fractions of what? 244 00:09:37,069 --> 00:09:38,987 Like, if you have 1/16 of an ounce of something, 245 00:09:39,071 --> 00:09:40,905 how many grams would that be? 246 00:09:40,989 --> 00:09:43,324 - Are you dealing drugs? - No. 247 00:09:43,408 --> 00:09:44,575 Basic overview. 248 00:09:44,659 --> 00:09:48,705 You got flaps, half G's, G's, teeners, 8-balls, and ounces. 249 00:09:48,789 --> 00:09:51,749 An ounce is 28 grams, an 8-ball is 3.54, 250 00:09:51,833 --> 00:09:55,545 and a teener is 1.77, but the dealers round down. 251 00:09:55,629 --> 00:09:58,464 So they pocket the extra .35. You following? 252 00:09:58,548 --> 00:09:59,882 I might need to write this down. 253 00:09:59,966 --> 00:10:01,467 - Frank. - Yes, son? 254 00:10:01,551 --> 00:10:05,013 Why would a dude put his penis in another dude's mouth? 255 00:10:05,097 --> 00:10:07,598 Sometimes men discover things about themselves, 256 00:10:07,682 --> 00:10:11,436 like they prefer male genitalia to female genitalia. 257 00:10:11,520 --> 00:10:14,105 So some guys like to lick wieners? 258 00:10:14,189 --> 00:10:16,232 Well, I'm sure at first they're attracted 259 00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:17,775 to each other's build, 260 00:10:17,859 --> 00:10:19,819 and once a connection gets made, 261 00:10:19,903 --> 00:10:21,904 then the wieners get licked. 262 00:10:21,988 --> 00:10:23,156 What are you doing? 263 00:10:23,240 --> 00:10:24,907 Making a little easy summer moolah, 264 00:10:24,991 --> 00:10:25,867 the Gallagher way. 265 00:10:25,951 --> 00:10:27,660 - Where's Liam? - In the car. 266 00:10:27,744 --> 00:10:28,703 Did you crack a window? 267 00:10:28,787 --> 00:10:31,122 Left the engine running for the AC. 268 00:10:31,206 --> 00:10:33,708 You left a toddler in a running car 269 00:10:33,792 --> 00:10:35,585 in this neighborhood? 270 00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:38,921 Stay. Stay down. 271 00:10:39,005 --> 00:10:41,466 Stay down! 272 00:10:43,927 --> 00:10:46,220 What about Fiona? She wasn't so bad. 273 00:10:46,304 --> 00:10:47,597 Who? 274 00:10:49,182 --> 00:10:50,683 Oh! 275 00:10:50,767 --> 00:10:53,478 - Yeah! - Come on, give me that arm. 276 00:10:53,562 --> 00:10:55,438 Liam's breaking it down. 277 00:10:55,522 --> 00:10:57,231 Must be nice not to own a home 278 00:10:57,315 --> 00:10:58,608 and have to deal with this stuff. 279 00:10:58,692 --> 00:11:01,152 Yeah, it gives me more time to buy drugs 280 00:11:01,236 --> 00:11:02,487 and fence stolen goods. 281 00:11:02,571 --> 00:11:04,113 Is something burning? You smell that? 282 00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:05,615 Oh, shit. Shit! 283 00:11:05,699 --> 00:11:07,033 Shit! 284 00:11:07,117 --> 00:11:09,786 Fuck, burn the house down. 285 00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:11,287 Okay, burn the food, too. 286 00:11:11,371 --> 00:11:12,747 I'm going through something here. 287 00:11:12,831 --> 00:11:13,915 Yeah, looks like you went through 288 00:11:13,999 --> 00:11:16,084 about five beverages in an hour, Fiona. 289 00:11:16,168 --> 00:11:17,251 Have another one. 290 00:11:17,335 --> 00:11:19,629 Hey, Hector, is there any way that you could... 291 00:11:19,713 --> 00:11:20,671 I can't this time, Fiona. 292 00:11:20,755 --> 00:11:22,465 It's not the first time we got shut off. 293 00:11:22,549 --> 00:11:23,382 Won't be the last. 294 00:11:23,466 --> 00:11:24,342 Is there any way that you could 295 00:11:24,426 --> 00:11:25,551 scrape the money together today? 296 00:11:25,635 --> 00:11:26,385 We have it. 297 00:11:26,469 --> 00:11:28,554 She just forgot to pay it. 298 00:11:31,892 --> 00:11:33,684 Fiona! 299 00:11:33,768 --> 00:11:35,436 Fiona! 300 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,188 - Oh, shit. - What's on his face? 301 00:11:37,272 --> 00:11:38,272 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 302 00:11:38,356 --> 00:11:39,899 - Step back. - Oh, my God. 303 00:11:39,983 --> 00:11:40,942 Oh, my God. 304 00:11:41,026 --> 00:11:43,236 Ow! Ow! Get off me! 305 00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:45,488 - You are going to that clinic! - You're hurting me! 306 00:11:45,572 --> 00:11:46,739 - Ow! - Stop it! 307 00:11:46,823 --> 00:11:49,867 Help, my sister's trying to force me to get an abortion! 308 00:11:49,951 --> 00:11:51,306 Fiona! 309 00:11:51,391 --> 00:11:52,432 Get off her! 310 00:11:52,517 --> 00:11:56,082 No, we are going to that fucking clinic! 311 00:11:58,210 --> 00:12:00,337 Fucking Gallaghers. 312 00:12:01,963 --> 00:12:03,631 We never stood a chance. 313 00:12:03,715 --> 00:12:05,883 Jeez, no wonder why Liam's so bummed out. 314 00:12:05,967 --> 00:12:07,677 You're the one saying we're crazy. 315 00:12:07,761 --> 00:12:08,845 Why are you coming at me? 316 00:12:11,681 --> 00:12:14,308 I will stab you until you bleed to death 317 00:12:14,392 --> 00:12:15,401 if you don't quit it out. 318 00:12:15,486 --> 00:12:17,436 We gotta empty the pool out, Conrad. 319 00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:18,763 You guys gotta get out of here. 320 00:12:18,848 --> 00:12:21,149 Go screw this end of the hose into Tony's spigot 321 00:12:21,233 --> 00:12:22,483 so we can siphon the water out. 322 00:12:22,567 --> 00:12:24,735 Or we could just do it this way. 323 00:12:24,819 --> 00:12:26,279 Carl! 324 00:12:26,363 --> 00:12:27,989 I'll patch it up next summer. 325 00:12:28,073 --> 00:12:29,490 See ya. 326 00:12:29,574 --> 00:12:31,868 Good luck getting laid smelling like fried dough all day. 327 00:12:31,952 --> 00:12:33,828 You always smell like that. What's your excuse? 328 00:12:33,912 --> 00:12:35,746 Bitches and hormones. 329 00:12:35,830 --> 00:12:37,498 Ha. 330 00:12:38,541 --> 00:12:39,959 Ew, don't learn from him, Liam. 331 00:12:40,043 --> 00:12:41,878 He's disgusting. 332 00:12:41,962 --> 00:12:43,129 What's this? 333 00:12:43,213 --> 00:12:44,380 Creepy art she's making 334 00:12:44,464 --> 00:12:45,590 'cause her boyfriend dumped her. 335 00:12:45,674 --> 00:12:47,383 I'm expressing myself creatively. 336 00:12:47,467 --> 00:12:49,260 You're counting underarm hair with a mirror. 337 00:12:49,344 --> 00:12:50,511 Check it out, four new ones. 338 00:12:50,595 --> 00:12:51,721 Get off of me! 339 00:12:51,805 --> 00:12:52,763 Who are you texting, Debs? 340 00:12:52,847 --> 00:12:53,848 Her boyfriend. 341 00:12:53,932 --> 00:12:54,891 Shut up, Carl. 342 00:12:54,975 --> 00:12:57,059 Why do guys care so much about sex? 343 00:12:57,143 --> 00:12:58,519 Because it feels awesome. 344 00:12:58,603 --> 00:12:59,520 Like you would know. 345 00:12:59,604 --> 00:13:01,564 If my hand is anything like the real thing, 346 00:13:01,648 --> 00:13:02,732 it's off the chain. 347 00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:03,733 Shut up, zit head. 348 00:13:03,817 --> 00:13:05,902 At least I got zits, no-pubes girl. 349 00:13:05,986 --> 00:13:07,028 Okay, enough. 350 00:13:07,112 --> 00:13:08,654 I plan to bang as many chicks as I can 351 00:13:08,738 --> 00:13:10,698 and get so good at it they even pay me to do it. 352 00:13:10,782 --> 00:13:13,326 Ha, yeah right. You're in a wheelchair. 353 00:13:13,410 --> 00:13:14,577 Chicks dig wheelchairs. 354 00:13:14,661 --> 00:13:16,996 I swear to God, if you lose your virginity before I do, 355 00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:20,000 I'll stab you to death in your sleep. 356 00:13:21,543 --> 00:13:22,960 We should go talk to him. 357 00:13:23,044 --> 00:13:26,088 You don't tell me to go. I tell you to go. 358 00:13:26,172 --> 00:13:28,800 Let's go. 359 00:13:30,510 --> 00:13:34,388 Liam, you don't need a COVID girlfriend. 360 00:13:34,472 --> 00:13:36,098 You don't even need a girlfriend. 361 00:13:36,182 --> 00:13:38,517 They're complicated. 362 00:13:38,601 --> 00:13:40,645 Shit. 363 00:13:40,729 --> 00:13:41,896 Gallagher! 364 00:13:41,980 --> 00:13:44,440 What are you doing here? 365 00:13:44,524 --> 00:13:46,442 Let me go. 366 00:13:46,526 --> 00:13:48,569 - Are you law enforcement? - Friend. 367 00:13:48,653 --> 00:13:49,862 Let me go, Kelly. 368 00:13:49,946 --> 00:13:51,489 Oh, you're Kelly? 369 00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:56,285 Now that's a woman. 370 00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:57,286 So what do you wanna do? 371 00:13:57,370 --> 00:13:59,038 I can get my hands on some firecrackers. 372 00:13:59,122 --> 00:14:00,498 - Cool. - It's fake. 373 00:14:00,582 --> 00:14:02,208 - Looks real! - Empty the register! 374 00:14:02,292 --> 00:14:04,293 Yeah, I'm just gonna hand over my money 375 00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:06,045 to the Lollipop Guild. 376 00:14:06,129 --> 00:14:07,797 Whoa, shit! 377 00:14:07,881 --> 00:14:09,215 You said it was fake! 378 00:14:09,299 --> 00:14:11,467 Hey, what's shaking, cupcake? 379 00:14:11,551 --> 00:14:13,427 Ew, what's that stink? 380 00:14:13,511 --> 00:14:15,513 Smells like animal butt and fireplace. 381 00:14:15,597 --> 00:14:16,931 Hey girl, I'm Carl. 382 00:14:17,015 --> 00:14:19,350 I'll just call you my angel. 383 00:14:19,434 --> 00:14:21,394 That, ladies? That's the smell of a real man. 384 00:14:21,478 --> 00:14:23,604 I always got room for my number one boo thang. 385 00:14:23,688 --> 00:14:25,147 Do you have a straight-up brain injury? 386 00:14:25,231 --> 00:14:26,565 You can ride my joint if you want. 387 00:14:26,649 --> 00:14:28,484 Go away, Muppet. 388 00:14:28,568 --> 00:14:30,195 But I'm a cripple. 389 00:14:37,077 --> 00:14:39,120 Grab those cupcakes and get chocolate milk. 390 00:14:39,204 --> 00:14:42,498 - How many cartons? - As much as you can carry. 391 00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:44,292 You're fun, you know that? 392 00:14:44,376 --> 00:14:45,835 Yeah, you too. 393 00:14:48,630 --> 00:14:52,633 You're an officer and a gentleman, Carl Gallagher. 394 00:14:52,717 --> 00:14:54,969 Only decent thing is your brother. 395 00:14:55,053 --> 00:14:56,721 Next. 396 00:14:56,805 --> 00:14:58,806 We call him Carl-lingus. 397 00:14:58,890 --> 00:15:00,933 I'm going back for seconds. 398 00:15:01,017 --> 00:15:03,436 - Are you a virgin? - Hell no. 399 00:15:03,520 --> 00:15:04,895 - I am. - Yeah, me too. 400 00:15:04,979 --> 00:15:07,857 I was thinking maybe you and me... 401 00:15:07,941 --> 00:15:10,359 - 48 condoms? - In 32 hours. 402 00:15:10,443 --> 00:15:11,902 You up for the challenge, Gallagher? 403 00:15:11,986 --> 00:15:13,362 Uh, yeah. 404 00:15:13,446 --> 00:15:15,072 Then prove it, pussy. 405 00:15:15,156 --> 00:15:17,617 - 30 seconds or less? - No problem. 406 00:15:18,576 --> 00:15:20,161 What the hell? 407 00:15:20,245 --> 00:15:22,163 How stupid do you think I am, Carl? 408 00:15:22,247 --> 00:15:24,498 No, no! 409 00:15:24,582 --> 00:15:27,084 You lying piece of shit! 410 00:15:27,168 --> 00:15:28,419 Ow, ow, ow. 411 00:15:28,503 --> 00:15:30,504 Getting your ass kicked by a girl again, Carl? 412 00:15:30,588 --> 00:15:32,715 - Is Dom here? - Nope. 413 00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:33,758 Wh... she's right there. 414 00:15:33,842 --> 00:15:35,009 Dad found out that I was skipping 415 00:15:35,093 --> 00:15:36,469 softball camp to hang out with you. 416 00:15:36,553 --> 00:15:38,012 He'll kill you if he finds you here. 417 00:15:38,096 --> 00:15:39,722 He only has one working limb. 418 00:15:39,806 --> 00:15:42,433 That doesn't scare me. 419 00:15:42,517 --> 00:15:44,894 I'ma give you a ten-second head start. 420 00:15:44,978 --> 00:15:46,228 You better run, boy. 421 00:15:46,312 --> 00:15:48,064 Go! Ten, nine... 422 00:15:48,148 --> 00:15:49,690 I won't stop seeing you! 423 00:15:49,774 --> 00:15:51,442 - Dom, I won't stop seeing you! - Eight. 424 00:15:51,526 --> 00:15:52,443 I always go down on you, 425 00:15:52,527 --> 00:15:53,944 but you don't ever go down on me. 426 00:15:54,028 --> 00:15:55,863 Your thing has all this extra skin, 427 00:15:55,947 --> 00:15:56,906 and it kinda freaks me out. 428 00:15:56,990 --> 00:15:58,449 I can do it, but I don't recommend it. 429 00:15:58,533 --> 00:16:00,284 I'd suggest you find another girl. 430 00:16:00,368 --> 00:16:01,327 I don't want another girl. 431 00:16:01,411 --> 00:16:03,704 I cut the tip of my dick off for you. 432 00:16:03,788 --> 00:16:04,872 Carl, meet shithead. 433 00:16:04,956 --> 00:16:06,499 Carl, the dude who trimmed his dick? 434 00:16:06,583 --> 00:16:08,751 - You're not circumcised? - Hell no. 435 00:16:08,835 --> 00:16:10,419 I don't mind it anymore. 436 00:16:10,503 --> 00:16:12,671 You know she's got gonorrhea, right? 437 00:16:12,755 --> 00:16:14,548 No one is ever gonna love you 438 00:16:14,632 --> 00:16:16,634 as hard as I do, Carl Gallagher, no one. 439 00:16:16,718 --> 00:16:18,969 - Is that your blood? - Yeah, it's your blood now. 440 00:16:19,053 --> 00:16:21,305 You possess me, and vice versa. 441 00:16:21,389 --> 00:16:23,307 Here, come here. 442 00:16:23,391 --> 00:16:25,267 I'll try not to nick an artery. 443 00:16:25,351 --> 00:16:27,729 Kas, where you at? 444 00:16:31,065 --> 00:16:33,651 Kas. 445 00:16:36,196 --> 00:16:37,655 You really do love me. 446 00:16:39,908 --> 00:16:42,660 I will never be okay with being away from you, bae! 447 00:16:42,744 --> 00:16:44,496 Never! 448 00:16:46,831 --> 00:16:48,082 Carl! 449 00:16:48,166 --> 00:16:50,000 Carl, get off the bus! 450 00:16:50,084 --> 00:16:51,460 Get off the bus, Carl! 451 00:16:51,544 --> 00:16:54,422 Carl! Carl, come back! 452 00:16:54,506 --> 00:16:56,048 I love you! 453 00:16:56,132 --> 00:16:58,926 Only two more days until the end of school. 454 00:16:59,010 --> 00:17:01,262 Mrs. Gallagher's waiting for you. 455 00:17:01,346 --> 00:17:03,681 I'm doing my Kegels. 456 00:17:03,765 --> 00:17:05,141 I love you! 457 00:17:05,225 --> 00:17:06,600 She's still at it. 458 00:17:06,684 --> 00:17:07,977 Carl, Carl, he's my man! 459 00:17:08,061 --> 00:17:10,479 If he can't fuck me, no one can! 460 00:17:10,563 --> 00:17:11,939 What are you doing? 461 00:17:12,023 --> 00:17:14,150 My friend Janice said this is what you do 462 00:17:14,234 --> 00:17:15,276 when a condom breaks. 463 00:17:15,360 --> 00:17:19,572 Plan B, aisle two. Monistat, aisle three. 464 00:17:19,656 --> 00:17:21,699 So are you done being a pussy 465 00:17:21,783 --> 00:17:24,952 and ready to get back to being the man that I love? 466 00:17:25,036 --> 00:17:26,704 What? 467 00:17:26,788 --> 00:17:28,289 Damn, you're dense. 468 00:17:28,373 --> 00:17:32,042 Carl Francis Hashish Gallagher. 469 00:17:32,126 --> 00:17:34,253 Yo, Gallagher! 470 00:17:34,337 --> 00:17:35,546 You're a disgrace, Gallagher. 471 00:17:35,630 --> 00:17:36,839 I never want to see your face again, 472 00:17:36,923 --> 00:17:39,592 not on my campus and not ever in my army. 473 00:17:39,676 --> 00:17:43,345 Yeah, baby! Yeah! 474 00:17:43,429 --> 00:17:45,097 Carl, let's go. 475 00:17:45,181 --> 00:17:48,560 Fuck the tent. We're having sex in my room. 476 00:17:52,689 --> 00:17:54,899 Carl! 477 00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:57,568 I better go. 478 00:17:57,652 --> 00:17:59,487 Yeah, I guess you better. 479 00:17:59,571 --> 00:18:01,822 If she's not gonna date you because of your last name, 480 00:18:01,906 --> 00:18:03,574 just find someone else who will. 481 00:18:03,658 --> 00:18:05,242 I don't want just someone. 482 00:18:05,326 --> 00:18:06,744 Yeah, well, you don't wanna be lonely. 483 00:18:06,828 --> 00:18:08,496 Just find someone who makes you laugh. 484 00:18:08,580 --> 00:18:09,705 Or who's easy. 485 00:18:09,789 --> 00:18:10,706 No. 486 00:18:10,790 --> 00:18:13,751 Find someone who appreciates you for you. 487 00:18:13,835 --> 00:18:15,669 I mean, I've been in, like, ten relationships, 488 00:18:15,753 --> 00:18:18,464 and they've all been with wonderful people. 489 00:18:18,548 --> 00:18:21,509 Does this make you... cray? 490 00:18:21,593 --> 00:18:22,510 Uh-um... 491 00:18:22,594 --> 00:18:23,928 I really like him, and I think it's time 492 00:18:24,012 --> 00:18:25,429 we take it to the next level. 493 00:18:25,513 --> 00:18:26,931 Mm, how old are you now? 494 00:18:27,015 --> 00:18:27,765 Thirteen. 495 00:18:27,849 --> 00:18:29,141 What took you so long? 496 00:18:29,225 --> 00:18:30,893 Ha, this is why I came to you. 497 00:18:30,977 --> 00:18:32,520 Little Hank? What does he like? 498 00:18:32,604 --> 00:18:34,438 I don't know, stuff. Why? 499 00:18:34,522 --> 00:18:35,648 He doesn't even notice me. 500 00:18:35,732 --> 00:18:37,316 Are you sure you're sending strong enough signals? 501 00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:38,234 I've tried. 502 00:18:38,318 --> 00:18:40,027 - Hi. - Hi. 503 00:18:40,111 --> 00:18:41,445 Guys are pretty dumb. 504 00:18:41,529 --> 00:18:43,447 Sometimes you have to put something shiny in the window 505 00:18:43,531 --> 00:18:44,406 to get 'em in the store. 506 00:18:44,490 --> 00:18:45,324 What are you doing? 507 00:18:45,408 --> 00:18:46,867 I'm sending stronger signals. 508 00:18:46,951 --> 00:18:48,911 - There. - This will get his attention. 509 00:18:48,995 --> 00:18:50,246 Who's your friend? 510 00:18:50,330 --> 00:18:51,705 Think I may become a nun. 511 00:18:51,789 --> 00:18:53,624 Nuns don't have sex, right? 512 00:18:53,708 --> 00:18:55,460 You look too pretty to be a nun. 513 00:18:57,378 --> 00:18:58,629 What do you actually do? 514 00:18:58,713 --> 00:18:59,922 I mean, I've seen porn, 515 00:19:00,006 --> 00:19:02,049 but I'm not sure I understand all the technicalities. 516 00:19:02,133 --> 00:19:04,468 Show me your seductions face. 517 00:19:04,552 --> 00:19:06,011 What are you doing wearing my top? 518 00:19:06,095 --> 00:19:07,721 Pheromones. I'm borrowing them. 519 00:19:07,805 --> 00:19:08,597 Pheromones? 520 00:19:08,681 --> 00:19:10,432 It's the thing boys like about you. 521 00:19:10,516 --> 00:19:12,268 - You mean tits? - Holy shit. 522 00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:14,103 He is man. You try seductions face. 523 00:19:14,187 --> 00:19:15,604 What the hell are you doing? 524 00:19:15,688 --> 00:19:17,106 Five minutes ago, you were a baby. 525 00:19:17,190 --> 00:19:18,524 But she looks good, yes? 526 00:19:18,608 --> 00:19:20,276 Agh! I'm not answering that. 527 00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:21,569 This means yes. 528 00:19:24,572 --> 00:19:25,948 - Where are you going? - Out. 529 00:19:26,032 --> 00:19:27,992 Are those my boots? 530 00:19:30,578 --> 00:19:31,412 Are you okay? 531 00:19:31,496 --> 00:19:34,415 No, I gotta lie down. 532 00:19:34,499 --> 00:19:36,250 Matty accused me of raping him. 533 00:19:36,334 --> 00:19:37,126 - What? - I know! 534 00:19:37,210 --> 00:19:38,294 You date raped me. 535 00:19:38,378 --> 00:19:39,420 We were on a date? 536 00:19:39,504 --> 00:19:42,339 No, Debbie, you statutory raped yourself. 537 00:19:42,423 --> 00:19:44,967 He was drunk, but his thing wasn't. 538 00:19:45,051 --> 00:19:46,051 I don't understand. 539 00:19:46,135 --> 00:19:47,428 Friends don't rape friends. 540 00:19:47,512 --> 00:19:49,930 Listen, Debs, a million guys would kill 541 00:19:50,014 --> 00:19:51,098 to be raped by you. 542 00:19:51,182 --> 00:19:54,143 Ugh, would you shut up already? 543 00:19:54,977 --> 00:19:57,187 - This is my house. - Okay. 544 00:19:57,271 --> 00:19:58,731 She's putting all that skank makeup on 545 00:19:58,815 --> 00:20:00,566 to get out of the friend zone with that Derek dude. 546 00:20:00,650 --> 00:20:01,900 We're not in the friend zone. 547 00:20:01,984 --> 00:20:03,193 - Talk to you later? - Yeah. 548 00:20:03,277 --> 00:20:05,988 If he punches your arm, it means you guys are friends. 549 00:20:06,072 --> 00:20:06,989 What the hell is going on? 550 00:20:07,073 --> 00:20:08,574 I don't want you as my friend. 551 00:20:08,658 --> 00:20:10,117 I want you as my boyfriend. 552 00:20:10,201 --> 00:20:12,369 Look at me, I'm nice, funny, smart, 553 00:20:12,453 --> 00:20:13,954 and I'd fuck up anyone that hurts you. 554 00:20:14,038 --> 00:20:15,748 I'm sick of having to change who I am 555 00:20:15,832 --> 00:20:16,915 or wait till I'm older. 556 00:20:16,999 --> 00:20:18,125 I'd be a great girlfriend, 557 00:20:18,209 --> 00:20:21,503 and if you can't see that, screw you! 558 00:20:21,587 --> 00:20:23,213 - I like you too. - You do? 559 00:20:23,297 --> 00:20:27,551 I am a woman! 560 00:20:27,635 --> 00:20:29,053 - Debbie. - Larry? 561 00:20:29,137 --> 00:20:30,471 - I'm here with Scarlet. - Hi. 562 00:20:30,555 --> 00:20:32,806 - Both of us are pregnant. - I'm into pregnant girls. 563 00:20:32,890 --> 00:20:34,308 You are my only seven-monther. 564 00:20:34,392 --> 00:20:36,477 Oh, my God. 565 00:20:36,561 --> 00:20:37,645 - Whoa! - Oh! 566 00:20:37,729 --> 00:20:38,771 Oh, I'm sorry. 567 00:20:38,855 --> 00:20:40,022 So let me get this straight. 568 00:20:40,106 --> 00:20:41,106 You have your own place, 569 00:20:41,190 --> 00:20:43,067 your own money, and nobody to take care of you. 570 00:20:43,151 --> 00:20:44,735 Excuse me, are you lactating? 571 00:20:44,819 --> 00:20:46,654 He can't help it. He has brain damage. 572 00:20:46,738 --> 00:20:48,113 Ah, your breath smells like Pop-Tarts. 573 00:20:48,197 --> 00:20:50,366 You have a good ass; It makes up for your small tits. 574 00:20:50,450 --> 00:20:51,867 - Cute baby. - No, it's not. 575 00:20:51,951 --> 00:20:54,078 I love you, Debbie. 576 00:20:55,705 --> 00:20:58,040 - I love you too. - Yeah? 577 00:21:00,585 --> 00:21:02,419 Fuck yeah! 578 00:21:02,503 --> 00:21:04,672 Neil, what is it? 579 00:21:04,756 --> 00:21:06,757 Can you come home and give me a sponge bath? 580 00:21:06,841 --> 00:21:08,217 - No. - I'll do it. 581 00:21:08,301 --> 00:21:09,176 Hey, guys. 582 00:21:09,260 --> 00:21:11,053 Came home early to spend some quality time. 583 00:21:11,137 --> 00:21:12,888 - Um... - It's over, Debbie. 584 00:21:12,972 --> 00:21:15,391 I'm in love with my nurse, and you're a horrible person. 585 00:21:17,310 --> 00:21:19,771 - Hey. - Hey. 586 00:21:21,022 --> 00:21:22,231 I think I might be gay. 587 00:21:22,315 --> 00:21:23,649 Have you had sex with another woman? 588 00:21:23,733 --> 00:21:25,651 I did once, a woman I was babysitting for. 589 00:21:25,735 --> 00:21:26,568 Oh, Debbie. 590 00:21:26,652 --> 00:21:28,362 Carl, hey. Um, I need some help. 591 00:21:28,446 --> 00:21:29,697 Got any tips on gay sex? 592 00:21:29,781 --> 00:21:31,448 Do the shocker. I'll text you a pic. 593 00:21:31,532 --> 00:21:33,325 No, no, no, Debbie. Oh... ah! 594 00:21:33,409 --> 00:21:34,410 Oh-oh! Deb-Debbie. 595 00:21:34,494 --> 00:21:35,452 Oh, my God, you're so cute. 596 00:21:35,536 --> 00:21:36,745 Have you been with a girl since? 597 00:21:36,829 --> 00:21:38,664 Yep, I just made out with one in a bathroom. 598 00:21:38,748 --> 00:21:39,665 Well, that's a start. 599 00:21:39,749 --> 00:21:41,291 I don't like talking about my feelings. 600 00:21:41,375 --> 00:21:43,627 It's called lesbianism, Debbie. 601 00:21:43,711 --> 00:21:44,753 It's what we do. 602 00:21:44,837 --> 00:21:46,797 I thought sex with women is what lesbians do. 603 00:21:46,881 --> 00:21:49,133 Yeah, and you're bad at that too. 604 00:21:50,551 --> 00:21:52,720 How did you guys know that you were lesbians? 605 00:21:52,804 --> 00:21:54,346 You either like girls or you don't. 606 00:21:54,430 --> 00:21:55,848 - I thought I did. - Look at me. 607 00:21:55,932 --> 00:21:56,933 Oh, here we go. 608 00:22:06,025 --> 00:22:08,569 You like that? 609 00:22:08,653 --> 00:22:10,654 That's all the lesbian you need to be. 610 00:22:10,738 --> 00:22:13,490 I met this awesome woman last night at a hotel bar. 611 00:22:13,574 --> 00:22:15,743 She's older than me, but not in a rapey way. 612 00:22:15,827 --> 00:22:16,994 What are you here for? 613 00:22:17,078 --> 00:22:21,039 I was hoping to have a good conversation with a nice woman. 614 00:22:21,123 --> 00:22:23,208 Looks like I hit the jackpot. 615 00:22:23,292 --> 00:22:25,794 She's got this beautiful smile and these bright eyes, 616 00:22:25,878 --> 00:22:28,547 and these sexy little Lisa Loeb glasses. 617 00:22:28,631 --> 00:22:29,798 - Debs. - So anyways, 618 00:22:29,882 --> 00:22:31,967 we spent the night together last night, 619 00:22:32,051 --> 00:22:34,636 and then she gave me this. 620 00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:35,512 Holy shit. 621 00:22:35,596 --> 00:22:37,473 - Did you find it? - Yeah! 622 00:22:37,557 --> 00:22:38,932 She thinks you're a prostitute. 623 00:22:39,016 --> 00:22:39,892 What? 624 00:22:39,976 --> 00:22:41,268 Can you pick Julia up after school? 625 00:22:41,352 --> 00:22:42,561 - Julia? - My kid. 626 00:22:42,645 --> 00:22:44,104 Did I not tell you about her? 627 00:22:44,188 --> 00:22:46,398 You've really drunk my mom's Kool-Aid, haven't you? 628 00:22:46,482 --> 00:22:49,026 Is that a sex thing? 'Cause probably. 629 00:22:49,110 --> 00:22:51,445 You're doing the mom and the daughter? 630 00:22:51,529 --> 00:22:53,739 - That's hot. - It's going south fast. 631 00:22:53,823 --> 00:22:55,115 So Debbie and I are fucking. 632 00:22:55,199 --> 00:22:56,617 Excuse me? 633 00:22:56,701 --> 00:22:58,160 No screens for a week. 634 00:22:58,244 --> 00:22:59,953 We have an arrest warrant for Deborah Gallagher. 635 00:23:00,037 --> 00:23:01,330 No shit. What for? 636 00:23:01,414 --> 00:23:04,541 Statutory rape of a minor, Julia Nicolo. 637 00:23:04,625 --> 00:23:06,084 Fuck. 638 00:23:06,168 --> 00:23:07,961 We got a runner! 639 00:23:08,045 --> 00:23:10,547 - What's going on? - When's your 18th birthday? 640 00:23:10,631 --> 00:23:12,842 Stop! Police! 641 00:23:13,801 --> 00:23:15,219 I can kinda understand 642 00:23:15,303 --> 00:23:16,762 why Sasha wouldn't wanna be with me. 643 00:23:16,846 --> 00:23:18,972 Sorry, buddy, it's the family you were born into. 644 00:23:19,056 --> 00:23:20,641 Just gotta embrace it. 645 00:23:20,725 --> 00:23:24,978 Why am I the only one in the family that has black skin? 646 00:23:25,062 --> 00:23:27,147 Liam, ah! 647 00:23:27,231 --> 00:23:29,316 It has something to do with Monica's granddad, 648 00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:31,902 although we never really got a straight answer. 649 00:23:31,986 --> 00:23:34,363 Hey, Frank, do you know who banged a Black person 650 00:23:34,447 --> 00:23:35,447 in our family lineage? 651 00:23:35,531 --> 00:23:37,241 This is your great-great aunt. 652 00:23:37,325 --> 00:23:40,410 Someone from your mother's grandfather's side 653 00:23:40,494 --> 00:23:42,204 of the family had a mistress. 654 00:23:42,288 --> 00:23:44,331 Twice removed on your third cousin's... 655 00:23:44,415 --> 00:23:46,708 Well, look, I'm not exactly sure what the genealogy is. 656 00:23:46,792 --> 00:23:48,836 - And she was Black? - She is Black. 657 00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:51,380 - Is she still alive? - Lives down the street. 658 00:23:51,464 --> 00:23:53,173 Why didn't you tell me? 659 00:23:53,257 --> 00:23:54,883 Get away from the house, Frank. 660 00:23:54,967 --> 00:23:56,468 You know the rules. 661 00:23:56,552 --> 00:23:58,512 Baby come on give me, won't you give me 662 00:23:58,596 --> 00:23:59,471 That's why, son. 663 00:23:59,555 --> 00:24:01,139 What's going on? 664 00:24:01,223 --> 00:24:03,016 Trying to figure out who I am. 665 00:24:03,100 --> 00:24:04,393 What's my identity. 666 00:24:04,477 --> 00:24:06,103 Dr. King, Dr. Dre? 667 00:24:06,187 --> 00:24:08,188 Maybe you should set your sights lower, 668 00:24:08,272 --> 00:24:09,982 you know, like Tyga, Nelly, 669 00:24:10,066 --> 00:24:11,733 or maybe one of the Wayans brothers, 670 00:24:11,817 --> 00:24:12,902 or Lester Holt. 671 00:24:15,071 --> 00:24:16,113 Can you dig it 672 00:24:16,197 --> 00:24:19,700 I, I, I 673 00:24:19,784 --> 00:24:21,577 Can you dig it 674 00:24:21,661 --> 00:24:25,163 I, I, I 675 00:24:25,247 --> 00:24:27,124 Can you dig it 676 00:24:27,208 --> 00:24:28,750 I, I, I 677 00:24:28,834 --> 00:24:30,377 I just want to know who I am. 678 00:24:30,461 --> 00:24:32,004 You're a Gallagher, same as me. 679 00:24:32,088 --> 00:24:33,338 You just gotta embrace it. 680 00:24:33,422 --> 00:24:35,007 I hate to agree with Debbie, 681 00:24:35,091 --> 00:24:36,008 but she's right. 682 00:24:36,092 --> 00:24:38,468 Uh, sorry, one more time for the people in the back. 683 00:24:38,552 --> 00:24:41,472 Just be a Gallagher. 684 00:24:42,515 --> 00:24:44,308 Be a Gallagher. 685 00:24:46,352 --> 00:24:48,520 Get everything you can. 686 00:24:48,604 --> 00:24:51,648 Raggedy looking stuff. These are great. 687 00:24:51,732 --> 00:24:53,692 Gotta put it on the line 688 00:24:53,776 --> 00:24:56,278 Don't let the death of an orphaned African child 689 00:24:56,362 --> 00:24:59,364 be on your conscience this holiday season. 690 00:24:59,448 --> 00:25:00,908 He has AIDS. 691 00:25:00,992 --> 00:25:03,702 Please, give money. 692 00:25:03,786 --> 00:25:04,953 Keep shivering, that's really great. 693 00:25:05,037 --> 00:25:07,831 - Here, that's all I got, man. - God bless you. 694 00:25:07,915 --> 00:25:09,166 Jesus loves you. 695 00:25:09,250 --> 00:25:11,293 Fuck you, Frank. 696 00:25:11,377 --> 00:25:12,794 Do your thing, hey 697 00:25:12,878 --> 00:25:14,296 Baby, just a taste. 698 00:25:14,380 --> 00:25:16,423 Do your thing yeah 699 00:25:16,507 --> 00:25:17,841 Do your thing 700 00:25:17,925 --> 00:25:20,302 Don't give up, do your thing 701 00:25:21,220 --> 00:25:24,264 It's not working. I'm sorry, man. 702 00:25:24,348 --> 00:25:25,557 Fucking meds. 703 00:25:25,641 --> 00:25:28,978 Could also be the toddler staring at us from the corner. 704 00:25:29,895 --> 00:25:31,229 Can you take Liam to Head Start on your way? 705 00:25:31,313 --> 00:25:33,690 Like I've done every day for the last four months? 706 00:25:33,774 --> 00:25:35,400 Yes, I think I can handle that. 707 00:25:35,484 --> 00:25:36,861 Come on, Liam! 708 00:25:39,113 --> 00:25:41,740 No, no, no. No weapons in juvie. 709 00:25:41,824 --> 00:25:42,783 Where's Debbie? 710 00:25:42,867 --> 00:25:45,452 Said something about going out to buy drugs. 711 00:25:45,536 --> 00:25:46,578 You couldn't stop her? 712 00:25:46,662 --> 00:25:47,788 I'm injured. 713 00:25:47,872 --> 00:25:49,206 Boom, boom, boom. 714 00:25:49,290 --> 00:25:51,416 That's right, my little eggplant. 715 00:25:51,500 --> 00:25:53,168 Boom, boom, boom. 716 00:25:53,252 --> 00:25:55,420 - Aw, fuck. - What? 717 00:25:55,504 --> 00:25:56,755 She's dead. 718 00:25:56,839 --> 00:25:58,590 Isn't it past his bedtime? 719 00:25:58,674 --> 00:26:00,968 - Liam, no, don't look! - Little late for that. 720 00:26:01,052 --> 00:26:03,553 Look, put the kid to bed, come back, we'll deal with this. 721 00:26:03,637 --> 00:26:06,139 Come on, Debbie, go. 722 00:26:06,223 --> 00:26:07,391 Night, buddy. 723 00:26:07,808 --> 00:26:10,936 That girl Stella in there is trying to hook up with me. 724 00:26:11,020 --> 00:26:13,647 Cool. Lucky you. 725 00:26:13,731 --> 00:26:15,524 What do I do? 726 00:26:16,233 --> 00:26:18,193 Take her up to your room. Dim the lights. 727 00:26:18,277 --> 00:26:19,736 Strike a manly pose. 728 00:26:19,820 --> 00:26:22,447 Put on some sexy music, like Barry White. 729 00:26:22,531 --> 00:26:23,699 Do your thing 730 00:26:23,783 --> 00:26:27,161 Son... what say we pick up some hos? 731 00:26:29,080 --> 00:26:32,290 Your share of the bills this month, $70. 732 00:26:32,374 --> 00:26:34,084 I don't have $70. 733 00:26:34,168 --> 00:26:35,544 Then make $70. 734 00:26:35,628 --> 00:26:38,547 - I'm nine. - Figure it out. 735 00:26:38,631 --> 00:26:39,965 I hereby appoint you 736 00:26:40,049 --> 00:26:43,427 the Gallagher Special Diplomatic Envoy to Nigeria. 737 00:26:43,511 --> 00:26:45,846 Your first duty: Help me sell a baby. 738 00:26:45,930 --> 00:26:48,598 Hot Gay Jesus. 739 00:26:48,682 --> 00:26:51,184 Bet we can make money off of that. 740 00:26:51,268 --> 00:26:52,227 How? 741 00:26:52,311 --> 00:26:54,646 Ring the right bell for the right causes, 742 00:26:54,730 --> 00:26:56,898 the guilt-ridden pry open their wallets. 743 00:26:56,982 --> 00:26:58,233 It's Pavlovian. 744 00:26:58,317 --> 00:26:59,276 Don't miss out. 745 00:26:59,360 --> 00:27:01,403 All profits go to help gays across the planet. 746 00:27:01,487 --> 00:27:03,822 Are we really gonna give all of our money to Ian? 747 00:27:03,906 --> 00:27:06,575 No, of course not. Thank you so much for waiting. 748 00:27:06,659 --> 00:27:08,660 Gay Jesus loves you and blesses you. 749 00:27:08,744 --> 00:27:10,537 Time to expand our business, son. 750 00:27:10,621 --> 00:27:12,247 Let's get 'em loaded in. Welcome. 751 00:27:12,331 --> 00:27:14,541 We have a 16-hour journey ahead of us. 752 00:27:14,625 --> 00:27:15,542 I'll help you. 753 00:27:15,626 --> 00:27:17,127 We'll play a little get-to-know-you game 754 00:27:17,211 --> 00:27:19,796 as soon as you're comfortably settled in. 755 00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:21,548 Boom. 756 00:27:21,632 --> 00:27:24,051 Step right up and help build a border wall. 757 00:27:24,135 --> 00:27:25,135 A buck a brick. 758 00:27:25,219 --> 00:27:27,804 Keep illegals out of the South Side. 759 00:27:27,888 --> 00:27:28,847 Thank you. 760 00:27:28,931 --> 00:27:30,766 Thanks for making America great again. 761 00:27:30,850 --> 00:27:32,517 Thank you. 762 00:27:32,601 --> 00:27:33,894 I wanna go to school, Frank. 763 00:27:33,978 --> 00:27:36,146 Well, people in hell want cold beer. 764 00:27:36,230 --> 00:27:37,147 What's in it for me? 765 00:27:37,231 --> 00:27:38,815 I'll call Child Services. 766 00:27:38,899 --> 00:27:42,152 You're my father. You've abandoned me. 767 00:27:42,236 --> 00:27:43,278 Well played, son, 768 00:27:43,362 --> 00:27:46,448 but I'm re-abandoning you right after this is done. 769 00:27:46,532 --> 00:27:47,699 I hate Gallaghers. 770 00:27:47,783 --> 00:27:51,161 You motherfuckers bring out the worst in everybody. 771 00:27:51,245 --> 00:27:52,287 What, you proud of that? 772 00:27:52,371 --> 00:27:54,832 Hey, man, I know who I am. 773 00:27:59,503 --> 00:28:01,797 Be a Gallagher. 774 00:28:01,881 --> 00:28:03,381 I think I can do that. 775 00:28:03,465 --> 00:28:05,300 Thank you. This actually helped. 776 00:28:05,384 --> 00:28:07,135 I'm glad we could have this talk. 777 00:28:07,219 --> 00:28:09,179 I can take it from here. 778 00:28:09,263 --> 00:28:11,973 Ah, I'm killing this shit. 779 00:28:12,057 --> 00:28:15,144 He's lucky to have me. 780 00:28:22,526 --> 00:28:24,152 - Is that my gun? - Yeah. 781 00:28:24,236 --> 00:28:25,821 Is that Franny's Cabbage Patch? 782 00:28:25,905 --> 00:28:27,030 Yeah. 783 00:28:27,114 --> 00:28:30,534 You mind taking a picture of me? 784 00:28:31,410 --> 00:28:32,494 What are you doing? 785 00:28:32,578 --> 00:28:34,329 Taking your advice on how to land a girlfriend. 786 00:28:34,413 --> 00:28:36,289 Being a Gallagher, leaning into it. 787 00:28:36,373 --> 00:28:39,000 - Leaning into what? - Being a teen mom. 788 00:28:44,590 --> 00:28:47,551 Oh, shit. 789 00:28:47,635 --> 00:28:49,386 Oh, shit. 790 00:28:51,388 --> 00:28:53,140 Oh, fuck! 791 00:28:53,224 --> 00:28:55,559 Sorry. 792 00:28:55,643 --> 00:28:56,893 Don't embarrass me like that. 793 00:28:56,977 --> 00:29:00,021 You can't have a boy in your bed. 794 00:29:00,105 --> 00:29:01,148 Why not? You do. 795 00:29:01,232 --> 00:29:03,191 - I'm a grown-up. - I'm pregnant. 796 00:29:03,275 --> 00:29:05,735 No, you're not. 797 00:29:05,819 --> 00:29:08,822 No, you're not. Are you sure? 798 00:29:08,906 --> 00:29:11,741 - It's positive. - So we're pregnant? 799 00:29:11,825 --> 00:29:13,702 Would you like to discuss your options going forward? 800 00:29:13,786 --> 00:29:16,914 No, no, no, thank you. We're having this baby. 801 00:29:21,126 --> 00:29:23,044 - You're not pregnant? - I'm not. 802 00:29:25,464 --> 00:29:27,132 Hi, Mrs. D. Is Derek here? 803 00:29:27,216 --> 00:29:30,135 He's moving to Florida to live with his grandmother. 804 00:29:30,219 --> 00:29:31,386 I'm sorry. 805 00:29:31,470 --> 00:29:32,512 He can't go to Florida! 806 00:29:32,596 --> 00:29:35,724 He's the father of my child! 807 00:29:36,392 --> 00:29:39,728 I'm carrying your grandchild! 808 00:29:39,812 --> 00:29:41,104 Can I help you? 809 00:29:41,188 --> 00:29:43,440 We'd like to talk to you about the baby. 810 00:29:43,524 --> 00:29:45,775 What baby? 811 00:29:45,859 --> 00:29:48,320 Derek and Debbie's baby. 812 00:29:48,404 --> 00:29:50,030 Holy shit. 813 00:29:50,114 --> 00:29:51,573 What else did I miss? 814 00:29:51,657 --> 00:29:52,949 Lay down, lay down, lay down. 815 00:29:53,033 --> 00:29:54,284 All right, I'm gonna go get my truck 816 00:29:54,368 --> 00:29:55,452 so we can go to the hospital. 817 00:29:55,536 --> 00:29:56,661 No! No hospital! 818 00:29:56,745 --> 00:29:58,371 - We don't have time to argue. - Ahhh! 819 00:29:58,455 --> 00:29:59,915 No shit, this baby is coming! 820 00:29:59,999 --> 00:30:01,708 - Now? - She's crowning. 821 00:30:01,792 --> 00:30:03,335 - Oh. - Who delivered Liam? 822 00:30:03,419 --> 00:30:05,045 Monica. She was high. 823 00:30:05,129 --> 00:30:06,171 He slid right out. 824 00:30:06,255 --> 00:30:08,048 - You worked at a nursing home. - Changing bedpans. 825 00:30:08,132 --> 00:30:10,842 I never delivered a damn baby. 826 00:30:10,926 --> 00:30:12,969 - It says we need towels! - Already got 'em. 827 00:30:13,053 --> 00:30:16,139 Okay, okay, so put 'em under to catch all the... 828 00:30:16,223 --> 00:30:18,225 Fuck, just put 'em under. Shit! 829 00:30:18,309 --> 00:30:19,935 You're gonna start pushing now, okay? 830 00:30:20,019 --> 00:30:21,394 - Uh-huh. - All right, here we go. 831 00:30:21,478 --> 00:30:23,438 - All right. - Ready and push! 832 00:30:23,522 --> 00:30:25,690 Push, Debbie, push. 833 00:30:27,735 --> 00:30:28,818 Eww. 834 00:30:28,902 --> 00:30:31,363 You gotta open your legs up. 835 00:30:31,447 --> 00:30:33,907 My daughter. 836 00:30:33,991 --> 00:30:35,784 She's so big. 837 00:30:35,868 --> 00:30:37,452 Hey, good morning, Franny. 838 00:30:37,536 --> 00:30:39,079 Trying to set a good example for Franny. 839 00:30:39,163 --> 00:30:41,748 When life gets tough, you smack a smile on your face 840 00:30:41,832 --> 00:30:42,582 and face the day. 841 00:30:42,666 --> 00:30:44,834 How is she so fucking perky? 842 00:30:44,918 --> 00:30:46,795 She's headed for a major crash. 843 00:30:49,923 --> 00:30:51,049 Franny still asleep? 844 00:30:51,133 --> 00:30:52,468 Quiet! 845 00:30:58,223 --> 00:30:59,307 Ah, fuck! 846 00:30:59,391 --> 00:31:00,976 Everything terrifies me: 847 00:31:01,060 --> 00:31:04,354 SIDS, jaundice, germs, reflux. 848 00:31:06,565 --> 00:31:08,150 I think the drugs are kicking in. 849 00:31:22,748 --> 00:31:26,210 I can't do it, Franny. I'm not a good mother. 850 00:31:34,218 --> 00:31:38,013 Maybe all this is a mistake 851 00:31:38,097 --> 00:31:42,309 That I can't seem to shake 852 00:31:42,393 --> 00:31:47,022 But the way we live is the way we die 853 00:31:47,106 --> 00:31:49,566 Holy shit, it costs $4,000 new. 854 00:31:49,650 --> 00:31:51,901 Yeah, that's going on Craigslist. 855 00:31:51,985 --> 00:31:53,361 We'll steal the stroller someone wants 856 00:31:53,445 --> 00:31:56,781 instead of finding someone who wants the stroller we have. 857 00:31:56,865 --> 00:31:58,700 Hi, you contacted me 858 00:31:58,784 --> 00:31:59,868 about the Baby Bugaboo? 859 00:31:59,952 --> 00:32:01,119 Yes, it's still here. 860 00:32:01,203 --> 00:32:02,412 How much did you want again? 861 00:32:02,496 --> 00:32:03,747 How about 1,500? 862 00:32:03,831 --> 00:32:04,831 You're haggling with me? 863 00:32:04,915 --> 00:32:06,041 Isn't that what Craigslist is all about? 864 00:32:06,125 --> 00:32:08,585 It's also about people advertising baby stuff 865 00:32:08,669 --> 00:32:10,545 and when the pregnant lady shows up, 866 00:32:10,629 --> 00:32:13,923 they cut the baby out of her stomach. 867 00:32:14,007 --> 00:32:15,550 We have such a bright life now. 868 00:32:15,634 --> 00:32:19,637 Double stroller. We could get a lot for that. 869 00:32:25,853 --> 00:32:27,020 Shit. 870 00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:34,152 So my two role models are either a teen mom 871 00:32:34,236 --> 00:32:35,320 or a white boy drug dealer. 872 00:32:39,032 --> 00:32:40,033 All right, I'm out. 873 00:32:40,117 --> 00:32:42,369 Off to deal drugs on a Saturday morning? 874 00:32:42,453 --> 00:32:43,495 Yep. 875 00:32:43,579 --> 00:32:44,704 Impressive work ethic, son. 876 00:32:44,788 --> 00:32:46,539 What's in those bags, Carl? 877 00:32:46,623 --> 00:32:48,291 Horse. 878 00:32:48,375 --> 00:32:50,585 Why are you taping horse to my tummy? 879 00:32:50,669 --> 00:32:53,129 'Cause I'm your uncle, and you're my niece, 880 00:32:53,213 --> 00:32:55,382 and you do what I say. 881 00:32:55,466 --> 00:32:57,551 Okay, Uncle Carl. 882 00:33:04,308 --> 00:33:05,309 Whoo 883 00:33:10,564 --> 00:33:12,649 You alone? 884 00:33:12,733 --> 00:33:14,359 Uncle Carl! 885 00:33:14,443 --> 00:33:16,069 Chicago Police, open up! 886 00:33:16,153 --> 00:33:18,113 Go, run. 887 00:33:27,706 --> 00:33:28,957 Put your hands in the air now! 888 00:33:29,041 --> 00:33:31,709 All right, don't shoot! I'm white! 889 00:33:31,793 --> 00:33:33,253 Do you regret what you've done, Carl? 890 00:33:33,337 --> 00:33:34,629 I did something really dumb, 891 00:33:34,713 --> 00:33:36,256 and I shouldn't have. 892 00:33:36,340 --> 00:33:40,093 I trusted a fucking retard with a man's job. 893 00:33:40,177 --> 00:33:41,553 Next time I move a bunch of drugs, 894 00:33:41,637 --> 00:33:43,012 I'll be smarter. 895 00:33:43,096 --> 00:33:45,265 That's not what I was hoping to hear. 896 00:33:45,349 --> 00:33:46,599 I know what you were hoping to hear. 897 00:33:46,683 --> 00:33:48,768 If Your Honor would lose 20 pounds, 898 00:33:48,852 --> 00:33:50,895 I would consider tapping that. 899 00:33:50,979 --> 00:33:52,772 I sentence you to the maximum of one year 900 00:33:52,856 --> 00:33:54,149 at the Illinois Department of Corrections 901 00:33:54,233 --> 00:33:55,775 Juvenile Justice Division. 902 00:33:55,859 --> 00:33:57,152 Yes, please. 903 00:33:57,236 --> 00:33:59,404 Why the fuck did you do that, Carl? 904 00:33:59,488 --> 00:34:02,115 My street cred will be off the chain. 905 00:34:02,199 --> 00:34:04,617 - We'll send letters. - He'll be okay. 906 00:34:04,701 --> 00:34:05,869 Hell, he's gonna be running the joint. 907 00:34:05,953 --> 00:34:07,787 Any chance he'll get scared straight? 908 00:34:07,871 --> 00:34:09,122 - No. - Hell no. 909 00:34:12,209 --> 00:34:14,169 I know what you did. Kept your mouth shut. 910 00:34:14,253 --> 00:34:17,338 Coulda gave him up, coulda made things easier for yourself. 911 00:34:17,422 --> 00:34:18,256 Word. 912 00:34:18,340 --> 00:34:20,550 - Forty-nine, fifty. - Gallagher. 913 00:34:20,634 --> 00:34:21,384 Ready to go? 914 00:34:21,468 --> 00:34:23,261 Sweat 915 00:34:23,345 --> 00:34:25,180 Work 916 00:34:25,264 --> 00:34:26,014 Sweat 917 00:34:26,098 --> 00:34:27,932 White Boy Carl! 918 00:34:28,016 --> 00:34:30,226 White Boy Carl! White Boy Carl! 919 00:34:30,310 --> 00:34:33,021 White Boy Carl! White Boy Carl! 920 00:34:33,105 --> 00:34:34,230 White Boy carl! 921 00:34:34,314 --> 00:34:35,399 Hey 922 00:34:39,611 --> 00:34:41,029 Where you want these at, Mr. Gallagher? 923 00:34:41,113 --> 00:34:42,989 Right over there with the rest of the shipment. 924 00:34:43,073 --> 00:34:44,532 What the hell is going on? 925 00:34:44,616 --> 00:34:46,618 Upgraded the crib since it's technically mine now. 926 00:34:46,702 --> 00:34:49,120 Ah, not with my name on the deed, it's not. 927 00:34:49,204 --> 00:34:50,079 My money, it is. 928 00:34:50,163 --> 00:34:51,372 Place gonna be popping. You feel me? 929 00:34:51,456 --> 00:34:55,168 Shut your mouth, shut up 930 00:34:55,252 --> 00:34:57,879 - Shut your mouth -Thug for life, homes. 931 00:34:57,963 --> 00:34:59,255 - I gotta bounce. - Bye 932 00:34:59,339 --> 00:35:00,673 You stay out front while I go in 933 00:35:00,757 --> 00:35:03,259 and offer Mr. Wu a little neighborhood protection policy. 934 00:35:03,343 --> 00:35:07,180 Who brings the fight to your door like us 935 00:35:07,264 --> 00:35:09,724 Like taking candy from an Asian dry cleaner. 936 00:35:09,808 --> 00:35:11,017 Where you getting all this money? 937 00:35:11,101 --> 00:35:12,185 Job, saved up. 938 00:35:12,269 --> 00:35:14,103 You better not be selling drugs again, Carl. 939 00:35:14,187 --> 00:35:15,230 No. 940 00:35:15,314 --> 00:35:16,564 Next. 941 00:35:16,648 --> 00:35:18,024 You know why you're here? 942 00:35:18,108 --> 00:35:19,609 I need to buy a gun. 943 00:35:19,693 --> 00:35:21,277 Glock 17. 944 00:35:21,361 --> 00:35:23,613 A mere $300. 945 00:35:23,697 --> 00:35:24,697 Walk tall. 946 00:35:24,781 --> 00:35:26,241 - Students talk. - So? 947 00:35:26,325 --> 00:35:27,450 I want a Glock. 948 00:35:27,534 --> 00:35:30,453 A nine-millimeter semi with an extended mag. 949 00:35:30,537 --> 00:35:33,039 We're talking about a Smith & Wesson Lady model. 950 00:35:33,123 --> 00:35:36,417 Pink handle would be nice. 951 00:35:36,501 --> 00:35:38,628 Gun! 952 00:35:38,712 --> 00:35:40,964 Get your hands in the air 953 00:35:41,048 --> 00:35:43,049 And say yeah 954 00:35:43,133 --> 00:35:44,217 What are you doing? 955 00:35:44,301 --> 00:35:46,427 The new-and-improved Liam, or Lil G for short. 956 00:35:46,511 --> 00:35:49,013 Are you sure you're not just leaning into Black stereotypes? 957 00:35:49,097 --> 00:35:52,141 No, I'm leaning into being a Gallagher. 958 00:35:52,225 --> 00:35:54,936 Okay, I'm going live. 959 00:35:55,937 --> 00:35:56,729 What up, what up? 960 00:35:56,813 --> 00:35:58,064 It's your boy Lil G 961 00:35:58,148 --> 00:36:00,024 coming at you live from the Gallagher house. 962 00:36:00,108 --> 00:36:02,444 Let me give you a tour. 963 00:36:04,321 --> 00:36:06,155 Is that what he really thinks of us? 964 00:36:06,239 --> 00:36:07,156 Yeah. 965 00:36:07,240 --> 00:36:09,117 We did what we had to do to survive. 966 00:36:11,036 --> 00:36:13,037 You in this game for life, motherfucker. 967 00:36:13,121 --> 00:36:14,330 I need to get out of the game. 968 00:36:14,414 --> 00:36:15,790 Can I get my old job back? 969 00:36:15,874 --> 00:36:17,501 I need money for military school. 970 00:36:19,920 --> 00:36:21,045 Oh, what the fuck? 971 00:36:21,129 --> 00:36:22,755 Shit, I got him. 972 00:36:24,049 --> 00:36:26,092 I see you found the little copper treat I left you. 973 00:36:26,176 --> 00:36:27,010 Who are you? 974 00:36:27,094 --> 00:36:28,261 I'm your worst fucking nightmare. 975 00:36:28,345 --> 00:36:30,888 You know what makes a man? Discipline. 976 00:36:30,972 --> 00:36:32,140 Conviction. 977 00:36:32,224 --> 00:36:33,391 Strength of character. 978 00:36:33,475 --> 00:36:38,021 Deciding against all odds you alone define your destiny. 979 00:36:38,105 --> 00:36:39,939 I want to be able to see my face in these 980 00:36:40,023 --> 00:36:41,524 by the end of the day. 981 00:36:41,608 --> 00:36:42,817 Well, I can lend you the money. 982 00:36:42,901 --> 00:36:44,902 No, I need to earn my own way back into school. 983 00:36:44,986 --> 00:36:46,696 I already got someone on dishes. 984 00:36:46,780 --> 00:36:48,615 I'll empty and clean the grease trap. 985 00:36:58,625 --> 00:37:01,961 Jesus, Mary and Joseph, what the fuck is that smell? 986 00:37:02,045 --> 00:37:04,130 Fuck, it's like rotten, rancid eggs. 987 00:37:04,214 --> 00:37:05,923 No time to shower. 988 00:37:06,007 --> 00:37:07,383 "Need the car to make money? 989 00:37:07,467 --> 00:37:09,969 Thanks. Carl." 990 00:37:10,053 --> 00:37:11,804 - You called for an Uber? - You Kendrick? 991 00:37:11,888 --> 00:37:13,848 - I'm Carl. Where you going? - No thank you. 992 00:37:13,932 --> 00:37:16,559 I charge ten bucks less than whatever you were gonna pay. 993 00:37:16,643 --> 00:37:18,770 Okay. 994 00:37:18,854 --> 00:37:21,606 Carl, I said no Uber. That's my car! 995 00:37:21,690 --> 00:37:25,068 You can't just take it whenever you feel like it. 996 00:37:25,736 --> 00:37:27,945 You did it, man. You're clean. 997 00:37:28,029 --> 00:37:29,030 Thank you. 998 00:37:29,114 --> 00:37:30,323 Who the hell is this? 999 00:37:30,407 --> 00:37:31,574 This is my girlfriend. 1000 00:37:31,658 --> 00:37:32,950 I was at Betty Ford three times. 1001 00:37:33,034 --> 00:37:35,244 It didn't work for me, cost a fortune. 1002 00:37:35,328 --> 00:37:36,746 You cleaned me up in five days. 1003 00:37:36,830 --> 00:37:37,830 Here. 1004 00:37:37,914 --> 00:37:39,707 That's five grand from my parents. 1005 00:37:39,791 --> 00:37:43,586 Plus, Nora-Jean's folks are gonna give you 2,500 1006 00:37:43,670 --> 00:37:46,839 for the Beaver Trap Detox Special. 1007 00:37:46,923 --> 00:37:49,967 In 72 hours, you will be free of your addiction. 1008 00:37:50,051 --> 00:37:51,928 Livestock's been fed and watered, sir. 1009 00:37:52,012 --> 00:37:54,180 Jesus, Carl, your involuntary detox program 1010 00:37:54,264 --> 00:37:55,473 is stinking up the whole house. 1011 00:37:55,557 --> 00:37:56,557 It smells like afterbirth down there. 1012 00:37:56,641 --> 00:37:58,184 I will now begin intake. 1013 00:37:58,268 --> 00:38:00,269 State your name and your parents' net worth 1014 00:38:00,353 --> 00:38:02,563 in a loud and clear voice. 1015 00:38:02,647 --> 00:38:05,525 I know you're selling vape pens to little Mexican kids, 1016 00:38:05,609 --> 00:38:07,235 and I want to go into business with you. 1017 00:38:07,319 --> 00:38:08,361 We'll split profits 50/50. 1018 00:38:08,445 --> 00:38:09,737 Liam and I will go to the playground, 1019 00:38:09,821 --> 00:38:13,116 round up new buyers, and here is your supplies. 1020 00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:14,033 Menthol? 1021 00:38:14,117 --> 00:38:16,620 Trust me, my customers will love it. 1022 00:38:18,038 --> 00:38:19,163 You can ride with me. 1023 00:38:19,247 --> 00:38:20,456 We'll get to know each other better. 1024 00:38:23,794 --> 00:38:25,002 He's running. 1025 00:38:25,086 --> 00:38:27,130 Stay in the car. 1026 00:38:28,715 --> 00:38:31,050 Hey, stop! 1027 00:38:32,135 --> 00:38:34,554 - Who the hell are you? - The law, motherfucker! 1028 00:38:34,638 --> 00:38:36,807 Don't hit your head on the way in, punk. 1029 00:38:40,519 --> 00:38:41,561 Well, I'll be damned. 1030 00:38:41,645 --> 00:38:44,480 You got any more tricks up your sleeve? 1031 00:38:44,564 --> 00:38:46,566 Thanks for the ride, Sergeant Winslow. 1032 00:38:46,650 --> 00:38:48,025 What was all that about? 1033 00:38:48,109 --> 00:38:49,527 Think I wanna be a cop. 1034 00:38:49,611 --> 00:38:51,237 I'm here to join the police academy. 1035 00:38:51,321 --> 00:38:52,947 I have three skills to offer you, sir. 1036 00:38:53,031 --> 00:38:55,241 I like to choke things, I'm good with weapons, 1037 00:38:55,325 --> 00:38:56,993 and I got a buttload of rage in my heart. 1038 00:38:57,077 --> 00:38:59,287 I think I've got a place better suited for your talent. 1039 00:38:59,371 --> 00:39:00,621 Sanitation department. 1040 00:39:00,705 --> 00:39:02,290 Breakfast is served. 1041 00:39:02,374 --> 00:39:03,958 You guys eat out of the garbage? 1042 00:39:04,042 --> 00:39:05,209 You just show up out of nowhere, 1043 00:39:05,293 --> 00:39:07,211 acting like you're too good to eat a dumpster bagel. 1044 00:39:07,295 --> 00:39:09,338 Strikes me as a little suspicious. 1045 00:39:09,422 --> 00:39:10,590 Eat. 1046 00:39:10,674 --> 00:39:12,258 Except cinnamon raisin. Those go to the boss man. 1047 00:39:12,342 --> 00:39:14,010 Suddenly magic 1048 00:39:14,094 --> 00:39:16,429 We're finishing up. 1049 00:39:16,513 --> 00:39:18,515 Move it up. 1050 00:39:19,808 --> 00:39:21,351 Come on back. 1051 00:39:24,938 --> 00:39:25,855 Fuck that guy. 1052 00:39:25,939 --> 00:39:27,190 Beautiful world 1053 00:39:28,275 --> 00:39:30,193 We ain't got no free services, you heard? 1054 00:39:30,277 --> 00:39:31,736 So give us what you owe, or we're gonna be 1055 00:39:31,820 --> 00:39:34,280 at every open house you got. 1056 00:39:34,364 --> 00:39:35,698 What's up with the open house thing? 1057 00:39:35,782 --> 00:39:38,576 You ask a lot of questions, Gallagher. 1058 00:39:38,660 --> 00:39:40,328 - You a cop, Carl? - Hell no. 1059 00:39:40,412 --> 00:39:42,288 Sir, garbage is dirty. 1060 00:39:42,372 --> 00:39:43,956 Keep it up. You're gonna make one hell 1061 00:39:44,040 --> 00:39:45,666 of a cop someday, Gallagher. 1062 00:39:45,750 --> 00:39:47,585 See, it's not all bad. 1063 00:39:47,669 --> 00:39:49,962 Yeah, well, I made something of myself. 1064 00:39:50,046 --> 00:39:52,799 How am I gonna afford $375? 1065 00:39:52,883 --> 00:39:55,134 - You could get a job. - Is The Alibi hiring? 1066 00:39:55,218 --> 00:39:56,260 I need to get a job. 1067 00:39:56,344 --> 00:39:59,013 I wanted to ask if it would be okay if I worked here. 1068 00:39:59,097 --> 00:40:02,809 That's 75 cents a pound. That will be $13.50, please. 1069 00:40:02,893 --> 00:40:03,851 You overcharged her. 1070 00:40:03,935 --> 00:40:05,353 It's 50 cents a pound. Sign's in the window. 1071 00:40:05,437 --> 00:40:06,813 I took that sign down. 1072 00:40:06,897 --> 00:40:08,189 Fifty cents a pound is low. 1073 00:40:08,273 --> 00:40:10,483 As long as it's under a dollar, nobody really does the math, 1074 00:40:10,567 --> 00:40:12,485 and we increase profits by 50%. 1075 00:40:12,569 --> 00:40:14,028 Smart. 1076 00:40:16,156 --> 00:40:18,741 That'll show those misogynistic motherfuckers. 1077 00:40:18,825 --> 00:40:21,285 Only two dicks left. 1078 00:40:21,369 --> 00:40:22,411 - En garde! - Ooh! 1079 00:40:23,663 --> 00:40:25,248 Okay, who's next? 1080 00:40:32,339 --> 00:40:35,634 - You cunt! - I tried to be nice. 1081 00:40:37,218 --> 00:40:38,261 Open the gate. 1082 00:40:38,345 --> 00:40:40,347 And good afternoon to you too, sir. 1083 00:40:52,609 --> 00:40:55,820 Who the fuck welded a dumpster to my fucking car? 1084 00:40:58,281 --> 00:41:00,617 Okay, now let's do some without my helmet. 1085 00:41:03,662 --> 00:41:05,204 How does my hair look? 1086 00:41:05,288 --> 00:41:06,831 I don't know, red? 1087 00:41:06,915 --> 00:41:08,332 Just take the pictures. 1088 00:41:08,416 --> 00:41:09,709 What do you need these for? 1089 00:41:09,793 --> 00:41:11,669 I'm trying to get some freelance welding work. 1090 00:41:11,753 --> 00:41:14,505 Hi, I'm here to discuss payment options for my class, 1091 00:41:14,589 --> 00:41:15,965 Advanced Arc Welding, second level. 1092 00:41:16,049 --> 00:41:18,634 Bring this back tomorrow with 300 bucks. 1093 00:41:18,718 --> 00:41:21,304 Added to the 200 that you already put down, 1094 00:41:21,388 --> 00:41:23,639 that's 20% of the tuition. 1095 00:41:23,723 --> 00:41:25,850 I can't bend past that. 1096 00:41:25,934 --> 00:41:27,184 Thank you. 1097 00:41:28,812 --> 00:41:30,396 Toto! 1098 00:41:30,480 --> 00:41:33,399 Toto, Toto, stop. 1099 00:41:34,985 --> 00:41:36,736 - Go. - Yo, ditch the weed! 1100 00:41:42,826 --> 00:41:44,201 What the hell? 1101 00:41:44,285 --> 00:41:45,703 Is that what you've been barking at? 1102 00:41:45,787 --> 00:41:47,663 Think I may have a cheap supplier 1103 00:41:47,747 --> 00:41:48,915 who specializes in weed. 1104 00:41:48,999 --> 00:41:51,876 How much do we need to sell to make 300 bucks by tomorrow? 1105 00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:54,337 I can unload it. Who's your supplier? 1106 00:41:54,421 --> 00:41:56,881 He goes by the street name Toto. 1107 00:42:06,349 --> 00:42:07,976 Good boy, Toto. 1108 00:42:12,480 --> 00:42:16,150 Ah, Mommy's gonna get her tuition. 1109 00:42:16,234 --> 00:42:18,402 Hi, sign me up for second semester, please. 1110 00:42:18,486 --> 00:42:21,698 Oh, it's good to see you made it back. 1111 00:42:24,159 --> 00:42:25,910 Don't ask. 1112 00:42:25,994 --> 00:42:27,787 You guys, Farhad found me a temp job 1113 00:42:27,871 --> 00:42:29,205 that pays 40 bucks an hour. 1114 00:42:29,289 --> 00:42:31,040 - Oh, yeah? - Some nighttime welding gig. 1115 00:42:31,124 --> 00:42:33,584 Oh, nighttime welding. Sounds kinda sketchy, Debs. 1116 00:42:33,668 --> 00:42:36,045 It took me two weeks to make 300 bucks walking dogs. 1117 00:42:36,129 --> 00:42:38,089 I can handle sketchy. 1118 00:42:38,173 --> 00:42:40,049 Hey, scab motherfucker! 1119 00:42:41,551 --> 00:42:44,011 Go, go! Fucking run! 1120 00:42:44,095 --> 00:42:46,764 Debbie, Debbie, run! 1121 00:42:46,848 --> 00:42:49,392 Come here, you motherfucker! 1122 00:42:50,518 --> 00:42:52,520 Shit! 1123 00:42:54,856 --> 00:42:56,440 It's wrong and it's dangerous. 1124 00:42:56,524 --> 00:42:57,650 I'm never being a scab again. 1125 00:42:57,734 --> 00:42:59,944 Hey, I just got a tip for another gig. 1126 00:43:00,028 --> 00:43:01,904 Pays even more. 1127 00:43:01,988 --> 00:43:02,905 I'm in. 1128 00:43:06,534 --> 00:43:07,910 Debbie! 1129 00:43:07,994 --> 00:43:10,454 Call 911! 1130 00:43:14,250 --> 00:43:16,002 Whoa. 1131 00:43:16,086 --> 00:43:17,670 Okay, just how we practiced. 1132 00:43:17,754 --> 00:43:20,047 Start with the little one, cut the joint. 1133 00:43:20,131 --> 00:43:23,551 Once you start, do not stop until you cut off all three. 1134 00:43:27,847 --> 00:43:29,724 Ow! Fuck! 1135 00:43:29,808 --> 00:43:31,308 Okay, let's do this. 1136 00:43:31,392 --> 00:43:33,394 I can see it in your eyes now 1137 00:43:36,481 --> 00:43:38,899 It ain't no secret and there won't be no surprise now 1138 00:43:38,983 --> 00:43:40,360 Shit! 1139 00:43:43,071 --> 00:43:45,322 Seen that look on you before 1140 00:43:45,406 --> 00:43:48,451 There's only one way this can go 1141 00:43:48,535 --> 00:43:51,579 What you waiting for 1142 00:43:51,663 --> 00:43:54,707 I know you like it 1143 00:43:54,791 --> 00:43:57,710 I know you do 1144 00:43:57,794 --> 00:44:01,297 I know you crave it, I know 1145 00:44:01,381 --> 00:44:02,840 What you waiting for 1146 00:44:02,924 --> 00:44:05,551 I mean, I'm a much better role model to Liam. 1147 00:44:05,635 --> 00:44:06,927 You'll always be a teen mom. 1148 00:44:07,011 --> 00:44:08,220 Okay, White Boy Carl. 1149 00:44:08,304 --> 00:44:09,638 Do you want some mayonnaise to go along 1150 00:44:09,722 --> 00:44:10,806 with that cultural appropriation? 1151 00:44:10,890 --> 00:44:12,266 Fuck you, 15 and pregnant. 1152 00:44:12,350 --> 00:44:14,393 MTV ain't shit anymore, and neither are you. 1153 00:44:14,477 --> 00:44:16,979 Well, at least I didn't turn on my own and become a cop. 1154 00:44:17,063 --> 00:44:19,148 At least I can wear open-toed shoes. 1155 00:44:25,280 --> 00:44:26,655 Are you serious? 1156 00:44:26,739 --> 00:44:28,365 Fight me, bitch. 1157 00:44:34,164 --> 00:44:35,706 Ow! 1158 00:44:35,790 --> 00:44:37,708 - Who are you? - Kyle. 1159 00:44:37,792 --> 00:44:38,751 What's your business here? 1160 00:44:38,835 --> 00:44:40,127 I may or may not be related 1161 00:44:40,211 --> 00:44:41,754 to your neighbor, Kevin. 1162 00:44:41,838 --> 00:44:44,548 Yo, period! Period! 1163 00:45:01,357 --> 00:45:02,817 Yes! 1164 00:45:02,901 --> 00:45:06,195 Oh, my God, I totally almost drowned a slut. 1165 00:45:06,279 --> 00:45:07,947 What's the matter with you? 1166 00:45:10,575 --> 00:45:12,827 Oh, it was a piece of shit anyway. 1167 00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:20,000 Never heard of that. 1168 00:45:20,084 --> 00:45:22,169 A girl who had to rape a boy to get laid. 1169 00:45:22,253 --> 00:45:24,839 How does that work? 1170 00:45:31,846 --> 00:45:33,305 Hey! 1171 00:45:35,892 --> 00:45:39,478 Get off of me! You slut! 1172 00:45:39,562 --> 00:45:40,896 Mama. 1173 00:45:40,980 --> 00:45:44,651 You do not F with Debbie Gallagher! 1174 00:45:47,070 --> 00:45:49,738 You know what I think is hilarious? 1175 00:45:49,822 --> 00:45:51,574 Carl, not the... not the vagina pillow. 1176 00:45:51,658 --> 00:45:53,659 Seriously, I... no. I've been working on that all... 1177 00:45:53,743 --> 00:45:56,913 No! Not the vagina! 1178 00:45:59,332 --> 00:46:01,417 Ow! Oh. 1179 00:46:06,547 --> 00:46:08,883 Hey 1180 00:46:21,104 --> 00:46:23,480 Shit. 1181 00:46:23,564 --> 00:46:25,399 Bullying is bad for society. 1182 00:46:25,483 --> 00:46:27,776 Very good. 1183 00:46:27,860 --> 00:46:30,529 Give me money, chihuahua. 1184 00:46:30,613 --> 00:46:32,448 What the hell are you guys doing? 1185 00:46:32,532 --> 00:46:34,200 Waking Frank's spirit. 1186 00:46:34,284 --> 00:46:35,743 Why don't you just do this? 1187 00:46:38,246 --> 00:46:39,914 I'm gonna fuck you up. 1188 00:46:39,998 --> 00:46:41,707 A new way, 360 degrees 1189 00:46:41,791 --> 00:46:43,500 I've got the power 1190 00:46:43,584 --> 00:46:44,752 The power of me 1191 00:46:44,836 --> 00:46:46,670 Anyone else wanna haze me? 1192 00:46:46,754 --> 00:46:48,380 Didn't think so. 1193 00:46:50,258 --> 00:46:51,884 Hey, jaywalking's illegal. 1194 00:46:51,968 --> 00:46:53,302 Buzz off. 1195 00:46:59,434 --> 00:47:00,851 Give me the fucking money. 1196 00:47:00,935 --> 00:47:01,936 Okay, you know what, asshole? 1197 00:47:02,020 --> 00:47:03,979 Pull the motherfucking trigger. 1198 00:47:04,063 --> 00:47:06,107 God fucking... 1199 00:47:07,525 --> 00:47:10,236 Fucker! Piece of fucking shit! 1200 00:47:10,320 --> 00:47:12,363 West Point motherfucking 1201 00:47:12,447 --> 00:47:17,035 lesbian sister piece of shit! 1202 00:47:18,619 --> 00:47:20,120 Check it. 1203 00:47:20,204 --> 00:47:21,163 Weed bread. 1204 00:47:21,247 --> 00:47:22,998 All you have to do is just like and follow, 1205 00:47:23,082 --> 00:47:24,166 and you get half off. 1206 00:47:24,250 --> 00:47:26,752 50,000 views in the first three hours? 1207 00:47:30,590 --> 00:47:31,799 Sasha? 1208 00:47:31,883 --> 00:47:33,592 Saw your video. 1209 00:47:33,676 --> 00:47:35,135 You're, like, Instagram famous now. 1210 00:47:35,219 --> 00:47:37,972 So I was thinking, maybe I was wrong about us. 1211 00:47:38,056 --> 00:47:40,641 Sorry, Sash, too little, too late. 1212 00:47:40,725 --> 00:47:41,892 I've actually moved on. 1213 00:47:43,227 --> 00:47:45,563 I think that's them right now. 1214 00:47:48,232 --> 00:47:50,902 What's up? 1215 00:47:51,694 --> 00:47:53,988 We'll be upstairs. 1216 00:47:56,824 --> 00:47:58,701 I think he'll be just fine. 1217 00:47:58,785 --> 00:48:01,287 They grow up so fast. 1218 00:48:01,371 --> 00:48:03,206 To being a Gallagher. 1219 00:48:20,932 --> 00:48:22,933 I play Carl Gallagher. 1220 00:48:23,017 --> 00:48:25,894 He's a very odd kid. 1221 00:48:25,978 --> 00:48:28,188 He'll do what he wants when he wants. 1222 00:48:28,272 --> 00:48:30,941 I had the best day of my life. 1223 00:48:31,025 --> 00:48:33,360 - Did you wear a face guard? - Nope. 1224 00:48:33,444 --> 00:48:35,571 How many more dogs are down there, Carl? 1225 00:48:35,655 --> 00:48:36,697 Just Rocco and Bernice. 1226 00:48:36,781 --> 00:48:38,615 They should be dead by the end of the week. 1227 00:48:39,826 --> 00:48:41,618 You just bought yourself 1228 00:48:41,702 --> 00:48:42,703 two more weeks' detention. 1229 00:48:42,787 --> 00:48:45,080 You know you misspelled your last name. 1230 00:48:45,164 --> 00:48:48,042 He doesn't exactly know sometimes what's going on. 1231 00:48:48,126 --> 00:48:49,585 Who was the first American president 1232 00:48:49,669 --> 00:48:51,545 to serve two nonconsecutive terms? 1233 00:48:51,629 --> 00:48:52,963 Fuck if I know. 1234 00:48:53,047 --> 00:48:54,214 But he doesn't really care. 1235 00:48:54,298 --> 00:48:55,382 Grover Cleveland. 1236 00:48:55,466 --> 00:48:56,800 Oh, from Sesame Street? 1237 00:48:56,884 --> 00:48:58,886 Hey, hey, hey, hey 1238 00:48:58,970 --> 00:49:01,764 And it's a crazy world 1239 00:49:01,848 --> 00:49:06,643 But I won't fall like a domino 1240 00:49:06,727 --> 00:49:08,854 No, no, no, no 1241 00:49:08,938 --> 00:49:10,731 I play Debbie Gallagher. 1242 00:49:10,815 --> 00:49:12,483 She's a take-charge kinda girl. 1243 00:49:12,567 --> 00:49:15,110 Hey! Only kids under 12 eat for free. 1244 00:49:15,194 --> 00:49:16,653 Everybody else pays. 1245 00:49:16,737 --> 00:49:19,114 She's trying to get through life without problems. 1246 00:49:19,198 --> 00:49:21,241 - Oh, there it is. - Is that a shiv? 1247 00:49:21,325 --> 00:49:22,451 Yep. Later. 1248 00:49:22,535 --> 00:49:24,286 Debbie tries to be Daddy's little girl, 1249 00:49:24,370 --> 00:49:25,537 but since her dad's drunk, 1250 00:49:25,621 --> 00:49:27,998 it doesn't really turn out the way she wants. 1251 00:49:28,082 --> 00:49:30,376 Frank Gallagher! 1252 00:49:30,460 --> 00:49:31,752 Show yourself! 1253 00:49:31,836 --> 00:49:34,046 This shit is about to get biblical! 1254 00:49:34,130 --> 00:49:36,215 I can see you're emotional. Let's just... 1255 00:49:36,299 --> 00:49:39,009 I am as cool as a motherfucking cucumber. 1256 00:49:39,093 --> 00:49:41,220 What's this 600 bucks you've already taken out 1257 00:49:41,304 --> 00:49:43,222 - of my discretionary money? - New couch. 1258 00:49:43,306 --> 00:49:44,640 There's nothing wrong with our couch. 1259 00:49:44,724 --> 00:49:47,309 You spent six months dribbling your broken leg juices 1260 00:49:47,393 --> 00:49:48,769 and piss all over it. 1261 00:49:48,853 --> 00:49:50,062 It's perfectly fine. 1262 00:49:55,318 --> 00:49:57,862 Uh, Debbie takes care of Liam. 1263 00:49:58,696 --> 00:50:02,574 Hi, baby bottoms. Did you have sweet dreams? 1264 00:50:02,658 --> 00:50:06,036 Like a domino 1265 00:50:06,120 --> 00:50:07,996 No, no, no 1266 00:50:08,080 --> 00:50:09,623 She takes care of Liam. 1267 00:50:09,707 --> 00:50:12,709 Oh, Liam. 1268 00:50:12,793 --> 00:50:13,669 Got him in time. 1269 00:50:13,753 --> 00:50:17,339 For you and me, yeah, yeah 1270 00:50:17,423 --> 00:50:20,551 She cares about Liam, because she takes care of him. 1271 00:50:20,635 --> 00:50:22,719 I'm sorry, I keep rambling. 1272 00:50:22,803 --> 00:50:25,013 How come my key doesn't work? 1273 00:50:25,097 --> 00:50:26,056 I changed the locks. 1274 00:50:26,140 --> 00:50:27,224 You have the rest of the cash 1275 00:50:27,308 --> 00:50:28,517 you owe me yet? 1276 00:50:28,601 --> 00:50:29,560 Nice job. 1277 00:50:29,644 --> 00:50:32,271 When you get the other 18.75, I'll get you a key. 1278 00:50:32,355 --> 00:50:33,564 Time 1279 00:50:33,648 --> 00:50:36,150 Yeah I got time 1280 00:50:36,234 --> 00:50:37,985 And it's all right 1281 00:50:38,069 --> 00:50:41,363 This is kinda like a once-in-a-life opportunity. 1282 00:50:41,447 --> 00:50:42,865 I mean, I'm really having fun. 1283 00:50:42,949 --> 00:50:44,658 It's just really cool 'cause there's 1284 00:50:44,742 --> 00:50:47,286 all these lights and four cam... Two cameras. 1285 00:50:47,370 --> 00:50:48,412 Two or three cameras. 1286 00:50:48,496 --> 00:50:50,622 There's all the special effects and everything. 1287 00:50:50,706 --> 00:50:52,124 It's just... it's, like, amazing. 1288 00:50:52,208 --> 00:50:53,041 It's so cool. 1289 00:50:53,125 --> 00:50:54,460 Go really shy on this one. 1290 00:50:54,544 --> 00:50:56,795 So should I not... Should I laugh still, 1291 00:50:56,879 --> 00:50:58,213 but, like, a little giggle? 1292 00:50:58,297 --> 00:50:59,506 Like ha-ha. 1293 00:50:59,590 --> 00:51:00,674 Got it. 1294 00:51:00,758 --> 00:51:02,718 Debbie has faith that one day maybe 1295 00:51:02,802 --> 00:51:05,971 her family will be the picture- perfect paradise family. 1296 00:51:06,055 --> 00:51:08,432 It serves you right for fucking that slut 1297 00:51:08,516 --> 00:51:09,808 with the cauliflower ears! 1298 00:51:09,892 --> 00:51:11,852 - I was not fucking her! - Yes, you did! 1299 00:51:11,936 --> 00:51:14,897 It was a blow job! 1300 00:51:14,981 --> 00:51:16,148 Ow! 1301 00:51:16,232 --> 00:51:17,316 ♪ Time ♪ 1302 00:51:17,400 --> 00:51:19,985 ♪ Yeah I got time ♪ 1303 00:51:20,069 --> 00:51:22,779 ♪ And it's all right ♪ 1304 00:51:22,863 --> 00:51:26,909 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 1305 00:51:26,993 --> 00:51:28,285 ♪ Time ♪ 1306 00:51:28,369 --> 00:51:30,871 ♪ Yeah I got time ♪ 1307 00:51:30,955 --> 00:51:33,790 ♪ And it's all right ♪ 1308 00:51:33,874 --> 00:51:36,502 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 1309 00:51:36,586 --> 00:51:39,129 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 1310 00:51:39,213 --> 00:51:41,965 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 1311 00:51:42,049 --> 00:51:44,676 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 1312 00:51:44,760 --> 00:51:47,346 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 1313 00:51:47,430 --> 00:51:50,977 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 1314 00:51:51,305 --> 00:52:51,253 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 90766