subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for Tammy.2014.1080p.BluRay.x264.YIFY

Afrikaans

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bengali

Bosnian

Bulgarian

Catalan

Cebuano

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional) Download

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish Download

Dutch

English Download

Esperanto

Estonian

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Khmer

Korean

Kurdish (Kurmanji)

Kyrgyz

Lao

Latin

Latvian

Lithuanian

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Nepali

Norwegian

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese

Punjabi

Romanian

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Sesotho

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhala

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Telugu

Thai

Turkish

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Odia (Oriya)

Kinyarwanda

Turkmen

Tatar

Uyghur

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,400 --> 00:00:05,449 (THE OUTFIELD'S "YOUR LOVE" PLAYING ON STEREO) 2 00:00:10,520 --> 00:00:14,320 ♪ Josie's on a vacation far away 3 00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:17,609 ♪ Come around and talk it over 4 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:21,731 WOMAN: (SINGING ALONG) ♪ So many things that I wanna say 5 00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:25,123 ♪ You know I like my girls a little bit older 6 00:00:25,280 --> 00:00:29,365 ♪ I just wanna use your love tonight 7 00:00:29,520 --> 00:00:31,170 Ooh! 8 00:00:31,320 --> 00:00:32,401 Unh, unh. 9 00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:36,963 ♪ I don't wanna lose your love tonight 10 00:00:37,520 --> 00:00:38,965 Unh. 11 00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:43,965 ♪ I ain't got many friends left to talk to 12 00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:46,805 ♪ Nowhere to run when I'm in trouble 13 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:50,963 ♪ You know I'd do anything for you 14 00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:54,802 ♪ Stay the night but keep it undercover 15 00:00:54,960 --> 00:00:59,010 ♪ I just wanna use your love tonight 16 00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:02,211 ♪ Oh, yeah 17 00:01:02,360 --> 00:01:04,727 ♪ I don't wanna lose your love tonight 18 00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:06,925 (TIRES SCREECH) 19 00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:10,004 (THUD & GLASS SHATTERING) 20 00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:13,005 (GROANS) 21 00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:16,411 Shit. 22 00:01:20,720 --> 00:01:22,722 What the hell? 23 00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:29,926 Oh, man. Not another one. 24 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:33,243 I shouldn't have been looking for my chapstick, buddy. 25 00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:39,171 You're just stunned, I think. 26 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:42,931 Yeah. I mean, you got the wind knocked out of you. 27 00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:45,248 I did that on a jungle gym. 28 00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:48,244 Had the wind knocked out of me too. 29 00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:52,003 I'll give you a couple seconds. You'll be fine. 30 00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:53,161 Yeah. 31 00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:55,611 Come on. 32 00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:58,007 Maybe you just need a little... 33 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:00,401 You want mouth-to-mouth, man? 34 00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:02,769 Maybe that'll help. 35 00:02:02,920 --> 00:02:06,527 I just... I don't want you to bite my mouth. 36 00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:08,682 (BLOWING AIR) 37 00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:15,049 There you go. That's helping. 38 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:19,970 Okay, come on. Let's walk it off, man. 39 00:02:20,200 --> 00:02:21,929 Get up on all fours. You can... 40 00:02:22,120 --> 00:02:24,521 (DEER GRUNTS THEN TAMMY SCREAMS) 41 00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:26,565 (TAMMY CHUCKLES) 42 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:28,609 Attaboy! Run! 43 00:02:31,520 --> 00:02:33,568 Look at you go! There you go! 44 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:35,404 Got a good gait. 45 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:38,964 Got a good gait. Yes! 46 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:42,124 (THE OUTFIELD'S "YOUR LOVE" PLAYING ON STEREO) 47 00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:50,966 ♪ Your love... 48 00:02:58,760 --> 00:03:00,330 (LOCK CLICKS) 49 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:03,290 KEITH: Where are my chicken sandwiches, Larry? Come on, let's go. 50 00:03:03,440 --> 00:03:06,125 Somebody get these. Oh, my God. 51 00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:07,805 Tammy, get over here. 52 00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:09,928 You're late again. Do you own a watch much? 53 00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:12,407 I know I'm late. A deer jumped out of nowhere. 54 00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:14,403 KEITH: You look like crud. Oh, my God. 55 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:16,449 Get off the floor. 56 00:03:18,520 --> 00:03:20,090 Tammy, my office. Now. 57 00:03:20,240 --> 00:03:23,528 TAMMY: I'm coming, Keith. God. 58 00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:33,767 Tammy, do you know how I got to where I am? 59 00:03:35,160 --> 00:03:37,322 Sucking dick and kissing ass? 60 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:38,521 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 61 00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:40,400 Excuse me, Keith. We need some more ketchup. 62 00:03:40,520 --> 00:03:43,364 Okay. English, though, Javier. This is America. 63 00:03:43,520 --> 00:03:45,966 - It was English. - That wasn't English. 64 00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:48,445 - Is that blood? TAMMY: - Yeah. 65 00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:50,329 A deer hit my car on the way in. 66 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,687 - You should maybe see a doctor. - No kidding. 67 00:03:52,840 --> 00:03:56,083 KEITH: Okay, thanks, Javier. That's great advice. See you later. 68 00:03:56,240 --> 00:03:59,961 Tammy, I'm terminating your employment at Topperjack's. 69 00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:01,485 You've gotta be shitting me. 70 00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:04,405 No, I'm terminating your employment. I need your badge. 71 00:04:04,560 --> 00:04:06,449 What ba...? You mean my name tag? 72 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:09,644 - Yes, exactly. I need your badge back. TAMMY: - It's not a badge. 73 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:12,485 It's a name tag, and you made me buy it with my own money. 74 00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:14,722 That's company policy. I need it back. 75 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:18,680 Well, I need you to stop sweating through your shirts and grossing everybody out. 76 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:22,611 It is hot. And when it's hot, people sweat. 77 00:04:22,760 --> 00:04:24,960 - Not like that. Not like that. KEITH: - It's how it is. 78 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:26,764 - That shit's medical. KEITH: - Listen! 79 00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:30,447 Tammy, you have already been fired. I have already terminated your employment. 80 00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:32,284 You are at least 40 seconds fired... 81 00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:35,284 ...so please exit the Topperjack's. 82 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:39,081 Fine. You know what? I'm gonna give you this. 83 00:04:39,240 --> 00:04:40,321 - Tammy. TAMMY: - I got it here. 84 00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:42,642 KEITH: - It's your middle finger. - No. 85 00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:43,887 Poom. 86 00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:45,485 Read between the lines. 87 00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:48,126 I knew that you were gonna do it, so it's not as good. 88 00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:50,567 - I get it, Tammy. - Poom. You get that? 89 00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:53,326 KEITH: - What is that? - A little version of this. 90 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:55,841 Hey, don't let a deer hit you on the way out. 91 00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:59,406 You dick. You know what? 92 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:03,281 Don't let these ketchup packets get stuck in your gross armpits. 93 00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:07,286 - You'll have to buy new shirts, you dick. - Those are Topperjack's supplies. 94 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:10,205 You are no longer an employee of Topperjack's. 95 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:13,284 - Oh. - Yeah, that shit's contaminated now! 96 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:18,009 For overtime due, Keith. Overtime due. 97 00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:20,686 - Tammy, just get out. - Enjoy the special sauce. 98 00:05:20,880 --> 00:05:23,281 KEITH: Do not touch the Tower Deluxe burgers. 99 00:05:23,440 --> 00:05:25,761 Those buns are still good. Just change the hats. 100 00:05:25,920 --> 00:05:27,126 Yeah. 101 00:05:27,280 --> 00:05:29,965 - Yeah, that's what I thought. - I'm calling the police! 102 00:05:31,320 --> 00:05:35,803 Uh, just thought you should know that the meat here is real shitty. 103 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:37,849 - Oh, God. - Real, real, real shitty. 104 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:39,764 - That's the truth. - That's not true. 105 00:05:39,920 --> 00:05:42,605 That's not chicken. I don't know what it is, but it's not bird. 106 00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:44,728 It's 110 percent chicken. 107 00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:47,531 Bird doesn't come out of squeezy tubes. 108 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:51,287 My gut fear, it's mostly dick and beak. 109 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:53,442 - She's disgruntled. - You know what? 110 00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:56,649 WOMAN: - Oh. KEITH: - Aah, my elbow! 111 00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:58,290 TAMMY: Poom. 112 00:05:58,480 --> 00:06:00,244 Later, loser. 113 00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:02,164 (CHUCKLES) 114 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:10,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 115 00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:14,043 Oh, are you...? 116 00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:17,564 Shit. 117 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:19,484 You kidding me? 118 00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:27,922 (METAL CLAN KING) 119 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:32,802 Aw, man. 120 00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:38,086 Shit. 121 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:42,489 TAMMY: A little help? A little help? 122 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:45,883 A little help! Come on! 123 00:06:46,040 --> 00:06:47,963 Yeah, karma. 124 00:06:48,120 --> 00:06:50,441 Yeah, we'll see. 125 00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:37,844 TAMMY: God. Hey, Greg. I'm home. 126 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:41,004 Think your ringer's off. I've been calling you. 127 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:43,527 That asshole Keith fired me. 128 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:46,040 Can you believe that shit? Like, who would wanna work there? 129 00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:48,527 (ON STEREO) How much I feel 130 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:50,444 Feel for you, baby 131 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:51,886 What's going on here? 132 00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:54,489 Hey, Tammy. 133 00:07:54,680 --> 00:07:56,603 Wow, you're home so early. 134 00:07:57,960 --> 00:08:00,247 - I'm sorry you got fired. TAMMY: - Shut up, Missi. 135 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:03,210 Why are you in my house making my husband dinner? 136 00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:06,364 Uh, actually, I made her dinner. 137 00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:08,568 You're gonna get your ass kicked. 138 00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:10,768 You hungry? You wanna eat my fist for din...? 139 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:12,570 Ow! Shit. 140 00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:15,047 I am so sorry, Tammy. You startled me. 141 00:08:15,200 --> 00:08:17,601 Keep your dirty fingers out of my mouth. 142 00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:19,569 You scratched my tongue. 143 00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:21,210 I'm leaving you, Greg. 144 00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:24,204 I'm taking the household money and getting out of here. 145 00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:27,044 God! Nice, Greg! 146 00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:29,168 You have to cheat with the neighbor? 147 00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:32,170 You can forget about me feeding your stupid cats, Missi. 148 00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:36,490 - I'm divorcing you, and I'm suing you, bitch. - For what? 149 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:39,849 For being an asshole. That's what I'm suing you for. 150 00:08:42,680 --> 00:08:45,047 Why is there only $63 in here, Greg? 151 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:47,089 Whatever. I'm keeping all of it. 152 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:50,928 - Ow! Shit. - Are you okay? 153 00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:53,686 I'm fine! 154 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,731 I feel great. Pervs. 155 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:00,570 Assholes. 156 00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:07,963 You two deserve each other. 157 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:10,201 Shit. 158 00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:11,731 Goddamn it. 159 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:13,723 Just don't touch anything. 160 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:16,121 And don't let her touch my underwear. 161 00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:21,240 You know, you never made me dinner. Not even once. 162 00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:25,488 And it smells really good too. 163 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:33,526 Yeah, I'll see you in court! 164 00:09:33,680 --> 00:09:36,729 I hope you both choke on your shitty dinner! 165 00:09:36,880 --> 00:09:39,087 Assholes. 166 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,923 Missi Jenkins is a whore! 167 00:09:42,080 --> 00:09:44,686 And I kicked her ass! 168 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:47,161 Kicked her stupid ass. 169 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:49,527 Don't call me, Greg, when she dumps you! 170 00:09:49,680 --> 00:09:51,921 Because I won't call you back! 171 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:54,367 No fucking way! 172 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:58,127 I'm gonna be too busy fucking models and shit! 173 00:09:58,320 --> 00:09:59,685 Mom! 174 00:10:01,480 --> 00:10:02,606 Mom! 175 00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:03,761 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 176 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,729 TAMMY: Mom, open the door! 177 00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:10,288 Greg's cheating on me, Mom. 178 00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:12,647 - What? - Yeah, I know. 179 00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:14,569 What a jerk, right? 180 00:10:14,720 --> 00:10:16,404 What happened? 181 00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:22,010 I went home after a shitty day, and Greg and Missi Jenkins... 182 00:10:22,160 --> 00:10:25,607 ...are having, like, a really romantic dinner at our dining room table. 183 00:10:25,760 --> 00:10:26,921 And Greg made it. 184 00:10:27,080 --> 00:10:30,289 Okay, then I'm sorry. That's terrible. 185 00:10:30,480 --> 00:10:34,201 I'm not exactly thrilled about it myself. I just need to borrow your car. 186 00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:35,811 Why? Where's yours? 187 00:10:35,960 --> 00:10:39,681 Mine is smoking on Highway 13 because a deer jumped out in front of me. 188 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:42,889 Can I just have your car so I can get out of this shitty town? 189 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:45,486 I will drive you to work. I'm not giving you my car. 190 00:10:45,640 --> 00:10:48,689 I don't need you to drive me to work, okay? Keith fired me. 191 00:10:48,840 --> 00:10:50,126 Little prick. 192 00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:53,204 - Are we really gonna do this again, Tammy? - What? 193 00:10:53,360 --> 00:10:56,443 DEB: Every time something bad happens, you throw a fit... 194 00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:59,524 ...say you're leaving, you never get more than 10 miles outside of town... 195 00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:03,486 ...you start feeling sorry for yourself, and you come back and throw another fit. 196 00:11:03,680 --> 00:11:05,648 - That's not true. - It's a pattern. 197 00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:07,006 It's not a pattern. 198 00:11:07,160 --> 00:11:09,208 - It is. - That's not even what a pattern is. 199 00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:12,125 A pattern is a thing that comes in pairs of two. 200 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:13,611 You just don't know science. 201 00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:16,081 A pattern is a series of things or events... 202 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:19,642 ...that repeat themselves on and on, sometimes into infinity. 203 00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:21,848 That's what a galaxy is. It's not a pattern. 204 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:23,331 - Fine. - God. 205 00:11:23,480 --> 00:11:26,484 If you don't wanna help me, just give me the keys to Dad's truck. 206 00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:30,531 - No. Absolutely not. - Fine. Then I'm gonna take Grandma's car. 207 00:11:30,680 --> 00:11:34,127 - No, you're not. She is old and not well. - Then she doesn't need a car. 208 00:11:34,280 --> 00:11:35,725 Right? You answer that. 209 00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:38,161 - Don't go. Tammy. - Grandma, I need your car keys. 210 00:11:38,320 --> 00:11:42,325 Yep, I heard everything, and I am ready to go. 211 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:44,770 I'm taking your car. I'm not taking you. 212 00:11:44,920 --> 00:11:47,287 - You're not getting my car unless you take me. TAMMY: - No. 213 00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:48,930 - Oh, yeah. What? DEB: - Mom. 214 00:11:49,080 --> 00:11:51,003 - What, you packed a bag? PEARL: - Yeah. 215 00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:53,731 Wait a minute. No one is going anywhere. 216 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:56,121 I am. I'm just not taking this asshole with me. 217 00:11:56,280 --> 00:12:00,330 Hey. You're not exactly my first choice for a traveling companion either... 218 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:03,563 ...but you're the best bet I have to get out of this stupid house. 219 00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:06,485 I'm sorry, Deborah, but it is a stupid house. And I hate it. 220 00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:09,803 I love you, but I am not gonna die in this house alone. 221 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:13,407 You're not gonna die here alone. You're gonna die here with me and Don. 222 00:12:14,560 --> 00:12:17,848 - That's a shitty thing to say. - That's a very shitty thing to say. 223 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:20,048 I meant it in a good way. 224 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,248 - What's a good way? DEB: - Oh, my God. 225 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:23,561 Never mind. 226 00:12:23,760 --> 00:12:25,285 - Shitty. - Very shitty. 227 00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:27,522 Your doctor says you have to take it easy. 228 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:29,802 Dr. Lansing is an imbecile. Do we have a deal? 229 00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:32,088 No offense, but no fucking way. 230 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:34,641 I have $6700 in cash. 231 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:37,531 Bullshit. Prove it. 232 00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:40,651 Yeah. That's gonna do it. 233 00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:43,768 DEB: - Mom. Tammy. - You snooze, you lose. 234 00:12:43,920 --> 00:12:45,251 DEB: This is ridiculous. 235 00:12:49,240 --> 00:12:51,481 Don't call me at 2 a.m. looking for a ride. 236 00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:54,405 - Yeah, I won't. - Mom. Please tell me you have your pills. 237 00:12:54,560 --> 00:12:58,167 - Oh, Deborah, unclutch. - Goddamn it. I'm gonna call Brookview. 238 00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:00,527 - I swear to God. - You do what you need to, baby. 239 00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:01,727 Bye, Mom. 240 00:13:04,320 --> 00:13:05,651 Not a good idea. 241 00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:07,683 It's a little swollen. It's okay. 242 00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:09,604 (HORN HONKING) 243 00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:19,571 What's Brookview? 244 00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:24,282 It's an old folks' home. Like a prison for old people. 245 00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:26,124 Horrible place. 246 00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:28,731 I don't know where I'm going. 247 00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:32,162 I've always wanted to go to Niagara Falls. 248 00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:34,041 Okay. 249 00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:40,610 That was a stop sign. 250 00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:43,402 Yeah, I'm aware of that. I know that. 251 00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:47,967 All right, do you think we could just try to be pleasant? What do you say? 252 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,248 - How about a beer? - No. 253 00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:54,041 - Um, whiskey. - Jesus, no. 254 00:13:55,160 --> 00:13:56,685 Oh, my God. 255 00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:58,490 You're pregnant. 256 00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:02,804 I'm driving a car, Grandma. Do you see what I'm doing? 257 00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:06,009 Just because you can't see through your Magoo goggles... 258 00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:08,606 ...doesn't mean I'm not doing what I'm doing. 259 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:10,444 All right. I'm sorry. Sorry. 260 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:11,886 God. 261 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:13,929 You know what? Screw it. Give me a beer. 262 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,930 Oh. Yes. Okay, here you go. 263 00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:22,847 One little beer can't hurt, right? 264 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,161 (PEARL CHUCKLING) 265 00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:27,247 (BOTH WHOOPING) 266 00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:31,129 (BOTH SHRIEKING) 267 00:14:31,280 --> 00:14:34,284 - Lock the door. - Spin it, spin it, spin it. 268 00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:35,441 I got it. 269 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:37,563 (LAUGHING) 270 00:14:37,720 --> 00:14:38,721 (SCREAMING) 271 00:14:42,320 --> 00:14:45,005 TAMMY: - Hello, cows. - Ha-ha-ha. 272 00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:49,165 I'm sorry you're so tasty, cows. 273 00:14:49,360 --> 00:14:53,729 I'm gonna fuck you up between two sesame buns. 274 00:14:53,880 --> 00:14:55,882 (BOTH LAUGHING) 275 00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:59,124 Whoa! That's a bump. Aah! 276 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:03,531 (LAUGHS) 277 00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:05,648 I stuck the landing! 278 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:07,330 (LAUGHS) 279 00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:09,642 You wanna go ride a cow? 280 00:15:16,160 --> 00:15:17,810 (GRUNTS) 281 00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:21,525 TAMMY: Oh, shit. 282 00:15:24,520 --> 00:15:26,887 - Where the hell are we? - Shh, shh, shh. Come here. 283 00:15:28,200 --> 00:15:30,362 When I was a young girl, I used to feed deer... 284 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:33,922 ...right out of my hand at my grandparents' cabin. And there was this one deer... 285 00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:39,325 Hyah! Hyah! Get out of here! Get out of here. 286 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:41,448 You never did appreciate nature. 287 00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:44,089 Not when it totals my Corolla. 288 00:15:44,240 --> 00:15:46,004 No. Thank you. 289 00:15:50,320 --> 00:15:52,322 How the hell did we even get in here? 290 00:15:52,880 --> 00:15:53,961 Oh, my God. 291 00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:55,406 - You know what? - What? 292 00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:57,801 I think this is some X-Files shit. 293 00:15:57,960 --> 00:16:00,327 - For sure. - I don't know. 294 00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:04,445 You know what? If we die out here, we're just raccoon food. 295 00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:08,440 - Ha, ha. - It's not funny. I saw that on a show. 296 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:11,444 - Let's go. Get in the car. We're going home. - Home? 297 00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:14,206 - Yeah. Home. - What? 298 00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:17,682 You're always talking about how much you wanna get out of that town... 299 00:16:17,840 --> 00:16:19,569 ...and we finally are out of it. 300 00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:23,441 And then one little thing happens, and you just wanna just run on back? 301 00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:24,726 (ENGINE STARTS) 302 00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:27,127 Come on. Let's go. 303 00:16:28,840 --> 00:16:30,444 Fine. 304 00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:33,768 I'm not surprised. You always were a quitter. 305 00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:35,729 - I'm not a quitter. - Yes, you are. 306 00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:38,247 Yeah? Really? Does a quitter do this? 307 00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:42,769 - Aah! God, I got it stuck. - It's all right. Go ahead. Push. 308 00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:45,682 - That's it. Little bit more. - It's crushing it. 309 00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:48,446 - That's okay. Crush it. You got it. - I am not a quitter! 310 00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:50,250 - You're a doer. - I am a doer. 311 00:16:50,440 --> 00:16:51,805 That's it. That's it. 312 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:53,325 (ENGINE REVVING & TAMMY SCREAMING) 313 00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:54,925 You got it. You got it. 314 00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:57,526 - Do it. Do it. There you go. - Aah! 315 00:16:58,000 --> 00:16:59,684 I am not a quitter! 316 00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:02,848 PEARL: - Oh, Shit. - Aah! 317 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:04,280 Who's a quitter now? 318 00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:07,083 TAMMY: - Aah! PEARL: - Whoa. 319 00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:09,447 TAMMY: Oh. 320 00:17:09,640 --> 00:17:11,085 Sorry about that! 321 00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:14,968 You should wear a helmet. FYI. 322 00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:16,687 Whoa. 323 00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:23,851 - Oh, God. - "Mark Twan National Forest." 324 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,162 - Where are we? PEARL: - We're in Missouri. 325 00:17:26,320 --> 00:17:30,245 We went in the wrong direction. And you do know who Mark Twain is, right? 326 00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:31,805 I know who he is. 327 00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:34,606 Good guy. 328 00:17:34,760 --> 00:17:38,048 He's a good guy. 329 00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:40,890 Okay, Tammy. 330 00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:43,447 - Tammy, listen up. - What? 331 00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:45,841 Well, you're at a crossroads, right? 332 00:17:46,040 --> 00:17:50,125 You could change the trajectory of your whole life. 333 00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:52,567 You've got time. I've got money. 334 00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:56,641 You don't wanna go back to that town. You deserve to have a little fun. 335 00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:58,080 Right? 336 00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:00,242 (BOTH CHUCKLING) 337 00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:02,402 (ALL CHATTERING) 338 00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:10,045 There's no alcohol on the dock. 339 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:13,330 It's my juice. 340 00:18:13,480 --> 00:18:16,131 (WHOOPING AND LAUGHING) 341 00:18:17,840 --> 00:18:19,842 (WHOOPING) 342 00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:24,211 One hand! 343 00:18:24,360 --> 00:18:26,931 - Well, that's not safe. - No. 344 00:18:27,120 --> 00:18:29,282 I am ripping shit up! 345 00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:30,851 Yeah! 346 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:35,011 Enjoy my spray! Because I'm spraying you! 347 00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:36,207 Slow down! 348 00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:37,930 (TAMMY WHOOPS) 349 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:39,844 Look at that. She is so brave. 350 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:43,800 Coming in hot! I am coming in smoking hot! 351 00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:45,325 Smoking hot! 352 00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:46,527 (WHOOPS) 353 00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:50,002 Might be too hot! Throttle's jammed! Too hot! 354 00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:54,603 Oh, my God. Tammy? Tammy! 355 00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:58,925 Tammy! Oh, my God. You scared the shit out of me. 356 00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:00,411 I can't believe this. 357 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:03,882 Aw, shit. I lost my glasses. Shit. 358 00:19:06,920 --> 00:19:08,843 Are you kidding? Forty-eight hundred dollars? 359 00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:12,283 Is that your scam? Huh? You like taking money from little old ladies? 360 00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:14,966 You break it, you buy it. You're lucky I don't call the police. 361 00:19:15,120 --> 00:19:18,886 That machine malfunctioned on me. You're gonna be hearing from my lawyer. 362 00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:22,328 All right, just stop it, Tammy. Here you go, $4800. 363 00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:26,963 Don't give him cash. Put it on your card and dispute it later. I do it all the time. 364 00:19:27,120 --> 00:19:29,726 I don't believe in credit cards. Cash is real. 365 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:32,281 You should be charging shit like crazy, because you're old. 366 00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:35,882 - By the time they come to get it, you might not... PEARL: - Go in the car. 367 00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:39,044 - ...still be here. You could be dead. - Get in the car. 368 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:42,647 - I'm trying to help you with your business. - Get in the car. 369 00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:45,762 - Hey. TAMMY: - Dick. 370 00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:47,251 She's an idiot. 371 00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:50,529 Muscle shirts are for muscles. 372 00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:04,801 I said I'm sorry about the 4 grand. 373 00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:07,802 Four thousand 800 bucks. 374 00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:11,169 "Four thousand 800 bucks." 375 00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:13,211 Pay you back. 376 00:20:28,440 --> 00:20:30,442 There we go. 377 00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:32,127 How much you put in? 378 00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:37,081 Thirty bucks of gas, and we won $10. 379 00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:38,924 Ooh, halfsies. 380 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:42,523 Hey, hang on, I wanna clean out the junk in this... 381 00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:44,808 On the floor. Wait a minute. 382 00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:47,930 There's garbage all over the floor. 383 00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:55,606 You're taking your old-people pills and stuff, right? 384 00:20:56,720 --> 00:21:00,611 Yeah. I don't need them, but, um, I'm taking them. 385 00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:07,729 Wait a minute, let me get up all this junk. 386 00:21:07,880 --> 00:21:09,006 We should frame this. 387 00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:13,331 Okay, come on, get in. 388 00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:30,290 PEARL: - I have to pee. TAMMY: - Why didn't you go at the gas station? 389 00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:33,810 - I'm gonna pull over. You can go in the woods. PEARL: - Oh, no. No way. 390 00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:40,363 TAMMY: So why do you wanna go to Niagara Falls, anyway? 391 00:21:41,280 --> 00:21:43,203 Well, I was supposed to go with my daddy. 392 00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:46,370 He was gonna take me when I was about 8 or 9. 393 00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:48,887 But he got too busy working. 394 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:51,884 And then he got too busy getting sick and dying. 395 00:21:52,080 --> 00:21:54,811 - So I never did get to see it. - Oh. 396 00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:57,002 And now... 397 00:21:57,160 --> 00:22:01,131 ...some 60-odd years later... 398 00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:06,241 ...I'm gonna get to see Niagara Falls with you, with my granddaughter. 399 00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:11,646 Don't you think that's pretty special? 400 00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:13,165 I think so. 401 00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:18,486 TAMMY: Are you sitting on a couch or a toilet? Because this is like a therapy session. 402 00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:19,641 (TAMMY CHUCKLES) 403 00:22:20,080 --> 00:22:22,811 Hey! Come here! 404 00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:24,567 Yeah? 405 00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:27,569 Look at this thing. 406 00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:29,730 - Do you believe that? - No. 407 00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:31,690 TAMMY: - Right? PEARL: - Right. 408 00:22:31,840 --> 00:22:34,081 TAMMY: It's amazing. America, huh? 409 00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:37,282 - Really, yeah. - Yeah. 410 00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:39,681 It says he carved it with a chainsaw. 411 00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:41,531 - Do you believe that? - I do. 412 00:22:41,680 --> 00:22:44,604 I can't believe that's possible. You do that with a chainsaw... 413 00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:46,848 ...and create that kind of artwork, the end. 414 00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:50,925 You just... I think you should just slam that chainsaw down and be like: 415 00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:52,525 "Look what I did." 416 00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:55,007 Yeah, it's... It's cool. It's okay. 417 00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:58,124 - I like it. - "Okay"? It's majestic. 418 00:22:58,480 --> 00:22:59,891 - Heh. TAMMY: - It's not "okay." 419 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:02,611 I mean, that is super cool. You're just jealous. 420 00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:07,084 - Oh, please. - What've you ever done that's that cool? 421 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:09,602 - Uh... - Nothing. Short list. 422 00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:11,922 I watched Neil Armstrong walk on the moon. 423 00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:15,530 - Wait, on his bike? - That's Lance. 424 00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:17,728 I don't care which brother it is. 425 00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:20,565 That's still lame compared to this. 426 00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:22,404 Boo. 427 00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:26,364 I had a six-month relationship with one of the Allman Brothers. 428 00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:27,726 (TAMMY CHUCKLES) 429 00:23:27,920 --> 00:23:30,446 Right. Yeah, me too. Heh. 430 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:33,649 - Bullshit. - Watch your language. It happened. 431 00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:34,847 TAMMY: Oh, my God. 432 00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:37,961 Did you really have an affair with Gregg Allman? 433 00:23:38,120 --> 00:23:39,360 No. With Duane. 434 00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:40,641 Who? 435 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:43,280 Duane Allman. The brother. 436 00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:48,927 - Did you at least get to meet Gregg? - Of course. I got to meet him a lot. 437 00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:52,084 I was on the bus for most of their first tour. 438 00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:53,441 - What? PEARL: - Yes. 439 00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:57,530 I have to say that's, like, one of the coolest things... 440 00:23:57,680 --> 00:24:01,366 ...anyone in our family has ever, ever, ever done... 441 00:24:01,520 --> 00:24:04,091 ...like, going back to when we were cave people. 442 00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:08,167 Probably is, actually. I never thought of it that way. 443 00:24:08,320 --> 00:24:11,324 (SCATTING THE ALLMAN BROTHERS BAND'S "MIDNIGHT RIDER") 444 00:24:12,480 --> 00:24:16,724 (SINGING) I got to run to keep from hidin' 445 00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:18,245 - Remember that? - That's good. 446 00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:22,325 And I'm bound to keep on ridin' 447 00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:25,251 - And I've got one more PEARL: - One more 448 00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:26,965 Silver dollar 449 00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:28,326 And, like, he goes low. 450 00:24:28,480 --> 00:24:30,642 BOTH: I ain't gonna let 'em catch me, no 451 00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:31,847 Ain't gonna let 'em... 452 00:24:32,000 --> 00:24:33,729 Go low. 453 00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:34,927 BOTH: Midnight rider 454 00:24:35,080 --> 00:24:37,367 TAMMY: - Get your chin out. You do it... - Rider 455 00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:39,682 - Not, like, in a weird way. - Rider 456 00:24:39,840 --> 00:24:41,205 (BOTH SCATTING) 457 00:24:41,360 --> 00:24:45,331 - And I got one more silver dollar - One more silver dollar 458 00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:47,881 Little lower. You're off. Listen. 459 00:24:48,040 --> 00:24:49,201 BOTH: Let you, no 460 00:24:49,360 --> 00:24:53,604 Not gonna let 'em catch the midnight rider 461 00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:57,009 - That's it. Better. Better. - Der-ner-ner der-ner-ner, bom 462 00:24:57,160 --> 00:24:58,605 (BOTH SCATTING) 463 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:03,723 You know, one time, I got fingered by Boz Scaggs. 464 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:05,247 Tammy. 465 00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:08,410 No, it's okay. It turns out it wasn't actually Boz Scaggs. 466 00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:13,327 PEARL: - Okay. TAMMY: - It's a good bird. 467 00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:16,450 PEARL: Yeah. Sweetie, it's a great bird. 468 00:25:45,120 --> 00:25:48,283 PEARL: Yes, we're here. We found it. Yep, we're here. 469 00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:52,007 You know what? I can smell it from the parking lot. I think you're right. 470 00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:54,162 She says this is the best BBQ in the city. 471 00:25:54,360 --> 00:25:56,442 Then let's have dinner and get off the phone. 472 00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:58,204 Oh, no, sweetie. We can't. Thanks. 473 00:25:58,360 --> 00:26:00,775 - We already checked in to a hotel. - Give me my phone. Bye. 474 00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:02,564 - We'll see you tomorrow. - Bye. 475 00:26:02,720 --> 00:26:04,131 - Love you. Bye. - Don't hit me. 476 00:26:04,280 --> 00:26:06,215 - What are you doing? TAMMY: - Give me my phone. 477 00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:08,481 - We're not going to see Lenore. - Why? 478 00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:11,689 Because hanging out with an old lesbian is not my idea of a good time. 479 00:26:11,880 --> 00:26:14,008 Oh, don't be silly. She's an amazing woman. 480 00:26:14,160 --> 00:26:16,561 She's remarkable. She just lives life. 481 00:26:16,760 --> 00:26:18,330 She just grabs it by the horns. 482 00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:21,768 I mean, you could learn a lot from her. If you paid attention. 483 00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:23,490 - Are you...? - What? 484 00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:24,727 - Don't do that. - What? 485 00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:26,609 - Ugh. - What? 486 00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:29,240 What are you, gay for Lenore? You love her so much? 487 00:26:29,440 --> 00:26:30,965 She is my cousin. 488 00:26:31,120 --> 00:26:33,361 My God. Would it be so terrible if I were gay? 489 00:26:33,520 --> 00:26:34,680 I don't care if you're gay... 490 00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:37,531 Can we please just stop talking about your twang? 491 00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:39,603 - I'm very proud of my twang. - Ugh! 492 00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:46,326 (PLAYING "JOHN HENRY") 493 00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:49,563 Mm, mm. I am loving this brisket. How's yours? 494 00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:52,564 It's really good. I love the bark. 495 00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:55,371 - And I would know because I'm a bark shark. - Mm. 496 00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:58,565 BIG AL: (SINGING) Sittin' on his mama's knee 497 00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:02,481 There are some juicy-looking gentlemen in here tonight. 498 00:27:02,680 --> 00:27:06,287 - Ha, ha. - I think we might just get lucky. 499 00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:08,329 - I might. - You might. 500 00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:10,966 Don't know about you. It'd show Greg, wouldn't it? 501 00:27:11,120 --> 00:27:12,690 Yeah. 502 00:27:12,840 --> 00:27:15,525 Ah. You know what? It's too easy for me. 503 00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:19,082 I mean, I can go out there, and I can get any guy in this room. 504 00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:20,975 - Really? TAMMY: - I don't know what it is. 505 00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:23,890 But guys have always been drawn to me. Kind of like flies on shit. 506 00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:28,120 You might in the future wanna say "bees to honey." 507 00:27:29,560 --> 00:27:31,210 Why? 508 00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:35,921 What is this power? I would like to see this power in action right now. 509 00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:37,081 (CHUCKLES) 510 00:27:37,240 --> 00:27:39,811 - Yeah? You ready? - Yes. 511 00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:43,521 All right. You better get a notebook out and a sharp pen. 512 00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:46,520 - This is gonna be a goddamn Clinic. - I can't wait. You show me, girl. 513 00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:49,570 - Pay attention. - Uh-huh. 514 00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:51,165 Go ahead. 515 00:27:51,320 --> 00:27:53,243 I got two. I got two. 516 00:27:56,200 --> 00:27:59,409 You wanna buy me a drink and slide some parts around? 517 00:27:59,960 --> 00:28:01,166 I'm sorry. What? 518 00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:06,122 - Like that? Is that what you want? MAN: - I, um... 519 00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:07,691 - What? TAMMY: - Unh. 520 00:28:08,360 --> 00:28:09,600 Wrong answer. 521 00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:13,003 You wanna buy me some drinks and get up in this? 522 00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:16,127 I'm gonna pass, but thanks. 523 00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:19,890 Well, fuck you, and fuck you too. 524 00:28:20,040 --> 00:28:22,202 Poom! Fuckers. 525 00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:30,447 Stupid. 526 00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:34,122 I think they were together. That must be why. 527 00:28:34,320 --> 00:28:36,846 Oh. Now, that makes sense. 528 00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:39,401 You can't work your magic on that, right? 529 00:28:39,560 --> 00:28:41,642 I mean, I'm magic, but not... 530 00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:44,280 It's cool. I didn't get... 531 00:28:44,440 --> 00:28:47,284 Hey, I'm cool with your lifestyle choice. 532 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:50,603 - Yeah. Gay it up. - What? 533 00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:52,569 I didn't know. 534 00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:53,767 Here you go. 535 00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:55,803 TAMMY: - Thanks. - To your honey. 536 00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:57,684 (TAMMY CHUCKLES) 537 00:29:02,080 --> 00:29:03,081 (BOTH LAUGH) 538 00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:04,810 - Oh. Hoo. PEARL: - Mm, mm, mm. 539 00:29:04,960 --> 00:29:07,804 Now, let's turn your honey back to the music. 540 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:09,803 TAMMY: "Turn my honey." 541 00:29:09,960 --> 00:29:11,371 Mm. 542 00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:12,846 I just got that. 543 00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:15,722 I just got "bees to honey." 544 00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:18,042 It does sound better than "flies on shit." 545 00:29:18,200 --> 00:29:20,965 - Yeah. - Because "flies on shit" would... 546 00:29:21,120 --> 00:29:23,361 - Mean you're... - Yeah. All right. 547 00:29:23,520 --> 00:29:26,285 I'm gonna keep that cataloged because I use that a lot. 548 00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:28,363 - Okay. - Whoo! 549 00:29:28,520 --> 00:29:30,488 Mm, mm, mm. 550 00:29:30,640 --> 00:29:32,051 (TAMMY WHOOPING) 551 00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:33,440 TAMMY: I like your hat! 552 00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:43,441 BIG AL: When he was a new baby boy 553 00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:46,729 Sittin' on his mama's knee 554 00:29:46,880 --> 00:29:50,123 He picked up a hammer And a little piece of steel 555 00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:52,170 Three o'clock. 556 00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:54,891 Got something on the radar at 3... 557 00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:56,485 That's 9. 558 00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:58,802 - Where are you putting your 12? - Straight ahead. 559 00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:01,088 Look at 3. Three, 3, 3. 560 00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:04,326 Oh, boy. 561 00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:07,450 He's coming over. He's coming over. He's coming over. 562 00:30:07,600 --> 00:30:09,364 - All right. EARL: - Hi there. 563 00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:11,727 A little birdie told me you might need some more beer. 564 00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:14,360 Well, that's one smart little birdie. 565 00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:15,760 (EARL CHUCKLES) 566 00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:17,001 You two sisters? 567 00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:20,209 No. She's like 100. 568 00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:21,361 (PEARL KICKS TAMMY) 569 00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:25,047 - Ow. - I'm Earl, and this is my boy. 570 00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:29,525 Howdy. I'm Pearl, and that's my Tammy. 571 00:30:29,720 --> 00:30:32,246 - Hey. - Hey. 572 00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:34,323 - Oh. Good grip. Thank you. BOBBY: - Mm-hm. 573 00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:35,845 What's your name, Good Grip? 574 00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:39,891 - I'm Bobby Tillman. - Yeah, you are. Huh. 575 00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:41,644 Yeah, I am. 576 00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:43,086 Yeah, you are. 577 00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:46,603 What do you do for a living? 578 00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:48,444 I run my dad's farm. 579 00:30:48,600 --> 00:30:49,965 - Cool. - Right. 580 00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:53,567 Hey, Connie, can you bring some shooters over here? 581 00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:55,802 This lady would like to get intoxicated. 582 00:30:57,400 --> 00:31:00,051 - That'll work, won't it? - Oh. 583 00:31:00,640 --> 00:31:02,768 So farm, huh? 584 00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:04,371 BOBBY: Yep. 585 00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:07,171 - Dancing juice. That's what we need. - Thank you. 586 00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:10,688 (SINGING) Hey, babe, here lam I'm a man on the scene 587 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:14,921 I can give you what you want But you've got to come home with me 588 00:31:15,080 --> 00:31:19,165 I have got some good old lovin' And I got some more in store 589 00:31:19,320 --> 00:31:23,211 When I get through throwin' it on you You've got to come back for more 590 00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:27,530 Boys and things that come by the dozen That ain't nothin' but drugstore lovin' 591 00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:31,127 Hey, little thing, let me light your candle 'Cause, Mama, I'm so hard to handle, now 592 00:31:31,320 --> 00:31:33,288 - It gets around - Whoo! 593 00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:37,083 (CROWD CHEERING) 594 00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:38,446 BIG AL: All right. 595 00:31:41,760 --> 00:31:45,446 Ha-ha-ha. All right. Thank you very much. We're gonna take a little break. 596 00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:48,649 TAMMY: One more time! 597 00:31:48,840 --> 00:31:50,729 That was amazing. 598 00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:52,166 Whoo! 599 00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:54,368 We gotta take a break! 600 00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:56,090 Whoo! 601 00:31:56,240 --> 00:31:57,321 Oh, my God. 602 00:31:57,480 --> 00:31:59,847 Ha, ha. Oh! 603 00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:01,729 You need a cool-off. Right? 604 00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:05,727 I am so sweaty. I was ripping it up out there. 605 00:32:05,880 --> 00:32:08,884 Everybody was kind of really just working as a unit. 606 00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:10,849 I kept calling you in. Did you see me? 607 00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:12,935 - You looked great out there. Yeah. TAMMY: - Oh. 608 00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:14,530 - Well, I can move. - Yeah. 609 00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:16,569 Ha, ha. You're so bad. 610 00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:19,244 - Dad. - Mm? What? What? 611 00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:21,721 Don't you think it's time to go? 612 00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:25,089 Well, look, Bobby, let's not be rude, okay? 613 00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:26,730 I haven't finished my drink yet. 614 00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:29,486 (EARL LAUGHS) 615 00:32:29,640 --> 00:32:32,166 Now that's gonna take a little bit of time. 616 00:32:32,320 --> 00:32:34,402 (EARL & PEARL LAUGHING) 617 00:32:34,560 --> 00:32:35,800 I'm going to the bathroom. 618 00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:39,009 When I come back, we're leaving. I don't care if you finish your drink. 619 00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:40,366 ALL: Ooh. 620 00:32:40,560 --> 00:32:41,925 (ALL CHUCKLE) 621 00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:44,924 I'm gonna go pick up that hint he just dropped. 622 00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:46,570 (CHUCKLES) 623 00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:48,563 Hey, is this the bathroom line? 624 00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:54,249 (BOBBY SIGHS) 625 00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:00,448 Um, what are you doing? 626 00:33:00,600 --> 00:33:02,762 Just wondering where your wife is tonight. 627 00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:07,163 - I'm not married. - Let's light this candle. 628 00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:11,728 Whoa. Okay. All right. Come on. I do not want your tongue in my mouth. 629 00:33:11,920 --> 00:33:14,161 Then where do you want it, man? 630 00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:15,361 (DOOR OPENS) 631 00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:18,000 No, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. You just... 632 00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:20,731 - You're welcome. - Okay. 633 00:33:22,080 --> 00:33:25,402 Not a chance. 634 00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:30,449 Good set, man. 635 00:33:36,960 --> 00:33:39,008 Thanks a lot. 636 00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:42,010 Just ditching me in there. 637 00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:44,851 Can't find my grandma anywhere. Do you know where she is? 638 00:33:45,040 --> 00:33:46,121 I do, unfortunately. 639 00:33:46,280 --> 00:33:48,965 Oh! God! Hey! 640 00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:51,568 (PEARL GIGGLING) 641 00:33:51,720 --> 00:33:53,927 PEARL: - Just go away. We're fine. - God. 642 00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:55,650 I think she took my keys. 643 00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:58,411 Did you take my keys, Grandma? Are you kidding me? 644 00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:00,406 Come on. 645 00:34:00,600 --> 00:34:02,284 Dad. Cut it... Oh, man. 646 00:34:02,440 --> 00:34:04,602 PEARL: - Ee! - Oh, my God. 647 00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:07,491 PEARL: - Oh! - I don't wanna know what that was. 648 00:34:08,080 --> 00:34:09,161 Ugh. 649 00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:13,002 That's a shitty way to end the night. 650 00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:14,605 You're telling me. 651 00:34:18,240 --> 00:34:21,323 Sorry I, you know, made that... 652 00:34:22,000 --> 00:34:23,729 ...little pass at you... 653 00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:26,921 ...in there. - "Little pass"? 654 00:34:28,040 --> 00:34:30,122 - Tsk. - That was kind of aggressive. 655 00:34:30,280 --> 00:34:31,770 Damn it, I'm saying I'm sorry. 656 00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:34,725 No, it's okay. I was flattered. It was just surprising. 657 00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:36,206 You know. 658 00:34:36,840 --> 00:34:38,968 Honestly, for the night as a whole... 659 00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:42,329 ...it wasn't the worst thing that happened. 660 00:34:43,480 --> 00:34:45,130 Do I say "thank you" to that? 661 00:34:45,680 --> 00:34:49,162 - Yeah, there's a compliment in there. - In there somewhere. 662 00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:50,446 BOBBY: Oh, God. Don't look. 663 00:34:51,080 --> 00:34:54,209 - Oh! Oh! Oh! - I just told you not to look. Why did you look? 664 00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:55,600 I tried to save you from that. 665 00:34:55,720 --> 00:34:59,805 Because by saying it, it's like an invitation to look. 666 00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:03,284 It's like if somebody says, "Does this smell weird to you?"... 667 00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:05,920 ...and they put it out, you lean in and you smell it. 668 00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:07,281 You don't smell it. 669 00:35:07,440 --> 00:35:09,727 But you do. You lean in and you smell it. 670 00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:13,521 I would not smell something if somebody told me not to smell it. 671 00:35:13,680 --> 00:35:15,880 - I can guarantee you that. - I don't think that's true. 672 00:35:16,000 --> 00:35:17,001 (EARL GRUNTS) 673 00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:19,367 - Dad. All right, enough! PEARL: - We're only at first base. 674 00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:21,363 Oh, boy, here comes second. 675 00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:24,364 BOBBY: Dad, this is not fair to Mom. Come on, man. 676 00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:27,367 - "Mom"? - It's complicated. 677 00:35:27,560 --> 00:35:29,289 Yeah, you think? I think so. 678 00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:31,289 - Hey, Grandma! EARL: - Sorry, nobody's home. 679 00:35:31,480 --> 00:35:34,290 - That asshole is married! - Come on, Dad. 680 00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:37,324 TAMMY: - He's married! EARL: - Sorry, darling, the inn is closed. 681 00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:39,444 I'm sorry, but he is an asshole. 682 00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:42,843 I agree. He's a little bit of an asshole. I can't... 683 00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:44,001 (BOTH SIGH) 684 00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:45,326 Will you do me a favor? 685 00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:48,802 My mom is home alone and she's sick, and I need to get back with her. 686 00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:52,721 So do you have like a pen or something I could borrow real quick? 687 00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:55,567 Yeah, I think so. 688 00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:59,283 All right. Look. If they come out of there at a certain point... 689 00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:01,761 ...just give me a call and I'll come pick him up. 690 00:36:01,920 --> 00:36:03,570 Here. 691 00:36:03,760 --> 00:36:05,250 Thank you. 692 00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:07,281 I knew you were into me. 693 00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:09,771 I got your digits. 694 00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:14,407 Sorry, that was stupid. That was dumb. 695 00:36:14,560 --> 00:36:15,891 BOBBY: All right, Tammy. 696 00:36:16,040 --> 00:36:18,202 Thanks for holding down the fort. I appreciate it. 697 00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:21,006 Yeah, I'll watch him. 698 00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:23,805 Appreciate it. 699 00:36:23,960 --> 00:36:25,291 - Thanks. - Good luck. 700 00:36:25,440 --> 00:36:27,807 Thanks. Bye, Bobby. 701 00:36:32,440 --> 00:36:34,408 Bye. 702 00:36:34,560 --> 00:36:37,006 PEARL: Oh! Yes, Earl. 703 00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:39,447 You know who she fucked? Duane Allman. 704 00:36:39,600 --> 00:36:41,887 Yeah, she fucked the wrong Allman Brother. 705 00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:43,883 Enjoy that. 706 00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:49,001 - It's 119, Grandma. I said it. 119, 119. - 119. 119. 707 00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:51,401 Could you not do...? Can I just have my shit back? 708 00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:55,446 No, no. Come on. A gentleman always carries a lady's things. 709 00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:59,321 - Oh, bingo. 119. You're right. 119. - Yeah, great. 710 00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:03,485 So you wanna come in for, um... 711 00:37:03,640 --> 00:37:06,610 ...some color TV or sex? - Yeah. Mm. 712 00:37:06,760 --> 00:37:08,967 No. We had a deal. 713 00:37:09,160 --> 00:37:11,766 Yeah. Bullshit. Don't you dare. Don't you dare. 714 00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:14,241 You are too old to be this strong. 715 00:37:14,400 --> 00:37:16,926 Open this door, Grandma. Goddamn it. 716 00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:18,605 Hey, Tammy. 717 00:37:18,760 --> 00:37:21,411 - We need some ice, baby. Okay? - Yeah. Fuck you, Earl. 718 00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:23,562 - Fuck you. EARL: - Aw. Ow. 719 00:37:23,760 --> 00:37:25,603 - Come on. TAMMY: - Oh. Aah! 720 00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:31,040 Oh, shit. 721 00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:34,125 I gotta... 722 00:37:34,280 --> 00:37:36,169 I gotta pee. 723 00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:46,481 All right. Let's go for B2. 724 00:37:50,040 --> 00:37:51,087 You piece of shit. 725 00:37:51,240 --> 00:37:52,241 (BEEPS) 726 00:37:53,680 --> 00:37:55,887 I paid for you. 727 00:37:57,920 --> 00:38:00,366 Come on, you tasty motherfucker. 728 00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:08,369 Yeah, now who wins? 729 00:38:08,520 --> 00:38:09,760 Me. 730 00:38:35,160 --> 00:38:36,525 Tammy? 731 00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:39,401 Hey, Tammy. 732 00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:43,211 Tammy. 733 00:38:44,920 --> 00:38:46,843 Tammy, what are you doing out here? 734 00:38:48,440 --> 00:38:49,601 Oh. 735 00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:51,723 They wouldn't let me in the room. 736 00:38:52,960 --> 00:38:54,689 You slept outside? 737 00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:59,010 Oh, my God. Here, let me help you up. Come here. 738 00:38:59,160 --> 00:39:00,764 - Thanks. - Yeah. Of course. 739 00:39:00,920 --> 00:39:02,445 Oh. You're all dirty. 740 00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:07,171 She took my keys... 741 00:39:08,160 --> 00:39:11,323 ...and I just didn't want them driving off and doing something stupid. 742 00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:13,801 That's why I gave you my number. You should have called me. 743 00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:16,924 Oh, I didn't think you meant that. 744 00:39:17,120 --> 00:39:21,091 I said it. I meant it. Okay? 745 00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:24,481 All right, Dad, come on. We gotta go. 746 00:39:24,640 --> 00:39:26,130 I'm sorry about all this. 747 00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:28,886 Well, I mean, you didn't do it. 748 00:39:29,040 --> 00:39:32,089 I'm the one who's supposed to be keeping him out of trouble. 749 00:39:32,240 --> 00:39:34,447 I don't think you're very good at it. 750 00:39:34,640 --> 00:39:39,601 - Ha, ha. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm tired. - No, I think you might be right. 751 00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:42,125 Oh, God. 752 00:39:42,280 --> 00:39:44,362 Tammy, what are you doing out here? 753 00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:46,568 All right. Let's go, boy. 754 00:39:47,880 --> 00:39:50,167 Dad. Truck's this way. 755 00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:53,164 Gotcha. 756 00:39:58,280 --> 00:40:00,089 - Well... - Well. 757 00:40:01,160 --> 00:40:02,924 I guess this is goodbye again. 758 00:40:04,040 --> 00:40:05,121 Yep. 759 00:40:05,280 --> 00:40:07,567 I'll take care of that one. You take care of that one? 760 00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:10,124 Okay. 761 00:40:13,240 --> 00:40:16,130 - See you, Bobby. - See you, Tammy. 762 00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:25,007 Thanks again. 763 00:40:26,080 --> 00:40:27,445 Yep. 764 00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:45,080 SERVER: - Get that out of your way. Sure. - I am so hungry. Thank you. Mm. 765 00:40:45,600 --> 00:40:49,685 It's been such a long time since I've had a good servicing. 766 00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:51,644 You know what I mean? Ha, ha. 767 00:40:51,840 --> 00:40:54,411 Pass me the ketchup. Please. 768 00:40:55,280 --> 00:40:57,806 You know, I didn't bring you on this trip to babysit you. 769 00:40:59,200 --> 00:41:01,123 You are on this trip because of me. 770 00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:05,080 Because of my car and my money. What's left of it. So you just watch your mouth. 771 00:41:05,240 --> 00:41:08,722 Yeah, I'm too busy watching you screw crusty old men in dirty hotel rooms. 772 00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:12,089 Oh, God, here we go. You gonna blame me for everything, like always? 773 00:41:12,280 --> 00:41:15,329 I do. I blame you for shoving me out of a hotel room last night... 774 00:41:15,480 --> 00:41:17,209 ...and letting me sleep outside like a dog. 775 00:41:17,360 --> 00:41:20,364 You're on your second Bloody Mary. It's not even 10 a.m. 776 00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:22,204 This is vegetables. 777 00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:26,649 I blame you for packing up your shit and making me come home from school when I was 10... 778 00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:29,610 ...and finding an empty room, that's what I blame you for. 779 00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:33,401 You know how shitty that was for a little kid? You left me all alone. 780 00:41:33,560 --> 00:41:36,131 - Your parents were there. TAMMY: - It's not the same. 781 00:41:36,280 --> 00:41:38,567 You were my best friend, and you just left me. 782 00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:44,924 I'm probably gonna need a tetanus shot because I got nipped by a raccoon last night. 783 00:41:45,080 --> 00:41:48,846 All right. Tammy, I know I've done some wrong things in my life... 784 00:41:49,000 --> 00:41:51,480 ...but you don't know everything. 785 00:41:51,640 --> 00:41:54,564 I know I don't need you, and I don't need your money. 786 00:41:54,720 --> 00:41:56,643 - But I'm gonna take your car. - What? 787 00:41:56,800 --> 00:41:59,690 - Let's see how you like getting left. - Don't you leave me here. 788 00:41:59,840 --> 00:42:01,922 You cannot leave me here. You come back here. 789 00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:03,281 All right, now sit down. 790 00:42:03,440 --> 00:42:06,091 TAMMY: Anybody wanna screw my grandma? Just get her a drink. 791 00:42:30,280 --> 00:42:31,770 (CELL PHONE RINGS) 792 00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:37,841 - Hi, Mom. DEB: (OVER PHONE) - Tammy, put Grandma on. 793 00:42:38,000 --> 00:42:40,002 Uh, she's in the bathroom right now. 794 00:42:40,200 --> 00:42:42,123 Tammy, she left all of her pills here. 795 00:42:42,280 --> 00:42:44,760 High blood pressure, heart, everything. She's diabetic. 796 00:42:44,920 --> 00:42:46,524 She cannot go unmedicated. 797 00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:48,284 Do you understand what I'm saying? 798 00:42:48,440 --> 00:42:50,249 - I get that. - Listen to me. 799 00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:52,607 She thinks she can handle it, but she can't. 800 00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:55,648 - Tammy. - Yeah, I know she can't. 801 00:42:55,840 --> 00:42:58,127 - Bye, Mom. - I don't think you do, because you... 802 00:42:58,280 --> 00:43:00,760 Tammy. Don? 803 00:43:00,920 --> 00:43:02,570 Shit. 804 00:43:07,560 --> 00:43:09,562 (SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY) 805 00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:29,209 You gotta be kidding me. 806 00:43:32,080 --> 00:43:34,970 One. Two. 807 00:43:35,120 --> 00:43:37,248 One. 808 00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:40,281 - Two. - I told you you can't drink in here. 809 00:43:41,240 --> 00:43:43,049 PEARL: - One. Two. - I'm calling the cops. 810 00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:47,603 - You don't have to call the oops. I got her. - Oh. Well. 811 00:43:47,760 --> 00:43:49,000 Look who came back. 812 00:43:49,640 --> 00:43:52,120 Yeah. I came back. 813 00:43:52,280 --> 00:43:54,123 - You did it, huh? - What? 814 00:43:54,280 --> 00:43:55,691 Drunk by 11. 815 00:43:55,840 --> 00:43:58,605 Mm. Ah. What do I win? 816 00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:01,091 Car ride with me. 817 00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:05,681 Come on. I'm pretty sure you've had enough. 818 00:44:05,840 --> 00:44:08,161 You know, this is real cherry. 819 00:44:08,320 --> 00:44:10,926 And guess what my secret ingredient is. Try some. 820 00:44:11,120 --> 00:44:12,531 Is it whiskey? 821 00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:15,445 No. It's whiskey. Ha-ha-ha. 822 00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:17,489 - All right. Let me just... PEARL: - No. 823 00:44:17,640 --> 00:44:19,240 TAMMY: - Let's go. PEARL: - This is mine. 824 00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:21,209 - I need my beer. TAMMY: - You got beer? 825 00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:22,771 Yeah. I got beer. 826 00:44:22,920 --> 00:44:24,763 - They're still in the store. PEARL: - Bye. 827 00:44:24,920 --> 00:44:26,490 Okay, we're leaving right now. 828 00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:30,207 - Just get the drunk out of here. TAMMY: - You know what? 829 00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:33,604 - All right. Watch it. PEARL: - Oh, hey. 830 00:44:33,760 --> 00:44:36,240 - Hi. Thanks for the beer. TAMMY: - What? 831 00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:38,363 Yeah, nice try. I'm not buying you beer. 832 00:44:38,520 --> 00:44:42,366 No, you don't have to. I already bought it for them because these are my new friends. 833 00:44:42,520 --> 00:44:45,205 This is Jesse. And the girl. 834 00:44:45,360 --> 00:44:47,328 And we have an arrangement... 835 00:44:47,480 --> 00:44:51,485 ...where I'm getting them the beer, and they're gonna give me a ride out of here. 836 00:44:52,400 --> 00:44:53,890 How? On their bikes? 837 00:44:54,080 --> 00:44:56,731 The fucking old lady promised us a beer, so give it to me. 838 00:44:56,920 --> 00:44:59,366 Don't swear in front of my grandma, you piece of shit. 839 00:44:59,520 --> 00:45:01,329 Hey, you're being a real bitch, lady. 840 00:45:01,480 --> 00:45:04,006 Don't say "lady." I'm not that much older than you. 841 00:45:04,160 --> 00:45:07,687 What do you care? If you don't give us beer, we're gonna turn to drugs... 842 00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:12,767 I hope you do drugs. I want you to do bath salts and then eat her face off. 843 00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:14,285 - Just give it to me. TAMMY: - No! 844 00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:15,845 - I'll take that. - Cool it, Jesse. 845 00:45:16,000 --> 00:45:20,210 Don't shake the beer. It's gonna explode. I thought you were cool. Stop it, Jesse. 846 00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:22,289 - I'm not afraid to hit a girl. - Neither am I. 847 00:45:22,440 --> 00:45:24,329 (JESSE & PEARL GROAN) 848 00:45:24,480 --> 00:45:28,007 Get off me! Get off me, you fucking rat! 849 00:45:29,240 --> 00:45:30,321 Yeah, nice jeans shorts. 850 00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:31,606 (SIREN WAILS) 851 00:45:31,760 --> 00:45:33,364 Oh, fuck. The cops! 852 00:45:33,520 --> 00:45:35,170 TAMMY: Hey! 853 00:45:35,320 --> 00:45:37,971 Don't. That's my grandma's beer! 854 00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:44,331 Oh, God. I'm sorry! 855 00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:46,565 - I'm sorry. That... - Uh-uh. 856 00:45:46,760 --> 00:45:48,205 Put your hands up. 857 00:45:48,360 --> 00:45:49,885 All right. All right. 858 00:45:50,040 --> 00:45:53,601 Get your hands up. 859 00:45:54,920 --> 00:45:58,686 Two pens. One half-eaten Rolos. One lighter. 860 00:45:59,200 --> 00:46:02,443 Hairbrush. One necklace. 861 00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:03,931 Two bags of trail mix. 862 00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:06,162 Forty-two dollars and... 863 00:46:06,360 --> 00:46:08,169 ...10, 20... 864 00:46:08,320 --> 00:46:11,244 ...23 cents. Sign here. 865 00:46:12,200 --> 00:46:13,611 TAMMY: Yeah. 866 00:46:15,320 --> 00:46:17,322 (TAMMY SNORING) 867 00:46:22,240 --> 00:46:24,527 (STOPS SNORING) 868 00:46:29,880 --> 00:46:31,211 (TAMMY SNORTS) 869 00:46:33,880 --> 00:46:36,406 - What are you doing? - You were snoring and then you stopped. 870 00:46:36,600 --> 00:46:39,365 I just wanted to check and see if you were still breathing. 871 00:46:39,560 --> 00:46:41,005 I'm sorry. 872 00:46:41,160 --> 00:46:43,731 Well, keep your fingers out of my nose. 873 00:46:43,880 --> 00:46:47,123 No, I mean I'm sorry for landing us in here. 874 00:46:51,760 --> 00:46:55,606 Well, it's not like you're the worst person in the world. 875 00:46:55,760 --> 00:46:58,161 I mean, you're close, but... 876 00:47:01,440 --> 00:47:02,771 I cheated on Greg. 877 00:47:04,880 --> 00:47:06,644 With the ice-cream man. 878 00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:12,209 You had intercourse with Jerry Miller? 879 00:47:12,360 --> 00:47:14,522 No. I didn't do it with him. 880 00:47:14,720 --> 00:47:17,405 I just let him play with my boobs. 881 00:47:18,360 --> 00:47:20,681 You didn't do it for the free ice cream, did you? 882 00:47:22,200 --> 00:47:23,645 Not at first. 883 00:47:25,040 --> 00:47:27,407 I don't know why I did it. 884 00:47:27,560 --> 00:47:30,723 I think at first, I just wanted attention... 885 00:47:30,880 --> 00:47:33,201 ...and then I kind of got hooked on Klondikes. 886 00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:36,450 I don't know. 887 00:47:38,160 --> 00:47:40,481 Maybe I'm the worst person in the world. 888 00:47:41,640 --> 00:47:43,404 Oh, I don't think that. 889 00:47:44,720 --> 00:47:46,449 What's worse than Jerry Miller? 890 00:47:49,760 --> 00:47:52,001 I tried to sleep with your father. 891 00:47:52,160 --> 00:47:53,650 What? 892 00:47:53,800 --> 00:47:56,087 I tried to sleep with your father. 893 00:47:58,040 --> 00:47:59,451 Ew. 894 00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:01,881 Nothing happened. Don was a perfect gentleman. 895 00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:05,806 He put me back to bed before your mother got home. Nothing happened. Nothing. 896 00:48:07,720 --> 00:48:11,611 Look, I was not in my right mind for many years because of the drinking... 897 00:48:11,760 --> 00:48:14,445 ...and when I realized that I'd stepped over the line... 898 00:48:14,600 --> 00:48:19,447 ...where I was actually thinking of sleeping with my own daughter's husband... 899 00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:24,208 ...well, then I just didn't know what could happen and... 900 00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:26,929 That's why I left. 901 00:48:33,000 --> 00:48:35,082 Oh, my God. 902 00:48:35,520 --> 00:48:37,329 - Grandma. - No, don't. Ow. They're fine. 903 00:48:37,480 --> 00:48:40,643 TAMMY: - My God, they look really bad. - They're fine. 904 00:48:40,800 --> 00:48:42,484 MANNIS: - Tammy Banks? TAMMY: - Yeah. 905 00:48:42,640 --> 00:48:45,962 - Let's go. Bail's been posted. - Okay. Let's go. 906 00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:50,125 Yeah. I bailed you out, but I'm gonna stay a little bit longer. 907 00:48:50,320 --> 00:48:52,004 Just there's a little, um... 908 00:48:52,920 --> 00:48:54,604 ...small glitch. 909 00:48:54,760 --> 00:48:56,205 MANNIS: Let's go. 910 00:48:57,960 --> 00:49:00,088 We're charging her with possession of oxycodone. 911 00:49:00,240 --> 00:49:03,050 Well, she's got prescriptions for everything. She's old. 912 00:49:03,200 --> 00:49:06,568 She had 32 oxycodone pills, and they were not prescribed to her. 913 00:49:06,720 --> 00:49:08,643 Judge set her bail at $3000. 914 00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:12,927 We don't have that kind of money. Jesus, she needs to get out of there now. 915 00:49:13,080 --> 00:49:16,050 You know she's got diabetes and probably tons of other shit. 916 00:49:16,200 --> 00:49:18,851 I've got diabetes. Glen's got diabetes. 917 00:49:19,000 --> 00:49:21,241 Diabetes is a very manageable condition. 918 00:49:21,400 --> 00:49:25,371 I don't give a fuck about Glen. I'm sorry. I don't. I don't know you. 919 00:49:25,560 --> 00:49:27,608 My grandma needs to get out of there now. 920 00:49:27,760 --> 00:49:29,285 Then you better get $3000. 921 00:49:31,400 --> 00:49:34,449 - How am I supposed to do that? - It's not my problem, lady. 922 00:49:36,080 --> 00:49:38,367 - Yeah, thanks a lot. CURTIS: - You're welcome. 923 00:49:38,520 --> 00:49:41,410 - I didn't mean "thank you." - I didn't mean "you're welcome." 924 00:49:41,560 --> 00:49:44,564 You're done here. You better leave while you can. 925 00:49:55,320 --> 00:49:56,924 - Yeah, she did. Yes. - She did? 926 00:49:57,080 --> 00:49:58,411 (PHONE RINGING) 927 00:49:58,560 --> 00:49:59,891 (BOTH LAUGH) 928 00:50:00,040 --> 00:50:02,202 GREG: (OVER PHONE) - Hello? - Hey, it's me. 929 00:50:02,360 --> 00:50:05,091 Do we have, like, a Christmas account or a savings account with...? 930 00:50:05,240 --> 00:50:06,730 (MISSI LAUGHS OVER PHONE) 931 00:50:08,200 --> 00:50:09,326 Is she there? 932 00:50:09,920 --> 00:50:11,490 GREG: Uh, yeah. 933 00:50:12,000 --> 00:50:13,889 Okay, bye. 934 00:50:29,600 --> 00:50:31,284 DEB: (OVER PHONE) How much? 935 00:50:31,440 --> 00:50:33,727 - Sixteen hundred dollars. - What? 936 00:50:33,920 --> 00:50:36,366 No, I'm not gonna fund your spring break. 937 00:50:36,520 --> 00:50:38,363 Why hasn't your grandma called me back? 938 00:50:38,520 --> 00:50:41,285 Could you just trust me for once, okay? 939 00:50:41,440 --> 00:50:43,204 Can I just have the money? 940 00:50:43,360 --> 00:50:45,010 What's wrong? Is it Grandma? 941 00:50:45,160 --> 00:50:48,130 - No. I told you she was fine. - Oh, God. 942 00:50:48,280 --> 00:50:49,930 I told you this was a bad idea. 943 00:50:50,080 --> 00:50:52,845 But you didn't wanna listen to me- I hate to say it, but... 944 00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:54,490 ...I told you so. 945 00:50:54,640 --> 00:50:57,291 I know you're right. But I know how to fix this now. 946 00:50:57,440 --> 00:50:58,441 How are you gonna fix it? 947 00:50:58,600 --> 00:51:00,011 (DOOR OPENS) 948 00:51:00,560 --> 00:51:03,040 Hello? Tammy? Tammy? 949 00:51:03,240 --> 00:51:06,244 I gotta go. I know what I'm gonna do. 950 00:51:08,760 --> 00:51:10,649 I can do this. 951 00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:15,124 Be a bad-ass. 952 00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:18,204 I am a bad-ass. I'm a bad-ass. 953 00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:10,842 (POP MUSIC PLAYING INDISTINCTLY OVER SPEAKERS) 954 00:52:11,560 --> 00:52:13,847 TAMMY: Aah. My finger. 955 00:52:19,560 --> 00:52:20,641 (CLEARS THROAT) 956 00:52:21,480 --> 00:52:23,130 (TAMMY CLEARS THROAT) 957 00:52:27,080 --> 00:52:28,570 Freeze. Nobody move. 958 00:52:31,320 --> 00:52:32,321 (GRUNTS) 959 00:52:32,480 --> 00:52:34,244 - Shit. Don't move. - Okay. 960 00:52:34,400 --> 00:52:35,561 TAMMY: Don't move. 961 00:52:36,320 --> 00:52:38,049 Unh. Dang it. 962 00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:41,406 (GRUNTS) 963 00:52:41,560 --> 00:52:43,528 Don't even think about it. 964 00:52:45,520 --> 00:52:47,966 I'm gonna need you to put all the cash in a bag. 965 00:52:48,120 --> 00:52:50,726 - Okay. TAMMY: - Hey, you. Get out here. 966 00:52:50,880 --> 00:52:53,963 Keep your hands where I can see them. 967 00:52:54,120 --> 00:52:56,521 Hey, just make it... I only need 1600, really. 968 00:52:56,680 --> 00:52:59,570 - You don't want all of it? TAMMY: - No, just 1600. 969 00:52:59,720 --> 00:53:01,324 My grandma's still got 1400. 970 00:53:01,480 --> 00:53:03,687 - Just make it 1650. Round up. - Okay. 971 00:53:03,840 --> 00:53:06,889 TAMMY: You, give me some pies. Give me some of the good pies. Hey! 972 00:53:07,040 --> 00:53:08,280 - What? TAMMY: - Jesus. 973 00:53:08,440 --> 00:53:10,727 I said, give me some of those pies. 974 00:53:10,880 --> 00:53:14,965 Take them from the back so they're fresh. All right, you, go to the other register. 975 00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:17,009 - Get the higher bills. Go. BECKY: - Okay, okay. 976 00:53:17,160 --> 00:53:18,650 TAMMY: Reach to the back, man. 977 00:53:18,840 --> 00:53:20,922 Don't give me shitty pies. You'll regret it. 978 00:53:21,640 --> 00:53:23,722 No screwing around. 979 00:53:24,320 --> 00:53:26,846 I got you both covered. All right? 980 00:53:27,000 --> 00:53:31,164 But excuse me. That's your finger, though. 981 00:53:31,320 --> 00:53:34,403 TAMMY: Is it? Is that just my finger? 982 00:53:34,600 --> 00:53:36,568 I'm not sure. Is it? 983 00:53:36,720 --> 00:53:37,926 TAMMY: Shut up. 984 00:53:38,080 --> 00:53:40,970 I would... For your own sake, don't get sassy. 985 00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:43,009 - Okay. Sorry. Yeah. TAMMY: - Okay? 986 00:53:43,160 --> 00:53:45,970 - Just get pie. You want some pies? - I like pie. 987 00:53:46,120 --> 00:53:48,771 TAMMY: Well, get a pie out for you, get a pie out for... 988 00:53:48,920 --> 00:53:52,242 If you change your attitude, I'd like to give you some pies. On me. 989 00:53:52,400 --> 00:53:54,289 No, thanks. I don't care for them. 990 00:53:54,440 --> 00:53:57,125 TAMMY: Goddamn it. What did we just talk about? 991 00:53:57,280 --> 00:53:59,567 I have a gun on you. I offered you pie. 992 00:53:59,720 --> 00:54:02,326 He likes pies. He's got a gun to his face. 993 00:54:02,480 --> 00:54:05,962 Anything I say, he's gonna like. I ask you. You want some pies? 994 00:54:06,120 --> 00:54:07,929 I like pies. 995 00:54:08,080 --> 00:54:10,082 TAMMY: Come on, that's what I'm talking about. 996 00:54:10,240 --> 00:54:12,322 I feel like we're getting somewhere... 997 00:54:12,480 --> 00:54:15,723 ...and under different circumstances this would probably work out. 998 00:54:15,880 --> 00:54:19,680 We'd probably be, you know, good pals. Like, see movies and, you know. 999 00:54:19,840 --> 00:54:22,081 - Yeah. TAMMY: - Like, find a hot tub or... 1000 00:54:22,240 --> 00:54:24,163 I have one at my apartment complex. 1001 00:54:24,960 --> 00:54:26,246 TAMMY: Oh, man. 1002 00:54:26,400 --> 00:54:28,448 Okay. That would be... 1003 00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:31,331 Fingers crossed we meet up again. 1004 00:54:32,160 --> 00:54:33,571 - Yeah. TAMMY: - All right. 1005 00:54:33,720 --> 00:54:35,802 Put a stack of pies for her, a stack for me. 1006 00:54:36,000 --> 00:54:38,765 - I think this is all of it. TAMMY: - Just get over there. 1007 00:54:38,960 --> 00:54:41,247 - Go. Don't walk right toward the gun. - Sorry. 1008 00:54:41,960 --> 00:54:43,485 TAMMY: Put pies in there. Put them in. 1009 00:54:43,640 --> 00:54:45,642 Don't creep up on me like that. 1010 00:54:45,840 --> 00:54:47,524 Larry, seriously. 1011 00:54:47,720 --> 00:54:49,848 - You like apple? TAMMY: - I do like apple. 1012 00:54:50,000 --> 00:54:53,482 But don't make me... I don't wanna have to choose between you. 1013 00:54:53,680 --> 00:54:55,125 Choose Larry. 1014 00:54:55,280 --> 00:54:59,080 TAMMY: Larry, she's telling me to take you out. 1015 00:54:59,240 --> 00:55:01,686 It's just, you're so much older, you know? 1016 00:55:01,840 --> 00:55:04,320 TAMMY: - Oh, my gosh. - I'm a veteran. 1017 00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:06,960 TAMMY: - That's amazing. BECKY: - Yeah. 1018 00:55:07,120 --> 00:55:09,202 TAMMY: I'm gonna have to put you in the cooler. 1019 00:55:09,360 --> 00:55:11,488 Come on, let's go. Today. Get your pies. 1020 00:55:11,640 --> 00:55:12,846 Let's go. 1021 00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:16,527 Larry, it's a real honor. I wanna thank you for your service. 1022 00:55:17,160 --> 00:55:18,446 Here. 1023 00:55:18,600 --> 00:55:21,922 Don't know if it's a blanket or a towel, but it'll keep you warm. 1024 00:55:22,080 --> 00:55:26,005 I'll call the cops in 10 minutes and let them know you're in here. 1025 00:55:31,960 --> 00:55:33,485 Damn it. 1026 00:55:36,120 --> 00:55:38,930 Shit. Come on. 1027 00:55:40,640 --> 00:55:42,404 Oh... 1028 00:55:42,920 --> 00:55:44,410 Come on. 1029 00:56:12,440 --> 00:56:17,321 Oh, God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 1030 00:56:17,480 --> 00:56:18,925 Oh. 1031 00:56:19,080 --> 00:56:20,241 Ow. 1032 00:56:20,400 --> 00:56:22,448 (TIRES SCREECHING) 1033 00:56:31,320 --> 00:56:33,004 Where do I go to bail somebody out? 1034 00:56:33,200 --> 00:56:34,406 CARTY: - Name? PEARL: - Tammy? 1035 00:56:35,640 --> 00:56:38,450 - Where have you been? - What? 1036 00:56:38,960 --> 00:56:42,362 - Uh, never mind. Yeah. - Okay. 1037 00:56:42,520 --> 00:56:43,601 Let's go. 1038 00:56:46,200 --> 00:56:49,602 - Well, slow down, slow down. - Okay, I'm sorry. Okay? 1039 00:56:49,800 --> 00:56:51,165 How did you even get out? 1040 00:56:51,320 --> 00:56:52,446 Well, I called Earl... 1041 00:56:52,600 --> 00:56:56,400 ...and he very generously had Bobby wire the bail money to the station. 1042 00:56:56,560 --> 00:56:58,210 - Really? - Mm-hm. 1043 00:57:00,560 --> 00:57:03,291 What are you doing with oxy? I mean, whose pills are those? 1044 00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:06,529 Well, they're mine. My foot was hurting... 1045 00:57:06,680 --> 00:57:11,288 ...and my pills weren't working, so I asked the Robinson boy if he had any. 1046 00:57:11,440 --> 00:57:13,920 - Eugene? Eugene's a drug dealer. PEARL: - Uh-huh. 1047 00:57:14,080 --> 00:57:15,684 Oh, no. 1048 00:57:15,840 --> 00:57:19,526 Yeah, he stands on the street and sells drugs in little sandwich bags. 1049 00:57:19,680 --> 00:57:22,095 - Did you think he was a pharmacist? PEARL: - He's organized. 1050 00:57:22,120 --> 00:57:23,645 TAMMY: Yeah, so was Hitler. 1051 00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:26,200 MAN: (ON TV) - -Courthouse grounds over the next two years... 1052 00:57:26,320 --> 00:57:28,243 ...and upgrade those grounds throughout. 1053 00:57:28,400 --> 00:57:31,529 In other news, there was a robbery at the Oaktree Topperjack's. 1054 00:57:31,680 --> 00:57:35,526 Two employees were held at gunpoint. Michelle Li joining us live at the scene. 1055 00:57:35,720 --> 00:57:36,721 Oh, shit. 1056 00:57:36,880 --> 00:57:40,885 Authorities are describing this person as 5'2", white, female. 1057 00:57:41,040 --> 00:57:45,489 The robber had a navy T-shin' featuring a bear with "Mahalo" written on it. 1058 00:57:45,640 --> 00:57:47,404 The robber was last seen driving... 1059 00:57:47,560 --> 00:57:50,404 ...an older-model Cadillac, hauling a Jet Ski. 1060 00:57:50,560 --> 00:57:53,006 The suspect made off with $1600... 1061 00:57:53,160 --> 00:57:55,925 - That's quite a coincidence. Huh? LI: - ...and 13 signature pies. 1062 00:57:56,880 --> 00:57:59,531 Yeah, and she was super bossy. 1063 00:57:59,680 --> 00:58:03,287 But she did give us pies, so that was cool. 1064 00:58:03,440 --> 00:58:05,120 LI: We're certainly glad that you're Sa... 1065 00:58:07,240 --> 00:58:09,083 What have you done? 1066 00:58:09,240 --> 00:58:12,210 Sit down. Right now. Sit down. 1067 00:58:14,560 --> 00:58:16,164 Well? 1068 00:58:16,920 --> 00:58:19,287 - Well, your feet were really puffy... - Yeah. 1069 00:58:19,440 --> 00:58:23,001 ...and they looked really messed up. 1070 00:58:23,160 --> 00:58:27,324 I didn't know how else to get that kind of money. 1071 00:58:28,320 --> 00:58:30,402 And I was afraid if I didn't get you out of there... 1072 00:58:30,560 --> 00:58:34,326 ...something bad was gonna happen to you. 1073 00:58:34,920 --> 00:58:39,050 And I just always screw stuff up, and I didn't wanna... 1074 00:58:39,760 --> 00:58:43,162 - I didn't wanna screw that up. - Oh, sweetie. 1075 00:58:43,320 --> 00:58:46,085 My sweet, sweet, sweet girl. Oh. 1076 00:58:46,240 --> 00:58:47,605 I'm sorry. 1077 00:58:51,000 --> 00:58:54,561 Look at me. You have to take that money back. 1078 00:58:54,720 --> 00:58:58,008 If you don't take it back, I'm gonna turn you in myself. 1079 00:59:00,520 --> 00:59:02,921 You gotta take the money back. 1080 00:59:03,480 --> 00:59:05,289 You gotta take the pies back. 1081 00:59:06,600 --> 00:59:07,761 All right? 1082 00:59:07,920 --> 00:59:09,922 I can't really take all the pies back. 1083 00:59:10,080 --> 00:59:11,684 Why not? 1084 00:59:11,840 --> 00:59:13,365 Oh, okay. 1085 00:59:13,520 --> 00:59:16,808 - I kind of got into them. - Okay. 1086 00:59:18,560 --> 00:59:20,608 You're more bad-ass than I ever thought. 1087 00:59:22,760 --> 00:59:25,331 I think you take after your grandma after all. 1088 00:59:25,680 --> 00:59:27,170 Hmm? 1089 00:59:27,800 --> 00:59:29,609 All right. 1090 00:59:29,760 --> 00:59:31,205 - We'll fix it tomorrow. - Yeah. 1091 00:59:31,360 --> 00:59:33,089 We'll fix it. 1092 00:59:39,000 --> 00:59:40,081 - I'm not. - Yes, you are. 1093 00:59:40,240 --> 00:59:42,163 - I'm not wearing it. - I just made it for you. 1094 00:59:42,320 --> 00:59:44,209 It's full of grease. Look at this. 1095 00:59:44,360 --> 00:59:48,365 - Can you put it on before someone sees us? - You realize how much it clogs your veins... 1096 00:59:48,560 --> 00:59:50,722 TAMMY: - Put it on. You're killing me. - All right. 1097 00:59:50,880 --> 00:59:52,689 TAMMY: You have to argue about everything. 1098 00:59:52,840 --> 00:59:54,968 PEARL: Oh, that's kind of calming, actually. 1099 00:59:57,000 --> 00:59:59,890 Just throw the money through the window and we'll get out of here. 1100 01:00:00,040 --> 01:00:03,169 TAMMY: All right. Fine. Here we go. 1101 01:00:06,320 --> 01:00:07,321 (SCREAMS) 1102 01:00:07,480 --> 01:00:11,041 TAMMY: - Oh, God. No, I'm returning it. PEARL: - She's returning the money. 1103 01:00:11,200 --> 01:00:14,283 TAMMY: - I'm returning the money to you. - I'm calling the police. 1104 01:00:14,440 --> 01:00:17,011 Oh, no. We're gonna need more pies. 1105 01:00:17,160 --> 01:00:19,766 TAMMY: I'm not robbing you. I'm giving it back. 1106 01:00:19,920 --> 01:00:22,685 God, stop freaking out. Stop crying. 1107 01:00:22,840 --> 01:00:25,411 I'm returning this to you. 1108 01:00:25,600 --> 01:00:29,161 PEARL: Listen carefully. Keep the car running. 1109 01:00:34,400 --> 01:00:37,563 No, just relax. It's okay. Everything's normal. It's cool. 1110 01:00:37,720 --> 01:00:41,088 My, uh, bandit partner, she just accidentally robbed you last night. 1111 01:00:41,280 --> 01:00:42,691 She didn't really mean it. 1112 01:00:42,840 --> 01:00:45,411 And here's the money back. No hard feelings. 1113 01:00:45,560 --> 01:00:46,766 Are you the grandma? 1114 01:00:49,520 --> 01:00:51,124 PEARL: Look right here. 1115 01:00:51,280 --> 01:00:54,489 None of this happened. None of this happened. 1116 01:00:55,520 --> 01:00:58,922 Just relax. None of this happened. 1117 01:00:59,080 --> 01:01:00,889 Oh. What are you doing? 1118 01:01:01,040 --> 01:01:03,850 TAMMY: - You said "Come a-running." PEARL: - I said "Keep the car running." 1119 01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:06,920 TAMMY: - You need to be more articulate. PEARL: - I have a bag on my head. 1120 01:01:07,040 --> 01:01:10,601 And by the way, why does mine have no expression and yours has a smiley face? 1121 01:01:10,760 --> 01:01:12,922 TAMMY: It's not smiling. I'm showing tiger teeth. 1122 01:01:13,080 --> 01:01:15,242 PEARL: Oh, I thought it was a mustache and a smile. 1123 01:01:15,440 --> 01:01:18,091 TAMMY: - Just go. Go, go. PEARL: - Come on, let's get out of here. 1124 01:01:18,240 --> 01:01:20,322 TAMMY: Don't be a hero! 1125 01:01:21,320 --> 01:01:24,290 - Hey. TAMMY: - Hey. Where's Larry? 1126 01:01:24,440 --> 01:01:27,842 - He has the day off. He's pretty shaken up. TAMMY: - Oh. 1127 01:01:28,000 --> 01:01:29,240 Just tell him hi. 1128 01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:30,481 Okay. 1129 01:01:33,520 --> 01:01:35,124 TAMMY: Watch the curb, watch the curb. 1130 01:01:35,280 --> 01:01:36,930 (KATHLEEN SOBBING) 1131 01:01:37,080 --> 01:01:40,050 Oh, Jesus, she's crying up a storm. Somebody go hug her. 1132 01:01:40,200 --> 01:01:41,884 It's okay, Kathleen. 1133 01:01:42,040 --> 01:01:44,042 (BOTH LAUGHING) 1134 01:01:45,040 --> 01:01:46,929 TAMMY: Oh, my God! Ha-ha-ha. 1135 01:01:48,040 --> 01:01:50,042 (BOTH CHUCKLING) 1136 01:01:52,720 --> 01:01:54,927 Niagara Falls, here we come! 1137 01:01:55,080 --> 01:01:58,641 Not in this car. We're gonna go down straight and then take a right. 1138 01:01:58,800 --> 01:02:00,484 - What? - Yeah. 1139 01:02:13,320 --> 01:02:15,766 PEARL: Oh, Lenore. 1140 01:02:15,960 --> 01:02:18,611 - Hey. - Hey. It's been too long. 1141 01:02:18,760 --> 01:02:20,842 PEARL: Too long. Sweetie, you look so great. 1142 01:02:21,000 --> 01:02:23,844 Aw. It's great to see you. 1143 01:02:24,000 --> 01:02:26,606 PEARL: - Come here. - Aw. Is this little Tammy? 1144 01:02:26,800 --> 01:02:29,167 Look at you. 1145 01:02:29,320 --> 01:02:34,167 Oh. Darling, last time I saw you, you were knee-high to a grasshopper. 1146 01:02:34,320 --> 01:02:36,891 - Yeah, I'm taller. LENORE: - Yes, you are. 1147 01:02:37,040 --> 01:02:39,042 - You don't remember me, do you? - No, I do. 1148 01:02:39,200 --> 01:02:41,441 - You wanna see some ID? Family album? TAMMY: - Ha, ha. 1149 01:02:41,600 --> 01:02:43,489 - She got a sense of humor? - Yes. Sometimes. 1150 01:02:43,640 --> 01:02:46,371 - Oh, darling. How's your mom? TAMMY: - Good, I think. 1151 01:02:46,520 --> 01:02:49,410 You know, not real thrilled with us at the moment. 1152 01:02:49,560 --> 01:02:51,369 Yeah, Pearly filled me in. 1153 01:02:51,520 --> 01:02:53,329 You knocked over a Topperjack's? 1154 01:02:53,480 --> 01:02:56,848 - Grandma. - Lenore's cool. 1155 01:02:57,040 --> 01:02:59,646 That the vehicle you perpetrated your crime with? 1156 01:03:00,400 --> 01:03:01,811 TAMMY: - Yeah. LENORE: - Okay. 1157 01:03:02,000 --> 01:03:05,209 This is what we're gonna do. Get in there and take everything out. 1158 01:03:05,360 --> 01:03:07,931 Clean everything out of it, all the evidence, okay? 1159 01:03:08,080 --> 01:03:09,286 You're on the lam. 1160 01:03:09,440 --> 01:03:12,205 You're a fugitive from justice. Think about it that way. 1161 01:03:12,360 --> 01:03:14,249 - Jesus. - And we'll pull that trailer off. 1162 01:03:14,400 --> 01:03:17,529 - And I'll pop those plates, okay? - Okay, what do you want me to do? 1163 01:03:17,680 --> 01:03:21,401 Oh, honey, why don't you hunker on back down there in that RV, put your feet up? 1164 01:03:21,560 --> 01:03:23,449 - I got this covered. - Okay. 1165 01:03:23,600 --> 01:03:25,682 - Alrighty. - All right. 1166 01:03:25,840 --> 01:03:26,841 Ow. 1167 01:03:29,560 --> 01:03:31,210 Four dollars a gallon. 1168 01:03:31,360 --> 01:03:34,409 Thanks, Obamacare. Ugh. 1169 01:03:34,560 --> 01:03:37,211 - I don't think this is such a good idea. LENORE: - I do. 1170 01:03:37,360 --> 01:03:39,761 You wanna go to prison for robbing a store? 1171 01:03:39,960 --> 01:03:42,201 Well, I returned the money. 1172 01:03:42,360 --> 01:03:44,010 Well, I'm not a lawyer... 1173 01:03:44,160 --> 01:03:47,801 ...but I don't think you want the police getting ahold of this car. 1174 01:03:47,960 --> 01:03:49,405 (GRUNTS) 1175 01:03:51,520 --> 01:03:53,284 TAMMY: Shit. 1176 01:03:55,760 --> 01:03:58,286 I wouldn't stand there if I was you. 1177 01:03:58,440 --> 01:04:00,124 Oh, man. 1178 01:04:00,560 --> 01:04:02,085 (TAMMY CHUCKLES) 1179 01:04:02,240 --> 01:04:03,765 Oh, my God. 1180 01:04:03,920 --> 01:04:05,888 LENORE: - Buckle up. - Oh, my God. 1181 01:04:10,880 --> 01:04:12,689 Oh, holy shit. 1182 01:04:38,240 --> 01:04:42,882 Oh, I am so happy every time I come here. 1183 01:04:44,280 --> 01:04:46,044 Susanne. 1184 01:04:46,200 --> 01:04:48,601 - Hi. - Hi, Pearly. 1185 01:04:48,760 --> 01:04:50,285 PEARL: Oh, it's so good to see you. 1186 01:04:50,440 --> 01:04:52,044 So good to see you. 1187 01:04:52,240 --> 01:04:53,287 Isn't that precious? 1188 01:04:53,440 --> 01:04:54,441 Yes, I do remember you. 1189 01:04:54,600 --> 01:04:56,520 SUSANNE: Hey, Tammy. I haven't seen you in ages. 1190 01:04:56,600 --> 01:04:58,489 - Welcome, welcome. - Thanks. 1191 01:04:58,640 --> 01:05:02,087 - Holy shit, you guys are loaded. - Tammy, that is so rude. 1192 01:05:02,240 --> 01:05:05,767 Oh, what? This is like Falcon Crest shit and stuff. 1193 01:05:05,960 --> 01:05:07,689 I thought you owned a pet food store. 1194 01:05:07,880 --> 01:05:09,928 Yeah, well, I own 22 of them. 1195 01:05:10,080 --> 01:05:11,241 - No. - Yeah. 1196 01:05:11,400 --> 01:05:14,722 - Wasn't it, like, Martha's or Mabel's? - Merlin's. 1197 01:05:14,880 --> 01:05:17,326 TAMMY: - Why Merlin's? - Because I dig wizards, man. 1198 01:05:17,480 --> 01:05:20,324 - Oh, my God, I do too. I love wizards. - Get out of town. 1199 01:05:20,480 --> 01:05:23,370 I like them because they can blow shit up with their fingers. 1200 01:05:23,560 --> 01:05:27,087 SUSANNE: Tammy, have you ever been to a lesbian Fourth of July party? 1201 01:05:27,240 --> 01:05:30,200 TAMMY: - Not that I know of. SUSANNE: - Well, they are fun. Come on, Penny. 1202 01:05:30,840 --> 01:05:34,083 LENORE: So let's hear this again. I'm fascinated. 1203 01:05:34,280 --> 01:05:35,850 I just... I meant it... 1204 01:05:36,000 --> 01:05:39,766 I meant it as a compliment. I said you were super hot. 1205 01:05:39,920 --> 01:05:41,649 You know what I mean. 1206 01:05:41,800 --> 01:05:43,802 When I think of what a lesbian looks like... 1207 01:05:44,000 --> 01:05:47,129 ...I think of somebody who looks more like... - Like me? 1208 01:05:48,120 --> 01:05:51,283 - Ha, ha. - Personally, I prefer the term "labisian." 1209 01:05:51,440 --> 01:05:52,930 (ALL CHUCKLE) 1210 01:05:53,080 --> 01:05:55,481 - We should talk about that shirt. - Yeah, okay. 1211 01:05:55,640 --> 01:05:58,769 - I love this shirt. - I know, but it's time to give it a little break. 1212 01:05:58,920 --> 01:06:02,215 - What are we gonna do for the party? - Please don't wear that shirt to the party. 1213 01:06:02,240 --> 01:06:03,924 Uh-oh. You're gonna doll me up... 1214 01:06:04,080 --> 01:06:07,209 ...and then I'm gonna have to be beating the ladies off with a lesbian stick. 1215 01:06:07,680 --> 01:06:09,569 (LAUGHING) 1216 01:06:11,640 --> 01:06:14,849 (OVER SPEAKERS) ♪ This is the time 1217 01:06:15,760 --> 01:06:18,843 ♪ This is the time ♪ Now it's time to go 1218 01:06:19,640 --> 01:06:23,964 PEARL: Mm. There you are. Look at you. Oh, my gosh. Wow. 1219 01:06:24,160 --> 01:06:26,561 You look so softened. 1220 01:06:26,760 --> 01:06:30,481 Oh. I don't know. Susanne made me put on Lenore's shirt. 1221 01:06:30,640 --> 01:06:33,041 It actually looks better on you than her. 1222 01:06:33,200 --> 01:06:35,646 Look at you. Oh, my gosh. 1223 01:06:36,520 --> 01:06:38,045 So nice. 1224 01:06:38,920 --> 01:06:40,729 Well, thanks. 1225 01:06:40,880 --> 01:06:42,405 Hey, I don't wanna be a bummer... 1226 01:06:42,600 --> 01:06:45,922 ...but I just wanna say something in a super-loving way... 1227 01:06:46,080 --> 01:06:48,048 ...but could you not get shithouse tonight? 1228 01:06:49,520 --> 01:06:52,967 Oh. Sure. Easy-peasy. 1229 01:06:53,760 --> 01:06:55,364 - I mean it. PEARL: - Okay. 1230 01:06:55,520 --> 01:06:58,410 - So you wanna dance? - No, they'll probably think we're a couple. 1231 01:06:58,560 --> 01:07:01,040 - Oh, it's too late for that. Ha, ha. Come on. TAMMY: - Ha, ha. 1232 01:07:01,200 --> 01:07:03,407 - Look at you. I love it. - Really? 1233 01:07:03,560 --> 01:07:05,562 (DANCE MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS) 1234 01:07:09,320 --> 01:07:11,971 (OVER SPEAKERS) ♪ I can't do nothin, girl ♪ Without somebody gawkin' 1235 01:07:12,120 --> 01:07:15,124 ♪ I used to think that it was me ♪ But now I see it wasn't 1236 01:07:15,320 --> 01:07:17,766 (WHISPERS) Pearly! Pearly! Pearly! 1237 01:07:18,360 --> 01:07:21,887 - Oh, I need your help with something. - Is something hurting? 1238 01:07:22,040 --> 01:07:25,089 No, no, no. Oh, my gosh, you're a little sweaty, huh? 1239 01:07:25,240 --> 01:07:27,971 - I'm killing it on the dance floor. - I know, you're dancing hard. 1240 01:07:28,120 --> 01:07:30,122 Well, let's just try to glow less. 1241 01:07:31,080 --> 01:07:32,809 (IN NORMAL VOICE) Cool off. Oh, my goodness. 1242 01:07:32,960 --> 01:07:34,962 Look who it is. 1243 01:07:36,160 --> 01:07:37,969 Hey, Tammy. 1244 01:07:38,120 --> 01:07:40,771 - What are you guys doing here? - Pearl invited us. 1245 01:07:40,920 --> 01:07:44,447 Pearly, where's the dance floor and the bar? Not in that order. 1246 01:07:44,600 --> 01:07:46,329 PEARL: - This way, baby. TAMMY: - Grandma. 1247 01:07:46,480 --> 01:07:49,165 - Sweetie, have fun. Bye. - See you later, son. 1248 01:07:51,720 --> 01:07:53,449 Well, that was fast. 1249 01:07:53,600 --> 01:07:57,924 I gotta say, your mom and dad have gotta have a real weird setup... 1250 01:07:58,080 --> 01:07:59,923 ...because I don't get it. - Heh. 1251 01:08:00,760 --> 01:08:03,525 They've actually been separated for a long time. 1252 01:08:03,720 --> 01:08:05,882 And she's been sick for quite a while... 1253 01:08:06,040 --> 01:08:08,805 ...and he still takes care of her... 1254 01:08:08,960 --> 01:08:11,088 ...so it's kind of complicated. 1255 01:08:11,240 --> 01:08:13,811 Yeah. It's probably complicated. 1256 01:08:13,960 --> 01:08:17,681 - Anyway... - Kind of spiffed up, aren't you? 1257 01:08:19,160 --> 01:08:22,209 I just put on, like, a shirt and pants. I'm not... 1258 01:08:22,360 --> 01:08:24,010 Maybe a little aftershave? 1259 01:08:24,200 --> 01:08:27,010 Is that what I'm kind of smelling? 1260 01:08:27,200 --> 01:08:29,282 I put on some cologne. 1261 01:08:29,440 --> 01:08:34,207 - You put on man perfume to come and see me? - No, I didn't put on ma... 1262 01:08:34,360 --> 01:08:35,521 TAMMY: Hmm? Ha, ha. 1263 01:08:35,680 --> 01:08:38,160 - I think you did. BOBBY: - Come on. I'm gonna get you a drink. 1264 01:08:38,320 --> 01:08:41,563 It's kind of a vanilla. Like a little... 1265 01:08:41,760 --> 01:08:43,762 It's not vanilla, it's regular. It's just... 1266 01:08:43,920 --> 01:08:45,410 TAMMY: - I don't know. - Come on. 1267 01:08:45,560 --> 01:08:48,325 I know. I know what it is. You smell like a cookie. 1268 01:08:48,480 --> 01:08:50,084 Shut up. I don't smell like a cookie. 1269 01:08:50,240 --> 01:08:51,730 TAMMY: - I think you do. BOBBY: - Come on. 1270 01:08:51,880 --> 01:08:53,723 (OVER SPEAKERS) ♪ Now you shouldn't even get into 1271 01:08:53,880 --> 01:08:55,644 Yeah. Oh. 1272 01:08:55,800 --> 01:08:59,850 Oh. Oh, oh, oh. 1273 01:09:00,000 --> 01:09:01,809 Yeah. 1274 01:09:03,600 --> 01:09:05,967 (KOOL & THE GANG'S "GET DOWN ON IT" PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS) 1275 01:09:06,160 --> 01:09:07,525 (BOBBY CHUCKLING) 1276 01:09:07,680 --> 01:09:09,720 ♪ How you gonna do it ♪ If you really don't wanna dance? 1277 01:09:09,840 --> 01:09:11,490 - Does that smell weird? - No. 1278 01:09:11,640 --> 01:09:12,687 (TAMMY CHUCKLES) 1279 01:09:12,840 --> 01:09:15,081 - I told you. - Oh! You made me smell it. 1280 01:09:15,240 --> 01:09:16,730 - I told you. - Why did I do that? 1281 01:09:16,920 --> 01:09:20,686 Because I told you, if somebody says, "Does this smell weird?"... 1282 01:09:20,880 --> 01:09:23,451 - I don't wanna hit anybody. - What was that? 1283 01:09:23,600 --> 01:09:26,331 It's a dog cookie. Ha, ha. I mean, a dog biscuit. 1284 01:09:26,480 --> 01:09:29,051 You tricked me, Tammy. 1285 01:09:29,200 --> 01:09:30,884 It's because I'm tricky. 1286 01:09:32,280 --> 01:09:35,682 I actually don't think you're tricky. You're kind of a straightforward person. 1287 01:09:35,840 --> 01:09:38,491 It's one of the things I like about you a lot. 1288 01:09:38,920 --> 01:09:40,365 Oh. 1289 01:09:50,680 --> 01:09:53,081 Thanks for bailing my grandma out. 1290 01:09:53,240 --> 01:09:54,730 It was really nice. 1291 01:09:54,880 --> 01:09:57,281 Of course. But, I mean, anybody would have done it. 1292 01:09:58,520 --> 01:10:00,682 No, not really. 1293 01:10:00,880 --> 01:10:02,882 They wouldn't have. So it was... 1294 01:10:03,040 --> 01:10:04,246 Thanks. 1295 01:10:05,360 --> 01:10:07,089 Thanks. 1296 01:10:07,720 --> 01:10:09,085 Well, I'm glad I could help. 1297 01:10:13,680 --> 01:10:16,126 - I like your hair like this, by the way. It's nice. - Oh. 1298 01:10:16,280 --> 01:10:20,046 I don't know. Susanne did this weird clampy thing. 1299 01:10:20,200 --> 01:10:21,884 No, it's pretty. 1300 01:10:22,040 --> 01:10:24,168 You look really pretty. 1301 01:10:24,640 --> 01:10:25,971 Thanks. 1302 01:10:33,320 --> 01:10:35,891 I know this is stupid, but I'm still married. 1303 01:10:37,440 --> 01:10:41,684 And it's a shitty marriage... 1304 01:10:43,080 --> 01:10:46,368 ...and it's over, but it wasn't all Greg's fault. 1305 01:10:46,520 --> 01:10:48,602 I was kind of an awful wife. 1306 01:10:49,800 --> 01:10:54,328 - You know, I just don't wanna add to the... - No, it's okay. 1307 01:10:54,520 --> 01:10:56,887 - It's, you know... I'm sorry. - No. Don't. 1308 01:10:57,040 --> 01:10:59,327 You're right. I didn't mean to, you know... 1309 01:10:59,520 --> 01:11:00,931 Anyway. 1310 01:11:03,640 --> 01:11:05,404 You know, I get it. 1311 01:11:05,560 --> 01:11:09,804 You know, you get a little taste of Tammy, and then you... 1312 01:11:09,960 --> 01:11:12,611 ...kind of come clamoring back for more. 1313 01:11:12,760 --> 01:11:14,808 - You get it? Really? Ha, ha. - Yeah. 1314 01:11:14,960 --> 01:11:17,611 I'm like a Cheeto. You can't eat just one. 1315 01:11:18,120 --> 01:11:20,122 (BOTH CHUCKLE) 1316 01:11:20,280 --> 01:11:23,090 Tammy, that's Lay's potato chips. That's not Cheetos. 1317 01:11:23,240 --> 01:11:25,686 No, not for me. I love a Cheeto. 1318 01:11:25,880 --> 01:11:27,644 Tammy, Bobby. Come on, you two. 1319 01:11:27,840 --> 01:11:30,081 You're gonna wanna see this. Come on. 1320 01:11:30,240 --> 01:11:31,969 - Oh, all right. - Okay. 1321 01:11:32,120 --> 01:11:34,361 SUSANNE: - Come on. Chop-chop. TAMMY: - We're coming. 1322 01:11:34,560 --> 01:11:36,642 Get your asses down here. 1323 01:11:36,800 --> 01:11:38,723 TAMMY: Hey, what did you do with the Jet Ski? 1324 01:11:38,880 --> 01:11:40,962 LENORE: Viking burial. It's trashed. 1325 01:11:41,120 --> 01:11:42,485 Viking burial. 1326 01:11:42,800 --> 01:11:45,121 ALL: Viking burial! 1327 01:11:45,320 --> 01:11:48,005 (CROWD CHEERING AND APPLAUDING) 1328 01:11:51,520 --> 01:11:55,445 Okay. Would you like to do the honors? It's your craft. 1329 01:11:55,600 --> 01:11:58,080 Yeah, but you love blowing shit up, so... 1330 01:11:58,240 --> 01:12:00,766 Yeah, I do. God help me, I do so love it. 1331 01:12:00,960 --> 01:12:02,166 - Go, baby. - Get on, Lenore. 1332 01:12:02,320 --> 01:12:03,731 The tribe has spoken. 1333 01:12:03,920 --> 01:12:06,127 Although we did not have the opportunity... 1334 01:12:06,280 --> 01:12:09,887 ...to feel your mighty engines thrum between our thighs... 1335 01:12:10,040 --> 01:12:13,442 ...we salute your watery prowess... 1336 01:12:13,640 --> 01:12:16,041 ...and we commend your spirit to Valhalla. 1337 01:12:16,720 --> 01:12:20,122 - Valhalla! ALL: - Valhalla! 1338 01:12:20,280 --> 01:12:21,486 (CROWD CHEERING) 1339 01:12:21,880 --> 01:12:23,689 SUSANNE: Go, baby. Go, baby. Go, baby. 1340 01:12:23,840 --> 01:12:24,887 (ALL CHEERING) 1341 01:12:33,240 --> 01:12:35,811 LENORE: - Viking burial! TAMMY: - Viking! 1342 01:12:35,960 --> 01:12:38,361 Viking burial! 1343 01:12:40,320 --> 01:12:43,529 PEARL: Oh, lesbians! Attention, everybody. 1344 01:12:43,680 --> 01:12:46,047 - Oh, shit, Grandma. PEARL: - Hi, my name is Pearl Balzen. 1345 01:12:46,200 --> 01:12:47,361 Excuse me. 1346 01:12:47,520 --> 01:12:51,809 And I wanna take this opportunity to thank my cousin Lenore... 1347 01:12:52,360 --> 01:12:56,206 ...and the beautiful Susanne for this kick-ass party. 1348 01:12:56,360 --> 01:12:59,443 Yeah! Yeah. 1349 01:12:59,640 --> 01:13:02,007 Mm, mm, mm. 1350 01:13:02,160 --> 01:13:05,482 And I just wanna say happy Fourth of July! 1351 01:13:05,680 --> 01:13:07,364 (PEARL & CROWD CHEERING) 1352 01:13:07,520 --> 01:13:09,124 Amen, Pearl. Amen. 1353 01:13:09,320 --> 01:13:11,800 All right, enough of that. Seriously, folks. 1354 01:13:11,960 --> 01:13:14,850 I wanna give a little birthday gift to America. 1355 01:13:15,000 --> 01:13:18,129 I don't know how old America is right now, but I just wanna say... 1356 01:13:19,200 --> 01:13:21,487 ...happy birthday, America. 1357 01:13:21,640 --> 01:13:23,165 - Beep. - Shit. 1358 01:13:23,320 --> 01:13:24,845 (CROWD CHEERING) 1359 01:13:25,040 --> 01:13:27,202 WOMAN: - Do it again! - Yes. 1360 01:13:29,280 --> 01:13:32,124 - Those are beauties. Really beauties. TAMMY: - Let's go. You're done. 1361 01:13:32,280 --> 01:13:33,486 You're done. You're drunk. 1362 01:13:33,640 --> 01:13:36,405 What the fuck did you do? Go get me another drink right now. 1363 01:13:36,560 --> 01:13:38,210 You said you weren't gonna drink. 1364 01:13:38,360 --> 01:13:40,601 I said I wasn't gonna drink. Get me a drink. Come on. 1365 01:13:40,760 --> 01:13:44,526 May I introduce my granddaughter, Hamburger? What are you doing? 1366 01:13:44,680 --> 01:13:48,287 Cheeseburger, sorry. She's actually Cheeseburger. 1367 01:13:48,480 --> 01:13:51,165 Hey, hey, hey. What? What? 1368 01:13:51,360 --> 01:13:53,295 - Don't tell me what to do. - Just get off the... 1369 01:13:53,320 --> 01:13:55,687 I don't want some fat loser telling me what to do. 1370 01:13:56,960 --> 01:14:00,169 You're just being an asshole because you're drunk, and it's not okay. 1371 01:14:00,320 --> 01:14:01,731 Hey, we're all drunk, Tammy. 1372 01:14:01,880 --> 01:14:04,240 - She didn't mean anything by it. - I absolutely do mean it. 1373 01:14:04,360 --> 01:14:06,761 I totally understand. I don't blame Greg. 1374 01:14:06,960 --> 01:14:10,248 I would leave her too. I mean, I wouldn't want anything to do with her. 1375 01:14:10,400 --> 01:14:13,370 Look at her. Come on, everybody, people. Oh... 1376 01:14:13,520 --> 01:14:16,251 Look at that. Ugh. What? 1377 01:14:17,840 --> 01:14:18,887 What? 1378 01:14:19,040 --> 01:14:21,771 At least I didn't try to fuck my daughter's husband. 1379 01:14:23,040 --> 01:14:25,122 - How'd you know about that? TAMMY: - Fuck you. 1380 01:14:25,280 --> 01:14:26,281 What? 1381 01:14:26,960 --> 01:14:29,008 - Always something with her. TAMMY: - You fucking drunk. 1382 01:14:29,160 --> 01:14:32,960 LENORE: - Okay. We're having fun. - All right, let's get the party going. 1383 01:14:33,120 --> 01:14:35,964 - Why's everybody being so quiet? LENORE: - We gotta go. Here we go. 1384 01:14:36,120 --> 01:14:39,727 What? What? All right. What did I say? What did I say? 1385 01:14:39,880 --> 01:14:42,645 Thank you, Sanne, everybody. Whoa. 1386 01:14:42,800 --> 01:14:43,881 (PEARL LAUGHS) 1387 01:14:48,000 --> 01:14:49,161 LENORE: There you are. 1388 01:14:49,320 --> 01:14:52,847 I've been looking all over creation for you. 1389 01:14:56,960 --> 01:14:59,440 Quite a show you two put on. 1390 01:15:00,880 --> 01:15:02,609 I didn't start anything. 1391 01:15:02,760 --> 01:15:05,889 Well, you sure finished it, though, didn't you? 1392 01:15:07,360 --> 01:15:11,126 What was I supposed to do? Just stand there while she said shitty things to me? 1393 01:15:11,280 --> 01:15:14,170 - It's not fair. - What the hell does fair have to do with it? 1394 01:15:14,800 --> 01:15:16,643 I got a big news flash for you, Tammy. 1395 01:15:16,800 --> 01:15:20,566 Life isn't fair. You're gonna have to scrape and claw for everything you want... 1396 01:15:20,720 --> 01:15:22,449 ...just like the rest of us. 1397 01:15:22,600 --> 01:15:26,889 You know, for years you've been bellyaching and complaining about how your life sucks... 1398 01:15:27,080 --> 01:15:30,004 ...but you haven't done one single thing to make it better. 1399 01:15:30,160 --> 01:15:32,003 It isn't magic, you know. 1400 01:15:32,160 --> 01:15:35,289 You can't just bitch and moan and expect shit to change. 1401 01:15:35,440 --> 01:15:37,602 You think this house just fell on my head one day? 1402 01:15:37,800 --> 01:15:39,928 I had to work hard. 1403 01:15:40,080 --> 01:15:43,846 You know, gay hasn't always been in fashion, my friend. 1404 01:15:44,280 --> 01:15:46,203 Susanne and I... 1405 01:15:49,120 --> 01:15:52,090 If you had any idea how hard we had to work... 1406 01:15:54,360 --> 01:15:57,489 We didn't have anything handed to us. 1407 01:15:59,560 --> 01:16:01,608 You need to grow up, honey. 1408 01:16:02,400 --> 01:16:04,971 You don't know anything about me. 1409 01:16:05,160 --> 01:16:07,083 You're not that mysterious. 1410 01:16:07,880 --> 01:16:09,450 Dogs are mysterious. 1411 01:16:09,600 --> 01:16:11,762 Ooh. Cats. 1412 01:16:11,960 --> 01:16:13,200 Birds. 1413 01:16:13,360 --> 01:16:15,362 Fish. Fish are the most mysterious. 1414 01:16:16,040 --> 01:16:18,202 And I've made a mint, thank you, Jesus. 1415 01:16:20,640 --> 01:16:22,404 But we're not mysterious. 1416 01:16:23,240 --> 01:16:24,401 Look, you know... 1417 01:16:24,560 --> 01:16:28,201 ...she shouldn't have said all those ugly things. I agree with you. 1418 01:16:28,360 --> 01:16:30,283 But she's drunk. 1419 01:16:30,480 --> 01:16:32,562 She won't remember it tomorrow. 1420 01:16:32,720 --> 01:16:34,165 Yeah, she's always drunk. 1421 01:16:34,320 --> 01:16:35,845 She's an alcoholic, Tammy. 1422 01:16:37,000 --> 01:16:38,081 She's sick. 1423 01:16:38,280 --> 01:16:41,250 You need to focus on getting your shit together. 1424 01:16:41,400 --> 01:16:46,804 Why don't you figure out what it is that you really want and just go after it? 1425 01:16:47,480 --> 01:16:49,323 Maybe you can help her out. 1426 01:16:53,560 --> 01:16:55,801 I'm gonna go blow up some fireworks. 1427 01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:57,081 (LENORE CLICKS TONGUE) 1428 01:17:00,400 --> 01:17:02,209 (SINGING) Suzanne 1429 01:17:02,360 --> 01:17:07,161 Takes you down to that place by the river 1430 01:17:07,320 --> 01:17:09,368 Suzanne 1431 01:17:16,040 --> 01:17:17,246 BOBBY: - Hey. - Oh! 1432 01:17:17,440 --> 01:17:18,851 - Oh, God. - Oh. Oh, I'm sorry. 1433 01:17:19,000 --> 01:17:23,767 - Why you coming at me, like, out of the dark? - I was... I'm sorry, I was just checking on you. 1434 01:17:23,920 --> 01:17:26,000 It looked like you were having a hard time out there. 1435 01:17:26,160 --> 01:17:27,286 Oh. 1436 01:17:27,440 --> 01:17:30,922 She kind of told me I was an asshole and to get my shit together. 1437 01:17:31,120 --> 01:17:32,610 Jesus, that's a little harsh. 1438 01:17:32,760 --> 01:17:35,366 I'm not so sure that she wasn't right. 1439 01:17:35,520 --> 01:17:40,651 Can't exactly keep complaining about my life and not doing anything about it. 1440 01:17:40,840 --> 01:17:43,650 Yeah, but you had a hard night with your grandma and everything. 1441 01:17:43,840 --> 01:17:45,888 - Yeah, that was great. - Yeah. 1442 01:17:46,040 --> 01:17:51,729 Heh. I don't know. I'm the one that let her walk off to the bar with Earl. I don't know. 1443 01:17:51,880 --> 01:17:54,963 I shouldn't have brought Earl here. I knew it. 1444 01:17:55,120 --> 01:17:56,360 But I wanted to see you. 1445 01:17:57,800 --> 01:18:01,407 Heh. Yeah, because I'm such a great catch. 1446 01:18:01,960 --> 01:18:03,530 No, it's not that you're a catch. 1447 01:18:03,680 --> 01:18:05,682 I mean, I'm not saying you're not a catch. 1448 01:18:05,840 --> 01:18:10,243 Just, you know, my life's boring, and you're a very not-boring person. 1449 01:18:10,400 --> 01:18:12,880 And, you know, I... It's... 1450 01:18:13,080 --> 01:18:17,642 Wow. You're kind of super bad at compliments. 1451 01:18:17,800 --> 01:18:20,690 Like, it's kind of amazing, really. 1452 01:18:20,880 --> 01:18:26,808 I'm doing my best, but I think you know what I meant. 1453 01:18:26,960 --> 01:18:28,246 I know what you meant. 1454 01:18:30,080 --> 01:18:34,847 I don't know. I don't really think that now... 1455 01:18:35,320 --> 01:18:40,281 ...is kind of a great moment for either one of... You know. 1456 01:18:40,480 --> 01:18:43,723 You've got your dad you're chasing after. 1457 01:18:43,880 --> 01:18:45,962 And I don't even have a car... 1458 01:18:47,880 --> 01:18:49,928 ...or, you know, a job. 1459 01:18:52,800 --> 01:18:55,770 You know, I don't think... 1460 01:18:55,920 --> 01:19:00,448 ...that putting two messes together is gonna somehow... 1461 01:19:00,600 --> 01:19:02,762 ...make an unmess, you know? 1462 01:19:04,280 --> 01:19:06,328 I guess I just think you're wrong. 1463 01:19:09,480 --> 01:19:11,642 Probably. 1464 01:19:11,800 --> 01:19:14,246 I usually am. 1465 01:19:15,680 --> 01:19:17,967 Well... 1466 01:19:18,120 --> 01:19:20,202 ...I should probably get out of here... 1467 01:19:20,400 --> 01:19:23,244 ...because my dad is now starting... 1468 01:19:23,440 --> 01:19:25,727 ...to flash his breasts to the lesbians. 1469 01:19:27,160 --> 01:19:30,482 Huh. Oh, God. Yeah. 1470 01:19:30,640 --> 01:19:34,850 - That's probably your cue. - So... Yeah. 1471 01:19:35,680 --> 01:19:39,480 - I guess we're goodbye-ing again. - Yeah. 1472 01:19:41,240 --> 01:19:42,401 (TAMMY CHUCKLES) 1473 01:19:42,560 --> 01:19:46,610 - Just wanted to mix things up a little. BOBBY: - All right. 1474 01:19:46,800 --> 01:19:48,802 (FIREWORKS POPPING) 1475 01:19:51,080 --> 01:19:53,128 I still think you're wrong, I gotta say. 1476 01:19:54,960 --> 01:19:59,170 I can't hear you. Lenore's blowing shit up. 1477 01:20:00,200 --> 01:20:02,202 (CROWD CHATTERING) 1478 01:20:14,960 --> 01:20:16,200 - Morning. - Morning. 1479 01:20:16,360 --> 01:20:17,691 Morning. 1480 01:20:17,840 --> 01:20:19,330 Quite a party, huh? 1481 01:20:19,480 --> 01:20:21,164 'Twas, indeed. 1482 01:20:21,320 --> 01:20:23,322 Oh. I'll get in on that. 1483 01:20:23,480 --> 01:20:25,482 Thanks for the ass-kicking last night. 1484 01:20:25,640 --> 01:20:27,130 No problemo. 1485 01:20:28,120 --> 01:20:30,202 - Where's Grandma? LENORE: - Outside. 1486 01:20:30,920 --> 01:20:34,242 Maybe I'll bring her a cup. 1487 01:20:35,680 --> 01:20:39,571 Can we call a truce, or do we have to actually fistfight? 1488 01:20:41,800 --> 01:20:44,167 Grandma, I brought you some coffee. 1489 01:20:46,760 --> 01:20:48,330 Hey. 1490 01:20:48,480 --> 01:20:50,289 Hello? 1491 01:20:52,560 --> 01:20:55,564 Grandma, I brought you some coffee. 1492 01:20:55,720 --> 01:20:57,484 Grandma? 1493 01:21:00,360 --> 01:21:01,885 Grandma? 1494 01:21:02,080 --> 01:21:03,923 Grandma? Grandma. 1495 01:21:04,760 --> 01:21:06,728 Grandma. Grandma. 1496 01:21:06,920 --> 01:21:10,083 Come on. Shit. Come on, wake up. 1497 01:21:10,240 --> 01:21:12,208 Grandma, wake up! 1498 01:21:12,360 --> 01:21:15,443 Wake up! God. 1499 01:21:17,720 --> 01:21:20,007 I'm so sorry. 1500 01:21:21,200 --> 01:21:23,043 I'm so sorry. 1501 01:21:26,440 --> 01:21:27,965 Shit. 1502 01:21:31,640 --> 01:21:33,404 Hey! 1503 01:21:35,280 --> 01:21:37,886 - She's not breathing. She's dead. LENORE: - What? 1504 01:21:38,040 --> 01:21:39,615 - Oh, my God, what? TAMMY: - She's dead. 1505 01:21:39,640 --> 01:21:40,926 Oh, Robin, Call 911. 1506 01:21:41,120 --> 01:21:43,964 TAMMY: - She's dead. She's not breathing at all. - You can't be serious. 1507 01:21:44,120 --> 01:21:45,167 What's happened? 1508 01:21:45,320 --> 01:21:47,926 She's not breathing, and I just let her drink all night. 1509 01:21:48,080 --> 01:21:50,841 LENORE: - No, no, honey. It's not your fault. TAMMY: - It is my fault. 1510 01:21:50,960 --> 01:21:53,531 Tammy, it's not your fault. Oh, my God. What happened? 1511 01:21:53,720 --> 01:21:55,324 (SCREAMING) 1512 01:21:55,480 --> 01:21:57,050 Pearl! Oh, my God! 1513 01:21:57,840 --> 01:22:00,810 Oh, God! Oh, my God, Pearl! 1514 01:22:00,960 --> 01:22:02,564 Pearl! 1515 01:22:05,080 --> 01:22:06,286 What the fuck?! 1516 01:22:06,480 --> 01:22:08,403 - What the fuck? - What happened? 1517 01:22:08,560 --> 01:22:10,324 LENORE: Go get her. 1518 01:22:10,520 --> 01:22:12,602 - Oh, my God. SUSANNE: - She's not dead. 1519 01:22:12,760 --> 01:22:14,120 TAMMY: - Oh, my God. PEARL: - What? 1520 01:22:14,160 --> 01:22:17,482 TAMMY: - Sit. Okay, okay. - I think she passed out. 1521 01:22:17,640 --> 01:22:19,608 TAMMY: - What were you thinking? - What? 1522 01:22:19,760 --> 01:22:22,650 You weren't breathing. We all thought you were dead. 1523 01:22:22,800 --> 01:22:26,247 You are gonna clean your shit up. You're gonna stop all this drinking. 1524 01:22:26,400 --> 01:22:28,323 Do you hear me? You look terrible. 1525 01:22:28,480 --> 01:22:31,131 Well, my feet... I don't feel so good. 1526 01:22:31,280 --> 01:22:32,805 Goddamn it, Pearly. 1527 01:22:32,960 --> 01:22:35,361 Nobody should die in a lawn chair. 1528 01:22:37,720 --> 01:22:40,485 TAMMY: All right. All right, don't shake her, don't shake her. 1529 01:22:40,680 --> 01:22:42,045 Don't bounce her so much. 1530 01:22:42,200 --> 01:22:45,044 Remember, she's not taking all of her pills she's supposed to be taking. 1531 01:22:45,200 --> 01:22:47,009 EMT: Okay. Thank you, ma'am. 1532 01:22:47,800 --> 01:22:51,486 Did I flash my boobs last night? 1533 01:22:51,640 --> 01:22:53,483 TAMMY: - Yeah. You did. - Did I? 1534 01:22:53,640 --> 01:22:55,961 Yeah. You were throwing them around last night. 1535 01:22:56,120 --> 01:22:59,203 Beep, boop. All the way. Yeah, Earl has them all over Facebook. 1536 01:22:59,360 --> 01:23:02,204 TAMMY: They look good. I mean... 1537 01:23:02,360 --> 01:23:03,964 Oh, my God. 1538 01:23:04,160 --> 01:23:06,481 Oh, my God, I was mean... 1539 01:23:06,640 --> 01:23:08,404 Oh, I was mean to you. 1540 01:23:09,080 --> 01:23:11,651 I called you Cheeseburger. Oh, my God. 1541 01:23:11,840 --> 01:23:14,810 - It's okay. SUSANNE: - Pearly, we'll be right behind, okay? 1542 01:23:14,960 --> 01:23:16,800 TAMMY: - It's okay. It's okay. PEARL: - Oh, no. 1543 01:23:16,920 --> 01:23:19,002 SUSANNE: - We'll follow, okay? TAMMY: - Yeah. 1544 01:23:21,400 --> 01:23:23,721 Oh, shit. 1545 01:23:25,520 --> 01:23:26,760 Hey, officers. 1546 01:23:26,920 --> 01:23:30,163 Ambulance got here first, but she's gonna be okay. 1547 01:23:30,320 --> 01:23:33,051 So don't worry about it. Thank you, though. 1548 01:23:33,200 --> 01:23:36,647 Ma'am, we got reports that someone was burning a Jet Ski on the lake last night. 1549 01:23:36,800 --> 01:23:38,564 - You see anything? - Oh. 1550 01:23:38,720 --> 01:23:43,760 Uh, it's super uncool. I would never burn a watercraft. 1551 01:23:43,920 --> 01:23:45,285 - Oh, no. - No. 1552 01:23:45,440 --> 01:23:46,566 No? 1553 01:23:46,720 --> 01:23:49,326 We've also been tracking a 2004 Cadillac de Ville... 1554 01:23:49,480 --> 01:23:52,484 ...towing a Jet Ski that was involved in a robbery. Anything on that? 1555 01:23:53,920 --> 01:23:55,160 Uh... 1556 01:23:55,320 --> 01:23:57,129 You know, uh... Ooh, wow. 1557 01:23:57,280 --> 01:24:01,490 That's a Hawaiian bear shirt. You don't see a lot of those around here. 1558 01:24:02,240 --> 01:24:04,527 You probably see quite a few. 1559 01:24:04,720 --> 01:24:06,480 You're gonna have to come with us. Let's go. 1560 01:24:06,640 --> 01:24:08,400 TAMMY: - Oh. Come on, man. - Let's go, ma'am. 1561 01:24:08,520 --> 01:24:10,761 Stand back, ladies. Right this way. 1562 01:24:10,920 --> 01:24:12,445 TAMMY: I'm going with... 1563 01:24:12,600 --> 01:24:14,921 - I bet you see a lot of bear shirts. OFFICER: - No, no, ma'am. 1564 01:24:15,080 --> 01:24:18,129 - Constant. OFFICER: - Ma'am. Get... 1565 01:24:18,520 --> 01:24:20,415 - Are you serious? TAMMY: - Ow. There was a bee. 1566 01:24:20,440 --> 01:24:22,727 - There's no bees here, ma'am. - There was a bee. 1567 01:24:22,880 --> 01:24:24,484 You can't run from the law. 1568 01:24:30,080 --> 01:24:31,684 GUARD 1: Tammy Banks. 1569 01:24:31,840 --> 01:24:33,490 GUARD 2: On the gate. 1570 01:24:38,760 --> 01:24:40,649 See you later. 1571 01:24:40,840 --> 01:24:42,763 I hope not. 1572 01:24:46,160 --> 01:24:47,889 Hey, Dad. 1573 01:24:48,320 --> 01:24:51,164 Tammy. You rehabilitated? 1574 01:24:51,320 --> 01:24:55,041 - I guess. - Then let's go home. 1575 01:24:58,480 --> 01:25:00,209 Wherever that is. 1576 01:25:00,400 --> 01:25:03,370 Yeah. I'm not too happy with Greg. 1577 01:25:03,520 --> 01:25:05,284 Yeah, me either. 1578 01:25:05,440 --> 01:25:07,169 Look, um... 1579 01:25:08,320 --> 01:25:11,881 ...you want me to take care of that wiggly little motherfucker for you? 1580 01:25:13,120 --> 01:25:15,521 - What? - I'll go over there and kill him for you right now. 1581 01:25:16,640 --> 01:25:20,122 I'm old. I don't care if I go to jail. 1582 01:25:20,280 --> 01:25:21,884 They got magazines in there, don't they? 1583 01:25:22,480 --> 01:25:23,925 Oh. 1584 01:25:24,080 --> 01:25:27,721 I thought you were serious for a minute. Heh... 1585 01:25:28,800 --> 01:25:30,040 You're kidding, right? 1586 01:25:30,200 --> 01:25:32,202 Jesus, Dad. 1587 01:25:32,360 --> 01:25:34,567 You know we're at a prison. Okay? 1588 01:25:34,720 --> 01:25:39,089 I do not want you to hurt Greg in any way. 1589 01:25:39,240 --> 01:25:41,083 God. 1590 01:25:45,440 --> 01:25:48,649 You know, Grandma told me that she made a pass at you. 1591 01:25:49,280 --> 01:25:52,921 Heh. Oh, yeah, well, she used to hit on everybody all the time. 1592 01:25:54,000 --> 01:25:56,287 You know the ice-cream guy, Jerry Miller? 1593 01:25:56,440 --> 01:25:59,410 He was the only one who went for it. 1594 01:26:02,360 --> 01:26:03,646 Oh, God. 1595 01:26:03,840 --> 01:26:06,764 Let's roll. Mom's waiting. 1596 01:26:06,920 --> 01:26:08,570 TAMMY: Oh, God. 1597 01:26:16,840 --> 01:26:19,650 You don't have to go in there right now. 1598 01:26:19,800 --> 01:26:21,723 Now's a good a time as any. 1599 01:26:31,680 --> 01:26:34,365 - Hey, Tammy. - Hey, Greg. 1600 01:26:34,840 --> 01:26:35,887 Come on in. 1601 01:26:36,080 --> 01:26:37,161 TAMMY: - Really? - Yeah. 1602 01:26:47,120 --> 01:26:50,761 Well, see you kind of made yourself at home, huh? 1603 01:26:52,320 --> 01:26:54,049 Bold. 1604 01:26:54,880 --> 01:26:56,564 Uh... 1605 01:26:57,160 --> 01:27:02,121 Just wanted to, you know, let you guys know that I'm okay. 1606 01:27:02,320 --> 01:27:03,765 You know? With me. 1607 01:27:03,920 --> 01:27:07,402 Not so much what you guys did that's... 1608 01:27:07,560 --> 01:27:10,769 I mean, you know, that's really between you... 1609 01:27:10,920 --> 01:27:12,809 ...and that guy upstairs. 1610 01:27:12,960 --> 01:27:15,804 But I think he frowns on adultery. 1611 01:27:16,000 --> 01:27:18,685 I'd say that, so I think you burn, actually. 1612 01:27:19,760 --> 01:27:24,004 So I'm just gonna get my stuff. 1613 01:27:26,080 --> 01:27:29,607 MISSI: I, uh... I folded your clothes. 1614 01:27:47,240 --> 01:27:50,244 - So glad you're home. - Thanks for letting me stay here. 1615 01:27:50,400 --> 01:27:51,890 Oh, yeah. 1616 01:27:52,760 --> 01:27:53,966 You look good. 1617 01:27:54,160 --> 01:27:55,286 TAMMY: - Yeah? - Yeah. 1618 01:27:55,440 --> 01:27:58,205 - Prison agree with me? Heh. - Heh. Yeah. Ha-ha-ha. 1619 01:27:58,360 --> 01:28:00,044 Think it kind of did. 1620 01:28:02,560 --> 01:28:03,971 I got your room all set up so... 1621 01:28:04,120 --> 01:28:05,406 - Yeah? DEB: - Yeah. 1622 01:28:05,560 --> 01:28:08,370 Oh, God. I'm not bunking with Grandma, am I? 1623 01:28:08,520 --> 01:28:11,569 - No. Heh. She's at Brookview. TAMMY: - What? 1624 01:28:11,760 --> 01:28:13,842 Did you lock her up? That is bullshit! 1625 01:28:14,000 --> 01:28:16,128 - Give me your car keys, Dad. - Tammy, wait! 1626 01:28:16,280 --> 01:28:19,250 - I'm gonna remember that when you get old. DEB: - Tammy. 1627 01:28:22,240 --> 01:28:23,571 Hey! 1628 01:28:25,160 --> 01:28:28,209 - Hey, super-old guy, where's Pearl Balzen? - What? 1629 01:28:28,400 --> 01:28:29,970 Oh, God. 1630 01:28:32,520 --> 01:28:34,761 Come on, man. 1631 01:28:38,480 --> 01:28:40,403 Grandma. 1632 01:28:40,560 --> 01:28:41,686 Tammy! 1633 01:28:41,840 --> 01:28:44,161 I didn't know you were coming. Come here, give me a hug. 1634 01:28:44,320 --> 01:28:46,288 TAMMY: Look at you. It's worse than I thought. 1635 01:28:46,440 --> 01:28:50,161 PEARL: Why do you have to go so fast? All right, everybody. I'll be back. 1636 01:28:51,280 --> 01:28:53,282 TAMMY: I got the car. Let's go. 1637 01:28:53,440 --> 01:28:56,046 - Goddamn it. Ooh. - I'll get the door. 1638 01:28:56,200 --> 01:28:58,931 You could've killed me. What are you thinking? 1639 01:28:59,080 --> 01:29:01,811 Just stop. Do you hear me? 1640 01:29:01,960 --> 01:29:05,203 Oh, my God. You can still walk. 1641 01:29:05,400 --> 01:29:08,210 Of course I can walk. I was teaching an exercise class. 1642 01:29:08,400 --> 01:29:09,925 Why were you sitting in a wheelchair? 1643 01:29:10,080 --> 01:29:12,082 Because most of them are in wheelchairs. 1644 01:29:12,280 --> 01:29:14,487 Well, why didn't you tell me you were in here? 1645 01:29:14,640 --> 01:29:16,642 I didn't wanna make you jealous. 1646 01:29:16,800 --> 01:29:19,531 I mean, you were in jail, and I'm at this cool place. 1647 01:29:19,680 --> 01:29:21,250 And my AA meetings are here. 1648 01:29:21,400 --> 01:29:26,770 I made friends, and I'm seeing this 84-year-old from Philly. 1649 01:29:26,960 --> 01:29:29,201 He was a hockey player, so he seems younger but... 1650 01:29:30,400 --> 01:29:33,961 We've been going kind of slow, and this might be the weekend. 1651 01:29:34,600 --> 01:29:35,761 Ugh. 1652 01:29:37,800 --> 01:29:39,484 You look good. 1653 01:29:39,680 --> 01:29:41,569 Thanks. You look great. 1654 01:29:41,720 --> 01:29:42,881 - Yeah? - Yeah. 1655 01:29:43,040 --> 01:29:45,281 I was afraid to eat the meat in jail, so... 1656 01:29:45,480 --> 01:29:46,891 - That's a good call. - Yeah. 1657 01:29:49,240 --> 01:29:52,881 God. I am so sorry. So sorry about everything. 1658 01:29:53,040 --> 01:29:54,724 I'm sorry. 1659 01:29:54,880 --> 01:29:57,611 I was a total jerk to you, and I should've taken better care of you. 1660 01:29:57,760 --> 01:30:00,081 No, it wasn't your job to take care of me. 1661 01:30:00,240 --> 01:30:02,242 Little bit, it was. 1662 01:30:02,880 --> 01:30:05,690 No, I love you so much. I really do. 1663 01:30:05,840 --> 01:30:07,330 Well, I'm pretty great. 1664 01:30:07,480 --> 01:30:09,482 You are really great. 1665 01:30:10,520 --> 01:30:11,931 I love you too. 1666 01:30:16,000 --> 01:30:18,651 We're gonna spend tonight at Lenore's and get up early... 1667 01:30:18,800 --> 01:30:22,247 ...and drive straight to Niagara Falls. - Call me when you get to Lenore's. 1668 01:30:22,400 --> 01:30:24,641 - All right, I will, Mom. - Don't forget. 1669 01:30:25,240 --> 01:30:27,891 - Mom, I've got it, okay? DEB: - Okay, great. 1670 01:30:28,720 --> 01:30:32,361 - Stay hydrated. - All right. 1671 01:30:33,000 --> 01:30:35,844 Ah. Okay. 1672 01:30:36,000 --> 01:30:39,561 - Well, thanks for fixing up my car, Dad. - Oh, not a problem. 1673 01:30:39,720 --> 01:30:43,566 - Just don't rob anybody in it. - I'm not gonna rob anybody in it. 1674 01:30:46,360 --> 01:30:47,964 Let's light this candle. 1675 01:30:48,120 --> 01:30:49,770 (LAUGHS) 1676 01:30:49,960 --> 01:30:51,610 Let's go, woman. 1677 01:30:51,760 --> 01:30:53,683 PEARL: - I got it. - You're strong. 1678 01:30:55,520 --> 01:30:56,851 Ooh. 1679 01:30:57,000 --> 01:30:59,128 Dukes of Hazzard style. 1680 01:31:04,600 --> 01:31:08,127 TAMMY: Lenore stocked up the RV, so we're all good to go. 1681 01:31:08,320 --> 01:31:11,369 ("DO YOUR EARS HANG LOW?" PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS) 1682 01:31:12,080 --> 01:31:13,525 Oh, God. It's Jerry Miller. 1683 01:31:13,680 --> 01:31:16,729 Ladies. Who wants a bone cone? 1684 01:31:16,880 --> 01:31:18,962 - Go, go. Just go. - Okay. 1685 01:31:19,760 --> 01:31:21,364 PEARL: Ugh. 1686 01:31:23,640 --> 01:31:26,803 So, what do you think, Grandma? It's a good day to go to Niagara Falls? 1687 01:31:27,000 --> 01:31:28,081 I'm ready. 1688 01:31:28,240 --> 01:31:33,371 My daddy always said that Niagara Falls is the closest thing to heaven on earth. 1689 01:31:49,720 --> 01:31:51,722 (ALL WHOOPING) 1690 01:31:55,680 --> 01:31:57,489 (LAUGHING) 1691 01:31:57,640 --> 01:32:00,291 Oh! 1692 01:32:27,920 --> 01:32:29,046 (MOUTHS) Sorry. 1693 01:32:33,160 --> 01:32:34,969 What are you doing here? 1694 01:32:56,960 --> 01:32:59,361 So how'd you know to come here to Niagara, anyway? 1695 01:32:59,520 --> 01:33:00,806 A little birdie told me. 1696 01:33:00,960 --> 01:33:03,167 - Is the bird named Pearl? Ha, ha. - Yes. 1697 01:33:04,040 --> 01:33:06,964 So, what's going on with you, Tammy? What's next? 1698 01:33:07,120 --> 01:33:10,329 Thinking about getting my own place in Louisville. 1699 01:33:10,520 --> 01:33:12,045 - Really? - Yeah. 1700 01:33:13,280 --> 01:33:15,487 - Interesting. TAMMY: - Yeah, it is. Isn't it? 1701 01:33:16,200 --> 01:33:18,043 Get myself a sweet little place... 1702 01:33:18,200 --> 01:33:22,603 ...and, you know, maybe you can come over and watch a movie. 1703 01:33:22,760 --> 01:33:25,889 Do you guys feel how the falls are charging the ions? 1704 01:33:26,040 --> 01:33:27,935 - It's incredible, right? BOBBY & TAMMY: - Yes. 1705 01:33:27,960 --> 01:33:30,327 - Romantic. - Yeah, it is. 1706 01:33:30,480 --> 01:33:31,481 (TAMMY CLEARS THROAT) 1707 01:33:31,640 --> 01:33:35,690 Oh. Well, my daddy was right. It's beautiful here. 1708 01:33:35,880 --> 01:33:37,962 Yeah, it's pretty cool. 1709 01:33:39,520 --> 01:33:43,730 You think I should try to rent a barrel and try to shoot the falls? 1710 01:33:43,880 --> 01:33:46,360 PEARL: I think we should just look at them, maybe. 1711 01:33:46,520 --> 01:33:47,931 - Yeah. TAMMY: - Really? 1712 01:33:48,080 --> 01:33:50,208 I don't know. I got a good feeling. 1713 01:33:50,360 --> 01:33:52,601 I feel like I've been thinking about a course... 1714 01:33:52,760 --> 01:33:55,650 ...and if I just shoot out into the middle soft spot there... 1715 01:33:55,800 --> 01:34:00,169 ...it'll probably just pillow-carry me right over that Canadian lagoon over there. 1716 01:34:00,360 --> 01:34:03,648 I think if anyone could do it, it would be you. 1717 01:34:06,160 --> 01:34:07,525 TAMMY: Oh! Oh. 1718 01:34:07,680 --> 01:34:10,650 I thought I saw the Cheetos. It's not them. 1719 01:34:10,800 --> 01:34:12,529 You guys wanna get Cheetos? 1720 01:34:18,480 --> 01:34:20,289 - Hey, man. How you doing? MAN: - Hey. Good. 1721 01:34:20,440 --> 01:34:22,761 - What can I get for you? - I'm gonna have the iced tea... 1722 01:34:22,920 --> 01:34:25,127 ...and then the full rack of the pork ribs. 1723 01:34:27,360 --> 01:34:30,170 The full rack, that's a lot of sodium. 1724 01:34:30,320 --> 01:34:31,924 You wanna think about going half? 1725 01:34:32,080 --> 01:34:35,050 Oh. Uh, no, I'm gonna get the full rack. 1726 01:34:35,400 --> 01:34:36,640 I'm gonna say no. 1727 01:34:36,800 --> 01:34:39,451 I'm gonna say let's, together, make a better choice. 1728 01:34:39,600 --> 01:34:43,730 How about salmon? Give you a little cup of BBQ sauce on the side to spice it up. 1729 01:34:43,880 --> 01:34:47,851 - Better choice, still got zip. - I'm just gonna do the ribs. 1730 01:34:48,000 --> 01:34:49,365 How's your cholesterol? 1731 01:34:50,120 --> 01:34:54,205 - It's a concern. It's up there, but... - Oh, Jesus. 1732 01:34:54,360 --> 01:34:57,125 - I'm gonna take away the barbecue sauce. MAN: - Oh, man. 1733 01:34:57,280 --> 01:35:00,011 All right? Poom. You're gonna thank me later. 1734 01:35:00,160 --> 01:35:03,164 - I'm gonna fill that up for you. - Can I...? 1735 01:35:03,360 --> 01:35:05,567 I can't believe you're leaving me for that dick. 1736 01:35:05,760 --> 01:35:09,321 That dick is gonna have his own franchise in three goddamn years. What are you gonna do? 1737 01:35:09,480 --> 01:35:10,970 Come on, shake a tit. 1738 01:35:11,120 --> 01:35:14,090 - Happy hour's over in 20 minutes. MISSI: - Aah! 1739 01:35:14,240 --> 01:35:17,005 - That's how it's done. GREG: - This is BS. 1740 01:35:17,160 --> 01:35:19,845 This is a huge mistake. 1741 01:35:20,000 --> 01:35:22,685 You have got to stop yawning so much, Charlotte. 1742 01:35:22,840 --> 01:35:24,160 DON: - Are you Keith? - I'm Keith. 1743 01:35:26,240 --> 01:35:28,481 - Aah! - Poom! 1744 01:35:29,880 --> 01:35:31,769 KEITH: Help me, Charlotte. 1745 01:35:34,280 --> 01:35:36,408 You were right. This hot tub is awesome. 1746 01:35:36,560 --> 01:35:38,449 Right? Yeah. 1747 01:35:38,600 --> 01:35:42,730 - So how you liking Louisville? - I love it. I love where I live, where I work. 1748 01:35:42,920 --> 01:35:44,365 I love the man I lay with. 1749 01:35:45,000 --> 01:35:46,650 - It's A-okay with me. - Great. 1750 01:35:48,080 --> 01:35:51,880 Hey, Larry, this sangria is awesome. 1751 01:35:52,040 --> 01:35:55,283 Thank you. The secret's in the maraschino cherries. 1752 01:35:55,440 --> 01:35:58,842 Oh. I see you got a couple of maraschino cherries yourself. 1753 01:35:59,000 --> 01:36:00,809 - Oh! Ha, ha. - Oh! 1754 01:36:47,160 --> 01:36:48,207 Pew. 1755 01:36:48,400 --> 01:36:49,686 Pew, pew, pew. 1756 01:36:49,840 --> 01:36:53,447 Pew, pew, pew. Pew. Pew. 1757 01:36:53,600 --> 01:36:55,967 Hey, don't let a deer hit you on the way out. 1758 01:36:56,160 --> 01:36:58,447 You dick. You know what? 1759 01:36:59,560 --> 01:37:03,326 KEITH: You are no longer an employee of Topperjack's. 1760 01:37:03,480 --> 01:37:05,482 (ALL LAUGHING) 1761 01:37:06,160 --> 01:37:09,448 My secrets! My secret! 1762 01:40:29,040 --> 01:40:31,042 (English US - SDH) 1762 01:40:32,305 --> 01:41:32,767 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 134936