All language subtitles for Schitts Creek (2015) - S06E11 - The Bachelor Party (1080p AMZN WEB-DL x265 MONOLITH)
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1
00:00:06,554 --> 00:00:07,852
Okay, Stevie, I told you
I didn't want
2
00:00:07,877 --> 00:00:09,270
a jokey bachelor party.
3
00:00:09,313 --> 00:00:11,489
Also, my t-shirt is missing
the "with".
4
00:00:11,666 --> 00:00:13,510
Oh, no, I had yours custom-made.
5
00:00:13,535 --> 00:00:15,015
- Okay.
- Now,
6
00:00:15,058 --> 00:00:17,104
before I tell you what
I have planned...
7
00:00:17,147 --> 00:00:19,149
for tonight's festivities,
8
00:00:19,193 --> 00:00:21,456
I think we can all agree
that putting me in charge
9
00:00:21,518 --> 00:00:24,086
of your joint bachelor party
was a big mistake, right?
10
00:00:24,111 --> 00:00:26,026
- I'm sure it's gonna be great.
- Absolutely.
11
00:00:26,069 --> 00:00:28,289
And the fact that you guys
wanted it to be
12
00:00:28,332 --> 00:00:29,594
the "bachelor party
of your dreams"
13
00:00:29,638 --> 00:00:32,423
only added extra,
totally unnecessary pressure
14
00:00:32,467 --> 00:00:33,990
to the whole thing.
- 'Kay, Stevie,
15
00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,905
we never said that.
- Oh no, you didn't.
16
00:00:35,948 --> 00:00:38,168
David sent me a seven-page
e-mail with the subject line,
17
00:00:38,212 --> 00:00:40,475
"The Bachelor Party
of My Dreams".
18
00:00:40,518 --> 00:00:42,346
We will be happy with
whatever you've planned.
19
00:00:42,390 --> 00:00:44,914
Right, David?
- Yes.
20
00:00:44,957 --> 00:00:47,047
Just depends on
what she's planned.
21
00:00:47,090 --> 00:00:49,701
Oh.
22
00:00:49,745 --> 00:00:51,094
Oh...
23
00:00:51,138 --> 00:00:54,402
David, you wanted something
chic and elegant.
24
00:00:54,445 --> 00:00:57,187
I have arranged for a night
of customized appetizers
25
00:00:57,231 --> 00:00:59,755
and cocktails at the Wobbly Elm.
26
00:00:59,798 --> 00:01:01,365
Wow, that's bleak.
27
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,543
But thank you...
for planning that.
28
00:01:05,587 --> 00:01:06,718
- There we go.
- Mm.
29
00:01:06,762 --> 00:01:08,242
- Patrick...
- Yeah.
30
00:01:08,285 --> 00:01:09,721
- You just wanted one thing.
- Mm-hmm.
31
00:01:09,765 --> 00:01:13,073
So before we indulge in
an elegant night of shots,
32
00:01:13,116 --> 00:01:16,784
we will all experience
the thrill
33
00:01:16,902 --> 00:01:19,862
of Elmdale's finest and only...
34
00:01:19,905 --> 00:01:21,081
Escape Room.
35
00:01:21,124 --> 00:01:22,734
- Yes!
- Okay,
36
00:01:22,778 --> 00:01:24,494
isn't that a Jodie Foster movie?
37
00:01:24,697 --> 00:01:26,173
No, David, that is Panic Room.
38
00:01:26,216 --> 00:01:28,392
An escape room is like a,
a fun group game
39
00:01:28,436 --> 00:01:29,872
where you're trapped in a room
40
00:01:29,915 --> 00:01:32,092
and you have to solve
all these puzzles to get out.
41
00:01:32,135 --> 00:01:34,137
You lost me at fun group game.
42
00:01:34,181 --> 00:01:36,661
I'm sorry, my family agreed
to this?
43
00:01:36,762 --> 00:01:38,677
Your family hasn't responded
to a single email,
44
00:01:38,702 --> 00:01:40,574
so they will be doing
what we tell them to do.
45
00:01:40,811 --> 00:01:42,914
Is there anything else
on my list
46
00:01:42,939 --> 00:01:44,438
that we could do this evening?
47
00:01:44,463 --> 00:01:45,727
If you could come up with
the money
48
00:01:45,752 --> 00:01:47,237
for the Tahitian dolphin cruise,
49
00:01:47,262 --> 00:01:48,826
I'd happily change plans.
50
00:01:49,619 --> 00:01:50,400
No?
51
00:01:50,581 --> 00:01:52,540
Don't say a word.
52
00:01:58,391 --> 00:02:01,829
So I leaned in and I said,
"Tippy, I'll take the job...
53
00:02:01,991 --> 00:02:04,167
for a hundred grand more
than Clifton,
54
00:02:04,211 --> 00:02:06,256
and a diamond tennis bracelet."
55
00:02:06,300 --> 00:02:07,823
What was the bracelet for?
56
00:02:07,866 --> 00:02:10,192
Dramatic effect. Symbolism.
57
00:02:10,361 --> 00:02:12,654
And you said Nicole Kidman
is starring in it?
58
00:02:12,697 --> 00:02:14,656
Oh, it doesn't matter
who's starring!
59
00:02:14,699 --> 00:02:16,701
I don't think the point
is getting across.
60
00:02:16,745 --> 00:02:17,920
No, no, I get it.
61
00:02:17,945 --> 00:02:20,488
It's just that a lot of people
would have a really hard time
62
00:02:20,531 --> 00:02:21,663
saying no to that kind of work,
63
00:02:21,706 --> 00:02:23,621
especially when you spent
the last three years
64
00:02:23,665 --> 00:02:25,230
talking about how badly
65
00:02:25,255 --> 00:02:26,622
you wanted to get outta
this place.
66
00:02:26,779 --> 00:02:28,409
Oh, we're still on course.
67
00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:30,280
Oh, you know what they say,
68
00:02:30,343 --> 00:02:33,215
when one door closes,
the floodgates open.
69
00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:34,632
You got another job?
70
00:02:34,676 --> 00:02:37,244
Say hello, ladies,
to the new spokesperson
71
00:02:37,287 --> 00:02:39,898
of an international airline.
72
00:02:40,099 --> 00:02:42,074
Oh my gosh, Mrs. Rose!
73
00:02:42,118 --> 00:02:44,449
You're gonna be in a commercial
for an airline?!
74
00:02:44,474 --> 00:02:45,643
Radio, yes.
75
00:02:45,687 --> 00:02:48,298
Voiceover work
is every actor's dream.
76
00:02:48,615 --> 00:02:51,258
- Well, I'm glad you're happy.
- Thank you!
77
00:02:51,301 --> 00:02:53,129
I have to admit, Mrs. Rose,
78
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,218
these past few weeks,
79
00:02:55,262 --> 00:02:57,481
I feel like I've been waiting
on a famous person.
80
00:02:57,525 --> 00:02:59,222
Twyla,
81
00:02:59,266 --> 00:03:01,833
you're not waiting on
a famous person.
82
00:03:01,877 --> 00:03:03,618
She's already arrived!
83
00:03:08,857 --> 00:03:10,625
- 'Kay, what's going on?
- Hey, guys, come on in!
84
00:03:10,668 --> 00:03:11,843
Close the door.
85
00:03:11,887 --> 00:03:13,367
Johnny, this better be good.
86
00:03:13,410 --> 00:03:15,804
I got a hot little BLT
over at the café
87
00:03:15,847 --> 00:03:17,240
and I don't wanna keep her
waitin'.
88
00:03:17,284 --> 00:03:19,503
I got some big news.
89
00:03:19,547 --> 00:03:23,115
I've been, uh, reaching out
to some old business contacts
90
00:03:23,159 --> 00:03:25,901
about potentially investing
in a motel franchise,
91
00:03:25,944 --> 00:03:28,382
and I got a very positive
response today
92
00:03:28,425 --> 00:03:31,298
from Mike Morrison,
my former assistant,
93
00:03:31,341 --> 00:03:34,039
who's now a big venture
capitalist.
94
00:03:34,239 --> 00:03:36,372
- Ooh, wow!
- Okay, so what does this mean?
95
00:03:36,397 --> 00:03:38,321
More, more money?
96
00:03:38,346 --> 00:03:40,000
Possibly.
97
00:03:42,490 --> 00:03:43,658
I'm listening.
98
00:03:43,701 --> 00:03:45,921
Well, I don't wanna put
the cart before the horse here,
99
00:03:45,964 --> 00:03:49,054
but I have a feeling
this is a prospect
100
00:03:49,098 --> 00:03:52,232
we can all get very excited
about!
101
00:03:52,275 --> 00:03:53,972
- But what does this mean?
Do they wanna invest?
102
00:03:54,016 --> 00:03:55,235
Do they like the idea?
103
00:03:55,278 --> 00:03:56,932
Well, they haven't heard
the idea yet.
104
00:03:56,975 --> 00:03:59,326
I gave him a teaser
in my last e-mail.
105
00:03:59,369 --> 00:04:01,371
And, uh, we'll have to take
a meeting with him
106
00:04:01,415 --> 00:04:04,200
and, you know,
do a formal pitch.
107
00:04:04,527 --> 00:04:05,762
Sure. Well,
when's the meeting?
108
00:04:05,787 --> 00:04:08,137
We don't actually have
a meeting yet,
109
00:04:08,162 --> 00:04:11,183
but he is calling today, so...
110
00:04:11,208 --> 00:04:12,382
Johnny, I'm sorry, I was so busy
111
00:04:12,426 --> 00:04:14,341
being excited like you asked,
112
00:04:14,384 --> 00:04:16,517
that, um, I think I missed
something here.
113
00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:19,389
Do we have an investor
or do we have a meeting?
114
00:04:19,784 --> 00:04:20,959
We might.
115
00:04:21,286 --> 00:04:23,741
And I want you to keep this
information to yourself.
116
00:04:23,785 --> 00:04:27,092
I don't want the family finding
out and getting their hopes up.
117
00:04:27,380 --> 00:04:29,113
I'm pretty sure I can keep
this one to myself.
118
00:04:29,138 --> 00:04:31,140
Okay. Yeah,
I don't know about me.
119
00:04:31,183 --> 00:04:33,577
I mean, if the local papers
ask me about the rumour
120
00:04:33,621 --> 00:04:35,449
that you might be getting
a phone call...
121
00:04:35,492 --> 00:04:37,015
All right, all right,
you know what, Roland?
122
00:04:37,059 --> 00:04:39,279
You can go and finish
your sandwich now.
123
00:04:39,322 --> 00:04:40,802
- Thank you.
And by the way, Johnny,
124
00:04:40,845 --> 00:04:42,630
you should check to make sure
this place isn't bugged.
125
00:04:42,673 --> 00:04:45,110
We wouldn't want the big news
to leak out!
126
00:04:45,154 --> 00:04:47,852
It is big news...
127
00:04:48,677 --> 00:04:50,070
probably.
128
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:55,265
Hi.
129
00:04:55,290 --> 00:04:56,987
What, uh, um...
130
00:04:57,247 --> 00:04:58,859
are those... sweatpants?
131
00:04:58,902 --> 00:05:00,861
Yeah, I started getting
dressed for work
132
00:05:00,904 --> 00:05:02,514
and I got distracted.
133
00:05:02,558 --> 00:05:03,994
What could have possibly
distracted you enough
134
00:05:04,038 --> 00:05:06,606
- to do that to yourself?
- It died, David.
135
00:05:06,649 --> 00:05:08,433
Okay, if you're talking
about your style,
136
00:05:08,477 --> 00:05:10,000
we can bring it back to life.
137
00:05:10,044 --> 00:05:11,611
Ted gave this to me.
138
00:05:11,654 --> 00:05:13,569
It's like the one thing left
of our relationship
139
00:05:13,613 --> 00:05:15,005
and it's gone.
- 'Kay,
140
00:05:15,049 --> 00:05:17,617
I would argue that you still
have your memories.
141
00:05:17,660 --> 00:05:19,793
This weird little desert
daisy thing...
142
00:05:19,836 --> 00:05:21,142
It's a succulent.
143
00:05:21,185 --> 00:05:23,100
Literally not supposed
to die, and yet it did.
144
00:05:23,144 --> 00:05:25,450
Like what does that say
about me?
145
00:05:25,494 --> 00:05:27,409
I think that's a longer
conversation.
146
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:30,325
But here's one thing
that'll make you feel good:
147
00:05:30,368 --> 00:05:32,196
my bachelor party tonight.
148
00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:34,634
I'm pretty sure I told Stevie
that I couldn't come,
149
00:05:34,677 --> 00:05:37,158
or like I started sending her
an email saying that.
150
00:05:37,201 --> 00:05:38,725
I don't know, I just...
151
00:05:38,768 --> 00:05:40,857
I can't seem to do anything
right now.
152
00:05:40,901 --> 00:05:43,468
Mm-hmm. I never thought
I'd have to say this,
153
00:05:43,512 --> 00:05:44,948
but there is only space
in this family
154
00:05:44,992 --> 00:05:46,471
for one unstable sibling,
155
00:05:46,515 --> 00:05:49,300
and I have held that title
for a very long time,
156
00:05:49,344 --> 00:05:51,563
so you are going to have
to get it together.
157
00:05:51,607 --> 00:05:53,653
David, I don't have
a boyfriend anymore.
158
00:05:53,696 --> 00:05:55,393
I'm like trying get my business
off the ground,
159
00:05:55,437 --> 00:05:56,873
but honestly, like how many
people in this town
160
00:05:56,917 --> 00:05:59,746
need a publicist?
Like, what am I doing?
161
00:06:01,365 --> 00:06:03,140
Well, as of 7:30 tonight,
162
00:06:03,184 --> 00:06:06,143
you will be thoroughly enjoying
yourself at my bachelor party.
163
00:06:06,187 --> 00:06:08,537
So, why don't you take a couple
of Mom's happy pills
164
00:06:08,580 --> 00:06:10,713
and we can just put this
whole situation on ice
165
00:06:10,757 --> 00:06:12,584
until tomorrow?
- No, I can't.
166
00:06:12,628 --> 00:06:14,195
I have to escort a client
to a meeting.
167
00:06:15,076 --> 00:06:17,000
- Alexis!
- Ugh!
168
00:06:17,029 --> 00:06:18,790
Are you almost ready, dear?
169
00:06:18,815 --> 00:06:20,639
The airline will not be
impressed
170
00:06:20,664 --> 00:06:23,537
if we don't have an on-schedule
arrival at the studio.
171
00:06:23,943 --> 00:06:26,947
Oh, David, is it all right
if I don't watch Panic Room
172
00:06:26,990 --> 00:06:28,688
with everyone tonight?
173
00:06:28,731 --> 00:06:30,951
Jo Foster once screened it
for me privately
174
00:06:30,994 --> 00:06:33,562
and I would like to keep that
memory safe.
175
00:06:33,605 --> 00:06:36,739
It's an escape room followed
by a really sad reception,
176
00:06:36,783 --> 00:06:38,959
and everyone will be
participating.
177
00:06:39,002 --> 00:06:40,917
Thank you so much!
178
00:06:42,319 --> 00:06:44,234
- Stevie?
- Yeah?
179
00:06:44,278 --> 00:06:47,237
I got this picture of David
back from the printer.
180
00:06:47,281 --> 00:06:49,848
I hope it's big enough.
- Oh my God, this is perfect!
181
00:06:49,892 --> 00:06:53,069
Are you sure we can't move
the bachelor party
182
00:06:53,113 --> 00:06:55,637
to the motel here?
We can bring out some games,
183
00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:58,118
and, you know, escape from...
one room to the other.
184
00:06:58,161 --> 00:07:01,425
This is just a bad time
to be away from the business.
185
00:07:01,469 --> 00:07:03,775
Ah... bachelor party, right?
186
00:07:03,819 --> 00:07:05,299
Yeah, it's just for family.
187
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:08,606
Well, I think godfather
is part of the family,
188
00:07:08,650 --> 00:07:09,825
is he not?
189
00:07:09,868 --> 00:07:12,697
Roland, I need you manning
the phones.
190
00:07:12,741 --> 00:07:14,830
Take it easy, Johnny, okay?
191
00:07:14,873 --> 00:07:17,093
Not that it's gonna happen,
but I'll come running
192
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,790
when Ike Morrison calls.
193
00:07:18,834 --> 00:07:20,792
You mean Mike Morrison.
194
00:07:20,836 --> 00:07:22,925
You're waiting on a call
from him, too?
195
00:07:22,968 --> 00:07:24,840
That's the only call
I'm expecting.
196
00:07:24,883 --> 00:07:28,365
No, you said you were waiting
on a call from "Ike" Morrison.
197
00:07:28,409 --> 00:07:30,019
I don't know an Ike Morrison.
198
00:07:30,062 --> 00:07:32,500
Mike Morrison was my assistant
for 3 years,
199
00:07:32,543 --> 00:07:34,241
I think I know what his name is.
200
00:07:34,284 --> 00:07:35,851
Well, that's what I thought!
201
00:07:35,894 --> 00:07:37,983
So I was confused when
a Mike Morrison called
202
00:07:38,027 --> 00:07:40,508
after you said Ike Morrison...
Mike Morrison called?!
203
00:07:40,551 --> 00:07:42,510
- Yeah.
- Well, give me the number!
204
00:07:42,553 --> 00:07:44,729
You know, maybe this is why
205
00:07:44,773 --> 00:07:46,949
Roland shouldn't be in charge
of phones.
206
00:07:46,992 --> 00:07:48,516
Hey!
207
00:07:48,559 --> 00:07:51,127
Hello? Oh, voicemail.
208
00:07:51,171 --> 00:07:53,651
Uh, Mike, Mike.
Hi, it's Johnny Rose calling.
209
00:07:53,695 --> 00:07:55,000
Sorry I didn't get your message.
210
00:07:55,044 --> 00:07:58,308
Uh, a few technical
difficulties on our end,
211
00:07:58,352 --> 00:08:00,832
but, uh, it's Johnny Rose
calling.
212
00:08:00,876 --> 00:08:02,921
Uh, Johnny Rose calling
you back.
213
00:08:02,965 --> 00:08:04,662
Uh, bye.
214
00:08:06,055 --> 00:08:08,710
Oh, I don't know.
H-how did that sound?
215
00:08:08,753 --> 00:08:11,016
Is there an option to redo it?
216
00:08:11,060 --> 00:08:12,931
Uh... no.
217
00:08:12,975 --> 00:08:15,195
- Yeah, it was fine.
- Okay.
218
00:08:15,238 --> 00:08:17,197
I don't think you mentioned
your name.
219
00:08:21,766 --> 00:08:23,507
The copy's on the stand.
220
00:08:23,551 --> 00:08:25,422
We'd like for you to read it
exactly as written.
221
00:08:25,466 --> 00:08:27,816
Oh wow, a prolific amount
of material.
222
00:08:27,859 --> 00:08:30,210
And I am being paid
for each spot, so hah!
223
00:08:30,253 --> 00:08:33,038
Oh, uh, we agreed to a flat
rate with your publicist.
224
00:08:35,258 --> 00:08:37,739
Well, there'll be nothing
flat about my performance.
225
00:08:37,782 --> 00:08:41,003
- Okay.
Whenever you're ready, Moira.
226
00:08:41,046 --> 00:08:44,398
Just start at the top, and...
high energy.
227
00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:46,182
Con brio, si!
228
00:08:47,749 --> 00:08:50,360
"We really care...
at Larry Air."
229
00:08:50,404 --> 00:08:52,232
I like that, it's snappy.
230
00:08:52,275 --> 00:08:54,103
"We really care...
Just roll right through.
231
00:08:54,146 --> 00:08:57,367
Just go on to the next line,
please.
232
00:08:57,411 --> 00:09:00,501
"A deal so rare,
it's Larry Air."
233
00:09:01,980 --> 00:09:05,027
"Never flown Larry Air?
Try Larry Air."
234
00:09:05,070 --> 00:09:08,073
Oh, that's a touch uninspired.
Alexis?
235
00:09:08,117 --> 00:09:11,120
Alexis!
I'd rather not use that one.
236
00:09:11,163 --> 00:09:13,514
Okay, so I'm being told just
to read through them all
237
00:09:13,557 --> 00:09:15,994
and then we'll figure it out
after, okay?
238
00:09:16,019 --> 00:09:18,239
And higher energy.
239
00:09:18,264 --> 00:09:19,237
Higher...
240
00:09:19,694 --> 00:09:22,479
"Get your
derriere on Larry Air..."
241
00:09:22,523 --> 00:09:24,916
That's a bit chummy
for an airline.
242
00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:27,571
Couldn't we maybe take a moment
to rework some of these?
243
00:09:27,615 --> 00:09:29,138
The client's not here.
244
00:09:29,181 --> 00:09:30,966
It's my job just to get you
to say the words.
245
00:09:33,599 --> 00:09:34,839
"Larry Air.
246
00:09:34,883 --> 00:09:37,015
We'll take you from there...
to here..."
247
00:09:37,059 --> 00:09:39,496
Now that should switched,
shouldn't it? You should...
248
00:09:39,540 --> 00:09:42,151
Alexis, I can't work like this!
249
00:09:42,194 --> 00:09:43,805
No.
250
00:09:43,848 --> 00:09:46,721
Alexis!
251
00:09:46,764 --> 00:09:48,940
I'm so sorry. This is like
the first offer I could get
252
00:09:48,984 --> 00:09:51,421
after that whole "Sunrise Bay"
thing went down, and I...
253
00:09:51,465 --> 00:09:52,727
I thought it would get you
back out there,
254
00:09:52,770 --> 00:09:55,120
but I did not know that
it would be this.
255
00:09:55,164 --> 00:09:57,775
Have I made a terrible
mistake, Alexis?
256
00:09:57,819 --> 00:09:59,690
Is this the lowest point
of my life?
257
00:09:59,734 --> 00:10:01,692
Okay, look who
you're talking to.
258
00:10:01,736 --> 00:10:03,781
I haven't showered in like
two days.
259
00:10:03,825 --> 00:10:05,696
Is this the lowest point
of my life?
260
00:10:05,740 --> 00:10:07,959
Thought you should know
that we can hear
261
00:10:08,003 --> 00:10:10,353
your entire conversation.
- Ooh... okay.
262
00:10:10,397 --> 00:10:11,833
You should not have to do this,
263
00:10:11,876 --> 00:10:14,575
so you start the car
and I will cover for you.
264
00:10:14,618 --> 00:10:16,490
Oh, Alexis, no.
265
00:10:16,533 --> 00:10:17,839
No, dear,
266
00:10:17,882 --> 00:10:20,537
I could not let you do that
for me.
267
00:10:24,411 --> 00:10:26,978
Just hit "record".
268
00:10:27,022 --> 00:10:29,851
"Try one of our in-flight meals,
269
00:10:29,894 --> 00:10:32,810
if you dare... at Larry Air."
270
00:10:35,225 --> 00:10:38,271
I'm sorry, this is not...
this is not good, so.
271
00:10:39,295 --> 00:10:41,297
Hmm, hmm, hmm!
272
00:10:51,002 --> 00:10:55,398
Okay, well, um, I would just
like to welcome everybody
273
00:10:55,442 --> 00:10:57,835
to our... bachelor party.
274
00:10:57,879 --> 00:11:00,229
Is anyone else not getting
a signal in here?
275
00:11:00,272 --> 00:11:02,840
- I thought there were drinks.
- That's after.
276
00:11:02,884 --> 00:11:05,452
Okay, how about half of us
do the escape room,
277
00:11:05,495 --> 00:11:07,541
and then the other half of us
get a table at the bar?
278
00:11:07,584 --> 00:11:09,456
Okay, how 'bout you shh
for a sec.
279
00:11:09,499 --> 00:11:11,414
Now, this will all go a lot
smoother
280
00:11:11,458 --> 00:11:12,894
if we just accept the fact
281
00:11:12,937 --> 00:11:15,200
that this is something we
have to do, and that Patrick,
282
00:11:15,244 --> 00:11:17,377
for some reason, thinks this
is gonna be... fun!
283
00:11:17,420 --> 00:11:19,379
- Fun!
- Here he is.
284
00:11:19,422 --> 00:11:21,424
Hi, hi, hi. Sorry, it took me
forever to find a spot.
285
00:11:21,468 --> 00:11:23,426
- That's okay!
- Who's excited, huh?!
286
00:11:23,470 --> 00:11:25,167
- Oh, hah-hah.
- Oh... huzzah.
287
00:11:25,210 --> 00:11:26,864
So I guess you're all
wondering uh...
288
00:11:26,908 --> 00:11:28,692
- what're we doing here?
- Hmm...
289
00:11:28,736 --> 00:11:30,694
But, uh, the annual escape
room challenge
290
00:11:30,738 --> 00:11:33,175
has been a Brewer family
tradition for a long time,
291
00:11:33,218 --> 00:11:35,656
and I thought it could be fun
to share it with my new family,
292
00:11:35,699 --> 00:11:37,701
since mine couldn't be here, so.
293
00:11:37,745 --> 00:11:39,790
Have they passed?
294
00:11:39,834 --> 00:11:41,966
Well, I'm sure I speak for
all of us when I say
295
00:11:42,010 --> 00:11:44,882
I hope we escape very quickly.
296
00:11:44,926 --> 00:11:47,015
That's
the spirit, Mr. Rose. Yes.
297
00:11:47,058 --> 00:11:49,234
Players, are you
ready to enter the laborator?
298
00:11:49,278 --> 00:11:50,975
Oh, I think so.
299
00:11:51,019 --> 00:11:52,847
Place all electronic devices
300
00:11:52,890 --> 00:11:54,892
inside the scientist's lockbx
301
00:11:54,936 --> 00:11:58,243
and enter at your own risk.
302
00:11:58,287 --> 00:12:00,681
- Okay, here we go.
- Oh my God.
303
00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:02,447
It's gonna be fun.
304
00:12:06,627 --> 00:12:08,629
Charles Darwin
is being held captive
305
00:12:08,654 --> 00:12:09,733
by his arch-nemesis,
306
00:12:09,777 --> 00:12:12,519
rival scientist,
Dr. Alfred R. Wallace,
307
00:12:12,562 --> 00:12:14,172
somewhere in the Galapagos
Islands.
308
00:12:14,216 --> 00:12:15,435
What?!
309
00:12:17,349 --> 00:12:18,394
You have one hour
to escape. It's your job to...
310
00:12:18,438 --> 00:12:19,613
This is a Galapagos-themed room!
311
00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:21,528
I didn't plan this part.
312
00:12:21,571 --> 00:12:23,530
It was just called
"The Laboratory."
313
00:12:23,573 --> 00:12:25,314
And I picked it
'cause it was the easiest.
314
00:12:25,357 --> 00:12:27,142
There are rumours
that Wallace's assistant
315
00:12:27,185 --> 00:12:29,666
sides with Darwin
and may be willing to help
316
00:12:29,710 --> 00:12:31,799
if you get stuck.
- There's our lucky break.
317
00:12:31,842 --> 00:12:35,498
Assistant, show us the exit.
318
00:12:35,542 --> 00:12:37,326
Don't worry,
I'm also in the Guild.
319
00:12:37,369 --> 00:12:39,633
That's uh, that's not exactly
how it works, Mrs. Rose.
320
00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:42,853
We do actually have
to try first.
321
00:12:42,897 --> 00:12:46,030
Okay. So, the numbers for the
combination on Darwin's journal
322
00:12:46,074 --> 00:12:48,511
are gonna be on finches
with red beaks.
323
00:12:48,555 --> 00:12:50,295
"Traveling east to west,
324
00:12:50,339 --> 00:12:52,776
the numbers on the beaks
will get you to the nest."
325
00:12:52,820 --> 00:12:54,691
I have a compass on my phone.
326
00:12:54,735 --> 00:12:57,868
Uh, when do we get our phones
back?
327
00:12:57,912 --> 00:12:59,740
Well, you don't actually need
a compass, Mr. Rose.
328
00:12:59,783 --> 00:13:02,307
It's, uh, more like
a brain teaser.
329
00:13:02,351 --> 00:13:04,962
So, uh, we'll cover more ground
if we pair off into teams.
330
00:13:05,006 --> 00:13:08,662
So Stevie and Mr. Rose,
uh, Alexis and, and David,
331
00:13:08,705 --> 00:13:11,447
and, uh, Mrs. Rose,
why don't you help me out?
332
00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:13,797
Oh, I'd love nothing more,
Patrick.
333
00:13:13,841 --> 00:13:15,582
Mrs. Rose, I'm sensing you
that you might be
334
00:13:15,625 --> 00:13:17,061
a little bit distracted,
335
00:13:17,105 --> 00:13:18,672
but unfortunately,
there is a time limit
336
00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:20,804
on us getting out of here.
337
00:13:20,848 --> 00:13:24,112
Oh, I used to share your
philosophic optimism, dear,
338
00:13:24,155 --> 00:13:25,679
but know the reality is,
339
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:27,768
we're never getting out of here.
340
00:13:27,811 --> 00:13:29,596
I wouldn't be so sure.
341
00:13:31,309 --> 00:13:32,789
Just found a finch.
342
00:13:33,022 --> 00:13:35,285
The first number is six, people!
343
00:13:35,310 --> 00:13:38,065
Okay. Okay, see this is why
I don't like mind games.
344
00:13:38,090 --> 00:13:40,614
It puts you in a situation
where you're made to feel dumb,
345
00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:41,791
even though you're not.
346
00:13:41,816 --> 00:13:44,490
Like, some people's minds
just don't work like this.
347
00:13:44,629 --> 00:13:46,066
Maybe I made a mistake?
348
00:13:46,091 --> 00:13:47,719
I did tell you to wear
sensible heels today,
349
00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:49,833
and I'm not sure this outfit
is entirely appropriate.
350
00:13:49,877 --> 00:13:51,835
No, I mean about not going
to the Galapagos.
351
00:13:51,879 --> 00:13:54,882
Like I'm having a hard time
not taking this as a sign.
352
00:13:55,271 --> 00:13:57,590
Okay, we're in a strip mall
on the side of the highway.
353
00:13:57,615 --> 00:13:59,191
I really wouldn't read
into this.
354
00:13:59,216 --> 00:14:02,654
Also, as stupid as this is,
I'm now invested.
355
00:14:02,849 --> 00:14:04,699
You know, there was a time,
before we got here,
356
00:14:04,724 --> 00:14:07,502
that I would've like gone
anywhere and done anything,
357
00:14:07,527 --> 00:14:09,225
no questions asked.
358
00:14:09,554 --> 00:14:11,904
Like, what if I'm just losing
my edge?
359
00:14:11,929 --> 00:14:14,540
All right, if this'll help me
escape this conversation:
360
00:14:14,565 --> 00:14:17,655
yes, it would have been
a mistake to go.
361
00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:19,944
- Okay, go on.
- Well, what were you gonna do?
362
00:14:19,969 --> 00:14:21,840
Follow another guy around
the world?
363
00:14:21,865 --> 00:14:23,258
Yeah, but what am I doing here?
364
00:14:23,283 --> 00:14:25,546
Setting Mom up with second-rate
radio gigs
365
00:14:25,571 --> 00:14:27,154
for regional airlines?
366
00:14:27,179 --> 00:14:29,732
'Kay, well, I don't know,
where do you wanna be then?
367
00:14:30,318 --> 00:14:31,940
- There.
- Where?
368
00:14:31,965 --> 00:14:34,359
- No, the finch.
Second row, in the middle.
369
00:14:34,460 --> 00:14:36,027
Trust me, Stavros and I used
to make out
370
00:14:36,052 --> 00:14:37,444
in his parents' aviary.
371
00:14:37,661 --> 00:14:39,526
Okay, we have the second number!
372
00:14:39,551 --> 00:14:41,568
The second number is eight!
373
00:14:43,099 --> 00:14:45,536
'Kay, I'm gonna start looking
from the top here.
374
00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:46,886
Excuse me, Assistant?
375
00:14:46,929 --> 00:14:48,888
Uh, any chance of getting
our phones back?
376
00:14:48,931 --> 00:14:51,629
I know, I'm aware of
the no-phones situation,
377
00:14:51,673 --> 00:14:53,849
but I need mine for a business...
378
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:55,416
See, I don't know
what this means.
379
00:14:55,459 --> 00:14:57,374
I heard a rumour you're on
our side,
380
00:14:57,418 --> 00:14:59,550
and I'm, I'm waiting on
an important call.
381
00:14:59,594 --> 00:15:00,682
I found it!
382
00:15:00,725 --> 00:15:02,162
I found it!
I found the third finch.
383
00:15:02,205 --> 00:15:04,599
- Okay. Okay!
- It's four, David. Four.
384
00:15:04,642 --> 00:15:06,122
6-8-4.
- Okay!
385
00:15:07,254 --> 00:15:08,690
Six...
386
00:15:08,733 --> 00:15:10,605
eight...
387
00:15:10,648 --> 00:15:12,041
four...
388
00:15:12,066 --> 00:15:13,850
Ah-hah-hah!
389
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:15,523
Ahh! Ahhh!
390
00:15:15,566 --> 00:15:17,307
- Woo!
- Yes!
391
00:15:17,351 --> 00:15:20,354
'Kay. It says "natural
selection."
392
00:15:20,397 --> 00:15:22,138
- Ahh!
- Oh my God!
393
00:15:22,182 --> 00:15:24,793
- Well, good work, team!
Now who's driving me to drinks?
394
00:15:24,836 --> 00:15:27,056
Outta my way! Outta my way!
395
00:15:28,666 --> 00:15:30,755
- Okay, there's no key in here.
There is no key in here.
396
00:15:30,799 --> 00:15:32,235
That's just the first puzzle,
David.
397
00:15:32,279 --> 00:15:33,236
It's a series of puzzles.
398
00:15:33,549 --> 00:15:35,717
- What?!
- Wait, wait, everyone!
399
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:37,675
I hear my phone ringing.
400
00:15:37,719 --> 00:15:39,242
That's the phone
I was talking about.
401
00:15:39,286 --> 00:15:41,810
So if I could just leave
the lab for one minute...
402
00:15:41,853 --> 00:15:43,943
You have 52 minutes to escape.
403
00:15:44,369 --> 00:15:45,477
52 minutes!
404
00:15:45,502 --> 00:15:47,546
Hey, David, everyone heard
the time, all right?
405
00:15:47,571 --> 00:15:50,618
52, people!
Let's go! Come on!
406
00:15:51,987 --> 00:15:53,993
Blow on them, David! You have
to blow on the circles, David!
407
00:15:54,018 --> 00:15:56,042
You have to blow on the circles
until they're blue.
408
00:15:56,085 --> 00:15:58,087
- I'm blowing!
- Blow harder, David!
409
00:15:58,131 --> 00:16:00,394
- Oh my God, you blow on them!
You blow on the circles then!
410
00:16:00,437 --> 00:16:02,918
Use this! Use this thing!
411
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:05,094
- 'Kay, this is a good idea.
- 'Kay. Oh!
412
00:16:05,138 --> 00:16:06,443
- Oh my God!
- Yes!
413
00:16:06,487 --> 00:16:09,185
- Oh my God!
- Yes! Ahhh! Yes!
414
00:16:09,229 --> 00:16:11,127
One more! One more!
415
00:16:12,022 --> 00:16:13,328
Yay!
416
00:16:13,353 --> 00:16:14,625
It didn't do anything.
417
00:16:14,669 --> 00:16:17,106
Oh! Oh! It's uh...
418
00:16:17,150 --> 00:16:19,152
- What is that?
- It's a flashlight?
419
00:16:19,195 --> 00:16:21,545
Oh yeah! Oh my God,
this game is actually fun.
420
00:16:21,589 --> 00:16:23,156
See? I told you!
421
00:16:23,199 --> 00:16:24,722
You're only saying that
because you got one right!
422
00:16:24,766 --> 00:16:26,594
Oh, your time will come, David.
423
00:16:26,637 --> 00:16:29,640
- Please just give us the key.
- The key, or our phones!
424
00:16:29,684 --> 00:16:31,294
Either way!
- No, the key!
425
00:16:31,338 --> 00:16:33,949
John, what is this newfound
obsession with your device?
426
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:36,778
Dad, what's the big deal
with the phone?
427
00:16:36,821 --> 00:16:38,954
Just tell them, Mr. Rose.
428
00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:41,522
Okay. Well, I didn't want
to get ahead of myself,
429
00:16:41,565 --> 00:16:45,091
but I'm waiting on a call
from my old assistant.
430
00:16:45,134 --> 00:16:47,919
And we may have a meeting
to get an investor
431
00:16:47,963 --> 00:16:50,226
for the Rosebud Motel Group.
432
00:16:50,270 --> 00:16:52,446
Well, John, what,
what does this mean?
433
00:16:52,489 --> 00:16:56,058
Well, potentially, there
could be a big influx of money
434
00:16:56,102 --> 00:16:58,669
to turn Rosebud Motels into a...
435
00:16:58,713 --> 00:17:01,020
into a full franchise.
- Oh!
436
00:17:01,063 --> 00:17:03,500
Well, why didn't you say
this before? Get the phone!
437
00:17:03,544 --> 00:17:05,807
Oh, I don't know. we're
almost finished the game, so.
438
00:17:05,850 --> 00:17:08,592
- You can use my phone, John!
- You still have your phone?!
439
00:17:08,636 --> 00:17:10,986
We all have our phones!
440
00:17:11,166 --> 00:17:13,472
Well, his number's in my phone
441
00:17:13,497 --> 00:17:15,281
and my phone I can't get
442
00:17:15,513 --> 00:17:17,166
unless I get outta this
damn room!
443
00:17:17,228 --> 00:17:19,143
Okay, I've used the clues
444
00:17:19,168 --> 00:17:20,909
to turn the dials
on the flashlight,
445
00:17:20,952 --> 00:17:22,867
and it spells out England.
446
00:17:22,911 --> 00:17:24,695
So, thank you, my weekend
with Tom Hardy...
447
00:17:25,168 --> 00:17:27,475
England is here.
448
00:17:27,544 --> 00:17:29,126
It says something.
449
00:17:29,151 --> 00:17:32,285
"I'm tall when I'm young
and short when I'm old."
450
00:17:33,443 --> 00:17:34,705
Candle.
451
00:17:34,749 --> 00:17:37,012
How are you doing this?
452
00:17:38,208 --> 00:17:38,808
What?
453
00:17:38,833 --> 00:17:42,322
- Laser. Laser's pointing at...
- Okay, I got this, Patrick.
454
00:17:42,365 --> 00:17:45,325
Okay, this is an ancient
Egyptian symbol for stability.
455
00:17:45,368 --> 00:17:47,196
My friend Prairie got one
tattooed on her lower-back
456
00:17:47,240 --> 00:17:48,676
in seventh grade.
- Okay,
457
00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:50,373
what does that mean?!
458
00:17:50,417 --> 00:17:52,201
It means that we need to find
something from Egypt.
459
00:17:52,245 --> 00:17:54,943
So like mummies, Rami Malek,
a...
460
00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:58,077
a pyramid.
461
00:17:58,120 --> 00:17:59,556
What?!
462
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:02,951
- And there it is.
- Try it in the door!
463
00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:07,521
Congratulations!
464
00:18:07,564 --> 00:18:09,697
You have outwitted Darwin's
nemesis...
465
00:18:09,740 --> 00:18:12,395
Ah! Mummy and Alexis
solved the puzzle!
466
00:18:13,962 --> 00:18:15,746
- How did she do that?
- I dunno.
467
00:18:15,790 --> 00:18:17,966
I don't know how you did that.
468
00:18:18,009 --> 00:18:19,924
That was actually pretty
impressive, Alexis.
469
00:18:19,968 --> 00:18:21,752
Thanks! I just like wanted
to get to the drinks.
470
00:18:21,796 --> 00:18:23,798
- Uh-huh.
- Congratulations!
471
00:18:24,112 --> 00:18:25,940
Professor Darwin would be
very proud.
472
00:18:25,965 --> 00:18:27,880
Can I just have my phone,
please?
473
00:18:27,905 --> 00:18:29,429
Thank you.
474
00:18:32,119 --> 00:18:34,854
- Okay.
- Four voicemails!
475
00:18:35,226 --> 00:18:36,547
- Yes?
- Put it on speaker!
476
00:18:36,572 --> 00:18:38,135
Okay, is that the button
with the arrow?
477
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:39,645
That's the button that says
"speaker"!
478
00:18:39,670 --> 00:18:41,454
- Speaker button!
- Ooh!
479
00:18:41,686 --> 00:18:43,083
"John, call me when you can.
480
00:18:43,108 --> 00:18:45,245
We need an excuse to get out
of the escape room thing."
481
00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:47,562
- Okay, skip that. Skip it.
- I have something...
482
00:18:48,048 --> 00:18:49,698
"Hi, just reminding you
that you can't bail
483
00:18:49,723 --> 00:18:51,411
on the escape room thing,
even though all of us want..."
484
00:18:51,436 --> 00:18:52,792
Yeah, I don't think we need
to keep...
485
00:18:52,817 --> 00:18:54,198
I actually wanna hear that one.
486
00:18:54,223 --> 00:18:56,225
- I don't think so.
- "Johnny,
487
00:18:56,250 --> 00:18:57,766
it's Mike Morrison,
returning your call."
488
00:18:57,791 --> 00:18:59,227
- This is it!
- "Just read your proposal
489
00:18:59,252 --> 00:19:01,281
and I think it's a solid ide,
my friend.
490
00:19:01,306 --> 00:19:03,156
Would absolutely love to take
a meeting.
491
00:19:03,181 --> 00:19:04,922
Let's say 4pm Tuesday
at the New York office?"
492
00:19:05,025 --> 00:19:06,542
Oh my God!-
493
00:19:06,567 --> 00:19:08,130
- Did I just hear that?
- Oh, John!
494
00:19:08,155 --> 00:19:10,104
Did I just... is that what
he just said?!
495
00:19:10,129 --> 00:19:11,333
Oh my God!
496
00:19:13,099 --> 00:19:15,604
Oh!
497
00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:18,078
We got a meeting!
498
00:19:18,103 --> 00:19:19,713
- Oh-ho-ho!
- Yeah!
499
00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:21,791
- Why am I still holding this?
- Okay, okay.
500
00:19:21,816 --> 00:19:23,703
Thank you!
- We got a meeting!
501
00:19:29,833 --> 00:19:31,901
So, for someone who is
all about signs,
502
00:19:31,945 --> 00:19:33,860
what do you think it meant
that you were the one
503
00:19:33,903 --> 00:19:35,818
that got us out of
the Galapagos?
504
00:19:35,862 --> 00:19:37,907
Honestly? Like...
505
00:19:37,951 --> 00:19:39,859
being in a high-pressure
situation,
506
00:19:39,884 --> 00:19:41,930
with time running out and a lot
of people yelling at me,
507
00:19:41,955 --> 00:19:45,132
it just like... made me feel
like myself again.
508
00:19:45,175 --> 00:19:46,742
Well, mission accomplished.
509
00:19:46,786 --> 00:19:48,875
And you're out of your
sweatpants,
510
00:19:48,918 --> 00:19:51,616
so things are looking up.
511
00:19:51,660 --> 00:19:55,316
I think it might be time
to let go of that succulent.
512
00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:57,797
Okay, I've been thinking
about that.
513
00:19:57,840 --> 00:19:59,233
Do you think that maybe it died
514
00:19:59,276 --> 00:20:01,496
because it outgrew
its little pot?
515
00:20:02,627 --> 00:20:05,065
No, I watched you slowly
kill it.
516
00:20:05,108 --> 00:20:07,458
Like maybe it realized
that it...
517
00:20:07,502 --> 00:20:09,983
missed the bigger pots
that it used to grow in...
518
00:20:10,026 --> 00:20:12,899
and maybe it can't live up
to its full potential
519
00:20:12,942 --> 00:20:14,944
in such a small space?
520
00:20:17,120 --> 00:20:20,471
David, I'm starting to feel
that I'm a lot like the plant.
521
00:20:20,515 --> 00:20:22,256
I was tracking the metaphor,
522
00:20:22,299 --> 00:20:24,954
but um...
523
00:20:24,998 --> 00:20:26,695
what're you saying?
524
00:20:26,738 --> 00:20:29,312
- I don't know.
Like maybe it's time
525
00:20:29,337 --> 00:20:31,601
I think about being
somewhere else,
526
00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:36,618
finding a bigger pot to grow in.
527
00:20:36,661 --> 00:20:38,141
Oh...
528
00:20:41,666 --> 00:20:44,191
Before we find ourselves ebrious
529
00:20:44,234 --> 00:20:47,020
with hooch and happiness,
530
00:20:47,063 --> 00:20:51,546
may I say how very proud all
of us are on this day of days.
531
00:20:51,589 --> 00:20:53,591
Well, we did say no speeches,
so...
532
00:20:53,616 --> 00:20:55,357
- Your father...
- Guess they listened.
533
00:20:55,401 --> 00:20:59,238
With his pecuniary savvy
and in trepidation
534
00:20:59,263 --> 00:21:03,669
has turned what began as
a katzenjammer of a day
535
00:21:03,895 --> 00:21:06,449
into one filled with faith,
536
00:21:06,708 --> 00:21:08,057
hope and love.
537
00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:11,914
Well, thank you, Sweetheart.
538
00:21:12,134 --> 00:21:14,746
Well, I think we have
forgotten why we're here.
539
00:21:15,505 --> 00:21:17,444
It is our bachelor party.
540
00:21:17,469 --> 00:21:19,255
Also, whoever chose
those photos,
541
00:21:19,280 --> 00:21:21,848
they were not approved.
40693