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1
00:00:10,066 --> 00:00:11,400
You were huckin'
the ball around
2
00:00:11,433 --> 00:00:12,666
with your pals
the other day...
3
00:00:13,633 --> 00:00:15,266
Say, uh...
4
00:00:15,300 --> 00:00:17,800
What's the deal with your
sweetie there, Squirrely Dan?
5
00:00:17,833 --> 00:00:19,300
Well, I took her
out last night.
6
00:00:19,333 --> 00:00:22,166
‐Where to?
‐Outs to the chip truck.
7
00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:24,466
‐Fries and gravy?
‐I had mine with gravy.
8
00:00:24,500 --> 00:00:26,466
She had hers with
salts and malts vinegar.
9
00:00:26,500 --> 00:00:28,066
Do you know that
salt and malt vinegar's
10
00:00:28,100 --> 00:00:29,200
a non‐traditional way
to dress your French fries
11
00:00:29,233 --> 00:00:30,333
in the United States?
12
00:00:30,366 --> 00:00:31,766
What the fuck
is wrong with them?
13
00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:33,500
Like malt vinegar
is not a staple condiment
14
00:00:33,533 --> 00:00:35,600
on tabletops in restaurants
in the United States.
15
00:00:35,633 --> 00:00:36,700
Fuck, figure it out.
16
00:00:36,733 --> 00:00:38,266
That's what I say.
I say, figure it out.
17
00:00:38,300 --> 00:00:40,200
Got no vinegars on the tables,
no Krafts peanut butters.
18
00:00:40,233 --> 00:00:41,666
WAYNE: Figure it out.
DARYL: Fuckin' figure it out.
19
00:00:41,700 --> 00:00:43,700
Better not forget those
fuckin' all‐dressed chips.
20
00:00:43,733 --> 00:00:45,566
No ketchup chips neither.
21
00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:47,333
WAYNE: Figure it out.
22
00:00:47,366 --> 00:00:48,800
Somebody really
ought to write a letter.
23
00:00:48,833 --> 00:00:51,333
They do got six different
types of Cap'n Crunch, though.
24
00:00:51,366 --> 00:00:52,566
How do you know that?
25
00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:55,033
Saw a comedian talks about it
on the Juste Pour Rires.
26
00:00:55,066 --> 00:00:56,333
Can't remember
his name, though.
27
00:00:56,366 --> 00:00:57,533
Good guy, though?
28
00:00:57,566 --> 00:00:58,700
A little long‐winded
for my taste.
29
00:00:58,733 --> 00:01:00,333
But, yeah,
a pretty good guy.
30
00:01:00,366 --> 00:01:01,366
Well, glad to hear
he's a good guy at least.
31
00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:02,366
They have running water
down there?
32
00:01:03,433 --> 00:01:04,633
Anyhoo,
33
00:01:04,666 --> 00:01:06,466
the evening went
so well that, uh,
34
00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:08,733
we got up to a little bits
of a foolin' around.
35
00:01:08,766 --> 00:01:09,566
Did you French her?
36
00:01:09,600 --> 00:01:11,333
WAYNE: Kind of
out of line there, Dary.
37
00:01:11,366 --> 00:01:12,600
Did you go up her shirt?
38
00:01:12,633 --> 00:01:13,700
Now you're really
out of line, Dary.
39
00:01:13,733 --> 00:01:16,233
We did French,
that much I will reveal.
40
00:01:16,266 --> 00:01:17,733
Well, you already
revealed that much,
41
00:01:17,766 --> 00:01:19,433
might as well just tell us
if you went up her shirt.
42
00:01:19,466 --> 00:01:21,600
It's impolite
to kiss and tell, Dary.
43
00:01:21,633 --> 00:01:24,066
I don't like to
kiss and tell, but...
44
00:01:24,100 --> 00:01:25,633
The Frenchin's tooks
a hard left turn,
45
00:01:25,666 --> 00:01:27,066
from which I have
yets to recover.
46
00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:30,800
Do you wanna know what?
47
00:01:30,833 --> 00:01:33,033
I'm not asking you
to kiss and tell,
48
00:01:33,066 --> 00:01:34,266
'cause that's impolite.
49
00:01:34,300 --> 00:01:35,300
But...
50
00:01:36,266 --> 00:01:37,666
I'm kind of curious.
51
00:01:37,700 --> 00:01:39,500
Yeah, Dan, kiss and tell.
52
00:01:39,533 --> 00:01:43,066
I'm sure you boys have had
a couple of curve balls
53
00:01:43,100 --> 00:01:45,100
thrown your way
betwixt the sheets.
54
00:01:46,733 --> 00:01:49,566
Well, not to be impolite, but,
55
00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:52,300
you know, sometimes
a gal will be kissin' around
56
00:01:52,333 --> 00:01:54,533
on, like, the area
near your genitals,
57
00:01:54,566 --> 00:01:57,100
but not quite
on your genitals.
58
00:01:57,133 --> 00:01:58,500
Makes me ticklish
and insecure.
59
00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:02,200
You know,
not to be impolite,
60
00:02:02,233 --> 00:02:04,666
but sometimes a gal will do
some kissin' on the ears,
61
00:02:04,700 --> 00:02:06,033
which makes me uncomfortable,
62
00:02:06,066 --> 00:02:07,433
because even though
I clean my ears,
63
00:02:07,466 --> 00:02:09,366
sometimes a tater will just
roll out of there unexpected.
64
00:02:11,100 --> 00:02:12,333
(CHUCKLES)
65
00:02:12,366 --> 00:02:14,233
I kind of likes
both those things.
66
00:02:14,266 --> 00:02:15,733
Yeah, it's why you're called
"Squirrely Dan."
67
00:02:15,766 --> 00:02:17,400
Yeah, reason
fuckin' five million.
68
00:02:18,533 --> 00:02:20,500
Well, nots to be
impolite, but...
69
00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:24,066
This gal suggested that
70
00:02:25,733 --> 00:02:27,366
maybe I should have some
71
00:02:28,566 --> 00:02:30,033
attentions paid
72
00:02:32,066 --> 00:02:33,200
to my butts hole.
73
00:02:38,233 --> 00:02:39,366
That ever...
74
00:02:40,633 --> 00:02:42,766
Ever happen to you guys?
75
00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:45,033
Did you ever have a gal
suggest that you need
76
00:02:45,733 --> 00:02:47,133
some attentions paid
77
00:02:49,100 --> 00:02:50,333
to your butts holes?
78
00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:03,100
I'll take that as a hard no,
I guess?
79
00:03:04,366 --> 00:03:06,500
She put a couple of fingers
up there and...
80
00:03:08,633 --> 00:03:10,100
It turns out you got a...
81
00:03:10,133 --> 00:03:11,600
An erogenous zone up there.
82
00:03:11,633 --> 00:03:14,100
Found...
Found the hot button and...
83
00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:17,066
Gaves it a tickle and, uh...
84
00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:21,166
Yeah. Feels, uh...
85
00:03:22,233 --> 00:03:24,666
It feels pretty good,
you guys, okay?
86
00:03:24,700 --> 00:03:26,500
‐Pop fly.
‐I really liked it.
87
00:03:31,133 --> 00:03:33,133
It felt...
Felt very natural.
88
00:03:37,566 --> 00:03:38,433
Nice.
89
00:03:38,466 --> 00:03:40,100
That's how you get
the body in front of it.
90
00:03:40,133 --> 00:03:41,166
Get the body in front of it.
91
00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:42,766
They call it
"milking the prostate."
92
00:03:45,533 --> 00:03:47,433
Well, it's impolite
to kiss and tell.
93
00:03:48,333 --> 00:03:50,333
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
94
00:04:03,500 --> 00:04:05,766
‐Where's Stewart been, Katy?
‐He's not talking to me.
95
00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:07,533
‐Why?
‐I don't know.
96
00:04:07,566 --> 00:04:09,266
Here are your birthday
pancakes, big brother.
97
00:04:09,300 --> 00:04:10,566
Don't fuck with tradition.
98
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:11,633
‐Thank you.
‐You're welcome.
99
00:04:11,666 --> 00:04:13,200
BOTH: Happy birthday, Wayne.
100
00:04:13,233 --> 00:04:15,100
Jinx. You owe me
a Coke.
101
00:04:15,133 --> 00:04:16,433
Well, see now, that
you can get in the States.
102
00:04:16,466 --> 00:04:18,266
What you can't get, though,
is Crush Cream Soda.
103
00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:20,333
BOTH: We got you
a present, Wayne.
104
00:04:20,366 --> 00:04:21,800
Two Cokes.
105
00:04:21,833 --> 00:04:23,366
We don't make a thing of
birthdays in this family.
106
00:04:23,400 --> 00:04:24,733
Can we skip my super‐soft
birthday party then this year?
107
00:04:24,766 --> 00:04:26,400
Hard no!
108
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:28,100
It's not a birthday thing,
it's an efficiency thing.
109
00:04:28,133 --> 00:04:29,566
Uh, if you can be one thing,
you should be efficient.
110
00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:31,600
We got you an appointment
with a matchmaker.
111
00:04:31,633 --> 00:04:33,366
Get the... Take a...
112
00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:34,600
Well, start walkin'.
113
00:04:34,633 --> 00:04:36,166
Well, you won't
do online dating.
114
00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:38,333
There's no more MoDeans,
so you can't meet girls there.
115
00:04:38,366 --> 00:04:39,600
You're handcuffed, cowboy.
116
00:04:39,633 --> 00:04:41,066
‐Figure it out.
‐Yeah, figures it out.
117
00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:42,166
Don't you tell me
to figure it out.
118
00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:43,566
Yous are the ones
should figure it out.
119
00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:45,233
All you have to do is
sit down with a matchmaker,
120
00:04:45,266 --> 00:04:46,700
answer a few questions,
121
00:04:46,733 --> 00:04:48,600
and then she sets you up
on three dates with girls
122
00:04:48,633 --> 00:04:49,733
that she thinks
you'll jive with.
123
00:04:49,766 --> 00:04:51,400
Has anyone heard
from Jivin' Pete lately?
124
00:04:51,433 --> 00:04:52,800
Oh, yeah, yeah.
125
00:04:52,833 --> 00:04:54,466
No, Jivin' Pete's one nut
got all swole up...
126
00:04:54,500 --> 00:04:56,433
I don't give a shit about
Jivin' Pete's one nut.
127
00:04:56,466 --> 00:04:58,266
No, no, this is a story about
Jivin' Pete's other nut.
128
00:04:58,300 --> 00:04:59,533
Yeah, Jivin' Pete's
had himself
129
00:04:59,566 --> 00:05:01,366
a botched vasectomy
a little while back,
130
00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:02,733
so now his one nut's
there all swole up
131
00:05:02,766 --> 00:05:04,800
bigger than the first nut
that was all swole up.
132
00:05:04,833 --> 00:05:06,533
If you can believes
that nonsense.
133
00:05:06,566 --> 00:05:07,800
Was Jivin' showin' it
to people again?
134
00:05:07,833 --> 00:05:09,600
Oh, he's showin' it to people.
I seen it.
135
00:05:09,633 --> 00:05:11,266
‐You seen it, Dary?
‐Oh, I seen it.
136
00:05:11,300 --> 00:05:13,133
‐Yeah, I never seen it.
‐It looks like a rambutan.
137
00:05:13,166 --> 00:05:15,033
Which is to say,
this hairy fruit.
138
00:05:15,066 --> 00:05:16,166
So, not smooth
like a persimmon?
139
00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:18,333
DAN: No, although it is about
the size of a persimmons.
140
00:05:18,366 --> 00:05:20,133
Which, of course,
is much like a tomatoes.
141
00:05:20,166 --> 00:05:22,133
What sort of potent peace pipe
was some prick pulling off
142
00:05:22,166 --> 00:05:23,433
when he titled
tomatoes "fruits"?
143
00:05:24,333 --> 00:05:25,600
Well...
144
00:05:25,633 --> 00:05:27,733
Now both Jivin' Pete's nuts
have a story,
145
00:05:27,766 --> 00:05:30,366
which I hope guarantees
that I'll never have to listen
146
00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:32,533
to another story about
Jivin' Pete's nuts.
147
00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,333
‐He's a good guy.
‐He's a real good guy.
148
00:05:34,366 --> 00:05:35,633
‐No, he's a great guy.
‐Wayne.
149
00:05:35,666 --> 00:05:36,700
You're looking for love.
150
00:05:36,733 --> 00:05:38,200
And you said it yourself,
151
00:05:38,233 --> 00:05:40,066
"If you can be one thing,
be efficient."
152
00:05:40,100 --> 00:05:41,233
Do's it once, do's it rights.
153
00:05:41,266 --> 00:05:42,466
‐Figures it out.
‐Pitter patter,
154
00:05:42,500 --> 00:05:43,766
let's get at 'er,
figure it out.
155
00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:45,433
You shouldn't gang up
on people on their birthdays.
156
00:05:45,466 --> 00:05:47,466
We don't make a thing
of birthdays in this family.
157
00:05:47,500 --> 00:05:48,733
She's comin' this afternoon.
158
00:05:48,766 --> 00:05:50,200
Don't be in your
barnin' clothes.
159
00:05:50,233 --> 00:05:51,366
(SPOON SCRAPING)
160
00:05:56,500 --> 00:05:58,133
I fuckin' hate praccy, bro.
161
00:05:58,166 --> 00:06:00,700
It's Senior‐A whale shit, bro.
Why even praccy?
162
00:06:00,733 --> 00:06:02,700
Like, I'm just gonna praccy
like a donkey.
163
00:06:02,733 --> 00:06:04,066
I could donk all day.
164
00:06:04,100 --> 00:06:06,100
Just blast clappers
at the hash marks
165
00:06:06,133 --> 00:06:07,466
at the fuckin' plug tendy
of ours.
166
00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:09,166
Clappys from the hashys,
buddy.
167
00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:10,700
Just steppin' into one
from the ladies' tees.
168
00:06:10,733 --> 00:06:12,300
Just bulldoze that speed bump.
169
00:06:12,333 --> 00:06:13,600
Just firin' ringers
at his ears.
170
00:06:13,633 --> 00:06:14,733
Just firin' warm‐up ringers.
171
00:06:14,766 --> 00:06:16,766
Just tossin' chest‐high sauce
at the boys.
172
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:19,233
Just tossin' ankle‐high
rocket sauce.
173
00:06:19,266 --> 00:06:20,700
Just tossin' mad sui's
up the middle.
174
00:06:20,733 --> 00:06:22,366
Just tossin' mad sui's
through the trolley tracks.
175
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:24,133
Just tossin' mad
breakout sui's
176
00:06:24,166 --> 00:06:25,300
directly into the skates.
177
00:06:25,333 --> 00:06:27,133
Just tossin' mad
breakout sui's.
178
00:06:29,133 --> 00:06:30,433
You know, it might be
a fun praccy after all.
179
00:06:30,466 --> 00:06:32,433
I could donk all day, boys.
180
00:06:32,466 --> 00:06:33,766
(MUTTERING)
181
00:06:37,733 --> 00:06:41,333
I don't think I've ever
sat on a hay bale before.
182
00:06:41,366 --> 00:06:44,066
That's a straw bale,
and that's barley.
183
00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:47,066
Wonderful.
184
00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:48,566
Great. Um...
185
00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:50,133
So, a little bit about me.
186
00:06:50,166 --> 00:06:51,766
Uh, my service is called
187
00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:54,200
"Goldilocks and
the Three Dates."
188
00:06:54,233 --> 00:06:55,333
Katy...
189
00:06:55,366 --> 00:06:57,266
I forgot to tell her
not to tell you that.
190
00:06:57,300 --> 00:06:58,633
So, I've modeled my business
191
00:06:58,666 --> 00:07:01,700
after the charming story
that it's inspired by.
192
00:07:01,733 --> 00:07:04,233
I send my clients
on three dates,
193
00:07:04,266 --> 00:07:07,500
and like the beds that
Goldilocks laid down in
194
00:07:07,533 --> 00:07:10,633
after eating the three
bears' porridge,
195
00:07:10,666 --> 00:07:15,766
maybe one is "too hard,"
and maybe one is "too soft."
196
00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:20,466
But in the end we hope
that maybe one is just right.
197
00:07:20,500 --> 00:07:21,666
Katy...
198
00:07:21,700 --> 00:07:23,100
Get after it.
You're losin' him.
199
00:07:23,133 --> 00:07:25,466
Okay. Wayne,
why don't you just
200
00:07:25,500 --> 00:07:27,200
tell me a little bit
about yourself.
201
00:07:27,233 --> 00:07:29,233
It's impolite
to talk about yourself.
202
00:07:29,266 --> 00:07:32,333
Keeps his truck clean.
Loves his dogs.
203
00:07:32,366 --> 00:07:34,400
Enjoys a beer and a smoke.
204
00:07:34,433 --> 00:07:36,400
Beer...
Beer and smoke.
205
00:07:36,433 --> 00:07:38,266
That's... Wow, you know.
206
00:07:38,300 --> 00:07:39,700
I get it. Rustic.
207
00:07:39,733 --> 00:07:41,133
Trucks, got it.
208
00:07:41,166 --> 00:07:43,366
We will make this work.
I love it, okay.
209
00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:45,066
And then, um, Wayne,
can you just tell me
210
00:07:45,100 --> 00:07:47,466
a little bit about
your past relationship?
211
00:07:47,500 --> 00:07:49,433
You shouldn't air
your dirty laundry.
212
00:07:49,466 --> 00:07:51,266
Five years.
Ended a while ago.
213
00:07:51,300 --> 00:07:52,466
No baggage.
214
00:07:52,500 --> 00:07:55,433
No baggage, love that.
No baggage, no babies.
215
00:07:55,466 --> 00:07:57,133
Likey.
(LAUGHING)
216
00:07:58,200 --> 00:07:59,233
This is fun.
217
00:07:59,266 --> 00:08:02,200
I'm having a fun time
in this place.
218
00:08:02,233 --> 00:08:03,533
And, Wayne,
can you tell me
219
00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:04,766
how much you make
in a fiscal year?
220
00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:06,066
WAYNE: Katy!
221
00:08:06,100 --> 00:08:07,633
It's impolite to talk
about your money.
222
00:08:07,666 --> 00:08:08,766
He's no slouch.
223
00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,600
Okay. Touche.
224
00:08:10,633 --> 00:08:14,466
Well, I'm about
to begin your story.
225
00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:17,233
Where maybe one is "too hard."
226
00:08:17,266 --> 00:08:20,600
Maybe one is, um...
227
00:08:20,633 --> 00:08:23,100
‐But in the end...
‐Yeah, you lost him.
228
00:08:24,166 --> 00:08:25,633
He seems...
He seems nice.
229
00:08:28,133 --> 00:08:29,533
Do you live...
230
00:08:29,566 --> 00:08:30,733
Do you live in here?
231
00:08:31,733 --> 00:08:33,066
So, what did you think of
232
00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:35,066
Goldilocks and the Three Dates
there, Wayne?
233
00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:36,633
Ready to fall in Goldi‐love?
234
00:08:37,366 --> 00:08:39,466
Or Goldi‐lust?
235
00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:42,200
You won't be Goldi‐laughin'
when I break your Goldi‐legs.
236
00:08:42,233 --> 00:08:43,500
Dim the Goldi‐lights?
237
00:08:43,533 --> 00:08:46,200
Nights of your Goldi‐life?
238
00:08:46,233 --> 00:08:48,433
Use your Goldi‐language.
Make her Goldi‐laugh.
239
00:08:48,466 --> 00:08:49,766
Make it Goldi‐last.
240
00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,300
Better Goldi‐lay off,
before they find
241
00:08:51,333 --> 00:08:52,733
your Goldi‐limbs
in a Goldi‐landfill,
242
00:08:52,766 --> 00:08:54,733
Goldi‐literally.
243
00:08:54,766 --> 00:08:56,133
Take her on a Goldi‐lunch?
244
00:08:56,166 --> 00:08:57,700
Maybe a Goldi‐late suppers?
245
00:08:58,833 --> 00:09:01,066
‐Maybe she's a Goldi‐lawyer.
‐Ooh.
246
00:09:01,100 --> 00:09:03,266
You think I'm Goldi‐lyin'?
Enough Goldi‐lip.
247
00:09:03,300 --> 00:09:05,133
A Goldi‐longshoresman
will find your bodies
248
00:09:05,166 --> 00:09:06,233
in the Goldi‐lake!
249
00:09:07,633 --> 00:09:11,166
Gentlemen, a question.
A query.
250
00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:14,066
‐An inquis...
‐Pitter patter.
251
00:09:14,100 --> 00:09:16,700
Has Katy mentioned anything
about me not talking to her?
252
00:09:16,733 --> 00:09:19,066
‐Can confirm.
‐Major league.
253
00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:20,433
‐It's working.
‐What's working?
254
00:09:20,466 --> 00:09:22,066
By not talking to her,
she will form the conclusion
255
00:09:22,100 --> 00:09:24,666
that I'm upset with her
and eventually ask me why.
256
00:09:24,700 --> 00:09:26,133
Why you so butt‐hurt, Stewart?
257
00:09:27,666 --> 00:09:28,700
‐Well, she acts like...
‐Just kidding.
258
00:09:28,733 --> 00:09:30,233
‐I don't give a fuck.
‐DAN: Wait.
259
00:09:30,266 --> 00:09:31,300
So, you're upsets with her,
260
00:09:31,333 --> 00:09:34,300
and you wanna communicate that
by not communicatings?
261
00:09:34,333 --> 00:09:36,100
Acutely.
262
00:09:36,133 --> 00:09:38,166
You are spare parts,
aren't you, bud?
263
00:09:39,833 --> 00:09:41,466
Let me know
if Katy asks about me.
264
00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:45,166
Heads up!
265
00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:46,266
Ow!
266
00:09:49,766 --> 00:09:51,200
(MUSIC PLAYING)
267
00:10:01,766 --> 00:10:03,166
I'm Kim.
268
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:04,500
I'm a psychologist
and a feminist.
269
00:10:04,533 --> 00:10:06,266
‐I'll be paying the bill.
‐I'm Wayne.
270
00:10:07,166 --> 00:10:08,200
Wayne!
271
00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:09,466
Glen.
How are you now?
272
00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:11,600
‐Ah, good and you?
‐Oh, not so bad.
273
00:10:11,633 --> 00:10:14,133
Well, I guess the kitten's
out of the clutch on this one.
274
00:10:14,166 --> 00:10:16,300
I also have
to work as a waitress
275
00:10:16,333 --> 00:10:17,366
to make ends meet.
276
00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:18,766
‐WAYNE: Sure you do.
‐I'm Kim.
277
00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:20,066
Are you ever.
278
00:10:20,100 --> 00:10:21,533
Look at you.
I'm lovin' this.
279
00:10:21,566 --> 00:10:23,366
You're like a shark.
I'm scared.
280
00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,500
Like a Julie Moore,
or like a Jessie Chastain.
281
00:10:25,533 --> 00:10:27,766
‐What can I get you to drink?
‐Uh, we'll need a minute.
282
00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:30,066
Uh, please and thank you.
283
00:10:30,100 --> 00:10:31,200
Hmm. All right.
284
00:10:31,233 --> 00:10:33,166
Well, you'll take care of
little Miss Nicki Kidman here
285
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:35,033
till I get back,
Mr. McConaughey?
286
00:10:35,066 --> 00:10:36,233
‐Sure, I will.
‐All right.
287
00:10:38,233 --> 00:10:40,033
He crosses his arms.
288
00:10:40,066 --> 00:10:42,100
Are you aware of
the psychology behind that?
289
00:10:42,133 --> 00:10:43,166
Now, when you say "he,"
290
00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:44,566
you're talking
about me, right?
291
00:10:44,600 --> 00:10:46,133
He has wit.
292
00:10:46,166 --> 00:10:47,633
Do you know why
you cross your arms?
293
00:10:47,666 --> 00:10:49,700
Feels like you're talking
to two people right now.
294
00:10:49,733 --> 00:10:51,266
Crossing your arms,
295
00:10:51,300 --> 00:10:52,600
whether it be consciously
or subconsciously,
296
00:10:52,633 --> 00:10:54,100
is a sign of defense.
297
00:10:54,133 --> 00:10:55,700
You're protecting
your vital organs.
298
00:10:55,733 --> 00:10:57,033
Do you feel threatened by me?
299
00:10:57,066 --> 00:10:58,700
Well, I don't,
but the other guy might.
300
00:10:58,733 --> 00:11:00,733
He is hilarious.
301
00:11:00,766 --> 00:11:02,533
Enough psychology for now.
302
00:11:02,566 --> 00:11:04,500
What do you know
about feminism, Wayne?
303
00:11:04,533 --> 00:11:06,800
I know it's unsafe territory
to discuss with a feminist.
304
00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:08,433
‐Why?
‐Someone will start shoutin'.
305
00:11:08,466 --> 00:11:10,300
‐Why?
‐I don't know.
306
00:11:10,333 --> 00:11:12,433
Feminism is the belief
that women and men
307
00:11:12,466 --> 00:11:14,733
should have equal rights
and opportunities.
308
00:11:14,766 --> 00:11:16,600
So, are you a feminist, Wayne?
309
00:11:16,633 --> 00:11:18,233
Well, I trust my sister
310
00:11:18,266 --> 00:11:20,800
with just about any job
under the sun over a man.
311
00:11:20,833 --> 00:11:22,700
‐But 'cept this one, I guess.
‐Excuse me?
312
00:11:22,733 --> 00:11:25,266
Not to be impolite but you're
not exposed to talk about sex,
313
00:11:25,300 --> 00:11:27,733
politics or religion
at the supper table.
314
00:11:27,766 --> 00:11:30,200
(SIGHING)
What do you want, Wayne?
315
00:11:30,233 --> 00:11:32,800
‐I'd have a Gus'n Bru, likely.
‐Not what I'm asking.
316
00:11:32,833 --> 00:11:34,566
What's a Gus'n Bru?
317
00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:36,433
Ooh!
I'll google it and find out.
318
00:11:36,466 --> 00:11:38,166
I'm kiddin'.
I know exactly what it is.
319
00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:39,600
But we don't have any.
320
00:11:39,633 --> 00:11:40,800
So, what can
I get you to drink?
321
00:11:40,833 --> 00:11:43,100
I'll have a Caesar
and he'll have a...
322
00:11:43,133 --> 00:11:44,466
Pint of lager, please.
Something local.
323
00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:45,733
‐Thank you.
‐GLEN: All right.
324
00:11:45,766 --> 00:11:47,766
So, a local lager
for Mr. Brando
325
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,566
and a Caesar
for Sandy Bullock.
326
00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:51,433
I love those orders.
Be right back.
327
00:11:52,700 --> 00:11:54,600
I didn't think they'd have it
at Four Dancers.
328
00:11:54,633 --> 00:11:57,333
Yes, I didn't think they'd
have it at this resto‐bar.
329
00:11:57,366 --> 00:11:59,600
‐Gastro‐pub.
‐Says "resto‐bar" on the sign.
330
00:11:59,633 --> 00:12:01,200
It's more of a micro‐bistro.
331
00:12:01,233 --> 00:12:03,333
Says brasserie on the menu
right there, too.
332
00:12:03,366 --> 00:12:05,166
It's more of
a bistro‐brasserie.
333
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:06,600
When I came in
they asked me if I wanted
334
00:12:06,633 --> 00:12:08,500
to sit at the resto‐bar
or the gastro‐lounge.
335
00:12:08,533 --> 00:12:10,066
I'm glad you chose
the resto‐bar.
336
00:12:10,100 --> 00:12:11,566
This is actually
the gastro‐lounge.
337
00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:16,733
Do you know what
an emergency call is, Wayne?
338
00:12:16,766 --> 00:12:18,766
‐Negative.
‐It's when you have a friend
339
00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:21,533
call 10, 15 minutes
into a date
340
00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:23,366
to be sure the date
isn't a total bust.
341
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:26,066
And if it is, then you can
play the phone call
342
00:12:26,100 --> 00:12:28,166
as though it's an emergency
and leave the date.
343
00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:29,500
Well, that's fair.
344
00:12:29,533 --> 00:12:30,766
I guess we are first cousin
to an emergency here.
345
00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:32,200
A good one.
346
00:12:32,233 --> 00:12:34,066
And you shouldn't
be afraid of it.
347
00:12:34,100 --> 00:12:36,000
I think we could do
good things here.
348
00:12:36,766 --> 00:12:39,033
I'm going to call my friend
349
00:12:39,066 --> 00:12:41,500
and cancel
her pending emergency call,
350
00:12:41,533 --> 00:12:43,466
and when I get back,
351
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:45,666
let's talk about
your feelings, Wayne.
352
00:12:45,700 --> 00:12:49,066
‐Okay.
‐Let's really talk about them.
353
00:12:49,100 --> 00:12:51,233
‐Okay.
‐I wanna take 'em,
354
00:12:51,266 --> 00:12:53,000
and I wanna talk about them.
355
00:13:10,466 --> 00:13:12,233
Oh, it's Wayne.
How are you now?
356
00:13:12,766 --> 00:13:14,100
Oh, not so bad.
357
00:13:14,133 --> 00:13:16,000
Yeah, this one's too hard.
358
00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:22,480
(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)
359
00:13:22,513 --> 00:13:24,947
We don't have time
to discuss that business.
360
00:13:28,813 --> 00:13:29,813
Devon.
361
00:13:33,913 --> 00:13:35,780
Stewart.
362
00:13:35,813 --> 00:13:38,180
I come in peace.
363
00:13:38,213 --> 00:13:39,480
How do we know
you don't have another one
364
00:13:39,513 --> 00:13:40,547
of those in your sock?
365
00:13:40,580 --> 00:13:41,813
You don't.
366
00:13:44,213 --> 00:13:46,247
Speak.
Do not approach.
367
00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:48,913
‐Seen Katy around?
‐No.
368
00:13:48,947 --> 00:13:51,047
‐That is all.
‐(GROWLING) Stewart!
369
00:13:53,547 --> 00:13:55,180
Trouble in paradise?
370
00:13:55,213 --> 00:13:57,313
If there was,
she wouldn't know it.
371
00:13:57,347 --> 00:13:58,880
I'm not talking to her.
372
00:13:58,913 --> 00:14:00,780
Well played.
Wait it out.
373
00:14:00,813 --> 00:14:02,013
That way she'll come
to the conclusion that
374
00:14:02,047 --> 00:14:03,413
you're upset with her
and ask you why.
375
00:14:03,447 --> 00:14:05,513
‐Precisely.
‐She should anyway.
376
00:14:05,547 --> 00:14:07,180
‐If she's smart.
‐I know.
377
00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:09,180
‐Why are you mad at her?
‐She acts like...
378
00:14:09,213 --> 00:14:10,347
You should try
an open relationship.
379
00:14:11,347 --> 00:14:12,547
Could be productive.
380
00:14:12,580 --> 00:14:13,780
You could also
try a hall pass.
381
00:14:13,813 --> 00:14:14,680
It's when you give, you know,
382
00:14:14,713 --> 00:14:16,080
her being allowed
to sleep with one person
383
00:14:16,113 --> 00:14:18,113
and that's it,
no questions asked.
384
00:14:18,147 --> 00:14:19,547
Another plausibly
fruitful option.
385
00:14:19,580 --> 00:14:21,513
New GTA and COD out today.
386
00:14:21,547 --> 00:14:23,313
We're going to sesh.
387
00:14:23,347 --> 00:14:25,080
‐Been gaming much?
‐Always gaming.
388
00:14:26,013 --> 00:14:27,313
‐You?
‐Just gamed.
389
00:14:27,347 --> 00:14:29,247
Stimulating morning game.
390
00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:30,447
Evening game will eclipse.
391
00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:31,847
I gamed a 4:00‐to‐4:00 shift
last night.
392
00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:33,013
You're gaming
taxi driver's hours?
393
00:14:33,047 --> 00:14:34,280
I gamed a 10:00‐to‐4:00 shift
today.
394
00:14:34,313 --> 00:14:35,847
Gaming banker's hours.
395
00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:37,913
I'll probably game
a 5:00‐to‐7:00 shift now.
396
00:14:37,947 --> 00:14:39,947
Cinq a sept.
Nous aussi.
397
00:14:40,980 --> 00:14:42,413
You guys wanna hit up
a happy hour?
398
00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:47,480
We're gonna hit
another happy hour.
399
00:14:52,813 --> 00:14:53,947
(MUSIC PLAYING)
400
00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:57,180
Heads up!
401
00:14:57,213 --> 00:14:58,813
‐STEWART: Ow!
‐(CAR HORN BLARING)
402
00:15:16,980 --> 00:15:18,080
I'm Lisa.
403
00:15:19,413 --> 00:15:20,413
Wayne.
404
00:15:24,947 --> 00:15:26,547
GLEN: Wayne!
405
00:15:26,580 --> 00:15:28,447
‐Glen, how are you now?
‐Good and you?
406
00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:30,313
‐Not so bad.
‐Well, I guess the teddy's
407
00:15:30,347 --> 00:15:31,913
out of the tickle trunk
on this one, too.
408
00:15:31,947 --> 00:15:33,847
I also work here.
409
00:15:33,880 --> 00:15:36,547
Reason is the Salty Treat
blew out an amp the other day,
410
00:15:36,580 --> 00:15:38,947
rockin' out pretty hard
to some Lifehouse covers,
411
00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:39,980
which will happen.
412
00:15:40,013 --> 00:15:41,347
So, I'm pickin' up the slack.
I'm happy to do it.
413
00:15:41,380 --> 00:15:42,847
Way she goes.
414
00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:44,180
I'm Lisa.
415
00:15:44,213 --> 00:15:46,047
Are you ever.
Look at you!
416
00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:47,880
It's America's little
sweetheart over here.
417
00:15:47,913 --> 00:15:49,147
You're like
a little Katy Heigl
418
00:15:49,180 --> 00:15:51,347
or like a little Katy Hudson.
419
00:15:51,380 --> 00:15:52,513
What can I get ya?
420
00:15:52,547 --> 00:15:53,947
Do you have cookies and cream?
421
00:15:53,980 --> 00:15:55,047
Do I...
(LAUGHS)
422
00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:56,247
Do I have cookies and cream?
423
00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:58,047
I sure do have
cookies and cream.
424
00:15:58,080 --> 00:16:01,913
(SIGHS) And I'm thinkin' maybe
a vanilla‐fudge swirl chunk
425
00:16:01,947 --> 00:16:03,247
for Mr. Newman over here?
426
00:16:03,280 --> 00:16:04,847
‐That'll do, thank you.
‐Okay.
427
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,547
And you're gonna keep an eye
on little Caty Blanchett here
428
00:16:06,580 --> 00:16:07,813
‐for me till I get back?
‐Sure will.
429
00:16:07,847 --> 00:16:09,280
Thank you! Be right back!
430
00:16:11,213 --> 00:16:13,847
‐So, you're a farmer, Wayne?
‐Can confirm.
431
00:16:13,880 --> 00:16:15,080
You don't smell like one.
432
00:16:15,113 --> 00:16:17,380
(CHUCKLES) I'm kidding.
433
00:16:17,413 --> 00:16:19,380
I'm a pre‐school principal.
Do you like kids?
434
00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:21,447
‐Hmm...
‐I know, everyone likes kids.
435
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:22,780
They're so silly.
436
00:16:22,813 --> 00:16:24,347
I love them
when they're silly.
437
00:16:24,380 --> 00:16:27,813
But if they get too silly,
they have to come see me.
438
00:16:27,847 --> 00:16:28,913
‐"Silly"?
‐Mischief.
439
00:16:28,947 --> 00:16:30,813
‐Trouble.
‐We use gentler terms.
440
00:16:30,847 --> 00:16:31,780
As a policy.
441
00:16:31,813 --> 00:16:33,780
Well, so what happens
when they come see you?
442
00:16:33,813 --> 00:16:36,480
Well, we do things a little
differently in our program.
443
00:16:36,513 --> 00:16:39,113
The approach is progressive
and positive.
444
00:16:39,147 --> 00:16:41,047
We issue
a hug consent form to parents,
445
00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:42,513
which allows us
to hug their kids.
446
00:16:42,547 --> 00:16:46,847
Because 99% of the time,
all kids need is a hug.
447
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:47,913
‐"A hug"?
‐A squeeze.
448
00:16:47,947 --> 00:16:48,980
Well, you squeeze 'em.
449
00:16:49,013 --> 00:16:50,180
‐An embrace.
‐Oh.
450
00:16:50,213 --> 00:16:51,813
‐Oh?
‐Well...
451
00:16:51,847 --> 00:16:53,047
‐What is it?
‐Nothin'.
452
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:54,280
‐Wayne.
‐Yeah?
453
00:16:54,313 --> 00:16:56,313
‐Speak freely.
‐No, I'd better not.
454
00:16:56,347 --> 00:16:58,880
That's the only way
we'll get to know each other.
455
00:16:58,913 --> 00:17:00,313
But do you ever smack 'em?
456
00:17:00,347 --> 00:17:02,513
‐Excuse me?
‐Like, give 'em a good whack?
457
00:17:02,547 --> 00:17:05,447
‐I don't follow.
‐Do you ever hit the kid?
458
00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:07,313
Like, for being too silly.
459
00:17:07,347 --> 00:17:09,213
No! Wayne.
460
00:17:09,247 --> 00:17:11,913
We never hit our kids.
You shouldn't hit kids.
461
00:17:11,947 --> 00:17:13,080
Well, you know what,
462
00:17:13,113 --> 00:17:14,513
don't you remember
how scared you were
463
00:17:14,547 --> 00:17:16,180
of your principal
when you were growing up?
464
00:17:16,213 --> 00:17:17,447
It's 'cause he'd smack you
if you were being too silly.
465
00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:18,880
Like your parents
wanted you
466
00:17:18,913 --> 00:17:20,213
to have a principal
who would smack you.
467
00:17:20,247 --> 00:17:21,813
They took comfort in the fact
468
00:17:21,847 --> 00:17:23,047
that they were sending you
to a place every day
469
00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:24,847
where someone would
smack you for them
470
00:17:24,880 --> 00:17:26,047
if you were being
too silly.
471
00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:27,313
And sometimes
I see kids these days,
472
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:28,347
I kind of think, like...
473
00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,280
Like, wish you could
still do that.
474
00:17:31,313 --> 00:17:33,513
That sort of discipline
is long outdated, Wayne,
475
00:17:33,547 --> 00:17:34,980
and frowned upon.
476
00:17:35,013 --> 00:17:36,047
We sit the child down...
477
00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:37,813
‐That's another problem.
‐What is?
478
00:17:37,847 --> 00:17:39,380
‐In my opinion.
‐Sitting?
479
00:17:39,413 --> 00:17:41,147
Well, no wonder
kids are failin' school,
480
00:17:41,180 --> 00:17:42,413
just sittin' around all day.
481
00:17:42,447 --> 00:17:44,013
Stand up,
you're not doing nothin'.
482
00:17:44,047 --> 00:17:45,313
You think sitting
is a problem?
483
00:17:45,347 --> 00:17:46,780
‐Yeah.
‐Why?
484
00:17:46,813 --> 00:17:48,147
'Cause it makes you soft.
485
00:17:48,180 --> 00:17:51,147
‐Literally or figuratively?
‐Well, both, I suppose.
486
00:17:51,180 --> 00:17:52,913
‐Both?
‐Yeah.
487
00:17:52,947 --> 00:17:54,280
In my opinion.
488
00:17:54,313 --> 00:17:55,413
My phone's buzzing.
489
00:17:57,913 --> 00:17:59,947
Well, so you like cookies
and cream ice cream, hey?
490
00:17:59,980 --> 00:18:01,147
Well, I think
it's pretty good, too.
491
00:18:01,180 --> 00:18:02,347
Hi, Michelle.
492
00:18:02,913 --> 00:18:04,147
Oh, no.
493
00:18:04,180 --> 00:18:06,380
Okay,
I'll be right there.
494
00:18:06,413 --> 00:18:08,113
I'm sorry, Wayne,
I've gotta go.
495
00:18:08,147 --> 00:18:09,947
‐It's...
‐An emergency.
496
00:18:09,980 --> 00:18:11,180
‐Yeah.
‐Okay.
497
00:18:23,547 --> 00:18:25,180
It's Wayne.
498
00:18:25,213 --> 00:18:26,780
Well, how are you now?
499
00:18:26,813 --> 00:18:28,180
Oh, not so bad.
500
00:18:28,213 --> 00:18:29,947
Yeah, this one's too soft.
501
00:18:31,947 --> 00:18:33,147
(SCOFFING)
502
00:18:38,813 --> 00:18:40,413
(SIGHING)
503
00:18:45,813 --> 00:18:47,280
(SIGHING CONTINUES)
504
00:18:48,547 --> 00:18:50,147
(GROANING)
505
00:18:58,180 --> 00:18:59,947
(SIGHING)
506
00:19:04,147 --> 00:19:05,380
What?
507
00:19:05,413 --> 00:19:06,780
(SCOFFS)
508
00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:08,147
I'm not talking to you.
509
00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:09,280
Super.
510
00:19:10,447 --> 00:19:12,147
‐(SIGHS)
‐It's been three days.
511
00:19:12,180 --> 00:19:13,847
Why haven't you asked me
what's wrong?
512
00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:16,213
‐Something wrong?
‐Of course it is.
513
00:19:16,247 --> 00:19:18,780
‐You act like I don't...
‐Should I have known that?
514
00:19:18,813 --> 00:19:20,447
It's called
"the silent treatment."
515
00:19:20,480 --> 00:19:22,313
Step one,
I stop talking to you.
516
00:19:22,347 --> 00:19:23,913
Step two,
you form the conclusion
517
00:19:23,947 --> 00:19:25,047
that something is wrong.
518
00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:27,413
Step three,
you ask me what's wrong.
519
00:19:27,447 --> 00:19:28,813
What's up with step one?
520
00:19:28,847 --> 00:19:30,047
You've skipped
step one and two.
521
00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:31,780
What's step three again?
522
00:19:31,813 --> 00:19:33,880
You ask me what's wrong!
523
00:19:33,913 --> 00:19:34,913
Got it.
524
00:19:35,513 --> 00:19:36,847
Good.
525
00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:37,880
You bet.
526
00:19:39,913 --> 00:19:40,980
Go ahead.
527
00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:42,947
Where?
528
00:19:42,980 --> 00:19:44,913
‐Step three.
‐What's step three again?
529
00:19:44,947 --> 00:19:46,313
(EXHALES)
530
00:19:46,347 --> 00:19:48,147
We'll skip step three.
531
00:19:48,180 --> 00:19:49,880
I'm just going to tell you
what's wrong.
532
00:19:49,913 --> 00:19:51,213
That should have
been step one.
533
00:19:51,247 --> 00:19:53,880
Wrong. Step one and two
are fundamental steps.
534
00:19:53,913 --> 00:19:56,113
You missed steps, Stewart.
535
00:19:56,147 --> 00:19:57,513
How?
536
00:19:57,547 --> 00:20:00,080
Step one,
become angry with someone.
537
00:20:00,113 --> 00:20:03,180
Step two, tell that someone
that you're angry.
538
00:20:03,213 --> 00:20:05,913
Step three, resolve anger
with that someone.
539
00:20:05,947 --> 00:20:07,547
‐Step four...
‐(SCOFFING) Step four.
540
00:20:07,580 --> 00:20:10,813
Step four,
resume peaceful existence.
541
00:20:13,947 --> 00:20:16,947
Your logic is
frighteningly bewitching.
542
00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:19,447
Phantasmagoric.
543
00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:21,080
It's time for you to go.
544
00:20:22,413 --> 00:20:23,413
What?
545
00:20:24,180 --> 00:20:25,380
Where?
546
00:20:25,413 --> 00:20:26,413
Leave here?
547
00:20:27,247 --> 00:20:28,780
It was a rebound.
548
00:20:28,813 --> 00:20:30,880
Even though there was no
physical act of rebounding,
549
00:20:30,913 --> 00:20:32,280
which is a first for me.
550
00:20:32,313 --> 00:20:33,447
(SCOFFS) Gross.
551
00:20:35,480 --> 00:20:36,913
Seriously, Katy.
552
00:20:38,047 --> 00:20:39,047
W5.
553
00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:42,213
No one has time for
the silent treatment, Stewart.
554
00:20:42,247 --> 00:20:43,947
Not even in Letterkenny.
555
00:20:43,980 --> 00:20:45,147
Adios.
556
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:55,847
(MUSIC PLAYING)
557
00:20:59,847 --> 00:21:01,113
‐DAN: Heads up!
‐(LAUGHS)
558
00:21:01,147 --> 00:21:02,880
Nice try, shirt‐tuckers!
559
00:21:04,347 --> 00:21:05,413
(DARYL SNICKERS)
560
00:21:07,413 --> 00:21:09,047
Ow!
561
00:21:09,080 --> 00:21:10,813
(WAILING)
562
00:21:18,813 --> 00:21:20,213
(MUSIC PLAYING)
563
00:21:45,180 --> 00:21:46,347
Hi, Wayne.
564
00:21:47,213 --> 00:21:48,347
Angie.
565
00:21:50,580 --> 00:21:51,780
Wayne!
566
00:21:53,413 --> 00:21:56,180
Oh, my gourd,
what a coincidence.
567
00:21:56,213 --> 00:21:58,047
Oh, I bet you're thinkin'
I work here.
568
00:21:58,080 --> 00:21:59,113
I don't work here.
569
00:21:59,147 --> 00:22:00,780
I just love Guy's fries.
570
00:22:00,813 --> 00:22:02,780
They're so crispy,
and you add a little salt...
571
00:22:02,813 --> 00:22:04,213
(LAUGHS) I just think
they're so delicious.
572
00:22:05,247 --> 00:22:07,447
Ooh! Who is this?
573
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:09,113
You're a masterpiece,
aren't ya?
574
00:22:09,147 --> 00:22:12,413
You're like a Shelly Pfeiffer,
you're like a Charlie Theron,
575
00:22:12,447 --> 00:22:13,947
or like a Penny Cruz.
576
00:22:13,980 --> 00:22:15,047
Ooh!
577
00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:16,247
You're like
a little Angie Jolie.
578
00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:18,080
That's who you are,
you're Angie.
579
00:22:18,113 --> 00:22:19,347
How are you now?
580
00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:21,780
‐Good and you?
‐Not so bad.
581
00:22:21,813 --> 00:22:22,980
Can we talk?
582
00:22:23,013 --> 00:22:24,313
‐Okay.
‐"Talk."
583
00:22:26,147 --> 00:22:27,180
In your truck.
584
00:22:30,347 --> 00:22:31,347
Okay.
585
00:22:33,147 --> 00:22:34,947
Now that was just right.
586
00:22:35,547 --> 00:22:37,313
(EXHALES)
587
00:22:37,347 --> 00:22:39,413
So how did you make out,
super chief?
588
00:22:39,447 --> 00:22:41,013
Did you find the missing
Goldi‐link?
589
00:22:41,047 --> 00:22:42,347
You fallin' in Goldi‐love?
590
00:22:42,380 --> 00:22:43,413
It's better
to Goldi‐let this go,
591
00:22:43,447 --> 00:22:44,880
before I Goldi‐lose my shit.
592
00:22:44,913 --> 00:22:46,847
Oh, take your drink,
you Goldi‐lush.
593
00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:48,080
Tread Goldi‐lightly.
594
00:22:49,447 --> 00:22:50,913
So, that's no
toe‐curlin' then?
595
00:22:50,947 --> 00:22:52,280
It's impolite
to kiss and tell.
596
00:22:52,313 --> 00:22:53,947
Nothin' wrong with a little
stank on the hang down.
597
00:22:53,980 --> 00:22:55,480
Nothin' wrong with a little
takesin' out in the trades.
598
00:22:55,513 --> 00:22:57,080
A little hizzin'
in the skizzins.
599
00:22:57,113 --> 00:22:58,213
No, I know there's
nothin' wrong with a little
600
00:22:58,247 --> 00:22:59,447
goin' to the bone yard,
I know that.
601
00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:01,047
Nothin' wrong with
a little bacon makin'.
602
00:23:01,080 --> 00:23:02,780
Nothin' wrong with a little
shot twixt winds and waters.
603
00:23:02,813 --> 00:23:04,413
A little building
the blanket monster.
604
00:23:04,447 --> 00:23:06,180
I know there's nothin' wrong
with a little pituitary poke.
605
00:23:06,213 --> 00:23:07,813
‐I know that.
‐Nothin' wrong with a little
606
00:23:07,847 --> 00:23:09,313
makin' the beast
with two backs.
607
00:23:09,347 --> 00:23:11,047
Makin' feet
for children's stockin's.
608
00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:12,080
Testing the tube steak.
609
00:23:12,113 --> 00:23:13,280
Look, I know
there's nothin' wrong
610
00:23:13,313 --> 00:23:14,480
with a little crawl
up the skin slide.
611
00:23:14,513 --> 00:23:16,447
‐I know that.
‐Nothin' wrong with a little,
612
00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:19,547
"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!"
613
00:23:19,580 --> 00:23:21,180
Now just pump the brakes
right there.
614
00:23:21,213 --> 00:23:22,913
‐I got a question.
‐Have at 'er.
615
00:23:22,947 --> 00:23:24,047
Then I got a comment.
616
00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:25,047
Well, let's hear it,
good buddy.
617
00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:26,280
Now, my question.
618
00:23:26,313 --> 00:23:27,413
When have you ever
heard a girl go,
619
00:23:27,447 --> 00:23:28,913
"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes."
620
00:23:28,947 --> 00:23:31,013
‐Well...
‐Other than in a porno.
621
00:23:32,213 --> 00:23:33,780
‐I don't believe I have.
‐Me neithers.
622
00:23:33,813 --> 00:23:35,347
That's because
we don't say that.
623
00:23:35,380 --> 00:23:37,247
‐Well...
‐Not unless it's in a porno.
624
00:23:37,280 --> 00:23:38,413
WAYNE: Now my comment.
625
00:23:38,447 --> 00:23:40,380
You see, the way Dary did the
"yes, yes, yes, yes, yes's"
626
00:23:40,413 --> 00:23:42,813
is not the way they do
the "yes, yes, yes" in pornos.
627
00:23:42,847 --> 00:23:44,147
That's the way they do it.
628
00:23:44,180 --> 00:23:46,047
The girl gets all excited,
and she goes,
629
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:49,347
"Yes, yes, yes,
yes, yes, yes."
630
00:23:49,380 --> 00:23:51,213
Yes, but the way you're doing
the "yes, yes, yes, yes's"
631
00:23:51,247 --> 00:23:53,013
is not the way they do
the "yes, yes, yes, yes, yes."
632
00:23:53,047 --> 00:23:54,813
DARYL: It is the way
they do it.
633
00:23:54,847 --> 00:23:57,147
They go,
"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes."
634
00:23:57,180 --> 00:23:58,180
That's exactly
how they do it.
635
00:23:58,213 --> 00:23:59,447
WAYNE: No, they don't.
636
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:00,413
What they do is
they find a super‐high pitch
637
00:24:00,447 --> 00:24:01,913
for those first four yes's.
638
00:24:01,947 --> 00:24:02,780
And then
they come in all dramatic
639
00:24:02,813 --> 00:24:03,947
for that final "yes."
640
00:24:03,980 --> 00:24:05,447
So, it goes a little something
like, "Yes, yes, yes, yes."
641
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:06,480
And then they
get all dramatic
642
00:24:06,513 --> 00:24:07,547
for that final "yes."
643
00:24:07,580 --> 00:24:09,447
Say, "Yes! Oh."
644
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:10,880
I don't think that's
how they do it.
645
00:24:10,913 --> 00:24:12,047
I'd have to hears it again.
646
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:14,913
"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!"
647
00:24:14,947 --> 00:24:16,880
Yeah.
Yeah, porno girls do that.
648
00:24:16,913 --> 00:24:18,080
But only when
the porno guys
649
00:24:18,113 --> 00:24:20,313
aren't busy finding
some super‐low tone
650
00:24:20,347 --> 00:24:22,347
and repeating
over and over again,
651
00:24:22,380 --> 00:24:23,947
"Ah, fuck.
652
00:24:23,980 --> 00:24:25,780
"Ah, fuck."
653
00:24:25,813 --> 00:24:27,480
I takes a bit offense to that,
Miss Katy,
654
00:24:27,513 --> 00:24:29,180
as I have
a naturally low voice,
655
00:24:29,213 --> 00:24:31,347
and I do likes to say,
"Ah, fuck.
656
00:24:31,380 --> 00:24:32,780
"Ah, fuck."
657
00:24:32,813 --> 00:24:34,080
Exceptin' I don't
do it in pornos.
658
00:24:34,113 --> 00:24:35,413
Well, then you should
do voiceovers
659
00:24:35,447 --> 00:24:37,047
for English‐dubbed
foreign pornos, Dan,
660
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:40,247
because that was a text book
"ah, fuck, ah, fuck."
661
00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:41,380
Why thank you, Miss Katy.
662
00:24:41,413 --> 00:24:42,447
I've never had
any complaints from
663
00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:43,880
any of my sexual companions
664
00:24:43,913 --> 00:24:46,813
about my
"ah, fuck, ah, fuck."
665
00:24:48,213 --> 00:24:49,447
KATY: Let me hear yours, Dary.
666
00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:51,013
Well, I...
I'm confused still on the
667
00:24:51,047 --> 00:24:53,147
"yes, yes, yes, yes, yes's."
668
00:24:53,180 --> 00:24:55,913
So, Wayne,
it's like, uh,
669
00:24:55,947 --> 00:24:58,447
"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes"?
670
00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:00,447
See, it's not as if it's a
fuckin' question, Dary, is it?
671
00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:02,080
You're saying it
like it's a question.
672
00:25:02,113 --> 00:25:06,447
So, it's like,
"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes."
673
00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:07,980
You're gettin closer, Dary,
but what you want to do
674
00:25:08,013 --> 00:25:09,080
is put a little pepper
on the end of it.
675
00:25:09,113 --> 00:25:10,413
You just want to put a little
pepper on the end of it.
676
00:25:10,447 --> 00:25:12,013
Like, "Yes!"
677
00:25:13,247 --> 00:25:14,547
"Yes!"
678
00:25:14,580 --> 00:25:15,880
"Ah, fuck."
679
00:25:15,913 --> 00:25:17,447
‐It's like, "Yes, yes, yes..."
‐"Ah, fuck."
680
00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:19,280
‐"...yes, yes, yes!"
‐"Ah, fuck."
681
00:25:19,313 --> 00:25:21,813
Like, "Yes, yes, yes,
yes, yes!"
682
00:25:21,847 --> 00:25:22,913
"Yes!"
683
00:25:22,947 --> 00:25:24,180
Just having a fight
with my hat.
684
00:25:24,213 --> 00:25:25,913
‐(ALL MOANING)
‐"Oh, my God."
685
00:25:25,947 --> 00:25:27,880
(GRUNTING)
686
00:25:27,913 --> 00:25:29,213
(MOANING)
687
00:25:29,247 --> 00:25:31,213
"Oh, my God!"
688
00:25:31,247 --> 00:25:32,447
"Feels really good."
689
00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:35,313
"Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God."
690
00:25:35,347 --> 00:25:38,880
(ALL MOANING)
691
00:25:38,913 --> 00:25:40,313
"Oh, my God!
692
00:25:40,347 --> 00:25:42,080
"Oh, my God!
693
00:25:42,113 --> 00:25:43,813
"Oh, my God!"
694
00:25:45,347 --> 00:25:46,980
Three praccys a week, buddy?
695
00:25:47,013 --> 00:25:49,313
Three praccys a week in
Senior‐A whale shit, buddy.
696
00:25:49,347 --> 00:25:51,980
Half these guys wheel their
fuckin' bags into the rink.
697
00:25:52,620 --> 00:25:54,787
The day I fuckin' wheel
my bag into the rink
698
00:25:54,820 --> 00:25:56,820
is the day I stop
playing hockey.
699
00:25:56,854 --> 00:25:58,054
A‐fuckin'‐men, buddy.
700
00:25:58,087 --> 00:25:59,554
Why do we even praccy, buddy?
701
00:25:59,587 --> 00:26:01,054
Should be rippin' sandos.
702
00:26:01,087 --> 00:26:02,787
See me toss the sauce
in the skates
703
00:26:02,820 --> 00:26:04,820
‐all night long, buddy?
‐Just tossin' rocket sauce
704
00:26:04,854 --> 00:26:06,420
straight into the blades,
boys.
705
00:26:06,454 --> 00:26:09,154
I don't even know what
a tape‐to‐taper is anymore.
706
00:26:09,187 --> 00:26:11,020
Not sure what a tape‐to‐taper
is anymore, buddy.
707
00:26:11,054 --> 00:26:13,554
‐Fuck tape‐to‐tapers, buddy.
‐Fuck tapers.
708
00:26:13,587 --> 00:26:14,787
I fired
a point‐blank clap bomb
709
00:26:14,820 --> 00:26:16,487
directly into
Barts's chest tonight.
710
00:26:16,520 --> 00:26:18,487
Fired a point‐blank point bomb
straight in Yorkie's junk.
711
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:21,387
I snowed our plug tendy
no less than nine times.
712
00:26:21,420 --> 00:26:23,720
I snow‐showered our plug tendy
and that was his own "D," man.
713
00:26:23,754 --> 00:26:24,920
(BOTH LAUGHING)
714
00:26:24,954 --> 00:26:27,054
Praccy's not badski
when you're donkin'.
715
00:26:27,087 --> 00:26:28,687
I could donk all day, boys.
716
00:26:29,954 --> 00:26:31,620
(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)51718
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