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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,603 --> 00:00:04,768 You're leaving early? 2 00:00:04,770 --> 00:00:06,437 I gotta finish stringing up my lights. 3 00:00:06,439 --> 00:00:08,839 This'll be my biggest Christmas display yet. 4 00:00:08,841 --> 00:00:10,107 It'll make Rockefeller Center 5 00:00:10,109 --> 00:00:11,976 look like a stack of used diapers. 6 00:00:11,978 --> 00:00:13,644 God bless us, every one. 7 00:00:13,646 --> 00:00:15,563 Wait, I thought you said the electricity bills 8 00:00:15,564 --> 00:00:17,181 - killed you last year. - They did, 9 00:00:17,249 --> 00:00:18,582 but I figured out a work-around, 10 00:00:18,584 --> 00:00:20,150 so it won't cost me anything. 11 00:00:20,152 --> 00:00:22,286 - What's that you're wrapping? - It's a gift for Lacey. 12 00:00:22,288 --> 00:00:26,056 We decided to do a co-quasi semi-business partner 13 00:00:26,058 --> 00:00:26,991 Christmas present swap. 14 00:00:26,993 --> 00:00:29,159 Just a small thing. It's nothing special. 15 00:00:29,161 --> 00:00:30,895 Well, I'm sure she'll like it. 16 00:00:30,897 --> 00:00:32,257 As long as it's something personal. 17 00:00:32,281 --> 00:00:33,899 - Personal? - Yeah. 18 00:00:33,900 --> 00:00:36,000 Something meaningful and unique to her, 19 00:00:36,002 --> 00:00:37,668 and not just a piece of jewelry. 20 00:00:38,570 --> 00:00:40,851 - You got her jewelry. - It's not jewelry. 21 00:00:41,806 --> 00:00:43,474 Is a bracelet jewelry? 22 00:00:43,476 --> 00:00:47,344 ♪ You think there's not a lot goin' on ♪ 23 00:00:47,346 --> 00:00:50,781 ♪ Look closer, baby you're so wrong ♪ 24 00:00:51,475 --> 00:00:54,304 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 25 00:01:01,426 --> 00:01:02,326 How's it coming? 26 00:01:02,328 --> 00:01:05,529 Everything ready for the Christmas Eve party? 27 00:01:05,531 --> 00:01:07,865 - Not even close. - Good. 28 00:01:07,867 --> 00:01:10,034 Wait, not close is not good. 29 00:01:10,036 --> 00:01:12,303 Better shake a leg, woman, it's tomorrow night. 30 00:01:12,305 --> 00:01:15,205 - I might call the damn thing off. - Like hell! 31 00:01:15,207 --> 00:01:17,841 That's how I feel... like hell. 32 00:01:17,843 --> 00:01:20,210 My head is pounding, and I got chills. 33 00:01:20,212 --> 00:01:22,212 Well, have some tea, or rum, 34 00:01:22,214 --> 00:01:23,814 or suck an onion. 35 00:01:23,816 --> 00:01:26,116 I look forward to this party every year. 36 00:01:26,217 --> 00:01:28,719 That's because all you do is party. 37 00:01:28,721 --> 00:01:31,288 I do all the prep, all the running around, 38 00:01:31,290 --> 00:01:33,624 all the cooking, and all the cleanup. 39 00:01:33,626 --> 00:01:35,592 I'm too sick to do everything. 40 00:01:35,594 --> 00:01:38,862 If you don't do your share, there's no party this year. 41 00:01:40,099 --> 00:01:43,367 - Hey, Lacey, can I get a coffee? - Sure, just help yourself. 42 00:01:43,369 --> 00:01:45,269 I'm knitting a Christmas sweater for Brent, 43 00:01:45,271 --> 00:01:47,604 and I'm in a bit of a panic to get it done. 44 00:01:47,606 --> 00:01:49,807 It's December 23rd. Doesn't give you much time. 45 00:01:49,809 --> 00:01:52,142 Yeah, that's probably what the panic is about. 46 00:01:52,144 --> 00:01:54,611 I screwed up the moose pattern on the front 47 00:01:54,613 --> 00:01:55,412 and had to start over. 48 00:01:55,547 --> 00:01:57,614 Karen? 49 00:01:57,616 --> 00:01:58,215 Davis? 50 00:01:58,283 --> 00:02:00,918 Karen? Can you... me? 51 00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:01,752 Can I what you? 52 00:02:01,754 --> 00:02:03,788 I said I need to talk to you 53 00:02:03,789 --> 00:02:06,991 about what we're... Jeez, this static is terrible. 54 00:02:06,993 --> 00:02:09,460 Might be the batteries in your radio. 55 00:02:09,462 --> 00:02:12,563 Or first contact with an alien civilization. 56 00:02:12,565 --> 00:02:15,532 There are billions of galaxies in the universe, 57 00:02:15,534 --> 00:02:18,235 so it makes sense there'd be another civilization out there 58 00:02:18,237 --> 00:02:19,903 wanting to make contact. 59 00:02:23,308 --> 00:02:26,410 Or it could be something else. 60 00:02:27,145 --> 00:02:28,879 - Heya. - Nothing! 61 00:02:28,881 --> 00:02:31,915 Okay, then. Listen, I was just wondering... 62 00:02:31,917 --> 00:02:34,551 - Hey, what's with the moose? - Nothing! 63 00:02:34,553 --> 00:02:37,621 Just a moose. Regular old Christmas moose. 64 00:02:37,623 --> 00:02:39,390 Christmas moose? What's that? 65 00:02:39,524 --> 00:02:41,625 You never heard of the Christmas moose? 66 00:02:41,627 --> 00:02:44,194 It's a big thing back home. Big tradition. 67 00:02:44,362 --> 00:02:47,498 The Christmas moose holiday tradition is a thing... 68 00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:48,399 in the city. 69 00:02:48,401 --> 00:02:51,535 And you like this moose thing, personally? 70 00:02:51,537 --> 00:02:54,805 Big time. Love the Christmas moose. 71 00:02:55,975 --> 00:02:57,775 Hmm... 72 00:03:01,714 --> 00:03:04,415 Hey, Hank. You ever heard of a Christmas moose? 73 00:03:04,417 --> 00:03:06,817 No. Oh, unless you mean goose. 74 00:03:06,819 --> 00:03:07,751 Do you mean goose? 75 00:03:07,753 --> 00:03:09,453 You probably mean Christmas goose. 76 00:03:09,455 --> 00:03:11,889 Right, I keep forgetting not to ask you things. 77 00:03:12,792 --> 00:03:14,691 Oh, hey, Dad. We're closed. 78 00:03:14,693 --> 00:03:15,526 Tough turnips. 79 00:03:15,660 --> 00:03:17,694 Your mother gave me a list of crap I gotta get 80 00:03:17,696 --> 00:03:19,129 for our Christmas Eve party. 81 00:03:19,131 --> 00:03:21,031 I'm so sick and tired... 82 00:03:21,033 --> 00:03:22,866 - You're sick? - What? 83 00:03:22,868 --> 00:03:24,902 You shouldn't be running around if you're sick. 84 00:03:24,904 --> 00:03:26,470 Want me to give you a hand? 85 00:03:26,472 --> 00:03:29,273 Y-yeah... I'm sick as hell. 86 00:03:29,441 --> 00:03:32,176 Oh, god... got the shakes, and the sweats, 87 00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:34,144 and the... the bends, 88 00:03:34,146 --> 00:03:37,314 but I couldn't bear to see Emma doing all the work. 89 00:03:37,316 --> 00:03:39,249 Aw, you're a good guy, Oscar. 90 00:03:39,251 --> 00:03:42,419 Give me the list. You rest up. 91 00:03:43,088 --> 00:03:44,988 You ever heard of Christmas moose? 92 00:03:44,990 --> 00:03:47,825 Yeah. You ever heard of Easter, Jughead? 93 00:03:47,827 --> 00:03:50,861 It's moments like this that make the holidays special. 94 00:03:53,999 --> 00:03:56,166 That's good stuff, Hank. 95 00:03:56,168 --> 00:03:58,602 When you've got the wreath hung, 96 00:03:58,604 --> 00:04:00,170 I have a couple of other things... 97 00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:03,874 that need doing. 98 00:04:03,876 --> 00:04:06,610 - What's all the noise? - Oh, sorry, Emma. 99 00:04:06,612 --> 00:04:08,479 I don't know how to hammer quietly. 100 00:04:08,481 --> 00:04:10,948 Why are you hammering at all? 101 00:04:10,950 --> 00:04:12,616 Just hanging this wreath for Oscar. 102 00:04:12,618 --> 00:04:14,718 I'm helping him with the chores you gave him, 103 00:04:14,720 --> 00:04:17,821 - 'cause he's sick. - Oh, he is, is he? 104 00:04:17,823 --> 00:04:20,157 Now, hold on, before you get... 105 00:04:20,159 --> 00:04:23,961 - He caught it from me. - I'm sick too. 106 00:04:23,963 --> 00:04:25,329 If you're finished out here, 107 00:04:25,331 --> 00:04:27,598 come give me a hand with the dishes. 108 00:04:30,236 --> 00:04:33,303 Hey, Phil, you ever hear of a Christmas moose? 109 00:04:33,305 --> 00:04:35,372 Lacey says it was a tradition in her family. 110 00:04:35,374 --> 00:04:37,274 No, never heard of it, 111 00:04:37,276 --> 00:04:41,044 but every family has their own weird holiday traditions. 112 00:04:41,046 --> 00:04:43,147 In my family, we used to take stockings, 113 00:04:43,149 --> 00:04:46,917 like for feet, and hang them on the fireplace! 114 00:04:46,919 --> 00:04:50,187 - Hmm, that's not very... - Then we'd bring a tree... 115 00:04:50,189 --> 00:04:52,789 into the house! 116 00:04:52,791 --> 00:04:54,458 - Outrageous. - Isn't it? 117 00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:56,693 I miss those traditions. 118 00:04:56,695 --> 00:04:59,763 Wait, that's it! Lacey is away from her family, 119 00:04:59,765 --> 00:05:02,199 so she's missing all her old Christmas traditions, 120 00:05:02,201 --> 00:05:03,867 like her moose thing or whatever. 121 00:05:03,869 --> 00:05:04,568 I'm going to find out 122 00:05:04,769 --> 00:05:06,289 what other traditions she grew up with, 123 00:05:06,313 --> 00:05:08,572 so I can give her a Christmas like she remembers. 124 00:05:08,574 --> 00:05:11,074 That's a personal, unique gift, right? 125 00:05:11,076 --> 00:05:16,213 ...and then we'd make a drink out of raw eggs! 126 00:05:17,149 --> 00:05:18,048 Thanks, Phil. 127 00:05:18,050 --> 00:05:19,783 You've been inadvertently helpful. 128 00:05:27,258 --> 00:05:29,526 Bad news, Wanda. Your Christmas light display 129 00:05:29,528 --> 00:05:32,029 is causing interference with our radios. 130 00:05:32,031 --> 00:05:34,531 Good news, World War II is over, and we won. 131 00:05:34,666 --> 00:05:36,066 You can put your walkie-talkies away 132 00:05:36,068 --> 00:05:38,135 - and use your phones. - This is serious. 133 00:05:38,137 --> 00:05:39,369 We have a job to do, 134 00:05:39,371 --> 00:05:41,405 and you can't be interfering with our equipment. 135 00:05:41,573 --> 00:05:43,607 This is way too many lights anyway. 136 00:05:43,609 --> 00:05:45,976 The electric bill must be huge. 137 00:05:45,978 --> 00:05:48,378 It was, but I rigged up my own grid box 138 00:05:48,380 --> 00:05:50,231 that amplifies a direct current using 139 00:05:50,232 --> 00:05:52,082 semi-coil conductivity running parallel 140 00:05:52,084 --> 00:05:54,751 with an aggregated magnetization panel. 141 00:05:55,653 --> 00:05:59,256 So... there's no IQ test to be a cop? 142 00:05:59,258 --> 00:06:02,826 They just give a gun to anybody? Hmm. 143 00:06:07,233 --> 00:06:09,466 Well, there's the problem. 144 00:06:10,668 --> 00:06:13,403 - Hey! - Thanks for understanding. 145 00:06:13,705 --> 00:06:16,173 Are you kidding me?! 146 00:06:16,175 --> 00:06:19,142 Thanks a lot, Sergeant Scrooge and Officer Grinch! 147 00:06:19,144 --> 00:06:21,111 The cops hate Christmas! 148 00:06:21,113 --> 00:06:24,248 Pass it on, everybody, the cops hate Christmas! 149 00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:26,350 We don't hate Christmas. 150 00:06:26,352 --> 00:06:30,921 - We love Christmas! - Yeah! Probably more than you! 151 00:06:32,091 --> 00:06:34,224 Oh, you love Christmas, do ya? 152 00:06:34,226 --> 00:06:37,027 Well, we'll just see how much you love it. 153 00:06:37,029 --> 00:06:40,762 Mwa-ha-ha-ha! 154 00:06:45,939 --> 00:06:47,472 Hmm? Huh? 155 00:06:47,474 --> 00:06:49,941 13 rockets are too many. 156 00:06:49,943 --> 00:06:52,844 What? Hank, is that you? 157 00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:55,346 Oh. Hey... Hey, Emma. 158 00:06:55,348 --> 00:06:58,450 Yeah, you got caught up in the tail end of a dream there. 159 00:06:58,452 --> 00:07:01,453 A platypus was trying to sell me some rockets, 160 00:07:01,455 --> 00:07:03,755 but the floor of my castle was already melting. 161 00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:06,391 Listen, I have some last-minute things 162 00:07:06,393 --> 00:07:08,893 that you need to get done for our party tonight. 163 00:07:08,895 --> 00:07:11,563 Me? But it's Christmas Eve. 164 00:07:11,565 --> 00:07:13,531 Yeah. It's a Christmas Eve party. 165 00:07:13,533 --> 00:07:16,167 But I have a bunch of my own stuff to do. 166 00:07:16,169 --> 00:07:19,204 My lights aren't up, I still need a tree... 167 00:07:19,206 --> 00:07:22,073 Don't bother him, Emma. 168 00:07:22,075 --> 00:07:24,676 I'll do it. Just help me up. 169 00:07:24,844 --> 00:07:27,612 I-I fell down again from the dizziness. 170 00:07:27,614 --> 00:07:31,349 I can't lift you, Oscar, my spleen is swollen. 171 00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:34,385 Your spleen? Just push it back in. 172 00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:36,058 I'll be right over. 173 00:07:37,089 --> 00:07:41,359 - What the hell? - When did this happen? 174 00:07:41,361 --> 00:07:42,560 Early this morning! 175 00:07:42,562 --> 00:07:45,063 I know how much you guys love Christmas. 176 00:07:45,065 --> 00:07:46,865 More than anyone, probably! 177 00:07:46,867 --> 00:07:50,335 So I figured this would be a nice holiday surprise. 178 00:07:50,337 --> 00:07:53,605 - You can't do this. - That's what I thought, too, 179 00:07:53,607 --> 00:07:55,473 but it was actually super easy. 180 00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:57,509 A couple of cans of spray adhesive, 181 00:07:57,511 --> 00:07:58,877 a dozen boxes of tinsel... 182 00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:01,520 - How are we supposed to... - You're welcome! 183 00:08:01,555 --> 00:08:05,517 Merry Christmas, Christmas lovers! 184 00:08:05,584 --> 00:08:08,052 How do we...? 185 00:08:09,955 --> 00:08:11,289 How's Brent's sweater coming? 186 00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:12,957 I'm in the home stretch now. 187 00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:14,559 It's really starting to take shape. 188 00:08:14,561 --> 00:08:16,861 And you're sure you got all his measurements right? 189 00:08:16,863 --> 00:08:17,662 Measurements? 190 00:08:17,796 --> 00:08:20,365 I never even thought about measurements. 191 00:08:20,367 --> 00:08:22,800 I was just going from the standard pattern. 192 00:08:22,802 --> 00:08:25,737 Brent's body isn't what you'd call "standard." 193 00:08:25,849 --> 00:08:28,850 Oh, no. How am I gonna get his measurements 194 00:08:28,852 --> 00:08:30,585 without tipping what I'm doing? 195 00:08:30,587 --> 00:08:33,421 - Merry Christmas Eve morning. - Hi! Yeah. 196 00:08:33,423 --> 00:08:36,691 - I was just, um... waffles? - Cool. Um, so, listen, 197 00:08:36,693 --> 00:08:38,826 I was just thinking, for no reason, 198 00:08:38,828 --> 00:08:41,095 about what other holiday traditions 199 00:08:41,097 --> 00:08:43,698 your family maybe had. Just a casual thought, 200 00:08:43,700 --> 00:08:46,100 sparked for no reason by what you said yesterday. 201 00:08:46,102 --> 00:08:48,603 Oh, and what did I say yesterday? 202 00:08:48,605 --> 00:08:51,005 - About the Christmas moose. - Oh! 203 00:08:51,007 --> 00:08:52,640 Yes. The moose. 204 00:08:52,708 --> 00:08:54,642 The Christmas moose tradition. 205 00:08:54,644 --> 00:08:57,913 It was a big thing, uh... in the city. 206 00:08:57,946 --> 00:09:00,682 We'd see who could lure the biggest moose, um, 207 00:09:00,684 --> 00:09:02,383 into the downtown core, 208 00:09:02,385 --> 00:09:06,120 and the largest would be crowned Christmas Moose. 209 00:09:06,122 --> 00:09:06,888 Wow, that... 210 00:09:07,056 --> 00:09:08,990 A lot could go sideways in that scenario. 211 00:09:08,992 --> 00:09:11,959 One year, we had a moose whose antlers were wider 212 00:09:11,961 --> 00:09:15,463 than you could probably stretch your arms out. 213 00:09:15,465 --> 00:09:17,198 Stretch your arms out. 214 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,333 Yeah. Way bigger than that. 215 00:09:19,335 --> 00:09:22,470 Well, no human could reach across a whole moose. 216 00:09:22,472 --> 00:09:25,073 - How high can you reach? - Maybe half a moose. 217 00:09:25,075 --> 00:09:26,808 No, no, this has to do with the ceremonial... 218 00:09:26,810 --> 00:09:29,544 you know, the changing of the lightbulbs? 219 00:09:29,546 --> 00:09:32,680 From white bulbs to red. Christmas red. 220 00:09:32,682 --> 00:09:34,348 Someone would reach up and... 221 00:09:34,350 --> 00:09:38,720 - How high can you reach? - Red lights, eh? 222 00:09:38,722 --> 00:09:42,690 Okay, the wine is mulled, the potatoes are peeled, 223 00:09:42,692 --> 00:09:45,159 the stuffing is prepped. Anything else? 224 00:09:45,161 --> 00:09:48,062 Well, if the stuffing's prepped, 225 00:09:48,064 --> 00:09:50,465 - you should probably... - Really? 226 00:09:50,467 --> 00:09:52,333 You want me to stuff the turkey, too? 227 00:09:52,335 --> 00:09:55,103 What. You don't expect us to handle raw poultry 228 00:09:55,105 --> 00:09:56,437 when we're already swarming 229 00:09:56,439 --> 00:09:59,674 with God knows what kind of bacterial mega-virus. 230 00:09:59,676 --> 00:10:01,709 Our immune systems are teetering 231 00:10:01,711 --> 00:10:05,379 on the brink of a total E. coli vortex. 232 00:10:05,381 --> 00:10:08,416 Oh no! I heard about that on the Weather Channel. 233 00:10:08,418 --> 00:10:12,453 Uh, I-I guess my Christmas can wait. 234 00:10:14,945 --> 00:10:17,525 Maybe have to wait until next Christmas. 235 00:10:19,796 --> 00:10:21,863 It's hard to get respect as a cop 236 00:10:21,865 --> 00:10:23,898 when your car looks like a... 237 00:10:23,900 --> 00:10:27,401 - I'm gonna say flapper dress. - I was gonna say disco wig. 238 00:10:27,403 --> 00:10:30,238 Ooh, Donna Summer. Hubba hubba. 239 00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:31,520 Maybe we should get a hair dryer, 240 00:10:31,544 --> 00:10:33,474 melt the glue and blow off the tinsel. 241 00:10:33,476 --> 00:10:36,544 Or we could take this baby out on the highway, 242 00:10:36,546 --> 00:10:40,148 and let nature do the blowing. Hit the siren, rookie. 243 00:10:46,156 --> 00:10:50,391 - I think the siren's frozen. - That's a Christmas song. 244 00:10:50,393 --> 00:10:53,060 It won't stop. How did this happen? 245 00:10:55,031 --> 00:10:58,444 - Wanda happened. - She's everywhere! 246 00:10:58,479 --> 00:10:59,674 She's like an elf on the shelf, 247 00:10:59,698 --> 00:11:02,904 only on the sidewalk, and smaller. 248 00:11:02,906 --> 00:11:05,273 I see you discovered my gift. 249 00:11:05,275 --> 00:11:08,042 - How do you shut it off? - I can't hear you! 250 00:11:08,044 --> 00:11:10,578 I can only assume you're thanking me. 251 00:11:10,580 --> 00:11:15,516 You're welcome, and Joyeux Noel, Christmas lovers! 252 00:11:15,518 --> 00:11:18,653 Boy, those two sure love Christmas, huh? 253 00:11:21,491 --> 00:11:22,890 Why the puzzled look? 254 00:11:22,892 --> 00:11:25,393 Huh? Oh, I'm just reviewing a list I made 255 00:11:25,395 --> 00:11:26,761 for Lacey's Christmas gift. 256 00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:30,631 Uh, not sure where you're going with this. 257 00:11:30,633 --> 00:11:33,534 Lacey grew up with some weird Christmas traditions. 258 00:11:33,536 --> 00:11:36,304 We had some doozies in our family, too. 259 00:11:36,306 --> 00:11:40,107 When I was a kid, we used to put food out for Santa. 260 00:11:40,109 --> 00:11:43,411 Now, Santa was a magical northern wizard who... 261 00:11:43,413 --> 00:11:45,546 I know who Santa is! What do you people... 262 00:11:45,548 --> 00:11:48,182 This is just a partial list. 263 00:11:48,184 --> 00:11:51,519 I need more info, but how do I talk to Lacey 264 00:11:51,521 --> 00:11:54,422 about her traditions without her getting suspicious? 265 00:11:55,491 --> 00:11:57,658 Brent... I just realized 266 00:11:57,660 --> 00:11:59,627 there were some other Christmas traditions 267 00:11:59,629 --> 00:12:01,529 I forgot to tell you about. 268 00:12:01,531 --> 00:12:02,964 Oh, that worked out really... 269 00:12:02,966 --> 00:12:04,465 Do you know about the chimney 270 00:12:04,467 --> 00:12:07,201 - and the reindeer? - Thank you, Fitzy. 271 00:12:07,203 --> 00:12:10,504 - You were saying? - I forgot to mention the moose call. 272 00:12:10,506 --> 00:12:12,573 - A moose calls you? - No. 273 00:12:12,575 --> 00:12:15,343 When we tried to lure the moose into the city, 274 00:12:15,345 --> 00:12:16,677 we'd use a moose call. 275 00:12:16,679 --> 00:12:18,479 That makes sense, right? 276 00:12:18,481 --> 00:12:21,415 Not "sense," necessarily, but if you... 277 00:12:23,987 --> 00:12:24,619 Jeez! 278 00:12:24,621 --> 00:12:27,588 - Why don't you try? - O-Okay. 279 00:12:27,590 --> 00:12:29,023 Barroo... 280 00:12:29,925 --> 00:12:32,193 You need to tighten your throat more. 281 00:12:32,195 --> 00:12:33,761 Wow, you have a big neck. 282 00:12:33,763 --> 00:12:36,097 That's about three hand lengths? 283 00:12:36,099 --> 00:12:37,431 Barroo... 284 00:12:37,433 --> 00:12:39,133 Whoa, whoa! What are you...? 285 00:12:39,135 --> 00:12:41,103 I was just thinking that you're about 286 00:12:41,104 --> 00:12:43,604 the same size around as, uh... 287 00:12:43,606 --> 00:12:46,474 the watermelon... we decorate. 288 00:12:46,476 --> 00:12:49,243 We wrap it in lights and put stickers on it, 289 00:12:49,245 --> 00:12:52,280 - and, uh, glitter? - "Glitter melon." 290 00:12:52,282 --> 00:12:53,814 - What? - I was just saying, 291 00:12:53,916 --> 00:12:56,417 I'm, uh, I'm gonna go close up early. 292 00:12:56,419 --> 00:12:57,485 I have to get ready 293 00:12:57,487 --> 00:12:58,986 for Mom and Dad's Christmas Eve party, 294 00:12:58,988 --> 00:13:00,855 and I have a lot to do before then. 295 00:13:00,857 --> 00:13:03,624 - Yes. - I also have a lot... 296 00:13:03,626 --> 00:13:08,029 of cafe-related things to do as well, mm-hmm. 297 00:13:08,697 --> 00:13:11,565 Maybe we can call a truce. 298 00:13:11,567 --> 00:13:13,768 We have no leverage to negotiate. 299 00:13:13,770 --> 00:13:17,405 - What does Wanda want? - All she wants 300 00:13:17,407 --> 00:13:19,807 is to turn on her light display without going broke. 301 00:13:19,809 --> 00:13:22,643 We just give back her power-saving gizmo. 302 00:13:22,645 --> 00:13:24,178 Then she'll leave us alone. 303 00:13:24,180 --> 00:13:26,681 Because she'll have her lights back on. 304 00:13:26,683 --> 00:13:28,883 Wanda, we brought back your... 305 00:13:28,885 --> 00:13:30,084 What the hell? 306 00:13:31,554 --> 00:13:34,088 Her lights are already back on. 307 00:13:34,090 --> 00:13:37,468 - Now what? - Now we're Scrooged. 308 00:13:41,221 --> 00:13:43,188 She turned her lights back on. 309 00:13:43,190 --> 00:13:45,924 Do you know what this means? 310 00:13:45,926 --> 00:13:48,260 Yes, but... I want you to say it. 311 00:13:48,262 --> 00:13:51,029 We've lost our leverage with Wanda. 312 00:13:51,031 --> 00:13:53,398 Right. Wait, why is that power cord 313 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:55,534 running away from her house? 314 00:14:01,274 --> 00:14:03,074 You mess with our walkie talkies, 315 00:14:03,076 --> 00:14:05,110 you festively sabotage our car, 316 00:14:05,112 --> 00:14:07,679 and now you steal power from the town! 317 00:14:07,681 --> 00:14:09,347 I got desperate, okay? 318 00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:12,184 I mean, what's Christmas without twinkly lights? 319 00:14:12,186 --> 00:14:15,153 I'm sorry about the tinsel, and the caroling siren, 320 00:14:15,155 --> 00:14:16,488 and the nog bombs. 321 00:14:16,490 --> 00:14:19,024 - I just wanted... - Wait, nog bombs? 322 00:14:19,026 --> 00:14:20,091 They didn't go off? 323 00:14:22,021 --> 00:14:23,895 Huh, my watch must be fast. 324 00:14:23,897 --> 00:14:25,831 Congratulations, Wanda. 325 00:14:25,833 --> 00:14:30,202 You're getting yourself a big fat Christmas ticket. 326 00:14:30,204 --> 00:14:33,673 Well, nice work, Sergeant Krampus and Officer... 327 00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:37,008 Old Man Potter from "It's a Wonderful Life"... 328 00:14:37,010 --> 00:14:38,310 if he was a cop! 329 00:14:38,312 --> 00:14:41,713 I'm taking all my lights down! You happy now? 330 00:14:53,093 --> 00:14:55,257 What are you grinning at? 331 00:14:56,195 --> 00:14:58,263 Everything's almost ready, 332 00:14:58,265 --> 00:15:00,098 but I feel like I'm forgetting something. 333 00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:03,969 Just come and have a rum and eggnog, huh? 334 00:15:03,971 --> 00:15:05,871 We'll sit by the tree, and... 335 00:15:05,873 --> 00:15:09,174 Holy Hanukkah! We don't have a tree! 336 00:15:09,176 --> 00:15:13,411 So long, Nick. Maybe next year. 337 00:15:14,881 --> 00:15:17,849 Leaky Santa? I got a patch kit in the glove box. 338 00:15:17,851 --> 00:15:19,017 He's not leaking. 339 00:15:19,019 --> 00:15:21,620 He's been decommissioned by fascists. 340 00:15:21,622 --> 00:15:24,289 - Now Christmas sucks. - Christmas doesn't suck. 341 00:15:24,291 --> 00:15:26,958 Sure, it can be tough sometimes. 342 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,226 Take Oscar and Emma. 343 00:15:28,228 --> 00:15:30,428 I had to do all their prep work for their party, 344 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,030 and they're too sick to do it. 345 00:15:32,032 --> 00:15:34,466 Anyway, I better get going. I barely have time 346 00:15:34,468 --> 00:15:36,301 to get my own tree and decorations up. 347 00:15:37,738 --> 00:15:39,304 Hank talkin'. 348 00:15:39,306 --> 00:15:42,374 Hank, is that you? I'm so weak. 349 00:15:42,376 --> 00:15:45,043 - Oscar? What's wrong? - It's Emma. 350 00:15:46,079 --> 00:15:49,881 In her fevered state, she forgot to get a tree. 351 00:15:49,883 --> 00:15:52,317 - Sure, blame me. - What? 352 00:15:52,319 --> 00:15:56,855 I said, I blame me, and my fever. 353 00:15:57,924 --> 00:16:01,793 So I guess we'll just do without one this year. 354 00:16:01,795 --> 00:16:03,912 Wait! I happen to have a tree 355 00:16:03,913 --> 00:16:06,898 with me right now. I'll be right over. 356 00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:10,268 You're giving them your tree? What about your Christmas? 357 00:16:10,270 --> 00:16:13,371 Ah, the holidays are more than trees and lights. 358 00:16:13,373 --> 00:16:15,373 They're about helping people. 359 00:16:15,375 --> 00:16:18,209 You're a better person than I am. If that was me, 360 00:16:18,211 --> 00:16:19,491 I'd tell 'em to cram a candy cane 361 00:16:19,515 --> 00:16:22,080 - and kiss my chocolate orange. - That's the spirit. 362 00:16:22,082 --> 00:16:24,342 Merry Christmas, Wanda. 363 00:16:25,184 --> 00:16:28,954 What a sap. A sweet, stupid sap. 364 00:16:31,124 --> 00:16:34,259 Well, I appreciate being invited over for a drink 365 00:16:34,261 --> 00:16:35,727 before your parents' party, 366 00:16:35,729 --> 00:16:38,163 but why do I have to keep my eyes closed? 367 00:16:38,165 --> 00:16:42,000 You'll see. Just come in a little further... 368 00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:43,802 and open! 369 00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:50,375 Sorry, I can't do a proper moose call, 370 00:16:50,377 --> 00:16:52,110 so I had to improvise. 371 00:16:52,112 --> 00:16:55,714 - Wh-what is all of this? - This is your present! 372 00:16:55,716 --> 00:16:58,016 I tricked you into answering questions 373 00:16:58,018 --> 00:16:59,384 about your holiday traditions, 374 00:16:59,386 --> 00:17:00,919 and then cleverly wove them 375 00:17:00,921 --> 00:17:03,221 into this personalized gift, 376 00:17:03,223 --> 00:17:04,556 and also the Christmas watermelon. 377 00:17:04,558 --> 00:17:06,558 Won didn't have any melons, 378 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:08,159 so I spray-painted a pumpkin. 379 00:17:08,161 --> 00:17:10,428 - I see. Um... - But the hat rack lamp 380 00:17:10,430 --> 00:17:12,497 is authentic antlers and bones. 381 00:17:12,499 --> 00:17:15,133 Gus hit a moose on the highway last night. 382 00:17:15,135 --> 00:17:17,035 It's a Christmas miracle! 383 00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:21,406 - What's so funny? - First of all, 384 00:17:21,408 --> 00:17:24,943 I cunningly made up these traditions to measure you 385 00:17:24,945 --> 00:17:27,545 so I could make you this gift. 386 00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:30,815 The only Christmas moose is the one on this sweater, 387 00:17:30,817 --> 00:17:33,018 which I knitted for ya, all by myself. 388 00:17:33,020 --> 00:17:35,286 Wait a minute, you lied to me, 389 00:17:35,288 --> 00:17:37,155 while I was just fibbing to you? 390 00:17:37,157 --> 00:17:38,590 Oh, shut up and try it on. 391 00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:40,992 Oh... 392 00:17:40,994 --> 00:17:42,894 Are you sure you measured me, 393 00:17:42,896 --> 00:17:45,263 and not someone else? Like, from a circus? 394 00:17:45,265 --> 00:17:47,532 All right, it needs a few adjustments, 395 00:17:47,534 --> 00:17:49,501 and the moose kinda got away from me. 396 00:17:49,503 --> 00:17:51,102 It sort of looks like a moose. 397 00:17:51,104 --> 00:17:52,671 Moose-slash-Satan. 398 00:17:52,673 --> 00:17:54,539 It-it's probably just the red lights. 399 00:17:54,541 --> 00:17:55,840 Yeah, well, the red lights 400 00:17:55,842 --> 00:17:58,810 aren't doing your lamp rack any favours either. 401 00:17:58,812 --> 00:18:00,011 You're right. 402 00:18:00,013 --> 00:18:02,547 Ah, I'm sorry. I just really wanted 403 00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:04,683 to give you something personal this year. 404 00:18:04,685 --> 00:18:08,319 Aw... I wanted to do that for you, too. 405 00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:10,588 Well, look, we both tried, 406 00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:12,457 and we both fell a bit short, 407 00:18:12,459 --> 00:18:15,393 - so we're good, right? - Agreed. 408 00:18:15,395 --> 00:18:16,227 Now, how about a drink? 409 00:18:16,229 --> 00:18:18,797 I made a batch of pumpkin-spiced rum. 410 00:18:18,799 --> 00:18:20,165 Oh, yeah, well, 411 00:18:20,167 --> 00:18:22,205 you know, I think I'm just gonna have wine. 412 00:18:23,703 --> 00:18:25,937 Wanda? What are you doing at my place? 413 00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:27,939 I came over here to do this. 414 00:18:27,941 --> 00:18:28,907 Brace yourself. 415 00:18:30,010 --> 00:18:30,842 Ugh. 416 00:18:31,010 --> 00:18:33,411 This car's gonna smell like rotten nog forever. 417 00:18:33,413 --> 00:18:35,980 Not on my watch. Behold... 418 00:18:35,982 --> 00:18:38,183 the festive freshener. 419 00:18:38,185 --> 00:18:42,287 - Merry Christmas, partner. - Merry Christmas. 420 00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:44,689 Wow, that's really getting bright. 421 00:18:44,691 --> 00:18:47,459 No, that's coming from outside. 422 00:18:47,461 --> 00:18:50,428 Oh, no. Probably aliens. 423 00:18:52,799 --> 00:18:54,966 Whoa! You did this? 424 00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:56,601 - For me? - Remember how I told you 425 00:18:56,603 --> 00:18:58,937 you're a better person than I am? 426 00:18:58,939 --> 00:19:01,406 Guess you're not. Suck it, Yarbo! 427 00:19:02,609 --> 00:19:05,110 - And Merry Christmas. - This is amazing! 428 00:19:05,112 --> 00:19:07,645 Surfing Santa, and a Christmas flamingo, 429 00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:10,048 and a disco ball, and... 430 00:19:10,050 --> 00:19:12,584 - Uh, I'm not sure what that is. - It's a tangle. 431 00:19:12,586 --> 00:19:14,853 I didn't have a lot of time. 432 00:19:14,855 --> 00:19:17,122 Nice lights, Hank. I bet they're enjoying this 433 00:19:17,124 --> 00:19:19,023 on the International Space Station. 434 00:19:19,025 --> 00:19:21,793 Oh, it's so pretty. What's that bundle of lights? 435 00:19:21,795 --> 00:19:24,629 - It's a Christmas tumbleweed, okay? - A what? 436 00:19:24,631 --> 00:19:26,598 You've never heard of the Christmas tumbleweed? 437 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,032 It's a country thing. 438 00:19:29,938 --> 00:19:32,137 Cheese it! The cops. You never saw me. 439 00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:37,008 - Feliz Navidad, Dad. - Fleece yourself, jackass! 440 00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:38,409 Where the hell are you? 441 00:19:38,411 --> 00:19:39,611 And where's everyone else? 442 00:19:39,613 --> 00:19:41,780 - The party's ready to go. - It is? 443 00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:43,882 Hank told Wanda you guys were sick, 444 00:19:43,884 --> 00:19:46,618 so Wanda arranged to have the party at Hank's place. 445 00:19:46,620 --> 00:19:48,620 But we have everything ready here! 446 00:19:48,622 --> 00:19:50,622 This is the best party of the year. 447 00:19:50,624 --> 00:19:52,457 Oh, thanks a lot, Hank! 448 00:19:52,459 --> 00:19:54,726 - You're welcome. - Rest up and get well soon. 449 00:19:54,728 --> 00:19:56,168 But we... 450 00:19:56,192 --> 00:19:58,396 Warms your heart, doesn't it? 451 00:20:07,775 --> 00:20:09,943 Merry Christmas! 452 00:20:09,945 --> 00:20:12,913 Turns out we're feeling better. 453 00:20:12,915 --> 00:20:15,248 Must've been one of those 12-hour bugs. 454 00:20:15,250 --> 00:20:17,183 Anyway, we brought some food. 455 00:20:17,185 --> 00:20:20,120 Oh, that's great. You can set it up in the kitchen. 456 00:20:20,122 --> 00:20:21,254 We have to set it up? 457 00:20:21,256 --> 00:20:23,456 You said you were feeling better, right? 458 00:20:24,525 --> 00:20:26,393 - Uh, what's this? - I feel bad 459 00:20:26,527 --> 00:20:28,428 for the nightmare moose rack gift, 460 00:20:28,430 --> 00:20:29,829 so I figured I'd give you the present 461 00:20:29,831 --> 00:20:32,499 I originally planned on giving you. 462 00:20:35,537 --> 00:20:37,437 You're angry. I get it. 463 00:20:37,605 --> 00:20:39,706 Jewelry is such an impersonal gift. 464 00:20:39,708 --> 00:20:42,309 I love it! Aw, you big dumb jerk. 465 00:20:42,311 --> 00:20:45,312 You're welcome, and I'm sorry? What's happening? 466 00:20:45,314 --> 00:20:48,582 Okay, when we both exchanged crappy gifts, 467 00:20:48,584 --> 00:20:49,316 we were even. 468 00:20:49,450 --> 00:20:51,718 Then you go and give me something great? 469 00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:55,121 Thanks a lot, Brent. Merry stinkin' Christmas. 470 00:20:56,390 --> 00:20:58,142 I don't know why you just didn't 471 00:20:58,143 --> 00:20:59,894 give her the bracelet in the first place. 472 00:20:59,895 --> 00:21:01,962 Why don't you stop talking until the New Year? 473 00:21:06,140 --> 00:21:07,841 ♪ I don't know ♪ 474 00:21:07,843 --> 00:21:09,376 ♪ The same things you don't know ♪ 475 00:21:13,015 --> 00:21:15,482 ♪ I don't know ♪ 476 00:21:15,484 --> 00:21:18,385 ♪ I just... don't know ♪ 477 00:21:20,855 --> 00:21:22,956 ♪ Ooh... ♪ 478 00:21:22,958 --> 00:21:26,626 - ♪ Have a holiday moose ♪ - ♪ Fa-la-la-la... ♪ 479 00:21:26,628 --> 00:21:30,281 - ♪ Some glitter pumpkin juice ♪ - ♪ Fa-la-la-la... ♪ 480 00:21:30,282 --> 00:21:35,035 - ♪ We love all of youse ♪ - ♪ This I know ♪ 481 00:21:35,736 --> 00:21:38,736 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 36394