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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:27,800 --> 00:00:29,300 [LAUGHING] 2 00:00:29,300 --> 00:00:37,530 * 3 00:00:37,533 --> 00:00:38,703 [ APPLAUSE ] 4 00:00:38,700 --> 00:00:40,970 * 5 00:00:40,967 --> 00:00:43,167 >> HOW IS ANYONE ALIEVE IN 6 00:00:43,167 --> 00:00:44,297 AFRICA? 7 00:00:44,300 --> 00:00:44,670 [LAUGHING] 8 00:00:44,667 --> 00:00:47,467 >> WELCOME TO TOSH.O, OHIO 9 00:00:47,467 --> 00:00:47,767 STATE. 10 00:00:47,767 --> 00:00:49,697 YOU WANTED THE BEST YOU GOT THE 11 00:00:49,700 --> 00:00:50,030 VEST. 12 00:00:50,033 --> 00:00:50,403 [LAUGHING] 13 00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:52,400 >> WHICH ONE OF BOYS WOULD LIKE 14 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:54,000 TO DOT MY i. 15 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:56,570 TONIGHT THE SHROOM GUY GETS A 16 00:00:56,567 --> 00:00:57,327 WEB INTERVENTION. 17 00:00:57,333 --> 00:00:59,533 WE LEARN TO PAY IT BACKWARDS AND 18 00:00:59,533 --> 00:01:02,273 I GIVE YOU A RARE LOOK INTO MY 19 00:01:02,267 --> 00:01:03,827 GEM FILE. 20 00:01:03,833 --> 00:01:08,903 SOME HOW ANIMALS KNOW NOT TO 21 00:01:08,900 --> 00:01:10,930 RESPECTIVELY RESPECT CYCLIST. 22 00:01:10,933 --> 00:01:14,403 THE ONE TIME THERE ISN'T A DEER 23 00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:16,430 CROSSING SIGN 24 00:01:16,433 --> 00:01:19,803 * 25 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:21,470 [LAUGHING] 26 00:01:21,467 --> 00:01:23,067 >> THAT WAS THREE OF OUR WRITERS 27 00:01:23,067 --> 00:01:25,297 KIND OF SINGING THE SONG. 28 00:01:25,300 --> 00:01:28,200 SO WE DON'T GET SUED. 29 00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:33,900 AHHH, THE CYCLE OF LIFE. 30 00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:35,430 ALRIGHT DEPENDS ON THE SPOT THAT 31 00:01:35,433 --> 00:01:37,073 LOOKS LIKE GOOD GOAL LINE 32 00:01:37,067 --> 00:01:37,427 DEFENSE. 33 00:01:37,433 --> 00:01:40,073 THIS WOULDN'T HAPPEN IF WE WOULD 34 00:01:40,067 --> 00:01:42,297 DESTROY MORE OF THEIR NATURAL 35 00:01:42,300 --> 00:01:42,730 HABITAT. 36 00:01:42,733 --> 00:01:46,073 THIS NEXT GENIUS IS ONE HERS 37 00:01:46,067 --> 00:01:47,927 INSPIRATION. 38 00:01:47,933 --> 00:01:50,273 110% PRAEUGS. 39 00:01:50,267 --> 00:01:54,627 THAT'S 111%. 40 00:01:54,633 --> 00:01:56,603 >> I DON'T UNDERSTAND A LICK OF 41 00:01:56,600 --> 00:01:57,070 GERMAN. 42 00:01:57,067 --> 00:01:58,897 CAN WE SPEED THIS PRESS 43 00:01:58,900 --> 00:01:59,630 CONFERENCE UP. 44 00:01:59,633 --> 00:02:01,473 IT'S STARTING TO GET WARM IN 45 00:02:01,467 --> 00:02:01,897 HERE. 46 00:02:01,900 --> 00:02:03,570 THEY REALLY MUST BE GRILLING 47 00:02:03,567 --> 00:02:03,867 HIM. 48 00:02:03,867 --> 00:02:04,297 [LAUGHING] 49 00:02:04,300 --> 00:02:08,830 >> DRI-FIT COULD REVOLUTIONIZE 50 00:02:08,833 --> 00:02:11,073 THAT MISSION RABBLE COUNTRY. 51 00:02:11,067 --> 00:02:13,127 ARE THEY HOLDING THIS PRESS 52 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,333 CONFERENCE ON THE SUN? 53 00:02:15,333 --> 00:02:17,173 HE'S FOREIGN YOU KNOW HE STINKS 54 00:02:17,167 --> 00:02:19,467 TOO. I HAVE A FEELING THIS NEXT 55 00:02:19,467 --> 00:02:23,467 STUNT WILL TOTALLY BE WORTH IT. 56 00:02:24,967 --> 00:02:28,227 >> NOW THAT IS A TWISTED ANKLE. 57 00:02:28,233 --> 00:02:28,933 [BEEP] 58 00:02:28,933 --> 00:02:34,403 >> YA, YOUR FOOT SON BACKWARDS. 59 00:02:34,400 --> 00:02:36,870 IS ON 60 00:02:36,867 --> 00:02:37,227 BACKWARDS. 61 00:02:37,233 --> 00:02:39,603 [BEEP] 62 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:40,370 >> ALRIGHT. 63 00:02:40,367 --> 00:02:41,697 AT THIS UPON THE IT MAKES MORE 64 00:02:41,700 --> 00:02:43,670 SENSE TO TURN IT ALL THE WAY 65 00:02:43,667 --> 00:02:44,067 AROUND. 66 00:02:44,067 --> 00:02:45,797 THIS IS DEFINITELY THE WRONG WAY 67 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:48,830 TO EAT A REESE'S. 68 00:02:48,833 --> 00:02:52,973 SHOCK LATE AND PEANUT BUTTER A 69 00:02:52,967 --> 00:02:53,767 CLASSIC COMBINATION. 70 00:02:53,767 --> 00:02:56,927 IS THAT EAGLE EYE CHERRY? 71 00:02:56,933 --> 00:03:00,573 BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE -- 72 00:03:00,567 --> 00:03:00,897 TONIGHT. 73 00:03:00,900 --> 00:03:03,070 ENOUGH FOR PLAY NOW SLATHER SOME 74 00:03:03,067 --> 00:03:03,827 ON YOUR DONG. 75 00:03:03,833 --> 00:03:07,173 THAT GUY MAKES A HEALTHY SNACK. 76 00:03:07,167 --> 00:03:08,067 [LAUGHING] 77 00:03:08,067 --> 00:03:12,197 >> THANK YOU. 78 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:15,230 >> NEVER MIND MY MOM USE TO MAKE 79 00:03:15,233 --> 00:03:17,873 THE BEST ANTS ON A LOG. 80 00:03:17,867 --> 00:03:21,527 SHE WOULD HOLD THE RAISINS AND 81 00:03:21,533 --> 00:03:22,933 PEANUT BUTTER. 82 00:03:22,933 --> 00:03:26,703 SHE WOULD PUT UP A SIDE OF RANCH 83 00:03:26,700 --> 00:03:29,530 AND BUFFALO WINGS. 84 00:03:29,533 --> 00:03:31,073 THAT WOMAN IS A SAINT. 85 00:03:31,067 --> 00:03:33,397 >> LOOK AT THIS HORNY OLD 86 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:33,770 SHRUFRPLT. 87 00:03:33,767 --> 00:03:36,067 >> SHE HAD NO DOUBTS ON WHAT SHE 88 00:03:36,067 --> 00:03:38,197 WANTED FOR A 100 YEAR BIRTHDAY 89 00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:38,570 PARTY. 90 00:03:38,567 --> 00:03:41,067 [LAUGHING] 91 00:03:41,067 --> 00:03:42,167 * 92 00:03:42,167 --> 00:03:43,067 [LAUGHING] 93 00:03:43,067 --> 00:03:46,297 >> GET YOUR ARTHRITIS RIDDLED 94 00:03:46,300 --> 00:03:49,700 HAND OFF THE DANCERS LADY. 95 00:03:49,700 --> 00:03:52,400 WHAT KIND OF AN ESTABLISHMENT DO 96 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:53,500 YOU THINK THIS IS. 97 00:03:53,500 --> 00:03:55,400 IT'S NOISE THEY DIDN'T TELL THE 98 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:58,230 DANCERS SHE HAS BEEN DEAD FOR 99 00:03:58,233 --> 00:03:59,673 THREE HOURS. 100 00:03:59,667 --> 00:04:05,627 IF SHE'S NOT CAREFUL THE QUILT 101 00:04:05,633 --> 00:04:07,573 SHE KNITTED WILL BE MOIST. 102 00:04:07,567 --> 00:04:10,067 WOULD I RATHER HAVE A 103 00:04:10,067 --> 00:04:12,097 100-YEAR-OLD STRIPPER NOW THAN A 104 00:04:12,100 --> 00:04:14,670 STRIPPER ON MY 100th BIRTHDAY. 105 00:04:14,667 --> 00:04:17,897 THAT'S HOW I PARTY. 106 00:04:17,900 --> 00:04:20,270 * 107 00:04:20,267 --> 00:04:22,227 >> ALRIGHT. 108 00:04:22,233 --> 00:04:28,473 >> WOO! YA! 109 00:04:28,467 --> 00:04:30,227 * 110 00:04:30,233 --> 00:04:36,303 >> WOO! 111 00:04:36,300 --> 00:04:37,400 >> THERE YOU GO. 112 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:40,130 >> THANK YOU. 113 00:04:40,133 --> 00:04:44,773 * 114 00:04:44,767 --> 00:04:46,067 >> OH. 115 00:04:46,067 --> 00:04:50,667 >> THANKS TO DEMI MOORE FOR 116 00:04:50,667 --> 00:04:51,497 STRIP TEASE. 117 00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:53,600 I CAN'T BELIEVE ASHTON CHEATED 118 00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:54,200 ON YOU. 119 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:56,700 YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL MATURE 120 00:04:56,700 --> 00:04:57,070 WOMAN. 121 00:04:57,067 --> 00:05:00,127 WHAT IS NEXT? 122 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,933 [BEEP] 123 00:05:01,933 --> 00:05:02,603 [BEEP] 124 00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:05,070 >> LOOKS LIKE WE HAVE A HOT BODY 125 00:05:05,067 --> 00:05:06,397 CONTEST ON OUR HANDS. 126 00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:10,800 SOMEONE JUST SAW REAL STEEL. 127 00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:14,430 TIME TO DO SHIRTS VERSUS SKINS 128 00:05:14,433 --> 00:05:15,973 IN THIS BREAKDOWN. 129 00:05:15,967 --> 00:05:17,297 WELCOME TO PHILADELPHIA WHERE 130 00:05:17,300 --> 00:05:19,300 EVEN THE WHITE PEOPLE ACT BLACK. 131 00:05:19,300 --> 00:05:24,370 NOT SURE WHO THEY'RE ARGUING 132 00:05:24,367 --> 00:05:24,827 ABOUT. 133 00:05:24,833 --> 00:05:27,673 MAYBE IT'S WHO GETS THE LAST 134 00:05:27,667 --> 00:05:28,067 CIALIS. 135 00:05:28,067 --> 00:05:30,467 YOU HAVE TO BE BRAVE TO RIP YOUR 136 00:05:30,467 --> 00:05:32,897 SHIRT IN PHILLY. 137 00:05:32,900 --> 00:05:34,600 IT'S THE CREAM CHEESE CAPITOL OF 138 00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:35,800 THE WORLD. 139 00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:37,470 NOTHING WRONG WITH SHOWING PRIDE 140 00:05:37,467 --> 00:05:38,667 IN YOUR NEXT. 141 00:05:38,667 --> 00:05:41,127 A BOLD DISPLAY OF CONFIDENCE. 142 00:05:41,133 --> 00:05:43,473 APPARENTLY THERE IS ONLY ROM FOR 143 00:05:43,467 --> 00:05:45,327 ONE MIDDLE AGED BALD MAN ON THIS 144 00:05:45,333 --> 00:05:46,473 SIDEWALK. 145 00:05:46,467 --> 00:05:47,427 >> HERE. 146 00:05:47,433 --> 00:05:49,273 >> THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER MESS 147 00:05:49,267 --> 00:05:52,667 WITH A MAN WEARING BITCHIN 148 00:05:52,667 --> 00:05:53,427 DESIGNER JEANS. 149 00:05:53,433 --> 00:05:56,803 THEY HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE. 150 00:05:56,800 --> 00:06:00,070 >> I HAVE FIFTH AND WASHINGTON 151 00:06:00,067 --> 00:06:02,927 IS WHERE A BIG BUNCH OF NANCY 152 00:06:02,933 --> 00:06:04,673 BOYS LIVE. 153 00:06:04,667 --> 00:06:07,667 GOOD THING HE'S WEARING HIS 154 00:06:07,667 --> 00:06:09,827 PAJAMA BOTTOMS THAT LIGHT JAB 155 00:06:09,833 --> 00:06:11,233 PUT HIM TO SLEEP. 156 00:06:11,233 --> 00:06:12,173 [BEEP] 157 00:06:12,167 --> 00:06:14,067 >> SURE KICKING A GUY IN THE 158 00:06:14,067 --> 00:06:16,197 RIBS WITH POINTY BOOTS IS A 159 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:19,070 DIRTY MOVE WHEN YOUR CITY SAVIOR 160 00:06:19,067 --> 00:06:20,397 IS MICHAEL VICK YOU STOP 161 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:22,270 WORRYING WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF 162 00:06:22,267 --> 00:06:22,667 YOU. 163 00:06:22,667 --> 00:06:27,467 THAT'S ENOUGH EXCITEMENT FOR YOU 164 00:06:27,467 --> 00:06:28,667 OLD TIMERS. 165 00:06:28,667 --> 00:06:29,897 IT'S ALMOST 4:00 P.M. AND YOU 166 00:06:29,900 --> 00:06:32,170 HAVE TO EAT YOUR SUPPER. 167 00:06:32,167 --> 00:06:33,927 WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH THE 168 00:06:33,933 --> 00:06:34,933 WEB INTERVENTION. 169 00:06:34,933 --> 00:06:36,673 FIRST I THINK SHE MIGHT BE 170 00:06:36,667 --> 00:06:38,797 DROOLING ON YOUR PILLOW. 171 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:41,070 >> WHY DOESN'T SOMEBODY -- 172 00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:43,597 [LAUGHING] 173 00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:51,870 >> OH, YA SHE DID. 174 00:06:51,867 --> 00:06:53,467 >> OH! 175 00:06:53,467 --> 00:07:00,327 [LAUGHING] 176 00:07:00,333 --> 00:07:00,703 >> 102. 177 00:07:00,700 --> 00:07:01,100 >> HI. 178 00:07:01,100 --> 00:07:02,070 >> IT'S OKAY. 179 00:07:02,067 --> 00:07:03,067 >> IT'S OKAY. 180 00:07:03,067 --> 00:07:04,697 >> IT'S OKAY. 181 00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:06,070 >> -- THIS IS THE LAST TIME. 182 00:07:06,067 --> 00:07:07,367 >> IT'S OKAY. 183 00:07:07,367 --> 00:07:09,397 I UNDERSTAND. 184 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:11,700 >> IS I'M GOING TO DIE. 185 00:07:11,700 --> 00:07:14,100 [LAUGHING] 186 00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,230 >> -- IT'S OKAY. 187 00:07:15,233 --> 00:07:20,173 I CAN FEEL IT AND HEAR THIS ONE. 188 00:07:20,167 --> 00:07:23,297 [LAUGHING] 189 00:07:26,867 --> 00:07:28,497 >> THIS IS GOING TO DIE THOUGH. 190 00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:30,200 THIS IS GOING TO DIE THOUGH. 191 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:31,700 >> REMEMBER YOUR MOM IS WORRIED 192 00:07:31,700 --> 00:07:33,100 ABOUT YOU. 193 00:07:33,100 --> 00:07:33,400 RELAX. 194 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:34,100 >> MOM! 195 00:07:34,100 --> 00:07:36,930 >> YOUR MOM IS A NARC. 196 00:07:36,933 --> 00:07:39,603 >> THAT EXPERIMENTAL DRUG USER 197 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:41,230 LITTLE AT HOME IS TIM. 198 00:07:41,233 --> 00:07:44,703 HE WAS TRIPPING ON SHROOMS. 199 00:07:44,700 --> 00:07:49,200 I DON'T USE DRUGS. 200 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:52,300 WHEN YOUR REALITY IS FABULOUS 201 00:07:52,300 --> 00:07:54,900 YOU DON'T NODE TO. 202 00:07:54,900 --> 00:07:56,600 HEROIN HAS ZERO CALORIES AND 203 00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:59,100 GIVES YOU A LEAN LOOK. 204 00:07:59,100 --> 00:08:01,500 ANYTHING BEATS LIVING IN A 205 00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,630 CHURCH BASEMENT AND WORKING 12 206 00:08:03,633 --> 00:08:04,333 STEPS. 207 00:08:04,333 --> 00:08:05,773 ESPECIALLY NUMBER 9. 208 00:08:05,767 --> 00:08:09,867 SOME ADDICTS BECOME BORN AGAIN 209 00:08:09,867 --> 00:08:12,397 CHRISTIANS DURING RECOVERY . 210 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:14,670 JESUS MAY FORGIVE YOU BUT YOU 211 00:08:14,667 --> 00:08:16,767 OWE ME $1200. 212 00:08:16,767 --> 00:08:19,927 YOU TOOK 16 OXYCODONE INSTEAD OF 213 00:08:19,933 --> 00:08:20,473 ONE. 214 00:08:20,467 --> 00:08:22,327 THE TRAGEDY IS THAT HEATH 215 00:08:22,333 --> 00:08:23,233 COULDN'T COUNT. 216 00:08:23,233 --> 00:08:29,403 I WATCHED EVERY SEASON OF 217 00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:31,800 CELEBRITY REHAB AND IT NEVER 218 00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:32,270 WORKS. 219 00:08:32,267 --> 00:08:34,927 ADDICTION IS NOT A DISEASE YOU 220 00:08:34,933 --> 00:08:36,533 CAN'T STOP HAVING CANCER. 221 00:08:36,533 --> 00:08:39,073 YOU CAN STOP SNORTING COKE. 222 00:08:39,067 --> 00:08:41,527 STEVE JOBS HAD A DISEASE. 223 00:08:41,533 --> 00:08:44,303 STEVE-O HAD BAD PARENTS. 224 00:08:44,300 --> 00:08:46,130 TIM MADE TERRIBLE LIFE CHOICES. 225 00:08:46,133 --> 00:08:49,273 I DID WHAT ANYONE WOULD DO I 226 00:08:49,267 --> 00:08:51,867 EXPOSED HIM IN THIS WEEK'S WEB 227 00:08:51,867 --> 00:08:53,067 INTERVENTION. 228 00:08:53,067 --> 00:08:54,467 >> HI. 229 00:08:54,467 --> 00:08:56,927 >> IT'S OKAY. 230 00:08:59,433 --> 00:09:02,673 >> AHHH! 231 00:09:12,667 --> 00:09:15,067 >> I LOVE YOU THIS IS GOING TO 232 00:09:15,067 --> 00:09:15,567 DIE THOUGH. 233 00:09:15,567 --> 00:09:17,397 >> WHERE ARE YOU FROM, TIM? 234 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:19,170 >> APPLETON, WISCONSIN. 235 00:09:19,167 --> 00:09:20,767 >> WHAT'S THE BEST THING TO DO 236 00:09:20,767 --> 00:09:22,827 IN APPLETON BESIDES DRUGS. 237 00:09:22,833 --> 00:09:25,273 >> MY FAVORITE THING TO DO IS GO 238 00:09:25,267 --> 00:09:27,297 FOR LONG WALKS AND LOOK FOR 239 00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:28,900 CELLPHONE TOWERS. 240 00:09:28,900 --> 00:09:30,470 SO I CAN AVOID BEING CLOSE TO 241 00:09:30,467 --> 00:09:30,767 THEM. 242 00:09:30,767 --> 00:09:33,327 >> WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING? 243 00:09:33,333 --> 00:09:36,573 >> I AM CURRENTLY UNDER EMPLOYED 244 00:09:36,567 --> 00:09:37,097 AT PIZZA HUT. 245 00:09:37,100 --> 00:09:38,700 >> I LIKE UNDER EMPLOYED. 246 00:09:38,700 --> 00:09:40,530 >> TELL ME ABOUT THE VIDEO. 247 00:09:40,533 --> 00:09:42,133 WHEN WAS THAT, WHAT HAPPENED. 248 00:09:42,133 --> 00:09:43,833 >> THAT WAS TWO SUMMERS AGO. 249 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:45,333 I ATE A MUSHROOM. 250 00:09:45,333 --> 00:09:46,933 MY MOM CAME HOME. 251 00:09:46,933 --> 00:09:49,203 I WAS SAYING THINGS THAT DIDN'T 252 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:49,870 MAKE SENSE. 253 00:09:49,867 --> 00:09:51,227 I SAID MUSHROOMS. 254 00:09:51,233 --> 00:09:52,733 ANOTHER THING I SAID WAS I'M 255 00:09:52,733 --> 00:09:53,473 GOING TO DIE. 256 00:09:53,467 --> 00:09:54,727 SHE CALLED 911. 257 00:09:54,733 --> 00:09:55,833 THEY ALSO HAD A POLICE OFFICER 258 00:09:55,833 --> 00:09:56,573 WITH THEM. 259 00:09:56,567 --> 00:09:58,497 THAT SCARED ME SO I WAS LIKE 260 00:09:58,500 --> 00:10:00,170 OKAY, I'M GOING TO LIE DOWN ON 261 00:10:00,167 --> 00:10:01,267 THE GROUND NOW. 262 00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:02,327 >> YOU WERE NAKED. 263 00:10:02,333 --> 00:10:03,103 >> OH, YA. 264 00:10:03,100 --> 00:10:06,000 >> DID YOU GET RUG BURN ON YOUR 265 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:06,470 WEINER? 266 00:10:06,467 --> 00:10:08,727 >> I DON'T RECALL THAT BUT ONCE 267 00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:10,833 THE COP STRAPPED ME TO TABLES 268 00:10:10,833 --> 00:10:13,033 YOU DON'T WANT TO DO THAT TO 269 00:10:13,033 --> 00:10:16,173 SOMEONE EATING A HALLUCINOGENIC. 270 00:10:16,167 --> 00:10:18,497 >> DID YOU THINK YOU COULD BREAK 271 00:10:18,500 --> 00:10:21,030 OUT OF THE RESTRAINTS BY MAKING 272 00:10:21,033 --> 00:10:21,803 EXPLOSION NOISES? 273 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:23,400 >> I THOUGHT THAT WAS PART OF 274 00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,100 THE WHOLE I WAS GOING TO DIE 275 00:10:25,100 --> 00:10:25,400 THING. 276 00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:27,130 THAT THEY WERE ACTUALLY GOING TO 277 00:10:27,133 --> 00:10:28,973 SQUEEZE THE AIR OUT OF MY LUNGS. 278 00:10:28,967 --> 00:10:30,567 >> DID YOU END UP DYING. 279 00:10:30,567 --> 00:10:33,827 >> I THINK I CAME INFINITILY 280 00:10:33,833 --> 00:10:35,073 CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MOMENT 281 00:10:35,067 --> 00:10:36,667 OF DIEING AND WAS REBORN. 282 00:10:36,667 --> 00:10:38,067 >> YOU MIGHT BE JESUS. 283 00:10:38,067 --> 00:10:42,967 >> WELL LET'S NOT GO OVERBOARD. 284 00:10:42,967 --> 00:10:45,267 >> WHY WOULDN'T THEY LET YOU 285 00:10:45,267 --> 00:10:46,227 GRAB YOUR BALLS? 286 00:10:46,233 --> 00:10:47,573 >> THAT BOTHERS ME. 287 00:10:47,567 --> 00:10:49,567 >> WHEN A MAN HAS TO TOUCH HIS 288 00:10:49,567 --> 00:10:52,027 BALLS YOU HAVE TO RESPECT THAT. 289 00:10:52,033 --> 00:10:53,373 >> GRAB A SHOVE HE WILL. 290 00:10:53,367 --> 00:10:55,197 >> WHY DID YOU ASK YOUR MOTHER 291 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:56,200 FOR A SHOVE HE WILL? 292 00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:58,030 >> SO SHE COULD HELP GET THESE 293 00:10:58,033 --> 00:11:00,703 PEOPLE AWAY AND FRO ME FROM THE 294 00:11:00,700 --> 00:11:01,400 TABLE. 295 00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:03,230 >> SHOVE HE WILL IS THE GO TO. 296 00:11:03,233 --> 00:11:03,873 >> I GUESS. 297 00:11:03,867 --> 00:11:05,967 >> YOU FORGAVE YOURSELF FOR 298 00:11:05,967 --> 00:11:07,067 EATING ALL THE MEAT. 299 00:11:07,067 --> 00:11:09,067 THAT MEANS YOU'RE A PRETTY PURE 300 00:11:09,067 --> 00:11:10,927 PERSON THAT, THAT THOUGHT CAME 301 00:11:10,933 --> 00:11:12,533 TO YOUR MIND. 302 00:11:12,533 --> 00:11:16,303 >> NAH. 303 00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:17,830 >> IT WOULD BE WORST IF YOU 304 00:11:17,833 --> 00:11:19,873 TALKED ABOUT THE KID YOU KILLED 305 00:11:19,867 --> 00:11:22,697 AND BURIED IN THE BACK YARD. 306 00:11:22,700 --> 00:11:24,470 ARE YOU COMFORTABLE BEING NAKED 307 00:11:24,467 --> 00:11:26,097 IN FRONT OF YOUR MOTHER? 308 00:11:26,100 --> 00:11:26,700 >> YES. 309 00:11:26,700 --> 00:11:27,570 I WAS BEFORE THIS. 310 00:11:27,567 --> 00:11:29,967 >> DOES YOUR MOTHER KNOW HOW TO 311 00:11:29,967 --> 00:11:31,667 REACT WHEN YOU'RE ON SHROOMS. 312 00:11:31,667 --> 00:11:33,427 >> I HAVEN'T DONE THEM SINCE. 313 00:11:33,433 --> 00:11:35,073 >> NOT ONE TIME SINCE THEN. 314 00:11:35,067 --> 00:11:35,797 >> NO. 315 00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:37,600 I'M NOT BIG INTO DRUGS AT ALL. 316 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:39,870 >> DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING ELSE ON 317 00:11:39,867 --> 00:11:41,597 YOUR RECORD? 318 00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:42,600 >> MARIJUANA POSSESSION. 319 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:44,630 I MIGHT AS WELL JUST TELL THE 320 00:11:44,633 --> 00:11:45,073 WORLDMENT. 321 00:11:45,067 --> 00:11:47,697 >> DOES THAT MAKE YOU MORE 322 00:11:47,700 --> 00:11:48,900 POPULAR IN THE HOMETOWN? 323 00:11:48,900 --> 00:11:50,900 >> ONLY WHEN I TOLD TWO OR THREE 324 00:11:50,900 --> 00:11:53,130 PEOPLE I WAS COMING HERE TO DO. 325 00:11:53,133 --> 00:11:53,433 THIS. 326 00:11:53,433 --> 00:11:55,503 >> THIS WILL OPEN MORE DOORS FOR 327 00:11:55,500 --> 00:11:55,770 YOU. 328 00:11:55,767 --> 00:11:56,827 >> I DON'T KNOW. 329 00:11:56,833 --> 00:11:58,333 >> PIZZA HUT WILL HAVE A LONG 330 00:11:58,333 --> 00:11:58,633 LINE. 331 00:11:58,633 --> 00:12:00,833 >> LET'S GET OUT OF HERE I HAVE 332 00:12:00,833 --> 00:12:02,473 TICKETS FOR THE PLANETARIUM. 333 00:12:02,467 --> 00:12:03,367 >> ALRIGHT. 334 00:12:03,367 --> 00:12:04,297 COOL. 335 00:12:04,300 --> 00:12:06,400 >> WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? 336 00:12:06,400 --> 00:12:07,170 >> SURPRISE. 337 00:12:07,167 --> 00:12:08,897 >> THIS ISN'T A LASER LIGHT 338 00:12:08,900 --> 00:12:09,200 SHOW. 339 00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:10,370 IT'S A INTERVENTION. 340 00:12:10,367 --> 00:12:12,127 THESE PEOPLE LOVE YOU LIKE 341 00:12:12,133 --> 00:12:12,433 CRAZY. 342 00:12:12,433 --> 00:12:13,933 I WANT YOU TO HEAR THEM OUT. 343 00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:15,533 >> HI, MOM, DAD. 344 00:12:15,533 --> 00:12:16,773 WHAT ARE THE REST OF THE PEOPLE 345 00:12:16,767 --> 00:12:17,697 DOING HERE. 346 00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:19,400 >> GUESS THEY'RE HERE EAR LEE 347 00:12:19,400 --> 00:12:21,070 FOR THE NEXT INTERVENTION. 348 00:12:21,067 --> 00:12:22,427 KWREURPBLGTS A CLOWN. 349 00:12:22,433 --> 00:12:24,273 >> BECAUSE HE'S A TKEBGTED TO 350 00:12:24,267 --> 00:12:26,567 SMILES AND I INVITED HIM THESE 351 00:12:26,567 --> 00:12:28,767 THINGS ARE SO DEPRESSING. 352 00:12:28,767 --> 00:12:30,597 >> WE'RE HERE TODAY BECAUSE WE 353 00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:32,700 WANTED A FREE TRIP TO L.A. 354 00:12:32,700 --> 00:12:34,370 >> WE DON'T THINK YOU HAVE A 355 00:12:34,367 --> 00:12:34,697 PROBLEM. 356 00:12:34,700 --> 00:12:37,930 >> I JOTTED DOWN A FEW THINGS 357 00:12:37,933 --> 00:12:38,273 TOO. 358 00:12:38,267 --> 00:12:41,527 >> YOUR LIFE IS -- WHEN YOU DO 359 00:12:41,533 --> 00:12:43,803 DRUGS YOU TURN MY HEART INTO A 360 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:47,530 BIG BLACK JELLY BEAN. 361 00:12:47,533 --> 00:12:47,903 [LAUGHING] 362 00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:49,970 >> I KNEW IT WAS A GOOD IDEA 363 00:12:49,967 --> 00:12:50,967 INVITING THIS GUY. 364 00:12:50,967 --> 00:12:52,767 >> TIMOTHY, BECAUSE OF YOUR DRUG 365 00:12:52,767 --> 00:12:54,897 USE I GOT TO SEE YOU NAKED. 366 00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:56,670 THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT OKAY. 367 00:12:56,667 --> 00:12:58,327 AFTER HEARING YOUR PARENTS 368 00:12:58,333 --> 00:13:00,973 LETTER I'M NOT SURE YOU HAVE HIT 369 00:13:00,967 --> 00:13:02,527 ROCK BOTTOM YET. 370 00:13:02,533 --> 00:13:04,633 I'M RESCINDING THE GIFT OF REHAB 371 00:13:04,633 --> 00:13:05,633 UNTIL YOU. 372 00:13:05,633 --> 00:13:06,233 DO HERE WE GO. 373 00:13:06,233 --> 00:13:08,433 >> OKAY WHAT DID YOU GET. 374 00:13:08,433 --> 00:13:12,273 >> BATH SALTS, AIR SALT AND 375 00:13:12,267 --> 00:13:12,597 JINKIN. 376 00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:18,300 >> WHAT'S JINKIN?FOR 377 00:13:18,300 --> 00:13:20,870 >> FOR MEN WHO PEE IN POOP. 378 00:13:20,867 --> 00:13:22,297 >> I DON'T FEEL ANYTHING. 379 00:13:22,300 --> 00:13:25,330 >> I DON'T THINK IT'S WORKING. 380 00:13:25,333 --> 00:13:26,903 [BEEP] 381 00:13:26,900 --> 00:13:29,470 >> ONE LAST TIME -- 382 00:13:29,467 --> 00:13:32,967 I CAN HEAR THIS ONE. 383 00:13:32,967 --> 00:13:35,267 >> MOM GET THE SHOVEL! 384 00:13:35,267 --> 00:13:37,067 >> GRAB MY BALLS. 385 00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:38,397 >> AM I GOING TO DIE. 386 00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:39,800 >> THIS IS GOING TO DIE. 387 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:41,400 THIS IS GOING TO DO I. 388 00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:44,430 DIE, THIS IS GOING TO DIE. 389 00:13:44,433 --> 00:13:45,673 DIE THOUGH. 390 00:13:45,667 --> 00:13:48,197 >> I CAN NOT BELIEVE THIS 391 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:50,070 HAPPENED AGAIN. 392 00:13:50,067 --> 00:13:52,627 >> DID WE KILL A CLOWN LAST 393 00:13:52,633 --> 00:13:52,933 NIGHT. 394 00:13:52,933 --> 00:13:54,073 >> ROCK BOTTOM. 395 00:13:54,067 --> 00:13:56,427 I THINK YOU'RE READY FOR REHAB. 396 00:13:56,433 --> 00:13:59,403 READY TO TAKE YOUR LIFE BACK? 397 00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:00,700 (KNOCKING ON THE DOR ). 398 00:14:00,700 --> 00:14:03,070 >> WELCOME TO REHAB. 399 00:14:03,067 --> 00:14:03,927 >> AMY WINEHOUSE. 400 00:14:03,933 --> 00:14:05,173 BUT YOU'RE -- 401 00:14:05,167 --> 00:14:07,727 >> WE MUST OF OVERDOSED 402 00:14:07,733 --> 00:14:08,073 [BEEP] 403 00:14:08,067 --> 00:14:09,097 >> ARE YOU DRINKING? 404 00:14:09,100 --> 00:14:09,930 >> YA. 405 00:14:09,933 --> 00:14:10,903 THIS IS HEAVEN. 406 00:14:10,900 --> 00:14:13,070 YOU CAN DRINK IN REHAB HERE. 407 00:14:13,067 --> 00:14:14,367 COME ON IN. 408 00:14:14,367 --> 00:14:17,767 >> WHY ARE THE JONAS BROTHERS 409 00:14:17,767 --> 00:14:18,127 HERE. 410 00:14:18,133 --> 00:14:18,673 THEY'RE NOT DEAD. 411 00:14:18,667 --> 00:14:20,427 >> BECAUSE THIS WON'T AIR FOR 412 00:14:20,433 --> 00:14:21,403 FOUR WEEKS. 413 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:23,330 HOW AMAZING IT WOULD IT BE IF 414 00:14:23,333 --> 00:14:28,633 THEY ALL ACTUALLY DIED. 415 00:14:28,633 --> 00:14:31,073 [ APPLAUSE ] 416 00:14:31,067 --> 00:14:31,897 >> TOPICAL. 417 00:14:31,900 --> 00:14:34,730 WE SHOT THAT AMY WINEHOUSE'S 418 00:14:34,733 --> 00:14:36,603 DEATH WAS STILL IN THE NEWS. 419 00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:38,300 WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK BUT FIRST 420 00:14:38,300 --> 00:14:39,930 LET'S CLEAN THE SHOW UP. 421 00:14:39,933 --> 00:14:43,773 [LAUGHING] 422 00:14:55,100 --> 00:14:59,330 * 423 00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:02,073 >> IT'S IN THIS DRIVE-THRU IN 424 00:15:02,067 --> 00:15:03,597 STARBUCKS WHERE MORE AND MORE 425 00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:05,570 PEOPLE ARE PICKING UP A STORY 426 00:15:05,567 --> 00:15:08,497 LIKE THE ONE THAT LINDA GREEN 427 00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:09,200 NOW TELLS. 428 00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:11,300 >> WE PULLED UP TO THE ONE 429 00:15:11,300 --> 00:15:11,600 DOUGH. 430 00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:13,100 THE GIRL IN THE WINDOW SAYS 431 00:15:13,100 --> 00:15:15,430 THERE IS NO CHARGE TODAY. 432 00:15:15,433 --> 00:15:17,503 >> THE WOMAN IN FRONT OF HIM 433 00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:18,230 PAID HIS BILL. 434 00:15:18,233 --> 00:15:21,133 >> IT TOOK MY BREATH AWAY FOR A 435 00:15:21,133 --> 00:15:21,473 MINUTE. 436 00:15:21,467 --> 00:15:22,767 IT WAS A WONDERFUL SURPRISE. 437 00:15:22,767 --> 00:15:24,927 OUT OF THE BLUE. 438 00:15:24,933 --> 00:15:28,673 >> GREEN THEN DECIDED TO PAY FOR 439 00:15:28,667 --> 00:15:29,827 THE GUY BEHIND HIM. 440 00:15:29,833 --> 00:15:31,873 >> IF I SAW THAT GUY BEHIND ME I 441 00:15:31,867 --> 00:15:32,797 WOULD WAIT. 442 00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:35,230 NEVER THE LESS NICE GESTURES 443 00:15:35,233 --> 00:15:36,973 ARE CONTAGIOUS AND CAN MAKE THE 444 00:15:36,967 --> 00:15:40,327 WORLD A IS PLEASANT PLEASE. 445 00:15:40,333 --> 00:15:42,933 SADLY I FOUND OUT BEING UNKIND 446 00:15:42,933 --> 00:15:44,373 HAS A SIMILAR EFFECT. 447 00:15:44,367 --> 00:15:46,397 >> WHAT ARE YOU WEARING? 448 00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:50,930 >> A RACIST CHRISTMAS TREE 449 00:15:50,933 --> 00:15:52,303 [LAUGHING] 450 00:15:52,300 --> 00:15:54,830 >> YOU WENT TO WORK IN THIS? 451 00:15:54,833 --> 00:15:55,833 >> YOU LOOK CUTE. 452 00:15:55,833 --> 00:15:57,773 >> I LOOK LIKE A STUPID LITTLE 453 00:15:57,767 --> 00:15:58,897 BOY. 454 00:15:58,900 --> 00:16:02,600 >> SORRY. 455 00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:04,430 >> I LOVE YOU, MITCHELL. 456 00:16:04,433 --> 00:16:06,273 >> I CAN'T DO THIS. 457 00:16:06,267 --> 00:16:08,367 THIS IS FUN BUT I WAS JUST DOING 458 00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:11,427 IT TO GET BACK AT MY HUSBAND. 459 00:16:11,433 --> 00:16:13,403 HE'S FROM ALABAMA AND IT WOULD 460 00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:15,300 REALLY UPSET HIM. 461 00:16:15,300 --> 00:16:17,430 BESIDES WE HAVE A CHILD 462 00:16:17,433 --> 00:16:17,803 TOGETHER. 463 00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:19,500 >> BESIDES WE HAVE A CHILD 464 00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:19,870 TOGETHER. 465 00:16:19,867 --> 00:16:21,097 WE HAVE A CHILD TOGETHER. 466 00:16:21,100 --> 00:16:25,970 >> I LOVE YOU, MICHELLE. 467 00:16:25,967 --> 00:16:27,367 >> CAN I HELP YOU? 468 00:16:27,367 --> 00:16:28,967 >> I WOULD LIKE SOME CHOCOLATE 469 00:16:28,967 --> 00:16:29,967 CHIP COOKIES. 470 00:16:29,967 --> 00:16:31,467 >> SORRY WE'RE ALL OUT. 471 00:16:31,467 --> 00:16:34,267 OUR BAKER HAD TO LEAVE EARLY HIS 472 00:16:34,267 --> 00:16:36,067 DAUGHTER GOT BLOWN UP AT DAY 473 00:16:36,067 --> 00:16:36,627 CARE. 474 00:16:36,633 --> 00:16:38,133 >> I AM HAVING THE WORST DAY 475 00:16:38,133 --> 00:16:39,173 EVER. 476 00:16:39,167 --> 00:16:41,567 ALL I WANTED WAS TWO COOKIES. 477 00:16:41,567 --> 00:16:42,397 >> A MUFFIN. 478 00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:44,600 >> I DON'T WANT A MUFFIN. 479 00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:46,770 >> WHAT DID WE LEARN FROM THIS? 480 00:16:46,767 --> 00:16:48,897 IF THE PEOPLE WHO WORKED ON THIS 481 00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:50,500 SHOW HAD FASHION SENSE THE 482 00:16:50,500 --> 00:16:52,830 BABIES WOULD BE ALIEVE AND I 483 00:16:52,833 --> 00:16:56,333 WOULD HAVE SOME GODDAMN COOKIES. 484 00:16:56,333 --> 00:17:01,303 DON'T FORGET TO UPDATE ON OUR 485 00:17:01,300 --> 00:17:02,900 BLOG TO BE A CHANCE AT OUR 486 00:17:02,900 --> 00:17:03,530 VIEWER VIDEO. 487 00:17:03,533 --> 00:17:09,473 THIS COMES FROM -- 488 00:17:09,467 --> 00:17:10,197 [BEEP] 489 00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:10,870 [BEEP] 490 00:17:10,867 --> 00:17:12,067 [BEEP] 491 00:17:12,067 --> 00:17:15,597 [BEEP] 492 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:17,130 >> THAT'S A LOT TO TAKE IN. 493 00:17:17,133 --> 00:17:19,433 WHAT HE SAID IS I POOPED ON MY 494 00:17:19,433 --> 00:17:21,533 PENIS BUT WITH MUCH DIRTIER 495 00:17:21,533 --> 00:17:21,873 WORDS. 496 00:17:21,867 --> 00:17:23,367 LET'S SEE IT ONE MORE TIME SO 497 00:17:23,367 --> 00:17:26,067 YOU CAN APPRECIATE ALL THE 498 00:17:26,067 --> 00:17:30,467 SUBTLETIES. 499 00:17:30,467 --> 00:17:31,897 >> NOTHING [BEEP] 500 00:17:31,900 --> 00:17:33,930 >> I [BEEP] MY OWN [BEEP] 501 00:17:33,933 --> 00:17:36,073 >> YOU [BEEP] ON YOUR OWN [BEEP] 502 00:17:36,067 --> 00:17:40,067 >> I [BEEP] ON MY [BEEP] 503 00:17:40,067 --> 00:17:42,127 >> THE ONLY PROBLEM I HAVE WITH 504 00:17:42,133 --> 00:17:47,103 THAT VIDEO IS THE NAME OF THEIR 505 00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:48,470 DUMB SKETCH CREW. 506 00:17:48,467 --> 00:17:50,527 CAN YOU KNOCK IT OFF WITH YOUR 507 00:17:50,533 --> 00:17:58,503 STUPID COMEDY NAMES. 508 00:17:58,500 --> 00:18:01,370 >> WELCOME BACK BUCKAS. 509 00:18:01,367 --> 00:18:04,097 IF EVERYONE IN HERE CAN KEEP 510 00:18:04,100 --> 00:18:06,670 THEIR TRAP SHUT YOU WILL RECEIVE 511 00:18:06,667 --> 00:18:07,797 FRO TATTOOS. 512 00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:11,500 NEXT WEEK THIS MAGICIAN GETS A 513 00:18:11,500 --> 00:18:15,900 WEB REDEMPTION. 514 00:18:15,900 --> 00:18:18,670 >> TADA, HIS ARM DISAPPEARED. 515 00:18:18,667 --> 00:18:20,697 FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER TO LIVE 516 00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:22,530 CHAT DURING THE SHOWS. 517 00:18:22,533 --> 00:18:24,603 KEEP UP WITH OUR BLOG AND COME 518 00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:26,900 SEE ME ON TOUR OVER THE 519 00:18:26,900 --> 00:18:27,300 HOLIDAYS. 520 00:18:27,300 --> 00:18:29,370 SOMETIMES IN THE OFFICE WE SAY 521 00:18:29,367 --> 00:18:31,497 RANDOM THINGS I THINK ARE SO 522 00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:32,830 HYSTERICAL AND NEVER MAKE IT 523 00:18:32,833 --> 00:18:33,433 INTO THE SHOW. 524 00:18:33,433 --> 00:18:35,773 WE SAVE THEM FOR THE GEM FILE. 525 00:18:35,767 --> 00:18:38,167 THE REALITY IS WE HAVEN'T USED A 526 00:18:38,167 --> 00:18:39,067 SINGLE ONE. 527 00:18:39,067 --> 00:18:40,427 LET'S READ THEM ALL NOW. 528 00:18:40,433 --> 00:18:42,833 BLACK GUYS FROM OTHER COUNTRIES 529 00:18:42,833 --> 00:18:44,103 AREN'T REALLY BLACK GUYS. 530 00:18:44,100 --> 00:18:45,700 TRUE. 531 00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:48,300 >> I DON'T KNOW WHY IT'S TRUE. 532 00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:51,800 THE WAY I FEEL ABOUT IT IT'S 533 00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:53,400 LIKE ROB SCHNEIDER INTRODUCING 534 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:54,630 HIM AS A COMEDIAN. 535 00:18:54,633 --> 00:18:57,473 NO YOU'RE ADAM SANDLER'S FRIEND. 536 00:18:57,467 --> 00:19:01,867 >> WHAT KIND OF ANIMAL -- 537 00:19:01,867 --> 00:19:03,927 CAME UP WITH A CERTAIN LENGTH OF 538 00:19:03,933 --> 00:19:05,833 NAILS WHICH MEANS THEY HAD OVER 539 00:19:05,833 --> 00:19:07,533 SHOT IT AT ONE POINT. 540 00:19:07,533 --> 00:19:08,073 [LAUGHING] 541 00:19:08,067 --> 00:19:11,127 >> THE TV SHOW SLEDGE HAMMER 542 00:19:11,133 --> 00:19:12,703 EXAMPLE NOT SINCE I WATCHED THE 543 00:19:12,700 --> 00:19:15,730 SHOW SLEDGE HAMMER HAVE I SEEN A 544 00:19:15,733 --> 00:19:16,873 NEGOTIATION GO SO BADLY. 545 00:19:16,867 --> 00:19:19,697 CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING A SLEDGE 546 00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:21,330 HAMMER FAN AND THAT CAME ON. 547 00:19:21,333 --> 00:19:23,373 MOM, COME IN THE SLEDGE HAMMER 548 00:19:23,367 --> 00:19:24,967 JOKE IT WAS ON FOR ONE AND A 549 00:19:24,967 --> 00:19:27,367 HALF SEASON IN LIKE 88. 550 00:19:27,367 --> 00:19:30,467 A WOMAN'S VAGINA A VENT. 551 00:19:30,467 --> 00:19:32,927 WE ALWAYS GOT TO KEEP S&P ON 552 00:19:32,933 --> 00:19:33,903 THEIR TOES. 553 00:19:33,900 --> 00:19:35,230 WE HAVE TO COME UP WITH THINGS 554 00:19:35,233 --> 00:19:38,073 TO CALL THE VAGINA. 555 00:19:38,067 --> 00:19:41,667 SO THAT WE DON'T GET BLEEPED. 556 00:19:41,667 --> 00:19:44,067 JOEY ADAMS HAS DONE MORE FOR 557 00:19:44,067 --> 00:19:46,427 FLAT CHESTED WOMAN IN AMERICA. 558 00:19:46,433 --> 00:19:47,633 I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE REST OF 559 00:19:47,633 --> 00:19:49,233 THE JOKE WOULD BE BUT THE FIRST 560 00:19:49,233 --> 00:19:50,773 PART IS SO SOLID. 561 00:19:50,767 --> 00:19:52,897 LIKE FOR AWHILE I WAS LIKE NO I 562 00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:54,630 WOULD TOTALLY DATE A FLAT 563 00:19:54,633 --> 00:19:55,733 CHESTED GIRL. 564 00:19:55,733 --> 00:19:58,403 THEN THE MOVIES RAN THEIR COURSE 565 00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:00,400 AND EVERYBODY -- KNOCK IT OFF. 566 00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:02,570 GIVE ME SOME TITTIES. 567 00:20:02,567 --> 00:20:04,427 THE KIND OF PEOPLE WHO GET 568 00:20:04,433 --> 00:20:06,133 MEXICAN FAST FOOD FOR HERE ARE 569 00:20:06,133 --> 00:20:07,603 THE KIND OF PEOPLE WHO DON'T 570 00:20:07,600 --> 00:20:09,870 MIND GETTING CAUGHT UP IN A HATE 571 00:20:09,867 --> 00:20:10,297 FIGHT. 572 00:20:10,300 --> 00:20:12,130 I HAVE A FEELING THE VIDEO 573 00:20:12,133 --> 00:20:14,303 THAT'S MEANT FOR IS EXTREMELY 574 00:20:14,300 --> 00:20:14,630 RACIST. 575 00:20:14,633 --> 00:20:17,403 LIKE YOUR GRADUATE IN NUTRITION 576 00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:18,900 THEY'RE BOTH MEANING LESS PIECES 577 00:20:18,900 --> 00:20:19,430 OF [BEEP]. 578 00:20:19,433 --> 00:20:20,833 THAT WAS ABOUT SOMEONE VERY 579 00:20:20,833 --> 00:20:21,873 CLOSE TO ME. 580 00:20:21,867 --> 00:20:24,097 TOSHING IT OUT THERE. 581 00:20:24,100 --> 00:20:25,130 [LAUGHING] 582 00:20:25,133 --> 00:20:27,633 >> WHY ARE YOU NOT USING THAT IN 583 00:20:27,633 --> 00:20:29,103 YOUR LIFE. 584 00:20:29,100 --> 00:20:31,600 JUST TOSHING IT OUT. 585 00:20:31,600 --> 00:20:33,300 THERE THAT WAS THREE YEARS WORTH 586 00:20:33,300 --> 00:20:35,400 OF SOLID MATERIAL. 587 00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,200 ENJOY YOUR CORN DOGS, GOOD 588 00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:39,700 NIGHT. 589 00:20:47,500 --> 00:20:49,300 >> ARE YOU A MAMA'S BOY. 590 00:20:49,300 --> 00:20:50,300 >> I LOVE HER. 591 00:20:50,300 --> 00:20:51,700 I TRY TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE 592 00:20:51,700 --> 00:20:54,130 AND GET ON WITH MY LIFE SO I CAN 593 00:20:54,133 --> 00:20:55,173 FOCUS AND BE A MAN. 36330

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