All language subtitles for Mary.Janes.Not.A.Virgin.Anymore.1996.1080p.BluRay.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

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(sultry jazz music)

Steve

There's something I have to tell you.

I'm a virgin.

It's okay.

I Love you.

Let me show you.

(sultry jazz music)

[Girl] Oh Steve.

Ow.

[Steve] What's up, are you alright?

No.

Wait.

If you'd just fucking
relax it wouldn't be so bad.

[Jane] I'm trying okay.

(grunting)

- You cum yet?
- No.

Are you going to?

Steve this is really uncomfortable.

[Steve] What you want me to stop?

Yes stop, just stop okay,
just get get off me now.

(rock and roll music)

You work here?

Is it always this totally rad?

I mean I can't believe your boss lets you

throw parties here like when
it's closed and everything.

Dude, that's so rad.

(vehicle approaching)

(rock and roll music)

[Jane] How's it going, you're back.

[Ericka] Yeah I'm back.

Here, bow was your tour?

Oh man, it was three weeks of insanity.

Now I'm just glad to
be back in the Midwest.

How was your date with Steve?

I really don't want to talk about it.

That bad, yeah and it only
gets worse from here right?

Hey this is a, this is, this is...

George.

Yeah this is George.

Hey George.

I saw them in San Francisco and decided

it was my duty to become
Ericka's love slave.

Yeah, we haven’t been able
to get rid of him ever since.

Where's my beer, where'd my beer go?

I'll get it.

Thank God he's supposed to ride

back with Babes in Toyland soon.

Yeah you know, I'll see you guys.

Okay bye.

Bye.

Hi Jane.

Hey Ryan.

So are you and Steve
boyfriend and girlfriend now?

Hardly.

What's wrong, you like some popcorn?

No.

Have you seen Dave around?

He's around somewhere.

Are you okay?

Yeah, don't worry about it.

Hey I found a cool smiley face
thing for your collection.

Oh wow, thanks.

Tom, I can't do this anymore.

(record scratching)

Why are you getting
back together with Paul?

Jane, have you met Tom?

Dave just hired him a couple days ago.

This is Jane our innocent high schooler.

Yeah I've seen him around.

Yeah I got the job here through Matt.

So how’d it go with Steve?

Steve Preston?

I know him.

Have you guys seen Dave around?

Yeah he’s in there.

(rock and roll music)

So that's Jane, urban bitch from bell?

Oh you've been talking to Matt?

Hey Jane.

No, now please just go away.

So, bow was your date?

What the fuck is wrong with you people?

I mean don't you have anything
better to do with your time

than think about whether
I'm going on a date or not?

I mean I know that it just made your night

that everybody's best
friend and I went out.

But it's not a big deal so
leave me the fuck alone.

Listen, everybody at the
theater gets gossiped about.

You're the funnest person to gossip about

because you're such a fuckup.

Even Dave bad a bet on when you were

finally gonna go out on a date.

I have gone out on plenty of dates.

Yeah, like when?

I don't know why I have
to sit here and listen

to some high school
dropout who bas a negative

double digit IQ who can't even bold a job

who lives at the theater.

Can't even bold it
up as far as I recall.

Yeah.

Dave.

Oh bon, it's okay.

Don't even worry about that guy.

I even made a bet.

I won 50 bucks off your
ass when that stupid girl

broke up with you because
you're an alcoholic.

You guys bad bets on that?

I'll tell you about that later dude.

He knew I was a virgin.

Dave be bad a blanket
and huge fucking pliers

stashed in the backseat of his motorcycle.

I mean I should have known right there.

Yeah.

It just seems like no matter what I do

I can't get it right.

Anyway I can't believe be used that line.

Let me show you bow special sex can be.

I think I've used that line myself.

Oh great that makes
me feel so much better.

On guys or girls?

Guys.

But my first time.

Remember when we saw the
Lost Boys the other night?

Yeah.

He looked just like Jason Patric.

Except be was really popular.

He went out with all the girls and stuff.

But I always thought be
was flirting with me.

I was so confused.

One day he had football
practice, I had detention.

We ended up spending the
whole night together.

I watched him get drunk in the

laundry room of our apartment building.

The whole time I'm thinking
is be coming on to me?

I didn't think it could be.

And then be grabbed me, and be kissed me.

And I knew it was gonna happen.

I mean

you remember the butter scene
in Last Tango in Paris?

I'm thinking I don't know
if I'm ready for this.

I can't handle it.

But the freaky thing is though,

be wanted me to fuck him.

Wow.

So was that losing your virginity?

Well it was my first time.

I thought about it every
day for three weeks.

And be wouldn't ever talk to me.

How did you get over it?

I saw Sal Mineo in
Rebel Without a Cause.

I just got the feeling that I couldn't be

the only person that's
ever gone through this.

After that I wanted to see
every movie ever made, still do.

That's what I used to think about you.

You used to come in here to
see everything we ever showed.

Yeah.

I was so intimidated by all
of you when I first came here.

But I just knew that I would
end up working here somehow.

In school everybody just threw things

at me in the ball when I walked by.

I thought I would escape
that working here but it just

seems like here I'm a freak
because I'm too normal.

Will somebody please get me
some fucking ice over here?

Can't you see the man's hurt?

[Dave] what happened?

Well Grace just broke up with Tom

tonight to go back with Paul.

But Paul came by, saw
Grace and Tom talking.

And you know bow Tom was seeing Grace

that week that they were broken up?

Well Paul flips out and
beats the shit out of Tom.

Grace didn't you break up with Paul?

After tonight yes.

[Matt] I went out with Grace.

And Paul beat the shit out of me too Tom.

Here man I'll get you a beer.

(rock and roll music)

I am never dating.

Alright man.

Hey Tom.

Hey Dave.

Hey man, you're not gonna fire me are you?

Okay so put this stuff in here right.

And then you wait, and then after a while

you turn this thing on here right.

And then you wait for the thing to steam.

And then once it steams
a little bit you like

put some salt in there and you
like rake it back and forth.

But before you do that...

You gonna let her train Tom in?

He'll be more a fuckup than she is.

Shut the fuck up Matt.

You shut up, you Jewish troll.

Fucking sitting on your ass
all day talking on the phone.

Go back to the suburbs.

Yeah, it didn't seem
like you were having

such a hard time with
the suburbs yesterday

when you were trying
to fuck that mall girl.

But I beard you didn't
have such a hard time

after all 'cause you were too drunk.

You are gonna die.

(yelling and squealing)

I'll kill you.

(yelling and squealing)
(popcorn popping)

Just make sure they clean it up.

Matt get off me, fucking get of me.

Do you want to keep it down a bit?

We're trying to watch the movie.

Fuck you.

Stop it, stop it.

Fuck you.

Stop, stop it.

Hold on a second man.

Go clean up this mess.

You clean it up.

Hey Steve.

Hey what’s up man?

How you doing man,
good to see you again.

Yeah you know I beard about you guys.

I guess that didn't go so well bub?

Yeah it was kind of lame.

You know we were over in the cemetery and

you know I'm totally ready to go.

And then she tells me
she's a fucking virgin.

So I calmed her down, just
like it's cool, it's cool.

And then just when she's about to cum

she starts screaming and crying,
just totally freaking out.

Right Steve, I'm sure you were
just about to make her cum.

What’s up dude?

What are you jealous got
tagged her before you?

Get your pathetic ass
out of my fucking face.

Whatever dude.

Hey, what’s up Tom?

Hey man.

I bate everyone.

You would never treat a
girl that way would you?

Actually my first time
was kind of reverse.

I was really in love with this girl.

We were at this party.

She was way too drunk.

Were you?

No, no I've always been straight edge.

Even cigarettes?

No, just the occasional cigar.

We were running around, we
ended up in this parking garage

between this Cadillac
Seville on this VW Bug.

It was over before I
even knew what happened.

I looked down and somehow
my watch is busted.

Jane I'm really sorry about what happened.

Me and Steve aren't even really friends,

just knew each other through skating.

Really?

That's so weird.

I wish be was more like you.

[Steve] Hey Jane can I talk to you?

I have to go in.

[Jane] Okay Ryan.

Thanks for the bendy doll.

Yeah.

It's really cool.

I'm sorry it's not really from the 70's.

[Steve] So.

What do you want?

I feel bad about what
happened the other night.

I want to try to make it
up to you or something.

How, going on another
date but not fucking?

Yeah I mean, if we fucked it would be

better than last time that's for sure.

I think just about anything

would be better than last time.

Steve,

why do you like me?

I mean what do you think of me?

I mean really like why do
you want to go out with me?

I don't want anything
serious or anything.

I just, you know.

I wasn't asking you to walk off

into the sunset with me or anything.

Nobody's gonna eat that
much popcorn in a week.

God this is your fault,
you stupid suburban fuck.

Hey Matt, you could
ease up on her you know.

What’s your problem?

She’s a spoiled suburban loser.

She comes in here taking
jobs away from city kids

so she can go back to the
suburbs and tell her friends

bow cool she is by working in the city.

And she bas nothing to do
with you blowing Steve off?

Fuck you.

Start eating some of
this popcorn goddamnit.

Hey this isn't diet soda.

Is that real butter or is
it some fake liquid stuff?

All I got's pennies.

I counted them all up, I'm sure it's $6.

You know this is really important

'cause I don't eat sugar.

I'm from the Traditional
Values Committee.

Can we have our money
back, just fuck this.

(acoustic piano music)
(heavy panting)

What are those?

I don't know, relax Jane.

I was just asking.

It's Valium, want some?

So what’s the story with Jane?

She’s kind of weird.

Well I guess you're
the expert on weird bub?

I mean she's cool,
she's smart and all but

she's not a real girl, she's not like,

she's not like Grace you know.

I would not call Grace real.

What do you think of Ryan?

He's a cutie.

Would you go out with him?

No, it'd be kind of like
dating my little brother.

What about Tom?

What about Tom?

Well would you go out with him again?

I don't know, I kind of doubt it.

Why?

Because he’s so nice.

I think it would be better
if we just stayed friends.

Yeah I know what you mean.

I just don't wanna have
anything to do with

the whole thing anymore, I bate sex.

Yeah I felt that way for a long time.

When I was 15

a shithead got me really drunk
and I ended up passing out.

And when I woke up be was

bumping me, fucking me.

He raped me.

So I ended up losing my virginity

a month later with my friend Scott.

It kind of sucked we were really wasted.

How could you lose your virginity?

It doesn't count.

It only counts if you say yes.

It gets better.

Goodnight.

- Goodnight.
- Yeah goodnight man.

See you later.

Bye.

You want me to walk you to your car?

Why?

I don't know, don't you get nervous

walking around at night?

Here, no.

You're a tough girl, bub?

I'm not tough.

Hey, can I ask you something?

Depends on what it is.

Well, what did Steve
do that was so terrible?

He was dishonest with me.

What and that's a crime?

Yes, be doesn't have the balls to

be straight about what be wants I mean.

I mean if be told me be just wanted

to have sex with me I might
have been okay with that.

I mean I was curious, I was curious

what all the hype was all
about, what sex was like.

I wouldn't have wanted more if you hadn’t

pretended that's what be wanted.

Yeah but Jane you know
that would have been honest.

Oh why, what’s so
secret about the male ego

that you can't show any
emotion about anything?

Did all those beer commercials
really fuck you up that much?

(Laughing)

What?

Nothing.

What was your first time like?

What are you talking about?

Come on.

I don't know, I was about 15
you know and I was with this

slightly older catholic
school bad girl you know.

Fantasy time.

Well things get underway
and taking their course.

The moment of consummation
arrives you know.

And I've already spent my
load as the saying goes.

I felt like a real dolt you know.

I can't believe I just told you that.

My car's over there.

I'm glad you told me.

It's nice to know it's
not easy for guys either.

Want a ride lover boy?

No, I think I'll walk
home and take a cold shower.

Well see ya.

Alright.

Hey you want some popcorn?

[Jane] Grace, look up at me.

How does it feel to be
the citizen of a country

that bas total equal rights for women?

Will you get that fucking
thing out of my face?

Hey Jane, put the camera on me.

You know,

it sucks being in a country
where women have equal rights.

Because they're all bigger than us.

And they strap us down all the time.

And the beat us and they
whip us when we don't behave.

And those straps, they can really hurt.

Fuck you, Matt.

What?

Come on, come on.

Alright, alright I'll film you.

Are you on?

[Matt] Yeah.

I, Jane am total ruler of
this fabulous country, Zamboni.

We are a country that respects and values

women and their thoughts and input.

We have equal wages for men and women

except when women do a
better job, which is often.

We love our children and we respect them,

and when they tell us things we...

[Matt] Jane we respect you too.

[Jane] Here, this is our Chief of Staff.

[Matt] Ryan, king of the geeks.

[Jane] Go.

I am the Cardinal from Zamboni.

We treat all the environment
with total respect.

Styrofoam is out, as are all CFCs.

We love our friends the animals

and we treat them with total respect.

There's no judging in Zamboni.

Cool.

[Tom] Hey Matt, are we
going drinking tonight?

Hey Tom you want to be
interviewed for my class project?

(rock and roll music)

Did you see the body on that girl

who came in during the last rush?

She wanted me too.

(rock and roll music)

Hey were you saying something?

Yeah I was saying something.

That total fox that came
in during the last rush.

You know you were hitting
on her as hard as I was.

Oh yeah man, and she
slipped me a phone number

right past her date and everything.

Fuck you.

It's true man, 100o/o, check this out.

Holy shit man.

You gonna call her?

Oh fuck no.

What?

Give it to me then man.

What the bell's the matter with you?

(chattering coming from TV)

I bate that movie.

A light hearted tale of
a spunky young girl my ass.

People don't act that way.

She gets date raped, they
call that Iight hearted?

Who makes this shit?

Men.

[Jane] Hey Dave?

Yeah.

What do you think of Ryan?

Could a guy be more adorable?

I know.

I used to think be was
kind of a nerd but well

do you think you could maybe
schedule us together more?

Mary Jane, I thought you didn't

wanna have anything to do with men.

Okay.

Really?

Sure.

Yes.

Hey, I want to ask
you something alright.

I want a straight up answer,
not the usual bullshit okay.

What do you think about Jane?

Oh my God.

You're worse than a faggot man.

You've lost your fucking mind.

That's what you really think?

I fucking can't stand the
bitch, she's a dough ball.

You don't like her at all, not one bit?

Not at all, not one bit.

Oh my God I don't believe we're
fucking talking about this.

Hey man, I just thought of something.

Mud Honey's playing at Nye's tonight

and if we burry our asses
off this fucking stage

and get out that door we
can catch the last set.

Fuck yeah man let's go.

Well don't forget this.

(rock and roll music)

[Mother] I don't want to go.

[Father] Why do you always do this shit?

[Woman] I'm not, I
just don't like the fact

that we leave Jane alone so
often, I'm sick of traveling.

Do we have to go on every
business trip that comes up?

[Father] Now that we're
finally making enough

money that we can enjoy
ourselves you have to go off.

You always have to
complain about something.

[Mother] I want to save enough money

so we can send Jane to college.

So she can have all the
opportunities that I never bad.

[Father] Oh yeah, now you want money

for Jane to go to college.

Can we also talk about
not being a bastard?

She’s ready to throw away everything

for one of the best
schools in the country.

And you know why?

That fucked up job with her banging around

with those weirdos and drug addicts.

It was your idea to let her

take that job in the first place.

[Mother] Me, me?

You're the one who promised
if she made the honor roll

she could do whatever she wanted.

[Father] Oh yeah and what does she want?

To make something of her herself,

or to end up like those fucking losers?

[Mother] The thing that
I don't understand is why

she doesn't go away just to
get the bell away from you.

We're all going to camp,
it's going to be totally nice.

Yeah we're staying at a hotel room...

[Mr. Bullock] Okay class, Jane's gonna

present the project for group one.

So here it is.

Jane I'm sorry I
couldn't come over and help

but I bad a meeting for the
prom planning committee.

Yeah, I bad hockey practice.

So like, what’d you do?

I interviewed people at my work.

Okay, Zamboni to me is a country where

the government supports
the artists and stuff.

Like if you want to be in a
band you can totally do it.

And they'd be like...

[Boy] Man what is that?

And it pays really well.

[Girl] Is that, what
is that in her nose?

And all the beer you can
drink is free all the time.

Wait can I say that or are
you gonna get in trouble?

[Jane] Oh they're just a bunch

of losers anyway don't worry about it.

I don't think you can say that.

[Jane] Well I'm just
gonna edit this stuff out.

[Girl] Let's talk about losers Jane.

Hey Grace come here.

Tell them what you like
about living in Zamboni.

[Jane] I asked here she won't do it.

So Grace, tell us about what

you like about living in Zamboni.

[Boy] This is so weird.

Zamboni, the country
where Jane is President

and there's equal rights and stuff.

Ob, okay yeah it's cool.

You can write sappy poetry and
nobody gives you shit for it.

And boys see women as people and...

[Girl] Loser.

If you don't like them

in a romantic way they don't get upset.

Right there are no asshole
boyfriends in Zamboni.

Yeah because all the
assholes are expelled

from the country and boys who cheat on

their girlfriends with
strippers are fed to the lions.

And castrated.

[Girl] Jane.

Skinhead, skinheads are
made slaves to all us women.

[Girl] Whatever.

They have to carry
all the band equipment

on all the tours every place.

Yeah and they have
to bring us chocolate.

Where do you work?

I didn't have a chance to edit it.

[Mr. Bullock] Jane I think
we've seen enough, turn it off.

Yes Mr. Bullock.

(all talking at once)

[Ryan] Tickets will be $6 please.

- $6, you gotta be kidding!
- $6 for one lousy film?

You gotta be kidding?

How much is your goddamn popcorn?

Jane will you get Tom and
Matt from the basement please?

Sure Ryan.

No no no forget it.

We're not pay $6 for his lousy film.

Excuse me but I wanted
extra butter on this popcorn.

There really isn't that
much butter on it at all.

Okay let me take care of it for you.

No what I want to know first is why

this happens every time I come in here.

I mean are you people
all retarded or what?

Fuck you asshole.

It's like school.

They want you to learn all this fucking

shit that you're not gonna use.

It's a lot of crap.

Yeah I'm not gonna
need all that math dude.

What are you gonna need it for?

You just need to know bow to add,

subtract, divide, and multiply.

[Jane] Hey guys can
you get back upstairs?

It's only like the busiest
movie with that 3D porn thing.

Listen don't worry about it Jane.

You can come down after the next shift.

We still got half a bottle left.

Forget it, I have homework to do.

Oh Christ Jane, all you do is homework.

[Jane] I have finals.

I have finals.

We'll be back in about half an bour.

Jane don't you ever go out?

Tom, I told you.

Yeah but school’s almost over.

You've been accepted to college.

You've been on the honor roll since birth.

You ought to relax a little bit.

Hey you got off at 8:30 right?

Yeah.

Yeah well so do I,
and at g:30 I'm gonna do

a quick change and I'm gonna go

to this party over on Lincoln and Third.

You wanna go with me?

Ab no.

Oh it'll be fun, we'll get loaded.

You're already loaded.

Yeah you know but by the time

the party starts I'll have sobered up.

(rock and roll music)

[Customer] Can I get something?

[Customer] Excuse me, the
movie's already starting.

(all talking at once)

(rock and roll music)

(all talking at once)

There's a man sitting next to me

jerking off in the theater.

There's something wrong in
the left channel of the stereo.

The bass is just really terrible,
it just keeps cutting out.

I just paid $6, actually
$12 for my girlfriend and I

to come in here and see this movie.

We're getting pelted in the back the bead.

You realize the American
family is in a great deal

of trouble and we're trying
to help in this community.

So why you drag your minimum wage butt

back there and babysit these kids

so I don't have to deal with them alright.

[Ericka] Hey, mind
if I join you up here?

Oh no, not at all.

I am so tired, fuck that
last rush was a bitch.

God and the way that
lady was complaining about

the cost of her ticket, it's like why she

even fucking come to the movies you know?

And did you see Ryan?

I thought be was gonna burst
a blood vessel, it's like.

And Ryan never gets mad about anything.

I know, he’s so excellent.

He's almost like Jesus you know I mean

he’s so pure and be doesn't
drink, be doesn't smoke.

He doesn't fuck.

Yeah why is that?

Well I beard be bad some
girlfriend once from New York,

or she moved to New York
and then you wrote her

all these love letters and she didn't

write him back like not even once.

I think be was really bummed.

I bet that's the girl
be lost his virginity to.

What, I thought be was a virgin?

How do you know he’s not?

Well you know since this Steve thing

everybody's told me their first time.

They have?

Well you know.

Found out anything good?

No, but you know bow
in that movie Reckless

with Daryl Hannah and Aidan Quinn

they have sex for the first
time in that boiler room

and it's really beautifully lit

and fun, and exciting,
and dangerous, and weird?

It's like when you actually do it

you're just in a boiler room.

It's really dirty, and wet...

And stinky, and sweaty.

Yeah.

And Aidan Quinn turns out
to be kind of an asshole.

Yeah but you know I've
never met a girl who like

bad fun the first time she bad sex.

Really?

Well yeah I mean how can it be fun?

It's like you're totally hurting.

You're like gritting
your teeth just thinking

God you know when is this gonna be over.

I mean guys don't have
to think about pain,

they're just thinking about cumming.

I mean a girl's not gonna
lay there in pain and think

oh God am I gonna have an orgasm?

That's like that comes later
after the pain goes away.

Well bow long does that take?

Oh later on you know when you learn to

flip the guy over so you can get on top.

You get more clit stimulation
that way you know.

And especially if you grind really hard.

Now that's when it gets really fun.

More what stimulation?

Clit, the clitoris.

You know what the clitoris is right?

Well yeah I mean, I mean
in sex ed they told us

it was above the labia majoria, whatever.

I mean yeah I know what it
is, and I know what it is.

Well the clit's like a little button

at the top of where your vagina lips meet,

and it's really ultra sensitive.

A button?

Well kind of, some are
innies and some are outies.

What you should do really
you should go home

and get a mirror and check yours out.

Find it, touch it, play with it.

You know if you masturbate
you find out what you like.

And then when you're with a guy it's

so much easier for you to cum.

You masturbate?

Fuck yeah.

Really, like I'm not
a loser if I masturbate?

God Jane, you're a loser
if you don't, I mean...

Really?

You're missing out on
the big stress reliever.

God I remember the
first time I jacked off.

It was like in the morning and
then I walked around all day.

And I felt like everyone
knew I bad masturbated.

You know it's even the
best when you know someone

really well and you can
tell them what you like,

they can tell you what they like.

'Cause you know everybody's different and

that way it's a better
experience for both of you.

[Jane] What was the first
time you bad sex like?

Oh God it was awful.

We were in his basement, in his rec room.

And I remember his cat was watching.

Like it totally fucking hurt and

he didn't seem to notice that it hurt me.

It was pretty obvious all
be wanted to do was get off,

the whole two minutes that
it took him to get off.

I don't know, I really liked him though.

When we got done you know
we're just laying there and

be just kind of looked into my eyes

and got all kind of weird
and romantic and be said...

Olive juice.

What’s that supposed to be?

I love you, you know it looks like

you're saying I love you.

That's so weird.

It was so tacky.

I mean I bad been devirginized
by this guy you know.

I felt like I gave
something of myself to him.

And then be did that and what a dick.

Fucking wanted to kill him.

Yeah my first time was pretty awful.

But it does get better, it really does.

Maybe I'll just masturbate
for the rest of my life.

Hey your band is your best friend.

Always with you, you
don't have to worry about

wearing a rubber, and you
don't have to wake up next

to somebody and wonder
who the fuck they are

and have nothing to say to them.

(acoustic piano music)

You know Molly I thought
you were positively swell

the way you handled my friends tonight.

What do you mean by that?

No please, don't get me wrong.

What are you saying?

But Molly, Molly.

Molly I don't care what
anybody else thinks.

I want you to be my girl.

I love you Molly.

(acoustic piano music)

This isn't gonna be one of those

throw up punk rock parties is it Tom?

No.

(punk rock music)

Hey Jane, bow you been?

Hey, bow's it going?

Alright.

Hey Jane.

Allison.

You have to come with me now.

Okay, like I'll see you later.

Alright.

Hey Tom.

Hey Allison, what’s going on?

Nothing, come on Jane.

(punk rock music)

You came here with Tom O'Keefe?

Yeah why?

He is so rad.

He's like almost a man you know.

He bangs out with that ultra cool crowd.

I don't know, I think you have
the hottest date here Jane.

Well it's not a date.

You know my friend Rhonda
was just telling me about

the time her sister was in the hospital.

She bad that like like puffy thing

that kind of split open and
all this puss was everywhere.

Yeah, and Tom was her friend and totally

visited her all the time in the hospital.

The night before she
got out of the hospital

be went to all the neighbors yards,

took all the most beautiful flowers out

and planted them outside her
window before she got home.

Is that not so sweet?

(rock and roll music)

Hey, is my sister up there?

On no she starts early tomorrow.

Hey Ericka.

Fuck off Tom, I mean I can't believe

you're even talking to me right now.

I mean what’s it been a week
now you've been avoiding me?

Do you want to go
outside and talk about it?

Oh do you think you can handle it?

I mean you might get fucking
cooties or something.

Ericka you know listen.

This whole thing's really
knocked me for a loop you know.

It's gonna take me some
time to figure it all out.

You know.

(punk rock music)

I gotta go, I gotta find someone.

Alright.

Look Tom, can we just
keep this between us?

Yeah of course, of course.

Ericka.

Jane I'm lost.

Ericka I love you man.

I love you too.

Hey I gotta go okay.

There you are.

Oh hey there little
miss social butterfly.

Hi.

Hi.

Ow.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Howdy.

Howdy.

Hey.

Hey.

(Laughing)

You wanna go?

I guess I should take you home.

[Boy] Sorry man, I didn't
know that was your mom's car.

Are you okay, can you drive?

No, yeah I'm fine.

Oh then I guess you should take me home.

Oh bey, what about your station wagon?

Ob, I'll pick it up tomorrow.

Your parents won't get mad?

No, they're away.

(rock and roll music)

Hey nice bouse.

Thanks.

Tom I bad a really nice time.

I'm glad you made me go out.

I bad a really nice time too.

Hey Jane.

What?

Nothing.

Hey, are you working tomorrow?

No thank God but I have
school in three bours.

I'll see you later.

Okay, I'll see you.

(door opens and closes)

(acoustic guitar music)

Hey so when are you gonna get up

the nerve to buy a vibrator?

Oh I don't know.

You say that now.

God you know I wonder what
it would be like with Ryan.

Or Tom.

Can you imagine what would
it be like with Matt?

[Ericka] You don't want to know.

What?

You didn't.

Did you and Matt like?

He was my first.

No way.

Yeah.

He was mister olive juice?

God you know my band even bad

a song about it, The Lame Fuck.

♪ Those were the worst
two minutes of my life ♪

Lame fuck.

- Hey Dave.
- Hey Dave.

Hey guys.

Don't you think you should be

getting ready for the next show?

We were just doing that.

I'm sure you were.

How many times have I told
you not to sit on the counter?

Where's Tom and Matt?

Matt is running an errand and Tom

would be downstairs getting high?

I'll be downstairs.

Hey I'm gonna go get some smokes okay.

I'll be right back.

Okay.

Don't smile so much or everybody

might know what you been up to.

(popcorn popping)

Shit.

Yes.

Fuck.

Hey.

Throw it to me.

Oh what?

- Try it again.
- Idiot.

Just throw it.

Fuckbead.

Just throw the damned popcorn.

Moron.

Sorry, asshole.

Oh good.

This could be like a
whole new thing for you.

Fucking idiot, idiot.

Throw it.

Ryan, wait up.

Hey, I thought you like bad the day off.

I do I just come to see the film.

Oh cool.

Hey Matt.

Yeah you're early.

Yeah I know, but the film’s
about to let out anyway.

Yeah, oh wait I have something for you.

Here look.

Wow, that's cool.

[Jane] I think it's
actually from the 70's.

- Thanks.
- Yeah.

- See ya.
- Bye.

What a dork.

[Jane] He's not.

What do girls see in him?

Every girl I know bas a crush
on him and be is such a wuss.

I don't have a crush on him.

(acoustic guitar music)

(gasps)

Ryan.

Hey Jane.

What’s up?

The movie ended.

What did you come up here for?

Nobody comes up here.

I don't know I'm feeling
kind of restless right now.

I just like to come up
here and think sometimes.

What are you thinking about?

I just wish I was more
cool and exciting like Matt.

Matt?

What do you want to be like him for?

He's a fucking loser.

He's so suave.

He knows what be wants to do.

He goes out with whoever be wants to.

He does whatever be feels like doing.

You're talking about
a guy whose whole life

is about drinking, picking up girls,

and getting the shit kicked out of him.

I don't know, I'm 22 years old and

I just feel like I'm missing out.

Then move out of the Midwest.

Yeah.

So Grace what’s up with you and Paul?

What do you mean?

Well are you guys still together?

No.

So why don't you go
out with Tom again then?

Ericka it's over.

Why don't we just leave it at that okay.

Come on be still likes you I can tell.

He's cute, he’s funny, he’s nice.

Why don't you go out with him then?

I can't go out with Tom,
I've known him forever.

I know his whole family.

And besides if you're
not going out with Paul...

Ericka stop.

God what’s up with you?

If I tell you guys something

you have to swear and not tell anyone.

[Jane] I swear.

[Ericka] Yeah me too.

No.

Oh come on you can't do that.

Grace, what’s wrong?

I'm pregnant, I don't know
what the fuck I'm gonna do.

You guys are the first ones I've told.

How long have you known?

About a month.

How far along are you?

Five months.

- Five months?
- Five months?

How could you not have known?

I don't know.

My cycle's always been
kind of wacky, you know.

What?

She’s a partier.

If you do a lot of drugs
sometimes you miss your period.

You can't even get an
abortion now can you?

Thank you for reminding me of that.

Are you gonna keep it?

I don't know.

I'm looking at this
adoption agency in Boston.

I'll be in Boston.

I want to get out of
this damn town anyway.

You been seeing a doctor I hope,

and getting vitamins
and everything you need.

You stopped drinking?

Yes.

Oh good.

I'm going to quit those things.

You've been really cool.

God bow could you have known

for a month and not told anyone?

It seems like everybody I know

around here is an ex-boyfriend.

(people all talking at once)

Ericka I feel like a rhinoceros.

Why?

These pants are too loose.

Oh you cannot even tell.

You lie so bad.

It's just because you ate
all that popcorn earlier.

Sure, sure I just want
you to look at this.

Don't.

You can't tell, you cannot.

Do you know they know?

They do don't they?

Hey.

Wow you guys look great.

Hey Dave, give up on men?

I wouldn't mind finding
somebody as fine as Jane.

We just came from my
honors banquet at school.

Why didn't your parents take you?

Oh my parents, you
know they're always away.

So Dave took me.

Everyone was like, "that's your dad?".

Well Jane why don't you come with me

downstairs and we'll
have a celebratory drink.

Okay.

So bow were the suburbs Dave?

Weird.

Every morning I pray to
Jesus to make our school

number one, number one in athletics,

and in academic excellence.

I am very proud to be
this year's valedictorian.

Being a Christian athlete
bas helped me focus

my faith and understand
the trials I am to face

not only in this life
but in the hereafter.

I know that g0o/o of
our honor students, g0o/o

belong to their church groups and...

(audience applauding)

That really makes me feel good.

My only regret for the students is that

they cannot fully express their faith

in the Lord in the school system,

that our government keeps good Christians

from taking full advantage
of every possible resource.

So Jane's a geek in school bub?

Yeah well I want to be a geek

in a school full of
Stepford children myself.

What’s your problem Matt?

I mean you dated cheerleaders
from her school before.

You know she's not like
those shallow bimbos.

She’s a spoiled bitch.

Matt, shut the fuck up.

What?

Oh you're just so deprived aren't you?

What have you ever done that's so great?

Oh yeah, you're the
greatest drunk in town?

Remember when you
were sober for two years

and people actually liked you?

I'm pregnant Matt.

I used to think about
bow great it would be

having uncle Matt tell my kid about

the good old days with his mom and dad.

But you know I don't fucking think so

because I don't want my kid around

such a fucking pathetic
excuse for a human being.

[Dave] Grace you're pregnant?

Yes, please don't fire me right now.

I really need this job.

Hell girl I'm not gonna fire you,

as long as you can fit behind the counter.

Besides, I won 20 bucks
off your sorry ass.

Pay up Matt.

You knew?

How'd you know?

[Dave] Honey, I bad three sisters.

Why didn't you say anything?

[Dave] I figured when it
was time you'd let us know.

Why do you think be kept
getting all the easy shifts?

Are you gonna keep the baby?

Well Paul and I bad a really long talk

and I think we're gonna
try and make it work.

I'm gonna have this baby.

Are you doing it for yourself

or are you doing it for your parents?

For myself.

I mean

you could be anything right?

So why waste four years of
your life going to college?

Because I want to make
something of myself.

I don't want to end up...

What? What here, like me?

That's not what I meant.

Yeah I know.

Look all I'm trying to say is that

intelligence isn't
measured by whether or not

you graduate a Merit Scholar or not.

Look what it did for me.

You were a Merit Scholar?

Yeah I was a Merit Scholar.

How come you never told me that?

Well you never asked me that.

♪ Wrote you a sexy post card ♪

[Matt] Hey Tom, Jane, Grace is pregnant.

(all talking at once)

Pop for you.

Pop for you.

Beer for you.

- Thanks.
- I'm gonna be a mom.

Hey, who’s upstairs?

Ryan doesn't drink so be
said he’d watch the lobby.

(upbeat music) (guns firing)

I can't believe Dave knew,
that fucker I can't believe it.

I just feel so much better now that

this albatross is off my neck.

Good.

Hey you want a ride home?

Okay.

Okay, bye guys.

Bye.

- See ya.
- Bye.

Oh God are you gonna drag
him all the way home?

No we're just gonna go
around the corner to my bouse.

You guys need a place to crash?

That's okay.

Dave, if you try to fuck
me on your couch tonight

I'm gonna kill you.

That's not what you said the last time.

You guys lock up okay.

Yeah.

What now?

Yeah like there's anything
to do in this town after one.

Hey I know.

Let's go to Madison.

Wisconsin?

[Tom] We'd play music
on the streets and then

went out drinking all night
long with the money we made.

I'd love to do something,
I'd love to go to New Orleans.

Well you know we'll go next year.

Yeah right, I'll be in Boston.

Oh fuck college Jane, you know.

Just bang out with me.

We'll go to New Orleans in the spring.

And then summertime will roll around,

we'll get antsy and
drive out to San Francisco.

I would love that.

Well, come on Jane, don't go.

(big band music)

Pull over at this next exit up here.

(big band music)

(upbeat jazz music)

Tom.

I am.

I don't want to you know, fuck.

Okay.

Well I'm up for anything you are.

Really?

Anything?

Yeah.

Anything I want?

Wait, a little to the right.

Wait, move down a little
lower, right there.

Wait, can you go to the left a little?

Now up, a little up.

(moaning)

Oh right there.

Hey Jane.

What?

Have you ever tried 6g?

No.

Show me.

Yeah?

Okay.

Wait, let's just take turns okay.

Okay.

Oh God Jane (moaning) oh God.

Oh God Jane, bite it.

What?

Yeah bite it like a beef jerky.

Are you sure?

Yeah, yeah, I kinda like it.

Okay.

Oh Jane.

(moaning)

(both snoring)

Good morning.

So, I haven't really seen
you around in a while.

Yeah.

How was graduation?

Boring.

Good to be out though.

How have you been?

Okay.

[Dave] Hey there's Mary Jane.

Dave.

[Dave] How was your graduation?

Boring.

My English teacher asked about you though.

Me?

Yeah, be thought you were cute.

(Laughing)

Where's Matt?

I have to rub it in bis
face that I graduated.

Jane, Matt doesn't work here anymore.

Oh yeah right, what is be in jail?

What?

He was stealing?

[Dave] That little shit was
making more money than I was.

Fucking loser, be didn't even know

be was hitting on Ericka's
girlfriend last week.

What?

Jane you didn't know that Ericka was bi?

No, I bad no idea.

Does it freak you out?

Well yeah kind of, I
mean it's not like she

sits around listening
to Holly Near all day.

God you've seen those skinheads

that hangout at the clubs they play at.

I mean even in that scene I don't think

it's that cool to be a dyke.

I wouldn't be that loud about it.

How do you know so
much about what goes on?

I just feel like I'll never get it.

Oh God I'm old.

I mean when you've been around here

as long as I have you see everything.

I've fired them all.

Oh you're so jaded.

So it looks like you
have to hire someone new.

No, I don't think that's gonna happen.

I'm only gonna be here for another month.

What?

I never caught Matt stealing.

You know bow this company sends in people

anonymously to file
reports, check receipts.

The whole thing doesn't
make me look that good.

Shit.

No I think it's a good thing.

I'm looking into buying and renovating

that theater down the street.

I'm sick of babysitting shit.

Crazy Mary Jane, I'm gonna miss you.

[Jane] I'm gonna miss you too Dave.

I thought I smelled alcohol.

Ericka.

Remember when me and you went out?

You were a great fuck.

I'm leaving town man, you
might never see me again.

I wish.

Oh come on.

Let's go in the janitor's
closet like the old days.

Matt stop it.

What, what?

Like you're too cool for me now

that you've made it maximum rock and roll.

Just 'cause my band
bas its shit together

and yours doesn't isn't my fault.

Yeah right.

Like all those guys wanting to get

in your pants doesn't help record sales.

You know I never realized till now

bow much I don't like you.

And look what you pulled last week man,

getting busted stealing so
you get Dave in trouble.

Really cool, really smooth.

Right Ericka like you can
afford to tour all the time.

I wasn't so fucking drunk that
I messed up and got caught.

Now you've ruined it for everybody else.

You're just pissed because I'm not gonna

be here anymore for you to lust after.

Oh yeah that's it, right.

What are you fucking stupid?

Do you remember the
night I popped your cherry

and you were so scared I bad to

lay there and bold you all night long?

You think you are such a fucking stud.

But bas any girl told you yet

bow much you really suck in bed?

And remember Susie Johnson’s party

where that girl was giving
you bead and she threw up?

I'll bet you remember that don't you?

Get the fuck away from me.

You are a fucking pig. (Spitting)

Hey is that bottle of scotch

still stashed back here some place?

No you drank it with those guys

you were playing chess with last night.

Oh shit that's right.

Tom I need to talk to you.

I feel really weird.

Well what are you doing on Thursday?

Nothing.

You want to go to

check out a band at Nye's
or something and then get

a cup of coffee after the
show and, do all that?

That would be good.

Alright well,

I gotta go, Matt's waiting
for me out in the back and

we're gonna go drinking
before be leaves tomorrow.

What?

Yeah well I mean you know him.

He's got some girlfriend in Alabama and

her dad's gonna set him up
with a job or something.

He's not gonna come
in here and say goodbye?

Oh you know you wanted to.

He felt really weird about putting

Dave in such an awkward position.

You chicken shit.

Jane.

The whole time you've
worked here you've been

abusive, inconsiderate, stupid, and drunk.

And now you're telling
me you're gonna go off

to Alabama to Ieech off some
unlucky girl and you weren't

even gonna apologize
for being so mean to me?

I mean you are not gonna
say goodbye to Dave?

Jane you geek.

Look, maybe I'll see
you in Boston someday.

Yeah I hope not.

Hey listen do me a favor.

Say goodbye to Dave for me okay?

Hey, I'll see you later.

[Guy] Dude, have you seen Tom?

[Dude] What?

[Guy] I said have you seen Tom?

[Dave] No but he’ll be here soon.

He's bringing some chick from his work.

[Guy] What?

[Dude] I said he’s bringing
some chick from his work.

What do I look like, his travel agent?

Hey guys what’s up?

What?

What happened?

Jane there's been an accident.

Tom.

He was drunk and be drove the

wrong way down a one way street.

Dave's at the hospital right now and

it sounds really serious.

Ericka what do we do?

Let's get here into Dave's office.

Hey come on.

Don't call my parents.

I mean can I, can I stay with you?

[Ryan] Yeah that's fine.

Dave bow is be?

[Dave] He's not gonna make it.

What?

[Ryan] It's Tom.

He was in a car accident,
be didn't have a chance.

He died about an bour ago.

He drove the wrong way down...

My friend is dead.

We only slept together once.

That's the the real reason
Ericka, be was too nice.

I thought I didn't deserve
somebody as nice as Tom.

I just blew it, fucking blew it.

You know be was finally getting over

that stupid boy phase where all he’d do

is skateboard and drink with the boys.

And be was like writing,
and playing music again.

How'd you know that?

Remember when you asked me
why I don't go out with Tom?

[Grace] Yeah.

Well I been seeing his sister Laurie.

(Laughing)

No way.

Yeah I didn't want anyone

to know really because I was afraid.

Did be know?

He found out.

First be like totally freaked out

and be avoided me for like a week.

And then we talked and be
was really cool about it.

Fuck. (Glass breaking)

(furniture clattering)

(Iaugb crying)

You know I used to live in this town and

even though your past
is always in your face

and there's no chance of like change

or becoming anything different.

Everybody's always like the
same all the time you know.

And so I lived here five more...

[Jane] What’s it like?

I don't know it's kind of
like New Orleans you know.

You know a really festive environment.

[Jane] How do you make a living?

You don't have to, you just.

You know that's the great
thing about Zambuli.

[Jane] Zamboni, bello.

Zamboni.

[Dave] I can't believe you guys

fooled around in the backseat of his car.

It was great.

The first time I ever came with anybody.

So what were you guys
going to talk about tonight?

About us,

and where we stood.

Now he’s gone, there's no one to ask.

I feel totally alienated
from everyone who knew him.

They all knew him all their lives.

Who the fuck am I?

We fooled around in his car, so what?

I remember when I met him.

And I thought be was just like Matt.

Yeah.

I can't believe he’s dead.

I mean there were so
many times when be would

crash out here because be was
too wasted to find his car.

I feel responsible.

So are you still going on tour?

I don't know, I mean.

I thought about not going you know.

I told the band and everybody
like really freaked out.

The whole thing with Laurie is.

I don't want to leave right now.

She’s just spending like
every minute with her parents.

They don't know about us.

I don't know.

It might be good just to get away.

I'm gonna miss the funeral though.

You're not going?

Jane I don't know it would be weird.

I don't like funerals.

I don't know if I can
handle this funeral.

How you doing?

I really can't believe it you know.

I keep expecting him to walk
through the door any moment.

And then with the baby I've
been doing a lot of thinking.

The other night I was laying on my back

and baby kind of shifted to
one side so my stomach was flat

and there was a big huge bulge
out of the side of my hip.

And it scared me.

Paul just when be got the video camera

'cause be wanted to tape it
'cause be said it looks so cool.

I tried to tell him that our lives

are gonna change because of this.

He just told me to not bother talking

because be was gonna dub the video

with the sound track from Eraserbead.

I can't go.

I have to meet with the
bank about the new theater.

Is Matt going?

He can't afford it.

I think if be came back here

it would be too real.

Are you gonna go?

(organ music)

(woman screaming)

So you guys, this is the last time.

Can't believe it's over.

Dave you need help with that?

Sure.

I'll give you a call as soon as

I can figure out what’s going on.

It could be a couple of months
though before I can hire you.

It's alright no, I'll
volunteer if I have to.

Just give me a call.

Okay.

Goodbye (speaking in foreign language)

[Manager] And just where do you

think you're going young lady?

I'll be right back.

That was bold.

Oh what’s be gonna do fire me?

It's not like you've gotten it
together to hire anyone else.

Anyway he’s a dick, I don't care.

Well why’d you bother to stay?

Well it's only three more weeks

and I figured if Ryan can do it so can I.

Oh Mary Jane you are
throbbing and ready to go.

Shut up.

Hey do you think I should tell him?

I mean what if be likes?

I'm leaving so soon, what if be doesn't?

Girl get a grip.

What do you want to do?

I don't know.

Dave.

Yeah?

Do you think it's okay
that I still like Ryan

I mean after everything with Tom?

I'm just so confused.

After Tom I wanted to push all that away

but I still have those feelings.

I just feel like I'm going crazy.

You always like Ryan,
even before you and Tom.

Just because someone dies

doesn't mean that you have to die too.

[Ryan] I worked 13 bours straight

and you jipped me of my overtime pay.

[Manager] What are you talking about?

[Ryan] Look at these time sheets.

I can see where you changed the number.

[Manager] You calling me a liar?

[Ryan] This is bow you thank me?

After all I did for you when you first

got here you didn't
have your shit together.

[Manager] Now look here buddy.

[Ryan] This is bullshit, I quit.

[Manager] Okay leave, no problem.

[Ryan] Goddamn fucking.

[Manager] Well what do you want?

Hi I just want to say
I think it's really vile

that you passed Grace
up for that promotion

for that guy that's only been here a week.

[Manager] You think
I have time for this?

Get back to work.

You're an asshole.

I quit.

[Manager] You fucking cow.

Oh eat me fuckbead.

Hey Ryan wait up.

Hey.

I got the day off.

What a coincidence, so do I.

(upbeat music)

♪ When you said you loved me ♪

♪ My eyes lit up like a firefly ♪

♪ I know you know what you said ♪

♪ And that's enough to get me by ♪

♪ So I say ♪

♪ Would you be with me endlessly
in my dreams in my dreams ♪

♪ Be with me in my dreams ♪

♪ When I bear your lovely voice ♪

♪ When I listen on the telephone ♪

♪ You say you want to be with me ♪

♪ But now I have to be alone so I say ♪

♪ Would you be with me endlessly
in my dreams in my dreams ♪

♪ Be with me in my dreams ♪

(upbeat music)

♪ I've got a super crush ♪

♪ On you ♪

♪ That stars are scared to run away ♪

♪ I've got a super crush ♪

♪ On you ♪

(Iight hearted bouncy music)

Here we go Jane, two
Purplesaurus Rex Kool-Aids.

(Iight hearted bouncy music)

What are you thinking Jane?

Jane?

About you.

I was thinking about bow much I like you.

I like you too Jane.

We're pals.

No Ryan I mean I like you.

I've bad a big crush on
you for a long time now.

Jane I'm really flattered
but I consider us friends.

I don't want to lose that.

I just don't have
romantic feelings for you.

I think it took a lot of guts
for you to say what you said.

I could never be that honest with anyone.

I really respect you for that, I mean it.

When you leaving for school?

Three days.

You must be so excited
to get out of here.

I don't know.

For a while I was considering not going.

I mean you know right before Tom died

I was sort of starting to feel at home here

for the first time, ever probably.

But now I don't know.

Anyway I don't know
where I'm supposed to go.

So I'm going to Boston.

Jane you'll always have us here.

Yeah you're not gonna go
forget about us are you?

Hey we have to give you your present.

What?

(rock and roll music)

Oh my God.

You guys are the best.

Weirdos.

(church bells ringing)

[Bride] Remember when I bad
a crush on you way back when?

I never dreamed you'd
realize your mistake,

fall madly in love with me,
and that we'd be married.

[Bride] Remember bow we used
to fight like cats and dogs?

I'm so glad that we figured out that

underneath it all we're really
in love with each other.

And now we're getting married?

[Bride] Remember bow you were

in love with me and I blew you off?

Thank the Lord they revived you after your

near fatal accident and you found me

and expressed your undying
love and won me over.

And now you're marrying
me and agreeing to be

the father that my
child bas always needed.

(organ music)

What?

Yeah after I kicked that Paul guy out,

the state demanded that be pay

child support 'cause I'm on OA.

So be bad to take a blood test and

they figured out that the
blood types didn't match.

I just...

[Ericka] They only bad sex once.

[Jane] That's amazing.

Kind of cosmic you know,

kind of knowing that Tom's
still alive in a way.

Do Tom's parents know?

Well it took took a while for me

to work up the nerve to tell them.

But since I have they've
been really really cool.

Yeah they're gonna babysit next fall

when we go on tour so
Grace can come with us.

You're going on tour?

Well Jane I haven't
mellowed out that much.

[Jane] I should interview you guys

for my Zine, Olive Juice.

I should give you a copy
of our new album to review.

Would you do that?

[Jane] Yeah totally.

Yeah you know there's
even a live version

of Lame Fuck on that, a really old one.

You guys were so great
when I saw you in Boston.

That was a good show.

You know we played in
Colorado on that same trip

and ended up at that
Matt lives out there now.

No.

And his band opened for us.

[Jane] He must have loved that.

You know though be wrote
me this really cool letter

when be found out about Danny.

Sent me all these really
great pictures of Tom.

I've been wanting to give you one.

Wow.

Thanks Grace.

(baby babbling)

Here be is.

Dave.

Miss Mary Jane.

I see you've met my lover, Curt.

He's very cute.

Hey have you still got that fake ID?

Yeah.

Good because we're going out.

[Jane] It's great.

It's really good to see you Jane.

You haven't changed.

What?

[Steve] Hey what’s up Ryan?

Hey Steve.

[Jane] Hi Steve.

[Steve] Do I know you?

(gasps)

I'll see you later Ryan.

What a little shit. (Grunting)

Oh my God, oh my God that.

Jane don't.

You read books?

[Allison] No.

Yeah me neither.

[Allison] No I read
the comics sometimes.

Can I help you?

No actually I was just coming

to say bi to my friend, Allison.

[Allison] Jane.

[Jane] Hi.

How are you?

You look great.

Oh thanks.

Oh my God bow long are you in town for?

Oh just a couple weeks.

I have to know something.

I was just thinking the other day.

Are you writing for
that Zine, Olive Juice?

Yeah you've seen it?

Yeah totally.

This guy I once dated
once said that to me.

Olive juice.

Steve Jane, Jane Steve.

Hi Steve.

You two now each other?

Well.

I don't know you know.

It's kind of up for grabs
whether we know each other.

Steve is that guy that
I lost my virginity to.

Do you remember that article
I wrote about that horrible,

horrible thing that
happened in the cemetery?

Well I remember it
because it was like easily

the worst night of my whole life.

But Steve doesn't seem to remember it

because I don't know why.

But you know I remember it.

He you know just bas a
little bit of a problem.

Hi Steve.

How could you not remember you idiot?

Well.

(rock and roll music)

Jane what are you doing right now?

I am having coffee over there with Ryan.

Ryan?

Yeah.

Oh my God I love him.

[Jane] You want to
come bang out with us?

Yes totally.

Steve, fuck you.

Hey Ryan is it okay if Alison
comes with us to go bowling?

It's great, it'll be fun.

Ready to go?

Yeah let's go.

Pardon me ma'am I need
to ask you a question.

Is this a family picture?

Would it be safe to bring
young children here?

Is there any nudity?

Is there any graphic violence?

That's too bad.

Nudity we have a real problem with.

But graphic violence can
help build strong character

just like it does on television.

We are also working on
the school curriculum

to make sure that the spelling books

do not mention warlocks or witches.

We want to get rid of Halloween so that

our children are not exposed to anybody

dressed as a devil or a witch.

Listening to so much rock music or

watching movies with adultery
in them and lustful kissing.

If people aren't exposed to
this day after day after day,

until they think that lustful kissing

is acceptable, then
perhaps they will love,

well turn out a little more like we are.

And everybody will be happy.

If you're Jewish that's not
not, not too big a problem.

We've been able to cure many Jews

and homosexuals over the years.

My own daughter once
told me that she thought

she was a lesbian and we found
a private hospital for her.

And within a month or two
she was back to normal again.

Wouldn't you rather be
happy and worry free

and know that somebody up
there is taking care of you?

Maybe you'd like to come
to a meeting of ours

after you're off of work tonight

where we can talk more about
the coming reconstruction

and the return of Jesus
Christ where all the world

will be governed by Old Testament law.

And finally we can bring back executions

for witchcraft, and homosexuality,

and abortions, and also
for unruly children.

Red Dawn, now that's the film
that's got a fable to it.

It's got a moral tone and it's something

everybody could relate to.

The Communists invade
America and parachute

straight into the high
school and the people

with Ieadership qualities,
you know the quarterback

and the head boy, and
some of their girlfriends

they load up a pickup truck
with ammo and Cheerios

and they go into the mountains

and bold off Russian battalions
all through the film.

They finally are defeated
but they gave their life

not only for America, but for God as well.

And you know by the end the way the sun

shines on their monument
that they're in Heaven now.

And this is something
that that all kids could

look up to and be inspired by

instead of just banging out in malls,

or record stores, or something like that.

We intend to clean up this
community and you're either,

you're either on the bus
or you're off the bus.

We have sympathizers in
the police department too.

We've spotted satanic graffiti like that

so called peace sign on bridges.

And they're very concerned
there may be a cult here.

So I would suggest you
think carefully about

the material you're
showing in this theater

so that it doesn't encourage
this sort of thing.

And stop selling paint to children too.

[Man] That's enough.

[Woman] You're so weird.