Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX
2
00:00:07,924 --> 00:00:10,176
(grand orchestral fanfare
playing)
3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
4
00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:35,660
(gentle melody playing)
5
00:00:53,803 --> 00:00:56,097
* *
6
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,190
TIM:
Time is a funny thing.
7
00:01:05,231 --> 00:01:07,233
-When I was a kid...
-YOUNG TIM: One.
8
00:01:07,275 --> 00:01:08,943
-...the days lasted forever.
-Two.
9
00:01:08,985 --> 00:01:10,320
-Hide, hide, hide!
-Three.
10
00:01:10,362 --> 00:01:11,946
-TIM: But the years...
-Wait! Over here.
11
00:01:11,988 --> 00:01:13,281
-...well, they went by so fast.
-Four.
12
00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:15,158
-Five. Six.
-Tim, no peeking.
13
00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:16,493
TED SR.:
Yeah, no peeking.
14
00:01:16,534 --> 00:01:17,952
-TIM: Before you know it...
-Seven.
15
00:01:17,994 --> 00:01:19,329
-...you're all grown-up.
-Eight.
16
00:01:19,371 --> 00:01:21,289
-It even happened to me.
-Nine.
17
00:01:21,331 --> 00:01:23,291
Nine and a half. Ten!
18
00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:25,502
Ready or not, here I come.
(grunts)
19
00:01:25,543 --> 00:01:27,754
My name's Tim, and this...
20
00:01:27,796 --> 00:01:29,756
well, this isthe rest of my story.
21
00:01:29,798 --> 00:01:31,466
-(roars playfully)
-Run for your lives!
22
00:01:31,508 --> 00:01:33,134
(laughing):
No fair, Dad. You peeked.
23
00:01:33,176 --> 00:01:34,928
(laughter, squealing)
24
00:01:34,969 --> 00:01:37,097
-They call me a stay-at-homedad, which means...-Let's go!
25
00:01:37,138 --> 00:01:39,140
...I hardly getto stay at home.
26
00:01:39,182 --> 00:01:41,101
Buckle up, Templetons.
27
00:01:41,142 --> 00:01:42,727
Ready?
28
00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:44,437
-Set.
-Go!
29
00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:46,856
(engine roars, tires squeal)
30
00:01:46,898 --> 00:01:48,358
TIM:
Now, some might say
31
00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:50,610
I still havean overactive imagination,
32
00:01:50,652 --> 00:01:54,072
but being a dad isthe coolest job in the world.
33
00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:55,740
Bunch of cool jobs, really.
34
00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:57,367
(laughing)
35
00:01:57,409 --> 00:01:58,952
Sometimes I'ma race car driver.
36
00:01:58,993 --> 00:02:01,162
CAROL:
Whoo! Daddy-o Andretti!
37
00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:02,664
TABITHA:
Yay, Templetons!
38
00:02:02,706 --> 00:02:04,290
TIM (Southern accent):
Well, and then sometimes
39
00:02:04,332 --> 00:02:05,875
I'm the best darn cookin the county
40
00:02:05,917 --> 00:02:07,168
and I deal out every meal.
41
00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:09,421
-Come on, Pa, hit me.
-(burps)
42
00:02:09,462 --> 00:02:11,297
-(chuckles) Tina.
-(Tina laughs)
43
00:02:11,339 --> 00:02:13,550
Whew, doggie!
And the house wins again.
44
00:02:13,591 --> 00:02:15,301
-(thunder crashes)
-CAROL: Yay! -TABITHA: Woo-hoo!
45
00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:17,929
TIM (spooky voice): Or asurgeon, if need be. (chuckles)
46
00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:19,931
-Spork.
-Spork.
47
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,808
-Spatula.
-Spatula.
48
00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:25,395
Give my creature life!
49
00:02:25,437 --> 00:02:28,189
-(growling)
-(Carol and Tabitha gasp)
50
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:29,691
She's alive!
51
00:02:29,733 --> 00:02:31,985
TIM: We have our ups,and we have our downs.
52
00:02:32,027 --> 00:02:33,361
-(whimpers)
-No, no, no. Look. Look.
53
00:02:33,403 --> 00:02:34,654
-Lamb Lamb's okay. See?
-Yay!
54
00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:36,489
TIM:
But we always stick together.
55
00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:38,658
-My wife, Carol.
-It's a miracle!
56
00:02:38,700 --> 00:02:40,618
TIM: She's thebreadwinner of the family.
57
00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:42,537
-(applause) -Thank you.
You know what they say:
58
00:02:42,579 --> 00:02:44,247
-"It's all about the dough."
-(laughter)
59
00:02:44,289 --> 00:02:46,166
And I couldn't have done it
without my husband.
60
00:02:46,207 --> 00:02:47,751
He really rose to the occasion.
61
00:02:47,792 --> 00:02:50,003
-It's the yeast I can do.
-(cheering) -Yeah, Mama!
62
00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:52,213
TIM:
She brings home the bacon, too,
63
00:02:52,255 --> 00:02:54,424
while I keep an eyeon our new baby, Tina.
64
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:56,426
(chuckles):But sometimes, feels like
65
00:02:56,468 --> 00:02:58,386
she's keeping an eye on me.
66
00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:00,013
-And Tabitha...
-Thank you!
67
00:03:00,055 --> 00:03:02,182
...our little second-graderwho just got accepted
68
00:03:02,223 --> 00:03:03,808
-into the best school in town.
-(laughter)
69
00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:05,143
Yay, Tabitha!
70
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:06,644
TIM:
We're so proud.
71
00:03:06,686 --> 00:03:08,313
I still keep in touchwith the old gang, too.
72
00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:09,856
Believe it or not,Jimbo is mayor now.
73
00:03:09,898 --> 00:03:11,608
-BOTH: Cookie!
-Of course, his wife, Staci,
74
00:03:11,649 --> 00:03:13,443
is the real brainsbehind the operation.
75
00:03:13,485 --> 00:03:15,320
-MAN: Yo, Jimbo!
-Now, the Triplets...
76
00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:16,738
-* Busted... *
-* Busted... *
77
00:03:16,780 --> 00:03:18,365
-* Busted. *
-(sirens wailing)
78
00:03:18,406 --> 00:03:20,033
TIM: Yeah,they haven't changed much.
79
00:03:20,075 --> 00:03:21,910
And as formy baby brother, Ted,
80
00:03:21,951 --> 00:03:24,037
well, he grew upto be the boss, all right.
81
00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:26,623
-He's so busy we hardly seehim anymore.-(toy squeaking)
82
00:03:26,664 --> 00:03:28,458
-(phone rings)
-But, hey, he always remembers
83
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,919
to send inappropriatelylavish gifts
84
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:32,712
-on special occasions.
-(Tabitha squeals)
85
00:03:32,754 --> 00:03:35,548
-OMG! Uncle Ted is the best!
-(neighing)
86
00:03:35,590 --> 00:03:37,717
-(clatters)
-(Tim gasps)
87
00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:38,885
(sighs)
88
00:03:38,927 --> 00:03:40,345
TIM:
All in all,
89
00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:42,263
my life is pretty perfect.
90
00:03:42,305 --> 00:03:43,598
(insects trilling,
birds chirping)
91
00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,850
But all thatwas about to change.
92
00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:47,894
(yelps, gasps)
93
00:03:47,936 --> 00:03:49,145
Good heavens.
94
00:03:49,187 --> 00:03:51,314
I'll save you!
95
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,316
-Ha!
-(Tina screams, laughs)
96
00:03:53,358 --> 00:03:54,901
Thanks, babe.
97
00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:56,319
Stay calm, Tabitha.
98
00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:57,779
I'm coming for you.
99
00:03:57,821 --> 00:04:01,783
I'm gonna save you
from the bubbling lava!
100
00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:03,410
Dad, what are you doing?
101
00:04:03,451 --> 00:04:05,829
Ew, gross. It went everywhere.
102
00:04:05,870 --> 00:04:08,415
Come on, this is
the candy volcano of doom!
103
00:04:08,456 --> 00:04:10,625
You used to love it.
(mimics explosion)
104
00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,752
But I'm trying
to do my homework,
105
00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:14,254
or I'm doomed.
106
00:04:14,295 --> 00:04:16,006
Oh.
107
00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:18,216
Because if there'sone thing I've learned,
108
00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:19,926
you're only a kid once.
109
00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:23,304
Once you grow up,you can never go back.
110
00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:26,266
(babbling)
111
00:04:26,307 --> 00:04:28,518
Ee...!
112
00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:31,312
(grunts)
113
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:34,983
(gasps) Oh, no.
114
00:04:36,651 --> 00:04:38,737
Good night, Dr. Hawking.
115
00:04:42,657 --> 00:04:46,828
Carbon, boron, beryllium,
lithium, helium, hydrogen.
116
00:04:46,870 --> 00:04:48,913
Nailed it.
117
00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:50,832
Boom shakalaka.
118
00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:54,377
(laughs)
119
00:04:54,419 --> 00:04:56,463
"Carry the four."
(chuckles) Gosh.
120
00:04:56,504 --> 00:04:58,089
-TIM: Hey there, Tabitha.
-(Carol whoops, Tina laughs)
121
00:04:58,131 --> 00:04:59,632
It's The Good Night Show.
122
00:04:59,674 --> 00:05:02,552
Live from your bedroom,
starring Dad and Mom.
123
00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:05,305
-And special guest, baby Tina.
-(laughing)
124
00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:07,474
Good night, little Tina. Mwah!
125
00:05:07,515 --> 00:05:09,267
Come back here, you.
(chuckles)
126
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:10,852
-Good night, Mom.
-Mwah!
127
00:05:10,894 --> 00:05:12,520
Good night, sweetheart.
Mama's gonna kiss you.
128
00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:13,980
-Mama gonna kiss you.
-(Tim clears throat)
129
00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:15,190
* Good night song *
130
00:05:15,231 --> 00:05:16,691
-* With your dad... *
-What?
131
00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,318
What? It's time for
your good-night song.
132
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:20,028
Oh, no, thanks.
133
00:05:20,070 --> 00:05:22,405
I'm listening to white noise!
134
00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:23,990
Helps me fall asleep!
135
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:26,159
(mimicking white noise)
136
00:05:26,201 --> 00:05:28,370
Hey, what would you say
137
00:05:28,411 --> 00:05:31,331
to me helping you rehearse
for the holiday pageant?
138
00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:32,791
-(gasps)
-Yes! Right?
139
00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:34,668
I can come to school with you,
and you can get
140
00:05:34,709 --> 00:05:36,336
all your friends together,
and we can rehearse together,
141
00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:38,338
go get some ice cream after.
142
00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:40,423
-My treat.
-No! You can't do that.
143
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,467
Um, liability issues.
144
00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:44,344
It's this whole thing.
145
00:05:44,386 --> 00:05:46,680
Oh. Right, right.
(chuckles)
146
00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:47,931
Right.
147
00:05:47,972 --> 00:05:50,558
Whoa. How about your favorite
bedtime story?
148
00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,477
You know, the one about...
149
00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:54,562
Uncle Ted was
a magical talking baby.
150
00:05:54,604 --> 00:05:56,606
There was a rocket
full of puppies,
151
00:05:56,648 --> 00:05:58,608
-and you saved the world.
-(shushing)
152
00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:00,026
It was a good story, wasn't it?
153
00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:04,072
Well, it didn't really make
a lot of sense.
154
00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:05,865
The jokes were good, right?
155
00:06:05,907 --> 00:06:07,325
Mm.
156
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,369
-Okay. Um...
-Dad.
157
00:06:09,411 --> 00:06:10,662
(yawns)
158
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:13,039
My schedule is brutal tomorrow.
159
00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:16,042
(grunting): Yeah. My schedule's
pretty brutal, too.
160
00:06:16,084 --> 00:06:18,044
Oh, don't forget Lamb Lamb.
161
00:06:18,086 --> 00:06:19,879
Good night, Lamb Lamb.
162
00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:21,798
(kisses)
Good night, Uncle Ted.
163
00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:24,634
I hope to grow up and be
a success, just like you.
164
00:06:24,676 --> 00:06:26,928
Maybe we'll see you soon.
165
00:06:31,016 --> 00:06:32,934
Good night, Tabitha.
166
00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:36,938
Don't you think
I'm a little old for that now?
167
00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:39,607
Uh, okay.
168
00:06:39,649 --> 00:06:42,152
I think it's time
we both grow up.
169
00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:45,530
I look forward to greeting you
at the breakfast table.
170
00:06:51,619 --> 00:06:53,830
Sweet dreams.
171
00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:11,723
Hmm.
172
00:07:13,016 --> 00:07:15,101
* *
173
00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:23,443
Where has the time gone?
174
00:07:23,485 --> 00:07:25,904
WIZZIE:
How should I know? (grunts)
175
00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:28,698
-Wait, wait. I see light.
-(toy train tooting)
176
00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:31,659
You, oh, out of my way.
(yells)
177
00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:33,787
(gasps) At long last.
178
00:07:33,828 --> 00:07:36,498
The sweet breath of freedom.
179
00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:37,749
Wizzie?
180
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,459
You there,
what century is this?
181
00:07:39,501 --> 00:07:41,795
(shudders)
Unhand me, vile ogre!
182
00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:43,380
No, no, no, no.
Wizzie, it's me.
183
00:07:43,421 --> 00:07:44,923
-It's Tim.
-(gasps)
184
00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:46,883
Is it really you?
185
00:07:46,925 --> 00:07:48,551
Come closer.
186
00:07:48,593 --> 00:07:50,512
Let me see your face.
187
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:52,305
Closer.
188
00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,391
Closer still.
189
00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:56,226
Oh, Timothy.
190
00:07:56,267 --> 00:07:57,477
It is you.
191
00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,187
Hey! What was that for?
192
00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:01,398
You cast me into
eternal darkness
193
00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:04,317
and wreaked havoc
on my circadian rhythms.
194
00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:05,652
I'm sorry, Wizzie.
195
00:08:05,694 --> 00:08:07,320
Hey, but you look great,
though.
196
00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:09,531
Except for the arm, you mean.
197
00:08:09,572 --> 00:08:10,824
(chuckles)
I didn't even notice.
198
00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:12,242
-You thought it.
-I mean, I noticed it,
199
00:08:12,283 --> 00:08:13,868
'cause I... you obviously
don't have an arm. I-I...
200
00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:15,787
You would never treat
Lamb Lamb this way.
201
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:18,581
Well, I... I gave her
to my daughter, Tabitha.
202
00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:20,375
You have produced
an heir, Timothy?
203
00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:21,710
Two, actually.
204
00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:23,253
Two? Let the bells ring!
205
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:24,629
(bells jingling,
alarms blaring)
206
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:26,297
-No, no, no. Wizzie, stop.
-Yes! Yes!
207
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:28,174
-Wizzie, shh! Quiet, quiet.
-It's a time for celebration!
208
00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:30,176
No, no, no. It's not
the time for celebration.
209
00:08:30,218 --> 00:08:31,886
-Wizzie, shh. Be quiet.
-What? What is it?
210
00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:33,805
-What is it, Tim?
-I don't know.
211
00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:35,640
-(alarms stop)
-I guess I'm just not feeling
212
00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:37,767
very celebratory right now.
213
00:08:37,809 --> 00:08:39,686
Oh?
214
00:08:39,728 --> 00:08:41,521
Tabitha. (sighs)
215
00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:45,692
Man, Wizzie,
she's growing up so fast.
216
00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:47,736
It's like she doesn't even
need me anymore.
217
00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:51,322
Yes, first, they start
spending less time with you.
218
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:52,782
TIM:
Mm.
219
00:08:52,824 --> 00:08:54,993
Then they stop coming
to you for advice.
220
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:55,994
Exactly.
221
00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:58,121
Soon, they take you
for granted.
222
00:08:58,163 --> 00:08:59,539
I guess.
223
00:08:59,581 --> 00:09:01,499
-Then break your arm.
-What?
224
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,084
Then stuff you into a box!
225
00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:05,045
Okay. Wizzie, you're...
you're not helping.
226
00:09:05,086 --> 00:09:06,338
(Wizzie scoffs)
227
00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:07,714
Okay, I'm just... I'm afraid
228
00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:09,799
Tabitha and I
are growing apart,
229
00:09:09,841 --> 00:09:12,886
like... like I did
with my brother.
230
00:09:12,927 --> 00:09:14,596
Oh.
231
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:17,682
I thought we had
all the time in the world.
232
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,393
But you can't
turn back time, can you?
233
00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:23,021
How dare you question my power!
234
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:26,441
-Turn back. Turn back.
-Oh, here we go.
235
00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:29,069
-Oh, great wheel of li...
-Wait. (shushes)
236
00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:30,904
-(Wizzie snoring)
-Did you hear that?
237
00:09:30,945 --> 00:09:33,907
(gasps)
Never abuse the snooze button!
238
00:09:33,948 --> 00:09:35,992
(shushes) It sounds like it's
coming from the baby's room.
239
00:09:36,034 --> 00:09:37,994
What is it?
A creature of the night?
240
00:09:38,036 --> 00:09:41,081
Witches? Is it the baying
of the hounds of hell?
241
00:09:41,122 --> 00:09:42,415
Wizzie!
242
00:09:42,457 --> 00:09:43,583
Don't go, Tim!
243
00:09:43,625 --> 00:09:45,168
I can turn back time--
244
00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:48,755
to the golden years,
when it was just you and me.
245
00:09:48,797 --> 00:09:50,423
My good arm.
246
00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:52,175
Don't open the door.
247
00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:54,094
(fading in distance):
Remember last time!
248
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:56,638
(muffled voice
speaking indistinctly)
249
00:09:57,806 --> 00:09:59,808
AUTOMATED VOICE: If you would
like to make a call,
250
00:09:59,849 --> 00:10:01,309
please hang up and try again.
251
00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:05,480
If you need help, hang up
and then dial your operator.
252
00:10:05,522 --> 00:10:07,273
Thank you.
253
00:10:07,315 --> 00:10:08,441
(whispers):
Hello?
254
00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:10,026
If you would like
to make a call,
255
00:10:10,068 --> 00:10:12,696
-please hang up and try again.
-Ah. Just my phone.
256
00:10:12,737 --> 00:10:14,823
Get it together, man.
257
00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:17,158
Oh, Tina, you little klepto...
258
00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,244
Nighty night.
259
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:20,453
...maniac!
260
00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:22,956
(rapid babbling)
261
00:10:22,997 --> 00:10:24,124
Whoa!
262
00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:26,876
Hi, Daddy.
263
00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:28,962
T-Tabitha? Is that you?
264
00:10:29,004 --> 00:10:30,213
(laughing)
265
00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:31,631
(gasps)
266
00:10:31,673 --> 00:10:33,675
(laughing):
You should've seen your face.
267
00:10:33,717 --> 00:10:35,552
Oh, it's priceless.
268
00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:37,053
You're... You... You-you...
269
00:10:37,095 --> 00:10:39,472
(mock gasping)
270
00:10:39,514 --> 00:10:40,974
You-you can talk?
271
00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:43,143
Yep.
I'm in the family business.
272
00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:45,812
(whispers):
It's a clip-on tie. (shushes)
273
00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:48,106
You see, Daddy,
BabyCorp is more of what I...
274
00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:49,774
Oops.
275
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,152
Daddy, Daddy, come in.
Can you hear me?
276
00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:53,778
-Daddy, do you read me?
-(Tim groaning)
277
00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:55,488
Daddy, how many fingers
am I holding up?
278
00:10:55,530 --> 00:10:56,698
Thursday?
279
00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:57,991
I should've given you
a warning.
280
00:10:58,033 --> 00:10:59,534
I forgot you were an old man.
281
00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:01,036
(yells, spits)
282
00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:02,037
Wait, wait.
283
00:11:02,078 --> 00:11:03,913
-You're from BabyCorp?
-Yes.
284
00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:05,915
BabyCorp is more of what I call
285
00:11:05,957 --> 00:11:07,751
-a side hustle for me.
-Uh-huh.
286
00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:09,836
The point is I'm all in
on the Templetons.
287
00:11:09,878 --> 00:11:11,338
-Go, Templetons!
-Oh! Okay.
288
00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:13,173
You guys really know
how to baby a baby.
289
00:11:13,214 --> 00:11:14,758
-I mean, it's incredible.
-Oh, oh. (chuckles)
290
00:11:14,799 --> 00:11:16,343
Not that's it's all five-star.
291
00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:18,345
-I have to say, you got
a lot of issues. -Sure. Yeah.
292
00:11:18,386 --> 00:11:19,554
We'll talk about that later.
293
00:11:19,596 --> 00:11:20,972
Oh, my gosh.
I can't believe this.
294
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:23,141
Hey, want to go scare
the crap out of Mom?
295
00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:25,101
-Daddy, please stay focused.
-(chuckles) Oh.
296
00:11:25,143 --> 00:11:26,644
(grunts)
Right, right, right.
297
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:28,355
There's a crisis at BabyCorp.
298
00:11:28,396 --> 00:11:29,481
What is it this time?
299
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:30,523
(gasps) Kittens?
300
00:11:30,565 --> 00:11:32,650
No. This time, it's even worse.
301
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:33,902
-Worse than kittens?
-Yes.
302
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,695
That's why I volunteered for
303
00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:37,572
-this supersecret assignment.
-TOY: Mommy.
304
00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:39,491
Ooh, I want to help.
What-what do you want me to do?
305
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,034
That's the spirit, Daddy.
306
00:11:41,076 --> 00:11:43,870
-You are exactly who I need.
-Yes!
307
00:11:43,912 --> 00:11:45,663
To get Uncle Ted.
308
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:47,374
No. What?
309
00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:48,875
What-What's with the face?
310
00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:51,378
Daddy, BabyCorp can't wait
any longer.
311
00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:52,671
All the pressure's on me, Pop.
312
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:54,881
When I volunteered
for this gig,
313
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:56,800
I thought it would be easy.
314
00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:58,385
But you two never
see each other.
315
00:11:58,426 --> 00:11:59,969
It's so sad.
316
00:12:00,011 --> 00:12:02,180
It's like, "F-minus.
See me after class."
317
00:12:02,222 --> 00:12:03,390
(gargles)
318
00:12:03,431 --> 00:12:04,724
Sad? Uh, yeah, maybe.
319
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:05,934
A little. I don't know.
320
00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:07,352
Did you forget to call him?
321
00:12:07,394 --> 00:12:09,270
I noticed you can be
a little absentminded.
322
00:12:09,312 --> 00:12:10,647
Sorry, what?
323
00:12:10,689 --> 00:12:12,399
It's just that you tend
to procrastinate.
324
00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:14,567
-You have to get him here for
the holidays. -(line ringing)
325
00:12:14,609 --> 00:12:15,860
-No, I'm not...
-(ringing stops)
326
00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:17,278
No, I'm not
gonna call him right now.
327
00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:18,738
-Daddy, can't never could.
-No. -(line ringing)
328
00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:20,115
Did you two have
a fight or something?
329
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:21,908
-No.
-But you're mad at him?
330
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:24,202
-Stop that. It's complicated.
-(ringing stops)
331
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,329
-Why? Do you need help using
your phone? -(line ringing)
332
00:12:26,371 --> 00:12:28,081
-No, I don't need help
using my... -(ringing stops)
333
00:12:28,123 --> 00:12:29,624
-Okay. What's the problem?
-(sighs) -(line ringing)
334
00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:31,126
What's the issue?
Talk to me.
335
00:12:31,167 --> 00:12:32,877
-There's no point, okay?
-(ringing stops)
336
00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:34,921
I call him. I invite him.
He never shows up.
337
00:12:34,963 --> 00:12:36,923
He's always got a work meeting
or a business trip
338
00:12:36,965 --> 00:12:38,591
or a conference call.
339
00:12:38,633 --> 00:12:40,468
All he cares about is work.
340
00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:44,431
But after a while, you...
you just stop trying.
341
00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:46,641
-He's still your brother.
-(line ringing)
342
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:48,935
You were partners.
343
00:12:48,977 --> 00:12:50,687
-Yeah, I guess sometimes
you just... -(ringing stops)
344
00:12:50,729 --> 00:12:54,816
you grow up and grow apart.
345
00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:57,902
-(line ringing)
-(gasps)
346
00:12:57,944 --> 00:12:59,571
Daddy, don't say no.
347
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:00,989
What if everybody said no?
348
00:13:01,031 --> 00:13:02,157
Nothing would happen.
349
00:13:02,198 --> 00:13:03,575
Nothing would get
off the ground.
350
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:04,909
You got to wake up every day
351
00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:06,703
and you got to say,
"Yes, yes, yes!"
352
00:13:06,745 --> 00:13:10,123
Surprise me. Say yes.
353
00:13:10,165 --> 00:13:11,291
(sighs)
354
00:13:11,332 --> 00:13:12,167
(ringing stops)
355
00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:14,794
This is really disappointing.
356
00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:17,088
-And now I'm getting mad!
-It's late.
357
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,174
We can work on this
tomorrow, okay?
358
00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:20,884
-(grunts)
-(toy squeaks)
359
00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:23,803
Oh. Whoopsie.
Your little horsey fell off.
360
00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:26,348
Another day won't hurt, right?
361
00:13:27,349 --> 00:13:28,850
Good night, sweetie.
362
00:13:28,892 --> 00:13:30,602
-(door closes)
-(scoffs)
363
00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:33,188
(tape rewinding)
364
00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:34,647
TIM (recorded):
Good night, sweetie.
365
00:13:34,689 --> 00:13:36,483
-...horsey fell off.
-(rewinding)
366
00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:38,151
Tabitha?
367
00:13:41,363 --> 00:13:43,406
* *
368
00:13:50,872 --> 00:13:52,999
(low rumbling,
objects rattling)
369
00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:56,503
Huh?
370
00:13:56,544 --> 00:13:58,380
(gasps, squeals)
371
00:14:12,394 --> 00:14:14,437
* *
372
00:14:25,824 --> 00:14:27,409
Uh, don't worry. I got it.
373
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:29,285
-(Tim yells, groans)
-Where is she? Where is she?
374
00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:31,037
-Where's who? What?
-I came as fast as I could.
375
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,580
-Ted?
-I canceled all my meetings.
376
00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,541
What are you doing here?
(grunts) Why are you yelling?
377
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:35,792
-Where's Tabitha?
-Tabitha?
378
00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:37,210
-Where is she, Tim?
-CAROL: Ted.
379
00:14:37,252 --> 00:14:38,878
Uncle Ted, you're here!
You're really here.
380
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,463
-Which arm is it?
Left or right? -Huh?
381
00:14:40,505 --> 00:14:42,382
-Is it your fibula? Talk to me.
-Whoa.
382
00:14:42,424 --> 00:14:44,050
-Good dilation. Open up.
-(groans)
383
00:14:44,092 --> 00:14:45,969
-Say, "Ah." Are you okay?
-Wh-What are you doing?
384
00:14:46,011 --> 00:14:47,262
-You look okay.
-Whoa.
385
00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:49,055
Don't worry.
I'm fine, Uncle Ted.
386
00:14:49,097 --> 00:14:51,391
-That's my girl.
-Woo-hoo.
387
00:14:51,433 --> 00:14:53,018
Uh, wh-what brings you
into town?
388
00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:54,394
Well, Tabitha fell
off her pony.
389
00:14:54,436 --> 00:14:56,229
-She did?
-She did?
390
00:14:56,271 --> 00:14:57,230
I did?
391
00:14:57,272 --> 00:14:59,399
-Tim left me a voice mail.
-He did?
392
00:14:59,441 --> 00:15:00,942
-I did?
-You did.
393
00:15:00,984 --> 00:15:02,861
TIM (cobbled from recording):
Hello. This is your brother.
394
00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:04,571
Help. Tabitha fell off horsey.
395
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:05,822
Good night, sweetie.
396
00:15:05,864 --> 00:15:07,490
Well, that was unsettling.
397
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:11,077
I swear I didn't
leave that message.
398
00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:14,164
-(coos)
-On... purpose.
399
00:15:14,205 --> 00:15:15,290
I...
400
00:15:15,331 --> 00:15:16,291
Butt-dialed?
401
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:17,792
(chuckles)
With my butt.
402
00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:19,169
While I was talking
in my sleep.
403
00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:20,754
I do that sometimes.
404
00:15:20,795 --> 00:15:22,380
You sleep-butt-dialed me?
405
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:25,467
-With my butt.
-(Carol chuckling)
406
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:28,887
I knew there must be a
perfectly logical explanation.
407
00:15:28,928 --> 00:15:30,680
(chuckles)
And there it is.
408
00:15:30,722 --> 00:15:32,599
-TED: Hmm. -All that matters
is that you're here.
409
00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:34,809
-TABITHA: Woo-hoo! Yay!
-(Tina squeals)
410
00:15:34,851 --> 00:15:36,269
-Absolutely. Uh, for now.
-(Tina giggling)
411
00:15:36,311 --> 00:15:38,271
Uncle Ted, please stay
for Christmas. Please.
412
00:15:38,313 --> 00:15:40,940
Sorry, sweetie. I can't
do Christmas on the 25th.
413
00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:43,193
But, Uncle Ted,
I missed you so much.
414
00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:44,944
(echoing):I missed you so much.
415
00:15:44,986 --> 00:15:46,613
-I missed you so much.
-Mm... wah!
416
00:15:46,654 --> 00:15:48,573
TABITHA: Don't you thinkI'm a little old for that now?
417
00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:50,283
(echoing): Don't you thinkI'm a little old for that now?
418
00:15:50,325 --> 00:15:51,951
Don't you thinkI'm a little old for that now?
419
00:15:51,993 --> 00:15:53,995
(chuckles) Can I talk to you
in the kitchen?
420
00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:56,373
Alone.
421
00:15:58,124 --> 00:16:00,377
-TED: The baby, Tim?
-(shushes)
422
00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:03,046
She's been sent from up there.
423
00:16:03,088 --> 00:16:05,715
-Upstairs?
-That's right. BabyCorp.
424
00:16:05,757 --> 00:16:09,260
So you're saying the voice mail
was some kind of call for help.
425
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:11,262
Yes! No.
426
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:14,182
She comes from a secret
corporation run by babies.
427
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:18,144
Tim, I'm gonna give you
the name of a doctor.
428
00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:21,981
Roy Federman. Just tell him
I sent you, okay?
429
00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:23,233
(hushed):
What are they saying?
430
00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:24,734
We should give them
some privacy.
431
00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:26,027
-Here you go.
-Ooh. Thanks.
432
00:16:26,069 --> 00:16:27,362
TIM:
I'm not crazy!
433
00:16:27,404 --> 00:16:29,114
You just don't remember.
Tell him, Tina.
434
00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:30,448
-He... I...
-TED: She can't talk, Tim.
435
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,158
-TIM: Stop interrupting.
-(Tina groans)
436
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:33,493
TED: Interrupting what?
I don't hear anything.
437
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:35,662
Except your obnoxious voice.
You hear that.
438
00:16:35,704 --> 00:16:37,831
I have a beautiful voice.
439
00:16:37,872 --> 00:16:39,249
-(groans)
-TIM: Fine.
440
00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:41,126
I can prove that
everything I'm saying is real.
441
00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:42,502
-TED: Oh, yeah?
-TIM: Yeah!
442
00:16:42,544 --> 00:16:43,503
Suck it, Ted.
443
00:16:43,545 --> 00:16:44,546
I beg your pardon?
444
00:16:44,587 --> 00:16:45,672
You, suck.
445
00:16:45,714 --> 00:16:47,132
No, no, Tim. You suck.
446
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:48,508
CAROL: Time to go buy
a Christmas tree.
447
00:16:48,550 --> 00:16:50,218
But we already have
a Christmas tree.
448
00:16:50,260 --> 00:16:52,429
-No, we don't. No, we don't.
-Yes, we do. Yes, we do.
449
00:16:52,470 --> 00:16:54,014
Suck it, suck it, suck it,
suck it, suck it, suck it.
450
00:16:54,055 --> 00:16:55,557
-Get that pacie out of my face!
-Excuse me.
451
00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:58,685
I hate to interrupt,
but may I make a suggestion?
452
00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:00,061
Why don't you both suck it?
453
00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:02,022
-Ha! (whoops)
-(grunts)
454
00:17:02,063 --> 00:17:03,815
(grunting)
455
00:17:03,857 --> 00:17:05,817
-She can talk.
-A lot.
456
00:17:05,859 --> 00:17:06,985
(whoops)
457
00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:08,611
Buckle up, boys.
458
00:17:08,653 --> 00:17:10,238
(sucking rapidly)
459
00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:12,532
(all screaming)
460
00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:14,868
-TINA: Baby on board!
-(Tim whooping)
461
00:17:14,909 --> 00:17:17,078
-That's what I'm talking about!
-(laughs) Woo-hoo!
462
00:17:17,120 --> 00:17:19,497
(screaming)
463
00:17:20,874 --> 00:17:22,042
(sighs)
464
00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:24,586
* *
465
00:17:31,885 --> 00:17:33,595
TIM:
Yeah! Woo-hoo!
466
00:17:34,763 --> 00:17:36,056
(both grunt)
467
00:17:36,097 --> 00:17:37,724
(yelps)
468
00:17:37,766 --> 00:17:39,768
-Wow.
-(Tina laughs)
469
00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:41,394
(gasps)
470
00:17:41,436 --> 00:17:42,729
I'm home.
471
00:17:42,771 --> 00:17:44,022
TIM:
Yeah. See?
472
00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:45,482
It's all real.
473
00:17:45,523 --> 00:17:46,566
TED:
Whoa.
474
00:17:46,608 --> 00:17:48,735
Is that me?
475
00:17:48,777 --> 00:17:51,488
TINA: If you're fishing for
a compliment, you caught one!
476
00:17:51,529 --> 00:17:53,907
You are a legend in this joint.
477
00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:55,408
A statue?
478
00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:57,952
Well, I did single-handedly
save the company.
479
00:17:57,994 --> 00:17:59,496
Double-handedly.
480
00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:00,914
(chuckling):
Right? We were partners.
481
00:18:00,955 --> 00:18:02,040
Really?
482
00:18:02,082 --> 00:18:03,750
I don't see your statue.
483
00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:05,377
I still love you, Daddy.
484
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,379
TIM:
They got the head size right.
485
00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:08,672
(ding)
486
00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:10,924
TED: Take it from me,
you have to be aggressive
487
00:18:10,965 --> 00:18:12,217
if you want to get ahead.
488
00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:13,927
Climb that corporate ladder
489
00:18:13,968 --> 00:18:16,596
-until you're the last baby
standing at the top. -TIM: Wow.
490
00:18:16,638 --> 00:18:19,557
Actually, I prioritize
a good work-life balance
491
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:23,103
and a positive environment
where my ideas are valued.
492
00:18:23,144 --> 00:18:25,271
(laughing)
493
00:18:25,313 --> 00:18:26,648
Oh, you're serious.
494
00:18:26,690 --> 00:18:28,525
You're funny, Uncle Ted.
495
00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:30,777
I wonder why they didn't
mention that in your file.
496
00:18:30,819 --> 00:18:31,945
My file?
497
00:18:31,986 --> 00:18:33,488
-You saw my file?
-(Tim sighs)
498
00:18:33,530 --> 00:18:34,781
-Yep.
-What does it say?
499
00:18:34,823 --> 00:18:36,116
It says a lot.
500
00:18:36,157 --> 00:18:38,535
-This is the Crisis Center.
-Whoa. Wow.
501
00:18:38,576 --> 00:18:41,037
This is where we monitor
all threats
502
00:18:41,079 --> 00:18:43,039
to babies around the world.
503
00:18:43,081 --> 00:18:44,332
And Hawaii.
504
00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:46,126
This is so cool.
This is so cool.
505
00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:48,128
(roaring):
I'm Godzilla.
506
00:18:48,169 --> 00:18:49,671
"Oh, run for your lives!
Run for your lives!"
507
00:18:49,713 --> 00:18:52,048
-Why did we bring him?
-Daddy, get down from there.
508
00:18:52,090 --> 00:18:54,801
-Aw. -We can play on it later
when no one is looking.
509
00:18:54,843 --> 00:18:56,511
-What's the crisis?
-Yeah.
510
00:18:56,553 --> 00:18:58,138
Here we go.
What's the crisis, sweetie?
511
00:18:58,179 --> 00:18:59,556
Rusty, roll it.
512
00:18:59,597 --> 00:19:01,474
(snores, whines)
513
00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:03,476
He's new.
514
00:19:03,518 --> 00:19:07,313
DR. ARMSTRONG (over speakers):
Just imagine, baby surgeons.
515
00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,649
-(buzzer sounds) -Uh-oh.
-(babies giggling)
516
00:19:09,691 --> 00:19:11,985
Or baby astronauts.
517
00:19:12,027 --> 00:19:15,155
(singsongy):
Floaty, floaty, float.
518
00:19:15,196 --> 00:19:18,491
Yes, babies are gonna
run the world one day.
519
00:19:18,533 --> 00:19:21,745
And that day is coming
sooner than you think.
520
00:19:21,786 --> 00:19:24,748
Hello. My name is
Dr. Erwin Armstrong,
521
00:19:24,789 --> 00:19:27,334
founder of The Acorn Center
for Advanced Childhood.
522
00:19:27,375 --> 00:19:29,294
Wait a minute, that's...
that's Tabitha's school.
523
00:19:29,336 --> 00:19:31,671
Here at the center,
we believe babies
524
00:19:31,713 --> 00:19:34,299
are the ultimate
learning machines.
525
00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:36,259
Isn't that right,
little Nathan?
526
00:19:36,301 --> 00:19:38,428
-Yeah!
-(chuckles): Okay.
527
00:19:38,470 --> 00:19:40,013
They should use
their precious time
528
00:19:40,055 --> 00:19:42,474
to develop faster, push harder.
529
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:43,892
-Hmm. -(Tim scoffs)
-Parents, they have the best
530
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:46,853
intentions, of course,
but they're not experts.
531
00:19:46,895 --> 00:19:50,982
After all, the only thing
holding your child back is...
532
00:19:51,024 --> 00:19:52,776
-you.
-KIDS: You!
533
00:19:52,817 --> 00:19:55,487
This explains why Tabitha's
been pulling away from me.
534
00:19:55,528 --> 00:19:57,405
-It's the school.
-ARMSTRONG: Everybody, wave.
535
00:19:57,447 --> 00:19:58,990
-Bye, Mommy.
-KIDS: Bye, Mommy!
536
00:19:59,032 --> 00:20:00,241
-Bye, Daddy.
-Bye, Daddy!
537
00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:02,869
(singsongy):
Sayonara.
538
00:20:02,911 --> 00:20:04,954
Now, in the past six months,
539
00:20:04,996 --> 00:20:07,957
these schools have been
popping up all over the world.
540
00:20:07,999 --> 00:20:09,209
Uh, so what's the problem?
541
00:20:09,250 --> 00:20:10,877
The school is the problem.
542
00:20:10,919 --> 00:20:12,337
Yeah. School is evil.
543
00:20:12,379 --> 00:20:14,547
No, Daddy,
not all schools are evil.
544
00:20:14,589 --> 00:20:16,675
-It's just this one, okay?
-Okay.
545
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:18,802
If Armstrong's philosophy
keeps spreading,
546
00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:20,970
it could be
the end of childhood.
547
00:20:21,012 --> 00:20:22,430
No.
548
00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:24,766
Childhood was the worst
three years of my life.
549
00:20:24,808 --> 00:20:26,351
That's so sad.
550
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:28,228
You probably just
didn't do it right.
551
00:20:28,269 --> 00:20:29,521
-Huh?
-Aw.
552
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:31,773
But luckily, you get a do-over.
553
00:20:31,815 --> 00:20:33,983
A second chance.
554
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:38,655
BabyCorp has developed
a new super-duper baby formula
555
00:20:38,697 --> 00:20:41,574
-that can turn a grown-up
back into a baby. -(baby coos)
556
00:20:41,616 --> 00:20:43,910
We have it in cherry, grape,
orange and lime.
557
00:20:43,952 --> 00:20:45,704
-For real?
-Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
558
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,664
-You want me to be a baby?
-Hey, it's what you do best.
559
00:20:47,706 --> 00:20:49,791
So you can infiltrate
the school and find out
560
00:20:49,833 --> 00:20:52,502
what Dr. Armstrong
is really up to.
561
00:20:52,544 --> 00:20:55,088
BabyCorp will
take care of the rest.
562
00:20:55,130 --> 00:20:56,923
(whoops)
563
00:20:56,965 --> 00:20:58,591
(Tim gasps, laughs)
564
00:20:58,633 --> 00:21:00,593
It's the perfect disguise.
565
00:21:00,635 --> 00:21:03,555
And it only lasts
48 teensy-weensy hours.
566
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,348
Oh, I am in on the mission.
567
00:21:05,390 --> 00:21:06,516
-Sorry, Pops.
-Ow.
568
00:21:06,558 --> 00:21:08,393
-It's not your mission.
-Aw.
569
00:21:08,435 --> 00:21:10,437
"Warning:
may cause drooling, babbling,
570
00:21:10,478 --> 00:21:12,272
"emotional outbursts,
fits of laughter,
571
00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:16,276
loss of bowel control,
chubby thighs"?
572
00:21:16,317 --> 00:21:19,112
I think some guys at my gym
take this stuff.
573
00:21:19,154 --> 00:21:20,238
(screams)
574
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:22,032
My texting hand!
575
00:21:22,073 --> 00:21:24,367
-Even though it is your
daughter's school. -(screaming)
576
00:21:24,409 --> 00:21:25,869
Doesn't seem fair, does it?
577
00:21:25,910 --> 00:21:27,370
Daddy, no. Please stop.
578
00:21:27,412 --> 00:21:28,788
(glugs) Whoa!
579
00:21:28,830 --> 00:21:30,498
(babbling rapidly)
580
00:21:30,540 --> 00:21:32,417
What? It actually works.
581
00:21:32,459 --> 00:21:33,626
(Ted straining)
582
00:21:33,668 --> 00:21:35,462
-TED: It's mine!
-(yells)
583
00:21:35,503 --> 00:21:37,297
-I'm better with
this kind of thing! -Oh!
584
00:21:37,339 --> 00:21:38,840
(glugs, screams)
585
00:21:38,882 --> 00:21:41,134
And what kind of thing is that,
Flock of Seagulls?
586
00:21:41,176 --> 00:21:42,969
-(both grunting)
-(record scratches)
587
00:21:43,011 --> 00:21:45,263
("The Time Warp" from RockyHorror Picture Showplaying)
588
00:21:45,305 --> 00:21:46,806
-Everything!
-Gotcha!
589
00:21:46,848 --> 00:21:49,642
You might feel very emotional,
have some mood swings.
590
00:21:49,684 --> 00:21:50,935
-(glugging)
-(Ted yells)
591
00:21:50,977 --> 00:21:52,187
Oh! (babbles)
592
00:21:52,228 --> 00:21:53,730
Hey! (screams)
593
00:21:53,772 --> 00:21:56,024
Ouch.
There's the awkward stage.
594
00:21:56,066 --> 00:21:57,650
Now, the tea's hot, Connie.
595
00:21:57,692 --> 00:21:59,652
You always have to be
the hero, don't you?
596
00:21:59,694 --> 00:22:01,571
What's that supposed to mean?
(grunts)
597
00:22:01,613 --> 00:22:03,823
Never see him...
(frightened whimpering)
598
00:22:03,865 --> 00:22:05,825
All of a sudden,
he shows up with a pony.
599
00:22:05,867 --> 00:22:09,079
(screams) You're just jealous,
helmet head.
600
00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:10,497
She's my daughter!
601
00:22:10,538 --> 00:22:12,165
She's my niece. (screams)
602
00:22:12,207 --> 00:22:14,167
-(grunts)
-Do you want cream or sugar?
603
00:22:14,209 --> 00:22:15,710
(both yelling)
604
00:22:15,752 --> 00:22:17,712
I was always
the successful one.
605
00:22:17,754 --> 00:22:20,340
Mommy says no running
in the house.
606
00:22:20,382 --> 00:22:21,591
(slurps) Mm.
607
00:22:21,633 --> 00:22:23,843
Hand over the bottle, mullet.
608
00:22:23,885 --> 00:22:25,637
(grunting)
609
00:22:25,679 --> 00:22:28,014
-(screams)
-You can't hug money, you know.
610
00:22:28,056 --> 00:22:29,307
(glugs, babbles)
611
00:22:29,349 --> 00:22:30,725
(grunts)
612
00:22:31,685 --> 00:22:34,145
But you can, Tim. You can.
613
00:22:34,187 --> 00:22:37,148
(both yelling)
614
00:22:37,190 --> 00:22:39,067
Men. Am I right?
615
00:22:39,109 --> 00:22:42,112
(both yelling, grunting)
616
00:22:42,153 --> 00:22:44,030
(glugging)
617
00:22:44,072 --> 00:22:46,116
(slow-motion yelling)
618
00:22:46,157 --> 00:22:48,243
(screams, grunts)
619
00:22:48,284 --> 00:22:49,953
It's not personal.
620
00:22:49,994 --> 00:22:51,788
It's business, Leslie.
621
00:22:51,830 --> 00:22:52,872
(grunts)
622
00:22:52,914 --> 00:22:54,916
Well, it's personal
to me, Lindsey.
623
00:22:54,958 --> 00:22:57,585
(both scream)
624
00:22:57,627 --> 00:23:01,006
(both whimpering)
625
00:23:01,047 --> 00:23:02,882
Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!
Ow, ow, ow!
626
00:23:02,924 --> 00:23:04,759
I'm sorry, Connie.
I have to cut this short.
627
00:23:04,801 --> 00:23:06,886
Tomorrow, we'll talk
about your problems.
628
00:23:06,928 --> 00:23:09,639
Okay, time-out!
This has gone far enough!
629
00:23:09,681 --> 00:23:11,224
TABITHA:
Hey. We're home.
630
00:23:11,266 --> 00:23:12,767
(grunts)
And we got another tree.
631
00:23:12,809 --> 00:23:14,019
A real one.
632
00:23:14,060 --> 00:23:15,061
(all gasp)
633
00:23:15,103 --> 00:23:16,479
Um, upstairs now.
634
00:23:16,521 --> 00:23:17,897
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
635
00:23:17,939 --> 00:23:19,357
-(both grunting)
-CAROL: Push it. No, no, pull.
636
00:23:19,399 --> 00:23:20,483
-Go, go, go, go, go.
-Push it up.
637
00:23:20,525 --> 00:23:22,068
-(grunts, whoops)
-Pull. No, okay.
638
00:23:22,110 --> 00:23:24,154
-To the right.
-How come I have the heavy end?
639
00:23:24,195 --> 00:23:26,072
CAROL: Because you're young
and strong, honey.
640
00:23:26,114 --> 00:23:27,449
Little bit more.
641
00:23:27,490 --> 00:23:28,616
-Me first!
-(grunts)
642
00:23:28,658 --> 00:23:29,909
-CAROL: Come on.
-Get off.
643
00:23:29,951 --> 00:23:31,745
-Tim? Ted?
-Mom.
644
00:23:31,786 --> 00:23:33,121
Get the cord. Get the cord.
645
00:23:33,163 --> 00:23:34,414
Get the cord,
get the cord, get the cord!
646
00:23:34,456 --> 00:23:36,124
You just can't disappear.
647
00:23:36,166 --> 00:23:37,459
You need a cover story.
648
00:23:37,500 --> 00:23:38,960
-TED: Ow!
-Oh, right.
649
00:23:39,002 --> 00:23:40,086
My soft spot.
650
00:23:40,128 --> 00:23:41,254
CAROL:
Where are you guys?
651
00:23:41,296 --> 00:23:42,464
Uh, uh, tell her
you're packing.
652
00:23:42,505 --> 00:23:45,300
We're upstairs, uh, packing.
653
00:23:45,342 --> 00:23:46,760
-Packing? For what?
-(Tabitha yells)
654
00:23:46,801 --> 00:23:48,511
Ooh. You're going on
a brother bonding trip.
655
00:23:48,553 --> 00:23:51,097
-We're going on
a brother bonding trip. -Ow!
656
00:23:51,139 --> 00:23:52,724
Now?
657
00:23:52,766 --> 00:23:54,392
But, Tim, your parents
are coming tomorrow.
658
00:23:54,434 --> 00:23:56,102
They can help out.
659
00:23:56,144 --> 00:23:57,979
Yeah, they could help out.
660
00:23:58,021 --> 00:24:00,899
What... No, you can't leave me
alone with your parents.
661
00:24:00,940 --> 00:24:02,567
-(Tina yells, laughs)
-Oh, Tina!
662
00:24:02,609 --> 00:24:05,236
(grunts)
What are you doing?
663
00:24:05,278 --> 00:24:06,738
(both grunting)
664
00:24:06,780 --> 00:24:08,948
All right, you know what?
You're going to baby jail.
665
00:24:08,990 --> 00:24:10,784
-Oh, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no! -Tabitha!
666
00:24:10,825 --> 00:24:12,285
-CAROL: Oh, honey, I'm sorry.
-TABITHA: A little help here.
667
00:24:12,327 --> 00:24:13,745
CAROL:
Honey, hold it up. Hold it up.
668
00:24:13,787 --> 00:24:15,455
(deep voice):
This is Ted Templeton, a man.
669
00:24:15,497 --> 00:24:17,165
You can go ahead and take off.
I have urgent family business.
670
00:24:17,207 --> 00:24:19,376
-CAROL: To the right, honey.
-Yes, I have a family.
671
00:24:19,417 --> 00:24:21,294
-Tim, I'm coming up there.
-(Tina gasps)
672
00:24:21,336 --> 00:24:23,254
Yeah, we need to talk.
673
00:24:23,296 --> 00:24:24,923
TABITHA:
Hey, Mom?
674
00:24:24,964 --> 00:24:26,132
Oh! Tina!
675
00:24:26,174 --> 00:24:27,550
(squeals, laughs)
676
00:24:27,592 --> 00:24:29,594
Put that down.
Put that down. Put that down.
677
00:24:29,636 --> 00:24:30,970
-Put that down. Put that down.
-Tina!
678
00:24:31,012 --> 00:24:33,807
-Put that down! Get back here!
-(laughing)
679
00:24:33,848 --> 00:24:36,309
Tina, stop! (grunting)
680
00:24:36,351 --> 00:24:38,436
CAROL:
What has gotten into you?
681
00:24:38,478 --> 00:24:40,146
-Time for us to go!
-(grunts)
682
00:24:40,188 --> 00:24:41,648
-What? Now?
-TED: Yeah.
683
00:24:41,690 --> 00:24:44,526
-My helicopter's double-parked.
-Bye!
684
00:24:44,567 --> 00:24:46,695
-Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
So soon? -Oh, no.
685
00:24:46,736 --> 00:24:48,822
-(both scream)
-(wind whistling)
686
00:24:48,863 --> 00:24:51,700
-(helicopter whirring)
-(panting)
687
00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:54,869
What... Did they really
just leave?
688
00:24:54,911 --> 00:24:55,995
Yep.
689
00:24:56,037 --> 00:24:57,872
-Hide!
-(Ted and Tim whimpering)
690
00:24:57,914 --> 00:25:00,917
(groans)
I got to lose this baby fat.
691
00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:02,544
(Carol sighs)
692
00:25:02,585 --> 00:25:04,671
Tina! What is your problem?
693
00:25:04,713 --> 00:25:06,840
(Tina laughing)
694
00:25:06,881 --> 00:25:08,925
* *
695
00:25:10,677 --> 00:25:12,429
CAROL: Now, you're gonna
wake up tomorrow
696
00:25:12,470 --> 00:25:14,055
and be good, Tina.
697
00:25:14,097 --> 00:25:15,390
No more devil baby.
698
00:25:15,432 --> 00:25:16,683
Deal?
699
00:25:16,725 --> 00:25:19,019
-(coos)
-Okay.
700
00:25:21,146 --> 00:25:23,064
(both gasping for air)
701
00:25:23,106 --> 00:25:24,232
(both scream)
702
00:25:24,274 --> 00:25:25,483
Ew.
703
00:25:25,525 --> 00:25:26,943
(both scream)
704
00:25:26,985 --> 00:25:29,195
-(chiming) -Thanks so much
for coming in, ladies.
705
00:25:29,237 --> 00:25:30,530
Would you like some fruit?
706
00:25:30,572 --> 00:25:31,573
Mm. Ow!
707
00:25:31,614 --> 00:25:32,574
What was... Hey!
708
00:25:32,615 --> 00:25:34,159
Uh, can we get on with this?
709
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:36,369
(grunts, groans)
710
00:25:36,411 --> 00:25:38,038
I miss my teeth.
711
00:25:38,079 --> 00:25:40,081
I've decided who's going
on the mission.
712
00:25:40,123 --> 00:25:41,332
Thank you. I accept.
713
00:25:41,374 --> 00:25:42,417
Both of you.
714
00:25:42,459 --> 00:25:43,960
-Yes!
-No.
715
00:25:44,002 --> 00:25:45,712
BabyCorp wants to get
the team back together, huh?
716
00:25:45,754 --> 00:25:46,838
(laughs):
No.
717
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,214
They think that's
a terrible idea.
718
00:25:48,256 --> 00:25:49,382
Of course they do.
719
00:25:49,424 --> 00:25:51,217
Well, I'm the boss, applesauce.
720
00:25:51,259 --> 00:25:54,220
And I think you two are better
together than you are apart.
721
00:25:54,262 --> 00:25:57,515
Well, I work alone--
or at least not with him.
722
00:25:57,557 --> 00:25:59,559
Hey. There's no "I" in "team."
723
00:25:59,601 --> 00:26:01,561
Actually, there's no "U"
in "team," either,
724
00:26:01,603 --> 00:26:03,772
-but there is an "M-E."
-T-E-A-M...
725
00:26:03,813 --> 00:26:05,732
But teamwork doesn't seem work.
726
00:26:05,774 --> 00:26:08,109
Ah. If you want something
done right, do it yourself.
727
00:26:08,151 --> 00:26:10,653
-We're all in it together.
-Every man for himself.
728
00:26:10,695 --> 00:26:12,405
One is the loneliest number.
729
00:26:12,447 --> 00:26:14,282
-The ayes have it.
-We the people!
730
00:26:14,324 --> 00:26:16,159
Aha!
731
00:26:17,452 --> 00:26:18,745
Oh. So sorry.
732
00:26:18,787 --> 00:26:20,163
(whispers):
Okay. Good night.
733
00:26:20,205 --> 00:26:21,581
Whew.
734
00:26:21,623 --> 00:26:23,708
Guess we'll just have to
melt down your big old statue
735
00:26:23,750 --> 00:26:25,585
and turn it into
participation trophies.
736
00:26:25,627 --> 00:26:27,420
Please, no,
don't hurt my statue.
737
00:26:27,462 --> 00:26:30,507
Now, we have secret intel
738
00:26:30,548 --> 00:26:35,637
that Dr. Armstrong leaves his
office every morning at 11:15.
739
00:26:35,679 --> 00:26:37,138
You need to sneak in there,
740
00:26:37,180 --> 00:26:39,391
plant these
surveillance devices,
741
00:26:39,432 --> 00:26:41,434
and report back to me.
742
00:26:41,476 --> 00:26:42,560
Oh, man, this is so cool.
743
00:26:42,602 --> 00:26:43,728
(echoing over speaker):
Testing.
744
00:26:43,770 --> 00:26:45,105
* Strangers in the night... *
745
00:26:45,146 --> 00:26:47,607
Now, I've arranged
for a school bus
746
00:26:47,649 --> 00:26:49,943
to be here at 8:00 a.m. sharp!
747
00:26:49,984 --> 00:26:51,569
-Thank you, Connie.
-CONNIE: Nighty night.
748
00:26:51,611 --> 00:26:53,071
Do not be late.
749
00:26:53,113 --> 00:26:54,322
Got it.
750
00:26:54,364 --> 00:26:56,282
Easy-breezy, taco-peasy, boys.
751
00:26:56,324 --> 00:26:58,159
Let's get some sleep!
752
00:26:58,201 --> 00:27:00,120
(snoring)
753
00:27:04,290 --> 00:27:06,334
(coos softly)
754
00:27:08,461 --> 00:27:10,714
* *
755
00:27:20,015 --> 00:27:22,183
CAROL:
Hey, what's the matter?
756
00:27:23,685 --> 00:27:24,936
TABITHA:
It's nothing.
757
00:27:24,978 --> 00:27:26,312
CAROL:
Oh, sweetie, don't worry.
758
00:27:26,354 --> 00:27:27,647
I'm sure your dad will be back
759
00:27:27,689 --> 00:27:29,315
in time to see you
in the pageant.
760
00:27:29,357 --> 00:27:30,692
TABITHA:
That's okay.
761
00:27:30,734 --> 00:27:32,068
CAROL: What?
Don't you want him to come?
762
00:27:32,110 --> 00:27:34,654
-TABITHA: I guess.
-CAROL: Of course you do.
763
00:27:34,696 --> 00:27:36,614
Now, go back to sleep.
764
00:27:36,656 --> 00:27:38,033
TABITHA:
Good night, Mom.
765
00:27:38,074 --> 00:27:40,368
CAROL:
Good night, sweetie.
766
00:27:47,876 --> 00:27:49,919
(coos softly)
767
00:27:53,465 --> 00:27:55,717
* *
768
00:27:59,721 --> 00:28:01,181
CAROL:
Don't you want him to come?
769
00:28:01,222 --> 00:28:03,099
-TABITHA: I guess.
-(gasping)
770
00:28:03,141 --> 00:28:04,392
(screams)
771
00:28:04,434 --> 00:28:06,770
Don't you think I'm
a little old for that now?
772
00:28:06,811 --> 00:28:09,522
I think it's time
we both grow up.
773
00:28:09,564 --> 00:28:11,107
-(grunts)
-(thunder crashes)
774
00:28:11,149 --> 00:28:12,901
(gavel slamming)
775
00:28:14,069 --> 00:28:16,613
The trial of
Timothy Leslie Templeton
776
00:28:16,654 --> 00:28:18,031
is now in session.
777
00:28:18,073 --> 00:28:19,407
-Ha! Leslie.
-(laughter)
778
00:28:19,449 --> 00:28:21,534
Trial? Wait, what...
what are the charges?
779
00:28:21,576 --> 00:28:22,869
Fraud.
780
00:28:22,911 --> 00:28:25,538
Claiming to be
the world's best dad.
781
00:28:25,580 --> 00:28:26,998
-But I never said...
-Exhibit A.
782
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:29,209
-Oh, come on. That was a gift.
-(gallery gasping)
783
00:28:29,250 --> 00:28:32,253
I suggest you let
your attorney do the talking.
784
00:28:32,295 --> 00:28:34,422
(gasps) Oh, no.
785
00:28:34,464 --> 00:28:36,966
Back in my day, you had to
earn one of these babies.
786
00:28:37,008 --> 00:28:38,259
-Dad, what? I did not...
-(gallery gasping)
787
00:28:38,301 --> 00:28:41,054
His best friend was
an alarm clock.
788
00:28:41,096 --> 00:28:41,846
Mom.
789
00:28:41,888 --> 00:28:44,516
(groans) He broke my arm.
790
00:28:44,557 --> 00:28:46,059
No, I didn't!
It was my brother.
791
00:28:46,101 --> 00:28:47,227
Objection, Your Honor.
792
00:28:47,268 --> 00:28:48,687
Sustained.
793
00:28:48,728 --> 00:28:50,313
We the jury find
the defendant...
794
00:28:50,355 --> 00:28:51,815
ALL:
A failure!
795
00:28:51,856 --> 00:28:53,608
Tabitha, will you please
help me out?
796
00:28:53,650 --> 00:28:54,984
Whoa!
797
00:28:55,026 --> 00:28:57,404
Dad, the homework,
it's just too much.
798
00:28:57,445 --> 00:28:58,571
-Whoa!
-Tabitha!
799
00:28:58,613 --> 00:28:59,781
-Time's up.
-(alarm ringing)
800
00:28:59,823 --> 00:29:02,367
-Wait. No!
-Save me, Daddy! Save me!
801
00:29:02,409 --> 00:29:04,619
(screaming)
802
00:29:04,661 --> 00:29:06,204
(yells, gasps)
803
00:29:06,246 --> 00:29:07,747
(sighs)
804
00:29:07,789 --> 00:29:10,750
-Oh, man. That was crazy.
-(snoring)
805
00:29:10,792 --> 00:29:12,627
(both yelling)
806
00:29:12,669 --> 00:29:14,170
-We overslept! We overslept?
-(gasping)
807
00:29:14,212 --> 00:29:15,880
-We overslept.
-Wake up, little halflings!
808
00:29:15,922 --> 00:29:18,049
-Wake up! What year is it?
-(alarm ringing)
809
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:20,844
Oh, no.
810
00:29:20,885 --> 00:29:22,595
This is bad. No.
811
00:29:22,637 --> 00:29:24,264
No! No.
812
00:29:24,305 --> 00:29:25,598
(yells) Get up.
813
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:26,933
Get up. We got to go.
814
00:29:26,975 --> 00:29:28,810
Come on.
We're gonna be late for... Oh!
815
00:29:28,852 --> 00:29:30,103
I'm gonna email it to you.
816
00:29:30,145 --> 00:29:31,604
(grunts) What's going on?
817
00:29:31,646 --> 00:29:33,898
Ah, I forgot to set Wizzie
for daylight savings!
818
00:29:33,940 --> 00:29:36,943
-What?!
-Daylight can't be saved, Tim.
819
00:29:36,985 --> 00:29:39,237
Oh, I got to get the plant
and the bug we got to plant.
820
00:29:39,279 --> 00:29:41,114
-Grab whatever. We got to go.
-Don't panic. Do not panic.
821
00:29:41,156 --> 00:29:42,657
-Ow. (groans)
-Godspeed, boys.
822
00:29:42,699 --> 00:29:43,783
Let's roll.
823
00:29:43,825 --> 00:29:46,286
Whoa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa...!
824
00:29:46,327 --> 00:29:48,413
(grunting)
825
00:29:49,748 --> 00:29:51,082
-(Tim screams)
-Upsies.
826
00:29:51,124 --> 00:29:53,543
-I need upsies...!
-Oh!
827
00:29:53,585 --> 00:29:54,961
-(Ted yells)
-TIM: Get dressed.
828
00:29:55,003 --> 00:29:57,714
(both grunting and groaning)
829
00:29:57,756 --> 00:29:59,341
What have you done to me?!
830
00:29:59,382 --> 00:30:01,301
No, really?
What, are we going sailing?
831
00:30:01,343 --> 00:30:03,470
Oh, no.
No, no, it's leaving.
832
00:30:03,511 --> 00:30:04,804
(both yell)
833
00:30:04,846 --> 00:30:06,723
(grunts, whimpers)
834
00:30:06,765 --> 00:30:08,141
Wait, no, no. Stop!
835
00:30:08,183 --> 00:30:10,310
Stop, stop, stop. Come back!
836
00:30:10,352 --> 00:30:11,478
Ahoy!
837
00:30:11,519 --> 00:30:12,812
Come back!
838
00:30:12,854 --> 00:30:14,564
(panting)
839
00:30:14,606 --> 00:30:16,024
Great, matey.
840
00:30:16,066 --> 00:30:17,609
What are we gonna do now?
841
00:30:18,777 --> 00:30:21,237
(whistling)
842
00:30:21,279 --> 00:30:23,365
* *
843
00:30:26,534 --> 00:30:28,578
(neighing)
844
00:30:33,541 --> 00:30:35,919
(slow-motion):
Oh, no!
845
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:37,921
(continues whistling)
846
00:30:38,713 --> 00:30:39,673
(whinnies)
847
00:30:39,714 --> 00:30:42,342
Precious, my noble steed.
848
00:30:42,384 --> 00:30:45,512
We must not be late
for our first day of school.
849
00:30:47,806 --> 00:30:49,641
Oh, gross.
850
00:30:49,683 --> 00:30:51,351
-Huh?
-(Tim screaming)
851
00:30:51,393 --> 00:30:53,687
Tallyho, Precious!
852
00:30:53,728 --> 00:30:56,022
(Tim continues screaming)
853
00:30:58,233 --> 00:30:59,818
This pony hates me. Oh!
854
00:30:59,859 --> 00:31:01,277
It's not that
she hates you, Tim.
855
00:31:01,319 --> 00:31:02,862
She just doesn't respect you.
856
00:31:02,904 --> 00:31:05,323
(Tim screams, whimpers)
857
00:31:05,365 --> 00:31:07,367
(horns honking)
858
00:31:07,409 --> 00:31:08,743
Go left! Go left!
859
00:31:08,785 --> 00:31:10,704
I'm gonna go
where navigation says.
860
00:31:10,745 --> 00:31:11,913
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Turn left.
861
00:31:11,955 --> 00:31:13,289
Thank you, navigation.
862
00:31:13,331 --> 00:31:14,916
-TIM: Whoa!
-AUTOMATED VOICE: Turn right.
863
00:31:14,958 --> 00:31:16,584
-(people screaming)
-TIM: Sorry.
864
00:31:16,626 --> 00:31:19,004
AUTOMATED VOICE: Turn left.
Proceed on the current route.
865
00:31:20,422 --> 00:31:22,090
TED:
Yeehaw!
866
00:31:22,132 --> 00:31:23,800
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
867
00:31:23,842 --> 00:31:25,635
Hold on to your holster.
868
00:31:25,677 --> 00:31:26,928
-Hyah!
-(yells)
869
00:31:26,970 --> 00:31:28,763
(cell phone buzzing)
870
00:31:28,805 --> 00:31:30,765
(grunts)
Oh, no. It's Carol!
871
00:31:30,807 --> 00:31:31,891
Don't answer it.
872
00:31:31,933 --> 00:31:33,059
-Hi.
-CAROL: Oh, Tim.
873
00:31:33,101 --> 00:31:34,310
How's your bonding trip?
874
00:31:34,352 --> 00:31:36,062
Uh... Whoa!
875
00:31:36,104 --> 00:31:37,397
Whoa. Slow down.
876
00:31:37,439 --> 00:31:40,191
How... is... your...
877
00:31:40,233 --> 00:31:42,110
-bonding trip?
-Aah! Whoa.
878
00:31:42,902 --> 00:31:44,738
(screams) You're here!
879
00:31:44,779 --> 00:31:46,698
-Oh, no.
-TIM: I mean, um,
880
00:31:46,740 --> 00:31:48,074
I wish you were here.
881
00:31:48,116 --> 00:31:49,325
Oh, we miss you, too.
882
00:31:49,367 --> 00:31:50,410
Don't we, girls?
883
00:31:50,452 --> 00:31:51,870
We're, uh...
884
00:31:51,911 --> 00:31:53,413
We're, uh, rebooting
our relationship
885
00:31:53,455 --> 00:31:55,498
and, uh, restoring the
closeness that we once felt.
886
00:31:55,540 --> 00:31:57,917
-That's so great.
-We've got to go. (chuckles)
887
00:31:57,959 --> 00:31:59,127
CAROL:
Where are you?
888
00:31:59,169 --> 00:32:00,587
-Uh, a hockey game.
-Hey!
889
00:32:00,628 --> 00:32:02,172
He shoots, he scores!
890
00:32:02,213 --> 00:32:03,465
He scores! He scores!
891
00:32:03,506 --> 00:32:05,091
Ladies and gentlemen,
he scores!
892
00:32:05,133 --> 00:32:06,676
-* Busted... *
-* Busted... *
893
00:32:06,718 --> 00:32:07,844
-* Busted. *
-(sirens wail)
894
00:32:07,886 --> 00:32:09,679
Is that the police?
895
00:32:10,764 --> 00:32:12,098
Uh, no, not the police.
896
00:32:12,140 --> 00:32:13,933
It's, uh...
it's a hockey alarm.
897
00:32:13,975 --> 00:32:15,143
Faster, Tim.
898
00:32:15,185 --> 00:32:16,895
I ain't going back
to the clink!
899
00:32:16,936 --> 00:32:18,355
Now, I just wanted
to remind you
900
00:32:18,396 --> 00:32:20,190
that Tabitha's pageant
is tomorrow night.
901
00:32:20,231 --> 00:32:22,025
You have to be there.
902
00:32:22,067 --> 00:32:25,779
Uh, I will be there
in one shape or another.
903
00:32:25,820 --> 00:32:26,946
(Ted grunts)
904
00:32:26,988 --> 00:32:29,115
-You promise?
-I promise.
905
00:32:29,157 --> 00:32:30,533
And what about Ted?
906
00:32:30,575 --> 00:32:31,951
Happy holidays, coppers.
907
00:32:31,993 --> 00:32:34,913
You're never gonna
take me alive, see?
908
00:32:34,954 --> 00:32:36,206
Uh, he's busy.
909
00:32:36,247 --> 00:32:37,957
What are you doing?
It's the cops.
910
00:32:37,999 --> 00:32:39,459
-(Ted laughs)
-Sorry, Officers.
911
00:32:39,501 --> 00:32:41,378
TED: Santa's got something
for everybody.
912
00:32:41,419 --> 00:32:42,462
TIM:
Sorry.
913
00:32:42,504 --> 00:32:44,589
* *
914
00:32:48,009 --> 00:32:49,135
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
915
00:32:49,177 --> 00:32:50,637
(Tim screams, Ted laughs)
916
00:32:50,679 --> 00:32:52,305
Oh, my God! It's so real!
917
00:32:52,347 --> 00:32:54,307
It's so real! It's so real!
918
00:32:54,349 --> 00:32:55,934
(Tim screaming over phone)
919
00:32:55,975 --> 00:32:57,769
-Tim?
-(Tabitha speaks Mandarin)
920
00:32:57,811 --> 00:32:58,937
(people screaming)
921
00:32:58,978 --> 00:32:59,896
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
922
00:32:59,938 --> 00:33:01,064
TIM:
Left! Left! Left!
923
00:33:01,106 --> 00:33:02,357
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
924
00:33:02,399 --> 00:33:03,692
TIM: Right, right,
right, right, right!
925
00:33:03,733 --> 00:33:05,110
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
926
00:33:05,151 --> 00:33:06,986
And now the moment
we've all waited for!
927
00:33:07,028 --> 00:33:09,364
(people screaming)
928
00:33:11,741 --> 00:33:13,034
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Proceed on the current route.
929
00:33:13,076 --> 00:33:14,202
-(screams)
-See, Tim?
930
00:33:14,244 --> 00:33:15,704
-(blowing)
-Always trust... Holy...
931
00:33:15,745 --> 00:33:17,122
-(Tim screaming)
-CAROL: Tim?
932
00:33:17,163 --> 00:33:18,415
TIM:
Uh, Carol?
933
00:33:18,456 --> 00:33:20,125
You're breaking up.
I'm losing you.
934
00:33:20,166 --> 00:33:21,584
No, honey, I can hear you fine.
935
00:33:21,626 --> 00:33:23,837
-See you at the pageant.
Got to go. Bye. -Okay.
936
00:33:23,878 --> 00:33:24,963
(yells)
937
00:33:25,005 --> 00:33:27,757
-(screams) Whoa!
-Sorry.
938
00:33:27,799 --> 00:33:29,175
(yells)
939
00:33:29,217 --> 00:33:30,260
(Jimbo whimpering)
940
00:33:30,301 --> 00:33:32,262
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
941
00:33:32,303 --> 00:33:34,681
-(screams)
-It's too real! It's too real!
942
00:33:34,723 --> 00:33:37,183
-(clamoring)
-(siren wailing)
943
00:33:37,225 --> 00:33:40,812
(screaming)
944
00:33:40,854 --> 00:33:43,898
TED:
Tallyho, Precious!
945
00:33:43,940 --> 00:33:45,191
(gasps)
946
00:33:46,151 --> 00:33:48,653
No, no, no, tally...
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
947
00:33:48,695 --> 00:33:50,071
(whimpers)
948
00:33:51,197 --> 00:33:53,700
-(grunts)
-(tires screeching)
949
00:33:53,742 --> 00:33:54,868
-(grunts) Tina!
-Tina!
950
00:33:54,909 --> 00:33:56,036
-(Tim screaming)
-TED: Whoa!
951
00:33:56,077 --> 00:33:57,412
(laughs)
952
00:33:57,454 --> 00:33:59,539
-(screaming)
-TED: Woo-hoo!
953
00:33:59,581 --> 00:34:01,791
Whoa! (laughs)
954
00:34:01,833 --> 00:34:03,877
(Tim panting)
955
00:34:03,918 --> 00:34:05,670
-JIMBO: Tree!
-(siren whoops)
956
00:34:05,712 --> 00:34:07,672
AUTOMATED VOICE: You've arrived
at your destination.
957
00:34:07,714 --> 00:34:10,091
-And with a minute to spare.
-(distant explosion)
958
00:34:10,133 --> 00:34:12,844
Oh. Huh.
959
00:34:12,886 --> 00:34:14,012
I'll send them a check.
960
00:34:14,054 --> 00:34:15,138
(both chuckling)
961
00:34:15,180 --> 00:34:16,431
Oh, that was fun.
962
00:34:16,473 --> 00:34:17,891
You did it.
963
00:34:17,932 --> 00:34:19,225
We did it.
964
00:34:19,267 --> 00:34:20,977
I guess we did.
965
00:34:21,019 --> 00:34:22,812
I was talking about
me and Precious.
966
00:34:22,854 --> 00:34:24,814
-Oh.
-Isn't that right, baby?
967
00:34:24,856 --> 00:34:26,024
Yeah. Right.
968
00:34:26,066 --> 00:34:27,817
-Get down!
-(yells)
969
00:34:29,819 --> 00:34:32,113
* *
970
00:34:33,782 --> 00:34:35,825
(kids chattering)
971
00:34:42,457 --> 00:34:45,043
Whoa.
This place even looks evil.
972
00:34:45,085 --> 00:34:47,003
TED:
It's just a school.
973
00:34:47,045 --> 00:34:48,755
You're overreacting.
974
00:34:48,797 --> 00:34:50,006
And so is BabyCorp.
975
00:34:50,048 --> 00:34:51,299
No, I'm telling you,
976
00:34:51,341 --> 00:34:53,218
this school is stressing
Tabitha out.
977
00:34:53,259 --> 00:34:54,969
Tabitha can handle it.
978
00:34:55,011 --> 00:34:57,097
She's a real chip
off the old block.
979
00:34:57,138 --> 00:34:59,099
-Wait, who's the block?
-I'm the block.
980
00:34:59,140 --> 00:35:00,934
Well, you can't be the block.
I'm the block.
981
00:35:00,975 --> 00:35:02,435
Then start acting like a block.
982
00:35:02,477 --> 00:35:04,270
Wh-What does that mean?
I'm the block.
983
00:35:04,312 --> 00:35:06,147
-I've always been the block.
-Yeah. Not even close.
984
00:35:06,189 --> 00:35:07,607
TIM:
All I do is block.
985
00:35:07,649 --> 00:35:09,192
I wake up in the morning,
I block.
986
00:35:09,234 --> 00:35:11,069
-(kids grunting)
-I go to sleep, blocking.
987
00:35:11,111 --> 00:35:13,446
-I'm the block.
-Tim, enough.
988
00:35:14,406 --> 00:35:16,032
-I'm the block.
-No, you're not! Stop it!
989
00:35:16,074 --> 00:35:17,325
-Shh.
-(whistle blows)
990
00:35:17,367 --> 00:35:18,702
(chuckles) Sweet.
991
00:35:18,743 --> 00:35:20,161
Suckers.
992
00:35:20,203 --> 00:35:22,122
-AUTOMATED VOICE: Children only
beyond this point. -Hey.
993
00:35:22,163 --> 00:35:25,208
No crying is permitted
in the separation zone.
994
00:35:25,250 --> 00:35:26,793
Okay, looks like
we got to split up.
995
00:35:26,835 --> 00:35:28,253
Good. I could use a break.
996
00:35:28,294 --> 00:35:30,380
-TABITHA: Bye, Mom.
-All right, bye, honey.
997
00:35:30,422 --> 00:35:31,965
(gasps, yells)
There's Tabitha.
998
00:35:32,007 --> 00:35:34,342
-I'll see you after school.
-Okay.
999
00:35:34,384 --> 00:35:36,428
(window squeaking)
1000
00:35:37,220 --> 00:35:39,139
TED:
Apparently, there's no "A"
1001
00:35:39,180 --> 00:35:41,349
in "teamwork," either.
1002
00:35:41,391 --> 00:35:42,851
All right, let's boogie.
1003
00:35:42,892 --> 00:35:44,686
(grunts) Not so fast.
1004
00:35:44,728 --> 00:35:47,230
I'm blue. You're yellow.
1005
00:35:47,272 --> 00:35:49,858
(laughing): You're over there
in the choo-choo.
1006
00:35:49,899 --> 00:35:51,484
(raucous laughter)
1007
00:35:51,526 --> 00:35:53,945
Aw. It's full of babies.
1008
00:35:53,987 --> 00:35:55,363
Is it? I didn't notice.
1009
00:35:55,405 --> 00:35:57,824
(laughing):
Just kidding. It's hilarious.
1010
00:35:57,866 --> 00:35:59,451
Uh, wait. Your tie's crooked.
1011
00:35:59,492 --> 00:36:00,910
-(fingers snap)
-Okay, Tim, focus.
1012
00:36:00,952 --> 00:36:03,663
We'll meet outside
Armstrong's office at 11:15.
1013
00:36:03,705 --> 00:36:05,665
We'll sneak in,
and we'll plant the bugs.
1014
00:36:05,707 --> 00:36:06,833
Are you focused?
1015
00:36:06,875 --> 00:36:08,043
Hey, what the...
1016
00:36:08,084 --> 00:36:10,086
-Oh, I am focused, all right.
-No, no.
1017
00:36:10,128 --> 00:36:11,421
I'm not yellow. I'm blue.
1018
00:36:11,463 --> 00:36:13,506
11:30. Stick to the plan.
1019
00:36:13,548 --> 00:36:14,549
11:15.
1020
00:36:14,591 --> 00:36:16,551
15. Got it.
The block is focused.
1021
00:36:16,593 --> 00:36:19,387
-I'm blue! Aah! I'm blue.
-(babies laughing)
1022
00:36:20,347 --> 00:36:22,349
Don't you understand?
I'm blue!
1023
00:36:22,390 --> 00:36:24,351
ARMSTRONG (over speakers):
Welcome, children.
1024
00:36:24,392 --> 00:36:25,727
Willkommen.
1025
00:36:25,769 --> 00:36:27,187
Bienvenue.
1026
00:36:27,228 --> 00:36:28,355
Annyeonghaseyo.
1027
00:36:28,396 --> 00:36:30,231
And buenos días.
1028
00:36:30,273 --> 00:36:34,194
Thank you for choosing
to be excellent.
1029
00:36:34,235 --> 00:36:35,737
-Please don't touch me.
-(babies laughing)
1030
00:36:35,779 --> 00:36:38,114
This is some
ridiculous mistake.
1031
00:36:38,156 --> 00:36:39,616
I'm blue! I'm blue!
1032
00:36:39,657 --> 00:36:41,368
* The wheels on the bus
go pi R-squared *
1033
00:36:41,409 --> 00:36:43,703
-* Circumference all around. *
-Yes.
1034
00:36:46,915 --> 00:36:48,208
TIM:
Hello.
1035
00:36:48,249 --> 00:36:50,001
Uh, hello.
1036
00:36:50,043 --> 00:36:51,711
Nice plant.
1037
00:36:51,753 --> 00:36:54,214
This is
my emotional support plant.
1038
00:36:54,255 --> 00:36:56,049
Hi. I-I'm new here.
1039
00:36:56,091 --> 00:37:00,261
Said nihonium to the other
elements in the periodic table.
1040
00:37:00,303 --> 00:37:02,180
-Ooh.
-(laughter)
1041
00:37:02,222 --> 00:37:03,723
Okay.
1042
00:37:03,765 --> 00:37:05,392
Can't sit here.
1043
00:37:05,433 --> 00:37:07,227
Or here. Or there.
1044
00:37:07,268 --> 00:37:08,728
(yells)
1045
00:37:08,770 --> 00:37:12,524
Seating position is
determined by class rank.
1046
00:37:12,565 --> 00:37:14,651
We can't possibly
include your data,
1047
00:37:14,693 --> 00:37:17,070
given that the rigor
of your previous school
1048
00:37:17,112 --> 00:37:18,988
is an unknown variable.
1049
00:37:19,030 --> 00:37:20,240
-STUDENTS: Ooh.
-(laughs)
1050
00:37:20,281 --> 00:37:21,866
-Sick burn, Nathan.
-(grunts)
1051
00:37:21,908 --> 00:37:23,118
-(groans)
-Ow.
1052
00:37:23,159 --> 00:37:24,244
Here.
1053
00:37:24,285 --> 00:37:26,413
-You can take my seat.
-(sighs)
1054
00:37:26,454 --> 00:37:28,873
I'm so proud of you.
1055
00:37:28,915 --> 00:37:30,875
I mean... thanks.
1056
00:37:30,917 --> 00:37:32,377
Okay...
1057
00:37:32,419 --> 00:37:33,920
(school bell rings)
1058
00:37:33,962 --> 00:37:35,255
ARMSTRONG:
Good morning.
1059
00:37:35,296 --> 00:37:36,673
STUDENTS:
Good morning, Dr. Armstrong!
1060
00:37:36,715 --> 00:37:39,050
(chuckles)
Very warm welcome. Thank you.
1061
00:37:39,092 --> 00:37:40,385
Huh?
1062
00:37:40,427 --> 00:37:42,429
As you can see,
we've got a new colleague
1063
00:37:42,470 --> 00:37:44,222
joining us today.
1064
00:37:44,264 --> 00:37:45,724
-Ooh.
-Hello.
1065
00:37:45,765 --> 00:37:47,517
New colleague, why don't you
introduce yourself.
1066
00:37:47,559 --> 00:37:50,603
Uh, my name's Ti... um, Marcos.
1067
00:37:50,645 --> 00:37:53,023
-Hmm.
-Marcos Lightspeed.
1068
00:37:53,064 --> 00:37:55,608
Marcos Lightspeed.
1069
00:37:55,650 --> 00:37:58,194
Yeah. Colorful, characterful,
and I like it.
1070
00:37:58,236 --> 00:37:59,821
-In any case...
-(gasps)
1071
00:37:59,863 --> 00:38:02,449
-...welcome, Marcos,
to Blue Unit. -(gasps)
1072
00:38:02,490 --> 00:38:04,242
Our most advanced class.
1073
00:38:04,284 --> 00:38:07,078
Ooh, this is rarefied air
1074
00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:08,413
-we're breathing.
-(groans)
1075
00:38:08,455 --> 00:38:10,331
Here at The Acorn Center,
we believe
1076
00:38:10,373 --> 00:38:12,417
that all competition is...
1077
00:38:12,459 --> 00:38:14,961
STUDENTS:
Healthy competition.
1078
00:38:15,003 --> 00:38:17,422
(babies yelling, laughing)
1079
00:38:17,464 --> 00:38:19,841
(noisemakers blaring)
1080
00:38:23,511 --> 00:38:26,890
I'm trapped
in the dum-dum holding tank.
1081
00:38:26,931 --> 00:38:30,268
(gasps)
I'm having a panic attack.
1082
00:38:30,310 --> 00:38:32,687
There must be
a way out of here.
1083
00:38:35,690 --> 00:38:37,817
Something doesn't smell right.
1084
00:38:37,859 --> 00:38:39,944
(sniffs) Blueberry.
1085
00:38:39,986 --> 00:38:41,696
(laughing)
1086
00:38:41,738 --> 00:38:43,907
(whispers):
I have to get out of here.
1087
00:38:43,948 --> 00:38:45,158
Hi.
1088
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:46,659
Don't look at me.
1089
00:38:46,701 --> 00:38:48,661
-Okay.
-(baby laughing)
1090
00:38:48,703 --> 00:38:50,955
And our first subject
today is...
1091
00:38:50,997 --> 00:38:53,083
No fractions, no fractions,
no fractions. Whoa!
1092
00:38:54,084 --> 00:38:55,835
Particle physics.
1093
00:38:55,877 --> 00:38:57,003
Yes! What?
1094
00:38:57,045 --> 00:38:58,129
Yes! (laughs)
1095
00:38:58,171 --> 00:38:59,631
Who knows which scientist
1096
00:38:59,673 --> 00:39:01,883
first theorized
that the universe has a limit
1097
00:39:01,925 --> 00:39:04,594
beyond which
the laws of physics break down?
1098
00:39:04,636 --> 00:39:06,179
(students clamoring)
1099
00:39:06,221 --> 00:39:07,931
Wow. Everybody seems to know.
1100
00:39:07,972 --> 00:39:11,434
-(sighs, gasps)
-Señor Lightspeed.
1101
00:39:11,476 --> 00:39:14,979
Um, Dr. Flam... baisley?
1102
00:39:15,021 --> 00:39:17,857
-(buzzer sounds)
-Oh, that's the wrong answer.
1103
00:39:17,899 --> 00:39:20,694
His brain sure doesn't move
at light speed.
1104
00:39:20,735 --> 00:39:21,861
(laughter)
1105
00:39:21,903 --> 00:39:23,488
-ARMSTRONG: Uh, okay.
-I know, right?
1106
00:39:23,530 --> 00:39:25,365
-Anybody else?
-Right here.
1107
00:39:25,407 --> 00:39:26,783
-Max Planck.
-(bell dings)
1108
00:39:26,825 --> 00:39:28,284
ARMSTRONG:
That's correct.
1109
00:39:28,326 --> 00:39:29,703
Tabitha has set the bar.
1110
00:39:29,744 --> 00:39:31,413
First one on the board.
Ding, ding, ding.
1111
00:39:31,454 --> 00:39:33,540
Way to go, Tabitha.
1112
00:39:33,581 --> 00:39:36,042
You're going down, Templeton.
1113
00:39:36,084 --> 00:39:37,502
Bring it on, Nathan.
1114
00:39:37,544 --> 00:39:38,712
Yeah, Tabitha. Get him.
1115
00:39:38,753 --> 00:39:41,256
ARMSTRONG:
Next subject.
1116
00:39:41,297 --> 00:39:42,882
Ancient Greek.
1117
00:39:42,924 --> 00:39:45,719
-STUDENTS: Opa!
-Oprah! (chuckles)
1118
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:47,887
-(laughter, babbling)
-Attention.
1119
00:39:47,929 --> 00:39:49,764
Attention, everyone.
1120
00:39:49,806 --> 00:39:52,475
Who wants to play Shawshank?
1121
00:39:52,517 --> 00:39:53,977
-No!
-BABIES: Huh?
1122
00:39:54,811 --> 00:39:57,981
Who wants to go outside
and play?
1123
00:39:58,023 --> 00:40:01,109
-(cheering)
-Does that sound fun? Good.
1124
00:40:01,151 --> 00:40:03,069
Now, anybody have any ideas?
1125
00:40:03,111 --> 00:40:04,404
-BABY: No!
-Come on, people.
1126
00:40:04,446 --> 00:40:05,530
Think, think, think,
think, think.
1127
00:40:05,572 --> 00:40:06,781
We need to think
outside the box.
1128
00:40:06,823 --> 00:40:08,241
-Oh, oh, oh! Me, me! Oh!
-You, Bo-Peep.
1129
00:40:08,283 --> 00:40:11,327
We can build a hot-air balloon
1130
00:40:11,369 --> 00:40:13,288
out of Popsicle sticks
and bubble gum!
1131
00:40:13,329 --> 00:40:14,622
(laughing)
1132
00:40:14,664 --> 00:40:16,332
And how would it fly?
1133
00:40:16,374 --> 00:40:18,251
-Pixie dust!
-(laughing, cheering)
1134
00:40:18,293 --> 00:40:19,794
Get back in the box, Bo-Peep.
1135
00:40:19,836 --> 00:40:22,088
-All the way in?
-All the way in.
1136
00:40:22,130 --> 00:40:24,299
-Yay! -Ooh. Uh, can we get
in the box, too?
1137
00:40:24,341 --> 00:40:26,343
-Can we? Can we?
-BABY: Glue.
1138
00:40:26,384 --> 00:40:28,303
I like glue.
1139
00:40:28,345 --> 00:40:29,512
Who doesn't?
1140
00:40:29,554 --> 00:40:30,972
But we're trying
to brainstorm here.
1141
00:40:31,014 --> 00:40:32,265
Glue's good.
1142
00:40:32,307 --> 00:40:33,975
(laughing wildly)
1143
00:40:34,017 --> 00:40:36,770
-Think, think, think, think,
think, think... -(groans)
1144
00:40:36,811 --> 00:40:39,939
...think, think, think, think,
think, think, think, think!
1145
00:40:39,981 --> 00:40:41,441
Bingo.
1146
00:40:41,483 --> 00:40:42,776
Next subject.
1147
00:40:42,817 --> 00:40:45,445
X is equal
to the derivative of...
1148
00:40:45,487 --> 00:40:46,738
-NATHAN: Ooh, me!
-Itself.
1149
00:40:46,780 --> 00:40:48,406
ARMSTRONG:
Kudos for Tabitha.
1150
00:40:48,448 --> 00:40:49,908
Wow. You knew that?
1151
00:40:49,949 --> 00:40:53,244
The world's leading producer
of bauxite is...
1152
00:40:53,286 --> 00:40:54,746
-NATHAN: Oh!
-Australia.
1153
00:40:54,788 --> 00:40:56,122
ARMSTRONG: Once again,
Tabitha's on the board.
1154
00:40:56,164 --> 00:40:58,375
-Very good. -Yes, Tabitha!
-(applause)
1155
00:40:58,416 --> 00:41:00,001
We got 15 minutes, people.
1156
00:41:00,043 --> 00:41:02,170
The difference
in "try" and "triumph"
1157
00:41:02,212 --> 00:41:03,963
is just a little oomph.
1158
00:41:04,005 --> 00:41:07,092
-BABIES: Oomph!
-Go big or go home.
1159
00:41:07,133 --> 00:41:08,718
Okay. Going home.
1160
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:10,512
-Let's pick up the pace.
-No!
1161
00:41:10,553 --> 00:41:13,556
Hand downs, Norma Rae.
This is my time.
1162
00:41:13,598 --> 00:41:15,725
To be, or not to be?
Tabitha.
1163
00:41:15,767 --> 00:41:17,310
-To be. -That's correct.
-(bell dings)
1164
00:41:17,352 --> 00:41:21,314
Can anyone tell me
the horsepower of a 302 engine?
1165
00:41:21,356 --> 00:41:23,149
-Uh, seven?
-(buzzer sounds)
1166
00:41:23,191 --> 00:41:24,901
-ARMSTRONG: Oh, boy.
-Weak sauce, Nathan.
1167
00:41:24,943 --> 00:41:26,486
-That was weak.
-(groans)
1168
00:41:26,528 --> 00:41:27,737
Tabitha, do you have
an idea about that?
1169
00:41:27,779 --> 00:41:30,323
300 horsepower
with a four-barrel carb.
1170
00:41:30,365 --> 00:41:31,616
-(bell dings) -TIM: Wow.
-(groans)
1171
00:41:31,658 --> 00:41:33,493
-Her dad must be a genius.
-(applause)
1172
00:41:33,535 --> 00:41:36,037
On my signal, unleash heck.
1173
00:41:36,830 --> 00:41:38,957
-Fire!
-(babies grunt)
1174
00:41:39,958 --> 00:41:42,544
-(babies cheering)
-Yes!
1175
00:41:43,795 --> 00:41:45,880
-I found a cure!
-(cheering)
1176
00:41:45,922 --> 00:41:47,674
-(bell dings)
-Yes! Yes! She did it!
1177
00:41:47,716 --> 00:41:48,883
She did it.
1178
00:41:48,925 --> 00:41:50,510
-(students gasp)
-(buzzers sounding)
1179
00:41:50,552 --> 00:41:52,178
STUDENTS:
Marcos!
1180
00:41:52,220 --> 00:41:54,472
I did it. I did it.
1181
00:41:54,514 --> 00:41:56,349
(babies cheering)
1182
00:41:56,391 --> 00:42:00,270
Remember, your size doesn't
determine your strength.
1183
00:42:01,813 --> 00:42:04,190
Well, so far,
it's Tabitha number one
1184
00:42:04,232 --> 00:42:05,692
and everybody else last.
1185
00:42:05,734 --> 00:42:08,361
-(cheering, applause)
-(groans, sobs)
1186
00:42:08,403 --> 00:42:10,989
* *
1187
00:42:15,243 --> 00:42:16,411
Psst. Hey, Tabitha.
1188
00:42:16,453 --> 00:42:17,662
You're really...
1189
00:42:17,704 --> 00:42:20,290
-A geek. I know.
-No.
1190
00:42:20,331 --> 00:42:22,208
You're amazing.
1191
00:42:22,250 --> 00:42:24,544
Oh. Thanks, Marcos.
1192
00:42:24,586 --> 00:42:28,048
You'll be singing
a different tune at rehearsal.
1193
00:42:28,089 --> 00:42:30,133
The wrong tune.
1194
00:42:30,175 --> 00:42:31,343
(both laughing)
1195
00:42:31,384 --> 00:42:32,635
You're so funny.
1196
00:42:32,677 --> 00:42:34,346
Hilarious!
1197
00:42:36,931 --> 00:42:39,392
And yeah, Templeton,
don't be late.
1198
00:42:39,434 --> 00:42:41,102
-(laughs)
-(gasps) Late.
1199
00:42:41,144 --> 00:42:43,229
-I'm late.
-ARMSTRONG: Next subject.
1200
00:42:43,271 --> 00:42:44,439
Yes!
1201
00:42:44,481 --> 00:42:46,399
(straining):
Just a little further.
1202
00:42:46,441 --> 00:42:49,527
(babies giggling, babbling)
1203
00:42:49,569 --> 00:42:50,737
Glue!
1204
00:42:50,779 --> 00:42:52,572
(yells, screams)
1205
00:42:52,614 --> 00:42:53,740
-TIM: Excuse me.
-(engine revving)
1206
00:42:53,782 --> 00:42:55,033
Yes, Marcos.
1207
00:42:55,075 --> 00:42:57,869
Can I have a hall pass?
I have to go.
1208
00:42:57,911 --> 00:43:00,413
ARMSTRONG:
Voilà. Feel free.
1209
00:43:00,455 --> 00:43:02,082
(scoffs) Now what?
1210
00:43:02,123 --> 00:43:03,875
-(grunts) Now what?
-(babies crying)
1211
00:43:03,917 --> 00:43:05,502
Glue!
1212
00:43:05,543 --> 00:43:07,379
Glue is bad!
1213
00:43:07,420 --> 00:43:09,089
(whimpering)
1214
00:43:09,130 --> 00:43:10,256
Glue.
1215
00:43:10,298 --> 00:43:12,717
(gasps)
Glue is good.
1216
00:43:12,759 --> 00:43:16,096
How to get to
the principal's office.
1217
00:43:16,137 --> 00:43:17,597
Of course.
1218
00:43:17,639 --> 00:43:20,517
You get sent
to the principal's office.
1219
00:43:20,558 --> 00:43:22,686
("It's Tricky" by Run-D.M.C.
playing)
1220
00:43:22,727 --> 00:43:25,021
-Booyah!
-(students gasp)
1221
00:43:25,063 --> 00:43:28,066
* I think it's very vital
to rock a rhyme... *
1222
00:43:28,108 --> 00:43:30,110
* Here we go, it's tricky
to rock a rhyme *
1223
00:43:30,151 --> 00:43:34,030
* To rock a rhyme that's right
on time, it's tricky *
1224
00:43:34,072 --> 00:43:36,366
* It's tricky, tricky,
tricky, tricky *
1225
00:43:36,408 --> 00:43:38,076
* It's tricky to rock a rhyme *
1226
00:43:38,118 --> 00:43:40,620
* To rock a rhyme that's right
on time, it's tricky... *
1227
00:43:40,662 --> 00:43:42,455
What's up, y'all?
1228
00:43:42,497 --> 00:43:44,541
School is...
1229
00:43:44,582 --> 00:43:46,084
-stupid.
-(students gasp)
1230
00:43:46,126 --> 00:43:48,837
(staticky): Listen, you know,
I acknowledge your anger.
1231
00:43:48,878 --> 00:43:51,631
It's, uh, very, uh, feisty,
but please sit down.
1232
00:43:51,673 --> 00:43:54,342
-Okay. Uh, no.
-(students gasp)
1233
00:43:54,384 --> 00:43:57,137
Sitting is... stupid!
1234
00:43:57,178 --> 00:43:59,639
-He's such a bad boy.
-STUDENTS: Ooh.
1235
00:43:59,681 --> 00:44:01,891
(speaking indistinctly
through static)
1236
00:44:01,933 --> 00:44:03,852
* It's tricky to rock a rhyme *
1237
00:44:03,893 --> 00:44:06,479
* To rock a rhyme that's right
on time, it's tricky *
1238
00:44:06,521 --> 00:44:08,982
-* How is it, D? *
-* It's tricky, tricky... *
1239
00:44:09,024 --> 00:44:12,235
All right. I'm afraid you can't
disrupt class any longer.
1240
00:44:12,277 --> 00:44:16,031
Oh, no. Are we gonna have
a talk in your office?
1241
00:44:16,072 --> 00:44:17,657
No.
1242
00:44:17,699 --> 00:44:19,826
-You are gonna have a time-out.
-STUDENTS (gasping): The Box?
1243
00:44:19,868 --> 00:44:21,828
-He's going in the Box.
-(murmuring)
1244
00:44:21,870 --> 00:44:24,330
No, the Box makes you crazy.
1245
00:44:24,372 --> 00:44:25,832
The Box?
1246
00:44:25,874 --> 00:44:29,502
* Sail away,
sail away, sail away *
1247
00:44:29,544 --> 00:44:32,339
(groans)
* Sail away, sail away *
1248
00:44:32,380 --> 00:44:33,798
-* Sail away... *
-(grunts)
1249
00:44:33,840 --> 00:44:36,051
-ARMSTRONG: Sayonara, Marcos.
-(gasps)
1250
00:44:36,092 --> 00:44:38,636
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Your time-out begins now.
1251
00:44:38,678 --> 00:44:40,013
Relax.
1252
00:44:40,055 --> 00:44:42,182
-Wait!
-(music stops)
1253
00:44:42,223 --> 00:44:44,559
(child crying)
1254
00:44:44,601 --> 00:44:46,269
ROBOT VOICE:
Don't cry.
1255
00:44:46,311 --> 00:44:48,188
There, there. All better.
1256
00:44:48,229 --> 00:44:50,523
(Ted grunting)
1257
00:44:50,565 --> 00:44:51,691
(muffled grunting)
1258
00:44:51,733 --> 00:44:53,735
(yells, mumbles)
1259
00:44:53,777 --> 00:44:56,863
(grunting, spitting)
1260
00:44:57,697 --> 00:45:00,283
(sighs)
It's like they always say:
1261
00:45:00,325 --> 00:45:02,160
If you want something
done right,
1262
00:45:02,202 --> 00:45:04,871
you have to do it
without your brother!
1263
00:45:05,747 --> 00:45:08,833
We meet again, doorknob.
1264
00:45:10,377 --> 00:45:12,212
(grunting)
1265
00:45:12,253 --> 00:45:13,880
(door creaking)
1266
00:45:14,673 --> 00:45:16,341
ARMSTRONG:
Hello.
1267
00:45:16,383 --> 00:45:17,842
Welcome, welcome.
1268
00:45:17,884 --> 00:45:19,761
Please come in. Entrez vous?
1269
00:45:19,803 --> 00:45:21,221
You're here.
1270
00:45:21,262 --> 00:45:22,764
Oh, yes. I...
1271
00:45:22,806 --> 00:45:24,974
I was expecting you.
1272
00:45:25,809 --> 00:45:27,894
I... (grunts, yells)
1273
00:45:27,936 --> 00:45:28,895
(button beeps)
1274
00:45:28,937 --> 00:45:31,231
I expected that you
1275
00:45:31,272 --> 00:45:34,317
would be expecting me,
so there.
1276
00:45:34,359 --> 00:45:37,862
Oh, and, uh, by the way,
I know why you're here,
1277
00:45:37,904 --> 00:45:39,906
-so, uh... so there.
-(button beeps)
1278
00:45:39,948 --> 00:45:42,742
(chuckles) You do?
1279
00:45:42,784 --> 00:45:45,036
-Mm-hmm. Yes, I do.
-(button beeps)
1280
00:45:45,078 --> 00:45:46,746
-(whirring)
-Have a seat, please.
1281
00:45:46,788 --> 00:45:48,164
(grunts) Thank you.
1282
00:45:48,206 --> 00:45:49,874
-You know what you are?
-Mm?
1283
00:45:49,916 --> 00:45:54,254
You are, if I may,
extremely intelligent.
1284
00:45:54,295 --> 00:45:55,755
Go on. (grunts)
1285
00:45:55,797 --> 00:45:57,382
Uh, as a matter of fact,
I've been observing you.
1286
00:45:57,424 --> 00:45:58,550
(button beeps)
1287
00:45:58,591 --> 00:46:00,510
Spends time wisely. Check.
1288
00:46:00,552 --> 00:46:03,179
Makes good use of
classroom materials. Check.
1289
00:46:03,221 --> 00:46:05,765
Keeps hands to self. Check.
1290
00:46:05,807 --> 00:46:07,308
Hey, forget
"works well with others."
1291
00:46:07,350 --> 00:46:10,437
You make others
work well for you.
1292
00:46:10,478 --> 00:46:13,857
That's literally the title
of the book I'm working on.
1293
00:46:13,898 --> 00:46:16,109
No kidding.
You had no business
1294
00:46:16,151 --> 00:46:18,236
being in Yellow Level, did you?
1295
00:46:18,278 --> 00:46:20,613
-It was sabotage.
-Sabotage. Exactly.
1296
00:46:20,655 --> 00:46:23,199
Jealousy, fear. Hey, I faced
the same obstacles.
1297
00:46:23,241 --> 00:46:26,828
In fact, you know,
you remind me a lot of myself
1298
00:46:26,870 --> 00:46:29,289
when I was your age,
1299
00:46:29,330 --> 00:46:32,125
which is now.
1300
00:46:32,167 --> 00:46:33,585
(grunts)
1301
00:46:35,545 --> 00:46:36,629
What?
1302
00:46:36,671 --> 00:46:37,964
(laughs)
1303
00:46:38,006 --> 00:46:41,301
Surprise, surprise.
1304
00:46:41,343 --> 00:46:43,803
What the frittata?
1305
00:46:43,845 --> 00:46:44,929
Well put.
1306
00:46:44,971 --> 00:46:47,390
He's a ba... You're a baby.
1307
00:46:47,432 --> 00:46:49,976
I repeat, you're a baby.
1308
00:46:50,018 --> 00:46:52,479
So surprised,
you said it twice. (chuckles)
1309
00:46:52,520 --> 00:46:53,980
(laughs)
1310
00:46:54,022 --> 00:46:57,484
Unfortunately, people are, uh,
not ready for a...
1311
00:46:57,525 --> 00:46:59,736
a baby in a position of power.
1312
00:46:59,778 --> 00:47:01,279
Yet.
1313
00:47:01,321 --> 00:47:03,990
Remind me to get the number
of your muttonchop guy.
1314
00:47:04,032 --> 00:47:06,826
You know, I could use
somebody like you.
1315
00:47:06,868 --> 00:47:10,789
With a superior intelligence
like my own.
1316
00:47:10,830 --> 00:47:13,500
-Uh... really?
-Mmm.
1317
00:47:13,541 --> 00:47:14,918
Somebody who can, uh...
1318
00:47:14,959 --> 00:47:17,087
Mmm. (crunching)
1319
00:47:17,128 --> 00:47:18,505
-Mmm. Yeah.
-(gasps)
1320
00:47:18,546 --> 00:47:21,257
Truly comprehend
what I'm trying to accomplish.
1321
00:47:21,299 --> 00:47:24,010
-Well, you're looking at him.
-Bingo.
1322
00:47:24,052 --> 00:47:26,221
Mmm. We have a secret level.
1323
00:47:26,262 --> 00:47:27,889
Mmm.
For very special babies.
1324
00:47:27,931 --> 00:47:29,391
Mmm. The best of the best.
1325
00:47:29,432 --> 00:47:30,642
Ah. The elite.
1326
00:47:30,684 --> 00:47:31,685
Beyond blue?
1327
00:47:31,726 --> 00:47:33,728
Oh, yeah. Way beyond.
1328
00:47:33,770 --> 00:47:35,730
Way beyond. Ooh.
1329
00:47:35,772 --> 00:47:37,857
Mmm. There's a meeting today...
1330
00:47:37,899 --> 00:47:39,609
(slurps)
...after school.
1331
00:47:39,651 --> 00:47:41,152
Babies only.
1332
00:47:41,194 --> 00:47:44,030
We may be small, but we're
about to teach grown-ups
1333
00:47:44,072 --> 00:47:46,408
a big lesson.
1334
00:47:47,784 --> 00:47:49,703
Mmm. Lolly?
1335
00:47:49,744 --> 00:47:51,037
-Okay.
-(school bell ringing)
1336
00:47:51,079 --> 00:47:52,580
Oh. Time for recess.
1337
00:47:52,622 --> 00:47:54,082
-Bye-bye.
-(button beeps)
1338
00:47:54,791 --> 00:47:56,835
(singsongy):
Sayonara....
1339
00:47:56,876 --> 00:47:58,420
(groans)
1340
00:47:59,462 --> 00:48:01,214
(grunts)
1341
00:48:01,256 --> 00:48:03,466
Well, I think that went well.
1342
00:48:04,592 --> 00:48:06,386
-TED (recorded): You're a baby.
-TINA: What?
1343
00:48:06,428 --> 00:48:08,430
-I repeat, you're a baby.
-(scoffs)
1344
00:48:08,471 --> 00:48:10,640
Is he talking to me?
He better not be talking to me,
1345
00:48:10,682 --> 00:48:12,142
because I'll... Armstrong?
1346
00:48:12,183 --> 00:48:13,893
(chuckles)
You're right, Connie.
1347
00:48:13,935 --> 00:48:15,437
He's talking about Armstrong.
1348
00:48:15,478 --> 00:48:17,230
-I don't know what has
gotten into her. -(gasps)
1349
00:48:17,272 --> 00:48:20,900
-But she's acting strange,
Dr. Federman. -(laughing)
1350
00:48:20,942 --> 00:48:23,153
Isn't it a bit early
for terrible twos?
1351
00:48:23,194 --> 00:48:25,030
Is there terrible ones?
Is that a thing?
1352
00:48:25,071 --> 00:48:26,573
Oh, piano-playing bunny,
you slay me.
1353
00:48:26,614 --> 00:48:28,158
Okey dokey.
1354
00:48:28,199 --> 00:48:32,495
We need some eyes on the prize,
visual confirmation here.
1355
00:48:32,537 --> 00:48:33,788
(snoring)
1356
00:48:33,830 --> 00:48:36,041
Oh, Daddy.
1357
00:48:36,082 --> 00:48:38,126
If I were there,
I'd pinch you so hard.
1358
00:48:38,168 --> 00:48:40,003
(sleepily):
* Sail away, sail away... *
1359
00:48:40,045 --> 00:48:41,838
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Your time-out has concluded.
1360
00:48:41,880 --> 00:48:43,757
Sail away! What time is it?
1361
00:48:43,798 --> 00:48:45,467
AUTOMATED VOICE:
It is time for recess.
1362
00:48:45,508 --> 00:48:47,510
I'm late, I'm late,
I'm late, I'm late. Come on.
1363
00:48:47,552 --> 00:48:49,512
(chuckling):
He'll understand, right?
1364
00:48:49,554 --> 00:48:51,348
(gasps) Okay.
Where is he? Where is he?
1365
00:48:51,389 --> 00:48:54,726
-Where is he? Uh...
-(kids chattering, whooping)
1366
00:48:54,768 --> 00:48:56,686
-Oomph! Yeah, baby!
-(cheering)
1367
00:48:56,728 --> 00:48:58,271
No, not my bows.
1368
00:48:58,313 --> 00:49:01,649
-But they're not your bows...
anymore. -(sobbing)
1369
00:49:01,691 --> 00:49:04,652
Yep, where there's crying,
there's my brother.
1370
00:49:06,279 --> 00:49:09,449
(playing "May" from
The Shawshank Redemption)
1371
00:49:09,491 --> 00:49:11,659
BABY (whispers):
Psst. Here you go.
1372
00:49:11,701 --> 00:49:13,244
BABY 2:
Cool.
1373
00:49:13,995 --> 00:49:16,331
(grunting):
Glue. Glue. Glue.
1374
00:49:19,250 --> 00:49:21,002
-Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, blue.
-Whoa!
1375
00:49:21,044 --> 00:49:22,796
Where do you think
youse going? You lost?
1376
00:49:22,837 --> 00:49:23,797
Could you let me through,
please?
1377
00:49:23,838 --> 00:49:25,256
No!
1378
00:49:25,298 --> 00:49:27,967
So, what, did you flunk
coloring class, kid?
1379
00:49:28,009 --> 00:49:29,594
-(laughter)
-Really, guy?
1380
00:49:30,553 --> 00:49:32,305
Mmm, cherry.
1381
00:49:32,347 --> 00:49:33,306
Go on.
1382
00:49:33,348 --> 00:49:34,683
-Blues on the other side.
-(groans)
1383
00:49:34,724 --> 00:49:36,017
TED:
Let him through.
1384
00:49:36,059 --> 00:49:37,143
Okay, he's cool.
1385
00:49:37,185 --> 00:49:38,561
TIM:
See? I'm cool.
1386
00:49:38,603 --> 00:49:39,813
I'm cool.
1387
00:49:39,854 --> 00:49:41,648
You failed me, Tim.
1388
00:49:41,690 --> 00:49:43,108
I was desperate.
1389
00:49:43,149 --> 00:49:45,819
I crawled.
I did things with glue
1390
00:49:45,860 --> 00:49:48,238
that I'm not proud of,
but I made it.
1391
00:49:48,279 --> 00:49:50,198
I made it all the way
to Armstrong's office,
1392
00:49:50,240 --> 00:49:52,200
and then where's Tim?
1393
00:49:52,242 --> 00:49:53,410
-I know. I...
-Where's Tim?
1394
00:49:53,451 --> 00:49:55,161
-I tried to...
-Where's Tim?!
1395
00:49:55,203 --> 00:49:57,038
-I was in the Box, okay?
-(babies gasping)
1396
00:49:57,080 --> 00:49:58,289
-TED: The Box?
-The Box?
1397
00:49:58,331 --> 00:49:59,165
Glue.
1398
00:49:59,207 --> 00:50:00,709
Yeah, that's right.
1399
00:50:00,750 --> 00:50:01,960
(whispers):
The Box.
1400
00:50:02,002 --> 00:50:03,336
Show a little respect.
1401
00:50:03,378 --> 00:50:06,256
See, Tim, this is why
I work alone.
1402
00:50:06,297 --> 00:50:08,842
-(sighs)
-I'll succeed in the mission.
1403
00:50:08,883 --> 00:50:10,385
You can take the pony home.
1404
00:50:10,427 --> 00:50:12,762
The only thing
you're ever gonna succeed at
1405
00:50:12,804 --> 00:50:13,805
is being alone.
1406
00:50:13,847 --> 00:50:15,015
-Fine.
-Fine!
1407
00:50:15,056 --> 00:50:16,516
Fine!
1408
00:50:16,558 --> 00:50:18,018
I like ponies.
1409
00:50:18,059 --> 00:50:20,395
Aah! Thank you for sharing.
1410
00:50:20,437 --> 00:50:22,731
(piano playing gentle tune)
1411
00:50:25,567 --> 00:50:27,402
-(Nathan groans in frustration)
-(piano plays discordant notes)
1412
00:50:27,444 --> 00:50:29,029
NATHAN:
You are blowing it, Templeton!
1413
00:50:29,070 --> 00:50:30,196
MEGHAN:
Yeah, Templeton.
1414
00:50:30,238 --> 00:50:31,614
TABITHA:
I'm trying.
1415
00:50:31,656 --> 00:50:34,284
NATHAN: Ugh! You always
come in a beat late.
1416
00:50:34,325 --> 00:50:36,786
I'm sorry, Nathan.
I'm doing my best.
1417
00:50:36,828 --> 00:50:40,707
Your best is going to keep me
out of going to Juilliard.
1418
00:50:40,749 --> 00:50:42,667
-Yeah, Templeton.
-It's one, two, three
1419
00:50:42,709 --> 00:50:45,086
-and one, two, three.
-MEGHAN: One, two, three.
1420
00:50:45,128 --> 00:50:46,588
NATHAN and MEGHAN:
And one, two, three
1421
00:50:46,629 --> 00:50:49,382
and one, two, three
and one, two, three.
1422
00:50:49,424 --> 00:50:52,719
-And one, two...
-Oh, come on!
1423
00:50:52,761 --> 00:50:54,054
Are you kidding me?
1424
00:50:54,095 --> 00:50:55,722
I just can't do it
right now, okay?
1425
00:50:55,764 --> 00:50:57,182
I can't. I just can't.
1426
00:50:57,223 --> 00:50:59,351
-I'll do it tomorrow.
-MEGHAN: Seriously?
1427
00:50:59,392 --> 00:51:01,227
-(school bell rings)
-(kids cheering)
1428
00:51:01,269 --> 00:51:03,480
NATHAN: All right,
all right, all right.
1429
00:51:03,521 --> 00:51:05,899
See you at the pageant
tomorrow.
1430
00:51:05,940 --> 00:51:07,859
Beat it!
1431
00:51:12,489 --> 00:51:15,658
MEGHAN: Oh, Nathan,
Nathan, let me do it.
1432
00:51:15,700 --> 00:51:17,035
Let me do it, Nathan.
1433
00:51:17,077 --> 00:51:18,578
I want to sing the song.
1434
00:51:18,620 --> 00:51:19,913
No.
1435
00:51:19,954 --> 00:51:21,873
I want to see her fail.
1436
00:51:21,915 --> 00:51:23,583
Oh.
1437
00:51:23,625 --> 00:51:25,210
Pure genius.
1438
00:51:25,251 --> 00:51:27,420
-(laughing)
-(plays ominous chords)
1439
00:51:27,462 --> 00:51:29,089
NATHAN:
I can't wait.
1440
00:51:29,130 --> 00:51:30,632
-We'll see about that.
-(school bell ringing)
1441
00:51:30,674 --> 00:51:32,592
ARMSTRONG (over speaker):
Goodbye, children.
1442
00:51:32,634 --> 00:51:33,760
Sayonara.
1443
00:51:33,802 --> 00:51:35,095
Auf Wiedersehen.
1444
00:51:35,136 --> 00:51:36,262
Adieu.
1445
00:51:36,304 --> 00:51:38,223
Adios, niños.
1446
00:51:38,264 --> 00:51:39,766
(students chattering)
1447
00:51:39,808 --> 00:51:41,267
-(sighs)
-(horse neighs)
1448
00:51:41,309 --> 00:51:42,894
(Tim gasps)
1449
00:51:42,936 --> 00:51:44,270
Oh, come on.
1450
00:51:45,146 --> 00:51:46,356
(yells)
1451
00:51:47,482 --> 00:51:48,858
(yelps)
1452
00:51:48,900 --> 00:51:51,277
Oh, my gosh.
1453
00:51:51,319 --> 00:51:54,739
-Stop what you're doing.
-(chatter stops)
1454
00:51:54,781 --> 00:51:56,116
I see a baby pony.
1455
00:51:56,157 --> 00:51:57,951
-(screaming)
-(excited chatter)
1456
00:51:57,992 --> 00:51:59,494
I like ponies.
1457
00:51:59,536 --> 00:52:00,787
STUDENT:
Oh, over there!
1458
00:52:00,829 --> 00:52:01,955
-Yes!
-(laughter)
1459
00:52:01,996 --> 00:52:04,124
It's so cute!
1460
00:52:04,165 --> 00:52:05,917
(excited chatter)
1461
00:52:05,959 --> 00:52:08,336
(horn honks)
1462
00:52:12,215 --> 00:52:14,009
That's it? No hello?
1463
00:52:14,050 --> 00:52:16,052
-Not even a "Hi, Mom"?
-What?
1464
00:52:16,094 --> 00:52:17,929
-Hi, Tabitha!
-(gasps)
1465
00:52:17,971 --> 00:52:19,848
-Oh. Hi.
-(Tina coughs)
1466
00:52:20,640 --> 00:52:22,225
What?
You never told me you had
1467
00:52:22,267 --> 00:52:24,102
an older sister
who could drive.
1468
00:52:24,144 --> 00:52:25,603
Uh, that's my mom.
1469
00:52:25,645 --> 00:52:27,355
Tabitha, don't interrupt.
(chuckles)
1470
00:52:27,397 --> 00:52:29,441
-Yeah, I'm a new friend
of Tabitha's... -Hey, stop.
1471
00:52:29,482 --> 00:52:31,484
-(mumbling)
-Oh, really?
1472
00:52:31,526 --> 00:52:33,319
I-I mean, we just met.
1473
00:52:33,361 --> 00:52:34,362
Well, what's your name,
new friend?
1474
00:52:34,404 --> 00:52:36,448
Stop. You're embarrassing me.
1475
00:52:36,489 --> 00:52:38,783
-Marcos. Marcos Lightspeed.
-(horse neighs)
1476
00:52:38,825 --> 00:52:40,160
(babbles, grunts)
1477
00:52:40,201 --> 00:52:41,536
-Ow!
-CAROL: Tina!
1478
00:52:41,578 --> 00:52:42,996
-What is with you?
-(Tim chuckles)
1479
00:52:43,038 --> 00:52:44,456
Cute kid.
1480
00:52:44,497 --> 00:52:46,416
Well, I better get going
if I'm gonna walk those
1481
00:52:46,458 --> 00:52:49,002
three and a half miles home...
1482
00:52:49,044 --> 00:52:50,378
in the snow...
1483
00:52:50,420 --> 00:52:52,005
without a jacket.
1484
00:52:52,047 --> 00:52:53,840
Three and a half miles?
1485
00:52:53,882 --> 00:52:56,676
Three and a half, six--
somewhere in there. (chuckles)
1486
00:52:56,718 --> 00:52:59,054
Yeah, well, that TV dinner
is not gonna microwave itself.
1487
00:52:59,095 --> 00:53:00,472
TV dinner?
1488
00:53:00,513 --> 00:53:02,849
Yeah, I'm a latchkey kid,
so I eat whatever I want.
1489
00:53:02,891 --> 00:53:04,893
-Cartoons are my babysitter.
-(tires screech)
1490
00:53:04,934 --> 00:53:06,102
-No.
-Oh, yeah.
1491
00:53:06,144 --> 00:53:08,104
(scoffs)
1492
00:53:08,146 --> 00:53:11,399
* Strangers in the night *
1493
00:53:11,441 --> 00:53:13,902
* Exchanging glances *
1494
00:53:13,943 --> 00:53:15,195
* Lovers... *
1495
00:53:15,236 --> 00:53:16,696
What is this?
1496
00:53:16,738 --> 00:53:19,032
Some kind of prank?
1497
00:53:19,074 --> 00:53:20,367
Children can be so cruel.
1498
00:53:20,408 --> 00:53:21,826
-Hello.
-(electronic chime)
1499
00:53:21,868 --> 00:53:24,662
(screaming)
1500
00:53:24,704 --> 00:53:26,373
(grunts)
1501
00:53:28,833 --> 00:53:30,335
(retches)
1502
00:53:30,377 --> 00:53:32,629
-(grunts)
-(babies yelling, laughing)
1503
00:53:33,838 --> 00:53:35,215
(grunts)
1504
00:53:35,256 --> 00:53:36,800
(retches)
1505
00:53:36,841 --> 00:53:40,929
Whoa. This is exactly like
Bill Gates' rec room...
1506
00:53:40,970 --> 00:53:43,431
but a little smaller.
1507
00:53:44,182 --> 00:53:46,267
(grunting)
1508
00:53:47,227 --> 00:53:49,479
-(straining)
-(scraping)
1509
00:53:52,315 --> 00:53:55,068
What is all this?
1510
00:53:55,110 --> 00:53:57,362
Research and development?
1511
00:53:58,697 --> 00:54:00,907
Product testing?
1512
00:54:02,534 --> 00:54:06,996
Huh. Something tells me
this isn't day care.
1513
00:54:08,039 --> 00:54:10,917
Boy, could I use
a spy camera right about now.
1514
00:54:10,959 --> 00:54:14,462
* Sail away, sail away,
sail away. *
1515
00:54:15,255 --> 00:54:17,007
Anyway...
1516
00:54:18,675 --> 00:54:21,094
-(gasps)
-(muffled babbling)
1517
00:54:21,136 --> 00:54:22,679
TED:
Aw.
1518
00:54:22,721 --> 00:54:25,765
Now, aren't you a cutie
in that little karate outfit.
1519
00:54:25,807 --> 00:54:27,100
(baby grunts)
1520
00:54:27,142 --> 00:54:28,351
Huh.
1521
00:54:28,393 --> 00:54:30,520
(all whooping, grunting)
1522
00:54:30,562 --> 00:54:33,273
Is this some kind
of a ninja boy band?
1523
00:54:33,314 --> 00:54:34,482
(screams)
1524
00:54:34,524 --> 00:54:37,110
-Whoa...!
-(babies whooping)
1525
00:54:37,152 --> 00:54:39,112
Whoa!
1526
00:54:39,154 --> 00:54:40,947
Oh. Whoa, whoa.
1527
00:54:40,989 --> 00:54:42,866
(all grunting, whooping)
1528
00:54:42,907 --> 00:54:45,118
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh!
1529
00:54:45,160 --> 00:54:46,119
(screams)
1530
00:54:46,161 --> 00:54:47,620
Whoa. (yells)
1531
00:54:47,662 --> 00:54:48,621
I give up.
1532
00:54:48,663 --> 00:54:52,375
Cobra Kai! Cobra Kai!
1533
00:54:52,417 --> 00:54:55,420
(all grunting rapidly)
1534
00:54:55,462 --> 00:54:57,297
TED:
Sayonara, baby!
1535
00:54:57,339 --> 00:54:59,341
-Hey, there you are.
-Oh, hello! (coughs)
1536
00:54:59,382 --> 00:55:00,675
Thank you. (sighs)
1537
00:55:00,717 --> 00:55:02,469
I see that you've angered
my baby ninjas.
1538
00:55:02,510 --> 00:55:03,887
-Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
-(baby laughs, grunts)
1539
00:55:03,928 --> 00:55:05,638
-Shoo. Shoo. (chuckles)
-(sneezes, babbles)
1540
00:55:05,680 --> 00:55:07,849
What maniacal underground
fortress doesn't have ninjas?
1541
00:55:07,891 --> 00:55:09,476
-Am I right? (grunts)
-Impressive, huh?
1542
00:55:09,517 --> 00:55:10,810
Pretty impressive.
1543
00:55:10,852 --> 00:55:12,312
What do you think?
What do you think?
1544
00:55:12,354 --> 00:55:13,438
TED:
I know tuition is pretty steep,
1545
00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:15,565
but how do you afford all this?
1546
00:55:15,607 --> 00:55:17,525
ARMSTRONG:
Oh, that's a good question.
1547
00:55:17,567 --> 00:55:20,111
-I taught babies to code.
-No.
1548
00:55:20,153 --> 00:55:22,113
ARMSTRONG: Yes. And you know
what they say about having
1549
00:55:22,155 --> 00:55:24,324
an infinite amount of monkeys
banging on typewriters?
1550
00:55:24,366 --> 00:55:26,201
They will eventually
write Shakespeare?
1551
00:55:26,242 --> 00:55:28,370
A-plus.
Oh, boy, you are smart.
1552
00:55:28,411 --> 00:55:32,290
Or the most popular apps
that money can buy.
1553
00:55:32,332 --> 00:55:34,376
Apps. They're writing apps.
1554
00:55:34,417 --> 00:55:36,002
-Cat Chat.
-(cat meows)
1555
00:55:36,044 --> 00:55:37,337
Palm Doodle.
1556
00:55:37,379 --> 00:55:39,005
Ooh, Find My Nose.
1557
00:55:39,047 --> 00:55:40,423
-(Ted gasps)
-Stock Crush.
1558
00:55:40,465 --> 00:55:42,008
-You did Stock Crush?
-(cash register dings)
1559
00:55:42,050 --> 00:55:43,677
I love Stock Crush.
1560
00:55:43,718 --> 00:55:46,596
All us. But my next app...
1561
00:55:46,638 --> 00:55:49,349
ooh, it's gonna change
the world.
1562
00:55:49,391 --> 00:55:50,433
Forever.
1563
00:55:50,475 --> 00:55:51,768
So why bother with a school?
1564
00:55:51,810 --> 00:55:54,312
You could go public
and make millions.
1565
00:55:54,354 --> 00:55:56,064
Oh. (laughs)
1566
00:55:56,106 --> 00:55:58,441
-Billions.
-Billions.
1567
00:55:58,483 --> 00:56:01,528
Yeah, but some things are
more important than money.
1568
00:56:01,569 --> 00:56:03,196
Please don't say "love."
1569
00:56:03,238 --> 00:56:05,407
Mmm. Power.
1570
00:56:05,448 --> 00:56:07,617
That's more like it.
1571
00:56:08,576 --> 00:56:10,453
TIM:
Wow. This is so amazing.
1572
00:56:10,495 --> 00:56:13,206
First, the ride, and now
a-a full sit-down dinner.
1573
00:56:13,248 --> 00:56:14,916
Wow. What a palace.
1574
00:56:14,958 --> 00:56:17,335
-I mean, you have electricity?
-Well, yeah.
1575
00:56:17,377 --> 00:56:19,504
Man, you guys
are beyond generous.
1576
00:56:19,546 --> 00:56:21,548
You're welcome anytime.
1577
00:56:21,589 --> 00:56:23,174
-(groans)
-CAROL: Tabitha, would you mind
1578
00:56:23,216 --> 00:56:24,843
-setting the table?
-Okay, Mom.
1579
00:56:24,884 --> 00:56:27,095
Really? You're just gonna
throw that right there, huh?
1580
00:56:27,137 --> 00:56:28,263
(gasps)
1581
00:56:28,304 --> 00:56:30,890
Psst. Psst. Daddy.
1582
00:56:30,932 --> 00:56:32,767
-Shh! It's Marcos.
-What are you doing here?
1583
00:56:32,809 --> 00:56:34,352
-Where's Uncle Ted?
-What?
1584
00:56:34,394 --> 00:56:35,395
He kicked me off the mission.
1585
00:56:35,437 --> 00:56:36,354
He can't do that.
1586
00:56:36,396 --> 00:56:37,397
Only I can do that.
1587
00:56:37,439 --> 00:56:38,606
You're back on the mission.
1588
00:56:38,648 --> 00:56:40,066
No need.
I have my own mission now.
1589
00:56:40,108 --> 00:56:42,360
What? What could be more
important than my mission?
1590
00:56:42,402 --> 00:56:44,571
Got to go. Lightspeed out.
1591
00:56:45,780 --> 00:56:47,240
This is so great.
(chuckles)
1592
00:56:47,282 --> 00:56:48,825
Well, I hope you're hungry.
1593
00:56:48,867 --> 00:56:50,535
Been so long since I've
used silverware. (chuckles)
1594
00:56:50,577 --> 00:56:53,038
So, how'd you like
your first day?
1595
00:56:53,079 --> 00:56:54,414
Kind of intense.
1596
00:56:54,456 --> 00:56:56,416
(chuckles):
Yeah. You'll get used to it.
1597
00:56:56,458 --> 00:56:57,959
-Even that Nathan kid?
-Nathan.
1598
00:56:58,001 --> 00:57:00,211
-Ugh. He's a mess.
-(chuckles): Yeah.
1599
00:57:00,253 --> 00:57:02,422
-He is such a square.
-A square?
1600
00:57:02,464 --> 00:57:04,424
Uh, yeah, you know,
like a dork.
1601
00:57:04,466 --> 00:57:06,343
Dweeb. Nerdlet.
A real poindexter.
1602
00:57:06,384 --> 00:57:07,886
Lame-o. Dorkus to the max.
1603
00:57:07,927 --> 00:57:09,721
(chuckles)
They used to call me.
1604
00:57:09,763 --> 00:57:12,223
-(chuckles) You're weird.
-I am?
1605
00:57:12,265 --> 00:57:14,267
Yeah, but in a good way.
1606
00:57:14,309 --> 00:57:15,769
(both chuckle)
1607
00:57:15,810 --> 00:57:18,355
So, why is the pageant
stressing you out so much?
1608
00:57:18,396 --> 00:57:20,482
(groans)
I have to sing.
1609
00:57:20,523 --> 00:57:22,692
-So what?
-I don't know.
1610
00:57:22,734 --> 00:57:25,070
My whole family is
going to be there,
1611
00:57:25,111 --> 00:57:27,238
including my dad.
1612
00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:28,782
Oh.
1613
00:57:28,823 --> 00:57:30,200
Right.
1614
00:57:30,241 --> 00:57:32,285
You're embarrassed of him?
1615
00:57:32,327 --> 00:57:34,371
No. No, it's not that.
1616
00:57:34,412 --> 00:57:35,914
(Tim sighs heavily)
1617
00:57:35,955 --> 00:57:37,707
It's just, he's really good
at this kind of thing--
1618
00:57:37,749 --> 00:57:41,503
being creative
and using your imagination--
1619
00:57:41,544 --> 00:57:43,546
but it's hard for me.
1620
00:57:43,588 --> 00:57:45,799
I just want him
to be proud of me.
1621
00:57:45,840 --> 00:57:47,133
You know?
1622
00:57:47,175 --> 00:57:49,135
(coos)
1623
00:57:49,177 --> 00:57:50,136
Really?
1624
00:57:50,178 --> 00:57:52,847
Well, yeah.
1625
00:57:53,807 --> 00:57:55,975
Um, who are
these extra plates for?
1626
00:57:56,017 --> 00:57:57,811
-(doorbell rings)
-(whispers): Mom and Dad.
1627
00:57:57,852 --> 00:57:59,729
Hey, hey!
The key still works!
1628
00:57:59,771 --> 00:58:01,272
You guys should really
change the locks.
1629
00:58:01,314 --> 00:58:02,857
-Oh, you made it.
-Look who's here!
1630
00:58:02,899 --> 00:58:03,650
Mom and Dad.
1631
00:58:03,692 --> 00:58:04,818
TABITHA:
Grandma! Grandpa!
1632
00:58:04,859 --> 00:58:06,611
-TED SR.: There she is.
-(gasps)
1633
00:58:06,653 --> 00:58:08,113
-Come here, my little
tabby cat. -Yay! You're here!
1634
00:58:08,154 --> 00:58:10,198
-Look at how big you are.
-You're almost a teenager.
1635
00:58:10,240 --> 00:58:11,616
Can you vote yet?
1636
00:58:11,658 --> 00:58:12,867
TABITHA: Ten and a half
more years, Grandma.
1637
00:58:12,909 --> 00:58:14,119
Daddy, they're gonna
recognize you.
1638
00:58:14,160 --> 00:58:15,286
No, no. It's fine.
1639
00:58:15,328 --> 00:58:17,205
I've got the glasses. See?
1640
00:58:17,247 --> 00:58:18,665
-TED SR. and TABITHA: Selfie!
-How do you do it again?
1641
00:58:18,707 --> 00:58:19,958
Bring out the baby.
1642
00:58:20,000 --> 00:58:21,543
-Hide!
-Where are you hiding that baby?
1643
00:58:21,584 --> 00:58:22,961
No. Just be cool. Be cool.
1644
00:58:23,003 --> 00:58:24,504
-JANICE: There she is.
-TED SR.: Hello.
1645
00:58:24,546 --> 00:58:25,755
TED SR.:
Hey, who's the new guy?
1646
00:58:25,797 --> 00:58:27,674
-That's Marcos.
-I gotcha.
1647
00:58:27,716 --> 00:58:30,927
(babies clamoring)
1648
00:58:30,969 --> 00:58:33,263
Attention, babies. Bienvenue.
1649
00:58:33,304 --> 00:58:35,015
Willkommen.
1650
00:58:35,056 --> 00:58:36,391
Dobro pozhalovat'.
1651
00:58:36,433 --> 00:58:39,144
-And namaste.
-(clamoring continues)
1652
00:58:39,185 --> 00:58:41,104
Uh, babies.
1653
00:58:41,146 --> 00:58:42,439
Hey, hey.
1654
00:58:42,480 --> 00:58:43,898
-No more screen time.
-(clamoring stops)
1655
00:58:43,940 --> 00:58:46,276
-(whimpering)
-ARMSTRONG: Listen.
1656
00:58:46,317 --> 00:58:49,571
Believe it or not,
I used to be just like you.
1657
00:58:49,612 --> 00:58:52,198
-(cooing)
-Yes. I even had parents.
1658
00:58:52,240 --> 00:58:55,618
Mine were child psychologists
1659
00:58:55,660 --> 00:58:58,121
who made me part
of an experiment.
1660
00:58:58,163 --> 00:58:59,372
Really?
1661
00:58:59,414 --> 00:59:02,042
They exposed me to 10,000 hours
1662
00:59:02,083 --> 00:59:05,628
-of Mozart, language lessons
and public radio. -Huh. Wow.
1663
00:59:05,670 --> 00:59:07,422
I hate public radio.
1664
00:59:07,464 --> 00:59:10,967
It was at that point I realized
I was smarter than my parents.
1665
00:59:11,009 --> 00:59:14,971
And with my first step,
I ran away from home.
1666
00:59:15,013 --> 00:59:17,223
-(babies moan sadly)
-Why?
1667
00:59:17,265 --> 00:59:19,059
They pushed me around.
1668
00:59:19,100 --> 00:59:21,227
I got told what to do
all the time.
1669
00:59:21,269 --> 00:59:22,395
(crying)
1670
00:59:22,437 --> 00:59:25,440
But a single word
changed my life.
1671
00:59:25,482 --> 00:59:27,067
"No." Say it.
1672
00:59:27,108 --> 00:59:28,401
ALL:
No!
1673
00:59:28,443 --> 00:59:30,403
-Take a nap.
-Nyet!
1674
00:59:30,445 --> 00:59:32,322
-Put on your coat.
-Nein!
1675
00:59:32,364 --> 00:59:34,699
-Eat your vegetables.
-Nahii!
1676
00:59:34,741 --> 00:59:36,993
Are you gonna let grown-ups
push you around?
1677
00:59:37,035 --> 00:59:39,371
No, no! No, no, no!
No, no! No, no, no!
1678
00:59:39,412 --> 00:59:40,747
-Are you?
-Good God, no.
1679
00:59:40,789 --> 00:59:42,082
That's right.
1680
00:59:42,123 --> 00:59:45,085
Why do parents get to be
in charge, anyway?
1681
00:59:45,126 --> 00:59:47,504
They had their chance,
and what did we get?
1682
00:59:47,545 --> 00:59:51,675
Pollution, politics, wars.
1683
00:59:51,716 --> 00:59:54,052
BABIES:
Ooh.
1684
00:59:54,094 --> 00:59:56,096
Not "ooh." "Boo."
1685
00:59:56,137 --> 00:59:57,722
ALL:
Boo!
1686
00:59:57,764 --> 01:00:01,101
The only thing holding us back
is them,
1687
01:00:01,142 --> 01:00:02,769
but not anymore.
1688
01:00:02,811 --> 01:00:06,690
The moment that we've worked
so hard for is almost here.
1689
01:00:06,731 --> 01:00:07,857
-B-Day.
-(babies cheering)
1690
01:00:07,899 --> 01:00:09,109
-B-Day?
-B-Day.
1691
01:00:09,150 --> 01:00:11,236
-I'm this many.
-I'm this many.
1692
01:00:11,277 --> 01:00:13,613
No, no, it's not...
it's not your birthday.
1693
01:00:13,655 --> 01:00:16,491
It's the beginning
of the baby revolution.
1694
01:00:16,533 --> 01:00:18,326
-Yay, yay.
-(babies cheering)
1695
01:00:18,368 --> 01:00:20,995
And there'll be cake.
Cake for everybody.
1696
01:00:21,037 --> 01:00:23,790
BABIES (chanting): Cake! Cake!
Cake! Cake! Cake! Cake!
1697
01:00:23,832 --> 01:00:25,417
-No more rules.
-(chanting continues)
1698
01:00:25,458 --> 01:00:27,293
Oh là là!
1699
01:00:27,335 --> 01:00:29,045
No more parents.
1700
01:00:29,087 --> 01:00:30,296
Uh-oh.
1701
01:00:30,338 --> 01:00:31,464
Pew, pew, pew, pew!
1702
01:00:31,506 --> 01:00:33,967
Sayonara, Mama and Papa!
1703
01:00:34,009 --> 01:00:36,011
-Oh, this is bad.
-(chuckles)
1704
01:00:36,052 --> 01:00:37,929
All right, pep rally's over.
1705
01:00:37,971 --> 01:00:40,348
Your-your parents
are gonna pick you up.
1706
01:00:40,390 --> 01:00:41,433
(crying)
1707
01:00:41,474 --> 01:00:42,976
This is my life's work.
1708
01:00:43,018 --> 01:00:45,937
Oh, yes, 17 long months.
1709
01:00:45,979 --> 01:00:48,565
To... no more parents.
(laughs)
1710
01:00:48,606 --> 01:00:50,233
Mmm. (gargles, slurps)
1711
01:00:50,275 --> 01:00:52,694
Cheers to the revolution.
1712
01:00:53,653 --> 01:00:55,363
-No. Nope. Nope.
-(Tabitha chuckles)
1713
01:00:55,405 --> 01:00:57,240
-No. Oh, that's a keeper.
-TABITHA: Oh, Tina.
1714
01:00:57,282 --> 01:00:59,367
Oh, it's so cute.
What's the app called?
1715
01:00:59,409 --> 01:01:00,827
-It's called QT Snap.
-Oh.
1716
01:01:00,869 --> 01:01:02,787
-Show me how to download that.
-Everyone has it.
1717
01:01:02,829 --> 01:01:04,831
So, Marcos... Lightspeed?
1718
01:01:04,873 --> 01:01:06,458
-Is that what you said?
-Mm-hmm.
1719
01:01:06,499 --> 01:01:08,293
Sounds like a cartoon name.
1720
01:01:08,335 --> 01:01:09,502
(laughing)
1721
01:01:09,544 --> 01:01:11,338
-It really does.
-(laughs awkwardly)
1722
01:01:11,379 --> 01:01:14,299
Well, my parents,
they're a little wacky, so...
1723
01:01:14,341 --> 01:01:15,925
(slurping)
1724
01:01:15,967 --> 01:01:18,678
Huh. It's like I know you
from somewhere.
1725
01:01:18,720 --> 01:01:20,055
I don't think so.
1726
01:01:20,096 --> 01:01:21,723
-That is a keeper, too.
-Hey. Hey.
1727
01:01:21,765 --> 01:01:23,767
-Doesn't he look familiar?
-I don't think I do.
1728
01:01:23,808 --> 01:01:25,226
Yeah, he looks just like Tim.
1729
01:01:25,268 --> 01:01:26,853
Yeah. You look like Tim.
1730
01:01:26,895 --> 01:01:29,064
-(coughs)
-Hmm? -Huh?
1731
01:01:29,105 --> 01:01:30,607
Except Tim didn't wear glasses.
1732
01:01:30,648 --> 01:01:32,776
Oh, that's right.
(scoffs)
1733
01:01:32,817 --> 01:01:35,278
Huh. Well, how about that.
1734
01:01:35,320 --> 01:01:37,864
-(Tina sighs)
-Hey, where is Tim, anyway?
1735
01:01:37,906 --> 01:01:39,699
Tim and Ted are on a trip.
1736
01:01:39,741 --> 01:01:41,910
-TED SR. and JANICE: Together?
-They're bonding.
1737
01:01:41,951 --> 01:01:43,995
-Well, that's about time.
-Yeah.
1738
01:01:44,037 --> 01:01:46,206
I just hope Tim's back
in time for the pageant.
1739
01:01:46,247 --> 01:01:47,707
-(Janice scoffs)
-(Ted Sr. chuckles)
1740
01:01:47,749 --> 01:01:50,669
Uh, why...
why wouldn't he be there?
1741
01:01:50,710 --> 01:01:52,712
-(laughs) Tim Time.
-Tim Time.
1742
01:01:52,754 --> 01:01:53,755
-JANICE: Oh. (chuckles)
-(Carol laughs)
1743
01:01:53,797 --> 01:01:54,881
What's-what's Tim Time?
1744
01:01:54,923 --> 01:01:56,383
-Go ahead.
-Okay.
1745
01:01:56,424 --> 01:02:00,345
Well, Marcos, Tim Time
is like a black hole
1746
01:02:00,387 --> 01:02:04,808
where things like reality
and being on time get lost.
1747
01:02:04,849 --> 01:02:06,267
-(Tabitha laughs)
-Oh.
1748
01:02:06,309 --> 01:02:09,062
Tabitha's father has
a very active imagination.
1749
01:02:09,104 --> 01:02:10,814
Which is a good thing.
1750
01:02:10,855 --> 01:02:12,524
Yeah, that's a...
I'd say that's a good thing.
1751
01:02:12,565 --> 01:02:15,902
Oh, remember when he said our
boss was trying to kidnap us?
1752
01:02:15,944 --> 01:02:17,445
-He did?
-(laughter)
1753
01:02:17,487 --> 01:02:20,031
TED SR.: Or that his baby
brother could walk and talk
1754
01:02:20,073 --> 01:02:21,700
but only when
we weren't looking.
1755
01:02:21,741 --> 01:02:23,034
(laughter)
1756
01:02:23,076 --> 01:02:24,953
("William TellOverture"
playing)
1757
01:02:24,994 --> 01:02:27,831
(chuckling):
Wow. Turn around.
1758
01:02:29,374 --> 01:02:31,042
TABITHA:
That's so Dad.
1759
01:02:31,084 --> 01:02:33,753
You know, Ted was
quite a handful himself.
1760
01:02:33,795 --> 01:02:36,089
-Oh, he could be very...
-TED SR.: Uptight.
1761
01:02:36,131 --> 01:02:37,882
JANICE:
Mm. Yes. High-strung.
1762
01:02:37,924 --> 01:02:40,301
Oh. Remember the time
he sued us?
1763
01:02:40,343 --> 01:02:43,054
-(laughter)
-JANICE: Teenagers. Ugh.
1764
01:02:43,096 --> 01:02:45,306
He really looked up
to his big brother, though.
1765
01:02:45,348 --> 01:02:47,475
-BOTH: He did?
-JANICE: Oh, yeah.
1766
01:02:47,517 --> 01:02:49,310
He wouldn't leave him alone.
1767
01:02:49,352 --> 01:02:50,937
Everything Tim did,
Teddy wanted to do.
1768
01:02:50,979 --> 01:02:52,480
-TABITHA: Really?
-Yeah.
1769
01:02:52,522 --> 01:02:54,607
-Tagalong Teddy, we called him.
-(Tabitha chuckles)
1770
01:02:54,649 --> 01:02:56,776
-JANICE: Well, not to his face.
-TED SR.: No, no.
1771
01:02:56,818 --> 01:02:59,029
Not to his face.
He was very litigious.
1772
01:02:59,070 --> 01:03:01,281
But you know what?
Your dad didn't mind.
1773
01:03:01,322 --> 01:03:03,324
He was so proud
of his little brother.
1774
01:03:03,366 --> 01:03:05,160
-Oh, yeah.
-He loved showing him off.
1775
01:03:05,201 --> 01:03:07,871
TED SR.: Those guys did
everything together.
1776
01:03:07,912 --> 01:03:09,956
JANICE:
They were best friends.
1777
01:03:09,998 --> 01:03:11,708
-Just like you and me.
-(Tina giggling)
1778
01:03:11,750 --> 01:03:13,460
Right, Tina?
1779
01:03:13,501 --> 01:03:14,794
Best friends forever.
1780
01:03:14,836 --> 01:03:16,129
-Tickle monster!
-(Carol chuckles)
1781
01:03:16,171 --> 01:03:18,298
CAROL:
That's so sweet.
1782
01:03:26,014 --> 01:03:27,474
TABITHA:
And this is my closet.
1783
01:03:27,515 --> 01:03:29,309
-TIM: Oh, cool closet.
-And this is my bed.
1784
01:03:29,351 --> 01:03:31,269
-And this is my fish.
-(tapping)
1785
01:03:31,311 --> 01:03:35,023
-Hey, want to see something
really, really cool? -Sure.
1786
01:03:36,024 --> 01:03:37,984
I made this vocalizer
for Dr. Hawking.
1787
01:03:38,026 --> 01:03:39,778
Hey, my old...
1788
01:03:39,819 --> 01:03:41,738
-What did you do?!
-Check this out.
1789
01:03:41,780 --> 01:03:43,907
Say hello, Dr. Hawking.
1790
01:03:44,824 --> 01:03:46,826
ROBOTIC VOICE:
Hell-l-l-l-l...
1791
01:03:46,868 --> 01:03:50,497
(grunts)
Um, he has performance anxiety.
1792
01:03:50,538 --> 01:03:51,915
Mm-hmm. Yep.
1793
01:03:51,956 --> 01:03:53,583
Oh, this is Lamb Lamb.
1794
01:03:53,625 --> 01:03:55,126
Hey, Lamb Lamb.
1795
01:03:55,168 --> 01:03:57,837
That's my galaxy model
right up there on my shelf.
1796
01:03:57,879 --> 01:04:00,048
My scientist of the week award.
1797
01:04:00,090 --> 01:04:01,925
-Wow.
-My geode rock collection.
1798
01:04:01,966 --> 01:04:03,510
And my telescope.
1799
01:04:03,551 --> 01:04:04,678
Sweet.
1800
01:04:04,719 --> 01:04:07,013
-Hey, cool guitar.
-Yeah.
1801
01:04:07,055 --> 01:04:08,056
That's my dad's.
1802
01:04:08,098 --> 01:04:09,933
Cool dad. (grunts)
1803
01:04:09,974 --> 01:04:11,226
Are you okay?
1804
01:04:11,267 --> 01:04:13,520
Yeah, I'm a lot taller
in my mind.
1805
01:04:13,561 --> 01:04:16,731
Hey, if you want,
I can help you with your song.
1806
01:04:16,773 --> 01:04:19,025
No, you can't.
1807
01:04:19,067 --> 01:04:20,694
-Your ears will bleed.
-Oh, please.
1808
01:04:20,735 --> 01:04:22,362
It'll be fun.
1809
01:04:22,404 --> 01:04:24,948
How about this one?
It's a classic.
1810
01:04:24,989 --> 01:04:27,033
(sighs)
Do we have to?
1811
01:04:27,075 --> 01:04:29,369
Come on. Let's try.
1812
01:04:30,370 --> 01:04:32,122
Okay.
1813
01:04:33,164 --> 01:04:34,749
It's not gonna be good, though.
1814
01:04:34,791 --> 01:04:35,917
No judgment.
1815
01:04:35,959 --> 01:04:37,460
We're just having fun.
1816
01:04:37,502 --> 01:04:39,587
(playing gentle melody)
1817
01:04:42,424 --> 01:04:46,469
(off-key):
* There's no place like home *
1818
01:04:46,511 --> 01:04:48,638
* For the holidays *
1819
01:04:48,680 --> 01:04:50,598
ROBOTIC VOICE:
Please stop.
1820
01:04:50,640 --> 01:04:54,227
-No, stop. Aah...!
-* 'Cause no matter *
1821
01:04:54,269 --> 01:04:56,896
* How far away you roam... *
1822
01:04:56,938 --> 01:04:58,314
(stops playing)
1823
01:04:58,356 --> 01:05:00,066
Good... try.
1824
01:05:00,108 --> 01:05:02,736
Ugh! I just get so nervous.
1825
01:05:02,777 --> 01:05:04,738
(chuckles):
That's okay.
1826
01:05:04,779 --> 01:05:07,240
Listen, all you got to do
1827
01:05:07,282 --> 01:05:10,243
is imagine that
you're inside the song.
1828
01:05:10,285 --> 01:05:14,080
Everything in the lyrics
is actually happening to you.
1829
01:05:14,122 --> 01:05:17,250
And you can see the notes.
1830
01:05:17,292 --> 01:05:20,211
(playing "If You Want
to Sing Out, Sing Out")
1831
01:05:22,130 --> 01:05:25,800
TIM: * Well, if you want
to sing out, sing out *
1832
01:05:25,842 --> 01:05:29,387
* And if you want
to be free, be free *
1833
01:05:29,429 --> 01:05:32,766
-Wow. Whoa! -* 'Cause there's
a million things to be *
1834
01:05:32,807 --> 01:05:35,435
-* You know that there are *
-Whoa. Marcos, wait up.
1835
01:05:35,477 --> 01:05:37,187
-Come on.
-(grunts)
1836
01:05:37,228 --> 01:05:39,439
-* And if you want to sing
high, sing high * -(whimpering)
1837
01:05:39,481 --> 01:05:41,441
-That's a little too high.
-* And if you want *
1838
01:05:41,483 --> 01:05:43,443
-* To sing low, sing low *
-Whoa.
1839
01:05:43,485 --> 01:05:45,111
I got you.
1840
01:05:45,153 --> 01:05:47,364
-* 'Cause there's a million
ways to go * -(gasps)
1841
01:05:47,405 --> 01:05:49,115
* You know that there are *
1842
01:05:49,157 --> 01:05:50,533
OMG, that's a lot.
1843
01:05:50,575 --> 01:05:51,659
(screams)
1844
01:05:51,701 --> 01:05:54,496
* Uh-huh, it's easy *
1845
01:05:54,537 --> 01:05:56,998
-* Uh-huh *
-(screams, laughs)
1846
01:05:57,040 --> 01:05:59,626
* You only need to try *
1847
01:05:59,668 --> 01:06:01,419
(screams, laughs)
1848
01:06:01,461 --> 01:06:03,338
(yelling)
1849
01:06:03,380 --> 01:06:05,548
* You can sing what you want *
1850
01:06:05,590 --> 01:06:07,175
Whoo! Yeah, this is fun!
1851
01:06:07,217 --> 01:06:10,387
-* The opportunity's yours *
-(whooping)
1852
01:06:10,428 --> 01:06:13,473
* And if you do it your way *
1853
01:06:13,515 --> 01:06:14,808
Whoa.
1854
01:06:14,849 --> 01:06:17,143
* You can do it today *
1855
01:06:17,185 --> 01:06:20,021
Marcos, wait. Where are you?
1856
01:06:20,063 --> 01:06:21,648
Come on. You can do it.
1857
01:06:21,690 --> 01:06:24,526
-I can't. I can't.
-(audience cheering)
1858
01:06:24,567 --> 01:06:27,153
* *
1859
01:06:27,195 --> 01:06:28,321
(gasps softly)
1860
01:06:28,363 --> 01:06:30,156
(audience murmuring quietly)
1861
01:06:30,198 --> 01:06:32,450
(panting nervously)
1862
01:06:33,702 --> 01:06:36,996
-Now go for it.
-(audience chattering)
1863
01:06:37,038 --> 01:06:38,832
-* Ah-ah-ah *
-(chatter stops)
1864
01:06:38,873 --> 01:06:41,084
* *
1865
01:06:41,126 --> 01:06:43,628
Whoa. (chuckles)
1866
01:06:46,381 --> 01:06:47,549
Hey.
1867
01:06:47,590 --> 01:06:49,634
* It's easy *
1868
01:06:49,676 --> 01:06:51,052
* Ah-ah-ah *
1869
01:06:51,094 --> 01:06:54,681
* You only need to try *
1870
01:06:54,723 --> 01:06:56,433
TABITHA:
All right. My turn.
1871
01:06:56,474 --> 01:06:58,393
TIM:
Here we go. It's all you.
1872
01:06:58,435 --> 01:07:01,354
* Well, if I want
to sing out, sing out *
1873
01:07:01,396 --> 01:07:03,064
-* Sing out *
-Yes, let it out.
1874
01:07:03,106 --> 01:07:04,983
* And if I want
to be free, be free *
1875
01:07:05,025 --> 01:07:06,359
* Be free *
1876
01:07:06,401 --> 01:07:08,570
* 'Cause there's
a million things to be *
1877
01:07:08,611 --> 01:07:10,947
* I know that there are,
I know that there are *
1878
01:07:10,989 --> 01:07:13,408
-* I know that there are *
-* You know that there are *
1879
01:07:13,450 --> 01:07:16,369
-* I know that there are... *
-* You know that there are... *
1880
01:07:16,411 --> 01:07:19,956
-* I know that there are *
-* You know that there are *
1881
01:07:19,998 --> 01:07:24,085
* I know that there are. *
1882
01:07:27,756 --> 01:07:30,133
Wow. That was so great.
1883
01:07:30,175 --> 01:07:31,676
No, you were so great.
1884
01:07:31,718 --> 01:07:32,844
Thanks, Marcos.
1885
01:07:32,886 --> 01:07:34,262
-(camera clicks)
-What?
1886
01:07:34,304 --> 01:07:35,722
-Oh, that's a keeper.
-Oh, they can see us.
1887
01:07:35,764 --> 01:07:36,931
-They can see us.
-Aw.
1888
01:07:36,973 --> 01:07:38,224
Guys, come on.
1889
01:07:38,266 --> 01:07:40,393
Stop. No, do it. Do it.
1890
01:07:40,435 --> 01:07:42,354
(chuckling):
Oh, no.
1891
01:07:42,395 --> 01:07:44,647
Parents, right? (chuckles)
1892
01:07:44,689 --> 01:07:46,900
-Bye, Templeton family!
-CAROL: Bye-bye.
1893
01:07:46,941 --> 01:07:48,568
-Bye, Marcos.
-Lightspeed.
1894
01:07:48,610 --> 01:07:49,611
Weird kid.
1895
01:07:49,652 --> 01:07:51,321
JANICE:
Yeah, I don't like him.
1896
01:07:51,363 --> 01:07:53,698
(guitar playing softly)
1897
01:07:53,740 --> 01:07:56,326
* Catch my eye *
1898
01:07:57,118 --> 01:07:59,788
* Take my hand *
1899
01:08:00,622 --> 01:08:02,290
* This bond is tighter
than we *
1900
01:08:02,332 --> 01:08:04,000
You go get 'em, Tabitha.
1901
01:08:04,042 --> 01:08:06,169
* Ever planned *
1902
01:08:06,211 --> 01:08:09,047
* Give me courage *
1903
01:08:09,089 --> 01:08:10,674
* So I can land... *
1904
01:08:10,715 --> 01:08:12,258
TINA: Pick up, pick up,pick up, pick up,
1905
01:08:12,300 --> 01:08:13,760
pick up, pick up,
pick up, pick up, pick up,
1906
01:08:13,802 --> 01:08:15,929
pick up, pick up, pick up,
pick up. Choo-choo!
1907
01:08:15,970 --> 01:08:18,264
Don't they understand
it's the fate of the world?
1908
01:08:18,306 --> 01:08:20,350
I've been on hold forever!
1909
01:08:20,392 --> 01:08:22,435
CHILD: All operators
are currently napping.
1910
01:08:22,477 --> 01:08:24,979
I've been on hold so long
I got a tooth growing in.
1911
01:08:25,021 --> 01:08:27,440
Back in my day, we wrote memos.
1912
01:08:27,482 --> 01:08:29,067
That's cute and old-timey.
1913
01:08:29,109 --> 01:08:30,402
(scoffs)
1914
01:08:30,443 --> 01:08:32,445
TED:
I weep for the future.
1915
01:08:32,487 --> 01:08:34,948
Do you want to talk about your
feelings now while I'm on hold?
1916
01:08:34,989 --> 01:08:36,116
I can give you 20 minutes.
1917
01:08:36,157 --> 01:08:37,409
No.
1918
01:08:37,450 --> 01:08:39,035
Let's get to the nut,
the nugget.
1919
01:08:39,077 --> 01:08:40,537
What are you afraid of?
1920
01:08:40,578 --> 01:08:42,997
Sharks, getting shot
in the head with an arrow,
1921
01:08:43,039 --> 01:08:44,416
and... the IRS.
1922
01:08:44,457 --> 01:08:45,959
-That's it.
-There you go.
1923
01:08:46,001 --> 01:08:47,460
Was that so hard?
Baby steps.
1924
01:08:47,502 --> 01:08:49,462
Now, what about being lonely?
1925
01:08:49,504 --> 01:08:51,339
-I'm not lonely.
-Mm-hmm.
1926
01:08:51,381 --> 01:08:53,800
I'm just... alone.
1927
01:08:53,842 --> 01:08:55,301
There's a difference.
1928
01:08:55,343 --> 01:08:56,970
-I think it's time
you read your file. -(gasps)
1929
01:08:57,012 --> 01:08:58,596
-Ah-ah-ah-ah.
-Just give me.
1930
01:08:58,638 --> 01:09:00,015
Whoa. This is it?
1931
01:09:00,056 --> 01:09:02,517
It's so thin.
1932
01:09:02,559 --> 01:09:04,394
YOUNG TIM:
Dear Boss Baby,
1933
01:09:04,436 --> 01:09:06,021
I promise you this:
1934
01:09:06,062 --> 01:09:08,732
Every morning whenyou wake up, I will be there.
1935
01:09:08,773 --> 01:09:11,484
Every night at dinner,I will be there.
1936
01:09:11,526 --> 01:09:13,903
Every birthday party,every Christmas morning,
1937
01:09:13,945 --> 01:09:15,405
I will be there.
1938
01:09:15,447 --> 01:09:18,825
Year after year after year.
1939
01:09:18,867 --> 01:09:23,788
And you and Iwill always be brothers.
1940
01:09:23,830 --> 01:09:25,707
Always.
1941
01:09:25,749 --> 01:09:28,501
Makes me want to make
a sad face.
1942
01:09:28,543 --> 01:09:30,754
(toy train whistle blows)
1943
01:09:33,256 --> 01:09:35,508
We were just kids.
1944
01:09:35,550 --> 01:09:38,094
We didn't know anything
about the real world.
1945
01:09:38,136 --> 01:09:40,638
And eventually,
you have to grow up.
1946
01:09:40,680 --> 01:09:42,891
Just because you grow up,
it doesn't mean
1947
01:09:42,932 --> 01:09:44,434
you have to grow apart.
1948
01:09:44,476 --> 01:09:47,103
I don't know.
Maybe it's already too late.
1949
01:09:47,145 --> 01:09:49,105
TIM (grunting):
Hey.
1950
01:09:49,147 --> 01:09:50,357
Sorry I'm late.
1951
01:09:50,398 --> 01:09:51,941
TINA:
Daddy!
1952
01:09:51,983 --> 01:09:53,151
Daddy, Daddy.
1953
01:09:53,193 --> 01:09:54,402
What's going on?
1954
01:09:54,444 --> 01:09:55,904
Uncle Ted really misses you.
1955
01:09:55,945 --> 01:09:58,281
-Isn't that nice?
-(toy train whistle blows)
1956
01:10:01,076 --> 01:10:03,870
So, hey, uh, what you doing?
1957
01:10:03,912 --> 01:10:05,330
Oh, I was, uh...
1958
01:10:05,372 --> 01:10:08,583
I don't know,
I was just working on this.
1959
01:10:08,625 --> 01:10:10,418
(gasps)
1960
01:10:12,837 --> 01:10:15,632
Look, I'm sorry about
what I said at recess.
1961
01:10:15,674 --> 01:10:18,259
What happens on the playground
stays on the playground.
1962
01:10:18,301 --> 01:10:20,178
I was just worried
about Tabitha, you know?
1963
01:10:20,220 --> 01:10:21,554
She's your daughter. I get it.
1964
01:10:21,596 --> 01:10:23,264
This whole time,
I was thinking about
1965
01:10:23,306 --> 01:10:25,642
what I wanted
and not what she needed.
1966
01:10:25,684 --> 01:10:27,811
I think I finally got this
parenting thing figured out.
1967
01:10:27,852 --> 01:10:28,978
Gold star for you, Daddy.
1968
01:10:29,020 --> 01:10:30,647
-Keep it up, Pops.
-Yeah, well, about that.
1969
01:10:30,689 --> 01:10:33,775
Armstrong wants to get rid
of parents somehow.
1970
01:10:33,817 --> 01:10:36,111
-Sorry, what? -He's planning
a baby revolution.
1971
01:10:36,152 --> 01:10:37,654
Ugh, come on.
1972
01:10:37,696 --> 01:10:39,906
Just when I got good
at this whole parenting thing.
1973
01:10:39,948 --> 01:10:41,408
We got to stop him.
1974
01:10:41,449 --> 01:10:42,992
-Not we.
-You?
1975
01:10:43,034 --> 01:10:44,369
Neither one of us.
1976
01:10:44,411 --> 01:10:46,037
-BabyCorp is taking it
from here. -Ah.
1977
01:10:46,079 --> 01:10:48,206
So, what, they're gonna send in
the Baby SEALS or something?
1978
01:10:48,248 --> 01:10:49,749
-Looks like it.
-So you'll, um...
1979
01:10:49,791 --> 01:10:52,127
you'll be headed back
to your office.
1980
01:10:52,168 --> 01:10:54,421
TED: Uh, yeah.
Well, keep in touch, Tim.
1981
01:10:54,462 --> 01:10:56,256
Hello? BabyCorp?
1982
01:10:56,297 --> 01:10:58,258
Thank goodness, BabyCorp.
Well, BabyCo...
1983
01:10:58,299 --> 01:11:00,510
(stammering):
Wha-What? What are you saying,
1984
01:11:00,552 --> 01:11:02,512
there's not enough evidence,
BabyCorp? I...
1985
01:11:02,554 --> 01:11:04,347
-Uh-oh. -So you're not
gonna do anything?
1986
01:11:04,389 --> 01:11:05,765
But, BabyCorp, I...
1987
01:11:05,807 --> 01:11:07,475
Ugh. Well, then
we'll take care of it.
1988
01:11:07,517 --> 01:11:09,269
You know what, BabyCorp?
1989
01:11:09,310 --> 01:11:10,687
I quit!
1990
01:11:10,729 --> 01:11:12,814
What a bunch of
diaper sniffers. (grunts)
1991
01:11:12,856 --> 01:11:14,566
(whistle blows,
train powers down)
1992
01:11:14,607 --> 01:11:16,776
Looks like we have to stop
Armstrong ourselves.
1993
01:11:16,818 --> 01:11:19,362
We're going rogue.
I like it.
1994
01:11:19,404 --> 01:11:21,031
-So the mission's back on?
-Yeah.
1995
01:11:21,072 --> 01:11:23,825
If you two can put up with
each other a little longer.
1996
01:11:23,867 --> 01:11:27,120
I suppose I can live with that.
Tim?
1997
01:11:27,162 --> 01:11:28,121
I think that's doable.
1998
01:11:28,163 --> 01:11:29,122
Yay!
1999
01:11:29,164 --> 01:11:30,582
Forced together again.
2000
01:11:30,623 --> 01:11:33,376
WIZZIE:
It's 8:45 p.m.
2001
01:11:33,418 --> 01:11:35,462
TED:
Okay. Our clock is ticking.
2002
01:11:35,503 --> 01:11:38,590
We have to stop Armstrong
before the formula wears off.
2003
01:11:38,631 --> 01:11:42,010
Working as a team,
we will strike at the pageant.
2004
01:11:42,052 --> 01:11:43,303
Go, Tina.
2005
01:11:43,345 --> 01:11:45,638
Now, this top secret
document...
2006
01:11:45,680 --> 01:11:47,140
Sweetie, it's the program.
2007
01:11:47,182 --> 01:11:49,476
This top secret program reveals
2008
01:11:49,517 --> 01:11:52,479
that Armstrong is scheduled
to address the audience,
2009
01:11:52,520 --> 01:11:55,565
which he will do right here
at the very end.
2010
01:11:55,607 --> 01:11:58,193
We need someone backstage.
Tim, that's you.
2011
01:11:58,234 --> 01:12:00,862
How am I gonna get backstage
if I'm not in the pageant?
2012
01:12:00,904 --> 01:12:02,739
TED: My people will
take care of that.
2013
01:12:02,781 --> 01:12:03,573
(toy squeaks)
2014
01:12:03,615 --> 01:12:04,991
-Ah!
-Thank you.
2015
01:12:05,033 --> 01:12:06,159
-(chuckles)
-Thank you.
2016
01:12:06,201 --> 01:12:07,243
-No!
-Great.
2017
01:12:07,285 --> 01:12:09,329
-And... go.
-(laughing)
2018
01:12:09,371 --> 01:12:10,789
Glue.
2019
01:12:10,830 --> 01:12:12,665
(screams)
2020
01:12:12,707 --> 01:12:15,001
ROBOT VOICE:
There, there. All better.
2021
01:12:15,043 --> 01:12:16,628
Awesome.
2022
01:12:16,670 --> 01:12:20,090
Now, I'll be your eyes
and your ears in the audience.
2023
01:12:20,131 --> 01:12:22,008
I can't let Mommy see me talk,
2024
01:12:22,050 --> 01:12:23,927
or she's gonna start
squealing and hugging me,
2025
01:12:23,968 --> 01:12:25,679
but these little doodads
will let you
2026
01:12:25,720 --> 01:12:27,514
understand my baby talk.
2027
01:12:27,555 --> 01:12:29,182
It's called a GAGA device.
2028
01:12:29,224 --> 01:12:30,558
-Aw, that's cute.
-Check it out.
2029
01:12:30,600 --> 01:12:31,851
(speaks gibberish)
2030
01:12:31,893 --> 01:12:33,103
(over GAGA):
Can you hear me, Daddy?
2031
01:12:33,144 --> 01:12:34,354
Also cute.
2032
01:12:34,396 --> 01:12:36,439
Meanwhile,
with my new purple status,
2033
01:12:36,481 --> 01:12:38,483
I can stay close to Armstrong.
2034
01:12:38,525 --> 01:12:40,527
Um, that's-that's an eyebrow.
2035
01:12:40,568 --> 01:12:42,529
-Oh. Sorry.
-Uh, no, that's, uh...
2036
01:12:42,570 --> 01:12:44,280
TED:
When the moment is right,
2037
01:12:44,322 --> 01:12:45,907
I'll implant a device.
2038
01:12:45,949 --> 01:12:47,409
-Got it.
-Got what?
2039
01:12:47,450 --> 01:12:48,618
I mean, you've got this.
2040
01:12:48,660 --> 01:12:50,662
Go get 'em, tiger.
(chuckles)
2041
01:12:50,704 --> 01:12:52,622
-Oh, thank you, parents.
-(applause)
2042
01:12:52,664 --> 01:12:54,040
Thank you. There's the...
2043
01:12:54,082 --> 01:12:56,042
There's the old enthusiasm
I like to see.
2044
01:12:56,084 --> 01:12:58,420
TINA: This willallow me to control his suit.
2045
01:12:58,461 --> 01:13:01,881
I can make Muttonchopsdo whatever I want.
2046
01:13:01,923 --> 01:13:03,758
(babbling)
2047
01:13:03,800 --> 01:13:06,177
TINA:
I can make him dance.
2048
01:13:06,219 --> 01:13:07,887
I can make him prance.
2049
01:13:07,929 --> 01:13:09,723
-Hey, no, no, no, no.
-Including exposing himself
2050
01:13:09,764 --> 01:13:11,558
-to the audience.
-(audience gasps)
2051
01:13:11,599 --> 01:13:14,352
-(screams) -Every parentwill pull out their phone.
2052
01:13:14,394 --> 01:13:16,730
Don't look at me.
Don't look at me!
2053
01:13:16,771 --> 01:13:19,357
The photos will spread
like a diaper rash.
2054
01:13:19,399 --> 01:13:21,234
Cut to our pizza party.
2055
01:13:21,276 --> 01:13:23,194
Boom! Bam! Poo! Poof!
2056
01:13:23,236 --> 01:13:24,404
Questions?
2057
01:13:24,446 --> 01:13:25,613
After Tabitha sings
her solo, right?
2058
01:13:25,655 --> 01:13:27,115
After Tabitha sings.
2059
01:13:27,157 --> 01:13:30,785
Now we just sit back, relax
and enjoy the show.
2060
01:13:32,037 --> 01:13:33,580
(fanfare playing)
2061
01:13:33,621 --> 01:13:36,082
ARMSTRONG: Welcome, parents,
to our holiday pageant.
2062
01:13:36,124 --> 01:13:39,586
Remember, flash photography
in the auditorium
2063
01:13:39,627 --> 01:13:42,255
is absolutely okay.
2064
01:13:42,297 --> 01:13:45,050
Take a picture. Show your kids
that you love 'em.
2065
01:13:45,091 --> 01:13:46,593
Yippee!
2066
01:13:46,634 --> 01:13:47,969
Come on, Tim.
2067
01:13:48,011 --> 01:13:50,263
-You promised you'd be here.
-(man groans)
2068
01:13:50,305 --> 01:13:51,765
Oh, sorry. This seat is taken.
2069
01:13:51,806 --> 01:13:53,725
-Yep. Sorry.
-Oh, no. (mutters)
2070
01:13:53,767 --> 01:13:55,977
-So sorry. I... Sorry.
-(man grunts, mutters)
2071
01:13:56,019 --> 01:13:58,104
-Sorry! I am so sorry.
-(speaking gibberish)
2072
01:13:58,146 --> 01:14:00,440
(over GAGA): Uncle Teddy,
are you in position?
2073
01:14:00,482 --> 01:14:01,816
The baby's in the cradle.
2074
01:14:01,858 --> 01:14:04,486
-The baby's in the cradle.
-Mmm. (slurping)
2075
01:14:04,527 --> 01:14:06,112
(speaking gibberish)
2076
01:14:06,154 --> 01:14:08,114
(over GAGA):
Papa Bear, can you read me?
2077
01:14:08,156 --> 01:14:09,741
The flake has landed.
2078
01:14:09,783 --> 01:14:11,826
Places! Places, everybody!
2079
01:14:11,868 --> 01:14:13,203
-Here we go. Here we go.
-Oh, my gosh.
2080
01:14:13,244 --> 01:14:15,121
-It's starting. It's starting.
-(sighs) Finally.
2081
01:14:15,163 --> 01:14:16,706
It's starting. It's starting.
2082
01:14:16,748 --> 01:14:17,999
Yay!
2083
01:14:18,041 --> 01:14:20,126
-You're a big pageant guy, huh?
-No, no, no.
2084
01:14:20,168 --> 01:14:22,671
I'm not talking about the show.
I'm talking about B-Day.
2085
01:14:23,505 --> 01:14:24,881
B-Day?
2086
01:14:24,923 --> 01:14:27,258
Oh, yeah. It's already
in the parents' phones.
2087
01:14:27,300 --> 01:14:29,010
(coughs)
2088
01:14:29,052 --> 01:14:30,804
I taught babies to code.
2089
01:14:30,845 --> 01:14:33,515
TED:
Apps. They're writing apps.
2090
01:14:33,556 --> 01:14:35,725
But my next app...
2091
01:14:35,767 --> 01:14:39,312
ooh, it's gonna change
the world forever.
2092
01:14:39,354 --> 01:14:43,983
QT Snap is the app that's going
to change the world forever?
2093
01:14:44,025 --> 01:14:46,986
Forever starts today.
(chuckles)
2094
01:14:47,028 --> 01:14:49,030
Uh, cool. (gasps)
2095
01:14:49,072 --> 01:14:51,449
(audience gasping)
2096
01:14:51,491 --> 01:14:54,119
* *
2097
01:14:54,160 --> 01:14:55,662
AUDIENCE:
Aw.
2098
01:14:55,704 --> 01:14:57,205
-KIDS: * It's wintertime *
-(Tim mumbling)
2099
01:14:57,247 --> 01:14:58,832
* It's the best time of year *
2100
01:14:58,873 --> 01:15:00,750
* But due to ice caps melting *
2101
01:15:00,792 --> 01:15:02,836
* Global warming's here *
2102
01:15:02,877 --> 01:15:04,671
* It feels like summer *
2103
01:15:04,713 --> 01:15:06,673
* The snow has disappeared *
2104
01:15:06,715 --> 01:15:08,341
* It's all our parents' fault *
2105
01:15:08,383 --> 01:15:11,261
-* So we're all doomed *
-TIM: * All, uh... *
2106
01:15:11,302 --> 01:15:12,721
* Doomed. *
2107
01:15:12,762 --> 01:15:14,347
This is kind of dark.
2108
01:15:14,389 --> 01:15:15,682
Did the kids just say
we're doomed?
2109
01:15:15,724 --> 01:15:17,684
What the heck are we watching?
2110
01:15:17,726 --> 01:15:19,769
-(camera clicks)
-(yelps)
2111
01:15:19,811 --> 01:15:21,521
Their brains are
turning to mush.
2112
01:15:21,563 --> 01:15:23,064
Months of hypnotic research
embedded
2113
01:15:23,106 --> 01:15:25,900
in the most user-friendly
photo app ever made.
2114
01:15:25,942 --> 01:15:27,527
Ooh.
2115
01:15:27,569 --> 01:15:29,612
Now all we need to do
is sit back, relax
2116
01:15:29,654 --> 01:15:31,364
and enjoy the show.
2117
01:15:31,406 --> 01:15:32,741
-WOMAN: Hey!
-Right.
2118
01:15:32,782 --> 01:15:34,909
(chuckles) I'll be right back.
We're, uh...
2119
01:15:34,951 --> 01:15:36,578
-WOMAN: Hey!
-...out of Dundle Floofers.
2120
01:15:36,619 --> 01:15:37,954
-(chuckles)
-Mmm.
2121
01:15:37,996 --> 01:15:39,539
(chuckling)
2122
01:15:39,581 --> 01:15:41,041
KIDS:
Diwali!
2123
01:15:41,082 --> 01:15:42,917
(traditional Hindu music
playing)
2124
01:15:42,959 --> 01:15:44,544
Las Posadas!
2125
01:15:44,586 --> 01:15:46,880
(mariachi music playing)
2126
01:15:46,921 --> 01:15:49,049
-Agnostic!
-(music stops)
2127
01:15:50,258 --> 01:15:52,594
-And Hanukkah!
-(screams)
2128
01:15:52,635 --> 01:15:53,928
Your son is so talented.
2129
01:15:53,970 --> 01:15:56,222
-Oh, so is yours.
-Liars.
2130
01:15:56,264 --> 01:15:58,725
Tina, come in.
B-Day is happening now.
2131
01:15:58,767 --> 01:16:00,268
It's all in the phones.
2132
01:16:00,310 --> 01:16:03,271
Armstrong is using an app
to brainwash the parents.
2133
01:16:03,313 --> 01:16:05,315
-(gasps)
-(over GAGA): Gasp.
2134
01:16:05,357 --> 01:16:07,567
-TED: We have to stop the show.
-(speaking gibberish)
2135
01:16:07,609 --> 01:16:09,152
(over GAGA):
Okay, okay. Uh, there's a...
2136
01:16:09,194 --> 01:16:11,696
there's a big old
no-touchy switch backstage.
2137
01:16:11,738 --> 01:16:13,073
(speaking gibberish)
2138
01:16:13,114 --> 01:16:14,741
(over GAGA): Daddy,
we have to pull the plug.
2139
01:16:14,783 --> 01:16:16,993
Daddy, come in.
Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy,
2140
01:16:17,035 --> 01:16:18,411
Daddy, Daddy, Daddy,
Daddy, Daddy, Daddy.
2141
01:16:18,453 --> 01:16:20,372
Ugh. He's not responding.
2142
01:16:20,413 --> 01:16:21,706
(panting):
Of course not.
2143
01:16:21,748 --> 01:16:23,875
-I'll do it myself.
-Stop!
2144
01:16:23,917 --> 01:16:26,753
-(grunts)
-Theater kids only.
2145
01:16:26,795 --> 01:16:29,089
Oh, come on, nativity!
2146
01:16:29,130 --> 01:16:30,465
Look holier!
2147
01:16:30,507 --> 01:16:31,925
(angelic choir vocalizing)
2148
01:16:31,966 --> 01:16:33,510
(gasps)
2149
01:16:33,551 --> 01:16:35,929
TIM:
Hey, Tabitha.
2150
01:16:35,970 --> 01:16:37,847
(chuckling):
Don't you worry, okay?
2151
01:16:37,889 --> 01:16:39,766
You're gonna be great.
2152
01:16:39,808 --> 01:16:42,060
Thanks, Marcos.
And thanks for all your help.
2153
01:16:42,102 --> 01:16:43,186
Anytime.
2154
01:16:43,228 --> 01:16:45,271
I feel like you really
understand me.
2155
01:16:45,313 --> 01:16:46,940
I'm so excited.
2156
01:16:46,981 --> 01:16:50,735
I can't wait to see the look
on my dad's face when I sing.
2157
01:16:51,695 --> 01:16:53,613
MEGHAN:
Hey! You're on, Templeton!
2158
01:16:53,655 --> 01:16:54,948
Wish me luck.
2159
01:16:54,989 --> 01:16:56,366
MEGHAN:
And break a leg.
2160
01:16:56,408 --> 01:16:57,909
Or two, for that matter.
(laughs)
2161
01:16:57,951 --> 01:17:01,538
KIDS:
* We're in this together *
2162
01:17:01,579 --> 01:17:04,124
* We live in harmony... *
2163
01:17:04,165 --> 01:17:05,375
TED:
Psst.
2164
01:17:06,334 --> 01:17:07,460
Tim!
2165
01:17:07,502 --> 01:17:08,712
Is that the baby Jesus?
2166
01:17:08,753 --> 01:17:10,005
(gasps)
2167
01:17:10,046 --> 01:17:11,256
(screams)
2168
01:17:11,297 --> 01:17:12,966
(laughing)
2169
01:17:13,008 --> 01:17:14,217
* *
2170
01:17:14,259 --> 01:17:17,804
* We have to shut down
the pageant. *
2171
01:17:17,846 --> 01:17:19,723
-Yeah!
-What? No. Why?
2172
01:17:19,764 --> 01:17:22,142
Armstrong's turning
the parents into zombies
2173
01:17:22,183 --> 01:17:23,852
so they'll do
whatever he wants.
2174
01:17:23,893 --> 01:17:25,979
What? What are you doing? No!
2175
01:17:26,021 --> 01:17:27,397
-(grunts)
-(chair crashes)
2176
01:17:27,439 --> 01:17:28,773
Tabitha's on next.
2177
01:17:28,815 --> 01:17:30,775
TED: You'd risk
the future of the world
2178
01:17:30,817 --> 01:17:32,819
-to see your daughter sing?
-Yes!
2179
01:17:32,861 --> 01:17:34,904
-I have to be there for her.
-Look who's worried about
2180
01:17:34,946 --> 01:17:36,531
showing up for things
all of a sudden.
2181
01:17:36,573 --> 01:17:38,158
What's that supposed to mean?
2182
01:17:38,199 --> 01:17:39,826
You didn't even come
to my graduation.
2183
01:17:39,868 --> 01:17:41,286
Ow! Which one?
2184
01:17:41,327 --> 01:17:43,747
Business school, law school.
None of them.
2185
01:17:43,788 --> 01:17:45,498
You didn't even come
to my wedding.
2186
01:17:45,540 --> 01:17:47,250
-Which one?
-I only had one!
2187
01:17:47,292 --> 01:17:48,918
We had a deal, Tim.
2188
01:17:48,960 --> 01:17:50,837
You promised
you'd be there always.
2189
01:17:50,879 --> 01:17:52,422
Whoa. Where did you...
2190
01:17:52,464 --> 01:17:55,050
-Breach of contract!
-(grunts)
2191
01:17:55,884 --> 01:17:57,677
(ninja babies whooping)
2192
01:17:57,719 --> 01:17:58,845
Whoa.
2193
01:17:58,887 --> 01:18:00,180
-Whoa!
-Whoa!
2194
01:18:00,221 --> 01:18:02,599
ARMSTRONG:
How do you do there, fellas?
2195
01:18:02,640 --> 01:18:05,560
(chuckles)
Nothing's gonna ruin my B-Day.
2196
01:18:05,602 --> 01:18:08,146
Not even you.
2197
01:18:08,188 --> 01:18:10,023
-Oh, busted.
-Yeah, it was obvious
2198
01:18:10,065 --> 01:18:11,649
from the very, very beginning
2199
01:18:11,691 --> 01:18:14,319
that you two were
working together.
2200
01:18:14,361 --> 01:18:15,737
What gave us away?
2201
01:18:15,779 --> 01:18:18,031
Well, I'd say the bickering,
2202
01:18:18,073 --> 01:18:19,866
the, uh, petty disputes,
2203
01:18:19,908 --> 01:18:21,534
the jealousy.
2204
01:18:21,576 --> 01:18:24,704
You know, you two are brothers
in every single way.
2205
01:18:24,746 --> 01:18:26,414
(hums a tune)
2206
01:18:26,456 --> 01:18:28,708
-Off to the Box they go.
-(ninja babies yelling)
2207
01:18:28,750 --> 01:18:30,752
What? No.
Not the Box. Not now.
2208
01:18:30,794 --> 01:18:32,379
Please.
2209
01:18:32,420 --> 01:18:34,381
Aw, it's just... it's too bad
that you're never gonna
2210
01:18:34,422 --> 01:18:36,549
have a chance to reboot
your relationship and...
2211
01:18:36,591 --> 01:18:38,510
-No!
-...and restore the closeness
2212
01:18:38,551 --> 01:18:39,886
that you once felt.
2213
01:18:39,928 --> 01:18:41,554
-Sorry about that.
-No.
2214
01:18:41,596 --> 01:18:43,807
-No, no, no, no. No!
-Adios, Marcos.
2215
01:18:43,848 --> 01:18:46,893
* Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh... *
2216
01:18:46,935 --> 01:18:48,770
CAROL:
Oh, look, look. There she is.
2217
01:18:48,812 --> 01:18:49,938
There's our little angel.
2218
01:18:49,979 --> 01:18:51,856
-Oh! Tabby's in the tree.
-Ah! Oh!
2219
01:18:53,358 --> 01:18:55,568
* Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh *
2220
01:18:55,610 --> 01:18:57,362
* Ooh-ooh-ooh... *
2221
01:18:57,404 --> 01:19:00,699
(ninja babies
speaking gibberish, laughing)
2222
01:19:00,740 --> 01:19:02,409
(yells)
2223
01:19:02,450 --> 01:19:04,786
You had one job to do.
2224
01:19:04,828 --> 01:19:06,788
One job.
2225
01:19:06,830 --> 01:19:08,790
-Oh, no.
-The fountain.
2226
01:19:08,832 --> 01:19:10,458
It's flooding the room.
2227
01:19:10,500 --> 01:19:11,835
This isn't a time-out.
2228
01:19:11,876 --> 01:19:13,253
It's game over.
2229
01:19:13,294 --> 01:19:15,338
* Ooh-ooh *
2230
01:19:15,380 --> 01:19:17,674
* Ooh-ooh-ooh *
2231
01:19:17,716 --> 01:19:20,468
(panting)
2232
01:19:23,054 --> 01:19:24,431
MEGHAN:
Psst.
2233
01:19:24,472 --> 01:19:28,059
It's one, two, three
and one, two, three.
2234
01:19:28,101 --> 01:19:30,311
-(gasps, pants)
-(piano playing)
2235
01:19:39,446 --> 01:19:41,948
* Catch my eye *
2236
01:19:41,990 --> 01:19:45,118
* Take my hand *
2237
01:19:45,160 --> 01:19:50,457
* This bond is tighter
than we ever planned *
2238
01:19:50,498 --> 01:19:52,834
* Give me courage *
2239
01:19:52,876 --> 01:19:55,295
* So I can land *
2240
01:19:55,337 --> 01:19:58,840
* We know that
divided we'll fall *
2241
01:19:58,882 --> 01:20:02,927
* So together we stand *
2242
01:20:03,887 --> 01:20:06,848
* Laugh and cry with me *
2243
01:20:06,890 --> 01:20:09,517
* Fly that high with me *
2244
01:20:09,559 --> 01:20:11,686
-* See the sunset
and the sunrise * -(gasping)
2245
01:20:11,728 --> 01:20:14,356
-* The world looks so good
through our eyes * -Wow.
2246
01:20:14,397 --> 01:20:19,361
* Like the moon
and stars at night *
2247
01:20:20,987 --> 01:20:23,031
You're right. I blew it.
2248
01:20:23,073 --> 01:20:25,158
I ruined the mission.
(sighs)
2249
01:20:25,200 --> 01:20:27,077
And I'm a terrible father.
2250
01:20:27,118 --> 01:20:30,080
Hey, you did sort of
ruin the mission.
2251
01:20:30,121 --> 01:20:31,706
But you're a great dad.
2252
01:20:31,748 --> 01:20:33,166
No, I'm not.
2253
01:20:33,208 --> 01:20:34,793
I could never do your job.
2254
01:20:34,834 --> 01:20:36,378
I mean, you work
around the clock,
2255
01:20:36,419 --> 01:20:38,088
you can't even quit
if you wanted to,
2256
01:20:38,129 --> 01:20:39,714
and you don't even get paid.
2257
01:20:39,756 --> 01:20:42,092
Frankly, I don't see
how that's legal.
2258
01:20:42,133 --> 01:20:44,260
I was always jealous of you.
2259
01:20:44,302 --> 01:20:46,721
I wanted to be successful,
too, you know.
2260
01:20:46,763 --> 01:20:48,056
Sure, Tim.
2261
01:20:48,098 --> 01:20:50,433
I made a lot of money...
2262
01:20:50,475 --> 01:20:52,560
but you made a family.
2263
01:20:53,645 --> 01:20:55,689
The truth is...
2264
01:20:55,730 --> 01:20:57,649
it's lonely at the top.
2265
01:21:00,985 --> 01:21:03,697
* Reach with me *
2266
01:21:03,738 --> 01:21:07,033
* See the sky *
2267
01:21:07,075 --> 01:21:11,788
* I'll always be here
for the rest of your life *
2268
01:21:11,830 --> 01:21:14,791
* Sail that ocean *
2269
01:21:14,833 --> 01:21:17,210
* Find that sand *
2270
01:21:17,252 --> 01:21:20,797
* We know that
divided we'll fall *
2271
01:21:20,839 --> 01:21:24,843
* So together we stand *
2272
01:21:24,884 --> 01:21:27,095
(kids vocalizing)
2273
01:21:30,265 --> 01:21:34,185
You know, I'm... I'm sorry we
don't see each other anymore.
2274
01:21:34,227 --> 01:21:36,229
A very wise person
once told me,
2275
01:21:36,271 --> 01:21:38,064
just because you grow up
2276
01:21:38,106 --> 01:21:40,066
doesn't mean
you have to grow apart.
2277
01:21:40,108 --> 01:21:41,609
-Was it Tina?
-Oh, yeah.
2278
01:21:41,651 --> 01:21:44,571
(laughing): Oh, it is crazy
how smart she is.
2279
01:21:44,612 --> 01:21:46,823
It's like she looks
right into your soul.
2280
01:21:46,865 --> 01:21:49,743
I'm sorry that I missed
your graduations.
2281
01:21:49,784 --> 01:21:52,454
I'm sorry I missed
your one wedding.
2282
01:21:52,495 --> 01:21:55,749
BOTH: I'm sorry
I wasn't there for you.
2283
01:21:55,790 --> 01:21:58,668
* Side by side *
2284
01:21:58,710 --> 01:22:01,338
* Hand in hand *
2285
01:22:01,379 --> 01:22:06,217
* We speak a language
no one else can understand *
2286
01:22:06,259 --> 01:22:09,179
-* Hear those cheers *
-(cameras clicking)
2287
01:22:09,220 --> 01:22:11,473
* Strike up the band *
2288
01:22:11,514 --> 01:22:15,977
* We know that
divided we'll fall *
2289
01:22:16,019 --> 01:22:23,193
* So together we stand. *
2290
01:22:25,862 --> 01:22:27,030
(chuckles)
2291
01:22:27,072 --> 01:22:29,115
(panting)
2292
01:22:32,744 --> 01:22:34,746
(pants, whimpers)
2293
01:22:34,788 --> 01:22:37,165
(one person clapping)
2294
01:22:38,875 --> 01:22:41,503
(hyperventilating)
2295
01:22:41,544 --> 01:22:43,797
(crying)
2296
01:22:43,838 --> 01:22:45,840
Oh, Tabitha.
2297
01:22:45,882 --> 01:22:47,300
(gasps) Gramps?
2298
01:22:47,342 --> 01:22:49,010
Nana? Mom?
2299
01:22:49,052 --> 01:22:50,178
Oh, no!
2300
01:22:50,220 --> 01:22:52,097
-(grunts)
-Oh, my gosh, Tabitha.
2301
01:22:52,138 --> 01:22:53,973
You did such a great job.
2302
01:22:54,015 --> 01:22:57,227
Well, that's just
horribly rude of you all.
2303
01:22:57,268 --> 01:22:58,561
Come on, everybody.
2304
01:22:58,603 --> 01:23:02,440
Uh, how about
a standing ovation?
2305
01:23:02,482 --> 01:23:05,402
-(laughs) Very good.
-(Tina gasps)
2306
01:23:05,443 --> 01:23:07,028
They're zombies!
2307
01:23:07,070 --> 01:23:08,738
We did it!
2308
01:23:08,780 --> 01:23:12,659
-The baby revolution has begun.
-(babies cheering, laughing)
2309
01:23:12,701 --> 01:23:14,994
No more need for costumes.
2310
01:23:15,036 --> 01:23:16,913
(yells, laughs)
2311
01:23:16,955 --> 01:23:19,124
Who wants cake?
2312
01:23:20,041 --> 01:23:21,501
Oh, my gosh.
2313
01:23:21,543 --> 01:23:24,087
ARMSTRONG:
Happy B-Day, everybody.
2314
01:23:24,129 --> 01:23:26,131
Daddy, Uncle Ted.
2315
01:23:26,172 --> 01:23:27,716
Come in. Where are you?
2316
01:23:27,757 --> 01:23:30,051
(crying)
2317
01:23:31,678 --> 01:23:33,680
* *
2318
01:23:33,722 --> 01:23:36,016
(door opens, closes)
2319
01:23:36,057 --> 01:23:38,059
(sniffles)
2320
01:23:38,101 --> 01:23:40,061
TINA:
Here you go, sis.
2321
01:23:40,103 --> 01:23:42,605
Now, I already used this,
so I know it's safe.
2322
01:23:42,647 --> 01:23:44,399
Thanks.
2323
01:23:45,775 --> 01:23:48,319
Wait. Are you t-talking?
2324
01:23:48,361 --> 01:23:50,321
(chuckling): I know.
It's pretty weird, isn't it?
2325
01:23:50,363 --> 01:23:52,574
(screams)
Oh, my gosh, you're talking!
2326
01:23:52,615 --> 01:23:54,034
It's an emergency.
2327
01:23:54,075 --> 01:23:56,369
I'm on a supersecret mission
from BabyCorp.
2328
01:23:56,411 --> 01:23:57,370
(gasps)
2329
01:23:57,412 --> 01:23:59,789
You mean Dad's stories
are true?
2330
01:23:59,831 --> 01:24:01,708
That's what the suit says.
2331
01:24:01,750 --> 01:24:02,917
How do I look?
2332
01:24:02,959 --> 01:24:04,336
No way!
2333
01:24:04,377 --> 01:24:06,379
Now, I can't get ahold
of Dad or Uncle Ted,
2334
01:24:06,421 --> 01:24:08,298
so I need your help, big sis.
2335
01:24:08,340 --> 01:24:09,924
Wait, wait.
Dad's here?
2336
01:24:09,966 --> 01:24:11,426
They've been here
the whole time.
2337
01:24:11,468 --> 01:24:13,386
-Where? -I don't have
much time to explain,
2338
01:24:13,428 --> 01:24:15,764
but Dr. Armstrong is a baby.
2339
01:24:15,805 --> 01:24:17,724
A very bad, bad baby.
2340
01:24:17,766 --> 01:24:21,603
Soon, the world is
gonna be our playground.
2341
01:24:21,644 --> 01:24:24,064
-Whee! (grunts) -("Push It"
by Salt-N-Pepa playing)
2342
01:24:24,105 --> 01:24:25,440
(laughs)
2343
01:24:25,482 --> 01:24:27,817
Now we can make parents
do whatever we want.
2344
01:24:27,859 --> 01:24:29,944
Awesome! Yeah!
2345
01:24:29,986 --> 01:24:32,906
No more rules.
2346
01:24:32,947 --> 01:24:35,617
Sayonara, Mama and Papa.
2347
01:24:35,658 --> 01:24:36,951
Yeah.
2348
01:24:36,993 --> 01:24:38,078
(babies laughing)
2349
01:24:38,119 --> 01:24:39,412
-Mom?
-Dad?
2350
01:24:39,454 --> 01:24:40,413
Grandpa?
2351
01:24:40,455 --> 01:24:42,123
Whoa. Are you kidding me?
2352
01:24:42,165 --> 01:24:44,250
We need to shut it down
before it goes global.
2353
01:24:44,292 --> 01:24:46,419
-ARMSTRONG: Yeah. (laughs)
-What are we gonna do?
2354
01:24:46,461 --> 01:24:48,672
Okay, we need to find
the big whatchamacallit
2355
01:24:48,713 --> 01:24:50,298
that controls
the parents' phones.
2356
01:24:50,340 --> 01:24:51,841
-The server.
-Yes. Yes.
2357
01:24:51,883 --> 01:24:54,010
Is there a big one
of those whatsits at school?
2358
01:24:54,052 --> 01:24:55,595
Uh, let's see.
2359
01:24:55,637 --> 01:24:58,765
Well, servers get really hot,
so you need air ducts.
2360
01:24:58,807 --> 01:25:00,100
TINA:
Now you're thinking!
2361
01:25:00,141 --> 01:25:02,310
TABITHA:
Which intersect at the acorn!
2362
01:25:02,352 --> 01:25:04,646
-A-plus!
-Come on.
2363
01:25:04,688 --> 01:25:06,106
-This way.
-(gasps)
2364
01:25:06,147 --> 01:25:08,358
Opportunity knocks.
2365
01:25:08,400 --> 01:25:10,944
First, we need to make
a quick pit stop.
2366
01:25:10,985 --> 01:25:14,280
AUTOMATED VOICE (distorted):
Your time has concluded.
2367
01:25:14,322 --> 01:25:16,449
-(both panting)
-It looks like this is it, Tim.
2368
01:25:16,491 --> 01:25:18,785
Well, hey, at least we have
2369
01:25:18,827 --> 01:25:22,455
these last final
precious moments together.
2370
01:25:23,665 --> 01:25:25,875
Precious. Precious!
2371
01:25:25,917 --> 01:25:28,336
(whistling)
2372
01:25:29,129 --> 01:25:30,880
-* *
-(whinnies)
2373
01:25:32,090 --> 01:25:35,135
-Oh, right. Precious. Precious!
-(continues whistling)
2374
01:25:35,176 --> 01:25:37,303
* *
2375
01:25:38,555 --> 01:25:40,682
-(Ted continues whistling)
-(Tim sputtering)
2376
01:25:44,019 --> 01:25:46,438
(whistling and sputtering
continue)
2377
01:25:47,939 --> 01:25:50,191
(banging on glass)
2378
01:25:55,739 --> 01:25:57,157
(both gasping)
2379
01:25:57,198 --> 01:25:58,783
(grunts)
2380
01:25:59,743 --> 01:26:00,910
(coughing)
2381
01:26:00,952 --> 01:26:01,911
(whinnies)
2382
01:26:01,953 --> 01:26:03,997
That's my girl.
2383
01:26:04,039 --> 01:26:05,165
Thank you.
2384
01:26:05,206 --> 01:26:07,167
(sputters, spits)
2385
01:26:07,208 --> 01:26:08,418
(gasps) Tina?
2386
01:26:08,460 --> 01:26:09,836
Tina, Tina, come in.
It's Daddy.
2387
01:26:09,878 --> 01:26:12,213
Daddy! Listen, we have
to shut down the server.
2388
01:26:12,255 --> 01:26:14,007
-It's in the acorn.
-Whoa.
2389
01:26:14,049 --> 01:26:15,675
This is so weird.
2390
01:26:15,717 --> 01:26:16,968
I call shotgun.
2391
01:26:17,010 --> 01:26:18,053
Quick, to the acorn!
2392
01:26:18,094 --> 01:26:19,637
-TED: Hyah!
-(neighing)
2393
01:26:20,805 --> 01:26:22,349
BOTH:
Yeehaw!
2394
01:26:22,390 --> 01:26:24,184
Hold on to your chaps, pal.
2395
01:26:24,225 --> 01:26:25,268
-(ninja baby shouts)
-Whoa!
2396
01:26:25,310 --> 01:26:27,562
(all whooping)
2397
01:26:30,899 --> 01:26:32,901
-(screams)
-Oh, no!
2398
01:26:33,902 --> 01:26:36,029
Glue! (laughs)
2399
01:26:36,071 --> 01:26:38,531
Yah! Pixie dust! Aha.
2400
01:26:38,573 --> 01:26:39,949
-Yeah, baby. -Yes.
-(whinnies)
2401
01:26:39,991 --> 01:26:42,285
(babbling)
2402
01:26:42,327 --> 01:26:43,912
(eerie chuckling)
2403
01:26:43,953 --> 01:26:45,830
(shouts)
2404
01:26:45,872 --> 01:26:47,791
(eerie chuckling)
2405
01:26:47,832 --> 01:26:49,209
Wha...?
2406
01:26:49,250 --> 01:26:51,419
CREEPY GIRL:
Where'd I go?
2407
01:26:52,253 --> 01:26:54,547
-Whoa!
-I like your pajamas.
2408
01:26:54,589 --> 01:26:55,423
(screams)
2409
01:26:55,465 --> 01:26:58,718
(ninja babies crying)
2410
01:26:58,760 --> 01:27:00,428
Where are you going?
2411
01:27:00,470 --> 01:27:01,888
-Hyah!
-(whooping)
2412
01:27:01,930 --> 01:27:03,765
-Glue.
-TED: I'm proud to be a yellow.
2413
01:27:03,807 --> 01:27:05,058
I like your pony.
2414
01:27:05,100 --> 01:27:06,101
(both scream)
2415
01:27:06,142 --> 01:27:07,394
Thank you.
2416
01:27:07,435 --> 01:27:09,396
-(crying)
-ARMSTRONG (over radio): What?
2417
01:27:09,437 --> 01:27:12,315
Ah, ah, ah. No, no, no.
2418
01:27:14,025 --> 01:27:16,111
(whirring)
2419
01:27:16,152 --> 01:27:19,364
Now let's crack that big nut.
(grunts)
2420
01:27:20,240 --> 01:27:22,534
Oh, no.
It's about to go worldwide.
2421
01:27:22,575 --> 01:27:24,786
How are we gonna get up there?
2422
01:27:25,787 --> 01:27:27,497
-Really?
-ARMSTRONG: Well, you got grit.
2423
01:27:27,539 --> 01:27:29,124
I'll give you that.
2424
01:27:29,165 --> 01:27:31,167
Gumption, even. Very admirable.
2425
01:27:31,209 --> 01:27:33,336
And yet, uh, annoying.
2426
01:27:33,378 --> 01:27:35,588
Quite annoying. Yeah.
2427
01:27:35,630 --> 01:27:38,174
I'm gonna have to,
you know, uh, stop you.
2428
01:27:38,216 --> 01:27:39,426
Glue me, glue me, glue me.
2429
01:27:39,467 --> 01:27:40,969
Precious, sic him.
2430
01:27:41,011 --> 01:27:42,303
You're too little and too late.
2431
01:27:42,345 --> 01:27:44,431
-(clang)
-Ah, ba-bad dog.
2432
01:27:44,472 --> 01:27:47,767
-Pets aren't allowed in school.
-Aah! Precious!
2433
01:27:49,269 --> 01:27:50,937
And you, my pudgy protégé.
2434
01:27:50,979 --> 01:27:52,272
Go, go, go, go! Move! Move!
2435
01:27:52,313 --> 01:27:54,274
-I offered you the world.
-(both yell)
2436
01:27:54,315 --> 01:27:55,734
-We could have been partners.
-(groaning)
2437
01:27:55,775 --> 01:27:57,610
I've got something better
than a partner.
2438
01:27:57,652 --> 01:27:59,696
-I have a brother.
-Yeah!
2439
01:27:59,738 --> 01:28:01,906
-(grunts) Let go.
-No, you let go.
2440
01:28:01,948 --> 01:28:04,117
Wow. Point taken.
2441
01:28:04,159 --> 01:28:05,827
What? What's going on?
2442
01:28:06,995 --> 01:28:09,205
(yelling)
2443
01:28:09,247 --> 01:28:10,457
Hey, that's my leisure suit.
2444
01:28:10,498 --> 01:28:11,875
It looks better on her.
2445
01:28:11,916 --> 01:28:13,376
Hands up, diapers down.
2446
01:28:13,418 --> 01:28:14,794
Things are about to get weird.
2447
01:28:14,836 --> 01:28:16,504
-Yeah, that's my girls!
-(Ted laughs)
2448
01:28:16,546 --> 01:28:18,465
-That's really Dad?
-Yep.
2449
01:28:18,506 --> 01:28:20,675
I said a lot of stuff
to that kid.
2450
01:28:20,717 --> 01:28:22,469
Well, quite the family reunion.
2451
01:28:22,510 --> 01:28:23,928
Uh, the more the merrier.
2452
01:28:23,970 --> 01:28:26,097
-I say let's call your parents.
-TIM: Oh, no.
2453
01:28:26,139 --> 01:28:27,474
(zombielike murmuring)
2454
01:28:27,515 --> 01:28:29,309
-Uh-oh.
-Okay.
2455
01:28:29,351 --> 01:28:31,644
Mommy and Daddy,
let's hug 'em-- to death.
2456
01:28:31,686 --> 01:28:33,563
Oh, don't worry about us.
Get to the server.
2457
01:28:33,605 --> 01:28:35,482
-Go, Tina, go!
-(whoops)
2458
01:28:35,523 --> 01:28:38,526
-(Armstrong stammering)
-(Tina grunts, yells)
2459
01:28:38,568 --> 01:28:40,362
-Hey!
-You got this, Tina.
2460
01:28:40,403 --> 01:28:41,738
Get down from there.
2461
01:28:41,780 --> 01:28:43,490
TED:
Go for his lollies!
2462
01:28:43,531 --> 01:28:45,825
Never touch another man's pony.
2463
01:28:45,867 --> 01:28:46,910
(all grunt)
2464
01:28:46,951 --> 01:28:49,287
Here. Stick around.
Stick around.
2465
01:28:49,329 --> 01:28:51,706
Uh, Tim, what do we do now?!
2466
01:28:51,748 --> 01:28:53,667
Don't move.
Maybe they won't see us.
2467
01:28:53,708 --> 01:28:55,335
TED:
They see us, Tim. They see us.
2468
01:28:55,377 --> 01:28:56,711
TIM:
Did you move? I didn't move.
2469
01:28:56,753 --> 01:28:58,171
-TED: Really, Tim?
-(grunting)
2470
01:28:58,213 --> 01:29:00,006
Oh. Hey, that's a little
too high now.
2471
01:29:00,048 --> 01:29:02,842
Don't look down.
Look straight ahead, okay?
2472
01:29:02,884 --> 01:29:04,719
(grunts, whimpers)
2473
01:29:04,761 --> 01:29:06,388
-(buzzer sounds)
-It's locked.
2474
01:29:06,429 --> 01:29:08,181
Can I give you a hand?
2475
01:29:08,223 --> 01:29:09,474
Of course,
I mean that facetiously,
2476
01:29:09,516 --> 01:29:12,185
because the hand acts as a...
as a key.
2477
01:29:12,227 --> 01:29:13,520
No, no. No, no, no.
2478
01:29:13,561 --> 01:29:15,230
-Hey, hey. No, no, no, no.
-Thanks, sis.
2479
01:29:15,271 --> 01:29:17,524
(grunts)
Stay away from my server.
2480
01:29:17,565 --> 01:29:19,025
-(yells)
-(grunts)
2481
01:29:19,067 --> 01:29:20,527
-Shut it down, Tabitha.
-What are you doing?
2482
01:29:20,568 --> 01:29:22,445
What are you doing?
No, no, no! No!
2483
01:29:22,487 --> 01:29:24,197
Don't do that.
2484
01:29:24,239 --> 01:29:25,573
-Oh, no!
-(zombielike grunting)
2485
01:29:25,615 --> 01:29:27,200
-Hugs.
-Hug Grandpa.
2486
01:29:27,242 --> 01:29:28,785
It's Night ofthe Living Boomers.
2487
01:29:28,827 --> 01:29:31,871
-Dad, stop! (screams)
-ADULTS: Hugs.
2488
01:29:31,913 --> 01:29:32,956
(yells)
2489
01:29:32,997 --> 01:29:34,374
(grunts, gasps)
2490
01:29:34,416 --> 01:29:36,543
(groans) Back.
Back, you little monsters.
2491
01:29:36,584 --> 01:29:38,962
-You back off, candy pants.
-(yells, grunts)
2492
01:29:39,004 --> 01:29:40,130
(screams)
2493
01:29:40,171 --> 01:29:42,215
Ha! Got your nose.
2494
01:29:42,257 --> 01:29:43,591
(grunting)
2495
01:29:43,633 --> 01:29:46,052
Oh, right in the breadbasket!
2496
01:29:46,094 --> 01:29:48,221
(both grunting rapidly)
2497
01:29:48,263 --> 01:29:50,932
(both babbling)
2498
01:29:53,518 --> 01:29:54,769
-Ow!
-Ha!
2499
01:29:54,811 --> 01:29:56,229
-Knocked his block off.
-Ah, poopy.
2500
01:29:56,271 --> 01:29:58,064
Tina, I think I got it. Yes!
2501
01:29:58,106 --> 01:30:00,233
Don't hit that button.
Don't hit that button. Aah!
2502
01:30:00,275 --> 01:30:02,068
Ow! Ooh!
2503
01:30:02,110 --> 01:30:04,779
-And... enter.
-ARMSTRONG: No, no! Stop it!
2504
01:30:04,821 --> 01:30:06,823
-(screams)
-Cut it out. (mutters)
2505
01:30:06,865 --> 01:30:09,617
-Look what you made me do.
-(gasps) The fire alarm.
2506
01:30:09,659 --> 01:30:11,411
-ARMSTRONG: Darn it.
-TABITHA: Dad!
2507
01:30:11,453 --> 01:30:13,788
Uncle Ted!
Pull the fire alarm!
2508
01:30:13,830 --> 01:30:15,415
-The girls need help.
-TED: No kissies!
2509
01:30:15,457 --> 01:30:17,709
The girls need us. (grunts)
2510
01:30:17,751 --> 01:30:20,545
-(alarm ringing)
-(grunts) Time's up, halflings.
2511
01:30:20,587 --> 01:30:23,590
(sputters)
Great galloping gargoyles!
2512
01:30:23,631 --> 01:30:27,093
-(Ted screaming)
-WIZZIE: What? What?
2513
01:30:27,135 --> 01:30:29,346
Tim! Get to the fire alarm!
2514
01:30:29,387 --> 01:30:30,805
I'll hold them back.
2515
01:30:30,847 --> 01:30:33,099
TED:
Make it rain, baby.
2516
01:30:33,141 --> 01:30:34,434
TIM:
I'm on it.
2517
01:30:34,476 --> 01:30:35,894
What's the matter?
2518
01:30:35,935 --> 01:30:37,479
(voice cracks): You can't
handle the awkward phase?
2519
01:30:37,520 --> 01:30:38,605
(whimpering)
2520
01:30:38,646 --> 01:30:40,982
Go, Marcos... uh, Dad. Go!
2521
01:30:41,024 --> 01:30:42,484
-(gasps)
-I'm back!
2522
01:30:42,525 --> 01:30:43,985
-Here we go.
-Come on.
2523
01:30:44,027 --> 01:30:46,112
How about another round,
you tough guy? Come on!
2524
01:30:46,154 --> 01:30:47,530
Ow. Stop it.
2525
01:30:47,572 --> 01:30:48,948
I still got these.
(grunting)
2526
01:30:48,990 --> 01:30:50,617
TABITHA:
You put my sister down.
2527
01:30:50,658 --> 01:30:53,828
B-Day will happen,
whether you like it or not.
2528
01:30:53,870 --> 01:30:56,122
-You shall not pass!
-(zombielike murmuring)
2529
01:30:56,164 --> 01:30:58,041
Uh, you shall not pass.
2530
01:30:58,083 --> 01:30:59,751
No! Stop passing.
2531
01:30:59,793 --> 01:31:01,461
-(grunts)
-(fire alarm ringing)
2532
01:31:01,503 --> 01:31:02,712
Yeah, Dad!
2533
01:31:02,754 --> 01:31:04,172
Way to go! (whoops)
2534
01:31:04,214 --> 01:31:06,299
-(alarm stops)
-(Tabitha gasps)
2535
01:31:06,341 --> 01:31:07,884
TABITHA:
That's it?
2536
01:31:07,926 --> 01:31:10,178
That's right. Why? What?
The school's expensive.
2537
01:31:10,220 --> 01:31:13,306
-I had to cut costs someplace.
-(both grunt)
2538
01:31:13,348 --> 01:31:14,474
Oh, no. It's not working.
2539
01:31:14,516 --> 01:31:15,642
Did you pull it right?
2540
01:31:15,684 --> 01:31:16,976
How else you gonna pull it?
2541
01:31:17,018 --> 01:31:19,020
ARMSTRONG (laughs):
You'll see I'm right.
2542
01:31:19,062 --> 01:31:20,647
I'll show everybody.
2543
01:31:20,689 --> 01:31:23,817
The age of parents is over.
2544
01:31:23,858 --> 01:31:26,277
(babies cooing, murmuring)
2545
01:31:28,697 --> 01:31:31,157
ARMSTRONG:
Yay, yay, yay. (sighs)
2546
01:31:31,199 --> 01:31:33,827
How about you watch me
have a little toast?
2547
01:31:33,868 --> 01:31:37,122
To the baby revolution
and to me.
2548
01:31:37,163 --> 01:31:38,581
(gasps)
2549
01:31:40,709 --> 01:31:42,627
-It's time for the
candy volcano... -Mmm, mmm.
2550
01:31:42,669 --> 01:31:44,504
-Oh, that's good.
-TABITHA and TINA: Of doom!
2551
01:31:44,546 --> 01:31:46,506
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
2552
01:31:46,548 --> 01:31:48,008
No, no, no! No!
2553
01:31:48,049 --> 01:31:50,510
(yells)
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
2554
01:31:50,552 --> 01:31:52,178
-No, no, no.
-Boom shakalaka?
2555
01:31:52,220 --> 01:31:53,847
-Boom!
-Don't do that!
2556
01:31:53,888 --> 01:31:56,141
-(crackling, sizzling)
-(screaming)
2557
01:31:56,182 --> 01:31:58,435
(both grunt)
2558
01:31:58,476 --> 01:32:00,729
-Whoa!
-(screaming)
2559
01:32:00,770 --> 01:32:02,355
-(grunts)
-TINA: Oh, no!
2560
01:32:02,397 --> 01:32:03,857
-Tabitha!
-(Armstrong grunting)
2561
01:32:03,898 --> 01:32:04,858
(grunts)
2562
01:32:04,899 --> 01:32:06,735
No! Someone help me, please!
2563
01:32:06,776 --> 01:32:08,695
Tabitha, hang on!
2564
01:32:08,737 --> 01:32:11,031
Ted, I need upsies-- now.
2565
01:32:11,072 --> 01:32:12,782
(both grunt)
2566
01:32:12,824 --> 01:32:15,785
-(yelps, grunts)
-(Tabitha screaming)
2567
01:32:17,537 --> 01:32:19,205
Dad, help me!
2568
01:32:19,247 --> 01:32:20,331
Look at you.
2569
01:32:20,373 --> 01:32:22,208
You're smart. You're strong.
2570
01:32:22,250 --> 01:32:23,543
You don't need parents.
2571
01:32:23,585 --> 01:32:25,587
What can they possibly
offer you?
2572
01:32:25,628 --> 01:32:28,048
-How about unconditional love?
-(gasps, yells)
2573
01:32:28,089 --> 01:32:29,799
-That's what.
-No, no, no. No.
2574
01:32:29,841 --> 01:32:32,010
-Sayonara.
-No, no, no. No. (screams)
2575
01:32:33,595 --> 01:32:36,222
-(grunts)
-(Armstrong screams, whimpers)
2576
01:32:36,264 --> 01:32:37,599
TIM:
Tabitha!
2577
01:32:37,640 --> 01:32:39,392
(strained grunting)
2578
01:32:39,434 --> 01:32:41,353
(yells)
2579
01:32:41,394 --> 01:32:43,021
-I'm gonna fall!
-Tabitha!
2580
01:32:43,063 --> 01:32:44,230
Hang on!
2581
01:32:44,272 --> 01:32:45,607
(screams)
2582
01:32:45,648 --> 01:32:47,942
I got you. I got you.
2583
01:32:47,984 --> 01:32:49,778
(both sigh)
2584
01:32:49,819 --> 01:32:52,030
I got you, Tabitha.
2585
01:32:52,072 --> 01:32:54,657
(panting)
2586
01:32:54,699 --> 01:32:56,618
I got you.
2587
01:32:56,659 --> 01:32:59,162
That's my big brother.
2588
01:32:59,954 --> 01:33:02,957
Thanks, Marcos Lightspeed.
2589
01:33:05,001 --> 01:33:06,628
Mwah.
2590
01:33:07,462 --> 01:33:09,464
I thought we both
had to grow up.
2591
01:33:09,506 --> 01:33:11,925
Well, let's not
grow up too fast.
2592
01:33:11,966 --> 01:33:13,426
(sighs)
2593
01:33:13,468 --> 01:33:14,844
I love you, Dad.
2594
01:33:14,886 --> 01:33:16,763
I love you, Tabitha Templeton.
2595
01:33:16,805 --> 01:33:18,973
Aw. You see that?
2596
01:33:19,015 --> 01:33:21,267
And you wanted
to take it all away.
2597
01:33:21,309 --> 01:33:22,769
-Where you going?
-Home.
2598
01:33:22,811 --> 01:33:25,647
You know, Doc,
childhood doesn't last forever,
2599
01:33:25,689 --> 01:33:27,524
but family sure does.
2600
01:33:27,565 --> 01:33:29,275
Uncle Ted! Heads up!
2601
01:33:29,317 --> 01:33:31,069
-(screams, grunts)
-Woo-hoo!
2602
01:33:31,111 --> 01:33:33,446
We win! Get ready
to order some pizzas.
2603
01:33:33,488 --> 01:33:35,740
(Ted chuckling)
2604
01:33:37,659 --> 01:33:39,953
* *
2605
01:33:42,706 --> 01:33:44,290
(babies gasping)
2606
01:33:44,332 --> 01:33:45,917
(cheering)
2607
01:33:45,959 --> 01:33:47,043
Woo-hoo!
2608
01:33:47,085 --> 01:33:49,212
-(squeals)
-Cool! (laughs)
2609
01:33:50,338 --> 01:33:52,507
-(gasps)
-(murmuring)
2610
01:33:52,549 --> 01:33:54,551
(Wizzie laughing)
2611
01:33:54,592 --> 01:33:57,012
Huzzah! (laughs)
2612
01:33:57,053 --> 01:33:59,097
Huzzah!
2613
01:34:01,349 --> 01:34:03,601
-(sighs, grunts)
-(applause)
2614
01:34:03,643 --> 01:34:05,895
(cheering)
2615
01:34:08,189 --> 01:34:09,566
Oh, sweet.
2616
01:34:09,607 --> 01:34:11,651
He who findeth keepeth.
2617
01:34:11,693 --> 01:34:13,153
(clears throat)
2618
01:34:13,194 --> 01:34:14,237
(kids cheering)
2619
01:34:14,279 --> 01:34:17,699
Mommy, Daddy,
I missed you so much.
2620
01:34:17,741 --> 01:34:20,118
Ooh, ooh, ooh. Yay!
2621
01:34:20,160 --> 01:34:21,327
Junior!
2622
01:34:21,369 --> 01:34:23,121
-Glue!
-(Jimbo yelps)
2623
01:34:23,163 --> 01:34:25,248
So soft.
2624
01:34:25,290 --> 01:34:26,708
Where are we going?
2625
01:34:26,750 --> 01:34:28,001
Not bad, Templetons.
2626
01:34:28,043 --> 01:34:29,753
Woo-hoo! Yay, Templetons.
2627
01:34:29,794 --> 01:34:31,254
Yeah, mission accomplished.
2628
01:34:31,296 --> 01:34:34,424
And as a bonus,
we stopped Armstrong, too.
2629
01:34:34,466 --> 01:34:35,967
-Huh?
-What?
2630
01:34:36,009 --> 01:34:38,845
My real mission was
getting you two back together.
2631
01:34:38,887 --> 01:34:41,681
-A-plus! See me after class.
-(Tabitha chuckles)
2632
01:34:41,723 --> 01:34:43,433
Wait, so you never
actually quit?
2633
01:34:43,475 --> 01:34:44,684
-Nope.
-Huh.
2634
01:34:44,726 --> 01:34:45,852
Well played.
2635
01:34:45,894 --> 01:34:47,187
I don't like to mix the two,
2636
01:34:47,228 --> 01:34:48,730
but I will say
it was never business.
2637
01:34:48,772 --> 01:34:50,273
It was always personal.
2638
01:34:50,315 --> 01:34:51,649
You know what, kid?
2639
01:34:51,691 --> 01:34:53,943
You're the best boss
I ever had.
2640
01:34:53,985 --> 01:34:55,570
-Thank you, chief.
-(Tabitha chuckles)
2641
01:34:55,612 --> 01:34:57,197
CAROL:
Tim! You actually made it.
2642
01:34:57,238 --> 01:34:59,407
-Yeah.
-I mean, I knew you'd make it.
2643
01:34:59,449 --> 01:35:01,076
-Teddy.
-Teddy, you're here.
2644
01:35:01,117 --> 01:35:03,244
-And look what you're wearing.
-Uh...
2645
01:35:03,286 --> 01:35:05,205
Sweetheart, I cried.
2646
01:35:05,246 --> 01:35:06,373
Then I went blank.
2647
01:35:06,414 --> 01:35:08,166
Oh, come on.
Every-Everyone get together.
2648
01:35:08,208 --> 01:35:10,043
This... We got to get this.
Here we go.
2649
01:35:10,085 --> 01:35:11,711
-Dad, no! -No!
-What?
2650
01:35:11,753 --> 01:35:13,213
(camera clicks)
2651
01:35:13,254 --> 01:35:14,339
(guitar playing)
2652
01:35:14,381 --> 01:35:15,632
TABITHA:
* We know that *
2653
01:35:15,674 --> 01:35:17,509
* Divided we'll fall *
2654
01:35:17,550 --> 01:35:22,931
* So together we stand *
2655
01:35:24,933 --> 01:35:27,727
* We know that
divided we'll fall *
2656
01:35:27,769 --> 01:35:29,437
(camera clicks)
2657
01:35:29,479 --> 01:35:35,235
* So together we stand. *
2658
01:35:35,276 --> 01:35:37,112
-Yay, Tabitha!
-That was beautiful!
2659
01:35:37,153 --> 01:35:39,114
-The crowd goes wild!
-(Tina laughing)
2660
01:35:39,155 --> 01:35:41,408
(chuckles)
Thank you. Thank you.
2661
01:35:41,449 --> 01:35:42,742
-(whinnies)
-Aah!
2662
01:35:42,784 --> 01:35:44,411
Aw, hey, Precious.
2663
01:35:44,452 --> 01:35:45,787
(chuckles) You're amazing.
2664
01:35:45,829 --> 01:35:47,664
Oh, I wish Teddy
could have been here.
2665
01:35:47,706 --> 01:35:49,749
Yeah, I know. Me, too.
2666
01:35:49,791 --> 01:35:51,584
-(doorbell rings)
-(gasps)
2667
01:35:51,626 --> 01:35:53,461
-Hmm.
-(squealing)
2668
01:35:55,630 --> 01:35:57,257
Hey, I was just...
2669
01:36:03,930 --> 01:36:05,890
TED:
Merry Christmas, Tim.
2670
01:36:05,932 --> 01:36:08,101
I'm sorry I couldn'tbe there with you,
2671
01:36:08,143 --> 01:36:10,437
but please enjoy this
2672
01:36:10,478 --> 01:36:13,148
inappropriately lavish giftinstead.
2673
01:36:18,820 --> 01:36:22,115
You've given methe greatest gift of all.
2674
01:36:22,157 --> 01:36:23,825
-You.
-(chuckles)
2675
01:36:23,867 --> 01:36:27,287
Love, the best brotherin the world.
2676
01:36:27,328 --> 01:36:29,622
P.S. Duck.
2677
01:36:29,664 --> 01:36:31,458
(shouts)
2678
01:36:31,499 --> 01:36:34,127
(groaning, spitting)
2679
01:36:34,169 --> 01:36:35,462
In your face, Leslie!
2680
01:36:35,503 --> 01:36:37,255
(chuckling):
Hey. Oh, it is on, Lindsey!
2681
01:36:37,297 --> 01:36:39,758
-No. No, no, no, no. Don't,
don't, don't. -Come here!
2682
01:36:39,799 --> 01:36:40,967
I'm younger than you.
2683
01:36:41,009 --> 01:36:42,385
You're a bigger target.
2684
01:36:42,427 --> 01:36:43,970
-(laughs) I got you so good!
-(Ted grunts)
2685
01:36:44,012 --> 01:36:45,472
-(laughing)
-TED: No, you didn't.
2686
01:36:45,513 --> 01:36:46,806
Aah! You missed me!
2687
01:36:46,848 --> 01:36:48,475
Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
2688
01:36:48,516 --> 01:36:49,893
-Ambush.
-Exactly.
2689
01:36:49,934 --> 01:36:51,353
-TIM: Ow!
-TED: Sneak attack!
2690
01:36:51,394 --> 01:36:53,480
Oh, isn't it great
to see them fighting again?
2691
01:36:53,521 --> 01:36:54,814
(sighs) Finally.
2692
01:36:54,856 --> 01:36:56,483
(toy phone ringing)
2693
01:36:57,817 --> 01:36:59,527
Shouldn't you pick up?
2694
01:36:59,569 --> 01:37:01,488
Nah, we got some
family business.
2695
01:37:01,529 --> 01:37:03,031
Woo-hoo! Yeah!
2696
01:37:03,073 --> 01:37:05,200
-(Carol gasps)
-(ringing continues)
2697
01:37:07,786 --> 01:37:10,372
CHILD (on phone): Tina, we have
another assignment for you.
2698
01:37:10,413 --> 01:37:12,123
(gasps, whispers):
I'm listening.
2699
01:37:12,165 --> 01:37:14,167
JANICE:
Grandma's coming in hot!
2700
01:37:14,209 --> 01:37:16,753
-You want some of Grandpa?
-Everyone, get Tagalong Teddy!
2701
01:37:16,795 --> 01:37:18,505
-TIM: It's true.
-Gotcha!
2702
01:37:18,546 --> 01:37:20,215
You can't stop time.
2703
01:37:20,256 --> 01:37:22,592
But every once in a while,you get a second chance.
2704
01:37:22,634 --> 01:37:24,386
-TABITHA: I'm gonna get you!
-(Precious neighs)
2705
01:37:24,427 --> 01:37:26,054
TIM: So, even thoughyou're only a kid once...
2706
01:37:26,096 --> 01:37:27,889
well, unless you getto be a kid twice,
2707
01:37:27,931 --> 01:37:30,141
which is really weird,to be honest,
2708
01:37:30,183 --> 01:37:33,144
but the point isyou have to grow up sometime.
2709
01:37:33,186 --> 01:37:35,397
-(Wizzie laughing)
-(camera clicks)
2710
01:37:35,438 --> 01:37:38,149
And you should alwaysbe nice to your brother.
2711
01:37:38,191 --> 01:37:40,235
TINA: Ah,that was really sweet, Daddy.
2712
01:37:40,276 --> 01:37:42,112
That'll be great for my report.
2713
01:37:42,153 --> 01:37:44,322
TIM:
Okay, so... so that's it, then.
2714
01:37:44,364 --> 01:37:47,075
TINA: Well, actually,there's one more little thing.
2715
01:37:48,702 --> 01:37:50,954
* *
2716
01:37:59,879 --> 01:38:01,464
(door opens)
2717
01:38:02,590 --> 01:38:04,634
Mama? Papa?
2718
01:38:04,676 --> 01:38:05,969
DAD:
Wha...
2719
01:38:06,011 --> 01:38:09,097
-(gasps) Oh, my son.
-(mom gasping)
2720
01:38:09,139 --> 01:38:11,558
-(dad sobbing)
-(mom laughing)
2721
01:38:11,599 --> 01:38:13,685
MOM:
You came home.
2722
01:38:13,727 --> 01:38:15,729
TIM:
Oh, yeah. Right.
2723
01:38:15,770 --> 01:38:17,564
TINA:
Okay, Pops. Now.
2724
01:38:17,605 --> 01:38:19,858
TIM:
The end.
2725
01:38:19,899 --> 01:38:23,111
("Together We Stand" playing)
2726
01:38:31,911 --> 01:38:34,164
(children's chorus vocalizing)
2727
01:39:03,985 --> 01:39:06,196
* *
2728
01:39:15,663 --> 01:39:18,458
TABITHA:
* Catch my eye *
2729
01:39:18,500 --> 01:39:21,252
* Take my hand *
2730
01:39:21,294 --> 01:39:26,633
* This bond is tighter
than we ever planned *
2731
01:39:26,675 --> 01:39:29,052
* Give me courage *
2732
01:39:29,094 --> 01:39:31,429
* So I can land *
2733
01:39:31,471 --> 01:39:35,016
* We know that
divided we'll fall *
2734
01:39:35,058 --> 01:39:39,104
* So together we stand *
2735
01:39:40,188 --> 01:39:42,774
* Climb with me *
2736
01:39:42,816 --> 01:39:45,819
* Share my dreams *
2737
01:39:45,860 --> 01:39:47,612
* Tomorrow's brighter *
2738
01:39:47,654 --> 01:39:50,907
* Than it's ever been *
2739
01:39:50,949 --> 01:39:53,660
* Fear no danger *
2740
01:39:53,702 --> 01:39:56,037
* Make big plans *
2741
01:39:56,079 --> 01:39:59,708
* We know that
divided we'll fall *
2742
01:39:59,749 --> 01:40:04,629
* So together we stand *
2743
01:40:04,671 --> 01:40:07,799
* Laugh and cry with me *
2744
01:40:07,841 --> 01:40:10,051
* Fly that high with me *
2745
01:40:10,093 --> 01:40:13,013
* See the sunset
and the sunrise *
2746
01:40:13,054 --> 01:40:15,724
* The world looks so good
through our eyes *
2747
01:40:15,765 --> 01:40:17,600
* Like the moon *
2748
01:40:17,642 --> 01:40:19,811
* And stars at night *
2749
01:40:21,062 --> 01:40:23,815
* Rest your head *
2750
01:40:23,857 --> 01:40:26,526
* Tell me your thoughts *
2751
01:40:26,568 --> 01:40:29,779
* Everything I have
and call mine *
2752
01:40:29,821 --> 01:40:31,948
* Is all yours *
2753
01:40:31,990 --> 01:40:34,743
* Sail that ocean *
2754
01:40:34,784 --> 01:40:37,203
* Find that sand *
2755
01:40:37,245 --> 01:40:40,707
* We know that
divided we'll fall *
2756
01:40:40,749 --> 01:40:45,045
* So together we stand *
2757
01:40:45,086 --> 01:40:47,339
(children's chorus vocalizing)
2758
01:41:04,731 --> 01:41:07,275
* Reach with me *
2759
01:41:07,317 --> 01:41:10,362
* See the sky *
2760
01:41:10,403 --> 01:41:15,575
* I'll always be here
for the rest of your life *
2761
01:41:15,617 --> 01:41:18,286
* Side by side *
2762
01:41:18,328 --> 01:41:20,914
* Hand in hand *
2763
01:41:20,955 --> 01:41:26,670
* We speak a language
no one else can understand *
2764
01:41:26,711 --> 01:41:29,172
* Hear those cheers *
2765
01:41:29,214 --> 01:41:31,633
* Strike up the band *
2766
01:41:31,675 --> 01:41:35,053
* We know that
divided we'll fall *
2767
01:41:35,095 --> 01:41:40,600
* So together we stand *
2768
01:41:42,310 --> 01:41:44,145
* We know that *
2769
01:41:44,187 --> 01:41:46,773
* Divided we'll fall *
2770
01:41:46,815 --> 01:41:53,988
* So together we stand. *
2771
01:41:54,030 --> 01:41:56,825
(song ends)
2772
01:41:56,866 --> 01:41:59,160
* *
2773
01:42:16,344 --> 01:42:18,638
(chorus vocalizing)
2774
01:42:28,898 --> 01:42:31,192
* *
2775
01:43:00,930 --> 01:43:03,224
* *
2776
01:43:32,962 --> 01:43:35,256
* *
2777
01:44:04,994 --> 01:44:07,288
* *
2778
01:44:37,027 --> 01:44:39,320
* *
2779
01:45:09,059 --> 01:45:11,353
* *
2780
01:45:41,091 --> 01:45:43,385
* *
2781
01:46:13,123 --> 01:46:15,417
* *
2782
01:46:45,155 --> 01:46:47,449
* *
2783
01:47:10,972 --> 01:47:12,974
(music fades)
180836
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
