All language subtitles for Foursome s04e02 The Fourth Season.eng

"The Fourth Season." Huh.

"Joshua and Andrea
have been waiting

fall, winter, spring,

and now, the fourth season--

summer!"

Woman: ? Will you fight for me ?

? Like I'll fight for you? ?

Shaw: "The star-crossed lovers

had been anticipating
this fiery culmination.

What sweeter time than dawn
to commence such an act?

Joshua quivers in suspense.

Andrea heaves with nerves.

The forbidden fruit
must be tasted,

and this moment must be perfect.

'Be gentle with
your swollen staff

for my secret
center is fragile.'

'I shall try, Andrea,

but my molten member

carries all of my desires.'

Alas, it wasn't yet meant to be.

Andrea bit her tongue
in nervous anticipation

and Joshua's minty
elixir stings her sore.

Regrettably the burning
caresses are halted

as Joshua was spanked
by Andrea's rouge.

It's almost as if
Andrea and Joshua

don't want to plunge
over the crest.

By why? They've dallied
for four seasons."

You know what? Can you not?

Shut the up.

God.

That wasn't exactly how I
pictured our first attempt going.

Yeah, I just feel like I
was trying way too hard.

I just want it to be perfect.

Andie,
the best part about you and me

is that it's never been perfect.

You don't have to do
anything to impress me.

I think you're sexy in a
typical T-shirt and jeans.

You sound like a country song,

but I'm into it.

You're into it.

Next time we try,
can we just be us?

A hundred percent
you is all I want.

I have one more request
for the next time we try.

Mm-hmm, anything.

It's gotta be in my room.

Those are creep city.

You don't like them?

No.

Oh.

What about number 41?

We could update swimming
in the watering hole

to skinny-dipping
in Reuben's hole.

No, no, no, no, no, number 41

got me into major misfortune.

I thought it would be funny to
put dye in the swimming pool

and Smurf everybody's skin.

And it was.
I laughed till I cried.

But, for real,
felt really bad about it later.

Lawless Lucy,
no one cares about your troubles.

- You will respect me, Dakota.
- Don't hold your breath.

Dakota. Wynn's a part of this.
Climb aboard.

Or I could climb off board.

No, you made me dance in public.

I'm very excited for what
else you have in store for me.

You're a part of my fun.
You stay.

I know it's a complement,
but I sounds like a threat.

I've got it.
Number 69-- kiss and tell.

Ooh, I remember that.

That's when we decided to
have our very first smooches.

Smooches. Who was I?

Oh, yeah, that one didn't
get me into any hot water,

and this week doing the list

has been pretty
drama free for me,

so I'm horny. Let's do it.

The most popping
part about number 69

is 69-ing,
then coming back here,

to scribe in the
kiss-and-tell book.

No, me first, me first.

"'Wynn's Romp.'

Today my moms went to buy
a new used PT Cruiser,

and I snuck off and met Roy.

He kept blowing all over me.

It was so hot.

Finally I deflated Roy

so he would stop being so
wacky with his inflatable arms.

Once he was limp,

I kissed him.

Hard!

It took me almost a
year to get over Roy.

It's like, 'Just call, man!'"

God Almighty.
"'Dakota's Delight.'

Skipped history to
make my own history.

Ordered Simon into
the quiet room

for a saucy Simon Says.

Got my virgin lips locked

and I closed my eyes and thought
of Jonathan Taylor Thomas

while he gave me my first handy,

blowy, backwards
banjo, fluff and fold,

wiggly trombone,
and bon app�tit."

My first kiss was with Alec.

You are not Courtney.

Give me this.

"'Andie's Adventure.'

Alec and Josh had a sleepover.

I waited up until Josh fell asleep
on the floor of our living room

and knew I had to act fast.

I crept over and gave
him a quick peck.

He woke up and I pretended
I was sleep walking.

It scared him so much,
he went home early."

Man, you kind of lip
violated your boyfriend.

Eesh,
even Wynn's entry is better.

No wonder I won the kiss crown.

I wouldn't get too comfy
holding that crown, Dakota,

because I'm coming for it.

Literally.

I'm not the same little loser

who's bro-blocked her bajingo.

I've had men and I've got a man,

so let's upgrade this shit to...

Bang and Babble.

And while we're at it,

let's make that kiss
crown the climax cap.

We may have a new tiara,

but the competition
remains the same.

Let's talk terms.

Peen points should be given to the
best bang in various categories.

Things like
adventurous locations,

copulate with a cop,

number of partners,

how fast you blast,

and sucking on school property,

will score you
extra peen points.

The person with the
most peen points

wins the climax cap.

I may be new to the gang
and new to the bang,

but I am putting
my vag in the ring.

Speaking of rings,
I just stuck a Nuva in

and I got mad hormones!

No one's gonna take
my bone throne.

I'm the only queen in this tree,

and that's exactly
how it'll stay.

I'm about to smosh Josh
for the first time,

and you better believe the
underdog's about to do doggy.

I'm going to win because
I'm loco!

- Yeah.
- Sounds about right.

True.

Let's go bang and babble!

But first, summer school.

What?
No trouble means not ditching.

Didn't you graduate?

Why aren't you using
this precious time

to get your precious crown?

Why aren't you out there
boning and moaning?

Because my boyfriend's in this
class, you choad.

Are you using me, D?

- I'm in.
- Where is Shaw?

Let's get this show on the
road, people.

I've got a crown to
win and someone to do.

Something to do.

Hey, looks like we're in
the same class together.

That's gonna be fun.

Yeah, just making in some time

to see my friends and
Josh, my boyfriend.

Yeah, I know who he is.

He's the guy you publicly
chose instead of me

when I sang you a song in
front of the whole school.

Yeah, well, you know,
to be fair you did make...

A bet. Yeah, I know. I remember.

Yeah, Kent,
we said we were cool.

Yeah, but then we didn't really
talk for the rest of the year, so...

Well, let's start now.

Any slammin' summer plannin'?

No, not really, except for
getting the hell out of here. You?

Oh, we're just doing
this old list thing

from when we were kids.

It's no big deal.

Losing your love virginity

to the man you were
always meant to be with

is not big deal?

You're serving major
laissez-fair realness.

Right, that summer plan

is really making me wanna focus

on my summer plan,

which is getting the
hell out of here.

so... ...bye.

Probably a little too
much info for my ex, yeah?

What can I say? I care.

No one "She's All
Thats" my BF's BFF.

That's sweet,
though I hope I'm more

than just your BF's BFF.

We'll see.

I'll take what I can get.

Oh, this class needs
to finish quickly

so I can, too.

Mama's in heat and
not the good kind.

Where the is the AC?

It is I.

Whoa, there.

Your instructor's here
with bated breath.

Tonight you're mine
with the first unit

of our summer
English curriculum--

romance novels.

Now, the romance genre-- whoo--

is often forgotten,

but it's an extremely
important cornerstone

in American literature

and the paper-book economy.

Ew.

You guys,
you'll like it as much as I did.

"The Fourth Season."

It's about two
star-crossed lovers

who spent the first
chapters of the series

split apart by an evil sibling.

Jealous lovers,

obnoxious sidekicks.

But, now, after all this time,

these two lovers
can be together.

Kent! Get up here.

Grab a stack and pass
out these paperbacks.

And we'll take turns reading.
We'll do popcorn style.

Mm, it'll be as delicious
as that salty snack.

- Hey, Mr. Shaw.
- Hey.

You know I was a senior, right?

Like, I should've graduated.

They said I had one
more credit left,

and I've already done this
class, so...

I'm actually shocked
that you're asking this.

I mean,
it should be perfectly clear

why I failed you.

Buddy, you don't speak English.

And this is an English class.

Australians speak English.

Then why don't I understand
anything you're saying?

- What?
- What?

- Y-You-- what?
- What?

- I'm just gonna...
- I wish there were subtitles.

Oh, my God.

Where was I? Oh, yes.

"Andrea had to leave Joshua

to meet her instructor Stefan."

"Andrea was to face off

the fiery saloon
strumpet Winifred."

'Winifred and Andrea

are joined by the loose-lipped
town harlot Daphne."

Why I gotta be the girl?

"The tantalizing trio
sized each other up.

Shaw: "As the lesson
went on and on,

Andrea and her floozies' minds

never strayed from the
joust ahead of them."

"They yearned to ride and ride

and unleash their
deep throbbing passion

for sport within."

"Unable to restrain
her fancy any longer,

Andrea took off to her true
love, Joshua,

for their long-awaited
lovemaking."

I hate this book.

"And the joust at the
babble brook commenced."

- The crown is mine!
- "The crown."

We haven't gotten
to that part yet.

I'm so pleased you
all read ahead.

Woman: ? Will you fight for me ?

? Like I'll fight for you? ?

Shaw: "Joshua and Andrea
dared to dive in again.

Joshua presses his muscular
chest towards Andrea with gusto,

enveloping her in his
sweet, masculine nectar.

Andrea returns his favor,

thrusting her top-heavy weight

onto her tiptoes to
meet his urgent thrust."

Joshua: Put your whole
fist in my mouth.

What?

I love it when you
speak French to me.

Huh? What?

I don't know what you're saying.

Whisper into it.

Hey there, what can I get you?

A tall glass of you.

Court?

I'll take you straight up.

Damn,
I'm a naughty little honeybee.

- You on the logs?
- I'm all over this log.

Reuben and I detoured to
the cafeteria after class.

That kitchen went from
grade A to grade swole.

I found out what his
mystery meat was,

and let's just say, don't use the
five-second rule if you dropped your fork.

Well, give me the book because this
entry is about to be way wackier

and much bendier than Roy.

Oh, yeah.

Let me see that.

You lost your virgini--

That's right. This bing-bong

had never been boinked.

Dakota: What?

I was more virgin than Mary

because, let's be honest,

that chick got knocked up.

Now that I'm out
of Catholic school

and at an age where
people can't go to jail

for real time,
for enjoying my eggs,

I figured I'd nail
getting nailed.

You know,
even though you won 20 peens

'cause you got your angel
wings clipped and clapped,

this race ain't over.

This may have started with Andie
strong-arming me into listing,

but I'm having fun
and keeping it level.

Keeping it level?

You lost your cherry
to a random stranger.

Either way, I'm gonna be
doubling those dongs. You heard?

Voulez who?

You whispered into what?

Yeah, it was not exactly

how I pictured our
first attempt going.

- Attempt?
- We didn't exactly seal the deal yet,

as we're still
working out the kinks,

- emphasis on kink.
- I totally get it.

My first time wasn't
what I expected either.

What?
Wynn, you lost your virginity?

- Shall I go get a cake?
- Already ate some.

Read the entry.

I just gave in to
the newness of it

and really went for it.

And it was a blast!

I can't wait to
plow and chow again.

You know what?

I'm gonna win it and wing it.

I'm gonna un-prude my 'tude

and go full cream
ahead with Josh.

Get ready for me
to claim that cap.

She's about to get loaded up on
peens, isn't she?

Didn't think she had it in her.

Time to step up my bang game.

Woman: ? Will you fight for me ?

? Like I'll fight for you? ?

Shaw: "Andrea,
with newfound vigor,

caresses Joshua's mane

as every muscle in
her cave tautens.

Joshua is delighted
by her dominance.

He repays her kiss with the
force of a thousand armies.

Shh.

Ooh, you stretching?

Yeah, just gotta get
limber for the sex.

Catch me with your.

Wait. What?

Whoa!

Will you fight for me ?

? Like I'll fight for you? ?

- Eat me.
- Yeah, you just gotta move the salami.

Nope, not better.

No, I don't like this.

Yeah.

Let it go, you ho!
I have to make an entry!

You need to load up
on your Jesus wafers

'cause you freak--

Reuben and I plowed through
a Wendy's drive-through.

The vehicle was not in park.

When we finished,
we drove away without paying.

Well,
I went to the Rare Scare Fair,

where I found a hot dog vender

and we recreated the movie
"Fear" in a roller coaster.

That cream coaster provided
high-octane thrills

at speeds of up to
69 miles per hour,

and that's exactly how
fast my cooch was clacking.

and the seatbelts were broken!

We sword fought at the movies,

front row center,

bathroom stalls,

behind an open concession stand.

I made my own movie,

front row in my center,

while eating concessions

in a bathroom stall!

I will win that crown, Dakota,

and you'll be
forced to respect me

because I care a lot about what
people think about me, okay?

That's never going to happen.

You'll never win.

"Wynn" is my middle name

and also my first name.

- So did you--
- No.

- Did you?
- Definitely not.

- Did you--
- Well, just--

I know I told you to be a
hundred percent yourself, but I--

Andie, that was not
a hundred percent me.

I got nervous,
and, I don't know.

I had all these ideas that I
always wanted to try with you,

and they all just
came out super jumbled

and just out of control.

Was that a hundred percent you?

No, not even close.

I just got really caught
up in this list item

and trying to get peen points

because I kissed you when
you were asleep and I was 10,

and I just wanted to prove
myself, but once I got going,

- I couldn't reel myself back in. You know?
- Wait. What?

Foursome stuff.

You included me in
the Foursome list.

Yeah.

Look, Josh,
I think maybe for our first time,

we should dial it back to a zero

instead of an upside-down 69.

Yeah.

Maybe we could try missionary?

Never heard of it.

Look, as much as I wanna
stay with you right now,

can we push pause?

We're about to crown the
best bang in Babbler.

Babbler?

You're not gonna tell the Foursome
about any of this, are you?

No, of course not.

Okay, cool.

And then I said,
"Catch me with your ,"

and he did.

- Wow, he did.
- That's so cool.

Thanks for the enthusiasm, guys.

Only had a major
transformation, but no big.

Major transformation?

I can't even tell if you actually
got banged from your babble.

Yeah, was there actual
penetration or nah?

A hard nah.

There was too much
going on in between,

but we'll try again.

I gotta go ice my gooch.

Let's just get down to the good stuff.
Who won?

Tied! How?

If you guys would just quit
arguing for one second,

you'd realize that you're
more alike than you think.

My turn.

Yes! I won. Redemption is mine.

- Congratulations.
- I'm so happy for you.

Courtney?

I thought she was
still in Finland.

Guys, Courtney and
I got back together.

Isn't that wonderful?

I'm back in the group.

You know that's Mae, right?

Mae: Oh, yeah!

So when's the next special
day for you and Josh?

Valentine's Day? Flag Day?
You're birthday?

We know how you guys love to
wait for the right moment.

Soon, real soon.

Shaw: Andrea and
Joshua's tale isn't over,

not by a long, thick, hard,

throbbing, massive shot.

Girl,
what the you doing?

Where this ring come from?

The end.

Well, this is
inappropriate for class.

Man: Ya think?

Shaw, the episode ended,
like, 10 seconds ago.

Leave.

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