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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,966 --> 00:00:09,676 [upbeat music] 2 00:00:09,718 --> 00:00:12,048 - Now, this is the Hell 2.0 I wanted! 3 00:00:12,095 --> 00:00:15,305 Families meeting new people together, individually. 4 00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:17,598 All thanks to "Chit Chat." - What's "Chit Chat"? 5 00:00:17,642 --> 00:00:20,982 - My new social media app! Aren't you using it? 6 00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:24,111 - Banana! In the boot! 7 00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:26,939 - That game is... wicked cool! 8 00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:28,025 [chuckles] 9 00:00:28,069 --> 00:00:29,819 But Chit Chat's the top banana. 10 00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,413 I just made eight new friends on it! 11 00:00:31,448 --> 00:00:33,948 - Nobody's heard of Chit Chat, father. 12 00:00:33,992 --> 00:00:35,452 - Nonsense! It's so popular, 13 00:00:35,493 --> 00:00:38,753 you'd think it was Rainbow Dash at a Bronies convention. 14 00:00:38,788 --> 00:00:40,208 It's not popular at all! 15 00:00:40,248 --> 00:00:42,248 It's like a less famous, uh... 16 00:00:42,292 --> 00:00:45,462 "My Little Pony"... at a Bronies convention. 17 00:00:45,503 --> 00:00:47,593 Oh, I kind of trapped myself in a simile. 18 00:00:47,630 --> 00:00:49,550 I couldn't get myself out of there. 19 00:00:49,591 --> 00:00:52,841 - Yeah! - Banana! In the boot! 20 00:00:52,886 --> 00:00:55,806 [eerie music] 21 00:00:55,847 --> 00:01:02,807 * * 22 00:01:12,864 --> 00:01:14,454 [horns honking] 23 00:01:15,283 --> 00:01:16,623 - Call to action, team! 24 00:01:16,659 --> 00:01:18,699 We pushed the slogan, "Show me your chits," 25 00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:20,155 and it bombed. 26 00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:22,615 Like Svengallop at a Bronies convention. 27 00:01:22,665 --> 00:01:24,125 - I warned you against that slogan. 28 00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:26,497 - No time for apologies, Beans. 29 00:01:28,338 --> 00:01:29,918 We gotta pump those numbers up! 30 00:01:29,964 --> 00:01:31,224 Those are rookie numbers. 31 00:01:31,257 --> 00:01:32,507 - "Wolf of Wall Street." 32 00:01:32,550 --> 00:01:34,470 - Falling back in love with you, buddy. 33 00:01:34,511 --> 00:01:37,311 - Sir, if I may fix Beans' unconscionable failure, 34 00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:40,677 you should just order people to use Chit Chat. 35 00:01:42,686 --> 00:01:45,186 - You can't force people to use an app. 36 00:01:45,230 --> 00:01:48,440 What people get online for is viral videos, 37 00:01:48,483 --> 00:01:50,283 which we can make. 38 00:01:50,318 --> 00:01:51,818 - What kind of videos? 39 00:01:51,861 --> 00:01:54,661 Wait, like colonoscopy cams from very, very 40 00:01:54,698 --> 00:01:56,828 thin pescatarians? I'm in! 41 00:01:56,866 --> 00:02:00,156 - I once saw a tremendous zoetrope of a trotting pony. 42 00:02:00,203 --> 00:02:01,453 Like that? - Ooh, 43 00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:03,866 can that be part of a shared cinematic universe? 44 00:02:03,915 --> 00:02:05,955 - No, man, you guys are both so weird. 45 00:02:06,001 --> 00:02:08,921 Like, an unboxing video, where you open a box 46 00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:11,342 then take out the thing that was in the box. 47 00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:13,511 They're huge, trust me! 48 00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:15,090 - I don't know if you're serious. 49 00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,425 Are--are you? You... 50 00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:18,720 You're serious? 51 00:02:18,763 --> 00:02:20,523 Then I love it! [chuckling] 52 00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:22,307 - Well, I do not trust you. 53 00:02:22,350 --> 00:02:26,190 My role as Devil's Advocate requires I maintain my dignity, 54 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:27,729 so I want no part of this. 55 00:02:27,772 --> 00:02:30,862 - We have to trust each other or we have nothing. 56 00:02:30,900 --> 00:02:32,780 You'll see! Up on the trust table. 57 00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:34,899 All right, now, close your eyes... 58 00:02:34,946 --> 00:02:36,356 and fall. 59 00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:37,616 Trust us to catch you. 60 00:02:37,657 --> 00:02:40,037 - [sighs] Very well. 61 00:02:40,076 --> 00:02:41,446 Ah! 62 00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:44,624 I landed on my huge Victorian-era keys. 63 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:46,044 Ow. - Hard fail! 64 00:02:46,082 --> 00:02:48,542 Okay, I order you to trust us. 65 00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:52,955 - At least I still have my dignity. 66 00:02:53,965 --> 00:02:56,175 - Such a beautiful day. 67 00:02:56,217 --> 00:02:57,927 - [gurgling] 68 00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:59,759 [phone beeping] 69 00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:04,484 - Welcome to Hell's first viral video! 70 00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:07,097 I'm Devil, and holding the camera 71 00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:08,435 is head demon Gloria! 72 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:09,940 - Hi, mom. 73 00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:12,151 Actually, I was born from fire and dust, so... 74 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:13,692 hi, fire and dust? 75 00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:16,275 - Let's put a pin in Gloria's existential crisis 76 00:03:16,321 --> 00:03:18,161 and see what we're unboxing today. 77 00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:21,078 This is the physical embodiment of Teppeneitz, 78 00:03:21,117 --> 00:03:23,497 the German concept of thinking of the perfect comeback 79 00:03:23,536 --> 00:03:25,746 long after the chance to use it has passed. 80 00:03:25,789 --> 00:03:27,249 Neat, huh? [chuckling] 81 00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:29,250 Now, we unbox. 82 00:03:29,292 --> 00:03:30,842 [whooshing] 83 00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:32,047 Is that it? 84 00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:34,917 Beans, is that all I'm supposed to do? 85 00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:38,514 - No, you kiss like a washing machine, Ashley Johnson. 86 00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:42,101 You do! It would've been perfect. 87 00:03:42,138 --> 00:03:43,848 - Uh, okay. 88 00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:45,560 Next up, we have a recent delivery. 89 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:46,770 The paperwork says it contains 90 00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:49,230 Harvey Weinstein's deformed penis. 91 00:03:49,270 --> 00:03:50,400 Now, we unbox. 92 00:03:50,438 --> 00:03:51,608 - Oh, God! No! 93 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:53,268 - Ah, get it away from me! 94 00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:54,976 - Ah! Did it move? 95 00:03:55,026 --> 00:03:56,276 - It smells like shame and sauerkraut! 96 00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:57,399 - I saw it move! 97 00:03:57,445 --> 00:03:58,405 - I feel the urge to ask it 98 00:03:58,446 --> 00:03:59,816 for a screen credit. 99 00:03:59,864 --> 00:04:01,704 - Don't. - Ah, it's got a gun! 100 00:04:04,285 --> 00:04:05,405 - That is atrocious. 101 00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:08,253 I will never use Chit Chat again. 102 00:04:08,289 --> 00:04:10,669 - [screaming] 103 00:04:13,336 --> 00:04:15,336 - This will work? - Oh, yes. 104 00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:16,800 Tons of lame videos get views 105 00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:18,430 just because there's a hot woman in them. 106 00:04:18,466 --> 00:04:19,676 - [clears throat] 107 00:04:19,718 --> 00:04:23,138 Today, I am showing you a hack of life. 108 00:04:23,179 --> 00:04:25,599 You can wrap small hand towel 109 00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:29,310 around a mug to keep it warm. 110 00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:31,522 Boobies, boobies, boobies. 111 00:04:31,563 --> 00:04:34,113 - Maybe something sexier? - You dare? 112 00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:39,149 I am Regina Axtraivix, Succubus of the First Host! 113 00:04:39,195 --> 00:04:42,195 You dare question my sexy? 114 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:45,080 I'll show you how we scream in the pit. 115 00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:49,038 The souls of humans shred to tatters in my claws! 116 00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:52,830 Crushed to dust betwixt my loins! 117 00:04:52,876 --> 00:04:55,336 How's that? Better? 118 00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:56,588 - Yes. Thanks. 119 00:04:56,629 --> 00:04:59,009 - Ah, you cry from sexy? 120 00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:01,379 That makes me puke. 121 00:05:03,678 --> 00:05:06,808 - There's better ways to keep mugs warm than that! 122 00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:09,678 [birds chirping] 123 00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:12,226 - Regina, c'mon! I'll teach ya, it's fun. 124 00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:15,230 [upbeat music] 125 00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:22,413 * * 126 00:05:24,699 --> 00:05:26,279 Now you, McKinley! 127 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,536 - Challenge accepted. 128 00:05:27,577 --> 00:05:29,327 Dancing is a noble skill 129 00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:32,371 I proudly mastered on the White House ballroom floor. 130 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:33,825 Excellence at everything. 131 00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:36,705 This is the move that made King Alfonso XIII 132 00:05:36,753 --> 00:05:40,263 surrender Guam. - [laughing] 133 00:05:40,298 --> 00:05:42,338 * * 134 00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:46,554 - Ugh, I slightly moved my thumb to press play on that? 135 00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:51,018 - I am told that cooking instructionals are popular. 136 00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:53,309 As a veteran of the American Civil War, 137 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:56,113 my brothers and I faced such hardship 138 00:05:56,147 --> 00:05:57,727 that we ate our horses. 139 00:05:57,774 --> 00:06:02,204 Our delicious, delicious horses. 140 00:06:02,237 --> 00:06:04,947 First, I will explain how to slaughter the beast. 141 00:06:04,989 --> 00:06:06,779 This should only be attempted by the most virile 142 00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:08,405 of men, such as myself. 143 00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:11,411 Youths have even called me a... 144 00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:13,584 bad motherfucker, you know. 145 00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:15,633 [snorts and whinnies] 146 00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:21,921 - Meow? [laughing] 147 00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:24,085 - That's hilarious. all: [laughing] 148 00:06:24,134 --> 00:06:27,434 - McKinley is Hell's first meme! 149 00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:28,510 - [laughing] - Chit Chat must reach 150 00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:29,925 full penetration! 151 00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:32,353 McKinley, we're gonna meme the shit out of you. 152 00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,652 - Oh, please, no. No penetration. 153 00:06:35,687 --> 00:06:38,817 - We shall respect your wishes. 154 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:41,900 [whinnies] - Ah! 155 00:06:41,943 --> 00:06:43,783 - [laughing] - Did you get that? 156 00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:45,450 He thought I was a horse! 157 00:06:45,488 --> 00:06:47,488 Oh! Classic McKinley. 158 00:06:47,532 --> 00:06:49,202 - Damnation. 159 00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:56,172 * * 160 00:06:56,207 --> 00:06:59,587 Ah! Oh. 161 00:06:59,627 --> 00:07:04,297 * * 162 00:07:04,341 --> 00:07:06,011 [coughs] 163 00:07:06,051 --> 00:07:12,721 * * 164 00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:16,980 [screeching] 165 00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:21,650 * * 166 00:07:21,691 --> 00:07:23,531 We are here to review the impact 167 00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:25,148 of Earth's renewed interest 168 00:07:25,195 --> 00:07:27,405 in "Dungeons & Dragons" will have 169 00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:29,367 on incoming traffic during-- 170 00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:31,907 - Sir, we never received those projections. 171 00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:35,331 - Impossible! I oversaw them myself. 172 00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:37,212 What have you done? 173 00:07:37,248 --> 00:07:43,838 * * 174 00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:46,420 - I love these morning chit chats, Teacher Lamia! 175 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:49,756 - They are improving your grades, hell-spawn. 176 00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:51,853 Charlotte, is your homework ready? 177 00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,348 - Common core math has fallen before me! 178 00:07:54,391 --> 00:07:56,691 - You seeing this, baby? Now that's Chit Chat! 179 00:07:56,726 --> 00:08:00,226 - Ah, I suffocate in the sin of pride, my love. 180 00:08:00,271 --> 00:08:03,191 Children, to school! 181 00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:05,493 - That's McKinley... on your backpacks? 182 00:08:05,527 --> 00:08:07,987 - Everyone loves his funny videos. 183 00:08:08,029 --> 00:08:11,449 - My friends carve his name in the flesh of their enemies. 184 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:13,991 - Whoa! A lot to unpack there. 185 00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:19,962 * * 186 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,130 McKinley! 187 00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:22,917 You'll never believe what my kids have-- 188 00:08:22,961 --> 00:08:24,131 Ah, hey! 189 00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:26,880 - [squeals] Are you a McKinley maniac too? 190 00:08:26,923 --> 00:08:28,723 - Excuse me, madam. 191 00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:34,058 * * 192 00:08:34,097 --> 00:08:36,137 Ugh, oh! 193 00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:37,642 [gasps] 194 00:08:37,684 --> 00:08:39,694 * * 195 00:08:39,728 --> 00:08:41,478 Beans, your viral videos have unleashed 196 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:42,611 some kind of a curse. 197 00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:43,767 - Hell wasn't ready 198 00:08:43,815 --> 00:08:45,725 for this much social media this fast! 199 00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:48,945 McKinley is Hell's first influencer. 200 00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:52,912 - Bad Motherfucker McKinley? I love him. 201 00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:55,329 He's on Chit Chat right now. 202 00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:57,198 both: Ah! - Ah! 203 00:08:57,245 --> 00:08:59,615 Ow. Since when is Hell so rude? 204 00:08:59,664 --> 00:09:02,964 [cheering] 205 00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:07,211 - So if the denizens of Hell must be sheep, 206 00:09:07,255 --> 00:09:10,715 then your shepherd of influence I shall be. 207 00:09:10,759 --> 00:09:13,759 - Yeah! McKinley rules! 208 00:09:13,803 --> 00:09:15,183 - Dude, it's so fun to have 209 00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:17,851 someone else define your identity. 210 00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:19,601 - Yeah, McKinley rules! 211 00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:21,732 [screams] 212 00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:22,900 - You gotta stop this! 213 00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:24,057 He's gonna influence everyone 214 00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:25,895 to shove sticks up their butts. 215 00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:29,860 And not in a-a fun way, but as a metaphor. 216 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:33,413 - Social media may be an unpredictable noisy mess, 217 00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:36,948 but any idiot's voice can rise to the top at any time! 218 00:09:36,993 --> 00:09:39,413 - Any idiot's voice, you say? 219 00:09:39,454 --> 00:09:41,254 - When I am working, I do not smile. 220 00:09:41,289 --> 00:09:43,169 Smiles are your face stealing energy 221 00:09:43,208 --> 00:09:44,828 from the productive part of your body. 222 00:09:44,876 --> 00:09:46,336 Your knees. 223 00:09:46,378 --> 00:09:48,798 - I can see that. - Knees. 224 00:09:48,838 --> 00:09:51,548 - My most productive spot. 225 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,221 - Punch yourself in the nuts! 226 00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:54,549 all: [laughing] - Who said that? 227 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:55,764 Identify yourself. 228 00:09:55,804 --> 00:09:57,264 all: [laughing] 229 00:09:57,305 --> 00:10:00,055 - What were you, the President of eyebrows? 230 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,890 all: [laughing] - Oh, right. 231 00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:03,515 I follow this guy 'cause he's a joke. 232 00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:05,311 I wanna see a horse kick you in the face. 233 00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:06,725 all: [laughing] - Cease this foolery! 234 00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:08,363 - Cease this! 235 00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:10,780 [baby cooing] - Who is responsible for this? 236 00:10:10,819 --> 00:10:12,529 There is no place for disrespect 237 00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:14,490 in a civilized society. 238 00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:16,661 [laughter] 239 00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:19,290 - What did--oh! Damn you. 240 00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:20,497 [laughter] 241 00:10:20,537 --> 00:10:21,997 Ugh. 242 00:10:22,038 --> 00:10:23,368 [cat meows] Hey, hey! 243 00:10:23,415 --> 00:10:24,785 [laughter] - Oh. 244 00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:26,843 * * 245 00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:29,126 Ugh! - Ha, ha, ha, ha! 246 00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:31,010 - Consarn you, Rantallions! 247 00:10:31,047 --> 00:10:32,757 - My attention is easily diverted. 248 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:35,389 - Remember how we were all into knees? 249 00:10:35,427 --> 00:10:38,467 - A pox on the lot of you! Smallpox, specifically! 250 00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:44,811 - [gurgling] 251 00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:50,477 - I blame you for this misbegotten circus! 252 00:10:50,525 --> 00:10:52,025 - You know, very few people 253 00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:54,148 actually ever become influencers. 254 00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:56,025 And when they do, they're respected 255 00:10:56,072 --> 00:10:58,782 more than, like, the President of the United States. 256 00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:00,615 You should be proud. 257 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,290 - [muttering] Well, of course. 258 00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:05,329 On Earth, I served as President, 259 00:11:05,373 --> 00:11:07,923 and in Hell, I have become so much more. 260 00:11:07,959 --> 00:11:09,919 Carry on, Beans. Carry on. 261 00:11:09,961 --> 00:11:12,921 - Good work today, Beans. I am proud of you! 262 00:11:12,964 --> 00:11:14,884 And I love that joke about influencers 263 00:11:14,924 --> 00:11:16,224 outdoing the President. 264 00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:17,679 - That was true. 265 00:11:17,719 --> 00:11:19,429 - Holy shit. 266 00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:27,562 [upbeat music] 267 00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:31,154 * * 268 00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:32,941 - Coma! 19231

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