All language subtitles for The Barbarian and the Troll s01e08 Mapmaker, Mapmaker.eng

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:12,413 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:12,482 --> 00:00:15,103 - Oh, I'm so excited to continue questing. 3 00:00:15,172 --> 00:00:18,241 It's gonna be hard to top being almost eaten by a dragon. 4 00:00:18,310 --> 00:00:19,724 I wonder what we're gonna do. 5 00:00:19,793 --> 00:00:22,172 Hang glide through the jungles of Ganthor, 6 00:00:22,241 --> 00:00:24,310 rescue a fair maiden from the warlock's spell 7 00:00:24,379 --> 00:00:26,862 or storm the castle of Gilgamesh the Immortal? 8 00:00:26,931 --> 00:00:28,758 - Our next adventure will be the most noble 9 00:00:28,827 --> 00:00:31,103 of all our quests. [blade grinding] 10 00:00:31,172 --> 00:00:34,275 [epic music] 11 00:00:34,344 --> 00:00:37,103 We're hosting... 12 00:00:37,172 --> 00:00:38,517 a dinner party. 13 00:00:38,586 --> 00:00:40,241 [all gasping] - Ohh. 14 00:00:40,310 --> 00:00:42,551 - Well, I know how you feel about small talk, 15 00:00:42,620 --> 00:00:45,034 so that could be terrifying. 16 00:00:45,103 --> 00:00:47,137 - ♪ A troll burned his bridge ♪ 17 00:00:47,206 --> 00:00:49,448 ♪ A warrior lost her crown ♪ 18 00:00:49,517 --> 00:00:51,931 ♪ I'm not being poetic ♪ 19 00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:54,655 ♪ That's literally what went down ♪ 20 00:00:54,724 --> 00:00:56,206 ♪ Together their journey has begun ♪ 21 00:00:56,275 --> 00:00:58,655 ♪ Combining might and melody ♪ 22 00:00:58,724 --> 00:01:00,724 ♪ To quest and smite a demon ♪ 23 00:01:00,793 --> 00:01:03,758 ♪ And find their true family ♪ 24 00:01:03,827 --> 00:01:06,000 ♪ Yeah ♪ 25 00:01:06,068 --> 00:01:08,241 ♪ "The Barbarian and the Troll" ♪ 26 00:01:08,310 --> 00:01:10,000 ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ 27 00:01:10,068 --> 00:01:13,068 ♪ "The Barbarian and the Troll" ♪ 28 00:01:13,137 --> 00:01:15,620 ♪ ♪ 29 00:01:15,689 --> 00:01:17,413 - Does it have to be a dinner party? 30 00:01:17,482 --> 00:01:18,689 - Oh, we can have a game night. 31 00:01:18,758 --> 00:01:19,931 - I mean, how about a murder mystery? 32 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,241 - Does anyone like "Settlers of the Realm"? 33 00:01:21,310 --> 00:01:22,931 - Oh! A toga party. 34 00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:24,172 - "Bards Against Humanity"? 35 00:01:24,241 --> 00:01:26,310 - No. It's the next step in my plan. 36 00:01:26,379 --> 00:01:28,724 A dinner party should be our easiest quest yet. 37 00:01:28,793 --> 00:01:31,724 - Easier than the great quest to find my reading glasses? 38 00:01:31,793 --> 00:01:34,586 - That wasn't a quest, and you were wearing them. 39 00:01:34,655 --> 00:01:37,103 - Well, I'll have you know I can't find them again. 40 00:01:37,172 --> 00:01:38,517 - They're on your forehead. 41 00:01:40,620 --> 00:01:42,241 - Oh. Mystery solved. 42 00:01:42,310 --> 00:01:44,413 - [sighs] - So how's this gonna work? 43 00:01:44,482 --> 00:01:45,724 - I'm glad you asked. 44 00:01:45,793 --> 00:01:48,137 The greatest map maker in all of Gothmoria, 45 00:01:48,206 --> 00:01:50,310 Christoph the Cartographer Unicorn, 46 00:01:50,379 --> 00:01:52,448 has agreed to come here and draw us a map 47 00:01:52,517 --> 00:01:54,482 to the demon Alvin's lair. 48 00:01:54,551 --> 00:02:00,172 With this map, I can finally rescue my brother Kendar. 49 00:02:00,241 --> 00:02:01,586 - Wouldn't it be easier 50 00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:04,034 to just buy one at Maps, Crafts and Yonder? 51 00:02:04,103 --> 00:02:07,655 - No. Because Christoph is the only living creature 52 00:02:07,724 --> 00:02:10,448 who has the magic to find Alvin's lair. 53 00:02:10,517 --> 00:02:13,206 - Oh, cool. - Horus, help me out 54 00:02:13,275 --> 00:02:15,482 with this little questing back story. 55 00:02:16,758 --> 00:02:18,689 - Behold! 56 00:02:18,758 --> 00:02:22,068 Christoph only emerges from the enchanted forest 57 00:02:22,137 --> 00:02:25,758 every hundredth blue moon to offer his services. 58 00:02:25,827 --> 00:02:28,172 His maps are detailed and exquisite, 59 00:02:28,241 --> 00:02:31,241 and always give the most precise directions. 60 00:02:31,310 --> 00:02:34,724 It even includes where you find indoor outhouses. 61 00:02:34,793 --> 00:02:36,068 - But he's very particular 62 00:02:36,137 --> 00:02:38,103 about who he bestows his maps upon. 63 00:02:38,172 --> 00:02:41,103 He requires a lavish dinner be thrown in his honor, 64 00:02:41,172 --> 00:02:44,034 and the host bend to his every whim. 65 00:02:44,103 --> 00:02:46,517 We'll only have one chance to impress him. 66 00:02:46,586 --> 00:02:48,689 And if we don't, Christoph will return 67 00:02:48,758 --> 00:02:49,689 to the enchanted forest 68 00:02:49,758 --> 00:02:53,241 for another hundred blue moons. 69 00:02:53,310 --> 00:02:54,620 And if he does, 70 00:02:54,689 --> 00:02:56,827 we may never find where my brother is hidden. 71 00:02:56,896 --> 00:03:02,655 - Oh, I get it. A cartographer is someone who makes maps. 72 00:03:02,724 --> 00:03:07,034 - The point is, we have no second chances. 73 00:03:07,103 --> 00:03:09,793 We all have to work together to wow Christoph. 74 00:03:09,862 --> 00:03:11,931 Kyle, you're in charge of the food. 75 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:13,482 - How about I make him a nice steak? 76 00:03:13,551 --> 00:03:17,137 - Fine. Stacey, you'll give him a relaxing spa treatment. 77 00:03:17,206 --> 00:03:18,689 You know, leeches or bloodletting, 78 00:03:18,758 --> 00:03:20,310 whatever fancy people do. 79 00:03:20,379 --> 00:03:23,310 - Okay, but no feet. I hate feet. 80 00:03:23,379 --> 00:03:26,689 - And Evan, I've hired Christoph's favorite comedian, 81 00:03:26,758 --> 00:03:28,241 Squid Caesar, as entertainment. 82 00:03:28,310 --> 00:03:30,896 So I need you to make sure Mr. Caesar is taken care of. 83 00:03:30,965 --> 00:03:32,482 - Squid Caesar? 84 00:03:32,551 --> 00:03:35,965 He's the biggest insult celebrity comic around. 85 00:03:36,034 --> 00:03:38,758 How did you get Squid Caesar to agree to come here? 86 00:03:38,827 --> 00:03:40,517 - I threatened his manager that I'd throw him off 87 00:03:40,586 --> 00:03:41,896 the Cliffs of Chaos. - Hmm. 88 00:03:41,965 --> 00:03:43,862 - And what's my role in this quest? 89 00:03:43,931 --> 00:03:46,482 - You have the most important job of all. 90 00:03:46,551 --> 00:03:48,724 - Motherhood. Got it. - No. 91 00:03:48,793 --> 00:03:51,034 I need you to watch the door. 92 00:03:51,103 --> 00:03:52,448 Let me know when they get here, 93 00:03:52,517 --> 00:03:54,793 and make sure our entertainer and guest of honor 94 00:03:54,862 --> 00:03:57,275 get a lot of fanfare and hubbub. 95 00:03:57,344 --> 00:03:59,137 - I will not leave that door. 96 00:03:59,206 --> 00:04:02,724 People won't know where that door ends and I begin. 97 00:04:02,793 --> 00:04:05,551 Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go tinkle. 98 00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:08,172 [sighs] Huh! 99 00:04:08,241 --> 00:04:11,034 - Whoa! - Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Caesar. 100 00:04:11,103 --> 00:04:13,241 - Oh, you're a sharp one. I guess you made your point. 101 00:04:13,310 --> 00:04:14,482 Blammo! 102 00:04:14,551 --> 00:04:17,517 - Squid Caesar? Wow, wow, wow! 103 00:04:17,586 --> 00:04:19,758 - Calm down, Evan. Don't scare him away. 104 00:04:19,827 --> 00:04:22,379 - You're "the" Squid Caesar. 105 00:04:22,448 --> 00:04:23,862 I--I would love to shake your hand, 106 00:04:23,931 --> 00:04:25,241 but I don't know which one to shake. 107 00:04:25,310 --> 00:04:26,896 - Whoa, you're a short one. 108 00:04:26,965 --> 00:04:30,137 You're so short, you could pose for trophies. Blammo! 109 00:04:30,206 --> 00:04:32,482 - [laughs] 110 00:04:32,551 --> 00:04:34,620 - Seriously, kid. You're so short, you don't know 111 00:04:34,689 --> 00:04:37,310 if you have a headache or a foot ache. Blammo! 112 00:04:37,379 --> 00:04:39,586 - [laughing] 113 00:04:39,655 --> 00:04:41,137 Oh, oh, insult me again. 114 00:04:41,206 --> 00:04:43,137 Go ahead, really give it to me this time. 115 00:04:43,206 --> 00:04:46,172 - Okay, we don't want to wear Mr. Caesar out. 116 00:04:46,241 --> 00:04:47,620 Stacey! - Uhh! 117 00:04:47,689 --> 00:04:49,689 - 'Sup? - Please show Mr. Caesar 118 00:04:49,758 --> 00:04:53,758 to our VIP area. - Right this way. 119 00:04:53,827 --> 00:04:56,137 - Ooh, look at that walk. You're a little pigeon-toed 120 00:04:56,206 --> 00:04:58,413 for an owl, aren't you? Blammo! 121 00:04:58,482 --> 00:05:02,206 - [laughs] Oh, boy. 122 00:05:02,275 --> 00:05:04,517 Every blammo's just perfectly timed. 123 00:05:04,586 --> 00:05:05,862 It's so good. 124 00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:07,862 I'm sorry, just a little excited. 125 00:05:07,931 --> 00:05:11,620 - You're a little everything. Blammo! 126 00:05:11,689 --> 00:05:13,862 Get it? 'Cause you're little. 127 00:05:15,034 --> 00:05:16,896 - Mm, you're no Squid Caesar. 128 00:05:18,689 --> 00:05:21,275 - All right. Welcome to our VIP area. 129 00:05:21,344 --> 00:05:22,517 Pop a squat. 130 00:05:22,586 --> 00:05:24,172 - Oh, don't mind if I do. I'm game. 131 00:05:24,241 --> 00:05:26,620 Oh, wait. You're game. Ho, ho, ho! 132 00:05:26,689 --> 00:05:27,724 You know, I've never been escorted 133 00:05:27,793 --> 00:05:29,551 by a talking pillow before. 134 00:05:29,620 --> 00:05:31,896 Blammo![laughs] 135 00:05:31,965 --> 00:05:34,896 - Ha. - Ooh, yeah tough crowd. 136 00:05:34,965 --> 00:05:35,965 Tough crowd. 137 00:05:36,034 --> 00:05:37,689 - Can I get you something to drink? 138 00:05:37,758 --> 00:05:39,758 - Uh, yes. Literally anything. 139 00:05:39,827 --> 00:05:41,931 I'm a squid. I need hydration. 140 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:44,379 - Anything liquid, coming right up. 141 00:05:44,448 --> 00:05:46,655 - Mm-hmm. 142 00:05:46,724 --> 00:05:49,827 VIP room? What's that stand for? 143 00:05:49,896 --> 00:05:52,000 Very Inadequate Paycheck? 144 00:05:52,068 --> 00:05:55,620 - Mm, mm, mm. [sniffing] - Kyle, this is important. 145 00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:56,965 What are you cooking? 146 00:05:57,034 --> 00:05:59,689 - I'm gonna start with my fresh made crab cakes. 147 00:05:59,758 --> 00:06:01,689 both: Great. - Then I'm gonna wow him 148 00:06:01,758 --> 00:06:03,551 with my seasoned Pegasus steak. 149 00:06:03,620 --> 00:06:05,103 both: Cool. 150 00:06:05,172 --> 00:06:07,931 - And for dessert, I have a delicious strawberry pudding. 151 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:09,689 both: Yum! - Mwah! 152 00:06:09,758 --> 00:06:11,137 But you gotta stir it constantly, 153 00:06:11,206 --> 00:06:12,655 or it ends up everywhere. 154 00:06:12,724 --> 00:06:14,068 Hey, Stacey, do you mind stirring 155 00:06:14,137 --> 00:06:15,689 while I get started on the steak? 156 00:06:15,758 --> 00:06:17,689 - Go team. - Go team. 157 00:06:17,758 --> 00:06:19,551 And remember, you gotta keep stirring 158 00:06:19,620 --> 00:06:20,724 or it's gonna get ruined. 159 00:06:20,793 --> 00:06:21,931 - Yeah, I got it. 160 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:23,827 Stirring the pot is kinda my thing. 161 00:06:23,896 --> 00:06:26,034 - How's Squid Caesar? - Oh, right. 162 00:06:26,103 --> 00:06:28,413 He wanted something to drink, but now I'm on pudding duty. 163 00:06:28,482 --> 00:06:31,034 - [sighs] Mutter, mutter, disaster, mutter, mutter. 164 00:06:31,103 --> 00:06:32,827 - I can hear you muttering, you know. 165 00:06:32,896 --> 00:06:34,206 - You were supposed to! 166 00:06:34,275 --> 00:06:35,965 Hi! Hi, there. 167 00:06:36,034 --> 00:06:39,758 A glass of water for Mr. Caesar? [laughs] 168 00:06:39,827 --> 00:06:43,068 Aren't you gonna insult me, you know? 169 00:06:43,137 --> 00:06:45,310 The only thing more uptight than that barbarian 170 00:06:45,379 --> 00:06:47,517 is her headband! 171 00:06:47,586 --> 00:06:50,620 Mr. Caesar? Squid? 172 00:06:50,689 --> 00:06:52,344 [dramatic music] 173 00:06:52,413 --> 00:06:54,965 [gasps] No. 174 00:06:55,034 --> 00:06:57,103 No-no-no-no. 175 00:06:57,172 --> 00:06:58,655 Please be sleeping. Please be sleeping. 176 00:06:58,724 --> 00:07:02,103 Please just be sleeping. Come on, wake up. Wh-wh-wh-- 177 00:07:02,172 --> 00:07:04,758 - Whoa! Grab some lemon and marinara. 178 00:07:04,827 --> 00:07:06,758 That is one deceased squid. 179 00:07:06,827 --> 00:07:09,172 - I can fix this. It's just a little hiccup. 180 00:07:09,241 --> 00:07:11,896 I just need a little bit more time. 181 00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:15,241 - Hey, unicorn's here. [chuckles] 182 00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:17,206 - Blammo. - Ugh. 183 00:07:21,413 --> 00:07:22,413 - Did you kill him? 184 00:07:22,482 --> 00:07:24,689 - With kindness, maybe. [laughs] 185 00:07:24,758 --> 00:07:26,068 Okay, we both know that's not true. 186 00:07:26,137 --> 00:07:27,689 I just brought him back here like you asked! 187 00:07:27,758 --> 00:07:29,896 - Whoa! That squid's not alive. 188 00:07:29,965 --> 00:07:32,448 - We know. Stacey killed him. - No, he was alive 189 00:07:32,517 --> 00:07:33,655 when I left him. 190 00:07:33,724 --> 00:07:35,241 - Well maybe it's because he's sitting 191 00:07:35,310 --> 00:07:37,758 on the giant block of salt that I use to season my steaks. 192 00:07:37,827 --> 00:07:39,344 - Told you it wasn't my fault. 193 00:07:39,413 --> 00:07:42,103 - The salt sucked all the moisture out of his body. 194 00:07:42,172 --> 00:07:45,103 - Like a slug. - This is terrible. 195 00:07:45,172 --> 00:07:46,896 - You're telling me. Now my steaks are gonna 196 00:07:46,965 --> 00:07:48,620 taste more surf than turf. 197 00:07:48,689 --> 00:07:50,931 - Focus, Kyle. Focus. 198 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:54,517 - I'll just remarket everything as, uh, sea cow. 199 00:07:54,586 --> 00:07:55,724 - [sighs] 200 00:07:55,793 --> 00:07:57,068 - We're doomed. 201 00:07:57,137 --> 00:08:00,068 [epic music] 202 00:08:00,137 --> 00:08:01,172 ♪ ♪ 203 00:08:01,241 --> 00:08:02,586 - [snorts] 204 00:08:02,655 --> 00:08:04,965 - Christoph! What an honor it is 205 00:08:05,034 --> 00:08:07,034 to have you in our humble tavern. 206 00:08:07,103 --> 00:08:09,137 Thank you for gracing us with your presence. 207 00:08:09,206 --> 00:08:12,068 - Yes, what a rustic and seedy décor. 208 00:08:12,137 --> 00:08:15,068 I can't believe Squid Caesar's actually playing this joint. 209 00:08:15,137 --> 00:08:17,896 - I know. Neither can I. Who comes here? Not me. 210 00:08:17,965 --> 00:08:19,931 - [snorts] I've heard his act is to die for. 211 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,310 You know, I haven't actually seen him live before. 212 00:08:22,379 --> 00:08:23,793 - You should have been here a few minutes ago. 213 00:08:23,862 --> 00:08:25,137 - I'm sorry, what? 214 00:08:25,206 --> 00:08:27,827 - Nothing. Right this way. - [snorts] 215 00:08:27,896 --> 00:08:30,137 - So, you don't actually know 216 00:08:30,206 --> 00:08:32,172 what Squid Caesar looks like, then. 217 00:08:32,241 --> 00:08:35,103 - Mm. I'm assuming he looks like a squid. 218 00:08:35,172 --> 00:08:38,137 - [sighs] Yeah. Of course he does. 219 00:08:38,206 --> 00:08:39,241 - Christoph is hot. 220 00:08:39,310 --> 00:08:41,586 Christoph doesn't like being hot. 221 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:44,034 - Stacey! 222 00:08:44,103 --> 00:08:45,655 - Yeah. - Please make sure Christoph 223 00:08:45,724 --> 00:08:47,103 is adequately chilled. 224 00:08:47,172 --> 00:08:49,931 [laughs] And try not to kill him. 225 00:08:51,586 --> 00:08:53,172 - [flapping] 226 00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:54,275 - I'm still hot. 227 00:08:54,344 --> 00:08:55,655 - [flapping harder] 228 00:08:55,724 --> 00:08:58,551 - I'm hot. - [flapping harder] 229 00:08:58,620 --> 00:08:59,724 - Now I'm too cold. 230 00:08:59,793 --> 00:09:01,482 - [humming] 231 00:09:01,551 --> 00:09:03,689 - [gasps] Horace. - Huh? 232 00:09:03,758 --> 00:09:05,172 - You were supposed to be watching the door. 233 00:09:05,241 --> 00:09:06,965 Christoph was out there all alone. 234 00:09:07,034 --> 00:09:09,241 - Oh, I was told to stir the pudding. 235 00:09:09,310 --> 00:09:12,000 Oh, it makes this really neat squishy sound when you do it. 236 00:09:12,068 --> 00:09:13,068 Listen. 237 00:09:13,137 --> 00:09:16,206 [silence] 238 00:09:16,275 --> 00:09:18,206 Well, of course now it won't do it. 239 00:09:18,275 --> 00:09:19,620 - Somebody else can stir the pudding. 240 00:09:19,689 --> 00:09:21,931 Where's Evan? - Ugh. 241 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:24,724 - Evan! - Oh, shh. 242 00:09:24,793 --> 00:09:26,413 Uh, we're meditating. [flies buzzing] 243 00:09:26,482 --> 00:09:29,344 Squid's clearing his head before a big show. 244 00:09:29,413 --> 00:09:30,586 You wouldn't understand 245 00:09:30,655 --> 00:09:33,068 'cause you're not a performer like we are. 246 00:09:33,137 --> 00:09:36,482 - Uh, Evan? You should know-- 247 00:09:36,551 --> 00:09:38,724 - Shh. Oh, uh, yeah. 248 00:09:38,793 --> 00:09:40,551 We should hold it down 249 00:09:40,620 --> 00:09:43,827 'cause Squid's still meditating. 250 00:09:43,896 --> 00:09:45,310 - Right. - Yeah. 251 00:09:45,379 --> 00:09:47,103 - Well-- - Shh. 252 00:09:47,172 --> 00:09:50,172 - Wash your hands. - [gulps] 253 00:09:50,241 --> 00:09:51,241 [sniffs] 254 00:09:51,310 --> 00:09:52,689 - Oh, good, you're here. 255 00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:54,517 Could you stir this pudding for a while? 256 00:09:54,586 --> 00:09:55,724 My arm is killing me. 257 00:09:55,793 --> 00:09:57,655 - Fine. - Ugh. 258 00:09:57,724 --> 00:09:59,275 - Go make sure Christoph doesn't leave. 259 00:09:59,344 --> 00:10:00,689 - Oh, right. But first, 260 00:10:00,758 --> 00:10:03,724 I have to go tinkle again. - Uhh. 261 00:10:03,793 --> 00:10:05,034 - [imitating] Christoph is hungry. 262 00:10:05,103 --> 00:10:06,862 Where is Christoph's food? 263 00:10:06,931 --> 00:10:08,965 - Please tell me dinner's almost ready. 264 00:10:09,034 --> 00:10:10,586 - I'm on it. Just havin' a little trouble 265 00:10:10,655 --> 00:10:11,931 with the crab cakes. 266 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:14,758 Smash! Bang! Crush! - Ugh, just bite them 267 00:10:14,827 --> 00:10:16,344 like I do. - Huh? 268 00:10:16,413 --> 00:10:20,034 Huh, uh! [biting] 269 00:10:20,103 --> 00:10:22,793 Ha. [panting] - Problem solved. 270 00:10:22,862 --> 00:10:24,724 - And yet, so many more problems to go. 271 00:10:24,793 --> 00:10:27,586 - How 'bout I skip to the main course? 272 00:10:28,206 --> 00:10:31,103 Here you go, sir. Beautiful Pegasus steak 273 00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:33,344 wrapped in the finest bacon of Gothmoria, 274 00:10:33,413 --> 00:10:36,517 draped in a beautiful beef and peppercorn sauce. 275 00:10:36,586 --> 00:10:38,034 My mother's homemade recipe. 276 00:10:38,103 --> 00:10:41,103 - I'm a vegetarian. - Excellent, sir. 277 00:10:41,172 --> 00:10:43,551 I'll be back with something green in a moment. 278 00:10:43,620 --> 00:10:46,275 [laughing] He's a vegetarian. 279 00:10:48,965 --> 00:10:50,758 The horse is a vegetarian. 280 00:10:50,827 --> 00:10:53,241 - Ah. The pudding doesn't have meat in it, does it? 281 00:10:53,310 --> 00:10:55,241 - Well, I can strain it out before I serve it. 282 00:10:55,310 --> 00:10:57,241 He'll never know. - Wasn't Christoph 283 00:10:57,310 --> 00:11:00,517 supposed to get a pedicure and a hoof polish? 284 00:11:00,586 --> 00:11:03,793 - You promised him a pedicure? 285 00:11:03,862 --> 00:11:06,206 - Yes. Yes, I did. 286 00:11:06,275 --> 00:11:09,689 Now you get out there, and you polish some hooves! 287 00:11:09,758 --> 00:11:12,034 - You owe me big time. 288 00:11:13,965 --> 00:11:18,344 - Hmm, hm, hm. 289 00:11:18,413 --> 00:11:22,206 - Hi, I'm Stacey. And I'll be your spa treatment specialist. 290 00:11:22,275 --> 00:11:24,000 Would you care for a pre-dinner pedicure? 291 00:11:24,068 --> 00:11:25,275 - Hm. - It's our specialty here 292 00:11:25,344 --> 00:11:28,655 at the Goiter, along with poorly hatched plans. 293 00:11:28,724 --> 00:11:29,862 - [snorts] - Huh. 294 00:11:29,931 --> 00:11:32,413 - Christoph would love one. 295 00:11:32,482 --> 00:11:35,379 [dramatic music] 296 00:11:35,448 --> 00:11:37,862 ♪ ♪ 297 00:11:37,931 --> 00:11:41,137 - Holy pellets. - [snorts] I gotta warn you, 298 00:11:41,206 --> 00:11:43,344 it's been a hundred blue moons since my last one. 299 00:11:43,413 --> 00:11:46,275 - [gagging] - They're a little muddy. 300 00:11:46,344 --> 00:11:48,655 - [gags] I can do this. 301 00:11:48,724 --> 00:11:50,448 - What are we gonna do? 302 00:11:50,517 --> 00:11:53,241 We have no food and no entertainment. 303 00:11:53,310 --> 00:11:54,793 - Hmm. 304 00:11:54,862 --> 00:11:59,241 I could razzle dazzle him with some magic! 305 00:11:59,310 --> 00:12:01,137 Levitate! 306 00:12:04,655 --> 00:12:07,689 [coughs] Ehh. 307 00:12:07,758 --> 00:12:09,724 [coughing] 308 00:12:09,793 --> 00:12:12,344 - That neither razzled or dazzled. 309 00:12:12,413 --> 00:12:14,620 - [blubbering] 310 00:12:14,689 --> 00:12:18,068 - That Squid Caesar is a genius. 311 00:12:18,137 --> 00:12:21,137 Salt of the earth. He didn't interrupt me once. 312 00:12:21,206 --> 00:12:23,896 You know, you all can learn a lot from that guy. 313 00:12:23,965 --> 00:12:25,862 - He's gone, Evan. 314 00:12:25,931 --> 00:12:27,068 - He's right over there, 315 00:12:27,137 --> 00:12:28,517 which is why I'm being a little quiet. 316 00:12:28,586 --> 00:12:31,000 - No. You have been talking to a squid 317 00:12:31,068 --> 00:12:33,758 who has left the mortal coil. 318 00:12:33,827 --> 00:12:36,344 He has sloughed off his body. 319 00:12:36,413 --> 00:12:40,655 He is liquid-less, soul-less, dead. 320 00:12:40,724 --> 00:12:44,000 - You guys left me back there... 321 00:12:51,448 --> 00:12:53,344 with a corpse? 322 00:12:53,413 --> 00:12:54,862 [chuckles nervously] 323 00:12:54,931 --> 00:12:57,275 Although it totally explains the smell. 324 00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:58,551 I thought I was gonna have to have 325 00:12:58,620 --> 00:13:00,172 a real awkward conversation with the guy 326 00:13:00,241 --> 00:13:03,551 about personal hygiene, so crisis averted. 327 00:13:03,620 --> 00:13:07,172 - Those things are nasty without a shoe. 328 00:13:07,241 --> 00:13:09,793 I think I have hoof-and-mouth disease. 329 00:13:09,862 --> 00:13:14,344 - Guys! We need that map if we are going to rescue my brother. 330 00:13:14,413 --> 00:13:17,551 all: Who was stolen by the demon Alvin. 331 00:13:17,620 --> 00:13:18,965 - Oh, I'm sorry. 332 00:13:19,034 --> 00:13:21,517 Do I talk about my missing brother too much? 333 00:13:21,586 --> 00:13:22,896 - Mm-mm? - Wait. 334 00:13:22,965 --> 00:13:25,655 If you're all here, who's watching Christoph? 335 00:13:25,724 --> 00:13:27,068 - [gasps] 336 00:13:27,137 --> 00:13:33,931 ♪ ♪ 337 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:36,931 - He's gone! 338 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:40,551 - All right, I am all set to man that door. 339 00:13:42,275 --> 00:13:43,965 What did I miss something? 340 00:13:48,310 --> 00:13:51,482 - Christoph, Christoph, wait. - Whatever it is I left behind, 341 00:13:51,551 --> 00:13:53,068 just keep it. [snorts] 342 00:13:53,137 --> 00:13:56,344 - Christoph, please don't go. 343 00:13:56,413 --> 00:13:58,103 You're my only hope. 344 00:13:58,172 --> 00:14:00,103 I'm on the quest of my life. 345 00:14:00,172 --> 00:14:02,896 I have to save my brother from the demon Alvin. 346 00:14:02,965 --> 00:14:05,310 He's been gone so long. 347 00:14:05,379 --> 00:14:07,689 You know, the only thing I have left of him 348 00:14:07,758 --> 00:14:10,655 is a toy shovel he dropped. 349 00:14:10,724 --> 00:14:13,275 - I don't mean to sound judgy, but that's a pretty weird thing 350 00:14:13,344 --> 00:14:16,448 to keep on your person at all times. [snorts] 351 00:14:16,517 --> 00:14:18,896 - It just makes me feel closer to him, 352 00:14:18,965 --> 00:14:24,000 even though he's a world away, being held against his will. 353 00:14:26,551 --> 00:14:28,206 - Hm. 354 00:14:28,275 --> 00:14:30,689 Will Squid Caesar still be performing 355 00:14:30,758 --> 00:14:32,689 his unique brand of insult comedy? 356 00:14:32,758 --> 00:14:36,689 - Yes, absolutely. He'll just be extra salty. 357 00:14:36,758 --> 00:14:37,862 - What are we waiting for? 358 00:14:37,931 --> 00:14:39,758 - A miracle? - I'm sorry? 359 00:14:39,827 --> 00:14:40,862 - Let's get back to the tavern! 360 00:14:40,931 --> 00:14:42,482 - Yes! 361 00:14:42,551 --> 00:14:46,068 - Okay, just sit right down there and get comfy. 362 00:14:46,137 --> 00:14:48,862 - Christoph is hungry. - Stacey! 363 00:14:51,655 --> 00:14:56,206 - You want these one at a time, or shall I strap on a feed bag? 364 00:14:56,275 --> 00:14:59,344 - You have a feed bag?[snorts] 365 00:14:59,413 --> 00:15:01,137 - [grunting] Ahh. 366 00:15:01,206 --> 00:15:02,517 Oh, this is a good batch. 367 00:15:02,586 --> 00:15:05,206 It's fighting back. That's how I know it's almost done. 368 00:15:05,275 --> 00:15:07,965 - Oh, boy. These things looked 369 00:15:08,034 --> 00:15:10,965 a lot floatier when they were in water. 370 00:15:11,034 --> 00:15:13,344 - All right. Change of plans. 371 00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:14,827 Christoph wants the squid or nothing, 372 00:15:14,896 --> 00:15:16,965 so we're just gonna have to tie him up and force the map 373 00:15:17,034 --> 00:15:18,172 out of him by way of violence. 374 00:15:18,241 --> 00:15:19,758 - Violence, okay. - Great. 375 00:15:19,827 --> 00:15:22,310 - Or, or, or we prop up Squid somehow 376 00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:23,620 and pretend he's still alive 377 00:15:23,689 --> 00:15:25,965 while I do all the jokes and impersonate him. 378 00:15:26,034 --> 00:15:27,586 And then Christoph still gets his show. 379 00:15:27,655 --> 00:15:29,275 - So nobody likes my violence plan? 380 00:15:29,344 --> 00:15:31,034 - Mm-mm. - Do what now? 381 00:15:31,103 --> 00:15:32,482 - Fine. Let's do your thing. 382 00:15:32,551 --> 00:15:35,310 - Ah, finally. The role I was born to play. 383 00:15:35,379 --> 00:15:38,172 Surreptitiously impersonating a deceased insult comic squid. 384 00:15:38,241 --> 00:15:41,310 - This is the most important performance of your life. 385 00:15:41,379 --> 00:15:42,827 Good luck. 386 00:15:42,896 --> 00:15:44,206 - [sighs] 387 00:15:44,275 --> 00:15:46,344 Welcome to the Queen's Goiter 388 00:15:46,413 --> 00:15:51,137 for a night of live-ish entertainment. 389 00:15:51,206 --> 00:15:55,310 So enjoy whatever the heck this is. 390 00:15:55,379 --> 00:15:56,758 Here he is, okay. - Whoo-hoo! Yeah! 391 00:15:56,827 --> 00:15:58,655 - Look at him, so lively. 392 00:15:58,724 --> 00:16:00,586 - Hey, thanks everybody. 393 00:16:00,655 --> 00:16:02,517 How 'bout that Kyle, huh? 394 00:16:02,586 --> 00:16:05,137 You know before he ran a tavern, 395 00:16:05,206 --> 00:16:06,862 he used to be a teacher. 396 00:16:06,931 --> 00:16:11,413 But he got fired because he only had one good pupil. 397 00:16:11,482 --> 00:16:12,758 Blammo! 398 00:16:12,827 --> 00:16:14,793 - Low blow. 399 00:16:14,862 --> 00:16:16,655 - Oh, uh, hm-- 400 00:16:16,724 --> 00:16:18,517 But that was great for us 401 00:16:18,586 --> 00:16:22,275 because turns out he makes a terrific two-bean salad. 402 00:16:22,344 --> 00:16:23,724 Blammo! 403 00:16:23,793 --> 00:16:25,103 - Ha, ha. 404 00:16:26,689 --> 00:16:29,206 - Squid Caesar's really lost his touch. 405 00:16:29,275 --> 00:16:32,172 That last one was more like a compliment. [snorts] 406 00:16:32,241 --> 00:16:34,758 - Uh, uh--[clears throat] 407 00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:37,448 Hey, have you guys met Brendar? 408 00:16:37,517 --> 00:16:41,034 Uh, that lady's got a face that can make an onion cry. 409 00:16:41,103 --> 00:16:42,931 Blammo! [laughter] 410 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:46,413 - [laughs] [grumbles] 411 00:16:48,206 --> 00:16:50,965 - Oh, uh, hey, look at this guy here, huh? 412 00:16:51,034 --> 00:16:54,206 Ew, look at that face. There's not a thing I'd change. 413 00:16:54,275 --> 00:16:55,655 - No, stop. - No. 414 00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:57,862 - Except that the direction I was walking in. 415 00:16:57,931 --> 00:17:01,689 Ha, whoo! Bl-- I mean, seriously, 416 00:17:01,758 --> 00:17:04,482 his face is so long, it needs an intermission. 417 00:17:06,827 --> 00:17:10,103 - It's true. I'm really not much of a looker. [laughs] 418 00:17:10,172 --> 00:17:12,344 - [sighs] 419 00:17:12,413 --> 00:17:15,241 - Oh, hey, look at this owl over here. 420 00:17:15,310 --> 00:17:18,206 [dramatic music] 421 00:17:18,275 --> 00:17:25,379 ♪ ♪ 422 00:17:28,551 --> 00:17:30,241 - [roars] 423 00:17:30,310 --> 00:17:33,862 - Oh, hey, uh, let's get back to Kyle, huh? 424 00:17:33,931 --> 00:17:37,655 Kyle is such a terrible cook, the flies went on strike. 425 00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:39,137 [laughter] 426 00:17:39,206 --> 00:17:41,137 - Blammo! [snaps] 427 00:17:41,206 --> 00:17:42,827 - Oh, fiddlesticks. 428 00:17:42,896 --> 00:17:44,655 [all gasping] 429 00:17:44,724 --> 00:17:46,137 - Ohh. - Whoa! 430 00:17:46,206 --> 00:17:49,103 - Hmm. - Ah! We're losing him! 431 00:17:49,172 --> 00:17:51,551 - Stop pulling things. You're making it worse. 432 00:17:51,620 --> 00:17:54,310 [chuckles] Hey, you've been a beautiful audience. 433 00:17:54,379 --> 00:17:56,068 So why don't you give yourselves a hand. 434 00:17:56,137 --> 00:17:57,965 And then when you're done, give me one. 435 00:17:58,034 --> 00:18:01,241 [laughs] Uh-- Curtains, curtains! 436 00:18:01,310 --> 00:18:02,724 [struggling efforts] 437 00:18:02,793 --> 00:18:04,758 - Oh, this is a disaster. 438 00:18:04,827 --> 00:18:07,172 All right, serve the pudding before he leaves again. 439 00:18:07,241 --> 00:18:09,655 - Right, the pudding. 440 00:18:09,724 --> 00:18:12,310 Who's been stirring the pudding? 441 00:18:12,379 --> 00:18:13,931 - Why's that important? 442 00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:16,827 - I said to keep stirring it... 443 00:18:16,896 --> 00:18:19,172 or the pudding gets everywhere! 444 00:18:19,241 --> 00:18:22,379 - [roaring] [all exclaiming] 445 00:18:22,448 --> 00:18:25,517 - Pudding on the loose! - Mama! Dada! 446 00:18:25,586 --> 00:18:27,103 [all exclaiming] 447 00:18:27,172 --> 00:18:28,655 - Ooh, he looks hungry. 448 00:18:28,724 --> 00:18:30,034 - Bad live cultures. 449 00:18:30,103 --> 00:18:32,137 - [roaring] - Ahh! 450 00:18:32,206 --> 00:18:35,379 - Ahh! What the-- - My tavern! Oh, no! 451 00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:38,241 [roars] - Go the other way! 452 00:18:38,310 --> 00:18:39,793 [thud] - Ohh! Ohh! 453 00:18:39,862 --> 00:18:41,137 [wailing] - Christoph! 454 00:18:41,206 --> 00:18:43,137 He's right behind you! - Christoph, look out! 455 00:18:43,206 --> 00:18:45,034 - Huh? Ohh! - [blubbering, munching] 456 00:18:45,103 --> 00:18:47,000 - Ohh! 457 00:18:47,068 --> 00:18:49,103 - No, our map! 458 00:18:49,172 --> 00:18:50,586 Christoph! 459 00:18:50,655 --> 00:18:52,482 - [burps] 460 00:18:52,551 --> 00:18:54,827 - Horus, zap it! - [stammering] 461 00:18:54,896 --> 00:18:58,068 Ahh! 462 00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:01,689 Ultimate zap! 463 00:19:01,758 --> 00:19:03,931 - [blubbering] 464 00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,344 [burps] 465 00:19:06,413 --> 00:19:10,000 ♪ ♪ 466 00:19:10,068 --> 00:19:14,965 - Ah. - Ugh. 467 00:19:15,034 --> 00:19:19,206 - [sighs] - Ugh. 468 00:19:19,275 --> 00:19:22,655 - Hello? Is anybody there? Can you hear me? 469 00:19:22,724 --> 00:19:25,172 - Yep. That went well. - I seem to be stuck in a wall. 470 00:19:25,241 --> 00:19:26,310 [sickening thud] 471 00:19:26,379 --> 00:19:28,275 - Hello? - Yeah, thank goodness. 472 00:19:28,344 --> 00:19:29,758 I thought we'd messed it all up. 473 00:19:29,827 --> 00:19:33,275 - Sorry, Brendar. I know this isn't what you envisioned. 474 00:19:33,344 --> 00:19:35,206 - Someone grab my fetlock. 475 00:19:35,275 --> 00:19:38,344 - You guys would not believe the day I've had. 476 00:19:38,413 --> 00:19:41,172 - Axe, where have you-- never mind. 477 00:19:41,241 --> 00:19:42,758 - Help! - Let's just pull Christoph 478 00:19:42,827 --> 00:19:44,206 out of the wall so he can go back 479 00:19:44,275 --> 00:19:45,620 to the enchanted forest, 480 00:19:45,689 --> 00:19:48,206 and we can wander around the kingdom forever, 481 00:19:48,275 --> 00:19:50,137 looking for my brother and the demon Alvin. 482 00:19:50,206 --> 00:19:51,482 - [groans] - Yeah. 483 00:19:51,551 --> 00:19:54,896 - Christoph is not happy. - [grunting] 484 00:19:54,965 --> 00:19:56,931 [panting] 485 00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:59,172 [snorts] [inhales] 486 00:19:59,241 --> 00:20:01,206 [grumbles] 487 00:20:01,275 --> 00:20:03,103 [snorts] 488 00:20:03,172 --> 00:20:05,862 Hmm. Hm. 489 00:20:05,931 --> 00:20:10,793 - I'm sorry. We really did try to make it a night to remember. 490 00:20:10,862 --> 00:20:14,827 - Oh, this was definitely a night I will remember. 491 00:20:14,896 --> 00:20:16,827 - Oh, I guess we blew it. 492 00:20:18,448 --> 00:20:20,310 - I wouldn't say that. 493 00:20:20,379 --> 00:20:22,620 You know, I've been wined and dined 494 00:20:22,689 --> 00:20:24,793 by a lot of questors seeking my maps. 495 00:20:24,862 --> 00:20:27,896 And it's always the same thing--a boring dinner, 496 00:20:27,965 --> 00:20:30,931 obligatory massage, tedious lewd performance. 497 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,931 - Uh, well, you know, lewd performances 498 00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,172 can be pretty great when in the right hands and the-- 499 00:20:35,241 --> 00:20:36,896 What? - I think he likes us. 500 00:20:36,965 --> 00:20:38,310 - Hm, I'll tell you what. 501 00:20:38,379 --> 00:20:39,517 I'll make you that map. 502 00:20:39,586 --> 00:20:40,551 - [gasps] 503 00:20:40,620 --> 00:20:42,103 - Give me something to draw on. 504 00:20:42,172 --> 00:20:45,310 - Ah, oh, right, uh, uh, ooh. 505 00:20:46,896 --> 00:20:48,931 - Hm. - Ha! 506 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,310 How about this kids menu? 507 00:20:50,379 --> 00:20:53,896 - Perfect. Now give me your brother's shovel. 508 00:20:56,206 --> 00:20:59,517 [sniffing] Hmm. 509 00:21:01,689 --> 00:21:05,758 [humming] [all gasp] 510 00:21:05,827 --> 00:21:07,965 Ohm. - Whoa. 511 00:21:10,344 --> 00:21:12,862 [shimmering tone] 512 00:21:12,931 --> 00:21:15,206 - What? 513 00:21:16,103 --> 00:21:18,482 Whoa! Look at that! 514 00:21:18,551 --> 00:21:21,275 - [gasps] - You know, I've never seen 515 00:21:21,344 --> 00:21:22,793 a group of people work so hard, 516 00:21:22,862 --> 00:21:25,172 and have each other's backs like you all 517 00:21:25,241 --> 00:21:26,551 You make a really great team. 518 00:21:26,620 --> 00:21:28,620 - Thank you. - Aw, shucks. 519 00:21:28,689 --> 00:21:30,275 - Really? - But no offence. 520 00:21:30,344 --> 00:21:32,275 Hold onto that map because Christoph 521 00:21:32,344 --> 00:21:34,896 never wants to see any of you again. 522 00:21:34,965 --> 00:21:37,379 [snorts] - Ugh. 523 00:21:37,448 --> 00:21:40,310 - Huh. - We did it. We have the map. 524 00:21:40,379 --> 00:21:43,793 - Now, we focus on our next quest... 525 00:21:43,862 --> 00:21:46,068 saving Kendar. 526 00:21:46,137 --> 00:21:48,482 - Hang on one second. Ah. 527 00:21:48,551 --> 00:21:51,344 I think your next quest is cleanin' this place up! 528 00:21:51,413 --> 00:21:52,344 - Uh. Umm-- - Oh. 529 00:21:52,413 --> 00:21:53,310 - [sighs] - Really? 530 00:21:53,379 --> 00:21:55,103 - [blubbering] 531 00:21:55,172 --> 00:21:57,586 - Oh. - Uh, sorry about that. 532 00:21:57,655 --> 00:22:00,758 I guess I must have gone into one of my daily hibernations. 533 00:22:00,827 --> 00:22:03,758 Ah--I seem to have lost an arm. 534 00:22:03,827 --> 00:22:05,827 I guess my agent came by to collect. 535 00:22:05,896 --> 00:22:07,172 [rim shot] 536 00:22:07,241 --> 00:22:08,689 - Blammo. 537 00:22:08,739 --> 00:22:13,289 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 38758

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.