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Afterwards, he says,
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they always embrace.
3
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The animal digs his sweaty brow
into his cheek,
4
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and they stand in the dark for an hour,
5
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like a necking couple.
6
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And of all nonsensical things,
7
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I keep thinking about the horse,
8
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not the boy,
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the horse,
10
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and what he might be trying to do.
11
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I keep seeing the huge head,
12
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kissing him with its chained mouth,
13
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nudging, through the metal,
14
00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:08,252
some desire absolutely irrelevant
15
00:02:08,337 --> 00:02:11,714
to filling its belly
or propagating its own kind.
16
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What desire could this be?
17
00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:18,179
Not to stay a horse any longer?
18
00:02:18,263 --> 00:02:20,515
Not to remain reined up forever,
19
00:02:20,599 --> 00:02:23,392
in those particular genetic strings?
20
00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:27,772
Is it possible, at certain moments
we cannot imagine,
21
00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:30,107
a horse can add its sufferings together,
22
00:02:30,192 --> 00:02:33,402
the non-stop jerks and jabs
23
00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:35,947
that are its daily life...
24
00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:38,324
And turn them
25
00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:40,284
into grief?
26
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,080
What use is grief...
27
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:46,624
To a horse?
28
00:02:49,253 --> 00:02:50,545
You see...
29
00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:53,840
I'm lost.
30
00:02:55,926 --> 00:02:58,010
What use, I should be asking,
are questions like these
31
00:02:58,095 --> 00:03:02,306
to an overworked psychiatrist
in a provincial hospital?
32
00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:05,434
They're worse than useless.
33
00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:07,562
They are, in fact,
34
00:03:07,646 --> 00:03:09,105
subversive.
35
00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:13,442
The thing is...
36
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:18,698
I'm wearing that horse's head myself,
37
00:03:18,782 --> 00:03:21,784
all reined up in old language
and old assumptions,
38
00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:23,578
straining to jump, clean-hooved,
39
00:03:23,662 --> 00:03:25,079
onto a whole new track of being
40
00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:26,414
I only suspect is there.
41
00:03:26,498 --> 00:03:28,291
I can't see it, because my educated,
42
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:30,167
average head is being held
at the wrong angle.
43
00:03:30,252 --> 00:03:33,671
I can't jump, because the bit forbids it,
and my own basic force,
44
00:03:33,755 --> 00:03:35,381
my...
45
00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:38,301
Horsepower, if you like...
46
00:03:38,594 --> 00:03:40,720
Is too little.
47
00:03:40,804 --> 00:03:42,889
The only thing I know for sure, is this.
48
00:03:42,973 --> 00:03:46,893
A horse's head is finally unknowable to me.
49
00:03:46,977 --> 00:03:48,477
Yet I handle children's heads,
50
00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:50,271
which I must presume to
be more complicated,
51
00:03:50,355 --> 00:03:52,982
at least in the area of my chief concern.
52
00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:56,861
In a way, it has nothing to do with this boy.
53
00:03:56,945 --> 00:03:58,237
The doubts have been there for years,
54
00:03:58,322 --> 00:04:00,781
piling up steadily in this dreary place.
55
00:04:00,949 --> 00:04:03,075
It's only the extremity of this case
that's made them active.
56
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:05,161
I know that the extremity is the point.
57
00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:06,913
All the same, whatever the reasons,
58
00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:09,248
these doubts are now
not just vaguely worrying,
59
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:11,751
but... but intolerable!
60
00:04:20,010 --> 00:04:21,636
Forgive me.
61
00:04:23,055 --> 00:04:24,680
I'm not making much sense.
62
00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:28,309
Let me start properly, in order.
63
00:04:30,646 --> 00:04:32,104
All right.
64
00:04:32,189 --> 00:04:35,316
Come on. Break it up. Come on!
65
00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:38,611
...Through this gate, into another field.
I couldn't see it,
66
00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:41,489
but I knew I had to get through that gate.
If I could get through it,
67
00:04:41,573 --> 00:04:43,199
then that was it, I could see everything.
68
00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:46,702
All right. All right.
69
00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:51,666
Take one, Mary Ann.
70
00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:53,042
I don't want one.
71
00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:54,377
Mary Ann, come on.
72
00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:57,129
Don't bother me.
73
00:04:57,214 --> 00:04:58,965
You don't have to listen to them
all the time.
74
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:00,883
Oh, I know, but, uh...
75
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,677
- Why not?
- You want one, take one.
76
00:05:02,761 --> 00:05:03,928
Stop being so ignorant!
77
00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:06,764
All right. All right, now. Settle down.
78
00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:07,848
...Sucking it up?
79
00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:11,352
That's no good. Shall we smash it?
80
00:05:11,436 --> 00:05:12,478
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
81
00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:13,521
No.
82
00:05:13,605 --> 00:05:14,605
No?
83
00:05:14,690 --> 00:05:15,690
Come on, we'll smash it.
84
00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:17,566
No.
85
00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,360
All right, now. Now pick up your right leg.
86
00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:21,278
No.
87
00:05:21,363 --> 00:05:22,446
Pick up your right leg, man.
88
00:05:22,531 --> 00:05:24,323
Why?
89
00:05:24,908 --> 00:05:26,951
Because you'd please me
a great deal if you did.
90
00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:28,452
I said, "No"!
91
00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:34,750
Come on. Up.
92
00:05:34,835 --> 00:05:37,628
Now scream! Jab it! Louder. Go on!
93
00:05:42,467 --> 00:05:43,968
Scream! Scream!
94
00:05:45,637 --> 00:05:46,679
That's it.
95
00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:49,432
It began one Monday,
some months ago,
96
00:05:49,516 --> 00:05:51,684
with Hesther's visit.
97
00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:54,353
Martin, I'm sorry.
I should have called first, I know.
98
00:05:54,438 --> 00:05:56,689
Not at all. You're a welcome relief.
99
00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:57,773
Have a filthy coffee?
100
00:05:57,858 --> 00:05:58,983
No, please, no.
101
00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,693
It's really rather urgent.
102
00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:01,902
Take a couch.
103
00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:05,156
Martin, I've just come from
the most shocking case I ever tried.
104
00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:08,367
My fellow magistrates wanted to send him
to prison on the spot.
105
00:06:08,452 --> 00:06:10,411
I mean, luckily,
I got him remanded for a report.
106
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:11,495
Who's he?
107
00:06:11,580 --> 00:06:13,080
A teenager. The name's Strang.
108
00:06:13,165 --> 00:06:14,290
Ah.
109
00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:17,543
What's he done? Dosed some
little girl's Pepsi with Spanish fly?
110
00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:20,963
What could possibly have thrown your court
into such tory convulsions?
111
00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:23,049
He...
112
00:06:24,885 --> 00:06:27,928
Blinded 6 horses with a metal spike.
113
00:06:29,806 --> 00:06:32,141
- Blinded?
- Yes.
114
00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:33,976
All at once, or over a period?
115
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:35,770
All at once, the night before last.
116
00:06:35,854 --> 00:06:36,854
Where?
117
00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:39,356
In a stable over at Chalk Ford.
He worked there on weekends.
118
00:06:39,983 --> 00:06:40,941
What did he say in court?
119
00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:42,485
Nothing. He just sang.
120
00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:43,569
Sang?
121
00:06:43,653 --> 00:06:46,697
Martin, you've simply got to take him here.
122
00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:49,492
You think this hospital is suitable?
How dangerous is he?
123
00:06:49,785 --> 00:06:51,702
No, I mean, you, personally.
124
00:06:52,829 --> 00:06:54,663
Now look, Hesther,
before you say anything else,
125
00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:56,874
I can take no more patients at the moment.
126
00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:58,417
I can't even cope with the ones I have.
127
00:06:58,502 --> 00:06:59,752
- You must.
- Why?
128
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:03,089
Thank you. Oh, for... damn!
129
00:07:08,345 --> 00:07:10,346
Hello, Pat?
130
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,598
Yes. Now, my advice is,
cancel her leave for a month.
131
00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:15,559
See what difference that makes to her dad.
Yes, exactly.
132
00:07:16,353 --> 00:07:17,436
Now, why?
133
00:07:17,521 --> 00:07:20,231
Because there's no one else
within 100 miles of that desk
134
00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:22,900
who can handle him,
and perhaps understand
135
00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:24,443
what this is all about.
136
00:07:24,528 --> 00:07:26,278
The regular hospital will be useless,
137
00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:28,114
and so will the other doctors here.
138
00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:29,782
That's an absolutely
unwarrantable statement.
139
00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:30,825
Well, it's true.
140
00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:32,493
They'll be very cool and professional,
141
00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:35,287
and underneath, they'll be disgusted
and immovably English,
142
00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:37,081
just like my court.
143
00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:38,624
Well, what am I? Polynesian?
144
00:07:38,708 --> 00:07:40,292
Please, Martin.
145
00:07:40,377 --> 00:07:42,294
This is the last favor I'll ever ask of you.
146
00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:44,463
- No, it's not.
- No, it's not.
147
00:07:44,548 --> 00:07:47,883
I mean, he's obviously abominable.
I know that already.
148
00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:52,221
Why me? Why, Hesther?
149
00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:56,100
'Cause there's something
extraordinary about him.
150
00:07:56,184 --> 00:07:57,226
In what way?
151
00:07:57,727 --> 00:07:59,645
Terrible, if you like.
152
00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:01,272
I don't quite know what I'm saying. I'm...
153
00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:03,566
Just knew I had to come here.
154
00:08:04,234 --> 00:08:07,027
Take him, Martin. It's very important.
155
00:08:12,450 --> 00:08:14,451
What did I expect of him?
156
00:08:14,536 --> 00:08:16,662
Very little, I promise you.
157
00:08:16,746 --> 00:08:18,330
One more dented little face.
158
00:08:18,999 --> 00:08:20,749
One more adolescent freak.
159
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,918
The usual unusual.
160
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:25,754
Now, this room
will be completely yours.
161
00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:28,424
No one will come in without your say so.
162
00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:30,718
There's a bell if you need anything.
163
00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:34,180
There's a lavatory down the corridor,
2nd door on the left.
164
00:08:39,311 --> 00:08:40,811
I think this is one of the nicest rooms
165
00:08:40,896 --> 00:08:42,980
in the whole place. Don't you, Mr. Pearce?
166
00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:44,565
Absolutely.
167
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:52,907
Sometimes, I blame Hesther.
168
00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:55,784
She brought him to me.
169
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:57,494
But of course, that's nonsense.
170
00:08:57,579 --> 00:08:59,038
What is he but a last straw?
171
00:08:59,122 --> 00:09:01,123
A last symbol. That's all.
172
00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:06,253
I was ripe for the confrontation.
173
00:09:06,463 --> 00:09:07,546
Alan Strang, Doctor.
174
00:09:07,631 --> 00:09:08,964
Ah, thank you.
175
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:11,133
Hello.
176
00:09:12,594 --> 00:09:15,304
My name's, uh, Martin. Yours is Alan.
177
00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:19,642
Won't you sit down?
178
00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:22,978
For today, I just want a few simple facts.
179
00:09:24,356 --> 00:09:27,149
Uh, is... is this your full name?
180
00:09:27,317 --> 00:09:28,692
Alan Strang?
181
00:09:30,028 --> 00:09:32,947
And you're 17, is that right? 17?
182
00:09:37,285 --> 00:09:40,496
You work in an electrical shop
during the week.
183
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:42,790
Electrical and kitchenware.
184
00:09:45,001 --> 00:09:46,001
Well?
185
00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:47,753
Double Your Pleasure
Double your fun
186
00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:50,172
With Double-good, Double-good
doublemint gum
187
00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:53,092
Yes.
188
00:09:53,176 --> 00:09:56,387
Now let's see, you live with your parents,
and your father's a printer.
189
00:09:56,888 --> 00:09:57,888
What sort of things does he print?
190
00:09:57,973 --> 00:09:59,598
Double Your Pleasure
Double your fun
191
00:09:59,683 --> 00:10:01,767
With Double-good, Double-good
doublemint gum
192
00:10:02,060 --> 00:10:04,436
I mean, does he do leaflets, calendars?
Things like that?
193
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:06,772
Try the taste of martini
194
00:10:06,856 --> 00:10:09,233
The most beautiful drink in the world
195
00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:13,487
It's the bright one
The right one, that's martini
196
00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:15,948
I wish you'd sit down if you're going to sing.
197
00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:17,241
Don't you think you'd be more comfortable?
198
00:10:17,325 --> 00:10:19,285
There's only one "T" in typhoo
199
00:10:19,369 --> 00:10:21,120
In packets and in teabags, too
200
00:10:21,204 --> 00:10:23,914
Any way you make it
You'll know that it's true
201
00:10:23,999 --> 00:10:26,125
There's only one "T" in typhoo
202
00:10:27,377 --> 00:10:28,585
That's a good song.
203
00:10:28,670 --> 00:10:31,130
I like that better than the other two.
Sing that one again.
204
00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:34,425
Double Your Pleasure
Double your fun
205
00:10:34,509 --> 00:10:36,552
With Double-good, Double-good
206
00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:46,687
Now, listen.
207
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:50,691
This is not a loony bin. It's not a prison.
208
00:10:50,775 --> 00:10:51,817
If you behave yourself,
209
00:10:51,901 --> 00:10:54,361
you'll have a reasonably all right time.
210
00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:57,156
If you don't, you'll be packed off
to a mental hospital,
211
00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:59,867
and you'll find things much more restricted.
212
00:11:00,285 --> 00:11:02,077
So it's up to you.
213
00:11:02,746 --> 00:11:04,163
You'll be seeing me every day.
214
00:11:04,873 --> 00:11:07,916
Your session will last exactly 45 minutes.
215
00:11:08,126 --> 00:11:11,670
And I expect you to be absolutely on time.
All right?
216
00:11:17,385 --> 00:11:19,094
By the way...
217
00:11:19,304 --> 00:11:22,681
Which of your parents is it who won't allow
you to watch television?
218
00:11:25,185 --> 00:11:26,477
Mother?
219
00:11:27,145 --> 00:11:28,437
Father?
220
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:31,482
Or is it both?
221
00:11:33,234 --> 00:11:34,818
Come in, David.
222
00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:38,447
Uh, take Strang, here, on a tour of the...
223
00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:40,616
Hospital, before lunch.
224
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,117
You'll find it quite pleasant.
225
00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:43,702
There's a piano room,
226
00:11:43,787 --> 00:11:45,788
a darkroom for photographers,
227
00:11:46,998 --> 00:11:48,957
even a television room.
228
00:11:54,005 --> 00:11:57,466
3 nights later, I had this very specific dream.
229
00:11:57,884 --> 00:12:00,469
In it, I am a chief priest in Homeric Greece.
230
00:12:01,137 --> 00:12:04,598
I'm wearing a wide gold mask,
all noble and bearded,
231
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:08,894
like the so-called mask of Agamemnon,
found at Mycenae.
232
00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:12,272
I'm standing by a thick, round stone,
holding a sharp knife.
233
00:12:13,191 --> 00:12:14,566
In fact, I'm officiating in some
234
00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:16,735
immensely important ritual sacrifice
235
00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:18,404
on which depends the fate of the crops,
236
00:12:18,488 --> 00:12:21,323
or of a military expedition.
237
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:24,326
The sacrifice is a herd of children,
238
00:12:24,452 --> 00:12:27,162
about 500 boys and girls
stretching in a long queue,
239
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:28,580
across the plain of Argos.
240
00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:31,041
I know it's Argos, because of the red soil.
241
00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:35,462
On either side of me
stand two assistant priests,
242
00:12:35,547 --> 00:12:36,547
wearing masks as well...
243
00:12:36,631 --> 00:12:38,298
Lumpy, pop-eyed masks,
244
00:12:38,633 --> 00:12:40,676
such as were also found at Mycenae.
245
00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:42,219
They're enormously strong, these priests,
246
00:12:42,303 --> 00:12:43,762
and absolutely tireless.
247
00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:45,431
As each child steps forward,
248
00:12:45,515 --> 00:12:48,434
they grab it from behind
and throw it over the stone.
249
00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:49,768
Then, with a surgical skill
250
00:12:49,853 --> 00:12:52,521
that amazes even me, I fit in the knife,
251
00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:55,107
and slice elegantly down to the navel,
252
00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:58,026
just like a seamstress following a pattern.
253
00:12:58,361 --> 00:13:00,988
I part the flaps, sever the inner tubes,
254
00:13:01,364 --> 00:13:04,783
yank them out and throw them,
hot and steaming, on the floor.
255
00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:07,244
The other two then study
the patterns they make,
256
00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:09,663
as if they're reading hieroglyphics.
257
00:13:09,873 --> 00:13:12,124
It's obvious to me that I'm tops,
258
00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:13,500
as chief priest.
259
00:13:14,085 --> 00:13:17,713
It's this unique talent for carving
that's got me where I am.
260
00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:21,967
The only thing is,
261
00:13:22,051 --> 00:13:23,969
unknown to the others,
262
00:13:24,053 --> 00:13:27,055
I'm beginning to feel distinctly nauseous.
263
00:13:27,182 --> 00:13:29,141
And with each victim, it's getting worse.
264
00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:32,102
My face is going green behind the mask.
265
00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:35,397
Of course, I redouble my efforts
to look professional,
266
00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:37,316
cutting and snipping for all I'm worth,
267
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,067
mainly because I know
that if those two others
268
00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:41,153
so much as suspect my distress,
269
00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:44,448
and the implied doubt that this repetitive
and smelly work
270
00:13:44,532 --> 00:13:46,158
is doing any social good at all,
271
00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:49,411
then I'd be next over the stone.
272
00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:54,041
And then, of course,
the damn mask begins to slip.
273
00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:57,377
The priests both turn and look at it.
274
00:13:57,462 --> 00:14:00,047
Their gold pop-eyes suddenly fill with blood.
275
00:14:00,632 --> 00:14:03,675
They tear the knife from my hand, and I...
276
00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:07,513
I wake up.
277
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:19,233
Mrs. Strang,
278
00:14:19,317 --> 00:14:21,777
have you any idea
how this could have occurred?
279
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:25,030
No, Doctor. It's all so unbelievable.
280
00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:28,242
Alan was always such a gentle boy. Always.
281
00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:32,371
And he loves animals, especially horses.
282
00:14:32,455 --> 00:14:33,455
Thank you.
283
00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:35,207
- Especially?
- Yes.
284
00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:38,502
He even has a picture of one,
up in his bedroom.
285
00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:40,462
His father gave it to him a few years ago,
286
00:14:40,547 --> 00:14:42,047
off a calendar he'd had printed,
287
00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:44,091
and the boy's never taken it down.
288
00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:48,095
And, uh, when he was, uh, seven or eight,
289
00:14:48,513 --> 00:14:52,057
I used to have to read the same book to him,
over and over again,
290
00:14:52,141 --> 00:14:53,100
all about a horse.
291
00:14:53,184 --> 00:14:54,184
Really?
292
00:14:54,269 --> 00:14:56,687
It was called prince,
and no one could ride him.
293
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:02,317
You say he kept the picture of the horse
in his bedroom?
294
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:03,485
Yes.
295
00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:05,112
Could I see it?
296
00:15:05,196 --> 00:15:07,281
Yes. Oh, yes. Yes, of course.
297
00:15:07,532 --> 00:15:08,657
- Uh...
- Thank you.
298
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:11,076
It's, uh... Uh, please, it's this way.
299
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,667
Uh, I do remember telling him
one very odd thing.
300
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:20,919
Did you know, Doctor,
that when the Christian cavalry
301
00:15:21,004 --> 00:15:22,671
first appeared in the new world,
302
00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:25,799
the pagans thought that horse
and rider was one person?
303
00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:28,051
- One person?
- Yes.
304
00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:31,054
Of course.
305
00:15:31,556 --> 00:15:33,849
Actually, they thought it must be a God.
306
00:15:39,856 --> 00:15:41,732
In here, please.
307
00:15:41,816 --> 00:15:43,859
This is Alan's room.
308
00:16:07,842 --> 00:16:09,384
Remarkable.
309
00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:10,510
Yes.
310
00:16:15,892 --> 00:16:18,143
Mrs. Strang, is there...
311
00:16:18,936 --> 00:16:21,396
Anything else you can remember
you told him about horses?
312
00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:23,899
Anything at all?
313
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:26,902
Oh, well, they're in the Bible of course.
314
00:16:27,904 --> 00:16:30,822
"He saith among the trumpets, ha-ha!"
315
00:16:31,532 --> 00:16:33,033
"Ha-ha"?
316
00:16:33,117 --> 00:16:34,701
The Book of Job.
317
00:16:34,911 --> 00:16:36,787
Such a noble passage.
318
00:16:37,246 --> 00:16:38,664
Do you know it?
319
00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:41,500
"Hast thou given the horse strength?
320
00:16:41,584 --> 00:16:44,544
"Hast thou clothed his neck with thunder?
321
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:48,924
"The glory of his nostrils is terrible.
322
00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:51,343
"He saith among the trumpets,
323
00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:53,512
"Ha-Ha!"
324
00:16:55,932 --> 00:16:57,391
That's marvelous.
325
00:16:57,725 --> 00:16:59,267
Yes.
326
00:17:00,687 --> 00:17:02,896
Yes... Oh, there's Mr. Strang now.
327
00:17:07,944 --> 00:17:10,779
Uh, Frank,
I've got the doctor here.
328
00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:12,823
We'll come down.
329
00:17:14,158 --> 00:17:15,242
Uh...
330
00:17:15,827 --> 00:17:17,411
He's very upset.
331
00:17:17,495 --> 00:17:19,246
You understand, of course?
332
00:17:25,503 --> 00:17:28,422
Uh, this is Dr. Dysart, dear.
333
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:30,757
Mr. Strang. How do you do?
334
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,804
I was just telling Dr. Dysart, dear,
335
00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:38,473
how... how Alan always adored horses.
336
00:17:38,808 --> 00:17:40,058
Oh, yes?
337
00:17:40,143 --> 00:17:43,603
Yeah, in fact, we've always been
a very horsey family.
338
00:17:43,688 --> 00:17:46,481
Uh, well, uh, my side of it has.
339
00:17:46,566 --> 00:17:49,985
Uh, my uncle used to ride every morning
on the downs behind Brighton,
340
00:17:50,194 --> 00:17:53,697
all dressed up in a bowler hat and jodhpurs.
He used to look splendid.
341
00:17:53,990 --> 00:17:57,075
Uh, "indulging in equitation," he called it.
342
00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:58,577
Uh, I remember telling Alan
343
00:17:58,828 --> 00:18:00,996
how that word came from "equus."
344
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:02,581
"Equus"?
345
00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:04,124
The Latin word for "horse."
346
00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:05,208
Oh, yeah.
347
00:18:05,626 --> 00:18:08,086
Alan was absolutely
fascinated by that word, I know.
348
00:18:08,629 --> 00:18:12,549
I suppose because he'd never come across
one with two "u"s together before.
349
00:18:13,676 --> 00:18:15,677
My dear, have you offered
the doctor a cup of tea?
350
00:18:16,637 --> 00:18:19,556
Oh, no, no, dear, I haven't. Oh.
351
00:18:20,183 --> 00:18:22,642
You must be dying for one. Excuse me.
352
00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:32,110
Oh, yes.
353
00:18:32,904 --> 00:18:34,488
My, uh,
354
00:18:34,572 --> 00:18:36,281
my wife has, uh,
355
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:39,326
romantic ideas, if you receive my meaning.
356
00:18:39,911 --> 00:18:41,203
About her family?
357
00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:43,497
Yes. She thinks she married beneath her.
358
00:18:43,581 --> 00:18:47,334
I dare say, she did.
I don't understand these things myself.
359
00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:50,128
Would you say that she's closer
to the boy than you are?
360
00:18:50,213 --> 00:18:53,048
Oh, they've always been as thick as thieves.
361
00:18:53,716 --> 00:18:56,426
I can't say I entirely approve...
362
00:18:57,929 --> 00:19:00,430
Especially when I hear her reading
that Bible to him,
363
00:19:00,515 --> 00:19:02,349
night after night, up there in his room.
364
00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:04,768
You mean, she's, uh, religious?
365
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:07,062
Some might say excessively so.
366
00:19:07,522 --> 00:19:10,357
Mind you, that is her business, but, uh...
367
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,318
When it comes to dosing it down
the boy's throat,
368
00:19:13,402 --> 00:19:15,862
well, frankly, he's my son as well as hers.
369
00:19:16,072 --> 00:19:17,280
Bloody religion.
370
00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,700
Well, it's our only real problem
in this house,
371
00:19:20,785 --> 00:19:22,661
but I... it's insuperable.
I don't mind admitting it.
372
00:19:22,745 --> 00:19:25,580
You must excuse my husband, Doctor.
373
00:19:26,123 --> 00:19:29,334
This one subject is something
of an obsession with him.
374
00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:31,169
Isn't it, dear? You must admit.
375
00:19:31,254 --> 00:19:33,880
Call it what you like.
All that stuff, to me, is just bad sex.
376
00:19:34,549 --> 00:19:36,174
What has that got to do with Alan?
377
00:19:36,259 --> 00:19:38,176
Everything. Everything, Dora.
378
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:40,804
I don't understand. What are you saying?
379
00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:50,438
Mr. Strang, exactly how informed
380
00:19:50,523 --> 00:19:52,774
would you judge your son to be, about sex?
381
00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:55,902
I don't know.
382
00:19:55,987 --> 00:19:58,488
You didn't actually instruct him yourself?
383
00:20:00,658 --> 00:20:02,409
Well, not in so many words, no.
384
00:20:03,286 --> 00:20:05,120
Uh, did you, Mrs. Strang?
385
00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:08,290
Well, I spoke a little. Yes, I had to.
386
00:20:08,666 --> 00:20:10,041
Oh, let me help you.
387
00:20:10,126 --> 00:20:12,043
Uh, what sort of things did you tell him?
388
00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:13,962
I'm sorry if this is embarrassing.
389
00:20:14,797 --> 00:20:18,133
Uh, I told him the biological facts.
390
00:20:18,509 --> 00:20:21,303
But I also told him what I believed,
391
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:25,974
that sex is not just a biological matter,
but a spiritual one as well,
392
00:20:26,809 --> 00:20:30,145
that if God willed,
he would fall in love one day.
393
00:20:30,521 --> 00:20:31,521
Uh, sugar?
394
00:20:31,606 --> 00:20:32,606
Yes, thank you.
395
00:20:32,690 --> 00:20:35,817
Uh, that his task was to prepare himself
396
00:20:35,902 --> 00:20:38,486
for the most important happening of his life.
397
00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:40,405
And after that, if he was lucky,
398
00:20:40,489 --> 00:20:42,741
he would come to know a higher love, still.
399
00:20:45,995 --> 00:20:48,747
There, now. There, now, Dora.
Dora, it's all right. Come on.
400
00:20:48,831 --> 00:20:51,458
Oh, God. Laugh. Laugh, as usual.
401
00:20:51,542 --> 00:20:53,293
No one is laughing, Dora.
402
00:20:53,878 --> 00:20:55,253
Dora.
403
00:21:03,054 --> 00:21:04,554
Equus.
404
00:21:04,722 --> 00:21:06,014
Eh...
405
00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:10,602
Equus!
406
00:21:10,686 --> 00:21:11,811
Equus! Equus!
407
00:21:11,896 --> 00:21:13,939
Eq... Equus! Equus!
408
00:21:14,023 --> 00:21:15,273
Equus!
409
00:21:26,702 --> 00:21:30,038
Suddenly, I realized whose face
I'd seen in my dream.
410
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:33,667
On every victim across the stone,
411
00:21:34,377 --> 00:21:36,628
it was his stare accusing me.
412
00:21:37,380 --> 00:21:39,005
But what of?
413
00:21:59,902 --> 00:22:01,403
Well...
414
00:22:03,197 --> 00:22:05,532
How are you this morning?
415
00:22:05,741 --> 00:22:09,577
Sorry if I gave you a start last night, I...
416
00:22:10,663 --> 00:22:12,497
I was collecting some papers
from my office,
417
00:22:12,581 --> 00:22:15,291
and I thought I'd look in on you.
418
00:22:22,258 --> 00:22:28,179
Do you dream often?
419
00:22:31,017 --> 00:22:32,767
Do you?
420
00:22:33,102 --> 00:22:35,854
It's my job to ask the questions,
yours to answer them.
421
00:22:35,938 --> 00:22:38,523
- Says who?
- Says me.
422
00:22:38,607 --> 00:22:40,442
Do you dream often?
423
00:22:40,985 --> 00:22:42,110
Do you?
424
00:22:42,194 --> 00:22:43,194
Now, look, Alan...
425
00:22:43,279 --> 00:22:44,779
I'll answer if you answer.
426
00:22:45,281 --> 00:22:46,656
In turns.
427
00:22:48,617 --> 00:22:49,993
Very well.
428
00:22:50,077 --> 00:22:51,703
Only, we have to speak the truth.
429
00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:53,329
Very well.
430
00:22:53,539 --> 00:22:54,706
So.
431
00:22:55,624 --> 00:22:56,791
Do you dream often?
432
00:22:56,876 --> 00:22:58,293
Yes.
433
00:22:58,377 --> 00:23:00,462
- Do you?
- Yes.
434
00:23:00,546 --> 00:23:03,089
Do you have a special dream?
435
00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:04,507
No.
436
00:23:05,134 --> 00:23:06,551
Do you?
437
00:23:07,470 --> 00:23:10,847
Yes. What was your dream about last night?
438
00:23:10,931 --> 00:23:11,890
Can't remember. What's yours about?
439
00:23:11,974 --> 00:23:12,974
I said, the truth.
440
00:23:13,059 --> 00:23:16,561
That is the truth. What's yours about?
The special one.
441
00:23:18,314 --> 00:23:19,481
Carving up children.
442
00:23:21,442 --> 00:23:22,942
It's my turn.
443
00:23:24,987 --> 00:23:27,614
What is your first memory of a horse?
444
00:23:28,657 --> 00:23:30,283
I can't remember.
445
00:23:31,535 --> 00:23:34,913
You have no recollection of the first time
you ever noticed a horse?
446
00:23:34,997 --> 00:23:37,290
I just told you. It's my turn.
447
00:23:37,374 --> 00:23:38,833
All right.
448
00:23:39,418 --> 00:23:41,127
Are you married?
449
00:23:42,004 --> 00:23:43,254
I am.
450
00:23:43,839 --> 00:23:45,340
Is she a doctor, too?
451
00:23:45,633 --> 00:23:46,925
My turn.
452
00:23:49,428 --> 00:23:50,678
What, uh...
453
00:23:53,057 --> 00:23:55,725
What is, uh, "Eq"?
454
00:23:57,853 --> 00:23:59,604
You shouted it out in your sleep last night.
455
00:23:59,688 --> 00:24:02,357
I thought perhaps you might like
to talk about it.
456
00:24:03,818 --> 00:24:07,195
Plop, plop, fizz, fizz
457
00:24:07,655 --> 00:24:10,448
Oh, what a relief it is
458
00:24:10,991 --> 00:24:12,075
Plop, plop
459
00:24:12,159 --> 00:24:15,370
Come on now, Alan,
you can do better than that.
460
00:24:15,454 --> 00:24:19,499
So, Double Your pleasure
double your fun
461
00:24:19,875 --> 00:24:24,129
You Can Double Everything
Rolled into one, one
462
00:24:25,881 --> 00:24:27,715
All right, good morning.
463
00:24:31,554 --> 00:24:32,554
What do you mean?
464
00:24:33,764 --> 00:24:35,223
We're finished for today.
465
00:24:36,684 --> 00:24:37,851
Only had five minutes.
466
00:24:37,935 --> 00:24:40,061
Too bad.
467
00:24:44,483 --> 00:24:46,359
Didn't you hear me? I said, "Good morning."
468
00:24:46,443 --> 00:24:47,485
Well, that's not fair.
469
00:24:47,570 --> 00:24:49,487
- No?
- No.
470
00:24:49,738 --> 00:24:51,990
The government pays
you £50 an hour to see me.
471
00:24:52,074 --> 00:24:53,241
I know, I heard, downstairs.
472
00:24:53,784 --> 00:24:55,451
So, go back downstairs
and hear some more.
473
00:24:56,287 --> 00:24:57,871
That's not fair.
474
00:24:58,581 --> 00:25:00,123
You're a swizz.
475
00:25:00,916 --> 00:25:03,001
Bloody swizz! Swizz!
476
00:25:03,127 --> 00:25:04,335
Do I have to call a nurse?
477
00:25:04,420 --> 00:25:05,753
She puts a finger on me, and I'll bash her.
478
00:25:06,130 --> 00:25:09,382
She'll bash you a damn sight harder,
I can assure you of that.
479
00:25:09,508 --> 00:25:10,842
Now, go.
480
00:25:39,038 --> 00:25:40,288
On a beach.
481
00:25:40,372 --> 00:25:41,539
What?
482
00:25:41,624 --> 00:25:42,999
Where I first saw a horse.
483
00:25:44,126 --> 00:25:45,168
Sod.
484
00:25:48,464 --> 00:25:49,797
How old were you?
485
00:25:49,965 --> 00:25:52,508
How should I know? Six.
486
00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:55,720
What were you doing there?
487
00:25:55,804 --> 00:25:57,096
Nothing.
488
00:25:58,390 --> 00:25:59,807
Digging.
489
00:26:01,185 --> 00:26:02,560
Sandcastles?
490
00:26:02,645 --> 00:26:04,145
Well, what else?
491
00:26:06,982 --> 00:26:08,399
Go on.
492
00:27:01,120 --> 00:27:02,787
That's a terrific castle.
493
00:27:05,165 --> 00:27:07,083
It must've taken a long time to build.
494
00:27:10,713 --> 00:27:14,007
You can stroke him if you like.
He won't mind.
495
00:27:15,801 --> 00:27:19,762
His name's Trojan. Easy there, Troj.
496
00:27:19,847 --> 00:27:21,723
Easy, boy.
497
00:27:21,807 --> 00:27:23,224
Easy there, Trojan.
498
00:27:26,437 --> 00:27:30,315
Oh, you can hardly reach from down there.
You want to come up?
499
00:27:38,032 --> 00:27:39,657
Come on, then.
500
00:27:41,577 --> 00:27:43,077
No, come round this side.
501
00:27:43,162 --> 00:27:45,330
You always mount a horse from the left.
502
00:27:45,414 --> 00:27:47,915
I'll give you a lift up, okay?
503
00:27:54,923 --> 00:27:56,632
Now, do nothing at all.
504
00:27:56,717 --> 00:27:58,593
Easy, boy! Easy!
505
00:27:59,928 --> 00:28:01,012
Don't be frightened, now.
506
00:28:01,096 --> 00:28:03,264
Hold on tight to his mane
and grip with your knees.
507
00:28:03,349 --> 00:28:05,391
That's it. Come on, now. Let's go.
508
00:28:23,994 --> 00:28:25,870
Do you want to go faster?
509
00:28:27,206 --> 00:28:28,956
All you have to do is say,
510
00:28:29,083 --> 00:28:31,209
"Come on, Trojan, bear me away."
511
00:28:33,462 --> 00:28:34,754
Say it, then!
512
00:28:35,464 --> 00:28:36,923
Bear me away.
513
00:28:37,007 --> 00:28:38,383
I can't hear you. Say it!
514
00:28:40,761 --> 00:28:42,220
Bear me away!
515
00:28:42,304 --> 00:28:43,638
Come on, Trojan!
516
00:29:10,416 --> 00:29:11,916
Alan!
517
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:13,209
Alan! Alan!
518
00:29:13,293 --> 00:29:14,710
- Alan!
- Alan!
519
00:29:17,673 --> 00:29:19,173
Alan!
520
00:29:19,299 --> 00:29:20,508
Alan!
521
00:29:21,301 --> 00:29:23,261
What... Come back here!
522
00:29:23,345 --> 00:29:24,429
Alan!
523
00:29:27,015 --> 00:29:29,267
Alan! Alan. Hey, you!
524
00:29:29,351 --> 00:29:30,685
Easy, boy, easy.
525
00:29:30,853 --> 00:29:32,186
What do you imagine you're doing?
526
00:29:32,271 --> 00:29:34,147
- Imagine?
- What is my son doing up there?
527
00:29:34,231 --> 00:29:35,857
It's all right, Frank. He's not hurt, is he?
528
00:29:36,024 --> 00:29:37,275
Don't you think to ask permission
529
00:29:37,359 --> 00:29:38,568
before doing a thing stupid like that?
530
00:29:38,652 --> 00:29:39,777
It's lovely, Dad.
531
00:29:39,862 --> 00:29:41,863
The boy is perfectly safe.
Please don't be hysterical!
532
00:29:41,947 --> 00:29:43,656
Don't you be la-de-da with me, young man.
533
00:29:43,740 --> 00:29:45,241
Come down, here, Alan,
you heard what your mother said.
534
00:29:45,325 --> 00:29:46,367
No.
535
00:29:46,452 --> 00:29:47,827
- Come down here at once.
- No.
536
00:29:47,911 --> 00:29:49,871
- Right this moment! I said, this moment!
- No.
537
00:29:49,955 --> 00:29:51,038
Frank.
538
00:29:51,123 --> 00:29:52,123
Ugh!
539
00:29:52,207 --> 00:29:53,958
Watch it! Are you mad?
540
00:29:54,042 --> 00:29:55,001
Alan!
541
00:29:55,085 --> 00:29:56,711
Do you want to terrify the horse?
542
00:29:56,795 --> 00:29:58,171
You're a public menace, you know that?
543
00:29:58,255 --> 00:29:59,297
Easy, Trojan.
544
00:29:59,381 --> 00:30:01,716
How dare you pick up children
and put them on dangerous animals!
545
00:30:01,967 --> 00:30:03,718
- Dangerous?
- Frank, the boy's hurt.
546
00:30:03,802 --> 00:30:05,595
Look at his eyes, they're rolling.
547
00:30:05,679 --> 00:30:06,721
So are yours.
548
00:30:06,805 --> 00:30:10,141
Frank, he's cut himself. The boy's hurt.
549
00:30:10,225 --> 00:30:14,145
I'm not, I'm not! I'm not!
550
00:30:14,229 --> 00:30:16,689
I'm not, I'm not! I'm not!
551
00:30:26,658 --> 00:30:28,534
That's all I remember.
552
00:30:32,748 --> 00:30:34,165
And a lot, too.
553
00:30:38,420 --> 00:30:39,670
Thank you.
554
00:30:45,052 --> 00:30:46,427
Do you know...
555
00:30:52,768 --> 00:30:55,645
Do you know, I've...
I've never been on a horse in my life?
556
00:30:55,729 --> 00:30:56,812
Nor me.
557
00:30:58,148 --> 00:30:59,899
You mean, since that?
558
00:31:00,192 --> 00:31:01,275
Yeah.
559
00:31:01,610 --> 00:31:03,027
Never?
560
00:31:03,737 --> 00:31:04,695
No.
561
00:31:04,780 --> 00:31:05,988
How come?
562
00:31:06,949 --> 00:31:08,032
I didn't care to.
563
00:31:09,117 --> 00:31:12,119
You mean to say, you never rode,
even when you were at the stables?
564
00:31:12,788 --> 00:31:13,829
No.
565
00:31:13,914 --> 00:31:16,040
Wasn't that part of the job?
566
00:31:16,458 --> 00:31:17,792
No, didn't have to.
567
00:31:18,418 --> 00:31:21,587
Why not? Surely it would've been fun,
after being cooped up in that shop all week.
568
00:31:21,964 --> 00:31:23,214
Just didn't care to, that's all.
569
00:31:23,298 --> 00:31:25,758
Anyway, it's my turn.
I told you a secret, you tell me one.
570
00:31:30,472 --> 00:31:31,639
All right.
571
00:31:33,267 --> 00:31:34,934
There are patients who have things
to tell me,
572
00:31:35,018 --> 00:31:37,061
but they're ashamed to...
573
00:31:37,145 --> 00:31:40,690
Say them to my face.
What do you think I do about that?
574
00:31:40,816 --> 00:31:41,983
What?
575
00:31:43,235 --> 00:31:45,945
I give them this little tape recorder.
576
00:31:47,155 --> 00:31:49,907
They go off to another room,
and they send the tape back through nurse.
577
00:31:49,992 --> 00:31:51,742
They don't have to listen to it with me.
578
00:31:51,827 --> 00:31:53,286
Stupid.
579
00:31:53,745 --> 00:31:57,748
Quite simple, really.
You press this button and speak into this.
580
00:31:59,084 --> 00:32:01,836
Anyway, our time's up for today.
I'll see you tomorrow.
581
00:32:02,421 --> 00:32:03,588
Maybe.
582
00:32:03,672 --> 00:32:04,630
Maybe?
583
00:32:04,715 --> 00:32:06,340
If I feel like it.
584
00:32:28,989 --> 00:32:30,698
Stupid.
585
00:32:58,560 --> 00:33:00,853
I thought I'd go in tomorrow,
586
00:33:01,396 --> 00:33:02,980
and see the boy.
587
00:33:06,777 --> 00:33:08,319
Would you come?
588
00:33:13,742 --> 00:33:16,994
Frank, it's not right, your not...
589
00:33:20,290 --> 00:33:21,832
But you should.
590
00:34:02,999 --> 00:34:05,501
You've got to tell him.
591
00:34:05,669 --> 00:34:07,712
The doctor, I mean.
592
00:34:07,796 --> 00:34:09,630
He should know about that.
593
00:34:09,715 --> 00:34:10,881
You think it's important?
594
00:34:10,966 --> 00:34:12,591
Yes, I do.
595
00:34:12,676 --> 00:34:13,926
Why?
596
00:34:15,554 --> 00:34:17,471
Well, it just could be.
597
00:34:25,981 --> 00:34:28,899
It was sexy.
That's what you want to know, isn't it?
598
00:34:41,663 --> 00:34:42,705
Hello?
599
00:34:42,789 --> 00:34:44,707
Hello, Doctor.
I hope it's not too late.
600
00:34:44,791 --> 00:34:46,000
Uh, no, Mrs. Strang.
601
00:34:46,710 --> 00:34:49,587
Uh, no, it's just that,
uh, Mr. Strang and I were talking,
602
00:34:49,671 --> 00:34:51,922
and we felt there was something
you might want to know.
603
00:34:52,507 --> 00:34:54,967
Could I come and see you tomorrow?
604
00:34:55,802 --> 00:34:57,470
Why don't I come to see you?
605
00:34:58,472 --> 00:35:00,681
I'm talking about the beach,
606
00:35:00,807 --> 00:35:03,142
that time that I told you about.
607
00:35:05,353 --> 00:35:07,813
I was pushed forward on the horse.
608
00:35:08,940 --> 00:35:11,859
There was sweat on my legs from his neck.
609
00:35:12,778 --> 00:35:14,862
His sides were all warm...
610
00:35:16,031 --> 00:35:17,448
The smell...
611
00:35:18,575 --> 00:35:20,284
And turning him...
612
00:35:21,828 --> 00:35:24,663
All that power, going anywhere you wanted.
613
00:35:26,208 --> 00:35:27,833
And then, Dad...
614
00:35:40,597 --> 00:35:43,140
It's about the picture...
615
00:35:43,517 --> 00:35:45,059
Of the horse.
616
00:35:45,310 --> 00:35:47,937
Uh, the one on his bedroom wall?
617
00:35:48,897 --> 00:35:53,108
I'm afraid I...
I didn't quite tell you all about it... last time.
618
00:35:53,735 --> 00:35:56,362
I didn't think it was that important.
619
00:35:56,905 --> 00:35:58,489
You see...
620
00:35:58,698 --> 00:36:02,451
It actually took the place
of another kind of picture altogether.
621
00:36:02,577 --> 00:36:04,078
What kind?
622
00:36:04,746 --> 00:36:07,998
It was a reproduction of our Lord
on his way to Calvary.
623
00:36:08,875 --> 00:36:12,586
Uh, Alan insisted on buying
it with his own pocket money,
624
00:36:12,712 --> 00:36:16,590
and hanging it where he could see it,
last thing at night.
625
00:36:17,050 --> 00:36:19,426
My husband was very displeased.
626
00:36:19,636 --> 00:36:22,721
And, to be fair, it is a little extreme.
627
00:36:23,515 --> 00:36:25,140
Then, one day,
628
00:36:25,517 --> 00:36:29,103
Mr. Strang and I had one
of our tiffs about religion,
629
00:36:29,771 --> 00:36:31,730
and he went straight up the stairs,
630
00:36:31,815 --> 00:36:34,149
and tore it off the boy's wall.
631
00:36:34,609 --> 00:36:36,819
Alan went quite hysterical.
632
00:36:36,903 --> 00:36:39,446
He cried for days, without stopping.
633
00:36:39,614 --> 00:36:41,991
But he recovered when
he was given the picture of the horse?
634
00:36:42,075 --> 00:36:43,576
Oh, yes.
635
00:36:43,660 --> 00:36:47,454
Uh, he hung it in exactly the same place.
636
00:36:48,373 --> 00:36:50,624
And we had no more of that awful weeping.
637
00:39:12,475 --> 00:39:13,892
Mr. Dalton?
638
00:39:15,020 --> 00:39:16,437
My name is Dysart. I'm a doctor.
639
00:39:16,813 --> 00:39:20,774
I'm dealing with Alan Strang.
I mean, I'm treating Alan Strang.
640
00:39:21,609 --> 00:39:23,694
I know this is an intrusion, but I,
641
00:39:23,778 --> 00:39:25,654
I'd like to have a talk with you.
642
00:39:26,281 --> 00:39:28,615
I realize this must be difficult for you.
643
00:39:29,159 --> 00:39:30,367
Difficult?
644
00:39:30,952 --> 00:39:33,037
For lack of a word.
645
00:39:33,121 --> 00:39:36,248
If I had my way,
that boy would be dead.
646
00:39:36,332 --> 00:39:38,751
I should have killed him that night.
647
00:39:38,835 --> 00:39:40,961
Of course, now you've got him in hospital.
648
00:39:41,129 --> 00:39:43,297
Private room, three meals a day,
649
00:39:43,423 --> 00:39:47,301
remedial therapy, ping-pong, basketwork.
650
00:39:48,178 --> 00:39:49,303
Hmph.
651
00:39:49,763 --> 00:39:51,597
- Mr. Dalton...
- No, no, no. Quite right.
652
00:39:51,681 --> 00:39:53,682
We've got to be, uh, modern about it.
653
00:39:53,767 --> 00:39:57,144
After all, there are no criminals now.
654
00:39:57,854 --> 00:39:59,396
We're all capable of everything.
655
00:39:59,481 --> 00:40:01,440
I know. I've heard all about it.
656
00:40:01,524 --> 00:40:03,734
Forgive and forget...
657
00:40:03,860 --> 00:40:05,819
Two months ping-pong...
658
00:40:05,904 --> 00:40:07,988
He's paid his debt to society, eh?
659
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:20,501
Mr. Dalton?
660
00:40:21,419 --> 00:40:22,795
Damn you!
661
00:40:27,092 --> 00:40:29,176
I'm sorry, I can't help it.
662
00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:31,595
I keep seeing it.
663
00:40:31,679 --> 00:40:33,639
Over and over, I see it.
664
00:40:33,723 --> 00:40:35,057
Jill's had a breakdown.
665
00:40:35,141 --> 00:40:37,059
- Jill?
- The girl who worked for me.
666
00:40:37,143 --> 00:40:39,937
Complete and utter breakdown.
She'll never get over it.
667
00:40:40,105 --> 00:40:41,396
Of course, she blames herself,
668
00:40:41,481 --> 00:40:43,440
being the one who brought him here
to begin with.
669
00:40:43,525 --> 00:40:45,609
He was introduced to the stables by a girl?
670
00:40:45,693 --> 00:40:48,695
I just told you, didn't I? Jill, Jill Mason.
671
00:40:49,280 --> 00:40:52,116
Excuse me for being stupid,
but was that his girlfriend?
672
00:40:52,200 --> 00:40:53,617
How should I know?
673
00:40:53,701 --> 00:40:56,620
No, he met up with her somewhere,
asked for a job.
674
00:40:56,704 --> 00:40:59,039
She told him to come and see me.
675
00:40:59,415 --> 00:41:00,958
Piss off now, will you?
676
00:41:01,042 --> 00:41:02,209
Yes, I'll be going.
677
00:41:03,002 --> 00:41:06,088
One thing, when he first appeared,
did he seem at all peculiar?
678
00:41:06,172 --> 00:41:07,631
I mean, odd in any way?
679
00:41:07,715 --> 00:41:09,007
No.
680
00:41:09,509 --> 00:41:11,260
He did bloody good.
681
00:41:11,928 --> 00:41:14,555
He spent hours with the horses,
cleaning and grooming,
682
00:41:14,639 --> 00:41:16,682
way over the call of duty.
683
00:41:17,809 --> 00:41:20,060
I thought he was a real find.
684
00:41:21,563 --> 00:41:22,980
Apparently, the whole time
he worked for you,
685
00:41:23,064 --> 00:41:24,773
he never actually rode.
686
00:41:25,650 --> 00:41:26,775
That's true.
687
00:41:26,860 --> 00:41:28,360
Wasn't that peculiar?
688
00:41:28,444 --> 00:41:30,195
Certainly, if he didn't.
689
00:41:31,573 --> 00:41:32,739
What do you mean?
690
00:41:33,324 --> 00:41:36,201
I mean that, on and off, that whole year,
691
00:41:36,452 --> 00:41:37,953
I had the feeling
692
00:41:38,037 --> 00:41:40,080
the horses were being taken out at night.
693
00:41:41,291 --> 00:41:42,499
At night?
694
00:41:42,584 --> 00:41:44,418
Oh, just odd things I noticed.
695
00:41:45,044 --> 00:41:46,753
I mean...
696
00:41:46,838 --> 00:41:50,340
Too often, one or other of them
would be sweaty first thing in the morning,
697
00:41:50,425 --> 00:41:53,010
when it wasn't sick. Very sweaty, too.
698
00:41:53,094 --> 00:41:55,179
And its stall wouldn't be nearly
as mucky as it should be,
699
00:41:55,263 --> 00:41:57,097
if it had been in all night.
700
00:41:57,182 --> 00:42:00,893
Stupidly enough,
I never paid much mind to it at the time.
701
00:42:00,977 --> 00:42:04,438
It wasn't until I realized
I'd been hiring a loony
702
00:42:05,273 --> 00:42:08,275
that I came to wonder
if he hadn't been riding
703
00:42:08,359 --> 00:42:09,943
all the time, behind our backs.
704
00:42:15,950 --> 00:42:18,744
All right, it's obviously just my fancy.
705
00:42:18,995 --> 00:42:20,787
This thing has shaken me so badly,
706
00:42:20,872 --> 00:42:23,081
I'm liable to believe anything.
707
00:42:25,668 --> 00:42:27,002
Why should anybody do that?
708
00:42:29,672 --> 00:42:32,090
Why should any boy prefer
to go riding by himself at night,
709
00:42:32,175 --> 00:42:35,344
when he could go off with others
during the day?
710
00:42:36,137 --> 00:42:37,971
Are you asking me?
711
00:42:38,056 --> 00:42:40,057
He's a loony, isn't he?
712
00:42:55,406 --> 00:42:57,157
This girl, Jill Mason,
713
00:42:57,242 --> 00:42:59,576
could you tell me where she lives?
714
00:42:59,661 --> 00:43:02,621
Her mother keeps a shop,
a mile down the road.
715
00:43:02,705 --> 00:43:04,248
Sells the antiques.
716
00:43:05,041 --> 00:43:06,083
Thank you.
717
00:43:06,668 --> 00:43:08,335
You won't see her.
718
00:43:15,510 --> 00:43:17,219
And something else.
719
00:43:17,303 --> 00:43:20,764
When the horse first appeared,
I looked up into his mouth.
720
00:43:20,848 --> 00:43:22,933
There was this chain in it.
721
00:43:25,687 --> 00:43:28,355
I said, "Does it hurt?" And he...
722
00:43:28,439 --> 00:43:30,315
The horse said...
723
00:43:59,429 --> 00:44:01,972
It was always the same, after that.
724
00:44:02,765 --> 00:44:05,183
Every time I heard one clop by,
I had to run and see.
725
00:44:07,228 --> 00:44:09,021
Up a country lane...
726
00:44:10,690 --> 00:44:12,232
Anywhere...
727
00:44:17,030 --> 00:44:19,239
Just to watch their skins...
728
00:44:20,742 --> 00:44:22,993
And the way their necks twist.
729
00:44:24,662 --> 00:44:26,872
The sweat comes in the folds.
730
00:44:29,167 --> 00:44:31,126
Words like "reins,"
731
00:44:31,711 --> 00:44:33,962
"stirrups," "flanks..."
732
00:44:34,047 --> 00:44:36,715
"Dashing his spurs against
his charger's flanks..."
733
00:44:36,799 --> 00:44:39,051
Even those words made me...
734
00:44:40,053 --> 00:44:42,596
The way they give themselves to us.
735
00:44:43,222 --> 00:44:44,556
That was it, too.
736
00:44:47,018 --> 00:44:51,104
They could stamp us into bits
anytime they wanted, and they don't.
737
00:44:51,689 --> 00:44:56,193
They just let themselves be turned
on a string all day, absolutely humble.
738
00:44:57,820 --> 00:45:02,115
They give us all their strength,
and we just give them stripes for it.
739
00:45:04,369 --> 00:45:06,119
They'll run forever.
740
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:09,956
They'll gallop till they die, they will...
741
00:45:11,084 --> 00:45:13,126
If we don't say "stop."
742
00:45:15,296 --> 00:45:17,047
They live for us...
743
00:45:18,049 --> 00:45:19,591
Just for us...
744
00:45:20,718 --> 00:45:22,427
Their whole lives.
745
00:45:25,681 --> 00:45:27,933
Years, I've never told anyone.
746
00:45:29,310 --> 00:45:32,187
My mum wouldn't understand.
She likes equitation,
747
00:45:32,271 --> 00:45:34,398
bowler hats, jodhpurs.
748
00:45:34,816 --> 00:45:36,858
My uncle dressed for the horses, she says.
749
00:45:36,943 --> 00:45:38,902
But what does that mean?
750
00:45:38,986 --> 00:45:40,070
Horse isn't dressed.
751
00:45:41,531 --> 00:45:42,781
It's naked.
752
00:45:42,865 --> 00:45:47,494
It's the most naked thing you ever saw,
more than a dog, a cat, or anything.
753
00:45:47,578 --> 00:45:50,455
Even the brokenest-down
old nag has got its life.
754
00:45:50,540 --> 00:45:53,375
Put a bowler hat on top of it... filthy.
755
00:45:53,459 --> 00:45:55,877
Putting them through their paces,
bloody horse shows.
756
00:45:55,962 --> 00:45:57,629
How do they dare?
757
00:45:58,506 --> 00:46:00,632
No one understands. No one.
758
00:46:02,885 --> 00:46:05,470
Except cowboys. They do.
759
00:46:06,264 --> 00:46:10,851
But they're free. They just swing up,
and it's nothing but miles of grass.
760
00:46:12,520 --> 00:46:14,813
I bet all cowboys are orphans.
761
00:46:15,231 --> 00:46:16,815
I bet they are.
762
00:46:17,692 --> 00:46:19,776
No one ever says to cowboys,
763
00:46:19,861 --> 00:46:21,778
"Receive my meaning" or God.
764
00:46:21,863 --> 00:46:25,740
"All the time, God sees you, Alan.
God's got eyes everywhere."
765
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:27,826
No, I'm not doing anymore, I hate this.
766
00:46:27,910 --> 00:46:29,703
You can whistle for anymore. I've had it.
767
00:46:38,504 --> 00:46:40,547
I'm very busy, you know.
768
00:46:40,631 --> 00:46:42,924
That's why I came to see you.
769
00:46:44,802 --> 00:46:47,220
Mr. Strang, is there something
you're not telling me?
770
00:46:47,305 --> 00:46:48,638
What do you mean?
771
00:46:48,723 --> 00:46:52,809
The last time we met, you said
that religion was at the bottom of all this.
772
00:46:52,894 --> 00:46:53,977
So it is.
773
00:46:54,061 --> 00:46:56,480
Well, just because his mother
reads him the Bible?
774
00:46:56,564 --> 00:46:58,231
Night after night.
775
00:46:59,108 --> 00:47:00,150
Fifty years ago,
776
00:47:00,234 --> 00:47:04,070
that would've been considered
proper conduct for a mother.
777
00:47:05,781 --> 00:47:07,574
Mr. Strang, I know I'm being impertinent.
778
00:47:07,658 --> 00:47:10,744
I'm prying, and I'm nosy.
779
00:47:13,039 --> 00:47:16,416
But if you want to help Alan,
you've got to help me.
780
00:47:17,585 --> 00:47:19,878
Anything will do, Mr. Strang.
781
00:47:20,838 --> 00:47:22,464
Any bloody thing!
782
00:47:45,404 --> 00:47:47,364
Your wife told me about the picture.
783
00:47:47,448 --> 00:47:49,574
No, it's not that, it's...
784
00:47:52,954 --> 00:47:54,663
It's about that.
785
00:47:58,084 --> 00:47:59,668
But it's worse.
786
00:48:03,923 --> 00:48:08,301
I wanted to tell you the other day,
but I couldn't in front of Dora.
787
00:48:08,386 --> 00:48:10,053
Maybe I should have.
788
00:48:10,137 --> 00:48:14,724
It might show her all that stuff leads to,
she drills into the boy, behind my back.
789
00:48:14,809 --> 00:48:15,892
What kind of thing is it?
790
00:48:18,563 --> 00:48:19,813
It's something I witnessed.
791
00:48:19,897 --> 00:48:21,106
Where?
792
00:48:21,983 --> 00:48:23,233
At home,
793
00:48:23,609 --> 00:48:24,818
18 months ago.
794
00:48:26,529 --> 00:48:27,612
Go on.
795
00:48:28,864 --> 00:48:30,865
It was, uh, it was late.
796
00:48:32,493 --> 00:48:35,579
The boy had been in bed hours,
or so I thought.
797
00:48:36,163 --> 00:48:37,330
Go on.
798
00:48:39,875 --> 00:48:42,168
As I came out of the bathroom,
799
00:48:43,504 --> 00:48:45,005
I heard...
800
00:48:45,881 --> 00:48:47,716
I heard the noise of this chanting.
801
00:48:48,968 --> 00:48:50,176
Chanting?
802
00:48:50,261 --> 00:48:51,344
Yes, you know.
803
00:48:52,179 --> 00:48:55,932
By the Bible, you know, one of those lists
his mother was always reading to him.
804
00:48:56,017 --> 00:49:00,103
Those "begat, so and so, begat..."
you know, genealogy. But, uh...
805
00:49:00,479 --> 00:49:02,856
What did Alan's list sound like?
806
00:49:03,524 --> 00:49:06,192
Well, I remember the sort of thing I...
807
00:49:07,945 --> 00:49:09,279
The first word I heard was...
808
00:49:09,614 --> 00:49:11,656
Prince.
809
00:49:12,533 --> 00:49:14,826
- Prince?
- Yeah.
810
00:49:15,578 --> 00:49:17,621
Prince begat Prance.
811
00:49:19,248 --> 00:49:21,625
And Prance begat Prankus.
812
00:49:24,712 --> 00:49:27,047
And Prankus begat Flankus.
813
00:49:29,717 --> 00:49:31,718
And Flankus begat Spankus.
814
00:49:34,847 --> 00:49:38,850
And Spankus begat Spunkus the great,
who lived threescore years.
815
00:49:42,063 --> 00:49:44,105
And Legwus begat Neckwus.
816
00:49:46,776 --> 00:49:49,778
And Neckwus begat Fleckwus,
the king of spit.
817
00:49:54,241 --> 00:49:57,285
And Fleckwus spoke out of his
chinkle-chankle.
818
00:49:57,495 --> 00:49:58,578
What?
819
00:49:58,954 --> 00:50:02,248
I'm sure that was the word.
I've never forgotten it.
820
00:50:02,333 --> 00:50:04,042
"Chinkle-chankle."
821
00:50:05,961 --> 00:50:09,756
And he said "Behold, I give you Equus,
my only begotten son."
822
00:50:11,842 --> 00:50:13,009
Equus?
823
00:50:13,260 --> 00:50:17,263
There's no doubt of that,
he repeated that word several times.
824
00:50:17,348 --> 00:50:18,431
"Equus...
825
00:50:20,393 --> 00:50:22,268
"My only begotten son."
826
00:50:26,607 --> 00:50:27,941
And then...
827
00:50:28,442 --> 00:50:29,943
He took this...
828
00:50:31,529 --> 00:50:32,779
String,
829
00:50:34,532 --> 00:50:37,117
and he put it in his mouth, and...
830
00:50:39,245 --> 00:50:41,121
With his other hand...
831
00:50:43,207 --> 00:50:44,457
He picked up this...
832
00:50:46,711 --> 00:50:48,962
Coat hanger, this wooden coat hanger...
833
00:50:49,213 --> 00:50:51,840
Equus.
834
00:50:55,219 --> 00:50:56,928
And he...
835
00:51:00,641 --> 00:51:03,017
Equus.
836
00:51:05,146 --> 00:51:06,813
Equus.
837
00:51:46,812 --> 00:51:48,938
Well, you see why I...
838
00:51:49,023 --> 00:51:51,149
I couldn't tell his mother.
839
00:51:52,401 --> 00:51:56,029
Religion. Religion is the bottom of this,
don't you see?
840
00:51:58,908 --> 00:52:00,450
Did you speak to him about it later?
841
00:52:02,912 --> 00:52:03,953
No.
842
00:52:04,663 --> 00:52:06,456
I can't speak about things like that, Doctor.
843
00:52:06,540 --> 00:52:08,458
It's not in my nature.
844
00:52:11,170 --> 00:52:12,337
No.
845
00:52:13,380 --> 00:52:14,798
I see that.
846
00:52:19,011 --> 00:52:20,595
Here, let me help you.
847
00:52:22,056 --> 00:52:23,389
Just run it under the tap.
848
00:52:23,474 --> 00:52:26,726
I must tell you
that it's been an enormous help...
849
00:52:36,946 --> 00:52:39,030
Mr. Strang, is there...
850
00:52:39,573 --> 00:52:41,199
Something else?
851
00:52:41,408 --> 00:52:44,786
There is, actually. There's one...
There's one thing.
852
00:52:45,496 --> 00:52:47,330
That night that he...
853
00:52:47,498 --> 00:52:49,582
That he did it, that, uh,
854
00:52:50,084 --> 00:52:53,169
that awful thing in the... in the stables...
855
00:52:54,922 --> 00:52:57,423
That night, he was out with a girl.
856
00:52:58,300 --> 00:52:59,425
How do you know that?
857
00:52:59,510 --> 00:53:01,761
Well, I just know, that's all.
858
00:53:01,846 --> 00:53:03,137
Was that girl Jill Mason?
859
00:53:03,222 --> 00:53:04,848
I don't know her name.
860
00:53:04,932 --> 00:53:06,349
Excuse me, Mr. Strang, what do you know?
861
00:53:06,433 --> 00:53:08,059
- I can't say anymore.
- Mr. Strang...
862
00:53:08,143 --> 00:53:12,438
Ask him! Just ask him about taking
a girl out that very night. It's...
863
00:53:17,820 --> 00:53:19,571
Thanks for the tape.
It was excellent.
864
00:53:19,655 --> 00:53:21,906
Yeah, I'm not making anymore.
865
00:53:22,408 --> 00:53:24,325
One thing I didn't quite understand,
you began to say something
866
00:53:24,410 --> 00:53:27,787
about the horse on the beach talking to you.
867
00:53:27,872 --> 00:53:30,039
Tsk. Stupid, horses don't talk.
868
00:53:30,124 --> 00:53:31,583
So I believe.
869
00:53:32,626 --> 00:53:34,586
I don't know what you mean.
870
00:53:34,670 --> 00:53:37,171
Never mind about that.
Tell me something else.
871
00:53:37,256 --> 00:53:40,216
Who introduced you to the stable
to begin with?
872
00:53:40,301 --> 00:53:41,843
Someone I met.
873
00:53:42,720 --> 00:53:44,262
Where?
874
00:53:45,139 --> 00:53:48,391
Hello, can I do something for you?
875
00:53:49,310 --> 00:53:50,518
No.
876
00:53:50,603 --> 00:53:54,188
You're always staring in here,
aren't you?
877
00:53:54,273 --> 00:53:55,273
Me?
878
00:53:55,357 --> 00:53:58,067
Yes. Every day, at lunchtime.
879
00:53:58,319 --> 00:53:59,736
I've seen you.
880
00:53:59,820 --> 00:54:00,904
Not me.
881
00:54:01,322 --> 00:54:04,782
Course it's you.
You looking for a job, or something?
882
00:54:05,159 --> 00:54:08,494
Is there one? I can only do weekends.
883
00:54:08,579 --> 00:54:11,623
That's when most people ride.
We could use extra hands.
884
00:54:11,707 --> 00:54:12,916
It will mainly be mucking out.
885
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:14,334
Oh, I don't mind.
886
00:54:15,127 --> 00:54:16,210
Please.
887
00:54:16,295 --> 00:54:19,255
Come up on Saturday.
I'll introduce you to Mr. Dalton.
888
00:54:20,382 --> 00:54:21,841
And you went?
889
00:54:22,885 --> 00:54:24,177
Yeah.
890
00:55:47,928 --> 00:55:49,137
Hello!
891
00:55:50,806 --> 00:55:52,140
You came, then.
892
00:56:00,357 --> 00:56:04,402
Let's find Mr. Dalton.
My name's Jill, by the way. What's yours?
893
00:56:06,697 --> 00:56:08,114
All riders are accompanied, madam.
894
00:56:08,198 --> 00:56:10,992
No riders are allowed out on their own.
895
00:56:11,577 --> 00:56:14,954
All right, I'll put her down for 3:00.
What is the name, please?
896
00:56:15,956 --> 00:56:17,457
Mrs. Shawcross.
897
00:56:18,125 --> 00:56:19,876
Thank you. Goodbye.
898
00:56:21,128 --> 00:56:22,837
This is Alan Strang, Mr. Dalton.
899
00:56:22,921 --> 00:56:23,963
Oh?
900
00:56:25,132 --> 00:56:26,382
You ever worked in a stable before?
901
00:56:28,469 --> 00:56:31,012
- Can you ride?
- No, I don't want to.
902
00:56:31,805 --> 00:56:33,598
It's not extra, you know.
It comes with the job.
903
00:56:34,141 --> 00:56:36,350
No, I just want to work here.
904
00:56:36,435 --> 00:56:38,102
You like horses?
905
00:56:39,146 --> 00:56:41,314
Well, we can certainly use the help.
906
00:56:41,398 --> 00:56:43,858
There's enough work around here
for six lads.
907
00:56:43,942 --> 00:56:47,361
Four quid a day.
Saturdays and Sundays. All right?
908
00:56:47,446 --> 00:56:49,489
- Yes, sir.
- Good.
909
00:56:50,324 --> 00:56:53,701
Now, I expect the place neat, dry
and clean at all times.
910
00:56:54,328 --> 00:56:55,703
The main rule is,
911
00:56:55,788 --> 00:56:58,414
never pretend you know something
when you don't.
912
00:56:59,166 --> 00:57:02,085
Actually, the main rule is, enjoy yourself.
913
00:57:02,169 --> 00:57:04,212
Remember, 7:30 on the dot.
914
00:57:05,464 --> 00:57:08,674
Horses don't oversleep, you know.
See you later.
915
00:57:12,429 --> 00:57:15,473
This is Nugget. Come on, that's it. Yeah.
916
00:57:15,766 --> 00:57:18,226
Come on, come on.
917
00:57:18,977 --> 00:57:20,478
He's my favorite.
918
00:57:23,857 --> 00:57:25,233
This is a body brush.
919
00:57:26,193 --> 00:57:28,152
You use it with a currycomb.
920
00:57:28,237 --> 00:57:30,530
Now, you always groom the same way,
921
00:57:30,614 --> 00:57:32,698
from the ears, downwards.
922
00:57:33,450 --> 00:57:35,618
Don't be afraid to do it hard.
923
00:57:35,702 --> 00:57:38,955
The harder you do it,
the more the horse loves it.
924
00:57:40,207 --> 00:57:42,959
Push it right through the coat, like this.
925
00:57:43,043 --> 00:57:46,212
Work towards the tail,
and right through the coat.
926
00:57:46,922 --> 00:57:48,589
See how he loves it?
927
00:57:48,674 --> 00:57:51,551
Giving you a lovely massage, aren't I, boy?
928
00:57:53,011 --> 00:57:54,637
Here, you try.
929
00:58:05,274 --> 00:58:06,774
Nice and easy.
930
00:58:06,859 --> 00:58:08,359
Never rush.
931
00:58:09,778 --> 00:58:13,072
Work towards the tail,
and right through the coat.
932
00:58:13,574 --> 00:58:14,907
That's it.
933
00:58:15,742 --> 00:58:17,243
Again.
934
00:58:20,914 --> 00:58:22,832
You've got a feel for it, I can tell.
935
00:58:22,916 --> 00:58:24,667
It's going to be fun teaching you.
936
00:58:24,751 --> 00:58:26,544
Jill! Jill!
937
00:58:26,628 --> 00:58:27,753
What?
938
00:58:27,838 --> 00:58:29,755
Mr. Dalton wants you, please. Right away.
939
00:58:29,840 --> 00:58:32,175
Keep that up for 15 minutes.
Then do old trooper.
940
00:58:32,259 --> 00:58:33,426
See you later.
941
01:01:01,074 --> 01:01:04,035
All right, I'm off now.
I'll be back after lunch.
942
01:01:04,161 --> 01:01:06,454
If anyone rings, just put it in the book.
943
01:01:06,538 --> 01:01:09,290
Two rides this afternoon. That's the lot.
944
01:01:14,046 --> 01:01:16,714
Was it good? Touching them?
945
01:01:18,091 --> 01:01:20,885
Must've been marvelous,
being near them at last,
946
01:01:21,553 --> 01:01:24,597
making them fresh and glossy.
947
01:01:26,683 --> 01:01:27,725
Tell me,
948
01:01:28,852 --> 01:01:31,145
you worked at the stable every weekend?
949
01:01:31,438 --> 01:01:32,688
Yeah.
950
01:01:32,856 --> 01:01:35,483
You must have seen a lot of the girl.
951
01:01:35,567 --> 01:01:38,110
Tell me about her. Did you like her?
952
01:01:39,488 --> 01:01:42,406
- Come on, Alan, tell me.
- All right.
953
01:01:42,616 --> 01:01:44,075
Was she friendly?
954
01:01:44,451 --> 01:01:45,659
Yes.
955
01:01:45,744 --> 01:01:46,744
Or standoffish?
956
01:01:46,828 --> 01:01:48,079
Yes.
957
01:01:48,163 --> 01:01:49,288
Well, which?
958
01:01:49,915 --> 01:01:50,956
What?
959
01:01:51,041 --> 01:01:52,166
Which was she?
960
01:01:55,295 --> 01:01:57,421
Tell me, did you, uh...
961
01:01:57,506 --> 01:01:59,548
Did you ever take her out?
962
01:02:00,300 --> 01:02:02,843
- Did you have dates with her?
- What?
963
01:02:02,928 --> 01:02:03,928
Tell me if you did.
964
01:02:04,054 --> 01:02:05,388
"Tell me!"
965
01:02:05,472 --> 01:02:09,392
"Tell me, tell me, tell me" on and on.
Standing there, nosy parker.
966
01:02:09,476 --> 01:02:12,228
That's all you are, a bloody nosy parker,
just like my dad.
967
01:02:12,312 --> 01:02:14,355
"Answer this, answer that," never stop.
968
01:02:14,439 --> 01:02:15,564
- Well, I'm sorry.
- All right.
969
01:02:15,649 --> 01:02:18,526
Well, now it's my turn.
You tell me, answer me.
970
01:02:19,361 --> 01:02:20,403
We're not playing that game now.
971
01:02:20,487 --> 01:02:22,279
We're playing what I say.
972
01:02:23,490 --> 01:02:24,907
All right.
973
01:02:25,617 --> 01:02:26,659
What do you want to know?
974
01:02:27,160 --> 01:02:28,536
Do you have dates?
975
01:02:28,745 --> 01:02:29,954
I told you, I'm married.
976
01:02:30,038 --> 01:02:32,123
I know. Her name's Margaret,
she's a dentist.
977
01:02:32,207 --> 01:02:33,541
You see? I found out.
978
01:02:34,418 --> 01:02:36,085
What made you go with her, then?
979
01:02:36,169 --> 01:02:38,712
Did you used to bite her hands
when she did you in the chair?
980
01:02:39,089 --> 01:02:40,172
That's not very funny.
981
01:02:40,257 --> 01:02:41,757
Do you have girls behind her back?
982
01:02:41,842 --> 01:02:42,842
No.
983
01:02:42,968 --> 01:02:44,677
Then what? Do you fuck her?
984
01:02:44,761 --> 01:02:46,804
All right.
985
01:02:46,888 --> 01:02:48,806
Come on, tell me, tell me, tell me.
986
01:02:48,974 --> 01:02:50,224
- That's enough now.
- I'll bet you don't.
987
01:02:50,308 --> 01:02:53,436
I bet you never touch her.
You've got no kids, have you?
988
01:02:53,520 --> 01:02:55,312
Is that because you don't fuck?
989
01:02:56,022 --> 01:02:57,815
Go to your room.
990
01:02:57,941 --> 01:02:59,024
Quick march.
991
01:03:20,505 --> 01:03:22,506
Alan.
992
01:03:24,259 --> 01:03:25,801
Give me those cigarettes.
993
01:03:29,306 --> 01:03:30,890
Give them to me!
994
01:03:42,819 --> 01:03:44,028
Now go.
995
01:03:55,999 --> 01:03:57,625
Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
996
01:03:57,709 --> 01:04:00,127
The boy's on the run, so he turns defensive.
What am I, then?
997
01:04:00,212 --> 01:04:04,006
Wicked little bastard.
He knew exactly what questions to try.
998
01:04:05,008 --> 01:04:06,509
Not that there's anything novel about that.
999
01:04:06,593 --> 01:04:08,636
Advanced neurotics can
be dazzling at that game.
1000
01:04:08,720 --> 01:04:12,473
They aim unswervingly
at your area of maximum vulnerability,
1001
01:04:14,643 --> 01:04:17,520
which is, I suppose, as good a way
as any of describing Margaret.
1002
01:04:17,604 --> 01:04:19,146
Now, stop it.
1003
01:04:19,231 --> 01:04:20,523
Do I embarrass you?
1004
01:04:20,607 --> 01:04:22,316
I suspect you're about to.
1005
01:04:22,400 --> 01:04:24,193
My wife doesn't understand me,
your honor.
1006
01:04:24,277 --> 01:04:26,195
Do you understand her?
1007
01:04:27,697 --> 01:04:28,739
No.
1008
01:04:29,658 --> 01:04:31,617
Obviously, I never did.
1009
01:04:32,536 --> 01:04:33,786
I'm sorry.
1010
01:04:35,580 --> 01:04:37,581
I never like to ask.
1011
01:04:37,666 --> 01:04:39,542
But I always imagined you weren't
1012
01:04:39,626 --> 01:04:41,085
exactly compatible.
1013
01:04:41,169 --> 01:04:43,546
We were.
It actually worked for a bit.
1014
01:04:43,964 --> 01:04:45,339
I mean, for both of us.
1015
01:04:45,423 --> 01:04:47,675
She, for me, through a kind of...
1016
01:04:47,842 --> 01:04:49,093
Briskness,
1017
01:04:49,177 --> 01:04:52,054
a clear, redheaded, inaccessible briskness,
1018
01:04:52,138 --> 01:04:54,682
that kept me keyed up for months.
1019
01:04:54,766 --> 01:04:57,434
Mind you, if you're kinky
for northern hygiene, which I am,
1020
01:04:57,519 --> 01:04:59,019
you can hardly find
anything more compelling
1021
01:04:59,104 --> 01:05:00,229
than a Scottish lady dentist.
1022
01:05:00,313 --> 01:05:03,315
It's you who are
wicked, you know.
1023
01:05:03,400 --> 01:05:04,567
Not at all.
1024
01:05:04,651 --> 01:05:08,237
She got exactly the same from me.
Antiseptic proficiency.
1025
01:05:09,322 --> 01:05:11,156
I was like that in those days.
1026
01:05:11,324 --> 01:05:13,742
I see us in our wedding photograph,
1027
01:05:13,827 --> 01:05:16,078
Dr. And Dr. Macbrisk.
1028
01:05:16,871 --> 01:05:18,080
We were brisk in our wooing,
1029
01:05:18,164 --> 01:05:20,207
brisk in our wedding,
brisk in our disappointment.
1030
01:05:20,292 --> 01:05:23,836
We turned from each other briskly
into our separate surgeries,
1031
01:05:23,920 --> 01:05:25,588
and now, there's a nice,
1032
01:05:25,672 --> 01:05:27,172
brisk nothing.
1033
01:05:28,133 --> 01:05:30,342
You never had children, did you?
1034
01:05:33,763 --> 01:05:34,972
No.
1035
01:05:36,057 --> 01:05:38,017
We did not go in for them.
1036
01:05:41,021 --> 01:05:43,772
Instead she sits and knits things for orphans
in some home she works with,
1037
01:05:43,857 --> 01:05:47,985
and I sit opposite turning over the pages
of books on mythical Greece.
1038
01:05:48,069 --> 01:05:50,529
Mentally, we're in different parts
of the world.
1039
01:05:50,614 --> 01:05:53,240
She's forever in some drizzly chapel
of her own inheriting,
1040
01:05:53,325 --> 01:05:55,367
and I'm in some doric temple,
1041
01:05:55,452 --> 01:05:56,910
clouds tearing through the pillars,
1042
01:05:56,995 --> 01:05:58,954
eagles bearing prophesies out of the sky.
1043
01:05:59,039 --> 01:06:00,873
She finds all that repulsive.
1044
01:06:00,999 --> 01:06:03,792
All that my wife has ever taken
from the Mediterranean,
1045
01:06:03,877 --> 01:06:06,962
from that whole, vast, intuitive culture,
1046
01:06:07,797 --> 01:06:09,923
are four bottles of Chianti
to make into lamps,
1047
01:06:10,008 --> 01:06:13,552
and two China condiment donkeys
labeled Sally and Pepe.
1048
01:06:14,638 --> 01:06:16,180
Now you're being cruel.
1049
01:06:27,567 --> 01:06:28,901
I wish...
1050
01:06:29,486 --> 01:06:32,363
There was somebody in this life
I could show.
1051
01:06:32,447 --> 01:06:33,906
One...
1052
01:06:34,074 --> 01:06:37,534
Instinctive, absolutely unbrisk person
that I could take to Greece,
1053
01:06:37,619 --> 01:06:41,789
and stand in front of certain shrines
and sacred streams and say,
1054
01:06:43,458 --> 01:06:44,833
"Look,
1055
01:06:44,918 --> 01:06:47,711
"life is only comprehensible through 1,000
1056
01:06:47,796 --> 01:06:49,380
"local Gods.
1057
01:06:50,173 --> 01:06:52,966
"Not just the old, dead Gods,
with names like Zeus,
1058
01:06:53,051 --> 01:06:56,011
"but living geniuses of place and person.
1059
01:06:56,930 --> 01:06:59,515
"Not just Greece, but modern England.
1060
01:06:59,599 --> 01:07:03,018
"Here, spirits of certain trees,
1061
01:07:03,103 --> 01:07:05,437
"of certain curves of brick wall,
1062
01:07:06,523 --> 01:07:08,524
"of certain fish-and-chip shops, if you like,
1063
01:07:08,608 --> 01:07:11,193
"and... and slate roofs, and
1064
01:07:11,277 --> 01:07:13,487
"frowns in people, slouches."
1065
01:07:14,656 --> 01:07:16,323
I'd say to them,
1066
01:07:17,117 --> 01:07:18,367
"Worship...
1067
01:07:19,285 --> 01:07:21,120
"All you can see...
1068
01:07:22,706 --> 01:07:24,623
"And more will appear."
1069
01:07:29,587 --> 01:07:30,713
This boy,
1070
01:07:31,631 --> 01:07:33,132
with his stare,
1071
01:07:33,967 --> 01:07:35,634
he's trying to save himself through me.
1072
01:07:37,846 --> 01:07:38,887
I'd say so.
1073
01:07:43,226 --> 01:07:45,477
What am I trying to do to him?
1074
01:07:45,770 --> 01:07:47,896
- Restore him.
- To what?
1075
01:07:48,356 --> 01:07:49,690
A normal life.
1076
01:07:49,899 --> 01:07:51,150
Normal?
1077
01:07:51,401 --> 01:07:52,985
It still means something, you know.
1078
01:07:53,987 --> 01:07:56,405
You mean, a normal boy has one head.
1079
01:07:56,489 --> 01:07:58,073
A normal head has two ears.
1080
01:07:58,158 --> 01:07:59,658
- You know I don't...
- Then what do you mean?
1081
01:07:59,743 --> 01:08:00,909
Oh, stop it.
1082
01:08:02,704 --> 01:08:03,954
I want to know.
1083
01:08:06,499 --> 01:08:07,791
Look, my dear,
1084
01:08:07,876 --> 01:08:11,044
you know what I mean by
a normal smile in a child's eyes,
1085
01:08:11,129 --> 01:08:13,422
and one that isn't, don't you?
1086
01:08:14,382 --> 01:08:15,466
Yes.
1087
01:08:15,550 --> 01:08:18,469
Then we have a duty to that,
surely, both of us.
1088
01:08:20,180 --> 01:08:21,680
Touche.
1089
01:08:22,265 --> 01:08:23,348
I'll talk to you.
1090
01:08:23,850 --> 01:08:24,892
Martin.
1091
01:08:27,729 --> 01:08:30,606
You're going through a rotten patch
at the moment, I'm sorry.
1092
01:08:31,733 --> 01:08:34,568
I suppose one of the few things one can do
1093
01:08:34,652 --> 01:08:36,987
is simply hold on to priorities.
1094
01:08:37,322 --> 01:08:38,739
Such as?
1095
01:08:40,825 --> 01:08:42,618
Children before adults.
1096
01:08:43,578 --> 01:08:45,037
Things like that.
1097
01:08:47,707 --> 01:08:50,667
You're really quite splendid, you know that?
1098
01:08:50,752 --> 01:08:52,336
Famous for it.
1099
01:08:57,717 --> 01:08:59,134
All right.
1100
01:08:59,594 --> 01:09:03,138
The normal is the good smile
in a child's eyes.
1101
01:09:06,142 --> 01:09:09,520
It's also the dead stare in a million adults.
1102
01:09:11,147 --> 01:09:13,106
Both sustains and kills,
1103
01:09:14,025 --> 01:09:15,400
like a God.
1104
01:09:16,361 --> 01:09:20,072
It is the ordinary made beautiful.
It is also the average,
1105
01:09:20,156 --> 01:09:21,615
made lethal.
1106
01:09:23,910 --> 01:09:26,662
The normal is the indispensable,
1107
01:09:26,746 --> 01:09:28,872
murderous God of health.
1108
01:09:30,291 --> 01:09:33,252
And I am his priest.
1109
01:09:37,966 --> 01:09:40,676
I'm sorry about our row yesterday.
1110
01:09:41,302 --> 01:09:43,095
Yeah, it was stupid.
1111
01:09:43,763 --> 01:09:44,805
Yes.
1112
01:09:46,933 --> 01:09:48,225
Yes, it was.
1113
01:09:56,484 --> 01:09:58,777
Would you like to play a game?
1114
01:10:00,446 --> 01:10:01,780
What kind?
1115
01:10:02,615 --> 01:10:06,118
It's one I invented myself. It's called blink.
1116
01:10:06,202 --> 01:10:08,537
You fix your eyes on something,
1117
01:10:08,621 --> 01:10:10,831
say, that little stain on the wall over there,
1118
01:10:10,915 --> 01:10:13,375
and I tap my pencil on the desk.
1119
01:10:14,168 --> 01:10:17,796
First tap, you close your eyes.
The second, you open.
1120
01:10:18,381 --> 01:10:21,466
Close, open, close, open, till I say "stop."
1121
01:10:23,177 --> 01:10:24,887
What's the point of that?
1122
01:10:24,971 --> 01:10:28,265
Well, relax you.
Make it easier for you to talk.
1123
01:10:29,475 --> 01:10:31,059
Stupid.
1124
01:10:31,144 --> 01:10:33,312
Well, you don't have to if you don't want to.
1125
01:10:33,396 --> 01:10:35,731
I didn't say I didn't want to.
1126
01:10:35,815 --> 01:10:36,940
Well?
1127
01:10:38,192 --> 01:10:39,401
I don't mind.
1128
01:10:40,862 --> 01:10:42,237
All right.
1129
01:10:44,365 --> 01:10:46,658
Start watching that stain.
1130
01:10:46,826 --> 01:10:50,454
Now, put your hands by your side,
your fingers open wide.
1131
01:10:50,997 --> 01:10:52,956
The thing to do is to...
1132
01:10:53,041 --> 01:10:54,833
Feel comfortable and relax,
1133
01:10:54,918 --> 01:10:56,376
absolutely.
1134
01:10:56,669 --> 01:10:58,462
You watching that stain?
1135
01:10:58,546 --> 01:10:59,630
Yeah.
1136
01:10:59,756 --> 01:11:00,839
Right.
1137
01:11:02,759 --> 01:11:05,761
Now try and make your mind
as blank as possible.
1138
01:11:05,845 --> 01:11:06,929
That's not difficult.
1139
01:11:09,265 --> 01:11:10,849
No more talking.
1140
01:11:12,393 --> 01:11:14,686
First tap... close.
1141
01:11:14,771 --> 01:11:16,897
Second, open. Ready?
1142
01:11:32,038 --> 01:11:34,122
My tools are very delicate.
1143
01:11:35,708 --> 01:11:37,709
My compassion is honest.
1144
01:11:43,216 --> 01:11:46,718
I've honestly assisted children in this room.
1145
01:11:48,012 --> 01:11:51,223
I've talked away terrors,
relieved many agonies.
1146
01:11:53,518 --> 01:11:55,227
But beyond question,
1147
01:11:56,104 --> 01:11:59,231
I have cut from them
portions of individuality,
1148
01:11:59,315 --> 01:12:01,984
repugnant to this God, normal,
1149
01:12:02,068 --> 01:12:03,777
in all its aspects.
1150
01:12:06,197 --> 01:12:08,281
And at what length.
1151
01:12:08,658 --> 01:12:12,244
Sacrifices to Zeus took, at the most,
60 seconds each.
1152
01:12:14,247 --> 01:12:16,415
Sacrifices to the normal...
1153
01:12:17,250 --> 01:12:19,126
Can take as much as
1154
01:12:20,003 --> 01:12:21,420
60 months.
1155
01:12:34,767 --> 01:12:36,727
Can you hear me?
1156
01:12:39,188 --> 01:12:41,106
Can you speak normally?
1157
01:12:41,482 --> 01:12:43,400
Say "yes" if you can.
1158
01:12:43,776 --> 01:12:44,943
Yes.
1159
01:12:46,070 --> 01:12:47,320
Good.
1160
01:12:48,448 --> 01:12:50,198
Now raise your head.
1161
01:12:50,283 --> 01:12:51,783
Open your eyes.
1162
01:12:56,372 --> 01:12:57,748
Now, Alan,
1163
01:12:58,791 --> 01:13:02,127
when you wake up, you're going
to remember everything you've told me.
1164
01:13:02,211 --> 01:13:03,420
Understand?
1165
01:13:03,504 --> 01:13:04,588
Yes.
1166
01:13:05,048 --> 01:13:07,966
Now, I want you to think back in time.
1167
01:13:08,051 --> 01:13:09,968
You're on that beach you told me about.
1168
01:13:10,344 --> 01:13:11,970
You're six.
1169
01:13:12,138 --> 01:13:16,141
Above you, staring down at you,
is that great horse's head.
1170
01:13:16,851 --> 01:13:18,393
Can you see that?
1171
01:13:18,478 --> 01:13:19,811
Yes.
1172
01:13:20,730 --> 01:13:22,773
You ask him a question.
1173
01:13:24,067 --> 01:13:26,109
"Does the chain hurt?"
1174
01:13:26,194 --> 01:13:27,277
Yes.
1175
01:13:28,446 --> 01:13:30,155
Do you ask him aloud?
1176
01:13:30,573 --> 01:13:31,615
No.
1177
01:13:33,785 --> 01:13:36,119
And what does the horse say back?
1178
01:13:37,663 --> 01:13:38,872
"Yes."
1179
01:13:39,624 --> 01:13:41,208
What do you say?
1180
01:13:41,542 --> 01:13:43,210
"I'll take it out for you."
1181
01:13:43,294 --> 01:13:44,836
And he says?
1182
01:13:45,338 --> 01:13:47,672
"It never comes out.
They have me in chains."
1183
01:13:48,216 --> 01:13:49,466
Like Jesus?
1184
01:13:49,717 --> 01:13:50,842
Yes.
1185
01:13:50,927 --> 01:13:53,261
Only, his name is not Jesus, is it?
1186
01:13:53,346 --> 01:13:54,387
No.
1187
01:13:55,389 --> 01:13:56,515
What is it?
1188
01:13:58,643 --> 01:14:00,685
It's Equus.
1189
01:14:00,812 --> 01:14:02,145
Equus.
1190
01:14:03,689 --> 01:14:06,525
Does he live in all horses, or just some?
1191
01:14:06,609 --> 01:14:07,776
All.
1192
01:14:09,362 --> 01:14:10,570
Good.
1193
01:14:11,405 --> 01:14:13,115
Now you leave the beach.
1194
01:14:13,199 --> 01:14:15,450
You're in your bedroom at home.
1195
01:14:15,535 --> 01:14:17,327
You're 12 years old.
1196
01:14:17,870 --> 01:14:20,997
You're looking at Equus from
the foot of the bed.
1197
01:14:22,333 --> 01:14:24,626
Would you like to kneel down?
1198
01:14:25,253 --> 01:14:26,294
Yes.
1199
01:14:26,379 --> 01:14:27,629
Go on.
1200
01:14:33,177 --> 01:14:34,636
Now tell me,
1201
01:14:34,720 --> 01:14:36,721
why is Equus in chains?
1202
01:14:38,558 --> 01:14:40,225
For the sins of the world.
1203
01:14:40,309 --> 01:14:41,560
What does he say to you?
1204
01:14:41,644 --> 01:14:43,520
"I see you.
1205
01:14:43,604 --> 01:14:45,021
- "I will save you."
- How?
1206
01:14:45,106 --> 01:14:47,524
"Bear you away, two shall be one."
1207
01:14:47,608 --> 01:14:50,443
Horse and rider should be one beast?
1208
01:14:50,528 --> 01:14:52,237
- "One person."
- And?
1209
01:14:52,321 --> 01:14:55,699
"And my chinkle-chankle
shall be in thy hand."
1210
01:14:55,783 --> 01:14:58,535
"Chinkle-chankle," that's his mouth chain?
1211
01:14:58,911 --> 01:15:00,162
Yes.
1212
01:15:01,706 --> 01:15:03,248
All right.
1213
01:15:03,332 --> 01:15:05,083
You can get up now.
1214
01:15:13,134 --> 01:15:14,259
Now tell me,
1215
01:15:15,344 --> 01:15:16,928
what is the stable?
1216
01:15:17,805 --> 01:15:20,765
His temple? His holy of holies?
1217
01:15:21,601 --> 01:15:22,642
Yes.
1218
01:15:23,060 --> 01:15:25,395
Will you wash him, and tend him,
1219
01:15:26,063 --> 01:15:28,356
and brush him with many brushes?
1220
01:15:28,441 --> 01:15:29,482
Yes.
1221
01:15:30,151 --> 01:15:33,028
And there he spoke to you, didn't he?
1222
01:15:34,113 --> 01:15:36,698
He looked at you with his gentle eyes
1223
01:15:36,782 --> 01:15:38,658
and he spoke unto you.
1224
01:15:39,327 --> 01:15:40,368
Yes.
1225
01:15:40,453 --> 01:15:42,621
What did he say? "Ride me?
1226
01:15:43,539 --> 01:15:45,332
"Mount me, and ride me forth at night"?
1227
01:15:45,416 --> 01:15:46,583
Yes.
1228
01:15:46,667 --> 01:15:48,627
- And you obeyed?
- Yes.
1229
01:15:49,921 --> 01:15:52,339
How did you learn? By watching others?
1230
01:15:53,799 --> 01:15:54,966
Yes.
1231
01:15:55,051 --> 01:15:57,469
Must've been difficult. You bounced about?
1232
01:15:57,553 --> 01:15:58,929
Yes.
1233
01:15:59,013 --> 01:16:01,723
But he taught you, didn't he?
Equus showed you the way.
1234
01:16:01,807 --> 01:16:02,807
No.
1235
01:16:02,892 --> 01:16:04,309
- He didn't?
- He showed me nothing.
1236
01:16:04,393 --> 01:16:07,520
He's a mean bugger.
Ride or fall, that's straw law.
1237
01:16:07,605 --> 01:16:08,605
Straw law?
1238
01:16:08,689 --> 01:16:12,651
he was born in the straw
and this is his law
1239
01:16:13,486 --> 01:16:15,487
But... But you managed? You mastered him?
1240
01:16:15,571 --> 01:16:16,780
Had to.
1241
01:16:18,241 --> 01:16:20,325
And so you rode forth in secret?
1242
01:16:21,035 --> 01:16:23,119
- Yes.
- How often?
1243
01:16:23,496 --> 01:16:26,248
Every three weeks.
More, people would notice.
1244
01:16:26,332 --> 01:16:28,166
On a particular horse?
1245
01:16:29,043 --> 01:16:30,085
No.
1246
01:16:34,173 --> 01:16:35,423
Let's do it.
1247
01:16:36,425 --> 01:16:37,676
Let's go riding.
1248
01:16:38,219 --> 01:16:39,302
Now.
1249
01:16:40,513 --> 01:16:42,305
You're there now,
1250
01:16:42,431 --> 01:16:44,140
in front of the stable door.
1251
01:16:45,226 --> 01:16:46,726
Go on, open it.
1252
01:17:07,039 --> 01:17:08,581
Now go in.
1253
01:17:08,708 --> 01:17:12,377
Shh! Quietly now.
Dalton may still be awake.
1254
01:17:12,586 --> 01:17:14,379
Quietly as possible.
1255
01:17:14,588 --> 01:17:16,214
That's a good boy.
1256
01:17:17,425 --> 01:17:19,050
Are you in yet?
1257
01:17:19,885 --> 01:17:20,969
Yes.
1258
01:17:21,220 --> 01:17:23,722
Can you see all the horses?
1259
01:17:23,931 --> 01:17:25,056
Yes.
1260
01:17:25,433 --> 01:17:27,726
Which one are you going to take?
1261
01:17:31,397 --> 01:17:32,439
Nugget.
1262
01:17:34,859 --> 01:17:37,277
What do you do, first thing?
1263
01:17:38,070 --> 01:17:39,988
Put on his sandals.
1264
01:17:40,072 --> 01:17:42,198
The sandals of majesty.
1265
01:17:43,701 --> 01:17:45,076
Made of sack.
1266
01:17:47,496 --> 01:17:48,788
And then?
1267
01:17:50,291 --> 01:17:51,916
Chinkle-chankle.
1268
01:17:53,336 --> 01:17:55,378
He doesn't like it so late.
1269
01:17:56,297 --> 01:17:58,965
But he takes it for my sake.
1270
01:17:59,467 --> 01:18:00,967
He bends for me,
1271
01:18:01,093 --> 01:18:03,428
stretches forth his neck unto it.
1272
01:18:05,431 --> 01:18:06,765
And then?
1273
01:18:07,850 --> 01:18:09,392
Buckle,
1274
01:18:10,269 --> 01:18:11,895
and lead out.
1275
01:18:12,521 --> 01:18:13,897
No saddle?
1276
01:18:16,192 --> 01:18:17,442
Never.
1277
01:18:20,571 --> 01:18:22,113
Where are you now?
1278
01:18:25,159 --> 01:18:26,534
The path.
1279
01:18:28,621 --> 01:18:29,954
He's quiet.
1280
01:18:32,875 --> 01:18:34,334
Always is, this bit.
1281
01:18:36,128 --> 01:18:37,837
Meek and mild legs.
1282
01:18:39,548 --> 01:18:41,716
Gentle Equus, meek and mild.
1283
01:18:42,718 --> 01:18:44,511
At least, till the field.
1284
01:18:44,678 --> 01:18:46,429
- What field?
- Ha-ha.
1285
01:18:46,514 --> 01:18:47,555
What?
1286
01:18:47,640 --> 01:18:49,516
The field of ha-ha then there's trouble.
1287
01:18:49,600 --> 01:18:51,226
- What kind?
- He won't go in.
1288
01:18:51,977 --> 01:18:53,269
Make him go into it.
1289
01:18:53,354 --> 01:18:54,562
Come on.
1290
01:18:54,647 --> 01:18:56,523
Come on.
1291
01:19:00,111 --> 01:19:02,278
Is it a good field?
1292
01:19:04,031 --> 01:19:05,698
It's perfect.
1293
01:19:10,162 --> 01:19:11,996
Full of rubbish,
1294
01:19:14,500 --> 01:19:16,292
electrical and kitchenware.
1295
01:19:24,427 --> 01:19:26,386
It's covered with nettles.
1296
01:19:31,016 --> 01:19:32,517
Burn your feet.
1297
01:19:34,812 --> 01:19:37,021
Take your shoes off?
1298
01:19:39,567 --> 01:19:41,151
Everything.
1299
01:19:42,528 --> 01:19:44,195
All your clothes?
1300
01:19:48,284 --> 01:19:49,659
Yes.
1301
01:20:28,532 --> 01:20:30,158
What do you do now?
1302
01:20:30,618 --> 01:20:32,368
Hide the clothes.
1303
01:20:32,578 --> 01:20:34,162
Get the man-bit.
1304
01:20:34,246 --> 01:20:35,747
Man-bit?
1305
01:20:35,831 --> 01:20:37,499
Stick for my mouth.
1306
01:20:37,750 --> 01:20:39,667
- Your mouth?
- To bite on.
1307
01:20:40,419 --> 01:20:41,961
Why? What for?
1308
01:20:42,087 --> 01:20:44,422
So as it won't happen too quick.
1309
01:20:47,718 --> 01:20:49,928
Is it always the same stick?
1310
01:20:50,763 --> 01:20:52,138
Of course.
1311
01:20:53,682 --> 01:20:55,350
Sacred stick.
1312
01:20:58,020 --> 01:20:59,604
Keep it in the hole.
1313
01:21:03,526 --> 01:21:05,443
The ark of the man-bit.
1314
01:21:29,802 --> 01:21:31,052
And now?
1315
01:21:33,764 --> 01:21:35,723
What do you do now?
1316
01:21:38,561 --> 01:21:39,894
Touch him.
1317
01:21:39,979 --> 01:21:41,145
Where?
1318
01:21:41,730 --> 01:21:43,064
All over,
1319
01:21:45,609 --> 01:21:46,776
belly,
1320
01:21:48,529 --> 01:21:49,862
ribs.
1321
01:21:52,866 --> 01:21:54,367
His ribs are of ivory,
1322
01:21:56,787 --> 01:21:57,954
of great value.
1323
01:22:00,666 --> 01:22:02,333
His flank is cool.
1324
01:22:04,378 --> 01:22:06,379
His nostrils open for me.
1325
01:22:07,673 --> 01:22:09,257
His eyes shine! They can see!
1326
01:22:09,550 --> 01:22:10,758
His eyes!
1327
01:22:13,887 --> 01:22:14,887
Go on.
1328
01:22:16,056 --> 01:22:17,348
What then?
1329
01:22:18,017 --> 01:22:19,017
Sugar.
1330
01:22:19,143 --> 01:22:21,144
- Lump sugar?
- His last supper.
1331
01:22:21,979 --> 01:22:24,022
- Last before what?
- Ha-ha.
1332
01:22:27,818 --> 01:22:30,028
You say anything when you give it to him?
1333
01:22:30,112 --> 01:22:32,196
Take my sins.
1334
01:22:32,323 --> 01:22:34,240
Eat them, for my sake.
1335
01:22:44,918 --> 01:22:46,127
Now he's ready?
1336
01:22:46,962 --> 01:22:48,379
You can get up on him now?
1337
01:22:48,464 --> 01:22:49,672
Yes.
1338
01:22:49,757 --> 01:22:51,466
Go on then, Alan.
1339
01:22:51,592 --> 01:22:52,967
Mount him.
1340
01:22:56,555 --> 01:22:59,390
Into my hands, he commends himself...
1341
01:23:00,267 --> 01:23:02,727
Naked in his chinkle-chankle.
1342
01:23:05,147 --> 01:23:11,402
Equus.
1343
01:23:15,074 --> 01:23:16,532
Take me.
1344
01:23:22,247 --> 01:23:23,331
Whoa.
1345
01:23:23,415 --> 01:23:25,041
Whoa, down.
1346
01:23:25,125 --> 01:23:27,168
Whoa, down, easy, boy, easy, boy.
1347
01:23:27,252 --> 01:23:28,670
Easy, boy.
1348
01:23:28,754 --> 01:23:30,004
Equus, the godslave.
1349
01:23:30,089 --> 01:23:32,131
Faithful and true, that's it.
1350
01:23:32,216 --> 01:23:34,092
He's good. He's good.
1351
01:23:34,176 --> 01:23:35,343
He's good.
1352
01:23:35,427 --> 01:23:37,845
Equus, son of Fleckwus.
1353
01:23:38,430 --> 01:23:39,972
Son of Neckwus.
1354
01:23:40,766 --> 01:23:41,891
Walk.
1355
01:23:45,854 --> 01:23:48,856
Here we go.
1356
01:23:48,941 --> 01:23:52,193
The king rides out on Equus,
mightiest of horses.
1357
01:23:53,570 --> 01:23:55,321
Only I can ride him.
1358
01:23:55,864 --> 01:23:58,449
His neck comes out of my body.
1359
01:23:58,659 --> 01:24:00,702
It lifts in the dark.
1360
01:24:00,786 --> 01:24:03,204
Equus, godslave.
1361
01:24:03,288 --> 01:24:04,747
Now the king commands you.
1362
01:24:04,832 --> 01:24:07,291
Tonight, we ride against them all,
1363
01:24:07,668 --> 01:24:09,127
the hosts of bowler,
1364
01:24:09,962 --> 01:24:11,921
the hosts of Jodhpur,
1365
01:24:12,005 --> 01:24:15,091
all those who show you off for their vanity,
1366
01:24:15,175 --> 01:24:18,344
tie rosettes on your head for their vanity.
1367
01:24:18,429 --> 01:24:20,555
Come on, Equus, let's get them.
1368
01:24:20,639 --> 01:24:23,808
Trot! Steady, steady! Steady, steady!
1369
01:24:23,892 --> 01:24:25,560
That's it, steady, steady.
1370
01:24:25,644 --> 01:24:27,979
Cowboys are watching,
taking off their Stetsons.
1371
01:24:28,063 --> 01:24:30,523
They know who we are.
They're admiring us.
1372
01:24:30,607 --> 01:24:33,735
Bowing low unto us.
Come on now, show them.
1373
01:24:33,819 --> 01:24:35,111
Canter! Canter!
1374
01:24:35,904 --> 01:24:37,905
And Equus the mighty rose against all.
1375
01:24:37,990 --> 01:24:40,616
His enemies scatter.
1376
01:24:40,701 --> 01:24:41,868
His enemies fall.
1377
01:24:41,952 --> 01:24:44,245
Turn! Trample them! Trample them!
1378
01:24:44,329 --> 01:24:45,621
Trample them! Turn.
1379
01:24:45,706 --> 01:24:48,583
Trample them! Trample them!
Trample them! Turn.
1380
01:24:48,667 --> 01:24:50,543
Turn! Turn! Turn!
1381
01:24:50,627 --> 01:24:52,962
Turn! Turn! Turn!
1382
01:24:54,673 --> 01:24:58,050
Stiff! Stiff in the wind.
My mane, stiff in the wind!
1383
01:24:58,135 --> 01:25:01,804
I'm raw, I'm raw. Do you feel my raw?
Feel me on you?
1384
01:25:01,889 --> 01:25:05,057
On you! On you! I want to be inside you.
1385
01:25:05,142 --> 01:25:09,228
I want to be inside you, and be you.
Forever one person.
1386
01:25:09,313 --> 01:25:11,647
I love you!
1387
01:25:11,732 --> 01:25:12,815
Bear me away.
1388
01:25:12,900 --> 01:25:15,985
Make us now one person.
1389
01:25:16,069 --> 01:25:19,071
Ahh! One person!
1390
01:25:45,974 --> 01:25:47,058
Amen.
1391
01:26:09,832 --> 01:26:13,167
Afterwards, he says,
they always embrace.
1392
01:26:14,962 --> 01:26:17,630
He showed me how he stands in the night,
1393
01:26:18,257 --> 01:26:20,591
like a frozen tango dancer,
1394
01:26:21,385 --> 01:26:23,135
inhaling the cold...
1395
01:26:23,887 --> 01:26:25,429
Sweet breath.
1396
01:26:27,641 --> 01:26:29,851
Have you noticed it about horses,
the way they'll stand,
1397
01:26:29,935 --> 01:26:33,688
one hoof on its end,
like those girls in the ballet?
1398
01:26:37,734 --> 01:26:39,026
And now,
1399
01:26:40,237 --> 01:26:41,737
he's gone off to rest,
1400
01:26:42,698 --> 01:26:44,240
leaving me alone,
1401
01:26:45,075 --> 01:26:46,492
with Equus.
1402
01:26:47,786 --> 01:26:50,162
I can hear the creature's voice.
1403
01:26:50,289 --> 01:26:53,666
He's calling me out
of the black cave of the psyche.
1404
01:26:54,126 --> 01:26:55,918
I shove in my dim little torch,
1405
01:26:56,461 --> 01:26:58,296
and there he stands,
1406
01:26:58,630 --> 01:26:59,797
waiting for me.
1407
01:27:02,342 --> 01:27:04,468
He raises his matted head.
1408
01:27:04,595 --> 01:27:07,138
He opens his great square teeth,
and he says,
1409
01:27:07,931 --> 01:27:10,391
"Why? Why me?
1410
01:27:10,475 --> 01:27:12,226
"Why, ultimately, me?
1411
01:27:12,311 --> 01:27:13,978
"Do you really imagine
you can account for me,
1412
01:27:14,062 --> 01:27:16,772
"totally, infallibly,
inevitably account for me?
1413
01:27:16,857 --> 01:27:18,733
"Poor Dr. Dysart."
1414
01:27:22,654 --> 01:27:25,865
Of course, I've stared at such images before,
1415
01:27:25,949 --> 01:27:28,910
or been stared at by them,
whichever way you look at it.
1416
01:27:28,994 --> 01:27:34,415
And weirdly, often now with me,
the feeling is that they are staring at us.
1417
01:27:35,208 --> 01:27:37,376
That in some quite palpable way,
1418
01:27:38,211 --> 01:27:39,795
they precede us.
1419
01:27:40,005 --> 01:27:42,590
Meaningless, but unsettling.
1420
01:27:44,343 --> 01:27:46,969
In either case, this particular one.
1421
01:27:47,054 --> 01:27:51,807
This huge, implacable head
is the most alarming yet.
1422
01:27:52,184 --> 01:27:56,020
It asks questions
I've avoided all my professional life.
1423
01:28:03,487 --> 01:28:06,280
A child is born into a world of phenomena,
1424
01:28:06,365 --> 01:28:07,990
all equal in their power to enslave.
1425
01:28:08,075 --> 01:28:10,076
It sniffs, it sucks, it strokes its eyes,
1426
01:28:10,160 --> 01:28:12,370
over the whole, uncountable range.
1427
01:28:12,537 --> 01:28:14,956
Suddenly, one strikes.
1428
01:28:15,040 --> 01:28:16,707
Then another. Then another.
1429
01:28:16,792 --> 01:28:17,959
Why?
1430
01:28:18,043 --> 01:28:21,545
Moments snap together,
like magnets forging a chain of shackles.
1431
01:28:21,630 --> 01:28:22,797
Why?
1432
01:28:22,881 --> 01:28:25,800
I can trace them. I can even,
with time, pull them apart again.
1433
01:28:25,926 --> 01:28:28,427
But why, at the start,
they were ever magnetized at all,
1434
01:28:28,512 --> 01:28:31,639
why those particular moments
of experience and no others,
1435
01:28:31,807 --> 01:28:34,809
I do not know, and nor does anybody else!
1436
01:28:38,230 --> 01:28:39,522
And if I don't know,
1437
01:28:40,399 --> 01:28:41,565
if I can never know,
1438
01:28:42,317 --> 01:28:43,526
what am I doing here?
1439
01:28:44,736 --> 01:28:48,823
I don't mean clinically doing,
or socially doing, but fundamentally.
1440
01:28:50,200 --> 01:28:53,953
These whys, these questions,
are fundamental.
1441
01:28:55,080 --> 01:28:58,040
Yet they have no place in a consulting room.
1442
01:28:58,375 --> 01:28:59,917
So, then, do I?
1443
01:29:00,544 --> 01:29:02,044
Do any of us?
1444
01:29:04,297 --> 01:29:07,258
This is the feeling, more and more.
1445
01:29:09,428 --> 01:29:10,886
Displacement.
1446
01:29:11,722 --> 01:29:13,180
Relentless...
1447
01:29:14,266 --> 01:29:15,808
Displacement.
1448
01:29:16,601 --> 01:29:18,728
"Account for me,"
1449
01:29:19,521 --> 01:29:21,272
says staring Equus.
1450
01:29:22,357 --> 01:29:25,151
"First, account for me!"
1451
01:29:28,363 --> 01:29:29,905
Dr. Dysart!
1452
01:29:29,990 --> 01:29:31,157
Dr. Dysart!
1453
01:29:31,241 --> 01:29:34,160
There's a terrible scene with
the Strang boy in the violence room.
1454
01:29:34,244 --> 01:29:38,122
His mother brought him chocolates.
He threw them at her, hard!
1455
01:29:38,832 --> 01:29:40,541
Don't you dare!
1456
01:29:41,460 --> 01:29:43,878
Don't you dare.
Don't you look at me like that.
1457
01:29:43,962 --> 01:29:45,880
I'm not a doctor, you know,
who'll take anything.
1458
01:29:45,964 --> 01:29:47,673
Don't you give me that stare, young man.
1459
01:29:47,758 --> 01:29:48,758
Mrs. Strang.
1460
01:29:48,842 --> 01:29:50,217
I know your stares, they don't work on me...
1461
01:29:50,302 --> 01:29:51,927
Leave here at once!
1462
01:29:52,637 --> 01:29:53,721
What did you say?
1463
01:29:53,805 --> 01:29:55,806
I tell you to leave here at once.
1464
01:29:58,226 --> 01:29:59,477
Goodbye, Alan.
1465
01:29:59,561 --> 01:30:00,811
Wait for me here.
1466
01:30:03,523 --> 01:30:04,940
I must ask you never to come here again.
1467
01:30:05,025 --> 01:30:07,777
You think I want to?
Do you think I want to?
1468
01:30:08,487 --> 01:30:09,570
Mrs. Strang,
1469
01:30:09,696 --> 01:30:10,863
what on earth has got into you?
1470
01:30:10,947 --> 01:30:12,156
Into me?
1471
01:30:12,240 --> 01:30:14,241
- Can't you see the boy's highly distressed?
- Oh, really?
1472
01:30:14,326 --> 01:30:15,951
Yes, he's at the most delicate stage
of treatment.
1473
01:30:16,036 --> 01:30:19,955
He's totally ex... ex... exposed,
ashamed, everything you can imagine.
1474
01:30:20,040 --> 01:30:21,082
And me?
1475
01:30:21,166 --> 01:30:22,500
What about me?
1476
01:30:23,168 --> 01:30:25,086
What do you think I am?
1477
01:30:26,338 --> 01:30:28,756
I'm a parent. Of course, that doesn't count.
1478
01:30:28,840 --> 01:30:30,800
That's a dirty word in here, isn't it?
"Parent"?
1479
01:30:30,884 --> 01:30:31,967
Now, you know that's not true.
1480
01:30:32,052 --> 01:30:33,844
Oh, I know it, I know it, all right.
1481
01:30:34,554 --> 01:30:36,430
I've heard it all my life.
1482
01:30:36,515 --> 01:30:39,433
I... it's our fault.
Whatever happens, we did it.
1483
01:30:39,976 --> 01:30:42,144
You come to us and say,
"Who forbids television?
1484
01:30:42,229 --> 01:30:43,771
"Who does what behind whose back?"
1485
01:30:43,855 --> 01:30:45,356
As if we're criminals.
1486
01:30:46,733 --> 01:30:49,610
Well, let me tell you something.
We're not criminals.
1487
01:30:49,694 --> 01:30:51,445
We've done nothing wrong.
1488
01:30:51,863 --> 01:30:55,116
We loved Alan.
We gave him the best love we could.
1489
01:30:56,368 --> 01:30:59,954
Poor Frank digs into the boy too much,
but... but nothing in excess.
1490
01:31:00,038 --> 01:31:01,705
He's not a bully.
1491
01:31:03,333 --> 01:31:04,708
No, Doctor.
1492
01:31:05,210 --> 01:31:06,836
Whatever has happened,
1493
01:31:07,838 --> 01:31:10,047
has happened because of Alan.
1494
01:31:10,882 --> 01:31:13,259
If you added up everything
we ever did to him,
1495
01:31:13,343 --> 01:31:14,969
from his first day on Earth to this,
1496
01:31:15,053 --> 01:31:18,722
you wouldn't find out why he did this,
t... terrible thing.
1497
01:31:21,351 --> 01:31:23,602
Do you understand what I'm saying?
1498
01:31:24,479 --> 01:31:25,896
I want you to understand,
1499
01:31:25,981 --> 01:31:29,775
because I lie awake,
and awake, thinking it out.
1500
01:31:30,694 --> 01:31:31,819
And I want you to know
1501
01:31:31,903 --> 01:31:35,030
that I deny it absolutely,
what he's doing now.
1502
01:31:35,282 --> 01:31:36,782
Staring at me,
1503
01:31:37,200 --> 01:31:40,077
attacking me for what he's done.
1504
01:31:40,620 --> 01:31:43,497
For what... he... is.
1505
01:31:47,169 --> 01:31:49,086
- Mrs. Strang!
- Oh!
1506
01:32:08,815 --> 01:32:11,775
You have your words, and I have mine.
1507
01:32:12,777 --> 01:32:16,739
But if you knew God, Doctor,
you would know about the devil.
1508
01:32:17,199 --> 01:32:21,118
The devil isn't made by what Mummy says,
or what Daddy says.
1509
01:32:21,203 --> 01:32:22,953
The devil is there.
1510
01:32:23,121 --> 01:32:26,290
It's an old-fashioned word, but a true thing.
1511
01:32:28,543 --> 01:32:29,793
I'll go.
1512
01:32:30,754 --> 01:32:33,297
What I did just now was inexcusable.
1513
01:32:34,216 --> 01:32:35,966
I only know that...
1514
01:32:36,092 --> 01:32:38,135
He was my little Alan,
1515
01:32:39,512 --> 01:32:41,472
and then the devil came.
1516
01:33:09,668 --> 01:33:12,002
I thought you liked your mother.
1517
01:33:16,549 --> 01:33:17,675
She doesn't know anything, you know.
1518
01:33:17,759 --> 01:33:19,593
I haven't told her what you told me.
You know that, don't you?
1519
01:33:19,678 --> 01:33:21,428
It was lies, anyway.
1520
01:33:21,638 --> 01:33:22,680
What was?
1521
01:33:22,806 --> 01:33:25,474
You and your pencil.
Just a con-trick, that's all.
1522
01:33:25,558 --> 01:33:27,518
Made me say a lot of lies.
1523
01:33:28,687 --> 01:33:29,728
Like what?
1524
01:33:29,813 --> 01:33:32,773
All of it. Everything I said. A lot of lies.
1525
01:33:33,775 --> 01:33:34,942
I see.
1526
01:33:36,236 --> 01:33:38,445
Ought to be locked up. Bloody tricks.
1527
01:33:38,530 --> 01:33:40,114
Thought you liked tricks.
1528
01:33:40,198 --> 01:33:42,241
It'll be the drug next, huh?
1529
01:33:44,452 --> 01:33:45,494
What drug?
1530
01:33:45,578 --> 01:33:47,788
I've heard. I'm not ignorant.
1531
01:33:48,707 --> 01:33:49,748
I know what you get up to in here,
1532
01:33:49,833 --> 01:33:53,294
shove needles in people and pump them
full of truth drugs, so they...
1533
01:33:53,378 --> 01:33:56,463
Can't help saying things.
That's next, isn't it?
1534
01:34:07,100 --> 01:34:08,225
Alan,
1535
01:34:09,394 --> 01:34:11,562
do you know why you're here?
1536
01:34:14,482 --> 01:34:16,900
So you can give me truth drugs.
1537
01:34:17,527 --> 01:34:18,694
He actually believes they exist.
1538
01:34:18,778 --> 01:34:19,820
Truth drugs?
1539
01:34:19,904 --> 01:34:21,030
Yes.
1540
01:34:21,114 --> 01:34:22,156
And don't they?
1541
01:34:22,240 --> 01:34:23,407
Of course not.
1542
01:34:24,117 --> 01:34:25,909
The important thing is that he...
1543
01:34:26,995 --> 01:34:28,287
Wants a way to speak,
1544
01:34:28,371 --> 01:34:30,831
to finally tell me
what happened in those stables.
1545
01:34:30,915 --> 01:34:32,166
Tape is too isolated,
1546
01:34:32,250 --> 01:34:35,586
and hypnosis, he pretends, is a trick,
so he can deny it later.
1547
01:34:37,255 --> 01:34:40,090
Now I'm tempted to play a real trick on him.
1548
01:34:40,175 --> 01:34:41,550
Like what?
1549
01:34:42,093 --> 01:34:43,761
Give him an aspirin.
1550
01:34:43,887 --> 01:34:46,638
Tell him it's the strongest truth drug
in the world.
1551
01:34:47,057 --> 01:34:49,558
He'd just deny everything again afterwards.
1552
01:34:50,101 --> 01:34:51,852
The same thing all over.
1553
01:34:52,020 --> 01:34:54,813
No, because I'd tell him
the truth afterwards,
1554
01:34:54,939 --> 01:34:56,774
that it was simply an aspirin.
1555
01:34:56,858 --> 01:34:58,400
And he'll believe me.
1556
01:34:59,444 --> 01:35:01,862
You know, underneath all that glowering,
the boy trusts me.
1557
01:35:01,946 --> 01:35:02,988
You realize that?
1558
01:35:03,073 --> 01:35:04,406
Oh, I'm sure he does.
1559
01:35:04,616 --> 01:35:05,866
Poor, bloody fool.
1560
01:35:05,950 --> 01:35:09,453
Oh, now, please, Martin, dear,
don't start that again.
1561
01:35:12,791 --> 01:35:14,541
Can you think of anything worse
one can do to somebody
1562
01:35:14,626 --> 01:35:16,960
than to take away their worship?
1563
01:35:18,004 --> 01:35:19,088
Worship?
1564
01:35:19,172 --> 01:35:20,631
Yes, that word again.
1565
01:35:21,758 --> 01:35:23,675
Isn't that a little extreme?
1566
01:35:24,135 --> 01:35:25,594
Extremity...
1567
01:35:25,804 --> 01:35:27,304
Is the point.
1568
01:35:28,390 --> 01:35:31,975
Worship isn't destructive, Martin.
I know that.
1569
01:35:32,852 --> 01:35:34,103
I don't.
1570
01:35:34,813 --> 01:35:37,064
I only know it's the core of his life.
1571
01:35:37,190 --> 01:35:40,734
What else has he got?
I mean, think about it. He can hardly read.
1572
01:35:40,819 --> 01:35:44,071
He knows no physics or engineering
to make the world real to him,
1573
01:35:44,155 --> 01:35:47,241
no paintings to show him
how others have enjoyed it,
1574
01:35:47,325 --> 01:35:49,451
no music except television jingles,
1575
01:35:49,536 --> 01:35:51,245
no history except tales
from a desperate mother.
1576
01:35:51,329 --> 01:35:53,664
No friends, not one kid to give him a joke,
1577
01:35:53,748 --> 01:35:56,250
or make him know
himself more moderately.
1578
01:35:56,334 --> 01:35:59,086
He's a modern citizen
for whom society doesn't exist.
1579
01:35:59,170 --> 01:36:03,006
He lives one hour every three weeks,
howling in a mist.
1580
01:36:03,591 --> 01:36:06,552
"With my body, I thee worship."
1581
01:36:07,971 --> 01:36:09,888
Many men are less vital with their wives.
1582
01:36:10,348 --> 01:36:13,350
All the same, they don't usually blind
their wives, do they?
1583
01:36:13,435 --> 01:36:15,185
- Oh, come on.
- Well, do they?
1584
01:36:15,520 --> 01:36:17,813
You mean he's a madman?
A violent, dangerous madman,
1585
01:36:17,897 --> 01:36:19,731
who'll go round the country,
doing it again and again?
1586
01:36:20,775 --> 01:36:22,943
I mean he's in pain, Martin.
1587
01:36:23,194 --> 01:36:25,779
He's been in pain for most of his life.
1588
01:36:26,364 --> 01:36:27,364
Yes.
1589
01:36:27,449 --> 01:36:28,949
And you can take it away.
1590
01:36:30,034 --> 01:36:30,993
Yes.
1591
01:36:31,077 --> 01:36:33,495
Then that's all you need to know, in the end.
1592
01:36:35,665 --> 01:36:36,957
No.
1593
01:36:37,834 --> 01:36:39,042
Why not?
1594
01:36:39,294 --> 01:36:41,545
Because it is his.
1595
01:36:42,422 --> 01:36:43,505
His?
1596
01:36:43,965 --> 01:36:45,215
His pain.
1597
01:36:46,551 --> 01:36:47,801
His own.
1598
01:36:48,887 --> 01:36:50,220
He made it.
1599
01:36:50,722 --> 01:36:52,431
I don't understand.
1600
01:36:54,893 --> 01:36:56,226
Well, I don't!
1601
01:36:57,187 --> 01:36:59,021
I mean, there's nothing meritorious
about being in pain,
1602
01:36:59,105 --> 01:37:00,731
that's just pure old masochism.
1603
01:37:00,857 --> 01:37:03,358
I'm talking about passion, Hesther.
1604
01:37:03,568 --> 01:37:06,236
Do you know what that word
meant originally? Suffering.
1605
01:37:06,321 --> 01:37:08,697
The way you get your own spirit
through your own suffering.
1606
01:37:09,449 --> 01:37:12,409
Self-chosen. Self-made.
This boy's done that.
1607
01:37:14,621 --> 01:37:18,207
He's created his own desperate ceremony
just, just to...
1608
01:37:18,291 --> 01:37:21,126
Just to ignite one flame of original ecstasy
1609
01:37:21,211 --> 01:37:23,629
in... in the spiritless waste around him.
1610
01:37:24,130 --> 01:37:25,464
All right,
1611
01:37:26,257 --> 01:37:28,675
he's destroyed for it, horribly.
1612
01:37:29,010 --> 01:37:31,136
He's virtually been destroyed by it.
1613
01:37:31,262 --> 01:37:33,847
But one thing I know for sure,
that boy has known a passion
1614
01:37:33,932 --> 01:37:36,683
more ferocious than I have known
in any second of my life.
1615
01:37:36,768 --> 01:37:38,852
Well, let me tell you something. I envy it.
1616
01:37:39,270 --> 01:37:41,271
- You can't.
- Don't you see?
1617
01:37:41,648 --> 01:37:43,815
That's what his stare
has been saying to me all this time.
1618
01:37:43,900 --> 01:37:46,318
"At least I galloped. When did you?"
1619
01:37:54,202 --> 01:37:55,994
I'm jealous, Hesther.
1620
01:37:57,497 --> 01:37:58,830
Jealous...
1621
01:37:59,791 --> 01:38:01,291
Of Alan Strang.
1622
01:38:02,835 --> 01:38:04,253
That's absurd.
1623
01:38:04,337 --> 01:38:05,546
Is it?
1624
01:38:05,630 --> 01:38:07,130
Yes, utterly.
1625
01:38:07,465 --> 01:38:08,715
Utterly!
1626
01:38:10,093 --> 01:38:11,969
I go on about my wife.
1627
01:38:12,554 --> 01:38:13,929
Have you thought about the husband?
1628
01:38:14,013 --> 01:38:17,558
The finicky, critical husband,
with his art books on mythical Greece?
1629
01:38:17,642 --> 01:38:19,184
What worship has he ever known?
Real worship?
1630
01:38:19,269 --> 01:38:21,353
Without worship, you... you shrink!
1631
01:38:21,437 --> 01:38:24,147
It's as brutal as that. I shrank my own life.
No one can do it for you.
1632
01:38:24,232 --> 01:38:27,568
I settled for being pallid and provincial
out of my own eternal timidity.
1633
01:38:27,652 --> 01:38:31,238
The old... the old story of bluster,
and do bugger-all.
1634
01:38:32,782 --> 01:38:34,992
I didn't even dare to have children...
1635
01:38:35,076 --> 01:38:39,496
Didn't dare to bring children into a house
and marriage as cold as mine.
1636
01:38:41,416 --> 01:38:44,793
I tell everyone Margaret's the Puritan,
I'm the pagan.
1637
01:38:44,877 --> 01:38:49,047
Some pagan. Such wild returns
I make to the womb of civilization.
1638
01:38:49,507 --> 01:38:51,258
Three weeks a year in the Mediterranean.
1639
01:38:51,342 --> 01:38:54,511
Every bed booked in advance,
every meal paid for with vouchers,
1640
01:38:54,596 --> 01:38:56,597
cautious jaunts in hired cars,
1641
01:38:56,681 --> 01:38:59,516
suitcase crammed with kaopectate.
1642
01:38:59,601 --> 01:39:02,269
What a fantastic surrender to the primitive.
1643
01:39:03,438 --> 01:39:05,522
And the "primitive."
I use that word endlessly.
1644
01:39:05,607 --> 01:39:07,274
"Ah, the primitive world," I say,
1645
01:39:07,358 --> 01:39:10,277
"What instinctual truths were lost with it."
1646
01:39:10,361 --> 01:39:12,779
And while I sit there baiting that poor,
1647
01:39:12,864 --> 01:39:15,365
unimaginative woman with the word,
1648
01:39:15,450 --> 01:39:18,785
that freaky boy is trying
to conjure the reality.
1649
01:39:18,870 --> 01:39:21,622
I look at pages of centaurs
trampling the soil of Argos.
1650
01:39:21,706 --> 01:39:22,706
And outside my window,
1651
01:39:22,790 --> 01:39:25,292
that boy is trying to become one
in a Hampshire field.
1652
01:39:25,376 --> 01:39:27,461
I sit there, night after night
watching that woman knitting,
1653
01:39:27,545 --> 01:39:30,380
a woman I haven't kissed in six years.
1654
01:39:30,882 --> 01:39:32,799
And he stands for an hour in the dark,
1655
01:39:32,884 --> 01:39:35,927
sucking the sweat off his god's hairy cheek.
1656
01:39:38,473 --> 01:39:41,725
Then in the morning,
I put away my books on the cultural shelf,
1657
01:39:41,851 --> 01:39:45,395
close up my kodachrome snaps
of Mount Olympus,
1658
01:39:45,897 --> 01:39:49,983
touch my reproduction statue
of Dionysus for luck,
1659
01:39:50,943 --> 01:39:53,904
and then go off to
the hospital to treat him...
1660
01:39:53,988 --> 01:39:55,447
For insanity.
1661
01:39:59,077 --> 01:40:00,327
Now do you see?
1662
01:40:13,341 --> 01:40:15,425
The boy's in pain, Martin.
1663
01:40:17,929 --> 01:40:19,596
That's all I see.
1664
01:40:30,274 --> 01:40:32,150
I understand, you know.
1665
01:40:33,611 --> 01:40:36,196
I'm not just being Mrs. Macbrisk.
1666
01:40:37,573 --> 01:40:40,158
You haven't made that kind of pain.
1667
01:40:40,743 --> 01:40:42,703
So few of us have.
1668
01:40:43,538 --> 01:40:46,081
But you've still made other things.
1669
01:40:46,165 --> 01:40:48,208
Your own thoughts. Your own skill.
1670
01:40:48,292 --> 01:40:50,335
Skill absolutely, what you said,
unique to you.
1671
01:40:50,420 --> 01:40:54,214
I've watched you do it, year after year,
and it's marvelous!
1672
01:40:54,465 --> 01:40:55,924
I mean, you can't just sit there now,
1673
01:40:56,008 --> 01:40:57,843
and say it's all provincial,
you're just a butcher.
1674
01:40:57,927 --> 01:41:00,637
All that stuff is stupid, hateful.
1675
01:41:02,306 --> 01:41:05,434
All right, you never galloped. Too bad.
1676
01:41:05,518 --> 01:41:09,396
Let me tell you, if I have to choose between
his galloping and your sheer training,
1677
01:41:09,480 --> 01:41:10,939
I'll take the training every time.
1678
01:41:11,023 --> 01:41:14,151
And what's more, so will the boy,
at this moment.
1679
01:41:16,654 --> 01:41:20,657
That stare of his isn't accusing you,
my dear, it's simply demanding.
1680
01:41:23,870 --> 01:41:25,579
- What?
- Just that.
1681
01:41:25,663 --> 01:41:30,000
Your power to pull him out of the nightmare
he's galloped himself into.
1682
01:41:37,008 --> 01:41:49,311
Do you see?
1683
01:42:23,346 --> 01:42:25,138
It is all true,
1684
01:42:25,223 --> 01:42:27,974
what I said after you tapped the pencil.
1685
01:42:28,059 --> 01:42:31,728
Postscriptum, I know why I'm in here.
1686
01:42:55,962 --> 01:42:58,129
I got your note. Thank you.
1687
01:42:59,757 --> 01:43:02,008
Also for the postscriptum.
1688
01:43:02,093 --> 01:43:03,593
Well, that's the right word.
Me mum told me.
1689
01:43:03,678 --> 01:43:05,929
It's Latin. It means "after writing."
1690
01:43:09,100 --> 01:43:11,309
Sorry I didn't see you today.
1691
01:43:12,061 --> 01:43:13,478
You're fed up with me?
1692
01:43:13,563 --> 01:43:14,604
Yes.
1693
01:43:15,982 --> 01:43:18,149
Can I make it up to you now?
1694
01:43:18,401 --> 01:43:20,026
What do you mean?
1695
01:43:20,611 --> 01:43:22,779
I thought we'd have a session.
1696
01:43:22,864 --> 01:43:23,864
Now?
1697
01:43:23,948 --> 01:43:25,824
Yes, at dead of night.
1698
01:43:27,118 --> 01:43:29,619
Better than going to sleep, isn't it?
1699
01:43:39,088 --> 01:43:40,589
Listen, Alan.
1700
01:43:41,465 --> 01:43:43,091
Everything I say has a trick or a catch.
1701
01:43:43,175 --> 01:43:44,551
Everything I do has a trick or a catch.
1702
01:43:44,635 --> 01:43:46,136
It's the only thing I know to do. But they...
1703
01:43:46,220 --> 01:43:48,054
They work. And you know that, don't you?
1704
01:43:48,139 --> 01:43:49,639
Now trust me.
1705
01:43:51,475 --> 01:43:53,768
You got another trick, then?
1706
01:43:53,853 --> 01:43:54,936
Yes.
1707
01:43:55,521 --> 01:43:57,772
- Truth drug?
- If you like.
1708
01:43:59,066 --> 01:44:00,525
What's it do?
1709
01:44:00,902 --> 01:44:02,736
Make it easier for you to talk.
1710
01:44:02,820 --> 01:44:04,195
What, like you can't help yourself?
1711
01:44:04,280 --> 01:44:08,241
Yes, like you have to speak the truth
at all costs, and all of it.
1712
01:44:11,245 --> 01:44:12,537
Where is it?
1713
01:44:12,622 --> 01:44:13,997
Here.
1714
01:44:14,498 --> 01:44:15,874
Let's see.
1715
01:44:28,262 --> 01:44:29,596
Is that really it?
1716
01:44:29,680 --> 01:44:30,805
Yes.
1717
01:44:31,432 --> 01:44:32,682
You want to try it?
1718
01:44:32,767 --> 01:44:33,850
No.
1719
01:44:34,268 --> 01:44:35,268
I think you do.
1720
01:44:35,353 --> 01:44:36,645
I don't, not at all.
1721
01:44:36,729 --> 01:44:38,104
Afterwards, you'd sleep.
1722
01:44:38,773 --> 01:44:40,357
You'd have no more bad dreams all night.
1723
01:44:40,441 --> 01:44:42,108
Probably for many nights from then on.
1724
01:44:44,946 --> 01:44:46,363
How long does it take to work?
1725
01:44:46,447 --> 01:44:48,865
- It's instant, like coffee.
- It isn't.
1726
01:44:49,825 --> 01:44:51,076
Promise.
1727
01:44:51,911 --> 01:44:53,036
Well?
1728
01:44:56,248 --> 01:44:58,041
Can I have a cigarette?
1729
01:45:00,628 --> 01:45:02,212
Pill first.
1730
01:45:51,595 --> 01:45:53,430
What'll I feel first?
1731
01:45:53,973 --> 01:45:55,473
Nothing much.
1732
01:45:56,100 --> 01:45:58,852
After a minute, about 100 green snakes
will come out of that cabinet,
1733
01:45:58,936 --> 01:46:01,354
singing the hallelujah chorus.
1734
01:46:02,523 --> 01:46:04,107
No, I'm serious.
1735
01:46:05,776 --> 01:46:07,569
You'll feel nothing.
1736
01:46:08,279 --> 01:46:11,531
Nothing is going to happen,
but what you want to happen.
1737
01:46:11,615 --> 01:46:15,285
You're not going to say anything to me,
but what you want to say.
1738
01:46:15,369 --> 01:46:17,787
Sit back. Relax.
1739
01:46:18,956 --> 01:46:20,790
Finish your cigarette.
1740
01:46:29,467 --> 01:46:32,385
Bet this room's heard some funny things.
1741
01:46:32,470 --> 01:46:34,095
It certainly has.
1742
01:46:36,140 --> 01:46:37,474
I like it.
1743
01:46:38,142 --> 01:46:40,060
- This room?
- Don't you?
1744
01:46:40,644 --> 01:46:42,270
Well, there's...
1745
01:46:42,646 --> 01:46:44,939
Nothing much to like, is there?
1746
01:46:47,318 --> 01:46:49,152
Actually, I'd like to leave this room,
and never...
1747
01:46:49,236 --> 01:46:51,362
Never set foot in it again in my life.
1748
01:46:53,032 --> 01:46:54,282
Why?
1749
01:46:54,992 --> 01:46:56,785
Been in it too long.
1750
01:46:57,787 --> 01:46:59,496
Where would you go?
1751
01:46:59,622 --> 01:47:00,872
Somewhere.
1752
01:47:01,207 --> 01:47:02,248
Secret?
1753
01:47:03,667 --> 01:47:04,876
Yes.
1754
01:47:06,837 --> 01:47:08,421
There's a sea...
1755
01:47:09,632 --> 01:47:11,508
A great sea that I love.
1756
01:47:13,344 --> 01:47:15,678
It's where the Gods used to bathe.
1757
01:47:16,472 --> 01:47:17,806
What Gods?
1758
01:47:18,682 --> 01:47:21,142
The old ones, before they died.
1759
01:47:22,228 --> 01:47:23,686
Gods don't die.
1760
01:47:26,524 --> 01:47:28,149
Oh, yes, they do.
1761
01:47:31,904 --> 01:47:33,363
Come with me.
1762
01:47:42,164 --> 01:47:44,833
It's a village I spent a night in once,
1763
01:47:45,376 --> 01:47:47,293
where I'd like to live.
1764
01:47:48,129 --> 01:47:49,462
All white.
1765
01:47:57,888 --> 01:47:59,180
How would you nosy parker, though?
1766
01:47:59,265 --> 01:48:01,391
You wouldn't have a room for it anymore.
1767
01:48:01,475 --> 01:48:03,643
Well, I wouldn't mind.
1768
01:48:03,727 --> 01:48:06,646
I don't actually enjoy being
a nosy parker, you know.
1769
01:48:06,730 --> 01:48:07,897
Then why do it?
1770
01:48:07,982 --> 01:48:09,607
Because you're unhappy.
1771
01:48:09,692 --> 01:48:11,067
So are you.
1772
01:48:13,445 --> 01:48:15,405
Here, I didn't mean that.
1773
01:48:15,990 --> 01:48:17,073
It's all right.
1774
01:48:17,741 --> 01:48:18,783
No... is that how it works?
1775
01:48:18,868 --> 01:48:21,995
Things just slip out
without you feeling anything?
1776
01:48:22,079 --> 01:48:23,079
Yes.
1777
01:48:24,999 --> 01:48:26,124
So quick.
1778
01:48:26,208 --> 01:48:27,584
I told you.
1779
01:48:29,003 --> 01:48:31,004
You can say anything under it?
1780
01:48:31,088 --> 01:48:32,380
Yes.
1781
01:48:48,647 --> 01:48:49,898
Well, ask me a question.
1782
01:48:59,909 --> 01:49:01,242
All right.
1783
01:49:04,955 --> 01:49:06,122
Tell me about Jill.
1784
01:49:08,334 --> 01:49:09,584
Nothing to tell.
1785
01:49:09,668 --> 01:49:10,919
Nothing?
1786
01:49:12,463 --> 01:49:15,173
Well, for example, is she, uh, pretty?
1787
01:49:15,257 --> 01:49:16,549
You've never described her to me.
1788
01:49:17,801 --> 01:49:19,427
She's all right.
1789
01:49:20,179 --> 01:49:22,138
What color is her hair?
1790
01:49:23,098 --> 01:49:25,558
- Don't know.
- Is it long or short?
1791
01:49:26,143 --> 01:49:27,310
Don't know.
1792
01:49:27,645 --> 01:49:29,437
Now, come on, Alan, surely,
you must know that.
1793
01:49:29,521 --> 01:49:31,147
I don't remember. I don't!
1794
01:49:32,858 --> 01:49:33,983
Alan,
1795
01:49:34,693 --> 01:49:37,737
you're going to do this, and do it now.
1796
01:49:37,821 --> 01:49:40,156
You're going to tell me everything
that happened with this girl.
1797
01:49:40,282 --> 01:49:42,825
And now, not just tell me, show me.
1798
01:49:43,202 --> 01:49:46,704
Act it out, if you like,
even more than when I tapped the pencil.
1799
01:49:46,789 --> 01:49:49,249
I want you to feel free to do anything
you like in this room.
1800
01:49:49,500 --> 01:49:52,210
The pill will help you, I will help you.
1801
01:49:52,962 --> 01:49:56,256
Now describe her to me.
Is her hair long or short?
1802
01:49:57,591 --> 01:49:58,675
Down to here.
1803
01:49:58,759 --> 01:49:59,884
- You sure?
- Yes.
1804
01:50:02,096 --> 01:50:03,179
Well?
1805
01:50:03,514 --> 01:50:04,722
She was posh.
1806
01:50:04,807 --> 01:50:05,848
You mean snobbish?
1807
01:50:05,933 --> 01:50:07,517
Yeah, no. I don't know!
1808
01:50:08,519 --> 01:50:10,353
- She was always looking.
- At you?
1809
01:50:10,437 --> 01:50:12,230
Saying stupid things.
1810
01:50:14,275 --> 01:50:15,566
Always asking questions.
1811
01:50:15,651 --> 01:50:16,693
Like what?
1812
01:50:16,777 --> 01:50:18,653
Do you find them sexy?
1813
01:50:18,946 --> 01:50:20,029
What?
1814
01:50:20,864 --> 01:50:22,031
Horses.
1815
01:50:22,116 --> 01:50:23,616
Don't be daft.
1816
01:50:24,535 --> 01:50:25,785
Girls do.
1817
01:50:26,203 --> 01:50:29,956
I mean, they go through a period
where they pat them and kiss them a lot.
1818
01:50:30,040 --> 01:50:31,541
I know I did.
1819
01:50:34,044 --> 01:50:35,545
I suppose it's just a substitute, really.
1820
01:50:35,629 --> 01:50:37,255
That kind of thing, all the time.
1821
01:50:37,506 --> 01:50:38,548
Till one night...
1822
01:50:38,632 --> 01:50:39,632
Yes, what?
1823
01:50:39,717 --> 01:50:42,302
It was her idea.
She got me into it, the whole thing.
1824
01:50:42,386 --> 01:50:44,220
What are you saying?
One night? Go on from there.
1825
01:50:45,055 --> 01:50:47,807
It was a Saturday night.
We were just closing up.
1826
01:50:47,891 --> 01:50:49,976
How would you like to take me out?
1827
01:50:51,228 --> 01:50:52,312
What?
1828
01:50:52,396 --> 01:50:54,897
How would you like to take me out tonight?
1829
01:50:55,941 --> 01:50:57,191
No, I've got to go home.
1830
01:50:57,276 --> 01:50:58,568
What for?
1831
01:50:59,111 --> 01:51:00,528
They expect me.
1832
01:51:01,030 --> 01:51:03,698
Ring up and say you're going out.
1833
01:51:03,782 --> 01:51:05,033
I can't.
1834
01:51:05,576 --> 01:51:06,826
Why not?
1835
01:51:07,745 --> 01:51:09,120
They expect me.
1836
01:51:09,538 --> 01:51:12,999
Look, either we go out together
and have some fun,
1837
01:51:13,083 --> 01:51:15,501
or you go back to
your boring home, as usual,
1838
01:51:15,586 --> 01:51:17,503
and I go back to mine.
1839
01:51:17,588 --> 01:51:19,255
That's the situation, isn't it?
1840
01:51:20,466 --> 01:51:21,799
Where would we go?
1841
01:51:22,468 --> 01:51:24,886
There's a skin flick over in Winchester.
1842
01:51:24,970 --> 01:51:26,679
I've never seen one. Have you?
1843
01:51:28,891 --> 01:51:30,224
Wouldn't you like to?
1844
01:51:30,559 --> 01:51:33,603
All those heavy Swedes
panting at one another.
1845
01:51:34,271 --> 01:51:35,355
Well?
1846
01:51:36,106 --> 01:51:37,690
What do you say?
1847
01:51:40,152 --> 01:51:41,402
Yeah.
1848
01:51:47,201 --> 01:51:48,284
Well?
1849
01:51:49,119 --> 01:51:50,203
So you did?
1850
01:51:50,454 --> 01:51:51,746
I'm tired now. I want to stop.
1851
01:51:51,830 --> 01:51:54,457
- Come on, now. You can't stop there.
- Well, I'm tired, I want to go to bed!
1852
01:51:54,541 --> 01:51:55,541
- Well, you can't.
- Why?
1853
01:51:55,626 --> 01:51:56,709
I want to hear about that film.
1854
01:51:56,794 --> 01:51:58,669
- Hear what? What? It was bloody awful.
- Why?
1855
01:51:58,754 --> 01:52:00,171
- Nosy parker!
- Why?
1856
01:52:00,255 --> 01:52:01,756
- Because...
- Yes?
1857
01:52:03,300 --> 01:52:05,051
The whole place was full of men.
1858
01:52:05,135 --> 01:52:06,844
Jill was the only girl.
1859
01:52:08,263 --> 01:52:09,305
It was daft.
1860
01:52:09,390 --> 01:52:10,890
All took place in Sweden.
1861
01:52:10,974 --> 01:52:13,851
There was this girl, Brita, who was 16.
1862
01:52:14,395 --> 01:52:17,021
She went to stay in this house
where there was an older boy.
1863
01:52:17,106 --> 01:52:18,648
He kept giving her looks.
1864
01:52:19,024 --> 01:52:21,234
But she ignored him completely.
1865
01:52:21,318 --> 01:52:22,568
Instead, she took a shower.
1866
01:52:23,821 --> 01:52:25,780
She went into the bathroom
and took off all her clothes,
1867
01:52:25,864 --> 01:52:27,949
the lot, very, very slowly.
1868
01:52:28,826 --> 01:52:30,493
It was fantastic.
1869
01:52:31,036 --> 01:52:34,080
Water fell down her,
bouncing off her breasts.
1870
01:52:34,998 --> 01:52:37,083
Is that the first time
you'd ever seen a girl naked?
1871
01:52:37,167 --> 01:52:38,334
Yes.
1872
01:52:38,419 --> 01:52:39,961
Couldn't see everything, though.
1873
01:52:41,296 --> 01:52:42,755
It was funny.
1874
01:52:42,840 --> 01:52:44,465
All around me, all the men were staring up,
1875
01:52:44,550 --> 01:52:46,592
like they were in a church.
1876
01:52:47,469 --> 01:52:49,554
Like a secret congregation.
1877
01:52:50,264 --> 01:52:52,765
Like those early Christians
my mum talks about,
1878
01:52:52,850 --> 01:52:55,810
the ones that came together
in caves underground.
1879
01:52:56,854 --> 01:52:58,187
And then...
1880
01:53:00,107 --> 01:53:02,150
- Christ!
- What?
1881
01:53:02,234 --> 01:53:03,317
Dad!
1882
01:53:04,069 --> 01:53:05,903
I think he saw me.
1883
01:53:07,448 --> 01:53:08,865
Alan!
1884
01:53:09,366 --> 01:53:11,742
You can hear me. Don't pretend.
1885
01:53:12,453 --> 01:53:13,661
Do I have to come and fetch you? Alan!
1886
01:53:13,745 --> 01:53:14,787
Shut up, will you?
1887
01:53:14,872 --> 01:53:16,456
- Alan!
- Stop it!
1888
01:53:16,540 --> 01:53:18,583
- Come here this instant. Come on!
- But, Dad!
1889
01:53:18,667 --> 01:53:19,876
Come on.
1890
01:53:32,055 --> 01:53:33,139
You went with him, then?
1891
01:53:33,223 --> 01:53:35,099
What else could I do?
1892
01:53:35,184 --> 01:53:36,726
It was weird.
1893
01:53:36,810 --> 01:53:39,228
I mean, it turned into follow the leader.
1894
01:53:39,313 --> 01:53:41,397
Dad trying to look impressive, and me,
1895
01:53:41,482 --> 01:53:43,649
I suppose, thinking I ought to copy him.
1896
01:53:43,734 --> 01:53:45,526
It was absolutely stupid.
1897
01:53:45,903 --> 01:53:47,862
We stood at the bus stop,
like we were three people in a queue,
1898
01:53:47,946 --> 01:53:49,739
who didn't know each other.
1899
01:53:51,742 --> 01:53:53,993
We must have stayed like that
for five minutes.
1900
01:53:54,077 --> 01:53:55,828
I tried to speak, I said,
1901
01:53:55,913 --> 01:53:58,498
I've never been in there before in my life.
1902
01:53:58,582 --> 01:53:59,749
Never.
1903
01:54:00,542 --> 01:54:01,751
Honest.
1904
01:54:03,128 --> 01:54:04,504
Jill tried.
1905
01:54:04,796 --> 01:54:06,005
It's true, Mr. Strang.
1906
01:54:06,089 --> 01:54:09,592
It wasn't Alan's idea to go there at all.
It was mine.
1907
01:54:09,718 --> 01:54:12,178
I'm not shocked by films like that, I just...
1908
01:54:12,262 --> 01:54:14,639
Think they're silly, that's all.
1909
01:54:15,474 --> 01:54:17,141
Bus wouldn't come.
1910
01:54:17,601 --> 01:54:19,310
We stood, we stood.
1911
01:54:20,103 --> 01:54:22,396
And then suddenly, he spoke.
1912
01:54:22,481 --> 01:54:25,191
It felt like it was somebody else
talking for him.
1913
01:54:25,275 --> 01:54:27,777
I would like you to know something,
1914
01:54:28,111 --> 01:54:29,529
both of you.
1915
01:54:32,449 --> 01:54:33,824
Hey!
1916
01:54:39,790 --> 01:54:42,667
I came here tonight to see the manager.
1917
01:54:43,377 --> 01:54:46,587
He asked me to call on him
for business purposes.
1918
01:54:48,799 --> 01:54:51,259
I happen to be a printer, miss...
1919
01:54:53,679 --> 01:54:54,804
The picture house needs posters.
1920
01:54:54,888 --> 01:54:58,307
That is entirely why I'm here,
to discuss posters.
1921
01:55:00,185 --> 01:55:03,980
And while I was there,
I happened to glance in, and I saw...
1922
01:55:05,065 --> 01:55:07,900
I can only say that I am going
to complain to the council.
1923
01:55:07,985 --> 01:55:10,236
I had no idea they showed films like this.
1924
01:55:10,320 --> 01:55:13,281
I'm certainly going to refuse my services.
1925
01:55:13,615 --> 01:55:15,116
Yes, of course.
1926
01:55:17,160 --> 01:55:19,495
So long as that is understood.
1927
01:55:19,663 --> 01:55:20,997
Perfectly.
1928
01:55:31,717 --> 01:55:33,342
Come along, Alan.
1929
01:55:35,804 --> 01:55:36,846
No.
1930
01:55:39,182 --> 01:55:42,059
No fuss, please.
Just... just say good night to the young lady.
1931
01:55:42,394 --> 01:55:45,605
No, I'm stopping here.
I've got to see her home.
1932
01:55:46,231 --> 01:55:47,356
It's proper.
1933
01:55:49,276 --> 01:55:51,193
Hmph. Very well.
1934
01:55:51,737 --> 01:55:54,071
I'll see you when you choose to return, then.
1935
01:55:57,200 --> 01:55:58,951
Very well. Yes.
1936
01:56:14,676 --> 01:56:15,718
Terrible.
1937
01:56:15,802 --> 01:56:16,886
What was?
1938
01:56:16,970 --> 01:56:18,512
His face.
1939
01:56:18,805 --> 01:56:20,306
He was scared.
1940
01:56:20,724 --> 01:56:21,849
Scared of me.
1941
01:56:35,405 --> 01:56:37,323
We've got to walk.
1942
01:56:40,619 --> 01:56:42,370
It's four miles.
1943
01:56:46,500 --> 01:56:47,708
Yes?
1944
01:56:47,876 --> 01:56:49,752
What were you thinking?
1945
01:56:51,254 --> 01:56:53,381
It was like I'd been fooled.
1946
01:56:54,257 --> 01:56:57,426
Like I was the only person who didn't know.
1947
01:56:59,012 --> 01:57:01,389
Every man in the street,
everyone I've ever seen, they all do it.
1948
01:57:01,473 --> 01:57:02,765
All of them, they're not just dads.
1949
01:57:02,849 --> 01:57:05,267
They're all people with pricks.
1950
01:57:05,686 --> 01:57:08,854
And my dad, he's not just a dad either.
He's a man with a prick, too.
1951
01:57:08,939 --> 01:57:10,356
He's nothing special.
1952
01:57:10,440 --> 01:57:14,110
Nothing special at all.
Just a poor old sod on his own.
1953
01:57:14,611 --> 01:57:17,029
He goes off at night
and does his own secret thing,
1954
01:57:17,114 --> 01:57:19,949
which no one will know about, just like me.
1955
01:57:20,075 --> 01:57:21,701
You were happy
at that second, weren't you,
1956
01:57:21,785 --> 01:57:23,411
when you thought about your dad?
1957
01:57:23,537 --> 01:57:25,204
Other people have secrets, too.
1958
01:57:25,288 --> 01:57:26,747
Not just you.
1959
01:57:27,916 --> 01:57:28,958
Yes.
1960
01:57:29,042 --> 01:57:31,460
And you felt free, didn't you?
1961
01:57:31,545 --> 01:57:33,546
Free to do almost anything.
1962
01:57:33,630 --> 01:57:34,672
Yes.
1963
01:57:37,217 --> 01:57:38,968
What's in your head?
1964
01:57:40,137 --> 01:57:41,679
Her eyes.
1965
01:57:42,639 --> 01:57:44,432
I keep looking at them,
because I really want...
1966
01:57:47,018 --> 01:57:48,686
I really wanted...
1967
01:57:50,897 --> 01:57:53,274
To look at her breasts?
1968
01:57:54,151 --> 01:57:55,526
Yes.
1969
01:57:57,696 --> 01:57:59,321
I love your eyes.
1970
01:58:01,324 --> 01:58:03,325
Her face was so warm.
1971
01:58:05,036 --> 01:58:06,954
You want her very much?
1972
01:58:08,165 --> 01:58:09,123
I can't!
1973
01:58:09,207 --> 01:58:10,791
- Go on.
- I can't!
1974
01:58:10,876 --> 01:58:12,293
Of course you can.
You're doing wonderfully.
1975
01:58:12,419 --> 01:58:13,586
Don't make me, please.
1976
01:58:13,670 --> 01:58:16,672
Don't think, just answer. Come on, Alan.
1977
01:58:19,968 --> 01:58:22,011
Where are you now, Alan?
1978
01:58:24,681 --> 01:58:27,683
Cabbages, with the moon on them.
1979
01:58:28,185 --> 01:58:29,602
Like steel.
1980
01:58:31,897 --> 01:58:34,940
All the country, like it's been steel-plated.
1981
01:58:37,027 --> 01:58:39,445
I know absolutely where we're going.
1982
01:58:39,529 --> 01:58:40,863
Absolutely.
1983
01:58:42,073 --> 01:58:43,783
And I can't stop it.
1984
01:58:43,867 --> 01:58:45,326
What?
1985
01:58:46,036 --> 01:58:47,119
Nothing.
1986
01:58:47,204 --> 01:58:48,704
Come on, then.
1987
01:58:50,248 --> 01:58:52,208
Where do you go now?
1988
01:58:52,292 --> 01:58:53,876
Into his temple?
1989
01:58:54,252 --> 01:58:55,961
His holy of holies?
1990
01:58:56,880 --> 01:58:59,548
What else can I do?
1991
01:59:54,729 --> 01:59:56,146
Are you all right?
1992
01:59:56,231 --> 01:59:57,857
Why?
1993
01:59:57,941 --> 01:59:59,149
You look weird.
1994
02:00:10,287 --> 02:00:11,620
Come here.
1995
02:00:31,182 --> 02:00:35,644
Hello.
1996
02:00:39,524 --> 02:00:41,609
Good things come in threes.
1997
02:00:47,115 --> 02:00:48,449
What's the matter?
1998
02:00:49,659 --> 02:00:50,784
Alan?
1999
02:00:52,162 --> 02:00:53,829
What is it? Say.
2000
02:00:58,543 --> 02:01:00,419
Yes, all right, leave.
2001
02:01:13,433 --> 02:01:15,559
Take your sweater off.
2002
02:01:20,190 --> 02:01:21,982
I will, if you will.
2003
02:02:04,234 --> 02:02:05,901
You're beautiful.
2004
02:02:07,779 --> 02:02:09,488
So are you.
2005
02:02:28,049 --> 02:02:30,884
She put her mouth in mine.
2006
02:02:32,804 --> 02:02:37,975
It was lovely.
2007
02:02:39,310 --> 02:02:41,478
What did you do then?
2008
02:02:42,105 --> 02:02:43,689
I put it in her.
2009
02:02:43,773 --> 02:02:45,899
- Yes?
- I put it in her.
2010
02:02:46,776 --> 02:02:48,193
- You did?
- Yes.
2011
02:02:48,903 --> 02:02:50,779
- Was it easy?
- Yes.
2012
02:02:51,072 --> 02:02:52,114
Describe it.
2013
02:02:52,198 --> 02:02:53,282
I told you.
2014
02:02:53,366 --> 02:02:54,867
What, exactly?
2015
02:02:55,160 --> 02:02:56,702
- I put it in her.
- Did you?
2016
02:02:57,495 --> 02:02:58,704
- Yes.
- Did you?
2017
02:02:58,872 --> 02:03:00,205
- All the way.
- Did you, Alan?
2018
02:03:00,290 --> 02:03:03,167
All the way, I shoved it.
I put it in her all the way.
2019
02:03:03,251 --> 02:03:04,376
- Did you?
- Yes.
2020
02:03:04,502 --> 02:03:05,586
- Did you, Alan?
- Yes! Yes!
2021
02:03:05,670 --> 02:03:07,046
Tell me the truth, Alan. Did you?
2022
02:03:07,130 --> 02:03:08,422
Fuck off!
2023
02:03:12,635 --> 02:03:14,678
What was it?
2024
02:03:14,888 --> 02:03:17,973
You couldn't, though you...
wanted to very much?
2025
02:03:18,516 --> 02:03:20,225
I couldn't see her.
2026
02:03:20,852 --> 02:03:22,061
What do you mean?
2027
02:03:22,145 --> 02:03:23,395
Only him!
2028
02:03:24,272 --> 02:03:26,982
Every time I kissed her, he was in the way.
2029
02:03:27,067 --> 02:03:28,734
- Who?
- You know who!
2030
02:03:29,944 --> 02:03:31,612
When I touched her, I felt him.
2031
02:03:31,696 --> 02:03:34,490
His side under me, waiting for my hand.
2032
02:03:34,574 --> 02:03:36,408
I refused him. I looked...
2033
02:03:36,493 --> 02:03:38,827
Looked right at her, and I couldn't do it.
2034
02:03:40,288 --> 02:03:43,749
When I shut my eyes,
I saw him at once, the streaks on his belly.
2035
02:03:44,209 --> 02:03:46,168
I couldn't feel her flesh at all.
2036
02:03:47,170 --> 02:03:48,420
I wanted the foam...
2037
02:03:48,505 --> 02:03:49,755
Off his neck,
2038
02:03:49,839 --> 02:03:52,508
not flesh, hide, horse hide.
2039
02:03:54,511 --> 02:03:56,470
And I couldn't even kiss her.
2040
02:04:07,315 --> 02:04:08,774
- Hello?
- No.
2041
02:04:11,861 --> 02:04:15,781
It's all right.
2042
02:04:16,449 --> 02:04:17,908
I don't mind.
2043
02:04:18,618 --> 02:04:20,202
Really, I don't.
2044
02:04:22,288 --> 02:04:23,372
Alan?
2045
02:04:25,416 --> 02:04:26,834
- Look at me.
- Get out.
2046
02:04:27,001 --> 02:04:28,293
- What?
- Out!
2047
02:04:30,421 --> 02:04:32,256
There's nothing wrong.
2048
02:04:33,383 --> 02:04:34,758
Believe me.
2049
02:04:35,635 --> 02:04:37,010
Please, believe me,
there's nothing at all wrong.
2050
02:04:37,095 --> 02:04:38,345
Get out!
2051
02:04:45,895 --> 02:04:47,354
Listen to me.
2052
02:04:48,773 --> 02:04:51,775
Why don't we just
sit down for a bit and talk?
2053
02:04:51,860 --> 02:04:53,068
Please.
2054
02:04:53,862 --> 02:04:55,737
- Just talk?
- Please.
2055
02:04:59,826 --> 02:05:02,369
Look, Alan,
there's nothing wrong, you know.
2056
02:05:02,453 --> 02:05:04,079
It happens sometimes.
2057
02:05:07,333 --> 02:05:09,543
It really doesn't matter.
2058
02:05:09,752 --> 02:05:13,505
Well, you tell anyone,
just you tell and see, that's all.
2059
02:05:13,590 --> 02:05:15,716
What do you think I am, Alan?
2060
02:05:15,800 --> 02:05:17,426
I'm your friend.
2061
02:05:26,436 --> 02:05:27,519
Do you want me to go, then?
2062
02:05:27,604 --> 02:05:28,812
Get out!
2063
02:05:48,541 --> 02:05:50,167
Equus.
2064
02:05:54,130 --> 02:05:55,297
Equus.
2065
02:06:05,433 --> 02:06:08,852
Friend.
2066
02:06:09,604 --> 02:06:11,313
Equus the merciful.
2067
02:06:12,190 --> 02:06:13,565
Forgive me.
2068
02:06:14,484 --> 02:06:16,485
It wasn't me, not really me.
2069
02:06:16,986 --> 02:06:18,487
Take me back.
2070
02:06:18,738 --> 02:06:20,948
I'll never do it again, I swear, please.
2071
02:06:22,242 --> 02:06:23,617
Please.
2072
02:06:24,285 --> 02:06:26,578
And he? What does he say?
2073
02:06:26,663 --> 02:06:28,789
"Mine. You're mine.
2074
02:06:29,749 --> 02:06:32,084
"I am yours, and you are mine.
2075
02:06:32,168 --> 02:06:35,337
"I see you. I see you, always,
2076
02:06:35,546 --> 02:06:36,964
"everywhere, forever."
2077
02:06:37,048 --> 02:06:38,507
"Kiss anyone, and I will see.
2078
02:06:38,841 --> 02:06:40,717
"Lie with anyone, and I will see.
2079
02:06:40,802 --> 02:06:41,885
Ahh!
2080
02:06:41,970 --> 02:06:43,053
"And you will fail, Alan.
2081
02:06:43,137 --> 02:06:44,763
"Forever and ever you will fail.
2082
02:06:45,598 --> 02:06:47,474
"You will see me, and you will fail.
2083
02:06:48,268 --> 02:06:51,144
"The Lord thy God is a jealous God."
2084
02:06:51,229 --> 02:06:52,729
He sees you, Alan.
2085
02:06:52,814 --> 02:06:54,940
He sees you, forever and ever, Alan.
2086
02:06:55,024 --> 02:06:57,192
He sees you. He sees you.
2087
02:06:57,277 --> 02:07:01,363
Eyes, white eyes all round.
Eyes, like flames coming, coming. God sees.
2088
02:07:01,447 --> 02:07:03,699
God sees. My God hast seen!
2089
02:07:09,455 --> 02:07:10,497
No.
2090
02:07:14,252 --> 02:07:15,794
No more, Equus.
2091
02:07:28,308 --> 02:07:29,641
Thou, God,
2092
02:07:31,185 --> 02:07:32,394
seest...
2093
02:07:35,481 --> 02:07:36,732
Nothing.
2094
02:07:45,908 --> 02:07:47,284
Nothing!
2095
02:08:26,115 --> 02:08:28,784
Here I am. Find me. Find me.
2096
02:08:29,285 --> 02:08:30,952
Kill me. Kill me.
2097
02:08:31,287 --> 02:08:33,121
Find me, and kill me.
2098
02:08:33,206 --> 02:08:34,289
Kill me!
2099
02:08:34,374 --> 02:08:35,415
Find me!
2100
02:08:35,500 --> 02:08:36,541
And kill me!
2101
02:08:36,626 --> 02:08:38,126
Here I am. Here I am.
2102
02:08:38,252 --> 02:08:40,295
Find me. Kill me.
2103
02:08:40,421 --> 02:08:43,965
Find me and kill me.
2104
02:08:44,425 --> 02:08:46,385
Find me and kill me!
2105
02:08:49,847 --> 02:08:53,350
Kill me!
2106
02:08:55,186 --> 02:08:56,269
Argh!
2107
02:09:09,992 --> 02:09:11,034
Alan.
2108
02:09:11,119 --> 02:09:12,077
Alan. Alan.
2109
02:09:13,329 --> 02:09:14,413
Breathe. Breathe in.
2110
02:09:15,540 --> 02:09:17,040
Calm, Alan. Calm. Calm.
2111
02:09:18,167 --> 02:09:19,209
Calm.
2112
02:09:19,293 --> 02:09:20,752
Now breathe in, deep.
2113
02:09:21,462 --> 02:09:22,546
Deep.
2114
02:09:22,713 --> 02:09:23,839
Breathe in.
2115
02:09:23,923 --> 02:09:25,465
Out. In.
2116
02:09:26,676 --> 02:09:28,176
Out. In.
2117
02:09:29,011 --> 02:09:30,053
Out.
2118
02:09:30,138 --> 02:09:31,930
Come on. Come on, that's a good boy.
2119
02:09:32,014 --> 02:09:34,641
Keep it going. In. Out.
2120
02:09:35,059 --> 02:09:37,102
In. Out.
2121
02:09:38,688 --> 02:09:40,355
Keep it going. Keep it going.
2122
02:09:40,523 --> 02:09:42,107
Keep it going.
2123
02:09:42,191 --> 02:09:44,609
Easy, now. Easy, now. There.
2124
02:09:44,986 --> 02:09:46,069
There.
2125
02:09:46,154 --> 02:09:48,155
It's all over now, Alan. All over now.
2126
02:09:49,866 --> 02:09:52,325
He'll go away now.
You'll never see him again.
2127
02:09:52,410 --> 02:09:54,911
You'll never see him again, I promise you.
2128
02:09:55,079 --> 02:09:57,581
There'll be no more bad dreams.
No more awful nights.
2129
02:09:57,665 --> 02:09:59,166
Think of that.
2130
02:09:59,292 --> 02:10:02,335
You're going to be well.
I'm going to make you well.
2131
02:10:04,005 --> 02:10:05,630
I promise you.
2132
02:10:05,715 --> 02:10:07,382
You just trust me.
2133
02:10:07,717 --> 02:10:09,009
Trust me.
2134
02:10:09,635 --> 02:10:10,802
Just trust me.
2135
02:10:10,887 --> 02:10:12,095
Trust me.
2136
02:10:13,723 --> 02:10:15,390
Now trust me, Alan.
2137
02:10:19,228 --> 02:10:20,729
You lie back.
2138
02:10:20,980 --> 02:10:22,230
Lie back.
2139
02:10:54,889 --> 02:10:56,056
Sleep.
2140
02:10:57,433 --> 02:10:58,808
Just sleep.
2141
02:11:00,186 --> 02:11:01,811
You've earned it.
2142
02:11:03,272 --> 02:11:04,648
Sleep, Alan.
2143
02:11:05,608 --> 02:11:06,775
Sleep.
2144
02:11:08,110 --> 02:11:09,361
Remember,
2145
02:11:10,363 --> 02:11:12,030
he'll go away now.
2146
02:11:12,532 --> 02:11:14,533
I'm going to make you well.
2147
02:11:16,744 --> 02:11:20,956
Sleep.
2148
02:11:54,198 --> 02:11:55,657
I'm lying to you, Alan.
2149
02:11:58,786 --> 02:12:01,204
He won't really go that easily,
2150
02:12:02,164 --> 02:12:05,083
just clop away,
like some nice old carthorse.
2151
02:12:08,004 --> 02:12:11,756
No, when Equus leaves,
if he leaves at all, it'll be with your...
2152
02:12:11,882 --> 02:12:14,217
Intestines in his teeth.
2153
02:12:15,761 --> 02:12:17,137
And I don't
2154
02:12:17,722 --> 02:12:19,639
stock replacements.
2155
02:12:21,767 --> 02:12:23,810
The boy's in pain, Martin.
2156
02:12:24,729 --> 02:12:26,354
Yes.
2157
02:12:26,647 --> 02:12:29,065
But you can take it away.
2158
02:12:29,150 --> 02:12:30,775
Yes.
2159
02:12:31,068 --> 02:12:34,112
Then that has to be enough for you.
2160
02:12:34,530 --> 02:12:35,864
All right.
2161
02:12:36,073 --> 02:12:38,491
I'll take it away. What then?
2162
02:12:38,868 --> 02:12:41,911
He'll feel himself acceptable. What then?
2163
02:12:41,996 --> 02:12:44,956
You think feelings like his
can be simply reattached,
2164
02:12:45,041 --> 02:12:48,335
like plasters stuck
on other objects we select?
2165
02:12:48,711 --> 02:12:49,794
I mean, look at him.
2166
02:12:49,879 --> 02:12:53,590
My desire might be to make of this boy
an ardent husband, a caring citizen,
2167
02:12:53,674 --> 02:12:56,426
a worshipper of abstract and unifying God.
2168
02:12:56,510 --> 02:13:00,221
My achievement, however,
is more likely to make a ghost.
2169
02:13:01,974 --> 02:13:04,684
I'll heal the rash on his body.
2170
02:13:04,769 --> 02:13:08,688
I'll erase the welts cut into his mind
by flying manes.
2171
02:13:08,773 --> 02:13:11,274
And when that's done,
I'll put him on a metal scooter,
2172
02:13:11,359 --> 02:13:13,985
and send him puttering off
into the concrete world,
2173
02:13:14,070 --> 02:13:16,154
and he'll never touch hide again.
2174
02:13:17,198 --> 02:13:21,117
Hopefully, he'll feel nothing
at his fork but approved flesh,
2175
02:13:21,202 --> 02:13:24,371
I doubt, however, with much passion.
2176
02:13:28,042 --> 02:13:29,668
Passion, you see,
2177
02:13:30,336 --> 02:13:32,420
can be destroyed by a doctor.
2178
02:13:34,340 --> 02:13:36,132
It cannot be created.
2179
02:13:41,847 --> 02:13:44,265
You won't gallop anymore, Alan.
2180
02:13:45,309 --> 02:13:46,935
Horses will be quite safe.
2181
02:13:48,604 --> 02:13:50,855
You'll save your money every week,
2182
02:13:50,940 --> 02:13:53,483
and change that scooter for a car,
2183
02:13:53,776 --> 02:13:56,152
and spend glorious weekends
2184
02:13:56,320 --> 02:13:57,821
grooming that.
2185
02:13:58,781 --> 02:14:00,323
You'll pop round to the betting shop
2186
02:14:00,408 --> 02:14:03,660
and put the odd 50 pence on the nags,
2187
02:14:04,453 --> 02:14:06,579
quite forgetting that they ever meant
anything more to you
2188
02:14:06,664 --> 02:14:09,916
than bearers of little profits
and little losses.
2189
02:14:10,543 --> 02:14:13,962
You will, however, be without pain,
2190
02:14:15,339 --> 02:14:17,590
almost completely without...
2191
02:14:19,677 --> 02:14:20,802
Pain.
2192
02:14:23,639 --> 02:14:24,848
And now,
2193
02:14:26,434 --> 02:14:27,642
for me,
2194
02:14:29,770 --> 02:14:31,312
it never stops,
2195
02:14:32,565 --> 02:14:34,315
the voice of Equus,
2196
02:14:35,317 --> 02:14:36,901
out of the cave.
2197
02:14:38,362 --> 02:14:42,615
"Why me?
2198
02:14:43,701 --> 02:14:44,993
"First...
2199
02:14:46,328 --> 02:14:47,996
"Account for me."
2200
02:14:50,332 --> 02:14:51,666
How can I?
2201
02:14:54,295 --> 02:14:56,087
In an ultimate sense,
2202
02:14:56,881 --> 02:14:58,965
I cannot know what I do in this place.
2203
02:15:00,801 --> 02:15:02,844
Yet I do ultimate things,
2204
02:15:03,846 --> 02:15:05,597
irreversible things.
2205
02:15:07,808 --> 02:15:09,017
And I...
2206
02:15:10,269 --> 02:15:14,355
I stand in the dark with a blade in my hand,
2207
02:15:15,316 --> 02:15:16,983
striking at heads.
2208
02:15:19,361 --> 02:15:20,612
I need...
2209
02:15:21,322 --> 02:15:24,115
More desperately
than my children need me,
2210
02:15:24,200 --> 02:15:26,367
a way of seeing in the dark.
2211
02:15:26,994 --> 02:15:28,620
What way is this?
2212
02:15:28,746 --> 02:15:30,413
What dark is this?
2213
02:15:31,040 --> 02:15:34,000
I cannot call it ordained of God!
2214
02:15:34,084 --> 02:15:35,835
I cannot go so far!
2215
02:15:41,884 --> 02:15:43,468
I will, however,
2216
02:15:43,886 --> 02:15:46,387
pay it so much homage.
2217
02:15:49,558 --> 02:15:51,726
There is now, in my mouth,
2218
02:15:52,436 --> 02:15:55,730
this sharp chain.
2219
02:16:00,319 --> 02:16:02,111
And it never comes out.
153475
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