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-Do you think this is navy?
-No.
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I would say it is, actually, yeah.
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Jesus, really?
4
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Yeah.
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No, honest to God, I think it's black.
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Never would I have said navy.
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I think Lucy recognized
that there were chimps
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and that chimps were a different category,
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but I don't think she put
herself in that other category.
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I think she saw herself as a human.
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I was 25 when I first met Lucy.
12
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I was a graduate student at
the University of Oklahoma.
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Norman was a really
nice little university town.
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I was really happy there,
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working in the primate studies group
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that had many chimps,
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and we used those chimps in our research.
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This animal study complex
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is where chimpanzees are
being taught to communicate
20
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with the same sign language
used by deaf persons.
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Aww.
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Oh, excuse me,
I don't mean to laugh at your face,
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it's a very sweet face.
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I was just looking
for some part-time work
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to help put myself through school.
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I thought it was appropriate
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that it would have
something to do with chimps.
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She had a little bit of a
reputation of being aggressive.
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I had already heard the story
30
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about her jumping through a glass window
31
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at the previous person who had had the job
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that I was going to apply for.
33
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Before we can go any further,
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there are a few rules about this job
35
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that we have to make clear.
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We know that you would have had--
37
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Jane and Maury both
made it crystal clear to me
38
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that this job was not to get to know Lucy,
39
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that if I thought it was
something like that,
40
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I was in the wrong place.
41
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You would be here to clean
Lucy's cage and to feed her.
42
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That is all.
43
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We cannot allow any
physical contact with Lucy
44
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such as leaning against her cage
45
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or putting fingers through the wires
46
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because she is dangerous.
47
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There wasn't any niceties
in her greeting with me.
48
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I would say she was formidable.
49
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Our little girl...
50
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will be fine.
51
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If she'd had
physical contact with me,
52
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she definitely would
have put me in my place.
53
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She would have mashed me down there.
54
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:10,000
Well,
she was born at a roadside zoo in Florida
55
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where the main attractions were chimps
56
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they trained to box with humans.
57
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Jane went down to collect her
58
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when she was only two days old.
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The mother was fed some Coca Cola,
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spiked with a strong tranquilizer
61
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and when she'd fallen into a deep sleep,
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the baby was taken from her
arms and handed to Jane...
63
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who named her Lucy.
64
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,000
They flew home on a commercial airline
65
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and covered by a blanket,
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Lucy slept the whole
way on Jane's shoulder.
67
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And once Lucy got home,
our scientific adventure began.
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Being so young, she couldn't have learned
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any animal behavior from her real mom.
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We wondered how chimp
would she turn out to be...
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...or how human.
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Would she be well-behaved or rebellious?
73
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Clever or stupid?
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What human emotions would she have?
75
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:57,000
Would she, perhaps,
be able to tell us that she loves us?
76
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:15,000
I very rarely had
contact with the Temerlins.
77
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95% of my time, when I was there,
no one was there.
78
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There was always a note
left for me on the table.
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Oh, clean this, do that,
Lucy's gonna have this for lunch.
80
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It was just a normal list that
probably a maid would have
81
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or somebody that was
taking care of your kids for you.
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Lucy had been part of
the sign language project
83
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and she had 120 words in her vocabulary.
84
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She did try communicating with me...
85
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...but my sign language
was not up to the point
86
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where I could understand.
87
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,000
Um...
88
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:10,000
I mean, I had some isolated words.
89
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You scared?
90
00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:13,000
Blanket. Hungry.
91
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:14,000
Apple. Food.
92
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Oh.
93
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But I couldn't really put them together.
94
00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,000
Um...
95
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,000
Lucy was pretty well-known
96
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,000
in the sign language world.
97
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:26,000
She was a very precise signer.
98
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:28,000
She was a little bit of a perfectionist.
99
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Okay, slow.
100
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:33,000
So when I asked her to repeat it...
101
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:37,000
...you know, she'd kinda like roll her eyes
102
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like I was really dumb.
103
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She was very arrogant.
104
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Just very, um, condescending.
105
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And then I called my major professor.
106
00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:51,000
So she's saying Lucy is cold.
107
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Lucy wants a hot cup of tea.
108
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:55,000
Oh.
109
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:07,000
Raising Lucy,
110
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we've given her every
human comfort possible.
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After eight hours' sleep
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00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:21,000
on a king-sized Beautyrest mattress,
113
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she'll have breakfast of coffee,
oatmeal with raisins
114
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:28,000
and a glass of orange Tang.
115
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:37,000
Sometimes we'll drive around town,
going to Dairy Queen
116
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:40,000
and one time, we went to a drive-in movie
117
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,000
that was playing Planet of the Apes.
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Lucy paid no attention whatsoever.
119
00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:53,000
In the evenings,
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00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:55,000
she'll sit around studying herself
121
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,000
with her favorite mirror...
122
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:01,000
...and occasionally fix a gin and tonic,
123
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:04,000
squeezing the lime with her teeth.
124
00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:16,000
Although raised human,
125
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Lucy still shows some natural behavior.
126
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:22,000
She grooms us...
127
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...the way chimps in Africa do.
128
00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:30,000
Her way of saying that we're special.
129
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:37,000
It's as important that we groom her back...
130
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,000
...solidifying the bonds between all of us.
131
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:48,000
It wasn't long before Lucy
132
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:51,000
was no longer our experimental subject...
133
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,000
...but our daughter...
134
00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:58,000
...and we were all a family.
135
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,000
On the day-to-day
basis that I saw her,
136
00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:15,000
I just accepted everything
was on Lucy's terms
137
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:18,000
and I never knew what was gonna happen.
138
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:26,000
Very gradually,
she started making movements...
139
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,000
...as if she wanted to groom me.
140
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:37,000
I knew this was a no-no.
141
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:42,000
Maury and Jane had said,
"Do not lean against there,
142
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she will grab you."
143
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:47,000
Many people who study chimps
144
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have lost joints of their fingers.
145
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:54,000
I remember thinking,
146
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,000
"Do I trust my own judgment right now,
147
00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,000
or do I do what they say?"
148
00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:11,000
I must have just decided
I was gonna go with it.
149
00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:29,000
Then when she asked me to groom her,
150
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:33,000
it was a very special moment for me...
151
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:48,000
...and had nothing to do
with theories of psychology
152
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or learning or anything.
153
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:54,000
It was our moment.
154
00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:01,000
Sure, I was cleaning up shit in the cage,
155
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:05,000
but I also was getting to know Lucy.
156
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:28,000
It was exciting me just
the little bit that I got.
157
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:38,000
I cherished it for what
it was as long as I could
158
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:43,000
because I assumed,
once Jane and Maury knew about it,
159
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I would be fired.
160
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:02,000
Dr. Temerlin's book, Lucy: Growing Up Human
161
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:04,000
is indeed, a fascinating study.
162
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:05,000
It's a definite first, isn't it, Doctor?
163
00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:08,000
I think so, never done this long,
164
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:11,000
to raise the chimp past sexual maturity,
165
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starting so early.
166
00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:16,000
Lucy, give me my glasses.
167
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,000
Lucy,
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00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:20,000
give me my glasses.
169
00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:22,000
Give me my glasses.
170
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:27,000
Hormones have changed Lucy.
171
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Leave that alone, please.
172
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:30,000
She regularly
turns our living room
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into pure chaos within minutes.
174
00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:48,000
And if she gets our keys,
175
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she can easily select the right one
176
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to open the door and escape.
177
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:53,000
Lucy, where are you going?
178
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Won't you come back in here, please?
179
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,000
One time, she was eventually
180
00:14:57,000 --> 00:15:00,000
discovered going through
the neighbor's refrigerator.
181
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,000
Come on, Lucy,
sit down here and have breakfast,
182
00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:04,000
come on.
183
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,000
Come on, Luc.
184
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,000
When Lucy comes into estrous,
185
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:11,000
when a wild chimp is ready to mate,
186
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:15,000
she shows interest in any
human male outside the family.
187
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It started affecting her social life
188
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because friends and family
189
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have become intimidated
by her size and strength.
190
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Most have stopped visiting all together.
191
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,000
We have
only a few more moments.
192
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:49,000
Why did you do this and do
you think you've missed anything
193
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as a result of concentrating so heavily,
194
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your life, your family life, with a chimp?
195
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:56,000
I think Lucy may have missed something,
196
00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:59,000
not knowing chimpanzees,
but I don't think we have.
197
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:09,000
The grooming sessions between us
198
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:12,000
became a regular event
199
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:15,000
and it was kind of a norm
for Lucy and a norm for me.
200
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:20,000
There was this overwhelming fear
201
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,000
that I was gonna have
to tell Maury and Jane
202
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:25,000
that I couldn't keep this a secret forever.
203
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:34,000
So the best thing for me to
do was be upfront and tell them.
204
00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:40,000
Maurice, there's something
205
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,000
I've been wanting to tell you about Lucy.
206
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,000
It was much easier to talk to Maury
207
00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:46,000
about what I'd done than Jane.
208
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:48,000
I mean definitely,
it wouldn't have been Jane
209
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:51,000
to discuss this with.
210
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:53,000
I'm really sorry
that this has happened
211
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:56,000
and I hope that you won't think
I've been disrespectful to you.
212
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,000
He listened to
me without interrupting,
213
00:16:58,000 --> 00:16:59,000
without saying a word.
214
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:03,000
But please don't fire me,
I really wanna keep the job.
215
00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:08,000
He said that he was surprised,
216
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:11,000
happily surprised, and then he said--
217
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:15,000
Do you wanna meet her outside the cage?
218
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:18,000
I never dreamed that
he would say something like that.
219
00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:20,000
I mean, grooming through the wire,
220
00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:23,000
that is totally different
221
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:26,000
than a face-to-face with an adult chimp.
222
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:30,000
I'll be right there,
so if anything starts to go wrong,
223
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I'll put Lucy right back into the cage.
224
00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:34,000
It'll all be fine.
225
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,000
I don't know.
226
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,000
I never thought that there was
227
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:42,000
anything positive to come of this.
228
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:44,000
I don't know.
229
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:47,000
He just talked me into it.
230
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:08,000
Maury did nothing that he
promised that he was gonna do.
231
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,000
I was scared to death.
232
00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:15,000
I couldn't breath because
her mouth was covering mine.
233
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:24,000
All I could do is pray that it
wasn't gonna go any further.
234
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:40,000
And then she sat to the side, panting,
235
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:43,000
and really frantically grooming me.
236
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:53,000
I think she was very
excited by the opportunity
237
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:57,000
for us to have full physical contact.
238
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:11,000
She was happy, she was really happy.
239
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:37,000
I became the friend from
outside of the nuclear family.
240
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,000
And she brought me in.
241
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:49,000
It was at a time in her
emotional development
242
00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:54,000
that she needed more than
just her mom and dad all the time.
243
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:13,000
One day when I went to work,
there was a note.
244
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,000
In all the months that I'd been there,
245
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:25,000
there had never been a request to see me,
never.
246
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:33,000
The last few years
have been difficult for us.
247
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:37,000
Having to put our daughter into a cage...
248
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:39,000
Maury's the
one that did the talking.
249
00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:42,000
He spoke very emotionally
250
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:45,000
about what they had been
going through with Lucy.
251
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:53,000
Fully grown,
252
00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:57,000
Lucy has become
unpredictable around strangers.
253
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:01,000
No no, no, no, no no, sit down.
254
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:03,000
Lucy, sit down.
255
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:06,000
Lucy, sit down right here.
256
00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:08,000
-Lucy--
-Lucy, sit down.
257
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:15,000
Recently,
she bit someone and threatened others.
258
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:20,000
Is this her nature, overtaking our nurture?
259
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:29,000
We no longer go anywhere
there could be people.
260
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:36,000
And she's spending more
and more time in her cage.
261
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:44,000
Growing up,
we gave Lucy a loving family home...
262
00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:50,000
...but it's now an impossible place
263
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:52,000
for her to live as an adult.
264
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:00,000
Jane and I have had to make
265
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:03,000
one of the toughest
decisions of our lives...
266
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:08,000
...to find Lucy a new home...
267
00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:14,000
...one where she doesn't
have her freedoms taken away
268
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:16,000
and can be her own person.
269
00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:23,000
It'll mean losing our daughter.
270
00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:29,000
But it's the best thing for Lucy.
271
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:39,000
They were in a predicament
of their own making
272
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:41,000
and they were fully aware of it,
273
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:44,000
but at the time that they brought Lucy home
274
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:48,000
and conceptualization of this program,
275
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:52,000
I don't think that anyone
knew the downside of it.
276
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:53,000
I know they didn't.
277
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:58,000
We've been searching all
over Europe and the U.S.
278
00:22:58,000 --> 00:23:00,000
to find her a new home,
279
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:03,000
but nothing has even come
close to being good enough.
280
00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:07,000
He recounted all the
pros and cons of each place.
281
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:09,000
Nothing was satisfactory.
282
00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:14,000
And then his whole demeanor changed.
283
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:17,000
He got a little bit of a
sparkle back in his eyes
284
00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:22,000
and he said that they
had heard about a project.
285
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:26,000
That takes chimpanzees and teaches them
286
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,000
how to live in the wild.
287
00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:33,000
And so, we're taking Lucy to Africa.
288
00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:35,000
It kind of hit me,
289
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:38,000
gee, Lucy's gonna go all the way to Africa?
290
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:41,000
And it just seemed so far-fetched
291
00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:44,000
and so out of left field.
292
00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:47,000
We're gonna go
over with her to settle her in
293
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:53,000
and we want you to come with us too.
294
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:57,000
It was a real shock to me,
a big shock to me.
295
00:23:58,000 --> 00:23:59,000
Um...
296
00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,000
I had never been to Africa.
297
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:05,000
It wasn't on my list
of places to go either.
298
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:10,000
But there was no way that I could say no.
299
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:17,000
I needed to go to give Lucy the support.
300
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:24,000
Maury and Jane were
gonna stay for two weeks,
301
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:28,000
and I would stay one week after they left.
302
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:35,000
Packing for the trip,
everything was about Lucy.
303
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:38,000
I was overloaded with dry fruit,
304
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:40,000
her mirror
305
00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:44,000
and all of her stuff was priority.
306
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:49,000
I took a couple of outfits to wear,
307
00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,000
three paperback books,
308
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:54,000
and I feel like I had a flute.
309
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:13,000
I do recall one of the
cabin attendants coming up
310
00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:15,000
and saying that people in first class
311
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:18,000
were hearing Lucy screaming.
312
00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:22,000
I think she thought that she
was enhancing our journey
313
00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:25,000
by telling us that, but I just can imagine
314
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:28,000
Maury and Jane, for sure,
would not wanna hear that.
315
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:35,000
Here, in the Gambia, West Africa,
316
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:39,000
is the Abuko Nature Reserve
where captive chimpanzees,
317
00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:44,000
both young and adult,
are being returned to the wild.
318
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,000
No one had taken a chimp
319
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:25,000
that had been born in the States
320
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:27,000
and taken it back to the wild,
321
00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:30,000
and particularly one that had been deprived
322
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:33,000
of growing up with chimpanzees.
323
00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:39,000
The hope was that she would be free,
324
00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:43,000
she would be part of a chimpanzee community
325
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:45,000
and bond with them,
326
00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:48,000
but many, many steps and many, many hazards
327
00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:52,000
between the idea and the reality of that.
328
00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:59,000
They had found an option
329
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:01,000
that they felt had high risks,
330
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:05,000
but you know, if it worked, it was paradise
331
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:07,000
and that's what they wanted for her.
332
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:11,000
And so that's the road that they took,
333
00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:14,000
but it doesn't mean that it
was an easy road for them.
334
00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:26,000
Often they couldn't speak.
335
00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:30,000
Words couldn't come
out even if they wanted to
336
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:34,000
because, you know,
the emotion was all the way up to there.
337
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:38,000
And I'm sure they were counting the days
338
00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:40,000
until the final goodbye.
339
00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:00,000
We were saying
goodbye to a daughter.
340
00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:09,000
She was a very intimate part
of our lives for over a decade.
341
00:28:12,000 --> 00:28:14,000
A long time.
342
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:23,000
Maury and I were going to leave
343
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:27,000
and we said, as we always did,
"Goodnight, Lucy."
344
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:32,000
And she said her goodnight,
345
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:36,000
which was a lovely low, soft panting.
346
00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:40,000
It was a loving goodbye, it was.
347
00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:44,000
She didn't realize she
wouldn't see us in the morning,
348
00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:45,000
but we did.
349
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:52,000
I can still hear that.
350
00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:19,000
Lucy had a million physical reasons
351
00:29:19,000 --> 00:29:20,000
for being depressed
352
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:23,000
and then she had the whopping emotional one
353
00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:26,000
of, "What in the world am I doing here?"
354
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:31,000
"What is this about,
where is Maury and Jane?"
355
00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:36,000
And I had no way to explain this to Lucy.
356
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:48,000
So, I mean, why act like life is great?
357
00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:49,000
It wasn't for her.
358
00:29:57,000 --> 00:29:59,000
She didn't have any friends,
359
00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:01,000
she was clearly dependent on me.
360
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:08,000
So I extended by two weeks...
361
00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:14,000
...and still, she was not giving indicators
362
00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:19,000
that we were even moving
in the right direction on this.
363
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:26,000
Not long after that, I remember...
364
00:30:28,000 --> 00:30:32,000
...setting my last
extension to three months.
365
00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:40,000
After that, I really had to get moving
366
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:43,000
with my own life's plans because
367
00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:46,000
I had an assistantship at the university,
I was teaching.
368
00:30:46,000 --> 00:30:49,000
I had a dog.
369
00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:51,000
I had a boyfriend.
370
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:55,000
So that was to be the final decision.
371
00:30:57,000 --> 00:31:02,000
Not long after that,
finances became an issue.
372
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:06,000
And I moved from the hotel...
373
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:13,000
...into a tree house in
the Abuko Nature Reserve.
374
00:31:23,000 --> 00:31:25,000
I think everyone had the expectation
375
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:28,000
that I knew what I was getting myself into
376
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:32,000
and that I had experience.
377
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:40,000
But I didn't know anything.
378
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:50,000
I don't think I ever really
used matches before
379
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,000
that I can remember.
380
00:31:53,000 --> 00:31:55,000
Everything was always electricity.
381
00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:00,000
A lot of things that I
didn't even think about
382
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:03,000
until I was presented with a situation.
383
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:10,000
It never even occurred to
me that there was no water.
384
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:17,000
But the strong point was,
385
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:20,000
I was gonna be 100 meters away from Lucy...
386
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:26,000
...and I could be going
back and forth at great ease.
387
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:34,000
She lost tremendous amounts of weight,
388
00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:37,000
mostly because of parasites,
389
00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:41,000
and started to lose patches of hair.
390
00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:43,000
I think a lot of it had to do with
391
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:47,000
the unfamiliarity of the
food and the climate.
392
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:51,000
She was just like barely hanging on.
393
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:56,000
Lucy only had me and her memories.
394
00:32:56,000 --> 00:33:00,000
So I tried to stay with
her as long as I could.
395
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:05,000
And we would play these little games
396
00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:08,000
where I would go Lucy's nose, Janis' nose,
397
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:12,000
Lucy's ear, Janis' ear, and you know,
398
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:16,000
she would sit there very in
tune with what I was doing
399
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:20,000
and concentrating like it was
the most important thing to her.
400
00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:32,000
And I became the focal
point for her social contact
401
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:35,000
and she was, for me.
402
00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:44,000
I think that we began to know each other
403
00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:46,000
as people during that era.
404
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:53,000
There was no more chimpanzee, human...
405
00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:56,000
...it was Janis and Lucy.
406
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:01,000
It was clear, at that point,
407
00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:04,000
this is gonna be a much longer,
408
00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:08,000
much more difficult task
than any of us imagined.
409
00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:15,000
A growing understanding
of what I'm asking of her...
410
00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:21,000
...to give up her life in the States
411
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:24,000
and the path that she was on
412
00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:26,000
and stay there under those circumstances.
413
00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:31,000
I pleaded with her to come back.
414
00:34:35,000 --> 00:34:37,000
But she was steadfast.
415
00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:41,000
She wouldn't do it.
416
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:56,000
I wasn't even aware
417
00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:59,000
of the depth of my feeling for Lucy
418
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:01,000
until I was faced with the question,
419
00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:06,000
was I able to leave her
in that kind of a situation?
420
00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:10,000
Or did I have an allegiance
421
00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:13,000
to my love for her to stay with her?
422
00:35:16,000 --> 00:35:18,000
Which, that's what I decided to do.
423
00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:46,000
Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom.
424
00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:50,000
Our special report today
takes us to the Gambia
425
00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:53,000
where the fundamental elements of survival,
426
00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:55,000
which were never learned by these chimps,
427
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:57,000
are being taught to them now
428
00:35:57,000 --> 00:36:02,000
in a very comprehensive
program by Janis Carter.
429
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:18,000
They must be taught the essential skills
430
00:36:18,000 --> 00:36:21,000
such as how to find food and water,
431
00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:23,000
how to recognize and avoid predators,
432
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:27,000
and even how to communicate
with another chimpanzee.
433
00:36:33,000 --> 00:36:38,000
I wasn't a professional,
nobody had taught me how to do it.
434
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:42,000
It was just trial and error,
435
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:45,000
learning whatever I thought
a chimp would have done,
436
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,000
I would try to do that myself.
437
00:36:56,000 --> 00:36:59,000
Already,
Dash has reacted to my food grunting
438
00:36:59,000 --> 00:37:02,000
and has accepted the
idea of this new food source.
439
00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:10,000
When I took the smaller chimps out,
440
00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:11,000
I would take a bag with me
441
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:14,000
and I would collect extra
442
00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:17,000
and I would take it back for Lucy.
443
00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:19,000
She couldn't go out of the cage
444
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:23,000
because she was much too
large and potentially dangerous.
445
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:26,000
And tourists walked through this reserve.
446
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:32,000
The idea was,
it would be a gradual transition
447
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:35,000
from a diet that she was
familiar with and that she liked
448
00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:38,000
to a diet that she would
be eating in the wild.
449
00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:43,000
Mm.
450
00:37:43,000 --> 00:37:46,000
But even with me eating it,
451
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:49,000
and giving really exaggerated food grunts
452
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:51,000
like I just loved it...
453
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:55,000
...she would pretend like it wasn't there.
454
00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:06,000
She just wasn't willing to try and
455
00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:10,000
my concerns that, you know,
the next stage was gonna be
456
00:38:10,000 --> 00:38:14,000
the real world for Lucy and
what was that going to be like
457
00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:18,000
if she couldn't even adjust at this stage.
458
00:38:58,000 --> 00:39:02,000
I knew that this was the
next step in the whole process,
459
00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:05,000
but I really loved Abuko.
460
00:39:08,000 --> 00:39:13,000
I couldn't imagine leaving
this beautiful Garden of Eden
461
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:17,000
to go up to this wild area.
462
00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:20,000
It frightened me, it really did scare me.
463
00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:28,000
While the majority of
the journey is by Land Rover,
464
00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:31,000
the final stage is by boat,
handled by the director of
465
00:39:31,000 --> 00:39:35,000
Gambia's Wildlife Conservation Department,
Eddie Brewer.
466
00:40:18,000 --> 00:40:21,000
I was dropped off, alone,
467
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:24,000
and initially, I didn't even have a boat...
468
00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:28,000
...and not a radio, nothing.
469
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:32,000
I felt abandoned then.
470
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:41,000
But I couldn't really show
this in front of the chimps
471
00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:43,000
because I was supposed to be the brave one
472
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:45,000
and I was the leader,
473
00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:48,000
but I did not know what we were doing.
474
00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:57,000
We were gonna be in a
world that we didn't know...
475
00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:03,000
...that we had to begin
to get to know together.
476
00:41:10,000 --> 00:41:14,000
There's always something
spiritual about a forest.
477
00:41:14,000 --> 00:41:18,000
Sometimes my skin gets kind of tingly,
478
00:41:18,000 --> 00:41:21,000
depending on what I'm walking through.
479
00:41:23,000 --> 00:41:28,000
The periphery of the
island was gallery forest.
480
00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:36,000
Then there was woodland
savanna and the interior was swamp.
481
00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:46,000
I had snakes around me all the time,
482
00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:50,000
a lot of cobras and puff adders.
483
00:41:56,000 --> 00:41:59,000
There were hippos and there were hyenas
484
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:00,000
on the island as well.
485
00:42:04,000 --> 00:42:08,000
Well, I don't think anyone
told me about the leopards.
486
00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:15,000
I had a cage that had been constructed
487
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:17,000
by the British Army.
488
00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:23,000
It wasn't for me to be
protected from the environment,
489
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:27,000
it was so that my things could
be protected from the chimps.
490
00:42:38,000 --> 00:42:40,000
In the beginning, it was a bed,
491
00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:42,000
a mosquito net,
492
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:46,000
the gas burner for
heating water and cooking,
493
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:47,000
which I rarely did.
494
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:58,000
It didn't occur to me that I
should have filtered water.
495
00:43:01,000 --> 00:43:04,000
I would just take water
from the river and then
496
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:06,000
the dirt would settle down to the bottom
497
00:43:06,000 --> 00:43:08,000
and that's what I drank.
498
00:43:13,000 --> 00:43:16,000
One time was a rat
499
00:43:16,000 --> 00:43:19,000
and I had been drinking out of that bucket.
500
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:32,000
At night, the chimps,
they were going to sleep outside,
501
00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:34,000
I was going to sleep inside.
502
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:51,000
But they wanted to be as close
as they possibly could to me,
503
00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:55,000
so they slept on the roof,
just above my bed.
504
00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:15,000
For all of us,
there were a lot of vocalizations
505
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:18,000
that we hadn't heard in Abuko.
506
00:44:23,000 --> 00:44:26,000
Every time there was some foreign sound
507
00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:28,000
that woke them up,
508
00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:32,000
they would immediately urinate or defecate.
509
00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:37,000
And it would come down on my bed.
510
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:38,000
There was no way that I could stop them.
511
00:44:38,000 --> 00:44:43,000
I just had to accept that this
is the way it was going to be.
512
00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:54,000
I did think to myself,
"Jesus, what am I doing?"
513
00:45:08,000 --> 00:45:12,000
I did advertise for somebody
to come to work for me.
514
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:18,000
And a couple of people answered.
515
00:45:20,000 --> 00:45:24,000
Neither one of the people
ever even got out of the boat
516
00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:26,000
on the jetty, the chimps just went nuts.
517
00:45:31,000 --> 00:45:34,000
This was a stranger to our little world
518
00:45:34,000 --> 00:45:37,000
and they didn't want anyone there at all.
519
00:45:41,000 --> 00:45:45,000
That left me alone,
520
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:47,000
completely alone with them.
521
00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:55,000
There was no one that could
kinda take over in my absence.
522
00:45:57,000 --> 00:46:00,000
There was no way that I could
even think about going away
523
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:02,000
for an extended period of time.
524
00:46:25,000 --> 00:46:28,000
It was emotionally difficult.
525
00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:41,000
I suppose part of what made it harder
526
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:46,000
was that I didn't have
anyone to confer with.
527
00:46:49,000 --> 00:46:51,000
Everything was on me and my gut.
528
00:46:55,000 --> 00:46:59,000
In terms of written communication,
529
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:04,000
it could be six months
before I would get a response
530
00:47:04,000 --> 00:47:09,000
with the feedback from someone
to reassure me that, "Yes,
531
00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:11,000
you're doing the right thing."
532
00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:20,000
She was clear about the struggles.
533
00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:23,000
She was clear about how hard it was.
534
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:27,000
You know,
waiting for every letter from her.
535
00:47:27,000 --> 00:47:30,000
What's going to be next?
536
00:47:30,000 --> 00:47:33,000
Is Lucy gonna be hurt?
Is Lucy gonna be sick?
537
00:47:34,000 --> 00:47:36,000
How about Janis,
538
00:47:36,000 --> 00:47:38,000
is she going to be overwhelmed
by what she's dealing with?
539
00:47:40,000 --> 00:47:45,000
I worried about her health
and her well-being every day,
540
00:47:45,000 --> 00:47:46,000
every day.
541
00:48:12,000 --> 00:48:13,000
The others were okay.
542
00:48:13,000 --> 00:48:15,000
I knew that they would make it.
543
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:22,000
They would forage,
they would go off together.
544
00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:31,000
But Lucy was a different case altogether.
545
00:48:38,000 --> 00:48:44,000
Well, Lucy's smart enough to
respond to modeling behavior
546
00:48:44,000 --> 00:48:47,000
and she knew what I was trying to do.
547
00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:51,000
Lucy,
548
00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:53,000
food, get.
549
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:57,000
She just wasn't gonna bend an inch,
550
00:48:57,000 --> 00:49:00,000
it seemed like, and forage for herself.
551
00:49:00,000 --> 00:49:04,000
Lucy, food, get.
552
00:49:04,000 --> 00:49:09,000
Her accepting that wild fruits and leaves
553
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:11,000
were going to be a major part of her diet
554
00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:13,000
was really important.
555
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:18,000
Lucy, food, get.
556
00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:21,000
She needed to do this in order to survive
557
00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:24,000
and in order for me to leave.
558
00:49:24,000 --> 00:49:28,000
Lucy, food, get.
559
00:49:28,000 --> 00:49:30,000
Where I really began to ponder...
560
00:49:30,000 --> 00:49:33,000
Lucy, food, get.
561
00:49:33,000 --> 00:49:36,000
...we've gotta find some
other kind of option for Lucy.
562
00:49:36,000 --> 00:49:37,000
This isn't gonna work.
563
00:49:42,000 --> 00:49:43,000
I wrote to the Temerlins, saying that,
564
00:49:43,000 --> 00:49:47,000
you know, she just won't,
she won't do this.
565
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:50,000
She's just,
I don't know what we're gonna do about it.
566
00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:59,000
And do you think,
in the back of your mind,
567
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:01,000
you're thinking, "I've come all this way,
568
00:50:01,000 --> 00:50:04,000
I've given up everything for you
569
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:05,000
and you're not doing what--"
570
00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:09,000
I never thought,
it never went through my head,
571
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:11,000
"You owe me.
572
00:50:11,000 --> 00:50:13,000
I've given everything up."
573
00:50:13,000 --> 00:50:16,000
That idea never went
through my head at all,
574
00:50:16,000 --> 00:50:17,000
through any of it.
575
00:50:21,000 --> 00:50:23,000
I knew that she could do it
576
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:27,000
and I just couldn't figure out
577
00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:30,000
why she wouldn't just give in and do it.
578
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:35,000
And this went on and on and on.
579
00:50:41,000 --> 00:50:43,000
Lucy, eat the food!
580
00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:45,000
Understand!
581
00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:49,000
Lucy, eat food.
582
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:51,000
This particular day,
583
00:50:51,000 --> 00:50:54,000
I had gotten angry at
her and yelled at her.
584
00:50:55,000 --> 00:50:57,000
Lucy, eat food!
585
00:50:57,000 --> 00:51:01,000
I probably expressed exasperation
586
00:51:01,000 --> 00:51:03,000
like I had never expressed it before.
587
00:51:03,000 --> 00:51:05,000
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
588
00:51:05,000 --> 00:51:06,000
I'm not even gonna try anymore,
589
00:51:06,000 --> 00:51:08,000
just forget it.
590
00:51:08,000 --> 00:51:10,000
Lucy, eat food!
591
00:51:18,000 --> 00:51:20,000
I don't know if I just passed out
592
00:51:20,000 --> 00:51:22,000
or if I actually went to sleep.
593
00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:30,000
But when I woke up, the world had changed.
594
00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:49,000
She was eating leaves.
595
00:51:52,000 --> 00:51:53,000
Lucy knew me very well.
596
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:57,000
She was very sensitive to people's moods.
597
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:03,000
It's possible that she understood
598
00:52:03,000 --> 00:52:06,000
I had reached my limit that day.
599
00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:13,000
It was, perhaps, a breaking point for her
600
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:15,000
that she finally had to give in.
601
00:52:22,000 --> 00:52:24,000
It was an immense relief.
602
00:52:26,000 --> 00:52:30,000
I had lost hope,
but it really gave me hope.
603
00:52:34,000 --> 00:52:36,000
It strikes me
604
00:52:36,000 --> 00:52:39,000
that relief was the turning point.
605
00:52:39,000 --> 00:52:41,000
But it was only on the feeding front,
606
00:52:41,000 --> 00:52:43,000
it wasn't on anything else.
607
00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:52,000
Even if Lucy acquired her foraging skills,
608
00:52:52,000 --> 00:52:55,000
she couldn't have survived
on the island totally alone.
609
00:53:01,000 --> 00:53:04,000
She had to integrate socially
610
00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:07,000
with the rest of the chimps.
611
00:53:07,000 --> 00:53:11,000
But she wanted all of her emotional needs
612
00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:17,000
and social needs met by
me and it prevented her
613
00:53:17,000 --> 00:53:19,000
from interacting with
anyone else in the group.
614
00:53:28,000 --> 00:53:32,000
So I had to withdraw for her to feel empty
615
00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:36,000
to the point that she would
look to somebody else
616
00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:38,000
to fulfill those needs.
617
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:52,000
I knew how it was impacting on Lucy,
618
00:53:52,000 --> 00:53:55,000
that she was feeling ignored and left out
619
00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:58,000
and forgotten and unloved.
620
00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:11,000
But if I gave in,
621
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:16,000
she wouldn't be able to
realize what we had all hoped
622
00:54:16,000 --> 00:54:19,000
that she would,
which was to be independent,
623
00:54:19,000 --> 00:54:22,000
free and have choice.
624
00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:40,000
I had been so afraid to go to the island,
625
00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:45,000
but the longer that I stayed,
the less I wanted to leave.
626
00:54:47,000 --> 00:54:51,000
It was the perfect
paradise that I was so lucky
627
00:54:51,000 --> 00:54:53,000
to have found that.
628
00:54:58,000 --> 00:55:01,000
But it was a different kind of paradise.
629
00:55:08,000 --> 00:55:12,000
There were some unusual
things that happened at night.
630
00:55:43,000 --> 00:55:45,000
I would see a light.
631
00:55:48,000 --> 00:55:51,000
It would go back and forth and back.
632
00:55:57,000 --> 00:56:00,000
I could feel this really strong pull,
633
00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:03,000
trying to pull me into it.
634
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:24,000
And it always happened the same way,
just like that.
635
00:56:28,000 --> 00:56:31,000
I believe that there were spirits
636
00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:34,000
that were taking care
of me when I was there
637
00:56:34,000 --> 00:56:39,000
and that's why I
survived it all those years.
638
00:56:40,000 --> 00:56:41,000
I was never harmed.
639
00:56:46,000 --> 00:56:48,000
I suppose those are the layers of mystery
640
00:56:48,000 --> 00:56:54,000
that really enhanced
how I feel about the island.
641
00:57:02,000 --> 00:57:04,000
I tried to keep a balance
642
00:57:04,000 --> 00:57:07,000
between communicating
with the outside world
643
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:09,000
and living a life that I was on the island.
644
00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:13,000
But it was very difficult.
645
00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:22,000
I would read letters with great excitement
646
00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:25,000
and be happy with it.
647
00:57:34,000 --> 00:57:38,000
And then in a very short period of time,
648
00:57:38,000 --> 00:57:41,000
it was like some sentence
was kinda highlighted,
649
00:57:41,000 --> 00:57:46,000
going across my brain,
what's this mean?
650
00:57:47,000 --> 00:57:50,000
"Maybe now we can start thinking about
651
00:57:51,000 --> 00:57:52,000
returning to your life back here."
652
00:57:56,000 --> 00:57:59,000
Could it mean this? Could it mean that?
653
00:57:59,000 --> 00:58:00,000
And I was really preoccupied with it.
654
00:58:07,000 --> 00:58:11,000
It was actually making me unbalanced.
655
00:58:11,000 --> 00:58:14,000
"Back here now."
656
00:58:17,000 --> 00:58:21,000
There was just no way that
I could be totally immersed
657
00:58:21,000 --> 00:58:23,000
in this world with the chimps
658
00:58:23,000 --> 00:58:28,000
and also immersed in a human world.
659
00:58:28,000 --> 00:58:31,000
I couldn't live in both worlds.
660
00:58:39,000 --> 00:58:42,000
I just gradually drifted away
661
00:58:42,000 --> 00:58:46,000
from family and friends.
662
00:58:47,000 --> 00:58:49,000
I stopped writing
663
00:58:49,000 --> 00:58:52,000
and I stopped receiving letters as well.
664
00:59:28,000 --> 00:59:30,000
I don't remember being lonely.
665
00:59:33,000 --> 00:59:37,000
I remember sometimes
feeling like I had too much
666
00:59:37,000 --> 00:59:40,000
human stimuli from the
chimps and I would just scream,
667
00:59:40,000 --> 00:59:43,000
"Can't you just leave
me alone for a minute?"
668
00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:49,000
They fulfilled all those human needs
669
00:59:50,000 --> 00:59:52,000
that I had for social contact.
670
00:59:58,000 --> 01:00:03,000
Lucy and I had more of a friendship.
671
01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:08,000
My feelings for Dash...
672
01:00:10,000 --> 01:00:16,000
...it was more
mother-offspring type of feeling.
673
01:00:19,000 --> 01:00:22,000
He manipulated me,
just like all little boys do
674
01:00:22,000 --> 01:00:24,000
with their mothers.
675
01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:27,000
Especially if they're an only child.
676
01:00:29,000 --> 01:00:32,000
But we just loved each other's company.
677
01:00:39,000 --> 01:00:40,000
So you were sort of
678
01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:43,000
reaching another level of being with them.
679
01:00:43,000 --> 01:00:45,000
Were you, essentially, one of them?
680
01:00:50,000 --> 01:00:52,000
I don't know, I don't...
681
01:00:52,000 --> 01:00:55,000
I don't know if I ever became
682
01:00:55,000 --> 01:00:57,000
a chimp, so to speak.
683
01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:06,000
But I do think that our personalities
684
01:01:06,000 --> 01:01:12,000
and our cultural
tendencies all met together
685
01:01:12,000 --> 01:01:15,000
at some point and we were just who we were.
686
01:01:20,000 --> 01:01:24,000
And things changed for Lucy as well.
687
01:01:30,000 --> 01:01:35,000
She developed a different
kind of aura about herself,
688
01:01:35,000 --> 01:01:37,000
one that was more peaceful.
689
01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:43,000
She didn't have patches
of hair missing anymore
690
01:01:43,000 --> 01:01:47,000
and she didn't express such neediness
691
01:01:47,000 --> 01:01:49,000
as she had in the early years.
692
01:01:52,000 --> 01:01:55,000
She could go out and forage
with the group without me.
693
01:01:55,000 --> 01:01:58,000
She interacted with the other chimps.
694
01:02:04,000 --> 01:02:08,000
I just thought of us as beings,
695
01:02:08,000 --> 01:02:12,000
that it was Dash and Janis
696
01:02:12,000 --> 01:02:16,000
and Lucy and Lakey,
697
01:02:16,000 --> 01:02:20,000
not Janis with a group of chimps.
698
01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:24,000
And we were on a mission.
699
01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:38,000
I learned a lot more about families...
700
01:02:41,000 --> 01:02:43,000
...living with the
chimps than I think I did
701
01:02:43,000 --> 01:02:46,000
with my own human family.
702
01:02:56,000 --> 01:03:00,000
Sunset was a really
important moment of reflection
703
01:03:00,000 --> 01:03:02,000
for all of us.
704
01:03:03,000 --> 01:03:07,000
You know,
we would always go out on the jetty.
705
01:03:15,000 --> 01:03:18,000
No matter who was mad at who during the day
706
01:03:18,000 --> 01:03:21,000
or who had bitten who or was
holding a grudge or whatever,
707
01:03:21,000 --> 01:03:26,000
it all washed away as the sun went down.
708
01:03:31,000 --> 01:03:35,000
And we'd hang our hands in the river.
709
01:03:39,000 --> 01:03:41,000
I don't know why that makes me emotional.
710
01:03:52,000 --> 01:03:54,000
It just seemed...
711
01:03:56,000 --> 01:03:58,000
...so genuine.
712
01:03:58,000 --> 01:04:03,000
Every second of it was just
so genuine and we were...
713
01:04:03,000 --> 01:04:06,000
appreciative of what
life had given us that day.
714
01:04:17,000 --> 01:04:22,000
Feeling that all of these
vile forces of civilization
715
01:04:22,000 --> 01:04:25,000
just did not impact us.
716
01:04:27,000 --> 01:04:28,000
It was...
717
01:04:29,000 --> 01:04:31,000
...just us.
718
01:04:45,000 --> 01:04:49,000
I didn't think about
going back at that point.
719
01:04:56,000 --> 01:04:59,000
Time had a different schedule for me then.
720
01:05:02,000 --> 01:05:05,000
I mean, I would have indicators of seasons
721
01:05:05,000 --> 01:05:09,000
by the date palm putting out its new fruits
722
01:05:09,000 --> 01:05:12,000
and you know that a whole year has passed.
723
01:05:14,000 --> 01:05:16,000
I was...
724
01:05:16,000 --> 01:05:19,000
I suppose you call it living in the moment,
don't you?
725
01:05:19,000 --> 01:05:20,000
I was living in the moment.
726
01:05:39,000 --> 01:05:42,000
This particular day, it was a hot day.
727
01:05:46,000 --> 01:05:48,000
We were all walking the forest.
728
01:05:51,000 --> 01:05:55,000
And I was in the back and I
probably wasn't even thinking
729
01:05:55,000 --> 01:05:57,000
about what I was doing.
730
01:06:00,000 --> 01:06:05,000
I suddenly heard everybody
scream and scatter.
731
01:06:07,000 --> 01:06:11,000
And there was Dash, he had his hair up.
732
01:06:11,000 --> 01:06:15,000
He was all pumped up and he
was like bouncing on his toes.
733
01:06:15,000 --> 01:06:18,000
I was gonna get it that day.
734
01:06:23,000 --> 01:06:25,000
I was the leader in the beginning.
735
01:06:27,000 --> 01:06:28,000
He was young when we first went there,
736
01:06:28,000 --> 01:06:31,000
but he respected the dominance hierarchy.
737
01:06:33,000 --> 01:06:35,000
But he was the oldest male,
738
01:06:35,000 --> 01:06:38,000
so it was inevitable that
he was going to be the one
739
01:06:38,000 --> 01:06:41,000
that was gonna take over
leadership of the group.
740
01:06:46,000 --> 01:06:47,000
But for some reason,
741
01:06:47,000 --> 01:06:50,000
I never thought that this was gonna happen.
742
01:06:55,000 --> 01:06:59,000
I just stood there and he charged me.
743
01:06:59,000 --> 01:07:01,000
This is it.
744
01:07:06,000 --> 01:07:08,000
He grabbed my leg.
745
01:07:11,000 --> 01:07:15,000
And he just dragged me
everywhere he was going.
746
01:07:20,000 --> 01:07:23,000
And then he dragged me
through this thorn bush,
747
01:07:23,000 --> 01:07:25,000
and my body got caught.
748
01:08:11,000 --> 01:08:15,000
I was no longer the leader,
I was number two,
749
01:08:15,000 --> 01:08:18,000
but a number two that
wasn't gonna be tolerated.
750
01:08:21,000 --> 01:08:25,000
Dash would have
slammed me if I tried to stay.
751
01:08:26,000 --> 01:08:28,000
This was his place now.
752
01:08:46,000 --> 01:08:50,000
It was very strange, leaving the island.
753
01:08:52,000 --> 01:08:55,000
I wanted the feeling that
I was a part of something
754
01:08:55,000 --> 01:08:56,000
and I didn't have it.
755
01:08:58,000 --> 01:09:00,000
I really missed the fullness of my life
756
01:09:00,000 --> 01:09:06,000
and kind of purpose
that I felt when I woke up.
757
01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:15,000
She had a hard time adjusting.
758
01:09:17,000 --> 01:09:18,000
How do you go back to living
759
01:09:18,000 --> 01:09:21,000
primarily in a world of human beings?
760
01:09:24,000 --> 01:09:27,000
And you're having to live an everyday life,
761
01:09:27,000 --> 01:09:30,000
negotiating human structures,
762
01:09:30,000 --> 01:09:35,000
human customs, human food.
763
01:09:39,000 --> 01:09:43,000
It was incredibly stressful for her.
764
01:10:00,000 --> 01:10:03,000
I knew that she was getting better,
765
01:10:03,000 --> 01:10:04,000
but there was still this,
766
01:10:04,000 --> 01:10:09,000
the overall concern on my
part that Lucy was not going to
767
01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:12,000
be able to survive without me there
768
01:10:12,000 --> 01:10:16,000
kind of orchestrating or
monitoring what was going on.
769
01:10:48,000 --> 01:10:51,000
I took some of her human objects
770
01:10:52,000 --> 01:10:54,000
that had been so important to her before.
771
01:10:54,000 --> 01:10:56,000
She picked them up, looked at them
772
01:10:56,000 --> 01:10:58,000
and put them back down again.
773
01:10:59,000 --> 01:11:02,000
Nothing that had been
important to her before,
774
01:11:02,000 --> 01:11:08,000
that mirror was just like
her very favorite object,
775
01:11:08,000 --> 01:11:09,000
it meant nothing.
776
01:11:14,000 --> 01:11:18,000
After that, we groomed each
other and talked a little bit.
777
01:11:24,000 --> 01:11:26,000
And then she suddenly,
778
01:11:27,000 --> 01:11:30,000
um, really without any indication,
grabbed me...
779
01:11:35,000 --> 01:11:39,000
...and just pulled me really tight.
780
01:11:45,000 --> 01:11:47,000
It was very intense,
781
01:11:47,000 --> 01:11:50,000
it was not like any other
embrace we had ever had.
782
01:12:00,000 --> 01:12:04,000
It signified the life that
we had shared together.
783
01:12:22,000 --> 01:12:24,000
At the end of it,
784
01:12:25,000 --> 01:12:28,000
she just got up, turned around
785
01:12:28,000 --> 01:12:30,000
and walked back to the other chimps.
786
01:12:33,000 --> 01:12:38,000
I was really, really surprised
787
01:12:38,000 --> 01:12:41,000
that she initiated the separation.
788
01:12:44,000 --> 01:12:48,000
Honestly, it had been so hard for so long,
789
01:12:48,000 --> 01:12:52,000
I just never thought that she
would walk away from me.
790
01:12:55,000 --> 01:12:58,000
But Lucy had finally made it.
791
01:13:00,000 --> 01:13:05,000
She was comfortable within herself
792
01:13:05,000 --> 01:13:07,000
and that she was in
control of her own life,
793
01:13:07,000 --> 01:13:10,000
which is what we'd all wanted.
794
01:13:22,000 --> 01:13:24,000
Lucy still loved me,
that was very, very clear,
795
01:13:24,000 --> 01:13:27,000
but she didn't need me
in the way that she had
796
01:13:27,000 --> 01:13:29,000
for so many years.
797
01:13:36,000 --> 01:13:39,000
Eventually, I felt comfortable enough
798
01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:42,000
to take my first real vacation,
799
01:13:42,000 --> 01:13:45,000
leaving Lucy behind in her new life.
800
01:13:48,000 --> 01:13:50,000
I always had wanted to go to Bali.
801
01:14:02,000 --> 01:14:06,000
I had this dream one night
802
01:14:06,000 --> 01:14:11,000
about Lucy getting on an airplane
803
01:14:11,000 --> 01:14:14,000
and she had a bag with her
804
01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:17,000
and she was going up
the ladder of the plane.
805
01:14:24,000 --> 01:14:25,000
I knew that she...
806
01:14:27,000 --> 01:14:28,000
...she was dead.
807
01:14:47,000 --> 01:14:49,000
There was no indication
808
01:14:49,000 --> 01:14:52,000
of what might have been the cause of death.
809
01:14:54,000 --> 01:14:56,000
But the more that we talked about it,
810
01:14:56,000 --> 01:15:00,000
the more it just remains a
mystery what happened to her.
811
01:15:03,000 --> 01:15:06,000
I wanted her buried on the island.
812
01:15:08,000 --> 01:15:10,000
So she's there on the island.
813
01:15:17,000 --> 01:15:18,000
That's the right place
814
01:15:18,000 --> 01:15:21,000
for her to be, though, isn't it?
815
01:15:21,000 --> 01:15:22,000
Yeah.
816
01:15:27,000 --> 01:15:28,000
That was her final home.
817
01:15:45,000 --> 01:15:48,000
I was always just waiting.
818
01:15:48,000 --> 01:15:49,000
When were we gonna get the call?
819
01:15:52,000 --> 01:15:57,000
And it was a very,
very difficult thing to hear.
820
01:15:59,000 --> 01:16:02,000
It was a terrible loss for all of us.
821
01:16:08,000 --> 01:16:11,000
I was so grateful to Janis
822
01:16:11,000 --> 01:16:17,000
for giving Lucy this chance
after her time with us.
823
01:16:21,000 --> 01:16:23,000
She had some really good years.
824
01:16:25,000 --> 01:16:29,000
And she had freedom
and she wasn't in a cage.
825
01:16:31,000 --> 01:16:33,000
She was protected, she was loved.
826
01:16:33,000 --> 01:16:34,000
She had Janis.
827
01:16:37,000 --> 01:16:38,000
But I wouldn't take a chimp
828
01:16:38,000 --> 01:16:41,000
from its chimpanzee mother again.
829
01:16:44,000 --> 01:16:49,000
Lucy's death had a certain finality
830
01:16:49,000 --> 01:16:52,000
to the rest of what I
was doing with my life.
831
01:16:58,000 --> 01:17:02,000
I did go through a lot of thinking
832
01:17:02,000 --> 01:17:05,000
as to whether I had achieved everything
833
01:17:05,000 --> 01:17:06,000
that I had set out to do.
834
01:17:06,000 --> 01:17:11,000
Was it time to start thinking
about returning to the U.S.?
835
01:17:14,000 --> 01:17:16,000
Do I need to be here anymore?
836
01:17:50,000 --> 01:17:52,000
For years, after I left the island,
837
01:17:52,000 --> 01:17:57,000
I used to have a ritual of
watching the sun go down.
838
01:18:01,000 --> 01:18:04,000
It didn't really matter where I was.
839
01:18:07,000 --> 01:18:09,000
It was a sacred moment.
840
01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:19,000
I guess that was the beauty
of that period of my life
841
01:18:19,000 --> 01:18:21,000
was that I did have that feeling.
842
01:18:25,000 --> 01:18:27,000
I mean, how often do you get a chance
843
01:18:27,000 --> 01:18:29,000
to live like that today?
64074
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