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Antarctica...
icy graveyard of hubris,
2
00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:06,520
not hostile to humanity,
3
00:00:06,550 --> 00:00:08,620
but worse...
utterly indifferent,
4
00:00:08,650 --> 00:00:11,420
a blank wall at the edge
of the universe,
5
00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:14,170
defying us to find meaning in it.
6
00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:17,970
So you can see why
I'm not going.
7
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:20,970
For God's... the antenna
at McMurdo Station is down.
8
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:24,285
All we've heard is a garbled
transmission about a murder,
9
00:00:24,286 --> 00:00:27,270
and two days ago,
we detected an unidentified...
10
00:00:27,300 --> 00:00:28,640
Really?
11
00:00:28,670 --> 00:00:30,070
- You need a pickleback?
- Do you?
12
00:00:30,100 --> 00:00:31,270
- I...
- We're as concerned
13
00:00:31,300 --> 00:00:33,640
about McMurdo
as the average citizen is,
14
00:00:33,670 --> 00:00:35,600
but we run a business.
15
00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:37,170
Obviously,
we're extremely concerned
16
00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:38,740
- about the consequences.
- Are you?
17
00:00:38,770 --> 00:00:41,170
The death of everyone
on Antarctica,
18
00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:44,000
the loss of research
that may save the planet,
19
00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:45,500
and a flaw in the ice cap
20
00:00:45,540 --> 00:00:47,570
that could doom us
in the short-term?
21
00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:51,670
Sure, those, but does this
look like a nonprofit?
22
00:00:51,700 --> 00:00:55,340
Yeah, one that distributes
liquor to needy child-men.
23
00:00:55,370 --> 00:00:57,370
Hey!
It happens to be man-child!
24
00:00:57,400 --> 00:00:59,100
And now I'm craving a pickleback,
25
00:00:59,140 --> 00:01:01,670
- so thanks for that.
- For the last few years,
26
00:01:01,700 --> 00:01:05,040
this organization
had a newfound reputation
27
00:01:05,070 --> 00:01:09,070
for effectiveness and ethical conduct.
What happened?
28
00:01:09,100 --> 00:01:11,470
Uh, I woke up,
and we got awesome again.
29
00:01:11,500 --> 00:01:14,970
Jesus, Lana,
how far you've fallen.
30
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:17,270
- Uh, I'm sorry?
- Some history here?
31
00:01:17,300 --> 00:01:18,740
I honestly have no idea
what's happening right now.
32
00:01:18,770 --> 00:01:21,140
Oh, please. It's Sandra.
33
00:01:21,170 --> 00:01:24,540
You were the star of the
environmental science department,
34
00:01:24,570 --> 00:01:26,570
sucking up all the grants
and funding
35
00:01:26,600 --> 00:01:29,400
like a selfish vampire,
then skipping out,
36
00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:32,240
leaving our department
blacklisted for grants
37
00:01:32,270 --> 00:01:37,570
- for the next five years.
- Oh. Grad school Sandra.
38
00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,500
Yeah, I still don't know
who you are.
39
00:01:39,540 --> 00:01:41,570
Oof.
Nothing worse than a nemesis
40
00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:43,100
who doesn't know you exist...
41
00:01:43,140 --> 00:01:45,140
like playing air guitar
with your entire life.
42
00:01:45,170 --> 00:01:48,200
Why don't you all take a deep breath?
43
00:01:48,240 --> 00:01:50,370
There's wonderful oxygen
right outside my office.
44
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:53,100
Guys! Guys!
It's landing on the building!
45
00:01:53,140 --> 00:01:54,170
Wait, but we don't have a...
46
00:01:55,670 --> 00:01:58,300
"Helipad" is what
I was gonna say.
47
00:01:58,340 --> 00:02:00,370
- Uh-huh.
- Oh, hey, Trip.
48
00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:03,000
- I didn't know that you were coming.
- No. Sure, sure.
49
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:05,440
As the major private donor
to McMurdo,
50
00:02:05,470 --> 00:02:08,670
I am determined to solve
this crisis at all costs.
51
00:02:08,700 --> 00:02:12,070
Funny, that's exactly
the number of costs we charge.
52
00:02:12,100 --> 00:02:14,340
I'm taking your full team
to McMurdo.
53
00:02:14,370 --> 00:02:17,600
Severe winds there right now,
so we'll have to take my sub.
54
00:02:17,640 --> 00:02:19,400
- You have a submarine?
- Hey, bud.
55
00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:22,240
I love humanity,
but in a warming world
56
00:02:22,270 --> 00:02:26,370
on the brink of anarchy,
an exit strategy is only sensible.
57
00:02:26,400 --> 00:02:30,200
We, of course, are very familiar
with your technology ventures.
58
00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:32,070
Including those floating
mini-cities.
59
00:02:32,100 --> 00:02:34,270
Didn't you blow a ton of money
designing those?
60
00:02:34,300 --> 00:02:35,570
In a warming world...
61
00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:37,040
- Yes, we get it.
- We get it.
62
00:02:37,070 --> 00:02:38,570
Why are you so concerned
with McMurdo?
63
00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:41,340
I've spent time
with the people of McMurdo,
64
00:02:41,370 --> 00:02:43,740
and they truly are my family.
65
00:02:43,770 --> 00:02:46,500
My guess is one of those freaks
went eco-terrorist,
66
00:02:46,540 --> 00:02:48,570
and I need to protect
my investment.
67
00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:50,570
Really?
Any evidence for that?
68
00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:54,040
Don't need it, because I have
something better... vision.
69
00:02:54,070 --> 00:02:55,700
Though, not quite enough
vision to see
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00:02:55,740 --> 00:02:57,070
that we don't have a helipad.
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00:02:57,100 --> 00:02:59,740
When you're innovative enough,
everything's a helipad.
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00:03:02,340 --> 00:03:05,540
Hard to argue with that.
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00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:41,193
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
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00:03:43,130 --> 00:03:44,460
Place your bet, folks.
75
00:03:44,490 --> 00:03:47,560
Thawed alien monstrosity?
Uh, flesh-eating virus?
76
00:03:47,590 --> 00:03:49,030
Demon possession.
77
00:03:49,060 --> 00:03:50,460
- Sex worms!
- Look.
78
00:03:50,490 --> 00:03:52,560
All we've got to do
is make sure everyone is okay.
79
00:03:52,590 --> 00:03:55,330
- Other than the murder victim.
- So we solve the murder,
80
00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:57,190
we fix the antenna,
and then we get out of here
81
00:03:57,230 --> 00:03:58,630
before our nipples
rip through our clothing.
82
00:03:58,660 --> 00:04:01,430
Ooh, multi-dimensional
hell-beast that confronts us
83
00:04:01,460 --> 00:04:03,030
with the horror
of our own existence?
84
00:04:03,060 --> 00:04:05,330
No, Mother's still on the sub.
85
00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:07,460
- But why?
- I'll go when they train
86
00:04:07,490 --> 00:04:12,460
penguins to mix a decent French 75
and not a moment before.
87
00:04:12,490 --> 00:04:14,930
- I'll be in the bar.
- And I just don't like
88
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:17,430
being places, you know.
89
00:04:17,460 --> 00:04:20,160
Okay, but how can you help
from the sub?
90
00:04:20,190 --> 00:04:22,330
- Help what?
- Oh, I don't know,
91
00:04:22,360 --> 00:04:23,930
maybe putting our stuff
on the sledge.
92
00:04:23,960 --> 00:04:26,590
I'm dealing with
my own supplies, Lana.
93
00:04:26,630 --> 00:04:29,460
- Is that just booze in there?
- No! For your information,
94
00:04:29,490 --> 00:04:31,460
there's also a huge amount
of pickle juice.
95
00:04:31,490 --> 00:04:33,460
Seriously, you got me fiending.
96
00:04:33,490 --> 00:04:37,360
Welcome to the most
beautiful place on Earth.
97
00:04:37,390 --> 00:04:40,430
Yep, just narrowly edged out
the walk-in freezer at IHOP.
98
00:04:40,460 --> 00:04:42,630
This is Rex, chief of station.
99
00:04:42,660 --> 00:04:45,330
And this is baby Lamont.
100
00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:48,460
I am not saying hello
to a flightless bird.
101
00:04:48,490 --> 00:04:51,560
Your loss and also Lamont's.
102
00:04:51,590 --> 00:04:53,490
He's sensitive.
You just bought me an hour
103
00:04:53,530 --> 00:04:55,090
of tummy rubs tonight.
104
00:04:55,130 --> 00:04:57,330
Hey there, sailor,
you giving those out for free?
105
00:04:57,360 --> 00:04:59,930
Yes, penguins
don't use currency.
106
00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:03,460
So are you here for the antenna
repair or for the murder?
107
00:05:03,490 --> 00:05:06,190
We need to get a handle
on the situation.
108
00:05:06,230 --> 00:05:08,490
Gather everyone on base
for questioning.
109
00:05:08,530 --> 00:05:11,160
Krieger here will attempt
to repair the main antenna.
110
00:05:11,190 --> 00:05:12,590
But right now,
you need to get me inside
111
00:05:12,630 --> 00:05:14,290
because if I get any colder,
112
00:05:14,330 --> 00:05:16,090
I'm gonna literally
murder someone.
113
00:05:16,130 --> 00:05:19,630
- Oh! Sorry. Too soon?
- He was my friend.
114
00:05:19,660 --> 00:05:21,590
But come on,
it's not like there were
115
00:05:21,630 --> 00:05:23,630
a ton of options out here.
116
00:05:23,660 --> 00:05:26,430
It's like an oat milk orgy
in here.
117
00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:29,560
A half-bottle
of substandard vodka?
118
00:05:29,590 --> 00:05:31,190
I don't drink alcohol.
119
00:05:31,230 --> 00:05:33,930
I need every brain cell
at top capacity
120
00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:35,960
when my mind is uploaded
to the cloud.
121
00:05:35,990 --> 00:05:37,590
Which means we'll need
the vodka
122
00:05:37,630 --> 00:05:39,290
to deal with you until then.
123
00:05:39,330 --> 00:05:41,460
He thinks alcohol
goes in your brain.
124
00:05:41,490 --> 00:05:44,060
You use your mouth.
125
00:05:44,090 --> 00:05:48,160
But, please,
do not leave this area.
126
00:05:48,190 --> 00:05:51,330
Does that seem fishy to you?
127
00:05:51,360 --> 00:05:53,460
I mean, it's not like
you're not gonna drink it.
128
00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:56,460
I'm not saying you're wrong.
129
00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:57,930
I just think
we want them looking
130
00:05:57,960 --> 00:05:59,430
at the pickaxes, so they're, you know,
131
00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:01,330
- "facing their crime."
- Oh.
132
00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:04,890
- What about ropes to symbolize...
- Shh! I'm getting into character.
133
00:06:04,930 --> 00:06:07,230
As a douchebag?
I think you're there.
134
00:06:07,260 --> 00:06:09,060
Lana, please.
We are in the midst
135
00:06:09,090 --> 00:06:11,060
of a closed-door whodunnit,
so forgive me
136
00:06:11,090 --> 00:06:13,290
for actually enjoying my work.
137
00:06:13,330 --> 00:06:15,590
- No.
- What do you mean, "no"?
138
00:06:15,630 --> 00:06:17,460
I don't deal well with dead bodies,
139
00:06:17,490 --> 00:06:19,590
so maybe I should... ahh!
140
00:06:19,630 --> 00:06:22,460
- God, it's worse than I thought!
- What's with him?
141
00:06:22,490 --> 00:06:25,590
Well, after turning his life
around while Archer was in a coma,
142
00:06:25,630 --> 00:06:28,060
he's fallen back
into some old habits.
143
00:06:28,090 --> 00:06:30,090
Like being a whiny little bitch!
144
00:06:30,130 --> 00:06:32,060
Keep it together.
You're a man!
145
00:06:32,090 --> 00:06:33,590
Yeah, that's the thing
about real men...
146
00:06:33,630 --> 00:06:36,190
always saying they're men.
147
00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:39,030
Sharp entrance wound, no evidence
of sawing or slicing.
148
00:06:39,060 --> 00:06:40,890
We're looking at a single blow,
angled downward.
149
00:06:40,930 --> 00:06:43,460
My verdict... this wasn't
a murder at all!
150
00:06:43,490 --> 00:06:47,090
- It was an icicle!
- This was next to the body.
151
00:06:47,130 --> 00:06:50,360
Oh, the shame.
Just sit in it.
152
00:06:50,390 --> 00:06:53,060
- It's a pretty standard move.
- Oh, I'm... I'm Gray.
153
00:06:53,090 --> 00:06:55,890
I've spent most of the last
15 years with penguins.
154
00:06:55,930 --> 00:06:57,930
- I kind of forget how to...
- Be a person?
155
00:06:59,130 --> 00:07:04,090
- I am Dr. Gertrude Rilsa.
- Wow. That was intensely sinister.
156
00:07:04,130 --> 00:07:06,030
Yeah, do you have
a vocal setting
157
00:07:06,060 --> 00:07:08,160
where it doesn't seem like
you're about to kill us?
158
00:07:08,190 --> 00:07:10,590
I will humanize myself.
159
00:07:10,630 --> 00:07:13,330
I study how the isolation
of a small group
160
00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:15,360
affects willingness to engage
161
00:07:15,390 --> 00:07:18,930
in increasingly deviant
sexual behaviors...
162
00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:22,160
with robots...
on drugs.
163
00:07:22,190 --> 00:07:23,430
- Wow!
- The robots?
164
00:07:23,460 --> 00:07:25,060
Do we introduce her
to Krieger or would that...
165
00:07:25,090 --> 00:07:26,290
Bring about the death of humanity
166
00:07:26,330 --> 00:07:28,590
in a cyber-sexual apocalypse?
Hard yes.
167
00:07:28,630 --> 00:07:31,330
Yes... no. I mean, yes.
No, I... I didn't do it.
168
00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:32,590
I'm second in command
of this base,
169
00:07:32,630 --> 00:07:35,160
and I do everything by the book.
170
00:07:35,190 --> 00:07:37,030
- Um, name?
- Maddox.
171
00:07:37,060 --> 00:07:39,590
Sorry, little jumpy.
Whoo!
172
00:07:39,630 --> 00:07:44,330
- Uh, hey, that's okay. It's a stressful sit...
- It wasn't me, goddamn it!
173
00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:47,430
Playing at detectives,
they must face death
174
00:07:47,460 --> 00:07:52,090
in all her guises, both that
of the victim and their own.
175
00:07:52,130 --> 00:07:54,330
You, uh... you wanna
turn that off?
176
00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:57,060
I am afraid that is not possible.
177
00:07:57,090 --> 00:08:00,060
We were all in the
common area.
178
00:08:00,090 --> 00:08:01,490
Bob left first.
179
00:08:01,530 --> 00:08:03,590
We didn't see him
for the rest of the night.
180
00:08:03,760 --> 00:08:06,776
Then I think Gray left
for a while.
181
00:08:06,811 --> 00:08:10,220
Ah! He must have left
to do some light murdering, then...
182
00:08:10,260 --> 00:08:13,020
He went to my experimental
robot den
183
00:08:13,060 --> 00:08:16,490
to engage in his
ultimate fantasy.
184
00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:19,060
Gray is great,
but let's just say
185
00:08:19,090 --> 00:08:22,020
- I don't leave him alone with Lamont.
- I think we get it.
186
00:08:22,060 --> 00:08:23,720
He wants to fornicate
with penguins.
187
00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:27,020
Did you know penguins
mate for life?
188
00:08:27,060 --> 00:08:29,190
- Fantastic.
- Did anyone else leave
189
00:08:29,220 --> 00:08:31,560
- after Gray?
- Sure, I left for a while.
190
00:08:31,590 --> 00:08:35,020
Oh, ho, ho, ho.
Very interesting.
191
00:08:35,060 --> 00:08:37,590
- I did, twice.
- I left four times.
192
00:08:37,620 --> 00:08:40,360
Thank you. This has
all been very unhelpful.
193
00:08:40,390 --> 00:08:43,590
- Worse murder suspects ever.
- Perhaps not.
194
00:08:43,620 --> 00:08:48,190
I went outside to document
the desolate, inky night...
195
00:08:48,220 --> 00:08:49,590
Well, I'll notify the consulate
196
00:08:49,620 --> 00:08:52,290
of the great nation
of I-don't-care-istan.
197
00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:56,160
Whilst pouring over footage,
I found I had captured
198
00:08:56,190 --> 00:08:59,690
Maddox exiting the murder
location at the time of death.
199
00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:02,320
- Why didn't you tell us before?
- Who can say?
200
00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:05,060
Trying to understand
the human motives
201
00:09:05,090 --> 00:09:09,555
only leads to a labyrinth
of madness and chaos.
202
00:09:10,460 --> 00:09:12,190
- Shut up!
- Oh, shut up!
203
00:09:12,220 --> 00:09:14,560
All right, let's announce
our next contestant
204
00:09:14,590 --> 00:09:18,490
on "Did You Commit Murder?"
205
00:09:18,520 --> 00:09:21,460
And Maddox, come on down!
206
00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:25,960
Pam, come on!
You were supposed to get everyone.
207
00:09:25,995 --> 00:09:26,590
That was a big moment.
208
00:09:26,630 --> 00:09:28,330
- Maddox ain't coming.
- Did she bolt?
209
00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:30,360
No, dummy.
She just got murdered.
210
00:09:30,530 --> 00:09:34,070
My God, this is terrible.
211
00:09:34,100 --> 00:09:36,330
Seriously, that totally ruins
my game-show thing.
212
00:09:36,370 --> 00:09:39,200
- Really? That's the problem?
- Um...
213
00:09:39,230 --> 00:09:41,170
I made a Plinko board!
214
00:09:45,190 --> 00:09:48,620
Guys, we're sure
Plinko wouldn't be useful here?
215
00:09:48,660 --> 00:09:51,820
- No!
- So Maddox wasn't the murderer.
216
00:09:51,860 --> 00:09:53,520
- Ya think?
- Look.
217
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:55,760
If we're going to solve this,
it's not going to be
218
00:09:55,790 --> 00:09:58,090
by engaging in petty squabbles!
219
00:09:58,120 --> 00:09:59,660
Man, you don't know us at all.
220
00:09:59,690 --> 00:10:02,260
Can you think of any motive
for the murder?
221
00:10:02,290 --> 00:10:04,160
I don't know... any research
worth killing over?
222
00:10:04,830 --> 00:10:08,150
Don't be ridiculous.
Our main study has been mapping
223
00:10:08,151 --> 00:10:11,800
the depth of ice sheets,
using small explosive charges.
224
00:10:11,830 --> 00:10:14,730
Congratulations.
You just made explosives boring.
225
00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:17,000
Well, they found a flaw
in the ice sheet,
226
00:10:17,030 --> 00:10:19,200
which would be catastrophic
if it gave way...
227
00:10:19,230 --> 00:10:22,860
a hundred years of sea level
rise in ten minutes.
228
00:10:22,900 --> 00:10:24,400
Wow. I stand corrected.
229
00:10:24,430 --> 00:10:28,200
That is in fact so boring,
the word "boring" just killed itself.
230
00:10:28,230 --> 00:10:29,460
Krieger, can you examine
these bodies?
231
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:32,160
- We need a clue.
- Okay, but these days,
232
00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:34,730
I've got more practice
with cephalopod bodies.
233
00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:36,260
What the hell happens
in that lab?
234
00:10:36,300 --> 00:10:38,730
Okay, Archer and I are gonna
go search Maddox's quarters.
235
00:10:38,760 --> 00:10:41,260
- I'll give you a hand.
- No, you will not. You're a suspect.
236
00:10:41,300 --> 00:10:44,900
And just what are we
expected to do?
237
00:10:44,930 --> 00:10:48,030
Oh, no, Rexy,
Big Mama lost again.
238
00:10:48,060 --> 00:10:50,930
What am I gonna
have to take off now?
239
00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:54,715
- Strip solitaire is not a thing!
- I'm out.
240
00:10:54,716 --> 00:10:57,060
- What?
- Yeah, on people. I'm out.
241
00:10:57,100 --> 00:11:02,300
- I can see that. So what now?
- Isn't it obvious?
242
00:11:02,330 --> 00:11:05,060
- Prison tats!
- Exact... no!
243
00:11:05,100 --> 00:11:07,200
We find something else to drink!
244
00:11:07,230 --> 00:11:09,330
I don't care what Trip says.
245
00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:11,060
No one plans for an apocalypse
246
00:11:11,100 --> 00:11:14,860
- without a stash of the good stuff.
- This is a coke sub?
247
00:11:14,900 --> 00:11:16,300
No, I mean, liquor.
248
00:11:16,330 --> 00:11:19,000
- Why would they smuggle liquor?
- They don't.
249
00:11:19,030 --> 00:11:20,860
So where's the cocaine, lady?
250
00:11:20,900 --> 00:11:23,800
It's called logic.
Look into it.
251
00:11:23,830 --> 00:11:27,000
Into what? We don't
even know what we're looking for.
252
00:11:27,030 --> 00:11:28,460
Yes, well,
you've certainly pinpointed
253
00:11:28,500 --> 00:11:30,200
the very nature of a clue.
254
00:11:30,230 --> 00:11:33,030
The question is, who had
the time to ransack the place
255
00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:36,000
after the murder
but before Pam announced it?
256
00:11:36,030 --> 00:11:38,150
No, not necessarily. They
could have tossed the place
257
00:11:38,151 --> 00:11:40,260
- before they killed her.
- Shut up, both of you,
258
00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:42,300
with this deductive timeline
circle jerk.
259
00:11:42,330 --> 00:11:43,860
Wait a minute.
Weren't you the one
260
00:11:43,900 --> 00:11:45,930
reveling in this
closed-door whodunnit?
261
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,130
Before it became
a stupid logic puzzle.
262
00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:51,400
- Who am I, Bernard Bolzano?
- So what do you suggest?
263
00:11:51,430 --> 00:11:53,330
We need to get back
to our instincts,
264
00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:56,628
- like, uh, this, I guess.
- Give me that!
265
00:11:56,830 --> 00:11:59,030
This is Maddox's notebook,
266
00:11:59,060 --> 00:12:01,300
and there are a bunch
of pages ripped out.
267
00:12:01,330 --> 00:12:04,780
- But before that...
- She went out on the ice,
268
00:12:04,781 --> 00:12:07,030
- and she found something, and she was...
- With Rex.
269
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:09,300
- Oh!
- Feel that power.
270
00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:14,160
And I'm going to do that
every two minutes
271
00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:16,930
until you let us out.
272
00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:20,330
And his anguish
was not just in his genitals.
273
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:24,330
- It was in his soul.
- Jesus, Cyril.
274
00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:26,030
You leave your nuts
in your other uterus?
275
00:12:26,060 --> 00:12:29,300
No! It's abundantly
clear they're still here.
276
00:12:29,330 --> 00:12:31,330
Seriously,
what happened to you?
277
00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:34,060
Archer happened to me!
Can't you all see that?!
278
00:12:34,100 --> 00:12:35,930
He, like, drags you back
to your worst self
279
00:12:35,960 --> 00:12:38,130
like some kind of horrible
reverse therapist!
280
00:12:38,160 --> 00:12:40,330
Uh, whatever, dude.
I feel great.
281
00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:42,260
Girl, if you were
any more on the prowl,
282
00:12:42,300 --> 00:12:44,330
there'd be an APB out
on your cooch.
283
00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:46,260
You see me backsliding?
284
00:12:46,300 --> 00:12:48,260
I don't even want it anymore.
285
00:12:48,300 --> 00:12:50,430
I gotta keep eating it
to fill the void
286
00:12:50,460 --> 00:12:53,400
that eating it creates,
like a snake eating
287
00:12:53,430 --> 00:12:56,200
- its chocolaty delicious tail.
- Um, hi.
288
00:12:56,230 --> 00:12:57,460
Can you come with me to the garage?
289
00:12:57,500 --> 00:12:59,430
Things are getting creepy,
and I'd feel better
290
00:12:59,460 --> 00:13:01,160
with an escort.
291
00:13:02,830 --> 00:13:04,200
No, you do not see that.
292
00:13:04,230 --> 00:13:06,060
You're right.
I'll... I'll stand up to him.
293
00:13:06,100 --> 00:13:08,000
Hey, Cyril,
if you could stop masturbating
294
00:13:08,030 --> 00:13:09,800
for a second,
send Pam over with Rex.
295
00:13:09,830 --> 00:13:11,247
Also, you suck.
296
00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:17,930
Oh!
Innapropski.
297
00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:20,000
Rex, my man.
There he is.
298
00:13:20,030 --> 00:13:23,300
Hey, can you hand Lamont
over to Pam?
299
00:13:23,330 --> 00:13:25,400
- Oh!
- We know you did it, asshole!
300
00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:28,330
Let go of my beautiful polar bear!
301
00:13:28,360 --> 00:13:30,130
Maddox's notebook said
you went out on the ice
302
00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:32,060
to investigate some blip
after the flyover.
303
00:13:32,100 --> 00:13:33,860
That doesn't mean I killed her!
304
00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:36,130
Good point.
One second.
305
00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:39,030
But there could be
any number
306
00:13:39,060 --> 00:13:41,000
of reasons we're radioactive.
307
00:13:41,030 --> 00:13:43,330
Oh, I know, and it also explains
308
00:13:43,360 --> 00:13:46,130
the penguin excrement
on the ice ax!
309
00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:48,400
Damn it, Lamont!
310
00:13:48,430 --> 00:13:50,800
It's true.
311
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:54,130
I've had bottles smuggled
into Yemen in a camel's ass.
312
00:13:54,160 --> 00:13:56,330
You only drink what's inside, darling.
313
00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:58,430
So this doesn't seem at all
undignified to you?
314
00:13:58,460 --> 00:13:59,760
- Why should it?
- Uh-huh. Sure.
315
00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:02,200
Quick, the closet!
316
00:14:02,230 --> 00:14:05,730
Things are in motion.
Just a bit of a cash crunch.
317
00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:08,460
I can say there's gonna
be a huge demand
318
00:14:08,500 --> 00:14:10,800
for my floating cities very soon.
319
00:14:13,930 --> 00:14:15,800
Pull the snowmobiles
out of cargo bay.
320
00:14:15,830 --> 00:14:17,760
We have the location
of the package,
321
00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:22,200
and I need Team Alpha out
in force... armed to the teeth.
322
00:14:22,230 --> 00:14:24,930
Now that's fishy
because of the floating cities!
323
00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:27,900
They're on water,
where fish live!
324
00:14:27,930 --> 00:14:32,930
Ah, looks like I have insurance
if your team starts to meddle.
325
00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:35,400
And can you possibly whisper
any louder?
326
00:14:35,430 --> 00:14:39,000
Yes, obviously!
What is with this guy?
327
00:14:39,030 --> 00:14:43,000
Seriously, what's so important
that you had to kill two people?
328
00:14:43,030 --> 00:14:44,460
First off, it's not two.
329
00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:47,030
And... wait.
You don't know?
330
00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:48,900
Oh, I am sorry.
331
00:14:48,930 --> 00:14:51,730
This has been a massive
communication failure.
332
00:14:51,760 --> 00:14:53,060
So you didn't kill Bob!
333
00:14:53,100 --> 00:14:55,200
Oh, no,
I totally killed that asshole.
334
00:14:55,230 --> 00:14:59,860
This all gets a little confusing,
so just stay with me.
335
00:14:59,900 --> 00:15:01,800
There was
an unauthorized flyover,
336
00:15:01,830 --> 00:15:03,430
and I noticed on radar
337
00:15:03,460 --> 00:15:05,330
that the plane
dropped something.
338
00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:08,130
So Maddox and I went
out to see what it was.
339
00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:10,030
It was a hydrogen bomb.
340
00:15:10,060 --> 00:15:12,130
We figured someone
had dropped it as a way
341
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:14,460
to transfer it, since they're
impossible to smuggle.
342
00:15:14,500 --> 00:15:18,730
So Maddox and I took it back
and stashed it.
343
00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:21,200
That night, while we were
deciding what to do,
344
00:15:21,230 --> 00:15:24,300
we discovered Bob
sabotaging the antenna.
345
00:15:24,330 --> 00:15:26,460
He was trying to isolate the base,
346
00:15:26,500 --> 00:15:29,430
and then he discovered us
discovering him.
347
00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:38,060
So when you guys got here,
I thought you were in on it.
348
00:15:38,100 --> 00:15:40,260
So where did you stash it?
349
00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:42,400
Wait. Oh, my God!
350
00:15:42,430 --> 00:15:44,930
- Are we in...
- Shackleton's Hut,
351
00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:48,900
historically preserved
exactly as it was in 1908.
352
00:15:48,930 --> 00:15:52,430
Well... almost exactly.
353
00:15:52,460 --> 00:15:55,160
Uh, wow. What are you
guys doing down here?
354
00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:58,160
Oh, making moonshine,
hydroponic marijuana,
355
00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:01,160
amateur pornography...
you know, for the fans.
356
00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:03,260
And to think
I had a crush on you.
357
00:16:03,300 --> 00:16:06,030
Heh. And now I love you.
358
00:16:06,060 --> 00:16:08,930
Maddox and I
stashed it right here.
359
00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:10,460
Nothing!
360
00:16:10,500 --> 00:16:13,800
That's what I've got to show
for this whole trip!
361
00:16:13,830 --> 00:16:17,200
Tell me about it! You
wouldn't even give me a tattoo.
362
00:16:17,230 --> 00:16:19,260
Look, let's all just...
363
00:16:19,300 --> 00:16:21,930
Put the gun down.
364
00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:25,800
- So, hi. And stab.
- Ahh! Are you serious?
365
00:16:25,830 --> 00:16:29,060
- Seriously, you are nuts.
- Winters get pretty long.
366
00:16:29,100 --> 00:16:31,200
Sterling,
Trip is planning something.
367
00:16:31,230 --> 00:16:34,460
I don't know what, but I have
a few pieces of the puzzle.
368
00:16:34,500 --> 00:16:37,471
Excellent. Okay.
Everybody shut up and focus.
369
00:16:37,506 --> 00:16:39,930
We must meticulously
walk through
370
00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:41,930
every piece of information
we've gathered,
371
00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:44,930
explore every doubt
until we've cracked the case.
372
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:50,330
It will be a long, slow plod
of a conversation.
373
00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:53,200
If everyone is ready...
let's begin.
374
00:16:58,500 --> 00:17:01,260
So, in summary,
Trip's putting a hydrogen bomb
375
00:17:01,300 --> 00:17:04,800
on the flaw to destroy the ice
sheet to sell floating cities.
376
00:17:04,830 --> 00:17:06,200
Wow, that wasn't so long.
377
00:17:06,230 --> 00:17:08,400
Well, I guess
there's only one question now.
378
00:17:08,430 --> 00:17:09,900
Yeah.
379
00:17:09,930 --> 00:17:11,881
What kind of porn?
380
00:17:15,850 --> 00:17:17,950
Man, I'm actually
jealous of the guys at the Alamo.
381
00:17:17,990 --> 00:17:19,950
At least they had access
to good Mexican food.
382
00:17:19,990 --> 00:17:21,350
I don't think that they did.
383
00:17:21,390 --> 00:17:23,020
But anyway, if we fail,
we're dead, so...
384
00:17:23,050 --> 00:17:25,090
Thank you, Sergeant Sunshine, but, yeah,
385
00:17:25,120 --> 00:17:28,690
- we are way outgunned.
- I think we can help with that.
386
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:30,890
The salt water of the pickle
juice acts as a conductor.
387
00:17:30,920 --> 00:17:33,520
When the glass breaks,
the circuit completes,
388
00:17:33,550 --> 00:17:34,850
and it blows
one of the charges.
389
00:17:34,890 --> 00:17:37,720
And this is our moonshine,
creating the...
390
00:17:37,750 --> 00:17:41,118
- Ultimate pickleback.
- Jesus Christ.
391
00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:43,950
Hey, uh, anyone know
what's going on?
392
00:17:43,990 --> 00:17:46,390
They should be coming
straight toward us.
393
00:17:46,420 --> 00:17:48,550
There's no other way
off Antarctica.
394
00:17:48,590 --> 00:17:51,390
Trip does not strike me
as the noble suicide type.
395
00:17:51,420 --> 00:17:53,050
Yeah,
he's more the type to die
396
00:17:53,090 --> 00:17:54,550
in bed with his mistress.
397
00:17:54,590 --> 00:17:57,620
I'm actually seeing him hog-tied.
He's definitely a sub.
398
00:17:57,650 --> 00:18:00,790
Ah-ha!
Gillette and Pam, you horny dorks!
399
00:18:00,820 --> 00:18:02,990
- Thank God you said that!
- Hog-tied?
400
00:18:03,020 --> 00:18:04,650
There's no way Trip
wouldn't have
401
00:18:04,690 --> 00:18:07,420
a remote failsafe shutdown
if things went wrong.
402
00:18:07,450 --> 00:18:10,490
I have dealt with this type
of person before... selfish,
403
00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:12,790
only thinking of themself
at all times,
404
00:18:12,820 --> 00:18:15,020
"screw everyone else" attitude.
405
00:18:15,050 --> 00:18:17,450
I just can't imagine
being like that.
406
00:18:17,490 --> 00:18:20,720
So close and yet so stupid.
407
00:18:20,750 --> 00:18:22,350
All right, we've trained for this.
408
00:18:22,390 --> 00:18:24,690
You truly are my valiant crew.
409
00:18:24,720 --> 00:18:27,390
I'm sorry, what?
410
00:18:27,420 --> 00:18:29,750
What "what"?
Everything's normal!
411
00:18:29,790 --> 00:18:31,590
So what are we doing again?
412
00:18:31,620 --> 00:18:33,390
We're going
to the engine room,
413
00:18:33,420 --> 00:18:35,520
and we're going to take over
the sub.
414
00:18:35,550 --> 00:18:37,350
Will I need Darla?
415
00:18:37,390 --> 00:18:39,820
We'll cross that bridge
when you casually stab it.
416
00:18:41,350 --> 00:18:45,350
You can't stab a bridge...
or can you?
417
00:18:52,790 --> 00:18:54,620
Brine time.
418
00:19:02,820 --> 00:19:05,720
Whoo!
419
00:19:06,890 --> 00:19:08,390
Eat halberd!
420
00:19:11,950 --> 00:19:15,320
- Damn it, Cyril!
- Damn it!
421
00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:20,720
Whoo-hoo!
All right, mop up time!
422
00:19:36,550 --> 00:19:38,450
If he gets away,
we are all dead!
423
00:19:38,490 --> 00:19:42,390
- Yes, Lana, we all still realize that.
- What are you doing?
424
00:19:42,420 --> 00:19:45,090
If that propeller turns on,
you are Archer sashimi!
425
00:19:45,120 --> 00:19:48,090
And your muscles will stop
working in about 30 seconds.
426
00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:49,820
Nah, I'm sure it's not that fast.
427
00:19:49,850 --> 00:19:54,320
Would you please listen
for once? And he's gone.
428
00:19:57,790 --> 00:20:00,390
This is Trip!
Get us out of here!
429
00:20:14,990 --> 00:20:17,890
If you move that hand
another inch,
430
00:20:17,920 --> 00:20:19,790
you won't have it anymore.
431
00:20:28,690 --> 00:20:32,450
I knew it!
Would it kill you to share?
432
00:20:37,750 --> 00:20:40,020
Archer.
433
00:20:40,050 --> 00:20:42,950
Archer? Archer!
434
00:20:42,990 --> 00:20:46,690
- Wake up, dingus!
- Crackers, you nut.
435
00:20:46,720 --> 00:20:49,720
- I'll just wait till next time.
- There is no next time!
436
00:20:49,750 --> 00:20:52,890
- Give me your hand, idiot!
- I can't move.
437
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:55,550
And I can't swim,
yet here we are.
438
00:20:56,750 --> 00:20:59,350
Come on, you featherless freak!
439
00:21:04,020 --> 00:21:05,750
Wow, Archer,
I would like to present you
440
00:21:05,790 --> 00:21:08,450
with a medal for being an idiot
on every continent!
441
00:21:08,490 --> 00:21:09,750
God damn it!
442
00:21:09,790 --> 00:21:11,550
You wanna open your eyes
when you shoot?
443
00:21:11,590 --> 00:21:13,490
You are pathetic.
444
00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:15,490
Hey, everyone!
Why are you bitching?
445
00:21:15,520 --> 00:21:17,620
Hey! You're the one who
made all our lives worse
446
00:21:17,621 --> 00:21:19,890
- by not being in a coma!
- Hmm, true.
447
00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:22,420
Cyril's a wuss,
Pam's gone full horn-monster,
448
00:21:22,450 --> 00:21:23,890
Gillette's probably
binging again,
449
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:26,990
and Lana, you've been a bitch
to Sandra for, like, no reason.
450
00:21:27,020 --> 00:21:29,020
But let me just call up 7.5 billion
451
00:21:29,050 --> 00:21:31,020
of my closest friends
to get their opinions.
452
00:21:31,050 --> 00:21:32,890
Oh, hey, guess what!
453
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:36,320
They're totally fine with it
because they're alive!
454
00:21:36,350 --> 00:21:38,050
And how many times
did you guys save the world
455
00:21:38,090 --> 00:21:40,750
while I was in a coma?
456
00:21:40,790 --> 00:21:44,050
I'll take your silence
to mean zero times!
457
00:21:44,090 --> 00:21:45,650
Honestly, at this point,
458
00:21:45,690 --> 00:21:47,820
I'd wipe out the entire Earth
if you went with it.
459
00:21:47,850 --> 00:21:50,620
Did you people ever consider
that you need me around
460
00:21:50,650 --> 00:21:54,450
because you want the excuse
to be your worst selves?
461
00:21:54,490 --> 00:21:56,050
Oh, shit!
462
00:21:58,450 --> 00:22:01,690
Your little victory meant nothing!
463
00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:04,320
I can detonate the bomb remotely.
464
00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:09,450
Ahh!
465
00:22:17,050 --> 00:22:20,776
So I guess
not everything's a helipad.
466
00:22:22,432 --> 00:22:27,083
sync & correction by f1nc0
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