All language subtitles for Senior.Entourage.2021.720p1080p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]-English

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[dramatic music]

[intense dramatic music]

[Narrator] I once had a big
dream

about making a really big
Hollywood movie

with a really big budget.

Instead, I had to make this
film with only 10 cents.

All right. It wasn't exactly 10
cents,

but we had very little
money and no script.

Where's the script?

Nobody got no scripts here.

[laughing]

[Narrator] The seed for this
film was planted years ago.

As I gradually got to know
my dear friend, Mark Rydell.

One of the most acclaimed
film directors of all time.

Having to his credit such
films as On Golden Pond,

The Rose, The Cowboys.

[Director] Mark.

[snoring]

Hey, hey come on.

Hey, hey Mark.

Come on, we have to start
shooting today.

What? We have to shoot?

[Director] It's you,
it's Ed Asner, Helen Reddy,

Charlie Robinson, Marion
Ross from Happy Days.

My God, how terrific?

[Director] Don't be funny.

You're belittling us,

you're not treating this
seriously, man.

We're making a movie.

Oh my God.

This is ridi...

All right, I'm up, I'm
up, I'm up now what?

[Director] I have a confession
to make.

Yeah. Oh.

[Director] We went to
the Sundance film festival

without you.

? Standing by the wall
in the back of the club ?

? She's a beauty with
the face of an angel ?

? Get out on the floor, so sexy,
turn me on, put your body in motion... ?

[Director] I wanted to take
you.

I was hoping we'd meet
up with your old friend,

- Robert Redford.
- And?

[Director] I got shot down.

Who shot you down?

[Director] It's high
elevation,

there snow slippery ice.

I couldn't risk you falling.

I never heard such
bull..[beep]

You mean because there
was snow and ice,

I couldn't come?

You thought I'd fall?

[Director] You have fallen.

I have seen you fall.

Don't bull..[beep] I have seen
you fall.

No, no-

- [Director] Yes I have.

It must be somebody else.

[Director] No, no, no.
I have seen you fall.

[Mark laughing]

[Director] You're laughing.

[Mark laughing]

I am laughing! You're
so full of...[beep]

I don't fall!

[Narrator] Mark's robust
physical appearance can fool you,

but the fact remains he's 90.

We had already booked
our flights and condo

and couldn't get a refund.

So we decided to go to Sundance
anyway.

? Thinkin' about the music ?

? Hey ?

? The way you cut the rug ?

? Yeah ?

? Just like music ?

? Hey ?

? I can't get enough ooh ?

? Got me feelin' stupid ?

? I feel so out of place ?

? Yeah ?

? I love how you're moving ?

? Yeah ?

? So let go all the way yeah ooh ?

? Baby can this night get any
better ?

? I've got to know ?

? Better ?

? I've got to know ?

? Better ?

? I wanna know ?

? Better ?

? Ooh ?

? Baby we can do whatever ?

? Together ?

? Forever ?

? Forever ?

? Get your ass up off the wall ?

[Director] What happened to
Dick Shawn?

Yeah, he died on stage.

Onstage.

[Director] Tell me that story.

In the middle of his act,

there was like 40 people in the
audience

and he lied down the stage,

we thought it was part of the
act.

And then he laid down,

Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Went on too long, and finally
a stage manager came out,

he was dead.

[Director] How about you?

You wanna go like that?

No.

[Director] You wanna go in my
movie?

You want it?

Would you rather die in bed
with a young hot sexy nurse?

So far sounds good.

[Director] You're liking this
idea?

Yeah [Mark chuckles]

[Director] [indistinct]

So far I'm smiling.

[Director] You're liking that
scene.

Yes, I do like that scene.

[Narrator] Wow.

You see the cross.

You see me, take a guess.

What am I gonna be?

Oh yes, you're right,

the sexy hot nurse.

[Narrator] So then I brought
in Mark's dear old pal,

Charlie Robinson.

[jazz music]

Mark had hired Charlie years ago

to play a role in his film, The
River.

What the hell am I doing

in a movie called Senior
Entourage

and ain't nothing ain't no
script?

[Mark] Charlie, what is with
him?

My agent called me,

says, "Charlie, you got a
meeting at Universal Studios."

I said, "With who?".

And he said a man by
the name of Mark Rydell.

Mark's got snapshots of
pictures all over the place.

So he said, "Sit down."

I said, " Yeah, what's going on?"

He said, Look I'm getting ready

to do a movie called The River.

I said, "Yeah."

He said, "Yeah."

And it's gonna be with
Sissy Spacek and Mel Gibson,

And I said, "Wow!"

I said, "Who is Mel Gibson?"

I'll tell you what,

he sees himself as Francis
Coppola.

That's what he sees.

So he thinks if you Francis,
you don't need a script.

Well he's full of [beep]

[Charlie chuckles]

- Francis, you're full of [beep]
- What are talking about?

How am I gonna make
it right for this crew?

This is a man who has done
this for years and years.

Fifty [beep] years.

[Charlie] And he's brilliant
at it.

[Director] Yeah, I know he is
great.

[Charlie] So he
understands what it takes

to do a good important film.

Listen to him.

He knows what he's talking
about.

You gotta write the thing.

I can't, I wrote for Doris
Roberts,

I wrote for Paul Mazursky,
both of them died.

I was walking through
Washington DC one day,

he grabs his heart.

[Charlie] Okay, yeah. Who?

Then he says he needs
Tums or something like that.

But I though he was having a
heart attack.

I don't want the guy to die on
me.

What heart attack?!

I'm trying to get
money for.. [beep] years.

And now I hear you're not
happy with your five points

and everybody else's got five
points.

This whole thing was my idea.

No, no [beep]

It was your idea?

Oh, God!

[men chattering]
[Mark laughing]

What about me?

[Mark laughing]

I got the final cut on this
movie!

Yeah you [indistinct]

I have final...

That's right

[beep]

Give him the hot nurse.

You want a sexy hot nurse?

I wanted to say you
back to that I'm back.

[all laughing]

He wants a sexy hot nurse.

I thought you liked-

- I almost forget you get to
that point on my hands up.

[Mark and Charlie laughing]

[air whooshing]

Father.

Yes, my son.

Please help me.

What's the problem?

I have been living a
very very strange life.

What's your name, sweetheart?

I'm your sexy hot nurse Mark.

You sure are, huh?

Yes.

Oh My God, how lovely?

Oh.

Wow! I'm so glad to meet you.

Very nice meeting you too.

What's your name?

I have a special invitation
from my friend, Vladimir.

Yeah.

Who organized a very good trip
for us.

Where are we going?

To St. Petersburg.

I want to go immediately.

Making love to women I don't
even know.

Oh God bless you.

- I know it's wrong-
- I'm sorry.

But I enjoyed it.

You did?

I did.

A little bit of comfort,
that's what I'm here for.

I'm here to comfort you, not
you.

[Mark laughing]

I'd love some comfort too.

I'd like to know more
about the filthy things

that you've done and the
dirty things you've done

in your life.

If you could tell me some of
them.

Do you wanna hear my
confession?

Certainly, certainly, let's
go.

[Mark chuckles]

In the name of the Father and
the Son

and the Holy Spirit,
son, tell me the sins.

Bless me father for I've
sinned.

Ah.

It's been a long time
since my last confession.

How long?

It's been a bunch of years.

Oh B'jesus.

What have you done during that
time?

Well, I've committed a lot of
sins.

Right.

But the one I'm most
concerned about right now is

Yeah

Just this making this movie.

You there.

Me here in the tub.

You in the tub.

[speaking in Japanese language]

[laughing]

[speaking in Japanese language]

You wanna join us? Come on
join us.

Come on in, come on in.
[nurse laughing]

[speaking in Japanese language]

[all laughing]

[Narrator} Okay. Enough of
this delightful debauchery.

I was trying desperately
to assemble an arsenal

of actors to make this thing
work.

Without money I had to rely on
favors.

So we dragged in Ed Asner.

[trumpet upbeat music]

[Director] Any chance you
can help us get Dick Van Dyke

into this movie?

Is he still alive?

[Narrator] The other problem
I had was that I promised

Ed Asner that Dick Van Dyke
would be in the movie too.

Well, Dick signed a letter of
intent

but I wasn't actually able to
get him

because, well we didn't have a
script.

Brian, Dick Van Dyke is not
one of my strong impressions.

What about Robert De Niro?

Robert De Niro, he calls him up

and Ed's got a question

and Robert De Niro has the
answer,

go back and forth, they
have a little conversation.

I told him he'd be calling
Dick Van Dyke

and I don't even know if Ed
knows.

- Oh, Yeah.
- De Niro

Okay.

Well how about George W. Bush?

Why couldn't he call him?

Old leftist, calling and old
ambidextrous.

You should have this
conversation going on.

That could be pretty [chuckles]

Pretty classical.

[chuckles]

I can't imagine Ed's gonna
believe

that George Bush is gonna
take his call [indistinct]

He's got a good imagination.

How about Tommy Lee Jones?

Tommy Lee Jones call him up

or take his call, Ed Asner.

It's good Tommy Lee
Jones worked very short.

Ed, Ed, just pick up the phone.

[Director] Will you call him
for us?

I said I would, yeah, call

but I don't think Dick listens.

Dicky, Dicky is that you?

Yes Ed I'm here. What do you
want?

Well you don't have
to be so abrupt do you?

Mark and I are involved
in selling this idea,

it's called Senior Entourage.

[dog roaring]

What do you think?

Well I guess so.
[dog roaring]

We've never worked together,
have we?

What?

I said we'd never really
worked t ogether, have we?

You and me?

[dog roaring]

I remember watching you
with Mary Tyler Moore

and I learned a lot from watching
you and Mary Tyler Moore.

I consider you two my tutors.

So what do you say? Are you in
or not?

Oh, I'm gonna have
to see a script first.

You wanna what?

I said I gotta see a script
first.

Well, we'll send it to you on
email.

Yeah, I'm not too big on
email.

Send me a hard copy.

I got your hard copy.

[farts]

You bastard?

[Dick] All right Ed, we are
done here.

Why do you make such problems
Dick?

'Cause you're older than
everybody else?

Why?

Answer me that.

Hello,

hello?

Dick?

You still there?

[Phone operator] If
you'd like to make a call

please hug up and try again.

Sore head.

[Narrator] And one thing
that every film needs

is an investor.

[drumbeats]

It's an honor to meet you sir.

He wrote us, he's helping
paying for the show.

[Narrator] You see that
guy with was a baseball cap

and a scruffy beard,

that's David Lockhart,
our executive producer.

He's the guy who fooled me

into thinking we could
make a movie for 10 cents.

Okay. Got you.

It's an honor to meet you sir.

It's an honor to meet you.

I've been following your career
since I was a little kid.

when I used to watch a
Mary Tyler Moore Show and-

- Mary Tyler Moore Show.

Yeah. Yeah.

I was on that.

That's that's right. You were
on that.

What do you do?

Yeah, I'm a friend of Brian's,

he brought me on board with
this.

Why?

I wanna see this project
succeed.

What Project?

[Director] Senior Entourage.

Senior Entourage. That's it.

[Director] We're gonna
make a lot of money.

We're gonna make a lot of
money.

That's what Brian told me.

Huh?

What?

You're repeating everything he
says,

don't you have an original idea?

No I don't.

[chuckles]

This one I don't.

What?

He's one of our investor treat
him nice.

I'm one of the investors.

Oh my God, Ed Asner's chair.

Hey, what the heck do
you think you're doing?

Well, I just wanna-

- You're ganna put your
dirty ass on my clean chair?

No way pal.

Who are you?

I'm one of the
investors on your project.

How much you invest?

Talk to Brian about that.

Who?

Mark Rydell and Helen, they
just came,

they are at the door.

That's great.

Helen Reddy.

[audience cheering]

Come on in.

Oh thank you so much.

Do you need more light?

Hello?

Nice to see you.

Nice to see you too.

? Cause it only serves to make
me ?

? More determined to
achieve my final goal ?

? I am strong ?

? strong ?

? I am invincible ?

? Invincible ?

? I am woman ?

[audience cheering]

Yeah.

You're invisible.

[audience cheering]

That was the highlight of my
life.

Who's directing?

I am.

What You?

[Ed guggling]

Can I sit over here is this
all right?

Sit in his chair.

You have one with my name on
it?

What are you doing in my
chair?

What?

Get out of my chair.

You're gonna have to
drag me out of this chair.

My is chair sacred.

That's right, and I'm a sacred
person.

Get him out of here.

[laughing]

No chance, this is my chair
from now on.

He is not leaving.

[Director] Hey Helen,
are you ready for this?

I am now.

Where's the script?

I keep telling you, there is a
script.

There is a script somewhere.

[Director] Mark, I wrote a
script,

I gave it to you

but not everyone in this cast
can remember lines, right?

Well, I remember everything.

What's my name again?

[Director] Mark Rydell.

Oh Yeah I'm Mark Rydell.

Your comments about
the writing being bad.

I'm one of the investors.

I mean, you weren't serious were
you?

You didn't write this, did
you?

No, but I put money in it.

How much?

Enough.

Enough?

Oh, I'm so worried about your
investment.

Do you think you're gonna be
okay?

That's what I'm asking you.

I think you're..[beep]

I do think you're.. [beep]

If you can get the money
back at all, try and get it.

Try and see if you can
get half of it back.

[snoring]

[Phil] Do you think that has
anything

to do with the writing?

[laughing]

That's what happened when the
guy sat

down to write this thing,
he fell asleep like that.

[snoring]

I did a film that didn't
really have a script either.

Kinda like this, kinda like this,
only it was a little bit bigger scale.

Just a little bit.

And it was called Apocalypse
Now, a little bit bigger.

You guys are close.

[Narrator] Now that It looked
like we might pull this off.

Lockhart and I needed another
producer.

I knew this terrific actress,
producer, Dahlia Waingort.

Who had performed My Plays In
The Park with Doris Roberts.

Oh gosh. I missed Doris.

She was hilariously funny
and such a sweetheart.

I am the producer of the film,

I'm also I guess acting in it.

I don't know.

I'm Brian's therapist.

I'm wearing way too many hats.

Oh my God.

What the hell are you doing in
here?

Guys I don't have any makeup on,

I'm doing laundry.

What the heck are you doing in
my house?

Okay. Did Brian put you up to
this?

Who's Brian?

I don't know.

Ian come on.

He's been asking me to produce
this film.

He called me as last
night at 11 [indistinct]

They're having lunch.

I have three kids.

I don't have time to do it.

Don't worry we'll cut it out.

What's going on with you guys.

You've been together like
four years or something.

Come on are you gonna get
married?

Why Is it about us now?

Well, because you don't have
to film me

so it doesn't have to be about
me, right?

It has to be about you guys.

Actually I would like
to have an answer on that.

What?

Are you like surprised?

Oh, so now you're
taking sides against me?

No, why don't you answer the
question?

What question?

Ian.

Yes I will marry you okay?

Then let's not do it, then
I'm gonna cut, all right?

Okay, Brian, I'll do it

if my kids can be in the film,
okay?

[Brian] Oh my God!

No, no seriously, they're
great.

No, no, my daughter's a legit
blue singer

and my other one is a drummer.

[Brian] Why are you
springing on this now?

Your kids have to be in the
movie?

Yeah.

[Brian] Oh my God.

Brian, please, please.

- [Ian] They're actually good.
- No, they're really good.

Seriously, Ian knows.

He knows, he filmed them

when they were performing

in Santa Monica a couple of
weeks ago.

[Brian] All right. Give me a
break.

Leave me alone, I gotta go.

Okay.

[Brian] Come on let's go.

Okay, guys leave my laundry
room please.

So I've been together
with my boyfriend, Ian

for three and a half years.

And I think for two years,

he's been talking about
he wanted to propose.

We've been looking at rings
and it's been at talk.

But he just needs to
do some X amount of it.

So I'm just waiting.

The clock is ticking.

So if he doesn't start to get
going

then let see what happens.

This is an homage.

This is an homage to Mark and
Helen and Ed

and it's an homage to these
great actors.

Charlie Robinson is in it

and then Marion Ross, you've
got these incredible people

that wanna be involved in this
movie

and then we have to pay respect
to them.

And as they come out,
we have to pay respect,

we have to be able to
put food on the table

and we have to pay.

Do you understand we have to pay
them.

How many times are you gonna
talk

about Senior Entourage?

I thought you finished
filming that like years ago.

[Director] No, we finished
filming,

but we still we had to clear
music.

It took a long time.

We had to raise some extra
money.

Yeah, and then this
whole thing came on set

with me and Katherine, my
girlfriend,

we've been dating for a while

and I've been looking for rings

and everybody's giving [beep]

why I'm not proposing and
what's going on and like...

[Director] We have some of
your

other clients in the movie.

Who?

Oh, yeah, yeah that's right.

Marion

[Director] Marion Ross?

Yeah, yeah.

[Director] And Jim Meskimen.

Yeah great.

Talented impressionist.

[Director] Yes.

Very good.

[Director] He does De Niro.

He does-

- De Niro, I do De Niro.

[Director] Let's hear your De
Niro?

Let's move a little bit, a
little bit.

It's gonna happen.

I mean like soon, 'cause
I am working on it.

Just I have my own plan.

I wanna do it my own way.

And not just like when people
say,

"Hey, why don't you do it?"

I'm gonna do it when it feels
right.

That's how it is.

The thing is, I actually,
I don't believe in God.

I'm an atheist.

- Oh an atheist?
- Yeah.

So does that make you like
freer in your sexual life?

If you're like, you can
just do anything you want

in your sex life because God's
not gonna punish you, right?

[laughing]

You're free to do sex, sex
free, is that wonderful?

It's a wonderful thing,
I wish I could do that.

I wish I could do that.

You're a priest, you
can't do stuff like that?

No, I can't do that, I'm
sorry, I can't.

I want to, but I can't. I'm not
free.

But you are free and you're
beautiful.

Look how beautiful you are.

So did you go out there and
you have free sex everywhere?

I wouldn't say that.

No?

No, 'cause I have a boyfriend.

A boyfriend?

Yes.

Oh, that's too bad.

I've been with them
for a very long time now.

Really?

Hmm.

Is he having sex all over the
place

with other people?

I hope not.

Oh, well, we'll see about that
won't we?

If he comes in and confesses
to me, I'll find out.

But I'm not allowed to
tell you, that's the law.

That's the law.

That's the church law, I
can't.

If he comes in and says,

"Look, I've been screwing
around."

What's your name by the way?

Katherine.

I have been screwing around
on Katherine, all the time.

I got all of these women out
there.

I can't say anything.

It's the confessional seal.

It's called the confessional
seal,

I can't tell you that he's been
screwing

around at everybody.

[Narrator] Now back to the
issue

of Dahlia's musical munchkins.

Have you ever tried to deal with
a mom

who wants her kids in a movie?

Brian, my kids have performed
in front of 3000 people.

They're professionals as well.

Okay. So just because they're
young

doesn't mean that they're not
talented

or they don't know what they're
doing.

You didn't come to our
concert in Santa Monica.

Okay. You have no freeking
clue what they can do.

And listen, they do originals

so you don't have to worry
about the clearances.

[Narrator] Suddenly
I found myself wishing

I was someplace else.

Any place else?

Ah, this is better, much
better.

I just needed to speak to someone
who really understands me.

All right. All right.

She can have her kids in the
movie.

Just not the brat with the hat.

He'd steal the whole show.

Brian come on.

[Brian] He's ganna piss

off Asner and Rydell I know it.

Do you know how many people
are gonna wanna see him

in this film?

He's a star.

He wakes up in the morning to
play,

to play the guitar.

He gets up in the morning

and he's like guitar center
guitar center,

I wanna go play music.

[Brian] All right, he's in the
picture

but don't let him wear that hat.

I hate that stupid hat he's
wearing.

Oh no the hat?

The hat makes the whole thing.

[Brian] No, no, I don't
want him wearing the hat.

Okay, well it's up to Erica.
I'm sorry.

[Brian] Oh God, I
have no right no power.

[laughing]

Bye.

[upbeat music]

Where's the script.

Yeah where is the [beep] script.

What do we have to do to
get a script around here?

[air whooshing]

I was hoping to get laid on
his show.

Yes. Well I'm not up for that.

- You are not?
- No, I'm sorry.

I mean, I like you,

but it's a little pushy.

Now you go to the movies

and it's all about vampires and
zombies.

[Ed] Yeah, yeah.

I hope that there are
no vampires or zombies.

No, no, none that I know.

[Narrator] Come on a few
vampires

and zombies never hurt anybody.

[woman screaming]

I guess that's not exactly true.

I've looked at Mark lately

and he's got some of those
qualities,

if you wanna call them that.

He looks like a blood sucker.

And your wonderful movie,

the wonderful movie when
you played the old guy

with the balloons.

Yeah, that's UP

What are you doing next?

You.

Yeah.

[laughing]

What are you doing?

I'm looking at your ear lobes.

Why?

Because they're so long and
funny.

Pendulous.

Pendulous, I like that, that's
good.

[laughing]

I had invested in a
helicopter.

It was gonna save me a lot of
tax money.

Well, after a while,

the guy didn't want it anymore

and I'm stuck with that
helicopter.

Oh.

So now I thought, how am I
gonna get rid

of this helicopter?

Yeah.

And it's eating me alive.

I'd like [beep]

So what I did was, I said

"I'm gonna go on that plane,

up to Hamilton Island with
Conrad Hilton

and the duck hunters."

And I'm gonna sell this.

[laughing]

You never did?

I finally did.

Who's the sucker.

Some guy up in Canada.

[people shouting]

The cast list was in the
VARIETY

and there my name is in it.

I said, "what? I'm in the
movie."

This is even before we got...

My agent didn't know.

All the names from Brando to
mine.

From Brando all the way
down to my name down there.

Which was the one that we had in
the film.

So have her sing in the film.

[Brian] I want her to sing in
the film.

Okay, so bring her over my
house,

my husband Martin is a
musician.

[Brian] Why didn't you tell me
that.

I didn't know that.

Brian come on.

[Brian] I thought he was a
director.

He's a director, but he's a
musician.

You haven't seen him perform?

[Brian] No you never told me
that.

I never knew that.

Well, he's a musician

and I have a beautiful piano in
the house.

Bring her over to the house,

we'll make her feel
comfortable, she'll sing

and I can sell the movie.

I need a hook.

I need an angle to be
able to sell the film.

If I could sell the soundtrack,
I could sell the movie.

[piano music]

I stumbled upon this tune that
she did

that I forgot it was hers which
I loved.

[piano music]

? Delta Dawn what's that
flower you have on ?

And yeah, I mean, I gravitate
towards blues and gospel.

So that might be..

I'm gonna throw that at her
and see if she'd be open to it.

I still haven't learned it,

but it's not that difficult the
song,

I just want to understand
the nuances of it.

So I was thinking that might be

the right one to do sort of.

Brian Connors and
his crazy [beep] ideas.

Hello, how are you?

Thanks for coming.

My pleasure.

You got a beard. I shaved
mine.

Well, you're much more
feminine than me.

Thank you.

In nun's outfit you have them,

two Jewish and nuns outfits?

What's the hell is the matter
with you?

Have you gone crazy Brian?

Oh my God, please,

I need a shot when I talk to
you, I need a fecking drink.

I'll tell you that when I talk
to you.

How long have I known you? Oh my
God.

[car engine roaring]

Why he is a year older than I
am

How come I look so
much younger than you?

'Cause of all that surgery you
had.

Anyway that's, beauty's in
the eye of the beholder.

If certain people think
you're beautiful fine

they can have you.

I don't care for you that way.

I'm excited about the fact
that you don't care for me.

Oh, no, no. That way.

Oh that way.

Yeah.

Sexually, is that what
you are trying to say?

Are you referring to me
sexually?

Yeah.

And you are not interested?

No.

What the [beep] does that
mean?

And that nun's outfit
certainly isn't flattering.

What's the matter with my
nun's outfit?

[sighs]

What's with the nun outfits
Brian?

[Brian] What?

It doesn't make any sense.

Why do you have them in nun
outfits?

[Brian] Nothing about
this movie makes sense.

I'm much more of a Jew than
Mark.

He probably wasn't even Bar
mitzvahed.

Are you kidding?

My Bar mitzvah was the talk of
the Bronx.

I looked out at the world
and said, today I am a man.

The only problem is I
don't have any pubic hair.

[Ed Laughing]

[Brian] What's the movie?

SOME LIKE IT HOT, with Jack
Lemon and...-

- But that's funny,
they're in women's outfits.

[Brian] Well, these guys
are in women's outfits.

They're two old Jewish
guys and nun's outfits.

It's not looks like it's a
bib.

It looks like it's just a
schmatta on him.

[Brian] It's not
schmatta, they are nuns.

He's got a do-rag on his
head and a schmatta around

like a bib

like he's going to the
cafeteria.

Doesn't look like a nun.

You put him in a wig.

You put him in like lipstick

and that's a woman's outfit.

This is not, this is a bib with
a do-rag.

As little as I saw you as an
actor,

you had a certain magic, a
certain excitement as an actor.

Maybe it was that evil grin,
that Nazi grin you have.

[laughing]

But it was that-

- I appreciate the compliment.

Whenever I got close to you,

'cause when you hired
me for The Virginian.

Gunsmoke, no no no Virginian

[laughing]

[Narrator] Now here's
the grand pop quiz,

"Did Mark Rydell direct Ed Asner

in an episode of The
Virginian or was it Gunsmoke?"

If I get the episode of
Gunsmoke.

You get it.

And your name is on it.

Yeah. put your-

- How much do I get?

Put your footage where your
mouth is.

[Mark] Truth is it was
Gunsmoke.

[Ed] It was Virginian.

[Mark] Gunsmoke.

[Ed] That's too bad,
Virginian.

On the weekend, one
weekend he saw me, he says,

"What are you doing this weekend
Charlie?"

I said, "Not much of anything."

He says, "I want you to do
something."

He says, "I love this character
that you were working on."

He said, "Would you do me a
favor?"

I said, "What is?"

He said, "Go to your room tonight,
whenever you get a chance."

And he said, "Put some of this
stuff

down on tape that you put that

how you feel about this guy."

I said, "Really?"

He said, "Yeah."

And I put the stuff down on
tape.

I felt because he was kinda
wild eyed and kind of crazy.

And I gave it to him and he
listened to it

'cause he wanted to put it in
the script

because he had like you, he had
no script.

[Director] Ed, you fell off
the horse?

Yeah.

He fell off the [beep] horse.

Knocked off the horse,
I didn't fall off.

They switched horses on me.

[Horse whining sound]

Unfortunately, he did a right
turn when he was supposed to.

[indistinct] went under
a low hanging branch

and it knocked me off the horse.

I thought it was very
exciting.

And as the director Mark said,

"As I got up, back on that horse

Print, print.

He said "It's all right Ed,

a lot of guys wouldn't
get back up on a horse."

and I thought well, that will
get me

to the store on time.

Yes I remember it now, as you
remind me.

[Ed] Well you thought
it was The Virginian

The Gunsmoke.

? Da-Da-da-da ?

Thank you.

This glass of water is on the
key of G.

[laughing]

You're wrong it's M.

[laughing]

From the top

Ready, one, two, three, four

? Delta Dawn, what's
that flower you have on ?

? Could it be a faded
rose from days gone by? ?

? And did I hear you say he
was a-meeting you here today ?

? To take you to his mansion in
the sky? ?

? She's forty-one and her
daddy still calls her, 'baby' ?

? All the folks around
Brownsville say she's crazy ?

? 'Cause she walks down town
with a suitcase in her hand ?

? Looking for a mysterious
dark-haired man ?

? In her younger days they
called her Delta Dawn ?

? Prettiest woman you ever laid
eyes on ?

? Then a man of low
degree stood by her side ?

? And promised her he'd
take her for his bride ?

? Delta Dawn, what's
that flower you have on ?

? Could it be a faded
rose from days gone by? ?

? And did I hear you say he
was a-meeting you here today ?

? To take you to his mansion in
the sky? ?

? To take you to his mansion in
the sky? ?

[all clapping and cheering]

I have no idea what happened,

but there was some human bones
on the set.

Boy, I tell you right now.

My career will be over...
after I leave this place.

Yeah, yeah.

What are you laughing at?

He's got that German quality,

I told you about.

I told you am Irish
Would you stop that [beep]

[indistinct] before the
war they used to ask Jews.

Oh, "You're Jewish" and
the response would be,

"I'm a German."

Not necessarily.

I'm a German Jew.

Is the answer.

He posed as a German
Jew wherever he could.

with that Nazi grin.

You wanna see my..[beep]?

Yeah. Oh, That's a twisted
[beep].

[Mark] What do you think?

You don't got any pants
on? Oh that's funny.

He goes on at me and the guy

and three other actors are
sitting around

and here comes Francis.

Listen, Joe,

he says, "I wanna tell you
something."

Now you, you said no, let
me explain something to you.

You are [ beep] an actor.

He says, and Marty Sheen is
[beep] actor

he says whatever goes on
this is set is my set.

Okay?

This is [beep] set.

[laughing]

So, anyway, now what happens is,

Mr. Brando shows up [laughing]

Mr. Brando shows up and so they
say,

Marty goes to Mr. Brando

and says Marlon, there's
human bones on the set.

The next day there bones are
gone!

[laughing]

the bones are gone!

[laughing]

Oh, this has been such fun.

[All] Yeah.

? Cause I've heard it all before ?

? And I've been down there on
the floor ?

? No one's ever gonna keep me
down again ?

[audience cheering]

? Oh yes I am wise ?

? But it's wisdom born of pain ?

? Yes, I've paid the price ?

? But look how much I gained ?

? If I have to, I can do
anything ?

If I have to, I can do
anything. I am strong.

I can't sing it.

[upbeat music]

Hello, everyone,

I'm on the set of Senior
Entourage,

today, Ed Asner, Mark
Rydell and Helen Reddy.

We have your director.

He wants to do a lot of things,
right?

I just need some direction from
you.

[indistinct] you're
asking the wrong person

about direction on this one.

I don't know.

Okay.

I don't know if there's
zombies,

there's vampires, there's
whacked out.

[Narrator] Dahlia just
didn't understand how badly

I was scrambling to pull this
off.

Belly dancers. I don't know.

You just gonna have to go with
the flow.

- Okay.
- Sorry.

You're gonna have to go
through everybody's stuff

- and just-
- Okay.

Pick the best things and what
you think

are gonna be the best things.

Okay.

I don't know.

Should I coordinate
with Brian the director?

Because I'm just having a
hard time getting to him.

'Cause he's very busy.

[Narrator] Well, it was a
really frustrating morning.

I had to get Ed and
Mark dressed up as nuns.

That was no easy task.

Then Mark goes on this
long search for his keys,

then his wallet, then his phone.

And of course Ed was grumpy as
usual.

I though you said I
was getting my own car.

Why is he in it if it's my car?

[Brian] We can't afford two
cars Ed.

[beep]

[Narrator] It took Ed 20
minutes

to put the nun's costume on

and when I come back, I see
he's got it on backwards.

[Brian] And did anybody tell
you,

you have your nun's outfit on
backwards

that's your t-shirt we can see.

Yeah.

Do you want to get back?

I like it better this way?

[Brian] Okay. Fine.

I wanna be different from him.

[Narrator] So we finally
get everyone loaded up

in the van and we're all ready
to film.

We're gonna drive down to the
405

and get started with our day.

And then Ed announces that
he's got to take a pee.

Well, Liza handed me
Ed's plastic pee bottle.

But as we're driving down the
405,

guess who has to pour out the
pee,

me, the director.

[Narrator] But enough about
that

let's get back to the movie.

Hi, it's me the sexy hot nurse
again.

[Brian] And my executive
producer, David Lockhart

well his Tom Cruise fantasy is
cruising way out of control.

You had me at hello.

Tokyo fever!

[Narrator] This is what
happens

when you give actors artistic
freedom.

Now, does it bother you,

that people could think
that you're Tom Cruise?

I've had it since I was eighth
grade,

homeless people to little
kids to grandma's and grandpa.

They think I'm him.

So I think I grew up

sort of like imitating him

Are you fit?

Can you do all those things?

Can you swing from a
skyscraper at 20,000 feet -

- You have a skyscraper?

Let's go. Let's do it.

[laughing]

You might get Tom Cruise in
this movie?

[Director] Yeah.

Oh my God.

I'd like to meet Tom myself.

[Director] Favorite nations.

He's getting the same deal.

He's getting what I'm getting?

[Director] Yeah.

How did you do it?

You bought him lunch?

Oh my God.

Look who's here.

Look Who-

- Charlie.

Look hey, y'all look who we
got here.

Look at this.

Oh my goodness!

I'm a big fan.

Give you a big kiss.

All right, my man Tom, my man
Tom.

All right, Good to see you Tom.

Hey, come on back and talk to
me.

I will. I will.

You made my day.

If I knew anything about this
project,

I would be glad to tell you,

but all I know is they picked me
up.

He's the one who organized it.

Brian Connors

and we came out here,
which is a very nice place.

I'll be honest with you.

I've always wanted to be
a player in Hollywood.

So this is my chance and I
figure,

this is a baby step.

But then this other dude comes

and he says "I need the camera
operator can you operate?"

And I'm looking at him.

Then he says, "There
will be food and drinks."

And I'm looking, still looking
at him.

And he says, "And hot girls."

and I said, "Yeah, I'm in."

Senior Entourage.

How could you not like Senior
Entourage?

Just the name.

You don't even have to say
who's in it or anything.

Just say, "Hey, we're making a
movie,

it's called Senior Entourage.

And people were like, "I
wanna be a part of it."

I have no clue what's
going on in this movie.

It makes no sense to me
whatsoever.

Look who's involved in this,

Ed Asner Seven, eight, Emmy
Awards.

That's incredible.

Absolutely incredible.

Yeah. I know he's a little
abusive to me,

but that just goes with the
territory

I met Ed Asner doing a show
called,

Mr. Ricky Calls a Meeting and
it was for LA Theater Works.

Some crazy, crazy, crazy
people, it's just wild.

But I like it.

See what happens in the
editing room.

[Brian] We'll figure it out
and post.

We are in post.

[Brian] All right, we'll
figure it out.

Your are the director.

[Narrator] Meanwhile, back
on the set trouble was brewing.

One of my investors
was walking dangerously

close to the edge.

This was the last thing I
needed.

I don't know if you know this
or not?

I'm one of the producers in this
project.

Okay.

How about a trailer?

Well, I have to talk to
the head boss about that.

Okay.

What about hair and makeup.

I think you're doing just
fine.

Okay.

You don't need much hair work or
makeup.

My hair is getting frizzy.

Oh, that's beautiful.

Okay.

You probably get that all
the time though, don't you?

Well, so what's your
part of being producer?

Are you getting money or?

Well, the head honcho
and I are, I like this

and I, I've invested some
money in the project.

Yeah.

Okay.

Where the money goes.

Sorry.

Where's the money.

Show me the money. I love
black people!

Show me the money!

Just joking, I'm just joking,
continue.

Ignore him.

Yeah.

I want the money from this
show.

I want the money from this show
Brian.

Show me the money.

All right.

I love black people.

Oh, I love that he loves black
people.

I like white people.

[Tom laughing]

All right good to see you
Tom get out of here, go.

[Tom laughing]

Oh, Tom Cruise is totally hot.

[laughs]

The first time I saw him, I
said,

"Hey I did not know you were
this short in real life."

He's like, "What? I'm short."

I'm like, yeah, because the
screen makes you look so big.

[laughing]

My private jet is coming to
get me.

Private jet?

Yeah.

Wow you scored big.

You must really be big in Japan.

Aha.

You really are a lovely woman.

So.

[speaking in Japanese language]

[footsteps pattering]

I hope that was good.

[Narrator] I don't
think that was good Phil.

[speaking Mandarin language]

Hi, it's Dahlia.

Hey, would you like to be in a
movie?

[Narrator] On Golden Pond
was a huge success in China

and has remained popular there
ever since.

Every Chinese know Golden
Pond.

I'm very proud of that.

Yeah, so if I tell them,

Oh, this is Golden Pond
Director,

the whole China will clapping.

Oh, let's go where they can
clap.

Yeah.

I'd love to hear some
applause.

Hey, Marion What's this?

Oh Kathy, that's that's me,

and this is my hometown
of Albert Lea, Minnesota

and I came there to be
open up this theater.

And that theater has been there
forever.

But I was performing in a
play and they honored me

by calling it the Marion
Ross Performing Arts Center.

Ah.

I was thrilled.

Thank you for asking.

Okay.

[Narrator] I always loved
the scenes On Golden Pond

between the young boy, Billy
and the elderly character,

Norman played by Henry Fonda.

That's why it was so special

for me to see Mark teaching a
young girl

from China how to play piano.

What's your name?

My name is Catherine.

Catherine.

What a beautiful name.

I love the name, Catherine.

Oh, that's a pretty name.

How do you spell it?

C-A-T-H-E-R-I-N-E

C-A-T-H-E-R-I-N-E.

I got it?

Yeah.

You play something.

Okay.

Okay.

[piano music]

Very good.

We learned how to play together.

[Narrator] In On Golden Pond,

the young boy asks Norman
played by Henry Fonda,

"Norman, are you afraid of
dying?"

Well, when young Kathy
posed that same question

to Marion Ross their spontaneous
exchange

really took me by surprise.

Nice rhythm. Nice tempo.

Who's that?

Ah, that's my Paul.

My Mr. Paul Michael.

And this is how we looked
when I first met him.

This was him when he
was young on Broadway.

Oh, so handsome.

So handsome and a great singer.

Where is he now?

Well, he went to heaven.

Because he was like 80,
almost 85 years old.

So that was a good life.

We had a wonderful life
together.

Are you afraid of dying?

No, no, I'm not.

I find that's a natural
cycle of everything in life.

And I have a feeling,
I'm not ready to go yet

but when the time comes,

you probably are ready somehow,
somehow

because who knows what the next
phase is.

And maybe I will want to go
somewhere else

or become a piece of atomic
energy out in the universe.

Who knows, who knows.

Is that all... where you are
going to be

after you go to heaven?

I don't know.

And I don't know anybody
who's been to heaven.

None of us knows the answer to
that.

And I can live with not knowing
the answer

and nobody knows the answer

but I think that the structure
of the universe is so orderly

that I think it's going to be
all right

and maybe something more
wonderful

than we can have ever imagined.

Are you going to have a
new adventure in heaven?

I think so. I'm sure of it.

[calm music]

So what's the schedule today?

The schedule is we're gonna be
shooting

some rather unorthodox shots.

I'm just trusting the director.

He's the one comes up with all

the great ideas.

What's your name by the way?

...Kathrine.

Kathrine, What are you
doing behind the camera?

You're very beautiful.

Thank you.

Yeah.

Why don't you put that down a
second.

[Ian] Hey man don't
even think about it now.

No, Just no, no, no.

And your interest in this is?

Man no, don't go there.

I'm writing your paycheck.

I will cut your head,

right here.

This is between me and her not
you.

I'm cutting your head right
now.

Let's say that's what's
happening.

Cutting your head.

All right.

- I'm a professional.
- She is taken.

Sorry, Sorry.

It's fine, all good?

All right.

All good, just not
that one. You see her?

You are a lovely lady.

Yeah. You're a very lucky man.

I know.

You're a very lucky man.

No harm. No foul.

Thank you.

[country music]

? I'd like to find a place
where I could settle down ?

? And I could do it too with you
around ?

? And I never thought that I
would wanna share my life ?

? With a girl I'd want ?

? To call my wife but you are
the one ?

? I never thought that I
could wanna share my life ?

? With the girl I'd want ?

? To call my wife but your the
one ?

? You're the one ?

? You're the one ?

? You're the one ?

Did you bring this or
is this our wardrobe?

I brought it.

Okay. Did you-

- It's how I normally dress.

Okay. Did you bring anything
else?

Yeah, it's outside.

Okay, great.

'Cause this one's a
little busy for camera.

You know, I'm one of the
producers.

Oh, you are, okay.

Are you in the film as well?

- Yes.
- Okay.

So I'll just check with Dahlia

because she brought me on.

But I know that there's
a lot of disrespect

coming from you towards the
talent.

So I just need to get
you in dressed properly.

And then I'll check with Dahlia

on what else I'm supposed to do
with you.

Who said that about me?

Just a couple of the talent

that came to get some
breakfast in the kitchen.

I respect every attractive
woman on this set.

Okay.

What's your name?

Erica.

Phillip.

So what are you gonna wear in
the scene?

Well, you've just told
me I can't wear this.

Okay. So let's grab some other
Stuff.

I'm 'onna check with Dahlia.

And what's your name again?

- Phillip.
- Phillip, okay.

There's a guy on set

that is being very
disrespectful to all the talent.

He's really like crossing the
line.

Okay. Who?

He says, he's the producer.

[Erica laughing]

So I told him that I would talk
to you.

Phil.

Don't know his name?

Maybe Phil.

Phil. Yeah.

Look, he put in some money for
the film.

He's an investor.

He's not really the
producer obviously, right?

Okay. I'll talk to him.

- Okay, cool.
- I'll talk to him.

You're a little inappropriate

with some of the women on the
set.

You have to be careful, okay?

'Cause I'm producing this
movie and it's my reputation

and I really don't want
it to go sour for Brian.

Wow. That's that's pretty
hurtful thing to say.

No, you're a really nice guy.

Okay. So maybe it's
just you being friendly,

but a couple of the girls,

I don't know the crew girls

and some of the extras have just
said

that you're hitting on them.

I'm just being friendly.

Okay. Friendly's fine.

But on a set, there are
ways in which people feel

like they're crossing the line

and you just have to be careful

'cause you're an investor on
this movie

and you wanna be in a position
of respect

and courtesy, but I'm the
producer.

And you really have to
understand

that I like to hire women on my
crews

because then it shows that women
are working in the industry

and that we should be treated
with the

same equal respect as men.

And we should be paid the same
amount

of money as men, right?

Okay. I'm getting a lot,
a lot of hostility here.

I'm a loving kind of guy.

You've got me completely wrong.

I give out positive vibes to
everybody.

People are just... maybe
you're just misreading me.

I mean, you are a charming
woman.

I'm also a married woman Phil.

I don't know if you
saw my kids on the set.

They were in the band there.

Brian.

[Narrator] Meanwhile, Ed was
really starting to worry me.

Not only was he back in that
nun's outfit,

he started growing a beard.

[Brian] Hey Ian, I need a
favor.

Yeah, what's up?

[Brian] Yeah. I need you to
play Dracula

in this next scene.

Dracula?

[Brian] Yeah, you can do it.

Mark is doing Dracula.

[Brian] No, no, no Mark's
tired, he took a nap.

and now he just wants to go
home.

You know Mark, he's just he's
gone.

Yeah, but he has to play
Dracula.

[Brian] we're not gonna
get 'em to play Dracula

this is our last day.

So get someone else. Why me?

[Brian] What do you mean why
are you?

You've got the Romanian accent,

the whole thing-

- Is because I'm Romanian?

[Brian] Yeah. Yeah.

Oh it's like a racist thing?

[Brian] No, Romanian isn't a
race,

that's like a country or-

- Come on, forget it.

No, I'm not playing a vampire,
come on.

[Brian] Ian come on, I need a
vampire.

Okay then get someone, you
have a lot of people on set.

[Brian] I need a real Dracula.

So because I'm Romanian,
I'm playing a Dracula.

[Brian] No, you look
like Dracula for God sake.

Come on what everybody's
against me here.

Like the Dahlia wants to
be to like propose now.

And I'm like...

[Brian] Yeah, you should do
that.

You're crazy if you don't
propose.

Okay. That's nothing to do
with that,

[Brian] There's other
five guys on the set

that would if you don't.

Yeah, well okay. I'm working
on it.

Okay. But there's no
hell I'm playing Dracula.

[Brian] You are playing
Dracula.

All right, listen, Listen it
very good,

there's just no way I'm playing
Dracula.

[Brian] You are playing
Dracula!

No, way.

[organ music]

[Narrator] I don't know.

There's something about vampire
movies

with everyone getting their
necks bit

and their blood sucked.

So I was hoping there was
a way that we could work

in the vampires and
keep my investors happy.

Perhaps even use some green
screen

in case we need to find sponsors
or get product placement.

We need to raise some
money to finish post.

[Announcer] Welcome
to Al's discount center,

where our prices won't scare
you like our competitors.

I guarantee you, you won't walk
out

of here feeling like somebody
sucked the blood out of you.

So come on down and check out
our prices.

[woman screeming]

[Narrator] Vampires really
suck.

[dramatic music]

[grunts]

Phil. Is that his name? Phil?

[Brian] Yes Phil.

Okay.

So he's a nice guy, but he's
really like-

- [Brian] He's a very nice guy.

No, no, no.

[Brian] He gave us a check.

That's the kind of guy-

- So that's why I wanna be
cordial to him,

but he's [beep] not up on
the set with the girls.

Okay. With the women on our...

[Brian] He's a little, I don't
know.

He's lonely.

Okay. But he can't use
this like a dating service.

We're not not here to satisfy
his whims,

did he pay for us to be
able to get him a date?

I don't know.

He's trying to hit

on our crew and our cast.

What's going on, man?

What's your name?

I'm Phillip.

Hey Phillip.

I hear you're looking for some
action.

Hey.

I think you got the wrong guy
buddy.

No, you look like the right
guy.

Hey Phil. Where'd you go?

Phil, come on take on
someone your own size.

[snoring]

Are you on a mission here in
America?

On a mission?

No, I'm a MacGuffin.

I have nothing to do with
anything.

I'm a MacGuffin.

I have nothing to do with the
whole plot of this damn thing.

I don't even know why I'm
involved,

but I'm so happy to see you.

I have a confession to make.

Oh, really?

Yes.

I'd love to hear it.

I was playing the victim for
too long.

Oh, look at the eye patch
going back.

Oh my God, look at you.

I told Mr. Rydell.

Yeah.

That I was tortured.

Tortured?

That's why I lost my eye.

Oh really?

But I just wanted to be a
victim.

I wanted his sympathy.

All right, I can see that.

I wasn't tortured.

No.

I torture people.

You torture, you torturing me
right now.

I'm getting very excited.

Is excitement torture?

This is my very first
confession ever.

Oh really?

What can you give me the quickie
one?

Oh, I like a cookie.

I like a quickie too.

Is it the one from Amsterdam
with the stuff in it?

I don't know what the
hell are you talking about?

Oh, in Amsterdam we only
have cookies with stuff in it.

- Oh really?
- Yeah.

Well would you confess your
sins now?

Oh yeah this was confession.

So ever since I saw
Jude law in The Pope,

I can't get over him.

Wow. Could you get into him?

Yeah. No.

I mean, no, this is a
confession...

[dramatic sounds]

[screaming]

[Dahlia sighs]

[door bangs]

[Brian] Hey, Dahlia.

Oh, Brian please.

[Brian] One more thing-

- I Just need five minutes.

[Brian] Just one more thing,
please.

I know you've worked hard,

but I need one more thing.

What?

[Brian] I don't know where Ian
is

and I don't know where
the hard drives are.

We don't have back ups

and I think we're screwed
if Ian's pissed off at me.

Ian's not pissed off, he
is finally getting married.

He's okay.

[Brian] He didn't like
doing that vampire thing.

...and he's pissed off at me.

It's okay.

He's an actor as well

[Brian] There's a couple of
things

I'd like you to do one more
scene.

One more scene, are you crazy?

[Brian] Yes one more scene.

No, I've given you three
weeks of my life for this.

You know, whatever I had to-

- [Brian] You had fun too.

Okay, I had fun but
your degree of toxicity,

I'm trying to sweat it out right
in here

and you're not even
giving me five minutes.

[Brian] Now am toxic, right?.

Now you say that to me after-

- Okay, you're not toxic, okay?

It's just Phil and everything
that-

- [Brian] What about
Phil? He wrote us a check.

We wouldn't be making this
movie...-

- He wrote us check but I
almost got fricking sued

by sexual harassment case with
one of our wardrobe people.

Can you please close the door

so that I can relax for five
minutes?

Okay. I'm trying to sweat it
out.

[Brian] Come down,
all right? For God sake.

Just close the [beep] door!

[Brian] Come down!

[door bangs]

Stop filming me.

I can see you're a beautiful
woman.

I think men have been ravaging
you

probably for years, have they?

I have three children.

Oh, really?

I don't think that I should be
talking

to you about that stuff.

Oh no.

Yeah. Brian-

- I have several children myself

and I am a priest, do you
believe that?

Priests can't have children?

Oh, well I can, I'm a
different kind-

- Yeah, of course you are,
right?

[laughing]

I'm a bit of a womanizer,
you know what I mean.

I have a couple of drinks like
this

and well, I'm not going...

I'm really...

Really you too.

Yeah.

Are you kidding me? All right.

Oh, thank you.

...Jack.

Yeah.

Oh right. There you go.

Oh my God.

Yeah. It always gets
me a little jacked off,

when I drink this, you know?

Wow. Wow.

Isn't that good?

I could use two more tonight.

I think you and I might be an
item...

if you think of it.

Oh, I wouldn't mind
getting in the bathtub.

I actually have been wanting-

- Oh God, this is what I've
been hoping for all of my life.

This is a really nice one.

Isn't this nice?

It's very comfy, isn't it?

Oh, I never thought I'd be in
a bathtub with a Jewish women.

I really didn't.

You're the second one to come in
here.

The first one was a Jew.

Tell me story father.

[Narrator] Sorry. This
part is only available

in the special features menu due

to explicit language and
content.

[people chattering]

Okay, so I convinced Brian

that you guys can be in the
movie, okay?

But you have to play music.

You have to play the drums
and you have to sing.

What type of movie is it?

Does it have like zombies?

No, it doesn't have zombies.

What are you talking about?

This is a movie about Ed
Asner and Mark Rydell,

it's a movie about old guys.

They don't have zombies.

Come on everybody is driving
me crazy.

I'm just trying to get
this movie done, all right?

Easy buddy, easy.

No more kids in the movie.

No more kids in the movie?

No more kids in the movie.

[speaking in Vietnamese
language]

[Commercial announcer]
Hello folks here at Ray's

audio and video, we understand
budgets.

And we'd like to help put you

into a new entertainment
center that you can afford.

So don't be a zombie.

Get on up out of that
chair and come on down.

We're here until 10 o'clock
tonight.

You wouldn't want to end
up looking like this guy.

Oh my God.

I'm worried about getting sued.

We're gonna need a lawyer.

Hi, I'm Melissa Centeno
from Canteno Law Firm.

I am a partner and founder of
the firm

where we specialize in
corporate,

and mergers and acquisitions.

[wind whooshing]
[footsteps pattering]

[door bangs]

How do you know when a lawyer
is lying?

Her lips are moving.

Come on. Let's go see the
cast.

Oh my God.

Are you kidding?

Jimmy this is the greatest.

- Hi, how are you?
- I'm good...

What are you doing.

What are you doing?

[footsteps pattering]
[heavily breathing]

I want to suck your blood.

Oh yeah.

[Brian] Cut, cut.

I said cut.

[piano music]

? No matter what the future
brings ?

? As time goes by ?

? It's still the same old story ?

? A fight for love and glory ?

? A case of do or die ?

? The world will always welcome
lovers ?

? As time goes by ?

"Tomorrow and tomorrow and
tomorrow.

Creeps in this petty
pace from day to day.

To the last syllable of
recorded time.

And all our yesterdays have
lighted fools

the way to dusty death.

Out, out brief candle,

life's but a walking shadow.

A poor player that
struts and frets his hour

upon the stage and then is heard
no more.

It is a tale told by an idiot
full

of sound and fury signifying-

- Signifying nothing, nothing".

Ian actually just got a new
dog

and he wants the dog in the
film.

[Brian] What?

It's a really cute puppy.

People will actually come to see
a movie

because of dogs...

[Brian] Oh, come on what
are we a YouTube video here?

[calm music]

[dog barking]
[car hoots]

What's with Ian?

He wants his dog?

And why is he telling us now?

But I think it would be really
cute,

you can have the dog sit
on Mark's lap or Ed's lap.

[Brian] We already have
enough dogs in this movie.

We don't need another dog in
this movie.

Or maybe Ed's dog and
Ian's dog, can you know...

No, can do what!?

What are you suggesting?
What kind of movie is this?

Are these dogs in the union?

Are they SAG dogs?

[air whooshing]

[footsteps pattering]

[chatter]

[piano music]
[chatter]

Ready? Come on.

[music]

The things a producer has to
go through.

My God.

Right over here, right there.

This is, what we've been
promising him.

[chuckles]

This is how we got him
to get in the shoot.

[laughing]

[chattering]

[laughing]

Okay. So we don't have any
more money for a wrap party.

You have to get another
investor.

Another cameo?

I'm Henry Penzi, I'm from
the original Entourage.

I was called in by Brian,
the director on this movie.

And I was a big fan when he
brought up

the great name as Senior
Entourage.

So I am still a big fan
of Senior Entourage.

[Director] Hey Henry,
is Wahlberg gonna sue us

for using the title Senior
Entourage?

No, he's not gonna sue us
actually

because I'm part of it so

[applauding]

My name is Greg, I'm
in one of the gym scenes.

Henry brought me in

and I just had a couple
of minutes to think.

And I think Senior
Entourage is the best one

or maybe... Age Before Beauty.

[cast and crew affirm]

The title, you want to title,
right?

Senior Fever.

I'm George I'm here for
dessert.

[laughing]

[clapping]

I was part of Brian's
Entourage when he was 17.

In fact, a little bit earlier,

I went to high school with Brian

and certain stories are sealed

but for enough money, I will...

[laughing]

I have a Chinese name
already for this one

[speaking Mandarin language]

It's like, direct translation
will be Senior Again.

[calm music]

I can see Russia.

Where is the [beep] script?

[laughing]

Where is the script we were
supposed to do something,

clearly we had an idea.

Where is the script?

[Narrator] Since I couldn't
wake Ed up from his nun nap,

I asked their old buddy writer,

Jerry Sedley to stand
in for the sunset shot.

[laughing]

[calm music]

[Narrator] So it was finally
time

to see if Dahlia's musical
munchkins had the right stuff.

Hi everybody.

Today, I'm ganna sing an
original

and this is sister Rebecca.

This is my brother Noah.

And this is my dad Martin.

[audience cheering]

[soft rock music]

? Oh baby I love you all the
time ?

[audience cheering]

? Oh baby ?

[Ed snoring]

? 'Cause it's you and me baby ?

? It's you and me baby ?

? You and me baby ?

? You and me baby ?

? It's you and me baby ?

? It's you and me baby
to the end of time ?

[audience cheering]

[Narrator] Well, I'm
very happy to say that

Dahlia's kids certainly proved
me wrong.

[piano music]

[audience cheering]

? Don't be scared girl ?

? Don't be scared ?

? oh no ?

? Don't be scared girl ?

? Don't be scared ?

? I'll give all my heart ?

? my heart ?

? So we don't leave love torn
apart ?

? Torn apart ?

? I love you each and everyday ?

? Everyday ?

? And this is why I say ?

? I say ?

? Don't be scared girl ?

? Don't be scared ?

? Of me ?

? Don't be scared girl ?

? don't be scared ?

? Don't be scared girl of me ?

? Don't be scared ?

? Don't be scared girl ?

? Who-Oh ?

Don't you be scared girl.

[all cheering and clapping]

Excuse me, are you Andy Dick?

If there's money in it, yes.

No really, are you Andy Dick?

Not exactly, no.

You probably get that a lot,
don't you?

I get that from time to time?

[snoring]

I think he's alive. Oh
B'jesus.

Let me give you a little...

There you are. There you are.

Come on, get up.

Who the hell are you?

You gotta to confess your sins
to me.

Come on, get up.

Don't give me a hard time now.

Want me confess what sins?

Sins, the sins of your unholy
life.

What are doing with that
vodka?

[beep]

Come on now, get up.

What are you doing in this
room?

What the hell?

I don't even know where we are.

- For God's sake-
- What are you a pervert?

I thought you were dead.

Are you a pervert?

Come now, come on get up.

[Narrator] You know
what I need right now?

Some forgiveness and grace.

? I'm so glad Jesus lifted me ?

? I'm so glad Jesus lifted me ?

? I'm telling you ?

? I'm so glad Jesus lifted me ?

? Singing glory hallelujah
Jesus lifted me ?

[singers vocalizing]

? Amazing Grace... ?

? How sweet... the sound... ?

There you go know

Oh, sister, sister.

Get off me.

Get of me, get of me now,
I don't want you near me.

Oh my God.

All right now let me bless you.

All right.

The name of the Father, the
Son, and the Holy Spirit.

Now relax and just tell me your
sins

so if you do kick the bucket

very soon, you'll go straight
to the hereafter, okay?

I'm not gonna kick any [beep]
bucket.

Well you don't know what that
means?

What?

It mean you go up to heaven.

I'm not...

You see the Lord, you see all
the angels

No, no, no.

Oh for goodness sakes.

You got the wrong party.

Yeah, there's a good pick me
up.

? Amazing grace ?

? How sweet the sound ?

? That saved a wretch like me ?

? I once was lost ?

? Was lost ?

? But now I'm found ?

What do you want?

I want to hear your sins

that I can give you absolution,

forgive you and go straight
to heaven if you die.

You're gonna go out
that window before I die.

? I say Martha ?

? I say Martha ?

? I say Martha ?

? I say Martha ?

? I say Martha ?

? Martha don't you moan... ?

? Martha Don't you moan... ?

? Martha Don't you moan... ?

? Martha Don't you ?

[singers vocalizing]

[audience cheering]

Are you really a priest?

Of course I'm a priest.

I'm Father MacGuffin,

Don't you know me? For
God sake, I'm famous.

I'm not a nun.

You're not a nun?

No.

What the hell are you then?

I'm out to have a good time.

Really?

Yeah.

You like my shade?

Oh. And it's very very
become becoming what?

I don't know, but it's very
becoming.

They make the outfit-

- Really beautiful.

Yes. You're a handsome nun.

I will have to say that.

[Narrator] All right,
this scene is getting really

...just a little bit too
bizarre.

I think it's time to wrap
this movie up with a party.

? You're at the party of the year
and the only thing that matters ?

? Is filling up your cup, lost
in the moment, it's on... ?

? You'll have the time of your
life ?

? No matter where you come
from feeling your best ?

? Lost in the moment, it's on... ?

? Have the time of your life ?

? Take it all inside ?

? Can't believe your eyes,
must be something... ?

? It's so good to be you ?

? It's so good to be you ?

? It's so good to be you ?

? Oh-Oh ?

? It's so good to be you ?

? Tattooed on your shoulder ?

? Far from reality ?

? Free in the moment ?

? Don't it feel good ?

? Don't it feel good ?

? The party is on stupid ?

? You found the way out ?

? Loving yourself ?

? Don't it feel good ?

? Don't it feel good ?

? Have the time of your life ?

? Take it all inside ?

? Can't believe your eyes,
must be something... ?

? It's so good to be you ?

? It's so good to be you ?

? It's so good to be you ?

[fireworks rumbling]

[upbeat music]

[Narrator] We recently caught
up

with well-known Academy award
nominated

Director, Mark Rydell, Emmy
winning actor,

Ed Asner, an actress and
animal activist, Lauren Maddox.

They afforded us a peek
into their discussions

about their new venture
Senior Vegan Vacation.

[Ian's voice] Vegan
vacation the movie take two.

So I was thinking for the next
movie.

Yes.

We could call it Vegan
Vacation

and this could be a
sequel to Senior Entourage

and the Schnooks could be
included.

So this is already a sequel?

Well, we're thinking
about doing a sequel

once this is finalized.

What is this a sequel too?

Yes, we would have like even
more fun.

So, even more fun.

'Cause I know this one will
great.

That dog could be as big
same Saint Bernard by then.

[upbeat music]

[Narrator] Yeah, I once had a
big dream

about making a really big
Hollywood movie

with a really big budget.

Instead, I had to make this film

and I'm really glad that I did.

[upbeat trumpet music]

? They may be old but they still
got it ?

? It's the Senior Entourage ?

? Paparaaah ?

? Life so grand and they know it ?

? Paparaaah ?

? They got no script
but they don't need it ?

? When they have dialog
we all like to hear it ?

? And even if the sky is
blue or the sky is gray ?

? Sure feels good seeing you
today ?

? No bad news we don't wanna
here it ?

? No, no, no bad news ?

? Good vibrations we're
sure gonna give it ?

? We all know they got a lot of
spirit ?

When are we doing the nun
scene?

Like that we're dressed as nuns?

When are we doing that?

[Brian] You just did it.

We did it?

[Brian] This is it.

A full frontal, but I really
would never expose my front.

That's for the Oscar.

You look like Tom Cruise.

You can't handle the truth.

Did you order the code red?

Just joking, it's uncanny.

I don't remember...

You eyes are
pretty... translucent.

Just like yours

They're translucent.

They're not real.

They're not real.

? I love you so ?

[cheering]

Gary Marshall.

He just had such a wonderful
wonderful way

he was with us.

He would say...

we would just make some nice
shows here.

It's not serious. It's not
serious.

And he was always kind to
everybody.

And we had a softball team.

Oh Whoa.

What I would do, was
I would run with my arms

like this.

Oh.

So they were overthrown first
base.

Yeah.

So then I get on and the guys

would get me in.

I see Mark Rydell as a rebel.

[Brian] Rebels without a
wheelchair

[laughing]

So you are embracing this...

You're so sexy.

[laughing]

Why don't we shoot the wrap
party?

Why don't you go down

to the Shangri-La, that's a
great place.

It's right down the street from
my place.

And ask them for a freebie?

A freebie, yeah,

We'll put it, plug them in the
movie.

Why don't you explain it?

That was your job.

Well, I'm MacGuffin...

There's no reason for this thing

to be in the plot, just like me.

There's no reason, it doesn't go
anywhere.

It doesn't mean anything.

You just look it up! Hitchcock

Hitchcock talked about it all
the time.

He made it up the MacGuffin.

But you're the MacGuffin.

I'm the MacGuffin.

Don't you understand? I'm Father
MacGuffin

not McMuffin.

[Upbeat trumpet music]
[singers vocalizing]

So, where do we go from here?

[Upbeat trumpet music]
[singers vocalizing]

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