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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:42,384 --> 00:00:43,969 Yamashita... 2 00:00:44,219 --> 00:00:45,721 Are you awake? 3 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:48,307 Yeah. 4 00:00:48,390 --> 00:00:50,601 Did you see last night's Manzai Battle? 5 00:00:50,684 --> 00:00:52,061 I did. 6 00:00:52,144 --> 00:00:53,228 Horse Oil and Aloe were so funny. 7 00:00:53,312 --> 00:00:56,482 I wonder why they didn't win. 8 00:00:56,815 --> 00:00:58,400 You thought so too? 9 00:00:59,735 --> 00:01:02,112 Why don't we do manzai? 10 00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:04,948 I think we'd make a good comedy act. 11 00:01:05,115 --> 00:01:08,202 When we make it big, I'm buying a Ferrari. 12 00:01:08,827 --> 00:01:10,120 What colour? 13 00:01:10,204 --> 00:01:11,663 Grey. 14 00:01:11,747 --> 00:01:12,831 I'll go so fast, I'll blend in 15 00:01:12,915 --> 00:01:15,292 with the asphalt. Wouldn't that be cool? 16 00:01:15,376 --> 00:01:16,752 You're an idiot. 17 00:01:16,835 --> 00:01:18,504 And my other dream is... 18 00:01:21,006 --> 00:01:22,466 What is it? 19 00:01:25,594 --> 00:01:26,970 You forgot what it is? 20 00:01:28,806 --> 00:01:30,432 Yeah... 21 00:01:33,602 --> 00:01:35,771 You really are an idiot. 22 00:02:32,161 --> 00:02:33,495 Are you OK? 23 00:02:33,579 --> 00:02:36,415 Why is your head sticking out like that? 24 00:02:36,498 --> 00:02:38,876 Hey! What are you doing? 25 00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:40,711 Are you OK? 26 00:02:41,045 --> 00:02:42,755 Is he OK? 27 00:02:42,838 --> 00:02:44,465 What are you doing? 28 00:02:45,549 --> 00:02:47,634 Why are you buried like that? 29 00:02:47,718 --> 00:02:49,470 How can you be smoking? 30 00:02:49,553 --> 00:02:51,847 Yeah. He's buried up to his neck. 31 00:02:51,930 --> 00:02:53,974 - He's weird. - This is weird. 32 00:02:54,683 --> 00:02:56,435 Who are you? 33 00:02:58,187 --> 00:02:59,229 He's weird. 34 00:03:26,298 --> 00:03:29,426 - Hello! - Hello! 35 00:03:29,510 --> 00:03:31,845 - We're Sparks! - Hope you enjoy the show. 36 00:03:31,929 --> 00:03:33,597 My name is Tokunaga. 37 00:03:33,681 --> 00:03:35,015 And I'm really sorry to say this 38 00:03:35,099 --> 00:03:37,309 - But he's Yamashita. - No need to be sorry. 39 00:03:37,393 --> 00:03:39,019 Yamashita is a totally normal name. 40 00:03:39,103 --> 00:03:40,771 - I'm Yamashita! - Thanks for coming. 41 00:03:40,854 --> 00:03:43,732 We're a manzai duo, and our name is Sparks. 42 00:03:43,816 --> 00:03:45,818 Please remember our names and faces. 43 00:03:45,901 --> 00:03:47,736 If you've a better memory, remember 44 00:03:47,820 --> 00:03:49,571 our faces, names, hometowns, blood types, 45 00:03:49,655 --> 00:03:51,865 and what type of girls we like too. 46 00:03:51,949 --> 00:03:53,659 That's too much information! 47 00:03:53,742 --> 00:03:55,661 They'll forget our manzai. 48 00:03:55,744 --> 00:03:56,912 Our names and faces are enough to learn. 49 00:03:56,995 --> 00:03:58,706 - Really? - More importantly... 50 00:03:58,789 --> 00:04:00,666 - Yes? - I get lonely sometimes. 51 00:04:00,749 --> 00:04:02,167 So I'm thinking about getting a pet. 52 00:04:02,459 --> 00:04:04,795 - Why don't you get a parrot? - A parrot? 53 00:04:05,087 --> 00:04:07,381 Parrots talk a lot. You'll have lots of fun. 54 00:04:07,464 --> 00:04:09,425 A pet you can talk with? That sounds fun. 55 00:04:09,508 --> 00:04:11,635 - Yeah. - What do they say? 56 00:04:11,719 --> 00:04:13,804 "Have you paid enough into your pension?" 57 00:04:13,887 --> 00:04:15,931 Do I look like an old geezer? 58 00:04:16,015 --> 00:04:17,141 "I thought you were" 59 00:04:17,224 --> 00:04:18,976 "going to clean this place up." 60 00:04:20,686 --> 00:04:22,479 Parrots don't care about things like that. 61 00:04:23,313 --> 00:04:25,691 "Sit down. We need to talk." 62 00:04:25,774 --> 00:04:27,735 Conversations that start out like that 63 00:04:27,818 --> 00:04:29,528 never end well... 64 00:04:37,202 --> 00:04:38,704 You're late. 65 00:04:41,290 --> 00:04:42,458 Are they funny? 66 00:04:42,541 --> 00:04:43,792 Who knows? 67 00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:47,087 Say something funny! 68 00:04:47,171 --> 00:04:49,048 You're the funny guys, right? 69 00:04:49,131 --> 00:04:50,424 Make us laugh! 70 00:04:54,928 --> 00:04:56,555 "Are you going to fight back?" 71 00:04:56,638 --> 00:04:58,307 Parrots say things like that? 72 00:05:08,692 --> 00:05:09,818 Get on with your show! 73 00:05:09,902 --> 00:05:11,320 You're a parrot, right? 74 00:05:14,156 --> 00:05:16,742 You're the bloody parrot! 75 00:05:26,085 --> 00:05:28,629 Thanks for watching! 76 00:05:35,219 --> 00:05:36,679 I'll get them. 77 00:05:47,648 --> 00:05:48,941 Howdy! 78 00:05:49,024 --> 00:05:50,567 We are Ahondara. 79 00:05:50,651 --> 00:05:54,238 So, are we having a fireworks show tonight? 80 00:05:54,321 --> 00:05:55,572 Fireworks are nice. 81 00:05:55,656 --> 00:05:57,616 Maybe we'd get a bigger audience 82 00:05:57,700 --> 00:05:59,451 if we quit our act and go, "Bang! Bang!" 83 00:05:59,535 --> 00:06:02,162 What's funny about two guys saying "bang"? 84 00:06:02,246 --> 00:06:04,373 Bang! 85 00:06:05,624 --> 00:06:07,334 Bang! 86 00:06:09,086 --> 00:06:12,131 I told you. The crowd's like, "Huh?" 87 00:06:12,214 --> 00:06:13,841 Fizz... 88 00:06:14,842 --> 00:06:15,884 Bang! 89 00:06:15,968 --> 00:06:17,469 Making a fizzing sound first 90 00:06:17,553 --> 00:06:19,096 doesn't change anything. 91 00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:20,222 When people go to the fireworks 92 00:06:20,305 --> 00:06:22,266 they don't go for the sounds. 93 00:06:22,349 --> 00:06:24,810 Did I tell you I have psychic powers? 94 00:06:24,893 --> 00:06:26,645 I look at a person and I know whether 95 00:06:26,729 --> 00:06:30,107 they'll go to heaven or hell when they die. 96 00:06:30,190 --> 00:06:32,067 Where did this weirdo come from? 97 00:06:33,777 --> 00:06:35,320 Hell! 98 00:06:35,404 --> 00:06:36,905 What the hell? 99 00:06:37,072 --> 00:06:38,282 Sorry about that. 100 00:06:38,365 --> 00:06:41,452 Hell... 101 00:06:41,994 --> 00:06:45,080 Hell... 102 00:06:45,164 --> 00:06:46,457 Hell... 103 00:06:46,540 --> 00:06:48,917 Hell... 104 00:06:49,043 --> 00:06:51,086 Oh, my. The crowd's full of sinners. 105 00:06:51,170 --> 00:06:52,379 Mend your ways! 106 00:06:52,463 --> 00:06:53,922 Mend your own way. 107 00:06:54,006 --> 00:06:57,176 - Lame! Say something funny. - Hell... 108 00:06:57,259 --> 00:07:00,137 - You talking to me? - Hell... 109 00:07:00,220 --> 00:07:03,682 Hell... 110 00:07:03,766 --> 00:07:05,476 Hell... 111 00:07:05,559 --> 00:07:08,354 Hell... 112 00:07:08,437 --> 00:07:10,397 Hell! 113 00:07:10,773 --> 00:07:12,232 Come up here, schmuck. 114 00:07:12,316 --> 00:07:14,193 Hey! Settle down! 115 00:07:14,276 --> 00:07:15,319 Hell! 116 00:07:17,446 --> 00:07:21,992 Hell... 117 00:07:22,868 --> 00:07:23,911 Hell! 118 00:07:28,874 --> 00:07:31,001 Hell... 119 00:07:41,804 --> 00:07:43,180 A really fun hell. 120 00:07:50,771 --> 00:07:51,814 Hell. 121 00:07:51,897 --> 00:07:53,315 Hell. 122 00:07:53,899 --> 00:07:55,943 Hell... 123 00:07:56,610 --> 00:07:57,653 Hell. 124 00:07:57,736 --> 00:07:58,779 Hell! 125 00:07:59,655 --> 00:08:01,407 So, you don't care 126 00:08:01,490 --> 00:08:03,784 about gigs you do in the countryside? 127 00:08:04,952 --> 00:08:07,454 I booked you to do manzai. 128 00:08:07,538 --> 00:08:09,623 I didn't ask you to start a fight. 129 00:08:11,208 --> 00:08:12,960 Furthermore... 130 00:08:13,293 --> 00:08:14,837 So... 131 00:08:15,254 --> 00:08:18,215 What was so funny about that hell thing? 132 00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:20,217 I didn't find it funny at all. 133 00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:21,343 Sorry. 134 00:08:22,553 --> 00:08:24,638 Is it my fault for not getting it? 135 00:08:26,265 --> 00:08:29,309 Anyway, you'll never play here again. 136 00:08:30,978 --> 00:08:32,563 You can go. 137 00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:34,690 - Bye, sir. - Goodbye, sir. 138 00:08:34,773 --> 00:08:36,233 I'll call you next week. 139 00:08:38,277 --> 00:08:39,695 Good job, sir. 140 00:08:40,654 --> 00:08:42,072 Are you from Tokyo? 141 00:08:43,032 --> 00:08:46,368 - Want to grab a drink? - Sure. 142 00:08:46,452 --> 00:08:50,080 Ramen & Soba 143 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,043 Let me introduce myself properly. 144 00:08:54,126 --> 00:08:55,711 I'm Sparks' Tokunaga. 145 00:08:55,794 --> 00:08:57,671 I'm Ahondara's Kamiya. 146 00:08:58,756 --> 00:09:01,216 Shouldn't we have invited your partner? 147 00:09:01,300 --> 00:09:02,426 Have you been working for long? 148 00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:03,552 It's our second year. 149 00:09:03,635 --> 00:09:05,137 I see. Let me tell you about comedians. 150 00:09:05,220 --> 00:09:07,848 We don't drink with our partners. 151 00:09:07,931 --> 00:09:09,516 We only meet when we work. 152 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:11,477 Your partner is just your partner. 153 00:09:11,560 --> 00:09:13,479 He's not a friend nor family. 154 00:09:13,562 --> 00:09:15,230 If you want... 155 00:09:15,439 --> 00:09:18,442 you can think of him as your closest rival. 156 00:09:19,401 --> 00:09:20,819 Thanks. 157 00:09:22,446 --> 00:09:23,614 That's a weird way to hold a bottle. 158 00:09:24,239 --> 00:09:26,033 - Sorry. - Thanks. 159 00:09:27,368 --> 00:09:29,870 - Thanks. - We just moved to Tokyo. 160 00:09:29,953 --> 00:09:31,330 We don't know anybody else. 161 00:09:31,413 --> 00:09:33,040 And our agency is full of actors. 162 00:09:33,123 --> 00:09:34,792 We're the only comedians. 163 00:09:35,042 --> 00:09:36,668 So, we still hang out. 164 00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:38,212 Actually, Yamashita brought 165 00:09:38,295 --> 00:09:39,588 his girlfriend with him. 166 00:09:39,671 --> 00:09:41,256 They live together now. 167 00:09:41,548 --> 00:09:43,258 You'll see things change 168 00:09:43,342 --> 00:09:45,177 over the next few years. 169 00:09:46,470 --> 00:09:49,014 Ahondara (Buttwipe) is an impressive name. 170 00:09:49,098 --> 00:09:51,266 I'm not good at choosing names. 171 00:09:51,350 --> 00:09:53,352 My dad always called me Ahondara 172 00:09:53,435 --> 00:09:54,895 so I just took that. 173 00:09:55,646 --> 00:09:58,524 Your duo's name is cool. 174 00:09:58,607 --> 00:10:01,777 - What did your dad call you? - Dad. 175 00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:04,905 - Get it? - That was a joke? 176 00:10:04,988 --> 00:10:06,573 Don't spring it on me. 177 00:10:06,657 --> 00:10:08,951 If your dad calls you that, you're joking, 178 00:10:09,034 --> 00:10:11,453 or you could've a messed-up family tree. 179 00:10:11,537 --> 00:10:12,621 Sorry. 180 00:10:12,705 --> 00:10:14,540 There's no need to apologise. 181 00:10:14,623 --> 00:10:17,167 Say whatever you think, whenever you want. 182 00:10:17,251 --> 00:10:18,335 I will. 183 00:10:18,419 --> 00:10:20,254 But you have to make me laugh. 184 00:10:20,587 --> 00:10:22,381 But when I ask a serious question 185 00:10:22,464 --> 00:10:24,091 I want a proper answer. 186 00:10:24,633 --> 00:10:26,010 I will. 187 00:10:26,385 --> 00:10:28,137 Let me ask you again. 188 00:10:29,054 --> 00:10:31,849 What did your dad call you? 189 00:10:32,641 --> 00:10:34,685 All You Need Is Love. 190 00:10:34,768 --> 00:10:36,478 What did you call him? 191 00:10:37,438 --> 00:10:38,480 Ghost Town. 192 00:10:38,564 --> 00:10:40,274 What does your mum call you? 193 00:10:41,191 --> 00:10:43,360 - What's your problem? - What do you call her? 194 00:10:43,444 --> 00:10:45,988 I don't know, but I probably got it from you. 195 00:10:46,071 --> 00:10:47,614 Your nicknames have conversations! 196 00:10:51,785 --> 00:10:54,371 It took us a while to find the punchline. 197 00:10:54,455 --> 00:10:56,040 Was comedy always this difficult? 198 00:10:56,123 --> 00:10:58,333 I thought I was going to vomit. 199 00:10:58,834 --> 00:11:01,503 We've got a long way to go. But tonight 200 00:11:01,587 --> 00:11:02,713 let's drink. It's my treat. 201 00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:03,881 I'll pay. 202 00:11:03,964 --> 00:11:05,007 Don't be an idiot. 203 00:11:05,090 --> 00:11:07,051 Comedians never let their juniors pay. 204 00:11:12,306 --> 00:11:13,766 Thanks. 205 00:11:13,891 --> 00:11:15,225 That's a weird way to hold a bottle. 206 00:11:15,309 --> 00:11:16,727 Sorry. 207 00:11:19,146 --> 00:11:21,231 - Mr Kamiya. - What? 208 00:11:21,482 --> 00:11:22,816 I want to be your disciple. 209 00:11:25,527 --> 00:11:27,529 May I be your disciple? 210 00:11:30,282 --> 00:11:32,409 - Is that another joke? - I'm serious. 211 00:11:36,288 --> 00:11:37,539 OK. 212 00:11:38,540 --> 00:11:41,001 But on one condition. 213 00:11:41,085 --> 00:11:42,461 What is it? 214 00:11:44,922 --> 00:11:47,299 Promise you'll never forget me. 215 00:11:48,217 --> 00:11:50,052 - Are you dying? - No, idiot. 216 00:11:50,135 --> 00:11:52,721 - But you'll forget me. - No, I won't. 217 00:11:52,805 --> 00:11:55,474 You will. So, I want you to watch me. 218 00:11:55,557 --> 00:11:57,559 I want you to write what I say. 219 00:11:58,185 --> 00:11:59,978 I want you to write my biography. 220 00:12:00,062 --> 00:12:01,522 Your biography? 221 00:12:01,855 --> 00:12:02,898 Yeah. 222 00:12:02,981 --> 00:12:05,275 If you do that, I'll give you full access. 223 00:12:06,235 --> 00:12:08,195 Can I take your last order? 224 00:12:08,278 --> 00:12:10,614 Sorry, little lady. Can we have two more? 225 00:12:10,698 --> 00:12:13,158 No problem. Are you here on holiday? 226 00:12:14,118 --> 00:12:15,869 I'm a local god. 227 00:12:17,955 --> 00:12:20,582 - How many months? - Nine months already. 228 00:12:20,666 --> 00:12:22,167 Not far to go. 229 00:12:22,251 --> 00:12:24,253 - May I? - Go for it. 230 00:12:25,587 --> 00:12:28,006 What a lovely little girl. 231 00:12:28,090 --> 00:12:29,675 You could tell? 232 00:12:31,010 --> 00:12:33,137 - Waitress? - Coming! 233 00:12:35,139 --> 00:12:36,598 But Mentor... 234 00:12:37,057 --> 00:12:41,311 biographies only get published posthumously. 235 00:12:44,314 --> 00:12:47,484 Don't go thinking you'll outlive me. 236 00:12:49,695 --> 00:12:51,030 Call it Kamiya: The Trilogy. 237 00:12:51,113 --> 00:12:52,489 Release Part I when I'm alive 238 00:12:52,573 --> 00:12:54,116 and Part II when I die. 239 00:12:54,199 --> 00:12:55,826 Everyone will want to know what happens 240 00:12:55,909 --> 00:12:57,244 in Part III. 241 00:12:57,327 --> 00:12:59,246 It's funnier that way. 242 00:12:59,830 --> 00:13:00,914 - Listen up. - Yes. 243 00:13:00,998 --> 00:13:02,458 Write what you see each day 244 00:13:02,541 --> 00:13:04,001 in your own words 245 00:13:04,084 --> 00:13:05,836 while it's still alive. 246 00:13:06,754 --> 00:13:07,921 Yes, sir. 247 00:13:09,381 --> 00:13:11,842 - That was a nice place. - It was. 248 00:13:11,925 --> 00:13:14,470 But the beer was a bit warm. 249 00:13:27,691 --> 00:13:29,693 Thanks for the meal. 250 00:13:29,777 --> 00:13:31,695 - Not at all. - Thank you. 251 00:13:31,779 --> 00:13:32,988 Which way are you? 252 00:13:33,072 --> 00:13:34,615 - I'm going this way. - Really? 253 00:13:34,698 --> 00:13:35,741 - Yeah. - See you later. 254 00:13:35,824 --> 00:13:36,867 Definitely. 255 00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:38,994 - Thank you. - Sure. 256 00:14:13,654 --> 00:14:18,909 Spark 257 00:14:18,992 --> 00:14:24,289 Spark 258 00:14:59,283 --> 00:15:04,038 Kamiya's Biography Volume One 259 00:15:36,862 --> 00:15:40,741 Mr Kamiya signed with a big agency in Osaka. 260 00:15:40,824 --> 00:15:42,910 Since I was based in Tokyo 261 00:15:42,993 --> 00:15:44,578 we rarely saw each other. 262 00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:49,666 But Mr Kamiya did contact me quite often. 263 00:15:49,958 --> 00:15:51,001 Kamiya's Biography 264 00:15:51,085 --> 00:15:54,254 I'd spend all day without speaking to a soul. 265 00:15:54,338 --> 00:15:56,507 Then my phone would vibrate. 266 00:15:56,590 --> 00:15:57,633 And every time I saw 267 00:15:57,716 --> 00:16:00,886 the name Kamiya Saizo on the display 268 00:16:00,969 --> 00:16:03,180 life became more exciting. 269 00:16:03,472 --> 00:16:04,807 Hello? 270 00:16:04,890 --> 00:16:06,767 Where are you? 271 00:16:06,850 --> 00:16:09,103 I'm in Tokyo. 272 00:16:09,186 --> 00:16:10,938 It's been a year 273 00:16:11,021 --> 00:16:12,481 since that crappy gig in Atami. 274 00:16:12,564 --> 00:16:14,650 What? I never did a gig like that. 275 00:16:14,733 --> 00:16:17,736 What are you talking about? Then who was it? 276 00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:19,113 It was a local god. 277 00:16:19,196 --> 00:16:21,198 You remember it perfectly! 278 00:16:29,707 --> 00:16:31,250 Tokunaga's over there. 279 00:16:34,962 --> 00:16:37,715 I'm going to work. Call me when you're done. 280 00:16:37,798 --> 00:16:38,924 OK. Take care. 281 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:42,720 Tokunaga, keep it up. 282 00:16:49,435 --> 00:16:52,688 Hello. We're Sparks. Enjoy the show. 283 00:16:53,105 --> 00:16:55,274 I'm thinking about buying a new TV. 284 00:16:55,357 --> 00:16:57,401 But TVs are expensive. 285 00:16:57,484 --> 00:16:59,486 So, I don't know what to do. 286 00:16:59,570 --> 00:17:01,905 - Ask for a discount. - A discount? 287 00:17:01,989 --> 00:17:04,033 At appliance stores, you can usually 288 00:17:04,116 --> 00:17:05,159 negotiate a discount. 289 00:17:05,242 --> 00:17:06,744 But I've never done that before. 290 00:17:06,827 --> 00:17:08,704 Then we'll have to practise. 291 00:17:08,787 --> 00:17:10,497 I'll be the salesman. 292 00:17:10,581 --> 00:17:12,666 Come in as the customer. 293 00:17:12,750 --> 00:17:14,043 OK. 294 00:17:14,752 --> 00:17:16,628 - Welcome. - Do you have AA batteries? 295 00:17:16,712 --> 00:17:18,547 - What do you want? - AA batteries. 296 00:17:18,630 --> 00:17:20,591 - That's not what you... - AA batteries. 297 00:17:20,674 --> 00:17:22,801 No! What did you say you wanted? 298 00:17:22,885 --> 00:17:24,678 - A TV. - Then buy a TV! 299 00:17:24,762 --> 00:17:26,472 So you're sleeping with my friend? 300 00:17:26,555 --> 00:17:27,848 - No, I'm not! - Don't lie! 301 00:17:27,931 --> 00:17:29,141 Tell me who is it! 302 00:17:29,266 --> 00:17:31,518 If you can't, show me your phone! 303 00:17:31,602 --> 00:17:34,146 Give it to me! It's some lowlife... 304 00:17:35,022 --> 00:17:36,857 George Clooney? 305 00:17:37,900 --> 00:17:39,860 George Clooney? 306 00:17:40,944 --> 00:17:42,905 I'm so sorry. 307 00:17:43,072 --> 00:17:44,656 Don't just say sorry! 308 00:17:44,740 --> 00:17:46,492 Sorry doesn't make things better! 309 00:17:46,575 --> 00:17:49,203 Do you have any idea... George Clooney? 310 00:17:49,286 --> 00:17:50,329 I'm so sorry! 311 00:17:50,412 --> 00:17:51,580 Don't say sorry! 312 00:17:51,663 --> 00:17:52,873 It doesn't make things better! 313 00:17:52,956 --> 00:17:54,833 Do you have... I can't keep this any longer. 314 00:17:54,917 --> 00:17:56,543 Wow! 315 00:17:56,627 --> 00:17:58,545 Wow! 316 00:17:58,796 --> 00:18:00,798 George Clooney? 317 00:18:00,881 --> 00:18:05,052 We still battle it out at small theatres. 318 00:18:05,135 --> 00:18:06,929 To get any time on stage 319 00:18:07,012 --> 00:18:08,764 we have to pass an audition 320 00:18:08,847 --> 00:18:10,599 that's held once each month. 321 00:18:10,683 --> 00:18:12,309 Try it once more! 322 00:18:12,851 --> 00:18:14,645 - Welcome. - I want a new TV. 323 00:18:14,728 --> 00:18:17,147 A new TV? How about this one? 324 00:18:17,606 --> 00:18:19,858 Our 40-inch model comes equipped with 325 00:18:19,942 --> 00:18:21,652 the latest technology for only 59,800 yen! 326 00:18:21,735 --> 00:18:23,570 - 59,800 yen? - Yeah. 327 00:18:23,654 --> 00:18:25,739 That's a bit expensive. Can't you go lower? 328 00:18:25,823 --> 00:18:28,575 But we're the ch-ch-cheapest store in town. 329 00:18:28,701 --> 00:18:30,661 We're the cheapest. We can't go lower. 330 00:18:30,744 --> 00:18:32,413 I just came from a cheaper store. 331 00:18:32,496 --> 00:18:33,664 Cheaper than us? 332 00:18:33,747 --> 00:18:36,083 Yeah, their burgers were a lot cheaper... 333 00:18:36,166 --> 00:18:37,710 What are you comparing the prices of? 334 00:18:37,793 --> 00:18:39,294 Don't compare TVs to burgers. 335 00:18:39,378 --> 00:18:40,879 It's equipped with the latest technology. 336 00:18:40,963 --> 00:18:42,256 But their burgers are equipped 337 00:18:42,339 --> 00:18:43,382 with pickles... 338 00:18:43,465 --> 00:18:44,758 They're not equipped with pickles. 339 00:18:44,842 --> 00:18:46,427 They're just slapped on top. 340 00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:56,061 The name's Sparking, right? 341 00:18:58,147 --> 00:18:59,982 Well... 342 00:19:01,483 --> 00:19:04,903 - You. The straight guy. - Yes? 343 00:19:04,987 --> 00:19:06,780 Ever worked in retail? 344 00:19:07,489 --> 00:19:08,741 No, I haven't... 345 00:19:08,824 --> 00:19:10,159 It shows. 346 00:19:10,242 --> 00:19:14,455 Your act wasn't the least bit convincing. 347 00:19:15,414 --> 00:19:17,041 And the funny guy. 348 00:19:17,291 --> 00:19:19,585 Your jokes don't build up on the way 349 00:19:19,668 --> 00:19:21,754 to your closing line. 350 00:19:22,463 --> 00:19:25,007 If you don't build up the jokes 351 00:19:25,090 --> 00:19:27,384 your manzai isn't even manzai... 352 00:19:27,468 --> 00:19:28,552 Right, Tezuka? 353 00:19:28,635 --> 00:19:31,138 - Yes... - Right? See? 354 00:19:31,555 --> 00:19:33,098 So... 355 00:19:33,474 --> 00:19:34,600 If you want Sparking to... 356 00:19:34,683 --> 00:19:36,226 Excuse me. 357 00:19:37,227 --> 00:19:38,812 It's Sparks. 358 00:19:39,605 --> 00:19:41,899 Nobody knows what fat girls are picky about. 359 00:19:41,982 --> 00:19:44,234 You've no idea how important it is 360 00:19:44,318 --> 00:19:45,778 for fat girls like us to eat! 361 00:19:45,861 --> 00:19:46,945 Who cares! 362 00:19:47,237 --> 00:19:50,491 We wanted a place to express our art. 363 00:19:50,574 --> 00:19:53,077 We wanted to earn a voice. 364 00:19:53,160 --> 00:19:55,954 Or we wanted to escape the poverty. 365 00:19:56,038 --> 00:19:57,706 We each had our own battle 366 00:19:57,790 --> 00:19:59,583 and we fought in our own way. 367 00:19:59,792 --> 00:20:01,085 - Don't look at me! - I'm not! 368 00:20:01,168 --> 00:20:02,336 You're just kind of small. 369 00:20:02,419 --> 00:20:04,088 Because you're not two metres tall. 370 00:20:04,171 --> 00:20:07,049 Where did that come from? Not so fast! 371 00:20:07,132 --> 00:20:08,592 Clap, clap for me... 372 00:20:08,675 --> 00:20:10,594 Lamborghini! 373 00:20:11,720 --> 00:20:14,098 I think your material is good. 374 00:20:16,100 --> 00:20:18,477 Those judges wouldn't laugh, no matter what. 375 00:20:21,814 --> 00:20:23,857 That piece was definitely funny! 376 00:20:26,485 --> 00:20:27,986 What's their problem? 377 00:20:34,368 --> 00:20:37,955 A small number of our peers 378 00:20:38,038 --> 00:20:39,832 started to perform on television. 379 00:20:39,915 --> 00:20:41,500 Animal Rock, Scissors, Paper! Here we go! 380 00:20:41,583 --> 00:20:43,502 - Who won? - Me! 381 00:20:44,712 --> 00:20:46,547 Elephant! 382 00:20:46,630 --> 00:20:49,174 Do you know Animal Rock, Paper, Scissors? 383 00:20:49,258 --> 00:20:51,802 - No. - It's Animal Rock, Paper, Scissors. 384 00:20:55,097 --> 00:20:58,350 - My stomach hurts. - Is it that funny? 385 00:20:59,268 --> 00:21:01,353 It's hilarious. 386 00:21:02,855 --> 00:21:04,106 I love them. 387 00:21:17,911 --> 00:21:19,329 Hey. 388 00:21:20,205 --> 00:21:22,416 Why did you change the channel? 389 00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:26,670 Was it that funny? 390 00:21:30,174 --> 00:21:31,925 Want to take this outside? 391 00:21:32,092 --> 00:21:33,344 No. 392 00:21:34,261 --> 00:21:35,596 Sorry. 393 00:21:39,683 --> 00:21:41,852 It's not funny, Four Eyes! 394 00:21:41,935 --> 00:21:43,187 Come here! 395 00:21:52,196 --> 00:21:55,866 One day, Mr Kamiya sent me a message saying 396 00:21:55,949 --> 00:21:57,451 he was making the big move to Tokyo. 397 00:21:58,410 --> 00:21:59,953 He felt his options 398 00:22:00,037 --> 00:22:01,955 were too limited in Osaka. 399 00:22:11,382 --> 00:22:12,466 Mr Kamiya. 400 00:22:13,801 --> 00:22:15,302 Mr Kamiya. 401 00:22:16,345 --> 00:22:17,388 Long time no see. 402 00:22:17,471 --> 00:22:19,181 It's been more than two years. 403 00:22:19,723 --> 00:22:21,141 I thought a little monster was coming 404 00:22:21,225 --> 00:22:23,102 to attack me. It was you? 405 00:22:23,185 --> 00:22:24,853 That's my line. 406 00:22:24,937 --> 00:22:26,980 There's something in the air. 407 00:22:27,064 --> 00:22:28,649 You're making it smell like Osaka. 408 00:22:28,732 --> 00:22:29,983 Shut up. 409 00:22:30,526 --> 00:22:31,568 - Where to? - Drinks? 410 00:22:31,652 --> 00:22:33,654 - It's been so long. - It sure has. 411 00:22:33,737 --> 00:22:34,822 - Doing all right? - I'm doing great. 412 00:22:34,905 --> 00:22:35,948 Good... 413 00:22:36,657 --> 00:22:39,034 - It's a nice area. - It's really nice. 414 00:22:39,118 --> 00:22:41,120 - There's a lake. - There is. 415 00:22:41,203 --> 00:22:42,496 Let's ride a boat! 416 00:22:43,997 --> 00:22:46,250 - I feel good! - Stop it. 417 00:22:46,333 --> 00:22:48,919 I thought you'd jump in. 418 00:22:50,129 --> 00:22:52,673 My heart's racing, you're even not listening. 419 00:22:52,756 --> 00:22:54,758 - Feel good, sir? - Don't ask him. 420 00:22:55,384 --> 00:22:57,636 Don't cause trouble. 421 00:22:57,720 --> 00:22:59,847 - Feel good, sir? - Now you're doing it. 422 00:23:00,055 --> 00:23:01,682 He looks alarmed. 423 00:23:02,766 --> 00:23:04,643 When did you arrive? 424 00:23:04,727 --> 00:23:06,895 You should've called me straight away. 425 00:23:07,187 --> 00:23:09,148 I had stuff to do. 426 00:23:10,733 --> 00:23:12,443 - Let's grab a drink. - Sure. 427 00:23:16,739 --> 00:23:17,990 What do you want? 428 00:23:19,450 --> 00:23:21,201 Coffee, please. 429 00:23:21,785 --> 00:23:23,287 Black? 430 00:23:23,454 --> 00:23:25,122 Semi-sweet? 431 00:23:25,831 --> 00:23:27,833 Semi-sweet sounds nice. 432 00:23:27,958 --> 00:23:29,418 Semi-sweet, please. 433 00:23:30,419 --> 00:23:32,296 - I've got change. - Keep it. 434 00:23:32,921 --> 00:23:34,798 Counting your coins won't make more. 435 00:23:34,882 --> 00:23:37,301 I know. If I took that, it would mean 436 00:23:37,384 --> 00:23:39,094 we shared the bill. 437 00:23:39,636 --> 00:23:41,138 Thank you. 438 00:24:27,935 --> 00:24:29,478 Why did you stop? 439 00:24:29,895 --> 00:24:31,271 Do it properly. 440 00:24:34,441 --> 00:24:36,110 I'm talking to you. 441 00:24:38,362 --> 00:24:40,864 You're expressing yourself, right? 442 00:24:41,115 --> 00:24:44,284 If you did it at home, I wouldn't care. 443 00:24:44,368 --> 00:24:46,578 But you came to do it outside, right? 444 00:24:46,662 --> 00:24:48,038 I've never seen a drum like that. 445 00:24:48,122 --> 00:24:49,790 I think it looks cool! 446 00:24:50,666 --> 00:24:54,128 So, I want to know what sound it makes. 447 00:24:54,420 --> 00:24:56,547 Why are you being so mean? 448 00:24:56,880 --> 00:24:59,007 Let me hear it. 449 00:24:59,299 --> 00:25:01,593 I'm not like that. 450 00:25:05,347 --> 00:25:06,598 Not like what? 451 00:25:06,682 --> 00:25:08,600 Does he think I'm a weirdo or something? 452 00:25:08,684 --> 00:25:10,602 You're definitely a weirdo. 453 00:25:10,811 --> 00:25:12,479 Sorry, but could you play a bit? 454 00:25:12,563 --> 00:25:15,482 We'll leave straight away. Is that possible? 455 00:26:09,036 --> 00:26:10,579 The drum-drum man. 456 00:26:10,662 --> 00:26:12,289 The drum-drum man. 457 00:26:12,373 --> 00:26:13,957 The bright-red-hat man. 458 00:26:14,041 --> 00:26:15,876 May the drum awaken the dragon! 459 00:26:16,460 --> 00:26:17,503 Do you have to sing? 460 00:26:17,586 --> 00:26:18,629 The drum-drum man. 461 00:26:20,881 --> 00:26:22,508 The bright-red-hat man. 462 00:26:22,591 --> 00:26:25,094 May the drum awaken the dragon! 463 00:26:25,844 --> 00:26:29,098 The drum-drum man... 464 00:26:29,181 --> 00:26:30,849 I wonder what will happen tomorrow. 465 00:26:30,933 --> 00:26:33,268 It'd be nice if something nice happened. 466 00:26:34,144 --> 00:26:35,771 The drum-drum man. 467 00:26:35,854 --> 00:26:37,481 This rain is kind of cold. 468 00:26:37,564 --> 00:26:40,317 I hope we have nicer weather tomorrow. 469 00:26:41,026 --> 00:26:42,611 The drum-drum man. 470 00:26:42,695 --> 00:26:44,279 Drums by the drum-man. 471 00:26:44,363 --> 00:26:45,989 Yes, he's the drum-man. 472 00:26:46,073 --> 00:26:48,784 Drumming with a red hat and a drum! 473 00:26:49,410 --> 00:26:50,994 The drum-drum man. 474 00:26:51,078 --> 00:26:52,579 The drum-drum man. 475 00:26:52,663 --> 00:26:54,415 Yeah, he's the drum-man. 476 00:26:54,498 --> 00:26:57,418 The man is really good at the drums! 477 00:26:57,668 --> 00:26:59,211 Drum... 478 00:26:59,294 --> 00:27:01,380 - Drum... - Drumming on a drum! 479 00:27:01,463 --> 00:27:03,966 Drumming on the drum is the drum-drum man! 480 00:27:10,097 --> 00:27:13,851 Harmonica Alley 481 00:27:14,518 --> 00:27:17,229 Mifune Bar 482 00:27:17,646 --> 00:27:21,316 The drum-drum man... 483 00:27:22,234 --> 00:27:26,947 May the drum awaken the dragon... 484 00:27:28,782 --> 00:27:30,701 Is that some sort of folklore? 485 00:27:31,577 --> 00:27:34,163 Tokunaga. Let's go home. 486 00:27:35,789 --> 00:27:37,958 Your feeble attempt at a joke worries me. 487 00:27:38,042 --> 00:27:39,752 You need more training. 488 00:27:40,252 --> 00:27:43,714 Right. I'm going home. 489 00:27:44,423 --> 00:27:45,883 I'll take the first train home. 490 00:27:45,966 --> 00:27:48,635 You're drunk. Come to my place. 491 00:27:48,761 --> 00:27:51,013 What are you talking about? 492 00:27:52,181 --> 00:27:54,433 I'm definitely going home. 493 00:27:54,516 --> 00:27:56,685 - The trains will start soon... - Just come! 494 00:27:56,769 --> 00:27:58,020 Something ripped. 495 00:27:59,021 --> 00:28:02,358 I'll be fine. I can make it home. 496 00:28:02,775 --> 00:28:05,778 I said I'm OK. I'm going home. 497 00:28:05,986 --> 00:28:07,654 Ouch! 498 00:28:08,989 --> 00:28:14,036 - Why did you kick me? - Don't get angry. 499 00:28:14,119 --> 00:28:16,205 You're drunk. I'm worried about you. 500 00:28:16,288 --> 00:28:18,040 Just come to my place. 501 00:28:18,123 --> 00:28:19,958 Why did you kick my butt? 502 00:28:20,042 --> 00:28:22,002 Because it's there. 503 00:28:22,086 --> 00:28:23,754 Are you a mountaineer? 504 00:28:25,964 --> 00:28:28,717 How much farther is it? 505 00:28:30,135 --> 00:28:32,638 We've reached Omekaido. 506 00:28:32,721 --> 00:28:34,515 Nearly there. 507 00:28:47,778 --> 00:28:49,029 We're here. 508 00:28:54,076 --> 00:28:56,745 - Good morning. - Good morning. 509 00:29:12,136 --> 00:29:13,929 Sorry to impose on you. 510 00:29:14,763 --> 00:29:16,473 Give Tokunaga some water. 511 00:29:16,557 --> 00:29:18,017 Welcome back. 512 00:29:18,934 --> 00:29:20,227 It's still early. The people downstairs 513 00:29:20,310 --> 00:29:22,062 will get angry. 514 00:29:31,488 --> 00:29:32,740 I'm Tokunaga. 515 00:29:33,407 --> 00:29:35,534 Welcome. I'm Maki. 516 00:29:39,121 --> 00:29:40,789 Go to bed. 517 00:29:47,212 --> 00:29:49,506 Need anything from the store? 518 00:29:53,385 --> 00:29:55,012 He's asleep. 519 00:29:56,430 --> 00:30:00,601 He's just like an annoying little brother. 520 00:30:09,651 --> 00:30:11,403 Cut it out. 521 00:30:11,820 --> 00:30:14,490 I'm going to give him a one-sided tan 522 00:30:14,573 --> 00:30:16,450 and make him look like Blackjack. 523 00:30:17,534 --> 00:30:19,703 What's funny about that? 524 00:30:20,913 --> 00:30:22,331 It's super funny. 525 00:30:25,709 --> 00:30:27,419 Don't cover your face. That's cheating! 526 00:30:27,503 --> 00:30:28,545 No, it's not. 527 00:30:30,631 --> 00:30:34,009 You should let Tokunaga get some sleep. 528 00:30:39,348 --> 00:30:42,351 Wait a minute... what are you doing? 529 00:30:42,434 --> 00:30:43,936 This will give you a better tan. 530 00:30:44,019 --> 00:30:45,938 Right, Pinoko? 531 00:30:46,021 --> 00:30:48,315 Why are you helping, Maki? 532 00:30:50,275 --> 00:30:51,652 Sorry. 533 00:30:52,444 --> 00:30:53,821 It's OK. 534 00:30:53,904 --> 00:30:55,739 I'm sorry. 535 00:31:04,248 --> 00:31:05,666 What are you doing? 536 00:31:05,749 --> 00:31:07,042 What... 537 00:31:08,293 --> 00:31:09,837 Hey... 538 00:31:10,462 --> 00:31:12,464 Mr Kamiya... 539 00:31:13,757 --> 00:31:17,177 What am I... what's with you? 540 00:31:17,261 --> 00:31:18,345 Excuse me. I've got the runs. 541 00:31:18,429 --> 00:31:20,014 That's too much information. 542 00:31:20,097 --> 00:31:22,433 - Take care. - Too much information. 543 00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:54,965 What did you pray for, Tokunaga? 544 00:31:55,049 --> 00:31:57,301 It was nothing important. 545 00:31:57,384 --> 00:31:59,636 You pray for stuff that's not important? 546 00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:02,056 To become famous as a comedian. 547 00:32:02,139 --> 00:32:04,058 Tokunaga, if you try hard 548 00:32:04,141 --> 00:32:05,809 you'll definitely make it big. 549 00:32:07,102 --> 00:32:09,730 What did you pray for, Maki? 550 00:32:10,939 --> 00:32:12,566 It's a secret. 551 00:32:13,734 --> 00:32:15,861 What about you, Mr Kamiya? 552 00:32:16,153 --> 00:32:17,446 What can you ask God for 553 00:32:17,529 --> 00:32:19,031 with a five-yen coin? 554 00:32:40,260 --> 00:32:42,763 I want to make it big. 555 00:32:50,771 --> 00:32:52,856 What are you writing? 556 00:32:55,484 --> 00:32:56,819 Nothing. 557 00:32:57,361 --> 00:32:58,862 You're good. 558 00:33:01,281 --> 00:33:02,950 Who is this? 559 00:33:03,492 --> 00:33:05,327 Good morning, sir! 560 00:33:05,411 --> 00:33:08,038 - Do you have a shift today? - No, I'm free. 561 00:33:09,039 --> 00:33:11,542 - Want to grab something to eat? - Sure. 562 00:33:11,625 --> 00:33:14,044 I'm leaving right now. See you later. 563 00:33:15,963 --> 00:33:18,966 I think people who wear beige corduroy pants 564 00:33:19,049 --> 00:33:21,802 have no idea what's good about corduroy. 565 00:33:21,885 --> 00:33:22,970 They probably miss the point 566 00:33:23,053 --> 00:33:24,221 on so many things. 567 00:33:25,639 --> 00:33:27,182 - Tokunaga. - Yes? 568 00:33:27,307 --> 00:33:28,976 I own a pair. 569 00:33:30,436 --> 00:33:31,854 It was like we were doing 570 00:33:31,937 --> 00:33:34,148 a fixed point observation of our town. 571 00:33:34,231 --> 00:33:36,900 We went out almost every day for years. 572 00:33:36,984 --> 00:33:39,278 We'd walk around with no destination. 573 00:33:39,361 --> 00:33:41,196 When we got tired, we'd go to Mifune 574 00:33:41,280 --> 00:33:43,365 in Harmonica Alley. We'd order one serving 575 00:33:43,449 --> 00:33:45,242 of something called nikume. 576 00:33:45,325 --> 00:33:46,410 And we'd nibble on that 577 00:33:46,493 --> 00:33:48,120 as we drank past midnight. 578 00:33:48,245 --> 00:33:50,539 Here's your nikume. 579 00:33:50,748 --> 00:33:52,916 And what we should enjoy? 580 00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:54,585 - Yes? - Enjoy your... 581 00:33:54,668 --> 00:33:56,670 - There you go. - She won't say it! 582 00:33:57,838 --> 00:33:59,381 152. 583 00:34:00,090 --> 00:34:01,383 153. 584 00:34:02,593 --> 00:34:03,635 154. 585 00:34:22,946 --> 00:34:24,782 Armour might work. 586 00:34:25,282 --> 00:34:27,826 It'd be funny to do manzai with armour on. 587 00:34:28,243 --> 00:34:29,787 Armour Manzai. 588 00:34:30,537 --> 00:34:31,747 I'll get Ohbayashi to dress up 589 00:34:31,830 --> 00:34:33,040 as a defeated warrior. 590 00:34:33,832 --> 00:34:35,793 I'll go the complete opposite look 591 00:34:35,876 --> 00:34:37,836 wearing the standard suit. 592 00:34:38,128 --> 00:34:39,463 We'll represent different eras... 593 00:34:39,546 --> 00:34:40,756 Tokunaga's Apron 594 00:34:42,132 --> 00:34:43,592 Time for battle! 595 00:34:43,675 --> 00:34:45,928 You're so easily influenced. 596 00:34:46,011 --> 00:34:49,473 We must protect this north-west route! 597 00:34:51,058 --> 00:34:54,144 - Maki's hot pot is the best. - Thanks. 598 00:34:54,228 --> 00:34:55,646 But you did all the work. 599 00:34:55,729 --> 00:34:58,774 - Are you listening to me? - Of course I am. 600 00:34:59,024 --> 00:35:02,236 The faster you speak, the more you'll convey. 601 00:35:02,319 --> 00:35:03,696 - OK. - The more you're at bat 602 00:35:03,779 --> 00:35:04,988 - The more you'll hit. - Right. 603 00:35:05,072 --> 00:35:06,865 So, it's better to speak fast on stage 604 00:35:06,949 --> 00:35:08,701 - But you can't, right? - Right. 605 00:35:08,784 --> 00:35:10,494 It's an opportunity for you to find a way 606 00:35:10,577 --> 00:35:12,413 to express yourself uniquely. 607 00:35:12,496 --> 00:35:13,706 Yes. 608 00:35:13,789 --> 00:35:15,416 Tell her that story. 609 00:35:16,750 --> 00:35:18,502 You look like 610 00:35:18,585 --> 00:35:21,296 you come from a really poor family... 611 00:35:22,881 --> 00:35:25,092 Yes. We were really poor. 612 00:35:26,093 --> 00:35:28,053 My sister had to practise 613 00:35:28,137 --> 00:35:30,305 playing The Flea Waltz on a cardboard piano. 614 00:35:30,389 --> 00:35:31,890 - Lovely. - Yeah. 615 00:35:32,141 --> 00:35:34,435 All the other kids had a piano 616 00:35:34,518 --> 00:35:35,644 or an electric organ at home. 617 00:35:35,728 --> 00:35:38,689 She tried so hard to keep up with her peers. 618 00:35:39,148 --> 00:35:42,026 - She was a tough little fighter. - Yes. 619 00:35:42,526 --> 00:35:45,237 The first day she had a lesson... 620 00:35:48,365 --> 00:35:51,035 What's wrong, Tokunaga? 621 00:35:53,162 --> 00:35:55,039 It doesn't make any sound. 622 00:36:00,002 --> 00:36:02,129 It wasn't switched on. 623 00:36:06,258 --> 00:36:07,634 She'd never played 624 00:36:07,718 --> 00:36:09,553 a real electric organ before. 625 00:36:09,636 --> 00:36:11,847 She didn't even know they had a switch. 626 00:36:13,390 --> 00:36:15,309 My sister was always so kind 627 00:36:15,392 --> 00:36:17,978 and always looked after me. 628 00:36:18,062 --> 00:36:20,147 When I saw her like that 629 00:36:20,230 --> 00:36:23,484 I felt so sad and angry. 630 00:36:24,401 --> 00:36:26,737 What's with your face? 631 00:36:27,071 --> 00:36:29,198 Your sister's doing her best. 632 00:36:32,826 --> 00:36:35,079 What a lovely story. 633 00:36:35,496 --> 00:36:37,664 When she came back that night 634 00:36:37,748 --> 00:36:39,458 she started practising 635 00:36:39,541 --> 00:36:41,335 on that cardboard piano again. 636 00:36:41,418 --> 00:36:42,795 So, I went next to her 637 00:36:42,878 --> 00:36:44,963 and sang as loud as I could. 638 00:36:45,881 --> 00:36:48,258 Then my dad said, "Shut the hell up!" 639 00:36:48,342 --> 00:36:50,386 "Fleas don't waltz!" 640 00:36:50,511 --> 00:36:52,262 We got yelled at. 641 00:36:53,180 --> 00:36:55,224 What are you doing? 642 00:36:56,350 --> 00:36:58,686 I was telling you a nice story. 643 00:36:58,936 --> 00:37:00,354 Don't nod like that. 644 00:37:00,437 --> 00:37:01,772 You weren't listening at all. 645 00:37:01,855 --> 00:37:03,107 That's so nice. 646 00:37:03,190 --> 00:37:04,608 With a background like that 647 00:37:04,692 --> 00:37:06,527 you can definitely make something unique. 648 00:37:08,821 --> 00:37:10,364 Yes. 649 00:37:11,198 --> 00:37:13,158 The doors will open soon. 650 00:37:13,242 --> 00:37:16,120 Please wait on the side in a line. 651 00:37:16,203 --> 00:37:19,331 The Shibuya All-star Festival 652 00:37:19,415 --> 00:37:21,083 Ahondara 653 00:37:21,166 --> 00:37:23,794 Kahlua Milk 654 00:37:23,877 --> 00:37:26,171 Aihara Miho, Kuroro, Shikatani Tatsu 655 00:37:26,255 --> 00:37:28,549 Sparks, Oil Shock Brothers 656 00:37:30,467 --> 00:37:32,594 Stop doing that. That's what I meant. 657 00:37:32,720 --> 00:37:33,804 Here I come! 658 00:37:33,887 --> 00:37:35,889 Hey... don't forget the door! 659 00:37:35,973 --> 00:37:37,016 It got you! 660 00:37:37,266 --> 00:37:38,559 What song is that? 661 00:37:38,642 --> 00:37:40,185 The Night I Turned 85. 662 00:37:40,269 --> 00:37:41,937 It's The Night I Turned 15! 663 00:37:42,354 --> 00:37:43,397 What's with that song? 664 00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:45,274 And where are you going now? 665 00:37:45,357 --> 00:37:46,608 We're going to party all night in the park. 666 00:37:46,692 --> 00:37:48,193 Go home. 667 00:37:48,277 --> 00:37:49,445 You're old. Go home. 668 00:37:49,528 --> 00:37:51,071 But Cecil and Wilbur are waiting. 669 00:37:51,155 --> 00:37:52,322 They're old guys too! 670 00:37:52,823 --> 00:37:54,992 Are you ready? 671 00:37:55,159 --> 00:37:57,369 Not yet. 672 00:37:58,620 --> 00:38:00,789 Are you ready? 673 00:38:00,873 --> 00:38:03,208 Not yet. 674 00:38:03,459 --> 00:38:05,461 Are you ready? 675 00:38:05,544 --> 00:38:07,296 Now I am. 676 00:38:08,130 --> 00:38:09,673 Who the hell are you? 677 00:38:10,049 --> 00:38:12,760 Now it's time to announce 678 00:38:12,843 --> 00:38:15,471 the winner of The Shibuya All-Star Festival! 679 00:38:16,055 --> 00:38:18,182 The winner is... 680 00:38:19,850 --> 00:38:22,311 Shikatani! 681 00:38:22,853 --> 00:38:25,522 Congratulations! Applause! 682 00:38:25,606 --> 00:38:28,692 The winner was a second-year solo act. 683 00:38:28,776 --> 00:38:30,569 He's my least favourite type of comedian. 684 00:38:30,652 --> 00:38:32,488 He's Shikatani. 685 00:38:32,696 --> 00:38:35,115 He has a strong, manly face. 686 00:38:35,199 --> 00:38:36,700 He acts feminine. 687 00:38:36,784 --> 00:38:38,744 And he gets hysterical. 688 00:38:38,827 --> 00:38:40,037 Don't worry. 689 00:38:40,120 --> 00:38:41,163 Not all addicts are scary. 690 00:38:41,246 --> 00:38:42,831 These are especially cute. 691 00:38:42,915 --> 00:38:43,957 Behold! 692 00:38:44,041 --> 00:38:45,626 Cute-baby-animal addict 693 00:38:45,709 --> 00:38:48,253 The cute-baby-animal addict. 694 00:38:48,337 --> 00:38:51,006 Yakuza 695 00:38:52,758 --> 00:38:54,843 Oh, no. 696 00:38:54,927 --> 00:38:57,388 Wait... 697 00:38:57,805 --> 00:38:59,431 This one comes next. 698 00:38:59,515 --> 00:39:00,891 With a character 699 00:39:00,974 --> 00:39:02,393 that's polar opposite of his looks 700 00:39:02,476 --> 00:39:04,395 he created explosive laughter. 701 00:39:04,478 --> 00:39:06,605 Thank you! 702 00:39:09,233 --> 00:39:11,527 Sparks came sixth. 703 00:39:12,027 --> 00:39:15,072 Ahondara were fourth. 704 00:39:21,829 --> 00:39:23,580 See you later... 705 00:39:23,664 --> 00:39:24,915 See you later... 706 00:39:25,207 --> 00:39:28,085 See you later... 707 00:39:28,335 --> 00:39:29,962 Tokunaga. 708 00:39:30,045 --> 00:39:32,089 Thanks for the other day. 709 00:39:32,423 --> 00:39:34,049 I've got another gig, so I'm going. 710 00:39:34,133 --> 00:39:35,676 - See you later. - Sorry. 711 00:39:35,759 --> 00:39:40,681 See you later. 712 00:39:40,764 --> 00:39:44,143 Mr Tokunaga. What a great show! 713 00:39:44,393 --> 00:39:45,728 Let me make a proposal. 714 00:39:45,811 --> 00:39:47,688 Would you like to join The Shikatani Army 715 00:39:47,771 --> 00:39:49,231 as my chief of staff? 716 00:39:49,314 --> 00:39:51,108 We can rule the world together! 717 00:39:51,191 --> 00:39:52,526 Shikatani, let's go to the after party. 718 00:39:52,609 --> 00:39:54,528 - OK! - You guys can come too 719 00:39:54,611 --> 00:39:56,572 See you at the party. 720 00:39:58,407 --> 00:40:00,951 - Congratulations! - Thank you! 721 00:40:02,494 --> 00:40:06,165 Why were we sixth? Sixth? 722 00:40:07,332 --> 00:40:08,834 But, listen! 723 00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:19,094 Tokunaga, I heard you were 724 00:40:19,178 --> 00:40:21,263 on the prefecture team in high school. 725 00:40:22,348 --> 00:40:24,475 Why did you quit soccer? 726 00:40:26,226 --> 00:40:30,564 Would I have been better off doing soccer? 727 00:40:31,690 --> 00:40:34,151 I didn't mean that... 728 00:40:34,234 --> 00:40:37,237 Excuse me. Coming through... 729 00:40:37,613 --> 00:40:39,281 - You did a good job. - Thanks. 730 00:40:39,365 --> 00:40:41,700 Hey, don't just hide in the corner. 731 00:40:41,784 --> 00:40:42,910 The writers are here. 732 00:40:42,993 --> 00:40:45,037 You should talk with them. 733 00:40:46,914 --> 00:40:49,208 Sorry. Excuse me. 734 00:41:31,750 --> 00:41:33,752 In other news, one of the most iconic 735 00:41:33,836 --> 00:41:35,337 manzai artists of the Showa era, 736 00:41:35,421 --> 00:41:37,589 fondly remembered as Koishi 737 00:41:37,673 --> 00:41:39,800 from the duo Naniwa Oishi Koishi, 738 00:41:39,883 --> 00:41:42,219 passed away at a hospital in Kobe 739 00:41:42,302 --> 00:41:45,305 at 12.35am this morning. 740 00:41:45,389 --> 00:41:47,558 He was 78 years old. 741 00:41:49,059 --> 00:41:51,228 - What's your favourite food? - Well... 742 00:41:51,311 --> 00:41:53,480 I do have a favourite food, actually. 743 00:41:53,564 --> 00:41:54,898 What is it? 744 00:41:54,982 --> 00:41:56,233 Hot pots. 745 00:41:56,650 --> 00:41:57,693 Hot pots. 746 00:41:58,235 --> 00:42:01,739 - You eat hot pots? - I love them. 747 00:42:01,822 --> 00:42:04,992 You must have amazing teeth. 748 00:42:05,075 --> 00:42:06,660 My teeth aren't that strong. 749 00:42:06,744 --> 00:42:08,370 I couldn't even try. 750 00:42:08,662 --> 00:42:10,831 So, which are tastier? Steel hot pots 751 00:42:10,914 --> 00:42:13,125 - Or ceramic hot pots? - Neither. 752 00:42:13,208 --> 00:42:15,586 I eat what goes inside the pot. 753 00:42:15,669 --> 00:42:17,337 Oh, you scared me. 754 00:42:17,421 --> 00:42:18,505 If you eat what goes inside 755 00:42:18,589 --> 00:42:19,631 you should've said so... 756 00:42:21,759 --> 00:42:24,470 - Hello. - We're Sparks. Enjoy the show. 757 00:42:24,553 --> 00:42:27,139 I think kids are too quiet these days. 758 00:42:27,222 --> 00:42:29,350 - They're too quiet? - They don't go through 759 00:42:29,433 --> 00:42:31,268 - A rebellious phase. - Really? 760 00:42:31,352 --> 00:42:33,729 This becomes a problem when they get old. 761 00:42:33,812 --> 00:42:34,897 What do you mean? 762 00:42:34,980 --> 00:42:36,690 If they don't have it in their teens 763 00:42:36,774 --> 00:42:37,816 rebellious phases can be... 764 00:42:37,900 --> 00:42:40,819 Sounds like you're talking about the mumps! 765 00:42:41,111 --> 00:42:42,738 Yamashita... 766 00:42:43,113 --> 00:42:45,824 You weren't listening to my lines. 767 00:42:45,908 --> 00:42:47,826 - You're rushing your lines. - Come on. 768 00:42:48,452 --> 00:42:50,204 We've done this piece so many times. 769 00:42:50,287 --> 00:42:52,081 You still want me to listen? 770 00:42:56,794 --> 00:42:59,004 If old geezers enter a rebellious phase 771 00:42:59,088 --> 00:43:01,507 without any immunity, it can be lethal. 772 00:43:01,590 --> 00:43:03,342 What happens when an old geezer 773 00:43:03,425 --> 00:43:05,260 - Gets rebellious? - He'll start smoking. 774 00:43:05,344 --> 00:43:06,637 He already has one foot in the coffin. 775 00:43:06,720 --> 00:43:08,097 He should take more care. 776 00:43:08,180 --> 00:43:09,682 He won't take orders nor his pension. 777 00:43:09,765 --> 00:43:11,850 Why not take the money? 778 00:43:13,268 --> 00:43:15,437 You're still coming in too soon. 779 00:43:17,231 --> 00:43:19,233 You don't want to do this? 780 00:43:19,566 --> 00:43:20,609 I'm doing it. 781 00:43:20,693 --> 00:43:22,903 You're just going through the motions. 782 00:43:39,378 --> 00:43:42,089 I know it's important to practise, but... 783 00:43:43,173 --> 00:43:44,925 I changed my shift to come. 784 00:43:46,427 --> 00:43:47,469 Don't spring it on me. 785 00:43:47,553 --> 00:43:49,513 You should've told me earlier. 786 00:44:15,998 --> 00:44:17,958 Tokunaga? What's up? 787 00:44:18,250 --> 00:44:19,835 Hello. 788 00:44:19,918 --> 00:44:23,380 I'm practising our act... 789 00:44:24,506 --> 00:44:27,760 but my partner is so annoying. 790 00:44:28,344 --> 00:44:30,721 I think I'm going to punch him. 791 00:44:31,138 --> 00:44:32,890 If you punch him, you'll break up. 792 00:44:32,973 --> 00:44:35,267 Don't ever hurt your partner. 793 00:44:36,435 --> 00:44:38,312 But he's so annoying. 794 00:44:38,437 --> 00:44:40,022 Come over after you're done. 795 00:44:40,105 --> 00:44:41,648 Let's eat dinner. 796 00:44:41,732 --> 00:44:44,026 What's your favourite food? 797 00:44:45,527 --> 00:44:47,363 Barbecue? 798 00:44:47,988 --> 00:44:49,406 No, it's not. 799 00:44:49,782 --> 00:44:52,701 What is your favourite food? 800 00:44:55,496 --> 00:44:59,333 I'm asking you what your favourite food is! 801 00:45:00,751 --> 00:45:02,169 Hot pots. 802 00:45:02,920 --> 00:45:04,004 Hot pots? 803 00:45:04,463 --> 00:45:05,672 Yes. Hot pots. 804 00:45:06,131 --> 00:45:08,217 Gosh! You eat hot pots? 805 00:45:08,300 --> 00:45:09,718 That's not what I mean. 806 00:45:10,594 --> 00:45:13,097 Your teeth must be so strong. 807 00:45:13,180 --> 00:45:14,973 I said that's not what I mean. 808 00:45:15,057 --> 00:45:16,850 My teeth aren't that strong. 809 00:45:16,934 --> 00:45:18,435 Do you prefer steel hot pots 810 00:45:18,519 --> 00:45:19,561 or ceramic hot pots? 811 00:45:19,645 --> 00:45:20,854 What are you talking about? 812 00:45:20,938 --> 00:45:22,773 Which are easy to chew? 813 00:45:22,856 --> 00:45:24,775 When people eat hot pots 814 00:45:24,858 --> 00:45:27,653 they don't actually eat the pot. 815 00:45:28,195 --> 00:45:29,530 You said you ate hot pots. 816 00:45:29,613 --> 00:45:32,783 I did. But I eat what gets cooked in the pot. 817 00:45:33,534 --> 00:45:35,536 What you cook in the pot? 818 00:45:35,619 --> 00:45:36,870 Yes. 819 00:45:37,413 --> 00:45:38,956 You get cooked inside the hot pot? 820 00:45:39,039 --> 00:45:40,999 Is it big enough for you to fit? 821 00:45:41,083 --> 00:45:43,335 If I could, I'd get cooked. 822 00:45:43,544 --> 00:45:45,504 We've eaten so many hot pots together. 823 00:45:45,587 --> 00:45:47,464 You know what I mean. 824 00:45:47,673 --> 00:45:49,800 You mean you like hot pot cuisine? 825 00:45:49,883 --> 00:45:51,802 Of course! 826 00:45:51,885 --> 00:45:54,221 Why did you suddenly go so dumb? 827 00:45:54,304 --> 00:45:56,515 You were so persistent, it was scary. 828 00:45:56,849 --> 00:45:58,767 I'll buy some beef. The cow-type. 829 00:45:58,851 --> 00:46:00,519 All beef is cow-type. 830 00:46:00,602 --> 00:46:01,854 You're such an idiot. 831 00:46:02,730 --> 00:46:03,814 That sounds complicated. 832 00:46:03,897 --> 00:46:05,899 Let's have Mongolian hot pot instead. 833 00:46:06,400 --> 00:46:08,777 That's even more complicated! 834 00:46:08,944 --> 00:46:11,071 Do you have a convex metal skillet? 835 00:46:11,155 --> 00:46:13,323 Of course I don't. 836 00:46:13,407 --> 00:46:15,284 I've had enough! 837 00:46:19,038 --> 00:46:21,040 Feeling a bit better? 838 00:46:21,790 --> 00:46:23,042 Yes. 839 00:46:24,209 --> 00:46:25,544 Thank you. 840 00:46:26,211 --> 00:46:27,755 See you later. 841 00:46:27,838 --> 00:46:29,089 Will do. 842 00:46:45,856 --> 00:46:47,816 I want to apologise for three things. 843 00:46:51,070 --> 00:46:52,654 Firstly... 844 00:46:54,948 --> 00:46:56,784 Sorry if it sounded like 845 00:46:56,867 --> 00:46:58,827 I have more important things to do. 846 00:47:01,288 --> 00:47:02,873 Secondly... 847 00:47:04,291 --> 00:47:05,334 Sorry for complaining about 848 00:47:05,417 --> 00:47:08,087 the material when I don't write a thing. 849 00:47:13,342 --> 00:47:14,968 And thirdly... 850 00:47:16,470 --> 00:47:18,639 When you and I... 851 00:47:23,560 --> 00:47:25,437 I didn't... 852 00:47:30,234 --> 00:47:31,735 I am... 853 00:47:31,819 --> 00:47:34,405 Did you forget the third one? 854 00:47:42,579 --> 00:47:45,833 You really are an idiot. 855 00:47:51,672 --> 00:47:53,382 I'm going home. 856 00:47:53,632 --> 00:47:55,467 That's my bicycle. 857 00:47:55,592 --> 00:47:57,094 Liar. 858 00:47:57,594 --> 00:47:59,096 You're leaving? 859 00:48:06,437 --> 00:48:09,189 Come on. Let's make a toast to comedy. 860 00:48:09,273 --> 00:48:11,316 We're good. We're funny... 861 00:48:11,400 --> 00:48:13,277 And we need new careers! 862 00:48:13,819 --> 00:48:14,987 You want to quit? 863 00:48:15,070 --> 00:48:16,947 - It's not my fault you bombed. - I didn't. 864 00:48:17,031 --> 00:48:19,408 And why wear horizontal stripes? You're fat. 865 00:48:19,491 --> 00:48:21,076 - Hide it, baby. - I'm fashionable. 866 00:48:21,160 --> 00:48:22,619 Get some vertical lines. 867 00:48:22,703 --> 00:48:23,954 It's time for 868 00:48:24,038 --> 00:48:26,123 the What-Kind-of-Guy-Do-You-Like Game! 869 00:48:26,915 --> 00:48:27,958 - Let's hear it. - OK. 870 00:48:28,042 --> 00:48:30,002 - I like muscular guys. - Muscular guys? 871 00:48:30,210 --> 00:48:32,004 - Who's next? - He's muscular! 872 00:48:32,087 --> 00:48:34,131 - Any other type? - I like smart guys too. 873 00:48:34,214 --> 00:48:37,051 - Smart guys. - Take that X-axis and Y-axis 874 00:48:37,134 --> 00:48:38,177 and put in a piece of glass. 875 00:48:38,260 --> 00:48:41,221 He's so smart! 876 00:48:41,305 --> 00:48:42,348 He's funny. 877 00:48:42,431 --> 00:48:44,058 I'm having so much fun today. 878 00:48:44,141 --> 00:48:46,560 What's with that accent? 879 00:48:46,643 --> 00:48:48,145 Are you OK? 880 00:48:49,021 --> 00:48:50,230 Yes. 881 00:48:50,314 --> 00:48:52,399 Want to drink something else? 882 00:48:54,860 --> 00:48:57,446 - This drink is pretty bad. - Yeah... 883 00:48:57,529 --> 00:49:00,282 I could ask for a menu if you want. 884 00:49:01,116 --> 00:49:03,577 - I'm fine. - You are? 885 00:49:03,660 --> 00:49:05,579 If you want, I could... 886 00:49:11,210 --> 00:49:13,045 Why are you sitting there? 887 00:49:13,712 --> 00:49:14,880 Why are you sitting there? 888 00:49:14,963 --> 00:49:16,423 I think he doesn't like me. 889 00:49:16,507 --> 00:49:19,259 No, he just likes to hide in his shell. 890 00:49:19,343 --> 00:49:20,928 - Call him Shellboy. - Shellboy. 891 00:49:21,011 --> 00:49:23,681 He acts like he's in junior high. 892 00:49:24,098 --> 00:49:26,392 - Yeah. - But his favourite pastime is 893 00:49:26,475 --> 00:49:28,602 listening in on people. 894 00:49:28,769 --> 00:49:31,438 - Really? - Do you spy on people? 895 00:49:31,522 --> 00:49:32,856 - You do, right? - Yes. 896 00:49:33,565 --> 00:49:35,526 - That sounds really messed up. - He is. 897 00:49:35,609 --> 00:49:37,403 He listens to every noise I make. 898 00:49:37,486 --> 00:49:39,488 What excites you about spying on people? 899 00:49:40,114 --> 00:49:41,615 It's because the subject 900 00:49:41,699 --> 00:49:43,242 produces sounds under the presumption 901 00:49:43,325 --> 00:49:44,952 they won't be heard. 902 00:49:45,035 --> 00:49:47,246 Normally, one wouldn't hear them. 903 00:49:47,413 --> 00:49:48,997 He sounds like a professor. 904 00:49:50,040 --> 00:49:52,000 Take that X-axis and Y-axis, and then... 905 00:49:52,084 --> 00:49:54,420 You can't compete with the professor. 906 00:50:13,313 --> 00:50:15,190 Are you going to be spying tonight too? 907 00:50:15,482 --> 00:50:18,277 Don't spring things like that on me. 908 00:50:18,610 --> 00:50:21,780 If you and I talk only to each other 909 00:50:21,864 --> 00:50:24,575 we'll end up becoming comedy freaks. 910 00:50:24,658 --> 00:50:26,827 We have to talk with other people sometimes. 911 00:50:26,910 --> 00:50:29,913 That's how you figure out who you really are. 912 00:50:29,997 --> 00:50:31,874 - And they laughed. - They laughed at me. 913 00:50:31,957 --> 00:50:33,542 Not with me. 914 00:50:34,585 --> 00:50:36,086 Never let them laugh at you. 915 00:50:36,170 --> 00:50:37,463 You got to make them laugh! 916 00:50:37,546 --> 00:50:40,215 Great words for a comedian to live by. 917 00:50:40,382 --> 00:50:41,508 But that phrase became so famous 918 00:50:41,592 --> 00:50:44,553 it's hard to make people laugh at us. 919 00:50:45,387 --> 00:50:47,348 Now the audience think, he may look dumb 920 00:50:47,431 --> 00:50:48,807 but he's just pretending. 921 00:50:48,891 --> 00:50:50,684 They didn't need to know that. 922 00:50:50,768 --> 00:50:52,353 You're right. 923 00:50:52,561 --> 00:50:54,396 If they watch a show and think 924 00:50:54,480 --> 00:50:56,065 I'm being made to laugh, 925 00:50:56,148 --> 00:50:58,525 that's such a shame. 926 00:50:59,234 --> 00:51:00,861 I guess there's some kind of humour 927 00:51:00,944 --> 00:51:02,571 that could be made with that too. 928 00:51:04,782 --> 00:51:06,033 On the other hand, 929 00:51:06,116 --> 00:51:08,744 you've no idea what's really funny about you. 930 00:51:08,827 --> 00:51:10,287 That is funny. 931 00:51:10,371 --> 00:51:12,456 Shut up. I'm not really stupid. 932 00:51:33,102 --> 00:51:34,561 Mr Kamiya... 933 00:51:36,355 --> 00:51:40,275 You and Maki are a couple, right? 934 00:51:40,359 --> 00:51:42,861 No. She just lets me live there. 935 00:51:52,246 --> 00:51:54,707 But since you live together 936 00:51:55,124 --> 00:51:58,127 won't the subject of getting together come up? 937 00:51:58,544 --> 00:52:00,379 It did a couple of times. 938 00:52:00,462 --> 00:52:03,132 But I told her to get a proper boyfriend. 939 00:52:03,841 --> 00:52:05,718 What did she say? 940 00:52:05,801 --> 00:52:07,219 "OK." 941 00:52:11,223 --> 00:52:13,434 There's something I don't like about that. 942 00:52:15,436 --> 00:52:17,187 Don't you like her? 943 00:52:18,605 --> 00:52:20,691 Well, I don't pay any rent 944 00:52:20,774 --> 00:52:22,401 and she does so much for me. 945 00:52:22,484 --> 00:52:24,778 I want to do the right thing by her. 946 00:52:25,195 --> 00:52:26,739 If anybody dated me seriously 947 00:52:26,822 --> 00:52:28,449 it would be hell for them. 948 00:52:29,908 --> 00:52:32,369 - You're right. - Don't agree with me. 949 00:52:34,538 --> 00:52:38,042 The train is arriving at Kichijouji Station. 950 00:52:38,125 --> 00:52:39,710 You have work early tomorrow? 951 00:52:39,793 --> 00:52:42,629 No. Not that early. 952 00:52:42,713 --> 00:52:44,840 OK. Let's grab a few more drinks 953 00:52:44,923 --> 00:52:46,341 at Harmonica Alley. 954 00:52:46,425 --> 00:52:48,302 OK. Let's do that. 955 00:52:48,844 --> 00:52:50,804 Maki's paying for the drinks. 956 00:52:52,306 --> 00:52:56,101 Every time I tell her I'm going out with you 957 00:52:56,185 --> 00:52:58,103 she gives me money. 958 00:52:58,437 --> 00:53:01,565 So, she thinks you and I go out every night. 959 00:53:12,368 --> 00:53:17,373 Kichijouji Station 960 00:53:28,425 --> 00:53:31,011 Old man Lester died. 961 00:53:31,595 --> 00:53:33,931 - Who killed him? - Ask him yourself. 962 00:53:34,348 --> 00:53:36,433 A bath? Don't tell me what to do! 963 00:53:36,517 --> 00:53:38,769 - Stop complaining. - Get out of here. 964 00:53:38,852 --> 00:53:40,729 You were talking to him? 965 00:53:41,480 --> 00:53:44,024 The toughest gang in Japan. 966 00:53:44,108 --> 00:53:46,151 He doesn't have enough time left. 967 00:53:49,613 --> 00:53:50,656 Are you OK? 968 00:53:51,448 --> 00:53:53,617 Don't cry. Let me clean you up. 969 00:53:53,701 --> 00:53:56,036 We all have our problems. 970 00:53:56,120 --> 00:53:57,287 Coming again tomorrow? 971 00:53:57,371 --> 00:53:59,248 Of course you are. Off you go. 972 00:53:59,331 --> 00:54:01,917 It's nobody's fault... 973 00:54:02,876 --> 00:54:03,919 Enough with the tears. 974 00:54:04,002 --> 00:54:06,046 We'll see you tomorrow, right? 975 00:54:06,296 --> 00:54:07,965 OK. Bye. 976 00:54:40,873 --> 00:54:42,207 Welcome. 977 00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:49,673 Good morning. Sorry I'm late. 978 00:54:50,007 --> 00:54:53,302 Mr Kamiya, where are we going to drink today? 979 00:54:53,385 --> 00:54:55,804 I need your advice on some things... 980 00:54:55,888 --> 00:54:57,514 That's not it. 981 00:54:57,598 --> 00:54:58,891 OK. What is it? 982 00:54:58,974 --> 00:55:00,225 Well... 983 00:55:00,309 --> 00:55:02,019 I have to get my stuff from Maki's place. 984 00:55:02,102 --> 00:55:03,437 Can you help me? 985 00:55:03,520 --> 00:55:05,147 OK. Of course. 986 00:55:05,230 --> 00:55:07,232 Did you have a fight? 987 00:55:08,359 --> 00:55:10,069 - Maki... - Yes. 988 00:55:10,277 --> 00:55:11,904 She got a boyfriend. 989 00:55:11,987 --> 00:55:13,447 Are you serious? 990 00:55:13,530 --> 00:55:16,075 It was a real surprise. 991 00:55:16,408 --> 00:55:18,035 She said she was working 992 00:55:18,118 --> 00:55:20,204 - As a hostess in a bar, right? - Yes. 993 00:55:20,579 --> 00:55:21,955 The truth is 994 00:55:22,039 --> 00:55:24,291 it was a brothel. 995 00:55:25,042 --> 00:55:26,335 When she first came to Tokyo 996 00:55:26,418 --> 00:55:28,003 she was walking around Shibuya. 997 00:55:28,087 --> 00:55:30,798 Some guy offered her a job as a hostess. 998 00:55:31,090 --> 00:55:33,467 She went to the interview a few days later 999 00:55:33,550 --> 00:55:34,927 turns out... 1000 00:55:35,010 --> 00:55:36,303 it was for a brothel with a theme 1001 00:55:36,387 --> 00:55:38,931 where the girls dress up as ghosts. 1002 00:55:39,890 --> 00:55:42,685 You know how she can't say no. 1003 00:55:42,976 --> 00:55:45,270 So she was working there. 1004 00:55:51,568 --> 00:55:55,906 I've come to suck your blood. 1005 00:56:04,081 --> 00:56:06,166 Why are you looking gloomy? 1006 00:56:06,250 --> 00:56:07,584 Sorry. 1007 00:56:07,710 --> 00:56:09,670 But if Maki found someone nice 1008 00:56:09,753 --> 00:56:11,505 I can't complain. 1009 00:56:11,588 --> 00:56:13,006 She's not getting any younger. 1010 00:56:13,090 --> 00:56:14,967 I wish I could've done something for her 1011 00:56:15,050 --> 00:56:17,261 but I ran out of time. 1012 00:56:17,803 --> 00:56:19,388 And it wouldn't be right 1013 00:56:19,471 --> 00:56:21,223 to complicate things now. 1014 00:56:21,765 --> 00:56:25,644 I think she didn't have a choice. 1015 00:56:29,356 --> 00:56:32,526 So you're taking all of your stuff? 1016 00:56:32,651 --> 00:56:35,320 No. I don't have a place yet. 1017 00:56:35,612 --> 00:56:37,656 But I've got a gig tomorrow. 1018 00:56:37,740 --> 00:56:38,782 I just need my manzai outfit 1019 00:56:38,866 --> 00:56:40,868 and a change of clothes. 1020 00:56:41,326 --> 00:56:44,997 - But there's just one problem. - What is it? 1021 00:56:45,456 --> 00:56:48,834 The thing is, the guy's already in the house. 1022 00:56:49,001 --> 00:56:50,044 He is? 1023 00:56:50,502 --> 00:56:51,712 Apparently, she told him 1024 00:56:51,795 --> 00:56:54,298 I was just crashing on the couch. 1025 00:56:54,381 --> 00:56:55,674 But it's going to be so awkward. 1026 00:56:55,758 --> 00:56:56,925 I can't do it alone. 1027 00:56:57,009 --> 00:56:58,302 You're right. 1028 00:56:58,385 --> 00:57:01,805 Imagine if I went to get my stuff by myself. 1029 00:57:01,889 --> 00:57:03,682 If he started to bark at me 1030 00:57:03,766 --> 00:57:05,351 I might kill him. 1031 00:57:05,434 --> 00:57:06,769 So I want you to come. 1032 00:57:06,852 --> 00:57:09,021 It's easier to kill him with my help. 1033 00:57:09,104 --> 00:57:10,522 No, stop me! 1034 00:57:10,606 --> 00:57:12,358 You're supposed to stop me. 1035 00:57:22,284 --> 00:57:23,744 No. 1036 00:57:24,244 --> 00:57:25,537 I can't go inside. 1037 00:57:26,789 --> 00:57:28,082 Shall I go by myself? 1038 00:57:28,874 --> 00:57:31,418 No, I'll go with you. 1039 00:57:31,502 --> 00:57:33,337 And no matter what he says 1040 00:57:33,420 --> 00:57:35,172 I'll keep quiet. For Maki. 1041 00:57:36,298 --> 00:57:39,510 But I don't want to get sad or feel pathetic. 1042 00:57:39,593 --> 00:57:43,305 When we get inside, I want you... 1043 00:57:43,389 --> 00:57:45,307 to have a boner. 1044 00:57:46,934 --> 00:57:48,769 - You want me to have a boner? - Yeah. 1045 00:57:49,603 --> 00:57:51,355 If I start to lose it 1046 00:57:51,438 --> 00:57:53,399 I'll just look at your crotch. 1047 00:57:53,482 --> 00:57:55,150 My heart will be breaking 1048 00:57:55,234 --> 00:57:57,194 and you'll have a boner. That's funny. 1049 00:57:57,277 --> 00:57:59,238 It'll help me keep my cool. 1050 00:57:59,363 --> 00:58:01,740 Isn't that too risky for me? 1051 00:58:02,116 --> 00:58:04,201 If the guy notices, he'll punch me. 1052 00:58:04,284 --> 00:58:05,661 No questions asked. 1053 00:58:05,744 --> 00:58:08,080 That's a unique reason to get punched. 1054 00:58:08,163 --> 00:58:09,915 A nice question to ask on a quiz show 1055 00:58:09,998 --> 00:58:12,209 when you're famous. How did he get that scar? 1056 00:58:12,292 --> 00:58:15,129 They won't ask that! And boners? 1057 00:58:15,212 --> 00:58:16,755 You know I don't like dirty jokes. 1058 00:58:16,839 --> 00:58:19,007 - Me neither. - Then why? 1059 00:58:19,091 --> 00:58:21,260 - Why did you say it? - Please. 1060 00:58:21,343 --> 00:58:23,303 You can at least try. 1061 00:58:25,389 --> 00:58:26,890 OK. 1062 00:58:44,241 --> 00:58:45,743 Coming. 1063 00:58:48,203 --> 00:58:50,664 Oh, it's Tokunaga. 1064 00:58:50,748 --> 00:58:52,124 Thanks for this. 1065 00:59:02,092 --> 00:59:03,761 You'll regret this! 1066 00:59:19,777 --> 00:59:21,445 Sorry to impose on you. 1067 00:59:50,808 --> 00:59:53,268 I packed most of what I need. 1068 00:59:53,352 --> 00:59:55,813 Could you throw the rest away? 1069 00:59:57,523 --> 01:00:00,234 I'll clean up and send what I can. 1070 01:00:18,836 --> 01:00:21,046 I hate you, man. 1071 01:00:52,036 --> 01:00:53,078 So, I'm going. 1072 01:01:05,841 --> 01:01:07,551 Sorry for everything. 1073 01:01:08,469 --> 01:01:10,220 Thanks. 1074 01:01:14,683 --> 01:01:16,560 Look after yourself. 1075 01:01:20,439 --> 01:01:21,690 That's enough. 1076 01:01:48,717 --> 01:01:51,345 Why are you crying with a boner? 1077 01:01:51,428 --> 01:01:53,305 You're like a baby with a sex drive. 1078 01:01:53,389 --> 01:01:55,349 You made me do it. 1079 01:01:55,432 --> 01:01:57,726 And I saw you touch yourself. 1080 01:01:57,810 --> 01:01:59,770 - That's cheating. - Why is that? 1081 01:01:59,853 --> 01:02:01,480 I had no choice. 1082 01:02:01,897 --> 01:02:02,940 I respect my mentor. 1083 01:02:03,023 --> 01:02:04,900 His girlfriend was nice to me. 1084 01:02:04,983 --> 01:02:06,735 And they're breaking up. 1085 01:02:07,361 --> 01:02:08,404 In a situation like that 1086 01:02:08,487 --> 01:02:10,864 grainy pictures aren't enough. 1087 01:02:12,491 --> 01:02:14,368 I don't have it anymore. 1088 01:02:23,627 --> 01:02:25,838 Let's eat something good. 1089 01:02:25,921 --> 01:02:27,548 - Sure. - OK? 1090 01:02:27,631 --> 01:02:30,050 What do you want? Chinese? 1091 01:02:30,134 --> 01:02:31,927 Japanese? 1092 01:02:32,094 --> 01:02:34,013 Barbecue? 1093 01:02:48,318 --> 01:02:50,154 Is your scalp OK? 1094 01:02:50,446 --> 01:02:52,072 - Yes. - Really? 1095 01:02:52,156 --> 01:02:53,782 You're tough. 1096 01:03:01,874 --> 01:03:03,625 What do you do? 1097 01:03:04,626 --> 01:03:06,670 I'm a comedian. 1098 01:03:06,754 --> 01:03:09,089 Wow. You want to be a comedian? 1099 01:03:09,173 --> 01:03:10,632 I've got a friend 1100 01:03:10,716 --> 01:03:12,676 that goes to a comedy school too. 1101 01:03:13,177 --> 01:03:15,804 Wow. Really? 1102 01:03:28,442 --> 01:03:30,319 It's their first time on the show. 1103 01:03:30,402 --> 01:03:32,613 They are Sparks. Go for it! 1104 01:03:39,995 --> 01:03:42,456 - Hello! - We are Sparks. 1105 01:03:42,539 --> 01:03:43,707 I'm Yamashita. 1106 01:03:43,874 --> 01:03:45,292 I'm Tokunaga. 1107 01:03:45,376 --> 01:03:47,669 My favourite pastime is stepping on ants. 1108 01:03:48,462 --> 01:03:50,631 Don't say creepy stuff in a cheery tone. 1109 01:03:51,006 --> 01:03:52,966 Thank you! 1110 01:03:53,050 --> 01:03:54,968 Mr Shikatani, the way you danced was cute. 1111 01:03:55,052 --> 01:03:56,178 - But... - But? 1112 01:03:56,261 --> 01:03:58,055 I don't think you're cut out for 1113 01:03:58,138 --> 01:03:59,348 the champion's throne. 1114 01:03:59,431 --> 01:04:02,059 You bet, it's literally hurting my butt. 1115 01:04:22,663 --> 01:04:25,040 That year, we were invited to do gigs 1116 01:04:25,124 --> 01:04:27,751 at school festivals all over the country. 1117 01:04:27,835 --> 01:04:30,129 Raise your hand when you're done. 1118 01:04:30,212 --> 01:04:31,422 So, everyone's ready? 1119 01:04:31,505 --> 01:04:33,757 Great. Let me choose. 1120 01:04:33,841 --> 01:04:35,467 Let's hear from Sparks. 1121 01:04:35,551 --> 01:04:37,094 What's the worst-selling product 1122 01:04:37,177 --> 01:04:38,220 at the school store? 1123 01:04:38,303 --> 01:04:39,596 The 25,000-colour ballpoint pen. 1124 01:04:39,680 --> 01:04:40,723 That many colours? 1125 01:04:40,806 --> 01:04:42,808 - Who's next? - Me... 1126 01:04:42,891 --> 01:04:45,644 OK, let's hear from Red Spider. 1127 01:04:46,645 --> 01:04:47,896 They sure are popular. 1128 01:04:48,564 --> 01:04:49,606 It was the brief flash of popularity 1129 01:04:49,690 --> 01:04:51,859 only young comedians enjoy. 1130 01:04:51,942 --> 01:04:54,069 I think every comedian on TV 1131 01:04:54,153 --> 01:04:55,988 understood how it worked. 1132 01:04:56,572 --> 01:04:58,157 We were too old to fool ourselves 1133 01:04:58,240 --> 01:05:00,325 into thinking we were stars. 1134 01:05:00,784 --> 01:05:02,619 We even took on the role of villain. 1135 01:05:02,703 --> 01:05:04,038 We acted like fools who thought 1136 01:05:04,121 --> 01:05:06,165 they were stars, just for the negativity. 1137 01:05:06,248 --> 01:05:07,332 That's how old we were. 1138 01:05:07,416 --> 01:05:09,793 So if you want to get rid of a zombie 1139 01:05:09,877 --> 01:05:11,962 stick a flashlight in their face. 1140 01:05:12,046 --> 01:05:13,589 - They hate light? - That's how it works. 1141 01:05:13,672 --> 01:05:14,715 I see. 1142 01:05:17,676 --> 01:05:21,764 Aicom Personal Loans 1143 01:05:37,738 --> 01:05:38,781 What? 1144 01:05:39,323 --> 01:05:41,658 I have three jokes to live. 1145 01:05:44,286 --> 01:05:45,788 What? 1146 01:05:46,705 --> 01:05:48,165 I've heard of three years to live. 1147 01:05:48,248 --> 01:05:51,335 Is three jokes to live something like that? 1148 01:05:51,543 --> 01:05:54,213 If I make three more jokes, I'm going to die. 1149 01:05:54,296 --> 01:05:55,631 How did that happen? 1150 01:05:55,714 --> 01:05:57,049 It's an occupational disease. 1151 01:05:57,174 --> 01:05:58,592 - Idiot. - It hurts. 1152 01:05:59,176 --> 01:06:02,012 - Why did you... - I don't want you to die. 1153 01:06:02,096 --> 01:06:04,223 So I'll teach you how to deal with zombies 1154 01:06:04,306 --> 01:06:06,809 and you're going to listen. OK? Please? 1155 01:06:06,892 --> 01:06:08,936 You're scarier than a zombie. 1156 01:06:18,487 --> 01:06:20,614 And finally, a word to my dear parents. 1157 01:06:20,698 --> 01:06:23,158 The guy next to me with the moon face 1158 01:06:23,242 --> 01:06:24,410 hopes we'll be as happy as you two. 1159 01:06:24,493 --> 01:06:26,120 Use my name! I've had enough. 1160 01:06:30,708 --> 01:06:32,543 Thank you! 1161 01:06:32,626 --> 01:06:34,336 That was the second act 1162 01:06:34,420 --> 01:06:36,338 from Mr and Mrs Plump. 1163 01:06:36,422 --> 01:06:38,257 They sure were funny. 1164 01:06:39,383 --> 01:06:41,677 And now for our next duo. 1165 01:06:41,760 --> 01:06:43,512 The act they did in the first round 1166 01:06:43,595 --> 01:06:46,098 had you rolling in the aisles. 1167 01:06:46,181 --> 01:06:48,434 Let's hear it for Ahondara! 1168 01:06:49,226 --> 01:06:50,811 You love them! 1169 01:06:50,894 --> 01:06:55,274 What will their second act be like? 1170 01:06:56,108 --> 01:06:58,652 Ahondara, come on down! 1171 01:07:06,618 --> 01:07:08,162 Hello. We are Ahondara. 1172 01:07:08,620 --> 01:07:09,663 We hope you enjoy the show. 1173 01:07:09,747 --> 01:07:11,707 Sorry if we look a bit scary. 1174 01:07:11,790 --> 01:07:14,126 I have three jokes to live. 1175 01:07:15,002 --> 01:07:16,420 What? 1176 01:07:16,712 --> 01:07:19,590 I have three jokes to live. 1177 01:07:21,425 --> 01:07:23,052 What? 1178 01:07:23,844 --> 01:07:26,263 What does three jokes to live mean? 1179 01:07:26,347 --> 01:07:29,391 If I make three more jokes, I'm going to die. 1180 01:07:29,683 --> 01:07:31,268 What kind of illness is that? 1181 01:07:31,352 --> 01:07:33,604 It's an occupational disease. 1182 01:07:33,687 --> 01:07:34,897 I've got Stage IV. 1183 01:07:34,980 --> 01:07:36,982 Oh, maybe I shouldn't talk about my stage 1184 01:07:37,066 --> 01:07:38,192 on this stage. 1185 01:07:38,275 --> 01:07:41,403 Who would've guessed I'd die like this? 1186 01:07:41,487 --> 01:07:43,197 What are you talking about? 1187 01:07:43,280 --> 01:07:44,323 My doctor told me I'd die 1188 01:07:44,406 --> 01:07:46,325 if I made three more jokes! 1189 01:07:46,992 --> 01:07:48,535 Do you know how that feels? 1190 01:07:48,619 --> 01:07:49,870 Hey! Boys! 1191 01:07:49,953 --> 01:07:52,581 If you want to lip-synch, do it properly! 1192 01:07:52,664 --> 01:07:53,832 That's not manzai! 1193 01:07:53,916 --> 01:07:55,709 They really are idiots. 1194 01:07:55,793 --> 01:07:57,711 Your first round was funny. 1195 01:07:57,795 --> 01:07:59,254 You're ruining everything. 1196 01:07:59,338 --> 01:08:01,131 What a mess! 1197 01:08:01,590 --> 01:08:03,842 So, we've seen all of the duos 1198 01:08:03,926 --> 01:08:06,512 perform two acts each. 1199 01:08:06,595 --> 01:08:08,931 Let's hear what the judges thought! 1200 01:08:09,014 --> 01:08:12,142 It sure was a fun contest. 1201 01:08:12,434 --> 01:08:13,936 Unfortunately, 1202 01:08:14,144 --> 01:08:16,605 a certain duo used sound effects 1203 01:08:16,689 --> 01:08:20,109 in an act that definitely wasn't manzai. 1204 01:08:21,276 --> 01:08:23,028 If we exclude them 1205 01:08:23,112 --> 01:08:25,739 I think we can say 1206 01:08:25,823 --> 01:08:27,700 we saw contestants of high caliber tonight. 1207 01:08:28,992 --> 01:08:30,786 The audience seemed to like Ahondara... 1208 01:08:30,869 --> 01:08:31,912 They may have gotten some laughs 1209 01:08:31,995 --> 01:08:34,707 but we don't call that manzai. 1210 01:08:35,499 --> 01:08:38,335 I see. Well, that sounds quite final. 1211 01:08:38,419 --> 01:08:39,712 However, I'd like to say 1212 01:08:39,795 --> 01:08:42,589 the contest is becoming better each year. 1213 01:08:42,881 --> 01:08:45,134 I'm sure several of the duos today 1214 01:08:45,217 --> 01:08:47,761 have quite a bright future. 1215 01:08:49,847 --> 01:08:51,849 Did you hear that, folks? 1216 01:08:52,349 --> 01:08:55,185 Sounds like the big time! 1217 01:09:01,400 --> 01:09:04,945 We don't have any TV gigs lately. 1218 01:09:09,950 --> 01:09:12,619 A TV director said he likes our material 1219 01:09:12,703 --> 01:09:15,372 but we need more than that to succeed on TV. 1220 01:09:20,711 --> 01:09:22,463 You say, if we're funny, we're fine. 1221 01:09:22,546 --> 01:09:24,590 But being funny isn't enough. 1222 01:09:26,467 --> 01:09:27,509 Maybe you've taken too much 1223 01:09:27,593 --> 01:09:29,053 of Mr Kamiya's advice. 1224 01:09:30,387 --> 01:09:32,431 I think our old stuff was funnier. 1225 01:09:41,023 --> 01:09:43,484 Mr Kamiya doesn't want to be big. 1226 01:09:47,946 --> 01:09:50,115 Mr Kamiya has never turned his back on 1227 01:09:50,199 --> 01:09:52,201 what he thinks is funny. 1228 01:09:54,745 --> 01:09:56,872 Comedians might find him funny 1229 01:09:56,955 --> 01:09:59,833 but comedy has to be simple. 1230 01:09:59,917 --> 01:10:02,044 We do manzai for the general public. 1231 01:10:02,127 --> 01:10:03,962 We don't do manzai for comedians. 1232 01:10:04,463 --> 01:10:07,800 Mr Kamiya's main concern isn't the public. 1233 01:10:08,342 --> 01:10:09,885 It's whether he can make something 1234 01:10:09,968 --> 01:10:11,595 the public can't ignore. 1235 01:10:12,096 --> 01:10:13,639 What's that? 1236 01:10:14,056 --> 01:10:16,183 He's just running away from the public. 1237 01:10:16,266 --> 01:10:17,768 Am I wrong? 1238 01:10:20,312 --> 01:10:23,107 You don't understand a thing about Mr Kamiya! 1239 01:10:50,300 --> 01:10:51,969 All these years in Tokyo 1240 01:10:52,052 --> 01:10:53,929 we still can't afford a place with a shower. 1241 01:12:11,465 --> 01:12:14,259 Please take a copy. 1242 01:12:14,885 --> 01:12:16,136 - See you! - Infinity will... 1243 01:12:16,220 --> 01:12:18,097 See you! Infinity will change infinitely. 1244 01:12:18,180 --> 01:12:20,265 I have no idea what you're saying. 1245 01:12:21,016 --> 01:12:22,351 Let's go once more. 1246 01:12:24,520 --> 01:12:26,105 When kick boxers and gamblers 1247 01:12:26,188 --> 01:12:27,481 lose their cool, it's over. 1248 01:12:27,564 --> 01:12:28,607 I've had enough. 1249 01:12:28,691 --> 01:12:30,484 Thank you. 1250 01:12:38,325 --> 01:12:39,952 - Hello. - Hello! 1251 01:12:40,035 --> 01:12:42,454 We are Sparks. Hope you enjoy the show. 1252 01:12:42,538 --> 01:12:43,831 I couldn't see any light 1253 01:12:43,914 --> 01:12:45,708 at the end of the tunnel. 1254 01:12:45,791 --> 01:12:48,085 I felt guilty for reasons I couldn't fathom. 1255 01:12:48,168 --> 01:12:50,337 I was stricken with fear too. 1256 01:12:50,421 --> 01:12:51,797 But I gave it all I had. 1257 01:12:51,880 --> 01:12:53,882 ... zombie attacks, three nights in a row? 1258 01:12:53,966 --> 01:12:55,259 What's with you? 1259 01:13:03,809 --> 01:13:08,647 Kamiya's Biography Volume 7 1260 01:13:24,705 --> 01:13:26,290 Hello. 1261 01:13:29,960 --> 01:13:31,754 How are things? 1262 01:13:32,546 --> 01:13:34,048 - Here's your beer. - Thanks. 1263 01:13:34,131 --> 01:13:36,550 Nothing has changed. 1264 01:13:36,675 --> 01:13:38,802 I only got 18,000 yen this month. 1265 01:13:40,304 --> 01:13:42,514 But Mr Ohbayashi... 1266 01:13:42,598 --> 01:13:44,183 You're not wearing a white suit today. 1267 01:13:44,266 --> 01:13:46,685 I've never worn one. 1268 01:13:46,977 --> 01:13:48,479 Did you leave your cane on the bus? 1269 01:13:48,562 --> 01:13:50,189 No, I didn't. 1270 01:13:50,272 --> 01:13:53,192 Why do you always think I'm Colonel Sanders? 1271 01:13:53,484 --> 01:13:55,569 - What's so funny? - Here's your yakitori. 1272 01:13:55,652 --> 01:13:57,112 Thanks. 1273 01:14:03,994 --> 01:14:05,704 - Have you heard? - Heard what? 1274 01:14:05,788 --> 01:14:07,081 Kamiya is in so much debt 1275 01:14:07,164 --> 01:14:09,333 he's about to go under. 1276 01:14:09,833 --> 01:14:11,668 Really? He is? 1277 01:14:12,419 --> 01:14:16,173 He tries to look good when he's with you. 1278 01:14:16,256 --> 01:14:19,385 Well, that's part of what makes him funny. 1279 01:14:20,135 --> 01:14:23,138 But he might have to quit manzai. 1280 01:14:25,099 --> 01:14:28,185 I'm sorry. He always pays for me. 1281 01:14:28,435 --> 01:14:30,938 I'll try to stop him 1282 01:14:31,021 --> 01:14:33,816 from using so much money from now on. 1283 01:14:34,024 --> 01:14:36,110 It's not your fault. 1284 01:14:37,152 --> 01:14:38,570 He always looks so happy 1285 01:14:38,654 --> 01:14:40,239 when he talks about you. 1286 01:14:46,870 --> 01:14:49,540 Wouldn't it be nice to be big? 1287 01:14:49,665 --> 01:14:51,166 It would. 1288 01:15:00,926 --> 01:15:02,678 Shikatani's on again. 1289 01:15:05,723 --> 01:15:08,767 I see him everywhere lately. 1290 01:15:09,601 --> 01:15:10,894 Bean's Coffee for successful men 1291 01:15:10,978 --> 01:15:14,106 We've created nearly a hundred acts of manzai. 1292 01:15:15,482 --> 01:15:17,109 Even so, Shikatani was probably born 1293 01:15:17,192 --> 01:15:18,861 with a head start on us. 1294 01:15:52,311 --> 01:15:53,729 Tokunaga? 1295 01:15:54,229 --> 01:15:55,731 What's up? 1296 01:15:55,814 --> 01:15:57,566 It's been a while. Let's have dinner. 1297 01:16:07,743 --> 01:16:09,161 Howdy. 1298 01:16:09,244 --> 01:16:10,662 Hell... 1299 01:16:14,124 --> 01:16:15,292 They bleach your hair 1300 01:16:15,376 --> 01:16:17,127 before making it blonde, right? 1301 01:16:17,211 --> 01:16:18,837 It really hurt my scalp. 1302 01:16:20,964 --> 01:16:22,508 Let's eat. 1303 01:16:23,592 --> 01:16:25,469 I'm OK. 1304 01:16:25,928 --> 01:16:28,055 Don't say that. Come with me. 1305 01:16:28,138 --> 01:16:30,349 It's ready, and she's waiting. 1306 01:16:47,449 --> 01:16:49,201 I've seen him on TV! 1307 01:16:50,327 --> 01:16:51,912 I'm Tokunaga, from Sparks. 1308 01:16:52,371 --> 01:16:55,249 - I told you we were friends. - Awesome! 1309 01:16:55,332 --> 01:16:56,667 Come on in. 1310 01:16:59,878 --> 01:17:01,046 Ta-da. 1311 01:17:01,130 --> 01:17:02,464 We have dumplings too. 1312 01:17:02,548 --> 01:17:04,425 - He loves dumplings. - Really? 1313 01:17:04,508 --> 01:17:06,927 I do love dumplings. 1314 01:17:07,469 --> 01:17:09,054 How many shall I cook? 1315 01:17:09,138 --> 01:17:11,515 I'll put them in the next round. 1316 01:17:13,183 --> 01:17:15,602 - Are you on a diet? - No... 1317 01:17:16,437 --> 01:17:19,982 Look. Sparks is on. Awesome! 1318 01:17:20,065 --> 01:17:22,151 - You're right. - I'm right? 1319 01:17:22,234 --> 01:17:24,319 I need to practise, in case I end up 1320 01:17:24,445 --> 01:17:26,196 - With a dumb girlfriend. - Not so fast. 1321 01:17:26,280 --> 01:17:28,574 Don't date dumb girls in the first place. 1322 01:17:28,991 --> 01:17:30,159 You're not at liberty 1323 01:17:30,242 --> 01:17:31,452 to steal my romantic liberty. 1324 01:17:31,535 --> 01:17:33,412 That's too many liberties. 1325 01:17:33,495 --> 01:17:35,039 Maybe you're right. 1326 01:17:35,122 --> 01:17:36,915 Let me do it. 1327 01:17:36,999 --> 01:17:38,208 Settle down. 1328 01:17:38,292 --> 01:17:40,044 Why? 1329 01:18:05,235 --> 01:18:08,238 We lost in the next episode. 1330 01:18:15,287 --> 01:18:17,039 Can you pass the skimmer? 1331 01:18:19,249 --> 01:18:21,418 What did you think, Mr Kamiya? 1332 01:18:22,461 --> 01:18:24,338 About our act. 1333 01:18:26,048 --> 01:18:27,966 Well... 1334 01:18:28,592 --> 01:18:30,969 I think you should do what you really 1335 01:18:31,053 --> 01:18:32,596 want to do. 1336 01:18:34,682 --> 01:18:36,433 I can't. 1337 01:18:50,864 --> 01:18:52,783 I'll go to the store. 1338 01:18:52,866 --> 01:18:54,702 I'll get some beer. 1339 01:19:08,507 --> 01:19:10,592 You didn't think it was funny. 1340 01:19:11,844 --> 01:19:13,429 Our act. 1341 01:19:15,180 --> 01:19:18,434 It's not that it wasn't funny. 1342 01:19:19,226 --> 01:19:22,021 I know you're funny. 1343 01:19:22,104 --> 01:19:24,982 That's why I think you can do more. 1344 01:19:26,316 --> 01:19:28,986 Why don't you do it then? 1345 01:19:31,822 --> 01:19:34,491 If you're going to complain 1346 01:19:36,160 --> 01:19:39,079 why don't you go for auditions? Go on TV. 1347 01:19:39,288 --> 01:19:42,249 Do funny manzai yourself! 1348 01:19:44,334 --> 01:19:45,878 Good point. 1349 01:19:49,590 --> 01:19:51,759 There are things you have. 1350 01:19:51,842 --> 01:19:53,802 I do too. 1351 01:19:54,053 --> 01:19:56,430 And we're not the only ones. 1352 01:19:58,140 --> 01:20:00,559 All comedians have them. 1353 01:20:02,644 --> 01:20:04,229 We all have things and ideas 1354 01:20:04,313 --> 01:20:06,106 that we think are really funny. 1355 01:20:06,940 --> 01:20:09,860 But you have to convey those ideas. 1356 01:20:11,945 --> 01:20:14,406 If you don't put in the effort... 1357 01:20:19,578 --> 01:20:21,789 If you don't put in the effort 1358 01:20:21,872 --> 01:20:24,541 the things you think are funny... 1359 01:20:24,917 --> 01:20:27,127 will cease to exist. 1360 01:20:31,048 --> 01:20:33,217 Maybe you're thinking too much. 1361 01:20:33,842 --> 01:20:35,844 Loosen up. Just do what you want... 1362 01:20:35,928 --> 01:20:37,846 I would, if it were a hobby. 1363 01:20:38,806 --> 01:20:41,433 If it were just a hobby, that'd be fine. 1364 01:20:42,601 --> 01:20:45,396 But if you don't put in the effort... 1365 01:20:46,397 --> 01:20:48,691 you won't be able to do the manzai... 1366 01:20:49,191 --> 01:20:51,276 you love so much. 1367 01:20:51,360 --> 01:20:53,445 You can't just not put in effort! 1368 01:20:53,529 --> 01:20:54,988 Mr Kamiya! 1369 01:21:00,035 --> 01:21:03,205 There are things I don't want to compromise. 1370 01:21:03,288 --> 01:21:05,833 I don't want to let them slide away. 1371 01:21:06,291 --> 01:21:10,421 So I use a skimmer with smaller holes. 1372 01:21:12,423 --> 01:21:14,216 But when I do that... 1373 01:21:14,299 --> 01:21:16,385 When I have smaller holes 1374 01:21:16,468 --> 01:21:18,345 I catch a lot of crap too. 1375 01:21:18,429 --> 01:21:21,056 But I can throw that crap away 1376 01:21:21,140 --> 01:21:23,142 whenever I want. 1377 01:21:24,893 --> 01:21:26,103 Stop being proud of the fact 1378 01:21:26,186 --> 01:21:28,439 you throw crap away. 1379 01:21:39,324 --> 01:21:42,244 You copied my hairstyle, right? 1380 01:21:43,162 --> 01:21:44,705 And my clothes. 1381 01:21:44,788 --> 01:21:46,749 You're copying me, right? 1382 01:21:50,961 --> 01:21:52,254 Imitating somebody was the one thing 1383 01:21:52,337 --> 01:21:55,090 you said you would never do. 1384 01:21:55,924 --> 01:21:58,427 You boasted that you wouldn't even 1385 01:21:58,510 --> 01:22:01,722 do something you'd done yourself. 1386 01:22:04,975 --> 01:22:07,811 Isn't this an imitation? 1387 01:22:13,108 --> 01:22:15,235 I saw your hairstyle 1388 01:22:16,153 --> 01:22:18,364 and thought it was cool. 1389 01:22:24,536 --> 01:22:27,081 It's nothing but an imitation. 1390 01:22:37,841 --> 01:22:39,426 I have to pee. 1391 01:23:05,869 --> 01:23:07,663 Oh, my. 1392 01:23:07,746 --> 01:23:08,789 I wanted to look like Beckham 1393 01:23:08,872 --> 01:23:10,833 but I ended up like Woodstock. 1394 01:23:15,087 --> 01:23:18,215 You don't even look like Woody Woodpecker. 1395 01:23:18,799 --> 01:23:20,551 Is it that bad? 1396 01:23:21,593 --> 01:23:24,513 Who do I look like? Give me a name. 1397 01:23:26,098 --> 01:23:27,558 Come on. 1398 01:23:27,808 --> 01:23:29,101 Come on. 1399 01:23:29,476 --> 01:23:31,061 Give me a name. 1400 01:23:53,375 --> 01:23:54,918 Oh, yes 1401 01:24:10,934 --> 01:24:13,145 It's leftover pizza. You can have it. 1402 01:24:13,479 --> 01:24:15,105 Thanks. 1403 01:24:15,189 --> 01:24:17,149 It's all cold and congealed by now though. 1404 01:24:43,175 --> 01:24:45,260 I might have another coffee. 1405 01:24:46,387 --> 01:24:48,013 Do you want one? 1406 01:24:48,097 --> 01:24:49,431 No, thanks. 1407 01:25:11,412 --> 01:25:13,789 - Do you have 20 yen? - You don't? 1408 01:25:20,546 --> 01:25:22,381 You're wearing cool clothes today. 1409 01:25:22,464 --> 01:25:24,216 Where did you get them? 1410 01:25:24,299 --> 01:25:26,468 I thought you wanted to talk. 1411 01:25:30,597 --> 01:25:32,016 I do. 1412 01:25:32,808 --> 01:25:34,977 What is it? 1413 01:25:39,982 --> 01:25:43,360 I don't think we're going anywhere. 1414 01:25:44,069 --> 01:25:46,530 And new acts keep coming out. 1415 01:25:49,742 --> 01:25:51,368 We can try a bit more. 1416 01:25:51,452 --> 01:25:53,328 I'm not strong enough. 1417 01:25:56,915 --> 01:25:59,668 I think our manzai is strong enough. 1418 01:26:00,794 --> 01:26:02,337 But I'm not strong enough 1419 01:26:02,421 --> 01:26:04,173 to keep living like this. 1420 01:26:07,843 --> 01:26:10,929 Maybe I wasn't cut out to be a comedian. 1421 01:26:14,725 --> 01:26:16,477 What's wrong? 1422 01:26:20,272 --> 01:26:21,523 I... 1423 01:26:22,691 --> 01:26:24,401 I got married. 1424 01:26:26,528 --> 01:26:28,655 She's going to have a baby. 1425 01:26:35,829 --> 01:26:39,792 I won't say I'm doing this is for the baby. 1426 01:26:41,502 --> 01:26:43,003 But... 1427 01:26:43,837 --> 01:26:46,632 I think the kid helped me be brave enough 1428 01:26:46,715 --> 01:26:48,634 to make the decision. 1429 01:26:58,769 --> 01:27:01,480 You were the one who said, Let's do manzai." 1430 01:27:05,818 --> 01:27:07,194 I'm sorry. 1431 01:27:19,957 --> 01:27:21,375 Congratulations. 1432 01:27:24,586 --> 01:27:26,046 Congratulations. 1433 01:27:26,839 --> 01:27:28,632 So we should start looking for 1434 01:27:28,716 --> 01:27:30,551 a house that fits all four of us. 1435 01:27:30,634 --> 01:27:32,428 We don't need you to move in. 1436 01:27:32,511 --> 01:27:35,097 What would I tell her parents? 1437 01:28:14,887 --> 01:28:16,347 I'm going. 1438 01:28:41,372 --> 01:28:42,581 When we told our agency 1439 01:28:42,664 --> 01:28:45,000 we were going to dissolve the duo 1440 01:28:45,084 --> 01:28:47,294 they said we had to wait until the gigs 1441 01:28:47,378 --> 01:28:50,130 they'd already booked were over. 1442 01:28:51,131 --> 01:28:52,633 Not a single person 1443 01:28:52,716 --> 01:28:55,719 tried to stop us from breaking up. 1444 01:28:56,136 --> 01:28:58,389 - Who's up for karaoke? - Sounds good. 1445 01:29:01,600 --> 01:29:04,186 - Thank you. - See you. 1446 01:29:10,818 --> 01:29:14,571 I hadn't seen Mr Kamiya since that night. 1447 01:29:16,448 --> 01:29:20,160 Nobody talked about Ahondara anymore either. 1448 01:30:28,312 --> 01:30:30,898 We battled it out at the same theatres 1449 01:30:30,981 --> 01:30:32,649 at the same point of time in history. 1450 01:30:32,733 --> 01:30:36,653 I'm proud of every comedian that was there. 1451 01:30:38,405 --> 01:30:40,407 The same dirty Converses. 1452 01:30:41,408 --> 01:30:44,495 The same impoverished look. 1453 01:30:44,578 --> 01:30:46,622 There were so many of us. 1454 01:30:49,458 --> 01:30:51,251 For a moment 1455 01:30:51,794 --> 01:30:54,838 they helped me forget 1456 01:30:54,922 --> 01:30:56,965 that society had left me behind. 1457 01:31:00,761 --> 01:31:02,930 It felt like I'd spent an eternity 1458 01:31:03,013 --> 01:31:04,306 in hopelessness. 1459 01:31:04,390 --> 01:31:08,102 But I can say I tried my very best. 1460 01:31:09,436 --> 01:31:11,230 Even if 1461 01:31:11,313 --> 01:31:14,608 it all took place in a rotten Shangri-La. 1462 01:31:14,692 --> 01:31:19,530 Tickets for Sparks' last gig still available 1463 01:31:20,698 --> 01:31:22,032 I'd never even spoken a word 1464 01:31:22,116 --> 01:31:23,742 with most of them. 1465 01:31:23,951 --> 01:31:26,161 But without them 1466 01:31:26,245 --> 01:31:27,454 I couldn't have endured 1467 01:31:27,538 --> 01:31:30,416 such a crazy life for ten whole years. 1468 01:31:33,836 --> 01:31:36,130 The fear that gnaws at your guts 1469 01:31:36,213 --> 01:31:37,756 when nobody laughs at your jokes. 1470 01:31:38,882 --> 01:31:41,093 And the joy that lifts you right up 1471 01:31:41,176 --> 01:31:42,636 when they do. 1472 01:31:44,471 --> 01:31:47,141 You only get one chance at life. 1473 01:31:47,766 --> 01:31:49,685 Attempting something that may leave you 1474 01:31:49,768 --> 01:31:52,062 with nothing is a terrifying thing to do. 1475 01:31:54,481 --> 01:31:56,025 You can be a coward. 1476 01:31:56,316 --> 01:31:57,901 You can fool yourself. 1477 01:31:58,444 --> 01:32:00,904 You can even be hopelessly stupid. 1478 01:32:03,198 --> 01:32:04,533 As long as you try to defy convention 1479 01:32:04,616 --> 01:32:06,994 with all of your soul, 1480 01:32:09,038 --> 01:32:11,373 only then can you become a manzai artist. 1481 01:32:21,467 --> 01:32:23,761 Hello! 1482 01:32:23,844 --> 01:32:27,097 We are Sparks! Hope you enjoy the show! 1483 01:32:28,474 --> 01:32:31,101 I wanted to create manzai 1484 01:32:31,185 --> 01:32:33,228 that defied conventional wisdom. 1485 01:32:33,854 --> 01:32:36,315 That's why I became a comedian. 1486 01:32:37,232 --> 01:32:39,985 The only thing we defied was 1487 01:32:40,319 --> 01:32:42,321 the sweet old phrase that says 1488 01:32:42,404 --> 01:32:43,614 "Hard work pays off." 1489 01:32:43,697 --> 01:32:45,115 Why did you do that? 1490 01:32:45,199 --> 01:32:46,867 Don't defy something like that. 1491 01:32:47,034 --> 01:32:48,702 Sometimes you get so emotional 1492 01:32:48,786 --> 01:32:51,413 it's hard to say what you really mean. 1493 01:32:51,497 --> 01:32:53,332 That happens sometimes. 1494 01:32:53,457 --> 01:32:55,793 So, I want to try something. 1495 01:32:55,876 --> 01:32:56,919 To prove a point, 1496 01:32:57,002 --> 01:32:59,963 I'll say the opposite of what I mean. 1497 01:33:00,089 --> 01:33:02,633 You hear me. 1498 01:33:02,716 --> 01:33:04,635 I'm going to say the opposite of what I mean 1499 01:33:04,718 --> 01:33:06,261 with all the passion I have. 1500 01:33:06,345 --> 01:33:07,846 And I think that'll make 1501 01:33:07,930 --> 01:33:09,306 my true intentions clear. 1502 01:33:09,932 --> 01:33:12,976 You're talking crazy to the very end. 1503 01:33:13,602 --> 01:33:15,646 You'll see what I mean. 1504 01:33:15,813 --> 01:33:16,855 Even dummies can get it. 1505 01:33:16,939 --> 01:33:18,440 Don't call me a dummy. 1506 01:33:18,649 --> 01:33:19,983 Here goes. 1507 01:33:21,610 --> 01:33:23,529 Hey there, partner! 1508 01:33:24,488 --> 01:33:25,906 What? 1509 01:33:26,365 --> 01:33:28,450 You're really good at manzai. 1510 01:33:30,160 --> 01:33:32,162 That nearly sounded nice. 1511 01:33:32,246 --> 01:33:34,289 But you mean the opposite, right? 1512 01:33:34,373 --> 01:33:37,000 You never mess up your lines. 1513 01:33:38,335 --> 01:33:40,713 You have a pretty face and a great voice. 1514 01:33:41,255 --> 01:33:43,549 Your family is rich too. You're the best! 1515 01:33:43,632 --> 01:33:46,093 You're annoying! 1516 01:33:46,176 --> 01:33:47,720 You're a genius! 1517 01:33:47,803 --> 01:33:49,304 I'm going to slap you. 1518 01:33:49,388 --> 01:33:50,931 But even a genius like you 1519 01:33:51,015 --> 01:33:52,725 has some really annoying faults. 1520 01:33:52,808 --> 01:33:55,019 - Like what? - Firstly... 1521 01:33:56,061 --> 01:33:57,396 Your room is messy. 1522 01:33:57,479 --> 01:33:59,314 Is that the best you can do? 1523 01:33:59,523 --> 01:34:01,775 My place is tidy 1524 01:34:01,859 --> 01:34:03,193 but you can find better things to say. 1525 01:34:03,277 --> 01:34:05,988 - He eats like a bird, and a snail. - I do. 1526 01:34:06,071 --> 01:34:08,032 I eat like a horse and I'm quick too. 1527 01:34:08,115 --> 01:34:10,117 How stupid am I? 1528 01:34:10,200 --> 01:34:13,162 - His girlfriend's ugly. - That one's nice. 1529 01:34:13,245 --> 01:34:15,664 It was nice, but it wasn't about me. 1530 01:34:15,748 --> 01:34:19,251 His partner is extremely talented. 1531 01:34:21,837 --> 01:34:24,840 He has an extremely talented genius 1532 01:34:24,923 --> 01:34:27,801 for a partner, but for the last ten years 1533 01:34:27,885 --> 01:34:30,554 he did nothing but complain. 1534 01:34:30,637 --> 01:34:33,432 He was never there for me. 1535 01:34:36,894 --> 01:34:40,064 We spent so much time together 1536 01:34:40,147 --> 01:34:43,275 I feel like I've wasted my life. 1537 01:34:44,026 --> 01:34:46,945 It wasn't fun at all! 1538 01:34:49,239 --> 01:34:52,242 I'm the unluckiest guy in the world! 1539 01:34:58,916 --> 01:35:00,584 And you guys. 1540 01:35:01,627 --> 01:35:04,254 You are all so smart. 1541 01:35:04,338 --> 01:35:08,342 After all, we're so popular. 1542 01:35:08,425 --> 01:35:11,387 We have such a bright future. 1543 01:35:11,470 --> 01:35:13,847 But you never paid to see us. 1544 01:35:14,056 --> 01:35:17,017 You never came for a single show, darn you. 1545 01:35:18,769 --> 01:35:22,189 You really are so smart. 1546 01:35:23,732 --> 01:35:27,069 Thanks to you, my life was filled with pain. 1547 01:35:27,152 --> 01:35:28,654 You schmucks! 1548 01:35:30,823 --> 01:35:33,075 Want to tone it down? 1549 01:35:36,995 --> 01:35:38,831 Ever since I was a kid 1550 01:35:39,373 --> 01:35:43,293 I never dreamt of becoming a manzai artist. 1551 01:35:45,879 --> 01:35:47,005 Becoming a manzai artist 1552 01:35:47,089 --> 01:35:49,341 was your childhood dream, right? 1553 01:35:50,634 --> 01:35:52,761 No matter what it took 1554 01:35:52,845 --> 01:35:54,263 I definitely didn't want 1555 01:35:54,346 --> 01:35:55,806 to be a manzai artist. 1556 01:35:55,889 --> 01:35:57,725 I wasn't going to do manzai! 1557 01:35:57,808 --> 01:35:59,810 No darn way! 1558 01:36:00,644 --> 01:36:04,898 But then one day, back in junior high 1559 01:36:05,357 --> 01:36:07,317 I got to know my partner. 1560 01:36:07,401 --> 01:36:10,195 It's all his fault I'm a comedian. 1561 01:36:10,279 --> 01:36:12,573 It couldn't be worse. 1562 01:36:12,948 --> 01:36:15,617 All thanks to him, I died. 1563 01:36:15,909 --> 01:36:17,161 He killed me. 1564 01:36:17,244 --> 01:36:20,289 It's like he murdered me. 1565 01:36:20,664 --> 01:36:22,791 What's up, killer? 1566 01:36:25,544 --> 01:36:27,337 Every now and then 1567 01:36:28,338 --> 01:36:31,800 somebody says something nice about us. 1568 01:36:32,176 --> 01:36:34,136 Those guys... 1569 01:36:34,553 --> 01:36:36,930 They made me so happy! 1570 01:36:38,015 --> 01:36:39,058 It was like they were saying 1571 01:36:39,141 --> 01:36:40,976 my life meant something. 1572 01:36:41,060 --> 01:36:43,604 That's how happy they made me. 1573 01:36:45,397 --> 01:36:47,358 Unfortunately 1574 01:36:48,108 --> 01:36:50,819 there were people who weren't so kind. 1575 01:36:52,321 --> 01:36:53,739 They were... 1576 01:36:55,783 --> 01:36:57,534 you guys! 1577 01:36:58,535 --> 01:37:00,454 Are you listening, you schmucks? 1578 01:37:02,414 --> 01:37:05,542 You said Sparks were the worst! 1579 01:37:06,335 --> 01:37:09,380 You never wanted to see our faces again. 1580 01:37:10,047 --> 01:37:13,801 You said we had no reason to even exist. 1581 01:37:13,884 --> 01:37:15,302 You refused to acknowledge 1582 01:37:15,386 --> 01:37:17,596 our very existence. 1583 01:37:17,680 --> 01:37:19,932 You said "no" to us! 1584 01:37:20,641 --> 01:37:22,267 Darn you. 1585 01:37:22,851 --> 01:37:25,020 I hate you! 1586 01:37:25,521 --> 01:37:28,148 Why are you even listening, morons! 1587 01:37:34,113 --> 01:37:36,490 We are Sparks. 1588 01:37:37,825 --> 01:37:41,328 This is not our last manzai act. 1589 01:37:43,622 --> 01:37:46,542 We'll be on stage again. 1590 01:37:46,625 --> 01:37:49,461 We'll see you again. 1591 01:37:50,129 --> 01:37:52,464 That makes me so very happy. 1592 01:37:55,217 --> 01:37:56,760 I gave ten years of my life. 1593 01:37:56,844 --> 01:37:59,805 Will it help me live the rest? 1594 01:37:59,888 --> 01:38:01,557 No! 1595 01:38:02,641 --> 01:38:05,144 I have one wish for you all. 1596 01:38:05,644 --> 01:38:07,604 Just go and die! 1597 01:38:08,689 --> 01:38:10,149 Die! 1598 01:38:10,566 --> 01:38:11,692 Die! 1599 01:38:11,775 --> 01:38:12,901 Die... 1600 01:38:12,985 --> 01:38:14,319 Die... 1601 01:38:14,403 --> 01:38:16,864 Die.. 1602 01:38:16,947 --> 01:38:18,365 Die! 1603 01:38:18,449 --> 01:38:19,825 All of you. Die! 1604 01:38:19,908 --> 01:38:21,452 Die! 1605 01:38:23,328 --> 01:38:24,580 Die! 1606 01:38:24,663 --> 01:38:26,123 Die! 1607 01:38:28,792 --> 01:38:31,503 Leave your family and die! 1608 01:38:34,965 --> 01:38:36,800 Shut up. 1609 01:38:38,552 --> 01:38:40,387 What are you laughing at? 1610 01:38:44,308 --> 01:38:46,143 You're laughing too. 1611 01:38:53,734 --> 01:38:55,361 Know what? 1612 01:38:58,030 --> 01:39:00,491 You've been pretty rude today. 1613 01:39:06,789 --> 01:39:09,124 Why did you make the audience cry? 1614 01:39:12,711 --> 01:39:14,588 When you do manzai 1615 01:39:19,051 --> 01:39:21,261 you're supposed to make them laugh. 1616 01:39:23,013 --> 01:39:24,723 Look what you did. 1617 01:39:25,474 --> 01:39:27,351 You call this manzai? 1618 01:39:30,437 --> 01:39:32,398 Then I guess... 1619 01:39:32,856 --> 01:39:34,441 with our very last try... 1620 01:39:35,484 --> 01:39:37,111 I finally created manzai 1621 01:39:37,194 --> 01:39:39,113 that defied conventional wisdom. 1622 01:39:39,571 --> 01:39:41,115 Shut up. 1623 01:39:44,827 --> 01:39:47,955 This is it. Don't you have anything to say? 1624 01:39:54,920 --> 01:39:56,380 My partner... 1625 01:39:56,588 --> 01:39:57,923 What? 1626 01:40:03,470 --> 01:40:05,514 Dear audience... 1627 01:40:06,682 --> 01:40:08,767 I want you to know I feel zero gratitude. 1628 01:40:18,402 --> 01:40:19,903 How could you say that? 1629 01:40:19,987 --> 01:40:22,531 I was talking in opposites too. 1630 01:40:23,032 --> 01:40:24,825 You know what I meant. 1631 01:40:28,454 --> 01:40:30,956 You really are good at manzai. 1632 01:40:31,040 --> 01:40:32,875 I've had enough. 1633 01:40:33,375 --> 01:40:35,335 - Thank you. - Thank you. 1634 01:40:58,233 --> 01:41:00,903 I want to do more manzai. 1635 01:41:01,945 --> 01:41:04,531 I never want to stop doing manzai. 1636 01:41:05,866 --> 01:41:09,411 He has a really strong voice. 1637 01:41:12,664 --> 01:41:15,000 He put his faith in me 1638 01:41:15,084 --> 01:41:17,294 and he stuck by me the whole time. 1639 01:41:19,380 --> 01:41:22,049 He must've been so frustrated. 1640 01:41:22,383 --> 01:41:26,387 It must have been really tough on him. 1641 01:41:28,305 --> 01:41:31,100 I really am sorry. 1642 01:41:50,369 --> 01:41:53,997 Every House Realty Inc. 1643 01:41:56,917 --> 01:41:59,586 Sorry to keep you waiting. 1644 01:42:02,923 --> 01:42:05,551 What do you think of this apartment? 1645 01:42:06,010 --> 01:42:07,678 It's so clean! 1646 01:42:07,761 --> 01:42:10,180 Do you have any Japanese-style rooms? 1647 01:42:10,264 --> 01:42:11,724 Japanese-style? 1648 01:42:14,768 --> 01:42:16,770 Let me see. 1649 01:42:16,937 --> 01:42:18,731 I'm glad you liked it. 1650 01:42:18,814 --> 01:42:20,649 The station's that way. So, good luck. 1651 01:42:20,733 --> 01:42:21,942 - Thank you. - Thank you. 1652 01:42:22,026 --> 01:42:23,068 Thank you. 1653 01:42:23,152 --> 01:42:24,903 We're going to live in Tokyo! 1654 01:42:55,601 --> 01:42:59,688 Success Is In Your Hands 1655 01:43:39,728 --> 01:43:41,563 Mummy! 1656 01:43:42,940 --> 01:43:45,275 How lovely. Is it for me? 1657 01:43:45,359 --> 01:43:46,694 Thank you. 1658 01:43:46,777 --> 01:43:48,487 Shall we blow it together? 1659 01:43:49,154 --> 01:43:50,197 More! 1660 01:43:52,241 --> 01:43:54,326 One more try. 1661 01:43:54,410 --> 01:43:55,703 Ready? 1662 01:43:56,912 --> 01:43:59,039 It's stuck on you. Turn your head. 1663 01:43:59,998 --> 01:44:01,834 I got it. 1664 01:44:06,588 --> 01:44:08,090 Let's go. 1665 01:44:09,633 --> 01:44:11,135 Want to see the lake? 1666 01:44:11,218 --> 01:44:12,261 The fish? 1667 01:44:48,005 --> 01:44:49,131 Kamiya: Tokunaga, have you had dinner? 1668 01:44:49,214 --> 01:44:50,716 Hot pot? You've got strong teeth, right? 1669 01:45:03,896 --> 01:45:05,522 Hello. 1670 01:45:12,196 --> 01:45:13,947 Mr Kamiya. 1671 01:45:15,032 --> 01:45:17,284 What have you been doing all this time? 1672 01:45:18,035 --> 01:45:19,661 My partner punched me in the face 1673 01:45:19,745 --> 01:45:21,705 as hard as he could. 1674 01:45:23,040 --> 01:45:24,666 What happened? 1675 01:45:24,875 --> 01:45:27,753 Let me tell you what happened. It was so bad. 1676 01:45:27,836 --> 01:45:29,880 - OK. - I went to the agency 1677 01:45:29,963 --> 01:45:33,467 to apologise today, but they won't have me. 1678 01:45:33,550 --> 01:45:35,427 Of course not. 1679 01:45:35,511 --> 01:45:37,596 My debt got so big. 1680 01:45:37,680 --> 01:45:40,140 I couldn't do anything. I went back to Osaka 1681 01:45:40,224 --> 01:45:42,434 and made money like crazy. 1682 01:45:43,686 --> 01:45:44,770 Did you pay it all back? 1683 01:45:44,853 --> 01:45:46,730 No, I filed for bankruptcy. 1684 01:45:46,814 --> 01:45:48,941 But I paid some to the scary guys. 1685 01:45:49,024 --> 01:45:51,527 Whatever you do, never get in debt. 1686 01:45:51,860 --> 01:45:55,155 Those debt collectors are so scary. 1687 01:45:59,076 --> 01:46:00,703 What are they? 1688 01:46:01,912 --> 01:46:03,831 They're size DD. 1689 01:46:05,958 --> 01:46:08,210 I thought the bigger, the funnier. 1690 01:46:08,293 --> 01:46:10,003 I put heaps of silicone in them. 1691 01:46:11,213 --> 01:46:12,673 I was always against people 1692 01:46:12,756 --> 01:46:14,591 who made characters for themselves 1693 01:46:14,675 --> 01:46:16,427 but I think I was wrong. 1694 01:46:16,510 --> 01:46:17,553 If your character is stronger 1695 01:46:17,636 --> 01:46:18,679 than your material 1696 01:46:18,762 --> 01:46:21,181 you're just not funny enough. 1697 01:46:23,892 --> 01:46:25,477 That won't work. 1698 01:46:26,979 --> 01:46:29,189 Everyone's eyes will be glued there. 1699 01:46:33,277 --> 01:46:34,653 Who's going to laugh? 1700 01:46:35,404 --> 01:46:37,948 Come on. It's funny. 1701 01:46:51,670 --> 01:46:54,465 It's not funny at all. 1702 01:46:56,842 --> 01:46:58,886 I thought these would get me on TV. 1703 01:46:58,969 --> 01:47:00,304 No way possible. 1704 01:47:02,139 --> 01:47:05,184 A man in his thirties with huge knockers? 1705 01:47:05,267 --> 01:47:07,269 Who would laugh at that? 1706 01:47:10,439 --> 01:47:12,066 Think about it. 1707 01:47:12,524 --> 01:47:17,363 You think a man with knockers is funny. 1708 01:47:17,446 --> 01:47:19,907 That's all you're thinking, right? 1709 01:47:20,824 --> 01:47:22,826 But in the outside world 1710 01:47:22,910 --> 01:47:24,578 sexuality is an issue for some. 1711 01:47:25,537 --> 01:47:28,707 Gender issue is a very real thing. 1712 01:47:29,375 --> 01:47:30,709 There are people who have 1713 01:47:30,793 --> 01:47:32,920 a real hard time because of such issues. 1714 01:47:35,005 --> 01:47:37,091 Think about it. 1715 01:47:38,342 --> 01:47:40,928 If they saw you like this 1716 01:47:41,762 --> 01:47:43,555 what would they think? 1717 01:47:45,474 --> 01:47:46,934 They would be offended. 1718 01:47:47,059 --> 01:47:48,811 Right? 1719 01:47:55,859 --> 01:47:59,279 If everyone were just like you 1720 01:47:59,571 --> 01:48:01,407 then it might not be a problem. 1721 01:48:01,490 --> 01:48:06,078 Or if you did this from the heart... 1722 01:48:06,286 --> 01:48:08,831 If you truly wanted to become a female 1723 01:48:09,540 --> 01:48:12,084 there would be no problem. 1724 01:48:13,335 --> 01:48:15,671 But that's not why you did this. 1725 01:48:17,798 --> 01:48:20,300 There are bigots out there 1726 01:48:20,384 --> 01:48:22,511 who judge and harass these folks. 1727 01:48:22,594 --> 01:48:25,389 We're all aware of such discrimination. 1728 01:48:27,099 --> 01:48:29,852 If people who don't know you see this 1729 01:48:30,477 --> 01:48:33,147 they'll think you're one of those bigots. 1730 01:48:37,609 --> 01:48:39,695 I know you don't mean any harm. 1731 01:48:39,778 --> 01:48:41,447 I know that but... 1732 01:48:46,285 --> 01:48:51,373 we can't ignore what everyone else thinks. 1733 01:48:52,916 --> 01:48:55,586 Tokunaga, that's enough. 1734 01:48:58,088 --> 01:48:59,548 I was wrong. 1735 01:49:02,051 --> 01:49:04,011 I really was a total idiot. 1736 01:49:27,159 --> 01:49:28,660 Fireworks. 1737 01:49:32,998 --> 01:49:36,043 Do you want to see some fireworks? 1738 01:49:37,961 --> 01:49:39,838 Mr Kamiya, let's go to the fireworks. 1739 01:49:43,217 --> 01:49:44,843 At this time of year? Where? 1740 01:49:44,927 --> 01:49:46,595 They're on. 1741 01:49:47,638 --> 01:49:49,056 Let's go. 1742 01:49:54,436 --> 01:49:55,854 This reminds me of my school trip 1743 01:49:55,938 --> 01:49:57,439 back in junior high. 1744 01:49:57,523 --> 01:49:59,149 There's the ocean! 1745 01:49:59,441 --> 01:50:01,610 - This is nice. - It is. 1746 01:50:01,694 --> 01:50:03,487 We're here. 1747 01:50:04,697 --> 01:50:07,533 We're nearly at Atami. 1748 01:50:11,453 --> 01:50:13,330 - Tokunaga... - Yes? 1749 01:50:13,414 --> 01:50:15,165 Sorry I can't join you in the bath house. 1750 01:50:15,249 --> 01:50:16,834 Who cares? 1751 01:50:17,000 --> 01:50:18,669 But really, which one should I go? 1752 01:50:18,752 --> 01:50:21,171 I don't know. 1753 01:50:27,302 --> 01:50:28,804 For real? 1754 01:50:36,937 --> 01:50:39,189 - Tokunaga, look at that! - I'm looking. 1755 01:51:00,419 --> 01:51:03,422 Ramen & Soba 1756 01:51:14,725 --> 01:51:16,685 We sat here, right? 1757 01:51:17,436 --> 01:51:18,854 Was it? 1758 01:51:19,688 --> 01:51:21,690 You haven't changed a bit. 1759 01:51:21,774 --> 01:51:23,400 We were here ten years ago. 1760 01:51:23,484 --> 01:51:25,110 Do you remember? 1761 01:51:25,194 --> 01:51:27,571 - See you next time. - Thank you! 1762 01:51:27,654 --> 01:51:29,698 I'm not sure. Sorry. 1763 01:51:29,782 --> 01:51:31,200 Mum. 1764 01:51:31,283 --> 01:51:33,744 - I don't get this one. - OK. 1765 01:51:35,496 --> 01:51:38,499 Let me see. Over at that table. 1766 01:51:56,809 --> 01:51:58,310 Atami Comedy Contest Registration Now Open 1767 01:51:58,394 --> 01:52:00,646 It's on tomorrow. 1768 01:52:01,772 --> 01:52:03,607 Oh, it is. 1769 01:52:05,067 --> 01:52:06,902 Let's enter it together. 1770 01:52:06,985 --> 01:52:09,363 I bet the deadline for registration is over. 1771 01:52:09,738 --> 01:52:11,615 They'll let us in. 1772 01:52:11,699 --> 01:52:13,325 No, they won't. 1773 01:52:14,243 --> 01:52:17,204 Ma'am, sorry to disturb you. 1774 01:52:17,287 --> 01:52:19,665 Can we still enter this contest? 1775 01:52:19,915 --> 01:52:21,667 Sure, they welcome last-minute contestants. 1776 01:52:21,750 --> 01:52:23,377 Sounds like a real popular competition. 1777 01:52:23,460 --> 01:52:24,837 Let's do it. 1778 01:52:24,920 --> 01:52:26,964 - No, I won't. - Come on. Let's do it. 1779 01:52:27,047 --> 01:52:28,549 No. 1780 01:52:29,049 --> 01:52:32,011 Are you refusing your mentor's request? 1781 01:52:33,095 --> 01:52:35,514 I retired from comedy. 1782 01:52:40,352 --> 01:52:41,603 Tokunaga. 1783 01:52:41,854 --> 01:52:43,105 Yes? 1784 01:52:43,814 --> 01:52:45,899 I don't think there's such a thing 1785 01:52:45,983 --> 01:52:48,235 as retirement for comedians. 1786 01:52:49,194 --> 01:52:50,946 You thought of funny things 1787 01:52:51,030 --> 01:52:52,823 for ten years straight. 1788 01:52:52,906 --> 01:52:55,576 You made people laugh at the theatres. 1789 01:52:55,659 --> 01:52:57,870 They didn't always laugh. 1790 01:52:57,953 --> 01:52:59,329 Sometimes. 1791 01:52:59,413 --> 01:53:01,999 But you made them laugh all that time. 1792 01:53:02,082 --> 01:53:04,084 That means you've equipped yourself 1793 01:53:04,168 --> 01:53:06,086 with an incredibly specialised skill. 1794 01:53:06,170 --> 01:53:07,796 It's like a boxer's punch. 1795 01:53:07,880 --> 01:53:10,632 Even a no-name can kill with one strike. 1796 01:53:10,716 --> 01:53:12,843 It's the same with comedians. 1797 01:53:13,135 --> 01:53:14,970 The only difference is 1798 01:53:15,054 --> 01:53:16,430 the more comedians punch 1799 01:53:16,513 --> 01:53:18,390 the happier we make people. 1800 01:53:19,558 --> 01:53:21,310 So, even if you quit comedy 1801 01:53:21,393 --> 01:53:23,937 and make your living doing some other job, 1802 01:53:24,021 --> 01:53:26,565 you can still thump them with laughter. 1803 01:53:26,732 --> 01:53:29,985 Nobody else out there has a punch like yours. 1804 01:53:37,242 --> 01:53:38,952 The thing about manzai is 1805 01:53:39,203 --> 01:53:41,413 you can't do it by yourself. 1806 01:53:42,373 --> 01:53:44,958 You need at least one partner. 1807 01:53:53,926 --> 01:53:56,178 But to be honest, I think two people 1808 01:53:56,261 --> 01:53:58,305 aren't enough to make manzai. 1809 01:53:59,390 --> 01:54:01,892 If we were the only manzai artists around 1810 01:54:01,975 --> 01:54:05,312 I don't think I'd have tried so hard. 1811 01:54:05,896 --> 01:54:07,064 We were surrounded by 1812 01:54:07,147 --> 01:54:08,649 so many amazing comedians. 1813 01:54:08,732 --> 01:54:10,526 We had to make something new 1814 01:54:10,609 --> 01:54:12,194 or take it to the next level. 1815 01:54:12,277 --> 01:54:14,321 - They made us think. - Indeed. 1816 01:54:14,405 --> 01:54:17,282 It's like we were all making it together. 1817 01:54:19,201 --> 01:54:20,577 Maybe only a handful of each generation 1818 01:54:20,661 --> 01:54:22,663 hit the big time. 1819 01:54:23,247 --> 01:54:25,708 But it's their peers that force them 1820 01:54:25,791 --> 01:54:27,793 to create something original. 1821 01:54:27,876 --> 01:54:30,129 Otherwise, they'd get filtered out. 1822 01:54:31,672 --> 01:54:33,298 And this natural selection makes it clear 1823 01:54:33,382 --> 01:54:35,008 who won and who lost. 1824 01:54:35,092 --> 01:54:36,969 That's what makes it so good. 1825 01:54:37,594 --> 01:54:40,139 But when a guy gets filtered out, 1826 01:54:40,222 --> 01:54:43,851 it doesn't mean he did it for nothing. 1827 01:54:44,601 --> 01:54:45,644 They definitely meant something. 1828 01:54:45,728 --> 01:54:48,272 Maybe some of them regret having tried. 1829 01:54:48,772 --> 01:54:51,692 But does that mean it was pointless 1830 01:54:51,775 --> 01:54:53,027 for everyone, other than the duo that won? 1831 01:54:53,110 --> 01:54:55,362 Of course not. If there was only one duo, 1832 01:54:55,446 --> 01:54:57,906 they definitely wouldn't be that funny. 1833 01:54:59,033 --> 01:55:02,453 Even if some guy only went on stage once 1834 01:55:02,536 --> 01:55:04,496 his act still meant something. 1835 01:55:07,332 --> 01:55:10,335 No doubt about it. 1836 01:55:11,754 --> 01:55:14,131 Everyone was needed. 1837 01:55:16,925 --> 01:55:19,178 That means we're all part of the manzai 1838 01:55:19,261 --> 01:55:21,597 that's to come. 1839 01:55:24,183 --> 01:55:26,810 So, no matter what you do 1840 01:55:27,186 --> 01:55:29,813 comedians can never retire. 1841 01:55:38,197 --> 01:55:39,823 Thank you. 1842 01:55:40,115 --> 01:55:41,909 So, let's do manzai. 1843 01:55:42,409 --> 01:55:43,744 Are you serious? 1844 01:55:43,827 --> 01:55:45,079 Let's come up with an act. 1845 01:55:47,998 --> 01:55:49,833 We came all the way down here. 1846 01:55:49,917 --> 01:55:52,461 Let's hop in the bath and take it easy. 1847 01:55:52,878 --> 01:55:55,631 You're not taking no for an answer. 1848 01:55:55,714 --> 01:55:58,300 Can't we just relax? 1849 01:56:03,430 --> 01:56:05,099 I'm sorry. 1850 01:56:07,851 --> 01:56:09,812 - Tokunaga. - Yes? 1851 01:56:09,895 --> 01:56:12,189 I have an incredible idea. 1852 01:56:13,941 --> 01:56:16,777 We'll have a homeless guy next to us 1853 01:56:16,860 --> 01:56:19,196 while we do our manzai. 1854 01:56:19,446 --> 01:56:21,532 We don't take any notice of him. 1855 01:56:21,615 --> 01:56:22,866 We're just doing our manzai. 1856 01:56:22,950 --> 01:56:25,119 But all of sudden, he starts to read out 1857 01:56:25,202 --> 01:56:27,871 a really touching poem to his family. 1858 01:56:27,955 --> 01:56:28,997 What the hell? 1859 01:56:29,081 --> 01:56:31,250 We are alive. 1860 01:56:31,417 --> 01:56:34,503 As long as we're alive, it's not the end yet. 1861 01:56:35,295 --> 01:56:37,673 We're still only halfway there. 1862 01:56:37,756 --> 01:56:39,633 We must continue from here on. 1863 01:56:39,717 --> 01:56:40,759 Let's do manzai. 1864 01:56:40,843 --> 01:56:42,803 I told you. No. 118059

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