All language subtitles for Nar nettene blir lange CD1

Stay here!

Hello, my boy.
Nice tan!

-Those are the presents.
-In plastic bags?

New car again?

-You were late.
-Thanks to the pre-Christmas chaos.

-I'm glad we're leaving.
-I wish we could stay home.

-I can't hear you through the door.
-Close it! I'm freezing.

-I hope we'll have a nice time.
-Me too. Here we go.

Hi, Siri.
You can stay put, mom.

-Hi, Morten!
-There's grandma.

It's cold in here.
Close that door!

-Per Arne speaking.
-Morten can catch a cold.

-Quit smoking and give us a hand.
-Stop nagging!

I need to be able
to see out the back.

We're all stressed out.

-We can't bring the kick sled.
-You talk to her!

-I thought we could use it.
-Stick it on the roof.

I'll call you when we get up there.

You're route today
has been from there to here!

Where are the keys? We can't leave
without locking the door.

Don't get all stressed out, Siri.

You'll get cystitis
in that ridiculous outfit, Siri.

Put on Morten's seatbelt.

-Turn off that music, mom.
-I think it's nice.

Is the stereo
supposed to be on, Siri?

This is Fredrik's, and only
Fredrik's, answering machine.

Leave a message for me
after the tone.

Bastard!

Here it is.

Wait here with the kids.

Hold the flags up.

Hello!

Hi, mamma!

Go and greet them.

My, how you have grown!

My pleasure!
Beautiful!

Is it always this cold here?

-How is your mother?
-Fine. She's with grandma in Poland.

-Here is my car.
-Congratulations, my boy!

It's only a rental, dad.

Finally!

There they are!

Hi there, sweetie.
This is going to be great.

It is so good to see you, dad.

Great to see you.
You just cry, sister.

Such a beautiful woman.
Don't cry!

-He speaks German?
-Learned it from Hitler.

I also speak a little German.

Martin, put on a coat
so you don't get sick!

Why is that dog here? We agreed
Lucaz' asthma was more important.

Welcome.

You unlock it.
My fingers keep freezing.

Thank you.
Norway is a beautiful country!

-But very cold, right?
-Very cold, but very beautiful.

-Screw it!
-Let's unpack the car.

Mother of God!

Don't worry.
We have plenty of space.

Soon they will offer us a drink.
This is a hospitable country.

-Where should I hang my coat?
-Throw it on the bed.

Astrid!

And Morten!
My, how you have grown.

Kari, pull yourself together.
It doesn't help to cry.

Eivind, get rid of that dog!
Haven't you trained him at all?

You're the one spoiling him, dad.

Come meet my mother.

No water or toilet,
nowhere to hang my clothes...

Don't worry, mamma.
I want you to meet Liv's mother.

Mother-in-law Astrid, mamma Irena.

Come eat, before it's too late!

Jumble broth.

It is based on pork grease.

It is a Christmas tradition
for Norwegian men.

-You rinse it down with aquavit.
-Thank God!

Finally we are gathered together.

Irena and Olek, who have come from
Poland to spend Christmas with us.

In our small, independent country.
I'm proud we rejected the EU.

When are we going to eat, dad?

Here's to Irena and Olek.

Welcome to our family.

I am grateful to have you
as my son-in-law, Stanislaw.

Cheers and Merry Christmas!

-What are you whispering about?
-Nothing, mom.

Isn't that right, Liv?
You should have been a teacher.

And I should have been a doctor,
but had to take over dad's business.

Bedtime, boys.

Tomorrow Santa comes,
so you need to be rested.

-Can't Astrid stay with Gunnar?
-She wants to be near Morten.

Martin, how are you feeling?

-Not well.
-Take the inhaler.

Gunnar said
the dog had slept in here.

That dog better stay in his room.

Now what?

-Is that because of Lucaz' asthma?
-Unfortunately. Dust and dog hair.

-Don't worry about it. No problem!
-I'll keep the dog in our room.

-Who are you bunking with?
-Dad.

Good luck!

What's so funny about that?

-Good?
-Good!

And another,
and another, and another.

Here is an extra blanket.

-Are you warm now?
-Nice and warm. Good night.

May I come in, mom?

There is frost on the walls,
but at least your father is sleeping.

-The fireplace will help.
-Really?

-I said it's not serious.
-Not serious? Look at this, Gunnar.

Figure out what's wrong,
or Morten and I are leaving.

Call the owner.
Find out what's wrong.

We had trouble with our furnace.

The repairman said
it was about to explode.

And the insurance
could have paid for the renovation.

That's all you think about.
We could have died!

Hi, Jensen, this is Hansen.
Sorry to bother you at this hour.

Our kerosene burner
is burning a little black.

-I'll look at that.
-Tell him to come up here!

One moment, please.

-Tell him to come up here!
-You want to take over?

Hi, it's me again.

-Don't forget the propane.
-Just a second.

I haven't forgotten it!

We don't have any extra bottles
of propane, and if we run out ...

We have a Christmas dinner to make.

Yes, I see.
I understand.

I'll take care of that.
Sorry to bother you.

Merry Christmas.

-You sure were nice to him.
-I can't yell at the owner.

But nothing works here.
Would you rent out a cabin like this?

-What about all the smoke?
-We can get propane at the hotel.

The kerosene burner
has been defective for 15 years.

-Kerosene gathers on the ...
-On what? Be specific, Gunnar.

On the elements.
And it starts smoking.

Either way, it's no good
for our asthmatic friend.

Then open some windows!
I'll look at the burner.

I'll help you, dad.

-Maybe this is ...
-Stand back!

Look at all this kerosene ...
Get me a paper towel.

At least we can sleep safely now.
I'm going to bed.

Good night.

-Good night.
-Good night, dad.

It's good we're still in love.

Quiet! Don't open the door.
Go to bed.

Please, Moi.
Go to bed!

Good morning!

This coffee tastes good.

-Hi, Morten.
-How did you sleep?

Look what grandma has for you.
Isn't this nice?

There's no styrofoam
on the toilet seat!

-Have you seen a teapot, mom?
-I don't think so.

-You seem to be in good shape.
-I swim a couple of times a week.

-You look tired.
-Now I can finally relax.

-You take such care of your family.
-Shouldn't I?

Stanislaw is lucky,
the way you have taken to his kids.

That's called love, mom.

-Need any help?
-No thanks.

Good morning!

It's freezing out. I need
to get back under the covers.

The Christmas tablecloth
is for dinner tonight.

Here is hot water for you.

We weren't supposed to make
a big breakfast.

Soup for Christmas, that's ...

Per Arne, breakfast ...
Don't you feel well?

-That damn jumble stew!
-Merry Christmas, Per Arne.

-Let's go ice fishing.
-And sledding!

Kari, Liv and I
can take care of dinner here.

-I have things to do.
-Could you go out with Morten, mom?

For a little while.
Then I have to take care of dinner.

-Are you all right, dad?
-This is great!

Finally some fresh air! Now
we can get rid of that smoke smell.

No complaining.

-We need some music.
-There's no radio.

-What?
-There's no radio.

Did you bring that?

The summer of '72!

Time to clean up, girls.
Get those curtains down.

-Are we going to redecorate?
-Get those chairs and that table.

-Let's turn the table that way.
-Turn the table?

So we can look at the fireplace.

Too bad we couldn't
go to church today.

This isn't bad.

The fire is ready!

Hot dogs!

Oops!
Sorry about that, Morten!

-Don't forget about dinner.
-Don't ruin this for the boys.

I didn't mean it like that.

I think I'll have a hot dog.

-Liv, ask her when the soup is ready.
-Ask her yourself.

-She doesn't understand me.
-What's the rush?

We have to boil potatoes.

Is the soup ready soon?

She wants to know if it smells good.

-Have you locked the door?
-I'm getting changed!

Relax ...

I have to put the dog back.
Does it take that long to change?

Relax.

-Stress isn't good for your heart.
-I need to change too.

Hi, honey!

Could you get
some strong coffee into dad?

-Is he drunk?
-That's the tradition, isn't it?

You seem unaffected.

I'm not,
I've just lived with it a while.

But this Christmas
was supposed to be different.

It's impossible to talk to him
about these things.

Kari, can you help me in the kitchen?

It's time to get started.

-Time for Morten to get dressed.
-Can't we relax for a while?

It's Christmas Eve!
Why can't we relax?

Sit up.
Let me pour you some coffee.

Drink this, and you'll be fine.

-I love Christmas.
-I know. Drink.

-I feel so alone in the world.
-But you have us.

-I have no parents to turn to.
-This looks wonderful, Siri.

Don't lie down.

We've been through this before.

Siri, where is his outfit?

-Did you forget to pack it?
-I can't remember everything!

You can do it.
Here, take this.

Come back here!

There are some presents in that
basket that you can open now.

Come here.

Hold onto me, and we'll quietly
walk over to the bedroom.

Into the bedroom.
The bedroom!

You just take a little nap
before dinner.

You're nice, Liv.

I love you, dad.

Here's some more snow.

He's asleep now.

Do you want to go outside
and get some fresh air?

-Sure, after I get the fish.
-Are you leaving me alone here?

-Was there someone else?
-I don't think so.

What happened?

-Now I'm too old to have kids.
-My older girlfriend just had a boy.

You are so incurably positive, Liv.

You should shut up, when you don't
know what you're talking about.

You just have good advice
for everything, don't you?

Have kids yourself,
if it's so important to you!

Why are you crying? I'm the one
that's supposed to be crying.

Liv?
What's the matter?

I miscarried two weeks ago.

Now it's my turn to apologize, Liv.

-But you can try again.
-I love my husband.

You are a great couple.
His parents are so cute.

And he dragged them up
into this hell.

-Olek is wonderful.
-He's taken by you, too.

-Even though you cry all the time.
-Not all the time.

Hold the mirror for me.

Not easy to get dressed
in this rat's nest.

-What a lovely suit!
-You have seen it before, mom.

It looks so much smaller.

Impertinent as always, mom.

I'm just being honest.
You've never been this big before.

-Does Liv like that stomach?
-Yes, she does.

You look nice.

Thank you.
So do you.

What's the matter?

Mom didn't like my dress either.

Dinner's ready!

How beautiful everyone looks!

Sit wherever you sat yesterday.

Look at all those presents!

Wake up, Gunnar. It's Christmas Eve.
The children are waiting.

-How are you feeling?
-Merry Christmas.

Try to get up,
and we'll go eat dinner.

Everyone else is at the table.
Try to stand up.

Did you bump your head?

Splash some water on your face.

Let me get my pants on.

Here's some water.

Did that help?

I'm fine.

Nothing but soda water tonight, OK?

Ask Gunnar to sit next to you.

Gunnar, over here!

This is the body of Christ.

Take a piece, give it to your
neighbor, and wish each other well.

-On which side?
-Just make sure everyone gets one.

Break it in two, give it to someone,
and say something nice.

Who did you get that from?

Here you go, Gunnar.

Now you can make a wish.

You can begin pouring wine.

Here is some soda for dad.

-It smells delicious, mom.
-Here come the potatoes.

Eivind,
here's some more soda for dad.

Dear family ...

I liked that tradition
with the bread.

Nights like this
bring back so many memories.

Of those who are no longer with us.

The Christmases of our childhood.

Because Christmas
is for the children.

It is so great
to have you here with me.

And now we have the new
additions of Lucaz and Martin.

Since none of our children
seem to be ... fertile.

Except for you, Siri.

Cheers.

Let's hope our children will become
as productive as we were.

Cheers, and Merry Christmas.

Will you read
the Christmas Gospel, Kari?

Now?

"There went out a decree
from Caesar Augustus -

- that all the world
should be taxed."

"This taxing was first made when
Cyrenius was governor of Syria."

"All went to be taxed,
every one into his own city."

"Joseph went out of the city
of Nazareth, into Judaea, -

- unto the city of David,
which is called Bethlehem."

"To be taxed with Mary his wife,
being great with child."

"While they were there,
the days were accomplished -

- that she should be delivered.
She brought forth her firstborn ..."

Sorry.

Stop it!

Sorry.

-Was it because of my phone?
-Stop it, Kari!

Let's sing a song.

Enough!

We have visitors here, and you're
joking and ruining everything...

We want to have a nice Christmas,
but you keep giving him drinks!

You're trying to get him drunk.
These foreigners understand nothing!

The food was delicious.
Cheers, mom.

-Is everything my fault now?
-No, mom.

-Can't you talk to her, dad?
-She always loses it at Christmas.

She isn't the only one.

I found the almond!

Martin gets a present!

I'm going to move the car.

Cheers for Martin!

-Hi, Santa!
-Hello, everyone.

Have you children
behaved yourselves?

-Yes!
-That's good to hear.

How about you adults?
Have you behaved yourselves?

-Have you been a good boy?
-Yes, I have been so nice.

I have come all the way
from the North Pole.

"To Martin, from Liv and dad."

"To Morten, from Liv and family."

To Lucaz.

A rock?

"To Gunnar, from Olek and Irena."

Lets put it over there.

-I'll take that!
-What did you get?

To Stanislaw ...

To Astrid ...
Who is that? She isn't here today.

"To Kari, from Siri."

A bird box!

Not a bird box!

-It's time for Santa to leave.
-Thank you for coming, Santa.

Thank you, dad.

The other one was from the
whole family. This is just from me.

Let's dance
around the Christmas tree.

Let me organize it, dad.

Let's clear some space, and dance
around the Christmas tree.

Hi, mom.
Thank you for the beautiful present.

-Look what I got from Liv.
-Did she make that herself?

Here's something for you.
From her.

Look at that beautiful color!

-Worthy of a queen.
-How does it look?

Come out and join us.

How could he ruin
this Christmas too?

Don't let him run your life.
He's an alcoholic.

Don't use that word.
I can't enjoy myself out there.

-You just walked out.
-I had to.

-Now everyone is waiting for you.
-Let them wait.

Tell them I'm fine in here.
I might as well have gone to Spain.

No one would have missed me.
Just tell the kids grandma's fine.

Maybe you could clear the table
while you're relaxing?

She never thinks she does enough.
Treats them like kids.

-You're oversimplifying, dad.
-Don't snap at me, Siri.

Time for bed, Morten.

You can bring that into your room.

You can get the rest later.
Come on.

Good night.

No!
We're out of propane.

I'll take care of it.
We can boil tea water over the fire.