All language subtitles for New.Amsterdam.S03E07.ION

.

[gentle guitar melody]

♪

- Whoa.
- Mm-hmm.

- Whoa.
- Oh, hello.

- Oh, sorry, I had
the TV on pause earlier.

- Now it's not the only thing
you have on pause.

[laughter]

What's wrong?
- Where is that thing?

I need to turn this off.
There we go.

Hey, Martin.

[exhales sharply]

♪

- Hey.

I like seeing you.

♪

- Okay.
- Yeah.

- Yeah, Martin, I can't.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I can't.

- You don't have to apologize.

- I'm sorry, I just, you know.

I love you, I just--
these issues are--

- I know.
I said...

you don't have to apologize.

- [sighs]

- I get it.

Really.

It's late anyway.

[exhales deeply]

♪

- "We have seen
some dark days.

"A deadly pandemic,
its epicenter right here

"in New York City.

"Americans dying
by the thousands,

"forced to face their fates
scared and alone.

"Sometimes it feels like
the storm will never end.

"But believe this:

"it will end.

You will make it end."

Those words
were written in 1985

as this hospital faced,

not the crisis we're in now,

but a different one:

the AIDS epidemic.

So, here to honor
National HIV Testing Day,

please welcome
the man who wrote those words.

My personal hero,

the former Medical Director
of New Amsterdam,

Dr. George Helms.

[cheers and applause]

- Yes! All right!

- Whoo!

- Thank you, Dr. Goodwin.

[chuckling]

I'm so proud

to be here on a day
when we offer free care

to every HIV patient

that has come through
these doors.

Undocumented, uninsured,
under-insured.

It's top-to-toe coverage,
and it's on the house.

[pager beeping]
- Yes, amazing.

- Luna's banned from daycare.

- Banned?

C-can't you just give her
a detention or something?

- I'm sorry, Max, but
we take biting very seriously.

- Biting?
- Especially repeat offenders.

- She's teething.
She's not a felon.

Look, let me come up there,
and I will calm her down,

and then you can give her
a second chance.

- We've given her three.

- [quietly]
Three?

- Is any family around?

- My in-laws, but, uh,

you know what
our hours are like.

If she's not here,
I'm never gonna--

I'm never gonna see her.

Marsha, I don't have a plan B.

- Neither do I, Max.
I'm sorry.

I'll bring up Luna.

[quiet emotional music]

- [sighs]

[upbeat Indian music playing]

- Ig, Ig, look.

I told Casey I'd be out of
the E.D. for like, ten minutes.

- Yeah, no, any second now
he's gonna

walk through that door
and his sweet smile's

gonna light up that perfectly
round bald head of his, kay?

[door opens]

- Surprise!

- Shut the door, shut the--

- He's not here yet?
- Nope, nope.

Ig, look, I really got to go.

- Fudge. No, no, no.

Let me text Ella one more time.
Don't--don't eat those.

- Say hi for me.
- Um, you know what?

Actually I just wanted to
pop my head in real quick,

and I got to get back to work.
- Wait, wait, guys.

Have you forgotten that
he almost died?

Okay, he had COVID,
he had open heart surgery,

then he battled through
a hellish rehab.

Now today,
our friend is coming back here

and I want to celebrate him
for ten minutes

of your time, please.
[door opens]

- Surprise!
- Aah!

- Shoot!
- Sorry I'm late,

I was working on my toast.
- Agnes--

- What, he's not here yet?
- No.

- Yeah, you know what?
Give him my love.

- Just give him my love.
- C'mon, Floyd--

- Just tell him to come into
the E.D. and say hey.

Oh, Brunstetter,
you're back on too.

- Let me grab one more
of these pastry things,

and then I am right behind you.
- They're called laddu

and they're decorative,
Brunstetter.

God, what is wrong
with you people?

Ten minutes! Guys, ten min--
shut the door, at least.

Just--
[door closes]

Great, now it says "Kapoop."

- And then you start placing
one on each of the seats.

Oh, and please don't
forget the pens, okay?

Thank you.

- Uh, why are you all jittery?

- Because we're about to be hit

with an influx of HIV patients,

and with 6 feet
between each chair,

I'm not sure we have enough
hallway to accommodate them.

- No, you know what?
This feels more like

the kind of freak-out you have

when you're 24 hours away
from becoming a mum.

- Yes, Mina is coming tomorrow

but I'm not her mum,
I'm her aunt.

And a cool aunt doesn't
freak out, thank you.

- Uh,
she's a 16-year-old girl.

You're never gonna be
a cool anything.

- Oh, shush.
I just mean I'm gonna provide

a calm, accepting environment.

My role isn't to control her
life, it's to follow her lead.

And whatever may come,
this cool aunt

is just gonna roll with it.
- Ammeh Helen?

[quiet plucky music]

♪

- Mina. I'm--

- [chuckles]

- I thought that you were
coming tomorrow.

- I flew standby.
I thought I'd surprise you.

- Hi.

- Um, yes, yes, you did.
I just, um--

Oh! I just wish you'd called.
[chuckles]

- I don't believe it.
- Believe it.

Full refund from the venue
and from the caterer.

- Damn. What'd you have to do
to pull that off?

- I played the

"His mom has diabetes
and he broke" card.

- I'm not broke.
- [laughing]

Just say thank you, Floyd.
- Oh, I thank you.

So what's left on the
cancelled wedding checklist?

- Nothing.

All our business
is officially handled.

We're done.
- Good, all right.

- How's Mama Nola?
- Mama Nola's good.

Yeah, she's, uh, she's good.

- And what about Floyd?

Is he good?

- Uh...

[door opens]
- Incoming.

- Oh, uh, Evie,
we got incoming.

I got to go.
- Go do your thing.

- Kwame Adu. Passed out
at HIV testing upstairs.

Pulse 140 and thready.

- Kwame, I'm Dr. Bloom.

You're in New Amsterdam E.D.
We're gonna take

good care of you, okay?
- Okay.

- Okay, let's get him
on the bed.

- Take a look at these.
- Okay, nice and easy.

- Okay.
- Nice and easy.

- Hey, Kwame.
- Yes?

- We got the results from
the HIV test you just took.

- Uh-huh.
- It's positive.

- No.

No, that--that can't be true.

- Kwame, I'm sure it's not
the result that you wanted,

but HIV isn't a death sentence
anymore.

It's manageable.

- This can't be happening.
- Hey, hey, hey.

Look, just take it easy,
all right?

- That test is wrong.

- Okay, but the results
also say that

your pancreas is damaged.

That's why you're sick,
all right?

You just need to relax.
- That test is wrong!

- Okay--
- Okay? Okay?

- Just--Kwame, Kwame,
just have a seat right here.

Kwame!
- [gasping]

- If you don't get treatment,
you could die.

- Okay, let him go, okay?

You can't keep him here
against his will.

- His pancreas
is gonna explode.

- Then he's gonna be back.

Mariana, get Trauma room one

ready for an acute
pancreatitis.

- Yes.

- Uh, look out.

Oh, no, sorry about that.

Hey. Hey, hey, Luna.

Running from Dada is a bad,
bad move.

It's not very good, okay?
If you keep doing it,

you're gonna be on time out.
[crashing]

Hey, that's just the way
the world works.

Come here. There are rules.

And we got to follow
the rules, okay?

And when people do bad things,

they don't just get to--

to get away with it.

[punchy drum solo]

♪

.

- Dr. Val! Uh, any word on
the blood bank records?

- Yeah, here you go.

All we got on
Howie Cournemeyer.

Interesting stuff.

Cute kid.
- Yeah, she is.

Until she gnaws your face off.

Howie Cournemeyer
donated blood in 1986.

This is interesting why?
- Oh, it's much less the when

than the how much.

- A thousand pints in a month?
What, is he a whale?

His blood type keeps changing.
Sometimes in a single day.

- Oh, yeah, that whole thing's
total B.S.

- Not sure how it'll help you
catch a vandal though.

- Okay, check this out.
His blood type changes,

but his address stays the same
on almost every donation.

- Max with
the detective skills.

- Well, it's all about
keen skills of observation.

- Like I'm observing
your kid eating a plant?

- Hey, um...
- Hey.

What if I started
chewing on you?

- That's enough plant-based
eating for one day.

Okay, come here.
So we are daycare-less.

And, uh, recent development,
we don't have a plan B.

- Great story. Sign these.

- Um, you love kids.
- Very much the opposite.

- Right. Let me rephrase that.

You love being my assistant,
right?

- Yes, it's my childhood dream
come true.

- We would love to hang out
with you, Sandra.

'Cause you're so cool.
- No.

- Really? Please?
I'm begging you.

- Kay, try cash.
- Yeah, okay. I'll pay you.

Double? Triple. Quadruple.
Whatever it takes.

Please. Please take my baby.

You're the best.
- What?

- She's the sweetest thing
in the world.

Watch out,
she does bite sometimes.

Don't drop her. Food, water.
- I've--

[upbeat music]

Hello.

- So sorry.
I'm sure this isn't

how you imagined spending
your first day in America.

But I-I have a patient
who's in rough shape

so if you need me,
I'll be in the Oncology--

- [chuckles]
- What's--what's funny?

- I'm sorry.

It's just like watching

Dr. Helen on TV.
- Ah.

- My father would watch you
sometimes, and...

he'd say,
"Look, that's your Ammeh."

But it just felt so odd.

Like if he said my Amoo was

Ryan Seacrest or something.

- Uh, well. Look, if, um,

if it feels odd,

calling me "ammeh," then, um,

p-please don't.

- But that would be
disrespectful.

- No, no, no.
No, I'm asking you to.

Um, I should be more like your

big sister or your friend.

Your friend Helen.

That's what you should call me.

Just Helen.

- "Just Helen,"

I know it's rude to be
so direct,

but can I get some tea?

- Oh, yes.

Um, course.
You don't even have to ask.

The cafeteria's on
the fourth floor.

- Cool.
- Yeah.

It is cool.
[chuckles]

- Hi, yes, I am in
desperate need of a nanny,

and I heard you guys
are the best agency around.

No, thank you.

Well, I'm looking for
someone in the mid-town area.

Uh, let's see,
teaching experience is a must.

Bilingual is great.

Trilingual is better.

Uh, what else?
CPR certified, obviously.

And, uh, oh!
Like a wizard with vegetables.

I mean an actual wizard.

[buzzer sounds]

Great.

Oh, that's great.
Yeah, that's amazing.

Um, um, starting tomorrow,
if you have it.

[chuckles]

What--when you say
"ten-month waiting list,"

do you mean actual months
or is that a figure of speech?

- Yeah?

- I'm gonna have to
call you back.

Hi, are you Howie Cournemeyer?

- Yeah.
- I'm Max Goodwin,

medical director
at New Amsterdam.

- I knew you bastards
would come for me one day.

- I walk in this morning
with HIV,

and now I have cancer, too?
[chuckles dryly]

I mean this can't be happening.
I can't even pronounce it.

- Hemangiosarcoma.

And we don't know for certain
that's what you have.

- Okay, then
what do you think I do?

I mean, you just found a lump.
That could be anything, right?

- Hemangiosarcoma often occurs
when HIV goes undertreated.

We won't know anything
for sure until your MRI.

- HIV is not supposed to be
a big deal anymore.

I mean, I've been on
my cocktail for years

and I've been fine.
Now I miss a few check-ups

and I might die?
-Let's not jump to conclusions.

- [coughs]

Oh, my God, what's happening?

- Okay, can somebody
help please?

Get her to the E.D.!
[elevator bell dings]

- He's back. No pulse.

They found him
in a parking lot.

- V-TACH. Charging at 360.

- Shockable rhythm present.

[AED charging]

Clear.
- Clear.

- Shocking.
[click]

[monitor beeping]

- Screen for [murmurs].

- Airway is patent.
[beeping slows]

- He's back.

Normal sinus rhythm.
- Pulse ox, 97.

[door slams open]
- Kwame.

- Whoa, whoa. Hey, hey!
- Are you all right?

- No, out. You need to be out.
- I'm responsible for him.

- You don't have a mask!
- I'm the president of

his mission for
the Church of Jesus Christ.

- Elder Shumway.
- It's gonna be okay.

I'm here.

- I'll get the lidocaine
drip ready.

- Tell me what happened.

- I can't.

- You can tell me anything.

Remember?

- I was...

with a man.

I have HIV.

Please don't send me back.

I want to finish my mission.

The Church is all I have.
God is all I have.

- Then why did you
turn your back on Him?

Your mission is over.

- Elder Shumway, please.

Please! Please.

- [whispers]
Hey, it's okay, it's okay.

- Vijay! Oh, hey.

What's up? What's wrong?

- He's not coming.

- No, I don't know. He probably
just forgot his glasses

and he headed back
to get them--

- I just got an email.

The whole neurology
department did.

Dr. Kapoor just resigned.

He's not coming back.

Ever.

[upbeat folksy music
in background]

♪

.

- Okay, here's what
I think is happening.

I think
you're embarrassed because

you and I talk every day.

And now you're worried
that I'm gonna be mad

because you've been lying to me
literally the entire time.

But I'm not. I'm not mad.

I know that you have
one of those

ancient answering machines
that you can actually hear me

leaving a message for you
right now.

You can hear me talking.
So just pick up.

I'm not mad,
I swear I'm not mad.

[line beeps]

Okay, you know what?
I am mad.

I'm pissed.
I'm furious with you

because I'm your best friend.

You told the entire
neurology department

that you were resigning
before you told me.

Y-you still haven't told me

because you won't
pick up the phone!

Pick up the phone, Vijay!

[line beeps]

Do you want to know
where I was when

I heard your
little announcement?

I was at your surprise party.
Surprise!

I planned you a party
that you didn't show up to.

And you know, I don't--
I don't deserve this.

Vijay, I do not deserve this.

Unless I'm just your
deluded work friend

who's been putting himself
on for years.

In that case, by all means--
[line beeps]

Oh, n--

[groans]

- [loud slurping]

Oops. I forgot yours.

- Um, Mr. Cournemeyer.

Howie, listen--

- No, you listen.
I'm not scared of you.

I knew what I was doing
was against the law.

That was the point.

You're way too young
to remember any of this.

But back in the '80s,
at the height of AIDS?

The healthcare industry
failed its patients.

New Amsterdam
failed its patients.

Gay men
were treated like lepers.

Your nurses wouldn't even touch
friends of mine with AIDS.

Just left them alone
in the corners to die.

- Let me assure you--

- Big pharma?
Boy, do not get me started--

- I think that train's
left the station.

- Big pharma profiteered

off the gay community's
desperation to survive.

So I decided to fight
on behalf of those who had it.

I became an activist.
Then I joined ACT UP.

And we did what we had to do.

To make things right,
to make some noise.

And, so, yeah.

That's why I stole
the New Amsterdam seal.

And why I encased it
in a gigantic condom.

And no,
I will never give it back.

- Wow, that's, uh,

impressive, actually.

But not why I'm here.

- No.

Not for the...big condom.

- Uh, Mr. Cournemeyer,
I came here to ask you

how,

in March of '86,
you orchestrated a scheme

to donate a thousand pints
of blood under your name?

- What?
I would never have

donated a single drop
of my blood to your hospital,

even to make a point.

- But then why is your name--

- Come to think of it,
March of '86, I was in jail.

I demanded a coordinated
national policy to fight AIDS

by chaining myself
to the Statehouse doors.

They heard me.

- In jail.

- Wrong guy, Doc.

[alarms beeping]

- Esophageal?

- No negative interactions.

- I'm thinking
variceal bleeding,

likely from liver cancer.

[alarms beeping]

BP's dropping.
Have you got that tube in yet?

- I'm trying.
- STEMI ruled out at this time.

- Looks a bit more distal.

- About 2 centimeters
should do it.

Right...
[indistinct chatter]

there.
- Got it?

- I think so.

We should know
once the bleeding stops.

[alarm silences]
- It's good for now.

Fingers crossed that it holds.

- How did she let herself
get so bad?

- Because apparently
"HIV isn't scary anymore."

- Yeah, I guess some people
need to be scared.

- Have a seat.

I can't tell you about faith.

But I saw what your Elder did.

You shouldn't have to repent
to someone who abandoned you

at a time when
you needed him the most.

- Elder Shumway
loves me like a father.

He knew I was gay.

He treated me with grace
and acceptance.

All he asked of me was
to not act on my desires.

He did not turn his back.

I did.

I threw God away.

And this disease,

it means I will never
get God back.

Is there a pill?

A surgery?

Anything to scrape these

disgusting urges
out of my body?

- Kwame, Kwame.

Brother,
this is not disgusting.

This is who you are.

- [scoffs quietly]

Sex is not who I am.

I am my community.

My family, my faith.

I am an Elder

in the Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter-Day Saints.

That is who I am.

- That is not that simple.

- But it is that simple.

Think of the one thing

you can't live without.

That is who you are.

- Well, so I gave it
some thought,

and I realized I was being

way too stringent with
the nanny requirements,

so here's what
I'm looking for now.

Anyone. I will take anyone.
Do you--do you have anyone?

Dr. Val!
Ma'am, I will take

a well-trained Saint Bernard
at this point.

Okay, thank you very much.

So Howie couldn't really
shed any light.

He did have
a giant condom situation.

Not really sure what
that's about,

but I'll deal with that
tomorrow.

- Makes sense.
- Does it?

I need to track down the head

of the blood bank from 1986,
and problem is,

his information
on his W-2 is outdated,

so I was wondering if you
could ask the older staff.

Maybe they know him?

- Oh, yeah, sure thing.
What's the name?

- Uh, Dale Rustin.

- You sure?
- Yeah, why? You know him?

- No, but the whole blood
bank's been talking about him.

He's upstairs.
- He still works here?

- No, he's a patient.
He's dying.

- I'm sorry about
that last phone call.

Um, I didn't mean to
dump all that on you.

I love you,
and I hope that you are okay.

But I gotta draw
a boundary here, Vijay.

You need to pick up the phone,
right now,

or you and I can't ever be

the same kind of friends
anymore.

At all, really.

So pick up the phone.

Pick up the phone, Vijay.

[line beeps]

[call ends]

[sighs deeply]

.

- Stage III Astrocytoma.

I'm sorry to hear that.

"New Amsterdam.
Shame then, shame now."

You wouldn't know anything
about that, would you?

- I had worse things to say
about Medical Director Helms,

but kids do use that hallway.

- Dr. Helms is a pillar
of this hospital.

- [scoffs]

- So you don't want to
explain yourself?

You just want to
slander him anonymously?

- I'd slander him to his face

if I thought anybody
would care.

- Try me.

- In 1986,
this hospital needed blood.

As so many did.

But sexually active gay men

were banned from donating it
in this country,

even if they knew they were
HIV-negative.

- That's not Helms' fault.

It's...
[sighs]

it's the way
the world was then.

- Gay men can't donate

convalescent plasma
for COVID right now.

So you tell me,

what exactly changed?

[gasps/groans]

I'm fine.

I was a gay HIV-negative man.

My friends were dying.

They needed blood.

I couldn't donate.

I was the head of
the damn blood bank.

You know what that feels like?

A person has to do something.

Has to act.

- Like Howie Cournemeyer?

- [chuckles]

Howie was fearless.

I never met him,

but God, was he inspiring.

He made it so simple.

Just do something.

Act up.

And I did.

- You had gay men
hide their identities

and donate

using Howie's name.

- That's the best thing to do
in a plague.

Give.

Help.

I got to see scared men
going from

helpless to heroes,

drop by drop.

Until...

- Helms found out.

- He said he'd fire me.

My staff too.

Howie Cournemeyer
would have kept fighting,

but I needed my job.

So I shut the program down.

And that's something
I have to live with

for the rest of my life.

- You refilled this hospital's
blood bank

in under a month
during a pandemic.

You're a hero.

- Yet you honor the man
that made me a coward.

The world is burning,
Dr. Goodwin.

And you spend your day
hunting me down

for defacing a photograph?

Shame then, shame now.

- You came back.

- Reynolds?

What was that?

- What Kwame wants
more than anything

is to be a Mormon husband
to a Mormon wife,

and he thought he lost that.

- He has lost that.
He's gay.

- No, no.
He thought he lost that

because he's HIV-positive,

and he thought that meant
that he couldn't have children.

Which is the cornerstone
of his spiritual community.

- Gay people can have children.

- But between HART therapy
and PrEP, of course,

HIV can be untransmittable
and safe for conception.

So I called the Elder,
let him know that,

and he feels
there's a path for Kwame.

He even suggested
that he can marry a woman

who knows about his struggles.

- Are you kidding me?

You used the science of HIV

to put someone
back into the closet.

- Well, that's--
that's what he wants.

- So if he wanted to shoot
himself in the head,

where would you have
stood on that?

- What if he wanted to leave
the E.D.

with a failing pancreas?

You think I like this?
I don't.

But we can't pick and choose
when to respect

our patient's wishes.

And being a Mormon
is more important to Kwame

than his sexuality.

- Well, the guy he had
unprotected sex with

disagrees with you.
- Oh, come on.

Nobody's torturing him.
He's choosing this.

- Yes.

Yeah, he is choosing a life

based on the idea
that he has to

be somebody that he's not.

Because there's something wrong
with who he is.

Look, I get what you were
trying to do here, Floyd,

but we're talking about
his heart.

- Well, hello there.

So, I noticed that
you went out earlier.

- Yes. With Kevin.
He's my old friend.

- Your old friend?
- Yes.

You've been in New York
five hours,

and you've got an old friend?

- He's a friend
from the internet.

From when we were kids.

- I see. And he's, um,

how old?

- I'm not sure.
Can I go to your office now?

- Mina.
Did you get my texts?

- I was busy.

- Busy.

- Is there a problem?

I thought you said to
treat you like a friend.

- Yep, absolutely.

- And I didn't text
any of my friends

to tell them that I was
hanging out with Kevin.

- Yes, no, of course.
It's just, um,

you've never
been to New York before.

- Oh, it's a lot like Tehran,
just a little less crowded.

I'll see you when you're done?

- [sighs]

- Max, you wanted to see me.

- Hey, George.
I, uh...

I heard about
Howie Cournemeyer.

- Oh, I know how that looks.

If I let that continue
for one more day,

it would have been
an unmitigated disaster.

- It did circumvent a ugly,
very discriminatory regulation.

- No, no, it violated
federal policy.

I may have been a maverick,

but I wasn't about to
become a criminal.

The liability alone
would have crippled us.

- What did you do with
all that blood?

- Disposed of it.

- Even though all
donated blood is screened?

You threw it away, George.

You could have helped people.

And you chose not to.

- You know, the last time
I checked,

those were still
the FDA guidelines.

And as far as I can tell,

you aren't doing a damn thing
about them either.

[phone rings]

- Ella? Hi.
- Hey, hey, Dr. Frome.

- Hi, are you okay?

What about Vijay?
What's happening?

- No, hey, we're good.
We're all good.

Um, I just have to be quick

'cause he doesn't know
I'm calling you.

I heard your messages.

- Okay, well,
I'm glad somebody did.

- Yeah, uh, Iggy,
you have been so good to him.

To me.
- [exhales]

- You deserve to know
what's going on.

- You know, honestly, Ella,
I don't--

I don't really care
anymore, so--

- Vijay's doctor told him
he's never gonna work again.

Um, about a month ago.
He didn't want to believe it.

He kept saying that
the guy was crazy,

didn't know what
he was talking about.

But, um, a couple days after,
he got ready,

and decided to come into
the hospital early,

and surprise everybody.

Um, he couldn't make it out
the front door.

He won't talk to me about it.

He won't talk to anyone
right now.

So, um,

that's why I had to call.

You know, so you'd know.
- Yeah.

- Uh, a couple days ago,

he told me a story about you.

About a patient
who thought he was dead?

- Yeah. Yeah, I remember.

- And Vijay said how much
you helped the guy.

Helped his fiancée
to understand.

And Vijay said that

he might have saved
the guy's life but--

but you saved his soul.

That's what you do.

Dr. Frome, you just
go around saving souls.

- [sighs]

I learned from the best.

[sniffles]

.

- Great news.
It's just a hemangioma,

which is a collection
of blood vessels

that should
disappear on their own.

- Oh, my God. Thank God.

Okay.
- So, next step is to

adjust your antiretrovirals.

I'll need to see you
back here tomorrow.

- Oh, my God,
I'm so behind on work.

There's no way
I can come in tomorrow.

Your HIV care is important,
Karla.

- Yes, I know it's important,

but it didn't give me cancer,
right?

Didn't almost kill me.

So can I call you when
I come back up for air?

- Perfect. Next time I see you,
it'll be in the morgue.

You are walking out of here.

You're lucky,
'cause the kind of cancer

we thought you had is deadly,

and it's God's own luck
that you don't have it.

If what you take from this
is that you can continue

treating your HIV
like it's hay fever,

then I have no doubt
I'll be seeing you very soon,

whether you have room
in your schedule or not.

- Um, tomorrow's good.

- I can take him from here.

- Ah, this one.

- This one, unfortunately.
You mind?

- I don't retract
a word I wrote.

Shame then, shame now.

Yeah, well, I hope you don't,
because you were right.

Dale, I'd like you to meet
Howie Cournemeyer.

- Mr. Cournemeyer--
- Howie.

Excited to meet you.

- You know, the gay blood ban?

It's not just a regulation.

It's hate.

We should be ashamed
for allowing it.

So I'm initiating a new policy
regarding the gay blood ban.

I'm ignoring it.

And Howie is our first donor.

- You can't.
They'll strip your funding.

- [whispers]
Yeah.

Well, then we'll just take
them to court.

And when we win,

they will throw that
bigoted law in the trash,

thanks to you.

- I've been screaming about
this nonsense for 30 years,

and nothing happened.

Look what you did.

- [sobs]

- Hey, I'm finishing my chart
on Karla.

Any surprises at discharge?

- Uh, no. She just needed
a little bit of tough love.

- Scared her to death, huh?
- [chuckles]

- Love it when
you get all Mama Bear.

- A quality
that's deserted me now that

there's a Baby Bear
in my office.

Um, honestly,

Mina walked all over me today,

and I'm just letting her do it.

I--I don't know what to say.

- Just talk to her
like she's a patient.

- But she's not.

I mean her father's just died,
she's in a new country.

If someone should be
playing bad cop with her,

it really shouldn't be me.
I barely know her.

I'm not her aunt at all.
Really, I'm just--

[chuckles]
some woman.

- My sister and I,
we're both addicts

who only trust chaos and

are incapable of having
intimate relationships.

That's what happens when no one
gives you boundaries.

You're all Mina has now.

You've got to be her mother,
her aunt, her friend.

Her everything.

And if you can't do that
then, yeah, you're right.

You're just some woman
who doesn't deserve her.

- Those are wise words
coming from someone that

let a stranger
live in our storage closet.

- Well, you can't win 'em all.

- [chuckles]
- Good luck.

- [sighs]

[clears throat]

- Hi!
- Here's Baby Dahmer.

- That bad?

- When she wasn't
gnawing on me,

I checked out
some parenting blogs.

Um, apparently
biting's pretty normal,

so I wouldn't, like,
beat yourself up.

- Yeah, I guess it's their way
of, I don't know, acting out.

I--she's trying to tell me
she's missing something.

- Yeah, her data plan,
by the looks of it.

- Her grandma.

- Oh, problem solved.

Can't she just spend more time
with her?

- Uh...

Gwen would love nothing more.

- And that's bad because...?

- Just means I can't
do this on my own.

- Max.

I don't think
you're supposed to.

- Days like this make me think
of His mysterious ways.

[indistinct conversation]

[click]

[video call rings]

- Hey.

- Floyd.

Did the Venmo not go through?

- No, no, everything's
all good.

Uh, I was just thinking.

Well, not thinking.

I, uh...

I know that--

- Know what?

- That I made a mistake.

- Floyd, I--

- You know that
old school joint,

"If loving you is wrong--"
- Floyd.

- I know you feel me.

- I do.

[chuckles]

I do.

But I also know that
I'm nobody's wrong.

And if I were your right,

we wouldn't be having this
talk thousands of miles apart.

- But if our love was real,

you know, we can cover that.

- The "if"

is doing all the lifting
in that statement.

- You saying it wasn't real?

- I'm just saying

that whatever it was,

it obviously wasn't enough
for you.

You need to own it, Floyd.

You made your choice.

And so have I.

- Evie--

[somber piano music]

♪

[line rings]

- Hi, Gwen.
- Is everything okay?

- No, no, no,
everything's fine.

- Um, uh...

Well, we were just wondering
if, um,

you might be able to come over.

Uh,

a few days a week?

I think Luna really needs ya.

And, uh,

I think I really need the help.

["By the Time It Gets Dark"
by Yo La Tengo playing]

- ♪ Baby, every cloud
has a silver lining ♪

♪ Baby, every dog
really has its day ♪

♪ And it matters to me
to see you smiling ♪

♪ Why don't we blow
all your cares away ♪

♪ Yesterday's gone
and will be forgotten ♪

♪ And today is where
every new day starts ♪

- Hey.
- Hey.

- How was your day?

- Ugh, long. How 'bout yours?

- Oh, my God, so long.
So long.

Can you remind me
whose bright idea it was

to put a full-length mirror
in our bedroom?

- Uh, yours?

- [chuckles]
Course.

Glutton for punishment.

[exhales deeply]

Vijay resigned today.

- Oh, no, really?

- Yeah, I was really
upset about it for

most of the day, actually.

Selfishly.

He validates me, you know.
- Mm-hmm.

Waiting most of my life
for a father figure

to tell me that
I'm good enough.

Now he's gone.

- Hey, I'm sorry.
- [sighs]

It's okay.

Because I, um,

I think it's time
that I start to feel

like I'm good enough on my own.

I want to look in this mirror

and I want to see someone...

Good enough.

- ♪ By the evening
we'll be laughing ♪

♪ Just wait and see
all the changes there'll be ♪

♪ By the time it gets dark

- You are...

more than good enough.

- ♪ By the evening
we'll be laughing ♪

- You're beautiful.

- ♪ Just wait and see
all the changes there'll be ♪

♪ By the time it gets dark

- No. No, no, no,

Leave 'em on.

Leave 'em on.

- ♪ By the time it gets dark

♪ By the time it gets dark