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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,101 --> 00:00:03,336 (knocking) 2 00:00:01,101 --> 00:00:03,336 Come in. 3 00:00:03,403 --> 00:00:04,504 Hey, the movie's about to star... 4 00:00:04,571 --> 00:00:06,539 Whoa! It's, like, 5 00:00:06,606 --> 00:00:08,308 a thousand degrees in here. 6 00:00:08,375 --> 00:00:11,678 It feels like when me and my friends hotboxed a sauna. 7 00:00:11,745 --> 00:00:14,581 You young people make drugs so complicated. 8 00:00:14,647 --> 00:00:17,717 Just light up a blunt, sit back, enjoy the ride. 9 00:00:17,784 --> 00:00:20,453 Norma, is that a space heater? 10 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:22,255 You're not supposed to have that. 11 00:00:22,322 --> 00:00:24,524 I'm also not supposed to freeze to death. 12 00:00:24,591 --> 00:00:26,659 I bought it at a thrift store for four bucks. 13 00:00:26,726 --> 00:00:29,028 It only shocks you when you plug it in. 14 00:00:29,095 --> 00:00:31,731 Why don't you just turn up the thermostat? 15 00:00:31,798 --> 00:00:33,800 Management disabled them. 16 00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:36,403 Apparently we're not able to take care of ourselves. 17 00:00:36,469 --> 00:00:39,372 I wish they would start treating us like adults. 18 00:00:39,439 --> 00:00:41,674 Have a little faith. 19 00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:46,479 (crackling pops) 20 00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:50,383 ♪ The more you give ♪ 21 00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:50,383 ♪ The more you give ♪ 22 00:00:50,450 --> 00:00:52,552 ♪ The more you live ♪ 23 00:00:50,450 --> 00:00:52,552 ♪ The more you live ♪ 24 00:00:52,619 --> 00:00:56,156 ♪ Your happiness is relative ♪ 25 00:00:52,619 --> 00:00:56,156 ♪ Happiness ♪ 26 00:00:56,222 --> 00:00:59,058 ♪ But if you're feeling like crap ♪ 27 00:00:59,125 --> 00:01:00,660 ♪ It's time to face the fact ♪ 28 00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:02,529 ♪ It's your prerogative ♪ 29 00:01:02,595 --> 00:01:03,830 ♪ Your prerogative ♪ 30 00:01:03,897 --> 00:01:06,099 ♪ To be positive. ♪ 31 00:01:15,575 --> 00:01:16,743 Okay, you're all set. 32 00:01:16,810 --> 00:01:18,178 (robot voice): Robot Drew. 33 00:01:18,244 --> 00:01:20,847 Powering up. (whirring) 34 00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:22,449 I can pinch this tube 35 00:01:22,515 --> 00:01:24,751 and it's domo arigato, Mr. Roboto. 36 00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:26,753 It's all right, I'm just joshing. 37 00:01:26,820 --> 00:01:28,721 Oh, you mean you're not really a robot? 38 00:01:30,890 --> 00:01:32,692 Hey, what you doing tonight? 39 00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:35,361 Well, I was planning on reading over the terms and conditions 40 00:01:35,428 --> 00:01:38,598 after the new iPhone update, but I could be swayed. 41 00:01:38,665 --> 00:01:40,667 I've been invited to this cigar lounge opening. 42 00:01:40,733 --> 00:01:42,435 (singsongy): And they gave me a plus-one. 43 00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:43,803 Seriously? 44 00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:43,803 Mm-hmm. 45 00:01:43,870 --> 00:01:45,672 Drew Dunbar, plus-one. 46 00:01:45,738 --> 00:01:47,674 It does have a nice ring to it. 47 00:01:47,740 --> 00:01:49,742 Keep it on the D.L. I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings. 48 00:01:49,809 --> 00:01:51,144 Oh. 49 00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:53,179 (robot voice): Information encrypted. 50 00:01:53,246 --> 00:01:55,381 And keep Robot Drew's ass at home. 51 00:01:56,282 --> 00:01:58,885 I promise, with my brains and your brawn, 52 00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:00,753 we could totally win The Amazing Race. 53 00:02:00,820 --> 00:02:03,223 Jerry, I love you, but I would strangle you 54 00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:05,391 before we were out of the first country. 55 00:02:06,493 --> 00:02:07,660 What's going on? 56 00:02:07,727 --> 00:02:08,862 What? (clears throat) Me? Nothing. 57 00:02:08,928 --> 00:02:09,863 Nothing, nothing 58 00:02:09,929 --> 00:02:11,164 at all, everything here is 59 00:02:11,231 --> 00:02:14,267 totally normal, just hanging out. 60 00:02:14,334 --> 00:02:16,302 Dunbar, are you hiding something? 61 00:02:16,369 --> 00:02:17,470 Because I will get it out of you. 62 00:02:17,537 --> 00:02:19,772 Hey, Sam, you met Robot Drew? Power up. 63 00:02:19,839 --> 00:02:21,841 I'm gonna ask you a few questions and I will know 64 00:02:21,908 --> 00:02:22,742 if you're lying. Question one... 65 00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:24,844 Eli invited me to a cigar lounge tonight. 66 00:02:29,349 --> 00:02:31,451 Dinner's at 6:00. 67 00:02:31,518 --> 00:02:32,919 Gina says you guys eat late around here. 68 00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:35,255 Norma. 69 00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:36,189 Hello. 70 00:02:37,524 --> 00:02:39,292 Why? 71 00:02:39,359 --> 00:02:41,794 She accidentally set her room on fire. 72 00:02:41,861 --> 00:02:42,829 But don't worry. 73 00:02:42,896 --> 00:02:44,597 No one was hurt and most 74 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:47,200 of the residents thought it was s'mores night. 75 00:02:47,267 --> 00:02:48,601 I see. 76 00:02:48,668 --> 00:02:49,903 A word please? 77 00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:54,207 What do you want from me? 78 00:02:54,274 --> 00:02:56,809 Her daughter is useless and she had nowhere to go. 79 00:02:56,876 --> 00:02:58,545 So you brought home an arsonist, 80 00:02:58,611 --> 00:03:00,179 and put her in front of an open flame? 81 00:03:00,246 --> 00:03:01,814 I couldn't drop her off at the fire station. 82 00:03:01,881 --> 00:03:03,583 They're pretty mad at her right now. 83 00:03:03,650 --> 00:03:05,885 Well, she can't stay here. There's no room. 84 00:03:05,952 --> 00:03:08,521 You know where else they didn't have room, Drew? 85 00:03:08,588 --> 00:03:11,491 All the inns in Bethlehem. 86 00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:15,194 Okay, fine. 87 00:03:15,261 --> 00:03:17,597 But this is it. You've brought home cats, dogs 88 00:03:17,664 --> 00:03:20,199 and now a senior citizen-- no more! 89 00:03:21,501 --> 00:03:22,602 (doorbell rings) 90 00:03:22,669 --> 00:03:23,937 NORMA: I'll get it! 91 00:03:24,003 --> 00:03:25,905 It's probably my Amazon package. 92 00:03:25,972 --> 00:03:27,774 You're getting deliveries here? 93 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:29,409 Terrific. 94 00:03:29,475 --> 00:03:31,678 Oh, well. 95 00:03:31,744 --> 00:03:34,213 It's not what I ordered, but I'll keep it. 96 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:35,782 Hey, guys. 97 00:03:35,848 --> 00:03:37,483 Uh, Norma, this is my friend Eli. 98 00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:39,352 We are in dialysis together. 99 00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:40,920 Oh, you need a new kidney, too? 100 00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:41,988 Yeah. 101 00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:41,988 Geez. 102 00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:43,690 The life expectancy around here 103 00:03:43,756 --> 00:03:44,958 is worse than the home. 104 00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:48,261 Hey, are you guys going out? 105 00:03:48,328 --> 00:03:51,331 Yes, VIP cigar lounge opening. 106 00:03:51,397 --> 00:03:53,800 Just two cool guys out on the town. 107 00:03:53,866 --> 00:03:55,468 Lock up your wives, am I right? 108 00:03:55,535 --> 00:03:56,903 (chuckles) Oh, no. 109 00:03:56,970 --> 00:03:58,471 I don't really mean "lock them up." 110 00:03:58,538 --> 00:04:00,707 That's just me doing a character from another time. 111 00:04:02,308 --> 00:04:03,009 How come you're not dressed? 112 00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,444 I am. 113 00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:06,946 Not. 114 00:04:07,013 --> 00:04:08,247 Be right back. 115 00:04:09,515 --> 00:04:10,817 Hey, I got to say... 116 00:04:10,883 --> 00:04:12,018 you clean up nice. 117 00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,987 Oh, this is nothing. 118 00:04:14,053 --> 00:04:15,355 No, no, come on. Do a little spin. 119 00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:17,290 Hey, hey. 120 00:04:17,357 --> 00:04:19,692 Yes, okay. 121 00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:21,394 Eli Russell, I see you. 122 00:04:21,461 --> 00:04:22,428 All right. 123 00:04:21,461 --> 00:04:22,428 Oh, wait, hold on. 124 00:04:22,495 --> 00:04:23,997 Your collar's popped. 125 00:04:24,063 --> 00:04:25,932 Wouldn't want your fans to think you're 126 00:04:25,999 --> 00:04:28,635 setting a fashion trend or something. 127 00:04:28,701 --> 00:04:29,969 Actually, it's that way on purpose. 128 00:04:30,036 --> 00:04:32,038 If I look too good, I'm not approachable. 129 00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:33,006 Okay. 130 00:04:33,072 --> 00:04:35,274 Popped it is. 131 00:04:36,009 --> 00:04:38,945 Okay, all set. 132 00:04:39,012 --> 00:04:41,280 (grunting rhythmically) 133 00:04:41,347 --> 00:04:43,449 (chuckles) 134 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:47,353 Is the chain too much? 135 00:04:48,488 --> 00:04:49,989 It's too much, okay. 136 00:04:50,056 --> 00:04:51,824 Um, would you put this 137 00:04:51,891 --> 00:04:53,793 back in Maddie's jewelry box? 138 00:04:56,462 --> 00:04:59,065 Wow, couple of VIPs. 139 00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:00,366 You know, I always 140 00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:01,968 considered myself a man of the people, 141 00:05:02,035 --> 00:05:04,437 but it turns out I don't really like the people. 142 00:05:04,504 --> 00:05:06,472 Just so you know, everything here? 143 00:05:06,539 --> 00:05:07,473 On the house. 144 00:05:07,540 --> 00:05:08,508 Wow. Seriously? 145 00:05:08,574 --> 00:05:09,509 Yeah. 146 00:05:09,575 --> 00:05:11,377 Okay. 147 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:15,014 Whoa! A guy could really caramelize 148 00:05:15,081 --> 00:05:17,083 a crème brûlée with this thing. 149 00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:23,089 (coughing) 150 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,858 (clears throat) Smooth. 151 00:05:27,393 --> 00:05:29,996 I know this is bad for me, but how do I look? 152 00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:31,764 You look dope, man. 153 00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:33,666 Here, let's get a pic for my gram. 154 00:05:33,733 --> 00:05:34,934 Aw, that's sweet of you. 155 00:05:35,001 --> 00:05:36,669 You're a good grandson. 156 00:05:36,736 --> 00:05:37,670 My Instagram. 157 00:05:37,737 --> 00:05:39,338 Right, yes, duh. 158 00:05:39,405 --> 00:05:40,707 The gram. 159 00:05:40,773 --> 00:05:42,475 But you should still sent one to your grandmother. 160 00:05:43,910 --> 00:05:45,344 Smile. 161 00:05:45,411 --> 00:05:46,646 Not that big. 162 00:05:46,713 --> 00:05:48,614 Just a normal smile. 163 00:05:48,681 --> 00:05:50,349 Relax your mouth. 164 00:05:51,417 --> 00:05:53,653 Okay, maybe this one's just for my personal account. 165 00:05:53,720 --> 00:05:57,056 ♪ I fall in love... ♪ 166 00:05:57,123 --> 00:05:58,458 I love this song. 167 00:05:58,524 --> 00:05:59,959 Oh, you know Chet Baker? 168 00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:02,528 The "Prince of Cool"? Yes, I know him. 169 00:06:02,595 --> 00:06:05,631 Oh, nice. I grew up listening to my dad's jazz collection. 170 00:06:05,698 --> 00:06:08,701 Oh, I grew up listening to my dad scream four-letter words. 171 00:06:08,768 --> 00:06:11,537 But I played jazz to drown him out. 172 00:06:11,604 --> 00:06:13,372 Well, look what the cat dragged in. 173 00:06:13,439 --> 00:06:14,107 Oh, hey, Nina. 174 00:06:14,173 --> 00:06:15,007 Good to see you. 175 00:06:15,074 --> 00:06:16,075 Who's your friend? 176 00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:17,443 Oh, this is my boy, Drew. 177 00:06:17,510 --> 00:06:18,845 Very important psychologist. 178 00:06:18,911 --> 00:06:20,146 And recently divorced. 179 00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:21,748 Welcome back to the fun side. 180 00:06:21,814 --> 00:06:22,849 I like your jacket. 181 00:06:22,915 --> 00:06:24,650 Oh, thank you. Um, question. 182 00:06:24,717 --> 00:06:27,086 Would you have liked it better if it had a chain over it? 183 00:06:27,153 --> 00:06:28,821 You're funny. 184 00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:29,956 Bye, Eli. 185 00:06:30,022 --> 00:06:31,791 Bye, Nina. 186 00:06:31,858 --> 00:06:33,392 Wait, so you two...? 187 00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:35,995 Ah, nah, we just hook up sometimes. 188 00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:38,564 (chuckles): Okay, Eli. Oh. 189 00:06:38,631 --> 00:06:40,700 The girl I hooked up with, I married. 190 00:06:41,734 --> 00:06:43,536 Man, I cannot believe this is your life. 191 00:06:43,603 --> 00:06:45,138 Mm, it's all right. 192 00:06:45,204 --> 00:06:47,073 Sometimes I feel like dating is just 193 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:49,142 a revolving door of superficial women. 194 00:06:49,208 --> 00:06:52,678 Oh, yeah, and I bet having all that money sucks, too. 195 00:06:52,745 --> 00:06:55,715 Come on, man-- you've got a great kid, cozy house, 196 00:06:55,782 --> 00:06:58,017 you spent years with a woman that you loved. 197 00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,819 That's what I want. 198 00:06:59,886 --> 00:07:01,621 Okay, so what's stopping you? 199 00:07:01,687 --> 00:07:04,924 I don't know if women are into me or the fame and the riches. 200 00:07:04,991 --> 00:07:07,493 Well, I hope you don't think that's all you have to offer. 201 00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:09,061 I don't know. 202 00:07:09,128 --> 00:07:10,797 Maybe. 203 00:07:10,863 --> 00:07:12,932 Eli, you're a great guy. 204 00:07:12,999 --> 00:07:14,634 The right woman's gonna see that. 205 00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:16,435 Thanks, man. 206 00:07:16,502 --> 00:07:18,471 From one Prince of Cool to the other. 207 00:07:18,538 --> 00:07:19,472 Ah! 208 00:07:19,539 --> 00:07:21,541 (imitates drumbeat) 209 00:07:22,542 --> 00:07:23,976 This is nice. 210 00:07:24,043 --> 00:07:26,679 I haven't cooked in a real kitchen for such a long time. 211 00:07:26,746 --> 00:07:30,650 The only spices they give us at Valley Hills are salt. 212 00:07:30,716 --> 00:07:33,152 Well, this kitchen is all yours. Oh. 213 00:07:33,219 --> 00:07:34,654 And don't worry, 214 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,589 Drew has plenty of fire insurance. 215 00:07:36,656 --> 00:07:37,957 Thank you. 216 00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:39,458 Where do you keep your cinnamon? 217 00:07:39,525 --> 00:07:40,793 Oh, um, it's in the cabinet. 218 00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:42,695 I'll get it. 219 00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:42,695 Oh, wait. 220 00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:44,597 I can get it, stop it! 221 00:07:44,664 --> 00:07:46,132 Okay, just trying to help. 222 00:07:46,199 --> 00:07:48,134 I'm sorry. 223 00:07:48,201 --> 00:07:50,503 Just a little sensitive about people 224 00:07:50,570 --> 00:07:52,672 treating me like I'm helpless. 225 00:07:52,738 --> 00:07:55,141 People like my daughter. 226 00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:56,742 Amy. 227 00:07:56,809 --> 00:07:58,811 She pushed me into Valley Hills. 228 00:07:58,878 --> 00:08:00,880 She thinks I'm old 229 00:08:00,947 --> 00:08:03,015 and feeble like those other geezers. 230 00:08:05,017 --> 00:08:07,053 Okay, that-that's a peach, not Amy. 231 00:08:08,855 --> 00:08:10,256 What's wonderful though is... 232 00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:12,258 if you hadn't been there, then... 233 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,926 we never would've met. 234 00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:16,495 You're the best thing to come out of it. 235 00:08:16,562 --> 00:08:18,164 That and you reprogrammed 236 00:08:18,231 --> 00:08:20,266 my Life Alert to call the deli. 237 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:23,002 Good evening, lovely ladies. 238 00:08:23,069 --> 00:08:24,704 Your VIPs have returned. 239 00:08:24,770 --> 00:08:25,938 Hmm. 240 00:08:26,005 --> 00:08:29,141 Drew Dunbar, do I detect a swagger? 241 00:08:29,208 --> 00:08:30,509 Oh, you should have seen him. 242 00:08:30,576 --> 00:08:32,011 This guy's got game. 243 00:08:32,078 --> 00:08:33,980 He even learned a new move. Show her. 244 00:08:35,581 --> 00:08:37,149 Sup? 245 00:08:38,217 --> 00:08:39,852 Whoa! 246 00:08:39,919 --> 00:08:42,154 Give a lady some warning. 247 00:08:42,221 --> 00:08:44,524 It was great-- three different women 248 00:08:44,590 --> 00:08:45,791 asked me if I was somebody. 249 00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:47,526 I'm not, but still. 250 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:49,262 Hey, what's going down in here? 251 00:08:49,328 --> 00:08:50,563 Oh, Norma's making 252 00:08:50,630 --> 00:08:52,298 her very famous peach cobbler. 253 00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,000 I've been making this recipe 254 00:08:54,066 --> 00:08:55,668 for 50 years. 255 00:08:54,066 --> 00:08:55,668 Oh, I would 256 00:08:55,735 --> 00:08:57,737 check your math, because you don't look a day over 40. 257 00:08:57,803 --> 00:09:00,239 Oh, I like this one. 258 00:09:00,306 --> 00:09:02,275 Oh, and they gave us some free wine and cigars. 259 00:09:02,341 --> 00:09:04,176 So shall we adjourn to the backyard 260 00:09:04,243 --> 00:09:05,745 and continue the party? 261 00:09:05,811 --> 00:09:07,280 Well, that sounds good. 262 00:09:07,346 --> 00:09:09,181 I haven't had a cigar 263 00:09:09,248 --> 00:09:11,584 since I was pregnant with my daughter. 264 00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:14,720 It was a different time. 265 00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:16,222 Ten years ago wasn't a different time. 266 00:09:16,289 --> 00:09:18,824 Hey, less is more, big guy. 267 00:09:20,092 --> 00:09:22,895 I'm telling you, women were all over this guy. 268 00:09:22,962 --> 00:09:24,297 And it wasn't just the Super Bowl ring, 269 00:09:24,363 --> 00:09:26,599 because he let me wear it, and nothing. 270 00:09:26,666 --> 00:09:28,234 It's not hard at these events. 271 00:09:28,301 --> 00:09:29,902 Women love the fame thing. 272 00:09:29,969 --> 00:09:32,872 Otherwise I'd have to rely on my charm and good looks. 273 00:09:32,939 --> 00:09:35,107 Well, you're not falling back on your modesty. 274 00:09:35,174 --> 00:09:36,342 What's your opener? 275 00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:38,878 Uh, "I'm famous"? 276 00:09:38,945 --> 00:09:40,046 That's not the opener. 277 00:09:40,112 --> 00:09:41,714 That's the closer. 278 00:09:41,781 --> 00:09:44,216 Well, in my face. 279 00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:46,852 (chuckles softly) I guess. 280 00:09:46,919 --> 00:09:49,322 Ah, don't listen to her, you've got the whole package. 281 00:09:49,388 --> 00:09:51,023 Charm, brains... 282 00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:53,793 and that shayna punim. Oh! 283 00:09:53,859 --> 00:09:55,328 (chuckles) Thanks. 284 00:09:55,394 --> 00:09:56,495 Wasn't always like this. 285 00:09:56,562 --> 00:09:58,631 Back in high school before I started playing football, 286 00:09:58,698 --> 00:10:00,599 I used to get teased for being the fat kid. 287 00:10:00,666 --> 00:10:01,968 No way. Really? 288 00:10:00,666 --> 00:10:01,968 Yeah. 289 00:10:02,034 --> 00:10:05,705 Ate a lot of chips so they used to call me Eli Ruffles. 290 00:10:05,771 --> 00:10:07,039 You out of shape? 291 00:10:05,771 --> 00:10:07,039 Yeah. 292 00:10:07,106 --> 00:10:08,107 I never would've guessed that. 293 00:10:08,174 --> 00:10:09,141 DREW: I used to get teased 294 00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:10,343 for being the skinny kid. 295 00:10:10,409 --> 00:10:11,344 And the nerdy kid. 296 00:10:11,410 --> 00:10:12,745 And the kid who almost died 297 00:10:12,812 --> 00:10:14,914 from being trapped under his own tuba. 298 00:10:14,981 --> 00:10:17,183 That I would have guessed. 299 00:10:18,184 --> 00:10:19,318 Anyway, it's getting late. 300 00:10:19,385 --> 00:10:21,087 I'm off to bed. 301 00:10:21,153 --> 00:10:22,688 And who knows? 302 00:10:22,755 --> 00:10:25,124 Maybe I might post a few pics on my gram. 303 00:10:25,191 --> 00:10:27,159 That's Instagram, not grandma. 304 00:10:27,226 --> 00:10:29,695 I can't believe some idiots make that mistake. 305 00:10:29,762 --> 00:10:31,364 Ah... 306 00:10:31,430 --> 00:10:32,965 Norma, I think the cobbler's done. 307 00:10:33,032 --> 00:10:34,400 Oh, crap. 308 00:10:38,337 --> 00:10:40,840 Well, I am dying 309 00:10:40,906 --> 00:10:44,343 to hear some of these famous Eli Russell pickup lines. 310 00:10:44,410 --> 00:10:45,311 Wait, wait, wait, let me guess. 311 00:10:45,378 --> 00:10:46,379 "Hey, baby, 312 00:10:46,445 --> 00:10:48,147 "are you a parking ticket? 313 00:10:48,214 --> 00:10:52,151 'Cause you've got 'fine' written all over you." 314 00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:55,254 Come on, the only line I need is, "Hi, I'm Eli Russell." 315 00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:57,656 (chuckles): Oh. And...? 316 00:10:57,723 --> 00:10:59,892 And what? I won a Super Bowl. 317 00:10:59,959 --> 00:11:01,861 Oof. No, no, no, no. That would not work on me. 318 00:11:01,927 --> 00:11:03,329 Oh, yeah? 319 00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:04,697 What's your best line, hotshot? 320 00:11:04,764 --> 00:11:06,298 Oh, I don't need any lines. 321 00:11:06,365 --> 00:11:08,734 I've got a move. 322 00:11:06,365 --> 00:11:08,734 Oh, okay. 323 00:11:08,801 --> 00:11:10,369 What is it, tossing your hair back? 324 00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:11,437 Licking your lips? 325 00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:14,673 Accidentally backing into me on the dance floor? 326 00:11:14,740 --> 00:11:15,841 (laughs) 327 00:11:15,908 --> 00:11:17,309 You're so funny. 328 00:11:17,376 --> 00:11:19,311 You think so? 329 00:11:17,376 --> 00:11:19,311 And that's the move. 330 00:11:19,378 --> 00:11:20,880 Oh... 331 00:11:20,946 --> 00:11:23,115 Okay, you got me. 332 00:11:23,182 --> 00:11:25,384 Course anything you do is pretty damn hard to resist. 333 00:11:25,451 --> 00:11:27,386 (scoffs) 334 00:11:28,788 --> 00:11:30,756 Oh, you got a little cigar ash on your cheek. 335 00:11:32,758 --> 00:11:34,260 Is this a move? 336 00:11:35,327 --> 00:11:37,396 I don't know. Is it? 337 00:11:48,174 --> 00:11:51,710 Sorry I'm late. Things got a little wild last night. 338 00:11:51,777 --> 00:11:54,280 Ugh. If these loafers could talk. 339 00:11:54,346 --> 00:11:57,917 Oh, they would say, "Put us on someone more interesting." 340 00:11:57,983 --> 00:11:59,718 So you guys had fun? 341 00:11:59,785 --> 00:12:01,754 You could say that. 342 00:12:01,821 --> 00:12:03,823 Smoked a few 'gars with my main man here, 343 00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:06,058 and got a lady's phone number. 344 00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:06,058 Ooh. 345 00:12:06,125 --> 00:12:07,893 I was supposed to pass that along to you, Eli, 346 00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:09,762 but I'm calling her anyway. 347 00:12:09,829 --> 00:12:11,897 How many times did you pretend you didn't know him? 348 00:12:11,964 --> 00:12:14,967 Drew? Not at all. Robot Drew, twice. 349 00:12:15,034 --> 00:12:15,935 (chuckles) 350 00:12:16,001 --> 00:12:17,002 But we had a good time. 351 00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:18,938 (robot voice): Speaking of good time... 352 00:12:19,004 --> 00:12:20,739 (chuckles): He's back. 353 00:12:20,806 --> 00:12:21,874 Esperanza Spalding 354 00:12:21,941 --> 00:12:23,742 is playing at The Blue Note Saturday, 355 00:12:23,809 --> 00:12:27,480 if you want to join me for a little J-A-Z-Z. 356 00:12:27,546 --> 00:12:29,215 Oh, I actually got a thing on Saturday. 357 00:12:29,281 --> 00:12:30,316 I thought Gina would've told you. 358 00:12:30,382 --> 00:12:31,383 Gina? Why? 359 00:12:31,450 --> 00:12:32,485 My plans are with her. 360 00:12:32,551 --> 00:12:34,386 My Gina? Like, a date? 361 00:12:34,453 --> 00:12:35,754 JERRY: Oh, boy. 362 00:12:35,821 --> 00:12:37,356 Dialysis drama. 363 00:12:37,423 --> 00:12:39,191 No, no, no drama. I'm... 364 00:12:39,258 --> 00:12:41,861 I'm glad you guys hit it off. 365 00:12:39,258 --> 00:12:41,861 We really did. 366 00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:44,396 And I don't kiss and tell... 367 00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:44,396 Well, then, don't. 368 00:12:44,463 --> 00:12:46,765 It's a dialysis center, not a locker room. 369 00:12:46,832 --> 00:12:48,767 You don't hear Jerry bragging about his erotic escapades. 370 00:12:48,834 --> 00:12:52,404 Course not. Like a gentleman, I save it for my podcast. 371 00:12:52,471 --> 00:12:54,306 Wow. You learn something new 372 00:12:54,373 --> 00:12:56,242 you don't want to know every day. 373 00:12:57,276 --> 00:12:58,210 Tough break, Drew. 374 00:12:58,277 --> 00:12:59,778 Oh, guys, look, 375 00:12:59,845 --> 00:13:00,880 Gina and I are not a thing. 376 00:13:00,946 --> 00:13:02,448 GIDEON: No, I mean, 377 00:13:02,515 --> 00:13:05,384 boy gets donor, donor falls in love with other patient, 378 00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:07,853 other patient gets kidney, boy gets screwed. 379 00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:10,523 Oldest story in the dialysis room. 380 00:13:10,589 --> 00:13:11,957 Come on, I couldn't do that to you. 381 00:13:12,024 --> 00:13:12,925 SAMANTHA: I could. 382 00:13:12,992 --> 00:13:14,827 Is Gina sexually curious? 383 00:13:17,496 --> 00:13:19,165 Hey. How was dialysis? 384 00:13:19,231 --> 00:13:20,833 Fine. 385 00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:22,468 I have come to understand that you 386 00:13:22,535 --> 00:13:24,937 are going on a date with Eli. 387 00:13:25,004 --> 00:13:26,038 Oh, yeah, he's cooking me dinner. 388 00:13:26,105 --> 00:13:27,173 NORMA: Oh, I like Eli. 389 00:13:27,239 --> 00:13:29,542 Get it, girl. 390 00:13:29,608 --> 00:13:31,844 Yes. "Get it." 391 00:13:33,245 --> 00:13:36,849 I'm just surprised you didn't tell me. 392 00:13:36,916 --> 00:13:38,350 Uh, I'm supposed to tell you 393 00:13:38,417 --> 00:13:40,519 every time that I go out with someone? 394 00:13:40,586 --> 00:13:43,189 No, just when you're going out with one of my friends. 395 00:13:43,255 --> 00:13:45,991 I've seen your Instagram. It's not gonna be a big problem. 396 00:13:46,058 --> 00:13:47,359 Don't you have a house to burn down? 397 00:13:48,961 --> 00:13:50,496 Eli and I are connected. 398 00:13:50,563 --> 00:13:52,531 We like the same music, 399 00:13:52,598 --> 00:13:54,133 we're gonna work out together. 400 00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:56,035 He calls me his boy. No one's ever called me that. 401 00:13:56,101 --> 00:13:57,203 Not even my dad. 402 00:13:57,269 --> 00:13:58,470 What does that have to do with me? 403 00:13:58,537 --> 00:14:00,539 (scoffs) I don't have many friends. 404 00:14:00,606 --> 00:14:02,208 I never have. 405 00:14:02,274 --> 00:14:03,943 You know that. You saw me in high school. 406 00:14:04,009 --> 00:14:05,511 You see me now. 407 00:14:04,009 --> 00:14:05,511 Drew, 408 00:14:05,578 --> 00:14:07,079 I am not trying to steal your friends. 409 00:14:07,146 --> 00:14:09,181 If you guys go out and things go well, 410 00:14:09,248 --> 00:14:10,416 I'm a third wheel. 411 00:14:10,482 --> 00:14:11,317 And if they don't, 412 00:14:11,383 --> 00:14:12,618 I have to choose a side. 413 00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,486 It's just a date. We're not picking out names 414 00:14:14,553 --> 00:14:15,521 for our kids or anything. 415 00:14:15,588 --> 00:14:17,089 There are millions of guys out there. 416 00:14:17,156 --> 00:14:20,025 You could date any one of them. This guy's mine. 417 00:14:20,092 --> 00:14:21,860 And I don't care how that sounds. 418 00:14:21,927 --> 00:14:24,129 Eli and Drew forever. 419 00:14:25,130 --> 00:14:27,233 We're boys! 420 00:14:27,299 --> 00:14:30,469 Oh, my God. What is his problem? 421 00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:33,172 Well, isn't it obvious? He's jealous. 422 00:14:33,239 --> 00:14:34,640 What? Ugh, no way. 423 00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:36,508 Drew and I are just friends. 424 00:14:36,575 --> 00:14:40,145 Oh, please. You're beautiful, you're smart, you're funny, 425 00:14:40,212 --> 00:14:42,281 and you're saving his life. 426 00:14:42,348 --> 00:14:45,184 The poor schlemiel never had a chance. 427 00:14:47,419 --> 00:14:49,255 Hello. 428 00:14:47,419 --> 00:14:49,255 Hey. 429 00:14:49,321 --> 00:14:52,591 (gasps) Oh, my God. 430 00:14:52,658 --> 00:14:55,894 I love your place. 431 00:14:55,961 --> 00:14:59,331 It's like if Martha Stewart went to Foot Locker. 432 00:14:59,398 --> 00:15:00,566 Thanks. 433 00:15:00,633 --> 00:15:02,167 Here. I got you these. 434 00:15:02,234 --> 00:15:04,670 Aw. 435 00:15:02,234 --> 00:15:04,670 And these. 436 00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:06,038 Oh. 437 00:15:06,105 --> 00:15:07,539 And these. 438 00:15:06,105 --> 00:15:07,539 Please stop. 439 00:15:07,606 --> 00:15:09,575 I didn't know which ones you'd like. 440 00:15:09,642 --> 00:15:11,577 Red roses: classic or cliché? 441 00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:13,279 Daisies: cute or too young? 442 00:15:13,345 --> 00:15:16,382 Lilies: too smelly or just smelly enough? 443 00:15:16,448 --> 00:15:19,918 Do you buy three bouquets for every girl you date? 444 00:15:19,985 --> 00:15:22,087 Normally I buy them an Uber home, but... 445 00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:24,556 ...you're not every girl. 446 00:15:24,623 --> 00:15:26,959 Well, you're not every guy I date. 447 00:15:27,026 --> 00:15:29,061 (chuckles) 448 00:15:27,026 --> 00:15:29,061 Unless this is your mom's house 449 00:15:29,128 --> 00:15:30,696 and you live in the basement. 450 00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:32,398 No. 451 00:15:32,464 --> 00:15:34,633 That was really, 452 00:15:34,700 --> 00:15:37,970 really, really sweet. 453 00:15:38,037 --> 00:15:39,204 (laughs softly) 454 00:15:42,007 --> 00:15:43,108 Wow. 455 00:15:43,175 --> 00:15:44,276 I never thought I'd be grateful 456 00:15:44,343 --> 00:15:45,444 for having renal failure. 457 00:15:45,511 --> 00:15:46,578 What do you mean? 458 00:15:46,645 --> 00:15:47,680 Well, that's how I met Drew 459 00:15:47,746 --> 00:15:49,114 and that's how I met you. 460 00:15:55,020 --> 00:15:56,622 (grunts) Oh, I'm so sorry. 461 00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:59,458 Uh, um, are we sure this is a good idea? 462 00:15:59,525 --> 00:16:00,592 Uh, I was until about two seconds ago. 463 00:16:00,659 --> 00:16:02,361 Well, it's just that, 464 00:16:02,428 --> 00:16:04,730 Drew and I are close, and I'm giving him my kidney. 465 00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,131 And you two are friends, and it just, 466 00:16:06,198 --> 00:16:07,666 it just... it just feels tangled. 467 00:16:07,733 --> 00:16:09,401 Tangled? 468 00:16:07,733 --> 00:16:09,401 Well, 469 00:16:09,468 --> 00:16:10,536 Drew thinks that you are the coolest, 470 00:16:10,602 --> 00:16:12,671 and I don't want to mess with that. 471 00:16:12,738 --> 00:16:14,373 It won't. We won't. 472 00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:15,674 Yeah, but... 473 00:16:15,741 --> 00:16:17,576 You know Drew. 474 00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:18,811 He's... 475 00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:18,811 Yeah. 476 00:16:18,877 --> 00:16:22,147 It was kind of awkward when I told him we were going out. 477 00:16:22,214 --> 00:16:27,052 So, maybe it's better if we stop before we start? 478 00:16:27,119 --> 00:16:29,321 Yeah, I can see that. 479 00:16:29,388 --> 00:16:32,558 I don't want to hurt Drew. That's my boy. 480 00:16:32,624 --> 00:16:34,560 So I've heard. 481 00:16:36,328 --> 00:16:39,998 Ugh. So I guess I should just get going. 482 00:16:40,065 --> 00:16:41,333 (chuckles) 483 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:44,603 Um, thank you for having me over. 484 00:16:46,071 --> 00:16:47,740 We're just friends? 485 00:16:47,806 --> 00:16:49,708 With no benefits. 486 00:16:49,775 --> 00:16:51,710 (laughs): Oh... 487 00:16:51,777 --> 00:16:53,345 (moans): Oh... 488 00:16:54,346 --> 00:16:55,714 Mmm. 489 00:16:55,781 --> 00:16:57,616 (quietly): Oh, my God. 490 00:16:59,518 --> 00:17:00,552 Goodbye, Eli. 491 00:17:00,619 --> 00:17:04,323 Goodbye, Eli's pecs. 492 00:17:04,390 --> 00:17:05,724 (laughs) 493 00:17:05,791 --> 00:17:07,126 See you later. 494 00:17:11,497 --> 00:17:12,664 (exhales) 495 00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:15,701 (knocking on door) 496 00:17:17,403 --> 00:17:19,138 (clears throat) 497 00:17:20,239 --> 00:17:21,340 Oh. 498 00:17:21,407 --> 00:17:23,776 Hello. What's going on? 499 00:17:23,842 --> 00:17:28,180 This nice officer just brought me home, son. 500 00:17:28,247 --> 00:17:32,184 And what exactly is the problem, Mother? 501 00:17:32,251 --> 00:17:35,120 She was driving your car and blew through a stop sign. 502 00:17:35,187 --> 00:17:36,655 My car? (clears throat) 503 00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:37,589 You took my car? 504 00:17:37,656 --> 00:17:40,559 She had no license and seemed very confused, 505 00:17:40,626 --> 00:17:41,693 so I brought her home. 506 00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:43,829 Thank you for that, Officer. 507 00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:45,364 I can take it from here. 508 00:17:45,431 --> 00:17:46,799 Come on in, Mom. 509 00:17:46,865 --> 00:17:49,168 I will mash up your pills in your pudding, 510 00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:50,602 just like how you like it. 511 00:17:50,669 --> 00:17:52,704 (chuckles) 512 00:17:52,771 --> 00:17:54,540 Good acting. 513 00:17:54,606 --> 00:17:56,675 Richard Gere, watch out. 514 00:17:56,742 --> 00:17:58,210 You took my car? 515 00:17:58,277 --> 00:17:59,478 I know, I should have asked. 516 00:17:59,545 --> 00:18:02,714 But you were out of basil and the keys were just sitting here. 517 00:18:02,781 --> 00:18:04,216 You don't have a license, Norma. 518 00:18:04,283 --> 00:18:07,486 I know, but I love the feeling 519 00:18:07,553 --> 00:18:10,155 of being independent again. 520 00:18:10,222 --> 00:18:11,490 I can cook here, 521 00:18:11,557 --> 00:18:14,560 I can come and go without signing a stupid log. 522 00:18:14,626 --> 00:18:16,728 Feels so wonderful to remember 523 00:18:16,795 --> 00:18:20,432 what my life was like before Valley Hills. 524 00:18:20,499 --> 00:18:23,702 Well, I'm sure that was quite the adjustment. 525 00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:27,306 This isn't exactly how I thought I'd end up, you know. 526 00:18:28,407 --> 00:18:29,708 My plan for my golden years 527 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:32,678 was to watch the sunset from an Italian villa. 528 00:18:32,744 --> 00:18:34,313 So, what happened? 529 00:18:34,379 --> 00:18:38,183 My nest egg went poof in the housing crash, 530 00:18:38,250 --> 00:18:40,652 my husband died way too soon 531 00:18:40,719 --> 00:18:43,522 and my daughter thought that I couldn't live alone, 532 00:18:43,589 --> 00:18:46,658 so... here I am. 533 00:18:48,660 --> 00:18:51,296 Yeah. That's, uh, that's really tough. 534 00:18:51,363 --> 00:18:52,431 I'm sorry. 535 00:18:52,498 --> 00:18:56,702 Hmm. If I'm being honest, it's probably for the best. 536 00:18:56,768 --> 00:18:58,837 I didn't see that stop sign. 537 00:18:59,705 --> 00:19:01,473 Well, that's not necessarily age. 538 00:19:01,540 --> 00:19:03,442 We all miss stuff. 539 00:19:03,509 --> 00:19:05,911 There's a 50/50 chance I have two different shoes on. 540 00:19:07,346 --> 00:19:08,614 Nope. All good. 541 00:19:10,482 --> 00:19:12,618 It's not just tonight. 542 00:19:12,684 --> 00:19:13,785 It's everything. 543 00:19:13,852 --> 00:19:16,522 I don't hear so well anymore. 544 00:19:16,588 --> 00:19:19,858 I try to think of words and they're not there. 545 00:19:21,593 --> 00:19:25,631 I feel like I'm losing myself... 546 00:19:25,697 --> 00:19:27,366 a little at a time. 547 00:19:29,902 --> 00:19:32,304 Well, I don't know about that, Mom. 548 00:19:32,371 --> 00:19:34,273 (laughs softly) 549 00:19:32,371 --> 00:19:34,273 You still seem 550 00:19:34,339 --> 00:19:35,641 pretty sharp to me. 551 00:19:36,675 --> 00:19:37,676 Thank you, Derek. 552 00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:39,244 Uh, it's... 553 00:19:39,311 --> 00:19:41,880 I know it's Drew. I'm not gone yet. 554 00:19:44,750 --> 00:19:47,452 I'll tell you what. 555 00:19:47,519 --> 00:19:50,255 If you ever need a kitchen 556 00:19:50,322 --> 00:19:51,723 or just need to get away, 557 00:19:51,790 --> 00:19:53,392 you're always welcome here. 558 00:19:53,458 --> 00:19:56,795 You can consider this your own personal Italian villa. 559 00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:59,231 Oh, thank you. 560 00:19:59,298 --> 00:20:00,866 You're a good man. 561 00:20:02,034 --> 00:20:05,370 And with enough Chianti, I think I can make it work. 562 00:20:12,477 --> 00:20:13,979 (soft jazz playing) 563 00:20:14,046 --> 00:20:16,515 Mm. So glad you forgot your keys. 564 00:20:16,582 --> 00:20:18,917 (chuckles) Me, too. 565 00:20:18,984 --> 00:20:21,687 We don't have to tell Drew about this right away, right? 566 00:20:21,753 --> 00:20:24,323 Absolutely not. I watched enough Real Housewives 567 00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:26,425 to know that you always lie to a friend. 568 00:20:26,491 --> 00:20:28,794 Especially since I already texted him 569 00:20:28,860 --> 00:20:30,495 and said we broke it off. 570 00:20:30,562 --> 00:20:32,631 Maybe we tell him after the surgery, 571 00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:33,932 when it's less complicated. 572 00:20:33,999 --> 00:20:35,867 Okay. Good idea. 573 00:20:33,999 --> 00:20:35,867 Yeah. 574 00:20:35,934 --> 00:20:36,902 (both chuckle) 575 00:20:39,705 --> 00:20:43,308 By the way, it's daisies. 576 00:20:43,375 --> 00:20:44,309 What? 577 00:20:44,376 --> 00:20:46,778 They're my favorite. 578 00:20:47,846 --> 00:20:49,414 Good to know. 579 00:20:58,890 --> 00:21:00,892 Captioning sponsored by CBS 580 00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:03,962 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 581 00:21:04,012 --> 00:21:08,562 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 39265

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