Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,485 --> 00:00:01,061
(DOORBELL RINGS)
2
00:00:01,139 --> 00:00:02,429
LIONEL: Oh, that's the doorbell,
Daddy's gotta go.
3
00:00:02,521 --> 00:00:04,398
- Let go, Jayme, please! Oh!
- (GLASS SHATTERS)
4
00:00:04,432 --> 00:00:05,667
Let me go! Oh!
5
00:00:05,696 --> 00:00:08,368
(DOOR CREAKS OPEN)
6
00:00:08,409 --> 00:00:10,937
Uh... hello?
7
00:00:11,038 --> 00:00:13,940
You must be the Mr. Carlson.
Uh, I'm Bennett.
8
00:00:15,309 --> 00:00:16,810
Bennett! Bennett, yes!
9
00:00:16,911 --> 00:00:18,938
Yes, I've heard so much about you,
big fan!
10
00:00:18,973 --> 00:00:20,313
Huge-huge fan, actually.
11
00:00:20,414 --> 00:00:22,482
I'm so sorry,
I'm a bit of a mess right now.
12
00:00:22,583 --> 00:00:25,085
No! I don't see a mess.
13
00:00:25,186 --> 00:00:28,722
I just see a man trying
to provide for his family.
14
00:00:28,823 --> 00:00:31,057
Oh wow. Thank you.
15
00:00:32,160 --> 00:00:34,127
And might I say,
what a pleasure it has been
16
00:00:34,228 --> 00:00:35,695
getting to know your daughter, sir.
17
00:00:35,796 --> 00:00:38,165
You have done a great job raising her.
18
00:00:38,266 --> 00:00:39,866
Oh God.
19
00:00:39,967 --> 00:00:41,801
I-I'm so happy to hear someone say that,
20
00:00:41,903 --> 00:00:43,570
because you just try so hard,
21
00:00:43,671 --> 00:00:45,172
and you're just never
sure if you're making
22
00:00:45,273 --> 00:00:47,174
- the right moves as a parent...
- Don't be weird, Dad.
23
00:00:47,275 --> 00:00:49,176
Okay, there she is.
I'm not being weird! I'm not weird.
24
00:00:49,277 --> 00:00:51,244
- Am I, guys?
- It was good to meet you.
25
00:00:51,345 --> 00:00:53,880
- Did you bring the stuff?
- You know it.
26
00:00:53,981 --> 00:00:56,883
What are you doing to me, Alice Carlson?
27
00:00:56,984 --> 00:00:59,586
Okay, be good, you two!
28
00:00:59,687 --> 00:01:01,621
? From a distance ?
29
00:01:01,722 --> 00:01:05,158
? The Earth looks blue and green ?
30
00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:13,079
? And the snow-capped mountains white ?
31
00:01:13,114 --> 00:01:14,034
?
32
00:01:14,135 --> 00:01:17,270
? God is watching us ?
33
00:01:17,371 --> 00:01:20,840
? God is watching us ?
34
00:01:20,942 --> 00:01:23,210
? God is watching us ?
35
00:01:24,779 --> 00:01:27,380
? He is watching us ?
36
00:01:28,950 --> 00:01:31,251
? He is watching us ?
37
00:01:32,687 --> 00:01:35,355
? He is watching us ?
38
00:01:35,456 --> 00:01:37,390
? From a distance ?
39
00:01:38,926 --> 00:01:42,963
?
40
00:01:43,064 --> 00:01:45,498
? He is watching us ?
41
00:01:46,968 --> 00:01:48,668
? From a distance ?
42
00:01:50,538 --> 00:01:53,373
?
43
00:01:55,543 --> 00:01:57,244
I guess I just don't
understand the nature
44
00:01:57,345 --> 00:01:59,379
of your question.
45
00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:01,181
Hmm, weird, it made perfect sense to me,
46
00:02:01,282 --> 00:02:03,583
but I'm happy to rephrase
using smaller words.
47
00:02:03,684 --> 00:02:05,252
KATE: Remember our agreement, Alicia,
48
00:02:05,353 --> 00:02:07,053
Anne does your podcast,
as long as you treat her
49
00:02:07,154 --> 00:02:08,922
as you would any other
guest on your show.
50
00:02:09,023 --> 00:02:10,790
Well, maybe if she stopped looking at me
51
00:02:10,891 --> 00:02:12,392
with that tone of voice!
52
00:02:12,493 --> 00:02:14,194
We both know that's just Anne's face.
53
00:02:14,295 --> 00:02:15,929
- What?
- Anne.
54
00:02:16,030 --> 00:02:18,965
Fine. Go ahead, Alicia.
55
00:02:19,066 --> 00:02:20,667
All right. Ahem!
56
00:02:20,768 --> 00:02:23,203
I was asking you, Anne,
whether there's any
57
00:02:23,304 --> 00:02:25,705
real difference between
"hands-off parenting,"
58
00:02:25,806 --> 00:02:28,408
and, hm, I don't know,
deadbeat parenting?
59
00:02:28,509 --> 00:02:31,411
Okay. Fair question. Anne?
60
00:02:32,446 --> 00:02:35,682
Well, Alicia, "hands-off parenting"
61
00:02:35,783 --> 00:02:37,817
is respecting your kids
enough to let them learn
62
00:02:37,918 --> 00:02:39,619
from their own mistakes.
63
00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:41,688
Which you'd know,
if you actually read the book.
64
00:02:41,789 --> 00:02:43,423
Okay, easy.
65
00:02:43,524 --> 00:02:46,226
Interesting.
Speaking of making mistakes,
66
00:02:46,327 --> 00:02:48,328
wasn't it you who said, and I quote,
67
00:02:48,429 --> 00:02:51,698
"kids who can't eat
nuts should shut the...
68
00:02:51,799 --> 00:02:53,133
bleep up about it?"
69
00:02:53,234 --> 00:02:56,202
- I would never say "bleep."
- You know what I mean.
70
00:02:56,304 --> 00:02:58,004
I don't know, I don't remember.
71
00:02:58,105 --> 00:02:59,939
What I do recall is after
you endlessly talking
72
00:03:00,041 --> 00:03:01,875
about your daughter's nut allergy,
73
00:03:01,976 --> 00:03:03,877
you fed her a ball filled with nuts.
74
00:03:03,978 --> 00:03:05,578
"Crazy balls," was it?
75
00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:07,914
She couldn't even breathe. So maybe...
76
00:03:08,015 --> 00:03:09,449
Anne.
77
00:03:09,550 --> 00:03:12,319
...you should shut the bleep
up about my parenting book!
78
00:03:12,420 --> 00:03:14,054
I thought I lost her.
79
00:03:14,155 --> 00:03:16,556
And we're very sorry about that.
Alicia! Alicia!
80
00:03:16,657 --> 00:03:18,458
Oh, fuck me.
81
00:03:18,559 --> 00:03:21,127
How do you want your eggs? Soft or hard?
82
00:03:21,228 --> 00:03:23,630
You know I like everything hard.
83
00:03:23,731 --> 00:03:25,699
(LAUGHS) Seriously, though.
84
00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:28,101
Soft actually. Almost raw.
85
00:03:28,202 --> 00:03:29,636
Oh, okay.
86
00:03:29,737 --> 00:03:31,705
I hope the house doesn't
feel too quiet for you.
87
00:03:31,806 --> 00:03:33,139
With the boys gone, and all.
88
00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:34,541
Are you kidding?
89
00:03:34,642 --> 00:03:37,944
This is the first day of
the rest of our lives.
90
00:03:38,045 --> 00:03:40,013
(LAUGHS)
91
00:03:40,114 --> 00:03:42,015
JOSEPH: No! Jacob! What are you doing?
92
00:03:42,116 --> 00:03:44,684
- That's the butthole hose!
- Not anymore!
93
00:03:44,785 --> 00:03:46,119
Oh God, they've gone feral.
94
00:03:46,220 --> 00:03:47,954
The drinking hose is in the back,
butthole in the front!
95
00:03:48,055 --> 00:03:49,956
- It's easy!
- It's so far!
96
00:03:51,043 --> 00:03:52,058
Try walking back there
97
00:03:52,059 --> 00:03:54,160
- with a dirty butt! Good luck!
- Um...
98
00:03:54,261 --> 00:03:56,663
maybe you should
check-in with Anne again.
99
00:03:56,764 --> 00:03:58,998
This can't be what she meant by
"set them free."
100
00:03:59,100 --> 00:04:00,467
No.
101
00:04:00,568 --> 00:04:03,815
- Oh, I blew it.
- I mean, you didn't nail it.
102
00:04:03,850 --> 00:04:05,271
I shouldn't have brought up
that thing about her almost
103
00:04:05,373 --> 00:04:07,407
- killing her kid.
- No, you shouldn't have.
104
00:04:07,508 --> 00:04:09,476
Does anyone even listen to
"Mother Knows Breast?"
105
00:04:09,577 --> 00:04:11,277
She's got a couple hundred listeners,
106
00:04:11,379 --> 00:04:13,179
it's basically a Clay Aiken concert.
107
00:04:13,280 --> 00:04:14,914
This was just meant to be a trial run.
108
00:04:15,015 --> 00:04:16,649
- Okay? No harm, no foul.
- Mm-hmm.
109
00:04:16,751 --> 00:04:18,818
I'm just gonna put this out there,
I do need a couple days
110
00:04:18,919 --> 00:04:20,820
to set up your next few appearances.
111
00:04:20,921 --> 00:04:22,288
You can totally chill at my house.
112
00:04:22,884 --> 00:04:25,024
Or, and this is a big or...
113
00:04:25,126 --> 00:04:27,293
you could go see your family.
114
00:04:27,395 --> 00:04:29,195
Uh huh, uh huh. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
115
00:04:29,296 --> 00:04:31,331
And then when you get back,
the next one'll be a cinch.
116
00:04:31,432 --> 00:04:33,299
I mean, no one's
gonna trigger you like Alicia.
117
00:04:33,401 --> 00:04:35,034
This is the kind of woman who journals
118
00:04:35,136 --> 00:04:37,570
about her kid's bowel movements.
(CHUCKLES)
119
00:04:38,706 --> 00:04:40,473
How many times do I have
to kick you guys out?!
120
00:04:40,574 --> 00:04:42,575
- I didn't mean that.
- Leave!
121
00:04:42,676 --> 00:04:44,077
This has been great.
122
00:04:45,413 --> 00:04:47,313
- Poo journals!
- (LAUGHS)
123
00:04:47,415 --> 00:04:49,048
Thank you.
124
00:04:51,385 --> 00:04:52,819
(SIGHS)
125
00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:54,487
(CELL PHONE BUZZES)
126
00:04:55,423 --> 00:04:58,625
Ah. Hey, Sloane!
You calling about Anne's podcast?
127
00:04:58,726 --> 00:05:01,394
It went okay, no headlines.
Well, maybe one headline.
128
00:05:01,495 --> 00:05:03,530
Super. Listen,
Kristen's coming in today,
129
00:05:03,631 --> 00:05:05,298
I'm getting her moving
on Rat Girl for the next
130
00:05:05,399 --> 00:05:07,100
"Penny Pest Control" book.
131
00:05:07,201 --> 00:05:09,636
Oh! Okay, Rat Girl. But um...
132
00:05:09,737 --> 00:05:10,970
but not Rat Girl, right?
133
00:05:11,071 --> 00:05:12,906
Uh, that was just a dumb placeholder,
134
00:05:13,007 --> 00:05:16,132
a silly idea I had on-on the spot,
135
00:05:16,167 --> 00:05:17,343
so the kids wouldn't
revolt at the reading.
136
00:05:17,445 --> 00:05:19,479
I'm sure Kristen would wanna
come up with her own concept.
137
00:05:19,580 --> 00:05:20,914
Are you kidding?
138
00:05:21,015 --> 00:05:23,640
Those kids were drooling at
that filthy little creature.
139
00:05:23,675 --> 00:05:24,684
Really?
140
00:05:24,685 --> 00:05:27,353
Uh, this feels like it doesn't
even make sense, you know,
141
00:05:27,455 --> 00:05:29,189
like, a rat and a girl fused together,
142
00:05:29,290 --> 00:05:30,790
that's impossible.
143
00:05:30,891 --> 00:05:32,625
Yeah, well, kids' stories
aren't supposed to make sense.
144
00:05:32,726 --> 00:05:34,561
Explain that pig family
with English accents.
145
00:05:34,662 --> 00:05:38,231
Or that goddamn "Paw Patrol,"
dogs with jobs, ridiculous.
146
00:05:38,332 --> 00:05:40,600
Rat Girl is gold. Don't overthink it.
147
00:05:40,701 --> 00:05:42,168
- It's just... hello?
- (CELL BEEPS OFF)
148
00:05:45,239 --> 00:05:47,106
Okay. Okay!
149
00:05:49,543 --> 00:05:52,378
- So hey, how ya doin', Frank?
- Actually, great!
150
00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:54,380
I'm a CEO, can you believe it?
151
00:05:54,482 --> 00:05:55,882
Oh. Uh...
152
00:05:55,983 --> 00:05:57,517
I know! I'm training a team today.
153
00:05:57,618 --> 00:05:59,586
- That's great.
- Well, it is a small team,
154
00:05:59,687 --> 00:06:01,221
and they are shadow people,
155
00:06:01,322 --> 00:06:03,022
but I'm pretty sure I can make
'em shine.
156
00:06:03,123 --> 00:06:05,225
- Ah. Hmm!
- So, what's up?
157
00:06:05,326 --> 00:06:07,026
Right, um...
158
00:06:07,127 --> 00:06:09,362
you know those Rat Girl
drawings that Rhoda did?
159
00:06:09,463 --> 00:06:11,531
Aren't they amazing?
160
00:06:11,632 --> 00:06:13,266
Mm-hmm, absolutely, they are. They are.
161
00:06:13,367 --> 00:06:16,236
Um, but they're just like,
silly little drawings, right?
162
00:06:16,337 --> 00:06:18,104
Oh, I don't know if I'd call them silly.
163
00:06:18,205 --> 00:06:19,606
There's some serious artistry there.
164
00:06:19,707 --> 00:06:21,140
Mm-hmm, no, for sure. They are.
165
00:06:21,242 --> 00:06:23,176
But, but it's not like it's her...
(CHUCKLE)
166
00:06:23,277 --> 00:06:25,245
intellectual property, right?
167
00:06:25,346 --> 00:06:28,047
I don't know.
She's been on a real roll lately.
168
00:06:28,148 --> 00:06:29,782
Check it out!
169
00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:33,920
(PROUD EXHALE)
170
00:06:33,921 --> 00:06:36,322
Would you believe all these
pictures tell a story?
171
00:06:36,423 --> 00:06:38,558
A pretty compelling one, too.
172
00:06:38,659 --> 00:06:40,927
You know, I'm starting to think
we gotta double down on this.
173
00:06:41,028 --> 00:06:42,962
Make it into a book,
or get it published,
174
00:06:43,063 --> 00:06:44,898
or something, I don't know.
175
00:06:44,999 --> 00:06:47,433
?
176
00:06:47,535 --> 00:06:49,002
Oh yeah...
177
00:06:49,103 --> 00:06:51,037
SLOANE: This is Sloane,
please leave a message. (BEEP)
178
00:06:51,138 --> 00:06:54,307
Sloane! Uh, I've got some great ideas
179
00:06:54,408 --> 00:06:56,209
for "Penny Pest Control"
that are way better
180
00:06:56,310 --> 00:06:58,011
for the demographic,
so just wait for me, okay?
181
00:06:58,112 --> 00:06:59,279
I'm coming to the meeting with Kristen.
182
00:06:59,374 --> 00:07:02,649
- Okay? So wait for me.
- (INCOMING MESSAGE CHIMES)
183
00:07:03,608 --> 00:07:05,852
- _
- What the fuck?!
184
00:07:07,054 --> 00:07:10,490
?
185
00:07:10,591 --> 00:07:12,091
- Mom?!
- Oh!
186
00:07:14,895 --> 00:07:17,263
? Here comes the bride ?
187
00:07:17,364 --> 00:07:18,698
I'm so proud of you, Dad.
188
00:07:18,799 --> 00:07:20,533
And I'm finally getting a sister!
189
00:07:20,634 --> 00:07:22,635
- Yeah. Keep it together, son.
- Mm-hmm! (SNIFFLING)
190
00:07:22,736 --> 00:07:24,771
- You can't be serious.
- I am serious.
191
00:07:24,872 --> 00:07:27,140
And if you must know,
Barry and I are trying.
192
00:07:27,241 --> 00:07:29,943
- Trying what?
- To conceive, of course.
193
00:07:30,852 --> 00:07:33,246
You can't conceive, Mom, you're too old!
194
00:07:33,347 --> 00:07:36,583
I said we're trying, not succeeding.
195
00:07:36,684 --> 00:07:39,452
Trying is so much more fun! Ha!
196
00:07:39,553 --> 00:07:41,254
Jesus, Mom!
197
00:07:41,355 --> 00:07:43,523
Anyway,
your father didn't leave us much money,
198
00:07:43,624 --> 00:07:46,593
and frankly, this youthful
glow does not pay for itself.
199
00:07:46,694 --> 00:07:48,061
The coffers are empty, Sweetie.
200
00:07:48,162 --> 00:07:51,397
So either I am Barry's problem...
201
00:07:51,498 --> 00:07:53,199
- Stop doing that!
- or I'm yours.
202
00:07:53,300 --> 00:07:58,972
?
203
00:08:01,375 --> 00:08:03,109
Let's get this wedding started,
shall we?
204
00:08:08,349 --> 00:08:09,882
Whoa. Cool.
205
00:08:09,984 --> 00:08:11,051
- You wanna try?
- Do you want dinner?!
206
00:08:11,136 --> 00:08:13,219
Thank you for coming. As you can see,
207
00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:15,688
your "set them free"
advice didn't really work.
208
00:08:15,789 --> 00:08:17,724
Well, I, I didn't tell you
to kick them out,
209
00:08:17,825 --> 00:08:19,692
I, you know, haven't you ever heard,
"teach a man to fish?"
210
00:08:19,793 --> 00:08:21,728
Why would I teach a man to fish?
211
00:08:21,829 --> 00:08:24,330
It means give them tools.
212
00:08:24,431 --> 00:08:26,132
Well, why didn't you say that?
213
00:08:26,233 --> 00:08:28,001
(BOYS SCREAM AND GRUNT)
214
00:08:28,102 --> 00:08:29,869
Argh!
215
00:08:29,970 --> 00:08:31,571
Have you tried talking to them?
216
00:08:31,672 --> 00:08:34,507
They won't talk to me.
But maybe they'd talk...
217
00:08:34,608 --> 00:08:36,009
- to you?
- Hmm?
218
00:08:36,110 --> 00:08:38,177
Aren't the mentally
deranged kinda your thing?
219
00:08:39,264 --> 00:08:41,180
Yeah... they sure are.
220
00:08:41,281 --> 00:08:43,883
?
221
00:08:45,219 --> 00:08:47,887
All right, boys.
Can we talk about the shanty town?
222
00:08:47,988 --> 00:08:49,856
What's going on out there?
223
00:08:52,793 --> 00:08:54,994
Nothing to say? That's okay.
224
00:08:57,798 --> 00:08:59,632
(CLEARS THROAT)
225
00:09:00,934 --> 00:09:03,803
You know, when I was a kid,
my Dad left, too.
226
00:09:03,904 --> 00:09:06,139
I woke up one morning and
it was just my Mom and me,
227
00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:08,041
and I had to grow up fast.
228
00:09:09,443 --> 00:09:11,144
And I was angry.
229
00:09:11,245 --> 00:09:14,547
And that anger was really useful,
until it wasn't.
230
00:09:14,648 --> 00:09:17,750
And I had to see a lot of therapists.
231
00:09:17,851 --> 00:09:19,686
So how about I just spare
you the time and money,
232
00:09:19,787 --> 00:09:21,554
and tell you what I wish
someone would've told me
233
00:09:21,655 --> 00:09:23,589
back then...
234
00:09:23,691 --> 00:09:25,491
You're only given so many opportunities
235
00:09:25,592 --> 00:09:27,493
to define who you are, and this...
236
00:09:27,594 --> 00:09:29,328
feels like one of them.
237
00:09:31,699 --> 00:09:33,032
What?
238
00:09:33,133 --> 00:09:35,234
(SIGHS) Your Dad left and
now you're both assholes.
239
00:09:35,335 --> 00:09:36,869
- Ohhhh!
- Totally.
240
00:09:36,970 --> 00:09:39,839
- Totally. Yeah.
- But you don't have to be.
241
00:09:39,940 --> 00:09:42,141
You can decide what kind
of men you want to be.
242
00:09:42,242 --> 00:09:43,776
And you don't have to do it on your own.
243
00:09:43,877 --> 00:09:45,745
You could think of somebody you admire,
244
00:09:45,846 --> 00:09:48,014
and ask them for guidance.
245
00:09:49,016 --> 00:09:51,818
That's-that's really powerful.
246
00:09:51,919 --> 00:09:53,820
That hit me.
247
00:09:54,822 --> 00:10:00,159
?
248
00:10:01,228 --> 00:10:03,563
- (DOOR CREAKS OPEN)
- Ah!
249
00:10:03,664 --> 00:10:05,398
Now, you may not know it
by looking around,
250
00:10:05,499 --> 00:10:07,900
but there is a story inside these walls,
251
00:10:08,001 --> 00:10:10,436
and it's our job to tell it.
252
00:10:10,537 --> 00:10:13,499
To bring these walls to life!
253
00:10:13,907 --> 00:10:16,109
Here, take this sink, for example.
254
00:10:16,210 --> 00:10:18,111
What does it say to you?
255
00:10:20,848 --> 00:10:22,849
- "Hello."
- No.
256
00:10:22,950 --> 00:10:25,017
BRODY: Well,
to me it says that the builders
257
00:10:25,119 --> 00:10:27,620
really cheaped-out on
the goddamn fixtures!
258
00:10:28,561 --> 00:10:30,289
Fair. Yep, fair.
259
00:10:30,390 --> 00:10:33,126
And I love how explosive you are, Brody.
260
00:10:33,227 --> 00:10:34,994
I would just like to channel it
261
00:10:35,095 --> 00:10:37,890
into something a little
bit more positive.
262
00:10:37,925 --> 00:10:40,536
It's true,
that sink may not be top quality,
263
00:10:40,571 --> 00:10:41,934
but it's...
264
00:10:42,035 --> 00:10:46,550
washing hands after
cutting fresh flowers.
265
00:10:46,673 --> 00:10:48,830
That dining room table is...
266
00:10:48,865 --> 00:10:50,943
Sunday night spaghetti dinners.
267
00:10:51,044 --> 00:10:53,479
These windows are portals to the world.
268
00:10:53,580 --> 00:10:54,914
See what I'm gettin' at?
269
00:10:55,015 --> 00:10:56,816
I don't-I don't think
I can sell like that.
270
00:10:56,917 --> 00:10:58,951
Oh, of course you can! You all can.
271
00:10:59,052 --> 00:11:02,088
It's inside you!
You just need to let it out!
272
00:11:03,123 --> 00:11:05,124
Yes! Coyne Realty, baby!
273
00:11:05,225 --> 00:11:07,059
Let's go! Ha ha!
274
00:11:10,330 --> 00:11:11,831
(CLAPS HANDS)
275
00:11:11,932 --> 00:11:13,266
Selling some units.
276
00:11:13,367 --> 00:11:15,168
BRODY: Welcome to your new home, man!
277
00:11:15,269 --> 00:11:16,903
What do you think?
278
00:11:17,004 --> 00:11:19,605
This is the best part.
They're portals to the world.
279
00:11:19,706 --> 00:11:20,907
They're beautiful!
280
00:11:23,677 --> 00:11:25,878
These are solid now. They're strong.
281
00:11:27,347 --> 00:11:29,916
And we have... cookies in the oven.
282
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:33,119
Mmmm!
283
00:11:33,220 --> 00:11:35,188
- Oh God, sorry, it's hot.
- Oh!
284
00:11:35,289 --> 00:11:37,223
You can almost picture living here,
it's great.
285
00:11:37,324 --> 00:11:38,891
(LOW HUM OF CHATTER)
286
00:11:39,026 --> 00:11:40,126
_
287
00:11:40,127 --> 00:11:42,028
Yes!
288
00:11:42,129 --> 00:11:44,063
Look at this view!
289
00:11:44,164 --> 00:11:46,532
Ah! Isn't it beautiful?
290
00:11:46,633 --> 00:11:48,634
And these windows are super strong.
291
00:11:48,735 --> 00:11:50,670
Unh! See what I mean?
292
00:11:52,206 --> 00:11:54,574
(THUMPS) Ah!
293
00:11:54,675 --> 00:11:57,310
- Oh! Like ghost.
- (LAUGHS)
294
00:11:57,411 --> 00:11:58,811
Ah!
295
00:11:58,912 --> 00:12:00,479
(GASPS)
296
00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:01,480
_
297
00:12:01,548 --> 00:12:03,950
I'm so fired up right now! Woo!
298
00:12:04,051 --> 00:12:05,585
It's um...
299
00:12:05,686 --> 00:12:07,854
I'm telling you, it's impenetrable.
300
00:12:07,955 --> 00:12:10,122
Look, just look.
301
00:12:10,224 --> 00:12:11,991
Woo! (SMASHING)
302
00:12:12,092 --> 00:12:14,126
- Aaaaaaaaah!
- Aah! Aah!
303
00:12:14,228 --> 00:12:16,429
(SCREAMING, GASPS)
304
00:12:16,530 --> 00:12:17,830
- (SCREAMS, SOBS)
- (CAR HONKING BELOW)
305
00:12:17,931 --> 00:12:19,932
Oh! (GASPS)
306
00:12:21,235 --> 00:12:22,835
Oh.
307
00:12:22,936 --> 00:12:24,937
(PATRONS CHATTER)
308
00:12:25,038 --> 00:12:27,640
- (CELL PHONE BUZZES)
- Oh, fuckin' yum!
309
00:12:27,741 --> 00:12:30,443
(CELL PHONE BUZZES)
310
00:12:32,846 --> 00:12:35,081
This isn't another
silent treatment call, is it?
311
00:12:35,182 --> 00:12:37,216
No, this is a vocal call
from your husband
312
00:12:37,317 --> 00:12:39,852
checking in about that
return flight home.
313
00:12:39,953 --> 00:12:42,255
Oh, uh, I um...
314
00:12:42,356 --> 00:12:44,457
You did book a return flight home?
315
00:12:44,558 --> 00:12:46,492
- I'm sorry.
- Anne!
316
00:12:46,593 --> 00:12:48,327
I wanted to, I did!
317
00:12:49,596 --> 00:12:51,430
Kate is working me like a dog.
318
00:12:51,531 --> 00:12:53,499
I am slammed with appearances.
319
00:12:53,600 --> 00:12:55,301
Like, every day for the next week.
320
00:12:56,583 --> 00:12:58,037
It's basically like a full-time job.
321
00:12:58,138 --> 00:12:59,705
Okay, yeah, speaking of full-time jobs,
322
00:12:59,806 --> 00:13:02,808
I stuck my neck out
to get you yours here!
323
00:13:03,810 --> 00:13:06,279
I know, and I'm sorry.
324
00:13:06,380 --> 00:13:08,414
Yeah, I just,
I have to do this dumb press tour.
325
00:13:11,051 --> 00:13:13,019
- Lionel?
- I'm stewing.
326
00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:15,121
And that, and that is totally fair.
327
00:13:15,222 --> 00:13:17,189
But do you think that
you can handle things
328
00:13:17,291 --> 00:13:19,125
on the home front?
Just a little bit longer?
329
00:13:19,852 --> 00:13:21,260
- Yeah. Fine.
- (PHONE BEEPS)
330
00:13:22,939 --> 00:13:24,563
Hey, I gotta go, that's Alice's school.
331
00:13:24,665 --> 00:13:26,299
Okay, I owe you so much.
332
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:28,000
Yeah. Yeah, you do.
333
00:13:28,101 --> 00:13:30,069
(CAR HORN HONKS)
334
00:13:30,170 --> 00:13:32,271
(RELAXED EXHALE)
335
00:13:33,273 --> 00:13:35,308
And as you can see,
336
00:13:35,409 --> 00:13:37,443
Alice and Bennett left quite a mark
337
00:13:37,544 --> 00:13:39,211
on Mr. Neidermeyer's classroom.
338
00:13:39,313 --> 00:13:41,113
Alice, why?
339
00:13:42,115 --> 00:13:44,183
It was to stop the spread of lies.
340
00:13:44,993 --> 00:13:47,420
What?! Global warming propaganda!
341
00:13:47,521 --> 00:13:48,988
Hello!
342
00:13:49,089 --> 00:13:51,691
I'm, I'm sorry, are you...
Is he actual...
343
00:13:51,792 --> 00:13:53,960
Uh, am I the only one
that just heard that?
344
00:13:54,061 --> 00:13:57,296
This incident is
obviously Alice's doing.
345
00:13:57,397 --> 00:13:59,732
Not only is my son a straight-A student,
346
00:13:59,833 --> 00:14:01,734
he is the president
347
00:14:01,835 --> 00:14:03,836
of the Cochrane Conservative Committee.
348
00:14:03,937 --> 00:14:06,539
Conservative Committee?
Are you suggesting that...
349
00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:09,308
you don't believe in climate change?
350
00:14:09,409 --> 00:14:12,311
Is that what you're saying?
Am I going crazy right now?
351
00:14:12,412 --> 00:14:13,713
I don't know!
352
00:14:13,814 --> 00:14:16,632
If I had a wife like yours,
I'd certainly lose my mind.
353
00:14:16,667 --> 00:14:18,718
Hey! Watch your mouth, bracelets.
354
00:14:18,819 --> 00:14:20,686
You know, the things that Bennett says
355
00:14:20,787 --> 00:14:22,588
actually make a lot of sense, Dad.
356
00:14:22,689 --> 00:14:26,609
Do they? Do the things he
says make a lot of sense?
357
00:14:26,644 --> 00:14:27,660
- Yeah.
- Mm-hmm?
358
00:14:27,661 --> 00:14:28,961
Like, what things? Like the uh...
359
00:14:29,062 --> 00:14:32,098
like the not believing
in science stuff?!
360
00:14:32,199 --> 00:14:33,799
Why are your eyes so wide?
361
00:14:33,900 --> 00:14:36,002
Have you heard nothing
about the bees, Alice?
362
00:14:36,103 --> 00:14:38,437
- The bees!
- Needless to say,
363
00:14:38,538 --> 00:14:40,840
they are both suspended for two weeks.
364
00:14:40,941 --> 00:14:42,641
(SIGHS)
365
00:14:42,743 --> 00:14:44,443
I thought you were cool, man!
366
00:14:45,445 --> 00:14:47,246
That was stupid, huh?
367
00:14:47,347 --> 00:14:49,882
They're just so brainwashed.
368
00:14:49,983 --> 00:14:51,884
Look, Alice...
369
00:14:51,985 --> 00:14:54,687
- I like you a lot.
- I like you a lot, too.
370
00:14:54,788 --> 00:14:57,223
But I don't like who I am with you.
371
00:14:58,685 --> 00:15:00,433
- What?
- I don't know, I...
372
00:15:00,468 --> 00:15:03,596
I guess I just prefer my women
a little less complicated.
373
00:15:03,697 --> 00:15:05,031
- (HORN HONKS)
- Alice, get in here,
374
00:15:05,132 --> 00:15:07,700
before that boy convinces
you that the Earth is flat!
375
00:15:07,801 --> 00:15:10,202
Well, actually,
there's a lot of evidence to suggest...
376
00:15:10,303 --> 00:15:12,004
Bennett! Stop talking.
377
00:15:16,576 --> 00:15:18,444
I should probably take this back.
378
00:15:20,814 --> 00:15:22,982
Come on, Anne, where are you?
379
00:15:23,083 --> 00:15:25,351
- ALICE: But wait...
- BENNETT: Just stop.
380
00:15:25,452 --> 00:15:26,919
(CELL PHONE RINGS)
381
00:15:27,020 --> 00:15:28,954
ANNE: You've reached Anne,
leave a message.
382
00:15:29,056 --> 00:15:33,025
?
383
00:15:34,194 --> 00:15:35,995
Ah! The love making!
384
00:15:36,096 --> 00:15:37,997
Oh my God, the love making.
385
00:15:38,098 --> 00:15:39,965
This is it. This is my Vietnam.
386
00:15:40,067 --> 00:15:42,134
Oh, women of a certain age
387
00:15:42,235 --> 00:15:44,804
are no longer seen as sexual beings.
388
00:15:44,905 --> 00:15:47,139
We're like neutered ghosts,
389
00:15:47,240 --> 00:15:49,675
just waiting for the
sweet release of death.
390
00:15:49,776 --> 00:15:51,210
Mm!
391
00:15:51,311 --> 00:15:54,113
So I thank you, Barry,
for challenging that norm.
392
00:15:55,315 --> 00:15:57,116
You've stirred my heart,
393
00:15:58,251 --> 00:15:59,718
and my loins.
394
00:15:59,820 --> 00:16:01,954
- Very cool, guys!
- Shut up, Adam!
395
00:16:02,055 --> 00:16:04,056
- Jesus.
- (PHONE VIBRATES)
396
00:16:05,307 --> 00:16:07,357
_
397
00:16:07,494 --> 00:16:10,434
OFFICIANT:
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
398
00:16:11,865 --> 00:16:13,699
(GIGGLES)
399
00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:16,201
- (GLASS SHATTERS)
- Mazel tov, guys! Buh-bye!
400
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:18,425
- Bring it in, sis!
- Get away from me, man!
401
00:16:18,460 --> 00:16:19,505
Oh!
402
00:16:20,807 --> 00:16:22,274
Is she here? Is Kristen here?!
403
00:16:22,375 --> 00:16:24,577
- Long gone.
- Dammit.
404
00:16:24,678 --> 00:16:25,744
It was a great meeting, though.
405
00:16:25,846 --> 00:16:27,046
Yeah?
406
00:16:27,147 --> 00:16:29,148
She was truly inspired by Rat Girl.
407
00:16:29,249 --> 00:16:30,983
I bet she's already
popped some melatonin,
408
00:16:31,084 --> 00:16:33,018
- and brainstormed half the book.
- Shit.
409
00:16:33,120 --> 00:16:34,820
You were right about
"Penny Pest Control."
410
00:16:34,921 --> 00:16:37,323
This franchise is gonna be huge.
411
00:16:37,424 --> 00:16:39,191
Yeah, no, no, of course, yeah, yeah,
412
00:16:39,292 --> 00:16:41,427
with all the villains,
endless possibilities.
413
00:16:41,528 --> 00:16:43,429
I was thinking though that
Rat Girl might be a little
414
00:16:43,530 --> 00:16:45,331
too scary for children, you know?
415
00:16:46,036 --> 00:16:48,659
I mean, know Charlie would
crap himself at the idea
416
00:16:48,694 --> 00:16:50,002
of a rat fused with a girl.
417
00:16:50,103 --> 00:16:52,204
I mean, that is terrifying stuff.
418
00:16:52,305 --> 00:16:55,441
But uh, a lizard lawyer,
419
00:16:55,476 --> 00:16:57,676
oh boy, that's a bad guy.
420
00:16:57,777 --> 00:16:59,778
That's an exciting bad guy.
421
00:17:01,781 --> 00:17:03,749
And there's lots of others,
you know, like a...
422
00:17:03,850 --> 00:17:05,885
possum politician, bad guy there,
423
00:17:05,986 --> 00:17:07,887
that's a bad guy,
you don't wanna mess with him.
424
00:17:07,988 --> 00:17:09,688
Bet he sways right. (LAUGHS)
425
00:17:09,789 --> 00:17:11,690
Right into a hole!
426
00:17:11,791 --> 00:17:13,926
Where his lunch is.
427
00:17:14,027 --> 00:17:16,262
- You done?
- Yeah.
428
00:17:16,363 --> 00:17:18,264
For God's sake, take the yes.
429
00:17:18,365 --> 00:17:20,266
I hope we don't have a problem here.
430
00:17:20,367 --> 00:17:21,734
Because I've already spoken
to the art department,
431
00:17:21,835 --> 00:17:23,702
and they're coming up
with preliminary sketches
432
00:17:23,803 --> 00:17:25,704
- of Rat Girl as we speak.
- Yeah, no, no problem.
433
00:17:25,805 --> 00:17:27,806
- No problem.
- That's what I thought.
434
00:17:27,908 --> 00:17:30,959
Thank you, thank you.
I will uh, speak soon.
435
00:17:30,994 --> 00:17:33,228
Exiting, exciting.
436
00:17:33,263 --> 00:17:34,480
Bed Bug Boy, not that sounds...
437
00:17:34,581 --> 00:17:36,148
Take the yes, Kate!
438
00:17:36,249 --> 00:17:39,351
(CHUCKLES) Okay. Okay. Okay.
439
00:17:42,237 --> 00:17:44,572
- So uh... I know, I know.
- (SCREAMS)
440
00:17:44,673 --> 00:17:47,308
Alright guys, go play,
because Mommy's gonna need
441
00:17:47,409 --> 00:17:49,109
five minutes to herself,
how's that sound?
442
00:17:49,211 --> 00:17:51,445
- MAYA: Hey!
- Hey!
443
00:17:52,647 --> 00:17:54,081
- Run! Run! Run! Run! Run!
- Hi, Axe.
444
00:17:54,182 --> 00:17:56,083
MAYA: Have fun with Charlie!
445
00:17:56,184 --> 00:17:58,085
He's been talking about
this playdate all week.
446
00:17:58,836 --> 00:18:00,454
Playdate. Right.
447
00:18:01,415 --> 00:18:02,923
You totally forgot, didn't you?
448
00:18:03,024 --> 00:18:06,040
No, I did not forgot, I did not forgot.
449
00:18:06,461 --> 00:18:08,128
Hey, you wanna get after some wine?
450
00:18:08,230 --> 00:18:10,364
- Yes! Yes!
- Yeah, let's pound some wine.
451
00:18:10,465 --> 00:18:12,099
I gotta talk to you about something,
come here.
452
00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:14,101
(FOOTSTEPS THUD)
453
00:18:14,202 --> 00:18:16,637
- Cheers!
- Ah, yes!
454
00:18:17,906 --> 00:18:20,274
Mm! Tell me. As an artist,
455
00:18:20,375 --> 00:18:22,343
does anyone really own art?
456
00:18:22,444 --> 00:18:24,879
- That's a loaded question.
- Okay.
457
00:18:24,980 --> 00:18:26,680
You really want to get into this?
458
00:18:26,781 --> 00:18:29,350
- Give me the Coles Notes.
- Give me the context?
459
00:18:29,451 --> 00:18:32,486
Ah, let's say a kid draws something,
460
00:18:32,587 --> 00:18:35,623
and then like,
a proper artist refines it.
461
00:18:35,724 --> 00:18:37,491
Legally, who's the wiser?
462
00:18:37,592 --> 00:18:41,161
Well, I think all art is borrowed.
463
00:18:41,263 --> 00:18:43,430
We're just passing ideas back and forth.
464
00:18:43,532 --> 00:18:45,766
- It's the execution that counts.
- Exactly!
465
00:18:45,867 --> 00:18:48,569
Kids are idiots.
They can't execute a thing.
466
00:18:48,670 --> 00:18:50,404
- Thank you.
- (LAUGHS)
467
00:18:51,606 --> 00:18:53,040
Speaking of, where are our idiots?
468
00:18:54,442 --> 00:18:55,976
Look like they're having
a little penis party!
469
00:18:56,077 --> 00:18:57,878
(LAUGHS) He's obsessed!
470
00:18:57,979 --> 00:19:00,447
No, Charlie's obsessed.
Always with the sword fights.
471
00:19:01,449 --> 00:19:03,317
At least we're in this together.
472
00:19:03,418 --> 00:19:05,419
Ah!
473
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,655
Axe's is different.
474
00:19:07,756 --> 00:19:10,424
- Different? Ohhh!
- Oh.
475
00:19:10,525 --> 00:19:12,560
Okay, um, Charlie...
476
00:19:13,562 --> 00:19:15,996
so you and Axe are not different.
477
00:19:16,097 --> 00:19:18,699
- Yes, you are.
- Yes, you are, and it's fine.
478
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,135
- I'm just gonna take over.
- Appreciate it.
479
00:19:21,236 --> 00:19:23,771
You're different, but not better.
480
00:19:23,872 --> 00:19:27,374
We honour and respect the
ways that we're different.
481
00:19:27,475 --> 00:19:30,311
Fuck that was good, yes,
yes, yes, yes, yes!
482
00:19:30,412 --> 00:19:33,547
- Axe's has a hat.
- A hat?
483
00:19:34,583 --> 00:19:37,551
Ohhh! He means uncircumcised.
484
00:19:37,652 --> 00:19:38,886
This one's all you.
485
00:19:38,987 --> 00:19:40,721
- Yeah, we're in Jewish waters now.
- Hmm.
486
00:19:40,822 --> 00:19:42,590
Okay, so Charlie, uh,
487
00:19:42,691 --> 00:19:44,858
Jewish boys don't have hats.
488
00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:46,393
But don't be sad, uh...
489
00:19:46,494 --> 00:19:48,128
it's because um, it's because...
490
00:19:48,229 --> 00:19:50,097
you're one of the chosen people, huh?
491
00:19:50,198 --> 00:19:52,266
- Chosen by God.
- Whoa! Whoa!
492
00:19:52,367 --> 00:19:54,501
Hey, you're chosen too, Axe.
493
00:19:54,603 --> 00:19:56,570
Yours has "a hat"
because we don't believe
494
00:19:56,671 --> 00:19:58,372
in genital mutilation.
495
00:19:58,473 --> 00:20:00,174
Okay, ouch.
496
00:20:00,275 --> 00:20:01,942
Whoa!
497
00:20:02,043 --> 00:20:05,646
We honour and respect the ways
in which we are different.
498
00:20:05,747 --> 00:20:07,281
- Hmm.
- But, you know,
499
00:20:07,382 --> 00:20:09,683
no hat, easier to clean.
500
00:20:12,854 --> 00:20:14,622
- Seriously?
- Well.
501
00:20:15,624 --> 00:20:16,757
Do you wanna go inside
502
00:20:16,858 --> 00:20:18,225
- and have more wine?
- Yes!
503
00:20:18,326 --> 00:20:19,493
Pull your pants up when you're done!
504
00:20:19,594 --> 00:20:20,894
(MAYA LAUGHS)
505
00:20:20,996 --> 00:20:26,634
?
506
00:20:26,735 --> 00:20:28,035
This is legit, dude.
507
00:20:28,136 --> 00:20:29,770
You think we skipped
a couple steps here?
508
00:20:30,543 --> 00:20:33,057
I know we agreed to do a
couple smaller gigs first,
509
00:20:33,092 --> 00:20:35,142
but that was before I realized
that Sloane had a contact here,
510
00:20:35,243 --> 00:20:36,810
and we could pull some strings.
511
00:20:36,911 --> 00:20:39,279
So be a pro,
and knock it out of the fuckin' park!
512
00:20:39,381 --> 00:20:41,415
- Jesus, dude, no pressure.
- Come on, you've got this.
513
00:20:41,516 --> 00:20:43,384
It's gonna be a bunch
of softball questions.
514
00:20:43,485 --> 00:20:45,285
You see the host?
She's wearing a broach.
515
00:20:45,387 --> 00:20:47,855
- Look at that thing!
- Yeah, it's a nice broach.
516
00:20:47,956 --> 00:20:49,823
It's a hell of a broach,
that's not the point.
517
00:20:49,924 --> 00:20:52,359
You can do this, okay?
Just have fun, trust me.
518
00:20:52,460 --> 00:20:53,994
- Okay.
- Yeah.
519
00:20:54,095 --> 00:20:55,729
ALICIA: Sorry, where do I sit?
520
00:20:55,830 --> 00:20:58,792
Oh! Hi!
521
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:01,335
I watch this show every day,
and now I'm a guest on it!
522
00:21:01,436 --> 00:21:02,770
Can you believe it?
523
00:21:02,871 --> 00:21:05,205
DIRECTOR: Okay, ten minutes, everyone!
524
00:21:05,306 --> 00:21:07,207
- What the fuck?
- Oh shit.
525
00:21:08,276 --> 00:21:13,747
?37814
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
