All language subtitles for Mad Men - 06x01 - The Doorway, Part 1.PROPER EVOLVE.English.C.updated.Addic7ed.com

Previously on Mad Men...

When we land Jaguar,
the world will know.

Herb Rennet has demanded
to spend a night with Joan.

This is some very
dirty business.

I wanted to tell you
it's not worth it.

Tell them I want a partnership.
Not silent.

I want all the partners here.

First thing tomorrow morning we're going
to find you an apartment in the city.

- I need you right now.
- Megan...

It's the only thing
I'm good for.

I think she just...
needed her mother.

I'm tired of trying to prove
I still have a value around here.

It's what happens when
you help someone...

they succeed and move on.

Don't you want them to?

Miss Calvet, could you
step in, please?

You know I love you.

Are you alone?

Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com

That's it.

- That's it, hang in there.
- Oh, my God!

Oh, my God.

"Midway in our life's journey,

I went astray
from the straight road

and woke to find myself alone

in a dark wood."

Mmm.

Mahalo.

It's still suite 282.

How long has it been?

Can't get too suntanned,
they'll fire me.

Oh, you must have
gotten it wet.

Let me see.

You know what?
Who cares what time it is?

You would not have liked that.

You wouldn't have
liked it at all.

I had to walk down the beach
away from the crowds

to this surf shop and knock
on a door with a closed sign.

It was so seedy down there.

Plus, I had to get
my money from here.

Come on.

I know you've tried it,
but you haven't had sex high.

It makes it so much
more intense.

Everything you see on your
plate is what you would find

in a royal Hawaiian feast.

That purple pudding is poi.

It's strange, but satisfying.

And we Hawaiians
say that it's ono,

which means tasty.

But you might just say,
"Ono, I'm not eating that."

This is real Hawaiian food.

Even the macaroni salad.

But, of course,
at the Royal Hawaiian,

we try to treat
every guest like they're--

Well, everything
is better here.

I'm sure it is.

It must take a lot of work
to stand out in paradise.

Don, you have to try this.

Oh, don't bother.
It's wallpaper paste.

Just eat the pig.

Now, while you stay
with us at the lovely,

beautiful Royal Hawaiian,

make sure you see
enchanted Diamond Head

and all of the natural
wonders of the island

by bus or by boat.

It's easy if you book

one of our guided tours
in the lobby.

Aloha.

Come. Come dance.

I've got nothing
to do with this.

Go ahead, Don.

Leave him alone, honey.

I want to do it.

No, you have to
do it like this.

You have to relax.

Get in the spirit
of the islands.

They call me
the Hawaiian Elvis.

Gentlemen, I remind you,

this is my job.

Stop laughing or I'll make
them come back for you.

Excuse me, Corinne.
I hate to bother you.

I mean, I know
your name's not Corinne.

No, It's Megan Calvet.

- Oh, my goodness. I'm really
bothering you. - No, not at all.

You're so much trimmer than you are on TV.
Do people tell you that?

- I-- no.
- "To Have and to Hold" is my favorite.

I mean, I watch a few, and
you're obviously on vacation.

- It's okay. - Well, I know you're
new to "Berkshire Falls,"

but I can tell you--
you just have a way.

Thank you so much.

Would you mind signing
an autograph to my niece?

She's a bigger fan than I am.

I'd be delighted.

- What's her name?
- Karen.

It's like Corinne.

I can't believe
Victor won't acknowledge you.

Well, we'll see what happens.

Enjoy your stay.

Those women really knew me.

One of them was from Minnesota.

I didn't even know
they had the show there.

I love it here.

Hey, Galloway,
you want another?

Can I get a tall beer?
Chop chop.

So, mister,
has he moved at all?

Well, you're either dead
or you've got great balance.

Hey, were you in the service?

I got the same one.

- What branch?
- Army.

You can say that again.

- Korea?
- Briefly.

Was Korea like this?

'Cause I'll tell you, they
offer you R&R in Honolulu

and you think, "Did anybody
notice it's the same place?"

But I'm glad to be here,
I can tell you that.

You on your anniversary?

Folks have been
pretty friendly.

After all the shit that went
on last summer Stateside,

I was looking for a fight.

That'd be classy-- showing
up with a black eye.

This is my bachelor party.

I'm getting married tomorrow.

Congratulations.
Let me buy you a drink.

Nah, I got a shitload
of combat pay.

Let me buy you one.

You some kind of astronaut?

I'm in advertising.

We got this .50 caliber
machine gun.

The M2.

You should see what it does
to a water buffalo.

Oh, my Lord. I could
paint this place red.

How long do you have left?

Ceremony's at 0800.

Four hours or so.

No, in Vietnam.

Eight months.

Someone told her
married guys live longer

'cause they got
something to live for.

She's from San Diego.

She's Mexican.

She met me halfway in Hawaii.

I met her halfway
by getting married.

Were you married
when you were in Korea?

No.

And you made it.

Listen, Lieutenant.

What do you say
we get into some trouble?

It's PFC Dinkins, by the way.

It's usually
printed right there.

Don.

So how do you feel
about giving away the bride?

You don't think your
friend's gonna make it?

Nah, he's my best man.

Her family's in San Ysidro.

And I don't want some hotel
employee being her dad.

They look just like the enemy.

Am I wrong?

There's plenty of GIs here.
There's no one else you know?

Who gave your bride away?

I'd love to help you out,
but you don't even know me.

I think you'd regret it later.

I believe in what
goes around comes around.

One day I'm gonna be
a veteran in paradise.

One day I'll be the man
who can't sleep

and talks to strangers.

I, James, take you, Connie,
for my lawful wife,

to have and to hold
from this day forward.

For better or for worse,
for richer or for poorer,

in sickness and in health,

until death do us part.

What were you doing wrong?

I'm so sorry, Officer.
It's very hard to see.

That's why you
have to drive slower.

We go easy on the speed limit
here, but not with this ice.

I promise I will do that
in the future.

I'm afraid this is about
what you already did.

You may not be aware,
but this is Betty Francis.

You may know her husband,
my son, Henry Francis.

He works in the mayor's office in Manhattan.
Mayor Lindsay.

I work for New York State.
We've got our own mayor.

I'll do without
your sarcasm, young man.

Now, if you don't mind,

I think all concerned
will be very content

if you issue a stern warning
and let us be on our way.

Pauline.

I'm trying to avoid taking you
off the road with a shovel.

She's driving like a maniac.

Yell at her.

I hate cops.

Nonsense. They're just
doing their job.

Well, they're too enthusiastic.

That ruined it.
That ruined everything.

I can't imagine it getting
any darker than this.

My mom's dead.

How was "The Nutcracker"?

- The highlight of the evening.
- Magical as always.

Well, Bobby, Gene, and I
are sorry we missed it.

Nothing like the ballet,
right, boys?

Is Sandy sleeping over?

What do you care?

Isn't somebody
going to say something?

Betty got a ticket.

For what?

I thought it was
going to be speeding,

but apparently
it's reckless driving.

I want you to tell your wife

that invoking your name in an
interaction with a state trooper

is nothing to be ashamed of.

Ma, it barely works for me.

Then Grandma Pauline
yelled at him.

- I did nothing of the sort.
- What did he do?

- He was verbally abusive.
- Give him the ticket.

He'll fix it.
He does it for everyone.

Ma, you know how I fix
those tickets?

I pay 'em.

- Can I open it?
- Mm-hmm.

Get away, you little weirdo.

I like the case.
It looks like a coffin.

Would you play a little?
That'd be nice.

I don't know.

Please. It makes
me feel so much.

This is disgusting.
Don't let them force you.

Have you been playing long?

- She's going to Juilliard next semester.
- Juilliard?

Why didn't you tell me we were
in the presence of a prodigy?

15 is not a prodigy.

Sorry about that.
Checking the steam.

- How was your trip?
- Wonderful.

Warm.
I did not miss this.

How are you feeling?

Let me in there.

It's okay, Jonesy.

- Jesus, what's his real name?
- I don't know.

Open his coat.
Open his coat.

Sylvia, call an ambulance.

There's a phone at the desk.

Okay, Jonesy,
keep listening to me.

Come on,
I know you can hear me.

Come on.

Let me get those.

- Absolutely not.
- I'm surprised you're back at work.

Oh, the missus couldn't wait
to get me out of the house.

- I don't believe it.
- Oh, wait.

Messenger came with
your script yesterday.

I didn't let it
out of my sight.

I got you a pretty nice
bottle for Christmas

in case you can't
read the handwriting.

Well, I hope you got
Dr. Rosen a case.

I thought you were going to
stop reading that before bed.

It's not bothering me tonight.

I bet it isn't.

You're so calm
from all that violin.

She plays beautifully.

You and Bobby had the same look on
your face when she was playing.

She's a year older than Sally.
Shame on you.

No one would blame me for leaving
you for a teenage musician.

She's just in the next room.

Why don't you go in there
and rape her?

- I'll hold her arms down.
- Betty, what the hell?

You said you wanted
to spice things up.

Will it ruin it if I'm there?

You know what? If you want
to be alone with her,

I'll put on my housecoat
and take Sally for a ride.

You can stick a rag in her mouth
and you won't wake the boys.

All right.
All right, Betty.

My goodness.
You're blushing.

She left the sliding door open.

There's dirt all over the rug.

Maybe she wanted
to air out the place.

I'm gonna take the cleaning
out of her Christmas present.

One scene.

I take somebody's coat
and offer them a drink.

You're the maid.
It's more than ours does.

One scene, Don. They send
me to pack suitcases.

Yours or theirs?

Victor's.

Then I'd be worried
if I was Victor.

I shouldn't have gone
on vacation.

What are you doing up?

I couldn't sleep. I didn't
want to wake Sally,

although you have
the creakiest floor.

It's an old house.
At least turn on a light.

Are you hungry?

Are you gonna have something?

Yes,

but I really have to be
careful this time of year.

Why?

I'm trying to reduce.

Why don't you just be the way you are?
You're beautiful.

That's charming
and you know it.

My mother wore
a girdle all the time

and she always had a stomachache
and I always thought,

"You'd rather have a stomachache
just so Dad will like you?"

Sandy,

my mother passed away
a few years ago

and I understand.

This time of year
is the hardest.

Oh, dear.

We're happy to include
you in our family.

I can't go to Juilliard.

I know how you're feeling.

I was older than you,
but I remember

when I went to Bryn Mawr,
I was terrified.

- But then the minute I--
- No.

I didn't get in.

They rejected me.

Oh.

Of course you'd lie about that.

So you'll try again next year.

Tell everyone you wanted
to finish high school.

It's incredible how fast
some people come up with lies.

Please don't do that.

I'm old for a violinist.

At least for one
as good as I am.

I don't care. All I wanted
to do was go to New York.

In a few years.

But it'll be too late.

My feet are already
in wet cement.

Plenty of girls do just
fine without Juilliard.

Sure, you go to college,

you meet a boy, you drop out,

you get married,

struggle for a year in New York
while he learns to tie a tie,

and then move to the country and
just start the whole disaster over.

That's an arrogant
exaggeration.

You have so much.

I didn't ask for it
and I don't need it.

You don't need it?

Do you know what
it's like to have nothing?

- Do you?
- Why do you keep insulting me?

I'm trying to help.

No, aren't you curious?

There are people
in the Village.

I read about it
and I even visited them.

You went to the city alone?
Did Sally go with you?

No.

But she told me you went.

That you were a model.

Yes.

And I lived with
five girls in two rooms

and ate soup out of cans.

It's not glamorous.

But I bet it was great.

It was different back then.

There weren't all
the riots and robberies.

Do you watch the news?

I visited this building

right off St. Mark's Place.

And the kids are just
living and it's beautiful.

You know?

People are naturally democratic
if you give them a chance.

Are you on dope?

No.

- But--
- But...

you're going to wait until you're
old enough to live on your own.

It's two years.

Hardly a jail sentence.

You know, you're not my child,

so there's no reason
for me to say this,

but I go to the symphony
quite a bit,

whether I like it or not,

and I am certain
that you are talented.

And on the bright side,

Sally was crushed
you were going away.

Want to use the bathroom?

- I think I'm feeling better.
- I'm not.

- There's Pepto-Bismol.
- I think it's too late.

I don't like vegetarian food.

Reminds me of Lent.

Exactly.
It's a punishment.

- Hello?
- Peggy Olson, please.

This is Peggy.
Who is this?

- Did you watch Carson?
- Who is this?

It's Burt.
Burt Peterson.

Oh.
Is everything okay?

I'm calling you at midnight.
We're screwed, Peggy.

We're at DEFCON 3. We're
about to go to DEFCON 4.

DEFCON 4 is better
than DEFCON 3.

I've told you that.
One is the worst.

- Then we're at zero.
- There is no zero.

Some comic on Carson was breaking everybody
up with this routine about the war.

Burt, it's very late and you
sound a little under the weather

and there's such a thing
as free speech in this country.

I could give a hoot. Koss Headphones
wants to pull our Super Bowl spot.

He hates the line now.

"Lend me your ears"?
It's Shakespeare.

Well, it's somehow related
to something.

The president.
I don't know. I didn't see it.

You there?

Yes.

So you got to change your ad.

- Now it's my ad?
- He wants to meet for a discussion.

- About what?
- I don't know. Something bad.

I take the client's
word for it.

- You've got to call Ted.
- About what?

I don't even know
what the problem is.

It's better coming from you.
I've got to go.

What time is it in Colorado?

I don't know. I can't
do any math right now.

I can't do any math at all.

Please, honey, don't talk.

Morning.

I guess I don't say
Merry Christmas to you.

Save that for Sylvia.
How was Hawaii?

Long ago and far away.

What's that camera
you guys are selling?

- Pentax?
- Leica.

And which model
will change my life?

Like everybody else, I only
know them by the price.

You know what?

Come by.

I got a closetful.
I'll give you one.

Come on.
I'll pay for it.

I'd give one
to Christiaan Barnard.

I might just come by.

You owe me just for
that comment alone.

- You can come by right now.
- No.

I'm gonna be in surgery till 2:00.
Maybe after.

Remember, you come by my
office, I get to go to yours.

Another glorious
morning, Dr. Rosen.

No good deed...

I don't know.

Probably part of
a deeper question.

Because, I mean, none of them are
really blonde anyway, right?

She's 29 years old.

Hair darkens by that age,
so she's probably a brunette.

Maybe she does
remind me of Jane.

No, I think it's more
than just distraction.

I think you're being
hard on me.

You used the word
"distraction."

Did I?
Well, I need a vacation.

I'm busy.
I'm a busy man.

I walk around that place,
people say "Good morning" to me.

They don't really care. They
don't know anything about me.

Oh, God, Doc,
what is it all about?

Help me.

I say--
I say that's a joke, son.

- We discussed this.
- What?

I can't laugh
at everything you say.

Either it's funny or it's not.

I don't know how
you can control yourself.

It's hard sometimes.
We talked about that, too.

What exactly
are you joking about?

You're obviously not afraid
that you're boring.

What are the events in life?

It's like you see a door.

The first time you come
to it you say,

"Oh, what's on the other
side of the door?"

Then you open a few doors.

Then you say, "I think I want to
go over that bridge this time.

I'm tired of doors." Finally you
go through one of these things

and you come out the other side and
you realize that's all there are--

doors and windows
and bridges and gates.

And they all open the same way

and they all close behind you.

Look, life is supposed
to be a path and you go along

and these things happen to you and
they're supposed to change you.

Change your direction. But it
turns out that's not true.

It turns out the experiences
are nothing.

They're just some pennies
you pick up off the floor,

stick in your pocket, and you're
just going in a straight line

to you-know-where.

You sound afraid.

More like irritated.

And what do you think
is causing that?

Top of the list, New Year's.

It's like an extra birthday.

You're supposed to blow out the
candle and wish for something.

I don't even know what it is.

How was your Christmas?

Same as the last five--
ruined by work.

- How was yours?
- I'm a widower, Peggy.

Oh. I'm sorry.

Apparently there was a bunch
of jokes on the "Tonight Show,"

in question, about soldiers
cutting off ears in Vietnam.

And obviously we are gonna have
to go in another direction.

_

What did they say?

Well, I wasn't able

to obtain a copy
or a transcript,

but Lawrence here
is a devout viewer.

I don't know
if I can do it justice.

Just shut up and do it.

Well, he came out
and started talking about

how that surgeon
in South Africa

transplanted a heart.
And he says,

"Now I know what I'm getting
President Johnson for Christmas."

- Who is this guy?
- I'm Lawrence.

- No, the comedian.
- We're finding that out.

- You have no information.
- We know the host was Phyllis Diller.

Get to the ears.

Well, I don't remember
how he got to it,

but it was something about how

the first transplants
they did were with dogs.

So obviously there could be some
sort of mix-up or something.

Dad's better, but he goes nuts
every time we run the can opener.

He hates the mailman or something.

And, oh, he keeps
ruining the carpet.

Only thing that stops him is hitting him
on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

Do you remember
the ear joke or not?

Well, he went back
to Christmas.

Did you hear about
how there are these GIs

with interesting decorations?

'Cause they cut off
the Vietcong's ears

and wore them on a string around
their neck like a trophy.

Oh.
They really did that?

There's a court-martial.

Did he actually say
"Vietcong" on Carson?

I don't remember.
This is the best I can do.

- I think you're very good.
- You think so?

So, was that it?

No.
The big laugh was

a general comes up
to one of these guys

and says, "That's not
regulation, son."

The soldier says, "Pardon? Could
you speak into my necklace?"

Biggest laugh even though the
transplant jokes were better.

That's not even funny.
What did Phyllis do?

She just said something like,

"I told you he was
a sick puppy."

When is Koss coming in?

1:00.
Should I order lunch?

He loves the Russian Tea Room.

No, this is
an emergency meeting.

I should probably
practice a little more.

The client's already seen it.

Go home.
There's no second show.

- What did Ted say?
- I left a message.

I don't think
there's anything to do

but work our way through
100 versions of no.

Listen, don't get
in your own way.

No, I've seen
creatives do this.

I've seen Ted do it.
This is the Super Bowl.

It's a lot of money. A lot
of exposure for the agency.

- There's probably awards down the road.
- I know.

Believe me, I know.

The fucking
"Tonight Show."

Now, Peggy,
I think it's the Army

that's really at fault here.

You look tan.
Did you have fun?

I'm sorry,
but your name escapes me.

I'm Bob Benson.
I'm upstairs in Accounts.

Beloit College, Wharton MBA.

Secor, Mohawk, Life Cereal.

You know,
but just in the outfield.

Yes, of course.

We spoke at
the Christmas party.

You seemed to know your way
around Pennsylvania.

You want one of these?
I get it right next door.

People will take a few extra
steps for a superior product.

Doesn't it belong
to someone else?

No, I always get two.
I don't want to share.

You know, I have through,

let's just say
low-level corruption,

obtained tickets
to the Cotton Bowl.

Crimson Tide versus Texas A&M.

You play football?

- What's in that coffee?
- Excuse me?

Oh.

Look, I've been trying
to get to know your team.

Not that I'm so important. And
they talk about you all the time.

So I guess I figured a few minutes
alone with you shouldn't be wasted.

Just a minute, Bob.

I smell creativity.

I love it down here.

I can't believe you just came off
of 10 hours of plane travel.

- You look great.
- No, Stan, you look great.

Changing the subject
ever so slightly,

during your travels did you
notice if the stewardesses

would let a mother hold a baby
on her lap the whole ride?

I believe so.

- Ha!
- Really?

Don't feel bad. I mean, how would you know?
You never had any kids.

Last time you left town,
it was in a covered wagon.

Because you're old.

You're so tan.

- So how was the vacation?
- He was on assignment.

On Waikiki Beach. How much work
do you think you got done?

Look at him. He has the
sea breeze in his hair.

You bring me something?
Huh?

Dictaphone, cocktail napkins?

Anything to give me a jump
on the Royal Hawaiian?

I had an experience.

I don't know how
to put it into words.

Isn't Sheraton
coming in on Friday?

He's still thinking.
He just got back.

I'll tell you the experience.

Megan in a bikini.

Oh, Mr. Draper.
There you are.

Good morning.
How was your trip?

It was good, thank you.
What's going on here?

They're taking portraits
for publicity.

You certainly look snappy.
I see you have coffee.

I scheduled you later in case you
missed the connection in Los Angeles.

Everything went smoothly.

Welcome back.

I'm jealous
just looking at you.

- I think you'd like it.
- I don't know if it's the photographers

or the writers, but it really
smells like reefer in here.

That has to be enough.

I think we got it.

So, they treat you
like King Kamehameha?

Miss, you mind?

Are these in color?

No, and I'm starting
to regret it.

Do you mind holding onto
the rail, gorgeous?

Think of important things.

Caroline, is the
shoeshine here yet?

No one's going
to see your shoes.

- I want you to call him.
- I did.

So, Don Ho...

did you have a blue drink
in the white sand?

Ernest Borgnine chase you down
an alleyway with a switchblade?

I love that movie.

It was nice.

I think I'm next, but I don't
want to follow that act.

So, you have anything ready
for Sheraton on Friday?

Have I ever walked into
this office after an absence

and not had you bring up
business immediately?

That's only because
I've spent every holiday

waiting on work from you.

And then you walk away from me.

And then you take a nap.

Oh, taking pictures.

Yeah, we'll be done
in a second.

Keep it down out here.

Oh, about your office.

They think it's better
for the pictures.

I don't agree.

They'll move it back.

So when I left, where was I?

I'll get you the files.

As horrible as this is,

I don't think anyone
has made this connection

outside of this comedian.

So it's likely that
any possible controversy--

Well, no one's seen
the TV spot.

They've seen the print
for three weeks,

side by side with
the news story probably.

We haven't heard a peep.

So the controversy
is still in your imagination.

I won't deny that,
but this is a horrible thing.

I believe
that's the word I used.

So?

- I thought I had a solution.
- We can't pull the ad.

Relax, Burt.
And of course we can't.

No, I thought maybe
we could just cut

"Friends, Romans, countrymen,
lend me your ears"

and just start with saying

all the great stuff
about the headphones.

That's a great idea.

- You think so?
- I think it's the first idea, but--

It solves everything.

Except it's just a man in a toga now.
It's a non sequitur.

Maybe people will think
it's some kind

of sophisticated joke
that they just didn't get.

I think that while it avoids

any possibility of controversy,
it neuters the joke.

What the hell does that mean?

Look, you don't
know what to do.

I'm telling you what do to.

You are. You have
solved the problem.

But it needs more
than a solution.

It needs to be a great ad.

This is a great place to start.
I just need a little time.

Remember how long it took
us to come up with this one?

I don't know. It just sort
of came to you, didn't it?

No, you rejected
a lot of things.

And we can't shoot one of
the things I rejected?

We just don't have the time.

Look, my job is
to introduce your headphones

to a huge, drunk,
male audience.

And it's not about my work,

it's about making a great ad.

The association
not being with Vietnam,

but with a laugh, a smile,

that all comes
from your headphones.

I don't know how to do that.

But I do.

Give me a couple days.

Okay.

You've got to get
a hold of Ted.

Why do they all
have "love" in them?

- They asked for it.
- It's a big word.

I guess they heard
it on the news.

_

- What the hell is this?
- They're newlyweds.

This couple doesn't exist.

Anything matrimonial
feels Paleolithic.

What are you suggesting? A
little Haight-Ashbury colonial?

A couple of longhairs in love?
That'll get Dow going.

As much as I'd like to join
all the ads making fun

of the ubiquitous
San Francisco hippie,

let's try to trade on the word
"love" as something substantial.

I don't think that's
possible in this context.

So why are we contributing to
the trivialization of the word?

It doesn't belong
in the kitchen.

"I love this."
"I love my oven."

"You know what I'd love? I'd love a
hamburger." We're wearing it out.

Let's leave it
where we want it.

We want that electric
jolt to the body.

We want Eros.
It's like a drug.

It's not domestic.

What's the difference
between a husband

knocking on a door and a
sailor getting off a ship?

About 10,000 volts.

- Excuse me.
- Oh.

- Don't let me interrupt.
- No, we were...

just finishing up here.

These are great.

Good to hear.

- This is a pleasant surprise.
- I got out early.

- Is that good or bad?
- What?

Oh, no. Everything's fine.
It was routine.

Well...

welcome to my hospital.

You want a coffee or something?

No.

This is quite a spread.

Well, let's get you set up.

If I looked like you
and talked like that,

I wouldn't have had
to go to medical school.

Please, don't compare
what I do to what you do.

I'm not. Just part of me was
hoping that head was empty.

Can't resist cutting
people open, can you?

All right, enough flirting.
Where's my camera?

I think this is the best one.

I don't know what to say.

Say you're gonna be
the first American

to complete a successful
heart transplant

and that you'll appear in a magazine ad
attributing your success to your Leica.

Well, if that's the only way
you can give it to me.

- I was looking for you.
- Here I am.

Dr. Arnold Rosen.

Sorry, this is Miss Chambers,
my secretary.

I'm sorry, Dr. Rosen. I didn't
know you were coming by.

Oh, no, it's not business.
He's a friend.

They're ready in your office.

- Who?
- They're setting up.

- The photographer.
- I'll do it.

No, you're gonna need a
couple weeks with those instructions.

This'll only take a minute.
Have you had lunch?

No, I have a full afternoon.

But I think our wives are cooking
something up for New Year's.

Told Sylvia to keep
it in the building.

Wasn't my idea.

No, it'll be fun.

As long as I don't have to put
on shoes, it sounds perfect.

And again, thanks for the toy.

See, but I'm free tonight.

So call in sick.

It's easier for them
to replace you than me.

Don't get out of bed yet.

Yes?

I hate to disturb you,
but it's very urgent.

Okay, okay, sit down.

I have to hang up. Looks
like something bad happened.

Well, let me know if your
situation changes. Bye.

Okay. Bye.

Bye. Bye.

What the hell is going on?

I got some tragic news.
You should sit down.

I'll be fine.

Here.

Your Aunt Jessica called.

That's what I hung up for?

Your mother passed away
this morning.

Caroline, honey,

she was 91 years old.

It's hardly a shock.

She was such a sweet woman
and I know how close you were.

For 20 years, she's been saying
this is her last Christmas.

She was always so polite to me

when she could hear me.

So I suppose I'm in charge
of the arrangements.

You want to call
your aunt back?

Nah.
She's a fruitcake.

She'll want to have a séance.

Did she say what happened?

She had a stroke

in the bathroom.

Well, I asked, didn't I?

Talk to Joan.
She'll know what to do.

Okay, okay.

Okay. You're
gonna be okay.

Cheers.

Ah, yes.
This is Peggy Olson

and I'm calling
for Mr. Chaough.

Yes, this is Peggy Olson.

Let's not exaggerate.
I've only called twice.

Look, Father--

oh, I'm sorry, Pastor.

I was raised Catholic.

Well, because my mother is.

My father is Lutheran.

Irish and Norwegian.

No, he passed away.

He was cremated.

Look, Pastor, I'm not saying

that you didn't give
Mr. Chaough the message,

I'm just saying that
it bears some urgency.

Yes, which is to say I don't
think it would bother him at all

to know that I'm on the phone.

Certainly.
Do you have a pen?

This is Peggy Olson

and I'm calling
about the Super Bowl.

I'm in the office,
he has the number.

How could you possibly have
written that down that fast?

I don't know. I think it's gonna be
Oakland or Houston against Green Bay.

And also with you.

Good night.

Phyllis, can I get some coffee?

It's gone cold.

Is this really necessary?

I just got back from Hawaii.

You're backlit,

so even with the tan you look
like you haven't slept.

Don't roll down the sleeves.
Roll them up.

- Really?
- You know what, Chico?

Forget the tripod.
Give me the camera.

Ahem.

What do I do?

I want to see you lost
in that confident thought.

I want to see the brains
behind this operation.

Well, for one thing,
I'd be behind the desk

and my desk
would be over there.

Just do what you do.

Give me a minute.

That's good.

_

_

What's wrong?

Give me a little
"Front Page."

You know, hands on the desk looking
for an answer out that window.

What?

What do you want?

I want you to be yourself.

Sorry to wake you
when you're finally sleeping,

but I waited as long
as I could.

What time is it?

They called me and they
want me to work today.

I told them about the funeral, but
they can't move it to tomorrow

because they'll need me
then, too.

In fact, they need me
for the rest of the week.

That's good, isn't it?

I called Jeff Hunter, but I think
his service won't wake him.

Isn't an agent
supposed to call you?

Good news will keep.

I feel awful about the funeral.

Will you please give Roger
my condolences?

Of course.

You should get some sleep.

How can I?
My wife's a big TV star.

Get some sleep.

Break a leg.

Why are you eating? Sandy's
coming over for lunch.

First of all, I don't know
why you're counting my meals.

And second of all,
Sandy's not coming over.

Oh.
That's a shame.

Is she sick?

Sick of being here.

She went to Juilliard early.

She did?

When?

Did you want her to say
a tearful goodbye to you?

Well, frankly, yes.

Consider yourself lucky.

She was so stuck-up.

She kept saying how
she really was going

to "look back
on this time fondly."

I can't believe she did that.

She acts like she's 25
because she uses tampons.

Sally, please.

Did she give you her address?

Can you drive Jackie
and me to the movies?

This is a great vacation.

You know, she was like
a sister to me.

A much older sister.

How she could have a boy
your age, I don't know.

You could be her grandson.

You need to
get your eyes checked.

- These are stunning rooms.
- Thank you.

He is so handsome.

I swear you have
not aged a day.

Oh, Jane, darling.

- Thank you for coming.
- I thought I should.

Excuse me. Excuse me.
I would like to speak first.

I think you just did.

No, the eulogies.
The remarks.

- I wish to go first.
- Of course. Of course.

If you need to speak
to me, I understand.

Thank you for rescuing me.

- From your admirers?
- You look wonderful.

I don't know if you remember,
but I have her ring.

I don't know
if you want it back.

What am I gonna do with it?

For Margaret or...

I don't know,
to bury her in it.

We already burned her up.
They steal that stuff anyway.

Just keep it.
She liked you.

You always paid
your rent on time.

Do you want the victuals
in the parlor?

What?

Hold on, I didn't order
any of this.

It's supposed to be
tea and petits fours.

Oh, hell, put it
in the dining room.

- I'm really sorry for your loss.
- She was a great lady.

"Bob Benson, SCDP."
Who the hell is that?

That's from us.

Daddy, I think it's time.

What's the rush?

Thank you for coming.

God, she is all kinds
of trouble, isn't she?

Everything turns
you on, doesn't it?

Is your mother still alive?

- Did I miss anything?
- You're just in time.

How many funerals
have you been to today?

- Excuse me?
- He wants to know where you got the drink.

Give my regards to Megan.

Rumor has it they're gonna
move her to four days a week.

Legend has it.

So, is she alive?

Yes, she is.

Don, what about your mother?

Still with us?

I'm gonna watch
from over there.

If I could get your attention.

I'd like to thank
everyone for coming.

I apologize
for the dry atmosphere,

but as I've been reminded
many times today,

Mother did not approve
of libations.

Excuse me, but I have
a few words to say.

I insist.

Of course. Why don't
you roll on over here?

Can everyone forget
what I've said so far

so that Mrs. Hazel Tinsley,
who graciously flew up

from Palm Beach, can have
the honor of going first?

Stay here.

I want to say
something, if I may,

at this informal moment

because I do not believe
in speaking graveside.

This is where she lived
and this is where she died.

"This woman spent 90 years
on the Earth,

of noble birth
and of some advantage,

devoting herself to one man,
but loving another.

That man was Roger."
That's you.

"When Roger Sterling Sr.'s
brief time was over,

it was this Roger
who filled her days.

One could not talk to her without
hearing about his achievements,

his wit, his kindness.

We all said, 'Mimsy.

Mims, you should find another man.
Life is long.'

She said, 'I don't need anyone.

My heart is full because
my son is my sunshine.'"

Get him out of here.

Sorry.
I'm sorry.

Where were you?

I'm sorry, but is
that man all right?

- What's he doing here?
- What?

- You heard me.
- Can we get someone in here to clean up?

- Let Bruce Pike clean it up.
- Roger.

I just wanted
to pay my respects.

I think it would have
been more respectful

of you not to come.
She didn't like you either.

I don't think
I ever met your mother.

She wouldn't if she had. This
is supposed to be just family.

- See how upset everybody is?
- Roger, stop. Stop it this minute.

- You shouldn't have brought him.
- Daddy, please.

This is my funeral!

You know what?
Party's over.

Everybody out.

Thank you very much.
Out!

Thank you.

Pardon me.
I'm looking for someone.

Could you help me?

Everybody's gone.

Not everybody, obviously.

I think they were overwhelmed
by that touching tribute.

What do you want?

That man never tires
of embarrassing himself.

You're the one who brought him.

I'm talking about Don.

Oh. He was just saying what
everybody else was thinking.

You shouldn't have brought him.

You're right.

Now you have one on me.
Do you feel better?

My mother's dead.

I know, Roger.

Must be very hard for you.

I don't feel anything.

You certainly seem emotional.

Because I need a drink.

She lived a long time.

And she knew
that you loved her.

So maybe there's nothing
to drink about.

I feel like she always wanted to
spend time with me and I never did.

That may be something
to consider.

You have a family.

Are you kidding me?
I looked out at that crowd

and all I saw was a bunch
more women I've disappointed.

Roger Sterling,
no matter what you do,

everyone loves you.

What you're seeing is them worried
about how you feel about them.

So, you miss me?

I know your daughter does.

Don't you wonder what Margaret
will say at your funeral?

You had to bring that up.

I did.

You should spend
more time with her.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Remember the last time
this bed was covered in furs?

We rolled around all over them.

- What are you doing?
- I don't know.

You look great.

It would be soothing.

Soothe yourself.

I'm gonna clean up.

Jonesy.

Mr. Draper,
are you all right?

- He's not feeling well.
- Hey, Jonesy.

Jonesy, what did you see?

I didn't see
nothing, Mr. Draper.

No, no, when you died,
what did you see?

- Don, let's get you upstairs.
- Wait, I want to know.

I want to know.

What did you see when you died?

I don't know. Doc said
I wasn't really dead.

I saw it. You were dead.
He died right there.

What did you see?

I don't like to think about it.

- You must have seen something.
- I guess there was a light.

Was it like hot,
tropical sunshine?

- I don't know.
- Did you hear the ocean?

Mr. Draper,
you should go upstairs.

- Is he all right?
- He'll be fine.

- Excuse me.
- Yeah?

- Is that St. Mark's Place?
- Yup.

I'm sorry, I'm looking
for someone.

A girl.

- Which one?
- This one.

There's lots of chicks that
come in and out of here.

I've been in the buildings across the street.
Are you sure you haven't seen her?

Look, lady, it's cold as a witch's tit.
We're going inside.

May I?

Door's always open, man.

Hey, I got the pork butt

and I lifted a bunch of onions.

Sandy?

Sandy?

Oh, I'm sorry.
Excuse me.

I'm sorry to bother you again,

but this violin,
this belongs to the girl

I was talking about. Are you
sure you haven't seen her?

Look, lady, I don't want to have
to lay the regular rap on you,

but I am exhausted
from telling people like you

- I haven't seen people like her.
- But she was here.

I haven't seen your daughter.

She's not my daughter.

So, what are you,
some kind of social worker?

Her violin teacher?

Shit.
What's her name?

Sandy.

Hey, anybody seen Sandy?

Do you know how
to make goulash?

'Cause I've got pork butt,
two onions, and lentils

which I think is what's in it.

Hey, Moon, turn around.

And paprika.
I know that's in it.

Well, for one thing,
you'll need a pot.

We got a pot.

You'll have to wash it out.

There's no water.

Really?

We used to use the hose
at the Episcopal church,

but now the pipes are frozen.

It was great here all summer.
It was hot.

So much rather be hot
than cold.

I'll go on the roof
and get a chunk of snow.

- Oh, you'll get sick.
- We do it all the time.

My mom makes great goulash.

- Where are you from?
- Everywhere.

Hold on.

I think there's
an army knife by the bed.

Hello?

Your mother still here?

No. She left.

I'm just waiting for them
to wrap up the deli.

Where's Skeezix?

Brooks took him bike riding.

It's kind of cold out there.

He can't tell the difference.

The other day
he walked in singing

and I looked
and his nose was bleeding.

He didn't know how he did it.

So he's tough.

Listen, I want you
to have something.

This was your grandmother's.

My dad brought it back for her.

He went everywhere.

- What is it?
- It's water from the River Jordan.

I was baptized with it.
So were you.

We would have used it on Ellery,
but I guess she forgot.

Hope she didn't
put her teeth in it.

Well, thank you.
It's lovely.

Did Nana Mimsy
leave me anything else?

I'm afraid she left
everything to the zoo.

She's making them
name the animals.

I'm sorry.

That doesn't seem funny to me.

It does to me.

Her will looked like
the manifest from Noah's ark.

Well, it's different for you.

Brooks didn't start
off where you did.

- He'll get there.
- Oh, I know he will.

It's just
that there's--

well, Daddy, there's
this opportunity.

I don't know, I--

I told Nana about it,

but obviously
she didn't understand.

Were you this specific?

Daddy, don't.

It's not good for you.

I worry.

Refrigeration.

It's the wave
of the future, Daddy.

They can transport fruit
all the way from California

in just four days
and it doesn't go bad.

Some of these trucks
can carry 20 tons.

And, of course, you're
buying the technology

for the refrigerated trucks, so it
doesn't matter what they get used for.

It's really not
Brooks' problem.

Well, I guess you should have
Brooks talk to me about it.

Of course.

I know he'd like to
make it on his own, but--

I'd have to see
something on paper.

Oh, he's got that, believe me.

Well, good.

And I'm glad
we had this little chat.

Oh, Daddy.

I'm going to go see if
they're done in the kitchen.

Don?

Don?

Did you make it
to the memorial?

Except for the mess, you're
exactly where I left you.

I put in an appearance.
I just should have had lunch.

Aspirin?

I'm better now.
You?

Well, I pushed Derek's
mother down the stairs.

- Did you?
- I did.

They wanted me to radiate evil,
so I looked her in the eyes,

but I don't know
how close the camera was

because it was
a stuntman in a dress.

Don't worry. I don't think there's
a nice way you can do that.

I'm not sure people will want
my autograph anymore.

Yes, they will.

So you'll still love me

even if I'm a lying,
cheating whore?

But I'm gonna walk
behind you on the stairs.

Okay. Well, I'm gonna
make you dinner.

Oh, Rosa found this
in the garbage.

I think she was afraid
you'd think she was stealing.

Sleep.
I'll come get you.

Hey, Danny, where'd
you take that joint?

There's three fucking rooms.
Where do you think I am?

No, thank you.

Is marijuana expensive?

Do I have to stir it again?

- Is it boiling?
- No.

- My coat smells like onions.
Yoo-hoo.

You better tell him you did the cooking, man.
It's your job.

It's my bag.

- It smells good.
- I made goulash.

- Did you get Wonder Bread?
- We got batteries.

Hey, Zal, did you make
any friends today?

Did you run into this chick?
What's her name?

I'm sorry.
This violin belongs

to my friend Sandy. Do you
know when she'll be back?

Sorry, Blondie, but that
violin belongs to me.

No, I know the girl who plays this
violin and I'm looking for her.

Yeah, no, I saw her.
She sold it to me.

She's trying to get enough
bread to go to California.

Says it's too cold.

So where is she now?

- Does she owe you money?
- No.

Well, your daughter's long gone,
Blondie, so why don't you run along?

- Come on, Zal.
- Why are you being so rude?

Why can't you leave her be?
Kills you to be out of control.

Well, someone needs
to control this mess.

Lady, we have to take everything
the Establishment throws away.

That's all that's left.

What you can't grok
is that we are your garbage.

You don't want this house,
you don't want us.

You're not allowed
to ask anybody to leave.

The bylaws say
if someone is a nuisance

or a narc,
that shall not be observed.

I'm obviously not
the people you're talking about.

I came here because I'm looking
for someone that I do want.

I did not throw her away.

Yeah, you're a goodie.
I can tell.

Look at this.
She's got 80 bucks.

- Can I have it?
- No. That's all they care about.

Well, Miss Elizabeth
Hofstadt Francis

of Rye, New York,

eyes blue, hair bottled,

we don't like your life
any more than you do.

You have bad manners.

You deserve to live in
the street of this pigsty,

and I hope you get tetanus or crabs or
whatever else is crawling around here.

Hey, that's my violin.

She sold it?
I don't believe you.

You want it? I'll give
it to you for 10.

What are you going
to do with a violin?

Gonna learn how to play it.

Because it's so easy.

There's a meatball, which
is probably cold by now,

and an Italian, which is
probably even colder.

You're typing a lot.
You got a new way to go?

No, I'm doing this thing
Don used to do.

I'm writing a letter
to a fictitious acquaintance

telling her how great
my new headphones are.

Well, I hate that
it gives you extra work,

but I think it's about time

this unjust war is finally
having an impact on commerce.

Meatball.

- Did we order dinner?
- No.

I can share.

Try the headphones again.
Try and think of some words.

- What have you got?
- We have three very different angles.

If you dip the audio
in the wide shot,

Mark Antony is just, you know,

mouthing the "lend me
your ears" part.

You hear the announcer say
one of these things--

One. "Are you ready for
the sound for the ages?"

Two. "Koss knows that
good sound is timeless."

Or "Ladies and gentlemen,

this is not your
old-fashioned sound."

What's the next one?

- The next one or the second one?
- You said you had three.

Those were three.
Didn't I read all of them?

Those are three different
versions of the same idea.

If you can't tell the difference
between which part's the idea

and which part's the execution of
the idea, you're of no use to me.

I know what you're doing.
I've been you.

You're hoping this
sparks my imagination

and then you can say,
"Wow, she's a genius,"

or say anything because
you want to go home.

I think they're very
different from each other.

Well, I'm sorry
to point it out,

but you're walking
over the same ground.

When you bring me something like
this, it looks like cowardice.

Here, you can split this
'cause you're not going home.

What do you think?

What?

- How do they sound?
- Scared. You were a little rough.

No, the headphones.
Don't worry about them.

Some workers
don't respond to that.

Look, Abe, I don't need
another negative voice.

And those, quote, "workers" aren't
surprised that I'm frustrated

because they know
that they're lazy.

Sorry. I didn't know
what kind of abuse

was required
to get into the frat.

Listen to your music, kid.

Because you laughed at him.

Yes, they like that.

Hello.

Where you been?

I had some errands to run.

Well, I know what somebody's
getting next Christmas.

Did you eat?

Chicken salad.

That's a relief,
because my feet are frozen.

Good morning, Mr. Draper.

Morning.
How are we today?

- Fine, thank you.
- You're welcome.

Seeing as how you
were under the weather,

I just wanted to remind you about
Jules and Terry from Sheraton later.

Cancel.

Their bosses are coming
back next week

and they just sent you
on a very expensive trip.

Would you get Stan in here?

Oh, listen.

I got this by mistake.
It belongs to some private.

See if you can find out some
way to get it to his division.

I will. Do you want
to enclose a note?

Nah. I found it
on a barstool.

I mean, you've got to be
on my side here, right?

First my ex-wife works the body
with a brutal guilt attack

and then my daughter works
the wallet like a speed bag.

You want me on your side?

- You have kids?
- We're not talking about me.

You know, I used
to jump off mountains.

It never occurred to me
I had this invisible parachute.

My mother loved me in some
completely pointless way

and it's gone.
So there it is.

She gave me my last
new experience.

And now I know that
all I'm going to be doing

from here on
is losing everything.

You feel loss.

Damn it, how many times
do I have to say this?

I don't feel anything.

I'm just acknowledging
that life,

unlike this analysis,
will eventually end

and somebody else
will get the bill.

- Good morning, Ken.
- Good morning, Bob.

What are you doing out here?

You have a meeting
with someone important?

No, but are you looking for me?

I'll drop everything. I just came
out here to enjoy the light.

Oh, I thought maybe
you were out here

greeting customers
for your catering business.

- What are you talking about?
- You know exactly.

I'm sorry,
are you cross with me?

Someone sent a royal spread
to Sterling's.

It had a card on it
with your name.

Oh, that. It just
seemed the thing to do.

Well, it was too much.

It was almost like you were
invited, but you weren't.

I guess I was just remembering
when my father died.

Any gesture
meant something to me.

There wasn't supposed
to be a card.

Okay.

Well, take your work
and go back to your office.

Sitting out here makes people
think you have nothing to do,

and I suspect you're
hoping it's the opposite.

I guess it's time to catch up
on my phone calls.

Look, we're sorry we had to squeeze
in this meeting between the holidays.

We're obviously not expecting
a full presentation.

Well, I can say
with all honesty that Don

has not stopped talking about
your incredible property.

I never stayed at the Royal, but
I shipped out of Pearl in 1943

and, I've got to say, I can
still smell the gardenias.

Thank you for that.
Don?

So, Bob Grange and his
delightful wife Patty

saw to our every need
and also missed no opportunity

to expose us
to the unique local flavor.

Lucky Bob.
I tried to get that job,

but unfortunately
I got promoted.

Well, I've just come back

and I'm not sure how much
I've talked about it,

but there is a feeling
that's stayed with me.

I've been in the winter.

It's quite a shock coming back.

Well put. But that
could be any vacation.

This was very, very different.

I think we're not selling
a geographical location.

We're selling an experience.

It's not just
a different place,

you are different.

And you'd think there'd be
an unsettling feeling

about something so drastically
different, but there's something else.

You don't miss anything.
You're not homesick.

It puts you in this state.

The air and the water

are all the same
temperature as your body.

It's sensory--
the music, the fragrance,

the breeze, and the blue.
Stan.

Ahem.

It's just a sketch.

Hawaiian legend
has it that the soul

can go in and out of the body,

but that it usually leaves from
a leeward point into the waves.

"Hawaii.
The jumping off point."

So what happened to him?

He got off the plane,
took a deep breath,

shed his skin, and jumped off.

I assume this is a photograph.

More color.
That water is transparent.

Well, I suppose it reminds
me a little of the cinema.

But mostly I see James Mason

- at the end of that movie walking
into the sea. - What is that movie?

I'm not sure I know
what you're taking about.

He's killing himself.
I don't think they show it,

but he's going to swim out
until he can't swim back.

That may be a personal
association for you,

but that's not what this means.

We looked at this. None
of us thought of that.

"A Star is Born."

The copy is all about
the Hawaiian legend.

Aloha means hello and goodbye.

I'm sorry, but this
is very poetic.

- Thank you.
- Where's our hotel?

Where's the Pink Palace
and Diamond Head?

You got to have
Diamond Head in the shot.

Anyone can do that.

I don't agree.

Well, there's no reason we can't
tilt the camera up 45 degrees

and see the husk of our
city dweller on the sand

and an arm of the hotel and
Diamond Head in the background.

So there would be a man
in this photo

and he most likely
would be naked?

Actually, my first thought
is there is no man.

Just his footprints.
What happened to him?

I think, and I think
people might think,

that he died.

Maybe he did
and he went to heaven.

Maybe that's what
this feels like.

- It's a little morbid.
- Well, heaven's a little morbid.

How do you get to heaven?
Something terrible has to happen.

We don't want that in the ad.

Of course there's
no doubt this concept itself

is merely a jumping
off the point.

A picture of a hotel,
even yours,

is easy to ignore.

This, or some version of this,
demands your attention.

Well, you will continue
to have our attention.

Make no mistake, we're not
afraid of provocative.

So is there any time left for
holiday plans for either of you?

- Happy New Year, everyone.
- You as well.

What's the matter? You didn't
get all your vomiting done

at my mother's funeral?

Roger, I apologize.
I had a bug.

Yeah, well, you didn't
miss anything.

Does that make you
think of suicide?

Of course.

That's what's so great
about it.

You know, we sold actual death

for 25 years with Lucky Strike.

You know how we did it?
We ignored it.

Hold on.

Can I go to Becky's
for New Year's Eve?

- Talk to your mother.
- Can't you get a sitter?

Have your friend come here. You can
bang pots and pans at midnight.

It's a party. They can't
bring the whole party here.

I'll stay until 9:00.
I'll put them to bed.

Hello.

Ask your mother.
We're in here.

So?

Anything new?

I hate it.
You're ugly.

What happened to you?

So?

Elizabeth Taylor,

what have you done
with my wife?

You're free until lunch, but I
have to tell you something.

Just a minute.
What's that?

More bad news.
Giorgio died.

His family sent over
his shoeshine kit

because you were the only
one who called about him.

What happened to him?

I didn't ask.

So the secret is to rub the
pot with a clove of garlic

and then add twice
the kirschwasser.

How wonderful that we can
just stagger downstairs.

I might just get undressed
in the elevator.

I don't know if I can
make it to midnight,

but I do know we're not leaving
here until those kids are in bed.

It's a beautiful fondue pot.

- Where'd you get it?
- Bloomingdales.

The kitchen store. They have
everything you could think of.

Not everything.
Tell the story.

Well, there's a guy
in my office.

He's very flamboyant
and he got arrested there.

- Shoplifting?
- No.

But he was caught
red-handed.

Apparently the men's room

is a locale for a certain
kind of assignation

and the store detective's always going
in there and looking under the stall.

So, my regional sales manager

apparently takes
two shopping bags,

puts his feet in them

while the love of his
life sat on the john.

That is clever.

How the hell did he get caught?

How old are your children?

Um, 11 and seven.

Well, I might go
kiss them good night.

Ours is a freshman at Michigan.

- He didn't even come home.
- Oh, I'm not ready for that.

The house feels empty.

Then you get a phone bill.

Well, if everybody's
had enough cheese,

I'm gonna switch to chocolate.

But first, because it looks
like it's snowing,

I think it's time
we all took a trip to Hawaii.

We're having such a good time.

It's all set up.

I want to go to Hawaii.

- Oh!
- Ooh.

- Isn't it incredible?
- Yeah.

Oh, let me explain.

I woke up in the morning
and Don was at a wedding

giving away the bride.

That's romantic.

How did that happen?

So, of course,
Kreutzer's yelling

and Ginsberg says, "I'm sorry, but
what the hell do I know about ham?"

How could they let him near clients?
Haven't they learned?

Hey, do you think Joan and Roger
are still sleeping together?

Because his mother croaked

and she completely ignored him.

I don't know. We don't even know
if that really ever happened.

I've got pictures in my head.

I'm gonna go grab some coffee.

- You want some?
- Very funny.

Hey, I'm not hanging up.

Happy New Year.

Ted. What are you
doing here?

I heard there were four people
in the office on New Year's Eve.

I figured I owed it to the
team to at least stop by.

Oh, I'm just--

there's a--
did you get my message?

I received them all.
And I apologize,

but it was sort of a
retreat for my wife and I

and, well, apparently
I work too much.

Well, you know the problem.

Yes.
Any solutions?

There's one.

I found this thing.

- What is this?
- It's an outtake.

He had his headset on
and was clowning around.

There's two minutes of it.

Look at this guy.
What a pain in the ass.

I was irritated
about it on the day,

but now I'm a little excited.

I think you can show him
making these faces,

with no music,
and say something like,

"Koss Headphones
sound so sharp and clear,

you can actually see it."

It always takes a crisis
to sell work this good.

You think it's good?

Makes me smile
more than the original.

- Do you want to see the new voice-over?
- No.

Well, I hope
I didn't ruin your evening.

Not mine, but there's people working
out there, Peggy. It's New Year's Eve.

If you knew you had something,
you should have let them go.

- They know they can go.
- No, they don't.

Oh.

You're good in a crisis.

Thank you.

Happy New Year.

He likes you.

What did you hear?

All of it.

This is Galliano.

It's from Jonesy.

I'm glad he's giving
presents to someone else.

I can't stand
the constant bootlicking.

He's grateful.

- Cent'anni.
- What does that mean?

It's Italian for l'chaim.

It means "100 years."

What do you think
Dave paid for their place?

Arnold, don't.

Fine.
Don, what did you pay?

75.

Well, you're a floor
higher than us.

Jesus.
Syl, did you hear that?

Happy New Year.

We missed midnight.
It's 1:00.

We missed it.

It's probably my mother.

Or Dave and Cathy.

Face down in the hall.

Hello?

Um, Arnie, it's the service.

Thank you.

Hello?

Okay.

All right, tell them
I'm on my way.

I've got to go.

I need cigarettes.
I'll walk you down.

It's 1:00 a.m.
in a snowstorm

on a holiday on a Sunday.

You are never gonna get a cab.

Don't even try
to talk him out of it.

- These them?
- Yeah, you see the boots?

What is it like to have
someone's life in your hands?

Well, it's a privilege
and an honor

to be trusted with
that responsibility.

There they are.

Look at that.

Time to quit smoking.

It's a good resolution.

Well...

that's one lucky patient.

Honestly, Don, the whole
life-and-death thing,

it doesn't bother me.
It never has.

Guys like us,
that's why we get paid.

- Us?
- Fine.

You get paid to think about things
they don't want to think about

and I get paid
to not think about them.

People will do anything
to alleviate their anxiety.

Did you read my Dante?

It made me think of you.

I don't know how to take that.

It's beautiful.

What do you want for this year?

I want to stop doing this.

I know.

♪ This is the moment ♪

_

♪ I've waited for ♪

♪ I can hear my heart singing ♪

♪ Soon bells... ♪

Happy New Year.

♪ Will be ringing ♪

♪ This is the moment... ♪

Happy New Year.

♪ Of sweet aloha ♪

♪ I will love you longer ♪

♪ Than forever ♪

♪ Promise me ♪

♪ That you will
leave me never ♪

Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com

♪ Here I am now, dear ♪

♪ All my love I vow, dear ♪

♪ Promise me that you ♪

♪ Will leave me never ♪

♪ I will love you longer ♪

♪ Than forever ♪