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1
00:00:03,907 --> 00:00:07,673
Ma, Ma, calm down. Listen to me.
I know it says click with the mouse...
2
00:00:07,844 --> 00:00:11,143
...but on a laptop,
the trackpad is the mouse.
3
00:00:11,314 --> 00:00:16,411
Now, put your finger on it.
No, doesn't matter which finger.
4
00:00:16,586 --> 00:00:17,610
(SCOFFS)
5
00:00:17,787 --> 00:00:19,220
Good choice.
6
00:00:19,389 --> 00:00:22,187
Yeah, now move it down
to your e-mail icon.
7
00:00:22,359 --> 00:00:24,884
Yeah, the little envelope.
8
00:00:25,061 --> 00:00:28,553
What do you mean what does it
look like? It looks like an envelope!
9
00:00:28,732 --> 00:00:31,701
Fine, you don't like the computer,
don't use it.
10
00:00:31,868 --> 00:00:35,531
Sure, we can exchange it
for a salad spinner. Goodbye.
11
00:00:37,307 --> 00:00:38,331
(SIGHS)
12
00:00:38,508 --> 00:00:41,944
That's a Hanukkah present
you're regretting, huh?
13
00:00:42,112 --> 00:00:46,208
Yeah, I won't say that all senior citizens
who can't master technology...
14
00:00:46,383 --> 00:00:50,217
...should be publicly flogged, but if
we made an example of one or two...
15
00:00:50,387 --> 00:00:52,878
...it might give the others
incentive to try harder.
16
00:00:54,824 --> 00:00:57,622
I had a great idea.
You know how we're always having...
17
00:00:57,827 --> 00:00:59,954
...to stop
and solve differential equations...
18
00:01:00,130 --> 00:01:03,691
...like when you do Fourier analysis
or using the Schrodinger equation?
19
00:01:03,867 --> 00:01:05,698
Howard doesn't. He's only an engineer.
20
00:01:07,470 --> 00:01:11,702
I think we could write a little app that
would use handwriting recognition...
21
00:01:11,875 --> 00:01:14,366
...then run it through
a symbolic evaluation engine.
22
00:01:14,544 --> 00:01:17,945
You just use your smartphone,
take a picture of the equation, and bam!
23
00:01:18,114 --> 00:01:22,710
You know what's a great app?
The one that makes fart noises.
24
00:01:27,223 --> 00:01:31,922
You know, Leonard,
that's actually a valid idea. Very good.
25
00:01:32,762 --> 00:01:35,424
Can you say that
and not make it sound like I'm a cat...
26
00:01:35,599 --> 00:01:38,124
...who learned how to use the toilet?
27
00:01:38,768 --> 00:01:41,931
No. The two achievements
are equally surprising...
28
00:01:42,105 --> 00:01:43,436
...and equally admirable.
29
00:01:43,607 --> 00:01:46,974
Though if pressed,
I'd have to give a slight edge to the cat.
30
00:01:47,143 --> 00:01:50,806
I'll save you the pain and nervousness
of waiting for the answer.
31
00:01:50,981 --> 00:01:54,439
I agree to be part of your project.
Congratulations.
32
00:01:54,918 --> 00:01:56,510
Ha, ha. Yay for me.
33
00:01:57,921 --> 00:01:59,946
What about you?
I can't promise anything...
34
00:02:00,123 --> 00:02:02,614
...but people do make money
off stuff like this.
35
00:02:02,792 --> 00:02:04,316
A few extra bucks would be nice.
36
00:02:04,494 --> 00:02:07,327
- Could move out of my mother's house.
- Where would you go?
37
00:02:07,497 --> 00:02:11,763
I always dreamed about building
a little place of my own over the garage.
38
00:02:12,469 --> 00:02:14,835
You know, if I made more money,
I could take time off...
39
00:02:15,005 --> 00:02:17,166
...and give pretty girls
submarine rides.
40
00:02:17,774 --> 00:02:20,766
What's that, some weird sex thing?
41
00:02:21,645 --> 00:02:24,443
No. You take girls underwater
in your private submarine...
42
00:02:24,614 --> 00:02:26,275
...and you show them fish.
43
00:02:26,850 --> 00:02:29,011
Why does everything
have to be dirty with you?
44
00:02:30,186 --> 00:02:33,678
I think we could work on this at night
and maybe in a couple of weeks...
45
00:02:33,857 --> 00:02:37,315
...we'll have ourselves an app to sell.
- Sounds like we're in business.
46
00:02:37,494 --> 00:02:41,487
- I think we should capture this moment.
- Yeah, let's do it.
47
00:02:42,832 --> 00:02:44,231
(FART NOISE)
48
00:02:46,636 --> 00:02:50,299
Was that the best 99 cents I ever spent
or what?
49
00:03:15,398 --> 00:03:16,660
I checked the App Store.
50
00:03:16,833 --> 00:03:20,325
No one is doing handwriting recognition
differential equation solving.
51
00:03:20,503 --> 00:03:22,971
Oh, dear Lord, shush.
52
00:03:23,973 --> 00:03:27,374
- What?
- You have so few good ideas, Leonard.
53
00:03:27,544 --> 00:03:31,674
And you're just gonna spill the beans
in front of an outsider?
54
00:03:37,353 --> 00:03:38,911
Who, me?
55
00:03:39,122 --> 00:03:43,058
Sheldon, I don't think Penny cares
about handwriting-recognition based...
56
00:03:43,226 --> 00:03:46,024
(SINGSONG)
The stars at night are big and bright
57
00:03:46,196 --> 00:03:48,824
Deep in the heart of Texas
58
00:03:49,265 --> 00:03:51,927
- She's not going to steal our idea.
- What idea?
59
00:03:52,135 --> 00:03:54,000
- We're gonna write...
- (SINGSONG) The Prairie sky
60
00:03:54,170 --> 00:03:55,296
Is wide and high
61
00:03:55,472 --> 00:03:56,496
Deep in the heart...
62
00:03:56,673 --> 00:03:59,972
- Okay, stop, stop.
- Of Texas
63
00:04:00,477 --> 00:04:03,708
Whatever your secret is,
I'm sure it's boring. So I'm not interested.
64
00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:07,372
Well, it's not boring at all.
You see, in higher-order mathematics...
65
00:04:07,550 --> 00:04:09,882
...there are certain sets of equations...
- Bored.
66
00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:12,717
- Satisfied?
- (IN NORMAL VOICE) Hardly.
67
00:04:12,889 --> 00:04:15,824
Consider this unlikely
but very plausible scenario.
68
00:04:15,992 --> 00:04:18,688
A young woman alone in the big city.
69
00:04:18,862 --> 00:04:21,023
Her ridiculous dream
of becoming an actress...
70
00:04:21,197 --> 00:04:23,256
...lies shattered about her.
71
00:04:23,433 --> 00:04:26,459
- Hey, wait a minute.
- Hang on, let's see where he's going.
72
00:04:26,669 --> 00:04:29,502
Then it hits her,
how is she going to survive?
73
00:04:29,672 --> 00:04:33,199
But she has no prospects,
no marketable skills.
74
00:04:33,376 --> 00:04:36,573
And then one day,
she meets a group of geniuses...
75
00:04:36,746 --> 00:04:38,509
...and their friend Howard.
76
00:04:41,851 --> 00:04:44,342
- Hey, l...
- Hang on, let's see where he's going.
77
00:04:45,555 --> 00:04:50,754
She befriends them, and then lies in wait
until they reveal a marketable idea...
78
00:04:50,927 --> 00:04:53,896
...which she steals
and sells to the highest bidder.
79
00:04:54,063 --> 00:04:55,121
That is ridiculous.
80
00:04:55,298 --> 00:04:57,766
Is it? Let's see you come up
with an explanation...
81
00:04:57,934 --> 00:05:01,097
...as to why this woman
hangs out with us all the time.
82
00:05:04,741 --> 00:05:06,800
I've already mooched dinner
off you guys.
83
00:05:06,976 --> 00:05:11,072
- I don't need to listen to this.
- There's your answer, free food.
84
00:05:12,248 --> 00:05:15,877
All right, I've taken the liberty
of drafting these workflow charts...
85
00:05:16,152 --> 00:05:18,916
...which outline our duties
and the path we will follow...
86
00:05:19,088 --> 00:05:21,989
...as we develop
our groundbreaking new app.
87
00:05:22,792 --> 00:05:25,352
Hey. Why am I in charge
of phone support?
88
00:05:27,697 --> 00:05:29,688
Seems a bit racist.
89
00:05:29,866 --> 00:05:32,664
A customer service representative
with an Indian accent...
90
00:05:32,836 --> 00:05:35,498
...will create the impression
we're a vast enterprise...
91
00:05:35,672 --> 00:05:37,503
...that uses overseas call centers.
92
00:05:37,674 --> 00:05:41,576
Oh, very clever. But still racist.
93
00:05:41,744 --> 00:05:45,578
Duly noted, Steve from Wichita.
94
00:05:45,748 --> 00:05:49,275
Hey, why am I listed
as your executive assistant?
95
00:05:49,452 --> 00:05:53,047
Because the word secretary
has fallen into disrepute.
96
00:05:53,223 --> 00:05:55,282
Oh, FYI,
my mother's birthday is coming up.
97
00:05:55,458 --> 00:05:57,517
I'm going to need you
to pick up a present.
98
00:05:58,928 --> 00:06:01,123
Okay, we need to stop for a minute.
99
00:06:01,331 --> 00:06:04,232
We can talk during break.
We have one coming up at midnight.
100
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:07,767
- And we'll need snacks.
- Sheldon, you're not in charge.
101
00:06:07,937 --> 00:06:10,269
- It's my idea. I'm in charge.
- Oh, of course, you are.
102
00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:13,637
Look at the organizational chart.
You're clearly listed as founder.
103
00:06:13,843 --> 00:06:17,438
Yes, and you're listed
as chief executive officer...
104
00:06:17,614 --> 00:06:20,549
...chief financial officer
and chief operating officer.
105
00:06:20,750 --> 00:06:23,742
You missed chief science officer,
chairman of the board and...
106
00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:27,151
...head of the Secret Santa committee.
- Okay.
107
00:06:27,357 --> 00:06:31,885
You need to get clear on this right now:
I am in charge of this project.
108
00:06:32,662 --> 00:06:36,393
Ooh, Leonard's going all alpha nerd
on Sheldon's ass.
109
00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:39,425
All right.
I'm not going to argue with you.
110
00:06:39,602 --> 00:06:41,832
Sheldon Cooper
is nothing if not a team player.
111
00:06:42,005 --> 00:06:45,463
Dr. Hofstadter, you have the con.
112
00:06:46,776 --> 00:06:49,643
Thank you. I thought we might start...
113
00:06:49,812 --> 00:06:52,975
...by talking about the user interface.
- Dear Lord, we're doomed.
114
00:06:55,451 --> 00:06:59,012
So this button here
will allow you to scan a new equation...
115
00:06:59,188 --> 00:07:01,053
...but over here, you can press this...
116
00:07:01,224 --> 00:07:03,920
...and just substitute
new values for the coefficients.
117
00:07:04,093 --> 00:07:05,958
Ha, ha. Good one, boss.
118
00:07:09,632 --> 00:07:11,463
- What?
- This diagram.
119
00:07:11,634 --> 00:07:13,761
Well, I assume
you were opening with a joke.
120
00:07:13,937 --> 00:07:18,203
It certainly buoyed up this employee's
esprit de corps.
121
00:07:19,642 --> 00:07:21,701
It's not a joke. It's the real design.
122
00:07:21,878 --> 00:07:26,975
In that case, may I offer 27 little tweaks
to make it slightly less embarrassing?
123
00:07:27,583 --> 00:07:30,643
Sheldon, I think this will work.
Let's just try it my way.
124
00:07:30,853 --> 00:07:33,048
Oh, I'm sorry.
I assumed that you wanted...
125
00:07:33,222 --> 00:07:35,281
...candid truth-telling
from your employees.
126
00:07:35,458 --> 00:07:37,983
But I realize now,
you want the mindless nattering...
127
00:07:38,161 --> 00:07:40,561
...of complacent yes-men.
128
00:07:41,164 --> 00:07:43,564
- Are you done?
- Lf you say so, boss.
129
00:07:46,102 --> 00:07:49,594
Right now, this button-press event
is triggering a dummy procedure call.
130
00:07:49,772 --> 00:07:51,797
How about this for the app name?
131
00:07:51,975 --> 00:07:55,240
The Surprisingly Helpful
Equation-Linked Differential...
132
00:07:55,411 --> 00:07:58,073
...Optimized Numerator.
133
00:07:58,915 --> 00:08:01,475
So it spells "Sheldon."
134
00:08:02,785 --> 00:08:05,913
Does it? A happy accident.
135
00:08:06,756 --> 00:08:10,317
- We're not doing names now. Howard?
- Like I was saying...
136
00:08:10,493 --> 00:08:13,587
...now, it's a dummy procedure.
Eventually, it will drop us in...
137
00:08:13,763 --> 00:08:15,628
If we're not going to give it a name...
138
00:08:15,798 --> 00:08:18,528
...can we at least give it
a secret code designation?
139
00:08:18,701 --> 00:08:19,793
- No.
- Hear me out.
140
00:08:19,969 --> 00:08:22,199
The atomic bomb
was the Manhattan Project...
141
00:08:22,405 --> 00:08:25,033
...Windows 95
was originally Project Chicago.
142
00:08:25,208 --> 00:08:29,542
For our app, I would humbly suggest
Project Nodlehs.
143
00:08:30,513 --> 00:08:32,845
That's just Sheldon backwards.
144
00:08:33,049 --> 00:08:34,949
Another happy accident.
145
00:08:35,918 --> 00:08:38,648
We're not wasting time
with names right now.
146
00:08:38,821 --> 00:08:40,516
I see.
147
00:08:40,923 --> 00:08:43,483
- Is that decision open for discussion?
- No.
148
00:08:44,027 --> 00:08:45,654
Is the decision to not discuss...
149
00:08:45,828 --> 00:08:47,455
...open for discussion?
- No.
150
00:08:48,031 --> 00:08:49,658
Again, right now...
151
00:08:49,832 --> 00:08:52,699
...it's a dummy procedure,
but eventually, it will drop us...
152
00:08:52,869 --> 00:08:55,861
I call for a vote of no confidence
and a change in leadership.
153
00:08:56,039 --> 00:08:58,337
- Sheldon, stop it.
- When in the course of human events...
154
00:08:58,508 --> 00:09:00,806
...it becomes necessary
to dissolve the bonds...
155
00:09:00,977 --> 00:09:03,537
...that tie three scientists...
- Enough, Sheldon.
156
00:09:03,713 --> 00:09:05,647
Let's get to the vote. Show of hands...
157
00:09:05,815 --> 00:09:08,306
...all opposed to Leonard
and his reign of tyranny:
158
00:09:11,154 --> 00:09:14,988
- Okay, that's it, you're fired.
- Really?
159
00:09:15,158 --> 00:09:16,182
Why?
160
00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:20,588
Because you're impossible
to work with.
161
00:09:21,164 --> 00:09:22,188
I see.
162
00:09:26,235 --> 00:09:28,226
And is that open for discussion?
163
00:09:34,177 --> 00:09:37,908
- What are you doing?
- Oh, good morning, shoemaker.
164
00:09:38,081 --> 00:09:42,245
I think you'll be pleased with what
the elves were up to last night.
165
00:09:42,919 --> 00:09:44,250
But I fired you.
166
00:09:44,420 --> 00:09:46,479
Oh, I know.
I'm now an independent contractor.
167
00:09:47,924 --> 00:09:49,949
No, you are now nothing.
168
00:09:50,126 --> 00:09:52,856
You have no connection
to this project whatsoever.
169
00:09:53,029 --> 00:09:54,929
But I made it better.
170
00:09:55,098 --> 00:09:57,532
I don't want it better. I want it my way.
171
00:09:57,733 --> 00:10:00,099
Well, that speaks volumes, doesn't it?
172
00:10:01,204 --> 00:10:04,867
All right, I suppose
I'll go put on my bus pants.
173
00:10:05,041 --> 00:10:07,976
- What the hell are bus pants?
- They are pants one wears...
174
00:10:08,144 --> 00:10:10,704
...over regular pants
when one sits on bus seats...
175
00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:13,212
...that other people
have previously sat on.
176
00:10:14,450 --> 00:10:17,715
But, perhaps, from your lofty heights
atop the corporate ladder...
177
00:10:17,887 --> 00:10:21,914
...you've lost touch with the struggles
of the common man.
178
00:10:22,091 --> 00:10:24,651
Look, I'm still happy
to drive you to work.
179
00:10:24,827 --> 00:10:28,627
Nothing's changed in that regard.
We're still roommates, still friends.
180
00:10:28,798 --> 00:10:31,562
Except you identified me,
your best friend...
181
00:10:31,734 --> 00:10:33,099
...as a gangrenous limb...
182
00:10:33,269 --> 00:10:36,102
...that needed to be severed
from the organism and tossed.
183
00:10:36,272 --> 00:10:41,175
The desperate act of a little man
with a big Napoleon complex.
184
00:10:43,546 --> 00:10:46,310
You know what?
Go put on your bus pants.
185
00:10:53,489 --> 00:10:57,118
Mm, last night, I had a dream
we got so rich from the app...
186
00:10:57,293 --> 00:10:59,887
...you and I bought
matching side-by-side mansions.
187
00:11:00,062 --> 00:11:01,086
(CHUCKLES)
188
00:11:01,264 --> 00:11:02,891
But there was a secret tunnel...
189
00:11:03,065 --> 00:11:06,091
...connecting your front yard
to my back yard.
190
00:11:11,107 --> 00:11:12,540
What do you think that means?
191
00:11:14,076 --> 00:11:17,637
It means after we play handball,
I'm showering at home.
192
00:11:20,750 --> 00:11:23,913
Oh, good morning,
friend Howard, friend Raj.
193
00:11:24,086 --> 00:11:26,953
I see you gentlemen
are enjoying beverages.
194
00:11:27,123 --> 00:11:30,115
Perhaps, they would taste better
out of these.
195
00:11:31,761 --> 00:11:35,993
- "World's Greatest Astrophysicist"?
- Don't thank me, you earned it.
196
00:11:37,500 --> 00:11:40,094
"Howard Wolowitz."
197
00:11:42,305 --> 00:11:44,705
Why not "World's Greatest Engineer"?
198
00:11:44,874 --> 00:11:47,365
Oh, I'm sorry,
I typed that into the label maker...
199
00:11:47,577 --> 00:11:51,172
...but I just couldn't press enter.
Now down to business.
200
00:11:51,347 --> 00:11:53,815
What would it take
for you to abandon Leonard...
201
00:11:53,983 --> 00:11:55,848
...and join me in a rival company?
202
00:11:56,018 --> 00:11:57,986
Unless, of course, mugs are sufficient.
203
00:11:58,154 --> 00:12:00,486
In which case, welcome aboard.
204
00:12:01,090 --> 00:12:05,390
- We're not quitting on Leonard.
- I understand. Your loyalty is admirable.
205
00:12:05,595 --> 00:12:08,996
But what if I were to up the ante?
206
00:12:09,832 --> 00:12:11,163
What are you talking about?
207
00:12:11,801 --> 00:12:16,329
Monogrammed key chains
with a built-in laser pointer.
208
00:12:20,009 --> 00:12:21,033
No?
209
00:12:22,478 --> 00:12:27,381
How about can cozies
emblazoned with our university mascot?
210
00:12:28,484 --> 00:12:30,349
Go Beavers.
211
00:12:32,888 --> 00:12:34,480
I'll be back.
212
00:12:36,025 --> 00:12:38,186
Okay, let's try this one.
213
00:12:40,930 --> 00:12:42,591
Spherical Hankel function.
214
00:12:42,765 --> 00:12:44,426
Hold on.
215
00:12:44,634 --> 00:12:46,693
- That's it!
- Yes! Eureka!
216
00:12:46,869 --> 00:12:50,532
We agreed when it was "eureka" time,
we were all gonna say it together.
217
00:12:51,073 --> 00:12:54,873
- Fine, let's say it together.
- No, the moment has passed.
218
00:12:55,778 --> 00:12:57,746
Greetings, gentlemen.
219
00:12:57,913 --> 00:12:59,608
How goes your little project?
220
00:12:59,782 --> 00:13:02,410
You mean Project Lenwoloppali?
221
00:13:03,786 --> 00:13:06,949
A combination of all your names.
Very clever.
222
00:13:07,156 --> 00:13:09,716
I assume "Koothranardowitz"
was taken.
223
00:13:11,661 --> 00:13:14,061
We're scanning equations
and getting good results.
224
00:13:14,230 --> 00:13:16,596
Oh, well, then by all means, carry on.
225
00:13:16,766 --> 00:13:18,927
I wouldn't wanna
impede your progress.
226
00:13:19,101 --> 00:13:21,467
Howard, did you solve
the install time problem?
227
00:13:21,671 --> 00:13:24,162
No, it's tricky. I'm gonna try having it
pick up the libraries...
228
00:13:24,340 --> 00:13:26,831
(PLAYING THEREMIN)
229
00:13:32,448 --> 00:13:33,813
What are you doing?
230
00:13:34,984 --> 00:13:37,452
Playing the theremin.
231
00:13:39,055 --> 00:13:42,422
No, I mean,
what are you doing with a theremin?
232
00:13:43,259 --> 00:13:44,954
Playing it.
233
00:13:45,928 --> 00:13:49,921
I've loved the theremin from the moment
I heard original Star Trek theme.
234
00:13:50,099 --> 00:13:54,798
And it's been killing me that
it just sits in my closet gathering dust.
235
00:14:08,851 --> 00:14:12,412
- Sheldon, we're working here.
- That's all right.
236
00:14:12,588 --> 00:14:15,284
I can barely hear you
over my theremin.
237
00:14:19,862 --> 00:14:20,988
(THEREMIN STOPS PLAYING)
238
00:14:22,465 --> 00:14:24,592
Well, that was a little uncalled for.
239
00:14:24,767 --> 00:14:27,861
No, that was completely called for.
We need quiet.
240
00:14:28,037 --> 00:14:30,198
So your project
is more important than mine?
241
00:14:30,373 --> 00:14:33,865
Well, seeing as your project
is to sabotage my project, yes.
242
00:14:34,043 --> 00:14:35,704
Don't beat around the bush, Leonard.
243
00:14:35,878 --> 00:14:38,813
If you don't want me here,
just say the word and I'll leave.
244
00:14:43,652 --> 00:14:45,677
Could have beaten
around the bush a little.
245
00:14:48,591 --> 00:14:52,391
(SINGING)
Nobody knows
246
00:14:52,561 --> 00:14:55,758
The trouble I've seen
247
00:14:55,931 --> 00:15:01,301
Nobody knows my sorrow
Oh
248
00:15:05,374 --> 00:15:08,673
What you doing,
trying to contact your home planet?
249
00:15:09,512 --> 00:15:11,241
I'm practicing my theremin.
250
00:15:11,414 --> 00:15:12,438
Oh.
251
00:15:13,315 --> 00:15:15,442
(SINGING)
Nobody knows
252
00:15:15,618 --> 00:15:18,382
The trouble I've seen
253
00:15:18,554 --> 00:15:22,320
Glory hallelujah
254
00:15:24,193 --> 00:15:26,718
Something got you down
there, Sheldon?
255
00:15:26,896 --> 00:15:29,160
Leonard kicked me out
of my own apartment.
256
00:15:29,331 --> 00:15:32,266
- And his app team.
- Oh, honey, I'm sorry.
257
00:15:32,435 --> 00:15:36,735
He wouldn't drive me to work today.
I had to wear my bus pants.
258
00:15:37,006 --> 00:15:39,873
- Is that so?
- Yes, and they're still sticky.
259
00:15:40,042 --> 00:15:41,134
Aw.
260
00:15:41,310 --> 00:15:42,800
Probably gonna have
to throw them away.
261
00:15:42,978 --> 00:15:45,208
(PLAYING THEREMIN)
262
00:15:45,514 --> 00:15:47,539
Hey, you don't need Leonard
and his app.
263
00:15:47,716 --> 00:15:49,445
You can make one with me.
264
00:15:49,618 --> 00:15:50,710
With you?
265
00:15:50,886 --> 00:15:52,046
(PLAYING THEREMIN)
266
00:15:52,555 --> 00:15:56,013
- Seriously, I have a great idea for one.
- Is it better than your idea...
267
00:15:56,192 --> 00:15:59,025
...to move to Los Angeles
and become a famous actress?
268
00:16:01,130 --> 00:16:03,291
When you see someone
wearing shoes you like...
269
00:16:03,466 --> 00:16:06,299
...you snap a picture
and the app goes on the Internet...
270
00:16:06,469 --> 00:16:10,303
...to find out where you can buy them.
- That's your app idea?
271
00:16:10,473 --> 00:16:13,340
- You don't like it?
- I didn't say that. But no, I don't.
272
00:16:14,910 --> 00:16:17,470
- Why not?
- Oh, Penny, where do I begin?
273
00:16:17,646 --> 00:16:19,443
The simple-mindedness of your idea...
274
00:16:19,615 --> 00:16:23,483
...is exceeded only by
its crass consumerism and banality.
275
00:16:23,719 --> 00:16:27,052
And Leonard didn't wanna
work with you, imagine that.
276
00:16:27,223 --> 00:16:28,622
I know, it's baffling.
277
00:16:30,826 --> 00:16:33,920
(SINGING)
Nobody knows
278
00:16:34,096 --> 00:16:37,190
The trouble I've seen
279
00:16:37,366 --> 00:16:40,597
Sheldon, I'm gonna make some cocoa.
Do you want some?
280
00:16:40,769 --> 00:16:43,169
- Do you make it with milk or water?
- Milk.
281
00:16:43,372 --> 00:16:46,068
- Real cocoa?
- That's what it says on the packet.
282
00:16:46,675 --> 00:16:49,235
- You have little those marshmallows?
- No, sorry.
283
00:16:49,945 --> 00:16:52,743
- Well, I suppose it's appropriate.
- What does that mean?
284
00:16:52,915 --> 00:16:56,316
A disappointing drink
for a disappointing day.
285
00:16:59,522 --> 00:17:01,683
Look. Twenty people
from the university...
286
00:17:01,891 --> 00:17:04,155
...have already signed up
for our private beta.
287
00:17:04,326 --> 00:17:08,422
I tell you, the Lenwoloppali Differential
Equation Scanner meets a real need.
288
00:17:08,597 --> 00:17:09,621
We've got a hit.
289
00:17:09,798 --> 00:17:11,857
Ha, ha, what do you think
we should sell it for?
290
00:17:12,034 --> 00:17:14,195
Based on the fact that
our potential market...
291
00:17:14,403 --> 00:17:17,133
...is about 70 or 80 guys,
and you want a submarine...
292
00:17:17,306 --> 00:17:19,467
...l'd say about a million dollars a pop.
293
00:17:20,209 --> 00:17:22,803
What if we put out
a light version for half a million?
294
00:17:22,978 --> 00:17:24,343
Get the word of mouth going.
295
00:17:24,547 --> 00:17:25,673
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
296
00:17:25,848 --> 00:17:27,372
Hi, I'm sorry to bother you guys...
297
00:17:27,550 --> 00:17:29,609
...but you've gotta
come take Sheldon back.
298
00:17:29,785 --> 00:17:32,948
- What's he doing in your apartment?
- He was moping in the lobby...
299
00:17:33,122 --> 00:17:35,113
...so I invited him over. I regret it.
300
00:17:35,291 --> 00:17:37,782
Why do you regret...?
Never mind, stupid question.
301
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:40,019
Can't you just let him play
until bedtime?
302
00:17:41,931 --> 00:17:44,058
We're not playing. This is real work.
303
00:17:44,233 --> 00:17:46,326
We're gonna be hundredaires.
304
00:17:47,036 --> 00:17:50,369
Okay, what if I got him to apologize
and promise to behave?
305
00:17:53,642 --> 00:17:56,076
Then I guess we would let him
back on the app team.
306
00:17:56,245 --> 00:18:01,342
While we're doing that, you could take
an aerial tour of L.A. On your flying pig.
307
00:18:02,318 --> 00:18:04,218
Okay, wait right here.
308
00:18:05,721 --> 00:18:06,983
I'll tell you one thing...
309
00:18:07,156 --> 00:18:10,990
...if I get rich, that's the kind of girl
I wanna take on a submarine ride.
310
00:18:12,194 --> 00:18:15,061
And yes,
that time I meant it to be dirty.
311
00:18:17,666 --> 00:18:18,860
Really?
312
00:18:19,034 --> 00:18:20,365
Leonard wants me back?
313
00:18:20,536 --> 00:18:23,733
Oh, yes.
He says they are lost without you.
314
00:18:24,840 --> 00:18:27,434
Well, we sure saw that coming.
315
00:18:27,610 --> 00:18:30,238
- That's right.
- You know what I'm going to do?
316
00:18:30,412 --> 00:18:33,609
I am going to sit here
and just let them stew.
317
00:18:34,717 --> 00:18:37,311
(PLAYING THEREMIN)
318
00:18:37,486 --> 00:18:39,852
No, no, no.
You know, they have suffered enough.
319
00:18:40,022 --> 00:18:43,116
You know,
everybody's suffered enough.
320
00:18:43,292 --> 00:18:44,384
The thing is...
321
00:18:44,560 --> 00:18:47,927
...you're gonna have to offer him
a face-saving way out of this.
322
00:18:48,530 --> 00:18:50,293
- How?
- Say you're sorry.
323
00:18:50,499 --> 00:18:55,436
Oh, no. Mrs. Mary Cooper
didn't raise her no liars.
324
00:18:56,438 --> 00:19:00,306
Okay. Um, how about this? You know
how you're always trying to learn...
325
00:19:00,509 --> 00:19:01,635
...about sarcasm?
326
00:19:01,810 --> 00:19:03,368
- No.
- No?
327
00:19:03,545 --> 00:19:04,807
I was being sarcastic.
328
00:19:06,382 --> 00:19:07,781
Oh, good for you.
329
00:19:07,950 --> 00:19:10,544
All you have to do
is say you're sorry to Leonard...
330
00:19:10,719 --> 00:19:12,482
...but say it sarcastically.
331
00:19:12,655 --> 00:19:14,623
Of course.
332
00:19:14,790 --> 00:19:17,224
He will hear it
as an attempt to mend fences...
333
00:19:17,393 --> 00:19:21,762
...as opposed to the withering
condemnation you and I know it to be.
334
00:19:22,598 --> 00:19:25,294
Yeah, that was my plan.
All right. Come on. Let's go.
335
00:19:25,467 --> 00:19:28,959
By the way,
thank you for the delicious cocoa.
336
00:19:29,138 --> 00:19:31,572
- Oh, you're welcome.
- Oh, I'm getting good at this.
337
00:19:35,277 --> 00:19:38,474
Okay, now that you're back on the team
let's get you caught up.
338
00:19:38,647 --> 00:19:41,980
Before you begin, let me say again
how deeply sorry I am...
339
00:19:42,151 --> 00:19:43,618
...for my earlier behavior...
340
00:19:43,786 --> 00:19:48,189
...and how much I respect and admire
your leadership.
341
00:19:49,491 --> 00:19:51,356
Thank you.
342
00:19:55,464 --> 00:19:56,954
So as you can see...
343
00:19:57,132 --> 00:19:59,760
...not only can you store
your favorite equations...
344
00:19:59,935 --> 00:20:02,199
...but you can forward them
to your friends...
345
00:20:02,371 --> 00:20:05,863
...or post them on Facebook
right from the app.
346
00:20:06,075 --> 00:20:08,441
- Well, I must say, I am impressed.
- Thanks.
347
00:20:08,610 --> 00:20:11,943
- You all have put in a lot of hard work.
- We have.
348
00:20:12,114 --> 00:20:15,550
You have taken the most important step
on the road to success:
349
00:20:15,718 --> 00:20:19,347
Learning what not to do.
Now, let's start fresh.
350
00:20:19,888 --> 00:20:22,618
Howard, we're going to need some tea.
351
00:20:28,630 --> 00:20:31,758
Okay, these are Uggs.
352
00:20:31,934 --> 00:20:34,425
These are Crocs.
353
00:20:34,603 --> 00:20:38,403
- These are knockoff Manolo Blahniks.
- Bored.
354
00:20:38,607 --> 00:20:41,201
You said it yourself,
we have to create a database...
355
00:20:41,376 --> 00:20:43,310
...before you can write an algo-thingy.
356
00:20:43,612 --> 00:20:47,173
Algorithm. You see, Penny,
Alan Turing defines an algorithm...
357
00:20:47,349 --> 00:20:48,976
Bored.
358
00:20:49,151 --> 00:20:51,483
Okay. These are Steve Maddens.
359
00:20:51,653 --> 00:20:53,678
These are Nine West.
360
00:20:53,856 --> 00:20:57,223
These are Target.
Oh, but don't they look like Chanel?
361
00:20:57,392 --> 00:21:00,555
- These are Michael Kors.
- (SINGING) Nobody knows
362
00:21:00,729 --> 00:21:02,663
- The trouble I've seen
- These are Roxy.
363
00:21:02,831 --> 00:21:04,696
- Nobody knows
- These are Seychelles.
364
00:21:04,867 --> 00:21:06,698
- My sorrow
Oh, these are Betsy Johnson.
365
00:21:06,869 --> 00:21:07,927
They're so cute.
30848
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