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1
00:00:02,127 --> 00:00:03,627
Okay, it's done.
2
00:00:03,837 --> 00:00:07,047
Look, guys, for the future,
I don't mind killing the big spiders...
3
00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:10,551
...but you have to at least try
with the little ones.
4
00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:14,888
Penny, please. We're facing a far more
serious problem than stray arachnids.
5
00:00:15,098 --> 00:00:18,934
- Sheldon, it's not that bad.
- Not bad? It's horrible.
6
00:00:19,102 --> 00:00:22,855
You hear stories about this sort of thing.
You never think it will happen to you.
7
00:00:23,064 --> 00:00:26,775
So they steamed your dumplings.
Get over it.
8
00:00:27,944 --> 00:00:29,820
New topic, please.
9
00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:33,240
All right, Penny.
Let me take this opportunity to point out...
10
00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:37,411
...that you are looking particularly
ravishing today.
11
00:00:38,621 --> 00:00:41,415
Not with a thousand condoms, Howard.
12
00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:45,961
So there is a number.
13
00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:49,006
Okay. New topic, please.
14
00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:51,550
Hey, did you hear the people
in 5-A are moving out?
15
00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:54,136
- No. Shh-shh-shh!
- Why?
16
00:00:54,512 --> 00:00:57,056
- The people upstairs are moving out.
- No.
17
00:00:57,932 --> 00:01:00,225
The horror.
18
00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:02,811
Why would you just say something
like that?
19
00:01:02,979 --> 00:01:06,273
- How else...?
- No, no, no.
20
00:01:06,691 --> 00:01:08,484
How else was I supposed to say it?
21
00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:13,155
Slowly. Like putting a new fish in a tank.
You don't just drop it in.
22
00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:17,367
You let the bag sit in the water
a while.
23
00:01:17,577 --> 00:01:19,661
The horror.
24
00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:23,373
- Sheldon, I'm sure it's gonna be fine.
- No, it's not going to be fine.
25
00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:27,336
Change is never fine.
They say it is, but it's not.
26
00:01:27,796 --> 00:01:30,380
Okay, did you even know the people
that are moving out?
27
00:01:30,590 --> 00:01:31,840
I never met them.
28
00:01:32,008 --> 00:01:34,343
That's what made them perfect.
29
00:01:34,552 --> 00:01:36,512
There were no awkward hellos
in the halls.
30
00:01:36,679 --> 00:01:39,932
There's no clickety-clacking
of high-heel shoes on hardwood floors.
31
00:01:40,141 --> 00:01:44,937
They may as well have been a family of cats
just jumping around from drape to drape.
32
00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:48,607
And without that annoying
ammonia-urine smell.
33
00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:52,236
I'm sure the new people
will be just as quiet.
34
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:55,239
You can't know that.
How can you possibly know that?
35
00:01:55,448 --> 00:01:58,909
You're right, I can't. You know what?
Anyone could rent that apartment now.
36
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,995
An opera singer, the cast of Stomp.
37
00:02:04,374 --> 00:02:07,209
Yeah, a tap-dancing pirate
with a wooden leg.
38
00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,212
Why are you making it worse?
39
00:02:10,421 --> 00:02:13,382
I tried making it better,
he wouldn't go for it.
40
00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:14,591
[INAUDIBLE]
41
00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:16,885
- You're right. That's a great idea.
- What?
42
00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:20,097
I'll take the apartment.
I can finally get away from my mother...
43
00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:23,392
...and we can all spend
some more time together.
44
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,811
If you catch my drift.
45
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:30,399
The horror.
46
00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:56,383
Hold on.
47
00:02:56,593 --> 00:02:59,595
Do you honestly expect me to believe
social protocol dictates...
48
00:02:59,804 --> 00:03:05,058
...we break our backs helping Wolowitz
move, and he only need buy us a pizza?
49
00:03:05,476 --> 00:03:08,896
I'm sorry, that really is how it works.
50
00:03:09,105 --> 00:03:10,981
You're tricking me.
51
00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:14,193
- Tell me the truth, what do we get?
- Ha.
52
00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:16,612
Raj, help me out here.
53
00:03:16,779 --> 00:03:19,489
You get to choose
between a mountain bike or a PS3.
54
00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:21,450
I knew it.
55
00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:25,078
- PS3, definitely PS3.
- Mm-hm.
56
00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:26,788
Who would pick a mountain bike?
57
00:03:28,625 --> 00:03:32,294
HOWARD: Enough with the guilt, Ma.
We'll still see each other.
58
00:03:32,503 --> 00:03:34,922
I'll come over every night
and have dinner with you.
59
00:03:35,131 --> 00:03:37,591
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
The hell you will!
60
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:42,137
What am I running here,
a fancy restaurant?
61
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:44,556
Does this look like Olive Garden?
62
00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:48,143
HOWARD:
Okay, I get it, you're angry.
63
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:51,480
You don't wanna see
your little bird leave the nest.
64
00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:54,983
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Little bird? You're almost 30!
65
00:03:55,777 --> 00:03:58,612
Fly for God's sake.
66
00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:01,198
HOWARD:
Fine, I'll stay. You happy, crazy lady?
67
00:04:01,407 --> 00:04:03,867
I sure as hell hope so,
because you're ruining my life!
68
00:04:04,035 --> 00:04:05,452
[DOOR SLAMS]
69
00:04:06,996 --> 00:04:10,707
Hey, Penny, it's Leonard. Good news,
you can take your head out of the oven.
70
00:04:12,335 --> 00:04:14,169
I guess I won't be needing this.
71
00:04:19,300 --> 00:04:21,927
Oh, no.
72
00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:25,055
The new ones.
73
00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:28,350
[IN SINGSONG VOICE]
They're here.
74
00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:31,853
Stay calm.
We don't know anything about them yet.
75
00:04:32,021 --> 00:04:33,939
[OBJECTS RATTLING]
76
00:04:35,316 --> 00:04:38,944
- What are you doing?
- I'm checking for musical instruments.
77
00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:42,739
Does that sound like castanets to you?
78
00:04:43,199 --> 00:04:44,533
The box says "kitchen."
79
00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:48,370
So? Do cocaine smugglers
write "cocaine" on the box?
80
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:52,958
- Hello?
- Hello.
81
00:04:53,167 --> 00:04:57,212
- Hello.
- Hello.
82
00:04:57,964 --> 00:05:00,382
I'm Alicia. I'm moving in upstairs.
83
00:05:00,591 --> 00:05:02,384
That is so great.
84
00:05:03,928 --> 00:05:06,054
Oh, I'm Leonard. I live downstairs.
85
00:05:06,264 --> 00:05:08,140
Upstairs from here, but under you.
86
00:05:08,349 --> 00:05:11,560
Not under you per se...
87
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,979
...but under your apartment. Heh-heh.
88
00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:17,316
- That's nice.
- Yeah, it is.
89
00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:22,279
Well, that concludes your faltering attempt
to mate.
90
00:05:24,949 --> 00:05:26,450
- Hello.
- Hello.
91
00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:28,243
Hello.
92
00:05:30,246 --> 00:05:33,749
On a scale of one to ten, how light
of foot would you describe yourself...
93
00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:38,754
...with one being not cat-like at all,
and ten being freakishly feline?
94
00:05:38,921 --> 00:05:40,672
Freakishly feline?
95
00:05:41,090 --> 00:05:43,759
Is that your answer
or do you not understand the question?
96
00:05:44,927 --> 00:05:46,678
- We'll come back to that one.
- Sheldon.
97
00:05:46,888 --> 00:05:52,934
Hang on. Are you now or have you ever
been a salsa, Irish-folk or breakdancer?
98
00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:55,645
- No.
- You're making her uncomfortable.
99
00:05:55,855 --> 00:05:57,314
Did...? Oh, I'm sorry.
100
00:05:57,523 --> 00:06:01,360
Well, if it helps you feel any better,
you're doing very well so far.
101
00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:04,154
Next question. Are you fertile?
102
00:06:05,156 --> 00:06:06,698
- What?
- I'm trying to determine...
103
00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:09,409
...whether crying infants are a possibility.
104
00:06:09,619 --> 00:06:13,747
- I have no immediate plans.
- If that changes, let me know.
105
00:06:13,956 --> 00:06:17,334
- And finally, area rugs, pro or con?
- Pro?
106
00:06:17,543 --> 00:06:18,752
- Alicia?
- Yes?
107
00:06:18,961 --> 00:06:20,170
Welcome to the building.
108
00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:32,182
Thanks so much for helping me, Leonard.
109
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:36,019
LEONARD: Thank you so much for
giving me the opportunity to help.
110
00:06:36,854 --> 00:06:38,522
Oh, hey, guys.
111
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:41,274
- Penny, this is Alicia, our new neighbor.
- Hi.
112
00:06:41,484 --> 00:06:42,526
Hi.
113
00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:44,611
I'm helping.
114
00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:46,822
I can see.
115
00:06:47,031 --> 00:06:50,992
Alicia's non-musical,
childless and pro-rug.
116
00:06:52,036 --> 00:06:55,455
She's still on probation, of course,
but I like her.
117
00:06:55,665 --> 00:06:56,873
Cool T-shirt.
118
00:06:57,083 --> 00:07:00,627
Oh, yeah, I don't usually dress like this.
I'm going jogging.
119
00:07:00,837 --> 00:07:03,505
- You don't jog.
- I can start.
120
00:07:04,006 --> 00:07:08,135
The more likely explanation for your attire
is that you're out of clean clothes again.
121
00:07:08,344 --> 00:07:10,595
- Thank you, Sheldon.
- You're welcome, Penny.
122
00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:15,016
Please, you look cute.
I'm dressed like a slob today too.
123
00:07:15,184 --> 00:07:16,309
Oh, ha, ha.
124
00:07:16,477 --> 00:07:19,020
LEONARD:
I think you look fantastic.
125
00:07:19,188 --> 00:07:23,859
- This one's a player, huh?
- Oh, yeah, be careful.
126
00:07:24,068 --> 00:07:25,485
- Thanks for the warning.
- Okay.
127
00:07:25,695 --> 00:07:27,904
- I'll see you around.
- See you.
128
00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:31,199
[KEYS JINGLING]
129
00:07:31,367 --> 00:07:33,535
[IN MOCKING VOICE]
"I'm dressed like a slob today too."
130
00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:35,537
Oh, mimicry.
131
00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:36,788
I enjoy mimicry.
132
00:07:36,998 --> 00:07:40,125
I've been working on Admiral Ackbar
from Return of the Jedi.
133
00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:43,378
[LOUDLY]
It's a trap.
134
00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,717
You have to imagine me
with a giant squid head.
135
00:07:54,557 --> 00:08:05,901
It's a trap.
136
00:08:27,632 --> 00:08:29,424
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
137
00:08:29,592 --> 00:08:31,218
Come.
138
00:08:31,552 --> 00:08:32,844
Hey.
139
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:35,430
Congratulations,
I see you did your laundry.
140
00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:37,098
Well, sort of.
141
00:08:37,266 --> 00:08:40,101
- How does one sort of...?
- I bought new clothes, okay?
142
00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:43,438
- Is Leonard around?
- He's upstairs at Alicia's.
143
00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:46,066
Oh, all right, that's cool, no biggie.
144
00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:49,444
He said he'd help me set up my printer,
but I guess I can wait.
145
00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,112
What exactly is he doing there?
146
00:08:51,572 --> 00:08:54,616
In what I can only perceive
as a tactical move to destroy me...
147
00:08:54,825 --> 00:08:58,286
...he is with Wolowitz and Koothrappali
setting up her stereo.
148
00:08:58,996 --> 00:09:01,790
Oh, they're all up there, huh?
Hmm. Typical.
149
00:09:03,125 --> 00:09:05,126
It's axiomatically atypical.
150
00:09:06,295 --> 00:09:10,590
Until recently, they did not know Alicia, and
had no encounters in a previous location.
151
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:13,009
They never went
to visit the former tenants.
152
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:17,639
So your characterization of their behavior
as typical is demonstrably fallacious.
153
00:09:20,309 --> 00:09:22,894
Okay, now I see the giant squid head.
154
00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:28,149
[DOOR OPENS THEN CLOSES]
155
00:09:30,027 --> 00:09:32,988
Oh, great.
Now I have to start all over again.
156
00:09:35,032 --> 00:09:37,158
Yeah, I thought about renting
this apartment...
157
00:09:37,368 --> 00:09:41,621
...but I'm really more of a downtown-loft
kind of guy.
158
00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:43,623
Cool. So are you in a loft now?
159
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:47,210
Oh, actually I'm living
with a woman in Altadena.
160
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:50,213
Purely platonic. She's also my maid. Heh.
161
00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:54,509
- Sounds like a sweet deal.
- Well, I won't lie. It's pretty dope.
162
00:09:56,679 --> 00:09:58,513
Hello?
163
00:09:59,223 --> 00:10:00,265
Oh, hey.
164
00:10:00,474 --> 00:10:02,809
Hi. I just wanted to bring you
a housewarming gift.
165
00:10:03,019 --> 00:10:04,394
That is so sweet.
166
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:06,563
- Come on in. Let's open it.
- Great.
167
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:10,734
- Nice dress.
- Oh, this? I'm dressed like a slob today.
168
00:10:12,528 --> 00:10:15,155
The guys have been helping me
set up my sound system.
169
00:10:15,364 --> 00:10:17,866
I've never had
such good-looking technical support.
170
00:10:18,993 --> 00:10:21,411
Oh, pish posh.
171
00:10:21,579 --> 00:10:22,621
[INAUDIBLE]
172
00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:25,874
I don't know. It means shucks.
173
00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:30,211
Shucks means shucks.
Let one go once in a while.
174
00:10:31,047 --> 00:10:33,089
Penny,
you wanna hear something awesome?
175
00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:36,092
- Yeah.
- Alicia is an actress just like you.
176
00:10:36,844 --> 00:10:39,262
That is so awesome.
177
00:10:40,556 --> 00:10:43,642
- Well, trying to be, but it's so hard.
- I know, tell me about it.
178
00:10:43,851 --> 00:10:47,062
I've been here three months.
All I've gotten is a couple commercials.
179
00:10:47,229 --> 00:10:49,230
And this recurring thing on a soap.
180
00:10:52,151 --> 00:10:56,404
That's why I work at The Cheesecake
Factory. I'm holding out for the right part.
181
00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:04,412
Alicia, what do you want as your default
setting for DVDs, 5. 1 Dolby or DTS?
182
00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:07,082
Whatever you think is best, cutie.
183
00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:08,792
[GIGGLES]
184
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,421
Well, DTS has more low-end...
185
00:11:14,799 --> 00:11:16,257
...so okay.
186
00:11:18,427 --> 00:11:22,931
Hey, guys, you will really appreciate this.
I read the best science joke on the Internet.
187
00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:25,850
Alicia, you won't get it,
but it's right up their alley.
188
00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:29,270
Anyway, so this physicist goes
into an ice cream parlor every week...
189
00:11:29,438 --> 00:11:31,439
...orders an ice cream sundae
for himself...
190
00:11:31,649 --> 00:11:33,942
...and offers one to the empty stool
next to him.
191
00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:36,945
This goes on until the owner
asks him what he's doing.
192
00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:39,489
The man says, "Well, I'm a physicist...
193
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:43,118
...and quantum mechanics teaches us...
194
00:11:44,161 --> 00:11:46,788
...that it is possible
for the matter above this stool...
195
00:11:46,997 --> 00:11:49,290
...to spontaneously turn
into a beautiful woman...
196
00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:51,835
...who might accept my offer
and fall in love."
197
00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:54,754
The owner then says,
"Lots of women come in here every day.
198
00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:58,258
Why don't you buy an ice cream for them,
and they might fall in love?"
199
00:11:58,467 --> 00:11:59,676
And the physicist says:
200
00:11:59,885 --> 00:12:02,971
"Yeah, but what are
the odds of that happening?" Ha.
201
00:12:08,060 --> 00:12:10,478
That's a little insulting, don't you think?
202
00:12:10,938 --> 00:12:13,815
How would I know?
I'm not even sure I get it.
203
00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:16,985
Hey, Leonard?
204
00:12:17,194 --> 00:12:20,155
If you're done with the DVD player,
can you set up my printer?
205
00:12:20,322 --> 00:12:21,656
Oh, yeah, I'd love to.
206
00:12:23,367 --> 00:12:25,994
When you're done with her printer,
you could set up mine.
207
00:12:26,203 --> 00:12:28,496
You know, like you promised,
a week ago?
208
00:12:28,706 --> 00:12:30,498
Yeah, I'll get to it. Don't nag me.
209
00:12:34,336 --> 00:12:36,337
Hello, there.
210
00:12:41,343 --> 00:12:43,344
[MUSIC PLAYS OVER TV]
211
00:12:47,057 --> 00:12:49,017
[MAN SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY
OVER TV]
212
00:12:52,396 --> 00:12:54,481
Who is it?
213
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:59,944
Oh, hello, Penny. It's open. Come in.
214
00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:04,365
Sarcasm.
215
00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:08,661
- Well, they're all still up there.
- You think I can't hear them?
216
00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:11,956
Listen to that. Stomp, stomp, stomp.
217
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:15,627
It's Wolowitz in his stacked heels
that fool no one.
218
00:13:16,879 --> 00:13:19,756
I don't even know why I care.
I don't care.
219
00:13:19,965 --> 00:13:23,760
All right, I cared enough to memorize
that stupid joke, but that's all I care.
220
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:25,929
You know, Penny...
221
00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:29,724
...there's something that occurs in beehives
you might find interesting.
222
00:13:29,892 --> 00:13:35,104
Occasionally, a new queen will arrive
while the old queen is still in power.
223
00:13:35,314 --> 00:13:39,400
When this happens, the old queen
must either locate to a new hive...
224
00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:45,573
...or engage in a battle to the death
until only one queen remains.
225
00:13:47,284 --> 00:13:49,911
What are you saying?
That I'm threatened by Alicia?
226
00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:53,873
That I'm like the old queen of the hive,
and it's just time for me to go?
227
00:13:54,083 --> 00:13:56,835
I'm just talking about bees.
228
00:13:57,044 --> 00:13:59,671
They're on The Discovery Channel.
229
00:14:00,548 --> 00:14:03,007
What are you talking about?
230
00:14:04,593 --> 00:14:06,010
Bees.
231
00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:10,014
[GASPS]
232
00:14:10,182 --> 00:14:12,851
I just got that physicist joke.
233
00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:18,648
- Gee, Penny, thanks for buying us dinner.
PENNY: Mm-hm.
234
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,733
- Yeah, what's the occasion?
- No occasion.
235
00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:24,195
Just felt like getting some Chinese chow
for my peeps.
236
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:28,700
Did you remember to ask for the chicken
to be diced not shredded?
237
00:14:28,909 --> 00:14:30,743
Even though the menu
specifies shredded?
238
00:14:30,953 --> 00:14:33,913
Brown rice, not white? Stop at the grocery
and get the mustard?
239
00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:36,499
Pick up the low-sodium soy sauce
from the market?
240
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:37,959
Good.
241
00:14:40,296 --> 00:14:41,588
See how it's done, Leonard?
242
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:46,259
What do we got going on tonight?
243
00:14:46,468 --> 00:14:50,638
Playing Halo? Watching Battlestar?
Drop some Mentos in Diet Coke?
244
00:14:51,807 --> 00:14:53,182
You wanna watch Battlestar?
245
00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:56,895
What can I say? I got my geek on, boys.
246
00:14:57,229 --> 00:14:58,813
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
247
00:14:59,189 --> 00:15:02,984
No, no, PMS is different.
248
00:15:04,945 --> 00:15:06,696
Thank God you're home. I need help.
249
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:09,449
- What's wrong?
- I got a callback to audition for CSI...
250
00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:13,661
- ...to play a hooker who gets killed.
- Oh, I'd watch that.
251
00:15:14,830 --> 00:15:18,499
But my car is in the shop
and I have to be at Universal in 45 minutes.
252
00:15:18,667 --> 00:15:21,836
- Okay, well, I'll take you.
ALICIA: Oh, you're a lifesaver.
253
00:15:22,004 --> 00:15:24,213
- I'll run lines with you in the car.
ALICIA: Great.
254
00:15:24,423 --> 00:15:27,050
And afterward,
I'll take you all out for Chinese.
255
00:15:27,259 --> 00:15:30,678
- Actually, that's okay. We already have...
LEONARD: I'm starving.
256
00:15:31,847 --> 00:15:32,889
[DOOR CLOSES]
257
00:15:33,057 --> 00:15:36,100
...Chinese food right here.
258
00:15:36,685 --> 00:15:39,270
They're gone, Penny.
They can't hear you.
259
00:15:41,190 --> 00:15:44,400
I cannot believe they're letting her
just use them like that.
260
00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:47,737
Anything she wants,
they go panting after her like trained dogs.
261
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:50,698
Just last week, she had Howard
drive to her uncle's house...
262
00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:52,867
...in Orange County to pick up her TV?
263
00:15:53,369 --> 00:15:57,455
You once had Leonard and me
get your television from your ex-boyfriend.
264
00:15:58,749 --> 00:16:01,125
Apples and oranges here, Sheldon.
265
00:16:02,211 --> 00:16:05,630
I'm telling you, that girl is a user,
skating through life on her looks...
266
00:16:05,839 --> 00:16:07,590
...taking advantage of innocent men...
267
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:10,426
...getting auditions
for stupid network shows.
268
00:16:10,636 --> 00:16:13,179
It just creams my corn.
269
00:16:15,516 --> 00:16:17,475
- May I interject something here?
- Please.
270
00:16:17,685 --> 00:16:19,310
You got the wrong mustard.
271
00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:25,817
- Hi.
- Hi.
272
00:16:26,026 --> 00:16:28,611
Guess what? I got the part on CSI.
273
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:31,114
Oh, boy.
274
00:16:32,032 --> 00:16:33,116
Something wrong?
275
00:16:33,325 --> 00:16:35,284
No, no, no.
You know what? Congratulations.
276
00:16:35,494 --> 00:16:38,287
I think you'll make a great hooker.
277
00:16:39,123 --> 00:16:40,331
Thank you.
278
00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:43,584
Hey, I gotta ask you something.
279
00:16:43,794 --> 00:16:45,753
How much do physicists make?
280
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,589
Um... Ah.
281
00:16:48,757 --> 00:16:50,842
I don't know. I don't think a lot.
282
00:16:51,051 --> 00:16:52,677
Yeah, that's what I figured.
283
00:16:55,264 --> 00:16:56,639
Well, gotta run.
284
00:16:56,849 --> 00:17:00,309
The guys promised to set up
my satellite dish and paint my bedroom.
285
00:17:00,477 --> 00:17:01,769
Yay.
286
00:17:02,312 --> 00:17:04,897
Hey. Hey, can I talk to you about that
for a second?
287
00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:06,190
About what?
288
00:17:06,942 --> 00:17:10,486
Well, you know,
it's just that Leonard and Howard and Raj...
289
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:12,238
...they aren't like other guys.
290
00:17:12,823 --> 00:17:14,115
They're special.
291
00:17:14,575 --> 00:17:17,285
Okay, they're special, and...?
292
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:20,872
Let's see. How can I explain this?
293
00:17:21,123 --> 00:17:24,542
- They don't know how to use their shields.
- Shields?
294
00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:28,546
Yeah, you know, like in Star Trek when
you're in battle and you raise the shields?
295
00:17:32,801 --> 00:17:35,136
Where the hell did that come from?
296
00:17:36,430 --> 00:17:39,432
Anyways,
you know how guys like this are.
297
00:17:40,392 --> 00:17:43,227
So please don't take advantage of them.
298
00:17:44,438 --> 00:17:47,065
Who says I'm taking advantage of them?
299
00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:51,736
Come on, they're doing everything for you
because you're leading them on.
300
00:17:51,945 --> 00:17:53,696
So I let them do stuff for me.
301
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:55,531
They're happy, I get stuff.
302
00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:58,659
Who cares? And how is it
any different from what you do?
303
00:18:01,288 --> 00:18:03,247
Excuse me?
304
00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:04,832
I've seen you around them.
305
00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:08,169
Are you pretending
like you don't do the exact same thing?
306
00:18:08,337 --> 00:18:12,507
Okay, lady, you are way out of line.
307
00:18:12,966 --> 00:18:16,552
- Oh, I'm out of line?
- Yeah, you're out of line.
308
00:18:16,762 --> 00:18:20,807
Well, what are you gonna do about it,
bitch?
309
00:18:24,269 --> 00:18:25,686
I like Green Lantern.
310
00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:30,024
I'm just saying it's pretty lame
that he can be defeated by the color yellow.
311
00:18:30,192 --> 00:18:33,486
Only the modern Green Lantern
is vulnerable to yellow.
312
00:18:33,695 --> 00:18:35,863
Golden-age Green Lantern
was vulnerable to wood.
313
00:18:36,073 --> 00:18:39,325
Great, so I can take them both out
with a number-two pencil?
314
00:18:39,493 --> 00:18:41,494
[PENNY AND ALICIA SCREAMING]
315
00:18:44,748 --> 00:18:48,709
Oh, my God. Girl fight!
316
00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:50,211
What are you doing?
317
00:18:50,420 --> 00:18:52,839
I know you.
You're stupid enough to break it up.
318
00:19:04,059 --> 00:19:07,103
May I say you look very comely tonight?
319
00:19:07,729 --> 00:19:09,397
Thank you.
320
00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:13,192
You're right. This filly's been broken.
321
00:19:14,319 --> 00:19:16,320
[MUFFLED DANCE MUSIC
PLAYING ON STEREO]
322
00:19:19,908 --> 00:19:22,743
You set it on DTS, didn't you?
323
00:19:22,911 --> 00:19:26,205
I had to. She called me cutie.
324
00:19:27,749 --> 00:19:29,584
According to Alicia's Facebook page...
325
00:19:29,793 --> 00:19:33,004
...she's hooking up
with one of the producers on CSI.
326
00:19:33,213 --> 00:19:37,049
Well, dead whore on TV,
live one in real life.
327
00:19:39,636 --> 00:19:41,470
[BED CREAKING]
328
00:19:45,767 --> 00:19:47,226
Oh, great.
329
00:19:47,769 --> 00:19:50,771
Now she's jumping up and down
on the bed.
330
00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:54,692
[MOUTHS]
Wow.
331
00:20:19,968 --> 00:20:21,969
[English - US - SDH]
26488
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