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1
00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:45,730
Good for you, Pete. Good for you.
2
00:01:21,170 --> 00:01:22,430
Access Hollywood spotlight
3
00:01:22,650 --> 00:01:25,350
on sexy crime fighter Sarah Marshall.
4
00:01:25,430 --> 00:01:28,040
Hi, everybody, welcome
to Access Hollywood. I'm Billy Bush.
5
00:01:28,170 --> 00:01:30,430
Each week, millions of
viewers love to watch
6
00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:33,700
Ms Marshall's brainy sexpot character,
Maddy Stark,
7
00:01:33,870 --> 00:01:36,830
alongside Billy Baldwin's
dark and brooding,
8
00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:39,090
hard-to-love lead detective, Hunter Rush.
9
00:01:39,220 --> 00:01:43,260
- And this isn't your jurisdiction.
- I just made it my jurisdiction.
10
00:01:43,700 --> 00:01:46,000
Can you say "catfight"?
11
00:01:47,660 --> 00:01:49,440
Off-screen, Sarah cosies up
12
00:01:49,530 --> 00:01:52,220
to her successful composer boyfriend,
Peter Bretter.
13
00:01:52,350 --> 00:01:53,480
He's no household name,
14
00:01:53,620 --> 00:01:58,920
yet Bretter's dark and ominous score has
set the tone for this gruesome juggernaut.
15
00:01:59,140 --> 00:02:00,490
Take a look.
16
00:02:04,140 --> 00:02:05,180
What do you think?
17
00:02:06,620 --> 00:02:10,400
I think it's gonna be hard
for her to re-enter the pageant
18
00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:12,880
without a face.
19
00:02:17,660 --> 00:02:20,930
Looks like the sky's the limit
for this adorable couple.
20
00:02:21,010 --> 00:02:23,100
Anything could happen.
21
00:02:25,620 --> 00:02:32,190
We got to do something
We got to do something
22
00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:34,970
Before Mother Earth gets any more hurt
23
00:02:35,100 --> 00:02:36,970
We got to do something
24
00:02:37,060 --> 00:02:40,630
We leave you tonight with the newest
smash single from Infant Sorrow.
25
00:02:40,850 --> 00:02:45,410
Lead singer and notorious lothario,
Aldous Snow, begs us to change
26
00:02:45,630 --> 00:02:48,670
in his environmental anthem,
We've Got to Do Something.
27
00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:52,500
I hope, for once, we all hear the message.
Good night.
28
00:02:52,630 --> 00:02:58,020
Mr Prime Minister and Mr President
You better see that it's not only me
29
00:02:58,150 --> 00:03:01,680
No, a mob is rising in size
And they've been dying to scream
30
00:03:04,590 --> 00:03:05,850
Hey, baby.
31
00:03:07,850 --> 00:03:09,290
Just working.
32
00:03:11,070 --> 00:03:12,200
Salad.
33
00:03:13,250 --> 00:03:16,510
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally.
34
00:03:16,590 --> 00:03:19,120
I didn't realise that
you were gonna be back so early.
35
00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:21,730
Great. I'll see you in a bit.
36
00:03:22,420 --> 00:03:24,860
Okay, bye.
37
00:03:25,470 --> 00:03:28,290
It's time to do something
38
00:03:28,380 --> 00:03:34,430
Someone should do something
We got to do something
39
00:03:34,510 --> 00:03:38,300
And that someone is you and you
And you and you
40
00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:42,250
I pray it ain't all lost and gone
41
00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:48,210
I pray we might learn right from wrong
42
00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:56,520
And I pray this broken day
will not last too long
43
00:04:05,390 --> 00:04:10,000
Hey, you got here fast.
I got a surprise for you.
44
00:04:13,650 --> 00:04:15,520
Peter, as you know,
45
00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:19,870
I love you very much.
46
00:04:24,260 --> 00:04:26,140
Are you breaking up with me?
47
00:04:32,180 --> 00:04:35,960
- Pete, are you...
- I just need a minute.
48
00:04:37,830 --> 00:04:38,880
Okay.
49
00:04:58,580 --> 00:04:59,620
Please don't go.
50
00:04:59,710 --> 00:05:02,620
Why don't you just put on some clothes,
and we can sit down and discuss this.
51
00:05:02,750 --> 00:05:04,020
No. I can't do anything right now.
52
00:05:04,100 --> 00:05:05,880
I'm so sorry, Pete.
53
00:05:06,710 --> 00:05:07,840
I'm in love with you.
54
00:05:07,970 --> 00:05:09,620
Why don't you just
put some clothes on, okay?
55
00:05:09,710 --> 00:05:11,410
I'm not going to go put clothes on.
56
00:05:11,630 --> 00:05:15,280
I know what that means,
if I put clothes on, it's over. Okay?
57
00:05:17,840 --> 00:05:18,890
Excuse me.
58
00:05:26,020 --> 00:05:28,800
Let's talk. Let's talk about him.
59
00:05:31,020 --> 00:05:32,240
I feel...
60
00:05:34,240 --> 00:05:36,110
I've been feeling
61
00:05:37,370 --> 00:05:40,290
for a long time
that we've been growing apart.
62
00:05:41,420 --> 00:05:43,720
We're leading different lives.
63
00:05:45,900 --> 00:05:47,460
Who's the dude?
64
00:05:48,850 --> 00:05:49,980
- Who's the dude?
- What?
65
00:05:50,070 --> 00:05:54,250
No, that's not what this is about.
There's no one else.
66
00:05:54,460 --> 00:05:56,640
I know what's happening here. I really do.
67
00:05:56,770 --> 00:06:00,200
You've been working so much lately, that we
haven't got to spend much time together,
68
00:06:00,290 --> 00:06:01,550
and you're forgetting
what it's like to be with me.
69
00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,860
But maybe, if we just held each other
or something,
70
00:06:03,940 --> 00:06:05,420
you would remember
what it's like to be with me.
71
00:06:05,640 --> 00:06:07,210
- No.
- Just hold me.
72
00:06:12,290 --> 00:06:14,600
Please. Here we go.
73
00:06:21,690 --> 00:06:23,560
There's someone else.
74
00:06:25,950 --> 00:06:27,300
I'm sorry.
75
00:06:45,040 --> 00:06:48,170
We don't hang out in places like this,
Liz and I.
76
00:06:49,220 --> 00:06:52,960
Why did you take me here?
This place smells like stripper's perfume.
77
00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:56,520
I'm gonna get herpes
just from sitting on this couch.
78
00:06:57,050 --> 00:06:59,520
- Sure you okay, bro? Yeah?
- Yeah.
79
00:06:59,660 --> 00:07:02,350
Yeah. You don't have to keep asking me.
I'm good.
80
00:07:02,440 --> 00:07:04,830
- You're out!
- Thank you so much for this opportunity.
81
00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:06,310
- Auf Wiedersehen!
- Auf Wiedersehen!
82
00:07:08,480 --> 00:07:10,270
MAN ON T. V..:
Thank you. Thank you all.
83
00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:11,530
Auf Wiedersehen!
84
00:07:13,700 --> 00:07:15,400
I feel really good. I feel happy.
85
00:07:15,570 --> 00:07:18,400
Maybe you should work
on the Dracula musical.
86
00:07:18,530 --> 00:07:21,840
Look, you've been working on it for a
while. It'll help your mind. Be creative.
87
00:07:21,970 --> 00:07:23,840
- Think about you.
- I think I need to fuck somebody.
88
00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:25,100
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
89
00:07:25,180 --> 00:07:28,180
You're not my stepbrother any more.
You're a step-stranger.
90
00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:29,880
- Why you talking like that?
- Brian!
91
00:07:29,970 --> 00:07:31,970
You don't need to put
your P in a V right now.
92
00:07:32,060 --> 00:07:36,540
No, I don't.
I need to B my L on somebody's T's.
93
00:07:36,670 --> 00:07:39,140
That's disgusting.
You don't need to be doing that.
94
00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,750
And if anything,
you should leave your P in the V
95
00:07:41,970 --> 00:07:45,540
and blow it inside the V,
so you can have a B-A-B-Y
96
00:07:45,620 --> 00:07:46,890
and be a normal person.
97
00:07:46,970 --> 00:07:48,760
I'm leaving, man. I'm out of here.
98
00:07:48,970 --> 00:07:52,710
She's fucking somebody.
Okay, Bri? It's all I can think about,
99
00:07:52,930 --> 00:07:54,190
is that she's out there,
100
00:07:54,280 --> 00:07:56,980
and until I do the same thing,
I'm gonna feel like I wanna die.
101
00:07:57,110 --> 00:08:01,060
So just talk to girls with me tonight,
all right?
102
00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:05,110
All right. All right, I'll help you out.
I'll talk to girls with you.
103
00:08:06,590 --> 00:08:08,460
So, Peter, what do you do?
104
00:08:08,670 --> 00:08:10,020
Musician.
105
00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:13,890
He's being modest.
He works on a show called Crime Scene.
106
00:08:15,110 --> 00:08:16,890
Oh, my God!
107
00:08:17,020 --> 00:08:19,810
- It is what it is, you know?
- No, I love that show.
108
00:08:19,940 --> 00:08:23,070
Wait, Crime Scene: Scene of the Crime
or Crime Scene: Phoenix?
109
00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:26,900
- Scene of the Crime.
- Oh, my God! I love that show.
110
00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:31,070
I find you both very sexually attractive.
111
00:08:32,770 --> 00:08:35,460
Let's pump the brakes. Okay?
112
00:08:35,550 --> 00:08:37,860
I think that having sex with either of you
113
00:08:37,940 --> 00:08:40,680
would be a great treat for me.
114
00:08:40,770 --> 00:08:42,470
You are so funny.
115
00:08:44,030 --> 00:08:46,420
I just got out of
a five-and-a-half-year relationship,
116
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:49,340
so I'm not looking for anything serious.
117
00:08:49,860 --> 00:08:53,730
- Just sexual activity.
- Let's wrap it up, buddy.
118
00:08:54,340 --> 00:08:56,120
You wanna come home?
119
00:08:57,860 --> 00:09:00,300
I'm sorry, you're cracking me up.
120
00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:02,170
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
121
00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:04,120
Do you wanna come home?
122
00:09:04,860 --> 00:09:06,520
Stop it, seriously.
123
00:09:12,690 --> 00:09:15,820
- That was fun.
- Yeah, yeah.
124
00:09:16,560 --> 00:09:19,350
Overall, I think that
went really well. Yeah.
125
00:09:29,260 --> 00:09:30,830
I want to have sex with you!
126
00:09:39,790 --> 00:09:42,400
- Are you crying?
- What? No.
127
00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:47,010
I'm sorry that I'm being so weird now.
128
00:09:47,310 --> 00:09:49,090
No, that's okay.
129
00:09:49,700 --> 00:09:51,350
You've been weird
130
00:09:52,310 --> 00:09:57,530
pretty much the whole time,
so it's not unusual. Okay.
131
00:09:58,050 --> 00:10:01,580
Last night, like some sort of idiot, I had
sex with this woman who I barely even know.
132
00:10:03,660 --> 00:10:05,880
I used a condom, but
133
00:10:07,010 --> 00:10:09,840
I'm really scared that I have an STD, Doc.
134
00:10:10,230 --> 00:10:12,530
Peter, I'm a paediatrician. Have you
noticed you're sitting on a fire truck?
135
00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:16,190
- Right.
- Little kids running?
136
00:10:16,270 --> 00:10:19,840
- Yeah, this is new. I like it.
- I'm kind of backed up...
137
00:10:20,060 --> 00:10:22,450
Could you take a look at my penis?
138
00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:26,320
Go ahead. Let me see it.
139
00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:29,020
- Sorry.
- That's all right. Take it out.
140
00:10:30,670 --> 00:10:31,710
Good.
141
00:10:32,370 --> 00:10:34,540
- You barely looked at it.
- It's a good-looking dick, Peter.
142
00:10:34,630 --> 00:10:36,320
- Beautiful dick.
- Do you think maybe while I'm here,
143
00:10:36,410 --> 00:10:38,410
- I could get some blood work?
- Peter!
144
00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:40,280
Your girlfriend dumped you, right?
Are you hurting? Are you hurt?
145
00:10:42,590 --> 00:10:46,760
Stop it. Stop crying. Use your dick.
Keep fucking. Fuck everything that moves.
146
00:10:47,070 --> 00:10:48,110
Just wear a condom.
147
00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:51,760
Listen, I'm backed up,
I got a lot of kids. I gotta go, okay?
148
00:10:51,850 --> 00:10:55,420
You want something?
You want a balloon? You want a lolly?
149
00:11:05,420 --> 00:11:06,770
I just came!
150
00:11:23,120 --> 00:11:24,160
Hi.
151
00:11:26,990 --> 00:11:28,030
Hi.
152
00:11:28,470 --> 00:11:30,730
- Hi.
- Hi.
153
00:11:30,950 --> 00:11:32,080
Hi.
154
00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:38,040
- Hi.
- Hi.
155
00:11:38,250 --> 00:11:43,990
Okay, do you mind not saying that
over and over again?
156
00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:46,470
You can gag me.
157
00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:53,170
- You brought a gag?
- And handcuffs.
158
00:11:54,740 --> 00:11:56,520
Do you wanna gag me?
159
00:11:57,350 --> 00:11:58,780
Kind of, now.
160
00:12:04,650 --> 00:12:06,390
What've we got today?
161
00:12:06,830 --> 00:12:08,780
Just a walk and talk at the lab.
162
00:12:11,090 --> 00:12:13,920
That's what 20 years on
Vice will do to you.
163
00:12:15,260 --> 00:12:16,610
What've we got here?
164
00:12:16,740 --> 00:12:19,740
The victim's penis was found
behind the AC unit.
165
00:12:20,270 --> 00:12:21,610
Ouch!
166
00:12:22,050 --> 00:12:24,220
Can you say "dicksicle"?
167
00:12:26,750 --> 00:12:28,310
Let's do this.
168
00:12:30,270 --> 00:12:31,830
Okay, I'm ready.
169
00:12:32,790 --> 00:12:35,920
The victim's penis
was found behind the AC unit.
170
00:12:39,570 --> 00:12:42,580
Just go with the usual stuff, maybe.
Something dark and ominous.
171
00:12:42,710 --> 00:12:45,320
Like losing your penis is a bad thing.
172
00:12:48,010 --> 00:12:50,320
Oh, you want dark and ominous.
173
00:12:50,930 --> 00:12:54,670
Come on, I got Allman Brother tickets,
I gotta get out of here!
174
00:12:55,620 --> 00:12:58,540
That's what 20 years on
Vice will do to you.
175
00:12:59,890 --> 00:13:01,750
What've we got here?
176
00:13:01,890 --> 00:13:04,060
Peter! Peter, Jesus Christ!
177
00:13:04,190 --> 00:13:06,970
You're fucking Billy Baldwin, aren't you?
178
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:09,500
- Aren't you?
- Pete, Pete, Pete.
179
00:13:09,710 --> 00:13:11,670
- Stop staring at me.
- Pete!
180
00:13:14,190 --> 00:13:16,800
You know you're not getting paid
for today's session, right?
181
00:13:16,980 --> 00:13:19,280
- I'm aware of that.
- Fucking asshole.
182
00:13:20,540 --> 00:13:22,630
Peter, it's Brian.
183
00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:25,020
Go away.
184
00:13:25,980 --> 00:13:28,370
Listen, your landlord called me.
185
00:13:28,460 --> 00:13:30,150
Said there's smoke
coming out of your place.
186
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:33,070
Who, Mr Lopez? 'Cause he's a liar!
187
00:13:33,760 --> 00:13:34,810
He doesn't...
188
00:13:35,020 --> 00:13:36,900
We worry about you, Petey.
189
00:13:37,030 --> 00:13:39,420
Yeah, come on, Peter. Open up the door.
190
00:13:39,500 --> 00:13:42,770
The fire marshal's gonna come in
and bust it down.
191
00:13:48,900 --> 00:13:50,770
You haven't been
out of the house in two weeks.
192
00:13:50,900 --> 00:13:51,940
Why are you so damn strong?
193
00:13:52,030 --> 00:13:54,640
I feel so strong!
194
00:13:55,070 --> 00:13:58,380
Hey, don't walk away from me.
You come close.
195
00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:01,820
Your place is disgusting, Peter.
196
00:14:02,030 --> 00:14:02,990
Hey, don't walk away from me.
197
00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:04,120
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey!
198
00:14:06,120 --> 00:14:07,860
What are you burning, man? Come on.
199
00:14:07,990 --> 00:14:09,030
It's everything.
200
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:11,860
It's everything that reminds me of her
and I need it gone!
201
00:14:11,950 --> 00:14:16,120
Okay, I thought I was fine, Brian,
and I'm not. I'm not fine at all.
202
00:14:16,340 --> 00:14:19,120
Okay, let's just put the picture down.
203
00:14:19,250 --> 00:14:22,170
Put that down. Let's discuss this.
204
00:14:22,260 --> 00:14:24,340
- I love her, man.
- I know.
205
00:14:24,560 --> 00:14:30,300
Look, Liz and I, we think
the world of Sarah.
206
00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:32,300
We think she's great.
207
00:14:32,820 --> 00:14:34,780
Okay, but everything...
208
00:14:35,300 --> 00:14:36,960
I'm just being honest here.
209
00:14:37,090 --> 00:14:40,300
Every time she would come over
to our house,
210
00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:43,220
she always acted,
211
00:14:44,390 --> 00:14:47,700
you know, like a little bitch!
212
00:14:48,870 --> 00:14:50,740
Okay, okay, pump the brakes.
213
00:14:50,830 --> 00:14:54,090
Dating Sarah is not like dating Liz. Okay?
214
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:56,180
Sarah is better than Liz.
215
00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:58,960
You really wanna have this conversation?
216
00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:02,610
Do you really
wanna have this conversation?
217
00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:05,010
Yes.
218
00:15:05,140 --> 00:15:07,010
- She is the mother of my unborn child.
- Sorry.
219
00:15:07,090 --> 00:15:08,490
You're my stepbrother.
We're not even blood.
220
00:15:10,140 --> 00:15:12,620
I have no qualms with sticking you.
I will equalize you.
221
00:15:12,750 --> 00:15:14,310
- Sorry.
- You dick!
222
00:15:14,700 --> 00:15:16,180
I'm just worked up.
223
00:15:17,010 --> 00:15:19,620
You gotta get your shit together, man.
224
00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:21,790
I'm trying to. It's so hard here.
225
00:15:23,490 --> 00:15:25,140
Brian, everywhere I look,
I'm reminded of her, okay?
226
00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:28,060
Like, she got me this,
227
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:31,840
okay, because I would always leave
my cereal boxes open,
228
00:15:32,010 --> 00:15:33,270
and the cereal would get stale,
229
00:15:33,490 --> 00:15:36,190
and so one day I came home,
and she had this waiting for me,
230
00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:40,490
because it keeps my cereal fresh.
And now I have the freshest cereal.
231
00:15:43,930 --> 00:15:45,580
Why don't you,
you know what, go on a vacation?
232
00:15:45,670 --> 00:15:47,370
Go to the Alps.
233
00:15:47,450 --> 00:15:50,370
- Alps?
- Go to Gstaad. It's the best.
234
00:15:50,500 --> 00:15:51,760
I could go to Hawaii.
235
00:15:51,850 --> 00:15:54,670
Sarah was always talking about this place
in Hawaii that was supposed to be nice.
236
00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:56,410
No, don't. I wouldn't go there.
237
00:15:56,540 --> 00:16:00,200
What, I can't go to Hawaii now, because
Sarah Marshall has heard of Hawaii?
238
00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:02,590
Then go to Hawaii. Go to Hawaii.
239
00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:04,240
Do it.
240
00:16:10,070 --> 00:16:12,070
No, no, no, don't destroy the computer.
241
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:13,420
I'm just deleting these pictures.
242
00:16:13,550 --> 00:16:16,030
Okay, I need them off my computer.
243
00:16:17,590 --> 00:16:20,810
You know what? You're not even doing
a proper permanent delete.
244
00:16:20,940 --> 00:16:22,200
Well...
245
00:16:22,290 --> 00:16:25,120
If we end up getting back together,
I wanna have a few of them left.
246
00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:26,250
You're crazy.
247
00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:29,380
- No, no, please don't delete them.
- They have to go. Done, done.
248
00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:46,250
That was hilarious. Aloha!
249
00:16:46,470 --> 00:16:49,510
I'm Sarah Marshall from Crime Scene:
Scene of the crime.
250
00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:52,210
And when I'm not scrubbing for evidence,
I'm flying Hawaiian Airlines...
251
00:16:52,430 --> 00:16:53,340
Excuse me! Hi.
252
00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:54,820
...to my favourite destinations. Mahalo.
253
00:16:54,910 --> 00:16:56,600
Hi, can I have another bloody mary, please?
254
00:16:58,170 --> 00:17:00,260
You're still working on that one.
255
00:17:00,340 --> 00:17:02,870
It's just an anticipatory order.
256
00:17:02,950 --> 00:17:04,950
Okay, I'll be right back!
257
00:17:16,830 --> 00:17:18,910
What do you think caused
such excessive bleeding?
258
00:17:19,130 --> 00:17:23,170
He was either stabbed in the aorta
or it was his time of the month.
259
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:36,140
Aloha!
260
00:17:37,270 --> 00:17:39,140
Check in this way.
261
00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:52,570
- Just married?
- Yes, how did you guess?
262
00:17:52,790 --> 00:17:56,440
Oh, you've got that magic newlywed dust
all over you.
263
00:17:57,400 --> 00:18:00,100
- Oh, my wife.
- Oh, my husband.
264
00:18:00,180 --> 00:18:01,880
- Oh, my wife.
- My husband.
265
00:18:01,970 --> 00:18:03,970
My old ball and chain.
266
00:18:08,230 --> 00:18:10,620
You quit squirming and come here.
267
00:18:11,450 --> 00:18:13,540
What is into you?
268
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:15,840
Not me, yet.
269
00:18:15,930 --> 00:18:20,020
Here is your room key.
So you're all set. Room 222.
270
00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:22,190
Room key's inside,
and the elevators are to the right.
271
00:18:22,410 --> 00:18:23,450
Mahalo.
272
00:18:23,540 --> 00:18:25,100
Congratulations.
273
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:29,800
Here you go, sir. Have some POG juice.
274
00:18:29,930 --> 00:18:31,890
Welcome to Turtle Bay.
What can I do for you?
275
00:18:32,020 --> 00:18:34,190
I'm checking in.
My name's Bretter, Peter Bretter,
276
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:35,330
but actually, I don't have a reservation.
277
00:18:37,110 --> 00:18:39,630
I just thought I'd take my chances.
278
00:18:40,980 --> 00:18:42,110
Bold!
279
00:18:42,850 --> 00:18:46,810
We are all booked up,
but we do have the Kapua suite available.
280
00:18:47,020 --> 00:18:49,720
- Okay. How much is that?
- $6,000 a night.
281
00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:52,850
- Wow.
- Beautiful views.
282
00:18:52,980 --> 00:18:54,940
I can imagine.
That's a little bit out of my price range.
283
00:18:55,030 --> 00:18:56,810
Sorry.
284
00:18:56,940 --> 00:18:59,330
That's a shame. This is a beautiful
285
00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:02,330
hotel.
286
00:19:03,290 --> 00:19:06,200
Oh, yeah, it's Sarah Marshall
from Crime Scene.
287
00:19:06,810 --> 00:19:08,600
People are excited that she's here.
288
00:19:10,290 --> 00:19:13,510
She's my ex-girlfriend.
We broke up three weeks ago.
289
00:19:13,600 --> 00:19:15,810
- I'm sorry, sir.
- Right. This is fine, right?
290
00:19:15,900 --> 00:19:18,820
- Sir?
- It's totally fine. Okay, there she is.
291
00:19:21,210 --> 00:19:24,120
- Did she see me? Is she coming over here?
- Uh-huh. Yup.
292
00:19:24,250 --> 00:19:25,900
I wish I wasn't wearing this fucking shirt.
293
00:19:26,030 --> 00:19:29,040
Fair enough.
Why don't you try to unbutton it?
294
00:19:30,690 --> 00:19:32,250
Button it back up.
295
00:19:33,650 --> 00:19:35,210
- Peter!
- Hey.
296
00:19:35,910 --> 00:19:37,990
- Hi.
- What are you doing here?
297
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:40,520
Came here to murder you.
298
00:19:41,130 --> 00:19:43,430
Really, what are you doing here?
299
00:19:44,260 --> 00:19:47,480
I have been having a tough time,
you know, back in LA.
300
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:50,610
But then I came here, and here you are.
301
00:19:51,130 --> 00:19:53,430
I just think that's too crazy to be...
302
00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:56,040
Hello there, you little sex object.
303
00:19:56,130 --> 00:19:58,870
I've lost a shoe.
Have you seen it anywhere?
304
00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:03,040
It's like this one, but, you know,
obviously it's the opposite one.
305
00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:09,700
Excuse me, missus, I've lost a shoe.
Like this one. It's like this one's fellow.
306
00:20:09,830 --> 00:20:12,920
- Sort of the exact opposite,
in fact, of that. Uh-huh.
307
00:20:13,050 --> 00:20:15,440
Not an evil version, but just, you know,
308
00:20:15,530 --> 00:20:19,700
a shoe like this, but for the other foot.
Otherwise, I'd have two right...
309
00:20:19,830 --> 00:20:21,270
Aldous, this is Peter.
310
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:25,230
Hey, all right, Peter.
Nice to meet you, mate. Aldous.
311
00:20:26,490 --> 00:20:28,700
- Good to meet you, man.
- My ex-boyfriend.
312
00:20:28,790 --> 00:20:30,880
Right. Hey, I'm Aldous Snow.
313
00:20:31,100 --> 00:20:33,360
I know who you are.
Yeah, you're very, very famous.
314
00:20:33,580 --> 00:20:35,440
Yeah, I am. I am for my sins.
315
00:20:35,660 --> 00:20:38,050
So are you staying here, as well?
316
00:20:38,190 --> 00:20:39,530
- I'm not, as a matter of fact...
- I'm sorry.
317
00:20:39,620 --> 00:20:42,140
Excuse me, Mr Bretter, Ms Marshall,
318
00:20:42,230 --> 00:20:46,400
but we were able to book the
Kapua suite for you, sir, for four nights.
319
00:20:49,230 --> 00:20:50,880
- You were?
- Yes, sir.
320
00:20:53,190 --> 00:20:55,190
- Marvellous.
- Perfect. Perfect amount of time.
321
00:20:55,280 --> 00:20:57,760
Listen, if you wanna have dinner with us
one of those nights...
322
00:20:57,890 --> 00:20:59,230
- Aldous.
...feel very...
323
00:20:59,320 --> 00:21:00,360
No.
324
00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:02,670
That's very gentlemanly of you,
but you two enjoy your trip.
325
00:21:02,890 --> 00:21:04,890
I'll be just fine on my own.
326
00:21:05,060 --> 00:21:07,580
- All right, Peter.
- The Kapua suite...
327
00:21:07,980 --> 00:21:11,460
- Have a good trip, Pete.
- I like your shirt. It's colourful.
328
00:21:11,540 --> 00:21:13,020
- Bye.
- Bye now.
329
00:21:13,410 --> 00:21:15,800
Ta-ta. I was wearing two shoes
this morning, right?
330
00:21:21,330 --> 00:21:23,720
Thank you. Thank you for bailing me out.
I still can't afford that room.
331
00:21:25,810 --> 00:21:28,110
Nobody can. It's for, like,
Oprah or, like, CĂ©line Dion.
332
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:29,460
Really, it's not a big deal.
333
00:21:29,590 --> 00:21:32,070
So you can stay in the suite,
but since you're not technically a guest,
334
00:21:32,290 --> 00:21:34,370
you have to clean up after yourself.
335
00:21:34,590 --> 00:21:37,070
Otherwise, here is your room key
336
00:21:38,110 --> 00:21:39,900
and enjoy your stay.
337
00:21:41,030 --> 00:21:43,250
Why are you doing this for me?
338
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:48,250
She's here with some guy already?
Kind of messed up.
339
00:21:48,770 --> 00:21:50,120
- Right?
- Yeah.
340
00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:53,340
- Thank you.
- Really, it's not a big deal.
341
00:21:53,470 --> 00:21:54,810
Go enjoy yourself.
342
00:21:54,900 --> 00:21:57,730
Rachel Jansen.
A thousand times, thank you,
343
00:21:57,950 --> 00:22:00,120
- you know what I mean...
- Go enjoy yourself.
344
00:22:00,340 --> 00:22:02,730
- This is a disaster!
Calm down, man.
345
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:04,820
Are there other hotels on the island?
346
00:22:04,950 --> 00:22:06,300
Of course there are other hotels,
347
00:22:06,380 --> 00:22:08,380
but I'm not leaving here,
it'll look like I'm running away.
348
00:22:08,470 --> 00:22:11,820
Wait. Why are you whispering?
You're not following them, are you?
349
00:22:11,910 --> 00:22:13,080
I had a girlfriend, right?
350
00:22:13,170 --> 00:22:17,210
And Liam and Noel Gallagher both had
it off with her right in front of me,
351
00:22:17,340 --> 00:22:18,690
so that's similar.
352
00:22:18,780 --> 00:22:20,260
And that was a bit awkward, actually.
353
00:22:20,470 --> 00:22:23,390
So if you do wanna change hotels,
I quite understand.
354
00:22:23,470 --> 00:22:26,000
No, no, I'm not changing hotels.
355
00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:28,300
Stop following
and just go back to your room, Peter.
356
00:22:28,390 --> 00:22:30,480
- They're gone!
- Why are you looking for them?
357
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:32,430
- I don't know.
- You're acting like an idiot.
358
00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:34,430
Run! Get out of there! Go to your room!
359
00:22:34,650 --> 00:22:36,610
- What do you think they're doing?
- Peter, go.
360
00:22:36,740 --> 00:22:38,610
Oh, God! Okay, there they are.
361
00:22:38,830 --> 00:22:40,480
- There they are, I see them.
- Go back to your room, Peter.
362
00:22:40,570 --> 00:22:42,130
Peter, go back to your room.
Go back to your room, Peter.
363
00:22:42,260 --> 00:22:43,310
I'm going in.
364
00:22:43,390 --> 00:22:45,090
Go back to your room, Peter.
Are you listening to me?
365
00:22:45,260 --> 00:22:47,350
Peter, go back to your room.
Peter, Peter, Peter...
366
00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:48,740
Hey!
367
00:22:50,090 --> 00:22:51,960
Hey, nice room.
368
00:22:52,180 --> 00:22:53,610
Go!
369
00:22:54,270 --> 00:22:56,220
I am in the Kapua suite.
370
00:22:56,350 --> 00:22:59,270
What are you doing? Sucker!
371
00:22:59,350 --> 00:23:00,490
Have fun.
372
00:23:02,050 --> 00:23:04,050
Listen, you piece of shit!
373
00:23:04,660 --> 00:23:08,840
You're an idiot. Back to your room, Peter.
Peter, back to your room.
374
00:23:10,920 --> 00:23:12,180
Did you enjoy that?
375
00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:14,880
- Did you like what you saw?
- That hurt a lot.
376
00:23:15,010 --> 00:23:18,010
But I know Sarah,
and I'm pretty sure I just ruined her day.
377
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:35,620
You know
how we thought the killer masturbated
378
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:37,930
before he committed each homicide?
379
00:23:38,060 --> 00:23:39,710
That's the theory.
380
00:23:39,930 --> 00:23:42,020
Take a look at the microscope.
381
00:23:44,410 --> 00:23:47,240
Oh, yeah, looks like where he's going,
382
00:23:48,450 --> 00:23:51,060
he'll need to know how to masturbate.
383
00:24:03,370 --> 00:24:04,420
Oh, God!
384
00:24:09,110 --> 00:24:10,980
- Hello.
Hey, Peter?
385
00:24:12,240 --> 00:24:14,330
- Sarah?
- No.
386
00:24:14,420 --> 00:24:17,680
It's Rachel Jansen, from the front desk.
387
00:24:19,850 --> 00:24:22,680
- Hey!
- Hey, what's going on up there?
388
00:24:22,770 --> 00:24:25,990
I'm getting complaints
about a woman crying hysterically.
389
00:24:26,120 --> 00:24:29,030
Yeah, you know what, I hear her, too,
390
00:24:29,120 --> 00:24:32,380
and it sounds like
she's having such a hard time.
391
00:24:32,470 --> 00:24:35,160
I think it's coming from
the floor above me.
392
00:24:35,380 --> 00:24:37,250
You're on the top floor.
393
00:24:39,250 --> 00:24:41,250
I'll try to keep it down.
394
00:24:41,860 --> 00:24:44,250
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, you have a nice night.
395
00:24:44,340 --> 00:24:45,510
Okay.
396
00:25:00,210 --> 00:25:04,390
I would love to sell you some weed, Jeremy,
but I'm at my fucking job right now.
397
00:25:04,610 --> 00:25:08,740
Obviously, because you called me at work,
you know that I'm at my place of work.
398
00:25:08,870 --> 00:25:10,830
So I can't just leave here
and sell you some weed.
399
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:13,260
I can sell you some weed when I'm done.
400
00:25:13,350 --> 00:25:16,910
Hold on, I gotta call you back.
Mahalo, all right.
401
00:25:17,090 --> 00:25:19,310
- Hey, how's it going?
- Hey.
402
00:25:19,390 --> 00:25:21,050
I'd just like to grab some dinner, please.
403
00:25:21,260 --> 00:25:24,180
- Okay, great. Is your wife gonna meet you?
- No.
404
00:25:25,130 --> 00:25:26,700
Your girlfriend?
405
00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:30,220
No, I don't have a girlfriend.
406
00:25:32,140 --> 00:25:34,830
- You're just by yourself?
- Yeah.
407
00:25:35,350 --> 00:25:36,620
Sucks.
408
00:25:36,700 --> 00:25:40,140
Okay, so just one. Here's your wine list
and your menu. Come on.
409
00:25:40,270 --> 00:25:41,700
Do you want, like, a magazine
or something?
410
00:25:41,830 --> 00:25:44,010
It's gonna be boring
if you're just sitting by yourself.
411
00:25:44,100 --> 00:25:45,270
I'll be all right. Thank you.
412
00:25:45,360 --> 00:25:47,660
I just would be so depressed.
413
00:25:47,750 --> 00:25:49,100
- Yeah.
- Here you go.
414
00:25:49,230 --> 00:25:50,270
Thank you.
415
00:25:51,180 --> 00:25:54,750
The best thing is,
you have the greatest table in the house.
416
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:57,060
- Oh, yeah?
- That's Aldous Snow right there.
417
00:25:57,140 --> 00:25:59,230
I know. I know, dude. I know.
418
00:25:59,530 --> 00:26:01,540
- I'm gonna ask him. I'll ask him politely.
- No, please don't, please.
419
00:26:02,750 --> 00:26:03,800
Mate!
420
00:26:05,060 --> 00:26:07,360
Why don't you come over and sit with us?
You'll be very welcome.
421
00:26:07,450 --> 00:26:10,710
No, thank you. I need a drink.
422
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:14,020
Would you guys like a drink?
423
00:26:14,150 --> 00:26:16,450
Well, no, actually, because...
424
00:26:16,760 --> 00:26:20,280
Seven years clean.
That's what this tattoo denotes.
425
00:26:20,410 --> 00:26:22,800
Seven years free from drugs and alcohol.
426
00:26:22,890 --> 00:26:25,110
If I have just one sip of wine,
427
00:26:25,190 --> 00:26:29,060
by the end of the evening, I'll be,
like, rimming waiters for their tips
428
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:30,410
just to get me hands on a rock.
429
00:26:30,500 --> 00:26:32,590
You know what I mean? Nasty.
430
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:36,460
I heard that.
- Hey, what's up, man?
431
00:26:36,850 --> 00:26:38,630
How are you enjoying
your vegetable medley?
432
00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:40,200
It's mundane.
433
00:26:40,850 --> 00:26:43,240
It is mundane. It's great, I know.
434
00:26:43,460 --> 00:26:44,980
Will you marry me?
435
00:26:45,420 --> 00:26:47,420
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yes!
436
00:26:47,500 --> 00:26:49,070
- She said yes!
- Beautiful.
437
00:26:49,900 --> 00:26:51,240
Congratulations!
438
00:26:54,370 --> 00:26:57,420
I'm so excited! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
439
00:26:58,330 --> 00:26:59,510
Peter!
440
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:03,460
What's up?
441
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:06,160
- Are you doing okay?
- Yeah.
442
00:27:06,380 --> 00:27:07,940
Yeah, I'm good.
443
00:27:09,080 --> 00:27:12,950
Look, did you follow me here?
Did my assistant tell you I was coming?
444
00:27:13,030 --> 00:27:14,420
- No.
- Did you talk to her?
445
00:27:14,510 --> 00:27:18,690
No, I didn't talk to your assistant.
It's not all about you, you know.
446
00:27:18,900 --> 00:27:23,470
Hawaii is a beautiful place. People
come here, usually not to follow you.
447
00:27:23,900 --> 00:27:26,600
So you're really staying?
You're gonna stay?
448
00:27:26,730 --> 00:27:30,470
Yeah, I think so. I really like it here.
I feel at home here.
449
00:27:30,780 --> 00:27:32,250
I just love it.
450
00:27:33,470 --> 00:27:35,040
Yeah, you should stay.
451
00:27:35,170 --> 00:27:37,430
I appreciate your consideration.
452
00:27:37,780 --> 00:27:40,390
Sounds like Aldous probably
shared a lot of needles,
453
00:27:40,470 --> 00:27:42,870
so thank you for dating him after me.
454
00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:44,650
- I appreciate that.
- Hmm.
455
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:49,960
- Hope you have a really good time here.
- Have a great dinner.
456
00:27:50,090 --> 00:27:51,300
Thank you.
457
00:27:52,570 --> 00:27:54,040
Groupie whore.
458
00:27:54,570 --> 00:27:56,000
Psycho stalker.
459
00:27:56,650 --> 00:28:01,220
You know what? It's vacation. I think
I'll just take a piña colada, please.
460
00:28:09,270 --> 00:28:10,920
Look at this guy.
461
00:28:11,140 --> 00:28:13,740
Look at this guy.
462
00:28:15,620 --> 00:28:18,530
Not us, buddy. Right? Not us.
463
00:28:18,750 --> 00:28:22,490
I'm on Sex and the City.
What's up, Miranda?
464
00:28:23,530 --> 00:28:27,620
I'm Samantha. I have sex with everyone.
465
00:28:27,700 --> 00:28:29,710
Maybe it's a good thing that they're here.
466
00:28:29,790 --> 00:28:32,710
You know what I mean?
Maybe this is a challenge from God
467
00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:34,790
for me to forget her. You know?
468
00:28:35,010 --> 00:28:39,190
Or maybe it's a sign from God
that you should be with her.
469
00:28:40,100 --> 00:28:41,800
I love her show.
470
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:45,620
When they mix the sexuality
and the violence, I like it.
471
00:28:45,750 --> 00:28:48,060
What the hell is wrong with you two?
You gotta move on.
472
00:28:48,150 --> 00:28:50,320
I hear you say that, but
it's not that easy.
473
00:28:50,450 --> 00:28:52,620
It's that easy. Promise you it is.
474
00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:54,410
I lived in South Central.
475
00:28:54,630 --> 00:28:57,320
South Central. And I hated it.
476
00:28:57,410 --> 00:28:58,670
That's why I moved to Oahu.
477
00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:01,060
Now I can name you
over 200 different kinds of fish.
478
00:29:01,190 --> 00:29:02,760
- No, you can't.
- Oh, yes, I can.
479
00:29:02,930 --> 00:29:04,320
- Do it.
- Yeah, you cannot.
480
00:29:04,410 --> 00:29:09,410
G. Ghost pipefish, grill fish, goaler fish
grouper fish, greenback...
481
00:29:09,630 --> 00:29:11,280
What's the state fish of Hawaii?
482
00:29:11,410 --> 00:29:12,980
Humuhumunukunukuapua'a.
483
00:29:13,150 --> 00:29:14,850
- Yeah, bitch.
- Hey.
484
00:29:15,590 --> 00:29:18,200
- You ready?
- Yeah, just gonna close up.
485
00:29:21,110 --> 00:29:24,940
Hello, Mr Bretter, Mr Brayden.
Where's your wife, sir?
486
00:29:25,460 --> 00:29:27,770
She is in bed.
487
00:29:27,900 --> 00:29:29,850
How are things going with the lady?
488
00:29:29,940 --> 00:29:34,110
Not awesome.
She's complicated, like The Da Vinci Code,
489
00:29:34,980 --> 00:29:37,770
you know, but harder to crack.
490
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:42,990
But life is full of lessons.
You learn something new every day.
491
00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:47,380
Wonder what I'm going to learn tomorrow.
492
00:29:48,810 --> 00:29:49,990
Well.
493
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:51,950
- Good night, sir.
- Good night.
494
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:53,210
Good night, sir.
495
00:29:53,340 --> 00:29:56,030
Off to find the mythical clitoris.
496
00:29:57,300 --> 00:30:02,600
So, Peter, were you able to get
that crying lady out of your room?
497
00:30:03,860 --> 00:30:05,300
'Cause I could send someone up,
if you want.
498
00:30:05,430 --> 00:30:07,170
- Oh, you could?
- Yeah.
499
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:10,730
That's very funny. It is.
500
00:30:11,860 --> 00:30:16,040
Well, listen, Sarah Marshall Show sucks.
Who cares?
501
00:30:16,170 --> 00:30:18,780
I do the music for that programme.
502
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:22,520
Did I mention that the music rocks?
503
00:30:24,080 --> 00:30:27,740
That's very sweet of you.
That's very sweet of you to say.
504
00:30:27,830 --> 00:30:29,910
You don't have to say that, though.
It's not music.
505
00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:32,610
There's no melody, it's just tones.
506
00:30:32,740 --> 00:30:34,830
Just dark, ominous tones.
507
00:30:36,610 --> 00:30:39,700
"The masturbating dog killer
is on the loose again.
508
00:30:39,830 --> 00:30:42,520
"He'll kill the owner,
but at least the dogs are happy."
509
00:30:49,530 --> 00:30:52,140
I'm no Aldous Snow, I guess, you know.
510
00:30:57,010 --> 00:30:59,750
Time to start the music
511
00:31:00,140 --> 00:31:02,050
All gonna light the light
512
00:31:02,660 --> 00:31:06,620
Yeah, yeah, gonna get things started
on The Muppet Show tonight
513
00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:16,930
- Whipped cream or berry?
- Whipped cream.
514
00:31:18,710 --> 00:31:21,930
Here we are, sir. Have
a wonderful breakfast.
515
00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:24,750
What a lovely table, so
close to the buffet.
516
00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:27,280
I'm glad you like it. Mahalo.
517
00:31:31,230 --> 00:31:33,020
Good morning, sir.
Can I start you with anything?
518
00:31:33,100 --> 00:31:34,370
Orange juice, coffee?
519
00:31:34,450 --> 00:31:37,890
What about, like, some pineapple juice
with a little bit of rum on the side.
520
00:31:38,020 --> 00:31:41,850
Of course. I like your style. Cocktail guy.
521
00:31:42,060 --> 00:31:43,930
- Thank you.
- You are welcome.
522
00:31:44,150 --> 00:31:46,020
We've already reserved
the sea kayak for noon.
523
00:31:46,150 --> 00:31:49,060
Honey, I know that,
but you know that I wanted to see...
524
00:31:49,150 --> 00:31:52,720
- Hey. Hello there, friend.
- Hey.
525
00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:55,200
How are you guys? How was your evening?
526
00:31:55,330 --> 00:31:56,680
- Great.
- Awesome.
527
00:31:56,980 --> 00:31:59,500
- I can't feel anything.
- All right.
528
00:32:00,020 --> 00:32:02,420
- Does that feel good?
- I still can't feel anything.
529
00:32:02,500 --> 00:32:04,720
Okay, 'cause it hurts me.
530
00:32:04,810 --> 00:32:07,640
- Would you do that for me?
- Yeah.
531
00:32:08,550 --> 00:32:12,330
- Yeah.
- No, no, no. No.
532
00:32:12,850 --> 00:32:15,770
God put our mouths on our head
for a reason. No!
533
00:32:18,250 --> 00:32:20,640
- I'm going to the bathroom.
- Okay.
534
00:32:21,680 --> 00:32:26,600
- Is everything okay with...
- Waffles.
535
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:33,470
- Here you go, sir. Breakfast of champions.
- Oh, thank you.
536
00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:38,170
And don't tell anybody, but...
A little extra love for you.
537
00:32:39,950 --> 00:32:41,080
Thank you.
538
00:32:41,210 --> 00:32:43,600
- Take it easy.
- You, too.
539
00:32:56,210 --> 00:32:58,000
- Hi.
- Hi.
540
00:32:58,170 --> 00:32:59,560
This is the yoga place, yeah?
541
00:32:59,650 --> 00:33:03,000
Yes. But there's no alcohol allowed
in the studio.
542
00:33:03,740 --> 00:33:07,870
Oh, no, I mean, obviously.
This is just pineapple juice.
543
00:33:09,130 --> 00:33:12,570
Well, there's no outside drinks
allowed in the studio.
544
00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:14,870
- Can I set it down?
- Sure.
545
00:33:15,090 --> 00:33:17,260
- Cool, thank you.
- I like your hat.
546
00:33:17,390 --> 00:33:20,520
- Thank you.
- Please remove it before class.
547
00:33:23,220 --> 00:33:26,350
Hey, everyone,
why don't you all grab your mats?
548
00:33:28,310 --> 00:33:32,480
Sorry, I recognise you from the cover
of Namaste Magazine. I'm a huge fan.
549
00:33:32,790 --> 00:33:35,010
Thank you. That's so sweet of you to say.
550
00:33:35,220 --> 00:33:38,880
I appreciate that.
Obviously, I don't do yoga for recognition.
551
00:33:39,050 --> 00:33:42,920
Right, of course you wouldn't.
Then stop being so good at it.
552
00:33:44,790 --> 00:33:47,310
That's very flexible. That's nice.
553
00:33:49,490 --> 00:33:52,710
- And, you, I recognise you from your show.
- Thank you.
554
00:33:52,840 --> 00:33:55,230
You seem much taller on your show.
555
00:33:56,190 --> 00:33:58,360
- I'm not.
- No, I know.
556
00:34:00,540 --> 00:34:03,880
Okay, if you just wanna start
by bringing your palms into your chest.
557
00:34:04,100 --> 00:34:07,840
Today we're gonna start with
the Surya Namaskar, or Sun Salutation.
558
00:34:07,930 --> 00:34:10,150
Let's take a deep inale in.
559
00:34:10,670 --> 00:34:12,760
Exhale and release the hands.
560
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:15,670
Inale, arms up to the sky. Continue.
561
00:34:16,710 --> 00:34:19,630
Good, exhale and folding forward.
562
00:34:20,370 --> 00:34:24,540
Strong, strong backs. Good, excellent.
563
00:34:24,630 --> 00:34:26,410
Remember this is not a competition,
564
00:34:26,630 --> 00:34:28,890
although you two seem
to be the best in the class.
565
00:34:29,110 --> 00:34:31,500
Excellent. Perfect form, you two, perfect.
566
00:34:31,630 --> 00:34:34,330
Coming up into downward-facing dog.
567
00:34:34,940 --> 00:34:37,150
Good. It's really important in this pose,
568
00:34:37,370 --> 00:34:40,590
that you arch your back
and keep it flat at the same time.
569
00:34:40,680 --> 00:34:43,200
I feel like those are opposing ideas.
570
00:34:43,420 --> 00:34:47,590
No, they're not, 'cause you're arching
your back up while it's flat.
571
00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:48,810
Okay.
572
00:34:51,330 --> 00:34:55,510
Good, yeah, sweat it out.
Sweat out all the toxins from this morning.
573
00:34:55,810 --> 00:34:57,990
- Come on, lady.
- My name is Prana,
574
00:34:58,120 --> 00:35:00,380
and I know that wasn't just juice.
575
00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:05,080
You don't really need any adjusting,
so I'm just gonna do this for myself.
576
00:35:05,730 --> 00:35:07,810
Just to learn from your body,
577
00:35:08,120 --> 00:35:09,770
memorize your body.
578
00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:13,210
- Good. Strong legs.
- Come on.
579
00:35:14,160 --> 00:35:16,170
Perfect skin and form.
580
00:35:17,080 --> 00:35:20,120
Okay, class, I'd like to now
move into a tripod headstand.
581
00:35:20,300 --> 00:35:21,990
This is more of an advanced pose,
582
00:35:22,210 --> 00:35:24,910
so if you don't feel comfortable
or strong enough,
583
00:35:24,990 --> 00:35:28,780
please feel free to just lay on your mat
in child's pose.
584
00:35:28,860 --> 00:35:30,130
I got it.
585
00:35:30,340 --> 00:35:33,340
All right, so let's all
come down to our mats.
586
00:35:33,560 --> 00:35:36,690
Get in a prep position
for the tripod headstand.
587
00:35:36,780 --> 00:35:37,820
If you don't feel comfortable,
588
00:35:38,040 --> 00:35:41,170
there's no shame
in just laying on your mat in child's pose.
589
00:35:41,260 --> 00:35:42,740
Lady, I got it.
590
00:35:42,830 --> 00:35:45,740
Good, so let's prep to come up. Good.
591
00:35:47,220 --> 00:35:50,260
Sir, if you just want to lay down
in child's pose.
592
00:35:50,350 --> 00:35:51,390
Now, you all heard me say,
593
00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:54,520
"If you want to be in child's pose,
that's okay."
594
00:35:54,610 --> 00:35:56,700
- Just in case he gets hurt.
- Bring it, bring it.
595
00:35:56,830 --> 00:35:59,000
I don't want you to break your neck.
596
00:35:59,220 --> 00:36:00,660
- What's up?
- Just relax.
597
00:36:00,870 --> 00:36:02,740
My legs, that's what.
598
00:36:02,870 --> 00:36:05,050
We're doing quiet headstands today.
599
00:36:05,140 --> 00:36:08,090
I'm doing a handstand, motherfucker!
I'm doing a handstand.
600
00:36:08,180 --> 00:36:09,830
Okay, you know, why don't we just release.
601
00:36:09,960 --> 00:36:11,180
Thank God.
602
00:36:11,620 --> 00:36:14,140
Good, everybody. Good.
603
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:19,530
Hey.
604
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:21,310
Are you Chuck?
605
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,750
Oh, man, you know,
they won't change that flyer.
606
00:36:25,050 --> 00:36:28,400
That's my mainland name.
My Hawaiian name is Koonu.
607
00:36:28,840 --> 00:36:30,060
Cool, sorry.
608
00:36:30,270 --> 00:36:31,450
No, it's all good.
609
00:36:31,530 --> 00:36:34,580
Does Koonu have some, like,
cool Hawaiian meaning?
610
00:36:34,670 --> 00:36:36,540
It means Chuck.
611
00:36:36,620 --> 00:36:38,100
I plugged it into a database.
612
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:41,450
There's a thing you can go on, on the
Internet, you just type in your name,
613
00:36:41,670 --> 00:36:42,710
and it just says it.
614
00:36:44,750 --> 00:36:45,710
What's your name?
615
00:36:45,930 --> 00:36:47,060
- I'm Peter.
- Peter.
616
00:36:47,280 --> 00:36:48,840
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna give you a Hawaiian name.
617
00:36:48,930 --> 00:36:50,190
Oh, great.
618
00:36:53,760 --> 00:36:55,110
Pepiopi.
619
00:36:57,410 --> 00:36:59,590
- Great.
- Pepiopi, looks like you've got a little pain
620
00:36:59,800 --> 00:37:01,540
behind those eyes.
621
00:37:03,110 --> 00:37:04,890
Yeah, maybe a little.
622
00:37:05,720 --> 00:37:07,800
There's really only one cure for that.
623
00:37:07,940 --> 00:37:08,980
What's that?
624
00:37:09,070 --> 00:37:10,720
Weed. You got any?
625
00:37:13,020 --> 00:37:15,420
- No.
- Well, then let's go surfing.
626
00:37:18,550 --> 00:37:21,680
Okay, when we're out there,
I want you to ignore your instincts.
627
00:37:21,900 --> 00:37:24,940
I'm gonna be your instincts.
Koonu will be your instincts.
628
00:37:25,110 --> 00:37:26,510
Don't do anything.
629
00:37:26,590 --> 00:37:28,980
Don't try to surf, don't do it.
630
00:37:29,940 --> 00:37:32,120
The less you do, the more you do.
631
00:37:32,330 --> 00:37:34,640
Let's see you pop up. Pop it up!
632
00:37:38,680 --> 00:37:39,810
That's not it at all.
633
00:37:39,940 --> 00:37:41,380
Do less. Get down. Try less. Do it again.
634
00:37:43,680 --> 00:37:44,820
Pop up.
635
00:37:45,550 --> 00:37:47,250
No, too slow. Do less.
636
00:37:47,340 --> 00:37:48,470
Pop up.
637
00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:50,160
Pop up.
638
00:37:50,250 --> 00:37:52,560
You're doing too much. Do less. Pop down.
639
00:37:52,640 --> 00:37:53,820
Pop up now.
640
00:37:53,990 --> 00:37:55,250
Stop! Get down. Get down there.
641
00:37:55,470 --> 00:37:57,560
Remember, don't do anything.
642
00:37:58,300 --> 00:37:59,860
Nothing. Pop up.
643
00:38:02,560 --> 00:38:04,120
Well, you... No, you
gotta do more than that,
644
00:38:04,210 --> 00:38:05,390
'cause you're just laying right out.
645
00:38:05,470 --> 00:38:06,520
It looks like you're boogie-boarding.
646
00:38:06,650 --> 00:38:08,730
Just do it. Feel it. Pop up.
647
00:38:10,390 --> 00:38:13,300
Yeah. That wasn't quite it,
but we're gonna figure it out, out there.
648
00:38:13,390 --> 00:38:14,430
Let's go surfing, come on.
649
00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:16,520
Everybody's learning how, come on and...
650
00:38:16,650 --> 00:38:18,950
The weather outside is weather
651
00:38:20,610 --> 00:38:22,700
How long you lived out here?
652
00:38:22,780 --> 00:38:25,700
Man, I don't know. I quit wearing a watch
when I moved out here.
653
00:38:25,830 --> 00:38:28,220
- Wow, that's so cool.
- Yeah.
654
00:38:28,300 --> 00:38:32,390
No, like my cell phone has a clock on it,
so I don't really need it.
655
00:38:32,480 --> 00:38:35,220
Right, so it's basically the same thing.
656
00:38:35,830 --> 00:38:39,050
- How old are you?
- I don't really believe in age or numbers,
657
00:38:39,180 --> 00:38:41,960
you know, I don't...
I mean, if you had to put a number on it,
658
00:38:42,090 --> 00:38:44,480
I guess I'd be 44.
659
00:38:46,880 --> 00:38:48,010
Fuck!
660
00:38:48,750 --> 00:38:51,050
Thanks for taking me out here.
661
00:38:52,180 --> 00:38:55,090
This is the first time I've felt good
in three weeks or so.
662
00:38:55,310 --> 00:38:57,920
You need to get back on that board
is what you need to do.
663
00:38:58,050 --> 00:38:59,920
- Yeah?
- Hey, here's the deal.
664
00:39:00,010 --> 00:39:01,360
When life gives you lemons,
665
00:39:01,580 --> 00:39:03,750
just say, "Fuck the lemons," and bail.
666
00:39:03,880 --> 00:39:06,580
Yeah. No. You said it, totally.
667
00:39:06,710 --> 00:39:08,660
You gotta just pull yourself up
by your wetsuit,
668
00:39:08,880 --> 00:39:09,840
get back on that board...
669
00:39:10,010 --> 00:39:11,490
Hey, look, man,
if you're attacked by a shark,
670
00:39:11,710 --> 00:39:13,140
are you gonna give up surfing?
671
00:39:13,270 --> 00:39:14,930
Probably, yeah.
672
00:39:15,010 --> 00:39:17,750
Let's go in, all right. Tacos are on me.
673
00:39:18,490 --> 00:39:20,750
Can you try to listen
to what I'm saying to you, Brian?
674
00:39:20,970 --> 00:39:23,490
I'm confused and I don't know what to do.
675
00:39:23,580 --> 00:39:24,840
What's up with that hat?
676
00:39:25,060 --> 00:39:27,670
What are you
in the Buena Vista Social Club?
677
00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:28,890
This is a nice hat.
678
00:39:29,020 --> 00:39:31,710
What member of the Brat Pack are you?
679
00:39:31,930 --> 00:39:34,850
You look like one of those guys
suspected of killing JFK.
680
00:39:34,930 --> 00:39:37,240
That's very funny. That's great.
681
00:39:37,320 --> 00:39:39,320
Tell him to make friends.
682
00:39:39,630 --> 00:39:41,930
You need to get out there
and make some friends, man.
683
00:39:42,150 --> 00:39:43,590
Is Liz there right now?
684
00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:45,890
No, no, she's not in here, buddy.
685
00:39:45,980 --> 00:39:47,020
I just heard her.
686
00:39:47,240 --> 00:39:48,590
She's gone.
687
00:39:49,240 --> 00:39:51,110
Who are you looking at?
688
00:39:51,330 --> 00:39:52,370
What?
689
00:39:52,460 --> 00:39:54,150
Is she still... Hi, Liz.
690
00:39:54,240 --> 00:39:58,110
No. I swear on my mother's grave, it...
Okay, it was Liz.
691
00:39:58,420 --> 00:40:00,370
She wasn't here the entire time.
692
00:40:00,500 --> 00:40:02,680
Go out and meet people.
We meet people all the time...
693
00:40:02,810 --> 00:40:04,240
- All the time on vacation.
- Constantly.
694
00:40:04,330 --> 00:40:07,290
I've tried, all right,
there's a couple of dudes here,
695
00:40:07,460 --> 00:40:09,550
but they're kind of weird.
696
00:40:09,900 --> 00:40:11,770
Just be friendly.
697
00:40:11,860 --> 00:40:12,990
Iron your shirt.
698
00:40:13,120 --> 00:40:14,460
Iron your shirt, look sharp.
699
00:40:14,680 --> 00:40:16,250
Even your T-shirts.
700
00:40:16,770 --> 00:40:19,380
There is this girl at the front desk
who's pretty cute.
701
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:22,900
Oh, yeah. You know what?
Go have another dirty one night stand.
702
00:40:23,030 --> 00:40:24,770
That worked out so well before.
703
00:40:24,900 --> 00:40:27,820
What do you want from me?
You just told me I need to meet people.
704
00:40:27,900 --> 00:40:30,430
Ask her out.
Maybe that's what he needs, is a rebound.
705
00:40:30,510 --> 00:40:32,380
He's had plenty of chances
for rebounds. This isn't...
706
00:40:32,600 --> 00:40:33,640
Can we get on the same team here?
707
00:40:33,860 --> 00:40:36,910
Okay, I'm sorry.
We're on the same team. Sorry.
708
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:39,910
You should go on a date with this girl.
709
00:40:39,990 --> 00:40:41,260
Well, maybe I'll ask her out then.
710
00:40:41,470 --> 00:40:43,340
- Yes.
- My wife says so.
711
00:40:43,780 --> 00:40:46,600
- Hey, I'm in Hawaii, too!
Oh, that's neat.
712
00:40:47,000 --> 00:40:48,780
Aloha, bitches!
713
00:40:49,820 --> 00:40:51,390
That's very cool.
714
00:40:54,610 --> 00:40:57,130
They're not Native Americans, Brian.
715
00:40:59,520 --> 00:41:00,650
- Bri...
- What are you doing?
716
00:41:00,870 --> 00:41:02,870
- The luha. Is that right?
- Oh, yeah.
717
00:41:03,170 --> 00:41:04,300
It's called the hula.
718
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:06,180
- Luau?
- No, hula.
719
00:41:06,390 --> 00:41:07,350
You're doing a luau?
720
00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:22,960
- Hey.
- Hey.
721
00:41:23,090 --> 00:41:24,220
- Peter.
- Wow.
722
00:41:25,790 --> 00:41:28,830
You look beautiful.
I mean, that's a beautiful dress.
723
00:41:29,010 --> 00:41:29,960
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
724
00:41:30,180 --> 00:41:31,400
This'll be fun.
725
00:41:31,620 --> 00:41:32,790
Lei?
726
00:41:37,490 --> 00:41:40,180
May I help you with something else, Peter?
727
00:41:40,490 --> 00:41:42,490
No, I'll just grab a drink.
I'm just gonna head inside.
728
00:41:42,580 --> 00:41:44,970
- Happy 4th of July!
- Thank you.
729
00:41:47,360 --> 00:41:48,320
Aloha!
730
00:42:02,190 --> 00:42:04,060
- You done here?
- No, actually, I just sat down,
731
00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:06,020
I'm just getting started.
It's delicious, though, thank you.
732
00:42:06,230 --> 00:42:08,230
I'll just go fuck myself.
733
00:42:08,320 --> 00:42:10,110
- Sorry, what?
- Mahalo.
734
00:42:13,150 --> 00:42:14,370
Hi, Peter.
735
00:42:16,240 --> 00:42:17,800
Hey. Hey, bro.
736
00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:21,280
- Hi.
- Hey, all right.
737
00:42:21,460 --> 00:42:23,240
Excuse me. Excuse me.
738
00:42:23,330 --> 00:42:26,460
Everybody, can I have your attention
for one second, please.
739
00:42:26,590 --> 00:42:29,500
We have a very special guest
with us here, today.
740
00:42:29,590 --> 00:42:33,760
He is the lead singer
of the band, Infant Sorrow,
741
00:42:34,590 --> 00:42:38,160
one of my favourite musicians of all time.
He's so awesome.
742
00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:41,370
Please, please, let's take...
743
00:42:41,900 --> 00:42:46,070
Let's see if we can get him up here,
Mr Aldous Snow. Please, come on.
744
00:42:47,120 --> 00:42:48,160
Share your gift.
745
00:42:48,290 --> 00:42:49,510
Duty calls and all that.
746
00:42:49,640 --> 00:42:53,380
I'm trying to be incognito, it's weird.
It's like work to me, this is no fun.
747
00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:55,160
Hey! Thank you!
748
00:43:03,900 --> 00:43:06,290
Thank you.
What a lovely introduction.
749
00:43:06,510 --> 00:43:08,900
What an eccentric and confident young man.
750
00:43:09,030 --> 00:43:12,470
I'd like to dedicate this song to a
very beautiful woman that's here today.
751
00:43:12,690 --> 00:43:15,380
It's Miss Sarah Marshall, there she is.
752
00:43:16,300 --> 00:43:17,470
Look at her, blimey!
753
00:43:25,910 --> 00:43:28,300
Old as ancient skies
754
00:43:28,600 --> 00:43:31,210
I've had these wandering eyes
755
00:43:32,040 --> 00:43:34,350
but you took me by surprise
756
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:36,870
when you let me inside you
757
00:43:38,830 --> 00:43:40,520
Inside you
758
00:43:41,220 --> 00:43:43,300
Inside you
759
00:43:43,650 --> 00:43:45,090
This went from 6:00 to midnight.
760
00:43:45,220 --> 00:43:49,350
Teach me how to grow
while I'm moving inside of you
761
00:43:51,350 --> 00:43:53,130
Inside of you
762
00:43:54,050 --> 00:43:56,350
- Inside you
- Inside you
763
00:43:57,610 --> 00:44:00,440
I long to be, is it wrong to be
764
00:44:00,530 --> 00:44:02,830
inside of you
765
00:44:03,750 --> 00:44:07,920
Inside of you the restless
find their dreams
766
00:44:10,010 --> 00:44:13,880
Inside of you this king has found his queen
767
00:44:20,530 --> 00:44:21,580
Hey.
768
00:44:21,710 --> 00:44:22,840
You're from the breakfast buffet, right?
769
00:44:23,050 --> 00:44:23,970
- Yeah.
- Whipped cream or berries?
770
00:44:24,100 --> 00:44:25,140
Yeah. Yeah, I'm Peter.
771
00:44:27,230 --> 00:44:28,060
- Kemo.
- Kemo.
772
00:44:28,140 --> 00:44:30,360
- Good to meet you, man.
- Good to meet, you, man.
773
00:44:30,580 --> 00:44:32,840
- Have a beer.
- Thanks. Thank you.
774
00:44:35,360 --> 00:44:36,800
Sarah Marshall.
775
00:44:36,930 --> 00:44:37,970
Yes.
776
00:44:39,620 --> 00:44:41,630
How do you know
I was dating Sarah Marshall?
777
00:44:41,710 --> 00:44:44,230
Dwayne told me. Chuck told me.
778
00:44:45,060 --> 00:44:46,190
Even Rachel told me.
779
00:44:46,410 --> 00:44:50,370
I heard about it from everybody.
You gotta stop talking about it.
780
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:52,890
It's like The Sopranos.
781
00:44:53,060 --> 00:44:54,320
It's over.
782
00:44:54,980 --> 00:44:56,630
Find a new show.
783
00:44:58,200 --> 00:44:59,760
You need a hug.
784
00:45:00,060 --> 00:45:01,540
Come here.
785
00:45:03,280 --> 00:45:04,760
Oh, thank you.
786
00:45:04,850 --> 00:45:06,630
You're awfully nice.
787
00:45:07,890 --> 00:45:10,590
I gotta go.
I'm prepping the pig for tomorrow's luau.
788
00:45:10,720 --> 00:45:13,420
You should come and help me.
It'll take your mind off of things.
789
00:45:13,630 --> 00:45:15,500
- Yeah? You don't mind?
- No.
790
00:45:16,030 --> 00:45:18,720
I mean, I must say I'm a pretty good cook.
791
00:45:19,160 --> 00:45:20,420
All right!
792
00:45:23,640 --> 00:45:26,330
I can't! Please don't make me do this!
793
00:45:26,550 --> 00:45:27,590
Do it!
794
00:45:27,680 --> 00:45:30,200
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
795
00:45:34,990 --> 00:45:36,550
You can stop crying now.
796
00:45:36,770 --> 00:45:38,340
He's dead already.
797
00:45:38,860 --> 00:45:40,340
I'm not crying.
798
00:45:40,420 --> 00:45:41,680
You should stop crying.
799
00:45:41,900 --> 00:45:43,420
I don't cry. I'm not a baby.
800
00:45:43,560 --> 00:45:46,470
Really?
'Cause you look like a gigantic baby.
801
00:45:46,770 --> 00:45:49,380
I'm sorry. I didn't mean that at all.
802
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:00,340
Hey.
803
00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:05,040
Listen, would you like to hang out tonight,
like, not in an official hotel function?
804
00:46:05,130 --> 00:46:06,390
Yeah. Totally.
805
00:46:06,600 --> 00:46:09,080
A bunch of us are going to go to this,
like, little beach thing afterwards.
806
00:46:09,210 --> 00:46:11,480
You're totally welcome to come.
807
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:13,690
Maybe we could go together?
808
00:46:13,910 --> 00:46:15,350
Yeah, whatever.
809
00:46:15,780 --> 00:46:17,000
I mean we don't have to,
if you don't want to,
810
00:46:17,220 --> 00:46:18,170
I just thought that maybe...
811
00:46:18,260 --> 00:46:19,740
No, listen,
you don't have to make this weird.
812
00:46:19,830 --> 00:46:21,610
You either want to go or you don't.
813
00:46:23,170 --> 00:46:24,830
- I would love to.
- Okay.
814
00:46:25,480 --> 00:46:28,090
Awesome. Why don't you go upstairs,
change that shirt,
815
00:46:28,260 --> 00:46:31,000
and I'll meet you out front in, like, five?
816
00:46:41,090 --> 00:46:44,220
- This is so cool.
- You like it?
817
00:46:57,180 --> 00:46:59,450
So what brought you to Hawaii?
818
00:47:00,790 --> 00:47:03,100
- A dude.
- Of course.
819
00:47:03,230 --> 00:47:06,450
A surfer dude. You know, WCT, top 44.
820
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:10,930
Totally.
821
00:47:12,710 --> 00:47:15,100
We were together for two years.
822
00:47:15,410 --> 00:47:18,100
Dropped out of school,
moved out here with him.
823
00:47:18,230 --> 00:47:20,320
Three weeks later,
I caught him cheating on me,
824
00:47:20,540 --> 00:47:22,800
so I moved out, and that's that.
825
00:47:23,840 --> 00:47:25,410
What an asshole.
826
00:47:26,370 --> 00:47:27,930
No, he's just a boy.
827
00:47:30,410 --> 00:47:34,280
You ever think about going back home,
finishing school, or...
828
00:47:35,630 --> 00:47:36,590
No.
829
00:47:37,410 --> 00:47:39,410
No. I work at the hotel,
830
00:47:40,460 --> 00:47:43,150
doesn't really have to
be a future in there.
831
00:47:44,500 --> 00:47:45,980
Okay, my turn.
832
00:47:46,370 --> 00:47:47,550
Okay.
833
00:47:48,370 --> 00:47:52,550
So, how do you like
writing music for a TV show?
834
00:47:55,550 --> 00:47:57,850
It's great, you know. People are great.
835
00:47:57,940 --> 00:48:00,980
It's great to have a steady paycheque.
It's... I'm very lucky.
836
00:48:01,070 --> 00:48:02,110
Oh, my God, you hate it.
837
00:48:02,330 --> 00:48:04,510
I fucking hate it so much.
838
00:48:04,850 --> 00:48:07,120
So then, do something about it.
839
00:48:10,900 --> 00:48:11,810
Excuse me.
840
00:48:12,030 --> 00:48:15,160
I'm just saying, if you hate something,
change it.
841
00:48:15,250 --> 00:48:16,950
- Don't dwell.
- Well, I'm trying.
842
00:48:19,030 --> 00:48:21,640
I'm actually working on a rock opera.
843
00:48:22,690 --> 00:48:24,120
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
844
00:48:25,470 --> 00:48:27,690
What's your rock opera about?
845
00:48:30,170 --> 00:48:31,430
Dracula.
846
00:48:32,910 --> 00:48:35,690
Yeah, and eternal love, you know.
That's the theme.
847
00:48:35,820 --> 00:48:39,260
But I think the two sort of
go hand in hand, you know?
848
00:48:39,780 --> 00:48:41,040
And I...
849
00:48:43,130 --> 00:48:46,130
I have this vision of
doing it with puppets.
850
00:48:48,950 --> 00:48:50,740
I mean, humans also, you know.
851
00:48:53,220 --> 00:48:54,560
Why Dracula?
852
00:48:54,690 --> 00:48:58,440
Because he's a man like anyone else.
He just wants to be loved.
853
00:48:58,650 --> 00:49:00,300
And every time he gets close
to a human woman,
854
00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:02,090
he ends up smothering and killing her,
855
00:49:02,180 --> 00:49:04,780
which is a feeling I am familiar with.
856
00:49:04,910 --> 00:49:06,790
What? That's just a joke.
857
00:49:07,000 --> 00:49:08,740
- Oh, shit.
- What?
858
00:49:09,610 --> 00:49:12,610
My ex. If I run, you run.
859
00:49:14,180 --> 00:49:15,960
- Do you understand?
- No, I don't understand at all.
860
00:49:16,180 --> 00:49:17,920
Fucking motherfucker! Dipshit!
861
00:49:18,050 --> 00:49:18,960
Rachel, what are you doing?
862
00:49:19,180 --> 00:49:20,830
I thought I told you
to stay back on your island.
863
00:49:20,960 --> 00:49:22,010
Take it easy, just take it easy.
864
00:49:22,090 --> 00:49:23,270
Yeah, you know what?
The deal was over April 9.
865
00:49:23,360 --> 00:49:25,530
Well, the deal's back on, motherfucker.
866
00:49:25,660 --> 00:49:27,530
You ain't the chief in this village.
I'm the chief.
867
00:49:27,750 --> 00:49:28,790
Of the idiots?
868
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:31,570
Rachel, let me handle this. I know his
friend. Let me handle this, okay?
869
00:49:31,710 --> 00:49:33,140
Go ahead.
870
00:49:34,010 --> 00:49:35,970
Hey, man, you remember me from breakfast?
871
00:49:36,180 --> 00:49:38,790
- Oh, yeah, the cocktail guy, that's right.
- Yeah.
872
00:49:38,880 --> 00:49:42,010
This ain't the breakfast buffet.
What, you with my girl?
873
00:49:42,140 --> 00:49:44,230
Keeping her warm for me at night, huh?
874
00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:46,400
Hey, what are you doing here?
875
00:49:50,450 --> 00:49:51,930
That's right. Just hit him!
876
00:49:52,010 --> 00:49:53,280
Rachel, we gotta get out of here. Rachel?
877
00:49:53,410 --> 00:49:55,450
You get what you deserve.
878
00:50:07,450 --> 00:50:11,020
Just a boy?
No, that dude was a fucking man.
879
00:50:11,240 --> 00:50:15,060
No, no, no. He's an asshole.
I can't believe I ever dated him.
880
00:50:16,020 --> 00:50:17,800
- You went nuts.
- Yeah.
881
00:50:18,330 --> 00:50:20,800
You guys are dysfunctional.
882
00:50:21,410 --> 00:50:23,850
You were like one of those girls
from Flavour of Love.
883
00:50:23,940 --> 00:50:25,280
- From what?
- You were.
884
00:50:25,420 --> 00:50:27,290
"I'll kill you. I'll kill you."
885
00:50:28,630 --> 00:50:30,500
Okay, I'm gonna go get us another round.
886
00:50:30,590 --> 00:50:32,590
I'll grab it. It's no big deal.
887
00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:36,330
You don't have to dote on me.
I'm not that type of girl.
888
00:50:49,160 --> 00:50:50,730
You look so hot.
889
00:50:50,860 --> 00:50:53,120
Give me Crime Scene.
Give me dirty Crime Scene girl.
890
00:50:53,340 --> 00:50:55,420
André the Giant, out of the shot, please.
891
00:50:55,510 --> 00:50:57,510
Mutombo, out of the shot, come on.
892
00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:29,300
Did you know that there's a picture
of you flashing,
893
00:51:29,430 --> 00:51:30,870
hanging in the men's room?
894
00:51:31,090 --> 00:51:34,000
Yeah. I hate it so much.
895
00:51:34,130 --> 00:51:36,740
My jackass boyfriend made me do it.
896
00:51:37,350 --> 00:51:39,220
Keoki took it, right there.
897
00:51:39,310 --> 00:51:41,390
And I asked him to take it down,
898
00:51:41,520 --> 00:51:44,960
but he said that it would ruin
the balance of the collage.
899
00:51:46,000 --> 00:51:47,570
Do you want me to try
to get it down for you?
900
00:51:47,790 --> 00:51:51,440
No. No, no, no, he'll kill you.
Like, really kill you.
901
00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:55,700
But I have a surprise for you.
902
00:51:56,220 --> 00:51:57,480
Really, what?
903
00:51:57,570 --> 00:51:58,830
We're gonna take a quick break.
904
00:51:59,050 --> 00:52:01,010
Tonight we have a special guest
from the mainland,
905
00:52:01,140 --> 00:52:03,920
singing a song from his Dracula musical,
906
00:52:04,270 --> 00:52:07,270
please welcome to the stage,
Mr Peter Bretter.
907
00:52:09,140 --> 00:52:10,310
Peter!
908
00:52:10,400 --> 00:52:12,050
Yeah! Go get them, tiger!
909
00:52:12,180 --> 00:52:13,100
Please don't.
910
00:52:14,440 --> 00:52:15,710
Peter!
911
00:52:16,010 --> 00:52:18,450
- Rachel...
- Dracula! Peter!
912
00:52:23,840 --> 00:52:25,100
Get them!
913
00:52:25,320 --> 00:52:26,230
What's up?
914
00:52:32,930 --> 00:52:34,280
Thank you.
915
00:52:37,100 --> 00:52:38,540
You know, I could play something else.
916
00:52:38,670 --> 00:52:40,100
I just think out of
context this might be...
917
00:52:40,320 --> 00:52:41,890
Dracula musical!
918
00:52:43,890 --> 00:52:45,240
Thank you.
919
00:53:05,460 --> 00:53:09,940
It's getting kind of hard to believe
things are going to get better
920
00:53:12,240 --> 00:53:17,980
I've been drowning too long to believe
that the tide's going to turn
921
00:53:19,720 --> 00:53:24,860
And I've been living too hard to believe
things are going to get easier now
922
00:53:27,030 --> 00:53:31,640
I'm still trying to shake off the pain
from the lessons I've learned
923
00:53:34,250 --> 00:53:39,030
And if I see Van Helsing, I swear
to the lord I will slay him
924
00:53:41,430 --> 00:53:45,600
Take it from me, but I swear
I won't let it be so
925
00:53:48,120 --> 00:53:52,990
Blood will run down his face
when he is decapitated
926
00:53:54,470 --> 00:53:58,300
His head on my mantle
is how I will let this one know
927
00:53:59,780 --> 00:54:01,560
How much I love you
928
00:54:09,260 --> 00:54:10,430
Die
929
00:54:11,350 --> 00:54:12,390
Die
930
00:54:13,570 --> 00:54:14,610
Die
931
00:54:19,180 --> 00:54:20,310
I can't
932
00:54:31,920 --> 00:54:33,270
Awesome!
933
00:54:33,790 --> 00:54:35,220
Thank you.
934
00:54:39,180 --> 00:54:40,140
Thank you.
935
00:54:40,570 --> 00:54:43,570
So, I had a really, really
great time tonight.
936
00:54:43,660 --> 00:54:45,750
- Yeah?
- Yeah. I mean, it got a little wild.
937
00:54:45,960 --> 00:54:47,840
- "A little"? You can say that.
- Yeah.
938
00:54:47,970 --> 00:54:50,660
But it was really fun,
and you're so cool, and it was...
939
00:54:50,750 --> 00:54:52,450
Thank you for taking me out.
940
00:54:52,530 --> 00:54:54,230
No, I had a great time. Thank you.
941
00:54:55,970 --> 00:54:57,530
- You did?
- Yeah.
942
00:55:01,710 --> 00:55:03,800
I'm sorry.
943
00:55:03,930 --> 00:55:08,060
I'm sorry, I just... I don't...
I just don't wanna complicate things.
944
00:55:08,190 --> 00:55:09,540
- No, of course!
- Yeah?
945
00:55:09,620 --> 00:55:12,760
No, no, no. Totally. I totally get that.
946
00:55:12,970 --> 00:55:15,060
- I had a great time.
- A handshake?
947
00:55:15,190 --> 00:55:18,410
- Well, I don't know. Okay.
- All right, all right.
948
00:55:18,500 --> 00:55:21,110
- All right. Get home safe.
- You, too.
949
00:55:24,240 --> 00:55:26,240
- Thanks again.
- Bye.
950
00:55:33,500 --> 00:55:37,070
I'm on a hammock with me lady
951
00:55:37,280 --> 00:55:40,630
Watching the sea roll by
952
00:55:42,890 --> 00:55:45,500
Things have been great now
953
00:55:45,630 --> 00:55:48,850
'Cause we're in Hawaii
954
00:55:50,720 --> 00:55:52,200
Hey, guys.
955
00:55:53,330 --> 00:55:55,510
Hey, man. I'm Koonu.
956
00:55:56,380 --> 00:55:59,590
Yeah. No, I remember. I'm Peter.
We took a surf lesson together.
957
00:55:59,680 --> 00:56:03,120
Yeah, you're that guy
that works with Kaiser Permanente.
958
00:56:03,250 --> 00:56:06,770
No, I'm Peter.
We had a nice talk out on the water.
959
00:56:06,900 --> 00:56:08,340
That's cool.
960
00:56:10,550 --> 00:56:12,510
Okay, can I just say something?
961
00:56:12,640 --> 00:56:16,080
- I went on a date tonight with Rachel, right?
- That wasn't a date.
962
00:56:16,160 --> 00:56:18,160
She's in customer service, dude.
963
00:56:18,250 --> 00:56:20,250
She took you out for charity.
964
00:56:20,430 --> 00:56:24,600
It was a date, okay? Trust me.
I know a date, and that was a date.
965
00:56:24,820 --> 00:56:25,950
I bet you think strippers like you, too.
966
00:56:26,080 --> 00:56:27,120
- That's really not necessary.
- It's true.
967
00:56:29,080 --> 00:56:32,130
Don't waste your time, man.
Believe me, it is a nowhere road. I know.
968
00:56:32,210 --> 00:56:35,130
Did you see her ex-boyfriend?
He is ridiculous.
969
00:56:35,260 --> 00:56:37,430
Who, Greg? I love Greg, man.
970
00:56:37,650 --> 00:56:40,260
I saw him beat up a guy with a starfish.
971
00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:43,480
- Okay, that's just ridiculous.
- That guy was me.
972
00:56:43,610 --> 00:56:46,390
Dude, my homie over here,
on his honeymoon?
973
00:56:46,610 --> 00:56:49,130
Getting as much sex
as he possibly can ever have.
974
00:56:49,220 --> 00:56:51,000
Are you giving to her
hard and rough, dude?
975
00:56:51,090 --> 00:56:52,560
Come on.
976
00:56:53,910 --> 00:56:59,740
The wife wants me to do certain things
that I find inappropriate.
977
00:56:59,960 --> 00:57:02,790
Let me just say
that if God was a city planner,
978
00:57:02,870 --> 00:57:06,660
he would not put a playground
next to a sewage system.
979
00:57:08,920 --> 00:57:13,010
We're trying to fuck,
but we're not having fun fucking.
980
00:57:13,090 --> 00:57:17,050
We're just, like...
I'm stabbing her private parts,
981
00:57:19,660 --> 00:57:23,100
and it's not fun, and it causes anxiety.
Fucking is...
982
00:57:23,310 --> 00:57:24,880
And then when you're not fucking...
983
00:57:25,010 --> 00:57:27,710
- Hey, someone's gotta stop him.
- You're the butt of a joke.
984
00:57:27,790 --> 00:57:30,180
Fucking this ring is...
985
00:57:30,400 --> 00:57:31,970
Fuck!
986
00:57:32,100 --> 00:57:34,180
It's gonna be all right.
987
00:57:35,930 --> 00:57:37,190
Hi.
988
00:57:38,750 --> 00:57:41,140
Hi, do you wanna come back to bed?
989
00:57:41,270 --> 00:57:42,400
Sure.
990
00:57:45,410 --> 00:57:46,670
Have fun.
991
00:57:48,230 --> 00:57:52,410
I like her hair.
I wonder if the carpet matches her pubes.
992
00:58:00,450 --> 00:58:02,190
Julian, what's up?
993
00:58:04,630 --> 00:58:05,540
Oh.
994
00:58:06,590 --> 00:58:07,850
God.
995
00:58:18,070 --> 00:58:19,850
The show's been cancelled.
996
00:58:20,020 --> 00:58:21,810
That's good, 'cause that's what you wanted.
997
00:58:21,940 --> 00:58:24,420
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
998
00:58:25,770 --> 00:58:30,900
It's just... I guess
I thought we had another year left.
999
00:58:30,980 --> 00:58:33,070
It seems like we did, and...
This'll be good,
1000
00:58:33,290 --> 00:58:36,420
'cause it's been a long-awaited transition
into film for me.
1001
00:58:36,510 --> 00:58:39,770
Don't get me wrong, but it's just...
It's a surprise.
1002
00:58:39,860 --> 00:58:41,510
Come on tour with me.
1003
00:58:41,640 --> 00:58:46,420
I'll serenade you every night
in front of thousands of women.
1004
00:58:46,510 --> 00:58:48,210
I didn't know you were going on tour.
1005
00:58:48,420 --> 00:58:49,550
Yeah, I'm going in two weeks.
1006
00:58:49,640 --> 00:58:53,730
It's like an 18-month tour,
43 countries, Infant Sorrow,
1007
00:58:53,820 --> 00:58:55,900
and it's gonna be a massive tour.
1008
00:58:56,030 --> 00:59:01,120
Yeah. I can't come 'cause I have a job.
I'm a working actress.
1009
00:59:01,250 --> 00:59:02,990
Not any more.
1010
00:59:03,120 --> 00:59:04,340
You're an unemployed actress, perfect.
1011
00:59:06,040 --> 00:59:10,210
You could be the queen of the groupies,
queen of the Sorrow Suckers.
1012
00:59:10,520 --> 00:59:12,820
The Sorrow Suckers.
1013
00:59:12,910 --> 00:59:16,340
Sorrow Suckers.
I don't know why they call them that.
1014
00:59:16,560 --> 00:59:19,690
Mr and Mrs Snow, sorry.
Sorry to bother you.
1015
00:59:21,350 --> 00:59:23,130
The hotel wanted to offer you
some complimentary coconut cake.
1016
00:59:23,210 --> 00:59:27,300
It's from the hotel. It's definitely
not from me personally, so...
1017
00:59:28,560 --> 00:59:30,650
- Yeah, thanks.
- Okay, great.
1018
00:59:30,740 --> 00:59:34,090
When were you planning on telling me this?
1019
00:59:34,170 --> 00:59:37,740
- I just told you, then.
- Yeah. No, I know.
1020
00:59:37,920 --> 00:59:42,610
But telling me now
isn't really the same as telling me.
1021
00:59:42,830 --> 00:59:45,440
Well, look, you know,
I've not told you I've got genital herpes,
1022
00:59:45,660 --> 00:59:47,960
because it's not inflamed at the moment.
1023
00:59:48,050 --> 00:59:50,050
Do you guys want some champagne
with your cake,
1024
00:59:50,140 --> 00:59:51,480
or do you want it without your cake?
1025
00:59:51,610 --> 00:59:53,180
I don't drink.
1026
01:00:00,660 --> 01:00:04,840
All right, so I came here
to give you my demo. I just...
1027
01:00:05,140 --> 01:00:07,450
I worship you,
and I just wanted to give you my demo.
1028
01:00:08,580 --> 01:00:10,660
Just take a listen and...
1029
01:00:11,710 --> 01:00:13,050
Okay.
1030
01:00:13,790 --> 01:00:16,529
'Cause you know what?
You don't wanna be the guy sitting there,
1031
01:00:16,530 --> 01:00:19,229
watching BBC, and saying,
1032
01:00:19,230 --> 01:00:22,969
"Oh, I saw that guy! He was my waiter,
1033
01:00:22,970 --> 01:00:27,059
"and I totally dismissed him
like everyone else does in his life.
1034
01:00:27,060 --> 01:00:28,929
"And I totally was wrong,
1035
01:00:28,930 --> 01:00:32,579
"because he's a major, major,
major influence on me now,
1036
01:00:32,580 --> 01:00:34,150
"and I feel terrible!"
1037
01:00:37,800 --> 01:00:40,580
That stupid English voice, was that me?
1038
01:00:42,150 --> 01:00:43,850
Unfortunately, yes.
1039
01:00:45,190 --> 01:00:48,109
You're really gonna like it.
1040
01:00:48,110 --> 01:00:50,930
I'll listen to it when you've gone.
1041
01:00:56,980 --> 01:00:59,890
Hey, look, just don't
tell anyone at the hotel.
1042
01:01:09,070 --> 01:01:11,249
- What's up, dude?
- What's up?
1043
01:01:11,250 --> 01:01:16,069
Peter, I got some really interesting news
this morning.
1044
01:01:16,070 --> 01:01:18,029
Aldous gave you gonorrhoea?
1045
01:01:18,030 --> 01:01:21,159
No. Why would I tell you that?
1046
01:01:21,160 --> 01:01:23,769
Crime Scene was cancelled.
1047
01:01:23,770 --> 01:01:24,810
Whoa.
1048
01:01:25,860 --> 01:01:26,900
Wow.
1049
01:01:29,900 --> 01:01:32,640
- You all right?
- Yeah. Yeah.
1050
01:01:34,080 --> 01:01:36,599
I mean, I've been waiting
to take the next step,
1051
01:01:36,600 --> 01:01:39,509
you know, into features for a long time,
so it's a really good thing.
1052
01:01:39,510 --> 01:01:44,300
This isn't The View. I mean, we can have
an honest talk about this if we want.
1053
01:01:46,080 --> 01:01:49,129
I don't wanna step out of the spotlight
and then be forgotten.
1054
01:01:49,130 --> 01:01:51,819
I don't wanna disappear. I'm freaked out.
1055
01:01:51,820 --> 01:01:54,429
I wanna be honest.
I'm really freaked out right now, okay?
1056
01:01:54,430 --> 01:01:58,479
Because, seemingly, the only actresses
that actually can survive
1057
01:01:58,480 --> 01:02:01,609
are the ones that show their cooter,
and, excuse me, but I refuse to do that.
1058
01:02:01,610 --> 01:02:02,999
I have a little dignity.
1059
01:02:03,000 --> 01:02:06,089
And I don't have the frame to support
plastic surgery. I would tip over.
1060
01:02:06,090 --> 01:02:08,519
And I'm not gonna do that.
I'm not gonna exploit myself.
1061
01:02:08,520 --> 01:02:12,700
Listen, you're gonna be fine.
You have a long career ahead of you.
1062
01:02:13,000 --> 01:02:16,649
You've got, like, four
years until you're 30.
1063
01:02:16,650 --> 01:02:18,390
It's gonna be fine.
1064
01:02:22,350 --> 01:02:24,959
- How are you?
- I'm screwed.
1065
01:02:24,960 --> 01:02:30,479
Frankly, I don't stand a chance.
No, I'll be fine.
1066
01:02:30,480 --> 01:02:34,050
I've been quietly stealing money
from you for a long time.
1067
01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:38,970
You're always good at cheering me up,
Pete, thank you.
1068
01:02:42,270 --> 01:02:43,970
Die
1069
01:02:44,490 --> 01:02:45,920
Die
1070
01:02:46,660 --> 01:02:48,010
Die
1071
01:02:50,840 --> 01:02:52,490
I can't
1072
01:02:56,270 --> 01:02:59,579
It's really good, Peter.
I just don't understand it. I don't.
1073
01:02:59,580 --> 01:03:02,929
I mean, just chalk it up to that. Please
don't play it again, 'cause I don't...
1074
01:03:02,930 --> 01:03:05,100
Just listen to it one more time and see...
1075
01:03:07,190 --> 01:03:08,230
Where's Aldous?
1076
01:03:10,320 --> 01:03:12,839
- Mr Snow, may I ask you a question?
- Okay.
1077
01:03:12,840 --> 01:03:15,969
I want to please my wife here,
on our honeymoon,
1078
01:03:15,970 --> 01:03:17,239
but I don't know what I'm doing.
1079
01:03:17,240 --> 01:03:18,889
You having difficulty sex-wise?
1080
01:03:18,890 --> 01:03:21,189
- Do you not know how to use this?
- I know how.
1081
01:03:21,190 --> 01:03:23,979
- Have you had sex before?
- We can't.
1082
01:03:23,980 --> 01:03:25,539
- Why?
- Our religion.
1083
01:03:25,540 --> 01:03:27,109
Right, 'cause of God and everything?
1084
01:03:27,110 --> 01:03:28,369
Hey, that's not gonna be a problem,
1085
01:03:28,370 --> 01:03:30,669
because God should be present
in the bedroom.
1086
01:03:30,670 --> 01:03:33,279
Just tell me specifically
what I need to do.
1087
01:03:33,280 --> 01:03:36,199
You need to penetrate deeply
and stimulate the clitoris simultaneously.
1088
01:03:36,200 --> 01:03:38,069
That's what you gotta do.
That's what it's about.
1089
01:03:38,070 --> 01:03:40,589
If you can involve the anus in that,
then that's absolute perfection.
1090
01:03:40,590 --> 01:03:41,629
Got it.
1091
01:03:41,630 --> 01:03:44,029
Explore her ears.
1092
01:03:44,030 --> 01:03:47,459
Find it in you to be a little more circly.
1093
01:03:47,460 --> 01:03:48,589
You are a man.
1094
01:03:48,590 --> 01:03:49,939
God's within you.
1095
01:03:49,940 --> 01:03:51,419
I actually feel okay about it.
1096
01:03:51,420 --> 01:03:54,329
You know, I'm a little scared, but I'll
be all right. I'll get another job.
1097
01:03:54,330 --> 01:03:57,029
That's interesting, man.
You know what else is interesting?
1098
01:03:57,030 --> 01:03:59,989
- What?
- Me on the moon.
1099
01:03:59,990 --> 01:04:02,249
I just wanna talk to you about something.
Can you stop?
1100
01:04:02,250 --> 01:04:04,469
- All right, I'm just gonna talk, and then...
- Air!
1101
01:04:04,470 --> 01:04:06,949
There was this interesting moment
with Sarah.
1102
01:04:06,950 --> 01:04:10,379
Whoa, what? I don't wanna hear about
your interesting moment with Sarah, Pete.
1103
01:04:10,380 --> 01:04:12,159
Then who am I supposed to talk to
about this?
1104
01:04:12,160 --> 01:04:15,899
Well, not me, because have I ever had an
interesting moment with an ex-girlfriend?
1105
01:04:15,900 --> 01:04:18,509
- Do you have an ex-girlfriend? No!
- No.
1106
01:04:18,510 --> 01:04:19,780
LIZ: No.
1107
01:04:20,820 --> 01:04:24,169
I would really love to get
the woman's perspective on the matter.
1108
01:04:24,170 --> 01:04:25,729
- Really?
- No.
1109
01:04:25,730 --> 01:04:27,519
But come on in and just sit down.
1110
01:04:27,520 --> 01:04:30,209
- Stay. You have to...
- Honey, no, no, the camera's right there.
1111
01:04:30,210 --> 01:04:31,469
No, I know,
but I just wanna tell him, though.
1112
01:04:31,470 --> 01:04:34,259
- No, the camera...
- Think about how much she's hurt you.
1113
01:04:34,260 --> 01:04:35,429
- Hey, Liz?
- Yeah?
1114
01:04:35,430 --> 01:04:37,819
I think you need to move just a tiny bit
further away from the microphone.
1115
01:04:37,820 --> 01:04:38,949
- Just...
- No, closer.
1116
01:04:38,950 --> 01:04:40,129
- Now a little further.
- Okay.
1117
01:04:40,130 --> 01:04:41,259
- Closer.
- And then...
1118
01:04:41,260 --> 01:04:42,520
- And then a little further, and then closer.
- I don't know.
1119
01:04:44,170 --> 01:04:45,429
- Keep your head down, though.
- I'm bad at this thing.
1120
01:04:45,430 --> 01:04:47,089
- Can you hear me?
- Yeah, closer. Further away.
1121
01:04:47,090 --> 01:04:49,999
I know what you're doing.
That's not funny at all.
1122
01:04:50,000 --> 01:04:51,040
- You stop that.
- What?
1123
01:04:52,830 --> 01:04:54,610
- What's he doing?
- Come on. Yeah, yeah, real funny.
1124
01:04:56,260 --> 01:04:57,439
Hey, that's a great necklace, Liz.
1125
01:04:57,440 --> 01:04:59,519
- Did you have that a second ago?
- Thank you!
1126
01:04:59,520 --> 01:05:01,479
That's gross!
1127
01:05:01,480 --> 01:05:02,959
- LIZ: I don't get it.
- Stop it.
1128
01:05:02,960 --> 01:05:06,699
- He's saying if I were to sperm on you...
- What?
1129
01:05:06,700 --> 01:05:09,829
...it would be a pearl necklace.
- Why?
1130
01:05:09,830 --> 01:05:11,700
- Real funny.
- Sorry.
1131
01:05:13,570 --> 01:05:15,269
Hey, Dracula!
1132
01:05:15,270 --> 01:05:18,490
"And when I see Van Helsing,
I swear to the Lord, I'll slay him."
1133
01:05:21,620 --> 01:05:24,099
That shit is funny, dude!
1134
01:05:24,100 --> 01:05:25,659
Hey, Pete.
1135
01:05:25,660 --> 01:05:28,269
So I was gonna go over
to Lazy Joe's later tonight,
1136
01:05:28,270 --> 01:05:29,530
and I wanted to see
if you wanted to come and join.
1137
01:05:32,140 --> 01:05:34,839
I think I'm confused,
because I thought last night...
1138
01:05:34,840 --> 01:05:38,839
Oh, my God. Dude, get out of your head.
It's really nice out here.
1139
01:05:38,840 --> 01:05:41,539
Yeah, I bet it is.
1140
01:05:41,540 --> 01:05:42,799
All right, yeah. You know what?
1141
01:05:42,800 --> 01:05:44,229
I could totally use a
friendly hangout, so...
1142
01:05:44,230 --> 01:05:45,409
All right.
1143
01:05:45,410 --> 01:05:46,969
I don't know if you want,
instead of Lazy Joe's,
1144
01:05:46,970 --> 01:05:48,929
I was thinking of going
to Laie Point right now.
1145
01:05:48,930 --> 01:05:50,279
- Really?
- Yeah.
1146
01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:52,670
I heard that place was a pain in the ass.
1147
01:05:53,840 --> 01:05:54,970
Okay.
1148
01:05:56,240 --> 01:05:57,579
- Hey!
Yo, what's up, guys?
1149
01:05:57,580 --> 01:05:58,709
We're just going for a hike.
1150
01:05:58,710 --> 01:06:01,539
No, you're not, you're going snorkelling.
1151
01:06:01,540 --> 01:06:03,019
I think we're gonna go on a hike.
1152
01:06:03,020 --> 01:06:06,239
It is sea turtle fucking season, dude.
Let's go.
1153
01:06:06,240 --> 01:06:09,679
They fuck for three hours, dude.
I mean, that's magical.
1154
01:06:09,680 --> 01:06:11,539
- No, we're going on a hike.
- I think we'll go on a hike, yeah.
1155
01:06:11,540 --> 01:06:13,330
What? Your loss.
1156
01:06:14,680 --> 01:06:16,550
Why won't anybody
go snorkelling with me?
1157
01:06:22,720 --> 01:06:24,900
How you doing back there?
1158
01:06:25,940 --> 01:06:27,419
Awesome.
1159
01:06:27,420 --> 01:06:30,769
I don't think I've ever been
this covered in sweat before.
1160
01:06:30,770 --> 01:06:32,939
It's like I have some sort of fever.
1161
01:06:32,940 --> 01:06:37,120
I told you this was a pain in the ass.
Could've been at Lazy Joe's.
1162
01:06:37,200 --> 01:06:38,899
- Oh, yeah.
- Uh-huh.
1163
01:06:38,900 --> 01:06:40,769
Oh, shit.
1164
01:06:40,770 --> 01:06:42,420
- You good?
- No.
1165
01:06:45,550 --> 01:06:48,249
Wow, we're really going
up to the edge of this, huh?
1166
01:06:48,250 --> 01:06:49,510
Look!
1167
01:06:53,690 --> 01:06:55,690
Wow, this is really beautiful.
1168
01:06:59,210 --> 01:07:03,909
All right, so now that your show's done,
are you gonna finish the Dracula musical?
1169
01:07:03,910 --> 01:07:05,990
It's not that easy, you know.
1170
01:07:07,130 --> 01:07:09,869
Sarah always thought it was crazy, and...
1171
01:07:09,870 --> 01:07:14,739
Well, you're definitely crazy.
But so is everyone, right? So who cares?
1172
01:07:14,740 --> 01:07:18,169
- I just don't feel like doing anything.
- Why?
1173
01:07:18,170 --> 01:07:19,559
'Cause my heart is broken,
1174
01:07:19,560 --> 01:07:22,349
and I can't imagine
doing anything right now.
1175
01:07:22,350 --> 01:07:26,300
It's probably the same reason
you don't go back to school, you know?
1176
01:07:29,870 --> 01:07:32,699
Maybe it's good we got hurt like that,
you know?
1177
01:07:32,700 --> 01:07:38,089
I don't know about you,
but it makes me feel impervious to pain.
1178
01:07:38,090 --> 01:07:41,739
Yeah. Kind of like
there's nothing left to be afraid of.
1179
01:07:41,740 --> 01:07:44,479
- Yeah. No, exactly.
- Right.
1180
01:07:44,480 --> 01:07:48,660
We could leap off this rock,
and it won't hurt us as bad as they did.
1181
01:07:50,830 --> 01:07:52,789
So jump, then.
1182
01:07:52,790 --> 01:07:55,229
No, I meant that,
like, as a metaphor, you know?
1183
01:07:55,230 --> 01:07:57,310
No. Just do it.
1184
01:08:00,230 --> 01:08:03,010
You'll be fine. Jump.
1185
01:08:08,880 --> 01:08:10,750
What the hell?
1186
01:08:12,840 --> 01:08:15,840
Oh, God! Oh, God. I made her kill herself!
1187
01:08:21,280 --> 01:08:23,149
You must be crazy!
1188
01:08:23,150 --> 01:08:26,059
- So are you gonna jump or what?
- No!
1189
01:08:26,060 --> 01:08:29,629
Come on, Peter!
I can see your vagina from here!
1190
01:08:29,630 --> 01:08:32,449
I can see your hoo-ha.
1191
01:08:32,450 --> 01:08:34,839
I mean, I'll jump!
1192
01:08:34,840 --> 01:08:36,930
Chicken! Come on!
1193
01:08:53,290 --> 01:08:56,720
Please, God, don't let me die today.
1194
01:08:58,420 --> 01:09:00,289
- I'm okay!
- Okay!
1195
01:09:00,290 --> 01:09:03,289
- I'll just let go, right?
- No, no, no!
1196
01:09:03,290 --> 01:09:07,460
If you fall straight down, you'd
probably hit a rock and kill yourself!
1197
01:09:08,720 --> 01:09:10,679
- Totally.
- Yeah.
1198
01:09:10,680 --> 01:09:11,939
So what do I do?
1199
01:09:11,940 --> 01:09:14,769
Why don't you press your feet
up against the rock,
1200
01:09:14,770 --> 01:09:16,859
and, like, shoot yourself off!
1201
01:09:16,860 --> 01:09:18,639
- What, like a frog?
- I don't know, Peter!
1202
01:09:18,640 --> 01:09:21,339
Just get off the fucking rock!
1203
01:09:21,340 --> 01:09:23,729
- Here I go!
- Okay!
1204
01:09:23,730 --> 01:09:24,990
One!
1205
01:09:26,860 --> 01:09:27,990
Two!
1206
01:09:28,640 --> 01:09:29,900
Two!
1207
01:09:32,600 --> 01:09:34,909
- Two and a half!
- Jump!
1208
01:09:34,910 --> 01:09:36,340
Three!
1209
01:09:49,820 --> 01:09:53,559
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
1210
01:09:53,560 --> 01:09:55,429
- You saw that, right?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw it!
1211
01:09:55,430 --> 01:09:57,949
I was there. I witnessed it.
1212
01:09:57,950 --> 01:09:59,300
Thanks.
1213
01:10:05,960 --> 01:10:07,440
Come on.
1214
01:10:15,130 --> 01:10:18,180
You've got Christ between your thighs,
1215
01:10:19,400 --> 01:10:21,480
but with a shorter beard.
1216
01:10:22,010 --> 01:10:24,610
- Mahalo.
- Aloha.
1217
01:10:25,050 --> 01:10:27,569
- Sex!
- I'm cramping, I'm cramping.
1218
01:10:27,570 --> 01:10:29,220
- Okay.
- Okay, okay.
1219
01:10:31,400 --> 01:10:33,790
Petey? Petey?
1220
01:10:37,660 --> 01:10:40,489
Sorry. I knocked a bunch.
1221
01:10:40,490 --> 01:10:41,750
You were really out.
Ken sent me.
1222
01:10:43,490 --> 01:10:46,749
Dakota Fanning and her people,
they need this room.
1223
01:10:46,750 --> 01:10:48,400
She loves it here.
1224
01:10:49,360 --> 01:10:50,400
Oh.
1225
01:10:51,230 --> 01:10:52,489
So does that mean I have
to leave the hotel?
1226
01:10:52,490 --> 01:10:53,540
Ken found you a room.
1227
01:10:55,490 --> 01:10:58,190
I'll take it, yeah.
I wanna hang out with Rachel a little more.
1228
01:11:00,410 --> 01:11:03,710
Are those sad tissues or happy tissues?
1229
01:11:07,500 --> 01:11:09,890
Maybe you should just give me a minute.
1230
01:11:13,410 --> 01:11:16,459
It was the only room available!
1231
01:11:16,460 --> 01:11:18,240
I'm sure it was!
1232
01:11:21,980 --> 01:11:24,499
- Hey, how's it going?
- It's all right.
1233
01:11:24,500 --> 01:11:26,069
Really?
1234
01:11:26,070 --> 01:11:29,589
I think you got some pain behind
those eyes. A kind of pain that only...
1235
01:11:29,590 --> 01:11:31,239
Okay, you know what?
Let's cut the bullshit.
1236
01:11:31,240 --> 01:11:33,549
I wanna stand up on a wave before I leave.
1237
01:11:33,550 --> 01:11:35,419
I don't think you're ready yet, man.
1238
01:11:35,420 --> 01:11:38,980
- I'm ready to ride giants, Koonu.
- I think you're ready.
1239
01:12:01,510 --> 01:12:02,860
Petey!
1240
01:12:07,950 --> 01:12:09,119
- Hi.
- Hi.
1241
01:12:09,120 --> 01:12:11,949
Miss Marshall, what can I do for you?
1242
01:12:11,950 --> 01:12:14,509
Is there a place
to get good sushi around here?
1243
01:12:14,510 --> 01:12:18,690
Yeah. Yeah, there's a really great place
about five minutes from here called Asuki.
1244
01:12:19,040 --> 01:12:20,599
Perfect.
1245
01:12:20,600 --> 01:12:22,259
- Do you want me to get you a map?
- Please.
1246
01:12:22,260 --> 01:12:23,390
Okay.
1247
01:12:24,130 --> 01:12:27,559
So, this is where we are.
1248
01:12:27,560 --> 01:12:31,739
Head down Kamehameha,
and then pass Funaho Loko Marsh.
1249
01:12:31,740 --> 01:12:33,739
And it should be right to the left.
1250
01:12:33,740 --> 01:12:35,999
It might take, like, five minutes.
1251
01:12:36,000 --> 01:12:38,390
- Great. Thank you.
- Any time.
1252
01:12:42,170 --> 01:12:43,609
Um...
1253
01:12:43,610 --> 01:12:47,259
- I saw you with Peter Bretter...
- Yeah.
1254
01:12:47,260 --> 01:12:49,999
...who's my ex-boyfriend.
1255
01:12:50,000 --> 01:12:53,309
Oh, my God. I'm really sorry.
1256
01:12:53,310 --> 01:12:54,789
- No.
- It's not like that at all.
1257
01:12:54,790 --> 01:12:56,349
- It's not what you're...
- No, it's fine.
1258
01:12:56,350 --> 01:12:58,439
I'm just really glad
you're keeping him company, 'cause...
1259
01:12:58,440 --> 01:13:01,269
- Gosh, no.
...you seem like a really nice person,
1260
01:13:01,270 --> 01:13:04,049
- and you're very pretty.
- Thank you.
1261
01:13:04,050 --> 01:13:06,569
Gosh, you're, like, way prettier.
1262
01:13:06,570 --> 01:13:08,880
No, you're, like, so pretty.
1263
01:13:10,960 --> 01:13:12,310
Really?
1264
01:13:13,230 --> 01:13:16,789
- Yeah.
- Wow, thank you. Thank you.
1265
01:13:16,790 --> 01:13:18,969
And one more thing about Peter.
1266
01:13:18,970 --> 01:13:24,790
He's a really good guy. Really good.
Like, great, actually.
1267
01:13:25,320 --> 01:13:26,580
Yeah.
1268
01:13:27,230 --> 01:13:28,270
Um...
1269
01:13:32,100 --> 01:13:34,709
Please don't cry, Miss Marshall.
1270
01:13:34,710 --> 01:13:37,539
God. Do you need me to get you a tissue?
1271
01:13:37,540 --> 01:13:40,360
Oh, no, I'm good, I'm good.
I'm okay, I'm okay.
1272
01:13:41,280 --> 01:13:42,540
Okay.
1273
01:13:44,540 --> 01:13:48,370
- Thank you, Rachel.
- Any time, Miss Marshall.
1274
01:13:58,280 --> 01:14:00,459
Hey, ahoy, there!
1275
01:14:00,460 --> 01:14:02,239
You surf, too?
1276
01:14:02,240 --> 01:14:05,149
Good Lord, no.
I'm just drifting around, you know?
1277
01:14:05,150 --> 01:14:09,330
Getting in touch with the ocean and stuff.
It's really pleasant.
1278
01:14:09,630 --> 01:14:11,200
It was, yeah.
1279
01:14:12,900 --> 01:14:14,109
I'm gonna head in.
1280
01:14:14,110 --> 01:14:16,549
Before you go, actually, Peter,
I just wanted to tell you,
1281
01:14:16,550 --> 01:14:18,939
I was listening to Sarah's iPod
the other day,
1282
01:14:18,940 --> 01:14:22,899
and amidst the interminable dross
that's on that thing,
1283
01:14:22,900 --> 01:14:25,069
I found one track that I quite liked.
1284
01:14:25,070 --> 01:14:28,199
So I checked what it was,
and it was actually one of yours.
1285
01:14:28,200 --> 01:14:33,200
And it kind of reminded me of a dark,
gothic Neil Diamond. It's great.
1286
01:14:34,380 --> 01:14:36,639
That's, like, exactly what I'm going for.
1287
01:14:36,640 --> 01:14:38,210
Right, yeah.
1288
01:14:41,990 --> 01:14:43,340
Fuck.
1289
01:14:45,210 --> 01:14:46,770
Fuck, you're cool.
1290
01:14:48,340 --> 01:14:53,120
It's so hard to say,
because, like, I hate you in so many ways,
1291
01:14:55,120 --> 01:14:57,209
but whatever.
I can see why Sarah likes you.
1292
01:14:57,210 --> 01:15:00,729
No accounting for taste, I suppose.
In her case, anyway.
1293
01:15:00,730 --> 01:15:03,869
She was with me for five years,
so there you go.
1294
01:15:03,870 --> 01:15:06,780
Yeah, you got four on me there, mate.
1295
01:15:09,820 --> 01:15:12,129
You slept with Sarah a year ago?
1296
01:15:12,130 --> 01:15:16,260
I thought you knew!
Peter, please, don't take it seriously.
1297
01:15:16,480 --> 01:15:19,609
- What the fuck, man! You've...
- Don't get offended by that.
1298
01:15:19,610 --> 01:15:22,000
You can't be so casual about this!
1299
01:15:24,000 --> 01:15:25,129
This isn't Europe, okay?
There are rules here.
1300
01:15:25,130 --> 01:15:28,789
I'm really sorry.
I apologise for offending you, Peter.
1301
01:15:28,790 --> 01:15:32,049
I just hope this doesn't
ruin our friendship.
1302
01:15:32,050 --> 01:15:33,479
Well, what's that about?
1303
01:15:33,480 --> 01:15:34,830
What do you think it's about?
This is a big deal!
1304
01:15:36,610 --> 01:15:37,869
What about a code of the ocean?
That's not on.
1305
01:15:37,870 --> 01:15:39,009
What about codes among men?
1306
01:15:39,010 --> 01:15:40,269
You don't sleep
with another man's girlfriend!
1307
01:15:40,270 --> 01:15:41,529
- Think of...
- Get out of here!
1308
01:15:41,530 --> 01:15:44,660
- All right, okay! All right!
- Get out of here!
1309
01:16:09,060 --> 01:16:09,970
Oh, God!
1310
01:16:31,370 --> 01:16:34,800
Koonu! This guy needs help! Koonu!
1311
01:16:37,930 --> 01:16:41,069
- Should I call the front desk?
- It hurts. It hurts.
1312
01:16:41,070 --> 01:16:43,459
Wow, you got coral right there in your leg!
1313
01:16:43,460 --> 01:16:45,019
Can you get it out of my leg, please,
hotel man?
1314
01:16:45,020 --> 01:16:46,149
Can you do something about that?
1315
01:16:46,150 --> 01:16:50,330
I'd love to, you know, but hotel policy...
They don't let me do that kind of thing.
1316
01:16:50,420 --> 01:16:52,419
They get all weirded out. Insurance...
1317
01:16:52,420 --> 01:16:54,419
Koonu, can you call
the front desk for me, please?
1318
01:16:54,420 --> 01:16:56,069
- Yeah.
- It really hurts.
1319
01:16:56,070 --> 01:16:59,069
Koonu, call the front desk now!
1320
01:16:59,070 --> 01:17:01,159
Okay, monster man.
1321
01:17:01,160 --> 01:17:03,069
Pete, he's not gonna do nothing.
1322
01:17:03,070 --> 01:17:05,029
I kind of have this thing
about blood, okay?
1323
01:17:05,030 --> 01:17:08,899
Look at it. It's raping my leg. Peter,
get it out of my fucking leg, please!
1324
01:17:08,900 --> 01:17:11,199
One, two.
1325
01:17:11,200 --> 01:17:13,379
- You can't get it out.
- It's really in there.
1326
01:17:13,380 --> 01:17:15,899
- Get it out of me!
- Three!
1327
01:17:15,900 --> 01:17:18,159
Fuck my arse!
1328
01:17:18,160 --> 01:17:21,079
Okay, I got it. It's all done.
It's all over.
1329
01:17:21,080 --> 01:17:22,560
Everything looks fine.
1330
01:17:25,770 --> 01:17:28,689
It's all good! They're coming wiki wiki.
1331
01:17:28,690 --> 01:17:32,860
Can you get some towels for me, please?
I'm really losing a lot of blood.
1332
01:17:33,080 --> 01:17:35,169
You sound like you're from London.
1333
01:17:35,170 --> 01:17:37,250
Yeah, I'm from London.
1334
01:17:42,690 --> 01:17:44,559
What's going on?
1335
01:17:44,560 --> 01:17:48,739
You fainted.
I didn't want you to wake up by yourself.
1336
01:17:48,740 --> 01:17:52,259
- How's your friend? Is he all right?
- Yeah.
1337
01:17:52,260 --> 01:17:54,779
They gave him stitches,
and he's sleeping it off.
1338
01:17:54,780 --> 01:17:56,959
- Hey, you wanna hear something funny?
- What?
1339
01:17:56,960 --> 01:17:59,259
Are you ready to laugh?
'Cause this is a gas.
1340
01:17:59,260 --> 01:18:00,609
Okay.
1341
01:18:00,610 --> 01:18:04,179
Edward Scissorhands over there told me
that you two were fucking each other
1342
01:18:04,180 --> 01:18:06,869
for a whole God damn year
while we were together.
1343
01:18:06,870 --> 01:18:07,999
Shit.
1344
01:18:08,000 --> 01:18:09,789
How about that, Sarah?
1345
01:18:09,790 --> 01:18:11,440
I'm sorry, Peter.
1346
01:18:12,700 --> 01:18:15,609
Pete, you shouldn't be up
and walking around. Can you please...
1347
01:18:15,610 --> 01:18:18,349
Please don't touch me.
Just don't touch me, okay?
1348
01:18:18,350 --> 01:18:20,089
I'm not touching you.
1349
01:18:20,090 --> 01:18:22,400
Will you just please sit? Please?
1350
01:18:23,440 --> 01:18:26,269
All right, I'll sit down,
but I'm sitting down 'cause I want to,
1351
01:18:26,270 --> 01:18:30,440
not because you've asked me to sit, okay?
1352
01:18:30,530 --> 01:18:31,790
Great.
1353
01:18:37,750 --> 01:18:38,970
A year?
1354
01:18:39,840 --> 01:18:42,529
Listen, I get it, okay? I just...
1355
01:18:42,530 --> 01:18:45,529
I need to understand what I did
to make you cheat. I just...
1356
01:18:45,530 --> 01:18:52,099
Pete, it's not anything you did.
1357
01:18:52,100 --> 01:18:55,969
You didn't do anything.
I mean, you were great.
1358
01:18:55,970 --> 01:18:58,799
Will you please cut the bullshit
and have a talk with me?
1359
01:18:58,800 --> 01:19:01,630
Fine. Cutting the bullshit.
1360
01:19:03,500 --> 01:19:05,889
It got really hard to keep taking care of you
when you stopped taking care of yourself.
1361
01:19:05,890 --> 01:19:07,149
I tried to get you out of the house.
1362
01:19:07,150 --> 01:19:12,019
I tried to get you off your little island
you loved so much, the couch.
1363
01:19:12,020 --> 01:19:13,799
You didn't wanna see the light of day!
1364
01:19:13,800 --> 01:19:17,980
God, there was one week
when you wore sweatpants! Every day.
1365
01:19:22,980 --> 01:19:26,550
You shall not pass!
1366
01:19:27,760 --> 01:19:31,029
You know what? If they were Sean John
sweatpants, it would have been fine.
1367
01:19:31,030 --> 01:19:34,239
But because they're Costco brand,
it's like the worst thing I could do.
1368
01:19:34,240 --> 01:19:37,809
That has nothing to do with it.
That's what you don't get.
1369
01:19:37,810 --> 01:19:41,639
I'm sorry that I didn't end up being
who we thought I was gonna be, you know?
1370
01:19:41,640 --> 01:19:46,549
I tried really hard. I promise you that.
I just didn't have it in me.
1371
01:19:46,550 --> 01:19:49,069
I think if you had just,
maybe tried harder.
1372
01:19:49,070 --> 01:19:51,469
I tried!
1373
01:19:51,470 --> 01:19:54,079
You have no idea how hard I tried, Peter.
1374
01:19:54,080 --> 01:19:55,729
I talked to a therapist.
1375
01:19:55,730 --> 01:19:58,119
I talked to my mother.
I read every book possible.
1376
01:19:58,120 --> 01:20:00,339
I took love seminars. I took sex seminars.
1377
01:20:00,340 --> 01:20:02,899
None of it worked.
None of it made a difference to you.
1378
01:20:02,900 --> 01:20:06,379
And I couldn't drown with you any more.
1379
01:20:06,380 --> 01:20:11,169
Don't you dare sit there
and tell me that I didn't try.
1380
01:20:11,170 --> 01:20:13,249
I did.
1381
01:20:13,250 --> 01:20:15,650
You were just too stupid to notice.
1382
01:20:48,610 --> 01:20:51,829
Whoa. I thought you were gonna wear
the shirt I got you.
1383
01:20:51,830 --> 01:20:53,609
What? No.
1384
01:20:53,610 --> 01:20:56,399
I mean, I do love that shirt you got me.
1385
01:20:56,400 --> 01:20:59,139
I admire Sir Tommy Bahama an awful lot.
1386
01:20:59,140 --> 01:21:02,960
He's a talented man, but tonight,
I feel that this is appropriate.
1387
01:21:08,180 --> 01:21:11,620
Wow, thank you. Yeah, Sarah got it for me.
1388
01:21:13,010 --> 01:21:16,230
This is, like, way more convenient
than my backpack.
1389
01:21:19,580 --> 01:21:20,789
Awesome hat!
1390
01:21:20,790 --> 01:21:22,879
Thank you.
Yeah, my girlfriend got it for me!
1391
01:21:22,880 --> 01:21:24,580
- I'm fucking with you!
- Cool!
1392
01:21:29,880 --> 01:21:32,580
Sarah, can I use this lipstick, please?
1393
01:21:37,580 --> 01:21:40,540
Sure. I don't care.
1394
01:21:43,240 --> 01:21:44,799
I think it looks great.
But if you're not, let's go change.
1395
01:21:44,800 --> 01:21:48,319
No, I like it. I didn't like it at first.
Now I really think it's...
1396
01:21:48,320 --> 01:21:50,109
Oh, bloody hell. This is a small resort.
1397
01:21:50,110 --> 01:21:51,590
Hi, Peter.
1398
01:21:53,890 --> 01:21:55,410
Hey. Wow.
1399
01:21:56,800 --> 01:21:59,069
Aldous, Sarah, this is Rachel.
1400
01:21:59,070 --> 01:22:01,679
Sarah bought me this shirt.
1401
01:22:01,680 --> 01:22:03,069
I could've guessed that. Yeah.
1402
01:22:03,070 --> 01:22:04,289
- Looks great.
- You look great.
1403
01:22:04,290 --> 01:22:06,289
Looks awesome.
1404
01:22:06,290 --> 01:22:08,459
- See.
- Thanks.
1405
01:22:08,460 --> 01:22:12,640
Mr Snow, I'm so sorry.
I did not know you guys were coming.
1406
01:22:12,720 --> 01:22:13,899
You're gonna have to wait five minutes.
1407
01:22:13,900 --> 01:22:15,029
I did not know you guys were coming.
1408
01:22:15,030 --> 01:22:16,809
It's okay. It's not a problem.
1409
01:22:16,810 --> 01:22:18,679
I didn't see you guys, so...
1410
01:22:18,680 --> 01:22:21,200
There's really no need to weep.
1411
01:22:21,900 --> 01:22:23,460
I'm not crying.
1412
01:22:24,940 --> 01:22:27,859
It's no problem, honestly.
It's not a problem.
1413
01:22:27,860 --> 01:22:30,989
- So, your table is ready, guys.
- Oh, great.
1414
01:22:30,990 --> 01:22:32,639
Hey, have a lovely evening, you two.
1415
01:22:32,640 --> 01:22:34,549
- Thank you. Have a great dinner, you guys.
- Thank you.
1416
01:22:34,550 --> 01:22:35,989
You're welcome to join us, obviously,
if you want.
1417
01:22:35,990 --> 01:22:37,859
- Okay.
- Wouldn't dream of it. What?
1418
01:22:37,860 --> 01:22:39,030
What?
1419
01:22:40,080 --> 01:22:41,949
- Oh, okay.
- Okay.
1420
01:22:41,950 --> 01:22:43,729
That's great. Awesome.
- Sure.
1421
01:22:43,730 --> 01:22:45,079
Great. I'll just set two more places.
1422
01:22:45,080 --> 01:22:46,209
- Okay.
- Not a big deal.
1423
01:22:46,210 --> 01:22:47,689
Awesome.
1424
01:22:47,690 --> 01:22:51,860
So this is actually happening.
We're gonna let this happen.
1425
01:22:52,470 --> 01:22:53,519
I am so sorry.
1426
01:22:53,520 --> 01:22:54,560
I never thought in a million years
she would say yes.
1427
01:22:56,520 --> 01:22:57,689
I did.
1428
01:22:57,690 --> 01:23:00,689
What? I just accepted an invitation.
I didn't wanna be rude.
1429
01:23:00,690 --> 01:23:02,469
It's got us in a terrible situation.
1430
01:23:02,470 --> 01:23:04,559
Now I'm gonna have to sit with him
wearing this shirt all night.
1431
01:23:04,560 --> 01:23:06,429
You're wearing the shirt regardless.
1432
01:23:06,430 --> 01:23:08,219
Australia is amazing.
1433
01:23:08,220 --> 01:23:11,779
- I'm telling you. It is a great place to shoot.
- Yeah?
1434
01:23:11,780 --> 01:23:15,089
Rachel, you would love it.
You would love it.
1435
01:23:15,090 --> 01:23:17,909
I wanna go. I really,
really wanna go there.
1436
01:23:17,910 --> 01:23:19,910
- Wait, so when's the movie coming out?
- Mmm.
1437
01:23:21,130 --> 01:23:23,129
It came out.
1438
01:23:23,130 --> 01:23:25,000
- It was already released.
- Oh.
1439
01:23:27,700 --> 01:23:29,699
Well, you know, it's an island.
1440
01:23:29,700 --> 01:23:30,829
It's isolated.
1441
01:23:30,830 --> 01:23:32,309
- Yeah.
- Movies don't really come out here.
1442
01:23:32,310 --> 01:23:35,009
- Obviously.
- Did you like it?
1443
01:23:35,010 --> 01:23:36,570
- The movie?
- Yeah.
1444
01:23:37,620 --> 01:23:39,919
- It was...
- Awful bloody film.
1445
01:23:39,920 --> 01:23:42,089
I say, it's just a ridiculous premise.
1446
01:23:42,090 --> 01:23:45,750
What would happen
if your mobile phone killed you?
1447
01:23:51,050 --> 01:23:52,749
I told her that when she read the script.
1448
01:23:52,750 --> 01:23:54,399
Yeah. You were the voice of reason, mate.
1449
01:23:54,400 --> 01:23:56,189
I tried to be, but she didn't listen.
1450
01:23:56,190 --> 01:23:59,009
Going around killing people.
A mobile phone, like, doing murders.
1451
01:23:59,010 --> 01:24:00,969
Why couldn't you just take the battery
out of the phone?
1452
01:24:00,970 --> 01:24:02,449
Right. That's it. The battle's over.
1453
01:24:02,450 --> 01:24:04,839
- Yeah, we've won.
I hated it.
1454
01:24:04,840 --> 01:24:06,929
Well, it's not for everyone, but it...
1455
01:24:06,930 --> 01:24:09,009
No, it's ridiculous.
Here's my favourite scene.
1456
01:24:09,010 --> 01:24:10,670
Ring-ring. Hello?
1457
01:24:11,490 --> 01:24:13,409
Right. It would never happen.
- Yeah.
1458
01:24:13,410 --> 01:24:14,839
No, it could never happen.
1459
01:24:14,840 --> 01:24:19,019
It's a metaphor for
addiction to technology.
1460
01:24:19,020 --> 01:24:23,189
For society,
for how we're reliant on technology.
1461
01:24:23,190 --> 01:24:24,319
I get it. I'm with you.
1462
01:24:24,320 --> 01:24:25,670
It's a metaphor for a crap movie.
1463
01:24:26,020 --> 01:24:28,189
Well, it was the right choice
for me at the time.
1464
01:24:28,190 --> 01:24:29,850
Sure.
- You know?
1465
01:24:42,370 --> 01:24:43,630
Well, this is awkward.
1466
01:24:47,890 --> 01:24:48,940
Yeah?
1467
01:24:49,680 --> 01:24:52,159
- It's a bit more awkward now.
A little.
1468
01:24:52,160 --> 01:24:55,199
Hey, excuse me.
Can we get another bottle of wine, please?
1469
01:24:55,200 --> 01:24:56,459
- Sure.
- Thank you.
1470
01:24:56,460 --> 01:24:57,589
Mr Snow?
1471
01:24:57,590 --> 01:24:59,979
Can I get cranberry juice
with a bit of lime in it, please.
1472
01:24:59,980 --> 01:25:01,679
Do you want cranberry juice
or cranberry cocktail?
1473
01:25:01,680 --> 01:25:04,289
Because I can probably rustle
up either one. Throw some OJ...
1474
01:25:04,290 --> 01:25:06,339
I don't care.
1475
01:25:06,340 --> 01:25:07,810
Okay, great.
1476
01:25:17,210 --> 01:25:19,600
Hey, can we get another bottle of wine?
1477
01:25:29,080 --> 01:25:31,169
If I've learned anything from addiction,
it's that,
1478
01:25:31,170 --> 01:25:35,779
you know, life is as brief as the
twinkling of a star over all too soon.
1479
01:25:35,780 --> 01:25:37,650
So if you're in a situation
where you're with a woman,
1480
01:25:40,040 --> 01:25:41,299
why not do the most interesting thing
that you can do in that situation?
1481
01:25:41,300 --> 01:25:43,779
And by which, I don't mean
have a conversation,
1482
01:25:43,780 --> 01:25:45,349
have a chin-wag, a bit of a chat.
1483
01:25:45,350 --> 01:25:48,779
Lose yourself in something
that's both ancient and perennial.
1484
01:25:48,780 --> 01:25:52,960
Find something eternal, perpetual.
Lose yourself in fuck.
1485
01:25:55,040 --> 01:25:57,349
I'm going to disagree.
1486
01:25:57,350 --> 01:25:58,779
Respectfully, of course, sir.
1487
01:25:58,780 --> 01:26:00,999
Maybe for you, that works.
1488
01:26:01,000 --> 01:26:04,219
For me, it's much more enjoyable
to get to know somebody.
1489
01:26:04,220 --> 01:26:05,919
If you end up sleeping with them,
that's great.
1490
01:26:05,920 --> 01:26:08,089
But I like getting to know somebody.
1491
01:26:08,090 --> 01:26:09,140
But he...
1492
01:26:09,660 --> 01:26:13,699
What he's saying is that
he's gonna stick it wherever he wants,
1493
01:26:13,700 --> 01:26:16,309
but he's joking.
1494
01:26:16,310 --> 01:26:18,089
I ain't. No, I'm not joking.
1495
01:26:18,090 --> 01:26:20,490
It's just what I believe, really.
1496
01:26:21,830 --> 01:26:23,399
So...
1497
01:26:23,400 --> 01:26:29,139
Just so we're clear and so I can hone in
on your central thesis of the night,
1498
01:26:29,140 --> 01:26:30,709
wade through all the bullshit,
1499
01:26:30,710 --> 01:26:33,529
you're telling me
that you think you have the right
1500
01:26:33,530 --> 01:26:36,229
to just fuck anyone, anywhere, anytime?
1501
01:26:36,230 --> 01:26:38,229
- Yes. There it is. That's right.
- That's what you're saying?
1502
01:26:38,230 --> 01:26:41,359
Not so eloquently
as you just put it, sweetheart.
1503
01:26:41,360 --> 01:26:42,799
But ultimately, yes, that is...
1504
01:26:42,800 --> 01:26:44,879
Oh, no! Not the shirt!
1505
01:26:44,880 --> 01:26:47,930
Take my eyes, but not the shirt. Mmm.
1506
01:26:48,450 --> 01:26:51,449
Yeah, that's pretty much
what I believe, Sarah.
1507
01:26:51,450 --> 01:26:54,059
When you're done making jokes,
are you gonna get a napkin?
1508
01:26:54,060 --> 01:26:56,579
Do you know what? I think I've improved it,
actually, against all odds.
1509
01:26:56,580 --> 01:26:57,929
I think I deserve a design award.
1510
01:26:57,930 --> 01:27:00,019
Please get some seltzer water.
1511
01:27:00,020 --> 01:27:02,410
- Garçon, could we get some...
- I saw it from farther away.
1512
01:27:04,280 --> 01:27:06,369
- Okay.
- Just lean back for a second.
1513
01:27:06,370 --> 01:27:08,149
No, it's all right. It's not there.
Let me...
1514
01:27:08,150 --> 01:27:09,589
You're very diligent. I appreciate it.
1515
01:27:09,590 --> 01:27:11,589
Let go of the glass now.
You're gonna have to walk away.
1516
01:27:11,590 --> 01:27:13,240
Bless you. There you are.
1517
01:27:13,590 --> 01:27:15,330
Oh, me, oh, my.
1518
01:27:16,280 --> 01:27:18,460
- Call the doctor.
- Oh, good.
1519
01:27:27,550 --> 01:27:29,719
- I love Hawaii.
- Is it good?
1520
01:27:29,720 --> 01:27:33,899
Yeah, it's nice,
but I think for like a week tops.
1521
01:27:33,900 --> 01:27:35,769
Any more than that, I know I'd go crazy,
1522
01:27:35,770 --> 01:27:39,639
because I think that
Hawaii is a place to escape
1523
01:27:39,640 --> 01:27:42,550
for people who can't deal
with the real world.
1524
01:27:44,860 --> 01:27:49,949
Yeah, you know, there's so few
personal shoppers and pet therapists.
1525
01:27:49,950 --> 01:27:52,160
Gosh, it's such a hard life.
1526
01:28:02,470 --> 01:28:04,120
I like living here.
1527
01:28:06,650 --> 01:28:09,560
- Anyone need any more vino?
- I think we're good.
1528
01:28:11,650 --> 01:28:13,519
I've a question for you real quick, Mr S.
1529
01:28:13,520 --> 01:28:16,869
I was actually meaning to ask you,
what did you exactly think of my demo?
1530
01:28:16,870 --> 01:28:19,339
Did you get it? Did you get it?
1531
01:28:19,340 --> 01:28:22,169
Oh, no. I was gonna listen to that,
1532
01:28:22,170 --> 01:28:25,300
but then I just carried on living my life.
1533
01:28:28,220 --> 01:28:29,559
Not at all?
1534
01:28:29,560 --> 01:28:33,569
No, I didn't, because, you know,
I go on my instincts,
1535
01:28:33,570 --> 01:28:35,220
and they weren't good.
1536
01:28:36,870 --> 01:28:40,829
You know what, dude?
Fuck you, okay? You can go fuck yourself.
1537
01:28:40,830 --> 01:28:42,829
I can't yell right now
because I'll get fired.
1538
01:28:42,830 --> 01:28:43,959
My boss will hear me,
1539
01:28:43,960 --> 01:28:45,959
and then I won't be able
to pay off my student loans.
1540
01:28:45,960 --> 01:28:48,869
But you know what? You're an asshole.
I fucking hate you.
1541
01:28:48,870 --> 01:28:50,009
I bought all your records.
1542
01:28:50,010 --> 01:28:52,829
This whole fucking time, I've been trying
to get you to come hang out with me.
1543
01:28:52,830 --> 01:28:57,010
I'm gonna have people fuck with your food
the rest of your trip, you fucking dick!
1544
01:28:57,220 --> 01:28:59,620
I like him. That was quite moving.
1545
01:29:15,060 --> 01:29:16,399
Wait, wait, wait.
1546
01:29:16,400 --> 01:29:18,190
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
1547
01:29:19,230 --> 01:29:21,489
Are you sure that you're not,
like, too drunk?
1548
01:29:21,490 --> 01:29:24,230
Jesus, would you stop being so sensitive.
1549
01:29:50,500 --> 01:29:51,540
Aldous.
1550
01:29:53,110 --> 01:29:54,539
Wake up.
1551
01:29:54,540 --> 01:29:57,279
- Aldous. Wake up.
- Hmm...
1552
01:29:57,280 --> 01:29:58,850
Make love to me.
1553
01:30:01,240 --> 01:30:03,110
All right. You go on top, though,
'cause I'm knackered.
1554
01:30:19,380 --> 01:30:20,510
Listen.
1555
01:30:22,940 --> 01:30:24,680
Yes! Yes!
1556
01:30:27,510 --> 01:30:29,599
- Yeah.
Yes!
1557
01:30:29,600 --> 01:30:31,160
- Oh, yes!
- Yeah!
1558
01:30:34,210 --> 01:30:36,250
- Yeah! Oh, God!
- Yeah!
1559
01:30:40,430 --> 01:30:41,989
- Right there!
- Yes!
1560
01:30:41,990 --> 01:30:44,509
- Yes!
- Yes! She's having an orgasm!
1561
01:30:44,510 --> 01:30:46,469
This is the best sex ever!
1562
01:30:46,470 --> 01:30:48,390
Yeah, all right, that'll do.
1563
01:30:48,990 --> 01:30:50,260
What?
1564
01:30:51,390 --> 01:30:53,260
I made a mistake coming here with you.
1565
01:30:57,040 --> 01:30:59,130
And I'm not done either!
1566
01:31:00,260 --> 01:31:02,349
- Please shut up! Okay.
- Okay!
1567
01:31:02,350 --> 01:31:04,649
You're still involved with him next door,
ain't you?
1568
01:31:04,650 --> 01:31:05,779
Excuse me?
1569
01:31:05,780 --> 01:31:07,649
You should've seen yourself
at dinner, Sarah.
1570
01:31:07,650 --> 01:31:11,830
Then we come back here,
and you put on that ghastly performance.
1571
01:31:12,130 --> 01:31:15,179
I mean, I've heard that
women do fake orgasms,
1572
01:31:15,180 --> 01:31:16,739
but I've never seen one.
1573
01:31:16,740 --> 01:31:18,519
It really deeply upset me.
1574
01:31:18,520 --> 01:31:19,870
You should have seen yourself at dinner.
1575
01:31:21,610 --> 01:31:25,790
"Oh, I'm Aldous Snow. Bullshit,
bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
1576
01:31:25,920 --> 01:31:28,009
"No, no drinks for me, thanks.
1577
01:31:28,010 --> 01:31:29,659
"Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit."
1578
01:31:29,660 --> 01:31:32,349
That's a really reductive impression.
1579
01:31:32,350 --> 01:31:34,879
If I wanted to see you act badly,
I'd just watch your TV show,
1580
01:31:34,880 --> 01:31:37,179
which, obviously, I can't now,
because it's been cancelled.
1581
01:31:37,180 --> 01:31:39,269
Oh, my God, you're such a prick.
1582
01:31:39,270 --> 01:31:40,399
And you know what?
1583
01:31:40,400 --> 01:31:43,529
Let me tell you something
about these tattoos, okay?
1584
01:31:43,530 --> 01:31:47,710
That is Buddhist. That is Nordic.
That is Hindu. That's just gibberish.
1585
01:31:47,790 --> 01:31:50,009
They are completely conflicting ideologies.
1586
01:31:50,010 --> 01:31:52,399
And that does not make you
a citizen of the world.
1587
01:31:52,400 --> 01:31:54,270
It makes you full of shit.
1588
01:31:57,800 --> 01:32:00,410
Was that genuine or did you fake that?
1589
01:32:02,410 --> 01:32:06,580
Right. I'm gonna probably clear off now.
1590
01:32:06,670 --> 01:32:08,229
I'll have a little sleep for a few hours,
1591
01:32:08,230 --> 01:32:12,100
then I'm gonna probably go
in the morning, okay?
1592
01:32:16,890 --> 01:32:19,109
I hate your music.
1593
01:32:19,110 --> 01:32:22,410
Yeah, well,
I fucked the housekeeper the other day.
1594
01:32:28,760 --> 01:32:30,460
Are you sleeping?
1595
01:32:31,280 --> 01:32:32,760
Not any more.
1596
01:32:38,290 --> 01:32:42,460
I know that I'm leaving in a couple
of days, so I don't even know
1597
01:32:44,420 --> 01:32:46,420
what the hell this means,
1598
01:32:49,940 --> 01:32:52,850
but I really like spending
time with you a lot.
1599
01:32:56,290 --> 01:32:57,990
I know. Me too.
1600
01:33:06,860 --> 01:33:07,770
Hey.
1601
01:33:14,030 --> 01:33:15,510
Good morning.
1602
01:33:18,300 --> 01:33:19,769
Where are you going?
1603
01:33:19,770 --> 01:33:23,209
The Korean Textile Manufacturer's Luau.
1604
01:33:23,210 --> 01:33:25,599
- Just kill me.
- Fun.
1605
01:33:25,600 --> 01:33:26,650
Joy.
1606
01:33:28,520 --> 01:33:32,170
I want you to know
that I meant what I said last night.
1607
01:33:33,520 --> 01:33:35,000
I know you did.
1608
01:33:36,260 --> 01:33:37,820
I did, too.
1609
01:33:40,300 --> 01:33:43,040
- Can I see you again tonight?
- Yeah.
1610
01:33:44,170 --> 01:33:46,040
- I get off at 7:00.
- Yay.
1611
01:33:46,870 --> 01:33:48,040
Bye.
1612
01:33:51,040 --> 01:33:52,389
Sir, morning mai tai.
1613
01:33:52,390 --> 01:33:54,389
You know what?
1614
01:33:54,390 --> 01:33:58,350
I actually will not be having
an alcoholic beverage this morning.
1615
01:34:25,880 --> 01:34:27,880
Jump! Jump! Jump!
- Don't make me do it.
1616
01:34:47,450 --> 01:34:49,450
Hey. Morning, mate.
1617
01:34:50,280 --> 01:34:54,019
- How are you today?
- Yeah, I'm good. I'm good. You okay?
1618
01:34:54,020 --> 01:34:56,239
Am I okay? I'm better than okay, my friend.
1619
01:34:56,240 --> 01:34:57,889
You seem sprightly.
1620
01:34:57,890 --> 01:34:59,150
I...
1621
01:34:59,760 --> 01:35:01,449
I had a great time last night.
1622
01:35:01,450 --> 01:35:04,889
- Congratulations. Well done. Well done.
- Thank you.
1623
01:35:04,890 --> 01:35:06,759
What about you? What's with the bag?
1624
01:35:06,760 --> 01:35:10,199
Right, yeah. I'm off back to England, mate.
1625
01:35:10,200 --> 01:35:11,679
Oh, you and Sarah are going to England.
1626
01:35:11,680 --> 01:35:14,070
No, no, no. I'm just going alone.
1627
01:35:14,890 --> 01:35:16,849
- Yeah.
- Did you guys have a fight or something?
1628
01:35:16,850 --> 01:35:20,499
Yeah, it was really... How you served
five years under her, I don't know.
1629
01:35:20,500 --> 01:35:25,199
You deserve a medal or a holiday
or at least a cuddle from somebody.
1630
01:35:25,200 --> 01:35:26,979
You were only here for a week.
1631
01:35:26,980 --> 01:35:29,159
Well, I don't know.
For me, that one week of it
1632
01:35:29,160 --> 01:35:33,859
was like going on holiday with,
I don't know, I wouldn't say Hitler,
1633
01:35:33,860 --> 01:35:37,289
but certainly Goebbels.
It was like a little holiday with Hitler.
1634
01:35:37,290 --> 01:35:38,769
Jesus.
1635
01:35:38,770 --> 01:35:42,289
Hey, listen, at least it's clear now
for you two to reconnect.
1636
01:35:42,290 --> 01:35:43,550
Oh...
1637
01:35:44,820 --> 01:35:47,119
No, no. No.
1638
01:35:47,120 --> 01:35:49,509
You know what?
I have a good thing going on with Rachel,
1639
01:35:49,510 --> 01:35:51,289
and I want to see that through.
1640
01:35:51,290 --> 01:35:54,819
Well, maybe you could have both of them.
Rachel and Sarah.
1641
01:35:54,820 --> 01:35:57,729
They got on all right, didn't
they, at dinner? So maybe...
1642
01:35:57,730 --> 01:36:00,249
You know what?
First of all, I'm not that kind of guy.
1643
01:36:00,250 --> 01:36:05,039
And even if I was, I don't think that I have
the sexual competency to really pull that off.
1644
01:36:05,040 --> 01:36:06,689
Yeah. It's a gift.
1645
01:36:06,690 --> 01:36:09,949
I will say,
if you do get back with Miss Marshall,
1646
01:36:09,950 --> 01:36:12,260
handle with care, because, you know...
1647
01:36:14,430 --> 01:36:16,209
Okay. Well, I think my ride's here.
1648
01:36:16,210 --> 01:36:18,999
So I'm gonna skedaddle then
before anything else happens to me.
1649
01:36:19,000 --> 01:36:20,689
Before life gets any more daft.
1650
01:36:20,690 --> 01:36:22,349
Is someone gonna take that?
1651
01:36:22,350 --> 01:36:24,960
Listen, don't let them grind you down.
1652
01:36:26,220 --> 01:36:27,569
Take it easy.
1653
01:36:27,570 --> 01:36:30,170
Hey, look at my driver.
I'm gonna have sex with her.
1654
01:36:34,740 --> 01:36:37,350
He said it was clear I wasn't over you.
1655
01:36:39,960 --> 01:36:41,829
And then he left.
1656
01:36:41,830 --> 01:36:43,310
Fucking prick.
1657
01:36:45,310 --> 01:36:48,619
And then I started thinking,
what if he's right?
1658
01:36:48,620 --> 01:36:51,530
What if I'm not over you?
1659
01:36:53,440 --> 01:36:56,360
- Sarah...
- Please just let me finish, Pete.
1660
01:37:03,310 --> 01:37:06,580
What if I made
a really, really horrible mistake?
1661
01:37:09,490 --> 01:37:13,670
- Sarah.
- Yeah?
1662
01:37:13,750 --> 01:37:16,269
Stop pulling my face towards your face.
1663
01:37:16,270 --> 01:37:18,149
Why?
1664
01:37:18,150 --> 01:37:19,799
You don't like it?
1665
01:37:19,800 --> 01:37:24,489
Listen, pulling my shirt towards you
is the same concept as pulling my face.
1666
01:37:24,490 --> 01:37:28,670
Let's spend one more night here together,
and then let's go home and then...
1667
01:37:28,760 --> 01:37:30,759
And we'll just pretend
like it never happened.
1668
01:37:30,760 --> 01:37:32,929
...face reality. No.
- That's the big plan?
1669
01:37:32,930 --> 01:37:34,719
No. I love you.
1670
01:37:34,720 --> 01:37:37,850
That's not fair.
That's not fair of you to say that to me.
1671
01:37:39,850 --> 01:37:41,280
Please, Peter.
1672
01:37:44,200 --> 01:37:46,720
- Tell me you're sorry.
- I'm so sorry.
1673
01:37:50,070 --> 01:37:51,590
I missed you.
1674
01:37:56,940 --> 01:37:57,980
I'm sorry.
1675
01:38:00,980 --> 01:38:02,980
God, I missed you, Peter.
1676
01:38:10,290 --> 01:38:11,200
All right.
1677
01:38:11,940 --> 01:38:15,379
Get hard for me, Pete. Get hard for me.
1678
01:38:15,380 --> 01:38:18,199
- I know what I'm supposed to do.
- Okay.
1679
01:38:18,200 --> 01:38:20,159
Just do it. Come on. Get hard.
1680
01:38:20,160 --> 01:38:21,949
- I'm trying.
- Okay.
1681
01:38:21,950 --> 01:38:23,810
- Here. Just let me do it for a second.
- Okay.
1682
01:38:26,030 --> 01:38:29,249
I really want you, Peter. I missed you.
1683
01:38:29,250 --> 01:38:30,729
You don't want help?
1684
01:38:30,730 --> 01:38:34,169
- You don't want help? Uh-huh.
- Can you be quiet just for a minute?
1685
01:38:34,170 --> 01:38:35,299
Do you want my hands?
1686
01:38:35,300 --> 01:38:38,520
Maybe just don't talk for a second
is what I mean.
1687
01:38:39,690 --> 01:38:41,249
Do you want my mouth?
1688
01:38:41,250 --> 01:38:43,730
- Yeah, maybe your mouth.
- Yeah. Okay.
1689
01:38:52,300 --> 01:38:54,909
What's the problem, Peter?
1690
01:38:54,910 --> 01:38:57,079
- I don't know...
- More?
1691
01:38:57,080 --> 01:38:59,390
You can keep trying if you want.
1692
01:39:03,870 --> 01:39:05,959
What's wrong with you?
1693
01:39:05,960 --> 01:39:08,129
- Nothing is wrong with me, okay?
- Okay.
1694
01:39:08,130 --> 01:39:10,219
- No, I didn't...
- Just, something doesn't feel right any more.
1695
01:39:10,220 --> 01:39:12,219
Okay. Well, did you... You know what?
1696
01:39:12,220 --> 01:39:14,389
Did you drink today?
Because sometimes when you drink...
1697
01:39:14,390 --> 01:39:15,959
Excuse me.
1698
01:39:15,960 --> 01:39:18,790
No, I haven't had anything to drink today.
1699
01:39:21,180 --> 01:39:25,879
Maybe the problem is that
you broke my heart into a million pieces,
1700
01:39:25,880 --> 01:39:29,619
and so my cock doesn't want
to be around you any more, okay?
1701
01:39:29,620 --> 01:39:30,660
Ever!
1702
01:39:32,750 --> 01:39:35,359
Because you know what I just realised?
Huh?
1703
01:39:35,360 --> 01:39:38,180
You're the God damn devil. Okay?
1704
01:39:42,880 --> 01:39:45,790
Wedding in Hawaii! Real original!
1705
01:39:56,750 --> 01:39:58,930
- Hey.
- Hey, Rachel.
1706
01:40:00,410 --> 01:40:03,489
- Sarah and Aldous broke up this morning.
- What a surprise.
1707
01:40:03,490 --> 01:40:06,230
So I went to check on Sarah, and...
1708
01:40:09,060 --> 01:40:11,539
Listen, I'm here
because I don't want to lie to you, okay?
1709
01:40:11,540 --> 01:40:13,539
Some stuff happened.
1710
01:40:13,540 --> 01:40:15,499
I'm really, really sorry that it did,
1711
01:40:15,500 --> 01:40:18,539
but I'm also really glad
that it did, because
1712
01:40:18,540 --> 01:40:23,110
I'm able to see so clearly now that Sarah
and I are not right for each other.
1713
01:40:24,370 --> 01:40:25,850
What stuff?
1714
01:40:28,020 --> 01:40:33,759
I went up to make sure that she was okay,
and it got weird.
1715
01:40:33,760 --> 01:40:35,629
But now everything is fine.
1716
01:40:35,630 --> 01:40:37,289
And I need you to understand
1717
01:40:37,290 --> 01:40:39,589
that I meant everything that I said
to you this morning.
1718
01:40:39,590 --> 01:40:40,849
What exactly happened, Peter?
1719
01:40:40,850 --> 01:40:42,509
We fooled around a little bit.
1720
01:40:42,510 --> 01:40:45,720
Shut the fuck up,
and tell me exactly what you did.
1721
01:40:47,420 --> 01:40:53,469
All right. I went to her room,
and she was crying and crying and crying.
1722
01:40:53,470 --> 01:40:55,639
And I felt like I should comfort her.
1723
01:40:55,640 --> 01:40:59,069
And then she started kissing me
because I was comforting her.
1724
01:40:59,070 --> 01:41:01,289
And then the next thing I knew,
I was kissing her
1725
01:41:01,290 --> 01:41:03,469
because she had been kissing me
because of the comforting.
1726
01:41:03,470 --> 01:41:07,340
Then she started taking my clothes off,
and then her clothes were off.
1727
01:41:10,470 --> 01:41:14,299
Then she performed
10 to 15 seconds of oral sex on me.
1728
01:41:14,300 --> 01:41:15,859
Okay. Peter, you can leave now.
1729
01:41:15,860 --> 01:41:18,599
- At the most. Maximum.
- Thank you for staying at Turtle Bay.
1730
01:41:18,600 --> 01:41:19,819
Rachel, please don't do this.
1731
01:41:19,820 --> 01:41:22,339
The only reason I'm telling you this
is because I really care about...
1732
01:41:22,340 --> 01:41:24,429
Listen to me, Peter.
1733
01:41:24,430 --> 01:41:27,559
I was a mess, too. I understand. Okay?
1734
01:41:27,560 --> 01:41:30,909
But it does not excuse
you acting like a complete asshole.
1735
01:41:30,910 --> 01:41:33,689
Listen, I know that
I fucked things up for a minute,
1736
01:41:33,690 --> 01:41:35,389
but I'm not like every other asshole.
1737
01:41:35,390 --> 01:41:39,039
You should not be with anybody right now.
1738
01:41:39,040 --> 01:41:40,260
Anybody.
1739
01:41:42,170 --> 01:41:44,129
I know...
1740
01:41:44,130 --> 01:41:45,779
I know that there is something here.
1741
01:41:45,780 --> 01:41:47,779
I know that I was not wrong about that.
1742
01:41:47,780 --> 01:41:51,660
And, yes, it's only been four days,
but I know you feel it, too.
1743
01:41:56,350 --> 01:41:58,090
I need you to leave.
1744
01:42:00,180 --> 01:42:04,050
Do not write me. Do not call me.
Do not e-mail me.
1745
01:42:09,880 --> 01:42:11,960
Peter, I need you to go.
1746
01:42:16,440 --> 01:42:18,440
I won't bother you any more.
1747
01:42:19,580 --> 01:42:20,840
I'm sorry.
1748
01:42:28,360 --> 01:42:30,230
I don't know what to do.
1749
01:42:38,230 --> 01:42:40,319
Hey, brother, what you doing, huh?
You stealing my art?
1750
01:42:40,320 --> 01:42:42,839
I want you to put it back right now.
Put it back, bro!
1751
01:42:42,840 --> 01:42:45,449
Listen, give me the picture.
1752
01:42:45,450 --> 01:42:47,839
Doo-doo paper.
You're throwing doo-doo paper?
1753
01:42:47,840 --> 01:42:49,500
Give me the picture.
1754
01:42:52,320 --> 01:42:55,669
Don't be stupid, brother.
Just give me the picture.
1755
01:42:55,670 --> 01:42:58,589
You can hit me as many times as you want.
I'm not giving you the photo back.
1756
01:42:58,590 --> 01:42:59,630
Oh, yeah.
1757
01:43:06,410 --> 01:43:09,940
No, no, no. Peter, I told you
I did not want to see you.
1758
01:43:29,330 --> 01:43:33,199
Aloha, I'm Sarah Marshall
from Crime Scene: Scene of the Crime.
1759
01:43:33,200 --> 01:43:34,859
And when I'm not scrubbing for evidence,
1760
01:43:34,860 --> 01:43:38,509
I'm flying Hawaiian Airlines
to my favourite destinations.
1761
01:43:38,510 --> 01:43:41,029
Now sit back
and enjoy your in-flight entertainment.
1762
01:43:41,030 --> 01:43:42,900
I know I will. Mahalo.
1763
01:43:43,510 --> 01:43:46,859
Everybody hates you
1764
01:43:46,860 --> 01:43:50,429
Everybody wishes that you were dead
1765
01:43:50,430 --> 01:43:52,079
Because, Peter, you suck
1766
01:43:52,080 --> 01:43:54,079
Peter, you suck
1767
01:43:54,080 --> 01:43:57,389
Peter, your music is fucking terrible
1768
01:43:57,390 --> 01:44:00,729
Peter, you suck
1769
01:44:00,730 --> 01:44:04,079
Peter, you don't do anything of value
1770
01:44:04,080 --> 01:44:05,649
Peter, you suck
1771
01:44:05,650 --> 01:44:09,820
Write some music but instead
you sit and write these bullshit songs
1772
01:44:10,130 --> 01:44:11,909
It's so self-loathing
1773
01:44:11,910 --> 01:44:15,219
Go see a psychiatrist
I hate the psychiatrist
1774
01:44:15,220 --> 01:44:16,779
Well, go see one anyway
1775
01:44:16,780 --> 01:44:18,259
I don't like the psychiatrist
1776
01:44:18,260 --> 01:44:19,909
You need to go and see one
1777
01:44:19,910 --> 01:44:21,479
See a psychiatrist
1778
01:44:21,480 --> 01:44:22,960
I'm not going
1779
01:44:58,710 --> 01:45:04,140
It's getting kind of hard to believe
things are going to get better
1780
01:45:51,160 --> 01:45:52,809
I don't understand
what there is to think about.
1781
01:45:52,810 --> 01:45:54,069
Because, D, he...
1782
01:45:54,070 --> 01:45:56,679
She licked the tip. That doesn't count.
1783
01:45:56,680 --> 01:45:59,509
- Of course it counts. He...
- He what?
1784
01:45:59,510 --> 01:46:03,159
He refused a blowjob
from his ex-girlfriend mid-blowjob.
1785
01:46:03,160 --> 01:46:06,159
Do you know what that's like for a man?
It's called blue balls, Rachel.
1786
01:46:06,160 --> 01:46:08,379
This guy is like Gandhi, but better.
1787
01:46:08,380 --> 01:46:09,509
He likes puppets.
1788
01:46:09,510 --> 01:46:10,460
I love puppets.
1789
01:46:12,210 --> 01:46:15,119
I love Fraggle Rock. I love Lamb Chop.
I love Elmo.
1790
01:46:15,120 --> 01:46:18,600
Sesame Street, Bert and Ernie,
Snuffelupagus. Fucks my shit up.
1791
01:46:22,860 --> 01:46:26,509
This is a song that
I never thought I would write
1792
01:46:26,510 --> 01:46:28,689
On the night I'm dying
1793
01:46:28,690 --> 01:46:31,819
Sorry for all the wrong I've done
1794
01:46:31,820 --> 01:46:33,689
I'm finished trying
1795
01:46:33,690 --> 01:46:38,909
It was a wonderful dream
Now let him come and slay me
1796
01:46:38,910 --> 01:46:40,559
There he is
1797
01:46:40,560 --> 01:46:43,299
The demon
who haunted the streets of London
1798
01:46:43,300 --> 01:46:44,949
I've come to slay you
1799
01:46:44,950 --> 01:46:46,649
Here I am!
1800
01:46:46,650 --> 01:46:49,129
I'll leave you bleeding in my dungeon
1801
01:46:49,130 --> 01:46:52,999
I'll never obey you
I'll rip out your oesophagus
1802
01:46:53,000 --> 01:46:57,869
Please, Mr Van Helsing
Listen to me
1803
01:46:57,870 --> 01:47:03,439
He is just a man who wishes to be free
1804
01:47:03,440 --> 01:47:06,649
Lay him in a hearse
You must end this curse
1805
01:47:06,650 --> 01:47:08,310
He is the worst!
1806
01:47:21,050 --> 01:47:24,359
Don't go my love
1807
01:47:24,360 --> 01:47:28,439
I can't say goodbye
1808
01:47:28,440 --> 01:47:32,309
My reign is done
1809
01:47:32,310 --> 01:47:37,530
It's time to die
1810
01:47:38,450 --> 01:47:40,229
I'm pregnant
1811
01:47:40,230 --> 01:47:42,009
Dracula
1812
01:47:42,010 --> 01:47:43,229
VAN HELSING: What have I done?
1813
01:47:43,230 --> 01:47:45,529
Has flown above
1814
01:47:45,530 --> 01:47:46,879
Who killed Dracula?
1815
01:47:46,880 --> 01:47:50,449
But he found a taste
1816
01:47:50,450 --> 01:47:53,449
A taste for love
1817
01:47:53,450 --> 01:47:56,189
My life is a lie
1818
01:47:56,190 --> 01:48:01,929
Sweet Dracula
I miss my young dead prince
1819
01:48:01,930 --> 01:48:06,110
I'll never see him again
1820
01:48:06,190 --> 01:48:08,669
Until my death
1821
01:48:08,670 --> 01:48:12,019
What a wonderful dream
1822
01:48:12,020 --> 01:48:17,669
To find a taste for love
1823
01:48:17,670 --> 01:48:24,020
A taste for love
1824
01:48:52,900 --> 01:48:56,860
Wow. You came.
I can't believe that you came.
1825
01:48:58,030 --> 01:48:59,989
Peter, this is great.
1826
01:48:59,990 --> 01:49:03,209
- It was really funny. Yeah.
- Thank you.
1827
01:49:03,210 --> 01:49:04,899
You know what?
I didn't realise that it was a comedy,
1828
01:49:04,900 --> 01:49:09,470
and then someone told me that, and it
just, like, opened the whole thing up.
1829
01:49:11,560 --> 01:49:14,989
- How long are you in town for?
- Open-ended.
1830
01:49:14,990 --> 01:49:16,169
- Bold.
- Yeah.
1831
01:49:16,170 --> 01:49:17,210
Yeah, you know, I'm kind of
checking out some schools.
1832
01:49:20,210 --> 01:49:22,820
- Congratulations.
- Yeah, maybe.
1833
01:49:26,040 --> 01:49:27,740
You never called.
1834
01:49:29,000 --> 01:49:32,300
You told me not to. And I listened.
1835
01:49:33,480 --> 01:49:35,739
- Right.
- Wasn't easy.
1836
01:49:35,740 --> 01:49:38,259
I might have called once and hung up.
1837
01:49:38,260 --> 01:49:40,780
- No. No.
- From a private number.
1838
01:49:41,610 --> 01:49:42,650
No.
1839
01:49:43,480 --> 01:49:44,609
Maybe.
1840
01:49:44,610 --> 01:49:46,999
Peter!
Nice job, Bretter.
1841
01:49:47,000 --> 01:49:48,259
Well, you should probably go back.
1842
01:49:48,260 --> 01:49:50,479
Would you like to hang out
while you're here?
1843
01:49:50,480 --> 01:49:52,959
- Maybe we could go to dinner or...
- Yeah.
1844
01:49:52,960 --> 01:49:55,349
- Still have my number?
- Yeah. Yeah, I'll call you.
1845
01:49:55,350 --> 01:49:58,089
- Go.
- Yeah, I should do that.
1846
01:49:58,090 --> 01:49:59,960
Yeah, yeah. Go mingle.
1847
01:50:04,140 --> 01:50:05,359
Hey, Peter!
Hey, Bretter!
1848
01:50:05,360 --> 01:50:07,139
Come over here and meet my mom!
1849
01:50:07,140 --> 01:50:09,839
- Go, go.
- Off I go.
1850
01:50:09,840 --> 01:50:11,619
- Hey, Peter.
- Nice job, Bretter.
1851
01:50:11,620 --> 01:50:13,619
The play was sick, man. Good work.
1852
01:50:13,620 --> 01:50:15,919
- Nice job.
- Good job, man. That was awesome.
1853
01:50:15,920 --> 01:50:17,049
So cool!
1854
01:50:17,050 --> 01:50:19,139
Peter, congratulations.
1855
01:50:19,140 --> 01:50:22,659
I just wanted to say thank you.
I had such a great time tonight.
1856
01:50:22,660 --> 01:50:25,189
Oh, good. You know what?
I'm gonna change out of this unitard,
1857
01:50:25,190 --> 01:50:27,059
- 'cause I'm getting a chafe. Okay.
- Enough said.
1858
01:50:27,060 --> 01:50:29,150
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
1859
01:50:55,110 --> 01:50:56,240
Hey, Peter?
1860
01:50:59,590 --> 01:51:03,020
I was just calling you.
1861
01:51:08,370 --> 01:51:10,550
- Wow.
- Oh, Peter.
1862
01:51:11,370 --> 01:51:14,290
- I'm sorry.
- Stop laughing.
1863
01:51:15,460 --> 01:51:17,640
Can you please stop laughing?
1864
01:51:19,810 --> 01:51:21,290
I missed you.
1865
01:51:22,330 --> 01:51:23,459
I just...
1866
01:51:23,460 --> 01:51:28,070
You know, I actually wanted to tell you
that I've been thinking so much about...
1867
01:52:18,650 --> 01:52:22,699
NARRATOR: This fall, Sarah Marshall is back
in a brand-new role.
1868
01:52:22,700 --> 01:52:26,569
Your wife had no enemies
that you're aware of.
1869
01:52:26,570 --> 01:52:29,259
Get ready for the most daring show
on television.
1870
01:52:29,260 --> 01:52:32,699
- Just came home, and she was lying there.
- Right.
1871
01:52:32,700 --> 01:52:35,960
In a world
where you don't know who to trust.
1872
01:52:39,490 --> 01:52:42,399
Charlie, who's Franco Marconi?
1873
01:52:42,400 --> 01:52:45,619
- No. No.
- Gun, gun, gun, gun. Drop it, drop it.
1874
01:52:45,620 --> 01:52:47,839
Go with your animal instincts.
1875
01:52:52,010 --> 01:52:55,310
- How did you know?
- She's an animal psychic.
1876
01:52:56,360 --> 01:52:59,620
Sarah Marshall returns on Animal Instincts.
1877
01:53:00,450 --> 01:53:01,799
Life's a bitch.
1878
01:53:01,800 --> 01:53:03,450
And where you're going,
that's exactly what you'll be.
139541