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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,195 --> 00:00:03,895 - Ooh, thats doubles. 2 00:00:03,897 --> 00:00:05,777 - Jesus Christ. 3 00:00:05,784 --> 00:00:07,224 Since when did our favorite coffee place 4 00:00:07,219 --> 00:00:08,719 become a suburban basement from the 80s? 5 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:09,990 - I know right? 6 00:00:09,988 --> 00:00:11,618 Its like beanbags and board games. 7 00:00:11,623 --> 00:00:13,063 You people are adults! 8 00:00:13,057 --> 00:00:14,627 - I saw an open chutes and ladders over there, 9 00:00:14,626 --> 00:00:16,326 and not a single ten-year-old to be found. 10 00:00:16,328 --> 00:00:18,158 - Jared from Subways worst nightmare. 11 00:00:18,163 --> 00:00:19,633 - What do you think haunts him more? 12 00:00:19,631 --> 00:00:21,631 His old giant jeans, or his actions? 13 00:00:21,633 --> 00:00:23,843 - Oh, you sunk my battleship. 14 00:00:23,835 --> 00:00:25,395 - You burst my aneurysm. 15 00:00:25,404 --> 00:00:28,074 - Fuck this ironic daycare center, okay? 16 00:00:28,072 --> 00:00:31,542 Is free personal space in this city too much to ask? 17 00:00:31,543 --> 00:00:32,943 - You can go back to the library. 18 00:00:32,944 --> 00:00:33,954 - Yeah, but youre just gonna hit on 19 00:00:33,945 --> 00:00:35,375 all the hot homeless guys. 20 00:00:35,380 --> 00:00:37,720 - Try to think of it as living al fresco. 21 00:00:37,716 --> 00:00:39,416 - Can you meet tomorrow? - I cant. 22 00:00:39,418 --> 00:00:42,148 I have to go to Yeshiva for my sister-in-laws graduation. 23 00:00:42,154 --> 00:00:45,164 Rucchel took a continuing ed class in Yiddish poetry. 24 00:00:45,157 --> 00:00:46,227 - Oh, good. 25 00:00:46,225 --> 00:00:47,685 - Well, shell never be out of work. 26 00:00:47,692 --> 00:00:49,032 Thats for sure. 27 00:00:49,027 --> 00:00:50,127 - Were not gonna get any work done. 28 00:00:50,129 --> 00:00:51,359 Do you want to see a movie? 29 00:00:51,363 --> 00:00:52,663 - Yeah, what should we see? 30 00:00:52,664 --> 00:00:54,174 - I dont know, Im sure Paul Feig 31 00:00:54,166 --> 00:00:55,666 has done an all-female reboot of something 32 00:00:55,667 --> 00:00:57,037 that he didnt ask me to audition for. 33 00:00:57,035 --> 00:00:58,635 - Oh, what about a gay "Gremlins"? 34 00:00:58,637 --> 00:00:59,937 - Ooh, what about a gay "Gremlins"? 35 00:00:59,938 --> 00:01:01,208 - Why havent they done that yet? 36 00:01:01,206 --> 00:01:02,566 - I dont know. Im listening. 37 00:01:02,574 --> 00:01:03,944 Tell me more. - Everyones so homophobic, 38 00:01:03,942 --> 00:01:05,142 cant do gay "Gremlins." 39 00:01:05,144 --> 00:01:06,154 - Hey, guys. 40 00:01:06,145 --> 00:01:07,645 You sticking around for Twister? 41 00:01:07,646 --> 00:01:08,676 I got to warn you though, turns into 42 00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:10,680 a real cuddle party sometimes. 43 00:01:13,585 --> 00:01:15,785 - Sorry. 44 00:01:15,787 --> 00:01:18,787 [driving punk rock music] 45 00:01:18,790 --> 00:01:20,230 ♪ ♪ 46 00:01:20,225 --> 00:01:21,625 - Hey, noods, I was almost to the train 47 00:01:21,626 --> 00:01:23,156 when I realized I forgot my squash stuff. 48 00:01:23,162 --> 00:01:25,162 [muffled moaning sounds, buzzing] 49 00:01:25,164 --> 00:01:26,704 Noodles? 50 00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:36,610 Waterbug? 51 00:01:36,608 --> 00:01:40,478 [buzzing] 52 00:01:40,479 --> 00:01:42,079 - Yes. 53 00:01:42,081 --> 00:01:43,011 Arthur. 54 00:01:44,416 --> 00:01:46,016 - Okay. 55 00:01:57,362 --> 00:02:00,302 [buzzing] 56 00:02:01,733 --> 00:02:04,443 RUCCHEL: Hurry up in there. Dont touch anything. 57 00:02:04,436 --> 00:02:05,966 Put paper on the seat. 58 00:02:05,970 --> 00:02:07,940 Renee, go block the door for your sister. 59 00:02:07,939 --> 00:02:09,369 - I dont want to. 60 00:02:09,374 --> 00:02:12,714 She always says, "pish, pish, pish" when she pees. 61 00:02:12,711 --> 00:02:13,781 I hate it. 62 00:02:13,778 --> 00:02:15,548 - Im pee shy. 63 00:02:15,547 --> 00:02:17,017 Like Uncle Billy. 64 00:02:17,015 --> 00:02:18,775 - Hey, that was told to you in confidence. 65 00:02:18,783 --> 00:02:22,093 - Tal, Renee, be gone. 66 00:02:22,087 --> 00:02:25,987 - This is so stupid. 67 00:02:25,990 --> 00:02:27,830 - What if we just drove away? 68 00:02:27,826 --> 00:02:29,526 - [chuckles] 69 00:02:29,528 --> 00:02:30,898 Billy, you hungry? 70 00:02:30,895 --> 00:02:32,325 Why dont you get yourself a tuna sandwich 71 00:02:32,331 --> 00:02:33,201 from the cooler? 72 00:02:33,198 --> 00:02:34,768 Weve got kasha varniskas. 73 00:02:34,766 --> 00:02:36,296 Weve got Hydrox cookies. 74 00:02:36,301 --> 00:02:38,741 - Its a ten minute drive. Im fine. 75 00:02:38,737 --> 00:02:41,067 - Do you realize what a schlemiel your brother is? 76 00:02:41,072 --> 00:02:43,242 - I knew he worked at Hasenpfeffer Incorporated, 77 00:02:43,242 --> 00:02:45,042 but I never knew-- - My graduating class 78 00:02:45,043 --> 00:02:46,983 was supposed to have our poetry reading 79 00:02:46,978 --> 00:02:49,208 Thursday night, but Garry screwed up 80 00:02:49,214 --> 00:02:50,984 booking the venue, and now its canceled. 81 00:02:50,982 --> 00:02:52,352 It was so simple. 82 00:02:52,351 --> 00:02:54,251 A community center, a restaurant. 83 00:02:54,253 --> 00:02:56,293 - Rucchel, if you want, you can do your show 84 00:02:56,288 --> 00:02:57,558 at the café. 85 00:02:57,556 --> 00:02:59,516 Just please stop verbally castrating my brother 86 00:02:59,524 --> 00:03:00,764 in front of me. 87 00:03:00,759 --> 00:03:02,289 - Thank you, Billy. 88 00:03:02,294 --> 00:03:04,264 - Thats very nice. Thank you, Billy. 89 00:03:04,263 --> 00:03:05,563 - For Chrissake. 90 00:03:05,564 --> 00:03:07,274 [horn honks] 91 00:03:07,266 --> 00:03:10,096 Jesus. 92 00:03:10,102 --> 00:03:13,112 You girls better be fucking kidnapped! 93 00:03:13,105 --> 00:03:15,305 - Garry, is everything with you and Rucchel okay? 94 00:03:15,307 --> 00:03:17,407 - What? Yeah, were fine. 95 00:03:17,409 --> 00:03:19,279 Its just marriage, you know. 96 00:03:19,278 --> 00:03:20,848 - I dont know how you dont tell her to back off. 97 00:03:20,845 --> 00:03:22,205 I would have to. 98 00:03:22,214 --> 00:03:23,624 Cool that you can just roll over 99 00:03:23,615 --> 00:03:25,175 and eat shit, I guess. 100 00:03:25,184 --> 00:03:28,094 RUCCHEL: Lets move, before I go full Casey Anthony. 101 00:03:28,087 --> 00:03:29,087 BILLY: What did you say you got in here? 102 00:03:29,088 --> 00:03:31,758 Like tuna or something? 103 00:03:31,756 --> 00:03:33,126 JULIE: Knock, knock! 104 00:03:33,125 --> 00:03:34,425 Hi. 105 00:03:34,426 --> 00:03:37,596 I brought your stuff for your squash game tonight. 106 00:03:37,596 --> 00:03:42,826 You left it at home in the bedroom earlier. 107 00:03:42,834 --> 00:03:44,074 - Thank you. 108 00:03:44,068 --> 00:03:45,738 - Youre welcome. 109 00:03:45,737 --> 00:03:47,067 - Okay, well, uh, 110 00:03:47,071 --> 00:03:48,671 Ill see you later, 111 00:03:48,673 --> 00:03:51,143 uh, in the apartment. 112 00:03:51,143 --> 00:03:53,083 - Yes. - Where we live. 113 00:03:53,077 --> 00:03:55,977 - Yep. Im gonna go. 114 00:03:55,980 --> 00:03:59,350 - Bye. - Bye. 115 00:03:59,351 --> 00:04:01,851 [sighs] Ladies room, ladies room, 116 00:04:01,853 --> 00:04:04,263 office, office, 117 00:04:04,256 --> 00:04:07,726 everybodys got an office besides me. 118 00:04:07,726 --> 00:04:09,556 Must be nice. 119 00:04:13,565 --> 00:04:17,565 Empty office... 120 00:04:17,569 --> 00:04:21,169 Hello, baby. 121 00:04:21,173 --> 00:04:23,213 - And Arthur said we can use this office? 122 00:04:23,208 --> 00:04:27,378 - Well, todays an awkward day to ask Arthur anything. 123 00:04:27,379 --> 00:04:29,179 He caught me watching porn this morning. 124 00:04:29,181 --> 00:04:31,281 - Really? - Yeah. 125 00:04:31,283 --> 00:04:33,023 And now Im worried about his feelings. 126 00:04:33,017 --> 00:04:34,817 Well, worried is a little strong. 127 00:04:34,819 --> 00:04:37,189 Im worried that the world will never really appreciate 128 00:04:37,189 --> 00:04:38,719 how great of a singer Ann Wilson is. 129 00:04:38,723 --> 00:04:41,133 Im concerned about Arthurs feelings. 130 00:04:41,126 --> 00:04:42,556 - You know, once Garry caught me watching porn, 131 00:04:42,561 --> 00:04:44,061 and ever since then, he tries to set me up 132 00:04:44,062 --> 00:04:45,502 with Latin cab drivers. 133 00:04:45,497 --> 00:04:47,227 - I guess Arthur didnt expect the porn I watch 134 00:04:47,232 --> 00:04:49,832 to be quite as crowded. 135 00:04:49,834 --> 00:04:51,374 - Well, yeah, I mean, you watch 136 00:04:51,370 --> 00:04:53,000 some really fucked-up shit. 137 00:04:53,004 --> 00:04:54,844 - If Im not horrified and offended 138 00:04:54,839 --> 00:04:57,239 the minute Im done with it, I dont bother seeking it out. 139 00:04:57,242 --> 00:04:59,112 - You know, I do like the audition ones, though, 140 00:04:59,111 --> 00:05:01,151 you know, the ones where, like, a guy shows up 141 00:05:01,146 --> 00:05:02,576 thinking hes gonna have sex with a girl, 142 00:05:02,581 --> 00:05:04,551 and then he gets there, and the directors like, 143 00:05:04,549 --> 00:05:06,619 "Well, the girl never showed up, 144 00:05:06,618 --> 00:05:10,918 but my buddy Trevors already here, so..." 145 00:05:10,922 --> 00:05:12,522 - You know who I hate are those guys 146 00:05:12,524 --> 00:05:14,334 who think theyre so feminist because they jerk off 147 00:05:14,326 --> 00:05:16,696 to porn starring women with natural breasts 148 00:05:16,695 --> 00:05:17,795 and a big bush. 149 00:05:17,796 --> 00:05:19,096 Like, congratulations. 150 00:05:19,098 --> 00:05:21,028 - Ooh, are you talking about porn? 151 00:05:21,032 --> 00:05:23,572 I love the cartoon category on those sites. 152 00:05:23,568 --> 00:05:25,438 You know, sex should have whimsy. 153 00:05:25,437 --> 00:05:27,237 Its so fun and fanciful to watch Lilo 154 00:05:27,239 --> 00:05:29,209 get punch-fucked by Stitch or George Jetson 155 00:05:29,208 --> 00:05:30,438 with a mouthful of his dogs-- 156 00:05:30,442 --> 00:05:31,742 - Matthew, why havent you drowned 157 00:05:31,743 --> 00:05:33,313 in Bryan Singers pool yet? 158 00:05:33,312 --> 00:05:35,312 - I have a hard time watching porn without seeing 159 00:05:35,314 --> 00:05:37,084 the work that goes into it. 160 00:05:37,082 --> 00:05:38,982 You guys know Ive been in a few, right? 161 00:05:38,983 --> 00:05:40,453 - What? - Are you serious? 162 00:05:40,452 --> 00:05:43,362 - Well, yeah, my screen name was Blade Stallion. 163 00:05:43,355 --> 00:05:47,655 I was in "Thundercocks 4" and "You Want It Where: Rio." 164 00:05:47,659 --> 00:05:48,859 Saw a lot of the world, man. 165 00:05:48,860 --> 00:05:50,400 Well, saw a lot of Rio. 166 00:05:50,395 --> 00:05:52,395 Me and India Summer still play Words with Friends. 167 00:05:52,397 --> 00:05:54,297 - I am googling Blade Stallion. 168 00:05:54,299 --> 00:05:56,539 - Already there, and may I say, 169 00:05:56,535 --> 00:05:59,095 compliments to the chef. 170 00:05:59,104 --> 00:06:00,644 - Mine was bigger. 171 00:06:02,907 --> 00:06:04,107 BILLY: This place is perfect. 172 00:06:04,109 --> 00:06:05,479 Should we get a coffee machine? 173 00:06:05,477 --> 00:06:07,407 - Lets get two so theres never a line. 174 00:06:07,412 --> 00:06:08,652 - Yes. 175 00:06:08,647 --> 00:06:10,077 All right, Im going to the restroom. 176 00:06:10,082 --> 00:06:11,682 What happens if I run into Arthur? 177 00:06:11,683 --> 00:06:14,453 - We have to come in on off hours so that we dont. 178 00:06:14,453 --> 00:06:15,823 - Got it. 179 00:06:15,820 --> 00:06:19,290 [cell phone ringing] 180 00:06:19,291 --> 00:06:21,231 - Hey, Julie, its your mother. 181 00:06:21,226 --> 00:06:23,756 Listen, I need you take a moment out of your day 182 00:06:23,762 --> 00:06:25,162 and do something for me. 183 00:06:25,164 --> 00:06:26,604 One of my patients has a daughter 184 00:06:26,598 --> 00:06:28,368 who just graduated from college, and she wants 185 00:06:28,367 --> 00:06:29,767 to get into show business. 186 00:06:29,768 --> 00:06:31,538 - I dont want to answer a millenials 187 00:06:31,536 --> 00:06:32,796 career questions. 188 00:06:32,804 --> 00:06:34,244 - And Im not saying youve accomplished 189 00:06:34,239 --> 00:06:36,069 enough to be giving anyone advice, 190 00:06:36,074 --> 00:06:38,444 but the truth is, my practice has been 191 00:06:38,443 --> 00:06:40,183 in a bit of a dip lately. 192 00:06:40,179 --> 00:06:41,679 I dont know why. 193 00:06:41,680 --> 00:06:43,680 Ive been texting far less during sessions. 194 00:06:43,682 --> 00:06:44,952 - So what? 195 00:06:44,949 --> 00:06:48,419 - Please, Julie, see the girl, for me. 196 00:06:48,420 --> 00:06:50,920 - Yes, fine, just dont call me again 197 00:06:50,922 --> 00:06:51,922 during office hours. 198 00:06:51,923 --> 00:06:53,363 - You have a job? 199 00:06:53,358 --> 00:06:55,188 MAN: Okay, were here at your destination. 200 00:06:55,194 --> 00:06:57,404 The fare is $45. 201 00:06:57,396 --> 00:06:59,456 MAN: But I dont have any money. 202 00:06:59,464 --> 00:07:01,904 MAN: Then Im gonna have to fuck you, faggot. 203 00:07:01,900 --> 00:07:03,640 - An unexpected turn. 204 00:07:03,635 --> 00:07:05,435 [knock at door] 205 00:07:07,772 --> 00:07:09,312 Garry. - Billy. 206 00:07:09,308 --> 00:07:10,778 - What are you doing here? 207 00:07:10,775 --> 00:07:13,745 - I told Rucchel to back off. 208 00:07:13,745 --> 00:07:15,105 - And? 209 00:07:15,114 --> 00:07:17,824 - Well, I got a new lease on life. 210 00:07:17,816 --> 00:07:21,116 And you just got a new roommate. 211 00:07:24,723 --> 00:07:27,033 - I told her to back off, just like you said. 212 00:07:27,025 --> 00:07:28,255 - No, I didnt say that. 213 00:07:28,260 --> 00:07:29,890 When did I say that? Did I say that? 214 00:07:29,894 --> 00:07:31,304 No, no, no, no, Garry, 215 00:07:31,296 --> 00:07:33,196 you have to call her and apologize. 216 00:07:33,198 --> 00:07:34,468 - And eat more shit? 217 00:07:34,466 --> 00:07:35,266 No way. 218 00:07:35,267 --> 00:07:37,067 That Yiddish poetry class 219 00:07:37,068 --> 00:07:39,138 has just opened a Pandoras box 220 00:07:39,138 --> 00:07:41,468 of womens liberations meshuggahs. 221 00:07:41,473 --> 00:07:43,213 Now Im a bachelor, 222 00:07:43,208 --> 00:07:44,608 and so is my baby brother. 223 00:07:44,609 --> 00:07:45,939 Weve got to go out on the town, 224 00:07:45,944 --> 00:07:47,014 just like the skit. 225 00:07:47,011 --> 00:07:48,351 Remember the skit? 226 00:07:48,347 --> 00:07:51,177 "Too Wild and Crazy Two and a Half Men." 227 00:07:51,183 --> 00:07:53,553 - That wasnt it. 228 00:07:53,552 --> 00:07:55,122 - So your brother moved in with you, 229 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:57,620 and he didnt have the decency to give us fair warning 230 00:07:57,622 --> 00:08:00,292 so we could pitch this as a multi-cam to CBS? 231 00:08:00,292 --> 00:08:01,732 - Julie, I am in hell. 232 00:08:01,726 --> 00:08:04,256 He talked all night about how he wanted to go out 233 00:08:04,263 --> 00:08:06,433 and party like its 1999, 234 00:08:06,431 --> 00:08:08,431 which makes me still in the closet at home, 235 00:08:08,433 --> 00:08:09,533 you know, wondering how they they were 236 00:08:09,534 --> 00:08:11,174 gonna wrap up "Just Shoot Me!" 237 00:08:11,170 --> 00:08:13,810 I got, like, two hours of sleep last night. 238 00:08:13,805 --> 00:08:15,005 - Me too. 239 00:08:15,006 --> 00:08:16,036 Actually, thats not true. 240 00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:17,640 I got nine and a half. 241 00:08:17,642 --> 00:08:19,312 But its still super awkward between me and Arthur 242 00:08:19,311 --> 00:08:21,111 since he freaked out over that jizz festival 243 00:08:21,113 --> 00:08:22,283 he caught me watching. 244 00:08:22,281 --> 00:08:23,551 WOMAN: [clears throat] 245 00:08:23,548 --> 00:08:26,018 So did you have any advice, or... 246 00:08:26,017 --> 00:08:27,817 - Oh, right. Youre here. 247 00:08:27,819 --> 00:08:30,619 - Yeah, um, my mom is friends with your mom. 248 00:08:30,622 --> 00:08:33,762 She said that you guys work in show business. 249 00:08:33,758 --> 00:08:35,788 Any tips? 250 00:08:35,794 --> 00:08:37,034 I have a friend, 251 00:08:37,028 --> 00:08:40,198 shes got an internship at "The Tonight Show." 252 00:08:40,199 --> 00:08:42,069 - Isnt it funny how Jimmy Fallon 253 00:08:42,066 --> 00:08:43,296 slowly turned "The Tonight Show" 254 00:08:43,302 --> 00:08:44,742 into a childrens birthday party? 255 00:08:44,736 --> 00:08:46,736 - Last night, he played pin the tail on the donkey 256 00:08:46,738 --> 00:08:47,908 with Pussy Riot. 257 00:08:47,906 --> 00:08:49,266 - Right? 258 00:08:49,274 --> 00:08:50,444 Those games are a blast. 259 00:08:50,442 --> 00:08:52,342 Id love to intern there. 260 00:08:54,446 --> 00:08:55,846 BILLY: Oh, really? - Mm-hmm. 261 00:08:55,847 --> 00:08:58,717 - So youd like to work for free? 262 00:08:58,717 --> 00:08:59,947 - Id love to. 263 00:08:59,951 --> 00:09:01,291 - We have an intern! 264 00:09:01,286 --> 00:09:03,956 Finally we can boss someone around. 265 00:09:03,955 --> 00:09:05,285 - Okay, I-nez? 266 00:09:05,290 --> 00:09:06,990 - "Inez." - I-nez? 267 00:09:06,991 --> 00:09:08,261 - "Inez." - I-nez. 268 00:09:08,260 --> 00:09:09,790 - "Inez." - Ined. 269 00:09:09,794 --> 00:09:12,204 - I have to say it like Ined. - Just Inez is fine. 270 00:09:12,197 --> 00:09:13,967 JULIE: Thats a hard S? - Inez. 271 00:09:13,965 --> 00:09:15,895 - Inez, were gonna need you to get us meetings. 272 00:09:15,900 --> 00:09:18,800 Were gonna need you to get us generals, okay? 273 00:09:18,803 --> 00:09:20,173 - And pitches. 274 00:09:20,172 --> 00:09:22,912 We need to be pitching constantly. 275 00:09:22,907 --> 00:09:24,837 - Mm-hmm. - Do you understand, Inez? 276 00:09:24,843 --> 00:09:27,583 - And get a menu book, okay, with options. 277 00:09:27,579 --> 00:09:29,749 - Yeah. I need healthy options. 278 00:09:29,748 --> 00:09:30,848 I need ingredients. 279 00:09:30,849 --> 00:09:32,419 Im gonna make my own salad, Inez. 280 00:09:32,417 --> 00:09:33,547 - Hes gonna make his own salad, Inez. 281 00:09:33,552 --> 00:09:35,122 - Whos gonna stop me, you? 282 00:09:35,120 --> 00:09:36,490 - Youre gonna get a menu, and its gonna have 283 00:09:36,488 --> 00:09:38,218 a make your own salad option. 284 00:09:38,223 --> 00:09:40,933 Theres gonna be proteins, nuts and grains, seeds... 285 00:09:40,925 --> 00:09:43,325 - I want a nut, and I want it green, Inez. 286 00:09:43,328 --> 00:09:45,528 - Legumes, Inez. - I want an avocado. 287 00:09:45,530 --> 00:09:47,670 - Do you know what an avocado is, Inez? 288 00:09:47,666 --> 00:09:48,826 - No. 289 00:09:48,833 --> 00:09:50,603 - Its a guacamole ingredient, Inez, 290 00:09:50,602 --> 00:09:52,242 and he wants it in his salad. 291 00:09:52,237 --> 00:09:54,567 Its also very impor-- I notice 292 00:09:54,573 --> 00:09:56,073 youre not writing any of this down. 293 00:09:56,074 --> 00:09:57,514 BILLY: Is it in your head? 294 00:09:57,509 --> 00:09:59,509 - Its very important that you coordinate 295 00:09:59,511 --> 00:10:01,451 our schedules so that we dont run into Arthur. 296 00:10:01,446 --> 00:10:03,216 Whos Arthur? My boyfriend. 297 00:10:03,215 --> 00:10:04,345 He works here. 298 00:10:04,349 --> 00:10:06,349 - Um, do I get a desk? 299 00:10:06,351 --> 00:10:08,121 both: No! - You dont get a desk. 300 00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:09,550 Jesus Christ! - Youre gonna sit on the floor. 301 00:10:09,554 --> 00:10:10,724 - Talk about an entitled generation. 302 00:10:10,722 --> 00:10:12,362 - Youre gonna sit on the floor. 303 00:10:12,357 --> 00:10:14,087 - You are gonna love sitting on the floor. 304 00:10:14,093 --> 00:10:16,263 - Mm. - Im sorry? 305 00:10:16,261 --> 00:10:17,801 - [stutters] 306 00:10:17,796 --> 00:10:20,526 - By the way, this is just you just paying your dues. 307 00:10:20,532 --> 00:10:22,772 - Yeah, we all did this, Inez. - We all did this. 308 00:10:22,767 --> 00:10:24,467 You shouldve seen what I went through. 309 00:10:24,469 --> 00:10:25,999 - He interned for Conan. 310 00:10:26,004 --> 00:10:27,274 - Whos Conan? 311 00:10:27,272 --> 00:10:29,412 - Oh, my God! - What? 312 00:10:29,408 --> 00:10:30,878 What is wrong with you? 313 00:10:30,875 --> 00:10:32,205 "Whos Conan?" 314 00:10:32,211 --> 00:10:33,681 - Oh, you mean James Corden? 315 00:10:33,678 --> 00:10:35,878 - Is that supposed to be a joke? 316 00:10:37,649 --> 00:10:40,389 Mom, why are we at the Museum of Sex? 317 00:10:40,385 --> 00:10:41,915 - Since my client load has lessened 318 00:10:41,920 --> 00:10:43,520 and your father went away on that conference, 319 00:10:43,522 --> 00:10:45,322 Ive been visiting every museum in the city 320 00:10:45,324 --> 00:10:46,594 in alphabetical order. 321 00:10:46,591 --> 00:10:48,691 Were up to S, Museum of Sex. 322 00:10:48,693 --> 00:10:49,893 Here we are. 323 00:10:49,894 --> 00:10:51,764 - Right in front of the medieval nipple clamps 324 00:10:51,763 --> 00:10:54,133 and the vibrators from steampunk times 325 00:10:54,133 --> 00:10:55,873 you had to plug into a wall. 326 00:10:55,867 --> 00:10:59,397 - You know, Ive never been with an uncircumcised man. 327 00:10:59,404 --> 00:11:00,814 Well, not sexually, of course. 328 00:11:00,805 --> 00:11:02,305 Ive shared an elevator with Tomas, 329 00:11:02,307 --> 00:11:03,807 my old doorman. 330 00:11:03,808 --> 00:11:05,778 - I beg that you stop talking about this. 331 00:11:05,777 --> 00:11:08,847 - Marital aids. [chuckles] 332 00:11:08,847 --> 00:11:10,477 Give me a break. 333 00:11:10,482 --> 00:11:12,582 Any idiot knows the only marital aid 334 00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:15,094 that really works is keeping an open dialogue 335 00:11:15,087 --> 00:11:16,187 with your partner. 336 00:11:16,188 --> 00:11:17,718 Secrets ruin couples. 337 00:11:17,722 --> 00:11:19,392 - Mom, Arthur and I had a-- 338 00:11:19,391 --> 00:11:22,591 - Those people that wont talk or listen to one another. 339 00:11:22,594 --> 00:11:24,204 - Mom-- - I mean, there are two people 340 00:11:24,196 --> 00:11:25,756 in every conversation, one, two. 341 00:11:25,764 --> 00:11:27,734 - So-- - Give your partner a chance 342 00:11:27,732 --> 00:11:29,402 to speak. - I had a question about-- 343 00:11:29,401 --> 00:11:32,001 - Thats why Im good at what I do. 344 00:11:32,003 --> 00:11:33,443 - Good talk, Mom. 345 00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:39,110 Arthur, please, would you stop being weird about this? 346 00:11:39,111 --> 00:11:40,381 - Im not being weird. 347 00:11:40,379 --> 00:11:41,909 Im reading Jonathan Franzen. 348 00:11:41,913 --> 00:11:44,553 Youre the one watching your little secret movies. 349 00:11:44,549 --> 00:11:46,749 - Just because I can compartmentalize 350 00:11:46,751 --> 00:11:48,951 doesnt mean Im hiding secrets. 351 00:11:48,953 --> 00:11:51,363 I just think that theres a time and a place for porn 352 00:11:51,356 --> 00:11:53,056 and a time and a place for loving, 353 00:11:53,057 --> 00:11:55,487 get-to-the-point intercourse with the person 354 00:11:55,494 --> 00:11:57,434 who makes omelets for you. 355 00:11:57,429 --> 00:11:59,529 - If its not a secret, show me the porn 356 00:11:59,531 --> 00:12:00,701 you like to watch. 357 00:12:00,699 --> 00:12:02,029 Maybe Ill like it too. 358 00:12:02,033 --> 00:12:04,503 - I dont think thats a good idea. 359 00:12:04,503 --> 00:12:06,213 Okay, okay, okay, okay, fine. 360 00:12:06,205 --> 00:12:08,465 But if I show you mine, you have to show me yours. 361 00:12:08,473 --> 00:12:10,143 I want to see your porn too, okay? 362 00:12:10,142 --> 00:12:14,052 - Sure. Sounds fun. 363 00:12:14,045 --> 00:12:16,975 [moaning sounds] 364 00:12:21,320 --> 00:12:24,460 [screaming] 365 00:12:25,690 --> 00:12:28,460 I thought you were a feminist. 366 00:12:28,460 --> 00:12:30,030 Okay, okay. 367 00:12:30,028 --> 00:12:32,498 Do you guarantee that what I just saw 368 00:12:32,497 --> 00:12:33,967 is not at all what you want in bed? 369 00:12:33,965 --> 00:12:35,265 - Of course not. 370 00:12:35,267 --> 00:12:36,537 Youre not a football team, 371 00:12:36,535 --> 00:12:38,165 and I havent been abducted. 372 00:12:38,170 --> 00:12:39,170 Now its your turn. 373 00:12:39,171 --> 00:12:40,171 Fair is fair. 374 00:12:40,172 --> 00:12:41,272 You show me your porn now. 375 00:12:41,273 --> 00:12:44,343 - Okay. 376 00:12:44,343 --> 00:12:46,283 - Aw, the sweater drawer. 377 00:12:46,278 --> 00:12:47,878 - Mm-hmm. 378 00:12:52,016 --> 00:12:53,346 Et voila. 379 00:12:53,352 --> 00:12:55,452 - Aw, you still like magazines. 380 00:12:55,454 --> 00:12:57,424 - Medium was impressed upon me in my youth. 381 00:12:57,422 --> 00:13:00,562 - "Redhead Fever"? 382 00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:03,099 "Pale Babes In Their Mid-30s"? 383 00:13:03,095 --> 00:13:05,395 "Jewish Girls with Big Naturals"? 384 00:13:05,397 --> 00:13:08,167 Arthur, all these girls look like me. 385 00:13:08,167 --> 00:13:09,627 - Well, this girl doesnt look like you. 386 00:13:09,634 --> 00:13:11,004 She has a tattoo. 387 00:13:11,002 --> 00:13:12,972 - I showed you a brutal gangbang video, 388 00:13:12,971 --> 00:13:15,011 and youre showing me this quaint 389 00:13:15,006 --> 00:13:16,676 parade of doppelgangers? 390 00:13:16,675 --> 00:13:18,675 - Im sorry I like looking at naked redheads 391 00:13:18,677 --> 00:13:20,247 in their 30s who went to Hebrew school. 392 00:13:20,245 --> 00:13:21,775 - Ugh! 393 00:13:21,780 --> 00:13:23,180 - Im sure plenty of girls would be thrilled 394 00:13:23,182 --> 00:13:24,952 that their boyfriends like porn that bears 395 00:13:24,949 --> 00:13:27,089 a proximate resemblance to their real partners 396 00:13:27,086 --> 00:13:28,486 or their actual sex life. 397 00:13:28,487 --> 00:13:30,717 - Porn that resembles your actual sex life 398 00:13:30,722 --> 00:13:33,162 is like going to a foreign land and eating 399 00:13:33,158 --> 00:13:34,728 at a chain restaurant. 400 00:13:34,726 --> 00:13:37,056 Youre in Morocco. Youre on safari with Ken Burns. 401 00:13:37,061 --> 00:13:39,461 Why the fuck are you at a Burger King? 402 00:13:39,464 --> 00:13:42,474 - I dont need to be yelled at for liking what I like. 403 00:13:44,769 --> 00:13:46,469 Im sorry if my sexual peccadilloes 404 00:13:46,471 --> 00:13:48,041 are too bland for you. 405 00:13:48,039 --> 00:13:50,509 - And Im sorry that I like masturbating 406 00:13:50,509 --> 00:13:52,479 to filthy, disgusting garbage. 407 00:13:55,180 --> 00:13:57,780 - Wait, so "Juggy, Jewish Gingers" is a real magazine? 408 00:13:57,782 --> 00:13:59,552 Graydon Carter must be branching out. 409 00:13:59,551 --> 00:14:01,651 - Im just concerned that maybe me and Arthur 410 00:14:01,653 --> 00:14:03,263 not liking the same porn is underlying 411 00:14:03,255 --> 00:14:05,355 some bigger differences I didnt know we had. 412 00:14:05,357 --> 00:14:08,157 - Well, look, just please dont break up right now. 413 00:14:08,160 --> 00:14:09,430 Garry kept me up all night. 414 00:14:09,428 --> 00:14:10,958 He took out our high school yearbook, 415 00:14:10,962 --> 00:14:13,602 and he was going through it and ranking the girls 416 00:14:13,598 --> 00:14:15,228 by caboose. 417 00:14:15,234 --> 00:14:16,304 - Jesus. 418 00:14:16,301 --> 00:14:17,641 Inez, wheres the menu book? 419 00:14:17,636 --> 00:14:19,266 - I already put in your dinner order. 420 00:14:19,271 --> 00:14:21,171 - Yeah, well, were gonna need a second dinner also. 421 00:14:21,173 --> 00:14:23,483 Did you start a Seamless account with your credit card 422 00:14:23,475 --> 00:14:24,575 like we asked you to do? 423 00:14:24,576 --> 00:14:26,076 - Um, yes, uh... 424 00:14:26,077 --> 00:14:27,407 You guys are gonna reimburse me-- 425 00:14:27,412 --> 00:14:29,152 - Hey, quick question, Inez. 426 00:14:29,148 --> 00:14:31,078 Whats with all the clicking and clacking on the keyboard? 427 00:14:31,083 --> 00:14:32,223 - Hmm, yes. 428 00:14:32,217 --> 00:14:33,447 Its not the clicking I mind so much 429 00:14:33,452 --> 00:14:34,952 as the clacking. 430 00:14:34,953 --> 00:14:36,563 - Its the clacking. Its the clacking. 431 00:14:36,555 --> 00:14:39,155 - Im just taking notes for this thing Im writing. 432 00:14:39,158 --> 00:14:41,658 - Oh, a thing youre writing, like, for yourself? 433 00:14:41,660 --> 00:14:43,630 - Oh, hello, Eve. 434 00:14:43,628 --> 00:14:45,528 - Hi, Inez, hi. 435 00:14:45,530 --> 00:14:47,770 Inez, let me make one thing clear. 436 00:14:47,766 --> 00:14:49,096 When youre in our office, 437 00:14:49,101 --> 00:14:50,641 you dont work on your own bullcrap. 438 00:14:50,635 --> 00:14:51,965 - No, if you need something to do, 439 00:14:51,970 --> 00:14:54,210 get us some more generals on the calendar. 440 00:14:54,206 --> 00:14:56,536 - We got to get Garry back together with Rucchel. 441 00:14:56,541 --> 00:14:57,741 Its not gonna be easy. 442 00:14:57,742 --> 00:14:59,712 Rucchel is one of those stubborn 443 00:14:59,711 --> 00:15:02,281 tiny Jewish women who take everything 444 00:15:02,281 --> 00:15:03,721 as a personal offense. 445 00:15:03,715 --> 00:15:05,375 - Well, then well just find a stubborner 446 00:15:05,384 --> 00:15:07,494 tinier Jewish-er woman whos always on the defensive 447 00:15:07,486 --> 00:15:09,816 cause shes only thinking about herself all the time. 448 00:15:09,821 --> 00:15:11,261 - Who are we gonna find thats tough enough 449 00:15:11,256 --> 00:15:13,656 and who has the time to deal with all of that? 450 00:15:13,658 --> 00:15:15,628 - You know, this alphabetical tour of museums 451 00:15:15,627 --> 00:15:17,427 has really broadened by horizons. 452 00:15:17,429 --> 00:15:20,869 Who knew there were six floors at the Museum of Tarps? 453 00:15:20,865 --> 00:15:22,925 - So, Mom, we need your help. 454 00:15:22,934 --> 00:15:25,874 - Yeah, my brother and his wife are having marital problems. 455 00:15:25,870 --> 00:15:28,140 - And you came to me? 456 00:15:28,140 --> 00:15:30,780 This is just the boost I needed. 457 00:15:30,775 --> 00:15:33,775 Oh, isnt it funny how your own children 458 00:15:33,778 --> 00:15:36,578 dont know what you need, but you did, Billy. 459 00:15:36,581 --> 00:15:39,421 You did. 460 00:15:39,418 --> 00:15:44,218 WOMAN: ♪ I love it when you call me baby, baby ♪ 461 00:15:44,223 --> 00:15:47,093 - Billy, come here. Watch me nae nae! 462 00:15:47,092 --> 00:15:50,762 - No. 463 00:15:50,762 --> 00:15:53,902 WOMAN: ♪ Knew that there was something special ♪ 464 00:15:53,898 --> 00:15:57,598 ♪ When I looked into your eyes ♪ 465 00:15:57,602 --> 00:15:59,972 ♪ It was magic ♪ 466 00:15:59,971 --> 00:16:01,741 ♪ Cant stop, cant stop ♪ 467 00:16:01,740 --> 00:16:03,510 ♪ Baby, whatd you do to me ♪ 468 00:16:03,508 --> 00:16:05,038 ♪ Feeling so in love ♪ 469 00:16:05,043 --> 00:16:06,853 ♪ Ooh, you making me believe ♪ 470 00:16:06,845 --> 00:16:08,605 ♪ Hope when we kiss, God ♪ 471 00:16:08,613 --> 00:16:10,653 ♪ Youll wake me from this fantasy ♪ 472 00:16:10,649 --> 00:16:13,649 ♪ From this fantasy ♪ 473 00:16:13,652 --> 00:16:15,252 ♪ Cant stop ♪ 474 00:16:15,254 --> 00:16:18,524 ♪ You know I cant stop, know I cant stop ♪ 475 00:16:18,523 --> 00:16:20,493 ♪ You know I cant stop ♪ 476 00:16:20,492 --> 00:16:22,392 ♪ Cant stop ♪ 477 00:16:22,394 --> 00:16:23,534 ♪ Whoa-oh-oh ♪ 478 00:16:23,528 --> 00:16:26,698 ♪ Whoa-oh-oh, ooh-ooh ♪ 479 00:16:26,698 --> 00:16:28,468 ♪ We cant stop ♪ 480 00:16:28,467 --> 00:16:29,727 - [screams] - Ah! What? 481 00:16:29,734 --> 00:16:31,004 What are you doing here? 482 00:16:31,002 --> 00:16:32,572 - Im on time according to the schedule 483 00:16:32,571 --> 00:16:34,041 you made me make. 484 00:16:34,038 --> 00:16:35,768 - Well, I didnt ask you to do anything, Inez. 485 00:16:35,774 --> 00:16:38,684 No one made you do anything. 486 00:16:38,677 --> 00:16:40,377 - Are you homeless? 487 00:16:40,379 --> 00:16:42,109 - No, Im not homeless. 488 00:16:42,114 --> 00:16:42,954 - Im sorry. 489 00:16:42,947 --> 00:16:44,347 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, 490 00:16:44,349 --> 00:16:46,649 what the hell are you doing in my office? 491 00:16:46,651 --> 00:16:48,251 - Oh, my God, its Ken Burns. 492 00:16:51,690 --> 00:16:53,530 - I go away for ten days with my crew, 493 00:16:53,525 --> 00:16:55,185 and I come back, and I find this squatter 494 00:16:55,194 --> 00:16:56,734 in my office. 495 00:16:56,728 --> 00:16:58,428 - Your office? 496 00:16:58,430 --> 00:16:59,860 - Mr. Burns, I am so sorry, 497 00:16:59,864 --> 00:17:01,774 but I have to say, Im Billy Epstein. 498 00:17:01,766 --> 00:17:03,766 Im a huge fan. 499 00:17:03,768 --> 00:17:06,238 - I, too, am a huge fan of your work. 500 00:17:06,238 --> 00:17:07,808 - Inez, dont talk to Ken Burns. 501 00:17:07,806 --> 00:17:10,176 - Yes, sir. 502 00:17:10,175 --> 00:17:11,775 I love "The Ken Burns Effect" so much. 503 00:17:11,776 --> 00:17:12,936 - Get out. 504 00:17:12,944 --> 00:17:14,484 - Get out! Did you hear Ken Burns? 505 00:17:14,479 --> 00:17:17,279 He said get out. - Both of you. 506 00:17:17,282 --> 00:17:18,752 - God damn it, Inez. 507 00:17:21,220 --> 00:17:23,920 - You were right about sex and porn. 508 00:17:23,922 --> 00:17:26,162 - Lets keep kosher. 509 00:17:26,158 --> 00:17:28,158 Sex is something we enjoy together, 510 00:17:28,160 --> 00:17:30,660 but porn should stay private. 511 00:17:30,662 --> 00:17:33,602 - Privacy is good. Secrets are bad. 512 00:17:33,598 --> 00:17:35,468 - Yeah. Hey. 513 00:17:35,467 --> 00:17:38,067 I have a third dinner that I brought home from work. 514 00:17:38,069 --> 00:17:41,709 Do you want to fuck again and then split it? 515 00:17:41,706 --> 00:17:43,406 - Youre goddamn right I do. 516 00:17:47,546 --> 00:17:49,976 - Thank you for helping me move the stuff out of my office, 517 00:17:49,981 --> 00:17:52,681 well, Ken Burns office. 518 00:17:52,684 --> 00:17:56,124 - Billy, how do you get caught sleeping in the office 519 00:17:56,121 --> 00:17:58,391 of Americas most beloved documentarian? 520 00:17:58,390 --> 00:17:59,960 I mean, you should know better than that. 521 00:17:59,958 --> 00:18:01,288 - No, I shouldnt. 522 00:18:01,293 --> 00:18:03,103 Youre the brother that knows better. 523 00:18:03,095 --> 00:18:05,195 Garry, I know youre trying to put up a big front 524 00:18:05,197 --> 00:18:06,927 about how much you like being single, 525 00:18:06,931 --> 00:18:08,731 but I hear you snore-crying at night. 526 00:18:08,733 --> 00:18:10,273 Be honest. 527 00:18:10,269 --> 00:18:12,669 - I guess I just get embarrassed. 528 00:18:12,671 --> 00:18:14,141 You know, you always say that I roll over 529 00:18:14,139 --> 00:18:15,909 and eat shit and all that. 530 00:18:15,907 --> 00:18:17,237 And I dont know, Im your older brother. 531 00:18:17,242 --> 00:18:19,112 I want you to think Im cool. 532 00:18:19,111 --> 00:18:26,051 - Garry, I am never going to think youre cool ever. 533 00:18:26,050 --> 00:18:27,590 Ever. 534 00:18:27,586 --> 00:18:31,116 So you can just let that go. 535 00:18:31,123 --> 00:18:32,663 - I think I miss Rucchel. 536 00:18:32,657 --> 00:18:34,257 - Yes! Yes! 537 00:18:34,259 --> 00:18:35,389 Oh, thank God. 538 00:18:35,394 --> 00:18:37,534 Yes, Garry, of course you miss Rucchel. 539 00:18:37,529 --> 00:18:39,259 You and Rucchel belong together. 540 00:18:39,264 --> 00:18:43,804 Youre like challah and a plate. 541 00:18:43,802 --> 00:18:45,202 - Ha, ha. 542 00:18:45,204 --> 00:18:47,274 - So youre gonna come with me tomorrow 543 00:18:47,272 --> 00:18:49,842 to Rucchels poetry show at the cafe, 544 00:18:49,841 --> 00:18:51,181 and you have to talk to her. 545 00:18:51,176 --> 00:18:53,576 So what does Rucchel like that you do? 546 00:18:53,578 --> 00:18:56,418 - She likes it when I dust off the front of the TV. 547 00:18:56,415 --> 00:18:58,515 She thinks its funny cause it doesnt really do anything. 548 00:18:58,517 --> 00:19:00,417 Shes like, "Youre just moving dust around." 549 00:19:00,419 --> 00:19:05,059 What if I bring the TV in and dust it off in front of her? 550 00:19:05,056 --> 00:19:06,926 I mean, its huge. 551 00:19:06,925 --> 00:19:08,955 - All right, this is not a productive conversation. 552 00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:12,960 [rock music] 553 00:19:12,964 --> 00:19:15,274 Hey, thank you so much for doing this. 554 00:19:15,267 --> 00:19:16,637 Garry will be here in a second. 555 00:19:16,635 --> 00:19:18,165 - Which one is Rucchel? 556 00:19:18,170 --> 00:19:19,900 - Shes the one whose resting face is somewhere 557 00:19:19,904 --> 00:19:23,584 between a withering scowl and a suffering grimace. 558 00:19:23,575 --> 00:19:25,775 - Im gonna need you to be a lot more specific. 559 00:19:25,777 --> 00:19:28,277 - Shes right over there in the corner setting up the mic. 560 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:30,120 - You can do it, Mom. - I know. 561 00:19:32,984 --> 00:19:35,194 Hi, Rucchel? 562 00:19:35,187 --> 00:19:37,187 Im Dr. Marilyn Kessler. 563 00:19:37,189 --> 00:19:39,959 Im a therapist and relationship expert. 564 00:19:39,958 --> 00:19:42,528 I also testify in court on behalf of cases 565 00:19:42,527 --> 00:19:44,697 involving mental illness, but this isnt 566 00:19:44,696 --> 00:19:46,026 about my extensive résumé. 567 00:19:46,030 --> 00:19:47,500 - What do you want? 568 00:19:47,499 --> 00:19:49,729 - I understand you and your husband have separated, 569 00:19:49,734 --> 00:19:51,474 and I can help you. 570 00:19:51,470 --> 00:19:54,840 - I dont see how my marriage is any of your fucking business. 571 00:19:54,839 --> 00:19:58,109 - Look, I have no personal investment in the situation. 572 00:19:58,110 --> 00:19:59,780 Ive got a husband. 573 00:19:59,778 --> 00:20:03,248 - Oh, excuse me? - Excuse me. 574 00:20:03,248 --> 00:20:05,178 - Excuse me? - Excuse me. 575 00:20:05,184 --> 00:20:07,224 - Excuse me? - Excuse me? 576 00:20:07,219 --> 00:20:09,619 - Excuse me! - Excuse me. 577 00:20:09,621 --> 00:20:11,521 - Excuse me? - Excuse me. 578 00:20:11,523 --> 00:20:13,393 both: Excuse me. 579 00:20:13,392 --> 00:20:14,962 - I think you heard me. 580 00:20:14,959 --> 00:20:16,699 - Listen, you Bergdorf bitch. 581 00:20:16,695 --> 00:20:18,895 The only reason Garry doesnt live with us anymore 582 00:20:18,897 --> 00:20:20,697 is because he diminishes my accomplishments 583 00:20:20,699 --> 00:20:23,239 and told me to back off in front of our children. 584 00:20:23,235 --> 00:20:25,195 - He did what? - Yep. 585 00:20:25,204 --> 00:20:27,644 - And after I graduated, did he ever lift 586 00:20:27,639 --> 00:20:30,179 one of his fat hairy fingers to write me a note 587 00:20:30,175 --> 00:20:32,635 or send flowers or say, "Mazel tov, Rucchel"? 588 00:20:32,644 --> 00:20:36,254 - You graduated from a continuing education program, 589 00:20:36,248 --> 00:20:38,748 and he didnt buy you flowers? 590 00:20:38,750 --> 00:20:40,250 - Not even a fucking carnation. 591 00:20:40,252 --> 00:20:42,352 - Oh, that piece of shit. 592 00:20:42,354 --> 00:20:44,524 - Hello, ladies. - Here he is, 593 00:20:44,523 --> 00:20:46,193 Garry the piece of shit. 594 00:20:46,191 --> 00:20:49,661 - Oh, hello, Garry, you piece of shit. 595 00:20:49,661 --> 00:20:53,601 I hope you came here to say something to your wife. 596 00:20:53,598 --> 00:20:55,428 - I did. 597 00:20:55,434 --> 00:20:58,644 Rucchel, please, please take me back. 598 00:20:58,637 --> 00:21:00,537 I did something stupid. 599 00:21:00,539 --> 00:21:02,609 And if you could tell me just how stupid 600 00:21:02,607 --> 00:21:05,237 over and over and over for the rest of my life, 601 00:21:05,244 --> 00:21:09,454 Id be the happiest schlimazel in all of Suffolk County. 602 00:21:09,448 --> 00:21:15,588 - Rucchel, I want you to look in Garrys eyes, 603 00:21:15,587 --> 00:21:20,927 and I want you tell him, "I want you back." 604 00:21:24,263 --> 00:21:26,133 - Yeah, sure, come back. Whatever. 605 00:21:30,602 --> 00:21:32,302 - My work is done. 606 00:21:37,609 --> 00:21:41,409 - My poem is dedicated to my husband, Garry. 607 00:21:41,413 --> 00:21:43,883 Hes stupid, but Im not gonna do any better. 608 00:21:43,882 --> 00:21:46,622 Look at me. 609 00:21:46,618 --> 00:21:50,718 A dybbuk, a dybbuk, a dybbuk, a dybbuk. 610 00:21:50,722 --> 00:21:54,062 Oh, yes, I swear. I wouldnt fib-buk. 611 00:21:54,058 --> 00:21:55,388 - Whats a dybbuk? 612 00:21:55,394 --> 00:21:57,564 - Oh, its like a Jewish demon. 613 00:21:57,562 --> 00:21:58,832 - Think Jill Zarin. 614 00:21:58,830 --> 00:22:00,200 - You know, I met a Jewish once. 615 00:22:00,199 --> 00:22:01,769 I was doing a production of "Fiddler," 616 00:22:01,766 --> 00:22:04,236 broke my ankle, and Im pretty sure the doctor was one. 617 00:22:04,236 --> 00:22:08,206 - Shut the fuck up! 618 00:22:08,207 --> 00:22:13,747 Dybbuk, dybbuk, dybbuk. 619 00:22:13,745 --> 00:22:15,545 Thank you. 620 00:22:15,547 --> 00:22:19,117 [applause] 621 00:22:19,118 --> 00:22:20,548 - Congratulations, Mom. 622 00:22:20,552 --> 00:22:22,652 You saved a marriage. Youre back in business. 623 00:22:22,654 --> 00:22:24,124 - Its what I do. 624 00:22:24,123 --> 00:22:26,363 By the way, Julie, I want to thank you very much 625 00:22:26,358 --> 00:22:28,588 for helping my patients daughter, Inez. 626 00:22:28,593 --> 00:22:31,163 I dont know what kind of advice you gave her, 627 00:22:31,163 --> 00:22:33,173 but she is doing great. 628 00:22:33,165 --> 00:22:35,365 - Really? - She sold a novel. 629 00:22:35,367 --> 00:22:37,697 Its like a "Devil Wears Prada" kind of thing 630 00:22:37,702 --> 00:22:39,102 about a job from hell. 631 00:22:39,104 --> 00:22:40,574 Its got a cute title. 632 00:22:40,572 --> 00:22:43,182 "Ginger and the Queen." 633 00:22:43,175 --> 00:22:45,035 - Which one am I? 634 00:22:45,043 --> 00:22:46,913 - Here you go, tapshoe. 635 00:22:46,911 --> 00:22:48,981 - Oh, Arthur, Ive been meaning to tell you, 636 00:22:48,980 --> 00:22:50,480 you might be hearing from Ken Burns, 637 00:22:50,482 --> 00:22:53,192 and if you do, just ignore it. 638 00:22:53,185 --> 00:22:55,215 Ken Burns, everyone knows is like a huge liar. 639 00:22:55,220 --> 00:22:58,660 Yeah, he has a problem. He lies, so just... 640 00:22:58,657 --> 00:23:00,127 - Hey. 641 00:23:00,125 --> 00:23:01,485 Great job, Rucchel. 642 00:23:01,493 --> 00:23:03,233 You can come back any time you want to do 643 00:23:03,228 --> 00:23:05,358 more Jewish poems. 644 00:23:05,364 --> 00:23:08,574 - Garry, Garry, look. Look who it is, look. 645 00:23:08,567 --> 00:23:09,967 - Oh, my God. 646 00:23:09,968 --> 00:23:11,838 Thundercock himself. 647 00:23:11,836 --> 00:23:14,066 Blade Stallion, right? - Yeah. 648 00:23:14,072 --> 00:23:17,112 - You have brought so much joy to our marriage. 649 00:23:17,109 --> 00:23:18,339 - Oh, thank you. 650 00:23:18,343 --> 00:23:20,153 - I could quote your movies. 651 00:23:20,145 --> 00:23:22,505 But I wont, but I could. 652 00:23:22,514 --> 00:23:23,854 But I wont. 653 00:23:23,848 --> 00:23:24,918 But I could. 654 00:23:24,916 --> 00:23:26,446 - My name is Marilyn Kessler, 655 00:23:26,451 --> 00:23:29,251 and now, with no musical accompaniment, 656 00:23:29,254 --> 00:23:33,294 Id like to sing "Send in the Clowns." 657 00:23:35,994 --> 00:23:39,004 [driving punk rock music] 658 00:23:38,997 --> 00:23:47,137 ♪ ♪ 46955

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