All language subtitles for Attack.Of.The.Killer.Shrews.2016.WEBRip.x264-ION10
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1
00:00:01,310 --> 00:00:02,172
[explosion]
2
00:00:10,310 --> 00:00:11,103
[sizzling]
3
00:00:21,965 --> 00:00:22,655
[intense]
4
00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:31,689
[spooky music]
5
00:02:38,827 --> 00:02:40,344
[music starts to fade]
6
00:02:46,241 --> 00:02:47,068
Ahh!
7
00:02:47,931 --> 00:02:49,206
[heavy breathing]
8
00:02:52,103 --> 00:02:55,241
This is the most frightening
movie, and these are only
9
00:02:55,241 --> 00:02:58,827
the opening credits! I don't
know what I'm gonna do!
10
00:03:00,896 --> 00:03:04,344
Greetings from Tromaville!
I'm Lloyd Kaufman, president
of Troma Entertainment and
11
00:03:04,344 --> 00:03:06,793
creator of the Toxic Avenger.
12
00:03:08,793 --> 00:03:12,310
And the film you are about
to see is probably one of the
most horrifying, and downright
13
00:03:14,241 --> 00:03:19,206
bloodcurdling creations that
I have ever witnessed in my
fifty years of Troma filmmaking!
14
00:03:21,793 --> 00:03:26,793
Yep! The Killer Shrews!
A movie about redemption,
hope... and ice cream.
15
00:03:29,103 --> 00:03:34,103
Ah, yes. The year was
1959. Eisenhower was
president. Communism was
flourishing, the music
16
00:03:38,689 --> 00:03:43,689
was dying... and I... I
was getting out of prison.
I'll never forget it.
17
00:03:46,034 --> 00:03:49,620
And who could forget those
wonderful dogs wearing mops?!
18
00:03:51,068 --> 00:03:53,620
And I know mops. Just ask
ol' lumpy head back there.
19
00:03:55,551 --> 00:03:56,620
Killer shrews...
20
00:03:56,620 --> 00:03:58,137
...murderous Muppets!
21
00:03:58,862 --> 00:03:59,344
Yes!
22
00:04:00,620 --> 00:04:02,758
There's no business
like shrew business!
23
00:04:03,931 --> 00:04:06,310
It's now time to
sit back, relax...
24
00:04:08,793 --> 00:04:12,000
...munch on some delicious
popcorn with that
artery-hardening butter
stuff they put on it...
25
00:04:13,931 --> 00:04:18,620
...and get ready to watch
the amazing reimagining
of Ken Cosentino's
26
00:04:19,620 --> 00:04:22,310
Attack of the Killer Shrews!
27
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,413
[creepy music starts]
28
00:04:29,793 --> 00:04:30,275
[slap]
29
00:04:31,689 --> 00:04:32,172
[slap]
30
00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:33,724
[slap]
31
00:04:35,068 --> 00:04:38,137
Svenson! We're going to be
rich beyond our wildest dreams!
32
00:04:38,896 --> 00:04:39,862
That's great, sir!
33
00:04:48,068 --> 00:04:53,000
See, Svenson? It's working!
My children are growing!
34
00:04:54,517 --> 00:04:56,103
My serum is working!
35
00:04:57,034 --> 00:04:57,896
You did it sir!
36
00:04:58,758 --> 00:05:00,103
No, Svenson.... we did it!
37
00:05:00,793 --> 00:05:01,827
[purring]
38
00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:05,758
Look Svenson!!! Look
how big it's getting!!
39
00:05:06,344 --> 00:05:06,793
Uh, sir?!
40
00:05:07,655 --> 00:05:09,551
I think I will call it Nibbles!
41
00:05:09,551 --> 00:05:10,344
[shrew screeching]
42
00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:10,965
[Svenson screaming]
43
00:05:11,827 --> 00:05:13,103
Nibbles! Stop it! Nibbles!
44
00:05:13,965 --> 00:05:15,137
Stop eating him!
45
00:05:15,137 --> 00:05:16,000
Nibbles!
46
00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:17,586
[roaring, gurgling]
47
00:05:20,724 --> 00:05:22,034
[laughter] Oh, Charles..
48
00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:25,482
Thank you again for inviting us.
49
00:05:26,413 --> 00:05:27,862
It's a pleasure, darling!
50
00:05:29,068 --> 00:05:30,517
You too, Lewis.
Thank you, Charles.
51
00:05:31,103 --> 00:05:31,310
[cork popping]
52
00:05:32,034 --> 00:05:33,206
[champagne pouring]
53
00:05:36,034 --> 00:05:38,137
Maybe once we're finished
with our drinks, the
professor can you show his
54
00:05:38,137 --> 00:05:40,413
shrunken head collection
from South Africa!
55
00:05:41,551 --> 00:05:42,965
Oh how exciting!
I'd love to see it!
56
00:05:44,758 --> 00:05:46,655
Here's to a
successful first run!
57
00:05:47,517 --> 00:05:47,931
Here here! [glasses clank]
58
00:05:48,517 --> 00:05:48,793
Congratulations!
59
00:05:54,172 --> 00:05:56,551
[whispering] I couldn't have
done it without you, Lewis...
60
00:05:58,482 --> 00:06:02,103
Charles.. you know I'm
more than just your agent,
I'm your biggest fan!
61
00:06:03,448 --> 00:06:05,000
Would you give us a
preview reading, professor?
62
00:06:05,482 --> 00:06:06,000
Please?
63
00:06:06,724 --> 00:06:08,034
Ha! If you insist!
64
00:06:08,793 --> 00:06:09,034
We'd be delighted!
65
00:06:09,931 --> 00:06:11,103
Please...
66
00:06:11,103 --> 00:06:13,862
Make yourselves
comfortable, actually...
67
00:06:14,965 --> 00:06:17,931
This'll be brief!
....from the prologue...
68
00:06:18,379 --> 00:06:18,827
Oh!
69
00:06:22,413 --> 00:06:27,310
Nary a quest has been
ventured, in the scrolls
of the history of man..
70
00:06:27,310 --> 00:06:32,310
..where one educated physicist
has determined an exact
equation for the heart and
71
00:06:34,689 --> 00:06:37,689
soul of mankind.
72
00:06:39,137 --> 00:06:43,310
Darwin! Maxwell! Einstein!
73
00:06:44,689 --> 00:06:49,379
They will quiver and cringe
in the shadow of I...
74
00:06:51,344 --> 00:06:53,862
..Professor Charles Perry.
75
00:06:56,413 --> 00:06:57,448
Brilliant, Charles!
76
00:06:58,034 --> 00:06:58,793
Marvelous!
77
00:06:59,517 --> 00:07:00,103
Thank you! Thank you!
78
00:07:01,551 --> 00:07:04,620
Well, I'll have to reread
this when Fiona arrives!
79
00:07:05,724 --> 00:07:08,206
Fiona Rae?! The movie starlet??
80
00:07:08,965 --> 00:07:10,103
The one and only!
81
00:07:11,241 --> 00:07:13,034
She's coming here?
Now?! How's my hair??
82
00:07:13,655 --> 00:07:14,103
You look great..
83
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:16,724
She should be here already...
84
00:07:23,137 --> 00:07:26,482
I wonder what's
taking her so long...?
85
00:07:30,206 --> 00:07:31,620
What the fuck is that?!
86
00:07:32,206 --> 00:07:34,965
[steam hissing]
87
00:07:34,965 --> 00:07:36,413
[engine thumping]
88
00:07:59,413 --> 00:07:59,931
[door slam]
89
00:08:04,965 --> 00:08:06,310
Having trouble ma'am? [thud]
90
00:08:06,793 --> 00:08:07,000
Ow!
91
00:08:07,620 --> 00:08:08,827
Woah! Hold on!
92
00:08:09,689 --> 00:08:10,862
You alright?
93
00:08:12,241 --> 00:08:13,241
I'm fine..
94
00:08:14,241 --> 00:08:17,482
Ya sure you're OK? I know CPR...
95
00:08:18,827 --> 00:08:20,379
What's CPR?
96
00:08:22,137 --> 00:08:25,758
It's this new breathin'
thing... say! Don't I recognize
you's from somewheres?
97
00:08:27,689 --> 00:08:28,758
I get that a lot..
98
00:08:29,655 --> 00:08:30,931
Where were you headin' miss?
99
00:08:32,620 --> 00:08:36,000
I was just going up the
road... Mulberry Street?
100
00:08:37,413 --> 00:08:39,034
I was supposed to meet some
friends for a small gathering...
101
00:08:39,034 --> 00:08:43,758
and then the engine
started knocking and all
this smoke poured out.
102
00:08:45,310 --> 00:08:48,344
Well, I can give you a
ride there if you'd like?
103
00:08:49,068 --> 00:08:50,517
It's on my route anyway.
104
00:08:52,068 --> 00:08:54,241
Are you sure you don't mind?
105
00:08:54,862 --> 00:08:55,517
No absolutely!
106
00:08:56,689 --> 00:08:56,965
I wouldn't want
to be a bother...
107
00:08:57,862 --> 00:08:58,724
Nonsense!
108
00:09:00,689 --> 00:09:04,586
You'd be surprised how
lonely it can get in the car!
Especially without Wayne...
109
00:09:05,896 --> 00:09:07,586
Come on! Hop in!
I'll give ya a ride!
110
00:09:09,137 --> 00:09:10,206
I'll get my bag!
111
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:18,000
Does your friend have a phone?
112
00:09:18,551 --> 00:09:19,310
Yes.
113
00:09:20,724 --> 00:09:23,241
Alright! We'll just call a
tow truck once we get inside.
114
00:09:23,862 --> 00:09:25,172
You're too kind!
115
00:09:31,448 --> 00:09:33,758
Your friend sure does
like his privacy!
116
00:09:34,379 --> 00:09:35,310
Don't we all...
117
00:09:36,655 --> 00:09:37,448
[knocking]
118
00:09:45,413 --> 00:09:49,103
Feeeee-ooooh-nuh!!!
119
00:09:49,724 --> 00:09:50,586
Charles!!
120
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:52,758
[muttering] I see you
brought a guest with you..
121
00:09:54,103 --> 00:09:56,655
I'm Charles Perry, welcome
to my humble abode!
122
00:09:56,655 --> 00:09:57,241
Martin Blake!
123
00:09:59,241 --> 00:10:02,310
Come on in, darling, we're
having the most choice
discussion about my book!
124
00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:04,172
You too Officer Drake!
125
00:10:04,172 --> 00:10:04,689
Blake, sir!
126
00:10:05,275 --> 00:10:05,620
Please come in..
127
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,206
Come and have a drink with us!
128
00:10:09,379 --> 00:10:10,206
I'd love to but
I'm on the clock.
129
00:10:12,034 --> 00:10:14,551
Mineral water for
officer...[stammering]
130
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:15,413
Blake...
131
00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:17,517
[dryly] Blake...
132
00:10:17,517 --> 00:10:20,310
Charles, I was so afraid
I wasn't going to make it!
133
00:10:21,482 --> 00:10:24,413
Fiona! My dear! So
good to see you!
134
00:10:24,413 --> 00:10:29,413
Lewis! Oh... there it is...
the smell that won't go away...
135
00:10:31,068 --> 00:10:34,827
Allow me to introduce
you to my better half,
the lovely Cassandra!
136
00:10:35,586 --> 00:10:36,310
Cassandra? So beautiful!
137
00:10:37,206 --> 00:10:39,793
I am such a huge fan Miss Rae!
138
00:10:39,793 --> 00:10:40,724
May I call you Fiona?
139
00:10:40,724 --> 00:10:42,034
[whispering] Fiona Rae!
140
00:10:42,931 --> 00:10:43,724
Yes please!
141
00:10:45,689 --> 00:10:48,620
I am such a huge fan!
I've seen all of your
films! Some of them twice!
142
00:10:49,241 --> 00:10:50,068
Haha why?
143
00:10:50,068 --> 00:10:50,689
You're Fiona Rae!
144
00:10:53,827 --> 00:10:54,862
I am, yes!
145
00:10:56,827 --> 00:11:00,793
Wow! To think I had a movie
star in my car! Wait til
Wayne hears about this!
146
00:11:02,827 --> 00:11:07,689
Charles, I hate to trouble you,
but may I please use your phone?
I have to call a tow truck.
147
00:11:08,413 --> 00:11:09,344
Of course, my dear!
148
00:11:11,275 --> 00:11:14,965
Cassandra! Be a dear, would
you please? And help Fiona
with her....personals?
149
00:11:17,344 --> 00:11:18,137
Certainly!
150
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:20,448
Use the phone in the study!
151
00:11:21,034 --> 00:11:21,793
Thank you.
152
00:11:23,758 --> 00:11:26,310
You two will have
much to talk about...
153
00:11:30,724 --> 00:11:32,241
Quite a place you've
got here, Professor!
154
00:11:33,379 --> 00:11:35,482
It's a roof over my
head, y'know...really...
155
00:11:37,448 --> 00:11:40,724
I do beg your pardon!
This man is Lewis Fontana,
my agent! Sheriff Blake!
156
00:11:44,551 --> 00:11:47,517
Please to meet you
Sheriff...[slimy
squishes]...thanks
for keeping us safe.
157
00:11:49,413 --> 00:11:52,931
Just doing my duty. Why does
a professor need an agent?
158
00:11:54,862 --> 00:11:59,655
I've simply published my latest
book! It's a Symposium of
History's Greatest Scholars!
159
00:12:04,275 --> 00:12:05,241
Non-fiction.
160
00:12:07,344 --> 00:12:08,620
We were just celebrating.
161
00:12:09,482 --> 00:12:11,103
Well, don't celebrate too hard.
162
00:12:12,586 --> 00:12:15,000
Congratulations, Professor,
but I really must be going.
163
00:12:16,379 --> 00:12:18,965
So soon! But you've
practically just got here!
164
00:12:19,551 --> 00:12:20,241
I'm on patrol.
165
00:12:21,758 --> 00:12:24,724
And what could possibly
happen way out here?
166
00:12:27,655 --> 00:12:28,965
[sticks breaking]
167
00:12:30,482 --> 00:12:33,275
Where are you, you
Shrewish bastards?!?
168
00:12:34,034 --> 00:12:36,206
Ahhh! There you are!!
169
00:12:39,655 --> 00:12:40,931
You really can't stay?
170
00:12:41,517 --> 00:12:41,965
Positive.
171
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:49,034
You're all in grave danger!!!
172
00:12:49,689 --> 00:12:50,413
Friend of yours?
173
00:12:51,241 --> 00:12:53,344
[parlor music plays]
174
00:12:54,793 --> 00:12:57,862
Doctor... you must
be putting us on?
175
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:00,655
I am dead serious!
176
00:13:02,620 --> 00:13:06,137
There are gigantic killer
shrews roaming these
woods! We must all leave!
177
00:13:09,103 --> 00:13:10,965
There is no more
time for discussion!
178
00:13:10,965 --> 00:13:13,827
Calm down! We know
shrews aren't that big..
179
00:13:14,551 --> 00:13:15,896
These ones are!!!
180
00:13:17,275 --> 00:13:19,862
Professor... this is some
sort of prank, right?
181
00:13:21,620 --> 00:13:22,758
You must listen!
182
00:13:24,103 --> 00:13:27,000
I was experimenting...with
a cure for rabies...
183
00:13:28,172 --> 00:13:30,000
...when something
went very wrong!
184
00:13:30,896 --> 00:13:33,827
These shrews...are RAVENOUS!
185
00:13:34,448 --> 00:13:35,482
What's a shrew?
186
00:13:36,413 --> 00:13:37,551
It's like a mole.
187
00:13:38,103 --> 00:13:38,620
Cute!
188
00:13:41,068 --> 00:13:45,551
Cute?! These shrews
are not cute!! Have you
not been listening to
anything that I've said?!
189
00:13:50,206 --> 00:13:54,413
They are.... vicious
killers! These are...
190
00:13:55,034 --> 00:13:56,275
KILLER SHREWS!!
191
00:13:56,275 --> 00:13:57,862
[dun dun DUN!]
192
00:13:57,862 --> 00:14:00,655
Fiona dear! Sounds like the
plot for your next picture!
193
00:14:02,241 --> 00:14:04,655
I don't think that's
very funny.... he's
obviously disturbed...
194
00:14:05,517 --> 00:14:07,344
Come on, doc! Let's getcha home!
195
00:14:09,241 --> 00:14:13,344
You're all going to
die!! Don't you see?!
You're all going to die!!
196
00:14:14,068 --> 00:14:15,862
Don't make me cuff you!
197
00:14:16,827 --> 00:14:18,724
What a ghastly man!
198
00:14:19,758 --> 00:14:20,482
After you!
199
00:14:22,448 --> 00:14:23,103
[scary music plays]
200
00:14:23,103 --> 00:14:26,103
[screams!]
[roaring, shrew noises]
201
00:14:26,862 --> 00:14:28,000
[growling]
202
00:14:28,517 --> 00:14:29,000
Help!
203
00:14:29,758 --> 00:14:30,551
Heeelp!
204
00:14:31,137 --> 00:14:31,482
[shrew noises]
205
00:14:32,068 --> 00:14:32,310
Help me!!!
206
00:14:33,586 --> 00:14:34,448
Heeelp!
207
00:14:35,206 --> 00:14:36,103
Heeeelp meeee!
208
00:14:36,724 --> 00:14:37,000
[roaring]
209
00:14:37,620 --> 00:14:38,137
Help me!
210
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:40,310
[roaring] Please help me!!
211
00:14:40,931 --> 00:14:41,413
[shotgun blast]
212
00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:43,758
[growling]
213
00:14:45,034 --> 00:14:45,620
[BLAM!]
214
00:14:46,896 --> 00:14:48,310
[danger music fades]
215
00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:56,655
[whispering] What the
fuck IS that thing??
216
00:14:57,241 --> 00:14:58,068
What is it?!
I don't know..
217
00:14:59,517 --> 00:15:02,620
What the HELL do you think
it is?? It's a killer shrew!
218
00:15:03,482 --> 00:15:04,310
He was telling the truth!
219
00:15:05,206 --> 00:15:05,965
Is it a dog?
220
00:15:07,137 --> 00:15:11,965
No it's not a damn
dog! It's a SHREW!
221
00:15:12,655 --> 00:15:13,206
[cocks shotgun]
222
00:15:14,655 --> 00:15:16,310
We have to get out of here!
Sweetheart, we need to leave!
223
00:15:17,172 --> 00:15:19,827
No one is going anywhere!
224
00:15:20,551 --> 00:15:22,034
And on who's authority?
225
00:15:23,172 --> 00:15:24,758
He's right, it's
not safe out there..
226
00:15:25,620 --> 00:15:26,758
I need to radio for back up!
227
00:15:27,620 --> 00:15:28,379
Doctor!
228
00:15:29,517 --> 00:15:31,586
How many of those
things are out there?
229
00:15:32,448 --> 00:15:36,620
Thirty! Well... twenty-nine now!
230
00:15:37,344 --> 00:15:37,896
This is Sheriff Blake!
231
00:15:39,758 --> 00:15:41,620
I'm in a house on
Mulberry Street and we're
in need of assistance!
232
00:15:42,344 --> 00:15:43,448
[radio] You OK Sheriff?
233
00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:46,103
Can someone please help me?!
234
00:15:48,620 --> 00:15:51,517
We have one wounded a
big problem on our hands!
Send a squad car and an
ambulance immediately!
235
00:15:52,655 --> 00:15:54,206
There's a first
aid kit in the W.C.
236
00:15:54,827 --> 00:15:55,172
I-I'll get it!
237
00:15:55,931 --> 00:15:56,896
I'm coming with you!
238
00:15:58,034 --> 00:15:58,931
Watch your step...
these are new shoes!
239
00:15:59,379 --> 00:16:01,517
Ew..
240
00:16:01,517 --> 00:16:04,551
[radio] The ambulance is in
Springville assisting in a house
fire! I'll head over to you now!
241
00:16:05,413 --> 00:16:06,000
[radio] What's the address?
242
00:16:06,758 --> 00:16:07,241
What's your address?
243
00:16:08,172 --> 00:16:10,620
Three-eight-zero
Mulberry Street.
244
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:14,758
Three-eighty Mulberry Street.
Did you say Springville?
245
00:16:16,172 --> 00:16:18,275
That's two hours away! Don't
they have their own ambulance?
246
00:16:19,655 --> 00:16:22,000
[radio] No! Blake! What's
going on out there?
247
00:16:22,758 --> 00:16:23,931
I'm not sure, I think...
248
00:16:25,448 --> 00:16:27,413
I think it might
be KILLER SHREWS!!
249
00:16:27,413 --> 00:16:29,517
[dun dun DUNNN!]
250
00:16:29,517 --> 00:16:31,965
[radio] Haha OK! Wayne out!
251
00:16:33,448 --> 00:16:36,137
How many officers do
you have, Sheriff?
252
00:16:37,586 --> 00:16:39,586
Well it's just me and Wayne
on the clock right now...
253
00:16:40,448 --> 00:16:43,241
He IS my deputy, AND my cousin!
254
00:16:44,689 --> 00:16:47,896
Two officers! You're going
to need more than that!
255
00:16:49,275 --> 00:16:53,103
You're telling me- EW! Your
wounds are all....goopy!
256
00:16:54,620 --> 00:16:55,827
Which one?
257
00:16:56,551 --> 00:16:57,551
The one on your neck!
258
00:16:58,379 --> 00:17:00,103
It's really gross!
259
00:17:02,206 --> 00:17:04,517
Lewis is on his way
with the first-aid kit!
260
00:17:05,482 --> 00:17:07,448
Oh.. THAT'S good!
261
00:17:08,310 --> 00:17:09,862
[disgusting weasel farts]
262
00:17:10,448 --> 00:17:11,724
[poop noises]
263
00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:13,448
This is terrible..
264
00:17:14,551 --> 00:17:15,620
I know! Those
things are so scary!
265
00:17:16,793 --> 00:17:21,620
No, this book. This
book is terrible.
266
00:17:23,724 --> 00:17:25,241
Then why do you represent him?
267
00:17:27,793 --> 00:17:30,655
Because he's rich... in
fact, this whole shrew thing
just might make it easier
for us to find his safe..
268
00:17:31,965 --> 00:17:33,275
I think we should just
forget the whole thing.
269
00:17:33,896 --> 00:17:34,931
Nonsense!
270
00:17:36,517 --> 00:17:40,620
All we have to do.... is
sneak away... open the
safe, grab it and go!
271
00:17:41,586 --> 00:17:42,896
[horrific farting]
272
00:17:44,275 --> 00:17:45,758
You should light a candle or
something... that smells awful!
273
00:17:48,344 --> 00:17:49,931
It was the casserole...
274
00:17:51,344 --> 00:17:52,827
I love the one where you use the
snake to swing from the cliff!
275
00:17:53,689 --> 00:17:54,965
That was Return to Ape Island!
276
00:17:55,689 --> 00:17:56,172
Wow!
277
00:17:56,793 --> 00:17:57,448
Fiona Rae!
278
00:17:58,620 --> 00:18:01,620
I knew I recognized you
from somewhere! Say..
279
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:04,103
..can I have your autograph
when this is all said and done?
280
00:18:04,724 --> 00:18:05,758
Sure! Why not?
281
00:18:07,310 --> 00:18:08,862
Here you go Professor.
282
00:18:13,275 --> 00:18:17,310
So doc, why were you really
messing with those shrews?
283
00:18:18,862 --> 00:18:20,379
[weakly] I told you...
284
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:26,379
I was trying to create
a cure for rabies...
285
00:18:27,241 --> 00:18:28,965
But HOW did they turn into THAT?
286
00:18:30,241 --> 00:18:33,586
Something went
wrong....OBVIOUSLY!
287
00:18:34,827 --> 00:18:36,931
I...I have to make an
emergency phone call.
288
00:18:37,793 --> 00:18:39,517
Use the phone in the study.
289
00:18:41,448 --> 00:18:44,413
Those things are probably
miles away by now.
290
00:18:46,344 --> 00:18:50,241
Doubtful! Those are
predatory animals! They
will go where the prey is!
291
00:18:51,965 --> 00:18:54,241
What? You mean US?!
292
00:18:56,103 --> 00:18:59,551
Yes! They've tasted
blood... when they killed
my lab assistant...
293
00:19:00,482 --> 00:19:03,310
I have to go, I can't stay here!
294
00:19:03,310 --> 00:19:06,517
You can't go! It's too
dangerous out there!
295
00:19:08,517 --> 00:19:11,413
But you don't understand! I have
to be on set tomorrow morning,
I have a very early call time!
296
00:19:11,413 --> 00:19:14,517
OK. Once the tow truck
arrives, I'll escort you.
297
00:19:14,517 --> 00:19:17,206
They're not coming. No
one answered the phone!
298
00:19:18,068 --> 00:19:20,206
Well where do you have to go?
299
00:19:20,206 --> 00:19:24,034
Franklinville? I was only
supposed to be in town for
one day! I have to leave!
300
00:19:25,551 --> 00:19:28,241
Well, once Wayne gets
here I'll take you.
301
00:19:28,241 --> 00:19:30,000
No I would prefer to leave now!
302
00:19:31,206 --> 00:19:33,551
We're not going anywhere
'til my backup arrives.
303
00:19:36,379 --> 00:19:38,206
How are you gonna get in
without the combination?
304
00:19:38,965 --> 00:19:39,620
I'll think of something.
305
00:19:40,344 --> 00:19:40,482
[creepy sliding noise]
306
00:19:42,379 --> 00:19:43,586
Did you hear something?
307
00:19:44,793 --> 00:19:46,448
Do you think they
got in the house?
308
00:19:47,586 --> 00:19:48,724
Come on! Let's go
back with the others!
309
00:19:50,172 --> 00:19:51,310
You go on ahead. I'm not leaving
'til I've gotten into the safe.
310
00:19:51,793 --> 00:19:52,137
Lewis!
311
00:19:52,620 --> 00:19:53,034
Go on!
312
00:19:55,551 --> 00:19:57,310
[parlor music continues]
313
00:19:58,965 --> 00:20:02,586
This man is going into
shock! We've got to
get him to a hospital!
314
00:20:02,586 --> 00:20:03,137
[gurgling]
315
00:20:03,896 --> 00:20:04,137
What's wrong with him?
316
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:08,000
[stammering]
317
00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:09,689
BLEEDING!
318
00:20:15,241 --> 00:20:16,862
[ominous music begins]
319
00:20:20,310 --> 00:20:22,137
That's Wayne! We're saved!
320
00:20:23,724 --> 00:20:25,137
Wayne! Come in Wayne!
321
00:20:27,241 --> 00:20:28,448
I'm here Sheriff!
322
00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:30,931
Wayne you listen to me and
you listen to me carefully!
323
00:20:32,379 --> 00:20:33,620
We have a man down who is in
need of medical assistance!
324
00:20:35,068 --> 00:20:37,517
Be careful getting out of your
vehicle! There are monstrous
325
00:20:38,620 --> 00:20:39,931
KILLER SHREWS!
326
00:20:40,689 --> 00:20:41,689
All over the grounds!
327
00:20:42,586 --> 00:20:44,172
Yea, ok Sheriff. Killer shrews!
328
00:20:48,551 --> 00:20:52,896
[monstrous growling]
329
00:20:56,758 --> 00:20:57,793
[shrew noises]
330
00:20:58,482 --> 00:20:59,448
[zap zap zap!]
331
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:03,517
[BLAM!]
332
00:21:04,103 --> 00:21:07,137
[gunshots]
333
00:21:08,517 --> 00:21:09,724
That's my cousin!
334
00:21:10,310 --> 00:21:11,034
Did it getcha?!
335
00:21:12,206 --> 00:21:13,000
It took a chunk
off my damn ear!!!
336
00:21:14,103 --> 00:21:15,448
We gotta get everybody
to the hospital!
337
00:21:16,620 --> 00:21:18,724
...but we can only
take one of you!
338
00:21:20,344 --> 00:21:20,862
You go!
339
00:21:22,620 --> 00:21:23,931
Thank you Charles.
340
00:21:25,344 --> 00:21:26,241
Perry you cover us while
we get the doc to the car!
341
00:21:26,241 --> 00:21:27,206
Aye!
342
00:21:33,620 --> 00:21:34,931
[bloody gurgling]
343
00:21:36,137 --> 00:21:39,758
[ominous music intensifies]
344
00:21:50,862 --> 00:21:52,137
Good luck, my dear!
345
00:21:52,931 --> 00:21:54,206
Be safe, Professor!
346
00:21:56,310 --> 00:21:58,310
Let's get the Hell outta here!
347
00:21:59,482 --> 00:22:00,931
Wait for help to arrive!
We'll be back soon!
348
00:22:01,827 --> 00:22:02,862
[shrew noises]
349
00:22:06,655 --> 00:22:07,793
[shotgun blast]
350
00:22:10,448 --> 00:22:12,206
[growling, shrew noises]
351
00:22:16,103 --> 00:22:17,206
[shotgun blast]
352
00:22:17,827 --> 00:22:20,655
[whimpering]
353
00:22:23,275 --> 00:22:24,241
Where's Lewis?
354
00:22:25,310 --> 00:22:27,448
He's in the study...did
they leave us?!
355
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:32,344
They're sending help. We
just need to... sit tight...
356
00:22:33,517 --> 00:22:35,931
I can't take this!
Hold me professor!!
357
00:22:36,517 --> 00:22:38,172
[whimpering]
358
00:22:42,689 --> 00:22:43,724
[shrew noises]
359
00:22:44,896 --> 00:22:45,379
Hello?
360
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:47,103
Is anyone there?
361
00:22:53,103 --> 00:22:54,137
[shrew noises]
362
00:22:56,034 --> 00:22:57,655
Cassandra? Is that you?
363
00:23:02,586 --> 00:23:03,620
[shrew noises]
364
00:23:05,586 --> 00:23:08,137
Oh I hope it's not
one of those shrews!
365
00:23:10,448 --> 00:23:11,827
[foreboding music]
366
00:23:13,137 --> 00:23:13,724
Got it..
367
00:23:14,310 --> 00:23:15,000
[intense crash!]
368
00:23:15,586 --> 00:23:20,000
AHHHHHHHHH!
369
00:23:21,137 --> 00:23:21,655
[shrew noises]
370
00:23:22,862 --> 00:23:26,586
Ahhh! There's a killer
shrew in the house!!!
371
00:23:27,034 --> 00:23:27,413
[thud]
372
00:23:28,137 --> 00:23:29,241
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!
373
00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:33,310
AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
374
00:23:35,965 --> 00:23:37,344
[screaming]
375
00:23:38,068 --> 00:23:39,000
EAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!!!
376
00:23:39,793 --> 00:23:42,517
[screaming]
377
00:23:43,241 --> 00:23:44,103
[growling, shrew noises]
378
00:23:44,103 --> 00:23:45,793
AHHHHHH!!!!!!
379
00:23:46,379 --> 00:23:47,103
[growling]
380
00:23:48,241 --> 00:23:49,862
AHHHHHHH!!
381
00:23:50,586 --> 00:23:52,000
[roaring, shrew noises]
382
00:23:53,206 --> 00:23:55,827
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
383
00:23:56,448 --> 00:23:57,103
[growling]
384
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:00,103
[screaming, shrew noises]
385
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:03,034
Confound it Lewis! Keep still!
386
00:24:03,655 --> 00:24:04,103
[screaming]
387
00:24:05,344 --> 00:24:05,965
[shotgun blast, glass breaks]
388
00:24:07,137 --> 00:24:07,862
[screaming, roaring]
389
00:24:08,448 --> 00:24:08,586
[shotgun cocks]
390
00:24:11,965 --> 00:24:12,517
[click]
391
00:24:13,103 --> 00:24:13,965
AHHHHHH!!!!
392
00:24:14,689 --> 00:24:16,206
Keep 'em occupied Lewis!
393
00:24:17,413 --> 00:24:18,275
[screaming]
394
00:24:19,034 --> 00:24:20,241
AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
395
00:24:21,206 --> 00:24:22,862
[animal grunts]
396
00:24:24,034 --> 00:24:28,551
AHHHH! It's humping
meeee!! AHHHHH!!!!!
397
00:24:32,448 --> 00:24:34,000
[goofy musical score]
398
00:24:35,551 --> 00:24:37,068
[score ends abruptly]
399
00:24:42,931 --> 00:24:43,724
[rustling]
400
00:24:52,448 --> 00:24:55,517
[whispering] What
the fuck IS that...?
401
00:24:57,931 --> 00:25:02,931
[screaming, shrew noises]
402
00:25:16,275 --> 00:25:17,241
[lock clicks]
403
00:25:25,862 --> 00:25:28,896
[low rumbling score]
404
00:25:30,344 --> 00:25:31,000
[huge crash]
405
00:25:31,620 --> 00:25:32,827
Eeeeee!!!
406
00:25:33,517 --> 00:25:34,137
[grunts]
407
00:25:35,620 --> 00:25:36,655
[score builds]
408
00:25:37,862 --> 00:25:38,344
God!!
409
00:25:39,862 --> 00:25:40,344
Ugh!
410
00:25:42,379 --> 00:25:43,827
[score intensifies]
411
00:25:49,689 --> 00:25:54,034
Ahh! Good shrew! You
don't want to eat me!
412
00:25:55,413 --> 00:25:59,413
I'm just a literary
agent! I'm all pudgy ahhh!
413
00:26:00,896 --> 00:26:01,931
[shrew noises]
414
00:26:05,137 --> 00:26:06,758
[shotgun blast, splat]
415
00:26:07,827 --> 00:26:09,000
[score finishes]
416
00:26:10,724 --> 00:26:12,310
[Lewis gasping for air]
417
00:26:15,448 --> 00:26:17,310
Lewis, put some trousers on!
418
00:26:18,206 --> 00:26:22,310
EEEEEEEEEYAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!
419
00:26:22,931 --> 00:26:23,379
[roaring]
420
00:26:25,862 --> 00:26:27,517
[shotgun blast, squeak]
421
00:26:31,655 --> 00:26:32,206
My dear!
422
00:26:45,965 --> 00:26:48,344
We gotta go. We
gotta get outta here!
423
00:26:51,655 --> 00:26:54,344
I wonder how they got in...
424
00:26:55,862 --> 00:26:56,655
The window!
425
00:26:57,965 --> 00:26:59,137
[fun music plays]
426
00:27:02,241 --> 00:27:05,275
What the fuck IS THAT
THING?! [cocks shotgun]
427
00:27:06,034 --> 00:27:06,862
[fun music]
428
00:27:11,034 --> 00:27:11,758
[KABLAM!]
429
00:27:23,206 --> 00:27:23,862
Let's go!
430
00:27:28,413 --> 00:27:31,137
[fun music transitions
to spooky score]
431
00:27:33,551 --> 00:27:37,448
We're not safe here!
Murdock said that they'd
be hunting us and that's
exactly what they are doing!
432
00:27:39,310 --> 00:27:39,827
[shrew noises]
433
00:27:40,448 --> 00:27:41,103
[shotgun blast]
434
00:27:44,517 --> 00:27:45,655
[shotgun blast]
435
00:27:46,827 --> 00:27:47,379
Come on!
436
00:28:00,103 --> 00:28:00,965
[door slams]
437
00:28:02,034 --> 00:28:03,137
[engine starts]
438
00:28:08,517 --> 00:28:11,655
[tires squealing]
439
00:28:14,758 --> 00:28:16,206
[siren]
440
00:28:26,413 --> 00:28:26,931
Ew..
441
00:28:29,172 --> 00:28:32,206
We're almost there!
You're gonna make it doc!
442
00:28:33,862 --> 00:28:36,620
We need to go back and
get my ear! Maybe they
can sew it back on!
443
00:28:37,827 --> 00:28:39,931
We're gonna get you a
new ear! A better ear!
444
00:28:40,793 --> 00:28:42,758
Yea well I want my ear damn it!
445
00:28:44,034 --> 00:28:45,586
Well you-LOOKOUT!!!!
446
00:28:48,310 --> 00:28:49,172
[screaming]
447
00:28:49,172 --> 00:28:50,620
[tires screech]
[thud SPLAT]
448
00:28:52,034 --> 00:28:52,965
[screaming]
449
00:28:53,689 --> 00:28:54,034
[tires screeching]
450
00:28:54,655 --> 00:28:55,000
[loud CRASH]
451
00:28:55,586 --> 00:28:57,517
[metal crashing]
452
00:28:58,103 --> 00:28:59,206
[steam hissing]
453
00:29:08,137 --> 00:29:08,965
[body thud]
454
00:29:10,827 --> 00:29:11,620
Sheriff...
455
00:29:12,206 --> 00:29:13,275
Are you alright?
456
00:29:14,931 --> 00:29:18,655
I think so... I've
done stunts before..
457
00:29:18,655 --> 00:29:20,344
Oooh...Wayne!
458
00:29:20,931 --> 00:29:21,482
Wayne!!
459
00:29:22,068 --> 00:29:23,793
Aw shit! Wayne!
460
00:29:24,482 --> 00:29:26,137
Awww shit nooo!
461
00:29:26,620 --> 00:29:27,413
Do CPR!
462
00:29:27,413 --> 00:29:29,103
I don't know CPR!!
463
00:29:29,862 --> 00:29:32,310
Aww shit! Wayne! Aww..
464
00:29:32,310 --> 00:29:33,551
The doctor's body is gone!
465
00:29:34,724 --> 00:29:35,862
It musta got thrown
during the crash!
466
00:29:37,827 --> 00:29:41,206
Aw shit! Wayne's dead! I'm gonna
lose my badge! Killer shrews
all over the place! Aww shit!
467
00:29:43,724 --> 00:29:48,344
Alright alright! Calm
down. You are gonna get it
together and you're going
to take me to Franklinville!
468
00:29:50,551 --> 00:29:54,206
Alright, we need to radio
the town... where's my radio?
469
00:29:55,758 --> 00:29:57,241
My radio's gone?!?
470
00:29:58,103 --> 00:30:00,034
Goddamnit! Jesus! Look oh man!
471
00:30:00,034 --> 00:30:02,137
I paid fifteen dollars
for that thing!
472
00:30:02,137 --> 00:30:05,379
Look at this shit!! It's
gonna come outta my pay!!
473
00:30:06,241 --> 00:30:08,310
Oh my God what the Hell is goin-
474
00:30:09,517 --> 00:30:10,827
...I bumped my head
off the dashboard...
475
00:30:11,344 --> 00:30:11,862
Wayne!?
476
00:30:13,068 --> 00:30:14,689
I think I saw his eyes blink!
477
00:30:15,275 --> 00:30:16,137
No, he's dead.
478
00:30:17,655 --> 00:30:19,655
Well my hat's at least is here!
479
00:30:21,448 --> 00:30:26,448
Aww Wayne come on.... aw we're
just gonna have to walk...
480
00:30:29,827 --> 00:30:30,620
[crickets]
481
00:30:33,586 --> 00:30:34,551
[scary theme]
482
00:30:37,103 --> 00:30:40,310
[evil laughing]
483
00:30:48,103 --> 00:30:48,827
[traffic]
484
00:30:51,724 --> 00:30:52,758
[upbeat tempo]
485
00:31:12,241 --> 00:31:14,413
Hey look what the
cat dragged in!
486
00:31:15,586 --> 00:31:17,379
Wife finally let you
out the house huh?
487
00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:18,827
Can't complain.
488
00:31:19,724 --> 00:31:21,241
Sit your old ass down.
489
00:31:22,689 --> 00:31:25,000
You know when I was a young
man, I woulda kicked your ass!
490
00:31:25,724 --> 00:31:27,482
Yea... right sir!
491
00:31:29,655 --> 00:31:33,068
So we gonna buff the top or
we're gonna give you a cut?
492
00:31:35,137 --> 00:31:36,379
OK just the cut!
493
00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:39,310
You know what [breathing]
494
00:31:39,931 --> 00:31:41,827
[squeaks]
495
00:31:42,586 --> 00:31:43,758
That one's on the house!
496
00:31:44,241 --> 00:31:44,620
Thanks..
497
00:31:46,413 --> 00:31:47,620
So how's the kids?
498
00:31:48,241 --> 00:31:48,379
Kids are good..
499
00:31:50,655 --> 00:31:54,344
I see that you've been
drinking a lot lately?
500
00:31:55,793 --> 00:31:57,551
Well you know, sometimes you
just gotta do what you gotta do.
501
00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:00,620
[diner music, chatter]
502
00:32:02,551 --> 00:32:06,586
[off screen] Hey Ted, I'm
just hanging out... you still
rubbing your belly button?
503
00:32:13,827 --> 00:32:14,310
Ted.
504
00:32:14,793 --> 00:32:15,103
Martin.
505
00:32:19,965 --> 00:32:20,931
[phone beeps]
506
00:32:24,517 --> 00:32:25,000
Hello.
507
00:32:26,103 --> 00:32:29,655
This is Sheriff Blake...
no, the OTHER one.
508
00:32:30,586 --> 00:32:31,965
Yea, I'm out in Franklinville...
509
00:32:33,310 --> 00:32:35,034
There's been a major
accident out on Route 33.
510
00:32:36,379 --> 00:32:39,344
Yea there's two casualties,
one is my deputy...
511
00:32:39,344 --> 00:32:41,103
..who IS my COUSIN..
512
00:32:42,620 --> 00:32:44,620
Yea I'm at the Sunshine Cafe.
513
00:32:45,724 --> 00:32:48,206
Yea alright I'll be here...bye!
514
00:32:48,862 --> 00:32:49,379
[hangs up]
515
00:32:50,896 --> 00:32:53,655
[really stupid restaurant
chatter in the background]
516
00:32:55,103 --> 00:32:57,931
[the sound of people enjoying
breakfast in the afternoon]
517
00:32:59,551 --> 00:33:00,827
Did you tell them
about the shrews?
518
00:33:01,689 --> 00:33:03,103
Do ya think they'd believe me?
519
00:33:04,310 --> 00:33:05,862
Can I start you guys off
with something to drink?
520
00:33:06,448 --> 00:33:06,965
Water, please!
521
00:33:07,551 --> 00:33:08,517
[weakly] Water.
522
00:33:11,965 --> 00:33:13,827
I've missed my call time!
523
00:33:14,551 --> 00:33:16,000
I have to call my agent.
524
00:33:20,068 --> 00:33:20,724
Uh huh...
525
00:33:22,758 --> 00:33:26,206
Yeah baby... naw I'm telling you
when you get out of jail we're
gonna have some real good times!
526
00:33:26,206 --> 00:33:27,482
Excuse me!
527
00:33:28,965 --> 00:33:30,965
Hold on baby, someone's trying
to talk to me... what is it??
528
00:33:32,137 --> 00:33:34,137
Sir, I need to make an
emergency phone call!
529
00:33:34,137 --> 00:33:38,517
Listen, this one's in use. Why
don't you go use the barbershop
across the street alright?
530
00:33:40,551 --> 00:33:41,137
[sarcastically] Thanks...
531
00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:47,379
I have to go across the
street to make a phone call..
532
00:33:47,379 --> 00:33:48,586
OK. What do you want?
533
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:51,241
Eggs and toast.
534
00:33:52,862 --> 00:33:56,379
[yelling] Can I get some
eggs and toast please?
And where's my water?!
535
00:33:57,965 --> 00:33:58,689
[traffic]
536
00:34:03,448 --> 00:34:08,448
You know man? I can see
myself in your head! That
thing really shiny! Hello!!
537
00:34:11,344 --> 00:34:13,137
Fuck you, King Kong!
538
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:16,034
May I please use your phone?!
Ya sure, right there.
539
00:34:16,655 --> 00:34:17,275
Thank you!
540
00:34:19,620 --> 00:34:20,275
[boop boop boop]
541
00:34:20,275 --> 00:34:20,620
[boop boop]
542
00:34:21,206 --> 00:34:21,344
[boop boop]
543
00:34:22,413 --> 00:34:23,448
[truck engine]
544
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:30,379
[engine squealing]
545
00:34:33,103 --> 00:34:34,310
[truck shuts off]
546
00:34:36,724 --> 00:34:37,517
[door slam]
547
00:34:38,310 --> 00:34:39,689
[another door slams]
548
00:34:41,103 --> 00:34:41,586
[another door slams damn they
really like slamming doors huh?]
549
00:34:42,448 --> 00:34:43,862
Looks like there's nobody here!
550
00:34:45,379 --> 00:34:46,000
Helloo!?
551
00:34:48,551 --> 00:34:52,241
Our truck broke down!
We're out of gas!
552
00:34:53,620 --> 00:34:55,724
I don't like this,
I'm going back in.
553
00:34:56,310 --> 00:34:56,862
Cassandra..
554
00:34:57,689 --> 00:34:58,827
[mysterious soundtrack]
555
00:35:00,103 --> 00:35:02,758
Helloooooooooo?!
556
00:35:05,517 --> 00:35:06,827
[another slam come on
seriously? do you want the
shrews to know where you are?]
557
00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:09,000
Find a gas can Lewis
and meet me back here!
558
00:35:09,827 --> 00:35:10,310
OK.
559
00:35:12,724 --> 00:35:13,344
[too late]
560
00:35:17,310 --> 00:35:18,344
[wind blowing]
561
00:35:21,379 --> 00:35:22,344
[spooky tune]
562
00:35:30,344 --> 00:35:31,793
This place is a dump..
563
00:35:36,758 --> 00:35:37,896
[spooky spooky]
564
00:35:46,413 --> 00:35:48,241
Hellooooo?
565
00:35:49,206 --> 00:35:49,931
Who's there?
566
00:35:50,379 --> 00:35:50,793
Ah!
567
00:35:51,689 --> 00:35:52,655
[stammering]
568
00:35:53,517 --> 00:35:55,000
We've run out of fuel..
569
00:35:55,689 --> 00:35:57,758
[stammering]
570
00:35:57,758 --> 00:36:01,379
Have no concern, I'm a man
of considerable academic and
intellectual achievements!
571
00:36:04,000 --> 00:36:07,344
[Scottish accent] Oh yea!
Well you just look like a
man who's run out of gas to
me, and ain't no gas here..
572
00:36:08,275 --> 00:36:08,965
..move on!
573
00:36:11,931 --> 00:36:16,931
[stammering] But it's
an emergency! We've been
attacked by wild animals!
One of us has been injured!
574
00:36:20,068 --> 00:36:22,034
What kind of wild animals?
575
00:36:22,724 --> 00:36:23,655
Shrews..
576
00:36:24,862 --> 00:36:26,206
KILLER SHREWS!
577
00:36:26,206 --> 00:36:27,620
[dun dun DUNNN!]
578
00:36:27,620 --> 00:36:30,000
So you're the ones that brought
them devils around here!
579
00:36:30,724 --> 00:36:31,379
How could that be?
580
00:36:32,793 --> 00:36:36,000
Look out the window son. Ya
gotta be blind not to see them!
581
00:36:39,448 --> 00:36:40,655
Cassandra!
582
00:36:44,310 --> 00:36:46,034
Damn killer shrews!
583
00:36:48,655 --> 00:36:49,344
[snoring]
584
00:37:01,206 --> 00:37:02,000
Errrmmmm..
585
00:37:05,965 --> 00:37:07,137
Oh Jesus!
586
00:37:07,896 --> 00:37:08,137
[dramatic music!]
587
00:37:10,241 --> 00:37:10,758
Arrr!
588
00:37:15,241 --> 00:37:16,275
[shrew noises]
589
00:37:17,137 --> 00:37:18,827
Thank you Simon! Thank you!
590
00:37:21,275 --> 00:37:24,827
I'll await the cab. Tah-tah!
591
00:37:25,862 --> 00:37:26,551
[hangs up]
592
00:37:29,103 --> 00:37:32,862
Darrr!!! Derrrrr!
Deeeerr duhduhduhduhduh!
593
00:37:33,724 --> 00:37:34,965
Daaahhh errrreeeaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!
594
00:37:35,551 --> 00:37:36,689
[shrew noises]
595
00:37:37,413 --> 00:37:38,655
Huminna Hummina!!
596
00:37:38,655 --> 00:37:39,448
[together] What
the fuck is that?!
597
00:37:40,034 --> 00:37:41,000
[snorting]
598
00:37:42,103 --> 00:37:44,103
Derrpppppp derrrrrrr
ayyyyeeeee!!!!
Derrrrrrrrr!!!
599
00:37:44,103 --> 00:37:45,862
[snip! squish!]
Ahhhh!!!! Sonofa!
600
00:37:45,862 --> 00:37:47,000
[loud and wet pooping noises]
601
00:37:47,000 --> 00:37:48,862
Oh the doo-doo butter dookie!!
602
00:37:48,862 --> 00:37:51,517
[shitting noises]
603
00:37:51,517 --> 00:37:54,379
[lots and lots of shit
happening in that guy's pants]
604
00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:55,655
[shrew noises]
605
00:37:56,241 --> 00:37:57,551
[more shit]
606
00:37:58,724 --> 00:37:59,724
That thing doesn't
look friendly!!
607
00:38:00,517 --> 00:38:01,758
Somebody kill that shit!
608
00:38:04,551 --> 00:38:07,620
This is a tasty glass of water!
609
00:38:11,034 --> 00:38:13,655
[doo wop]
610
00:38:18,034 --> 00:38:19,896
[it's OK to get up and dance]
611
00:38:23,517 --> 00:38:27,931
Seymour! You keep dropping
crumbs all over the floor,
we're gonna get rats!
612
00:38:29,793 --> 00:38:32,827
Did you hear what I
said? Pick up your crumbs
or we're gonna get..
613
00:38:33,413 --> 00:38:34,241
[shrew noises]
614
00:38:35,413 --> 00:38:36,034
..rats!
615
00:38:36,827 --> 00:38:38,103
[loud growling]
616
00:38:38,103 --> 00:38:40,310
[screaming]
617
00:38:42,034 --> 00:38:44,275
[screaming, monstrous roaring]
618
00:38:46,206 --> 00:38:47,482
[heavy breathing]
619
00:38:48,517 --> 00:38:53,517
[screaming]
620
00:38:56,034 --> 00:38:57,068
[shrew noises]
621
00:38:57,689 --> 00:38:58,620
[roaring]
622
00:38:59,482 --> 00:39:00,241
[snap!]
623
00:39:00,862 --> 00:39:02,310
[roaring]
624
00:39:02,931 --> 00:39:03,413
[thud squeak!]
625
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:06,137
[thud squeak!]
[thud squeak!]
626
00:39:06,137 --> 00:39:07,689
[thud squeak!] [thud
squeak!] [thud squeak!]
627
00:39:07,689 --> 00:39:07,827
[thud squeak!] [thud squeak!]
[thud squeak!] [thud squeak!]
628
00:39:08,413 --> 00:39:08,551
[roaring]
629
00:39:10,965 --> 00:39:12,413
[thud squeak!] [thud
squeak!] [thud squeak!]
[thud squeak!] [thud squeak!]
[thud squeak!] [thud squeak!]
630
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:14,034
[thud squeak!]
[thud squeak!]
631
00:39:14,931 --> 00:39:15,034
[thud squeak!] [thud squeak!]
632
00:39:18,137 --> 00:39:19,206
[thud squeak!]
633
00:39:24,862 --> 00:39:26,344
Do you have a back door?
634
00:39:27,862 --> 00:39:28,655
Thank you..
635
00:39:35,793 --> 00:39:37,379
That's a bad bitch!
636
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:41,275
What's the matter?
637
00:39:42,103 --> 00:39:42,620
Come on!
638
00:39:44,896 --> 00:39:45,413
[shrew noises]
639
00:39:46,620 --> 00:39:49,034
How do you use this
fucking thing?!
640
00:39:50,551 --> 00:39:55,551
Lewis I think your darling is
about to become shrew chow!
641
00:39:56,827 --> 00:39:59,413
I'll distract them,
you get Cassie!
642
00:39:59,413 --> 00:40:01,137
How do you expect to do that?
643
00:40:02,827 --> 00:40:03,724
GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE!!
644
00:40:04,827 --> 00:40:06,827
Are you out of
your fucking mind?!
645
00:40:07,551 --> 00:40:08,310
AHHHHHH!!! [roaring]
646
00:40:08,931 --> 00:40:09,034
[fun theme song]
647
00:40:09,655 --> 00:40:10,448
[screaming]
648
00:40:10,448 --> 00:40:12,586
[screaming, roaring]
649
00:40:14,448 --> 00:40:19,448
[screaming, roaring]
650
00:40:22,965 --> 00:40:25,206
[roaring]
651
00:40:25,965 --> 00:40:27,000
[shrew noises]
652
00:40:28,413 --> 00:40:29,448
[roaring]
653
00:40:30,620 --> 00:40:34,758
It's humping me
again!!!! Stop it!
654
00:40:38,862 --> 00:40:39,482
[thump!]
655
00:40:42,655 --> 00:40:44,827
I'm here to save you!
656
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:51,413
Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!
657
00:40:52,034 --> 00:40:53,413
[roaring]
Graaaahhh!!
658
00:40:54,896 --> 00:40:55,448
[bang!]
659
00:40:57,413 --> 00:40:58,965
I hate shrews.
660
00:40:59,724 --> 00:41:01,034
[fun theme continues]
661
00:41:02,103 --> 00:41:04,206
Come on! Hop in!
662
00:41:09,241 --> 00:41:10,758
[door slam]
Where's Lewis??
663
00:41:11,620 --> 00:41:13,827
He's creating a distraction!
664
00:41:15,172 --> 00:41:16,379
[engine roars to life]
665
00:41:16,379 --> 00:41:18,620
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
666
00:41:18,620 --> 00:41:19,965
[roaring]
667
00:41:20,931 --> 00:41:22,482
Ahhhh!!!!!
668
00:41:24,586 --> 00:41:26,103
Ahhhhhh!
669
00:41:33,034 --> 00:41:34,310
Ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
670
00:41:37,275 --> 00:41:42,275
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Oh my
God!!!!! AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
671
00:41:45,448 --> 00:41:46,137
[roaring]
672
00:41:47,241 --> 00:41:48,034
[KA-BLAM!]
673
00:41:49,517 --> 00:41:52,310
Damn girl! You got crazy
written all over ya haha!
674
00:41:53,827 --> 00:41:55,724
[whining]
675
00:42:06,620 --> 00:42:08,448
[engine sputtering, dies]
676
00:42:09,931 --> 00:42:11,689
Oh....right right right..
677
00:42:12,724 --> 00:42:13,758
[shrew noises]
678
00:42:16,862 --> 00:42:17,655
[growling]
679
00:42:18,931 --> 00:42:19,482
[BLAM!]
680
00:42:20,241 --> 00:42:21,310
[roaring ferociously]
[BLAM!]
681
00:42:22,241 --> 00:42:22,827
[BLAM!]
682
00:42:23,275 --> 00:42:23,517
[BLAM!]
683
00:42:24,586 --> 00:42:25,448
[KA-BLAM!] Woo-hoo!
684
00:42:26,551 --> 00:42:26,689
Ya ugly shrew
bastards! [gunshots]
685
00:42:27,413 --> 00:42:27,758
[gunshots] Look at that!
686
00:42:28,620 --> 00:42:29,344
Look at that motherfucker!
687
00:42:29,344 --> 00:42:30,000
[gunshots]
688
00:42:33,896 --> 00:42:35,724
Oh! I thought you were dead!
689
00:42:35,724 --> 00:42:37,241
We gotta call the
national guard!
690
00:42:38,379 --> 00:42:40,482
Oh I hope the others
got out alright!
691
00:42:40,482 --> 00:42:42,137
Well they all ran all over
the place, one lady got
hit by an ice cream truck!
692
00:42:42,896 --> 00:42:44,310
I meant the professor!
693
00:42:45,482 --> 00:42:47,793
Yea me too. Let's
get out of here!
694
00:42:55,862 --> 00:42:58,655
Come on, this way will
take us back to town!
695
00:42:59,827 --> 00:43:00,965
Are you sure the road
won't be quicker?
696
00:43:03,241 --> 00:43:05,241
Those things are everywhere!
697
00:43:06,379 --> 00:43:08,034
I'm so frightened!
Hold me Lewis!
698
00:43:09,724 --> 00:43:11,241
We're being followed!
699
00:43:12,206 --> 00:43:12,862
You go
700
00:43:13,655 --> 00:43:14,793
Not without you!
701
00:43:15,965 --> 00:43:17,206
I'm staying, so
that you can go..
702
00:43:18,275 --> 00:43:20,206
..if you go,
then... I can stay..
703
00:43:21,068 --> 00:43:23,137
..but if you stay, I'll stay...
704
00:43:24,724 --> 00:43:28,517
..and if you go, then
I can stay, and I'll
stay so that you can go!
705
00:43:30,241 --> 00:43:31,620
Thank you, Charles!
706
00:43:34,103 --> 00:43:39,103
I've got a score to settle
with some shrews, and I've
got a pocket full of shells!
707
00:43:42,034 --> 00:43:43,068
He's so valiant!
708
00:43:43,551 --> 00:43:43,793
I know.
709
00:43:44,655 --> 00:43:45,275
Why can't you be like that?
710
00:43:46,137 --> 00:43:47,206
I'm just a literary agent.
711
00:43:54,655 --> 00:43:57,482
[growling]
712
00:44:03,758 --> 00:44:04,241
Rawr!
713
00:44:06,482 --> 00:44:07,517
[shrew noises]
714
00:44:13,241 --> 00:44:14,862
What the Hell happened?
715
00:44:17,000 --> 00:44:17,724
Martin!
716
00:44:19,896 --> 00:44:20,724
Martin!
717
00:44:21,931 --> 00:44:23,448
I'm coming Martin!
718
00:44:25,965 --> 00:44:27,827
I'm coming Martin!
719
00:44:31,724 --> 00:44:33,379
[clunking and clanking]
720
00:44:39,655 --> 00:44:40,517
[puttering]
721
00:44:43,344 --> 00:44:44,724
[crash!]
722
00:44:45,344 --> 00:44:46,068
[beeping]
723
00:44:50,034 --> 00:44:51,000
Goddamnit!
724
00:45:03,344 --> 00:45:04,931
[engine rumbling]
725
00:45:08,000 --> 00:45:08,758
[action music]
726
00:45:09,344 --> 00:45:09,620
[shrew noises]
727
00:45:10,206 --> 00:45:10,551
[KA-BLAM!]
728
00:45:11,517 --> 00:45:12,551
[shrew noises]
729
00:45:13,655 --> 00:45:14,379
[roaring]
730
00:45:17,931 --> 00:45:18,413
Gah!
731
00:45:21,758 --> 00:45:22,310
[KA-BLAM!]
732
00:45:22,931 --> 00:45:23,137
Ha Ha Ha!
733
00:45:23,758 --> 00:45:24,379
[trumpets build]
734
00:45:25,620 --> 00:45:26,137
[BLAM!]
735
00:45:27,655 --> 00:45:30,827
Alright! Come on get
it! Oh yes! [BLAM!]
736
00:45:31,448 --> 00:45:31,965
Oh yes!
737
00:45:32,689 --> 00:45:34,206
Come on then! Cooome on!
738
00:45:34,689 --> 00:45:35,206
[BLAM!]
739
00:45:37,827 --> 00:45:39,068
[trumpets blare!]
740
00:45:40,206 --> 00:45:41,172
[click click]
741
00:45:43,241 --> 00:45:45,241
[music builds, shrew noises]
742
00:45:55,310 --> 00:45:55,827
Uggh!
743
00:45:57,724 --> 00:46:01,827
Alriiight! Come on! Cooome ooon!
744
00:46:02,689 --> 00:46:03,931
I went to Julliard you know!
745
00:46:04,793 --> 00:46:07,137
Uh huh you didn't know that!
746
00:46:08,586 --> 00:46:11,034
I didn't always want to be
a physicist philosopher!
747
00:46:12,517 --> 00:46:16,310
I wanted to be a dancer! I
could have been a dancer!
748
00:46:18,517 --> 00:46:20,344
Let's dance!
749
00:46:20,827 --> 00:46:22,344
AHHH!!
750
00:46:22,965 --> 00:46:23,517
[shrew noises]
751
00:46:24,379 --> 00:46:24,586
[heavy drums, trumpets blare]
752
00:46:25,310 --> 00:46:26,793
[roaring, screaming]
753
00:46:30,172 --> 00:46:30,931
[roaring]
754
00:46:32,103 --> 00:46:33,000
[screaming]
755
00:46:41,034 --> 00:46:41,793
[roaring]
756
00:46:45,137 --> 00:46:46,103
Simon...
757
00:46:47,241 --> 00:46:49,068
Simon you can't be serious!
758
00:46:52,000 --> 00:46:53,827
When have I ever??
759
00:46:54,758 --> 00:46:55,551
Simon!
760
00:46:58,068 --> 00:47:01,344
I am FIONA RAE, Simon!
761
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:06,448
Hmpph! Well she's a hussy!
762
00:47:07,344 --> 00:47:08,034
[hangs up]
763
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:13,827
I'm sorry you didn't make
it to your film, it wasn't
safe for you to be out there.
764
00:47:14,586 --> 00:47:15,724
They fired me...
765
00:47:16,655 --> 00:47:18,482
I've never been.....fired...
766
00:47:20,482 --> 00:47:24,000
Shiiiit! I've been fired from
just about every job except
this one! Ain't no big deal!
767
00:47:24,655 --> 00:47:25,379
[crash]
768
00:47:25,379 --> 00:47:25,896
Sheriff!
769
00:47:26,344 --> 00:47:26,965
Dewey!
770
00:47:27,620 --> 00:47:28,724
Damn it!
771
00:47:29,758 --> 00:47:30,862
You ok Sheriff?
772
00:47:32,000 --> 00:47:33,137
Who's been messing
with my chair!!?
773
00:47:35,517 --> 00:47:36,551
I don't know!
774
00:47:37,137 --> 00:47:37,965
Damn it Dewey!
775
00:47:39,517 --> 00:47:41,482
We'll get that fixed
for ya Sheriff!
776
00:47:42,413 --> 00:47:43,172
Get on it!
777
00:47:44,068 --> 00:47:45,310
Miss Rae!
778
00:47:46,517 --> 00:47:47,620
Dewey...
779
00:47:51,827 --> 00:47:52,551
Damn him..
780
00:47:53,724 --> 00:47:55,965
Martin... what are
we going to do?
781
00:47:55,965 --> 00:47:58,000
I'll tell ya what
we're gonna do..
782
00:47:58,000 --> 00:48:02,310
..we're gonna sit here and wait
for the cavalry to arrive, the
mayor has ordered in the army.
783
00:48:03,310 --> 00:48:05,103
What until then?
784
00:48:07,655 --> 00:48:10,724
You're gonna drink your
coffee...I'm gonna sit on
my desk, and we're gonna get
to know each other better.
785
00:48:15,758 --> 00:48:16,241
Sheriff!
786
00:48:16,724 --> 00:48:17,034
Dewey..
787
00:48:19,068 --> 00:48:21,068
There's some big shot army
guy out there who would like
to have some words with you!
788
00:48:21,689 --> 00:48:22,206
Send him in.
789
00:48:22,724 --> 00:48:23,620
Yessir!
790
00:48:24,965 --> 00:48:26,034
Miss Rae.....
791
00:48:29,172 --> 00:48:30,241
Sorry about that...
792
00:48:30,241 --> 00:48:31,344
What is the hiring process-
793
00:48:33,586 --> 00:48:34,206
Cap'n!
794
00:48:34,931 --> 00:48:35,965
Sheriff Blake.
795
00:48:37,896 --> 00:48:41,344
Holy shit..... Fiona Rae!
796
00:48:43,310 --> 00:48:47,758
The wife and I just went to see
"Tomb of the One-Eyed Weasel"
last night, and we loved it!
797
00:48:49,793 --> 00:48:53,931
That scene... when you were
hanging from the balcony...and
the weasel was right there!!!
798
00:48:54,655 --> 00:48:55,413
Gave me the chills!
799
00:48:57,448 --> 00:49:01,379
Wow! You're more beautiful
in person than you are on
the screen! Fiona Rae...
800
00:49:06,137 --> 00:49:09,103
..men, we are in the
presence of greatness!
801
00:49:09,724 --> 00:49:09,862
[giggling]
802
00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:13,586
Cap'n.... the task
at hand please..
803
00:49:14,931 --> 00:49:17,586
This city is being
invaded by killer shrews.
804
00:49:19,931 --> 00:49:21,344
Killer shrews?
805
00:49:22,724 --> 00:49:24,827
[together] KILLER SHREWS!
806
00:49:25,275 --> 00:49:26,551
Hahaha!
807
00:49:27,517 --> 00:49:29,793
Hahahahahaha!
808
00:49:31,793 --> 00:49:35,827
With all do respect,
SIR, when you are done
laughing, my deputy, who
IS my COUSIN, is DEAD!
809
00:49:39,206 --> 00:49:40,379
Did the shrews kill him?
810
00:49:41,758 --> 00:49:44,068
It was a car accident...but
it was shrew related!
811
00:49:45,275 --> 00:49:46,689
How do you expect me
to believe all this?
812
00:49:46,689 --> 00:49:48,448
Because it's true!
813
00:49:49,896 --> 00:49:53,137
The Thing From Nantucket!
Now that was a good one!
814
00:49:54,000 --> 00:49:55,172
[engine roaring]
815
00:50:08,551 --> 00:50:09,517
[sputtering]
816
00:50:13,551 --> 00:50:14,965
Damn it!
817
00:50:17,931 --> 00:50:18,827
[splashing]
818
00:50:43,620 --> 00:50:47,448
I'm coming Martin! I'm coming
Martin! I'm coming Martin!
819
00:50:50,896 --> 00:50:52,068
[throttle roars]
820
00:51:02,517 --> 00:51:04,206
Mr. Mayor! Mr. Mayor!
821
00:51:04,206 --> 00:51:05,413
Wha? What what??
822
00:51:05,413 --> 00:51:08,448
Snakes snakes snakes
SNAKES SNAKES!!!
823
00:51:09,827 --> 00:51:12,862
Sir! You're just having a
nightmare! I tried to stop them-
824
00:51:12,862 --> 00:51:16,448
John, we got a big problem
on our hands, a shit storm
is a-brewin' out there in the
shape of big ass killer shrews,
and you're in here napping'!
825
00:51:21,620 --> 00:51:23,310
What is the meaning of this?
826
00:51:25,206 --> 00:51:29,206
Your town is being overrun
by ravenous rodents!
People are dying out there!
827
00:51:31,827 --> 00:51:32,448
Floyd...
828
00:51:34,379 --> 00:51:38,827
Why is Fiona Rae in my
office and you didn't
warn me? I look like shit!
829
00:51:40,344 --> 00:51:41,793
Sir! Sorry-
830
00:51:41,793 --> 00:51:45,862
Get out! Get out and get
Miss Rae a cup of tea please!
831
00:51:47,413 --> 00:51:48,620
Oooh! Earl Grey.
832
00:51:50,241 --> 00:51:52,655
Yea... that guy's a retard.
833
00:51:54,034 --> 00:51:57,310
Mayor, I've seen one of
these things... they're huge!
834
00:51:58,827 --> 00:52:02,931
We need to shut down the town! A
curfew is in effect immediately!
835
00:52:04,310 --> 00:52:06,206
We need to exterminate the
infestation before it spreads.
836
00:52:07,310 --> 00:52:09,482
My God, could things
get any worse?
837
00:52:12,241 --> 00:52:14,413
Sir... your wife just called...
838
00:52:15,000 --> 00:52:15,793
..your dog died.
839
00:52:18,413 --> 00:52:19,034
Pugsly?
840
00:52:20,689 --> 00:52:22,034
My little Pugsly?
841
00:52:24,965 --> 00:52:27,206
Sir! The town is a war zone!
842
00:52:28,275 --> 00:52:29,482
This is terrible!
843
00:52:32,000 --> 00:52:35,344
I think the mayor's
gone bye-bye...
844
00:52:36,827 --> 00:52:39,103
What do you need
from us, Captain?
845
00:52:40,517 --> 00:52:43,344
Let's step outside for a
minute... give him a moment.
846
00:52:45,068 --> 00:52:45,965
[sniffling]
847
00:52:47,310 --> 00:52:48,655
My little Pugsly...
848
00:52:52,103 --> 00:52:57,103
First Wayne, now Pugsly...
what's going on in this town?
849
00:52:57,896 --> 00:52:59,206
Mayor major wuss..
850
00:53:02,413 --> 00:53:05,965
We need a map of the
town. Close down all the
streets coming and going.
851
00:53:06,413 --> 00:53:06,655
Done!
852
00:53:08,620 --> 00:53:12,586
We need to gather as much intel
on these things as we can...
find out what makes them tick.
853
00:53:14,137 --> 00:53:17,172
They're shrews, how
complicated can they be?
854
00:53:18,034 --> 00:53:20,310
Girlie, you have no idea.
855
00:53:26,172 --> 00:53:27,620
How much further?
856
00:53:28,793 --> 00:53:30,448
I don't know, I
was following you!
857
00:53:31,137 --> 00:53:32,103
Are you serious?
858
00:53:32,862 --> 00:53:34,206
Yea! I thought you knew!
859
00:53:35,137 --> 00:53:36,206
Who is this guy?
860
00:53:38,137 --> 00:53:39,655
I don't really know...
861
00:53:41,103 --> 00:53:44,137
The name's Wilkens, I own the
saw mill you guys stopped at.
862
00:53:45,689 --> 00:53:48,724
So you own the mill,
but you have no idea
where we are right now?
863
00:53:48,724 --> 00:53:50,517
I never come this way!
864
00:54:04,275 --> 00:54:05,310
[shrew noises]
865
00:54:06,689 --> 00:54:08,655
Ahhhhhh!
866
00:54:09,241 --> 00:54:10,931
Cassandra!
867
00:54:12,000 --> 00:54:12,965
Eeeeeeeee!!!
868
00:54:18,413 --> 00:54:19,206
Cassandra!
869
00:54:22,517 --> 00:54:23,689
They're right behind us!
870
00:54:23,689 --> 00:54:24,758
Cassie!!
871
00:54:33,586 --> 00:54:35,068
And what's this here?
872
00:54:35,068 --> 00:54:38,172
That's the old saw mills...it's
in the outskirts of the city.
873
00:54:39,344 --> 00:54:41,655
I can see that. It's
a good vantage point.
874
00:54:41,655 --> 00:54:44,931
Take a couple of guys and get
there. Make sure it's secure..
875
00:54:46,551 --> 00:54:49,000
..leave my men there and
we'll rendezvous back
here at fifteen-hundred.
876
00:54:49,620 --> 00:54:50,413
Sure thing.
877
00:54:52,034 --> 00:54:54,862
And I'm gonna deeter
some skeeters with my
Deter Insect RepellentC©.
878
00:54:55,862 --> 00:54:57,000
Fiona!
879
00:54:58,172 --> 00:55:00,758
Fiona Rae... you
are one lucky guy.
880
00:55:01,482 --> 00:55:02,413
It's not what you think.
881
00:55:03,862 --> 00:55:07,000
Sir, you're needed back at
the barracks right away.
882
00:55:13,413 --> 00:55:14,896
Thank you Mrs. Rae!!
883
00:55:14,896 --> 00:55:17,517
Looks like I'm gonna have
to scoot. Duty calls.
884
00:55:19,137 --> 00:55:21,655
The town is on lockdown,
and I think you'll be
safest by staying here.
885
00:55:22,482 --> 00:55:23,689
Can't I come with you?
886
00:55:23,689 --> 00:55:26,241
Not this time.
Way too dangerous.
887
00:55:27,034 --> 00:55:27,689
If you say so..
888
00:55:28,137 --> 00:55:28,896
I do.
889
00:55:29,620 --> 00:55:31,103
I'll see you soon.
890
00:55:31,862 --> 00:55:35,896
[sentimental score]
891
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:43,034
Blake! Blake!
892
00:55:43,793 --> 00:55:45,206
You kill those shrews!
893
00:55:47,000 --> 00:55:47,689
[DING!]
894
00:55:56,241 --> 00:55:57,724
[low, creeping tone]
895
00:55:58,724 --> 00:55:59,758
Cassie!
896
00:56:31,793 --> 00:56:32,551
Cassandra!
897
00:56:34,551 --> 00:56:37,793
Careful with the yellin', boy!
The reverberations can bring
this whole thing down on us!
898
00:56:38,724 --> 00:56:40,103
Better that than
eaten by shrews.
899
00:56:44,275 --> 00:56:46,620
I just can't believe
it's happening again..
900
00:56:47,482 --> 00:56:49,896
What do you mean "again"?
901
00:56:51,103 --> 00:56:51,965
Eeee!!
902
00:56:52,758 --> 00:56:55,862
I wanna go to Bermuda!!
903
00:56:56,310 --> 00:56:57,965
OK...OK!
904
00:56:58,551 --> 00:56:59,551
We can do that..
905
00:57:00,931 --> 00:57:03,034
These shrews'll be
on us any minute!
906
00:57:05,103 --> 00:57:07,724
Let's follow the
creepy Scottish guy..
907
00:57:11,068 --> 00:57:13,241
Come on, let's take this tunnel!
908
00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:23,413
This is a dead end!
909
00:57:24,862 --> 00:57:26,413
Well that's good! We'll get
our back against the wall!
910
00:57:27,965 --> 00:57:29,758
We're trapped! How is that good?
911
00:57:31,137 --> 00:57:32,517
Well they can't sneak up
on us, the sneaky bastards!
912
00:57:34,448 --> 00:57:38,241
Wilkens, this isn't your
first encounter with
killer shrews... is it...
913
00:57:39,827 --> 00:57:43,344
You youngsters take a seat
and I'll tell you a tale.
914
00:57:51,931 --> 00:57:54,310
I come from the village
of Killiecrankie.
915
00:57:55,172 --> 00:57:56,413
I've never heard of that before?
916
00:57:56,413 --> 00:57:58,965
It's in Scotland. I left
when I was a wee boy.
917
00:58:00,137 --> 00:58:01,965
It seems I brought these
creatures with me..
918
00:58:03,103 --> 00:58:05,517
That doesn't make any
sense. What do you mean?
919
00:58:07,965 --> 00:58:11,379
Ah it was a long time ago...
huge man eating shrews
stormed the village wiping
out everything in their path!
920
00:58:13,655 --> 00:58:16,172
I was lucky. Me
and a few others..
921
00:58:19,241 --> 00:58:21,758
That doesn't make any sense.
Murdock told us that he
created them in his lab
when he was experimenting
with a cure for rabies...
922
00:58:23,758 --> 00:58:25,206
..it just doesn't make
sense. How could they have
gotten here from Scotland?
923
00:58:27,689 --> 00:58:30,655
Murdock, eh? There was a
Murdock in the village...
crazy guy. Our parents
told us not to talk to him.
924
00:58:33,241 --> 00:58:35,034
That seems highly coincidental..
925
00:58:37,000 --> 00:58:41,034
Or not! You kids don't
have to sit on the ground,
there's plenty boxes!
926
00:58:46,034 --> 00:58:47,241
Holy shit!
927
00:58:47,862 --> 00:58:48,965
Hot diggity!
928
00:58:50,000 --> 00:58:51,620
This'll blow them up!
929
00:58:52,206 --> 00:58:53,241
[shrew noises]
930
00:58:55,862 --> 00:58:57,448
Derrr duhh duhhh buhhh!
931
00:58:58,931 --> 00:59:00,793
I'll keep them
busy, you guys go!
932
00:59:00,793 --> 00:59:02,827
That's what the professor
said and he's not coming back!
933
00:59:02,827 --> 00:59:05,275
Ah, I'm old. I've had my fun..
934
00:59:05,275 --> 00:59:09,724
Go to the saw mill, there's
a shoe box in my office...
you'll find everything
you're lookin' for..
935
00:59:10,586 --> 00:59:12,241
..Murdock, I should have known.
936
00:59:13,586 --> 00:59:14,620
[shrew noises]
937
00:59:15,310 --> 00:59:16,310
[dramatic music]
938
00:59:20,034 --> 00:59:20,551
[fuse ignites]
939
00:59:21,137 --> 00:59:21,758
[hissing]
940
00:59:23,206 --> 00:59:26,965
Alright, ya rat bastard shrew
sonsabitches! COME AND GET IT!
941
00:59:28,344 --> 00:59:30,758
Hahahaha!
942
00:59:33,310 --> 00:59:36,241
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
943
00:59:36,862 --> 00:59:38,862
[screaming]
944
00:59:43,068 --> 00:59:43,862
[hiss, shrew noises]
945
00:59:44,448 --> 00:59:45,655
[KA-BOOM!]
946
00:59:49,413 --> 00:59:50,620
[crickets]
947
00:59:57,068 --> 00:59:58,275
There it is!
948
00:59:58,275 --> 00:59:59,724
I've never had to shit
so bad in my life!
949
00:59:59,724 --> 01:00:00,206
Lewis!
950
01:00:00,689 --> 01:00:00,862
EVER!!
951
01:00:01,448 --> 01:00:01,931
Hold it!!!
952
01:00:05,827 --> 01:00:07,689
Oh thank God we're saved!
953
01:00:08,862 --> 01:00:10,482
What the Hell are you
two doing way out here?
954
01:00:11,793 --> 01:00:14,448
Don't you know there's....KILLER
SHREWS... everywhere?!
955
01:00:15,034 --> 01:00:16,068
They're OK.
956
01:00:17,655 --> 01:00:18,241
[military music]
957
01:00:19,137 --> 01:00:20,275
They're with me.
958
01:00:20,896 --> 01:00:21,344
Oh thank God..
959
01:00:22,931 --> 01:00:25,206
I'm glad to see you two
made it out alright.
Where's the professor?
960
01:00:26,034 --> 01:00:26,551
No..
961
01:00:28,620 --> 01:00:30,034
Get us out of here Sheriff!
962
01:00:30,931 --> 01:00:32,413
Get these two some place safe!
963
01:00:33,000 --> 01:00:33,689
Sir yes sir!
964
01:00:35,448 --> 01:00:35,965
Ma'am.
965
01:00:38,344 --> 01:00:40,034
Hold on Sheriff... I have
something to tell you...
966
01:00:40,827 --> 01:00:42,103
Cassie, you go on.
967
01:00:43,620 --> 01:00:46,103
Any time anyone ever says
that they never come back!
968
01:00:54,655 --> 01:00:55,827
[slobbering]
969
01:00:57,862 --> 01:00:58,758
Ahem!
970
01:00:59,724 --> 01:01:00,793
I'll wait for you.
971
01:01:02,310 --> 01:01:02,827
[dramatic score]
972
01:01:03,689 --> 01:01:05,620
Hut hut hut hut hut hut hut!
973
01:01:06,482 --> 01:01:07,827
Whatchu talkin' bout Lewis?!
974
01:01:09,896 --> 01:01:12,448
The guy that owned the mill, he
told me something that might be
useful. I'll show you, come on!
975
01:01:14,551 --> 01:01:16,206
What the fuck is a shrew anyway?
976
01:01:16,965 --> 01:01:17,931
I have no fuckin' idea.
977
01:01:18,655 --> 01:01:19,827
We're about to find out!
978
01:01:21,758 --> 01:01:24,620
He said it was up here...
in an old shoe box..
979
01:01:25,448 --> 01:01:26,620
Yahtzee!
980
01:01:32,413 --> 01:01:33,034
[thud]
981
01:01:33,965 --> 01:01:35,034
It's junk!
982
01:01:35,931 --> 01:01:37,413
Who does that look like to you?
983
01:01:38,482 --> 01:01:39,862
Looks like Murdock.
984
01:01:42,275 --> 01:01:45,000
Holy shit... I think I
know what's happening!
985
01:01:46,172 --> 01:01:46,965
Good cuz I don't
have a fuckin' clue!
986
01:01:47,724 --> 01:01:49,551
Murdock... where is he?
987
01:01:51,620 --> 01:01:54,551
His body got thrown from the
car during the crash! Shoulda
seen it he went flyyyyyiiiing!
988
01:01:56,137 --> 01:01:58,655
And his body? Did you recover
it? Do you know where it is?
989
01:01:58,655 --> 01:02:01,758
No he's gone, just like I
told you! Just like Wayne!
990
01:02:04,344 --> 01:02:06,103
We need to get back to town.
991
01:02:06,862 --> 01:02:08,275
Alright! Let's go!
992
01:02:09,517 --> 01:02:13,206
[maniacal giggling]
993
01:02:21,862 --> 01:02:26,862
Alright! Listen up! This
is it men! It's either us
or these damn shrews! And
you know what they say...
994
01:02:29,379 --> 01:02:31,379
..ya shrews, ya lose!
995
01:02:33,931 --> 01:02:35,758
Sir! We have a visual on
the shrews! They're heading
this way and they'll be on
top of us within minutes!
996
01:02:38,862 --> 01:02:40,862
Beautiful! Alright, listen up!
This is where I give my big
inspirational speech letting
you sissies know that some
of you ain't gonna make it!
997
01:02:44,034 --> 01:02:46,137
Nobody dies without
my permission!
998
01:02:49,172 --> 01:02:52,034
Let's secure the left perimeter,
secure the right perimeter!
We'll drag 'em all into the
mill and bring the whole fuckin'
thing down on their heads!
999
01:02:55,310 --> 01:02:57,137
We're gonna leave it here today!
1000
01:02:59,206 --> 01:03:02,413
We're gonna cover this place
in shrew blood! It's gonna
be biblical! Who's with me?
1001
01:03:02,413 --> 01:03:03,448
Yes sir yes sir!
1002
01:03:03,448 --> 01:03:04,517
Let's go!
1003
01:03:04,517 --> 01:03:05,103
[bonk!]
1004
01:03:06,620 --> 01:03:07,724
Sorry, sir!
1005
01:03:13,103 --> 01:03:16,344
Get your ass up son! We're
here to slay rodents!
1006
01:03:16,344 --> 01:03:17,793
SIR YES SIR!
1007
01:03:17,793 --> 01:03:19,965
Now I need you to get
upstairs, and get ready to-
1008
01:03:20,413 --> 01:03:20,551
Arrggh!
1009
01:03:21,137 --> 01:03:21,931
[shrew noises]
1010
01:03:24,000 --> 01:03:25,758
[machine gun fire]
1011
01:03:26,344 --> 01:03:27,000
[action music]
1012
01:03:29,000 --> 01:03:32,413
What the Hell's the matter
with you boy?! Get your ass
up, we got shrews to kill!
1013
01:03:32,413 --> 01:03:32,931
Sir yes sir-
1014
01:03:33,655 --> 01:03:35,068
Cowboy up! Yeeeee-haw!
1015
01:03:35,689 --> 01:03:35,827
Yeeeeee-haaa!
1016
01:03:36,275 --> 01:03:36,620
Let's go
1017
01:03:38,103 --> 01:03:43,103
Hut hut hut hut hut hut hut
hut hut hut hut hut hut!
1018
01:03:52,137 --> 01:03:52,655
[crunching]
1019
01:04:00,344 --> 01:04:01,000
[shrew noises]
1020
01:04:01,620 --> 01:04:02,344
EEEEEEEEEE!!!!
1021
01:04:02,827 --> 01:04:03,620
[roar]
1022
01:04:03,620 --> 01:04:04,551
Sonofa bitchin' beaver!
1023
01:04:04,551 --> 01:04:07,827
[machine gun fire, screaming]
1024
01:04:08,413 --> 01:04:08,551
Sonofabitch!
1025
01:04:09,137 --> 01:04:09,448
[roaring]
1026
01:04:10,172 --> 01:04:11,931
[machine gun fire]
1027
01:04:13,206 --> 01:04:15,206
[machine gun fire]
1028
01:04:16,103 --> 01:04:17,310
[punches, kicks]
1029
01:04:17,931 --> 01:04:18,896
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!!
1030
01:04:19,620 --> 01:04:20,310
[machine gun fire]
1031
01:04:21,034 --> 01:04:22,172
[gunshots]
1032
01:04:23,655 --> 01:04:24,724
Ahhhhhhh!
1033
01:04:27,620 --> 01:04:28,206
Mom
1034
01:04:28,827 --> 01:04:29,103
[roaring]
1035
01:04:35,724 --> 01:04:36,758
[shrew noises]
1036
01:04:37,344 --> 01:04:38,000
[roaring]
1037
01:04:41,448 --> 01:04:42,724
Ahhh!
1038
01:04:43,310 --> 01:04:44,310
[shrew noises]
1039
01:04:50,241 --> 01:04:51,344
Ahhh!
1040
01:04:52,931 --> 01:04:53,793
Ahhhhhhh!
1041
01:04:55,827 --> 01:04:57,241
[action score ends]
1042
01:05:01,172 --> 01:05:01,724
[SQUEAK!]
1043
01:05:03,758 --> 01:05:04,241
Ah!
1044
01:05:05,137 --> 01:05:05,724
[thump]
1045
01:05:09,034 --> 01:05:10,068
[shrew noises]
1046
01:05:14,965 --> 01:05:16,068
[panting]
1047
01:05:18,931 --> 01:05:19,965
[shrew noises]
1048
01:05:22,379 --> 01:05:25,413
They're everywhere! Get
the Hell out of here!
1049
01:05:26,000 --> 01:05:26,793
[shrew noises]
1050
01:05:28,620 --> 01:05:29,551
[thunk thunk]
1051
01:05:30,965 --> 01:05:32,000
[shrew noises]
1052
01:05:35,310 --> 01:05:38,448
[explosion]
1053
01:05:41,137 --> 01:05:44,931
Yep! Biblical! Haha!
1054
01:05:47,620 --> 01:05:52,620
I assure you Miss Rae,
you're safe here for the time
being! We've taken over this
house as our command center.
1055
01:05:54,068 --> 01:05:55,724
No shrews are getting' in here!
1056
01:05:55,724 --> 01:05:56,344
[shrew screeches]
1057
01:05:56,965 --> 01:05:57,482
What the Hell!?
1058
01:06:00,517 --> 01:06:01,000
[blam!]
1059
01:06:06,241 --> 01:06:10,413
That was a freak
occurrence! It must have
gotten in here before us!
1060
01:06:12,482 --> 01:06:16,103
Captain, I am trained
in the operation of most
firearms. I have to be
for my feature films...
1061
01:06:18,413 --> 01:06:21,241
I would feel a lot
safer if I had a gun!
1062
01:06:23,137 --> 01:06:26,517
Hahaha! A gun? Sweetheart,
this is not the movies.
Leave the heavy stuff for us.
1063
01:06:29,241 --> 01:06:30,034
[knocking]
1064
01:06:30,034 --> 01:06:31,793
[doorbell ringing]
1065
01:06:35,758 --> 01:06:36,310
Open it.
1066
01:06:38,000 --> 01:06:40,586
Woah woah woah!
Slow down, Turbo!
1067
01:06:41,310 --> 01:06:42,586
Where is Captain Frost?
1068
01:06:43,034 --> 01:06:44,172
Blake!
Fiona!
1069
01:06:45,103 --> 01:06:45,931
They're OK.
1070
01:06:51,379 --> 01:06:52,827
Miss Rae, I'm so glad
that you're alive-
1071
01:06:52,827 --> 01:06:56,137
EWWW Lewis! You stink!
1072
01:06:57,448 --> 01:06:58,448
Where's your girlfriend?
1073
01:06:59,862 --> 01:07:01,758
Not exactly sure... she's
in good hands though.
1074
01:07:05,896 --> 01:07:07,137
I'm Captain Frost.
1075
01:07:08,000 --> 01:07:09,448
Lewis Fontana. Literary agent.
[squishing]
1076
01:07:10,551 --> 01:07:12,413
This is Lieutenant Falcon.
1077
01:07:13,310 --> 01:07:13,862
[bark!]
1078
01:07:15,068 --> 01:07:17,896
Mittens! Mittens! Where
the Hell's Mittens?
1079
01:07:18,482 --> 01:07:19,724
Right here, sir!
1080
01:07:19,724 --> 01:07:21,310
Where the Hell you been?
1081
01:07:22,103 --> 01:07:24,275
Right here, sir!
Don't do that to me boy!
1082
01:07:24,275 --> 01:07:24,862
Yes sir!
1083
01:07:26,137 --> 01:07:27,862
Take Mr. Fontana
upstairs to be debriefed!
1084
01:07:27,862 --> 01:07:29,034
Yes sir, you got it boss!
1085
01:07:32,827 --> 01:07:33,310
C'mon!
1086
01:07:37,517 --> 01:07:39,206
The mill is secure, Cap'n!
1087
01:07:39,827 --> 01:07:42,344
That's great, I-
1088
01:07:42,344 --> 01:07:44,517
[radio] Captain Frost!
Captain Frost! Come in
Captain Frost! They're
breaking through the wire!
1089
01:07:44,517 --> 01:07:48,413
[radio]
There
are
dozens
of
them!
Coordinates
niner-niner-whiskey-do-the-tango!
1090
01:07:49,896 --> 01:07:52,724
What the Hell?? Hold the line!
1091
01:07:53,827 --> 01:07:55,655
I'm so glad you're here!
1092
01:07:58,172 --> 01:08:01,034
Me too! Hey get this:
That doctor guy? Murdock?
Seems like he's got an
interesting family tree...
1093
01:08:04,344 --> 01:08:04,862
Oh?
1094
01:08:06,275 --> 01:08:10,482
His grandfather went nuts
in a small Scottish village!
1095
01:08:11,655 --> 01:08:14,896
He created gigantic
murderous shrews!
1096
01:08:16,275 --> 01:08:20,103
Wipin' out every man,
woman and child for miles!
1097
01:08:20,965 --> 01:08:21,482
Oh my God!
1098
01:08:22,862 --> 01:08:25,448
How is that possible?
1099
01:08:25,448 --> 01:08:29,275
Well, he told us he was looking
for a rabies cure. What he was
really doing was following in
his grandfather's footsteps.
1100
01:08:35,482 --> 01:08:38,689
Now obviously he's a few
cans short of a six pack.
1101
01:08:39,827 --> 01:08:41,689
But after he succeeded...
1102
01:08:42,793 --> 01:08:46,241
He created gigantic
killer shrews!
1103
01:08:47,896 --> 01:08:52,482
I don't know if he
planned on having them
escape, but they did!
1104
01:08:54,482 --> 01:08:58,965
I think he was going to use
them to conquer the town...
maybe even conquer the world!
1105
01:09:03,758 --> 01:09:07,103
This is complete madness!
How did I even get here?
1106
01:09:07,103 --> 01:09:09,586
Well, your car broke down and-
1107
01:09:09,586 --> 01:09:13,551
This is so much like a
movie! Giant killer rodents!
An evil scientist with
a chip on his shoulder!
1108
01:09:16,241 --> 01:09:19,172
A glamorous leading lady...
1109
01:09:20,620 --> 01:09:23,344
If this were a movie, this
would be the third act!
1110
01:09:24,206 --> 01:09:25,931
The third act! What's that??
1111
01:09:27,068 --> 01:09:29,551
It means we're about
to reach the climax...
1112
01:09:30,000 --> 01:09:31,448
[BLAM!]
[rustling]
1113
01:09:32,655 --> 01:09:35,655
It just went off!
It just went off!
1114
01:09:35,655 --> 01:09:38,000
Calm down, bring it back!
1115
01:09:39,379 --> 01:09:43,241
Calm down! Bring it back!
It's over! It's over!
1116
01:09:44,931 --> 01:09:47,965
[radio] Sir, I have the
president of the United
States on channel one!
1117
01:09:47,965 --> 01:09:49,413
Patch him through.
1118
01:09:50,413 --> 01:09:51,517
[radio] Captain Frost..
1119
01:09:52,310 --> 01:09:53,206
Mr. President.
1120
01:09:54,620 --> 01:09:56,965
You must be absolutely
certain of this decision.
1121
01:09:57,689 --> 01:09:58,965
Affirmative! Drop it!
1122
01:10:00,275 --> 01:10:02,896
All those people...
evacuate as many as you can!
1123
01:10:03,620 --> 01:10:06,103
Yes sir! Nuke 'em...
1124
01:10:07,000 --> 01:10:08,206
I've told you everything I know!
1125
01:10:09,068 --> 01:10:10,172
You ain't told us shit, bitch!
1126
01:10:12,068 --> 01:10:13,551
That's because I don't know
anything! There's killer
shrews running around-
KILLER SHREWS!
1127
01:10:13,551 --> 01:10:15,448
What more do you need??
1128
01:10:15,448 --> 01:10:18,172
Killer shrews! Say
something else for a Goddamn
change, how 'bout that?
1129
01:10:20,448 --> 01:10:21,068
Mittens!
1130
01:10:21,551 --> 01:10:21,793
Sir..
1131
01:10:23,620 --> 01:10:24,655
Boy's a tough one
sir, I don't know...
1132
01:10:26,034 --> 01:10:28,517
Forget him! Gather up the
men, we're moving out!
1133
01:10:29,000 --> 01:10:29,206
Yes sir!
1134
01:10:30,413 --> 01:10:32,000
Hey uh, shrews are
here! We gotta go!
1135
01:10:32,620 --> 01:10:32,965
We're out!
1136
01:10:38,241 --> 01:10:40,724
Do you think I can get
your autograph now?
1137
01:10:41,724 --> 01:10:42,620
Absolutely.
1138
01:10:43,379 --> 01:10:44,000
Make it out to Martin.
1139
01:10:44,000 --> 01:10:44,517
[giggle]
1140
01:10:46,103 --> 01:10:50,413
Miss Rae. Sheriff....
we're leaving, and I
suggest you do the same.
1141
01:10:51,586 --> 01:10:52,965
Something wrong Cap'n?
1142
01:10:52,965 --> 01:10:53,931
They're on their way.
1143
01:10:53,931 --> 01:10:55,241
Oh no, they're here already!
1144
01:10:55,241 --> 01:10:55,931
Quiet!
1145
01:10:57,103 --> 01:10:59,758
But I thought you said
this place was safe?
1146
01:10:59,758 --> 01:11:03,448
From the shrews, yes...
well, maybe. But not from
the big-ass nuke that's
about to hit the city!
1147
01:11:04,172 --> 01:11:05,413
[together] WHAT?!?
1148
01:11:05,413 --> 01:11:08,000
I've said enough!
Men, we're out!
1149
01:11:09,758 --> 01:11:10,931
Get the door, son.
1150
01:11:12,827 --> 01:11:13,551
[roaring]
1151
01:11:14,275 --> 01:11:15,103
[machine gun fire]
1152
01:11:15,724 --> 01:11:15,862
[screaming]
1153
01:11:16,586 --> 01:11:19,551
Kill 'em men! Shoot!
1154
01:11:20,137 --> 01:11:20,344
[gunshots]
1155
01:11:21,482 --> 01:11:22,482
There's more coming
through the door, men!!!
1156
01:11:22,482 --> 01:11:23,172
Get 'em!
1157
01:11:24,034 --> 01:11:25,448
[screaming, machine gun fire]
There's so many!
1158
01:11:26,034 --> 01:11:27,000
[shrew noises]
1159
01:11:27,586 --> 01:11:27,862
[gunfire]
1160
01:11:28,724 --> 01:11:29,551
There's too many of them!
1161
01:11:30,413 --> 01:11:30,758
[shrews screeching, gunshots]
1162
01:11:31,758 --> 01:11:33,413
[screaming]
1163
01:11:34,000 --> 01:11:34,482
Jimmy, no!!
1164
01:11:35,310 --> 01:11:36,586
Ahhhhh!!! [chomp!]
1165
01:11:37,310 --> 01:11:38,137
Jimmy!! Get up!!!
1166
01:11:38,137 --> 01:11:40,103
[Wilhelm scream!]
1167
01:11:40,724 --> 01:11:41,379
[gunshots]
1168
01:11:41,862 --> 01:11:42,551
Jimmy!!!
1169
01:11:43,620 --> 01:11:44,517
Jimmy!!
1170
01:11:45,137 --> 01:11:45,275
[screaming]
1171
01:11:46,034 --> 01:11:46,931
They killed Jimmy!!!!!!
1172
01:11:47,689 --> 01:11:48,206
[explosion of gunfire]
1173
01:11:49,931 --> 01:11:51,103
Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!
1174
01:11:52,137 --> 01:11:53,517
[roaring, gunfire]
1175
01:11:56,344 --> 01:11:58,068
[screaming, machine gunfire]
1176
01:11:58,724 --> 01:11:59,310
Jimmy!!!!!
1177
01:12:01,551 --> 01:12:03,137
What are those things?!
1178
01:12:03,137 --> 01:12:04,379
I have no clue!!!
1179
01:12:04,379 --> 01:12:06,517
I think...I think
they're shrews!
1180
01:12:06,517 --> 01:12:07,517
What's a fucking shrew?!
1181
01:12:07,517 --> 01:12:08,620
I don't fucking know!!!
1182
01:12:08,620 --> 01:12:09,275
[screaming]
1183
01:12:09,275 --> 01:12:10,241
[roaring]
1184
01:12:11,724 --> 01:12:12,206
[yelping]
1185
01:12:13,586 --> 01:12:14,068
[machine gunfire, growling]
1186
01:12:14,758 --> 01:12:15,517
Ahhhhhhh!
1187
01:12:16,000 --> 01:12:16,931
[BANG!]
[BANG]
1188
01:12:17,517 --> 01:12:17,862
Ahhhhh!!!!!!
1189
01:12:18,724 --> 01:12:22,448
Die! Die ahhhhhhh!! Die ahhhhhh!
1190
01:12:23,034 --> 01:12:23,241
[shrew noises]
1191
01:12:24,000 --> 01:12:24,827
[machine gunfire]
1192
01:12:26,758 --> 01:12:30,827
This is Sheriff Blake! Do
not drop the nuke! I repeat,
do not drop the nuke!
1193
01:12:31,758 --> 01:12:33,000
[machine gunfire]
1194
01:12:33,000 --> 01:12:34,448
You have to press that
button and hold it down!
1195
01:12:34,448 --> 01:12:35,103
Duh!!
1196
01:12:35,103 --> 01:12:36,551
[screaming]
1197
01:12:36,551 --> 01:12:38,724
This is Sheriff Martin
Blake! Don't drop the nuke!
1198
01:12:39,896 --> 01:12:40,896
[radio] Sorry dude, this
is a restricted line.
1199
01:12:41,586 --> 01:12:42,793
You sonofabitch!
1200
01:12:42,793 --> 01:12:44,379
We have to find Cassandra!
1201
01:12:44,379 --> 01:12:45,000
Let's go!
1202
01:12:45,758 --> 01:12:46,620
[roaring, gunshots]
1203
01:12:48,068 --> 01:12:49,103
[shrew noises]
1204
01:12:50,379 --> 01:12:52,551
Oh sweet baby Jesus, I'm comin'!
1205
01:12:55,413 --> 01:12:57,241
Sonofabitch rat bastards!
1206
01:12:58,310 --> 01:12:59,034
[grunting]
1207
01:13:00,103 --> 01:13:03,344
Gimme a sec.... OK we're good!
1208
01:13:04,137 --> 01:13:05,068
Die! [BLAM!] [BLAM!]
1209
01:13:05,068 --> 01:13:06,344
Don't you know who I am?!
1210
01:13:06,827 --> 01:13:07,620
[BLAM!]
1211
01:13:07,620 --> 01:13:09,034
I'm Captain Jack Frost!
1212
01:13:09,034 --> 01:13:11,000
[BLAM!]
Die! [BLAM!] Die!!
1213
01:13:11,000 --> 01:13:12,689
Ahhhhhhhhh!!!
[animal grunts]
1214
01:13:12,689 --> 01:13:14,000
It's humping me!!
1215
01:13:14,000 --> 01:13:15,034
Get it off!
1216
01:13:15,655 --> 01:13:18,827
[deep breathing]
1217
01:13:19,413 --> 01:13:19,758
[action music]
1218
01:13:20,965 --> 01:13:22,827
[hiss]
1219
01:13:36,793 --> 01:13:37,827
[shrew noises]
1220
01:13:39,137 --> 01:13:39,862
[roaring]
1221
01:13:40,310 --> 01:13:40,655
[BLAM!]
1222
01:13:45,275 --> 01:13:45,862
[BLAM!]
1223
01:13:47,586 --> 01:13:48,137
[BLAM!]
1224
01:13:52,448 --> 01:13:53,103
[CRACK!]
1225
01:13:54,206 --> 01:13:54,931
[roaring]
1226
01:13:56,068 --> 01:13:57,241
[shrew screeches,
deep breathing]
1227
01:13:58,862 --> 01:13:59,413
[BLAM!]
1228
01:14:04,620 --> 01:14:06,862
Dude, why is he moving so slow?
1229
01:14:06,862 --> 01:14:07,724
I don't know!
1230
01:14:09,965 --> 01:14:10,689
Yo! Hey fellas!
1231
01:14:15,034 --> 01:14:16,482
Guys I think I'm good!
1232
01:14:17,206 --> 01:14:18,068
Aw they got Mittens!
1233
01:14:18,689 --> 01:14:19,448
No, no I'm OK!
1234
01:14:20,034 --> 01:14:20,310
Are you ok?
1235
01:14:21,758 --> 01:14:23,172
Uhhhh... nope, nope, they got
Ol' Mittens good this time!
1236
01:14:23,655 --> 01:14:24,172
[bang!]
1237
01:14:24,931 --> 01:14:26,724
OW! Goddamnit!
1238
01:14:26,724 --> 01:14:27,724
Come on!
1239
01:14:28,448 --> 01:14:30,000
[machine gunfire]
1240
01:14:33,448 --> 01:14:34,482
Fellas come on!
1241
01:14:34,482 --> 01:14:35,275
Aw bitch!
1242
01:14:35,275 --> 01:14:36,068
Shoot him in the head!
1243
01:14:36,068 --> 01:14:36,931
[machine gunfire]
1244
01:14:37,620 --> 01:14:41,448
[gunshots]
1245
01:14:57,758 --> 01:14:59,103
Where is everybody?
1246
01:14:59,586 --> 01:15:00,379
Steve!
1247
01:15:00,965 --> 01:15:02,000
JIMMY!
1248
01:15:03,965 --> 01:15:05,034
Derp derp derp...
1249
01:15:05,793 --> 01:15:06,241
...derp derp derp.
1250
01:15:16,827 --> 01:15:17,310
Well that's spooky!
1251
01:15:19,000 --> 01:15:20,310
[war noises] Kill
the shrews!!!!!
1252
01:15:21,034 --> 01:15:22,344
[gunfire, whimpering]
1253
01:15:24,793 --> 01:15:25,275
[screaming]
1254
01:15:27,344 --> 01:15:31,413
They left me! They left me
all alone! GASP! They left
me all alone! AHHHHH!!!!!
1255
01:15:32,000 --> 01:15:33,034
AHHHHHHHHH!!!
1256
01:15:33,931 --> 01:15:34,551
[SPLAT!]
1257
01:15:36,000 --> 01:15:36,655
[VROOM!]
1258
01:15:38,413 --> 01:15:39,206
[gunshots]
1259
01:15:43,206 --> 01:15:44,034
You go help those guys!
1260
01:15:44,517 --> 01:15:44,862
Yessir!
1261
01:15:46,827 --> 01:15:50,931
Redirect the nuke! Redirect
the nuke! Do whatever you
gotta do for the love of God!
1262
01:15:52,827 --> 01:15:54,310
There's the sergeant!
1263
01:15:54,310 --> 01:15:56,862
The blondie! The
civilian! Where is she?!
1264
01:15:56,862 --> 01:15:58,137
We got separated!!
1265
01:15:58,137 --> 01:16:00,344
[gunshots, chomping, screaming]
1266
01:16:00,344 --> 01:16:03,241
If I were you I'd get your
fuckin' asses out of here!
It's coming! It's coming!
1267
01:16:06,241 --> 01:16:07,206
There she is!
1268
01:16:07,206 --> 01:16:08,482
Cassandra!
1269
01:16:08,965 --> 01:16:09,379
Lewis!
1270
01:16:10,827 --> 01:16:13,965
Fiona! It's way too dangerous!
You're gonna have to stay here!
1271
01:16:13,965 --> 01:16:16,517
I'm not staying here
without a weapon!
1272
01:16:16,517 --> 01:16:17,206
[squish!]
1273
01:16:18,379 --> 01:16:21,379
There you go! You go
kill those shrews!
1274
01:16:22,172 --> 01:16:24,103
[kung fu flute]
1275
01:16:24,724 --> 01:16:24,965
[roaring]
1276
01:16:25,689 --> 01:16:27,137
[machine gunfire]
1277
01:16:27,758 --> 01:16:28,517
[roaring]
1278
01:16:29,241 --> 01:16:31,034
[machine gunfire]
1279
01:16:32,000 --> 01:16:34,172
[roaring]
[machine gunfire]
1280
01:16:34,862 --> 01:16:35,758
[screaming]
1281
01:16:36,413 --> 01:16:37,448
[action music]
1282
01:16:49,793 --> 01:16:50,517
Uhh! Uggh!
1283
01:16:51,620 --> 01:16:55,448
Jimmy! Stop fucking
with me Jimmy!
1284
01:16:57,517 --> 01:16:59,689
AHHHH! [fart!]
1285
01:17:02,689 --> 01:17:03,241
Hold on!
1286
01:17:10,448 --> 01:17:15,448
Hey baby! What's your name? My
friends call me Zero but you
can call me whatever you want!
1287
01:17:16,862 --> 01:17:20,137
Come on baby don't be shy!
What's your sign? I'm a Virgo!
1288
01:17:20,137 --> 01:17:23,862
Hey, we should take a ride
in the countryside with the
top down, your top off..
1289
01:17:24,793 --> 01:17:29,517
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
1290
01:17:32,448 --> 01:17:36,379
Yea keep walking! Women..
1291
01:17:38,758 --> 01:17:41,206
Oh... hey there buddy, you lost?
1292
01:17:42,586 --> 01:17:43,551
Come here boy!
1293
01:17:44,137 --> 01:17:44,310
[danger music]
1294
01:17:45,724 --> 01:17:47,413
You don't have a collar!
I'm gonna name you Biscuit!
1295
01:17:47,413 --> 01:17:49,827
Hey, Biscuit! Come here boy!
1296
01:17:49,827 --> 01:17:52,965
Roll over! Roll over,
Biscuit! You're a good boy!
1297
01:17:52,965 --> 01:17:53,448
[shrew noises]
1298
01:17:55,172 --> 01:17:58,310
[roaring]
AHHHHHH!!!!!
1299
01:17:59,275 --> 01:18:00,137
[growling]
1300
01:18:02,862 --> 01:18:04,137
Let's get her and get
the Hell out of here!
1301
01:18:04,758 --> 01:18:05,344
Cassandra!!
1302
01:18:05,965 --> 01:18:06,310
[war noises]
1303
01:18:09,517 --> 01:18:11,034
[roaring] [grunting]
1304
01:18:12,103 --> 01:18:15,758
I'm sorry! I'm
sorry! I'm sorrrryyy!
1305
01:18:15,758 --> 01:18:19,034
I'm sorrrry! I'm sorrrryyy!
1306
01:18:19,793 --> 01:18:21,172
[spitting] I'm sorry!
1307
01:18:22,275 --> 01:18:24,241
I hope you don't have diseases!
1308
01:18:25,034 --> 01:18:26,862
Eeeeeeee!!!
1309
01:18:33,000 --> 01:18:36,275
[girly scream!]
1310
01:18:37,000 --> 01:18:38,620
[terrifying theme!]
1311
01:18:39,413 --> 01:18:41,482
[BLAM! BLAM!]
1312
01:18:44,965 --> 01:18:46,344
CASSANDRA!
1313
01:18:47,068 --> 01:18:48,137
Are you alright ma'am?
1314
01:18:49,137 --> 01:18:51,034
What the fuck was that thing?!
1315
01:18:51,034 --> 01:18:53,655
That was a KILLER SHREW!
1316
01:18:54,137 --> 01:18:54,724
A what??
1317
01:18:55,310 --> 01:18:56,655
A KILLER SHREW!
1318
01:18:58,034 --> 01:19:00,103
You're saying that THAT
was a KILLER SHREW?! [derp]
1319
01:19:00,103 --> 01:19:01,655
Yea! A KILLER SHREW!
1320
01:19:01,655 --> 01:19:02,448
[dundundunnn]
1321
01:19:02,448 --> 01:19:04,724
[jets roar overhead]
1322
01:19:04,724 --> 01:19:07,310
What the Hell was that??!
1323
01:19:07,310 --> 01:19:10,517
Those are the jets! They're
about to drop the nuke!
We gotta get outta here!
This town's been evacuated!
1324
01:19:14,000 --> 01:19:16,034
[yelling] I said get outta here!
1325
01:19:16,793 --> 01:19:19,241
[missile roaring]
1326
01:19:22,068 --> 01:19:25,689
[menacing theme]
1327
01:19:28,965 --> 01:19:29,448
Ah!
1328
01:19:37,827 --> 01:19:38,689
[breathing]
1329
01:19:40,827 --> 01:19:43,862
[drum beats]
1330
01:19:43,862 --> 01:19:48,482
Hey shrew! You wanna dance?
You wanna tango? Come on baby!
1331
01:19:48,965 --> 01:19:49,344
[clank]
1332
01:19:51,724 --> 01:19:52,206
[roar]
1333
01:19:52,689 --> 01:19:53,379
DERP!!!
1334
01:19:53,379 --> 01:19:54,000
[SPLAT!]
1335
01:19:54,758 --> 01:19:57,379
[missile roaring]
1336
01:19:58,241 --> 01:19:59,103
[menacing music intensifies]
1337
01:20:01,275 --> 01:20:02,137
[whimpering]
1338
01:20:02,758 --> 01:20:03,344
Cassandra!
1339
01:20:04,931 --> 01:20:05,827
Lewis!
1340
01:20:08,620 --> 01:20:09,413
[growling]
1341
01:20:10,000 --> 01:20:10,931
AHHHHHHHHH!!!
1342
01:20:11,655 --> 01:20:13,965
[screaming, roaring]
1343
01:20:15,448 --> 01:20:16,724
Cassandra noooo!
1344
01:20:17,448 --> 01:20:22,413
[chomping, screaming]
1345
01:20:24,137 --> 01:20:25,413
Oh my God, no!!!
1346
01:20:25,413 --> 01:20:26,206
C'mon Lewis, we gotta
get out of here!
1347
01:20:26,206 --> 01:20:27,137
Leave me alone!
1348
01:20:27,137 --> 01:20:28,068
C'mon we gotta get outta here!
1349
01:20:28,068 --> 01:20:29,000
We were gonna get married!
1350
01:20:29,000 --> 01:20:30,000
You WERE gonna get married!
1351
01:20:30,620 --> 01:20:31,862
Oh Cassandra no!
1352
01:20:31,862 --> 01:20:33,517
Lewis come on we've gotta go!
1353
01:20:33,517 --> 01:20:34,551
Leave me alone!
1354
01:20:34,551 --> 01:20:36,448
They're gonna drop the nuke!
1355
01:20:37,034 --> 01:20:38,344
[roaring]
[squish]
1356
01:20:39,586 --> 01:20:43,586
AHHHHH! Get back! Get
back! AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
1357
01:20:45,206 --> 01:20:46,931
[roar, CHOMP!]
1358
01:20:47,448 --> 01:20:49,034
[chomp!]
1359
01:20:49,827 --> 01:20:50,931
[action music picks up]
1360
01:20:51,758 --> 01:20:52,310
Help me!
1361
01:20:54,310 --> 01:20:55,586
Are you alright?
1362
01:20:55,586 --> 01:20:57,241
Yes! Where's Lewis?
Where's Cassandra?
1363
01:20:57,241 --> 01:21:00,103
They're dead!
Everybody's fuckin' dead!
1364
01:21:00,758 --> 01:21:01,413
[evil giggling]
1365
01:21:02,137 --> 01:21:02,689
Is that Murdock??
1366
01:21:03,551 --> 01:21:04,482
Say hello to your grandpa!
1367
01:21:04,965 --> 01:21:05,137
[BLAM!]
1368
01:21:06,206 --> 01:21:06,931
[squeak!]
1369
01:21:08,965 --> 01:21:13,620
Blake! Before we die, there's
something I need to tell you...
1370
01:21:13,620 --> 01:21:15,413
Hold that thought,
there's Wayne!
1371
01:21:15,413 --> 01:21:16,620
Wayne, I knew you was alive!
1372
01:21:16,620 --> 01:21:18,620
You won't believe what
I've been through!
1373
01:21:18,620 --> 01:21:20,724
Oh, I know what you've
been through but we gotta
stop that thing, look!
1374
01:21:21,448 --> 01:21:22,379
I've got a better idea!
1375
01:21:23,000 --> 01:21:23,103
[throttle]
1376
01:21:29,275 --> 01:21:31,034
It's coming! It's coming!
1377
01:21:34,862 --> 01:21:36,620
I told you he was blinkin'!
1378
01:21:38,793 --> 01:21:39,931
[action score builds]
1379
01:21:41,689 --> 01:21:42,965
[missile roaring]
1380
01:21:49,344 --> 01:21:52,724
I got ya! Come on! I'ma getcha!
1381
01:21:53,448 --> 01:21:54,137
[whoosh!]
1382
01:21:54,931 --> 01:21:56,724
[heroic theme plays]
1383
01:22:00,172 --> 01:22:04,551
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Yeaaah!!!!
1384
01:22:05,137 --> 01:22:06,310
[nuke explosion]
1385
01:22:06,931 --> 01:22:08,827
[rumbling]
1386
01:22:09,689 --> 01:22:12,517
I can't see! I can't see!
1387
01:22:12,517 --> 01:22:16,931
I looked right into it,
they said ya can't look into
it! I looked right into it!
1388
01:22:17,517 --> 01:22:17,758
Oh my God!
1389
01:22:18,896 --> 01:22:20,310
This was a gift
from Giorgio Armani!
1390
01:22:22,310 --> 01:22:25,586
Where's my hat? Where the
Hell's my... there's my hat!
Where the Hell is Wayne??
1391
01:22:27,241 --> 01:22:28,344
Wayne!!
1392
01:22:29,206 --> 01:22:31,758
Wayne! Where are you?! Wayne!!!
1393
01:22:36,034 --> 01:22:38,620
[DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!!!]
1394
01:22:40,620 --> 01:22:42,344
[DUNNNNNNNN!!!]
1395
01:22:45,310 --> 01:22:49,758
[theme] It was a dark and
stormy night! The professor was
feeling good! Lewis is about...
to release the professor's
book! Fiona's on the way!
1396
01:22:54,103 --> 01:22:59,103
[theme] The scientist is in
the lab! Then it all went
bad! Shrews are on the loose!
1397
01:23:01,586 --> 01:23:04,275
[theme] Fiona's car breaks!
Sheriff's on the way!
Cassandra's so hot! Everybody
wants her! The shrews do too!!!
1398
01:23:09,000 --> 01:23:14,000
[theme] Doctor Murdock warns
everybody! Sheriff calls for
backup, which is his cousin!
1399
01:23:16,448 --> 01:23:21,137
[theme] Lewis searches for
the safe in the house! The
shrews are coming and they're
gonna kill everybody!!!
1400
01:23:24,137 --> 01:23:28,586
[theme] Killer Shrews! Ya
Shrews, Ya Lose! Whatcha
gonna do when they come for
you? They're big and ugly!
They've got a taste for blood!
1401
01:23:33,965 --> 01:23:38,965
[theme] Save yourself! Vicious
man-eating shrews! Killer
Shrews! Ya Shrews, Ya Lose!
Whatcha gonna do when they come
for you? They're big and ugly,
they've got a taste for blood!
1402
01:23:48,586 --> 01:23:53,586
[theme] Save yourself! Vicious
man-eating shrews! It starts
to get reeeeaaaaaaal!!!!
1403
01:23:56,655 --> 01:23:59,586
[theme] A shrew is humping
Lewis! The professor gets his
shotgun, and blows the shrew
away! Backup arrives, Wild
Wayne, which is his cousin!
1404
01:24:05,827 --> 01:24:10,827
[theme] They leave with Fiona on
the way to town! They flip over
the car! Shrews are everywhere!
1405
01:24:14,551 --> 01:24:19,551
[theme] Captain Jack
Frost bitch lock down the
town! Lock it down! He's
yelling "hold the line!"
1406
01:24:22,068 --> 01:24:25,137
[theme] Shrews are taking over!
Killing everybody! Time to drop
the nuke! Wayne shows up outta
nowhere on his motorcycle!
1407
01:24:30,724 --> 01:24:35,724
[theme] He grabs the nuke
[what?!] right in his hands
[what!!?!?] he's a crazy ass
man everything is going ham!!!
1408
01:24:38,724 --> 01:24:42,931
[theme] Killer Shrews! Ya
Shrews, Ya Lose! Whatcha
gonna do when they come for
you? They're big and ugly!
They've got a taste for blood!
1409
01:24:48,551 --> 01:24:53,551
[theme] Save yourself!
Vicious man-eating shrews!
Killer Shrews! Ya Shrews,
Ya Lose! Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you?!
1410
01:25:00,448 --> 01:25:04,724
[theme] They're big! And ugly!
They've got a taste for blood!
Save yourself! Save yourself!
1411
01:25:06,172 --> 01:25:09,724
[theme] Vicious man-eating
shrews! Run run ruuuun!!!
1412
01:25:14,482 --> 01:25:17,758
[theme] Shreeeeeeeeeews!
1413
01:25:19,310 --> 01:25:19,827
Yeah!
1414
01:25:20,413 --> 01:25:21,655
[clapping]
1415
01:25:21,655 --> 01:25:24,241
That was shrewtastic!
Yeah I love this movie-
1416
01:25:24,241 --> 01:25:26,896
Hey whattya doin' ya old Mel
Brooks looking' sonofabitch?!!
1417
01:25:26,896 --> 01:25:28,137
Hey hey hey! I'm
watching the movie-
1418
01:25:28,137 --> 01:25:29,241
Get outta my house! This
ain't the country club!
1419
01:25:29,241 --> 01:25:30,827
Wait!
Just get out!!!
1420
01:25:30,827 --> 01:25:31,758
Hey wait a minute! I-
1421
01:25:31,758 --> 01:25:32,724
AHHHHHH!
93275