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Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
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NARRATOR: Many moons ago on
the distant planet of Gigax,
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00:00:42,484 --> 00:00:45,520
a nameless evil
reigned supreme.
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00:00:45,554 --> 00:00:48,925
This ruthless being
had amassed power beyond measure
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00:00:48,958 --> 00:00:51,693
and was preparing to strike down
all that was good
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00:00:51,726 --> 00:00:54,096
and just in the universe.
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00:00:54,130 --> 00:00:56,933
Before he could fulfill
his dark destiny,
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00:00:56,966 --> 00:01:00,402
the forces of light
banded together,
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00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:02,671
and in their most desperate hour
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00:01:02,704 --> 00:01:04,773
toppled the dark one
from his throne.
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00:01:04,807 --> 00:01:08,476
He was imprisoned in a place
far beyond reach,
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00:01:08,510 --> 00:01:10,813
for if he were ever
to be released,
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00:01:10,847 --> 00:01:15,717
it would spell certain doom
for all existence.
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00:01:22,158 --> 00:01:26,095
Okay, here's the deal, men.
Winner is champion of
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00:01:26,128 --> 00:01:29,131
the universe,
loser gets buried alive.
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00:01:29,165 --> 00:01:31,399
Got it?
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00:01:31,433 --> 00:01:32,701
That's fair.
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00:01:32,734 --> 00:01:34,837
- Ready?
- Set?
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00:01:34,871 --> 00:01:36,538
- Crazy Ball!
- Crazy Ball!
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00:01:36,571 --> 00:01:40,810
[HARD ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
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00:01:40,843 --> 00:01:42,778
You're toast, Mimi.
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00:01:42,812 --> 00:01:45,848
Not even close, you dork!
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00:01:47,682 --> 00:01:48,918
Ow, my butt!
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00:01:48,951 --> 00:01:51,519
Yes, five point butt bonus.
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00:01:51,553 --> 00:01:53,189
Swing ball.
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00:01:53,222 --> 00:01:54,522
One...
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00:01:54,556 --> 00:01:55,657
- [MUSIC STOPS]
- Crazy ball.
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00:01:55,690 --> 00:01:57,193
- Two...
- Crazy ball.
29
00:01:57,226 --> 00:01:59,661
- Three.
- Three of a kind!
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00:01:59,694 --> 00:02:02,198
Four, alright,
four points for me.
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00:02:02,231 --> 00:02:04,466
I'll get you at
the switcheroo, crumb scum.
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00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:06,135
Just you watch.
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00:02:06,168 --> 00:02:08,770
Buckle up for a dirt sandwich,
you little maniac.
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00:02:08,804 --> 00:02:10,206
Aaaah!
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00:02:10,239 --> 00:02:13,441
[HARD ROCK MUSIC RESUMES]
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00:02:18,713 --> 00:02:22,184
Switcheroo. Aaah!
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00:02:22,218 --> 00:02:23,718
I win!
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00:02:23,752 --> 00:02:26,554
Start digging, Luke.
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00:02:30,793 --> 00:02:32,627
Damn switcheroo.
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00:02:32,661 --> 00:02:34,931
Keep digging, boy.
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00:02:34,964 --> 00:02:39,101
Hey, hurry up so I can bury you
and go to sleep already.
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00:02:39,135 --> 00:02:41,536
I'm gonna bring your bed
into my room
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00:02:41,569 --> 00:02:44,673
and make one of those,
oh, what do you call it.
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00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:46,809
Oh, super beds.
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00:02:46,842 --> 00:02:50,612
Oh, yeah, that's cool.
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00:02:50,645 --> 00:02:52,815
[THUDS]
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00:03:02,191 --> 00:03:04,659
Is that a coffin?
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00:03:04,693 --> 00:03:06,594
Is this where
they buried Grandma?
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00:03:06,628 --> 00:03:08,730
No, I don't think so.
50
00:03:08,898 --> 00:03:11,666
Let me see.
51
00:03:16,238 --> 00:03:18,506
It's really stuck in there good.
52
00:03:19,708 --> 00:03:21,676
Maybe if I press those,
it'll do something?
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00:03:21,710 --> 00:03:26,648
No, I'm the Crazy Ball champion
so I get all the treasures.
54
00:03:26,681 --> 00:03:28,918
Right, of course.
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00:03:28,951 --> 00:03:30,719
Let's see.
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00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:32,922
Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.
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00:03:32,955 --> 00:03:35,257
Dumb dumb chump, here we go.
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00:03:35,291 --> 00:03:37,525
[CLICKING]
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00:03:37,559 --> 00:03:40,196
Wow, first try.
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00:03:40,229 --> 00:03:41,696
Come to mama.
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00:03:41,730 --> 00:03:44,900
[CLICKS]
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00:03:46,202 --> 00:03:49,571
[RUMBLING]
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00:03:55,710 --> 00:03:57,279
Cover it up!
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00:03:57,313 --> 00:04:00,116
Hurry, before mom and dad see.
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00:04:00,149 --> 00:04:01,716
Shovel faster, numnuts.
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00:04:01,750 --> 00:04:04,253
I'm trying.
67
00:04:13,863 --> 00:04:17,166
Luke, Mimi, do you kids
know what time it is?
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00:04:17,199 --> 00:04:18,334
- 9:00.
- 9:00.
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00:04:18,367 --> 00:04:21,337
What happens at 9:00.
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00:04:21,370 --> 00:04:24,140
Get inside.
It's time for bed.
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00:04:35,818 --> 00:04:38,686
Dad?
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00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:40,222
You okay, sport?
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00:04:40,256 --> 00:04:42,858
Is there such thing
as monsters?
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00:04:45,861 --> 00:04:47,897
Well, here's the thing, Luke.
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00:04:47,930 --> 00:04:51,133
In a lot of ways,
humans are the real monsters.
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00:04:51,167 --> 00:04:52,802
So I'd say yes.
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00:04:52,835 --> 00:04:56,671
Okay, what your genius father
is trying to say is no,
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00:04:56,704 --> 00:04:59,141
there's no such thing
as monsters.
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00:04:59,175 --> 00:05:01,609
What happened to your head?
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00:05:03,946 --> 00:05:05,881
Somebody lost at Crazy Ball.
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00:05:05,915 --> 00:05:07,615
Again?
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00:05:07,649 --> 00:05:09,385
Mimi, I don't want to keep
going through this, okay?
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00:05:09,418 --> 00:05:12,188
Remember what we said last time
you were playing kookie ball?
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00:05:12,221 --> 00:05:14,290
It's Crazy Ball!
85
00:05:14,323 --> 00:05:16,826
Plus, it's not even my fault.
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00:05:16,859 --> 00:05:19,727
Check the tapes. Luke sucks.
87
00:05:19,761 --> 00:05:21,230
It doesn't matter, okay?
88
00:05:21,263 --> 00:05:22,832
You need to take it easy
on your brother.
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00:05:22,865 --> 00:05:24,300
He won't want to play
with you anymore.
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00:05:24,333 --> 00:05:25,868
What's the deal
with monsters?
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00:05:25,901 --> 00:05:29,371
Are they fake? Are they real?
All the above?
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00:05:29,405 --> 00:05:32,241
Yeah, what's with all
the monster talk tonight?
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00:05:32,274 --> 00:05:34,777
It's just that, if there
are monsters coming to kill us,
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00:05:34,810 --> 00:05:37,712
could you make sure they...
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00:05:37,745 --> 00:05:39,849
could you make sure
they kill Luke first?
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00:05:39,882 --> 00:05:43,319
That's harsh.
But okay.
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00:05:43,352 --> 00:05:45,955
Mimi, that's
a horrible thing to say.
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00:05:45,988 --> 00:05:48,324
Why?!
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00:05:48,357 --> 00:05:50,159
Dismissed.
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00:05:50,192 --> 00:05:52,694
Good night, wacko.
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00:05:52,727 --> 00:05:56,232
MIMI: [GASPS] Dad!
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00:05:59,969 --> 00:06:02,805
Good night.
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00:06:16,318 --> 00:06:18,287
[KNOCKING]
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00:07:06,335 --> 00:07:09,939
[CHAINS RATTLING]
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00:07:13,876 --> 00:07:16,946
Look at this shit!
There's not a pawn shop in town
106
00:07:16,979 --> 00:07:19,848
that's going to want this crap!
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00:07:19,882 --> 00:07:22,384
If it's all garbage,
why did that old guy put up
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00:07:22,418 --> 00:07:24,386
such a fight when we busted in?
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00:07:24,420 --> 00:07:27,856
I think I sprained my wrist
clocking that geezer.
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00:07:27,890 --> 00:07:32,760
Look at this. Why the hell
would you even grab this?
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00:07:32,795 --> 00:07:35,497
Suck my dick, asshole!
It was dark.
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00:07:35,531 --> 00:07:37,533
And that's a nice frame.
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00:07:37,566 --> 00:07:40,436
[CHUCKLES] Not any more.
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00:07:47,343 --> 00:07:50,212
[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
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00:07:51,847 --> 00:07:54,316
What the hell did
you say, buddy?
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00:07:58,320 --> 00:07:59,488
- [GLASS SHATTERS]
- [CHUCKLES]
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00:07:59,521 --> 00:08:02,291
A variation
of the Ironian tongue.
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00:08:02,324 --> 00:08:04,927
How primitive.
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00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:09,398
Let's just get out of here!
This guy's on something.
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00:08:09,431 --> 00:08:11,867
Hey, you dickless shit.
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00:08:11,900 --> 00:08:13,535
We already killed
one asshole tonight.
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00:08:13,569 --> 00:08:16,538
And we'll gladly do it again!
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00:08:16,572 --> 00:08:19,441
[GRUNTS]
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00:08:25,214 --> 00:08:27,983
[SCREAMING]
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00:08:29,918 --> 00:08:32,955
Your flesh is unevolved
and weak.
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00:08:32,988 --> 00:08:38,260
Perhaps in a few millennia, you
will make worthy adversaries.
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00:08:39,928 --> 00:08:42,431
But not today.
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00:08:42,464 --> 00:08:44,967
[LAUGHS]
129
00:09:02,985 --> 00:09:05,187
[GROANS]
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00:09:06,355 --> 00:09:11,427
Hey, man, please,
I don't want to die.
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00:09:11,460 --> 00:09:14,463
Then live forever.
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00:09:18,667 --> 00:09:21,203
[SCREAMS]
133
00:09:21,236 --> 00:09:24,406
- [LAUGHING]
- [SCREAMING CONTINUES]
134
00:09:34,283 --> 00:09:36,385
This is a really big hole.
135
00:09:36,418 --> 00:09:38,887
How did you even dig this?
Huh?
136
00:09:38,921 --> 00:09:43,025
Alright, first I want to say,
great job on the hole, son.
137
00:09:43,058 --> 00:09:45,194
- Thanks.
- Second I want to say,
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00:09:45,227 --> 00:09:46,528
this is completely unacceptable.
139
00:09:46,562 --> 00:09:48,230
- Oh.
- Somebody's going to
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00:09:48,263 --> 00:09:51,500
have to fill this in.
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00:09:51,533 --> 00:09:54,269
Anybody.
142
00:09:54,303 --> 00:09:56,405
One of you even.
143
00:09:56,438 --> 00:09:58,440
- I vote dad.
- Me too.
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00:09:58,474 --> 00:10:00,409
Yeah, me three.
145
00:10:00,442 --> 00:10:03,345
And if I... when I vote,
I will vote for all of
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00:10:03,379 --> 00:10:06,281
- you three, as a family.
- No, no.
147
00:10:06,315 --> 00:10:07,583
Doesn't work that way.
148
00:10:07,616 --> 00:10:11,653
Alright.
So much for democracy, huh?
149
00:10:11,687 --> 00:10:14,423
Do the dishes, Greg.
150
00:10:14,456 --> 00:10:16,024
What made these?
151
00:10:16,058 --> 00:10:18,026
If I had to guess,
I'd say some wino
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00:10:18,060 --> 00:10:19,695
was on his way home
from a bender last night.
153
00:10:19,728 --> 00:10:21,430
Thought he could Evel Knievel
154
00:10:21,463 --> 00:10:23,999
his way over this hole
and fell in.
155
00:10:24,032 --> 00:10:28,437
- What else could it be really?
- Maybe a raccoon.
156
00:10:28,470 --> 00:10:30,205
That doesn't make
any damn sense.
157
00:10:30,239 --> 00:10:34,443
Oh!
Oh, oh, my hand.
158
00:10:34,476 --> 00:10:36,311
- Are you okay?
- Oh, God, my hand.
159
00:10:36,345 --> 00:10:38,447
- Well, that didn't take long.
- Oh, it hurts so bad, Susan!
160
00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,382
- Okay, okay.
- Oh, my God.
161
00:10:40,416 --> 00:10:42,317
- Come on.
- Oh, Susan.
162
00:10:42,351 --> 00:10:46,255
Ow! Don't even look
at it, it hurts.
163
00:10:55,731 --> 00:10:58,500
Did you see the size
of those freaking claw marks?
164
00:10:58,534 --> 00:11:01,370
We need to tell
somebody what happened.
165
00:11:01,403 --> 00:11:02,638
Maybe we should
go to the police.
166
00:11:02,671 --> 00:11:05,307
I don't trust cops.
Not one bit.
167
00:11:05,340 --> 00:11:08,377
We're going to go search
ourselves tonight.
168
00:11:08,410 --> 00:11:09,711
That's crazy.
169
00:11:09,745 --> 00:11:11,647
We don't know
what was down there.
170
00:11:11,680 --> 00:11:15,417
What's crazy is what a stupid
wiener you can be some times.
171
00:11:15,451 --> 00:11:18,320
Pull up your diapers
because we're going to go find
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00:11:18,353 --> 00:11:20,622
what crawled out
of your grave last night
173
00:11:20,656 --> 00:11:24,460
like a couple of real
American heroes.
174
00:11:26,094 --> 00:11:28,530
Can you dig it?!
175
00:11:28,564 --> 00:11:31,433
Yeah. I dig it.
176
00:11:31,467 --> 00:11:35,504
- Hey, man.
- Hey, Alistair.
177
00:11:35,537 --> 00:11:37,706
You beat Rage Master 64 yet?
178
00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:40,209
Yeah, man, medium difficulty.
179
00:11:40,242 --> 00:11:41,510
- No way.
- Hey, kiddy.
180
00:11:41,543 --> 00:11:44,246
You look good in your
little outfit there.
181
00:11:44,279 --> 00:11:46,582
Why don't you give us
a spin, hunky boy?
182
00:11:46,615 --> 00:11:49,351
Um, no thanks.
183
00:11:49,384 --> 00:11:50,619
[BELL RINGS]
184
00:11:50,652 --> 00:11:51,788
Never mind.
185
00:11:51,821 --> 00:11:54,456
My math!
186
00:11:55,825 --> 00:11:57,759
Is your sister crazy?
187
00:12:10,606 --> 00:12:13,609
Mimi, look.
188
00:12:14,443 --> 00:12:16,345
MIMI: That way.
189
00:12:20,315 --> 00:12:23,352
LUKE: There's no way
this was a dirty wino bum.
190
00:12:23,385 --> 00:12:25,621
Look at how even
his footsteps are.
191
00:12:25,654 --> 00:12:29,525
MIMI: Duh. When has dad ever
been right about anything?
192
00:12:29,558 --> 00:12:32,761
LUKE: Yeah, good point.
193
00:12:39,735 --> 00:12:42,771
I'm not going in there.
194
00:12:42,805 --> 00:12:44,673
Here, take this.
195
00:12:44,706 --> 00:12:46,775
I call it the Luke killer.
196
00:12:46,809 --> 00:12:48,577
It will protect you.
197
00:12:48,610 --> 00:12:50,445
LUKE: How the hell
does this work?
198
00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:53,348
Ow! The damn thing cut me.
199
00:12:53,382 --> 00:12:54,750
MIMI: You're using it wrong.
200
00:12:54,784 --> 00:12:58,320
Don't kill her Mark.
I'm going to kill you.
201
00:12:58,353 --> 00:13:02,224
Mimi, wait. Oh, crap.
202
00:13:12,367 --> 00:13:14,636
[RATTLING]
203
00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:23,478
[THUDDING, CLANGING]
204
00:13:23,512 --> 00:13:26,415
- [GASPS]
- Stop jumping at everything!
205
00:13:26,448 --> 00:13:27,616
You're jumping, too.
206
00:13:27,649 --> 00:13:30,252
I'm jumping because
you're jumping!
207
00:13:30,285 --> 00:13:31,788
This place is dangerous.
208
00:13:31,821 --> 00:13:34,891
Didn't somebody die back
when this was a shoe factory?
209
00:13:34,924 --> 00:13:38,594
Nobody ever died
from making shoes, Luke.
210
00:13:38,627 --> 00:13:40,596
That's just crazy.
211
00:13:40,629 --> 00:13:44,733
Besides, the most dangerous
thing in here...
212
00:13:44,766 --> 00:13:47,269
is me.
213
00:13:48,570 --> 00:13:50,739
LUKE: We should get out of here.
214
00:13:50,772 --> 00:13:55,377
Hey, creep!
We know you're in here.
215
00:13:55,410 --> 00:13:58,413
Show yourself or...
216
00:13:58,447 --> 00:14:02,351
or I'll break you
into a pile of bones?
217
00:14:02,384 --> 00:14:04,686
No, that wasn't good.
218
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:08,323
This is super dumb.
219
00:14:08,357 --> 00:14:10,525
Let's go.
220
00:14:10,559 --> 00:14:12,294
[BOTH SCREAM]
221
00:14:14,429 --> 00:14:15,631
[BOTH SCREAM]
222
00:14:15,664 --> 00:14:21,570
Is that fear I smell?
How sweet.
223
00:14:24,406 --> 00:14:27,509
Oh, my God.
224
00:14:27,542 --> 00:14:31,446
Man, that's what
this one called me.
225
00:14:31,480 --> 00:14:32,648
Aah!
226
00:14:32,681 --> 00:14:35,317
Are you also man?
227
00:14:35,350 --> 00:14:37,686
You are much smaller creatures.
228
00:14:37,719 --> 00:14:39,755
No matter.
229
00:14:39,789 --> 00:14:42,491
You will suffer like the rest.
230
00:14:42,524 --> 00:14:45,560
Know that in the sweet
release of death
231
00:14:45,594 --> 00:14:47,629
you'll be spared
the sight of your planet
232
00:14:47,663 --> 00:14:51,533
being torn to pieces,
watching as everyone
233
00:14:51,566 --> 00:14:54,536
you hold dear is drowned
in a sea of their own blood.
234
00:14:54,569 --> 00:14:56,304
Shut it!
235
00:14:56,338 --> 00:14:58,473
No, I am not a man.
236
00:14:58,507 --> 00:15:00,409
I am a wo-man.
237
00:15:00,442 --> 00:15:04,713
And you're going to let go of
my stupid wiener bro right now!
238
00:15:07,917 --> 00:15:10,519
Mimi, look.
239
00:15:14,791 --> 00:15:17,392
[GROANS]
240
00:15:18,928 --> 00:15:22,364
Is this yours?
241
00:15:22,397 --> 00:15:24,801
Speak.
242
00:15:25,767 --> 00:15:27,837
The gem of Praxidice.
243
00:15:27,870 --> 00:15:29,504
This cannot be.
244
00:15:29,538 --> 00:15:32,507
Believe it, buster.
245
00:15:32,541 --> 00:15:35,644
Stop messing around
and explain, scum.
246
00:15:36,779 --> 00:15:39,414
[CLANGS]
247
00:15:43,786 --> 00:15:48,390
The Geminia One, whoever wields
it is able to command me
248
00:15:48,423 --> 00:15:50,659
for as long as it's
in their possession.
249
00:15:50,692 --> 00:15:52,494
But know this, child.
250
00:15:52,527 --> 00:15:55,297
The power you wield
will be short lived.
251
00:15:55,330 --> 00:15:59,768
Sure, sure. But first let's
test this baby out.
252
00:15:59,802 --> 00:16:01,670
Alright, Monster Mash.
253
00:16:01,703 --> 00:16:06,775
Pick up my bro and, uh,
spin him around a bunch.
254
00:16:07,476 --> 00:16:09,711
Hey, come on.
255
00:16:09,745 --> 00:16:11,646
Ah.
256
00:16:13,682 --> 00:16:14,784
It hurts.
257
00:16:14,817 --> 00:16:17,319
Alright, put the cry baby down.
258
00:16:19,822 --> 00:16:23,358
Enough! The longer we play
these childish games,
259
00:16:23,391 --> 00:16:26,628
the more horrifying
your deaths will be.
260
00:16:26,661 --> 00:16:30,565
This is but a small example
of what I am capable of.
261
00:16:30,599 --> 00:16:32,634
His eternal pain
will take his mind
262
00:16:32,667 --> 00:16:35,704
beyond the furthest
reaches of madness.
263
00:16:35,737 --> 00:16:39,809
Preserved in an endless
state of... no!
264
00:16:39,842 --> 00:16:42,845
He was my masterpiece!
265
00:16:42,879 --> 00:16:45,782
Oh, sorry man.
266
00:16:45,815 --> 00:16:48,383
Thank you.
267
00:16:48,416 --> 00:16:51,386
Do you have a name,
Monster Man?
268
00:16:51,419 --> 00:16:54,924
No name can encompass
my dark will.
269
00:16:54,957 --> 00:16:57,526
Though my enemies
will sometimes refer to me
270
00:16:57,559 --> 00:17:00,797
as the arch duke of nightmares.
271
00:17:00,830 --> 00:17:02,764
Well, that sucks.
272
00:17:02,799 --> 00:17:04,766
Never mind.
We can workshop this.
273
00:17:04,801 --> 00:17:08,503
Luke!
274
00:17:08,537 --> 00:17:10,672
- Yeah?
- I want names.
275
00:17:10,705 --> 00:17:13,075
They've got to be fresh,
they've got to be cool.
276
00:17:13,109 --> 00:17:14,643
Go.
277
00:17:14,676 --> 00:17:17,546
We can't name it.
He's going to kill us.
278
00:17:17,579 --> 00:17:20,749
Ha! You would pray
for something so simple.
279
00:17:20,783 --> 00:17:23,853
I will drink your
endless screams as I rip...
280
00:17:23,886 --> 00:17:26,923
Dinosaur-us Flex.
281
00:17:26,956 --> 00:17:29,624
That's not bad actually.
282
00:17:29,658 --> 00:17:32,594
- Rexothundrax?
- Cobrala Khan.
283
00:17:32,627 --> 00:17:34,596
Revenge X Bad Lord.
284
00:17:34,629 --> 00:17:36,531
- Heartless Creep.
- Oh, Rip Lord.
285
00:17:36,565 --> 00:17:41,369
MIMI: How about Shadow Slammer?
Or even Merman.
286
00:17:41,403 --> 00:17:42,872
LUKE: Nemesis Grim Night.
287
00:17:42,905 --> 00:17:44,807
No, too sinister.
288
00:17:44,841 --> 00:17:47,642
How about Dark Lord
of Wonderful Smooches?
289
00:17:47,676 --> 00:17:51,147
I will never accept
such a title.
290
00:17:51,180 --> 00:17:53,381
Stop running
and clap your hands,
291
00:17:53,415 --> 00:17:55,818
you know, for a while at least.
292
00:17:58,620 --> 00:18:00,823
How about Psycho Man?
293
00:18:00,857 --> 00:18:03,758
Mm, Goreman?
294
00:18:03,793 --> 00:18:06,428
That's it.
295
00:18:07,864 --> 00:18:09,598
Did I get it?
296
00:18:09,631 --> 00:18:11,733
No.
297
00:18:11,766 --> 00:18:14,871
Stop that annoying clapping!
298
00:18:14,904 --> 00:18:18,473
His name will be...
299
00:18:18,506 --> 00:18:21,443
Psycho Goreman!
300
00:18:23,445 --> 00:18:24,947
Or PG for short.
301
00:18:24,981 --> 00:18:28,416
I don't see how that's better
than Archduke of Nightmares.
302
00:18:28,450 --> 00:18:31,153
Psycho Goreman, that's great.
303
00:18:31,187 --> 00:18:34,090
It's fun, it's hip,
it's wow, and it's now.
304
00:18:34,123 --> 00:18:36,424
You're making
a terrible mistake,
305
00:18:36,458 --> 00:18:38,127
you putrid little creature.
306
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:41,663
Soon I'll get the gem back,
and when I do...
307
00:18:41,696 --> 00:18:43,900
Nice to meet you, PG.
I'm Mimi.
308
00:18:43,933 --> 00:18:45,667
And I'm Luke.
309
00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:48,570
Aaah! I wield powers
unimaginable
310
00:18:48,603 --> 00:18:49,906
to your simple minds.
311
00:18:49,939 --> 00:18:52,674
Soon you will beg me
for mercy.
312
00:18:52,707 --> 00:18:55,778
But know that you will
only receive pain.
313
00:18:55,811 --> 00:18:57,813
Knock knock?
314
00:18:57,847 --> 00:19:00,216
What?
315
00:19:00,249 --> 00:19:01,650
Knock knock?
316
00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:03,518
Have you succumbed
to madness already?
317
00:19:03,551 --> 00:19:05,221
Just say "who's there" already.
318
00:19:05,254 --> 00:19:07,756
Geez, what planet are you from?
319
00:19:07,790 --> 00:19:10,793
Gigax.
320
00:19:10,826 --> 00:19:12,494
Who's there?
321
00:19:12,527 --> 00:19:15,764
Me. Crazy Ball champion
of the universe.
322
00:19:15,798 --> 00:19:19,634
And the champion says...
323
00:19:19,668 --> 00:19:22,470
go over there,
sit down, shut up,
324
00:19:22,504 --> 00:19:23,940
and wait for us
to come back in the morning.
325
00:19:23,973 --> 00:19:25,640
You dig?
326
00:19:25,674 --> 00:19:28,210
Dig what?
327
00:19:28,244 --> 00:19:30,212
Go!
328
00:19:30,246 --> 00:19:33,748
[GROANS]
329
00:19:35,918 --> 00:19:39,188
[SIGHS]
330
00:19:39,221 --> 00:19:41,857
You will suffer in eternity
for this!
331
00:19:41,891 --> 00:19:44,193
MIMI: Yeah, yeah.
332
00:19:44,226 --> 00:19:47,595
Bye-e-e-e-e-e!
333
00:19:59,875 --> 00:20:01,877
I wonder what
it's favorite shows are.
334
00:20:01,911 --> 00:20:05,114
Do you think it likes
grilled cheeses and tacos?
335
00:20:05,147 --> 00:20:06,816
We should bring him
some welcome goodies
336
00:20:06,849 --> 00:20:08,683
before we take him out
on the town.
337
00:20:08,717 --> 00:20:10,719
What do you mean
take him out on the town?
338
00:20:10,752 --> 00:20:12,221
I got to show him off.
339
00:20:12,254 --> 00:20:13,856
I'll be the coolest kid
in school.
340
00:20:13,889 --> 00:20:16,225
He's going to kill everybody
if we take him anywhere.
341
00:20:16,258 --> 00:20:19,795
No, he won't.
Not unless I tell him to.
342
00:20:19,829 --> 00:20:22,965
Mimi, I'm pretty good at going
along with your crazy ideas.
343
00:20:22,999 --> 00:20:25,868
But we need to think
about this one.
344
00:20:25,901 --> 00:20:29,839
Fine. I should probably teach
him some cool tricks anyways.
345
00:20:29,872 --> 00:20:33,209
See what kind of slick stuff
he can do.
346
00:20:37,246 --> 00:20:41,784
Watch out, world,
it's Mimi's time to shine.
347
00:20:53,996 --> 00:20:56,165
[THUNDER RUMBLING]
348
00:21:01,837 --> 00:21:04,306
The vasiaults have analyzed
the cosmic resonance
349
00:21:04,340 --> 00:21:07,176
and confirmed our suspicions.
350
00:21:07,209 --> 00:21:09,577
The ultimate evil has awoken.
351
00:21:09,611 --> 00:21:11,781
How can this be possible?
352
00:21:11,814 --> 00:21:13,849
Who could have deciphered
the sequence
353
00:21:13,883 --> 00:21:16,919
that released
the gem of Praxidice?
354
00:21:16,952 --> 00:21:19,288
I approved
the sequence myself.
355
00:21:19,321 --> 00:21:21,623
Whoever solved it
must have intelligence
356
00:21:21,656 --> 00:21:23,926
that far surpasses our own.
357
00:21:23,959 --> 00:21:28,230
Which is a notion that I find
quite preposterous, I must say.
358
00:21:28,264 --> 00:21:29,865
[LAUGHS]
359
00:21:29,899 --> 00:21:32,935
- Preposterous?
- That's right.
360
00:21:32,968 --> 00:21:35,337
Enough!
361
00:21:35,371 --> 00:21:38,240
Our mistake was being merciful
to that demon
362
00:21:38,274 --> 00:21:41,343
instead of wiping him
from the galaxy forever.
363
00:21:41,377 --> 00:21:44,246
It is clear that the rules
of the Gigaxian unity accords
364
00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:46,182
have failed us.
365
00:21:46,215 --> 00:21:49,151
What do you suggest
we do, Templar Pandora?
366
00:21:53,889 --> 00:21:58,227
It's time to elect justice
through the Templar code.
367
00:21:58,260 --> 00:22:01,831
There will be no trial
for that abomination.
368
00:22:01,864 --> 00:22:06,634
The only verdict is for him
to die by my hand.
369
00:22:06,668 --> 00:22:09,238
He has single handedly
extinguished entire planets
370
00:22:09,271 --> 00:22:10,840
from existence.
371
00:22:10,873 --> 00:22:13,909
How do you expect to
defeat him on your own, hm?
372
00:22:13,943 --> 00:22:16,946
PANDORA: I do not fear him.
373
00:22:16,979 --> 00:22:21,917
I have faith that the gods
will watch over and protect me.
374
00:22:25,020 --> 00:22:29,158
Ooh, sounds like a load
of superstitious nonsense to me.
375
00:22:29,191 --> 00:22:30,860
[LAUGHS]
376
00:22:30,893 --> 00:22:32,361
What was that?
377
00:22:32,394 --> 00:22:34,363
- Huh?
- Huh?
378
00:22:34,396 --> 00:22:36,664
No, no, no.
I didn't say anything.
379
00:22:36,698 --> 00:22:38,968
- You don't believe me?
- I believe you, Templar.
380
00:22:39,001 --> 00:22:40,735
It's just, we're boys
having a laugh.
381
00:22:40,768 --> 00:22:42,238
And...[CHUCKLES]
382
00:22:42,271 --> 00:22:44,874
- Just a bit of...
- Just what?
383
00:22:45,975 --> 00:22:48,844
I think it's an excellent plan
so why don't we just move on?
384
00:22:48,878 --> 00:22:50,846
Lots of things
to discuss here.
385
00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:53,249
Aah!
386
00:22:53,282 --> 00:22:56,886
Do you not believe that it is
my destiny to vanquish
387
00:22:56,919 --> 00:23:00,389
this darkness from the universe?
388
00:23:00,422 --> 00:23:04,360
I... would leave...
389
00:23:06,462 --> 00:23:07,930
[PANTING]
390
00:23:07,963 --> 00:23:10,866
Never forget that it was we,
the Templars,
391
00:23:10,900 --> 00:23:14,403
that cleansed your worlds
of the dark one's scourge.
392
00:23:14,436 --> 00:23:16,972
It was the will of the gods
that saved you,
393
00:23:17,006 --> 00:23:21,743
and they can just as easily have
you all wiped from existence.
394
00:23:21,777 --> 00:23:23,979
Remember this.
395
00:23:24,013 --> 00:23:26,448
Yes, you're very kind.
396
00:23:26,482 --> 00:23:29,818
What are the creatures
of this planet?
397
00:23:29,852 --> 00:23:32,855
Humans, your holiness.
398
00:23:32,888 --> 00:23:36,792
Bring me one of these
human things.
399
00:23:40,996 --> 00:23:44,900
- Where am I?
- Come here, my dear.
400
00:23:46,936 --> 00:23:48,404
Don't be afraid.
401
00:23:48,437 --> 00:23:50,772
[SCREAMS]
402
00:23:59,982 --> 00:24:02,885
He will not escape us this time.
403
00:24:02,918 --> 00:24:09,358
The light of heaven will always
extinguish the darkness of evil.
404
00:24:21,470 --> 00:24:24,940
May the gods watch over me.
405
00:24:37,987 --> 00:24:40,422
MIMI: And the president said,
406
00:24:40,456 --> 00:24:42,524
"But, Mimi, every day's
your birthday."
407
00:24:42,558 --> 00:24:44,827
Then we started eating
the whole cake
408
00:24:44,860 --> 00:24:47,563
while they broadcasted
it to the whole world.
409
00:24:47,596 --> 00:24:49,565
And that's when I woke up.
410
00:24:49,598 --> 00:24:51,267
Which really sucked because
411
00:24:51,300 --> 00:24:54,270
I wanted to finish
that tasty cake.
412
00:24:54,303 --> 00:24:59,174
ALISTAIR: Okay, so who's this
guy you have got living
413
00:24:59,208 --> 00:25:00,876
in the old shoe factory?
414
00:25:00,909 --> 00:25:02,878
You're going to
love him, Alistair.
415
00:25:02,911 --> 00:25:07,416
He's this big scary monster
that wants to kill everybody.
416
00:25:07,449 --> 00:25:08,984
Huh?
417
00:25:09,018 --> 00:25:11,887
Hey, could one of you guys
help me with this?
418
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:13,822
No, thanks.
419
00:25:22,464 --> 00:25:25,200
Holy crud.
420
00:25:25,234 --> 00:25:27,403
I know, right?
421
00:25:27,436 --> 00:25:30,806
MIMI: PG, wake up!
422
00:25:37,613 --> 00:25:41,450
PG, wake up. I want you
to meet our friend, Alistair.
423
00:25:44,286 --> 00:25:47,489
Wait, were we supposed
to feed him?
424
00:25:49,925 --> 00:25:52,194
You alive, buddy?
425
00:25:57,032 --> 00:25:58,267
Aaah!
426
00:25:58,300 --> 00:26:00,602
Stop!
427
00:26:00,636 --> 00:26:03,906
Nice try.
428
00:26:03,939 --> 00:26:06,542
Anyways, Alistair,
this is Psycho Goreman.
429
00:26:06,575 --> 00:26:08,344
Or PG for short.
430
00:26:10,346 --> 00:26:12,014
- Hi.
- Silence!
431
00:26:12,047 --> 00:26:13,515
Okay.
432
00:26:13,549 --> 00:26:15,951
We've brought you
some reading material, PG.
433
00:26:15,984 --> 00:26:18,420
And a TV to watch.
Did you sleep okay?
434
00:26:18,454 --> 00:26:20,889
I'm sorry we didn't
bring any pornos.
435
00:26:20,923 --> 00:26:22,591
PG: Petty displays of wealth.
436
00:26:22,624 --> 00:26:25,661
How can your short life spans
allow such narcissism?
437
00:26:25,694 --> 00:26:28,030
Yeah, but look
at all the hunky boys.
438
00:26:28,063 --> 00:26:31,467
I do not care for hunky boys.
439
00:26:36,438 --> 00:26:39,908
Or do I?
440
00:26:39,942 --> 00:26:42,511
PG, can I ask you something?
441
00:26:42,544 --> 00:26:44,012
No!
442
00:26:44,046 --> 00:26:46,548
PG, I don't like that attitude.
443
00:26:46,582 --> 00:26:50,052
Be nice, please.
Luke, ask him again.
444
00:26:50,085 --> 00:26:53,555
LUKE: Can I ask you something?
445
00:26:53,589 --> 00:26:55,357
What?
446
00:26:55,391 --> 00:26:57,926
What are you?
447
00:27:00,295 --> 00:27:02,998
[GROANS]
448
00:27:08,737 --> 00:27:11,340
That is a tale bathed
in the blood
449
00:27:11,373 --> 00:27:13,642
of a million dead memories.
450
00:27:18,647 --> 00:27:24,219
I was born in a time before
time, on the planet Gigax.
451
00:27:24,253 --> 00:27:26,622
A world light years
from your own.
452
00:27:26,655 --> 00:27:29,425
My entire existence
was servitude,
453
00:27:29,458 --> 00:27:33,228
under the rule of beings that
claimed to serve a higher power
454
00:27:33,262 --> 00:27:35,330
that governed over us all.
455
00:27:35,364 --> 00:27:38,634
These entities,
known as the Templars,
456
00:27:38,667 --> 00:27:40,502
had no more divine purpose
457
00:27:40,536 --> 00:27:43,705
than the dirt I excavated
to help build their churches.
458
00:27:43,739 --> 00:27:47,309
But still they were able
to crush the people of Gigax
459
00:27:47,342 --> 00:27:49,711
beneath their gilded heels.
460
00:27:49,745 --> 00:27:52,714
The Templars preached to us
their holy scriptures,
461
00:27:52,748 --> 00:27:56,418
declaring their
rightful ownership of Gigax.
462
00:27:56,452 --> 00:27:59,455
To them, we were nothing
more than parasites
463
00:27:59,488 --> 00:28:01,690
trespassing on hallowed ground.
464
00:28:01,723 --> 00:28:04,626
[MIMI GAGS]
465
00:28:06,662 --> 00:28:08,464
That candy was weird.
466
00:28:13,368 --> 00:28:19,408
But then one day
every thing changed.
467
00:28:34,456 --> 00:28:38,327
I discovered an artifact
thought to be lost forever,
468
00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:42,331
forged by ancient
Gigaxian warlocks out of energy
469
00:28:42,364 --> 00:28:44,633
from the darkest corners
of the galaxy...
470
00:28:44,666 --> 00:28:47,436
the gem of Praxidice.
471
00:29:03,820 --> 00:29:06,722
The moment I took
the gem in my hand
472
00:29:06,755 --> 00:29:11,493
and felt its immense power,
my destiny was clear.
473
00:29:11,527 --> 00:29:14,229
I would destroy the Templars
474
00:29:14,263 --> 00:29:18,567
and anyone else
that stood against me.
475
00:29:48,463 --> 00:29:49,866
The gem bonded with me
476
00:29:49,899 --> 00:29:53,569
and gave me power
beyond all other beings.
477
00:29:53,602 --> 00:29:57,506
I was able to raise an army
led by my loyal generals,
478
00:29:57,539 --> 00:30:02,711
the Paladins of Sydion,
and take back Gigax.
479
00:30:02,744 --> 00:30:05,882
But I didn't stop there.
480
00:30:05,915 --> 00:30:08,717
It was clear that my thirst
for death would only be
481
00:30:08,750 --> 00:30:14,690
satiated if I snuffed out
all light in the universe.
482
00:30:18,393 --> 00:30:20,830
But I was overthrown
and imprisoned
483
00:30:20,863 --> 00:30:24,766
by the Templars
and their planetary alliance.
484
00:30:24,801 --> 00:30:29,638
They stole the gem
and, with it, my power.
485
00:30:49,892 --> 00:30:53,830
To this day, I do not understand
how such weak minded insects
486
00:30:53,863 --> 00:30:58,500
could defeat the greatest
power in the galaxy.
487
00:30:59,568 --> 00:31:01,403
TV's working.
488
00:31:03,505 --> 00:31:06,341
Well, that boring dumb story
made me tired.
489
00:31:06,375 --> 00:31:07,509
Let's go, guys.
490
00:31:07,542 --> 00:31:10,479
PG, your homework
is to watch more TV
491
00:31:10,512 --> 00:31:12,314
and learn how to be more fun.
492
00:31:12,347 --> 00:31:14,383
Otherwise...[SPITS]
493
00:31:14,416 --> 00:31:16,485
I will have to punish you.
494
00:31:16,518 --> 00:31:18,720
- [GROANS]
- Well, it was nice meeting you.
495
00:31:18,754 --> 00:31:22,290
It would nicer if you were dead.
496
00:31:22,324 --> 00:31:23,759
Alright, bye.
497
00:31:39,775 --> 00:31:42,344
Energy runs through this box.
498
00:31:45,414 --> 00:31:48,283
It might be enough.
499
00:31:48,316 --> 00:31:52,287
Spirits of the electroverse,
find my world and alert
500
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:56,591
the Paladins of Sydion
that their master walks again.
501
00:32:00,930 --> 00:32:03,331
The gem of Praxidice
has been taken
502
00:32:03,365 --> 00:32:05,367
by two brainless meat children.
503
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:08,537
You must attain the gem
even if it has to be pried
504
00:32:08,570 --> 00:32:10,807
from their tiny dead hands.
505
00:32:14,643 --> 00:32:16,344
ALISTAIR: Thanks for
having me to stay over
506
00:32:16,378 --> 00:32:17,713
for dinner, Mrs. Hallenbeck.
507
00:32:17,746 --> 00:32:19,314
Glad to have you, Alistair.
508
00:32:19,347 --> 00:32:21,650
Yes, very glad to have you.
509
00:32:21,683 --> 00:32:23,886
Well, I was busy filling
in that hole in the backyard,
510
00:32:23,920 --> 00:32:25,822
so unfortunately, Mr. Hallenbeck
511
00:32:25,855 --> 00:32:29,324
had the pleasure
of playing master chef tonight.
512
00:32:29,357 --> 00:32:31,359
How great is
this chicken, Alistair?
513
00:32:31,393 --> 00:32:32,627
It's my special recipe.
514
00:32:32,661 --> 00:32:35,764
It's, uh...
515
00:32:35,798 --> 00:32:37,532
It's a little tough, Dad.
516
00:32:37,566 --> 00:32:38,868
The microwave will do that.
517
00:32:38,901 --> 00:32:40,837
But it sure brings
out the flavor.
518
00:32:40,870 --> 00:32:42,805
What did you three maniacs
get up to?
519
00:32:42,839 --> 00:32:45,607
We, um... Ow!
520
00:32:45,640 --> 00:32:47,409
We were playing
guns in the forest.
521
00:32:47,442 --> 00:32:49,879
GREG: Guns?
Now that sounds like fun.
522
00:32:49,912 --> 00:32:53,348
Back when I was in the army, we
used to play guns all the time.
523
00:32:53,381 --> 00:32:55,417
Except it was called
the Iraq War.
524
00:32:55,450 --> 00:32:58,720
We played for keeps.
525
00:32:58,754 --> 00:33:00,388
Meaning I killed people.
526
00:33:00,422 --> 00:33:02,457
Okay, don't listen to GI Joker
over here.
527
00:33:02,491 --> 00:33:05,862
He's never fired
a gun in his life.
528
00:33:05,895 --> 00:33:07,596
- Anyways...
- Can me and Alistair
529
00:33:07,629 --> 00:33:09,431
play video games?
530
00:33:09,464 --> 00:33:11,834
Mm-hmm. Just put your plates
by the sink, okay, honey?
531
00:33:11,868 --> 00:33:14,703
But, Alistair,
games are for nerds.
532
00:33:14,736 --> 00:33:16,371
Wouldn't you rather go
in the driveway
533
00:33:16,404 --> 00:33:19,508
and throw basketballs
at Luke or something?
534
00:33:19,541 --> 00:33:21,610
Oh, uh, yeah, thanks.
535
00:33:21,643 --> 00:33:25,580
But I just really want
to play some vids.
536
00:33:25,614 --> 00:33:27,516
LUKE: Come on, let's go.
537
00:33:30,552 --> 00:33:33,355
Guess I'll play by myself then.
538
00:33:33,388 --> 00:33:35,323
Hey, Mimi.
539
00:33:35,357 --> 00:33:37,325
Can you come back
and finish your broccoli?
540
00:33:37,359 --> 00:33:40,762
No, I cannot, because champions
don't eat broccoli!
541
00:33:40,797 --> 00:33:44,100
Well, she finished
my delicious chicken.
542
00:33:44,133 --> 00:33:48,770
And in the end, isn't that
all that really matters?
543
00:33:48,805 --> 00:33:51,339
No, she didn't.
544
00:34:00,783 --> 00:34:03,886
ALISTAIR: And then I heard Kyle
put all his pubes in a bag
545
00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:06,655
and sold them to Mason
for five bucks.
546
00:34:06,688 --> 00:34:08,390
Isn't that crazy?
547
00:34:08,423 --> 00:34:11,093
Dude, what's he going to do
with a bag of pubes?
548
00:34:13,863 --> 00:34:16,598
What the frig are you doing?
549
00:34:16,631 --> 00:34:18,100
- But...
- Took you long enough.
550
00:34:18,134 --> 00:34:19,836
I don't have all night.
551
00:34:19,869 --> 00:34:23,139
Time is a false construct that
only exists for
552
00:34:23,172 --> 00:34:27,776
primitive beings unable to phase
into the ninth dimension.
553
00:34:27,810 --> 00:34:30,579
Also I got lost.
554
00:34:30,612 --> 00:34:34,382
Mimi, what the heck
are you doing?
555
00:34:34,416 --> 00:34:35,617
He can't be here.
556
00:34:35,650 --> 00:34:38,386
He can be wherever
I want him to be.
557
00:34:38,420 --> 00:34:39,621
Remember?
558
00:34:39,654 --> 00:34:42,091
Heads up, dumpy butt.
559
00:34:44,726 --> 00:34:46,528
Bulls eye!
560
00:34:46,561 --> 00:34:48,865
This reminds me of
an ancient torture technique
561
00:34:48,898 --> 00:34:52,935
I learned from the worms
of Janus many moons ago.
562
00:34:52,969 --> 00:34:56,138
Should I go?
563
00:34:56,172 --> 00:34:58,140
This is getting a little weird.
564
00:34:58,174 --> 00:35:01,676
Those were good people,
those worms.
565
00:35:01,710 --> 00:35:05,915
I don't care about
your stupid ancient techniques.
566
00:35:05,948 --> 00:35:09,819
Unless they can make Alistair
stop being such a freaking dork.
567
00:35:09,852 --> 00:35:14,489
I once used my dark magic
to help the warlord of Zatonia
568
00:35:14,522 --> 00:35:16,792
seduce the moon princess.
569
00:35:16,826 --> 00:35:20,830
I can do the same
for you if you wish.
570
00:35:21,898 --> 00:35:25,600
You can make him want
to chuck basketballs with me.
571
00:35:25,634 --> 00:35:29,771
Alright, I'm going to bounce.
Good night, everybody.
572
00:35:29,805 --> 00:35:31,473
Do it.
573
00:35:31,506 --> 00:35:34,542
So be it.
574
00:35:34,576 --> 00:35:37,612
Your wish is my command.
575
00:35:37,646 --> 00:35:38,848
[CHUCKLES]
576
00:35:38,881 --> 00:35:41,217
Oh, Jesus!
577
00:35:41,250 --> 00:35:45,553
Greg, what did you do
to the microwave?
578
00:35:45,587 --> 00:35:48,124
Cooked a great meal
for my family, that's what.
579
00:35:48,157 --> 00:35:49,591
You're welcome.
580
00:35:49,624 --> 00:35:52,694
It's totally wrecked.
581
00:35:52,727 --> 00:35:55,131
[WHISPERING] You're welcome.
582
00:35:58,801 --> 00:36:02,737
[SIGHS] That's great.
583
00:36:03,839 --> 00:36:05,841
Oh, my God.
584
00:36:06,508 --> 00:36:07,944
Oh, my God.
585
00:36:11,847 --> 00:36:15,217
[LAUGHING]
586
00:36:15,251 --> 00:36:18,187
LUKE: What did you do to him?
587
00:36:18,220 --> 00:36:20,790
Get away from my kids!
588
00:36:20,823 --> 00:36:22,825
[SCREAMS]
589
00:36:25,593 --> 00:36:27,930
My lucky bat!
590
00:36:27,964 --> 00:36:30,166
Come on!
591
00:36:30,199 --> 00:36:32,969
Greg, what the hell
are you doing?
592
00:36:33,002 --> 00:36:34,837
Aaah!
593
00:36:34,870 --> 00:36:38,573
You dare stand against me with
such a weak excuse for a weapon?
594
00:36:38,606 --> 00:36:40,209
No, I didn't. She did. She did.
595
00:36:40,242 --> 00:36:41,743
You asshole!
596
00:36:41,776 --> 00:36:45,680
Don't hurt my parents.
That's an order.
597
00:36:45,714 --> 00:36:51,153
Um, Mom, dad, I want you to meet
my new best pal,
598
00:36:51,187 --> 00:36:54,156
Psycho Goreman,
or PG for short.
599
00:36:54,190 --> 00:36:57,793
I don't care what his name is,
you need to call the police.
600
00:36:57,827 --> 00:36:59,295
Are you kidding me?
601
00:36:59,328 --> 00:37:01,696
What's a cop going to do
against this thing?
602
00:37:01,730 --> 00:37:03,966
- Is he going to kill us?
- No way.
603
00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:05,901
PG's a big softy.
604
00:37:05,935 --> 00:37:09,905
He wouldn't hurt anybody.
Right, buddy?
605
00:37:10,739 --> 00:37:13,976
My entire existence is built
on death and destruction.
606
00:37:14,010 --> 00:37:16,245
I will kill you both.
607
00:37:16,278 --> 00:37:18,747
MIMI: No, no, no, no.
No, you won't.
608
00:37:18,781 --> 00:37:22,918
PG's just being a goof.
He's family now. Don't worry.
609
00:37:22,952 --> 00:37:24,619
Be worried.
610
00:37:24,652 --> 00:37:26,755
When I'm free of
your daughter's control,
611
00:37:26,789 --> 00:37:28,924
I will bath in your blood.
612
00:37:28,958 --> 00:37:32,694
MIMI: Ha!
PG, you're such a whack job!
613
00:37:32,727 --> 00:37:36,832
[LAUGHS]
614
00:37:36,866 --> 00:37:39,601
I will kill you.
615
00:37:39,634 --> 00:37:42,204
I will kill you.
616
00:37:42,238 --> 00:37:45,174
I will kill you.
617
00:37:45,207 --> 00:37:48,610
[UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS]
618
00:38:06,262 --> 00:38:08,831
? I'm the heckin' best ?
619
00:38:08,864 --> 00:38:12,168
? Yeah, yeah, yeah ?
620
00:38:12,201 --> 00:38:14,303
? Freak all the rest ?
621
00:38:14,336 --> 00:38:17,239
? Yeah, yeah, yeah ?
622
00:38:17,273 --> 00:38:20,242
? Freak off ?
623
00:38:20,276 --> 00:38:22,845
? Freak off ?
624
00:38:22,878 --> 00:38:25,181
? Freak yourself ?
625
00:38:30,019 --> 00:38:31,387
? I'm the heckin' best ?
626
00:38:31,420 --> 00:38:35,291
Hey, asshole!
Nice Halloween costume!
627
00:38:35,324 --> 00:38:36,624
[SCREAMS]
628
00:38:36,658 --> 00:38:38,394
? Freak all the rest ?
629
00:38:38,427 --> 00:38:40,963
? Yeah, yeah, yeah ?
630
00:38:40,996 --> 00:38:42,865
? Freak off! ?
631
00:38:43,966 --> 00:38:47,236
? Freak you ?
632
00:38:47,269 --> 00:38:52,674
? You're not my monster,
tell me what to do ?
633
00:38:52,707 --> 00:38:55,144
? Freak yourself ?
634
00:39:05,720 --> 00:39:08,390
? I'm a heckin' mess ?
635
00:39:08,424 --> 00:39:11,260
? Yeah, yeah, yeah ?
636
00:39:11,293 --> 00:39:13,863
? Freak all the rest ?
637
00:39:13,896 --> 00:39:17,632
? Yeah, yeah, yeah ?
638
00:39:27,775 --> 00:39:29,845
[SCREAMS]
639
00:39:29,879 --> 00:39:32,714
[PANTING]
640
00:39:41,924 --> 00:39:45,227
What the fuck, man?
641
00:39:45,261 --> 00:39:47,796
MIMI: So tomorrow
we've got a tight schedule.
642
00:39:47,830 --> 00:39:50,466
We're bowling at 10:00,
and then a light picnic brunch,
643
00:39:50,499 --> 00:39:52,168
which we'll have to have
around noon
644
00:39:52,201 --> 00:39:54,303
so that Mom can take us
to the grocery store.
645
00:39:54,336 --> 00:39:56,438
I've set aside
four hours for baking
646
00:39:56,472 --> 00:40:01,443
so hopefully that's enough time
to bake all 12 cakes.
647
00:40:02,845 --> 00:40:05,747
[ROARS]
648
00:40:14,756 --> 00:40:16,158
Wow.
649
00:40:16,892 --> 00:40:19,328
I wish my face could do that.
650
00:40:19,361 --> 00:40:21,163
What do you eat
back at home, PG?
651
00:40:21,197 --> 00:40:24,934
Food is not only for
sustenance back on Gigax.
652
00:40:24,967 --> 00:40:27,002
It's part of an honor code.
653
00:40:27,036 --> 00:40:31,941
To be eaten is considered
a warriors death.
654
00:40:31,974 --> 00:40:37,246
I remember during the battle
on the Bridge of Souls.
655
00:40:37,780 --> 00:40:40,916
MIMI: I've got it.
Here's the new plan.
656
00:40:40,950 --> 00:40:43,319
Six hours for baking,
657
00:40:43,352 --> 00:40:47,356
and we push upside down karaoke
to Sunday.
658
00:40:47,389 --> 00:40:48,924
Boom!
659
00:40:48,958 --> 00:40:51,794
Does that...
Of course it does.
660
00:40:51,827 --> 00:40:56,398
Case closed. Judge Mimi will
return after these messages.
661
00:40:59,335 --> 00:41:01,470
Don't mind if I do.
662
00:41:01,503 --> 00:41:03,806
I was going to eat those.
663
00:41:03,839 --> 00:41:06,208
[SIGHS]
664
00:41:06,242 --> 00:41:08,177
I think you've
had enough, fatso.
665
00:41:08,210 --> 00:41:10,546
Champion's got to eat.
666
00:41:10,579 --> 00:41:12,915
So good.
667
00:41:52,855 --> 00:41:55,591
[GROWLING]
668
00:41:55,624 --> 00:41:57,493
[SCREAMS]
669
00:42:03,632 --> 00:42:06,335
[GROWLING]
670
00:42:07,336 --> 00:42:11,206
Hello, boy.
671
00:42:11,240 --> 00:42:12,908
What is happening right now?
672
00:42:12,941 --> 00:42:14,910
You have crossed
the dream barrier
673
00:42:14,943 --> 00:42:17,946
and are traversing
the nightmare realm.
674
00:42:17,980 --> 00:42:23,018
It is here where I am able to
communicate with your privately.
675
00:42:23,052 --> 00:42:26,522
Hidden in your dark thoughts.
676
00:42:26,555 --> 00:42:29,024
What do you want?
677
00:42:29,058 --> 00:42:31,927
You know what I want.
678
00:42:34,063 --> 00:42:35,364
The gem.
679
00:42:35,397 --> 00:42:38,567
This sick game
must come to an end.
680
00:42:38,600 --> 00:42:41,603
Get it for me
so that I can be free.
681
00:42:41,637 --> 00:42:43,505
I can't do that.
682
00:42:43,539 --> 00:42:45,474
Mimi found the gem.
683
00:42:45,507 --> 00:42:47,409
It belongs to her now.
684
00:42:47,443 --> 00:42:49,978
Finders keepers, that's the law.
685
00:42:50,012 --> 00:42:53,282
How long before others
learn of my awakening
686
00:42:53,315 --> 00:42:56,652
and invade this quiet
little planet of yours?
687
00:42:56,685 --> 00:43:00,656
Sooner or later,
the gem will be mine.
688
00:43:00,689 --> 00:43:06,195
Help me now, and I might
consider sparing your life.
689
00:43:06,695 --> 00:43:08,430
I can't betray
my sister like that.
690
00:43:08,464 --> 00:43:13,268
Do you think she would
grant you the same courtesy?
691
00:43:13,302 --> 00:43:14,303
No.
692
00:43:14,336 --> 00:43:17,339
I see the way she treats you.
693
00:43:17,373 --> 00:43:20,576
These small torments
are just the beginning.
694
00:43:20,609 --> 00:43:25,447
How long before
she puts her life before yours?
695
00:43:25,481 --> 00:43:29,918
She would never do that.
696
00:43:29,952 --> 00:43:32,921
I think.
697
00:43:32,955 --> 00:43:36,358
You know this is the only way.
698
00:43:36,392 --> 00:43:41,397
Give me the gem so we can
both be free of her madness.
699
00:43:42,598 --> 00:43:46,301
I'm sorry, but I don't think
I can do it.
700
00:43:46,335 --> 00:43:48,370
It will lead to bad things
if I help you.
701
00:43:48,404 --> 00:43:50,506
Fine!
702
00:43:52,374 --> 00:43:55,344
You are stronger than I thought.
703
00:43:55,377 --> 00:43:58,714
But also incredibly stupid.
704
00:43:58,747 --> 00:44:03,252
So... what happens now?
705
00:44:03,285 --> 00:44:06,688
We wait for this dream
of yours to conclude.
706
00:44:12,094 --> 00:44:13,629
Okay.
707
00:44:20,269 --> 00:44:25,474
Alright, cats, what I'm about to
teach you today is confidential.
708
00:44:25,507 --> 00:44:30,245
The government can not,
under any circumstances,
709
00:44:30,279 --> 00:44:32,281
find out about this game.
710
00:44:32,314 --> 00:44:34,316
Got it?
711
00:44:34,349 --> 00:44:36,251
Okay, so there's two teams.
712
00:44:36,285 --> 00:44:38,287
Each team starts by throwing
their balls as far away...
713
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:40,422
So you got to run and get
the other teams balls in...
714
00:44:40,456 --> 00:44:42,691
Chuck them at your opponents,
the other player throws their
715
00:44:42,724 --> 00:44:45,060
- ball as high as they can...
- And then spin around like this.
716
00:44:45,093 --> 00:44:46,528
Each Jumping Jack
gives you a point.
717
00:44:46,562 --> 00:44:48,297
Then whoever gets hit
has to take the ball.
718
00:44:48,330 --> 00:44:50,265
But only while the opposing
player is doing...
719
00:44:50,299 --> 00:44:53,368
LUKE: But there is a special
move called the switcheroo.
720
00:44:53,402 --> 00:44:56,472
Which happens when
two balls collide in mid air.
721
00:44:56,505 --> 00:44:59,608
And when that happens, whoever
punches their opponent first
722
00:44:59,641 --> 00:45:04,279
gets all of the other
team's points plus one.
723
00:45:04,313 --> 00:45:08,016
Okay, the game ends
when you reach 67 points.
724
00:45:10,719 --> 00:45:14,256
I have no idea what's going on.
Do you?
725
00:45:14,289 --> 00:45:17,259
[SIREN WAILING]
726
00:45:22,631 --> 00:45:24,233
MIMI: Oh, no.
727
00:45:24,266 --> 00:45:26,301
Get away from the kids!
728
00:45:26,335 --> 00:45:27,503
Right now!
729
00:45:27,536 --> 00:45:29,371
What the hell is that thing?
730
00:45:29,404 --> 00:45:33,642
- Just remember your training.
- There's no time. Shoot him!
731
00:45:39,348 --> 00:45:41,750
I should have let those hit you.
732
00:45:44,353 --> 00:45:47,389
MIMI: Hurry up, PG.
We don't have all day.
733
00:45:50,359 --> 00:45:54,229
You are protectors
of this realm?
734
00:45:54,263 --> 00:45:57,633
I was expecting something
a bit more impressive.
735
00:45:57,666 --> 00:45:59,836
Who are you?
736
00:45:59,869 --> 00:46:02,271
Who am I?
737
00:46:02,304 --> 00:46:05,474
Let me show you, law dealer.
738
00:46:16,485 --> 00:46:18,821
[PG LAUGHS]
739
00:46:18,855 --> 00:46:21,723
Ahh.
740
00:46:21,757 --> 00:46:25,227
I am your master now.
741
00:46:25,260 --> 00:46:27,629
[GROANS]
742
00:46:29,765 --> 00:46:32,601
Tell your people
darkness has fallen.
743
00:46:32,634 --> 00:46:35,337
Resist the eclipse
of my power again
744
00:46:35,370 --> 00:46:36,839
and I will not
show you the mercy
745
00:46:36,873 --> 00:46:39,608
I've shown your friend.
746
00:46:39,641 --> 00:46:42,277
Run.
747
00:46:45,848 --> 00:46:47,683
Vince, give me the key!
748
00:46:47,716 --> 00:46:50,419
[GROANS]
749
00:47:02,899 --> 00:47:07,436
Here, another contestant
for your game of nonsense.
750
00:47:09,771 --> 00:47:13,475
PG, now I have to
start all over again.
751
00:47:13,508 --> 00:47:15,377
Okay, so there's two teams.
752
00:47:15,410 --> 00:47:16,879
Each team starts by
throwing their ball
753
00:47:16,913 --> 00:47:20,549
as far away from
the other team as possible.
754
00:47:20,582 --> 00:47:22,284
Do you get it?
755
00:47:22,317 --> 00:47:24,486
[GROANS]
756
00:47:24,519 --> 00:47:26,688
See, he gets it.
757
00:47:26,722 --> 00:47:29,892
Glad one of you
monster boys understands.
758
00:47:29,926 --> 00:47:31,693
That soulless husk
is just telling you
759
00:47:31,727 --> 00:47:33,729
what you want to hear.
760
00:47:33,762 --> 00:47:36,632
Whatever, you're dumb, I get it.
761
00:47:36,665 --> 00:47:38,300
Let's play.
762
00:47:38,333 --> 00:47:39,802
[GROANS]
763
00:47:41,703 --> 00:47:44,573
Oh, I get Alistair's
done for the day.
764
00:47:44,606 --> 00:47:46,441
Bye, Alistair.
765
00:47:46,475 --> 00:47:50,813
I'll be right back, you morons.
Don't move.
766
00:47:50,847 --> 00:47:52,748
Are you okay, buddy?
767
00:47:52,782 --> 00:47:55,717
Yeah, it's just...
768
00:47:55,751 --> 00:47:57,452
What?
769
00:47:57,486 --> 00:48:01,490
Do you think
I'll ever be normal again?
770
00:48:01,523 --> 00:48:05,327
Probably not.
But who cares?
771
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:07,663
I like you just
the way you are.
772
00:48:09,331 --> 00:48:12,334
Oh, okay.
773
00:48:12,367 --> 00:48:16,672
Bye, Alistair!
You beautiful blob.
774
00:48:19,675 --> 00:48:22,511
So the "F" word works
in a lot of different ways.
775
00:48:22,544 --> 00:48:26,748
If you stub your toe, you can be
like, "Ow, my frigging toe!"
776
00:48:26,783 --> 00:48:28,818
Or if you see something
weird or crazy,
777
00:48:28,851 --> 00:48:30,820
you can be like,
"What the frig?"
778
00:48:30,853 --> 00:48:33,755
But the best one is when
you're telling someone off.
779
00:48:33,790 --> 00:48:37,726
You can be like...
you tell it to them, Luke.
780
00:48:37,759 --> 00:48:40,328
Frig off.
781
00:48:40,362 --> 00:48:42,664
Frig off.
782
00:48:43,665 --> 00:48:45,600
Use that on someone
you really hate.
783
00:48:45,634 --> 00:48:47,870
[GUNSHOT]
784
00:48:47,904 --> 00:48:50,672
[MOANS]
785
00:48:53,341 --> 00:48:57,412
What is this?
Some kind of special card?
786
00:48:57,446 --> 00:48:58,680
What is this junk?!
787
00:48:58,714 --> 00:49:00,649
I told you guys
to write me love letters
788
00:49:00,682 --> 00:49:02,919
telling me how amazing I was!
789
00:49:02,952 --> 00:49:06,321
What a waste of beautiful card.
790
00:49:06,354 --> 00:49:08,623
What is love?
791
00:49:08,657 --> 00:49:14,429
You know, have you ever felt all
warm and fuzzy about somebody?
792
00:49:14,463 --> 00:49:16,465
Like when you rip out
your enemy's spine
793
00:49:16,498 --> 00:49:18,633
and display it
to their grieving family?
794
00:49:18,667 --> 00:49:22,404
No, not... no, not exactly.
795
00:49:22,437 --> 00:49:23,840
Love is...
796
00:49:23,873 --> 00:49:27,676
Love is a happy feeling
towards somebody you care about.
797
00:49:27,709 --> 00:49:30,847
- [GROANS]
- You feel complete.
798
00:49:30,880 --> 00:49:32,547
Even if you didn't think
you were missing something
799
00:49:32,581 --> 00:49:34,382
in the first place.
800
00:49:34,416 --> 00:49:38,420
All I feel is anger and hate.
I will never be whole.
801
00:49:38,453 --> 00:49:42,424
Don't worry about it, PG.
Love is for losers anyway.
802
00:49:42,457 --> 00:49:46,495
Oh, yeah? I thought you were
so in love with Alistair.
803
00:49:46,528 --> 00:49:47,864
That doesn't count.
804
00:49:47,897 --> 00:49:50,298
We're just friends
that are going to get married
805
00:49:50,332 --> 00:49:52,501
and be together forever.
806
00:49:52,534 --> 00:49:53,903
And fight a lot,
like mom and dad do.
807
00:49:53,936 --> 00:49:56,772
PG, I don't like the way Luke's
making fun of me.
808
00:49:56,806 --> 00:49:59,474
Kill him, please.
809
00:49:59,508 --> 00:50:01,510
No, please!
810
00:50:01,543 --> 00:50:04,646
Stop!
811
00:50:04,679 --> 00:50:06,816
Just kidding!
812
00:50:08,750 --> 00:50:11,921
Your face.
You're such a scaredy cat.
813
00:50:11,954 --> 00:50:14,824
And you're just... no!
814
00:50:14,857 --> 00:50:17,592
So close.
815
00:50:17,626 --> 00:50:18,795
That's it!
816
00:50:18,828 --> 00:50:21,763
Now you get to pull the wagon.
817
00:50:26,701 --> 00:50:27,804
[GROANS]
818
00:50:27,837 --> 00:50:30,305
[GUNSHOT]
819
00:50:34,776 --> 00:50:36,813
Faster, you dog.
820
00:50:55,798 --> 00:50:58,700
Hey, buddy.
You're safe now.
821
00:51:01,703 --> 00:51:04,106
It was horrible.
822
00:51:04,140 --> 00:51:05,774
His eyes.
823
00:51:05,808 --> 00:51:08,845
It's like he was
looking into my soul.
824
00:51:08,878 --> 00:51:10,847
And Vince.
825
00:51:11,580 --> 00:51:14,116
[SOBS]
826
00:51:25,560 --> 00:51:29,397
Excuse me, human. I'm searching
for a nameless evil
827
00:51:29,431 --> 00:51:31,533
that was buried here long ago.
828
00:51:31,566 --> 00:51:34,669
He's awoken
and has most likely slaughtered
829
00:51:34,703 --> 00:51:37,505
half your people already.
830
00:51:37,539 --> 00:51:39,175
Have you seen him?
831
00:51:39,208 --> 00:51:43,779
No offense, ma'am, but that
description is a little vague.
832
00:51:43,813 --> 00:51:47,415
I've seen him!
That think that killed Vince!
833
00:51:47,449 --> 00:51:48,784
Emmett O'Brien,
didn't you listen to a thing
834
00:51:48,818 --> 00:51:51,519
that this poor man says?
835
00:51:51,553 --> 00:51:53,789
No.
836
00:51:53,823 --> 00:51:57,459
God, you're a dumb ass.
837
00:51:57,492 --> 00:52:01,864
I must find him.
Give me everything.
838
00:52:07,702 --> 00:52:10,172
[SCREAMING]
839
00:52:16,979 --> 00:52:18,446
[THUNDER RUMBLING]
840
00:52:18,480 --> 00:52:20,950
Something's coming.
841
00:52:20,983 --> 00:52:23,551
MIMI: What? You got to dump?
842
00:52:39,601 --> 00:52:43,538
Welcome back to the land
of the living, master.
843
00:52:43,571 --> 00:52:46,242
Spare me the theatrics,
Dark Scream.
844
00:52:46,275 --> 00:52:47,676
What took you so long?
845
00:52:47,709 --> 00:52:49,678
We came as soon
as we could, my lord.
846
00:52:49,711 --> 00:52:51,546
Let me be the first to say
847
00:52:51,579 --> 00:52:55,684
that we are all so very glad
to see that you're alive.
848
00:52:55,717 --> 00:53:00,488
PG, are these silly
little guys your friends?
849
00:53:00,522 --> 00:53:02,191
Why don't you introduce us?
850
00:53:02,224 --> 00:53:03,926
They don't look very friendly.
851
00:53:03,960 --> 00:53:09,832
Ah, yes, Paladins,
this is Mimi and...
852
00:53:12,667 --> 00:53:13,970
her brother.
853
00:53:14,003 --> 00:53:16,272
It's Luke.
854
00:53:16,305 --> 00:53:19,141
You should know my name by now.
855
00:53:19,175 --> 00:53:22,878
They are the humans
responsible for freeing me.
856
00:53:22,912 --> 00:53:25,881
That's right. You're welcome.
857
00:53:25,915 --> 00:53:28,951
Mimi has the Gem of Praxidice.
858
00:53:28,985 --> 00:53:32,687
Don't worry.
She doesn't know how to use it.
859
00:53:32,721 --> 00:53:35,724
You may kill them now.
860
00:53:38,828 --> 00:53:41,629
[LAUGHTER]
861
00:53:45,167 --> 00:53:47,970
You fool.
Why would we do that?
862
00:53:48,004 --> 00:53:50,306
Excuse me?
863
00:53:50,339 --> 00:53:53,275
We like things
the way they are now.
864
00:53:57,780 --> 00:53:59,748
You must be joking?
865
00:53:59,782 --> 00:54:02,151
Far from it, master.
866
00:54:02,184 --> 00:54:04,286
We are quite content
with running the fifth moon
867
00:54:04,320 --> 00:54:07,790
of Gigax ourselves,
sharing the duties equally.
868
00:54:07,823 --> 00:54:09,892
We take turns
as the appointed leader
869
00:54:09,925 --> 00:54:11,894
so everyone
gets a fair chance.
870
00:54:11,927 --> 00:54:15,231
As you can see,
it is currently my turn.
871
00:54:15,264 --> 00:54:19,567
Let me guess, you made a deal
with those righteous idiots,
872
00:54:19,601 --> 00:54:20,903
the Templars.
873
00:54:20,936 --> 00:54:22,704
In exchange for
your imprisonment,
874
00:54:22,737 --> 00:54:26,308
they agreed to spare us
any further inconveniences.
875
00:54:26,342 --> 00:54:29,812
I put my trust in the worst
the galaxy has to offer,
876
00:54:29,845 --> 00:54:32,815
and this is how you repay me?
877
00:54:32,848 --> 00:54:35,717
I should have known better.
878
00:54:35,750 --> 00:54:38,788
Except for you, Cassius 3000.
879
00:54:38,821 --> 00:54:40,688
I always knew
I couldn't trust you.
880
00:54:40,722 --> 00:54:45,194
Huh, come on.
We all knew this day was coming.
881
00:54:45,227 --> 00:54:49,231
So why don't you lay down
and die like a good little boy?
882
00:54:49,265 --> 00:54:52,234
Yeah, like a good
little boy, yeah.
883
00:54:52,268 --> 00:54:54,303
PG: You imbeciles.
884
00:54:54,336 --> 00:54:57,639
Pandora's crusade
will not stop with me.
885
00:54:57,672 --> 00:55:01,377
Her gaze will fall upon your
wretched hides soon enough.
886
00:55:01,410 --> 00:55:04,612
Your shared crown is nothing
but a symbol
887
00:55:04,646 --> 00:55:07,383
of your own incompetence.
888
00:55:07,416 --> 00:55:08,918
Then we will trade this crown
889
00:55:08,951 --> 00:55:11,854
for one made
from your shattered skull.
890
00:55:11,887 --> 00:55:13,355
Kill him!
891
00:55:13,389 --> 00:55:15,391
PG, you jerk!
892
00:55:15,424 --> 00:55:17,860
Stop right there!
893
00:55:17,893 --> 00:55:21,263
What? No!
894
00:55:21,297 --> 00:55:22,697
What are you doing?!
895
00:55:22,730 --> 00:55:25,901
You told them to kill me!
896
00:55:25,935 --> 00:55:28,804
They're going to
kill you instead.
897
00:55:28,838 --> 00:55:31,273
See how you like it.
898
00:55:48,958 --> 00:55:51,293
[LAUGHING]
899
00:55:53,028 --> 00:55:55,264
[LAUGHING CONTINUES]
900
00:55:55,297 --> 00:55:57,199
Ahh.
901
00:55:57,233 --> 00:55:59,734
How long is this
going to go on for?
902
00:55:59,767 --> 00:56:01,270
What do you mean?
903
00:56:01,303 --> 00:56:03,205
[GRUNTING]
904
00:56:03,239 --> 00:56:05,341
I mean, shouldn't
he apologize or something?
905
00:56:05,374 --> 00:56:08,377
No, it's all right. Hey, PG!
906
00:56:08,410 --> 00:56:10,246
- What?!
- Apologize.
907
00:56:10,279 --> 00:56:11,447
I'm sorry.
908
00:56:11,480 --> 00:56:13,249
Not good enough.
909
00:56:13,282 --> 00:56:15,184
Let's try this again,
but this time,
910
00:56:15,217 --> 00:56:17,887
you got to really mean it.
911
00:56:17,920 --> 00:56:20,389
A ruler never apologizes.
912
00:56:20,422 --> 00:56:22,958
It's a betrayal
of everything I stand for.
913
00:56:22,992 --> 00:56:25,760
I would die... Aah!
914
00:56:25,794 --> 00:56:27,729
Yes, scream for me.
915
00:56:27,762 --> 00:56:30,933
Fine, you don't want
to give me a real apology,
916
00:56:30,966 --> 00:56:32,801
that's your problem.
917
00:56:32,835 --> 00:56:35,471
Come on, Luke. We go.
918
00:56:35,504 --> 00:56:38,274
Wait!
919
00:56:38,307 --> 00:56:39,842
Wait.
920
00:56:39,875 --> 00:56:43,345
Yeah, do you have
something you'd like to say?
921
00:56:44,980 --> 00:56:48,384
I am truly sorry,
little creature.
922
00:56:51,954 --> 00:56:54,823
Great. Apology accepted.
923
00:56:54,857 --> 00:56:57,159
Now, was that so hard?
924
00:56:57,193 --> 00:56:59,761
Go get them, dude.
925
00:57:22,051 --> 00:57:23,385
Yes!
926
00:57:24,787 --> 00:57:26,388
Ha-ha!
927
00:57:29,792 --> 00:57:31,260
[GROANING]
928
00:57:31,293 --> 00:57:33,262
[GUNSHOTS]
929
00:57:41,036 --> 00:57:44,440
[GUNSHOT]
930
00:57:44,473 --> 00:57:46,242
Oh, my...
931
00:57:51,580 --> 00:57:53,983
[GRUNTS]
932
00:58:07,329 --> 00:58:09,798
[LAUGHS]
933
00:58:13,002 --> 00:58:14,270
[GRUNTS]
934
00:58:14,303 --> 00:58:17,239
Taste of my magic, witch master.
935
00:58:18,207 --> 00:58:19,475
[SCREAMS]
936
00:58:19,508 --> 00:58:22,444
[PG LAUGHS]
937
00:58:25,281 --> 00:58:26,882
No way, lady.
938
00:58:26,915 --> 00:58:29,184
You chose this, now live
with the consequences.
939
00:58:29,218 --> 00:58:30,286
[GRUNTS]
940
00:58:30,319 --> 00:58:32,187
[SCREAMS]
941
00:58:56,312 --> 00:58:59,315
Please spare me.
942
00:59:00,549 --> 00:59:02,484
[LAUGHS]
943
00:59:06,322 --> 00:59:08,524
[GROANS]
944
00:59:09,458 --> 00:59:12,294
PG: Look into the pool
and see the horror that dwells
945
00:59:12,328 --> 00:59:14,596
inside true darkness.
946
00:59:16,532 --> 00:59:20,336
Do you see?
That's where real darkness lies.
947
00:59:20,369 --> 00:59:22,871
Within ourselves.
948
00:59:22,905 --> 00:59:26,942
I... understand now.
949
00:59:26,975 --> 00:59:29,211
Good.
950
00:59:31,447 --> 00:59:33,515
[SCREAMS]
951
00:59:42,991 --> 00:59:46,962
Maybe in the afterlife you can
be crowned the king of fools.
952
00:59:46,995 --> 00:59:48,397
Gloat all you want.
953
00:59:48,430 --> 00:59:50,432
Soon enough the Templars
will find you.
954
00:59:50,466 --> 00:59:53,569
And throw you back
in your dark prison forever.
955
00:59:53,602 --> 00:59:57,606
Despite being a gibbering idiot,
you fought honorably.
956
00:59:57,639 --> 01:00:01,977
So I will give you
a warriors death.
957
01:00:02,010 --> 01:00:03,445
No, please.
958
01:00:03,479 --> 01:00:05,914
[ROARS]
959
01:00:17,593 --> 01:00:20,362
[RETCHING]
960
01:00:25,467 --> 01:00:29,338
The horrors you've just
witnessed cannot be unseen.
961
01:00:29,371 --> 01:00:31,440
Your young minds
will carry this
962
01:00:31,473 --> 01:00:35,043
until it consumes you
in a miserable death.
963
01:00:35,077 --> 01:00:37,946
Cool.
964
01:00:37,980 --> 01:00:39,948
Can we go home now?
965
01:00:39,982 --> 01:00:41,583
Yes.
966
01:00:41,617 --> 01:00:44,219
It's time to rest.
967
01:00:44,253 --> 01:00:46,255
[THUDS]
968
01:00:47,489 --> 01:00:50,692
PG, what's wrong?
969
01:00:50,726 --> 01:00:52,327
I'm dying.
970
01:00:52,361 --> 01:00:53,629
- What?!
- What?!
971
01:00:53,662 --> 01:00:55,364
Of course.
972
01:00:55,397 --> 01:00:57,499
They must have saved my blood
from the battle
973
01:00:57,533 --> 01:01:00,335
of the zone keepers
and cursed their blades with it.
974
01:01:00,369 --> 01:01:01,703
[GROANS]
975
01:01:01,737 --> 01:01:04,006
Clever move, Dark Scream.
[GROANS]
976
01:01:04,039 --> 01:01:06,408
LUKE: We can't move him
ourselves.
977
01:01:06,442 --> 01:01:07,576
We need to call for help.
978
01:01:07,609 --> 01:01:09,344
Great idea, dingus!
979
01:01:09,378 --> 01:01:11,246
How are we going to do that?!
980
01:01:11,280 --> 01:01:13,715
Well, I don't know, cowboy cat,
981
01:01:13,749 --> 01:01:16,985
what is the difference between
a saddle and a can of paint?
982
01:01:17,019 --> 01:01:21,323
- You're going to love this one.
- What is this? What is that?
983
01:01:21,356 --> 01:01:24,393
Oh, yeah. I bought a new TV.
984
01:01:24,426 --> 01:01:26,428
In other news, I'm going to take
a couple of weeks off work
985
01:01:26,462 --> 01:01:27,763
till my hand
can heal completely.
986
01:01:27,797 --> 01:01:29,731
So you might want to pick up
a few extra shifts
987
01:01:29,765 --> 01:01:31,500
at the pharmacy.
988
01:01:31,533 --> 01:01:34,236
You dumped me for this beauty.
989
01:01:34,269 --> 01:01:37,072
- No!
- Hey. What the frig?
990
01:01:37,105 --> 01:01:39,341
Maybe you should pull up
your pants, huh?
991
01:01:39,374 --> 01:01:41,743
Just hike them up,
pack up your precious TV,
992
01:01:41,777 --> 01:01:43,645
get your lazy ass
out of this house.
993
01:01:43,679 --> 01:01:46,215
Lazy?
994
01:01:46,248 --> 01:01:48,417
How dare you!
995
01:01:48,450 --> 01:01:50,352
You know how much
I hate that word.
996
01:01:50,385 --> 01:01:52,721
My parents used it,
my teachers used it.
997
01:01:52,754 --> 01:01:54,590
And now you?
998
01:01:54,623 --> 01:01:56,592
Shame on you, Susan.
999
01:01:56,625 --> 01:01:59,261
You're better than that.
1000
01:01:59,294 --> 01:02:01,363
You know what I hate, Greg?
1001
01:02:01,396 --> 01:02:04,766
I hate how you will find
any excuse you can
1002
01:02:04,801 --> 01:02:07,369
not to go to work,
help with the kids,
1003
01:02:07,402 --> 01:02:10,472
do anything whatsoever
around the house.
1004
01:02:10,506 --> 01:02:13,609
Oh, I don't do
a damn thing, huh?
1005
01:02:13,642 --> 01:02:16,345
Let's have it.
What do you do, huh?
1006
01:02:22,451 --> 01:02:25,254
I'm waiting.
1007
01:02:25,287 --> 01:02:27,256
Oh, you think you're frigging
better than me, huh?
1008
01:02:27,289 --> 01:02:29,291
You think you're frigging
better than me, huh?
1009
01:02:29,324 --> 01:02:31,226
Well I have a BA in English.
1010
01:02:31,260 --> 01:02:32,561
What have you done
with your life?
1011
01:02:32,594 --> 01:02:35,697
Huh? What have you done
with your life?
1012
01:02:35,731 --> 01:02:37,766
I ask you.
1013
01:02:55,450 --> 01:02:58,387
[ROARS]
1014
01:02:59,354 --> 01:03:00,489
[SCREAMS]
1015
01:03:00,522 --> 01:03:01,757
Find me!
1016
01:03:01,791 --> 01:03:04,560
Find me or you all die!
1017
01:03:04,593 --> 01:03:07,563
Aaaah!
1018
01:03:11,266 --> 01:03:12,467
Aaaah!
1019
01:03:12,501 --> 01:03:15,737
[GREG GASPS]
1020
01:03:16,638 --> 01:03:18,640
What the frig?!
1021
01:03:21,343 --> 01:03:23,512
Where am I going?
1022
01:03:24,346 --> 01:03:26,448
[ROARING]
1023
01:03:26,481 --> 01:03:29,685
The ravine near highway 11
and Ryerson Avenue!
1024
01:03:29,718 --> 01:03:31,353
Aaah!
1025
01:03:31,386 --> 01:03:33,322
[GASPS]
1026
01:03:33,355 --> 01:03:35,257
Oh! Oh!
1027
01:03:35,290 --> 01:03:36,758
[SIGHS]
1028
01:03:39,829 --> 01:03:42,331
I don't know where that is.
1029
01:03:42,364 --> 01:03:43,732
Aaaah!
1030
01:03:43,765 --> 01:03:45,367
Go south of Prescott Road
1031
01:03:45,400 --> 01:03:47,804
until you reach
the second set of lights!
1032
01:03:47,837 --> 01:03:50,439
Go!
1033
01:03:50,472 --> 01:03:51,740
- Come on!
- Hurry!
1034
01:03:51,773 --> 01:03:55,410
Over here! Go faster!
1035
01:03:55,444 --> 01:03:56,745
Right here!
1036
01:03:56,778 --> 01:03:58,815
No, no, no.
1037
01:03:59,782 --> 01:04:01,249
Aaah!
1038
01:04:01,283 --> 01:04:03,352
[GROANS]
1039
01:04:04,519 --> 01:04:06,455
I'm sorry, PG.
1040
01:04:06,488 --> 01:04:09,291
You should be.
This is all your doing.
1041
01:04:09,324 --> 01:04:12,594
Could you move over and make
room for my wagon please?
1042
01:04:19,735 --> 01:04:22,304
Thanks, bud.
1043
01:04:24,807 --> 01:04:27,376
You think I'm lazy, PG?
1044
01:05:11,788 --> 01:05:14,289
Who's mom talking to?
1045
01:05:14,322 --> 01:05:17,459
Kids, kids get out of the truck
and come inside.
1046
01:05:17,492 --> 01:05:19,327
Why? Who's the skirt?
1047
01:05:19,361 --> 01:05:20,729
She needs to talk
to your friend, okay?
1048
01:05:20,762 --> 01:05:22,832
It isn't safe out here.
1049
01:05:22,865 --> 01:05:24,733
Come, children.
1050
01:05:24,766 --> 01:05:28,770
You don't want to be
anywhere near that... thing.
1051
01:05:28,805 --> 01:05:30,772
Pandora.
1052
01:05:30,807 --> 01:05:34,776
I see you've come to cleanse
the universe of me once again.
1053
01:05:34,811 --> 01:05:37,780
Immaculate timing as always.
1054
01:05:37,814 --> 01:05:40,682
Drop the disguise and show
these humans the face
1055
01:05:40,716 --> 01:05:42,919
they will bow to once
you enslave them
1056
01:05:42,952 --> 01:05:45,520
into endless servitude.
1057
01:05:45,554 --> 01:05:46,789
Endless servitude?
1058
01:05:46,823 --> 01:05:49,758
Sounds like being
married to you, Susan.
1059
01:05:49,792 --> 01:05:51,828
Greg, shut up
and get out of the truck.
1060
01:05:51,861 --> 01:05:53,628
Kids, come inside, okay?
1061
01:05:53,662 --> 01:05:55,764
Let these two figure
their shit out.
1062
01:05:55,798 --> 01:05:58,467
Dad, don't.
1063
01:05:58,500 --> 01:06:00,469
Just do what she says, child.
1064
01:06:00,502 --> 01:06:01,570
I will not ask you again.
1065
01:06:01,603 --> 01:06:03,438
Uh, excuse me?
1066
01:06:03,472 --> 01:06:06,742
You don't talk to me like that.
1067
01:06:06,775 --> 01:06:09,377
Luke, here's my idea.
1068
01:06:09,411 --> 01:06:12,481
You go beat her up,
and we'll drive away.
1069
01:06:12,514 --> 01:06:14,516
She doesn't look that tough.
1070
01:06:14,549 --> 01:06:17,552
PG: Do not let her weak
human skin fool you.
1071
01:06:17,586 --> 01:06:20,589
She will strike you
down immediately.
1072
01:06:20,622 --> 01:06:23,692
Good to know. Thanks, PG.
Luke, beat her up.
1073
01:06:23,725 --> 01:06:25,527
LUKE: But PG just said...
1074
01:06:25,560 --> 01:06:28,764
Shut up, your wiener,
and go fight her like a hero!
1075
01:06:28,798 --> 01:06:30,900
Do it now!
1076
01:06:34,103 --> 01:06:35,604
You know what, Mimi?
1077
01:06:35,637 --> 01:06:38,373
I can't. I just can't.
1078
01:06:38,406 --> 01:06:40,642
You go beat up
that lady right now!
1079
01:06:40,675 --> 01:06:43,311
I'll bash her brains
if you don't.
1080
01:06:43,345 --> 01:06:45,747
This has gone too far.
I've had enough.
1081
01:06:45,782 --> 01:06:47,582
You can't push me
around anymore.
1082
01:06:47,616 --> 01:06:50,752
Fine!
Then you're out of the band!
1083
01:06:50,787 --> 01:06:53,388
Greg, for once
in your lazy ass life,
1084
01:06:53,421 --> 01:06:55,390
you don't actually have
to do anything, okay?
1085
01:06:55,423 --> 01:06:58,627
Just get out of the truck
and come inside.
1086
01:07:13,475 --> 01:07:15,410
How's this for lazy, Susan?
1087
01:07:15,443 --> 01:07:16,778
[ENGINE STARTS]
1088
01:07:16,813 --> 01:07:18,446
Greg.
1089
01:07:18,480 --> 01:07:20,615
Hang on, kiddo.
1090
01:07:20,649 --> 01:07:24,653
Greg, don't even
thing about it!
1091
01:07:24,686 --> 01:07:28,090
MIMI: Bye!
1092
01:07:32,962 --> 01:07:36,098
We must act fast before
he's able to regenerate.
1093
01:07:36,132 --> 01:07:38,433
This beast will consume
all the light in the universe
1094
01:07:38,466 --> 01:07:39,668
if we don't stop him.
1095
01:07:39,701 --> 01:07:42,537
SUSAN: Okay. So what do we do?
1096
01:07:42,571 --> 01:07:44,706
Follow me.
1097
01:07:47,442 --> 01:07:49,846
MIMI: Slowly, slowly.
1098
01:07:50,947 --> 01:07:54,482
Gonna wrap you up, okay, PG?
1099
01:07:54,917 --> 01:07:59,387
I feel my life slipping away.
1100
01:07:59,421 --> 01:08:01,656
Stay with me, PG.
1101
01:08:01,690 --> 01:08:03,425
I'm not going to let you go.
1102
01:08:03,458 --> 01:08:06,796
There's only one remedy
for this curse.
1103
01:08:06,829 --> 01:08:09,764
You must give me the gem.
1104
01:08:09,799 --> 01:08:11,801
What?
1105
01:08:11,834 --> 01:08:15,503
No, no, you'll kill everybody.
1106
01:08:15,537 --> 01:08:17,772
PG: It's the only way.
1107
01:08:17,807 --> 01:08:20,109
The gem is linked
to my life force.
1108
01:08:20,142 --> 01:08:25,380
Once it's in my possession,
I will regain my strength.
1109
01:08:30,219 --> 01:08:31,653
Excuse me.
1110
01:08:31,686 --> 01:08:33,722
Mr. Goreman.
1111
01:08:35,825 --> 01:08:38,493
Can I get a moment alone
with my daughter, please?
1112
01:08:41,130 --> 01:08:43,498
Thank you.
1113
01:08:55,811 --> 01:08:57,880
How you doing?
1114
01:08:57,914 --> 01:09:00,515
Dad, I'm sacred.
1115
01:09:00,548 --> 01:09:02,751
I don't know what to do.
1116
01:09:02,785 --> 01:09:05,754
First off, that's a lie.
1117
01:09:05,788 --> 01:09:07,455
I know for a fact
you've never been scared
1118
01:09:07,489 --> 01:09:09,624
of anything in your life.
1119
01:09:09,658 --> 01:09:12,795
That's true.
1120
01:09:12,828 --> 01:09:19,168
Look, I know I'm not
a good dad or a smart dad.
1121
01:09:19,201 --> 01:09:21,703
But I still have
some dad wisdom for you.
1122
01:09:23,638 --> 01:09:27,843
When I was your age, a weird guy
in a van outside my school asked
1123
01:09:27,877 --> 01:09:30,679
if I wanted to see
his baseball cards.
1124
01:09:30,712 --> 01:09:32,547
I said yes without thinking.
1125
01:09:32,580 --> 01:09:34,683
And he took me
in the back of his van
1126
01:09:34,716 --> 01:09:38,553
and showed me
his giant collection
1127
01:09:38,586 --> 01:09:42,258
of pristine baseball cards.
1128
01:09:42,291 --> 01:09:44,559
I had a lot of fun.
1129
01:09:44,592 --> 01:09:47,830
And I'm thankful I put my trust
in that creepy weirdo.
1130
01:09:49,298 --> 01:09:54,170
So I think you should trust your
weird murdering monster friend.
1131
01:09:54,203 --> 01:09:56,571
It's the grown up thing to do.
1132
01:09:58,874 --> 01:10:01,978
Thanks, Dad.
That makes a lot of sense.
1133
01:10:02,011 --> 01:10:03,879
GREG: No problem, kiddo.
1134
01:10:03,913 --> 01:10:06,215
I need a bit of a think.
1135
01:10:06,248 --> 01:10:08,784
I'll be in my office
if you need me.
1136
01:10:15,590 --> 01:10:18,260
Your partner made a very poor
choice taking the evil one
1137
01:10:18,294 --> 01:10:20,562
from us.
1138
01:10:32,674 --> 01:10:35,710
Oh, wow!
1139
01:10:35,744 --> 01:10:37,947
My mistake was
letting him live.
1140
01:10:37,980 --> 01:10:41,616
It was selfish of me
to want him to suffer forever.
1141
01:10:41,649 --> 01:10:44,820
I won't make that mistake again.
1142
01:10:44,854 --> 01:10:47,223
Drink it.
1143
01:10:47,256 --> 01:10:49,325
It's time for you
to stand beside me
1144
01:10:49,358 --> 01:10:52,694
and right the wrongs
of this universe.
1145
01:10:52,727 --> 01:10:54,596
I'll drink that.
1146
01:10:57,967 --> 01:10:59,335
[GASPS]
1147
01:10:59,368 --> 01:11:01,703
[GLASS THUDS]
1148
01:11:01,736 --> 01:11:03,571
Is it gross?
1149
01:11:03,605 --> 01:11:06,708
[GASPS]
1150
01:11:11,313 --> 01:11:13,215
The final battle has begun.
1151
01:11:13,249 --> 01:11:16,919
The fate of the universe
rests in Pandora's hands.
1152
01:11:18,220 --> 01:11:19,721
And what if she fails?
1153
01:11:19,754 --> 01:11:21,689
Then there will be
no stopping him.
1154
01:11:21,723 --> 01:11:23,926
She is our last hope.
1155
01:11:23,959 --> 01:11:28,297
Stop hogging these blugels.
They're for everyone.
1156
01:11:28,330 --> 01:11:30,166
[SLURPING]
1157
01:11:32,001 --> 01:11:35,271
Pass those blugels.
1158
01:11:52,321 --> 01:11:54,390
Hi, God.
1159
01:11:54,423 --> 01:11:57,293
Now, I know I don't do
all the goody two-shoes stuff
1160
01:11:57,326 --> 01:12:01,897
you say everybody should do,
but I can't help it.
1161
01:12:01,931 --> 01:12:04,900
And I'll do whatever
the heck I want, okay?
1162
01:12:06,435 --> 01:12:09,238
Anyways, I need your advice.
1163
01:12:09,271 --> 01:12:13,775
A huge battle between evil and
worse evil is about to go down.
1164
01:12:13,809 --> 01:12:16,812
[SIGHS] And I have a very
big decision to make.
1165
01:12:21,283 --> 01:12:23,419
What shades should I wear?
1166
01:12:23,452 --> 01:12:25,387
That's a trick question.
1167
01:12:25,421 --> 01:12:28,257
I know I'm going
to wear the zebra ones.
1168
01:12:28,290 --> 01:12:32,795
In conclusion,
why am I even talking to you?
1169
01:12:32,828 --> 01:12:37,299
There's a new God in town,
and his name is Psycho Goreman.
1170
01:12:37,333 --> 01:12:40,169
And he's coming for you, buddy.
1171
01:12:43,038 --> 01:12:45,307
[CROSS CLATTERS]
1172
01:12:47,977 --> 01:12:51,280
So this TV won't stop bleeding.
1173
01:12:51,313 --> 01:12:53,782
Okay, here's the deal, man.
1174
01:12:53,816 --> 01:12:56,852
I'll give you the gem
so you can kill that mean lady.
1175
01:12:56,886 --> 01:13:00,356
But you have to promise
that you won't kill us, okay?
1176
01:13:00,389 --> 01:13:03,392
I will not kill you,
little creature.
1177
01:13:03,425 --> 01:13:05,261
Or your family of idiots.
1178
01:13:05,294 --> 01:13:07,830
Do you mean it?
1179
01:13:07,863 --> 01:13:09,832
Yes.
1180
01:13:11,766 --> 01:13:13,735
Wait, what about telling him
not to kill everybody else
1181
01:13:13,768 --> 01:13:15,471
on the planet?
1182
01:13:15,504 --> 01:13:18,941
Oh, yeah. Oops.
1183
01:13:18,974 --> 01:13:22,311
Oops is right.
1184
01:13:22,344 --> 01:13:23,879
Oh, crud.
1185
01:13:23,913 --> 01:13:27,349
What? Where's the gem?
1186
01:13:42,031 --> 01:13:44,833
Your time is up, evil one.
1187
01:13:44,867 --> 01:13:47,002
Oh, man! Get out of here, lady!
1188
01:13:47,036 --> 01:13:49,872
Step aside, Mimi!
1189
01:13:51,507 --> 01:13:54,510
Mom?
1190
01:13:54,543 --> 01:13:56,412
Susan?
1191
01:14:01,917 --> 01:14:03,519
- Hi.
- Shut up, thief.
1192
01:14:03,552 --> 01:14:05,854
PANDORA: Just walk away, child.
1193
01:14:05,888 --> 01:14:09,959
It's time I rid the universe
of this cursed thing.
1194
01:14:09,992 --> 01:14:11,527
Give me the gem, boy.
1195
01:14:11,560 --> 01:14:14,363
No, not until my family is safe.
1196
01:14:14,396 --> 01:14:15,931
That's the deal.
1197
01:14:15,965 --> 01:14:17,933
You don't get it.
1198
01:14:17,967 --> 01:14:19,435
Do you, lady?
1199
01:14:19,468 --> 01:14:22,538
Nobody tells me what to do.
1200
01:14:22,571 --> 01:14:26,774
Not you, not her, not him.
1201
01:14:26,809 --> 01:14:28,377
Yeah.
1202
01:14:28,410 --> 01:14:31,347
Not the president. Not anybody!
1203
01:14:31,380 --> 01:14:33,415
Mimi, this is serious!
1204
01:14:33,449 --> 01:14:34,984
Stop it right now!
1205
01:14:35,017 --> 01:14:37,253
Never, ever, ever!
1206
01:14:37,286 --> 01:14:39,221
That's some good
parenting, honey.
1207
01:14:39,255 --> 01:14:41,357
I wish I could help.
1208
01:14:41,390 --> 01:14:44,860
I'm just too damn lazy.
1209
01:14:44,893 --> 01:14:47,296
You!
1210
01:14:47,329 --> 01:14:48,897
Whoa.
1211
01:14:48,931 --> 01:14:50,966
Susan.
1212
01:14:51,000 --> 01:14:52,434
Think about what
you're doing here.
1213
01:14:52,468 --> 01:14:53,469
Hey.
1214
01:14:53,502 --> 01:14:54,903
Aaaah!
1215
01:14:54,937 --> 01:14:56,472
Mimi, stop!
1216
01:14:56,505 --> 01:14:59,408
MIMI: Shut up, you fat traitor!
1217
01:15:05,614 --> 01:15:08,951
PG: Killing me won't bring back
the thousands of warriors
1218
01:15:08,984 --> 01:15:11,387
I've massacred
with my bare hands.
1219
01:15:11,420 --> 01:15:15,524
No, but ending you will light
a new dawn for my people.
1220
01:15:15,557 --> 01:15:19,461
And I shall lead the galaxy
toward a bright future,
1221
01:15:19,495 --> 01:15:23,465
built on a law
and order of the Templars.
1222
01:15:24,266 --> 01:15:29,204
Go, Pandora! I believe in you.
I've always believed in you.
1223
01:15:31,974 --> 01:15:36,045
Just couldn't stay away
from the TV, could you, Greg?
1224
01:15:36,078 --> 01:15:38,914
Susan, I would still
forgive you for this
1225
01:15:38,947 --> 01:15:41,383
if you stopped right now.
1226
01:15:42,584 --> 01:15:44,420
I'll go to therapy now
if you want,
1227
01:15:44,453 --> 01:15:47,589
if you still want to do that.
if that's what you still want.
1228
01:15:52,961 --> 01:15:54,963
[GRUNTING]
1229
01:15:55,331 --> 01:15:57,633
Come on, yes!
1230
01:15:57,666 --> 01:15:58,967
Die!
1231
01:15:59,001 --> 01:16:00,903
Please. Don't.
1232
01:16:00,936 --> 01:16:04,006
SUSAN: I've been doing
a lot of thinking, Greg.
1233
01:16:04,907 --> 01:16:07,376
[CLATTERING]
1234
01:16:09,011 --> 01:16:13,515
I think you're the cause
of all the headaches in my life.
1235
01:16:13,549 --> 01:16:14,616
[COUGHS]
1236
01:16:14,650 --> 01:16:18,520
And I think it's payback time!
1237
01:16:18,554 --> 01:16:22,024
Susan, you're choking me.
1238
01:16:22,057 --> 01:16:25,494
Give me the gem.
Don't make me use this, bro.
1239
01:16:25,527 --> 01:16:28,197
LUKE: It's just like Dad said.
1240
01:16:28,230 --> 01:16:32,267
People are the real monsters.
1241
01:16:32,301 --> 01:16:34,937
And you're one of them.
1242
01:16:42,411 --> 01:16:44,446
PG: Is it not part
of the Templar code
1243
01:16:44,480 --> 01:16:49,651
to allow a defeated foe one last
chance for battle, if requested?
1244
01:16:49,685 --> 01:16:52,988
The Templar code
says lots of things.
1245
01:16:53,021 --> 01:16:56,959
You are weak,
and we have the gem.
1246
01:16:56,992 --> 01:17:00,062
There is no way
you could defeat me in battle.
1247
01:17:00,095 --> 01:17:03,665
I do not request
hand-to-hand combat.
1248
01:17:03,699 --> 01:17:07,336
If you are truly the warrior
you claim to be,
1249
01:17:07,369 --> 01:17:10,339
you will honor this request.
1250
01:17:18,247 --> 01:17:20,416
PANDORA: Name your contest.
1251
01:17:20,449 --> 01:17:24,420
I will defeat you
no matter the circumstance.
1252
01:17:31,393 --> 01:17:33,562
Mimi!
1253
01:17:33,595 --> 01:17:35,931
Huh?
1254
01:17:38,634 --> 01:17:41,003
You will decide the contest.
1255
01:17:44,740 --> 01:17:48,610
Okay, you three
will be Team Suck.
1256
01:17:48,644 --> 01:17:51,346
You two plus me
will be Team Hero.
1257
01:17:51,380 --> 01:17:54,349
If Team Hero wins,
we get the gem.
1258
01:17:54,383 --> 01:17:58,687
And if Team Suck wins,
you can have PG.
1259
01:17:58,720 --> 01:18:00,355
Got it?
1260
01:18:00,389 --> 01:18:03,225
Could you explain
the switcheroo part again?
1261
01:18:03,258 --> 01:18:05,994
Nope.
Should have paid attention.
1262
01:18:06,028 --> 01:18:08,597
Okay, chumps, let's do this.
1263
01:18:11,600 --> 01:18:13,937
Ready...
1264
01:18:16,405 --> 01:18:18,440
Set...
1265
01:18:18,474 --> 01:18:21,477
Still love you, Susan.
1266
01:18:21,510 --> 01:18:24,513
- Crazy Ball!
- Crazy Ball!
1267
01:18:37,493 --> 01:18:39,495
Ow!
1268
01:18:45,267 --> 01:18:46,435
[SIGHS]
1269
01:18:46,468 --> 01:18:49,671
I don't understand sports.
1270
01:18:49,705 --> 01:18:51,607
No.
1271
01:18:55,377 --> 01:18:57,346
Quick!
1272
01:18:57,379 --> 01:18:58,680
Do Jumping Jacks!
1273
01:18:58,714 --> 01:19:00,616
Crazy Ball. Crazy Ball.
1274
01:19:00,649 --> 01:19:01,750
What are Jumping Jacks again?
1275
01:19:01,784 --> 01:19:03,820
Oh, for fuck's sake.
1276
01:19:03,853 --> 01:19:06,655
Where are your gods
tonight now, Pandora?
1277
01:19:09,458 --> 01:19:11,760
Aah!
1278
01:19:14,663 --> 01:19:16,632
Yeah!
1279
01:19:22,104 --> 01:19:25,340
I win butt bonus. [LAUGHS]
1280
01:19:28,377 --> 01:19:30,312
66 points.
1281
01:19:30,345 --> 01:19:32,581
One more point
and Team Suck wins.
1282
01:19:32,614 --> 01:19:34,349
Dream on, back stabber.
1283
01:19:34,383 --> 01:19:37,787
This is for the time you made me
eat my own sand castle.
1284
01:19:37,820 --> 01:19:39,621
I was helping you!
1285
01:19:39,655 --> 01:19:44,293
Now that beautiful sand castle
will be with you forever!
1286
01:19:44,326 --> 01:19:48,430
I was so sick I had to miss
a week of school.
1287
01:19:48,463 --> 01:19:50,699
You're welcome!
1288
01:19:56,705 --> 01:19:59,441
The switcheroo.
1289
01:20:00,877 --> 01:20:03,712
If they get
the switcheroo, they'll win!
1290
01:20:03,745 --> 01:20:07,249
Oh, this game is
complete nonsense.
1291
01:20:10,586 --> 01:20:14,289
Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.
1292
01:20:14,323 --> 01:20:18,393
Dumb dumb chuck, here we go!
1293
01:20:26,936 --> 01:20:29,271
Yes!
1294
01:20:29,304 --> 01:20:31,406
I win again.
1295
01:20:31,440 --> 01:20:33,241
We win!
1296
01:20:35,644 --> 01:20:38,347
Aaah!
1297
01:20:38,380 --> 01:20:41,516
How does failure taste, Pandora?
1298
01:20:43,485 --> 01:20:45,454
Now give me the gem.
1299
01:20:45,487 --> 01:20:47,756
I will humor this no longer.
1300
01:20:49,558 --> 01:20:51,627
[GROANS]
1301
01:20:51,660 --> 01:20:53,595
No way!
1302
01:20:56,431 --> 01:20:57,800
What are you doing?!
1303
01:20:57,834 --> 01:20:59,768
The beast must die!
1304
01:20:59,802 --> 01:21:01,536
Mimi, get out!
1305
01:21:01,570 --> 01:21:02,805
No!
1306
01:21:02,839 --> 01:21:04,773
I'll protect you, PG.
1307
01:21:04,807 --> 01:21:07,376
Aaah!
1308
01:21:07,409 --> 01:21:09,846
Luke, give me the gem!
1309
01:21:09,879 --> 01:21:13,482
Please throw it to me, you dork!
1310
01:21:13,515 --> 01:21:15,717
[GROANS]
1311
01:21:17,686 --> 01:21:20,489
I don't know.
1312
01:21:20,522 --> 01:21:24,493
You're always so mean to me,
and I just wish that you would
1313
01:21:24,526 --> 01:21:27,663
say you were sorry for once.
1314
01:21:28,865 --> 01:21:30,766
And I'm always there
for you when you need me,
1315
01:21:30,800 --> 01:21:33,402
but I thought we were a team.
1316
01:21:33,435 --> 01:21:36,271
And you're always beating me up
and calling me names.
1317
01:21:36,304 --> 01:21:39,842
? I'm the heckin' best ?
1318
01:21:39,876 --> 01:21:44,379
? Yeah, yeah, yeah ?
1319
01:21:44,413 --> 01:21:47,683
? Frig all the rest ?
1320
01:21:47,716 --> 01:21:50,820
? Yeah, yeah, yeah ?
1321
01:21:52,454 --> 01:21:55,892
? I'm the hecking best ?
1322
01:21:55,925 --> 01:22:00,295
? Yeah, yeah, yeah ?
1323
01:22:00,328 --> 01:22:01,798
What is this?
1324
01:22:01,831 --> 01:22:03,833
Is this love?
1325
01:22:03,866 --> 01:22:05,835
Yes, silly.
1326
01:22:05,868 --> 01:22:09,337
Sing along.
1327
01:22:09,371 --> 01:22:13,308
? Frig off ?
1328
01:22:13,341 --> 01:22:16,778
? Frig you ?
1329
01:22:16,813 --> 01:22:19,448
? You're not my boss ?
1330
01:22:19,481 --> 01:22:23,351
? You don't tell me what to do ?
1331
01:22:25,654 --> 01:22:29,391
? Frig off ?
1332
01:22:29,424 --> 01:22:31,693
? Frig you ?
1333
01:22:33,695 --> 01:22:35,832
? You're not my boss ?
1334
01:22:35,865 --> 01:22:40,268
? You don't tell me what do ?
1335
01:22:44,506 --> 01:22:46,575
Frig yourself.
1336
01:22:51,881 --> 01:22:56,318
You are not worthy of the gifts
I have bestowed upon you.
1337
01:23:01,556 --> 01:23:03,325
Susan?
1338
01:23:05,494 --> 01:23:08,663
Greg.
1339
01:23:08,697 --> 01:23:10,365
Hey.
1340
01:23:10,398 --> 01:23:14,402
Yeah, you need to take me
to the hospital, okay?
1341
01:23:14,436 --> 01:23:18,473
I can't feel my hand.
I think it might be broken.
1342
01:23:18,507 --> 01:23:19,909
Luke, can you drive?
1343
01:23:19,942 --> 01:23:25,514
- No.
- The judgment is...
1344
01:23:25,547 --> 01:23:27,682
death.
1345
01:23:27,716 --> 01:23:31,386
[GRUNTS]
1346
01:23:31,419 --> 01:23:34,824
You're toast now,
you big metal moron.
1347
01:23:45,433 --> 01:23:47,435
Even with your powers restored,
1348
01:23:47,469 --> 01:23:50,605
how can you expect
to defeat my holy blade?
1349
01:23:50,639 --> 01:23:53,708
You are defenseless
against me.
1350
01:23:53,742 --> 01:23:56,545
Then I'll make my own.
1351
01:23:59,849 --> 01:24:02,317
[GASPS]
1352
01:24:03,685 --> 01:24:05,620
[GASPS]
1353
01:24:38,988 --> 01:24:42,859
You'll not stand between me
and my holy destiny.
1354
01:24:44,827 --> 01:24:46,829
Frig off.
1355
01:25:06,715 --> 01:25:08,818
I'm not going to say it.
1356
01:25:08,851 --> 01:25:10,786
But I have something
to tell you.
1357
01:25:47,890 --> 01:25:51,493
Not my hunky boys!
1358
01:25:51,526 --> 01:25:53,930
Aaaah!
1359
01:26:03,738 --> 01:26:06,242
You have no idea
what you've done.
1360
01:26:06,275 --> 01:26:09,145
The universe
as you know it is finished.
1361
01:26:09,178 --> 01:26:10,545
[GROANS]
1362
01:26:10,578 --> 01:26:13,215
Thank you.
1363
01:26:13,249 --> 01:26:14,683
I'm proud of you guys.
1364
01:26:14,716 --> 01:26:17,552
PANDORA:
Finish me, nameless one.
1365
01:26:17,585 --> 01:26:20,555
Get this over with
so that I can be at peace.
1366
01:26:20,588 --> 01:26:22,925
There will never
be peace for you.
1367
01:26:22,959 --> 01:26:24,794
I've been to the after world,
1368
01:26:24,827 --> 01:26:29,597
and it's a place where fools
like you suffer the worst.
1369
01:26:29,631 --> 01:26:32,168
And my name is...
1370
01:26:32,201 --> 01:26:34,870
Psycho Goreman.
1371
01:26:37,706 --> 01:26:39,842
That's a beautiful name.
1372
01:26:39,875 --> 01:26:41,676
You fought with honor.
1373
01:26:41,710 --> 01:26:44,713
It's only fitting I give you
a warriors death.
1374
01:26:44,746 --> 01:26:46,949
No, not that!
1375
01:26:46,983 --> 01:26:49,185
No!
1376
01:26:49,218 --> 01:26:50,853
- Let's go.
- Oh, no.
1377
01:26:50,886 --> 01:26:52,221
What is he doing?
1378
01:26:52,254 --> 01:26:54,123
Oh, you don't want to see this.
1379
01:26:54,156 --> 01:26:56,926
[GROWLING, SCREAMING]
1380
01:27:03,299 --> 01:27:07,535
You know, I remember when this
used to be a shoe factory.
1381
01:27:17,880 --> 01:27:21,283
Delicious.
1382
01:27:21,317 --> 01:27:23,551
Well, what now?
1383
01:27:23,585 --> 01:27:26,322
Now I will do
what I was meant to do...
1384
01:27:26,355 --> 01:27:28,157
destroy everything.
1385
01:27:28,190 --> 01:27:31,293
The age of chaos begins anew.
1386
01:27:31,327 --> 01:27:35,898
Yes, and?
1387
01:27:35,931 --> 01:27:39,135
And I will spare your lives.
1388
01:27:46,909 --> 01:27:49,577
Take it.
1389
01:27:49,611 --> 01:27:50,913
Really?
1390
01:27:50,946 --> 01:27:54,817
I don't need it
anymore, little one.
1391
01:27:54,850 --> 01:27:58,686
For the first time
in centuries I feel whole.
1392
01:27:58,720 --> 01:28:01,589
Thanks to your family,
I now know that true power
1393
01:28:01,623 --> 01:28:04,193
comes from within.
1394
01:28:04,226 --> 01:28:06,862
The power of love.
1395
01:28:06,896 --> 01:28:08,630
What?
1396
01:28:08,663 --> 01:28:10,299
Goodbye, Mimi.
1397
01:28:10,332 --> 01:28:14,837
Goodbye, Greg and Susan and...
1398
01:28:14,870 --> 01:28:17,373
boy.
1399
01:28:17,406 --> 01:28:20,675
It's time for me to take
this new found power
1400
01:28:20,708 --> 01:28:24,146
and use it to destroy
the galaxy.
1401
01:28:28,417 --> 01:28:30,886
PG, wait!
1402
01:29:07,957 --> 01:29:12,394
Well, we learned a lot today.
1403
01:29:12,428 --> 01:29:14,762
About what?
1404
01:29:16,298 --> 01:29:19,201
Okay, okay, let's go
to the hospital.
1405
01:29:19,235 --> 01:29:24,206
Okay, Greg, come on.
Come. This way.
1406
01:29:24,240 --> 01:29:26,175
Whoa, okay.
1407
01:29:26,208 --> 01:29:29,345
[ENGINE STARTS]
1408
01:29:45,027 --> 01:29:47,863
Chaos has erupted in downtown
Spangler Springs
1409
01:29:47,897 --> 01:29:50,266
as police are powerless
to stop the rampage
1410
01:29:50,299 --> 01:29:53,903
of what can only be described
as a giant naked purple man.
1411
01:29:53,936 --> 01:29:56,906
Alistair, come on
it's time for dinner.
1412
01:30:48,824 --> 01:30:52,995
? Two heads, one heart ?
1413
01:30:53,028 --> 01:30:57,266
? Every reason to bite ?
1414
01:30:57,299 --> 01:31:01,804
? He fights for justice,
redemption, and love ?
1415
01:31:01,837 --> 01:31:06,508
? He will stop till
he bathes in their blood ?
1416
01:31:32,468 --> 01:31:35,204
[SIGHS]
1417
01:31:35,237 --> 01:31:38,874
He doesn't know
how to find us, does he?
1418
01:31:38,907 --> 01:31:40,943
[SIGHS]
1419
01:31:40,976 --> 01:31:45,914
Right. Well, luckily,
Cortex has a plan B.
1420
01:31:47,516 --> 01:31:50,919
There's always a way out.
1421
01:31:50,953 --> 01:31:55,324
So who wants to
kill themselves first?
1422
01:32:01,807 --> 01:32:05,276
Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
1423
01:32:05,334 --> 01:32:07,436
? A nameless evil
once buried forever ?
1424
01:32:07,469 --> 01:32:09,905
? Now he's awake,
and he's ready for terror ?
1425
01:32:09,938 --> 01:32:11,874
? But hold up, wait,
there's a catch ?
1426
01:32:11,907 --> 01:32:14,343
? This kid Mimi has
a plan to hatch ?
1427
01:32:14,376 --> 01:32:16,445
? With the magic,
she has the power ?
1428
01:32:16,478 --> 01:32:18,881
? The monster's her friend,
it's her finest hour ?
1429
01:32:18,914 --> 01:32:20,949
? They'll go adventures,
cause all kinds of trouble ?
1430
01:32:20,983 --> 01:32:23,419
? Blow up the world
and dance on the rubble ?
1431
01:32:23,452 --> 01:32:25,521
? First he needs a name ?
1432
01:32:25,554 --> 01:32:27,890
? Something cool,
it can't be lame ?
1433
01:32:27,923 --> 01:32:30,025
? That's when it struck her
so cool and so mean ?
1434
01:32:30,059 --> 01:32:32,928
? The monster will be named PG ?
1435
01:32:32,961 --> 01:32:35,464
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1436
01:32:35,497 --> 01:32:36,899
? PG for short ?
1437
01:32:36,932 --> 01:32:40,369
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1438
01:32:40,402 --> 01:32:41,570
? PG for short ?
1439
01:32:41,603 --> 01:32:44,640
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1440
01:32:44,673 --> 01:32:46,208
? PG for short ?
1441
01:32:46,241 --> 01:32:48,977
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1442
01:32:49,011 --> 01:32:50,346
? PG for short ?
1443
01:32:50,379 --> 01:32:51,580
? A council of aliens ?
1444
01:32:51,613 --> 01:32:53,315
? It's evil and scary ?
1445
01:32:53,349 --> 01:32:55,351
? Saw PG awaken from
where he was buried ?
1446
01:32:55,384 --> 01:32:57,519
? He has to be stopped,
and who better to do it ?
1447
01:32:57,553 --> 01:32:59,455
? Templar Pandora, yeah,
it's time to move ?
1448
01:32:59,488 --> 01:33:01,423
? But they weren't
the only team ?
1449
01:33:01,457 --> 01:33:04,293
? Who noticed that PG was free ?
1450
01:33:04,326 --> 01:33:06,028
? His old pals like
the Monster Mash ?
1451
01:33:06,061 --> 01:33:08,497
? Showed up to betray him
and take out the trash ?
1452
01:33:08,530 --> 01:33:10,666
? But Mr. Goreman,
he ain't fool ?
1453
01:33:10,699 --> 01:33:12,668
? He killed them all, yeah,
he took them to school ?
1454
01:33:12,701 --> 01:33:15,204
? And they'll never
forget his name ?
1455
01:33:15,237 --> 01:33:17,306
? It's the last thing
that they'll say ?
1456
01:33:17,339 --> 01:33:18,440
? PG ?
1457
01:33:18,474 --> 01:33:21,009
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1458
01:33:21,043 --> 01:33:22,378
? PG for short ?
1459
01:33:22,411 --> 01:33:25,447
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1460
01:33:25,481 --> 01:33:26,915
? PG for short ?
1461
01:33:26,949 --> 01:33:30,285
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1462
01:33:30,319 --> 01:33:31,420
? PG for short ?
1463
01:33:31,453 --> 01:33:34,323
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1464
01:33:34,356 --> 01:33:35,924
? PG for short ?
1465
01:33:35,958 --> 01:33:37,926
? Meanwhile at home,
Mimi's dad is a mess ?
1466
01:33:37,960 --> 01:33:40,329
? He can't keep a job
or cook a chicken breast ?
1467
01:33:40,362 --> 01:33:42,464
? When PG comes home
at his darkest hour ?
1468
01:33:42,498 --> 01:33:44,700
? Mimi's dad shows that
he's not a coward ?
1469
01:33:44,733 --> 01:33:48,670
? Final battle is at hand,
but PG can barely stand ?
1470
01:33:48,704 --> 01:33:51,573
? So he chooses a contest
to settle it all ?
1471
01:33:51,607 --> 01:33:53,575
? His fate is decided
by Crazy Ball ?
1472
01:33:53,609 --> 01:33:56,044
? When the galaxy
runs in fear ?
1473
01:33:56,078 --> 01:33:58,447
? That's when Mimi
and her brother appear ?
1474
01:33:58,480 --> 01:34:00,582
? At the end of the day,
it's not about killing ?
1475
01:34:00,616 --> 01:34:02,618
? It's all about family,
and I've got a feeling ?
1476
01:34:02,651 --> 01:34:04,720
? That everything will be okay ?
1477
01:34:04,753 --> 01:34:07,322
? Not sure why I feel that way ?
1478
01:34:07,356 --> 01:34:11,493
? The galaxy is in flames, and
a murdering monster's to blame ?
1479
01:34:11,527 --> 01:34:12,728
? PG ?
1480
01:34:12,761 --> 01:34:15,364
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1481
01:34:15,397 --> 01:34:16,598
? PG for short ?
1482
01:34:16,632 --> 01:34:19,601
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1483
01:34:19,635 --> 01:34:21,303
? PG for short ?
1484
01:34:21,336 --> 01:34:24,339
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1485
01:34:24,373 --> 01:34:25,674
? PG for short ?
1486
01:34:25,707 --> 01:34:28,744
? Psycho Goreman, psycho ?
1487
01:34:28,777 --> 01:34:31,213
? PG for short ?
1488
01:34:33,515 --> 01:34:35,317
? PG for short ?
1489
01:34:36,285 --> 01:34:37,653
? Stay in school, kids ?
1490
01:34:37,686 --> 01:34:39,755
? PG for short ?
1491
01:34:39,789 --> 01:34:42,424
? Don't do drugs ?
1492
01:34:42,458 --> 01:34:44,493
? PG for short ?
1493
01:34:46,762 --> 01:34:49,264
? PG for short ?
103263
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