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1
00:00:03,917 --> 00:00:06,127
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP
2
00:00:06,208 --> 00:00:09,078
AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
3
00:00:29,542 --> 00:00:31,502
BRRRRRR, YEAH!
4
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:46,002
DOES YOUR LIFE STINK
LIKE THIS GUY'S?
5
00:00:46,083 --> 00:00:47,793
[GROANING]
6
00:00:47,875 --> 00:00:50,785
Eddy: NOT WITH THIS
THING-A-MA-JIG.
7
00:00:56,042 --> 00:00:57,922
STUPEFYING,
ISN'T IT?
8
00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:01,790
BUT THAT AIN'T ALL
THE THING-A-MA-JIG
CAN DO!
9
00:01:02,667 --> 00:01:04,287
THERE'S MORE?
10
00:01:05,500 --> 00:01:06,830
A LOT MORE.
11
00:01:06,917 --> 00:01:08,827
AVERAGE JOE?
12
00:01:13,125 --> 00:01:15,205
I HAVE NOWHERE TO SIT!
13
00:01:15,042 --> 00:01:16,542
NO PROBLEMO, JOE.
14
00:01:16,625 --> 00:01:20,575
THE THING-A-MA-JIG HERE
IS THE ONLY THING
YOU'LL EVER NEED!
15
00:01:27,333 --> 00:01:30,083
NO PROBLEMO!
16
00:01:30,167 --> 00:01:33,377
LIFE.
17
00:01:33,458 --> 00:01:36,628
ME
SO FAST, MISTER!
18
00:01:36,708 --> 00:01:40,538
WHAT'S THIS GONNA COST
US HARD-WORKING STIFFS?
19
00:01:42,417 --> 00:01:44,627
YEAH. I BET
IT COSTS A LOT!
20
00:01:44,708 --> 00:01:48,538
A TECHNO-MARVEL LIKE THIS COULD
COST YOU UP TO A MILLION BUCKS,
21
00:01:48,625 --> 00:01:49,825
BUT FOR THE NEXT 5 MINUTES,
22
00:01:49,917 --> 00:01:54,167
YOU CAN HAVE IT FOR ONE
EASY PAYMENT OF 25 CENTS!
23
00:01:57,375 --> 00:02:00,535
ROLF'S YAMS INFLATE
WITH GLEE AT THIS
THING-A-MA-JIG!
24
00:02:00,625 --> 00:02:02,075
Sarah: LET'S GO
TRY IT, JIMMY.
25
00:02:02,167 --> 00:02:05,787
GEE WHILLIKERS, SARAH,
THIS THING-A-MA-JIG
ROCKS MY SOCKS!
26
00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:07,285
HMM.
27
00:02:07,375 --> 00:02:10,125
GENTLEMEN, I DISTINCTLY
REMEMBER ASSEMBLING
ONLY ONE THING-A-MA-JIG.
28
00:02:10,208 --> 00:02:16,078
HOW COULD WE SELL MORE
THAN ONE THING-A-MA-JIG
WHEN ONLY ONE EXISTS?
29
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:28,170
EDDY,
HOW COULD YOU?
30
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:30,130
YOU FALSELY SWINDLED
THOSE UNSUSPECTING CHILDREN
31
00:02:30,208 --> 00:02:31,328
OUT OF
THEIR ALLOWANCES!
32
00:02:31,417 --> 00:02:34,287
OH, I KNOW
THAT'S WHAT WE DO
IN EVERY SHOW,
33
00:02:34,375 --> 00:02:35,535
BUT NOT LIKE THIS.
34
00:02:35,625 --> 00:02:39,075
DOUBLE-DIPPING
WITHIN ONE DECEPTION
IS WRONG!
35
00:02:39,167 --> 00:02:41,917
LET'S GO BUY
SOME JAWBREAKERS.
36
00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:44,880
ARE YOU GOING
TO FINISH THAT?
37
00:02:44,958 --> 00:02:47,828
[EDDY AND ED LAUGHING]
38
00:02:47,917 --> 00:02:49,747
Ed: RUNNING!
39
00:02:53,917 --> 00:02:56,457
[EDDY LAUGHING]
40
00:03:00,750 --> 00:03:04,170
OH, LOOK UP
IN THE SKY!
41
00:03:05,167 --> 00:03:06,827
IS THAT A BIRD?
42
00:03:06,917 --> 00:03:08,207
Ed: COULD BE A PLANE!
43
00:03:08,042 --> 00:03:10,832
WHAT BIRD? DOES IT HAVE
A QUARTER IN ITS MOUTH?
44
00:03:10,917 --> 00:03:14,077
'CAUSE IF I GET
MY HANDS ON IT, I'LL--
45
00:03:17,375 --> 00:03:19,875
OH, MY ACHING--
46
00:03:22,750 --> 00:03:24,790
HOLY COW!
47
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:32,208
HEY, GET BACK HERE
WITH MY MONEY!
48
00:03:33,375 --> 00:03:34,455
ACORNS?
49
00:03:34,542 --> 00:03:35,882
Ed: DID YOU SEE THAT?
50
00:03:35,958 --> 00:03:40,208
HE JUST SWOOPED IN AND POW!
RIGHT IN YOUR KISSER, EDDY!
51
00:03:40,292 --> 00:03:44,632
I BET HE'S GOT, LIKE,
MUTANT POWER FEET
OR SOMETHING!
52
00:03:44,708 --> 00:03:46,128
HE STOLE MY CASH!
53
00:03:46,208 --> 00:03:49,918
I WONDER WHO THIS
MYSTERIOUS MARAUDER
COULD BE?
54
00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,500
IT SEEMS ODD
THAT HE'D APPEAR
OUT OF NOWHERE
55
00:03:52,583 --> 00:03:54,293
JUST IN
THE NICK OF TIME.
56
00:03:54,375 --> 00:03:56,455
OH, I KNOW
WHO IT IS!
57
00:03:56,542 --> 00:03:58,172
[OWL HOOTING]
58
00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:01,040
OK,
SO I DON'T KNOW.
59
00:04:01,375 --> 00:04:02,245
Sarah: AWW!
60
00:04:02,333 --> 00:04:03,133
SARAH! SARAH!
61
00:04:03,208 --> 00:04:04,998
MY BOX HAS NO
THING-A-MA-JIG!
62
00:04:05,083 --> 00:04:06,963
MINE WAS FULL
OF BRICKS, JIMMY.
63
00:04:07,042 --> 00:04:09,002
I'VE BEEN FOIST
UPON, SARAH.
64
00:04:09,083 --> 00:04:10,673
WAAH!
65
00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:14,170
ROLF WILL TEACH THOSE
RIFFRAFF ED BOYS WITH
HIS FOOT UP THEIR--
66
00:04:14,583 --> 00:04:16,253
Voice: YOUR MONEY
IS SAFE AND SOUND,
67
00:04:16,333 --> 00:04:18,133
GOOD CITIZENS OF
THE CUL-DE-SAC.
68
00:04:18,208 --> 00:04:20,828
RIPOFFS ARE
A THING OF THE PAST,
69
00:04:20,917 --> 00:04:22,537
FOR I, CAPTAIN MELONHEAD,
70
00:04:22,625 --> 00:04:28,035
AND SPLINTER THE WONDERWOOD
WILL PROTECT YOU!
71
00:04:29,583 --> 00:04:31,173
IS THE CIRCUS
IN TOWN?
72
00:04:31,250 --> 00:04:33,500
THAT GUY SAVED
OUR MONEY!
73
00:04:33,583 --> 00:04:36,173
WHO WAS THAT
MASKED MARVEL?
74
00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:37,000
Edd:
WHOMEVER IT WAS
75
00:04:37,083 --> 00:04:39,503
SEEMS TO HAVE
A COMPLEX
PERSONALITY.
76
00:04:39,583 --> 00:04:40,833
REALLY! ACORNS?
77
00:04:40,917 --> 00:04:44,417
WE GOTTA FIND THIS GUY
AND GET MY MONEY!
78
00:04:44,500 --> 00:04:46,040
Sarah: SUCKERS!
79
00:04:46,125 --> 00:04:48,745
[KIDS LAUGHING]
80
00:04:48,833 --> 00:04:52,633
Rolf: NO MORE
THE MR. SMART GUY,
HUH, ED BOYS?
81
00:04:52,708 --> 00:04:56,498
I BELIEVE
THIS BELONGS TO YOU.
82
00:04:56,583 --> 00:04:57,543
HEH HEH HEH!
83
00:04:57,625 --> 00:05:00,455
FREE! WE'RE FREE
AT LAST!
84
00:05:03,583 --> 00:05:06,043
THAT GUY GAVE THEM
BACK THEIR MONEY!
85
00:05:06,125 --> 00:05:07,035
Ed: OH, BOY!
86
00:05:07,125 --> 00:05:10,035
HE MUST BE SOME
COMIC BOOK HERO GUY!
87
00:05:10,125 --> 00:05:11,035
[GIGGLING]
88
00:05:11,125 --> 00:05:12,205
COMIC BOOKS?
REALLY, ED.
89
00:05:12,292 --> 00:05:15,582
WHAT WE HAVE HERE
IS A CAREFREE,
UPSTANDING YOUNG MAN
90
00:05:15,667 --> 00:05:17,997
WHO'S SIMPLY
TRYING TO DO
THE RIGHT THING.
91
00:05:18,083 --> 00:05:19,833
WHY, I APPLAUD HIS--
92
00:05:19,917 --> 00:05:21,497
Eddy: OH, YEAH?
93
00:05:22,208 --> 00:05:24,038
THIS PLACE AIN'T
BIG ENOUGH FOR
THE TWO OF US.
94
00:05:24,125 --> 00:05:27,205
I WILL HAVE MY DAY,
SCAM WRECKER-UPPER!
95
00:05:27,292 --> 00:05:29,632
[CACKLING]
96
00:05:34,125 --> 00:05:36,165
[BIRDS CAWING]
97
00:05:36,708 --> 00:05:38,288
Edd: HOW
EMBARRASSING.
98
00:05:38,375 --> 00:05:40,415
OK, NOW, SAY IT.
DO IT! COME ON!
99
00:05:40,500 --> 00:05:43,750
AHEM. UM, I WOULD
LIKE TO PURCHASE
100
00:05:43,833 --> 00:05:45,923
ONE OF YOUR BUTTS,
IF I MAY.
101
00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,920
PLEASE TAKE MY
HARD-EARNED MONEY.
102
00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:51,210
YOU GOT IT, SUCKER--
I MEAN, CUSTOMER.
103
00:05:51,292 --> 00:05:53,382
HERE'S YOUR
BRAND-NEW BUTT!
104
00:05:53,458 --> 00:05:54,378
OH, HAPPY DAY!
105
00:05:54,458 --> 00:05:56,538
THANK YOU,
DISHONEST
STORE CLERK.
106
00:05:56,625 --> 00:05:59,785
I WILL GO AND USE
MY BUTT NOW.
107
00:06:00,792 --> 00:06:05,132
HEY, HOLD YOUR HORSES!
108
00:06:06,208 --> 00:06:07,628
THIS BUTT'S BEEN USED!
109
00:06:07,708 --> 00:06:09,708
HA HA! YOU'VE
BEEN FOOLED.
110
00:06:09,792 --> 00:06:12,882
I HAVE RIPPED OFF
THE INNOCENT
YET AGAIN!
111
00:06:12,958 --> 00:06:15,168
[WHISPERING]
Keep an eye out, Ed.
112
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:16,960
OH, BOY, OH, BOY,
OH, BOY,
113
00:06:17,042 --> 00:06:19,542
OH, BOY, OH, BOY--HUH?
114
00:06:19,625 --> 00:06:21,375
I SEE HIM, EDDY!
115
00:06:24,292 --> 00:06:25,462
RIGHT ON TIME.
116
00:06:25,542 --> 00:06:29,542
SHED A TEAR,
'CAUSE CAPTAIN
MELONHEAD IS HERE!
117
00:06:29,625 --> 00:06:32,125
WAH HA HA HA!
118
00:06:34,958 --> 00:06:35,788
HA HA HA!
119
00:06:35,875 --> 00:06:38,955
YOU'VE MET YOUR MATCH,
MELONHEAD.
120
00:06:39,042 --> 00:06:43,672
PREPARE YOURSELF FOR
PROFESSOR SCAM!
121
00:06:43,750 --> 00:06:45,540
HA HA HA!
122
00:06:45,625 --> 00:06:48,165
THE EVILDOER
HAS ARRIVED!
123
00:06:48,250 --> 00:06:50,040
HE'S LOST IT,
HONESTLY.
124
00:06:50,125 --> 00:06:53,875
UNHAND THAT MONEY,
PROFESSOR SCAM!
125
00:06:53,958 --> 00:06:56,168
NEVER. HI-YA!
126
00:06:56,250 --> 00:07:00,460
I WILL NOW MAKE MY ESCAPE
IN MY BAD-TO-THE-BONE,
127
00:07:00,542 --> 00:07:04,962
MEANER-THAN-A-JUNKYARD-DOG
PROFESSOR SCAM FLIER!
128
00:07:05,042 --> 00:07:08,752
HA HA HA!
129
00:07:08,833 --> 00:07:10,383
OOPS.
130
00:07:10,458 --> 00:07:12,248
OOH! OOH!
131
00:07:12,333 --> 00:07:14,543
[WHISTLING]
132
00:07:17,208 --> 00:07:19,918
IT'S MELON TIME!
133
00:07:20,458 --> 00:07:23,168
LOOK OUT FOR
THOSE FEET, EDDY!
134
00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,080
HA HA HA!
135
00:07:28,833 --> 00:07:31,463
YAAAAHHHH!
136
00:07:31,542 --> 00:07:32,502
OOF!
137
00:07:32,583 --> 00:07:33,753
OH, NO. DOUBLE D!
138
00:07:33,833 --> 00:07:38,133
PROFESSOR SCAM
HAS UNMASKED
CAPTAIN MELONHEAD!
139
00:07:40,208 --> 00:07:41,708
YOU'RE THROUGH,
MELONHEAD.
140
00:07:41,792 --> 00:07:44,212
REVEAL YOURSELF!
141
00:07:44,042 --> 00:07:48,832
THERE'S TWO HALVES
TO EVERY MELON,
PROFESSOR SCAM.
142
00:07:48,917 --> 00:07:50,037
THAT WAS CLEVER.
143
00:07:50,125 --> 00:07:51,165
OH, YEAH?
144
00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:54,380
WELL, MY RAY OF RICHES
WILL CURL YOUR TOES!
145
00:07:57,167 --> 00:07:59,077
THINK FAST, MELONHEAD.
146
00:08:00,250 --> 00:08:03,210
THE RAY OF RICHES
WILL NEVER PENETRATE
147
00:08:03,292 --> 00:08:06,382
THE FORCE PEEL
OF MELON.
148
00:08:21,583 --> 00:08:24,333
HAD ENOUGH,
MELONHE--
149
00:08:24,417 --> 00:08:26,247
UNH!
150
00:08:26,333 --> 00:08:29,133
[LOUD RUMBLING]
151
00:08:35,042 --> 00:08:36,792
AAH!
152
00:08:44,417 --> 00:08:47,497
OH! HUH?
153
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:50,130
HI-YA!
154
00:08:50,208 --> 00:08:51,168
FREEZE, MELONHEAD,
155
00:08:51,250 --> 00:08:54,710
OR THE SIDEKICK
SWELLS UP
LIKE A BALLOON.
156
00:08:56,167 --> 00:08:57,997
Melonhead: SPLINTER!
157
00:08:58,083 --> 00:09:01,543
THIS IS BETWEEN
ME AND YOU,
PROFESSOR SCAM.
158
00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:04,205
GIVE ME AN EXCUSE.
159
00:09:04,292 --> 00:09:05,582
NO!
160
00:09:05,667 --> 00:09:09,377
WAIT! TAKE ME!
I'M THE ONE YOU WANT.
161
00:09:09,458 --> 00:09:13,208
I SURRENDER,
PROFESSOR SCAM.
162
00:09:20,250 --> 00:09:22,630
BUT, EDDY,
NOT MY GRAVY!
163
00:09:22,708 --> 00:09:23,958
SILENCE, HENCHMEN!
164
00:09:24,042 --> 00:09:27,292
OH, COME ON, EDDY.
HAVEN'T YOU MILKED
THIS ENOUGH?
165
00:09:27,375 --> 00:09:28,495
LOOK AT ME!
166
00:09:28,583 --> 00:09:30,583
WILL YOU GUYS JUST LAUGH
LIKE EVIL HENCHMEN,
167
00:09:30,667 --> 00:09:32,457
FOR PETE'S SAKE?
168
00:09:34,958 --> 00:09:39,038
TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT
YOUR TOMB OF DOOM,
MELONHEAD.
169
00:09:39,125 --> 00:09:40,125
HA HA HA HA!
170
00:09:40,208 --> 00:09:44,288
LOOK! OUR HERO DANGLES
LIKE VICTOR'S MILK SPOUTS!
171
00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:47,075
VICTOR'S GOT
MILK SPOUTS?
172
00:09:47,167 --> 00:09:49,997
YOUR GRAVY GRAVE
AWAITS!
173
00:09:50,083 --> 00:09:51,753
HE'S DEAD!
174
00:09:51,833 --> 00:09:54,253
MY GRAVY,
DOUBLE D!
175
00:09:54,333 --> 00:09:57,633
WHOA! OH!
176
00:09:57,708 --> 00:09:59,748
HA HA HA HA!
177
00:09:59,833 --> 00:10:02,543
Ed: RELEASE THE GRAVY!
178
00:10:02,625 --> 00:10:05,665
'CAUSE I, AVERAGE JOE,
SAYS SO!
179
00:10:10,625 --> 00:10:12,165
ED!
180
00:10:13,833 --> 00:10:16,173
LEAVE A MARK,
MELON DUDE!
181
00:10:16,250 --> 00:10:18,000
Eddy: I GIVE! I GIVE!
182
00:10:18,083 --> 00:10:19,423
OUCH! OWW! OUCH!
183
00:10:19,500 --> 00:10:23,380
MY GRAVY IS SAFE TO
FERMENT ANOTHER DAY,
DOUBLE D.
184
00:10:23,458 --> 00:10:27,038
THANK YOU FOR SHARING
THAT INFORMATION, ED.
185
00:10:32,208 --> 00:10:34,788
[EDDY SCREAMING]
186
00:10:38,667 --> 00:10:40,037
Eddy: OH, YEAH?
187
00:10:40,125 --> 00:10:43,125
WELL, DON'T COUNT YOUR SEEDS
BEFORE THEY HATCH, MELONHEAD,
188
00:10:43,208 --> 00:10:46,578
FOR LIKE A BEAN BURRITO,
I SHALL RETURN!
189
00:10:46,667 --> 00:10:48,167
HENCHMEN,
TO THE SCAM FORTRESS!
190
00:10:48,250 --> 00:10:53,380
IT'S ALL FUN AND GAMES
TILL SOMEONE GETS A SPLINTER.
191
00:10:55,750 --> 00:10:58,670
[EDDY LAUGHING]
192
00:10:59,833 --> 00:11:01,173
CITIZENS OF THE CUL-DE-SAC,
193
00:11:01,250 --> 00:11:05,000
PROFESSOR SCAM
WILL NO LONGER THREATEN
YOUR WEEKLY ALLOWANCES,
194
00:11:05,083 --> 00:11:08,583
AS I, CAPTAIN MELONHEAD,
AND SPLINTER THE WONDERWOOD
195
00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:10,997
WILL ALWAYS FIGHT FOR JUSTICE
AND THE--
196
00:11:11,083 --> 00:11:12,253
GIVE IT A REST,
JONNY.
197
00:11:12,333 --> 00:11:15,293
Sarah: YEAH,
WE ALREADY HEARD IT.
198
00:11:16,208 --> 00:11:17,878
TOODLE-OO,
CAPTAIN MELONHEAD!
199
00:11:17,958 --> 00:11:19,998
Rolf: WHAT A FINE HEAD
OF PRODUCE HE HAS, YES?
200
00:11:20,083 --> 00:11:24,133
BACK TO THE MELONCAVE,
WONDERWOOD.
201
00:11:24,833 --> 00:11:25,713
ANOTHER DAY--OW!--
202
00:11:25,792 --> 00:11:29,082
AND ANOTHER DOUGHNUT,
HUH, BUDDY?
203
00:11:41,167 --> 00:11:43,627
[LAUGHTER]
204
00:11:55,167 --> 00:11:58,247
KEVIN LOOKS LIKE
HE'S READY TO
BUST AN ARTERY.
205
00:11:58,333 --> 00:12:00,173
HA HA HA!
206
00:12:02,333 --> 00:12:04,923
HAVE A SODA,
CURLY-LOCKS.
207
00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:06,830
WE'RE CELEBRATING!
208
00:12:06,917 --> 00:12:08,787
I DON'T WANT
ANY PART OF THIS.
209
00:12:08,875 --> 00:12:09,955
YOU'RE IN
BIG TROUBLE, EDDY!
210
00:12:10,042 --> 00:12:11,752
OLD SHOVELTON
CAN'T DO NOTHIN'.
211
00:12:11,833 --> 00:12:15,333
HE GOT GROUNDED
TODAY. HA HA HA!
212
00:12:15,417 --> 00:12:18,457
A TOAST
TO SHOVELTON!
213
00:12:18,542 --> 00:12:21,172
WITH LOTS OF BUTTER!
214
00:12:22,875 --> 00:12:24,665
AHH!
215
00:12:26,875 --> 00:12:28,575
A DAYTIME NAP
CAN INVIGORATE,
216
00:12:28,667 --> 00:12:30,287
BUT NOTHING IS
MORE GRATIFYING
217
00:12:30,375 --> 00:12:32,285
THAN A GOOD BOOK,
JIMMY.
218
00:12:32,375 --> 00:12:33,535
[MOANING]
219
00:12:33,625 --> 00:12:34,785
Eddy: QUICK!
DOUBLE D!
220
00:12:34,875 --> 00:12:37,325
YOU'RE NEVER GONNA
BELIEVE THIS.
KEVIN GOT--
221
00:12:37,417 --> 00:12:39,207
RECYCLED BOOKS, EDDY!
222
00:12:39,042 --> 00:12:41,132
LOOK AT THIS PROFUSION
OF KNOWLEDGE!
223
00:12:41,208 --> 00:12:44,168
THE LIBRARY
WAS HAVING A SALE.
HOW COULD I RESIST?
224
00:12:44,250 --> 00:12:45,210
LOOK AT THESE GEMS:
225
00:12:45,292 --> 00:12:48,632
NOCTURNAL
BURROWING INSECTS...
226
00:12:48,708 --> 00:12:49,458
COOL!
227
00:12:49,542 --> 00:12:51,882
THE ENCHANTED SPLEEN...
228
00:12:51,958 --> 00:12:53,168
COMPELLING.
229
00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:55,670
SCORES OF SPORES...
230
00:12:55,750 --> 00:12:57,290
I CAN RELATE.
231
00:12:57,375 --> 00:12:59,165
101 LATIN PARTY JOKES.
232
00:12:59,250 --> 00:13:01,130
Ed: DO TELL!
233
00:13:02,917 --> 00:13:04,037
ARGH!
234
00:13:04,125 --> 00:13:08,825
THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF
OBSCURE DISEASES?
235
00:13:09,375 --> 00:13:12,035
THIS LOOKS EDIFYING.
236
00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:15,497
"THE LACKADAISY-CATHRO
DISEASE."
237
00:13:15,583 --> 00:13:17,083
LISTEN TO THIS, ED.
238
00:13:17,167 --> 00:13:21,037
"SYMPTOMS INCLUDE
THE RATIONALIZING OF
MUNDANE CIRCUMSTANCES,
239
00:13:21,125 --> 00:13:26,165
HABITUAL CLEANLINESS,
AND AN ABNORMAL FIXATION
TO HEADWEAR."
240
00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:28,130
THAT SOUNDS
RESEMBLING,
241
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:31,038
'CAUSE IT SOUNDS
LIKE, UH...
242
00:13:31,125 --> 00:13:34,455
IT SOUNDS
LIKE SOCKHEAD,
BONEHEAD!
243
00:13:36,375 --> 00:13:38,455
ME? REALLY?
244
00:13:38,542 --> 00:13:41,172
WHY, THAT'S JUST PLAIN SILLY.
HA HA HA!
245
00:13:41,250 --> 00:13:42,580
I'LL GIVE YOU RATIONALIZING,
246
00:13:42,667 --> 00:13:45,577
BUT HABITUAL
OR ABNORMAL FIXATION?
247
00:13:45,667 --> 00:13:47,247
PLEASE.
248
00:13:48,458 --> 00:13:50,458
DID YOU HEAR
WHAT I SAID?
249
00:13:50,542 --> 00:13:52,252
KEVIN'S STUCK
IN HIS ROOM.
250
00:13:52,333 --> 00:13:55,083
GROUNDED,
I TELL YA!
251
00:13:57,667 --> 00:13:59,037
QUICK!
HE'S HIDING!
252
00:13:59,125 --> 00:14:00,205
HA HA HA!
253
00:14:00,042 --> 00:14:01,922
[GROANS]
254
00:14:07,625 --> 00:14:08,665
[WHISTLE]
255
00:14:08,750 --> 00:14:11,500
[DOORBELL RINGING]
256
00:14:19,208 --> 00:14:22,918
AH, AH, AH.
YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED
TO BE OUTSIDE.
257
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,920
YOU'VE BEEN GROUNDED!
258
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,130
GRRRR!
259
00:14:26,208 --> 00:14:29,038
[EDDY LAUGHING]
260
00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:35,580
Ed's voice:
HELLO, KEVIN.
261
00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,667
WHY ARE YOU
SUCH A SAD SACK?
262
00:14:37,750 --> 00:14:40,330
'CAUSE HE HAS
BEEN GROUNDED.
263
00:14:40,417 --> 00:14:41,827
OH, PARDON ME.
264
00:14:41,917 --> 00:14:43,997
[LAUGHING]
265
00:14:44,083 --> 00:14:46,963
I SHOULD BE IN
SHOW BUSINESS.
266
00:14:49,042 --> 00:14:51,542
EDDY, DO I MUMBLE
MY WORDS?
267
00:14:51,625 --> 00:14:52,625
HUH? YOU SAY
SOMETHING?
268
00:14:52,708 --> 00:14:55,208
QUIT MUMBLING AND
PUT THAT BOOK AWAY.
269
00:14:55,292 --> 00:14:56,792
[GASP]
270
00:14:56,875 --> 00:15:00,535
"OTHER SYMPTOMS
INCLUDE WEAKNESS IN
THE LOWER EXTREMITIES."
271
00:15:00,625 --> 00:15:02,325
HUH?
272
00:15:02,750 --> 00:15:09,210
EDDY, I THINK I HAVE
LACKADAISY-CATHRO DISEASE!
273
00:15:12,875 --> 00:15:14,035
Eddy: GIVE IT UP,
DOUBLE D.
274
00:15:14,125 --> 00:15:16,125
YOU'RE ABOUT
AS SICK AS ED IS.
275
00:15:16,208 --> 00:15:20,038
Ed: HELLO, I'M STINKY...
AND I'M CLEMMY!
276
00:15:20,125 --> 00:15:21,625
HA HA HA HA!
277
00:15:21,708 --> 00:15:22,878
BUT NOW THAT
YOU MENTION IT,
278
00:15:22,958 --> 00:15:26,078
YOU DO LOOK
KIND OF GREEN
AROUND THE GILLS.
279
00:15:26,167 --> 00:15:30,287
Ed: HE DOES?
WHAT A PITY.
280
00:15:30,375 --> 00:15:32,455
OH, I'M SO SICK.
281
00:15:32,542 --> 00:15:33,422
[MOANING]
282
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:36,130
HEH HEH HEH!
LET ME SEE THIS THING.
283
00:15:36,208 --> 00:15:40,418
YEP, THIS IS YOU
ALL OVER, DOUBLE D.
284
00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:42,170
HA HA HA!
HA HA HA!
285
00:15:42,250 --> 00:15:43,420
Eddy: IT SAYS HERE
286
00:15:43,500 --> 00:15:46,380
THERE'S SOME TESTS
TO SEE HOW ADVANCED
IT IS.
287
00:15:46,458 --> 00:15:47,328
TESTS?
288
00:15:47,417 --> 00:15:48,917
OF COURSE, TESTS!
289
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:52,630
MEDICAL SCIENCE
WILL PROVIDE THE ANSWER.
290
00:15:55,917 --> 00:15:59,627
PAGING DR. ED. DR. ED.
291
00:16:00,333 --> 00:16:01,463
ONE MOMENT, PLEASE.
292
00:16:01,542 --> 00:16:04,172
I WILL BE
RIGHT WITH YOU.
293
00:16:04,583 --> 00:16:06,173
I'M CONFUSED, EDDY.
294
00:16:06,250 --> 00:16:08,130
HOW IS ED QUALIFIED IN--
295
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:09,830
SAY IT AIN'T SO,
DOUBLE D!
296
00:16:09,917 --> 00:16:11,127
CONFUSED?
297
00:16:11,208 --> 00:16:14,078
THAT'S A SYMPTOM OF THAT
LACKADAISY-CATHRO DISEASE!
298
00:16:14,167 --> 00:16:16,287
AAH!
299
00:16:16,375 --> 00:16:17,285
I'LL BE BACK.
300
00:16:17,375 --> 00:16:19,375
NICE SHORTS,
ROMEO.
301
00:16:22,125 --> 00:16:24,995
PLEASE,
REST YOUR BUTTOCKS.
302
00:16:35,875 --> 00:16:38,125
HA HA HA!
303
00:16:38,208 --> 00:16:40,168
Kevin: HEY!
304
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,000
HMM.
305
00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:45,083
AN EGGBEATER, ED?
IS THAT PART OF THE--
306
00:16:54,042 --> 00:16:56,132
WHAT IS IT?
307
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:58,670
HMM.
308
00:16:58,750 --> 00:17:01,080
WHAT IS IT, ED?
309
00:17:01,167 --> 00:17:03,417
Ed: HMM.
310
00:17:03,500 --> 00:17:05,080
HUH?
311
00:17:12,167 --> 00:17:15,997
HMM. HOW LONG
HAVE YOU BEEN
A SIZE 2?
312
00:17:16,083 --> 00:17:17,133
SIZE 2?
313
00:17:17,208 --> 00:17:20,458
BUT I'VE ALWAYS WORN
A SIZE 5 SHOE, DOCTOR.
314
00:17:20,542 --> 00:17:22,042
SOUNDS LIKE
ANOTHER SYMPTOM TO ME.
315
00:17:22,125 --> 00:17:24,825
DID DR. ED GIVE YOU
THE RUBBER GLOVE
TREATMENT YET?
316
00:17:24,917 --> 00:17:30,707
OH, EDDY, THIS
LACKADAISY-CATHRO DISEASE
IS PROGRESSING RAPIDLY!
317
00:17:30,792 --> 00:17:32,832
I'M SO UNWELL.
318
00:17:32,917 --> 00:17:33,917
JEEZ LOUISE!
319
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,960
HAS ANYBODY TRIED
TO KICK YOU YET?
320
00:17:37,417 --> 00:17:38,747
NO.
321
00:17:38,833 --> 00:17:41,753
GOOD, 'CAUSE THAT'S
THE FINAL SYMPTOM.
322
00:17:41,833 --> 00:17:43,583
YOU'RE IN THE CLEAR,
BUDDY BOY.
323
00:17:43,667 --> 00:17:46,877
WHY, I FEEL
BETTER ALREADY.
324
00:17:46,958 --> 00:17:49,378
THANK YOU,
DR. ED.
325
00:17:50,792 --> 00:17:51,672
OH, NO!
326
00:17:51,750 --> 00:17:53,040
I THOUGHT
YOU DIDN'T HAVE
327
00:17:53,125 --> 00:17:54,205
THAT LAST SYMPTOM,
DOUBLE D.
328
00:17:54,292 --> 00:17:56,042
YOU GOTTA
FIGHT THIS, MAN!
329
00:17:56,125 --> 00:17:59,035
DOCTOR, PLEASE,
DO SOMETHING.
330
00:18:00,833 --> 00:18:01,883
NEXT!
331
00:18:01,958 --> 00:18:03,078
Edd: WAIT!
332
00:18:03,167 --> 00:18:04,077
[GROANING]
333
00:18:04,167 --> 00:18:05,997
TELL ME THE TRUTH,
DOCTOR.
334
00:18:06,083 --> 00:18:09,793
HOW LONG AM I
FOR THIS WORLD?
335
00:18:09,875 --> 00:18:10,625
HUH?
336
00:18:10,708 --> 00:18:13,788
UM...
TILL LUNCH?
337
00:18:16,875 --> 00:18:19,875
HERE. QUICK, WRITE.
HURRY, DOUBLE D!
338
00:18:19,958 --> 00:18:23,788
A POEM ON THE BEAUTY
OF LIFE AS I KNOW IT?
339
00:18:23,875 --> 00:18:27,035
NO, YOUR WILL.
340
00:18:27,125 --> 00:18:29,825
LEAVE ME
SOMETHING NICE.
341
00:18:29,917 --> 00:18:30,627
Ed: OH! OH!
342
00:18:30,708 --> 00:18:32,378
AND I WILL TAKE
YOUR HAT,
343
00:18:32,458 --> 00:18:34,498
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
344
00:18:35,625 --> 00:18:39,705
OH, DOUBLE D,
I KNEW THEE WELL.
345
00:18:39,792 --> 00:18:42,042
[SOBBING]
346
00:18:42,125 --> 00:18:44,165
HA HA HA!
[CRYING]
347
00:18:44,250 --> 00:18:46,080
POOR DOUBLE D.
348
00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:49,167
DOUBLE D
AIN'T REALLY SICK,
LUMMOX, REMEMBER?
349
00:18:49,250 --> 00:18:52,080
THAT'S SOME GOOD TV
RIGHT THERE.
350
00:18:52,167 --> 00:18:55,377
NOW, BACK TO
OUR CAGED RAT.
351
00:18:55,458 --> 00:18:59,708
HEY, JUGHEAD!
OVER HERE!
352
00:19:00,125 --> 00:19:01,035
Ed: WHOA HO HO!
353
00:19:01,125 --> 00:19:04,415
I AM TURNING INTO
A WEREWOLF, EDDY!
354
00:19:08,250 --> 00:19:10,130
[LAUGHTER
AND INDISTINCT CHATTER]
355
00:19:10,208 --> 00:19:11,918
MY BELOVED PEER GROUP.
356
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:15,460
EDD BOY, WHY DOES
YOUR FACE SAG LOWER THAN
NANA'S INNER THIGHS?
357
00:19:15,542 --> 00:19:19,922
COME! JOIN US FOR
BEACH MERRIMENT AND
EGGPLANT ANTIPASTO.
358
00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:21,290
DEAR ROLF,
359
00:19:21,375 --> 00:19:26,455
ALWAYS GIVING,
THOUGHTFUL...
360
00:19:26,542 --> 00:19:30,672
THAT'S WHY I WANT YOU
TO HAVE THIS.
361
00:19:30,750 --> 00:19:31,710
A PEANUT SMASHER?
362
00:19:31,792 --> 00:19:36,542
OH, ROLF,
YOU'RE SO UNEDUCATED.
363
00:19:36,625 --> 00:19:39,785
GLOOMY GUS
IS RIGHT, BUDDY.
364
00:19:39,875 --> 00:19:42,455
JONNY, IS THAT YOU?
365
00:19:42,542 --> 00:19:47,252
I'D LIKE TO
BEQUEATH TO YOU
MY REMOTE CONTROL.
366
00:19:47,333 --> 00:19:48,423
FAR OUT!
367
00:19:48,500 --> 00:19:51,580
DOUBLE D,
ARE YOU, LIKE,
GOING SOMEWHERE?
368
00:19:51,667 --> 00:19:53,747
NAZZ, NAZZ, NAZZ...
369
00:19:53,833 --> 00:19:57,633
SO MANY THINGS
LEFT UNSAID.
370
00:19:57,708 --> 00:19:58,628
REALLY?
371
00:19:58,708 --> 00:20:01,128
LIKE WHAT, DOUBLE D?
372
00:20:02,458 --> 00:20:04,788
[SOBBING]
373
00:20:04,875 --> 00:20:06,665
WHAT'S HIS PROBLEM?
374
00:20:06,750 --> 00:20:11,540
THE SICKENING PANG OF
HOPE DEFERRED, SARAH.
375
00:20:12,292 --> 00:20:14,712
HEH HEH HEH!
376
00:20:15,667 --> 00:20:17,207
OH!
HEE HEE HEE!
377
00:20:17,042 --> 00:20:21,502
CURSE THIS DREADED
LACKADAISY-CATHRO DISEASE!
378
00:20:21,583 --> 00:20:25,213
DUDE, LOOKS LIKE
SOMEONE'S PLAYING
A JOKE ON YOU.
379
00:20:25,292 --> 00:20:27,962
DON'T SWEAT IT, OK?
380
00:20:29,417 --> 00:20:32,167
Sarah:
WHAT AN IDIOT!
381
00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:35,880
OH, THOSE--THOSE...
382
00:20:35,958 --> 00:20:38,578
RAPSCALLIONS!
383
00:20:40,125 --> 00:20:41,205
[WATER DRIPPING]
384
00:20:41,042 --> 00:20:44,082
Kevin: OK, NOW I'M MAD.
385
00:20:44,167 --> 00:20:46,577
[LAUGHING]
386
00:20:48,042 --> 00:20:51,082
ARE YOU PROUD
OF YOURSELVES?!
387
00:20:51,167 --> 00:20:52,957
HANG ON THERE,
HAMLET.
388
00:20:53,042 --> 00:20:54,042
HA HA HA!
389
00:20:54,125 --> 00:20:56,075
TOO RICH, HUH,
DOUBLE D?
390
00:20:56,167 --> 00:20:58,167
LISTEN TO ME!
391
00:20:58,250 --> 00:20:59,670
HOW CAN WE NOT?
392
00:20:59,750 --> 00:21:02,000
THIS WAS FOUND
ON MY BODY!
393
00:21:02,083 --> 00:21:05,793
YOU HAD ME BELIEVE
I WAS EXPIRING!
394
00:21:05,875 --> 00:21:10,745
RAGE! AIN'T THAT
A SYMPTOM, DR. ED?
395
00:21:10,833 --> 00:21:15,043
I GOT OUT EARLY
FOR GOOD BEHAVIOR.
396
00:21:15,125 --> 00:21:15,955
KEVIN?!
397
00:21:16,042 --> 00:21:20,042
HONEST, I TRIED
TO STOP HIM...
398
00:21:20,125 --> 00:21:22,535
BUT ED INSISTED
WE BUST
YOUR CHOPS.
399
00:21:22,625 --> 00:21:24,205
HE DID!
400
00:21:24,042 --> 00:21:26,212
SPONGE STAMPEDE!
401
00:21:26,292 --> 00:21:29,212
GET BACK HERE!
402
00:21:30,750 --> 00:21:35,670
Both:
♪ KEVIN CAN'T GET US,
KEVIN CAN'T GET US ♪
403
00:21:35,750 --> 00:21:38,460
OH, NO, ED!
I'M SO SCARED!
404
00:21:38,542 --> 00:21:41,132
I'M SHAKING
LIKE CHEESE!
405
00:21:41,208 --> 00:21:42,208
[LAUGHING]
406
00:21:42,292 --> 00:21:43,962
GRRRR!
407
00:21:44,042 --> 00:21:44,962
Edd: AHEM.
408
00:21:45,042 --> 00:21:49,002
OH, LOOK,
EDDY'S SPARE
HOUSE KEY.
409
00:21:49,083 --> 00:21:49,923
OOPS.
410
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:51,380
HOW CARELESS OF ME.
411
00:21:51,458 --> 00:21:55,038
I SEEM TO HAVE
MISPLACED IT.
412
00:22:04,917 --> 00:22:07,377
Eddy: NO!
NOT THE FACE, KEV!
413
00:22:07,458 --> 00:22:10,078
KEVIN'S JUSTIFIED
PUMMEL DISORDER:
414
00:22:10,167 --> 00:22:12,627
SYMPTOMS ARE
BRUISING OF THE EYE
415
00:22:12,708 --> 00:22:14,708
FOLLOWED BY
A SORE REAR END
416
00:22:14,792 --> 00:22:16,962
AND A RAPID RELEASE
OF HOT AIR
417
00:22:17,042 --> 00:22:18,542
FROM AN INFLATED EGO.
418
00:22:18,625 --> 00:22:20,205
HA HA HA HA!
419
00:22:20,292 --> 00:22:22,172
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
420
00:22:22,250 --> 00:22:23,670
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP
421
00:22:23,750 --> 00:22:26,130
AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
422
00:22:28,167 --> 00:22:29,827
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
423
00:22:29,917 --> 00:22:31,207
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
424
00:22:31,292 --> 00:22:33,462
--www.ncicap.org--
425
00:22:37,792 --> 00:22:39,132
♪ ED, EDD N EDDY
426
00:22:39,208 --> 00:22:40,998
BRRRRRR, YEAH!
28022
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