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Why don't we see
ghosts every day?

The truth is ghosts are
around us all the time,

but most hauntings are so
small they go unnoticed.

For example, a pen,

a pen lid,

a gravel,

a trapped sound...

Olé, Olé, Olé!

A child's ball.

Or balls.

A wheeled bin.

Hello. I'm Vincent Dooley.
Welcome to the next in my series<

exploring the rare and
wonderful supernatural gifts

known as The Talents.

Later in this episode: Do you ever
have nightmares after eating cheese?

You might have eaten a ghost.

Even the weakest ghosts can
possess cheese quite easily

due to the living bacteria
in the cheese.

But what is a ghost? Well,
they were once just like us.

I'm really sorry
for murdering you, Daddy.

Rose, stop, will ya?

You didn't murder him, you spa.
It was literally an accident.

What do they call it when you
kill your father, anyway?

Dad slaughter?

Come on.

I'm really sorry
for slaughtering you, Daddy.

Come on, sis!
You're gonna be late for work.

Well, we're
flying along here.

Yeah.
It's grand, isn't it?

Yeah, it's not too hard.
Yeah.

I wouldn't get cocky, but...

Yeah.
Yeah.

Now, there's nothing at all
to worry about,

just listen to the soothing
sound of my voice.

- Shit!
- Oh, mind your language.

- Sorry, sorry.
- Come on. Go ahead.

Into first.

Uh, don't breathe on me
I'd say, just...

And are you up to
anything tonight?

Uh, I'm en--
I'm engaged actually, sorry.

No, You're fine.
That wasn't...

I was just making driving
instructor conversation.

Oh, oh. Okay. Okay.
I have zero interest there.

No one, I'm home.

Miss you, Pops.
Miss you, Mary Black.

What's going on in here today?

Ah, lasagne. Oh, que pasta.

I didn't really have
any breakfast so...

I'll have a starter.

Hi!
This is Rose's Driving School.

Now, if You're calling about driving
lessons, please leave a message.

If You're calling about the other
thing, I haven't done that for years,

okay, so just leave me alone.

Hello.
I hear you talk to the ghosts.

There's something haunting
in me green bin!

Will you come up
and take a look?

I'm being driven bloody mad!

Yeah, so, I lost my charger.

Could you just use your powers
real quick and find it?

- And also maybe have a look
to see if I'm pregnant?
- Oh my God.

How hungry would you have to be
to eat your own baby?

- That's desperate.
- All right, sis. it's Sailor. C'mere.

You better not be
on that bloody bouncy ball,

eating yogurt and listening
to ghost messages.

Ah c'mere, I'm not gonna
call over at all tonight

cause I'm just so knackered,
my feet are killing me.

So, you can have dinner on your
own. Lasagna for one, is this?

All right, go on. I'll talk
to you later. Bye. I love you.

Hello, is this...

"Rose's Driving School"?

My name is Martin.

Martin Martin.

Yeah,
I remembered but...

Thanks, Bonnie.

Dad, I'm bursting for a wee
and I'm really fucking late.

- Language, Sarah!
- Fuck off, Dad!

Oh, not that one again.

Ow!

Sorry, Bonnie. I II wear it.

Stop it, Terry.

Terry, that's disgusting.

- Mm, toast. Cool shirt, Dad.
- The future of woodwork is uncertain.

What happened?

Oh. Nothing.
I hit it off a door.

It was Mom again, wasn't it?

No.

Don't lie. I can tell.

Your nose kind of twitches.

You're the world's worst liar.

I push her buttons.

Why are you still here, Mom?
What do you want?

What's wrong with you, Terry?

See? She's just trying to help.

Sarah?

- You're smoking?
- Yeah.

We can't go on like this.

If You're too scared
to do something

then I'm gonna call someone.

- Who you gonna call?
- Rose Dooley?

That psychic driving instructor
or whatever.

Those Dooleys?
That family is mad.

- You know her?
- No, but I used to see her father on telly.

Crazy fella, goin round
the place talking to ghosts.

Right, crazy father,
talks to ghosts.

Lookit, Sarah...

I don't know what I'm doing.
Half the time.

Right? Your--
Your mom is the only thing

stopping me
from messing this all up.

Dad... What if I do it wrong
and you end up

some sort of a homeless,
sex maniac?

Sleeping on the streets,
snorting hash?

Jesus, Dad! If You're not gonna call
her or do something, I'm moving out.

That's my lift.

Hello, is this...
"Rose's Driving School"?

My name is Martin.

Martin Martin.

Hello.

Hi. Rose, isn't it?

Yeah, but you know what they say,
"A rose by any other name."

Oh, sorry,
so-- So is it Rose?

Or-- "You go by another name,"
isn't it?

No, sorry, no.
It is Rose. Sorry.

It's just like a cool thing
that Roses say. But, um...

Hi, Rose here.

Sorry. Oh my God!

Bloody thing is... demented.

- Uh, hi, Rose, I'm-- I'm Martin.
- Hi. Okay, shall we get started?

Yeah.

Oh, I brought some
toasted sandwiches along.

I wasn't sure
how long we'd be.

Oh, okay.

And a couple of little juices.

Oh.

Lovely idea.

So--
Oh, and some mints.

In case of...

onions in the sandwich.

- Breaths in the car, you know?
- Nice. Good.

So, um, one thing is,
I think, uh...

You do look like a "cool dude"
with those sunglasses,

but I think for driving it might be
a bit better if you don't actually--

No, no, no! No, no.
No, I-- I need them.

They re, um...
special prescription.

All right.

Okay. So, should we get going?

Now, you have nothing at all
to worry about.

Just listen to the soothing
sound of my voice.

And we pop the key into the ignition.
Very good.

Indicate to pull out. Oh, very-- Yeah,
excellent, so-- Just flying there, Martin.

Very good.

Sometimes it's just easy
to teach, you know?

That's just fine.

You don't barely-- You barely
have to do anything.

So now this is called
parallel parking.

And You're doing
very well there.

Yeah, look behind you.
And look in front o ya.

Brilliant.

That's fantastic, Martin. I'd say
you are nearly ready for your test.

I passed my test 17 years ago.
What?

Rose, I haven't been
honest with you.

You did want your juice?

No, I didn't really come
to you for a driving lesson.

Oh my God,
You're an external examiner.

Let me just say, that thing
about the mirrors,

I was only messing,
you do need to use them.

I was gonna just do a lesson
and then pretend to my daughter

that I had asked you for help
and that you had said no-- Wait.

Asked me for help? With what?

- With my wife.
- Oh, your wife?

- She can't drive, is it?
- No, my deceased wife.

Ugh. I knew
this was going too well.

Um,
I'm a driving instructor

and you are perfectly
capable of driving,

so please exit my vehicle.
Thank you.

I knew this whole thing
was a bad idea. I'm sorry.

I'm-- I'm-- I'm--

Martin?

- Did your wife do that to your face?
- It's just a--

I, uh... it's just a bump.

Bonnie said it would be--
If I put some frozen peas on it

it'll be fine. Wait. You can
hear her when she speaks?

- Yeah. Why?
- N-Never mind.

It's just you--
You're so nice to talk to,

you-- you seem like
such a warm person.

You seem really nice as well.

And maybe you could have a chat with
my wife, you know, woman to woman?

Use your gift just to find out
what's up with her?

Mm-mm. I don't use
my Talents anymore.

I swore I would never again.
They re too dangerous.

Well, then maybe with my
daughter Sarah then, tell her--

- tell her this ghost stuff is normal?
- I said no!

Okay, I understand. I'm--
I'm sorry for bothering you.

Good-bye, Rose.

He said I'm warm.

Do ghosts have feelings?

Ghosts, like us, can be lonely.

Stuck between worlds, they
spend what little energy they have

trying to get
people's attention.

Ugh. Leave me alone.

But try as they
might, it's hard for them

to make any real impact
in our world.

Stop waving at me,
branch.

Generally,
most people tend to think ghosts

are something to be afraid of.

Really, they re all just people.

Maybe, we can help them
to move on.

These are stuck people.

Lonely people.

Ordinary people.

There's no doubt that Ireland

has its fair share of musicians.

But there are also many
who have moved here from abroad

and now call Ireland home.

♪ And I sing
La, la, la, la ♪

♪ Cosmic woman
La, la, la ♪

♪ Cosmic woman ♪

And what was it about Ireland that made
you want to move here 20 years ago?

I was seeking solitude.

Ireland is steeped
in the poetic...

Mystical. Magic.

The people are, uh...
are simpler people. Yes.

Yeah, and all the tax
exemptions, of course.

Yeah. Yes.
Yeah.

♪ Cosmic woman
La, la, la ♪

Few songs in rock history
had such instant success.

Christian shot from anonymity
to mega stardom.

Practically overnight. But that was it.

A one-hit wonder.
Christian's success was short-lived.

None of his subsequent records
even made it to the charts.

Yes.
Everyone does call him

"One-Hit Winter" and laughs
at him, et cetera.

But this new album is gonna really turn
things around, and in a couple of weeks

- we won't have to live in this shithole--
- Th-th-this is my comeback.

They say that
"The Devil is in the details,"

and with this album all the
details are just right.

In the eyes of the media

the only thing
cool about this Winter

are his bank accounts,

and reports are
they are now all frozen.

Gah! She promised me
she wouldn't mention that!

This is why I never do
interviews anymore.

Now I misspelled "Beelzebub."

Christy, darling,
the phone's ringing.

Phone. Now, Christian.
It's your manager.

Bernard, old friend!
We re in the final stages here.

It's all been surprisingly easy. I did
the incantation to summon the chosen girl

and as if by, well,
magic she arrived.

Oh, the book's power
is really quite impressive.

Yeah. Of course, after the sacrifice
I'll send you the new album.

Oh, I can't wait
to be back on top!

Yes, we'll get hit
songs and money too.

Yeah, it's all on my,
uh... my list.

No.
I don't want my legs broken.

- Again.
- Hey, you, wake up!

Oh God.

- Uh, Bernie. I-- I think I must go.
- Shit!

Yes, I need to do some ma--
mastering.

See you at the Grammys.

- C-Claudia?
- Sorry.

Oh! Oh, the virgin!

Oh, Claudia! What in God's
green undergarments did you do?

What? I woke her up
to ask her something

and she kind of exploded,
sort of fell apart.

It'll still work, yeah? I just
sacrificed her a bit early.

Blood moon is tomorrow night.
The ceremony can only happen then!

Now I shall have to procure
another virgin!

I said, sorry.

The virgin divination rod.
Have you seen it?

There's an ornate phallus
carved into one end.

Oh, the willy stick?

Ah! Darling, please be more
respectful of my things!

Seven hundred years old!

Ah!
Now, once operational

it always points
in the direction of purity.

Now let me just do a quick
incantation to turn it on.

Babe?

Babe?

Babe!

Christian!
What now, my sweet?

Uh, maybe you should wait
until You're closer to town

before you turn
your dick-rod on?

Yes. Good idea.

And that's them
leaving the church.

And that's-- that's
the flowers. Aren't they lovely?

Yeah, and...
That's the family together.

All dressed up.

Yeah, I didn't know the woman.

- It was a brilliant funeral.
- Show me?

Oh, Rose.
I didn't recognize you.

You're after putting on
some weight?

- Yeah. Thank you.
- You pregnant too?

- No.
- Non-married mother like your sis--

All right, go on so, Noreen.
That should do you for six weeks now,

no need to see you again, all right?
That's on account. Bye.

- You all right?
- Fucking fossil.

- Blow job?
- Yes.

After the day
I've had I need one.

- So, I have a date.
- What?

- The man from the butcher?
- No.

You know Brian Walsh,
the guy from the county council?

- No.
- He put the cash machine in downtown.

He's a bit dull maybe, but sure.

That's good though, you know,
cause he won't be too giddy.

Rose, is "giddy" your way
of saying "sexually active"?

I think so, yeah. Yeah.

Anyway, listen! Noreen was
just saying to me there

that Christy Burke's wife is going
to jail for that infanticide.

- Oh...
- So he's practically single
now with no kids or nothing.

I was thinking
you should call up and see him.

No... Thank you though!

But I think-- I-I think
I might've met someone maybe?

Wait. What?

I'm not sure, but this
gentleman, like, Martin...

Martin Martin. And, uh,
when we touched something,

there was something, all right?
I don't know, but...

He was only pretending that he couldn't
drive so that he could talk to me.

Oh my God. Pretending is good.
Go Martin.

- So, what did he want to talk about?
- Oh, his wife.

Like, she's dead,
but she still lives with him.

Oh, for fuck's sake.
One of them.

That's easily fixed now.
Quick ex-wife-orcism.

Sailor? You know
I can't do that.

Why, Rose?
What's the worst that can happen?

Uh, I kill him
with my supernatural powers

leaving his daughter
to face her life alone?

Fair enough. Well, like,
tell me, did you, like, kiss?

Oh my God, did anything "giddy"
happen? No. Oh my God, no.

- I thought maybe, like,
something could but...
- Yeah?

I don't know. He just... He was crying
and I told him, like, get out of my car,

and then I ate a sandwich that he
left and then I started crying too.

Wow.

You should be a sexpert
in one of those magazines, Rose.

Sailor, is that
your advice like?

All right, sorry. Well, why don't
you just get to know him a bit?

Like, see what he's into?

Likes, dislikes, that sort of thing.
Mm-hmm.

Would you call him? Oh, no, I have
a better idea actually. Stalk him.

- Stalk him?
- Rose, I do it all the time.

How do you think I found out
about Brian dumping Fiona Carberry?

I would never do that.

With you in a sec.

I'm just browsing, young lady.

So, Rose, if that is her real name,
said she doesn't do it anymore.

- Fuck's sake.
- Language.

She's refused to help? Bitch.

Don't be mean.

She seemed nice.

A bit weird maybe.
Huh?

Nice weird, I suppose.
At least she didn't think I was nuts.

It felt good to--
to talk about it.

- You know, to somebody else who understood.
- Mm.

Okay, well, it's a start.
No more excuses.

- It's me or Mom, seriously.
- All r-- O-okay.

I'll-- I'll talk to your mother.
See what I can do.

Aha! The old girl
has got something.

The fragrant aroma of purity.

I just remembered
I have a mop, thanks.

- Oh my God. Hi! Christian Winter!
- Hello.

- Oh my God. I am such a fan.
- Thank you.

- Ha...
- Yes.

Willy... Oh!

"Will he" or won't he
release a new album soon?

We will all want to know.

Cause I loved "Cosmic Woman ."

- Stunning.
- Thank you. Thank you. Yes.

But it was so long ago though.

I'd love to hear some--
Uh...

Very soon, yeah. Believe me.
Working on it... right now.

Oh, cool! Okay. Bye!

Can I help you with something?

Uh, yes, my dear.
I believe you can.

What is evil?

Well, there are those who would
use their knowledge of magic

for nefarious purposes.

Power. Fortune. Fame.

Behold this--!

Uh...

scrunchie.

Hair of the virgin.

Bonnie? You there?

Come on, love.

We need to chat.

Ugh, you.

God almighty, Bonnie!
One's not gonna kill me!

Oh, there's no need for that.

The spells they cast are not
incantations for luck

or good harvests,
but more like bargains,

struck with dark,
ancient and hungry spirits,

evil spirits whose help comes...

with a price.

Sarah!

Babe, dinner!

It's chips, beans and waffles!

Coming, my sweet!
I'm doing an incantation.

Now!

This had better work.

Or it's curtains for Christian.

Martin Martin.

Hello?

No, I'm sorry.
It is Rose, sorry.

I just had a frog
in my throat. What?

Can you slow down?
Yeah, of course I remember you.

No, I told you
I don't do that anymore--

Martin, don't do anything,
all right?

I'm on my way over now.

Why did you slaughter me, Rose?

Daddy's bag.

Bye, Mommy.

Yes, okay. Rose,
you can do this.

Just go over there.
Save the girl and...

Don't slaughter anybody again.
And then...

Yeah, fall in love,
get that guy.

And then be home in time for something
to eat. Maybe something light.

Just yogurt or something.

Hello.

Bonnie!

I'm guessing that was more
than just a gust of wind.

Yeah. Sorry.
No, it's okay.

Hi, Bonnie.
Um, my name is Rose.

Pleased to meet you. Okay.
Uh... Sarah, please. Upstairs?

Yeah.
Good.

Uh, those are bad luck.

Oh Jesus, Mary and Joseph!
Martin, she's floating!

She's floating, Martin! I know.
I told you. Rose, what is this?

I don't know. I was trying to stay
calm down at the door but I'm--

I'm in way over my head.
I better go.

Huh? No, Rose, please! Please,
I don't have anybody else to turn to.

Please. Look at her.

Yeah.
Could it be Bonnie?

I shouldn't have tried
to eat that doughnut.

I push her buttons, you know?

Yeah, but I don't think
that this is Bonnie.

I mean, why would she do this
to her own daughter?

That's true.
She never bothers Sarah.

Plus, like, with possession
there's usually more vomiting

and funny voices and masturbating
with crucifixes and...

You know, that sort of thing
anyway.

Like The Exorcist?
I never met him.

Then what is happening? Well, I do
have an idea but I really hope I'm wrong.

Hello. I'm Vincent Dooley.

This week I'm visiting
the O'Callaghan farm

in West Cork,
investigating a "gloating ."

Gloating?
Yeah. Uh, goat floating.

- Right. Obviously.
- Um, Martin?

Do you think you can kind of be,
like, calm,

and like, do you remember
that cool guy in the car?

- With sunglasses and...
- ...notice the goat is now asleep and...

Just to let you know,
this is a Satanic ritual.

Satanists? Oh my God! don't tell me
I should have had her baptized.

- This is a preparation for a virgin sacrifice.
- What?

Like, bang a goat?

Yeah, like some demons are into
that, you know, they re just...

Different strokes, but, um...Listen.

On the eve of the blood moon,
the virgin's body will float

to where the spell
was originally cast.

The blood moon. The-the weather
woman... was on about that.

It's a weird
lunar eclipse thing.

She said it was tomorrow night!
Oh...

Sarah! Wake up! Martin, no! No!
No, you can't wake her.

- Why not?
- You can never wake a floating goat.

- Watch this.
- Wake him up.

Martin! Stop!

Stop screaming! Shh. I'll help you,
okay?

I know this holding spell.

Okay? I've got some herbs.

Just be calm. Martin.

This is gonna keep her safe.
Okay?

So it's mainly rowan
and sage and...

That's a holding spell.

Do you have any fresh basil
and Tabasco?

- What do they do?
- Um...

I brought this frozen pizza, and I
was hoping you could kind of pimp it?

I'm starving.

And now, we wait.

What a shithole.

I got it.
We need ectoplasm.

It's this type of goo
that ghosts leave behind

when they move on
to the spirit world.

- Like in Ghostbusters?
- Oh, I haven't read that.

Okay, so, to break the spell we basically
have to collect the ectoplasm of seven ghosts

- and rub that into your daughter's face.
- Ugh, it's kind of--

- kind of unnecessary gross, isn't it?
- No.

It's just, like,
technical paranormal stuff.

Of course it would sound weird
to, like, a layperson.

Okay, th-that's not so bad.
We'll just go get some ectoplasm.

Martin? You know the other day you were
saying that you could hear Bonnie?

Shh.
Yeah, yes, I can. Sometimes.

Do you know that that's a really
rare gift? That's called a Talent.

- That's my talent?
- Mm-hmm.

Why couldn't I be good
at something cool like DJ-ing?

It is cool.
That was my dad's talent too.

That's how come we could
work together, you know?

He could hear ghosts,
they spoke through him,

and my Talent is basically,
like, chatting to them,

and That's what made us
such a good team.

Oh, so you were on his TV show?

Yeah... I don't like
watching those ones.

Jeepers!

Sorry, Bonnie.
Totally my fault.

- Martin...
- I put a plate in the bowl slot.

Now, where are we gonna find
a ghost to get this ecto-stuff?

Where are we gonna find a ghost?
Martin? Right.

You just have to let the ghost
inhabit your body

and I can do all the rest.
All right?

It's basically
exorcising her.

Oh.

Wait a minute. No way. Her?
Mm-hmm.

I mean it makes sense, and also,
don't you think it's time?

That's my wife
You're talking about!

- Yeah, your dead wife.
- Shh!

She hates being talked about!

And sometimes not being talked about.
She's a complicated woman.

These spirits, right? They re not
themselves. We can be helping her.

All she needs
is just like a little shove.

You are not shoving my wife.

I'm sorry. I will do anything
to help Sarah but...

killing my dead wife
is not an option.

Okay. So we're just gonna
have to start somewhere else so.

Thank you, Rose.

So, where in this little town
are we going to find seven ghosts?

Well, actually...

you might be surprised.

Hello.
Rose Dooley?

I've been calling you for weeks!

Why hasn't she
floated out? Christ!

Why are we waiting so long?
Can't we just kill the bitch?

Claudia! I'm afraid it doesn't
work that way, okay?

The sacrifice
is a trade, you see?

A covenant between myself
and the dark one.

And then?
Yes.

And then, my darling, you'll
have the riches you deserve.

You put that Subaru jeep thing
I like on the Satan list?

Wait.

Deodamnatus!

There appears to be some sort of
holding spell on the virgin.

The plot thickens.

- Can't we just kill the bitch?
- Just-- No! Okay?

They have the girl! And again,
killing the virgin is pointless!

It's a sacrifice!
We've been through this!

Don't you get snippy with me! I'm this close
with you, Christian, this fucking close!

You think
I don't understand sacrifices?

I have put up with your
tragic magic for years.

I have sacrificed
all our royalties

to get the money to buy this
fucking book. It better work!

For it to work
we must pursue them.

The blood moon
grows ever closer.

This bloody moon better make me bloody rich!

Yes.

Nervous?

Well, I mean I told you
I'm basically retired

for a really long time like,
so...

I don't know if you need
to get somebody else.

I'm actually
really very rusty.

I've been calling you for weeks!

- This must be her.
- Oh! Hi.

- Do you have a problem with a ghost, is it?
- I don't know if it's a ghost

or what, but--
You see these here?

I've had to move them
away from the house.

They re driving the dog mental.

Here. Wait till I show ya.

Holy shit!

Everything okay?
Yeah, good.

Good, thanks, how are you?
Martin, no.

I absolutely can't do this.
Like this is-- This is demented.

I'm having a full on panic attack,
I'm freaking out,

and you go now and tell her
I'm having a panic attack.

I'm just gonna try something.

- Hey! You need to get your shit together, woman!
- What?

Did you actually just put on a
"cool voice" and call me "woman"?

Yes. Yes, I did.
And I-- And I said "shit" too.

I am so sorry. I...
Oh...

I was just trying to stop you
from freaking out.

Are you still freaking out?

N-no.

Okay. Come on.

Come on!

Excuse us, Janet, we just had some technical
difficulties but they re all sorted now.

Could I ask, have you
lost anybody recently?

My Tom passed a few months ago.

- Oh. I'm so sorry.
- Well, I'm not. Prick.

Tell me this, um...
Was Tom sort of responsible

- for the rubbish and the recycling?
- Oh, yeah.

- I wonder if he has something to do with--
- You mean Tom's behind this?

Well, I can't say but...

Oh! Oh, Janet...
Tommy, do you hear me?

I put stew in the green bin
if I like!

Janet, I'm sorry. Please, there's
absolutely no need to worry.

I can take care of this. it's a very
straightforward procedure, okay?

What are they
spazzing out about?

- Give me your hand.
- Seems to be some local form of the dark arts.

It's quite surprising.
Is it?

Oh! They re so soft.

Um, thanks. Listen, Rose,

where exactly
does the ectoplasm come from?

I-it doesn't matter.
You'll see in a minute.

Now, just close your eyes, okay?

Oh, spirit on the road between life
and death, I call out to you now!

Would ye like tea or anything?

Tom Byrne, my Talent
compels you to show yourself!

Oh, restless spirit!

Enter now this vessel
I have before me!

Whenever You're ready,
please!

It's working.

Oh, Jan,
is it yourself?

- Tom! Is that you?
- It is I, my love.

- How are you?
- Christ almighty, I thought I'd never get rid of you.

Now it seems
as though I was right!

Janet, if you just let me
do the spirit talking

cause it's actually quite complicated
and technical.

Oh, who are you, my love?

- My name is Rose.
- He's three times your age.

- Would you look at yourself?
- Ow!

- Janet! No!
- Ow!

Who is this succubus?

Janet! I would actually
love that cup of tea, please?

- Dirty auld fuck.
- It's just if--

There's a green bin right there!

I don't know why you wouldn't
just recycle to the green bin!

Look at the milk going into the recycling.
That's perfect isn't it? Yeah?

Now, you don't have to worry
about that anymore, all right, pet?

Tom, give me your little hands.

Good man. Now...

Oh, restless spirit!

Untether yourself
from this world

and let the tides
carry you home!

Good job!

Very good.

Martin! We did it!

Why did it have to be
so unnecessarily gross?

We did it!

This witch must be stopped.

We must break that holding spell.

Pumpkin? I believe it's time
to face one of my biggest fears.

Ducks?

No, my darling.

Tomorrow...
I'm going to learn to drive.

Hey. Hey.

Uh, burger and chips.

Oh. Hello.

Hello, sleepy head.

You're up?

Oh, I'm sorry. I am wrecked.

Turns out taking a ghost into your
body and puking up his ectoplasm

when your daughter is under
a Satanic levitation spell

will take it out of you.
Aw.

Well, You're learning
so fast, though.

Um...

Good teacher.

Good teacher? Good partner.

Oh! Ow.

All right,
well, I'd better go in,

cause Bonnie will be
wondering where I've been.

All right. Okay.

Good night.

See you tomorrow.

Well, look who came
crawling back.

I, uh... totally forgot Sarah.

Morning.

Hello, toaster.

Long time no see, branch.

Hello, little ghost lady.

- Hello.
- Oh!

I'm sorry, I thought
you were dead!

Oh, my goodness.

So yes,
throughout this series

we have shone a light
into the darkness.

Goodness nurtures love.
Love defeats evil.

- Hm.
- Thanks Rose.

It's love that binds
the best partnerships together.

It's where true magic
comes from.

See you tomorrow, partner--

That's why I emphasize caution

- with your given Talent.
- Oh!

So if one partner
makes the slightest mistake

the other can be sucked out
into the spinning void of chaos!

Ending up stuck,
trapped or even worst:

- Nowhere at all!
- Ugh.

Lucky I have nothing
to worry about

because my Talented partner
never makes mistakes.

She's...

She's extraordinary.

Extraordinary.

I can't do this.

Hello there, Rose. This is Martin here.

Looking forward to getting up
and at em whenever You're ready.

I think we're really gonna kick some
ass today! If you'll excuse my French.

See you soon, partner. Bye-ee!

Hello, Rose Dooley,

Christian Winter,
the artist here.

I hear you are a rather
talented driving instructor.

I should like
to employ your services.

Today, noon, at my castle.
Good day.

She's extraordinary.

Daddy, no!

Hi, this is Rose. I'm on my way.

I made you a sandwich.

Thank you, my dear.

I couldn't face it right now,
but perhaps after my tutorial.

Don't be such a drama queen!
It's a driving lesson, dickhead.

Get it bloody done.
Yes, ma am.

Ah, here she comes.

So, how are you gonna find out
what she's been up to then, babe?

Just a little clever sleuthing.

It's chocolate spread,
by the way.

Hi! Hi, I'm Rose.

Oh!
Delighted.

Um, we met yesterday, actually.
Outside Bargains Galore?

Ah, yes,
in the slaughterhouse.

- No, in the shop.
- Yes. Yeah.

Memorable encounter indeed.

Yeah. So, driving.

I brought myself a snack
and some seltzer.

It's chocolate spread.
Lovely.

Now...

- Proceed.
- Okay. Now...

So, both hands on the wheel.

Right? Ah, very good.

And now you just push down
on the clutch.

With your foot. Sorry.
Use your foot.

Of course. Yes, yes, yes.

How foolish of me.

That's the accelerator,
sorry.

That's the accelerator.
No.

You're absolutely fine. So this time
push the clutch down with your foot.

Very good.

That's the accelerator
again now. No.

Okay. That's--
Yeah, that is the clutch.

Yes.
Good, but just...

Use your left foot.
Or use your other left foot.

Now! Very good. Great stuff.

Now we can just slip the car
into first gear.

Ah!

Oh my God, are you--

Christian? Are you okay?

I think I should like
to go home now, my dear.

Okay. No,
maybe you should. Yeah.

Thank you.

Perhaps this driving
is just not for me.

No.

I'm just a bad teacher.
I shouldn't be doing this either.

Oh?

Is there perhaps
some other field

in which your true talents
may lie?

No.

Well, not really. I mean...

-Kind of but actually--
-Talent is what fuels us.

What stirs our loins.

What elevates us from the beasts
and other, non-amazing people.

You'd really rather
just to have no talents at all?

Spend your life doing this?

Mm.

I'd just like everything
to be... ordinary.

So maybe I can help.
Perhaps if, uh...

May I? Come on?

♪ And I sang
La, la, la ♪

♪ Cosmic woman
La, la, la ♪

♪ My cosmic woman ♪

A little better?

Th-thank you.

And perhaps a small token
of my gratitude.

An exclusive preview
of some new material.

It's a signed copy.
Oh!

From one talented person
to another.

- Oh, That's lovely.
- In lieu of payment of course.

Oh... All right.

Well, farewell, my dear.

All right. Good-bye.

Oh, sorry, the door.
I'll get it.

World class.

I was nervous you weren't going
to come. I cook when I'm nervous.

- Oh, I eat when I'm nervous.
- We make a great team so.

Yeah...
I've got a few jars washed

and ready for the
ectoplasm tonight.

- All right.
- Okay...

I made you this earlier.
When I was restless.

Oh my God. That's fabulous.

This is gonna make a mockery
of all my other crockery.

Thank you. I'll whittle you
a spoon when all this is done.

You like garlic?
Um, not really.

So what was it
you wanted to chat about?

Bonnie, no!
Ah, its gone everywhere!

- Ah!
- Martin, can you just leave that sauce

- and listen to me just for a second?
- Yes. Uh, yes, what is it?

I really think
It's important that I tell you

what happened
to my last partner.

- Your dad?
- Mm-hmm.

We were investigating
a haunted pothole, right?

And there was this woman there with
her dog and she just had the empty lead

and the dog was inside the pothole.
And my dad said--

Some sort
of apparitional portal.

You did the right thing
calling us.

It doesn't look good,
I'm afraid.

The best we can do for, um...

- Beans.
- Beans.

Beans, here, is to be sure
he makes it to the other side.

And my dad said to me, like,
It's on you, Rose, you know?

Like it was gonna be
my turn to do it?

Now, Rose. There are
two spirits at play here.

The Pothole Spirit and Beans.

Daddy, I can't! Follow your heart,
Rose. Always trust your Talents.

And my dad went and he inhabited
the spirit of the dog.

So, he was, like,
"Woof, woof, woof!"

So Beans, the dog,
was actually in him,

and animal spirits
are always kind of tricky.

That's my Beans.
Oh, You're a good boy, Aren't you?

But you see,
the spinning pothole was in him too,

so he became half pothole,
half dog?

But I totally panicked
and I forgot the words.

Oh, weary traveler...
on the road between-- Oh...

And then Daddy freaked and went
spinning into the middle of the road.

The next thing I see a lorry
coming down the road towards him.

And the lorry driver was, like,
"Boo-boo boo-boo boo."

-And I was, like--
-Daddy, no!

And the lorry smashed Daddy.

That was it. And then
there was like a magpie

up in the tree
and the magpie was like--

You know, this kind of thing--

I don't want that to happen
to you. So That's why

I need to tell you, you need
to find yourself a new partner.

What?

I'm sorry that happened
to you but...

We don't have a choice!
The blood moon is tonight!

And anyway I don't care
if anything happens to me.

- She's my little girl.
- Yeah, but, like, I care, you know?

Because I can't go through all of
this again. I really can't, Martin.

- So I'm just gonna take my bowl and
I'm just gonna say good-bye.
- Just hang on a minute!

My daughter is about to be
deflowered with the devil

and You're telling me
you won't help?

I can't help.
What are you so afraid of?

Didn't you just hear my story?
After that and everything?

I made one tiny mistake
and my dad actually got killed.

He turned into a dog-pothole
and he got killed. So what?

- So what?
- No, I Don't-- I don't mean...

"So what?" I mean,
You're just afraid.

- I'm afraid? You're the one who's
scared of your dead wife.
- Shh.

I saw what she did to the garlic!
Do you think I'm blind?

Rose, I know
you think I'm crazy.

I don't think that You're crazy
but actually that You're scared,

because I think You're scared of what
your life will be like without her.

Yes, I'm scared!
I am afraid and I'm fine with that.

If you don't help me, Sarah is
going to die! That's... all I meant.

But this wouldn't be
making a mistake.

This would be not even trying!

♪ Satan, Satan ♪

♪ Satan, Satan ♪

♪ Satan, Satan ♪

World class.

♪ You're still on my mind ♪

♪ And even though
I manage on my own ♪

♪ My heart is low
My heart is so low ♪

♪ As only
A woman's heart can be ♪

I, um... I saw the guitar
there and, um...

And she really liked that song
when she was small.

Oh, That's just lovely, Martin.
Especially sung in a male voice.

I have it on cassette in my, um, car,
and I have it on CD at home.

Rose, I'm sorry about that.
My outburst.

No, it's okay.
Anyway, You're right.

Like--
Listen, Rose. it's okay, you...

Don't have to explain it to me.
I understand what it's like.

Well, we better go, Martin. That
ectoplasm isn't going to collect itself.

I better change my shirt.

Okay. I'll wait.

I'll wait downstairs. Sorry.

No!

- The shirt's lovely on you.
- Oh, thanks.

Oh! Where'd you get
the doughnut?

- Can I've a bit?
- N-No.

Oh, That's Sailor there. Okay.

Now, just so you know, she thinks
we re on a date tonight, so...

Why? Uh, she somehow,
like, got the impression

that we, like, got "giddy"
last night, like...

Like--

- Or like-- I don't know. It's as if like.
- Gross.

I know. That's what I-- She's demented
like. That's what I said to her.

Hi, nice dress, that was Granny's was it?
Oh, hi! You're Martin.

Yeah, hello, Sailor. "Hello, Sailor."
Oh, you heard that one before, Martin?

And yeah, it's a nickname and no,
I'm not gonna tell you my real name.

- Sailor, stop it, would ya?
- So where's this baby, then?

She's upstairs. there's no need to
check on her. I wasn't planning on it.

Do you know how long
it takes me to get up the stairs?

Yeah, just ring us
if she wakes or anything, okay?

- And don't go upstairs.
- Straightaway. Just give us a ring.

All right, chillax. Geez, you
two are gonna get on just fine.

Seriously,
Don't go upstairs.

Go on.
Thanks, girl.

What a shithole.

- You have several new messages.
- Christ.

My Nana Deirdre
is appearing to me in the kitchen.

I can't even face my Coco Pops
with her staring.

I think it looks like Hitler.
Or a turtle, maybe?

Or the Hamburglar?

No, it's definitely
my Nana Deirdre all right.

Why is she here? Watching me.

I mean, could Nana Deirdre
have a message for you?

Like, she's annoyed
about something?

I've collected a lot of money
for a sponsored walk.

There was no walk. I think she's
warning me to change my crooked ways.

Bingo. That's it. Yeah,
I'll have a quick chat with her.

Good job.

Rose Dooley?

Your help would be
greatly appreciated.

It's been weeping
constantly for two days.

I'm quite spooked, actually.

These tears are 7-Up.

It's mother! She adored 7-Up.

The chips. The chips
Won't stay in the pan.

The customers are going baloobas!
Is there anything you can do?

Well done, Martin. Good man.

Thanks a million,
lads, see you now!

It's nearly done.

We re running out of time!

I spotted him out the back,
going through me bins...

Hm. And how big
was this "wolf-man"?

Hard to say... But jeez, I wouldn't
mess with him. Out for blood he was.

Hm. And you said he had
ginger hair? Oh, definitely.

I shined a torch on him
and, uh...

H-His hair was as orange as a--

- An orange?
- Satsuma.

That kind of color, you know?
Sniffy nose and... sharp fangs!

I suppose if you were
a red-headed person,

you would become
a ginger werewolf.

Four legs and a long tail
on him too.

Mr. Daly, was it a fox?

- Oh, I'd say it was, yeah.
- All right. Good night so.

- Good luck, love. Call again soon!
- Okay. All right.

Aw, shit, me keys.

We re one short.

I can think of one more.

This place gives me the creeps.
I haven't been here in ages.

- Just down here though.
- Yeah, not since... Bonnie's funeral, actually.

That makes me feel bad. I should
probably visit her grave more often.

You know, it's just around...

here actually.

What? This was your plan
all evening to bring me here?

I'm sorry, and I think you know
what you need to do.

I-I'm a coward, Rose.
We've already established that.

Beaten down, held captive
by a dead person.

Aw...

You never asked me
how Bonnie died.

Hmm. Well...

Yeah, there never seemed
to be a good time about.

I made Bonnie a wooden clock.

And every day at the exact time
that we got married,

a little wooden me
and a little wooden Bonnie

would pop out and kiss.

- And it broke and killed her.
- Oh.

That wasn't a very good story.
It's not as good as yours.

I didn't really commit to it
in the same way.

Eight years later,
look what I've become.

Well, That's all
changed now, okay?

Because this,
this wasn't your fault.

You know what, Rose?
Since I've met you,

you've made me see
what's possible.

And I am not talking about
ghosts and spirits and all that.

You've made me realize that...

when it's time...

I can move towards the light.

Me too, Martin!

You know, I used to think
I was invisible.

Like, until this? I felt like
I was a ghost too, you know?

And it's awful, and I don't want
to feel like that anymore.

And I'm sure that Bonnie doesn't
want that anymore either, you know?

Thanks, Martin.
I've never felt this alive.

And it's because you believed
that I was real.

I know
that we are gonna do it.

- Save Sarah?
- Yeah. Obviously.

- Let's do it! Okay.
- Yeah! Let's do it.

...there is a half-empty jar
of mayonnaise of something anyway.

- Oh yeah?
- What are you--

Who's this?
How was your date?

Sailor, you have to go.
I'm sorry. What?

Yeah.
Brian, sit me up there, will ya?

Hi. I'm Brian Walsh, by the way.
Your local county council.

- Shut up, Brian. Jesus.
- She knows something's up.

Um, what the fuck was that? we're running
out of time, we have to get started now.

Wait. What's going on? I don't have time
to explain cause the eclipse is happening

in a few minutes. We have to
exorcise his dead wife, Bonnie,

or else we won't get the ectoplasm
that we need to save his daughter,

because otherwise she's
gonna be ravaged by hell demons.

- Just explained it there anyway, Rose.
- Oh, yeah.

- Right, I'll set up.
- Okay, cool.

- I'm gonna head off now.
- Shut up, Brian, will ya?

Why didn't you tell me
what was going on?

Well, cause you thought
we had a date like,

and you were so proud of me
and... I don't know, it felt nice.

I'm always proud of you.
Dickhead.

- Thanks.
- So, nothing going on then?

- No.
- Okay, all set up, Rose.

- Okay, great.
- Do you want me to stay?

- Would you?
- Yeah, help me up.

- Okay.
- Rose.

- Yeah?
- This is actually fucking deadly.

So exciting.

It's so cool You're using
your Talent again.

Brian. Now!

I seal this pact
with a drop of blood!

Now. You ready?

Oh, spirit on the road between
life and death, I call out to you!

Open now the gate so that the
living may speak with the dead.

I summon thee hence
into this realm.

Bonnie Martin,
of 25 Parkmore Drive,

my spirit compels thee
to show yourself!

Uh, Bonnie?

- Get the fock out of my house!
- Bonnie?

Sailor? Can I go home?

I see what's going on here.

You fancy my Martin.

- No.
- You just want rid of me

so you can get your
dirty paws on him!

- That's not it at all.
- Martin is mine.

Sarah is mine.

And this house is mine.

Bonnie! You loved Martin
and Martin loved you.

But do you remember
your wedding day?

Do you remember
what you told him?

- No anal?
- Ugh.

Didn't you also say to him
"Until death do us part"?

Bonnie, I'm so sorry
but it's time for you to part.

Hair of the local witch.

- Now to block her Talents!
- What's wrong?

I don't know. Someone's
interfering with my Talents.

Break the holding spell!

Look at you there!
On your knees like a right auld hoor.

A vote for me
is a vote for progress.

Rose, come on.
Trust your Talents.

You wish to be ordinary.

Allow me to grant that wish.

Bonnie Martin,
look for a safe place!

Trouble the living no more!

Leave this space and this realm.

- Oh Jesus!
- Brian!

Get a handful of that,
take those jars and run upstairs

and rub it into
his daughter's face.

- What?
- Quick, Brian!

Good man. Okay, Martin!

Wake up. Martin!

You said you were gonna
whittle me a spoon!

Oh, no, it's happening again.
Oh Martin, I'm so sorry.

Rose?
What?

Martin? Is that you?

I'm here.
You are?

- Oh my God! Gross!
- I knew it, you dirty hoor!

No. Martin?

Martin can't come
to the phone right now.

- So get the fock out of my house!
- Oh, my God.

Okay. Um, Martin, I'm just gonna
try something, okay?

Ow! Did you just slap me?

Yeah. Sorry. it's okay.
What happened?

- It kind of went wrong.
- There's no one up there.

- What?
- What? Sarah!

Sarah! Sarah!

Sarah!

- She's gone. What did you do?
- Martin? Leave her alone.

- Where is she?
- I messed up and...

she's been summoned
to the sacrifice.

Oh, no.

Martin, I'm just-- I'm so, so--

"I'm shite"? Hm? "I am a slut"?

Is that what
you were going to say?

- Um, is Martin possessed now?
- Bonnie!

No, no one talks to my sister like that!

Hello, Mr. Magpie.

I think I need your help.

- Ow!
- Lads! Stop fighting!

We need to follow this magpie!

Follow the bird.
Aye, that makes sense.

Wait! You're going too fast!

You're letting it get away.
Here, let me drive this shite bucket.

Bonnie! Ow!

Ugh! We lost him!
We lost Mr. Magpie!

Thanks for the lift
anyway, guys.

- Just drop me off here.
- Shut it, Brian, will ya?

Bonnie? Bonnie,
Sarah's being kidnapped.

What? Martin, you eejit!

- No! Leave him alone!
- How in God's name did you manage that?

- No, it's not Martin's fault!
- Of course it is. He's a thick!

That isn't true and you need
to leave him alone.

You've been holding him hostage
up in that house for years!

Himself and poor Sarah!

- Oh, I'm sorry about her.
- Wait.

Is that her?

Hold on...
She is not a baby.

It's Christian Winter. Ugh!
It's Christian Winter this whole time?

-Creepy little fucking--
-Satanist.

Ill tempest.

- The local witch.
- Yeah, I said boiled rice is fine. How long?

Okay, but if it's any later
I won't be paying.

There are more
pressing matters, my dear!

Sarah!

Martin. Martin, no!

- Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, Sarah...
- No, Martin, don't wake her!

Remember, never wake
a floating goat!

Uh, central locking please.

You un-sacrifice
my daughter right now

before I come in there and pull
those stupid bloody eyebrows off!

Refrain from shouting. You'll wake
the virgin and ruin this for everyone.

How dare you?
You little-- Ow, ow!

Jesus Christ, You're like
a pair of schoolgirls.

My fore hairs! Let go!

Oh, fuck this.

Hey! The virgin!

Zip it. I want to get home
before my Chinese arrives!

Oh my God!

Is this yours?

Ah,
my dick snottin' finger!

Everybody,
get into the fucking car!

Winter is a dead man!

Let my new age
of darkness begin.

We're almost out of time.
Anyone have any ideas?

How about we ring the bell

- and pretend we're delivering something?
- Jesus, Brian.

See? I was right.

Good man, Brian. Your
contributions are getting better.

Jesus, the Mongo
in the back was right.

Here we go.
All thanks to Brian.

Yes! High fives everyone!
Oh, sorry, high four, Bonnie.

I think it's weird you brought the bird.

Hold on, mate.
I said special fried rice, not boiled.

- Sorry, miss. The docket says boil.
- Special fried.

N-no, boiled.
Special fried.

Can you not hear me?
Are you deaf? If You're deaf

you really shouldn't
be taking phone orders.

I'll be back as soon as I can.

Fifteen minutes or it's free!

Hear me powers of the night!

The blood moon is nigh!

I offer this sacrifice
in honor of you!

Chinese is here, love.
I got it for free too.

Well, I can't wait, I'm starvo.
I'll put yours out for you though.

I offer this sacrifice
in honor of you!

Sanctify with virgin blood

and with this impure blood--
Spoon or chopsticks, darl?

Spoon or chopsticks?
Please dear!

I'm in the middle of some-- Now,

with virgin blood
and with impure blood

I pray you accept my sacrifice

or let light be ever
extinguished from my soul!

I know she's floating and
that looks really good and all,

but if the demon's just
gonna fuck her a bit

and then tear her to pieces,

why don't we just
kill the bitch?

- Which is mine?
- The kung po.

Thank you.

Good night, my sweet.

Now where was I?

Ah, yes.

- That's the door.
- Okay.

Now,
nobody be scared, okay?

Brian, I'm in labor. there's two contractions,
they re fairly close together.

Oh, shit, Sailor! Uh... Okay. You
just sit down here now. I'll tell Rose.

You will not! You'll keep your
mouth shut, do you hear me?

- There's much more important things
going on right now.
- More important?

How could it be more important?
Brian!

- Oh, sorry.
- Okay. Good man.

Just stick with me
in case I need you, okay?

Come on.

...impure blood.

I pray you accept my sacrifice

or let light be ever extinguished

- from my soul!
- Sarah! What have you done to her?

Yeah, and give me back
my scrunchie!

Can one not just sacrifice
a virgin in peace?

No! Christian, put her down!

This is over!

No, my dear.
Quite the opposite.

It's working!

No!

God, no! God, no, Sarah!

I'm back.

I'm ba-ack!

♪ Just another
Beautiful Tuesday ♪

♪ It was a moonlit night
At the castle ♪

♪ Yeah! Bang, bang, bang!
At the docks ♪

Gah! it's not working.
Why isn't it working?

Aw, I killed my wife
for this! And two virgins.

I'm going to fucking kill you,
you talentless prick!

Your daughter's life was my paintbrush.
She helped create a masterpiece.

A two-disc masterpiece
called Yester-me.

I think. Title TBC.

- Ow!
- Martin, be careful with your finger.

You fight like a girl!

- Too right, dickhead.
- Bonnie!

You killed my Sarah, you ponce!

You have
a strange fight etiquette.

- Sarah! Sarah!
- What?

Sarah.

Burger and chips.

Oh, my baby girl. Thank God.

No! Get back in there!

Get back in the hole.

I don't think this is over.

Oh, shitty shotty.

The Dark Lord!

I'm doing a small wee.

I am Astaroth.

- Hello.
- Eater of Souls.

Which one of you mortals
summoned me forth?

Oh, that'd be me, Astaroth,
my Lord and Master.

Oh, it's wonderful
to meet you finally!

Let me serenade thee!
My keyboards are just hither.

Silence!
You have broken our contract.

Now we will feast on your soul.

I sent you a virgin.

I followed instructions,
my Lord.

Did you really think
you could deceive us?

She is no virgin.

What?

What?

- Yes, she is.
- Uh-oh.

- Sarah? Is that true?
- Uh...

- My precious flower.
- Deflowered, more like, Martin.

Was it Charlie Doran?
That little fucker!

- I knew he was sniffing around.
- Who said it was a guy, anyway?

Martin. It doesn't matter, okay?
We can deal with this tomorrow.

- You are grounded, young lady!
- Stop!

I am flabbergasted.
Kids start so early these days.

Silence! The dark ones
must be satisfied.

The ritual must be completed.

Another virgin.

But I have not prepared any more
virgins! There are no more virgins!

We'll take that one.

Me? What?

Really?

No. Hardly.

Hold on. What about
Declan O Donnell?

Yeah, what about
Declan O Donnell?

Only the tip went in.

Cause the... Oh. Oh.

Tremendous news.

Now, come.

No, You're grand.
Thank you though.

Come.

Hold on!

Martin! Do something, would ya?

- I'm not strong enough!
- Oh, God.

I've seen you about the town,
you filthy beast.

Never liked you much,
you--

You damned filthy winged rat.

Just let go. there's no point in
all of us getting dragged into hell.

But I really don't want
to lose you!

- Oh my God, are you having a baby?
- I am.

Well, there is something
that you could do.

If I was no longer a virgin
I'd be safe.

-But I--
-You know, if we get "giddy."

- If we do it!
- Here like?

Well, it's better than being
gangbanged by demons in hell.

Oh, um... Oh, okay!

- You know what to do?
- I absolutely Don't.

Get the fuck down there
and figure it out.

You know, normally,
I'd do a lot more foreplay

- but we have limited time and my good finger is--
- Don't worry about it.

There's something coming out
of one of the holes!

- Is it a baby?
- Definitely not.

Do you need me to kind of, um...

Oh, I see what You're doing there.
Yeah, yeah. Oh, perfect.

- Yeah? Yeah, all right.
- Yeah.

He likes it when you cup his balls.

- Oh, hey, Bonnie.
- Just a little advice, you know? Girl to girl.

Okay.

What are they doing?

We re only doing this

so Rose won't be a virgin!

- What?
- What? And because we're madly in love!

Kiss me, you fool.

My good eye!

Rose, Really? No way.

Oh fuck!

You animals!
She must remain pure!

Sarah, stop him!

In retrospect, perhaps I
should have just killed the bitch!

Oh, thank you, Bonnie.

- That is just what I needed.
- Look after them for me, will you?

Not his balls. Martin and Sarah.

Yeah. I didn't for a second think
that you meant his balls,

and I'll definitely
mind Sarah and Martin.

- Look after his balls too.
- Uh, yeah. All right. Bye, Bonnie.

Now I can tell everybody that
my first time was a threesome.

Oh, my God.

Could that be possible
that That's there?

Or no. What?

He's so cute.

Oh my God, Sailor, like,
how did you manage to do this?

- Brian helped her.
- Ooh, congratulations, Brian.

Hi, dodie. Hallo, baba.

Rose. He's dying.

Oh my God. Martin,
we need to do it again.

Whoa, relax, Rose. I know
You're making up for last time--

No, I don't mean that. I mean--

There's a spirit in there?

I just thought
it was a sound bird.

Oh, spirit on the road between life
and death, I call out to you now.

Open up the gates so that
the living may speak to the dead.

Rose, girl. it's me.

Daddy! It really is you?

- I'm so, so sorry.
- No, Rose, you did nothing wrong.

Sure you were only a--
child.

- No, I should have saved you.
- Rose.

There's nothing
to feel guilty about.

Just look at all the people
you have just saved.

Daddy? Is it really you?

There's someone
I want you to meet.

Oh, Fanny.

Daddy, I told you
never to call me that.

Yes. Sorry, Sailor.

Look after each other,
Won't you?

Of course we will. But Daddy,
we just miss you so much.

I know Rose,
I'll always be watching you two.

Now, Rose, I'm sorry
but I must go.

Fly into the light, Daddy. Fly
towards the light, Pops. I love you.

Rose, you did it.

Martin?
He's free!

Vincent. His name is Vincent.

I think he's hungry.

There's some of Christian's
curry sauce left over there.

- Do you reckon he would eat that?
- No.

Hello?

Oh, sorry to interrupt.
I have a special fried rice here.

And some free chicken balls
to say sorry for the mix up.

Yes! I am starving.

Three months later.

- Hiya.
- Hi!

How are you?

- Well, what do you think?
- Oh, wow. That looks great!

- Yeah?
- Yeah. Lovely.

- Cool, isn't?
- Yeah. Uh...

"Extraordinary"
is one word though.

- Oh. Is that?
- It's grand.

- We'll fix it later.
- Oh, yeah?

- Th-there's something I wanted
to talk to you about.
- Oh?

- Well, you know how much
you mean to me and Sarah?
- Yeah, of course.

And the two of you like,
mean the world to me as well.

- Well...
- Oh!

Oh my God.

Whittled you this earlier.

Rose Dooley, will you marry me?

No!

♪ I woke up in the morning ♪

♪ And all the bells
Were ringing ♪

♪ My eyes could see the glory
Baby ♪

♪ Could hear
The song they re singing ♪

♪ You only get
To see the light ♪

♪ Just one time in your life ♪

♪ Oh, black magic ♪

♪ That blows your mind away ♪

♪ And takes you somewhere
That you wanna stay ♪

♪ You only get to stay one day ♪

♪ Oh, that cold black magic ♪

♪ Is there anything
More wretched ♪

♪ Than to just have caught
One sight? ♪

♪ The eyes that saw the glory
Have been ♪

♪ Have been blinded
By the light ♪

♪ And it's the true believers
That crash and burn ♪

♪ But there ain't no way
I'm ever gonna learn ♪

♪ Black magic
That blows your mind away ♪

♪ And takes you somewhere
That you wanna stay ♪

♪ Oh, you only get
To stay one day ♪

♪ Oh, that cold black magic
Ow! ♪

♪ We can't escape
We re born to die ♪

♪ But I'm gonna give it
A real good try ♪

♪ Because nothing comes close ♪

♪ And nothing can compare ♪

♪ To black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah! ♪

♪ Black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Ah, black magic
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

That's all from us.
See you next time.