All language subtitles for Letterkenny - 01x01 - Aint No Reason to Get Excited

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,799 --> 00:00:08,799 subtitle by peritta 2 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:12,399 A couple hockey players come up to the produce stand the other day... 3 00:00:21,600 --> 00:00:22,999 Bye! 4 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:25,799 Can't believe your sister's still dating these nut sacks. 5 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:27,199 - Wayne. - How're you now? 6 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:28,399 - Good and you? - Not so bad. 7 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:30,400 - Hi, Katy. - Go home, Daryl. 8 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:34,599 Nice onesie. Does it come in men's? 9 00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:36,599 Oh, I think you cum in men enough for all of us. 10 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:38,400 I think you better come in my... 11 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:40,399 I mean, you better come... 12 00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:42,999 I think you better come say that to his face, you fucking hicks! 13 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:44,999 - Nice execution. - You're doin' terrific. 14 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:46,952 Hey, I heard about your break-up, buddy. 15 00:00:46,953 --> 00:00:48,799 She was your sweetie for five years, right? 16 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:50,599 Your high school sweetie, right? 17 00:00:50,600 --> 00:00:52,599 - What's it to ya? - Heard she cheated on you, buddy. 18 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:54,199 That's a real kick in the knackers, bro. 19 00:00:54,200 --> 00:00:55,599 Just a real ouchie, bro. 20 00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:57,599 It's too bad she taught you not to fight anymore, buddy. 21 00:00:57,600 --> 00:01:00,199 'Cause that's a fight on sight for you and her new guy, buddy. 22 00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:01,276 Fourth line for life, bro. 23 00:01:01,278 --> 00:01:04,599 Maybe, if you'd ever been in a real fight, you might not be so keen for another. 24 00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:06,199 What did you say? 25 00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:07,599 You heard me. 26 00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:09,199 Hold my spitter. 27 00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:11,599 Darts off, boys. 28 00:01:11,600 --> 00:01:12,945 You looking for a tilly, buddy? 29 00:01:12,946 --> 00:01:14,936 - Let's have a donnybrook. - Pump the brakes. 30 00:01:14,937 --> 00:01:16,799 You take your shirt off, but leave your sunglasses on? 31 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:19,199 What sort of backwards fuckin' pageantry is that? 32 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,446 Do you want to fight with those shades or play pokerstars.com? 33 00:01:21,524 --> 00:01:22,599 Hold my spitter. 34 00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:24,599 Dude, I can't hold your spitter. You're holding my spitter. 35 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:26,600 - Just put the spitters down. - Tick-tock. 36 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:32,799 - Go time! - Go time! 37 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:34,399 Look at that fuckin' treasure trail. 38 00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:36,599 What's up with your fuckin' body hair, big shoots. 39 00:01:36,600 --> 00:01:38,599 You look like a 12-year-old Dutch girl. 40 00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:40,599 Your aesthetician quaff that for you? 41 00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:41,799 You can kiss my ass-thetician. 42 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:44,399 - You guys do cross fit? - You can cross-fuck-off. 43 00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:46,799 Cross fart. How many times you pulled your horn today, bud? 44 00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:48,199 - What? - Oh, she's bashful. 45 00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:50,600 Oh, come on, kitten. I won't tell anyone. 46 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:52,199 Ball park six to eight? 47 00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:54,199 - You're a fucking animal. - Play a little five on one. 48 00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:55,999 - Hit the kitchen, mix a batch. - Feed the ducks. 49 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,799 Distribute some free literature. 50 00:01:57,800 --> 00:01:58,999 Go time! 51 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:00,399 Fuckin'... Shed 'em! 52 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:04,200 Riley! Jonesy! Put your fuckin' shirts on! Get outta here! 53 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:07,599 - This isn't over! - Jinx. You owe me a Coke. 54 00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:09,600 Never buy you a Coke. 55 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:17,199 It's a hard life pickin' stones and pullin' teats 56 00:02:17,200 --> 00:02:21,002 but sure as God's got sandals it beats fightin' dudes with treasure trails. 57 00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:33,399 Hi, Katy. 58 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:34,999 We're out of yogurt. 59 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:36,599 I brought some from home. 60 00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:38,199 So why didn't you stay there and eat it. 61 00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:40,600 - Mornin' Dary. - Mornin'. 62 00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:44,123 - Thank you. - Welcome. 63 00:02:44,125 --> 00:02:45,799 So, you talked to Angie yet? 64 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:48,199 It's been almost a month now. Think you need to get back on the horse. 65 00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:51,199 She stepped out on you. Can't go back to that and get any respect. 66 00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:52,399 Not in Letterkenny. 67 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:53,799 Wayne, Angie did you a lot of good. 68 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:55,599 Somewhere along the way you kinda got soft. 69 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:56,999 You're not even fighting anymore. 70 00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:58,909 - You know what you need? - Sex. With a girl. 71 00:02:58,911 --> 00:03:00,969 Not just any girl. A good Christian girl. 72 00:03:00,971 --> 00:03:02,025 I think I can help you. 73 00:03:02,027 --> 00:03:04,088 I've been going to the Burning Bush Youth Group every Sunday. 74 00:03:04,291 --> 00:03:05,399 I think you should come with me. 75 00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:06,999 I think you should just eat your yogurt. 76 00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:08,199 There's millions of starving kids in the world. 77 00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:09,800 Yeah? Name ten. 78 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:22,199 You need a distraction. 79 00:03:22,200 --> 00:03:24,600 Something fun. Look at this. 80 00:03:27,721 --> 00:03:29,320 It's called Tinder. 81 00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:31,799 Look, see there's all these girls and if you don't like one, 82 00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:33,599 you just say nope and move onto the next. 83 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:36,999 But if you do like one, then you can see how close they are 84 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,799 and I don't know, maybe meet up 85 00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:40,104 or whatever. 86 00:03:40,106 --> 00:03:43,400 So if you like 'em you just type 'em out a message or what's the scoop? 87 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:47,000 Yeah. You just, you know, say something like... 88 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:53,400 Like, "On a scale of one to America, how free are you right now?" 89 00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,800 Oh, Jesus! Look at these nut sacks. 90 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:01,999 Why do you hate them so much? 91 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,999 'Cause hockey players would grab a monkey by the tit if they could. 92 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:07,399 Smokes are for jokes, bud! 93 00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:08,999 Put it out before it puts you out, bud! 94 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,200 Trash the ash, pal! 95 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:17,199 Ouch! Put it out! Put it out! 96 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:19,600 Put it out! Put it out! 97 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,399 Tell the fish hook story, Dan. 98 00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:24,399 It's really more of a Wayne story. 99 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:25,599 Yeah, but he won't tell it. 100 00:04:25,600 --> 00:04:27,599 Oh, you've heard it a baker's dozen times. 101 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:28,999 Tell the story or he won't shut up. 102 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:30,799 Is there anymore trail mix? 103 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:31,799 It's in the house. 104 00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:33,999 Yous makes the most delicious trail mix, Katy, 105 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,999 and I got to say that's what I appreciates about you. 106 00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:38,799 Is that what you appreciate about me? 107 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:40,399 Pitter-patter, squirrely Dan. 108 00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:42,599 So, as the story goes, 109 00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:44,999 Wayne hucks an egg at a truck with a Confederate flag 110 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:46,399 in the back windshield 111 00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:47,799 and the driver's fumin' pissed. 112 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:50,799 So, we flee the scene goin' full tilt like a Peterbilt, right? 113 00:04:50,800 --> 00:04:54,199 Now, The Federales catch up to us and chase us through a few backyards 114 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:56,399 before we scamper up into some trees 115 00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:59,399 and all Wayne's got on is a pair of cut-off jean shorts 116 00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:02,599 so he ain't exactly super jazzed about the situation, was you Wayne? 117 00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:04,399 Oh, I'm no DJ Jazzy Jeff. 118 00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:05,999 The Federale pulls out his Taser, 119 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:10,399 and he points it up at Wayne and says some real Clint Eastwood-sounding shit. 120 00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:11,999 He says to Wayne, he says, 121 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:15,799 "If I'd known I was going to run into some uptown street toughs today, 122 00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:17,542 "I'd have done up my top button." 123 00:05:17,544 --> 00:05:19,599 That's from a John Wayne motion picture. 124 00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:20,799 No, Cool Hand Luke. 125 00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:22,799 Pert near anything Kevin Costner, really. 126 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:26,399 Either way, I's impressed and I'd let out an audible gasp 127 00:05:26,400 --> 00:05:30,599 so he hears me, spins around, aims the Taser up at me and lets fire, 128 00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:33,125 and if that thing doesn't latch onto my nipple ring, 129 00:05:33,127 --> 00:05:35,399 which I'm pretty sure amplified the electric current, 130 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:37,199 he sent coursing through my entire body. 131 00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:39,599 And they just walked over and yanked that thing out of my nipple 132 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:41,199 like it was a goddamn fish hook. 133 00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:42,999 At least that's according to my cousin. 134 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,599 Well, you know, my second cousin. 135 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:46,399 - Who, Garrett? - No, Jarrett. 136 00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:47,999 - Huh... - I cried. 137 00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:49,799 I'm not even ashamed to admit that. 138 00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:53,399 That was well brought up. Too bad you weren't. 139 00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:55,200 I should say. 140 00:05:55,400 --> 00:05:56,999 Thirsty Thursdays, boys. 141 00:05:57,000 --> 00:06:00,000 Might as well get balls deep in a bottle of Gus'n Bru tonight. 142 00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:03,999 It's a four leaf clover. Make a wish. 143 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:06,199 Wish you weren't so fucking awkward, bud. 144 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,199 Is Angie working? 145 00:06:12,200 --> 00:06:14,200 Better have a peek-see, Wayne. 146 00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:20,799 - How are yous? - Not too bad. 147 00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:23,799 - Good. And you? - Not too bad. 148 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,199 Smells like someone's in their barn clothes. 149 00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:27,215 It's Dary. 150 00:06:27,216 --> 00:06:28,979 Four shots of Gus'n Bru, please and thank you, 151 00:06:28,981 --> 00:06:30,089 One for you, too, Gailor. 152 00:06:30,091 --> 00:06:32,399 Thank you, Wayne, but I'm off the sauce. 153 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,799 Taking eight vitamins a day now. 154 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:37,399 - What are you taking? - I'm taking multi-vitamin, 155 00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:40,199 fish oil, vitamin C, vitamin D, 156 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:43,399 two vitamin B complexes and two Cold-FX's. 157 00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:44,776 Yeah, but 'cept how many darts though? 158 00:06:44,778 --> 00:06:45,862 Twenty, 25 darts. 159 00:06:45,864 --> 00:06:46,918 Oh, you got 'er down then? 160 00:06:46,919 --> 00:06:48,752 Last I seen ya, you were on a pack and half of smokes. 161 00:06:48,754 --> 00:06:50,399 Well, sometimes, I'll have a pack and a half of smokes, 162 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:51,907 but never more than two packs of smokes. 163 00:06:51,909 --> 00:06:52,939 Good enough. 164 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:58,400 All right. Won't be rude. 165 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:00,999 I'd hang a piss. 166 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,399 Oh, fuck. 167 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:05,200 I'm about to give birth to a pound of fudge. 168 00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:11,312 Wayne. 169 00:07:11,314 --> 00:07:12,445 McMurray. How 're ya now? 170 00:07:12,447 --> 00:07:13,799 - Good 'n you? - Not so bad. 171 00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:16,999 Seen Angie, with her new dude? What a fuckin' dandy. 172 00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:19,999 Yeah. He's got fugazi-diamonds in both ears 173 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,399 and leprechaun buckles on his shoes. 174 00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:24,199 Running a fuckin' Dippity-Doo convention upstairs for a salad. 175 00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:27,599 Driving a '94 Jeep YJ with a wave decal on the side. 176 00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:29,599 Enough cologne to offend a Bangkok lady boy. 177 00:07:29,600 --> 00:07:30,600 Good enough. 178 00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:37,599 This must be where the dicks hang out, eh? 179 00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:38,999 Our dicks hang out. 180 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:40,799 Yours is like a mushroom in a corn field. 181 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:42,800 Mind your fuckin' business, Alexander. 182 00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:47,599 Seen Angie with her new dude? What a fuckin' dandy. 183 00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:49,399 Eyes on your own work there, super chief. 184 00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:59,399 Thank Christ, Wayne, I'm pushing clobs here. 185 00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:02,799 Get outta the way, I'm growing a tail. 186 00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:05,399 Wayne, I would like to cordially invite you to the Burning Bush Youth Group 187 00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:07,310 this Sunday, for an evening of song and praise. 188 00:08:07,312 --> 00:08:08,381 Hard no. 189 00:08:08,382 --> 00:08:10,382 My sweetie, Margaret, is a first class gal. 190 00:08:10,631 --> 00:08:12,701 She's got some friend she introduce you to. 191 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:14,399 You're a pervert, Daryl. 192 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,999 Jesus, your breath could stop a Mack truck right now. 193 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:18,600 All right, cool it. 194 00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:21,599 What say, we go for a quick ice run, Wayne? 195 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:24,199 I'm pushing up on you for years now. 196 00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:26,999 What's say you give old Gailor one for the scrapbook? 197 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:28,600 Huh? 198 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:35,999 I'll do the Youth Group. 199 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,399 All right. 200 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:40,199 Gail, looks like the John's allergic to fudge. 201 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:42,399 Bring the plunger, we may have to break this one up. 202 00:08:42,400 --> 00:08:44,999 Told you to flush as you go. Fuck. 203 00:08:57,400 --> 00:09:00,199 Hi, Daryl. Christ be with you. 204 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:01,799 Margaret. 205 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:03,599 - And you must be Wayne. - Mmm-hmm. 206 00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,199 - Christ be with you, Wayne. - Hello. 207 00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:07,399 How are yous? 208 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:08,999 - Oh, not s'bad. - Good 'n you? 209 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:10,800 Perfect. 210 00:09:11,325 --> 00:09:13,200 You made a good choice coming here, tonight. 211 00:09:13,380 --> 00:09:14,580 Yeah? Why is that? 212 00:09:16,474 --> 00:09:19,398 Hold your finger here for as long as you can. 213 00:09:19,759 --> 00:09:21,159 What for... 214 00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:27,399 - All right. - Now imagine, 215 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:29,999 your soul engulfed in that for all of eternity. 216 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:31,600 Okay. 217 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:36,999 God is good. 218 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,800 That's how they get you. 219 00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:41,999 Wayne's been going through a bit of a rough break up, 220 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,799 and I thought a night at the Burning Bush might help him out. 221 00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:46,600 Plus, it's better than spending all his time on Tinder. 222 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:48,262 Tinder? 223 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,399 Did you know that it was originally called Grindr 224 00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:54,000 and that it was made for gay men to sodomize each other? 225 00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:57,799 - No. - Yeah. 226 00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,600 Good way to get a finger in your bum. 227 00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:02,000 Or a tongue in your bum. 228 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:04,400 Do you know what Dick Dingers are? 229 00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:06,799 No. 230 00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:09,399 It's when they snort drugs off of each other's erect penises. 231 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:11,199 That have just been in bums. 232 00:10:11,200 --> 00:10:14,799 Oh, my gourd! Look at this turnout. 233 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:15,855 Hi, everybody. 234 00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:19,799 Quick question for all y'all. 235 00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:21,218 How good is God? 236 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:26,999 I know, I know, I love him. He's the best. 237 00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:30,399 Second question, has anyone seen... 238 00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:32,599 Where is my beautiful girlfriend, Virginia? 239 00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:34,199 Ginny, where are you? 240 00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:36,199 There she is, Ginny, come on up here. Come up, Ginny. 241 00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:39,599 Oh, ugh, Ginny. 242 00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:41,599 Ginny, Ginny, Ginny. Hmm. 243 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,999 I still remember, like it was yesterday, 244 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:47,399 the day that the Lord gave you to me. 245 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:49,599 And he said, "Glen, 246 00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:53,399 "this is your blank canvas, it is pale. 247 00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:55,999 "It is colorless, it is almost cardboard-like. 248 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,599 "I want you 249 00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:00,399 "to give it life, to give it color." 250 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:01,599 And so I said to the Lord, 251 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:04,400 "I will give it everything, everything. 252 00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:06,399 "Except for one thing." 253 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:09,399 What was that question? Uh, hmm? 254 00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:10,999 Vaginal intercourse! 255 00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:15,799 Guess what, boys and girls? 256 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:19,199 You're in for somethin' special, 'cause we got The Salty Treats. 257 00:11:28,800 --> 00:11:31,399 What the actual fuck is this place? 258 00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:33,399 Why can't you just enjoy yourself? 259 00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:34,799 It's 'cause I get onto this Tinder thing, 260 00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:37,599 and now they tell me it's for finding dudes. 261 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:39,799 But that's some bullshit, right? 262 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:41,599 - I don't know. - You want some strawberry lemonade? 263 00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:44,999 I haven't seen this sort of fuckin' bedlam since we fired Roman Candles 264 00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:48,599 at coyotes that night and caught one right in the butt hole, fuck. 265 00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:51,599 Ran up the back porch, dropped seven shades of shit in Dad's work boots. 266 00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:53,399 Could have been a wolf. There's wolf's in the back bush. 267 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:54,799 There's for sure mooses. 268 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,000 - Have a dart. - Yeah, I'd have a dart. 269 00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:11,800 Oh, fuckin' Grindr. 270 00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:13,399 Grindr? 271 00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:15,599 - Grindr. - What? 272 00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:16,799 Pray tell, what are you doing on Grindr, Wayne? 273 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:19,799 What are you skids doing out of your parents' basement, Stewart? 274 00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:21,199 The gang and I have been doing hip-hop karaoke 275 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:22,999 for the better part of 48 hours. Out on the decks. 276 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:24,799 - Ones and twos. - The entire 48. 277 00:12:24,800 --> 00:12:26,199 Subsequently spittin' hot fire. 278 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:27,999 Playing Mega-Man and Final Fantasy on original NES. 279 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:29,199 Pokemon Gold, on GameBoy Color. 280 00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:30,999 - Gotta catch 'em all. - Bulbasaur, Ivysaur, Venusaur, 281 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,503 Charmeleon, Charizard, fuckin' Charmander. 282 00:12:32,505 --> 00:12:34,199 Fuckin' Charmander. 283 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,649 Time to take about 20% off on the meth intake, boys 284 00:12:36,656 --> 00:12:38,455 Lion King was far ahead of its time. 285 00:12:38,456 --> 00:12:40,255 Makes you think far beyond your years. 286 00:12:40,256 --> 00:12:41,655 Disney games prevail! 287 00:12:41,656 --> 00:12:43,255 You got any weed? 288 00:12:43,256 --> 00:12:46,194 I always regret coming to the surface with you, day-walking hicks. 289 00:12:46,196 --> 00:12:47,975 The minutiae of your world. 290 00:12:47,977 --> 00:12:50,855 My basement resembles an island Xanadu, in comparison. 291 00:12:50,856 --> 00:12:52,055 - Okay. - Ah, but some quick math 292 00:12:52,056 --> 00:12:54,255 tells me this time, however, 293 00:12:54,256 --> 00:12:57,455 you've been so agonized by a woman you're now seeking the company of men. 294 00:12:58,656 --> 00:13:00,055 Oh, okay. We've all thought about it. 295 00:13:00,056 --> 00:13:02,055 Well, good on you for doubling down. 296 00:13:02,056 --> 00:13:04,855 Although, I didn't peg you for a pipe fitter, Wayne. 297 00:13:04,856 --> 00:13:05,978 Pegged! 298 00:13:05,979 --> 00:13:08,157 Five years with Andie, we figured you were a concrete clam slammer. 299 00:13:08,159 --> 00:13:10,255 Why drink from the furry cup when the garden hose is right there? 300 00:13:10,256 --> 00:13:11,455 Who knew he liked the chutney ferret, eh fellas? 301 00:13:13,656 --> 00:13:15,055 Fuckin' what? 302 00:13:15,056 --> 00:13:16,158 - Knob jockey. - Back door bandit. 303 00:13:16,160 --> 00:13:18,003 I'm gay, but donut puncher! 304 00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:21,455 - Just gimme my phone. - Oh, yeah, sure thing. 305 00:13:21,456 --> 00:13:22,855 - Oklahomo. - Rear admiral. 306 00:13:22,856 --> 00:13:24,855 - Uphill gardener. - Bum bumper. 307 00:13:24,856 --> 00:13:26,655 This is awkward for me, you guys. 308 00:13:26,656 --> 00:13:28,055 Hey, it's okay. 309 00:13:28,056 --> 00:13:30,655 We know, and we support you. 310 00:13:30,656 --> 00:13:32,655 All right. Donald Trump of rump! 311 00:13:36,656 --> 00:13:38,159 - Phone. - Okay. 312 00:13:38,161 --> 00:13:40,760 But only because you have this weird... 313 00:13:42,056 --> 00:13:43,855 - Menergy... - Menergy! 314 00:13:43,856 --> 00:13:47,056 - About you. - Sorry. 315 00:13:49,656 --> 00:13:51,855 That's a great name for a spa. 316 00:14:04,656 --> 00:14:07,656 Oh, stop it. You know I love ripping didge. 317 00:14:33,256 --> 00:14:36,255 If you don't change your attitude you're gonna lose out on all the girls. 318 00:14:36,256 --> 00:14:39,055 Like the 12-year-olds or the 13-year-olds? 319 00:14:39,056 --> 00:14:41,856 Well, have you noticed all the well-groomed dudes here? 320 00:14:42,856 --> 00:14:44,255 You missed the best part. 321 00:14:44,256 --> 00:14:47,255 Glen just did his didgeridoo solo. 322 00:14:47,256 --> 00:14:49,255 Well, that's pretty much it. 323 00:14:49,256 --> 00:14:50,655 You guys wanna get some milk shakes? 324 00:14:50,656 --> 00:14:53,056 - I think Modeans is open. - Boy, howdy. 325 00:14:53,530 --> 00:14:55,129 Well, well, well... 326 00:14:55,131 --> 00:14:58,530 Daryl, girl, Wayne. 327 00:14:58,656 --> 00:15:01,855 Bit surprised to see you here, I'm being honest. 328 00:15:01,856 --> 00:15:05,056 Didn't realize you were big fan of the didge. 329 00:15:06,456 --> 00:15:09,256 Aw. More of a didgere-don't? 330 00:15:20,256 --> 00:15:22,055 What do you do with the fertile, Wayne? 331 00:15:22,056 --> 00:15:24,455 Didn't I just catch you cruisin' Grindr? 332 00:15:24,456 --> 00:15:25,728 Come again? 333 00:15:25,730 --> 00:15:27,455 Hey, shouldn't you boys be watching Friday Night Lights 334 00:15:27,456 --> 00:15:28,855 with a gym sock on your joy stick? 335 00:15:28,856 --> 00:15:30,455 Chirp Tim Riggins. I fuckin' dare you. 336 00:15:30,456 --> 00:15:32,655 Mix in a little One Tree Hill and maybe some Gossip Girl. 337 00:15:32,656 --> 00:15:35,055 But I think we've got bigger fish to fry right here. 338 00:15:35,056 --> 00:15:38,059 Looking for love over the rainbow now, are we Dorothy? 339 00:15:38,061 --> 00:15:39,259 I hate you, 340 00:15:39,456 --> 00:15:41,655 but can confirm deer season's over. 341 00:15:41,656 --> 00:15:43,255 He's hunting bear now. 342 00:15:44,456 --> 00:15:48,055 I fuckin' hate you too. However, fuckin' hate him more. 343 00:15:48,056 --> 00:15:50,056 And I just found out he's ambidextrous. 344 00:15:50,095 --> 00:15:51,655 What are they talking about, Wayne? 345 00:15:51,656 --> 00:15:52,855 He likes dicks now. 346 00:15:52,856 --> 00:15:54,255 In his bum. Or his mouth. 347 00:15:54,256 --> 00:15:55,455 All over. 348 00:15:55,456 --> 00:15:57,255 Oh, my God. That's Angie's new boyfriend? 349 00:15:57,256 --> 00:15:59,056 Oh, that's that city boy. 350 00:16:03,457 --> 00:16:04,854 What a skirt. 351 00:16:04,856 --> 00:16:06,856 What a shit. 352 00:16:11,256 --> 00:16:13,655 Fuck, Lemony Snicket, what a series of unfortunate events 353 00:16:13,656 --> 00:16:15,655 you fuckin' been through, you ugly fuck. 354 00:16:15,656 --> 00:16:17,233 Boulevard of Broken Dreams. 355 00:16:17,235 --> 00:16:20,255 - Fuck you, Stewart. - Hey, fuck you... 356 00:16:20,256 --> 00:16:22,256 Yeah, fuck yourself. 357 00:16:42,968 --> 00:16:45,368 You must be having a fun night. 358 00:16:46,256 --> 00:16:48,167 "Ur bro is gay. 359 00:16:48,169 --> 00:16:51,569 "LMFAO." In all caps, from Riley. 360 00:16:53,856 --> 00:16:57,055 Wayne? You remember when you were 19, 361 00:16:57,056 --> 00:17:00,855 those worm pickers kept coming in the night and trampling on our beans? 362 00:17:00,856 --> 00:17:02,360 What did you do? 363 00:17:02,362 --> 00:17:04,760 Dug six foot holes, put a skunk in each one 364 00:17:04,762 --> 00:17:06,761 and waited for them to fall in. 365 00:17:06,763 --> 00:17:10,558 Remember when the skids egged Daryl on his bike? What did you do? 366 00:17:10,931 --> 00:17:14,731 Put some stink bombs in a Nerf gun and fired it at them on prom night. 367 00:17:15,856 --> 00:17:18,255 Remember when you came in from chorin' and found those messages 368 00:17:18,256 --> 00:17:20,471 on my computer from a guy cal ling me a slut? 369 00:17:20,473 --> 00:17:22,655 I wanted a piece of that guy for a long time. 370 00:17:22,656 --> 00:17:26,456 You drove over to his house and broke his nose on his front lawn. 371 00:17:28,856 --> 00:17:31,455 You know, I miss that Wayne. 372 00:17:31,456 --> 00:17:32,597 I think a lot of people do. 373 00:17:32,599 --> 00:17:34,399 It's for the better. 374 00:17:57,656 --> 00:18:00,656 This is Sparta! 375 00:18:09,656 --> 00:18:11,164 Ow! Fuck! 376 00:18:11,956 --> 00:18:13,086 What the hell are you doing? 377 00:18:13,088 --> 00:18:15,111 I'd ask you the same thing, you fuckin' tit. 378 00:18:15,113 --> 00:18:18,455 I'm taping an idiot. I'm not sneaking up on dudes and starting fights. 379 00:18:18,456 --> 00:18:20,255 I'm not fightin' ya. I'm smackin' ya. 380 00:18:20,256 --> 00:18:23,580 Oh, that's right. You don't fight anymore, do you? 381 00:18:23,582 --> 00:18:26,813 I figured I'd have one on deck for sure after I stole your girl. 382 00:18:28,931 --> 00:18:30,730 Nothin', eh? 383 00:18:30,732 --> 00:18:32,368 No move? 384 00:18:32,370 --> 00:18:34,569 She must've trained you well. 385 00:18:34,571 --> 00:18:37,370 So what's it gonna take to get you back on the horse there, champ? 386 00:18:37,523 --> 00:18:40,723 Do I go inside and spread Angie right out on the bar when she gets here? 387 00:18:41,456 --> 00:18:44,456 I've fucked your girl more times than you've had a hot meal. 388 00:18:45,361 --> 00:18:47,161 Maybe your sister wants to join us. 389 00:18:47,856 --> 00:18:50,014 It's Katy, right? Shit. 390 00:18:50,016 --> 00:18:51,814 Why don't I go over there and ask her myself? 391 00:19:02,115 --> 00:19:04,115 Pull your pants up, Alexander. 392 00:19:10,856 --> 00:19:12,856 You've come this far. 393 00:19:52,997 --> 00:19:55,397 Welcome to fuckin' Letterkenny. 394 00:20:22,362 --> 00:20:24,162 Good to have you back, big brother. 395 00:20:25,256 --> 00:20:27,255 - Hi, Katy - KATY: Go home, Daryl. 396 00:20:31,856 --> 00:20:33,860 - Bye, Wayne. Have a good one bro. - Bye, Wayne. 397 00:20:33,862 --> 00:20:35,462 See you later, buddy. 398 00:20:35,463 --> 00:20:37,463 subtitle by peritta 30561

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