All language subtitles for Home Improvement - 317 - Room For Change

If you're like me,

you've spent time on the floor
after an accident...

waiting for the paramedics
to arrive.

It's times like these a lot of
thoughts roll through your head.

"I wonder
if the bleeding will stop."

"I had no idea electricity could
lift me off the ground that high."

Or, "From this angle,

that smooth ceiling
could use a little texture."

And how would we do that, Al?

Well, Tim, with Binford's 6100
acoustic spraying system.

That's right.

With the 6100 system, even the most
inexperienced, unskilled homeowner

can do this simple job.

And who better to demonstrate
than you, Tim?

For this job,

Al and I suggest Binford's
Acoustical Texture Spray.

That's right. It comes
in these ready-to-mix bags.

All you do is add water.

Or, for a creamier texture,
go with the buttermilk.

Obviously you want to follow
the instructions precisely,

because too much water,

and your mixture will not
adhere to your ceiling.

Tim, I've already mixed that.

Yeah... Just needs
a bit more water, Al.

I used a measuring cup.

We're not doing laundry, fella.

I use a measuring system
that never fails me - my eye.

My eye.

Once you've mixed the compound,

it's ready
to load in the hopper.

Give me a hand, Dennis.

Perfecto. All right.

When you get going,

what you do
is use short even strokes,

keeping the gun
about 2 feet from your ceiling.

All right.

AmericasCardroom.com brings poker back
Million Dollar Sunday Tournament every Sunday

And you doubted me.

I stand corrected.

I would be proud
to have a ceiling like this

in my living room.

Who let those pigeons in here?

What do you think? Should we
put the kids in the middle?

No, Ashley, there's nothing going
on between me and Melissa.

I just gave her a taste
of my Jell-O.

It's not like we both chewed
the same piece of gum.

Ashley, come on. Hold on.

Randy, I'm on the phone.
Get out.

You get out. It's my room, too.

I was here first.

Look, I'm just getting my books.

I'm listening.

I swear, there's nothing going
on between me and Melissa.

Oh, Brad,
get off the phone and kiss me.

Mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah.

No, that's not Melissa.
It's my stupid brother.

Listen, Ashley,

there's nothing going on
between us.

Uh-huh.

Hold me, my hunka hunka
burning love.

Ashley, I'll see you at school.

All right. Bye.

You're a hunka dead meat!

I'm gonna kill you!

But I thought you loved me.

Stop, stop, stop!

Guys, stop it. What's going on?

He keeps bugging me
when I'm on the phone.

He's on the phone
24 hours a day.

Don't use the phone so much.

I can't help it
if I'm so popular.

Well, I guess that's why
all us girls love you.

Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Bradley, Bradley!

- Come here. Come here.
- What?

Take your coat, take your bag,
and you go out that way.

Well, this is what
we're leaving the world.

Face it, honey.

You raised two very
obnoxious little boys.

What is going on with them?

They've really been going at
it these last couple of weeks.

You're right.

Black eye, bloody nose,
stitches, loose tooth.

Well, we gotta do something
before they kill each other.

Tonight, after they're asleep,

you and me, Puerto Rico.

Tim, this is serious.

We've got to find out
what's wrong with them.

- All right.
- Then we go to Puerto Rico.

If we wanna solve this problem,

there's only one thing
to do - separate bedrooms.

We don't have any more bedrooms.
And, no, no, no, no, no, no!

You're not building any more.

Honey, we've talked
about this before.

Move Brad into Mark's room,
and then Mark into Randy's room.

No. No. OK, Brad is older. He
probably should have his own room.

But we can't make
a decision like that

without discussing it
with all the boys.

Why discuss it?

The reason we became parents is
so we could tell kids what to do.

If we can't do that,

we're just the tallest people
living here.

You sound like my father.

All right.

Today, we're gonna show you

how to soundproof
as well as insulate the walls.

Now, there's a variety of
products you can use, of course.

Acoustic padding,
fiberglass batting,

or very unattractive flannel.

The easiest way
to install your insulation

is during construction, before
you've put up your dry wall.

However, if the dry wall's already
been installed in your home,

we suggest
the foam injection method.

Heidi, the foam injector,
please.

Here you go, Tim.

- Thank you, Heidi.
- You're welcome.

For this method, you're gonna
have to drill some holes.

But first you wanna find a stud.

I said "stud," not "dud."

It's already compressed air
in there.

To make it work, stick your nozzle
in, and you start insulating.

Mm-hmm. It should dry in about ten minutes.

That's right, Al.

Now, to show some of the
advantage of soundproofing,

the crew and I got here early
and constructed a special room.

Heidi, my room, please.

Now, this room will not only
protect you from the elements,

keep you warm,

but it's also
totally soundproof.

- Here you go, Tim.
- Thank you, Heidi.

Watch this, Al.

Can't hear a word.
It's so good. Watch.

Talking like this.

You walk in. Hi, everybody.
My name's Tim "The Tool..."

Aah!

That is truly amazing.
We did not hear a sound.

No. That's how it was designed.
You gotta try it.

Let yourself go. It's great.
Yeah.

Tim, can you hear me?

You can't hear me?

In that case, I should be
the host of this show.

And another thing. That's a
stupid haircut you have.

And another thing...

- Al.
- Yes?

- Al.
- Yes?

Can you hear me?

I can hear you.

Think about that.

Major General Borland!

Come on, Brad. Let me in.

No! You're gonna be out there
for the rest of your life.

Well, there's no lock. You're gonna
have to stand next to the door

for the rest of your life.

Maybe I will.

Good plan, genius.

I got a better plan.

Open this door right now, Brad.
Come on.

Why are you keeping him out of the room?

Because, he keeps bugging me.

- You're full of it.
- You're the one who's full of it.

Stop, stop, stop, stop!

Sit down. Both of you, sit.

Your mom wants to know
what's going on between you two.

She's not here,
so it's up to me.

Randy, what's the matter
with Brad?

- I hate him.
- You don't hate him.

Turn around and talk to me.
What's the problem with Brad?

I hate him a lot.

Not as much as I hate him.

He won't let me
into my own room.

I can't even do my homework.

- It's not just your room.
- You think you own it.

Well, he doesn't own it.
I own it.

Actually, the bank
kind of really owns it...

Guys, you gotta figure out a way

to work this out by yourselves,
all right?

Randy shouldn't
even have a room.

He should be at the bottom of
Lake Erie with the other shrimp.

Brad!

Yeah, and you'd
fit right in on Mars,

where there's no sign
of intelligent life.

First of all...
they've never confirmed that.

And second of all,

I want you guys
to shake hands and make up.

Big brother, help little brother out.
Come on.

Did you hear what I said?

Shake hands, right this minute.
Come on, hop to it.

All right. Good men.

Quit squeezing!

You're the one who's squeezing.

- Come on, let go.
- You let go.

Both let go. Let him go. Let...
All right, let go!

All right, down here.

Tried it your mom's way, that didn't work.
Now it's my way.

- I'm splitting you guys up.
- What?

I'm moving him into Mark's room,
and Mark's in with you.

Wait a second!
This is totally unfair.

Why should Brad
get his own room?

Because he's the oldest and
because I say so, all right?

- I have to go with Dad on this one.
- Don't push it.

This is totally unfair.

Well, life is totally unfair.

When I was your age, I wanted my
own room, and I didn't get it.

Come to think of it,
I still don't have my own room.

Got a box.

Dad, I don't wanna
move in with Randy.

Oh... Mark, it may seem
like a bad idea now,

but a lot of times bad things
turn into good things.

What could be good about
sharing a room with Randy?

I've been thinking about it. Maybe you and
Randy will get to know each other better.

When I was your age,
I moved in with Steve.

You know Uncle Steve and I
don't get along.

When we moved in together,
we got real close.

After that, he didn't
beat me up so much.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- I guess that could be a good thing.
- Yeah.

And maybe you and Randy
can gang up against Brad.

- Yeah.
- All right.

- Thanks, Dad.
- You bet.

- Hi, Mom.
- Hi, honey.

- What are you doing with that box?
- Dad's making me move.

What?

To Randy's room. Now I
get to beat up on Brad.

Tim!

Was that you, honey?
I could hardly hear you.

They had a whole bunch
of chamois on sale.

How could you?

You said always look
for bargains.

I mean about switching
the boys' rooms.

Oh. I tried it your way.
It didn't work.

My way was that we told them.
Was I not clear?

We, we, we.

It can be taken so many ways.

To you, it meant "us."
To the French, it means "yes."

To this little piggy, it meant,
"I'm going all the way home."

I can't believe you made a
decision like this without me.

If you'd been in the room arguing with
them, you'd have made the same decision.

No, I would have discussed it with the
boys, waited for you to come home,

and we could have discussed it
as a family.

And after all the discussion, the
boys would have been, what, 90?

Great. Make jokes.

- OK. A crocodile and a giraffe...
- Tim...

Honey, I don't need endless
discussions to make a decision.

Men assess a situation,
boom - done.

Are you saying that men
are more decisive than women?

Oh, it's a fact.

Come on. We don't shop for three
hours for shoes and handbags.

The first pair of shoes
I see that fit, I buy 'em.

- Even if they're sling-back heels?
- If they fit.

You see? Just because men
make hasty decisions

doesn't mean
that they're the right ones.

Men aren't yammerers.

Is that what you think?
You think that I yammer?

Jill, you're a yammer-er.

Well, you're a yack-ass!

Evening, Wilson.

Heavenly-ho, good neighbor.

What are you doing?

Tim, I am shooting the moon.

Aren't you supposed to have
your pants down for that?

No, no, no, no, no, Tim.
I'm taking time-lapse photographs.

I'm tracking the path
of the blue moon.

I'm taking
some very spectacular shots.

That's funny. Jill just took
some spectacular shots at me.

Something's out of orbit
in the Taylor universe.

I suppose you could say that.

I made a big decision
without asking her.

I wanted to stop the boys
from fighting,

so I put them
in separate bedrooms.

Mm-mm-mm. Well, that's a tough
decision to make unilaterally.

Yeah. Jill figured I should
have made it double-laterally.

She used that word?

No. No, she doesn't have
a big vocabulary

like you and me.

I thought if I separated them, it
would stop them from fighting.

Oh, I see. Well, Tim, what
were they fighting about?

They're boys. They fight about everything.
What does it matter?

Well, Tim, what you're
describing to me

brings to mind
the verruca vulgaris.

- Uhh?
- Also known as the common wart.

You're calling my sons warts?
Not that I mind...

No, no, no, no, no, no, Tim.
What I'm trying to say is,

most people think the best way to
get rid of a wart is to cut it off,

but in actuality
that isn't the best solution.

See, the wart will reappear

because the virus is still
below the surface of the skin.

So just putting my two warts
in separate rooms

isn't gonna cure
this problem, huh?

No. No, Tim, the only way
to get rid of a wart

is to go beneath the surface
of the oily skin

and dig out the root.

I see. Thanks.

Mm-hmm.

- Wilson?
- Mm-hmm?

This is bar none the most disgusting
conversation we've ever had.

Hi.

Hi.

Where's Mark?

I don't know.

Did you stuff him
in one of these drawers?

Not funny, huh?

It's about as funny
as what Dad did.

You think you could talk to him?

Would you feel better if things
went back to the way they were?

I'd feel better
if I had my own room.

Unfortunately, that's not
gonna be an option.

So what are my options?

Living with the dork

or living with Brad who
talks on the phone all day.

Honey, Brad is
in junior high school now.

He's got a lot
of new stuff happening.

He's meeting new friends,
getting interested in girls...

Let me get this straight.

Brad gets new friends,
girls and his own room

and I get Mark?

I'm sorry. I know
that this is hard for you.

I remember
when my sister hit her teens.

She was doing all this interesting
stuff that I wished I was doing.

Well, like what?

Well, she got her own room.

She started wearing makeup,
shaving her legs.

Can you imagine how I felt
when she got to wear a bra

and I was still wearing
a dorky undershirt?

Yeah, I can. When do you think
I'll get to wear a bra, Mom?

OK. OK, that's probably
not the greatest example.

But what I mean is...
I got older, you know,

and I got to have
some of those same experiences.

I can't say the shaving the legs
part was so great,

but then my sister moved out.

Then you got your own room.

No, then Dad turned it
into a study.

Great.

Don't worry. With your father,
you won't have that problem.

Yeah. Dad's idea of a study

is a toilet
and three hot-rod magazines.

You know, Randy,
there are some advantages

to sharing a room
with a younger kid.

Such as?

You have always wanted
to have the upper bunk.

You get to listen
to more of your music,

nobody can kick you
out of your room.

Yeah...

but I can always kick Mark out.

I didn't say that.

Oh, who knows? Maybe one of these
days I'll completely lose my mind

and let your father build
another room.

I don't think so, Mom.

Jill. Jill...

- We gotta talk.
- No, it's not necessary.

I've been thinking
about what you said,

and I think women do need
to be more decisive.

So I've decided that we should
move my car into the garage

- and your hot rod out to the street
- No.

- and I should paint all your tools pink.
- No, no.

I also decided that I'm not
doing any more of your laundry.

OK, OK, OK, I get your point.

And I've decided
that no matter what I do,

those warts are going
back to Bulgaria.

Why do I even try
to talk to you?

We've got to get
beneath the oily surface

to the root
of the boys' problem.

I've already gotten
to the root of the problem.

Randy feels Brad
is leaving him behind.

- What do you mean?
- Brad's growing up.

He doesn't want to spend time hanging
around with his little brother anymore.

That's what this is about?

Yeah. It was bound
to happen, I guess.

Yeah. There was a time my brothers
didn't want me tagging around with them.

Did it bum you out?

Not really, 'cause
I'd tag along anyway.

- Bummed them out.
- I bet.

They'd go to the drive-in
with their girlfriends.

I'd sit in back and pop up when they
were starting to make their move

with a fright wig and...

- Get out of my room!
- It's my room, too!

Let me in! Get out of my room!

I just made another decision.

Puerto Rico?

It's nice this time of year.

Hi.

Hi.

Is it all right
if I hang out in here?

If you want.

I've gotta get away from Mom.

Why? Did she tell you
the bra story?

No. She keeps bugging me
about my new room.

You know, having your own room

isn't as great
as you think it is.

Why not?

Because Mom says
it's a privilege

and with privilege
comes more responsibility.

Sounds bad.

No kidding.

I even have to do
my own laundry.

Oh, man.

But it's not that bad.
See, I figured it out.

I'll only have to do it
once a month

if I turn my shirts inside out

and, um, I wear my underwear
three times.

Brad, do me a little favor.

When it gets to
the end of the month,

stay in your own room.

Hey.

Can you imagine how I felt
when she got to wear a bra

and I was still wearing
a dorky undershirt?

Yeah, I can.

No!

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