Original subtitles

Okay, Cleo, it's time to go, honey.

But, Mom,

I'm Blitzen,

and Santa's still working.

Okay, Blitzen.

One more time around, and then we go, okay? I mean it.

Come on, all you reindeer, Santa needs us.

Okay, so he's 35.

He's never been married--

Okay, there is trouble right there.

No, he's just waiting for the right one,

and it could be you.

Oh, my gosh.

Can you hand me that star over there?

You made this?

Oh, yes, it's my new line.

They're all hand-crafted and original designs.

I love it. How much?

Oh, this one is actually not for sale.

Aw. Probably for the best.

My cat would break it in a second.

[laughs]

Okay, now, about Mr. Right.

He's a software engineer for a new start-up company,

and he's a dog nut, just like you.

Great. Holly...

Holly, I told you, I'm just, I'm not ready.

Ashley Jane Harrison!

You said that six months ago.

Yes, exactly.

It takes six months for a broken leg to heal.

Just imagine the complexities of the human heart.

You have to learn how to rebuild trust.

You've got to learn how to let your guard down again.

You've got to recalibrate your Truth-o-Meter.

Your Truth-o what?

You know, your Truth-o-Meter,

The little meter in your brain

that lets you know

when your so-called boyfriend is lying

when he says that he's 100% over his ex-fiancée.

Yeah.

Clearly, my Truth-o-Meter is out of whack.

I told him we'd all have drinks

tonight.

Are you kidding?

Come on, one drink.

You've gotta get your game back.

No, I have to get on an 8:00 flight.

Tomorrow.

It's holiday travel.

I am going to have to get up at the crack of dawn.

You're making excuses.

Exactly.

If you really want to meet someone, you gotta--

Oh, but, no, I don't.

So...

Oh, here comes Blitzen.

Okay, fine.

This is me backing off.

Okay, have a good trip home,

and, uh, say hi to your mom.

How's she doing?

Um, you know, she's...

she misses Dad.

Yeah. Okay.

[kids approach, laughing and playing]

I'm ready, Mom!

Okay. Good job, honey.

Well, tell her that Blitzen and I send our love.

I will. She'll like that.

Okay. All right. Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas, Ashley!

Merry Christmas, sweetie.

Bye, all you reindeer!

[children]: Merry Christmas, Ashley!

[Ashley]: Bye!

[Mom]: Have a good trip!

[beeping numbers]

[beeps in error]

I just put in my name and my flight number.

[beeping numbers]

[beeps in error]

What? I can't go to the ticket agent.

I don't have time, I will miss my flight.

Yeah. Like you care.

Check that line-up.

Excuse me, does anybody mind

if I just jump in front of the line?

Because my flight's really... soon.

Okay, I was just... checking.

[sighs]

Look over there.

Let's cover all of it.

Yes, sir. Right away.

Could you spell your last name again?

Again?

Because you think it maybe has changed

since the last five times--

You're sure it's Harrison as in "son"? S-O-N.

[chuckles in disbelief]

Am I sure how to spell my own name?

Yes.

Ashley Harrison, like "son."

Hmm.

What? What's that look? What's "Hmm."

I'm afraid you're going to have to stand aside.

No, no, no, I have a reservation--

An agent will be right over--

-The flight's in 10 minutes! -Stand right there, please.

You don't understand, I need to be on this flight.

I have to get--

Ma'am. Right back over there, please.

My mother is in Seattle, and she's expecting me.

It is Christmas!

Okay, I know I should have booked my flight earlier,

but I have been knitting like crazy

trying to get my inventory ready for this holiday season, and...

I mean, come on, please, look,

I have calluses,

from knitting!

Did you even know that was possible?

An agent will be right with you, Miss Ashley Harrison.

Next in line!

Just one sec.

What if I give you this?

Look, it's my best seller.

It's pure Angora wool.

It's really soft and lovely.

It looks really beautiful on you,

it brings out your eyes--

Airport professionals do not accept bribes.

Can you at least just tell me why?

An agent will be right with you.

Happy holidays.

Next!

[muttering] I can't believe this.

Look at all the cancellations.

Look, every single flight.

Every single flight!

I mean, can you believe that?

Great.

Plan B.

Hey!

Hey, you can't go over there!

Excuse me.

Hey!

She's leaving!

[man]: Hello, ladies.

♪ Jingle bells Jingle all the way ♪

I don't need anything special.

Just your regular run-of-the-mill car,

just something that goes forwards and backwards,

'cause I'm just going to Seattle, so it's not--

You're funny.

Why?

We have exactly one car left on our lot,

and by "we," I mean everyone,

all of us,

the whole airport.

Okay, that's fine--

I'll take it!

I'm sorry, you can't do that.

Whatever it is, I'll take it.

Okay, first of all,

airport professionals do not accept bribes.

Nice scarf.

Drivers license and credit card, please?

Yeah, sure.

Drop off or round trip?

Uh, drop off in Seattle.

You can't do this. I was here first.

I really need to get up to Seattle by tomorrow, so...

I really need to get up to Seattle,

and I was here first.

I would like to know why

we're not talking about the fact that I was here first.

Insurance and pre-paid gas?

Sure.

You know what, I have a really good idea,

why don't we split it?

I'll take care of the rental car,

you take care of the gas.

Like I'm going to get into a car with a stranger,

especially one who bribes very unprofessional

airport car rental people associates.

Agent people.

I don't care--

It's your call.

I mean, it looks like we're both going up to Seattle, so...

No, because I've seen this movie,

and I know how it ends.

Some...

quasi-attractive, charming, friendly,

wrinkled shirt guy

ends up being an axe murderer,

and the sound track is like--

[singing "Jaws" theme]

That's "Jaws."

Please sign at the bottom.

You know what, I don't care what it is,

this is ridiculous.

This is unprofessional.

Well, suit yourself.

-Merry Christmas. -[agent]: And to you, sir.

And my shirt's not that wrinkled.

I cannot believe you.

You're mean.

-Okay, have a good one. -I just want to go to Seattle.

Do not have a merry Christmas.

Hang on...

Hang on.

Call your mom.

Call my... my mom?

Yeah, call your mom, let me talk to her,

and then I'll know that you're...

Not an axe murderer?

Yes.

Come on. I need you to do this. Please?

I can't believe this.

What, do you want me to pay for gas, or not?

[sighing heavily]

Hey, Mom.

Hi, um...

I have this girl that wants to speak to you.

She doesn't know if she can trust me.

I'll explain later.

Okay, here.

Mrs...?

Sutherland.

Hello, Mrs. Sutherland.

Hi, this is Ashley Harrison,

and I was just calling because I wanted to talk--

No, no, no, we're not going on a date.

We're just maybe going to share a care ride together.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, he looks okay, I guess.

I mean, he could use a shave.

Me? I am 29.

I was born and raised on the West Coast.

Okay, all right, wrap it up.

[chuckles] Okay,

I think we actually need to get going,

but, um... Hmm?

Me? No, I've never been married--

Okay, that's great.

Fantastic.

Wonderful, Mom.

Thank you for doing that.

All right, I love you.

We'll speak soon.

You satisfied?

Yes. She was nice.

Although she said

you need to call her more often,

but who doesn't call their mother.

What is wrong with you?

Oh...

This really is the only car on the lot.

Okay.

Oh, no, I've got it.

I don't want you thinking I'm some needy gal.

If you must know,

"Independence" is my middle name.

"Relies on strangers to catch a ride"

would be a more appropriate name.

Hardly the pinnacle of independence.

Oh, you're funny.

See my face laughing?

[shivering]

Elizabeth?

My name is Ashley.

No, your middle name,

while we're on the topic.

It's Elizabeth, right?

No, it's not, Mr. Mindreader.

Why do you want to know?

Just making conversation.

Trying to get to know you better.

Who knows, you could be the axe murderer.

Right, 'cause a guy can't be too careful these days.

It's Jane, if you must know.

"Jane" was going to be my next guess.

Right.

It's Ashley Jane Harrison.

"Son" as in S-O-N?

Yes. I'm absolutely sure.

I asked her a number of times.

What was she transporting?

Transporting?

Luggage, bags, containers.

Uh... a suitcase, I think,

and she had a purse.

We mean anything out of the ordinary.

No, I... I don't know, like what?

Anything.

Think.

A red box.

What sort of red box?

Like the kind most of my passengers are carrying

this time of the year.

It's Christmas, for heaven's sake.

Harrison, Ashley Jane, Caucasian,

date of birth, March 5th,

1986...

She said she was a knitter.

Suspected collaborator,

trafficker,

possible courier for known foreign subversives,

placed on the No-Fly List

on April, 2015.

Didn't have a photo of her

until she tried to check in

for her flight this morning.

So, what do you do

when you're not missing flights?

Um, I'm a crafter.

You know, I make things to sell at craft fairs,

and I didn't actually miss my flight.

Something weird happened.

I don't know what I did...

What are you doing ?

Chapstick.

What?

I can't find my chapstick.

Well, why don't I call CNN?

We have to stop.

Are you serious?

I can't do a road trip without my chapstick.

Well good, 'cause we're not on a road trip.

We're just in a car, going someplace.

On a road.

For two days and three states.

That is a road trip.

Oh, there you are.

Your chapstick?

No, that's still MIA.

Hee-hee...

What are you-- what are you doing?

I sound like a broken record here.

You really do.

Just a little Christmas spirit.

You know, I'm embracing the festivities of the season.

Also, you're tailgating.

Am not.

Are too.

For your information,

tailgating is when you're less than one car length away.

Times miles per hour.

You're going 60 miles per hour,

you should be six car lengths behind.

Who taught you how to drive,

a little old lady from Pasadena?

Trust me, I know how to drive.

Well, regardless,

I can't got 12 hours without my chapstick,

so we need to stop, please.

[clears throat]

Please? In and out. In and out.

[singing along with store carols]

♪ Snow... ♪

♪ It won't be long ♪

♪ Before we'll all be there with snow... ♪

♪ Snow... ♪

♪ I wanna wash my hands my face, and hair with snow ♪

Oh, Irving Berlin?

Come on, it's so good.

♪ What is Christmas with no snow? ♪

Come on, Christmas is the best time of year.

Tell me you're not going to sing show tunes

the entire time.

So what do you do

when you're not being a big party pooper?

I... paint houses.

Really?

You must be really good,

because you do not have any paint on your hands.

I mean...

you actually have really nice hands.

It's just something that I noticed.

I wasn't really looking

for any reason in particular,

it's just that I have not very nice hands,

'cause I have calluses on them and everything.

Oh, my gosh, is that the time?

Thank you.

Okay, we really need to go,

because, for the record, I am never late.

For the record,

I didn't want to make this stop.

What are you doing?

You're going to freeze out there.

I'm just a little bit woozy, I'll be fine.

Okay, glad to hear.

Okay, so, why are you in such a rush

to get to Seattle?

What?

What's in Seattle?

Nothing.

Nothing?

You stole my car for nothing?

What, are you meeting a girlfriend,

or a fiancée, or something, for Christmas?

I'm just going up there for work.

You're painting a house in the winter?

No.

Not that type of work.

Hmm, Mr. Mysterioso.

What about you?

Where's your boyfriend, slash, fiancé,

over this holiday season?

Oh, sorry, I can't hear you.

Hah!

Mrs. Mysterioso!

Really?

Mr. and Mrs. Mysterioso?

We just met, is that a Freudian slip?

I told you, I paint houses.

Any talk about Freud or psychology,

and it's-- It's over my head.

[chuckles]

Well, that's the whole point of the unconscious mind.

It's when you're not aware,

that the real truth comes out.

I was a Psych major in college.

Well, excuse me.

Ladies and Gentleman, we have an expert in the car.

Mm-hmm.

We have assets in the field.

We could have her apprehended by noon.

That's not the plan.

My gut says she's on a mission right now.

We'll just tail her.

If we keep it discreet,

she'll lead us to her people.

Risky.

I guarantee you,

somewhere between here and Seattle,

Ashley Jane Harrison's going to make an unexpected stop.

She'll make a drop at her contact.

And then, Agent Hobbs, we strike.

All right, I'll keep you informed.

[alert pings]

Hmm.

What?

The "check engine" light just came on.

Oh, I always just ignore that.

Why am I not surprised?

So according to the agent,

Harrison left the rental lot

at approximately 9:00 this morning, which--

Which puts her somewhere north of Esparto,

maybe Vacaville.

-Hobbs! -Sir?

Contact the Sacramento bureau.

Put Agent Gregson on her tail.

No contact.

Just back-up until--

-Can't. -What?

Gregson's on Operation Sentinel.

So, we really don't have any--

Well, there must be someone.

Well, there's the new guy.

Who's the new guy?

You don't want the new guy.

[pencil sharpener whirring]

[telephone rings]

Agent Phelps, FBI.

Phelps,

I understand you are ready and able

to serve your country's national security.

Yes, sir.

Take this down.

Oregon. Yankee-Hotel-Alpha...

4-4-3.

Yankee-Hotel...

Alpha-4-4-3.

Yes, sir.

[radiator hissing]

Hey, come on!

Merry Christmas to you, too!

[both sighing in exasperation]

[simultaneously]: -Jinx. -Jinx.

Don't do that.

What? It worked for Claudette Colbert.

Who?

"It Happened One Night."

Claudette Colbert, Clark Gable?

That was a movie.

This is real life.

This is us missing an opportunity.

Just observe, and learn.

If my memory serves me,

the car stopped for Claudette.

Yeah, that was a movie, this is real life,

where we still have no service.

Well, unless somebody puts up a cell phone tower

in the next few minutes,

it's pretty much going to stay that way.

Aren't you so funny.

So, what are we supposed to do now, smart aleck?

Someone will come along.

I'm sorry, was that a note of optimism?

A little positivity?

From you?

How'd that happen?

And if they don't,

then we'll just walk it.

Next sign of life, this way.

[chuckles dubiously] Really?

Yeah, come on, we're on a road trip.

A little adventure.

[sighing]

Right, okay.

Yes, good.

This is fine,

a little exercise, a little fresh air.

Yeah.

How far?

Eight miles.

[stammers] No.

Come on, Claudette.

Positive thinking.

What?

Claudette Colbert,

just less effective.

[shivering]

Dude, stop staring, please.

Your eyes are gonna fall out.

Yeah, but look at her.

I'm taking Bailey Thompson on the Junior Class ski trip.

That is totally sick.

Yeah, except

now your parents are gonna kill you

when they find out you didn't renew

your car registration--

There you go. Enjoy.

--Because you spent your money

on Bailey Thompson's ski package, Travis.

Hey.

How's the latte?

Best one yet.

I have to get going.

Oh.

See you around.

"Best one yet."

What, did you put a heart in her foam?

You know, jealousy is not your best quality.

Jealous?

Jealous of what?

One day, you're gonna thank me

for showing you how to think outside the box

when pursuing your goals.

Me and Bailey Thompson...

Thanks, man.

Every little bit helps.

You know, maybe you should put out another tip jar--

"Help underpaid barista

pay for his car insurance and registration."

Dude, your buzz-kill is showing.

So, how did you get your heart broken?

Wild guess.

[grumbles]

It happened about a year ago.

He said he was one thing.

Turns out he was something else.

What did he say he was?

Single.

[chuckles ruefully]

I just, I can't understand

how people can lie about who they really are?

It's so mean.

But it's for the best,

because it helped me develop my own personal trust test,

which is foolproof.

I'm all ears.

Santa Claus.

A person who believes in the idea of Santa Claus

is fundamentally a good person.

[clears throat awkwardly]

Santa Claus?

Yeah.

It means they believe in hope and generosity

and reward for good behavior.

So, what happened

when you flunked out of Psych?

Ha ha.

Are we there yet?

We're close.

So, do you?

Do I what?

Do you believe in Santa Claus?

I believe in advertising.

Ow. My feet hurt.

How you doing?

Not too bad, how about you?

Could be better.

Yeah, I suppose.

Car just broke down...

Um, sorry, excuse me,

do you have a ladies' room?

Oh, yeah, in the bay to the right there.

Thank you.

So what seems to be the problem?

I don't know. The engine light came on.

[power tools whining]

Hi.

Yeah, it's me.

Something's come up.

[in a foreign language] Am fost întârziat.

Ceva venit.

Dar voi fi acolo mâine.

[sighs wearily]

Okay.

She's on the phone, sir.

Did she make the call or receive the call?

I can't tell.

She has her back turned right now.

She's made contact with someone.

[puppy whining]

[whining and barking]

[chuckling fondly] Oh, my gosh...

Oh, you guys are so cute.

You are so cute!

Hello! Hi!

What are you doing out here in the cold?

You little--

Can you believe I picked up those little buggers

on the side of a road?

People these days,

no tenderness.

So, you wanna take one of these little guys?

Really?

They're free,

but only to a good home.

Do you have a fenced-in yard?

Do you have any young kids running around the house?

People don't know

that young kids can scare the heck out of a dog.

You know?

Because they're all, like,

"Ah! Look at it, look at it! Ah!"

To a dog, that's a sign of aggression.

I can.. I can see that.

That's how dog bites happen.

They blame the dog.

[whining]

It's all just a cross-cultural misunderstanding.

You know what?

It happens to people, too, you know.

They just can't get past the insecurities

and prejudices.

She's talking to some guy.

He looks rough.

Rough?

What kind of rough?

Biker, sir.

Like, that kind of rough.

She's got contacts everywhere.

Was there a hand-off?

Looks like... a puppy.

A what?

She's got puppies in her hand, sir.

Looks like he's giving her one.

It's a very cute puppy.

All right, well, keep your eyes on them,

and we'll find out who he is.

Yes, sir. I'm on it.

There it is... Perfect.

Thanks, keep the change.

Thank you very much.

I'm Ashley, by the way. What's your name?

I'm Blade.

Oh, cool.

So,

you got a safe home for one of these little guys?

Um...

Which one, which one...

Okay.

I'm thinking my mom

might like this little guy for Christmas.

And don't worry, she has an enclosed yard.

Okay, okay, that's a good thing.

Enclosed yard.

And I like your energy.

All your chakras are lining up,

I like that.

So, yeah, I could see this thing happening.

Plus, you, uh,

you picked my favorite one.

Oh, well, if it's okay with you for me to take him,

I'll name him "Little Blade."

"Little Blade?"

If that's okay.

Hey, Little Blade...

you grow up to be a bruiser, okay?

You hear me?

[giggles]

Make me proud.

"Okay."

[giggles] Thank you.

You're welcome.

Should we go?

It's okay.

We're okay.

Oh, my gosh, look what I found.

Look what I found.

Oh, come on,

he's for my mom.

Even you cannot deny how cute this face is.

"Hello!"

Is there a problem?

I'm just, uh, encountering a little bit of resistance.

This is my new friend, Blade.

This is my traveling companion,

Dash.

Dash...

You got a problem with the puppy?

Might not be the dog.

You know, it's a proven fact

that having a dog in your life

raises your endorphins.

Makes you live longer,

gives you compassion.

Endorphins?

It's a proven fact.

I bet you believe in Santa Claus.

No, I'm Jewish.

-Okay. -So...

Come on, man.

She's getting the dog for her mom.

And on top of that,

it already has a really cool name.

"Little Blade?"

Seriously?

Now, that was your axe murderer.

You cannot judge a book by its cover, okay?

He was nice,

and now I have this wonderful memento

to remember this adventure.

Well, let's hope your little memento

doesn't have an accident in the car.

Don't listen to him, Little Blade.

He's a grumpy-pants.

I know what will cheer you up.

[whispering]

Look what I found.

♪ Snow... ♪

I've got eyes on them, sir.

Report anything suspicious.

Follow the protocols, Agent.

Any response from the NTAS?

Yes, they responded.

I also consulted NCIC, and IDW for any chatter being tracked,

and nothing, sir.

There are no active terrorist cells

being monitored in Reading.

That doesn't track with what we're observing.

They're missing it.

We're onto something big.

Stop worrying,

you're going to get ulcers.

You know, every time you say, "Stop worrying,"

something bad happens.

That is so not true.

That time we snuck into the movie theater.

Oh, as if that was my fault.

Who knew the manager was standing right there?

Okay, fine, the time with the trampoline.

You practically broke your wrist.

Okay, I get your being a friend

and yeah, I should have listened to you

when I did the trampoline thing.

Okay, but here's the deal.

What are the chances

some cop is going to see my expired tags

in the next three weeks?

There's, like, what,

five million cars on the road,

and 21 days between now

and when I have enough money to pay for the new tags,

that's like...

what's five million times 21?

It's a one in 100-million chance

I'm going to get caught.

Dude, I'm not sure your logic is tracking.

The point is,

no cop is going to see my expired plates, okay?

Okay, now it is time

for your daily dose of trivia.

Did you know that Highway 5

actually has five different names?

It's the Montgomery Freeway,

the San Diego Freeway,

the Santa Ana Freeway,

the Golden State Freeway, and the West Side Freeway.

I did not know that.

And the section in Sacramento

was actually built below the water table

so you can't see it from the offices downtown.

It's called the "Boat Section."

Psych major

with a minor in Highway Geekdom?

[laughs]

Oh, no, it was my dad.

He loved road trips.

Every summer, him, and my mom, and I

would just hop in the car,

and "ride the highways," he liked to say.

He always thought

that the Interstate Highway System

should have been one of the wonders of the world.

Did you know the real name was the Dwight D. Eisenhower

National System of Interstate--

--Interstate and Defense Highways.

How do you know that?

Nobody knows that!

I just do.

[chuckles] Okay.

That's crazy, but...

you don't tell me anything.

There's nothing special to tell you.

Everyone has something special about them.

Call your mom.

What?

Call your mom.

I want to know why you're so secretive.

I'm not-- I don't want to call my mom.

Please?

Knock yourself out.

What's her first name?

Can I call her that?

Shirley.

Wait, Shirley is her name,

or, surely, I can call her that.

[giggles]

Oh, hello, Mrs. Sutherland?

Hi. Yes, it's Ashley again.

No, no, no, everything's fine.

Uh, we're just outside of Sacramento.

[laughs] Yeah.

Actually, I was calling,

because I wanted to know

what the most special thing about Dash is?

'Cause he won't tell me anything.

Well, besides that he's your son.

Seriously?

What?

What is she saying?

What is she saying to you?

Uh, yeah.

That's great. Yup.

Thank you.

Bye.

Did she tell you that I was an Eagle Scout?

Were you?

Now you know everything about me.

Actually, she told me

that you were a hero in Afghanistan.

"Hero" is a bit of a stretch.

We are now entering the town of Mistletoe,

established in 1857, population 947.

Do not blink, or you'll miss it.

What?

I don't know, I just...

Look up ahead there.

What?

[Ashley]: I've been here before.

Don't even think of it.

Oh... please.

Of course we'll stop.

[gasping]

Mistletoe!

Mistletoe! Yeah, yeah.

[Ashley]: You're going to stay here in the car, Little Blade.

We'll be back soon.

Okay, don't be too cold.

I think we might have gotten lost.

I can't remember,

but I've definitely been here before.

Making an unplanned stop in a town called Mistletoe.

We're on it. Mistletoe.

Stay with her, Phelps.

Don't let her outta your sight.

I remember thinking

it was like a gingerbread house,

and there was eggnog, and...

there is eggnog.

It's okay.

Oh, and they were the best pies.

Everyone was eating pie for dinner.

...And there was this man with this crazy beard,

and I remember I was so scared of him,

but then my dad made me laugh,

and everything was okay--

Do you believe in Santa Claus?

Of course I do.

Do you?

Yeah.

Then you get to make a wish, and I'll put it on the tree.

But don't tell, or it won't come true.

Oh, I will not, Scout's honor.

We could hang it together, if you like?

I would love that.

[shutter clicking]

Choose one.

Okay.

This one?

Good.

Can you hold this, please?

Uh... why not?

Shall we?

See, some people get embarrassed,

so I do it for them.

Oh, well, not me.

There is nothing I would like more in the world.

You ready?

Good job.

That is perfect.

Thank you.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

What about you?

Are you going to put a star on the tree for Santa?

You know, I'm starving.

[shutter clicking]

This is all we got on Ashley Jane Harrison

prior to 2012.

Before she landed on our radar,

it was like she was a model citizen.

Look.

She volunteered as a nurse's aide

at 14,

wrote for the student paper in college.

Jeez, her credit score is better than mine.

Sir, are you sure that this is--

Radicals are made not born, Hobbs.

This is so weird,

and wonderful.

I mean, they even have hay rides.

I wonder if this is where my dad got the idea.

What idea?

Saturday...

is our town's Christmas tree lighting ceremony.

It's a tradition my mom and dad started.

We make cookies and hot cocoa,

and the whole town comes out,

and as soon as it gets dark...

zing, the whole tree lights up.

And then my dad would rent Mr. Bennett's hay truck

and give hay rides.

I don't think anyone will be giving hay rides this year.

Even if I was in China,

I'd find a way to get home for it,

and this year...

I really need to be there to make sure my mom's not alone.

That's why I need to get home.

Well, as long as we don't hit any traffic in Portland--

What's the matter?

[clears throat]

Nothing.

Let's just get the check.

Excuse me?

Mm! My pie.

Check, please?

[Phelps]: I'm still with them, sir.

Excellent work, young man.

Well done.

And you're sure that she didn't see you?

Yes, sir.

Mm-hmm. Now, you listen to me,

Agent Phelps.

The next 24 hours are crucial.

Do not lose them.

She might seem innocent,

but this woman is a threat to our national security.

Understood?

Copy that.

What are you looking for?

Nothing.

You've been kind of quiet

since we got back in the car.

Is everything okay?

Freud speaks.

No, just the female powers of perception.

And I'm bored.

So now we're getting to the truth.

Oh, are we?

In that case...

tell me something.

What?

I don't know, anything.

Tell me, uh...

how did you get your name?

You won't believe me.

Try me.

[clears throat awkwardly]

My, uh...

my mom loved mystery books...

so she named me after her favorite writer,

Dashiel.

Hammett?

"The Maltese Falcon?"

Hey, whoa, this is a squeal-free zone, okay?

[sighing] Oh!

The Thin Man!

I love him!

You scared the dog.

He's fine.

And, oh, my gosh,

his love affair with Lillian Hellman,

I mean...

That's my sister's name.

Lillian.

I don't believe you.

I told you.

No way, I'm calling your mom.

No. No, no, no.

You're not calling my mom, okay?

Ashley--

Fletcher!

Where's Hobbs?

I'll find her.

Hobbs!

Get in here now!

Hello?

Hi! Mrs. Sutherland?

It's me again, Ashley.

Uh, I'm sorry, I hope I'm not bothering you?

Of course not, dear.

I was just doing up the dishes in the kitchen,

and as a matter of fact, I was about to call Dash.

Might I have a quick word with him?

Just a quick question.

Oh, yeah.

She wants to talk to you.

Hi...

Mom.

And...

There you go.

Excuse me.

Come on, come on, come on, come on.

Open door.

Got some good tunes?

Huh? What?

No. I mean, yeah. I guess.

I just remembered

I gotta grab something from in here.

My son's into... somebody Mars.

Oh. Bruno. Yeah, cool. Cool.

Hey, no texting and driving.

Sure thing.

What did I tell you?

Dude, you see that?

The cop was practically touching my expired tag.

If I get a ticket,

I'm going to be grounded for, like, a year.

No ski trip,

no Bailey.

What, you're just figuring this out now?

Yeah, but I got a plan.

I saw it on TV once.

Dude, I'm the man.

[♪♪]

[Ashley]: Turn around. Turn around.

Yeah!

Yeah...

[Little Blade growling]

Hey, puppy.

Yeah!

Go, Blade.

Yeah, puppy.

Yeah.

[Blade barking]

Come on. Can you sit? Oh, it's so cold.

Oh!

Come on.

Sit. Good boy.

Wow, you're so smart. Yay.

Oh.

-Oh, gosh. -Here you go.

-Oh, hey. -Here.

Here you go.

Thank you.

Shirley raised a gentleman.

Yeah, right.

Oh. [laughs]

Hey... Hey, buddy.

Little Blade likes you.

Do you have a little puppy crush

on your Uncle Dash?

[giggling]

Do you want to hold him?

Uh...

[shutter clicking]

No.

Let's go.

Come on.

I'm sorry.

I guess I'm hungry and a little tired.

You should have eaten your whole burger, then.

Probably.

Well, maybe we should stop and get you some food.

I need to get some supplies for Little Blade, too.

He must be cold. He needs a sweater.

Something cute and Christmas-y. Hey, Blade?

Wait, Blade?

Who's Blade?

[together]: The puppy.

Ah-hah.

And what should we get you, Grumpy?

Would a snack help you?

Yeah. Maybe.

Okay, 'cause I have

a whole bag full of candy canes, so...

You know what, I'm...

I'm okay.

Forgive me.

You're a grouch when you're hungry.

I guess you're kind of a grouch all of the time.

I was a gentleman a few minutes ago.

That was then.

[scoffs]

[chuckles]

Cheer up. We're stopping soon.

Our subject's getting ready to make a stop.

What's your location, Agent Phelps?

[♪♪]

[Phelps]: They're heading into town, sir.

I'm tracking them.

Got them.

Right behind them, sir.

This is your plan?

Stealing someone's plates is not sure-fire.

No, no. Not stealing, swapping.

Good to know the distinction.

Dude, you aren't going to get grounded,

you're going to get arrested.

Trust me, all right?

The key is to find a car

that is the same make and color.

I saw it on TV once.

I saw a guy eat live cockroaches on TV once,

but it doesn't mean--

-Score. -Really?

Dude, I'm hounded by good fortune.

That car is exactly the same.

...Puppy fashion accessories, both stylish and practical,

because we have to keep Little Blade warm.

And a toothbrush.

For Blade?

No, for me.

Okay.

Well, we should get to Seattle

in time for Groundhog Day.

You had very critical parents, didn't you?

Psych 101?

Well, I'm right, aren't I?

Little Blade knows I'm right.

Ooh! Look at all this stuff!

All right, let's do it.

Another Marina scenario.

Sir, I don't think--

It is.

I thought you said he was stable.

He has passed every evaluation

since the incident.

Get Agent Phelps on the phone.

Yes, sir.

Does this look like a man who has stayed objective?

Oh...

Oh, these are so cute.

Come on.

So cute.

Okay, I'm going a little bit overboard,

aren't I?

No, not at all.

Every dog needs a pair of Christmas slippers?

Aw...

Oh!

That's so cute.

Come on.

Why not?

Understood.

Yes, sir.

Yes.

Wait, just the one word, sir?

Just the one word.

"Marina."

He'll understand.

Y-yes, sir.

Sure you got everything?

Yes.

Is that your first?

I can always tell.

I shopped like a maniac for my first baby.

By the time these two came along,

I would just go for the essentials.

Isn't that right, Peek and Boo?

Except for the hair barrettes.

I'm still a sucker for those.

So, what breed is your little guy?

Oh, you know, he's a mutt.

We found him in a cardboard box on the side of the road.

Well, bless your heart.

Saving a little soul from the shelter.

Your wife has a heart of gold.

No, no, we're not--

She does, indeed.

[quietly] Marina.

[chatting and giggling]

Are we done?

-Hurry! -Okay.

Almost got it.

Dude, this is just like the movies.

Yeah, right before the sidekick gets nailed.

Scalpel, nurse.

What?

I always wanted to say that.

Gimme the screwdriver, come on.

Hurry, come on.

[car alarm wailing and blaring]

Go see what's happening.

[alarm blaring]

It's just some old guy trying to get in his car.

Dude, dude, dude, dude, dude! We gotta go. We gotta hurry.

Okay, okay.

Let's go.

Enough with the puppy, okay?

What is your problem?

I just want to get on the road.

You know that sweater?

I just want to hit the road.

Okay, one minute. I think we're friends,

and you're nice,

and I think we can talk,

and that you care,

and the next minute...

See that cute puppy?

Dude, focus.

We're playing for higher stakes here.

Come on.

[kids chatting]

[honking impatiently]

[Phelps]: He's helping kids with a tree.

[blaring horn]

[honking and shouting]

Merry Christmas to you, too, jerk!

Old guys, I tell ya.

No...

No, no, no, no, no.

No. No!

All right.

Give it to me.

Sometimes, back home,

when it was gray and sleety like this,

my parents and I would just use it as an excuse

to stay inside and just watch movies

all bundled up together.

My mom's favorite was "Brief Encounter."

"I have no thoughts at all.

"Only an overwhelming desire

never to feel anything ever again."

I swear she started crying at the opening credits.

That movie was Pavlovian.

I don't know that one.

Is that with the aliens?

[chuckles]

That's "Close Encounters."

I'm glad you're talking again.

We have a long drive still.

Ashley...

there's things that I wish I could explain,

but I can't.

You understand?

I'm sorry.

Yeah.

You said last time, too.

And I mean it, I swear.

Hey, which was the nice one?

Dr. Jekyll, or Mr. Hyde?

'Cause I forget.

Monroe, sir! We found them!

They ran a red light on Maple Avenue in Eugene.

Get Agent Phelps.

Yes, sir.

Phelps, we found them.

They ran a red light on Maple Avenue in Eugene.

Okay, I got it.

I'm approaching Maple Avenue now.

So you're half an hour behind, maybe less.

Trust me, sir.

I won't lose them again.

I'm on it.

Are you okay to drive?

Should we stop for the night?

Yeah, maybe we should.

Well, according to my calculations,

we're approaching a township.

About 10 miles as the crow flies.

According to your calculations, yeah?

As the crow flies?

What?

Well, hopefully, there's a motel with a vacancy sign.

Oh, that reminds me of "It Happened One Night."

You know the scene where the car breaks down

and they have to get a ride?

Enough with that movie.

You know, when they go to the old motel

and they have to stay overnight,

but there's only one room,

so they have to put a sheet down the middle.

Don't get your hopes up, there'll be two rooms.

Don't get your hopes up.

My hopes aren't up.

I wasn't hoping,

I was just telling you about a movie.

There's a big difference.

Besides, you probably snore.

For the record, I don't.

I don't believe him.

Mm-mm. I don't.

[♪♪]

That's all we got.

I can't believe this.

[giggling] That's funny.

Are you sure?

You only have one room?

Yeah, we're fully booked.

Only a fool wants to drive in this weather.

[together]: Do you have a spare blanket?

What, are you moving in?

It's a force of habit.

I travel so much for work.

Craft fairs and art shows.

We're all gypsies,

and this makes me feel like I belong somewhere.

You hungry?

Starving.

Well, I think there's a place that's still open

down the street.

Uh, that's...fine.

You need to...

powder your nose or whatever?

Freshen up?

[laughs]

I'm afraid this is as good as it gets.

Do you think Blade will be okay here?

[yips]

I don't know, you tell me.

[barking]

He looks happy.

[barking]

I'll have the desk clerk check in on him.

Bye, puppy.

Sir!

Agent Monroe!

Ashley Harrison's original flight plan.

S-F-X to Sea-Tac.

We know this.

With a stop at P-D-X.

Portland.

Exactly.

What's in Portland?

Okay, listen up!

I need a computer run on all known nefarious groups,

criminal activity, and anti-government watchlists

in Portland, Oregon,

A.S.A.P!

Yes, sir. Copy that.

Her mark is somewhere in Portland.

♪ I'll have a blue Christmas... ♪

I played football.

Tight end. Number 23.

Were you any good?

I was pretty good.

I wasn't as good as my brother.

He was the golden boy.

I was always the family runner-up.

Can I get you guys anything else?

Oh, no, thanks.

Okay.

The check, and we prefer cash.

I'll get mine, you can get yours?

That's fine with me.

You know what?

Actually, you can do me a favor.

Can you change the song?

Is it just me,

or has that same one been playing all night?

You find a way to change it, mister,

and dinner's on me.

That's the boss.

Reminds him of his ex.

The same song plays every night?

You got it.

After a while, you kinda get used to it.

Have a good night.

You too.

She deserves hazard pay.

Hmm.

So... is that why you joined the army,

to get out of your brother's shadow?

I forgot I was having dinner with Freud.

Mm-hmm.

-So, am I right? -Maybe.

I wanted to do something

to make our world a little safer.

We live in a world of bad guys these days.

You know what I mean?

I don't like to think like that.

Although, I guess I did have my wallet stolen last year.

They got into my bank accounts, and my credit cards,

and my computer...

But I guess that's not the type of bad guys

you were talking about.

Sir, I can't understand

what you're trying to order.

Maybe if you just point to each...

Uh, excuse me,

he's trying to order a steak.

Oh, thanks.

He'd like it medium,

with a baked potato and, uh, sour cream.

Okay.

And his friend would like a hamburger

with french fries.

Okay, great. Coming right up.

How do you know sign language?

My dad was deaf.

And he taught me

there are no disabilities,

only challenges.

And everybody has challenges, you just can't always see them.

You just never know what people are going through...

Which is why it is so important to treat everyone with kindness.

Anything?

She's talking about her dad.

He was deaf.

A likely story.

And keep an ear on Sutherland.

Make sure he isn't going soft.

...My dad was so great.

He just... he always showed up.

Any time I needed someone to believe in me,

there he was,

and now that he's gone,

I don't know who's going to do that for me, but...

I guess the answer is no one.

But time to grow up, right?

Why are you looking at me like that?

You just surprise me,

and I find myself...

Oh, uh, he wants to know if I'll dance with him,

with your permission.

Of-of course.

Be my guest.

[♪♪]

[♪♪]

Stolen wallet.

♪ ...But I'll have a blue... blue, blue, blue Christmas... ♪

[applause]

["Blue Christmas" begins again]

Wanna go?

Sure, yeah.

I have not done that in a very long time.

You looked good.

Thanks.

-Shall we? -Yeah.

♪ ...Decorations of red ♪

♪ On a green Christmas tree ♪

♪ Won't mean... ♪

Look, it's snowing!

[giggles in delight]

Tell me more.

More what?

More you.

Your favorite color.

Green.

Ice cream or cake?

[laughs] Both.

What's your...

ultimate dream?

Um...

Well, I want to stop moving from town to town,

living like a gypsy.

And I want to open my own shop.

You know, let people see

what handmade things look like

in our mass-produced world.

I like that.

You have a name?

I do, actually.

"Crafty."

That's a terrible name.

What?

[laughing] It is.

No, it's so good.

It's "Crafty." I make crafts.

I knit things, and ceramics,

and leather goods.

Yeah, it's...

It's, like, "dishonest."

"Shifty."

"Crafty."

[laughs]

Okay, I did not think of that.

[laughs]

Oh, it doesn't matter.

I'll never be able to afford it anyway, so...

[sighs heavily]

You're none of those things, are you?

Shifty.

Dishonest.

Crafty.

You're about as real as it gets,

aren't you, Ashley Jane Harrison?

Is that okay?

It's better than okay.

Ashley.

I have something to tell you.

Actually a lot.

Hear me out, okay?

I, uh...

I told you I became a soldier

so I could do my part and help keep our country safe,

and I did.

But...

it's the work that I still do.

The truth is...

I don't really paint houses.

Something happened

on one of my first assignments back in the States.

I was in EXD,

the Canine Explosives Detection program

for Homeland Security.

My partner was a German Shepherd

named Marina.

Intel told us

that there was a bomb planted on one of the docks

down at the harbor.

[sighs]

It was dark.

The perps started running,

and I had a split second to order Marina to engage.

It was what she trained for,

even if it meant sacrificing her life....

and I couldn't do it.

You understand?

My emotions got in the way of my job.

Marina was reassigned.

I was a liability

and was sent back for evaluation

and more training.

I'm telling you this because...

I'm actually an FBI agent,

and...

[snoring]

we're follow--

Ashley?

[snoring softly]

[sighs]

["Blue Christmas" still playing]

Boy, I love that song.

I just can't get enough of it.

So I noticed.

Thanks.

Hank, look at this!

What's that?

Well, anyone report a lost cell phone?

No. Let's have a look.

I found a cell phone,

and it's nice.

Huh. Well, nobody calls for a week,

you can keep it.

Whoo-hoo.

[roar of vacuum cleaner]

Hobbs!

Is this thing working?

[vacuum shuts off]

[waitress]: I found a lost cell phone here.

Yeah, it was just sitting here in the pool table.

Fletcher, Hobbs, we have a situation!

Get in here!

We've lost contact with Agent Sutherland!

What, like he's gone AWOL?

Or he's been taken hostage by Ashley Harrison.

Hostage?

I told you she was devious.

[Ashley]: "A person who believes

in the idea of Santa Claus

"is fundamentally a good person.

"It means they believe in hope, and generosity,

and reward for good behavior."

[bell jingling]

What?

You're not a believer?

Pardon me?

In Santa Claus, you don't believe?

I mean, I, uh...

I think I might have forgotten how.

Don't mind me,

there's a lot going on in my life right now.

Merry Christmas.

They call it "falling in love"

because it's scary.

How did you...?

Out here, you see a lot of faces,

and yours, my friend, is an open book.

No, no, no,

this face doesn't give anything away.

I'm a trained professional.

Or at least I was up until last night.

-You quit? -Yeah.

They got it all wrong.

She's a... she's a sweetheart.

She doesn't have a criminal bone in her body.

She's kind, and...

I don't know why I'm telling you this.

Well, you must have something you want to get off your chest.

I just, I'm...

having a bit of a scattered morning, that's all.

So, all of this trust and belief business

is suddenly nagging at you.

Yeah, right.

See, the trouble with skeptics is

they tend to be loners.

Believing in things,

people, the miracle of Christmas...

love,

none of that comes easy to them.

Do you remember what it was like

when you were a little boy?

Couldn't get to sleep, got up early?

And under the tree,

Santa had brought you everything you had ever hoped for.

Well, love is just like that.

You just have to let go of doubt

and believe in it.

Do you think...

Do you think it's possible to...

to remember how to believe?

I have a feeling that you've already answered that.

Oh!

Oh, I just love this part!

[♪♪]

♪ It's Christmas time And Santa is my... ♪

Merry Christmas.

[ringing bell]

Fletcher, contact the Portland office.

Hobbs, you come with me.

Tell them we're on our way,

and I need an APB on license plate...

...Yankee-Hotel--

Alpha-4-4-3, I got it.

I slept like a log last night.

So I noticed.

Ashley, about last night, um...

Don't-- Don't say that you regret it.

No.

No, not at all.

Good. Neither do I.

-I just wanted to-- -I actually have a favor I--

[laughing]

Go ahead.

No, you go ahead.

You have a favor to ask?

Yes.

Uh, I was wondering, actually,

if we just could stop

in Wilsonville,

which is just up ahead here?

You want to make a stop?

But I thought you were in a rush to get to Seattle.

Oh, this will just take a second.

What's in Wilsonville?

[chuckling]

Nothing criminal.

You should see your face.

I just have to, um,

drop something off to some friends.

Trav, honey?

Yeah, mom?

How many free lattes are you giving to friends?

Oh, just a thousand to Bailey Thompson.

'Cause I just got last month's invoice

for our beans,

and I don't mind a few freebies,

but, honey, we are running a business here.

Travis!

Is that your car?

I'm, gonna be grounded for the rest of my life.

Uh-huh.

Right plates, wrong car.

She switched the plates.

Fletcher, are you on?

Affirmative.

Do we have the kid's, uh--

I've got it, the kid's license plate is--

Fletcher, I need an APB on license plate--

Oregon. Lima-Mike-Victor-9-3-5.

You got it?

Yes, sir.

William-6-1,

visual on license plate number Lima-Mike-Victor-9-3-5.

I just keep thinking about last night.

It is so crazy

when something...

important happens in your life,

and it's sometimes just when you least expect it,

you know?

Or when you've cut yourself off from feeling anything at all,

and then all of a sudden, just, there it is.

Last night was something, wasn't it?

Where are we?

What is this place?

Oh, I told you, it's just my friends' place.

I will only be a second, I promise.

Can you pop the trunk, please?

[humming Christmas songs]

Okay, I'll just be a minute,

and then, uh, I'll maybe bring them out to meet you?

Okay? Take care of the puppy for me?

I'll try.

[knocking]

[Hobbs]: Hey, Dash?

Agent Hobbs?

What...

What are you doing here?

Agent Sutherland, are you safe?

Safe?

Where's Harrison?

Wait, wait, wait, you have this all wrong.

Are they armed?

No! She's in the house.

-Who else is in the house? -Are they armed?

No, no, she just dropped off a package, okay?

I got something.

Sir, the red box.

Was it a red box?

Did she deliver a red box?

Yes, it's a red box. So what?

-You have the wrong person. -What's her mission?

I don't know her mission. There is no mission.

Do you know what's in that box?

No.

Who's her contact in there?

I don't know.

Then, Agent Sutherland,

you don't know she's innocent.

[Little Blade barking]

[barking]

Sometimes, you have to trust your gut.

You have the wrong person.

Bye!

Stay where you are!

Ashley Jane Harrison!

Ashley...

[in a foreign language] Acesta este omul iti place?

What's going on?

It's not what it looks like, okay?

I'm Agent Monroe with the FBI.

Are there any weapons in the house?

Weapons? No, of course not.

[stammering in protest] Ce se întâmpla?

Nu stiu!

What are you saying?

It's Romanian. She asked, "What's happening?"

Okay, these are my friends.

We work at craft fairs together.

They help me make my reindeer mittens.

Likely story.

You tell them to stay right where they are.

We are going to search the house!

We are looking for a red box!

Call back your men, Monroe--

Stand down, Agent Sutherland.

I'll handle it now.

Agent Sutherland?

What is he talking about?

Ashley, I tried to explain.

[girl]: Auntie Ashley, it's so pretty!

Nadia!

Get back in the house.

That's what was in the red box?

Yes, it's a Christmas ornament

I made for their Christmas tree.

Hobbs...

Take her in for questioning.

You're going to need to come with me, Ms. Harrison.

Hobbs, please. Ashley, I tried to explain last night.

You were sleeping.

I trusted you.

I'm sorry.

Agent Sutherland,

you're no longer needed on this case.

[Dash]: I didn't want this to happen, Ashley.

This way.

[mom]: Oh, honey, it sounds like something out of a movie.

I just can't put my finger on which one.

A disaster movie.

Oh, now...

Of course, they let you go.

Think of it as an adventure.

Like that movie with the romance writer

in Mexico.

Colombia, Mom.

It's "Romancing the Stone."

Oh, that's the one.

Well, think of it like that.

And we got Little Blade in the bargain.

He's the best gift I could hope for.

So think of that.

Now, come help me make cocoa and cookies

for tonight.

You can't sulk all day.

No, I think I might.

[chuckles]

Mom, he lied to me.

[sighs]

I thought he was everything I wanted.

He was funny, and kind,

and handsome,

and a really good kisser--

Well, it doesn't matter anyways...

Of course, it matters, honey.

It was all a big fat lie.

He wasn't any of those things.

I wish that I had never met him,

and I wish that he'd never been born.

I wish his mother--

Did I tell you that his mother wasn't even his mother?

Did I tell you that?

Twice already.

Doesn't matter because he wasn't my type.

Hmm, I can see that.

Mom?

I lied.

He was everything

I've ever wanted.

I love him.

[♪♪]

Aw, sweetie...

Ashley...

There's nothing worse

than being sad at Christmas.

[♪♪]

Does he ever change the music?

["Blue Christmas" playing]

Afraid not.

Wow.

But, funny enough, you get used to it.

Nothing like a Christmas pity party.

I'm going to hit the hay.

You know, I never even got to convince her

that I believe in Santa Claus.

[sighs heavily]

Well, it's never too late.

No, you didn't see her face.

She'll never believe me.

I blew it.

Well, if you really believed in Santa Claus,

then you'd believe that miracles happen,

and that tomorrow is another day.

That's almost what she used to say.

Oh!

And we I.D.'d the perp

that stole Ashley's personal identification.

Her name is Damian Smith,

and I was right.

She looks nothing like your Ashley. and I was right.

She looks nothing like your Ashley.

♪ You'll be doing all right ♪

♪ With your Christmas of white... ♪

[whispers] "My Ashley."

[♪♪]

[carolers]: ♪ O, come let us adore Him ♪

♪ O, come let us adore Him ♪

♪ O, come let us adore Him Christ our Lord ♪

♪ Sing, choirs of angels... ♪

Come on now, honey.

Christmas will cheer you up.

I hope so.

Cocoa!

[chuckling fondly]

You guys are the best.

See?

So, how have you been?

Oh, you know, I keep myself busy.

Merry Christmas.

Well, we miss him.

Yeah.

Christianne...

Tree lighting isn't the same

without your dad giving the hay ride.

I know, I've been thinking about that all night.

Dad wouldn't want us to be sad.

Not tonight.

It's almost Christmas.

You know what he'd say.

"Show joy,

and joy will show itself to you."

Come on, now,

let's go light that Christmas tree.

It's time, my friends!

Who wants to start the countdown?

Ten!

Nine! Eight!

Seven! Six! Five!

Four!

Three!

Two! One!

Merry Christmas!

[all cheering and laughing]

♪ ...Making spirits bright ♪

♪ What fun it is to ride and sing ♪

♪ A sleighing song tonight ♪

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way ♪

♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride... ♪

Oh, my...

Look over there!

It looks like Jim Bennett's hay wagon.

Is that him?

Well, what are you waiting for?

Christmas?

I thought you might need

somebody who believes in you

right about now.

Just like my dad.

And now me.

And now me, Ashley.

If you'll let me.

There's nothing I want more in the world.

[♪♪]