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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.SubtitleDB.org today
2
00:00:50,840 --> 00:00:54,869
Binford Tools is proud to present
Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor.
3
00:00:57,679 --> 00:00:59,350
Thank you. Thank you very much.
4
00:00:59,439 --> 00:01:02,390
Hey, guys. My show is on.
Come on and watch.
5
00:01:02,479 --> 00:01:04,189
No, thanks.
We're playing.
6
00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:06,069
- Oh… Jill.
- Yeah.
7
00:01:06,159 --> 00:01:08,829
I got a spot all warmed up on the couch.
Too/ Time 's ready to begin. Come on.
8
00:01:08,920 --> 00:01:11,189
- Couldn't get the boys to watch, huh?
- They were a little busy.
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00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:13,739
- So am I.
- Well, your loss.
10
00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:15,829
It's a great episode. Classic.
11
00:01:15,920 --> 00:01:19,390
I'm showing everybody
how to install a deadbolt lock. Yeah.
12
00:01:20,879 --> 00:01:22,189
…so let's get that taken care of.
13
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There you go. Hear that snap?
14
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That means it's on. Tool tip,
tool belt fashion tip from ol' Tim:
15
00:01:28,159 --> 00:01:31,469
Hike it up so you avoid that unsightly
butt crack, cos who wants to see that?
16
00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:34,060
Boy, there's nothing
like the feeling
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00:01:34,100 --> 00:01:37,989
of rawhide and cold steel
hanging on your hips.
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00:01:38,079 --> 00:01:43,000
My wife says when I put this bad boy on,
I turn into a wild, hairy, disgusting ape.
19
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You know what? I don't think
women understand the feeling
20
00:01:46,959 --> 00:01:50,150
of rawhide and steel,
vice-gripping, monkey-plier,
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00:01:50,239 --> 00:01:54,349
dado head, cut-flat, jig minor,
jig box, hot goo…
22
00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:57,150
Busy day, today.
23
00:01:57,239 --> 00:01:59,799
Al and I are gonna rough-in that house.
finish hanging that garage door.
24
00:01:59,879 --> 00:02:00,859
But first, we're gonna install
25
00:02:00,959 --> 00:02:03,030
a min-cylinder deadbolt
security lock in this door.
26
00:02:03,120 --> 00:02:04,709
- Morning. Al.
- Morning. Tim.
27
00:02:04,799 --> 00:02:08,469
Always follow your instructions.
Always makes jobs a bit easier.
28
00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:10,509
We've already laid out
with the template included in the kit
29
00:02:10,599 --> 00:02:13,349
where we're putting our holes.
Used my awl here to set my drill.
30
00:02:13,439 --> 00:02:15,819
All right, Al,
let's have the drill, please.
31
00:02:16,159 --> 00:02:19,509
Look at that butt crack
you got going there.
32
00:02:19,599 --> 00:02:23,949
I think we ought to start today
by spackling Al's butt crack shut, huh?
33
00:02:24,039 --> 00:02:26,189
With the new Patch-and-Paint
butt-crack filler putty.
34
00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:31,189
Hey. I smell voltage.
I think it's time to drill.
35
00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:36,349
Right. Tim. And we'll be using
the one-and-a-half-inch auger bit.
36
00:02:36,439 --> 00:02:40,629
Come on, Al. That's a girl drill.
We need a man drill, don't we?
37
00:02:40,719 --> 00:02:43,180
But Tim, this is the proper tool.
38
00:02:43,280 --> 00:02:46,069
Yeah. I bet it is, Al. You know, men,
when we want a job done right
39
00:02:46,159 --> 00:02:48,030
and we want it done quick,
what do we need?
40
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,789
More power.
41
00:02:49,879 --> 00:02:52,750
Darn right, more power.
Thank you, Lisa.
42
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:57,469
Now, there is raw power.
43
00:02:57,560 --> 00:03:00,349
This is the Binford series
heavy-duty, variable-speed drill.
44
00:03:00,439 --> 00:03:05,590
double reduction spur gearing,
1400 RPM, 6.8 amps.
45
00:03:08,879 --> 00:03:12,419
But you won't even be halfway
through your aug before you hear this.
46
00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:14,629
Honey, shut that thing off.
It's making too much noise.
47
00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:20,830
Always ignore that first plea.
Just makes her yell a little louder.
48
00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:23,300
Here she comes down the hall.
49
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:27,509
Shut that thing off. Do you have mud
in your ears, you big baboon?
50
00:03:27,599 --> 00:03:29,590
- Who's that supposed to be?
- Hey.
51
00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:34,469
- Is that supposed to be me?
- No, that's not you.
52
00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:37,710
Oh, what a relief.
Then who is it?
53
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:40,590
It's every wife.
54
00:03:41,159 --> 00:03:44,939
Yeah, yeah.
Well, you know. I happen to be a wife.
55
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Every wife but you.
56
00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:50,229
Stop it. You'll make me go
to the bathroom.
57
00:03:50,319 --> 00:03:51,789
Let me up. Let me up.
58
00:03:51,879 --> 00:03:53,389
No, you started this.
You're staying right there.
59
00:03:53,479 --> 00:03:55,939
No.
60
00:03:57,120 --> 00:03:59,870
No, really. I have a blouse in the dryer.
I have to get that out. Let me go.
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00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:01,270
Help.
62
00:04:01,360 --> 00:04:03,150
Tim, would you go see
who's killing who out there?
63
00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:06,069
I can only imagine. Randy, what are you
doing to your younger brother?
64
00:04:06,159 --> 00:04:08,389
I'm just hanging him
from the junglegym.
65
00:04:08,479 --> 00:04:10,629
- Help.
- Don't do that.
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00:04:10,719 --> 00:04:11,860
He likes it.
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00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:13,229
Randy, you let go of that rope
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00:04:13,319 --> 00:04:15,430
or I'm gonna hot-glue your
little head to the garage door.
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00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:19,709
- No running in the house.
- Brad!
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00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:23,069
Cover the ball with both hands
so you don't fumble. Go on.
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00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:25,069
Tim.
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00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:27,750
And do as your mother says.
Don't run in the house.
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00:04:27,839 --> 00:04:29,790
- I'll be back.
- Where are you going?
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00:04:29,879 --> 00:04:32,910
"Sears Summer Spectacular Sale."
75
00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:35,949
You can't go.
I've got this job interview.
76
00:04:36,040 --> 00:04:39,819
- What job interview?
- I have been telling you this all week.
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00:04:39,920 --> 00:04:42,269
It's the personnel manager
at Kingman-Harmell.
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00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:43,829
You never told me about a job interview.
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00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:45,589
Tim, do you ever listen to me?
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00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:47,870
It was the last thing that I said
in bed to you last night.
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00:04:47,959 --> 00:04:51,629
No. I believe, if you recall, the last thing
you said to me in bed last night was.
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00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:54,180
"No."
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00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:03,420
You're thinking of tonight.
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00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:14,029
You split my sides.
You really do.
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00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:16,069
Is that my liver?
Look in there. Look at that.
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00:05:16,160 --> 00:05:17,990
You stop that.
I gotta be there in an hour
87
00:05:18,079 --> 00:05:19,870
and you gotta stay here with these kids.
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00:05:19,959 --> 00:05:23,990
- Fine. I'll be back in 20 minutes.
- 20 minutes? Who are you kidding?
89
00:05:24,079 --> 00:05:28,029
You'll be down there, drooling, fondling
all the tools, your eyes bugging out.
90
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:31,189
You don't even look at me like that.
91
00:05:31,279 --> 00:05:34,870
I would if you were mo speeds
and reversible.
92
00:05:35,759 --> 00:05:39,149
- Tim.
- You won't even know I'm gone.
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00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:43,629
Tim, walk out that door and this goes
in the trash compactor.
94
00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:47,069
That's my Binford power tape
with positive toggle lock.
95
00:05:47,160 --> 00:05:50,389
- Kiss it goodbye.
- Don't turn that on.
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00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:54,100
- Are you staying?
- Yes. God, you're mean to me.
97
00:05:56,600 --> 00:06:01,189
Aw, there's food boogers all over it.
98
00:06:01,279 --> 00:06:04,750
Since you're staying.
would you load the dishwasher?
99
00:06:04,839 --> 00:06:07,550
Why not?
Now that you've broken my spirit.
100
00:06:07,639 --> 00:06:10,269
Tim, this job is important to me.
101
00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:12,589
Aren't you excited about me
going back to work?
102
00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:16,990
- Yeah, sure.
- Yeah, sure.
103
00:06:17,079 --> 00:06:19,310
Could you maybe work up
a little enthusiasm?
104
00:06:19,399 --> 00:06:20,620
I'm sorry, honey.
105
00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:23,350
Gosh. I'm excited that you won't be
laying around the house
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00:06:23,439 --> 00:06:25,029
mooching off the boys and me.
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00:06:26,079 --> 00:06:29,149
Do the other side.
I'm your love slave.
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00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:32,189
- Is it OK if I go over to Tommy's?
- What?
109
00:06:32,279 --> 00:06:35,189
- Is it OK if I go over to Tommy's?
- Yeah, sure.
110
00:06:35,279 --> 00:06:38,310
Honey, don't put that in the dishwasher.
You have to rinse it off first.
111
00:06:38,399 --> 00:06:41,230
I gotta wash the dish
before I put it in the dishwasher?
112
00:06:41,319 --> 00:06:44,509
Yeah. That spray's not
strong enough for egg yolk.
113
00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:47,990
It would be if we had a man's
dishwasher…
114
00:06:48,079 --> 00:06:50,379
but, no, you insisted on
the Lady Sott Touch decor series.
115
00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:52,860
- Little tiny buttons that no man can…
- I am so sorry.
116
00:06:52,959 --> 00:06:55,149
The grunting-hairy-ape model
was sold out.
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00:06:55,639 --> 00:06:57,629
Just rinse the dish.
118
00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:03,069
You know, honey.
I could fix the spray on this dishwasher.
119
00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:07,870
- No. Tim. It's not broken.
- I know. It just needs more power.
120
00:07:09,199 --> 00:07:11,990
Every time you fix something
the fire department shows up.
121
00:07:12,079 --> 00:07:13,910
- This would be different because I got…
- No.
122
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,750
I am not gonna let you ruin
a perfectly good dishwasher
123
00:07:16,839 --> 00:07:18,589
just so you can get out
your tools and play.
124
00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:19,629
- Six horse…
- No.
125
00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:22,829
- One…
- No. No.
126
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:26,430
Play? I host my own
home-improvement show.
127
00:07:26,519 --> 00:07:29,709
Don't touch the dishwasher.
128
00:07:32,879 --> 00:07:37,110
Don't touch the dishwasher.
129
00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:39,589
I'll show her.
130
00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:43,550
Boy. I'll strap that old 427 side arm
V-8 on that son-of-a-B.
131
00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:48,269
Dual quads, Headman headers,
V-Cam, 700 horse
132
00:07:48,360 --> 00:07:50,430
blowing everything off
every dish in there.
133
00:07:50,519 --> 00:07:53,350
including that
little sissy flower pattern.
134
00:07:53,439 --> 00:07:55,629
- l heard that.
- Hey.
135
00:07:57,319 --> 00:08:00,029
This is my house,
that is my dishwasher,
136
00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:01,910
and I will rewire it if I want to.
137
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:07,230
No. You will not rewire it
and screw it up like you did the blender.
138
00:08:07,319 --> 00:08:08,790
End of discussion.
139
00:08:08,879 --> 00:08:10,790
What is your problem with the blender?
140
00:08:13,199 --> 00:08:17,230
It's the only blender on the block
that can purėe a brick.
141
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:23,350
Tim. I'm going to that interview.
I'll see you in a couple hours.
142
00:08:23,439 --> 00:08:26,149
Good luck, honey.
And remember what Knute Rockne said:
143
00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:30,269
- "Hit 'em low and hit 'em hard."
- I'll do that.
144
00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:34,629
Oh, and remember, honey.
Don't touch the dishwasher.
145
00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:36,950
Honey. I'm not one of the kids.
You only have to tell me once.
146
00:08:37,039 --> 00:08:38,549
Yeah.
147
00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:42,549
- Hey. Wilson.
- Hi. Tim.
148
00:08:42,639 --> 00:08:45,590
I'm gonna rewire that dishwasher. Do
you still have that compressor for sale?
149
00:08:45,679 --> 00:08:50,110
No, no, no. Traded that for a set
of snow tires and an accordion.
150
00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:53,269
- Shoot.
- Dishwasher broken, huh?
151
00:08:53,360 --> 00:08:55,710
No. I'm just gonna show my wife
who's man of this house.
152
00:08:57,320 --> 00:09:00,429
I told her I was gonna rewire
that dishwasher, she jumps all over me.
153
00:09:00,519 --> 00:09:03,629
- Sometimes I don't know about her.
- This isn't about her.
154
00:09:03,720 --> 00:09:07,149
- It's not?
- No, no, no. This is about you.
155
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:09,950
The reason you're
having problems with your wife
156
00:09:10,039 --> 00:09:12,909
is because you don't know
who you are as a man.
157
00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:15,990
I don't have a problem
in that area. Wilson.
158
00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:22,470
Not what I mean. Tim.
A lot of men feel lost, confused.
159
00:09:22,559 --> 00:09:26,100
You see. Tim, the industrial revolution
took the adult male out of the home.
160
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:30,710
Boys were left without an older man
to teach them how to be men.
161
00:09:30,799 --> 00:09:33,500
We need to get back
to something more primitive.
162
00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:36,509
Atavistic.
163
00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:42,149
Atavistic.
164
00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,990
How do you spell that?
165
00:09:44,919 --> 00:09:47,110
- Let's just say "primitive".
- All right.
166
00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:50,470
Men need to spend more time
around the campfire with their elders.
167
00:09:50,559 --> 00:09:53,389
like in ancient days, seeking wisdom.
168
00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:55,669
telling stories, sharing…
169
00:09:55,759 --> 00:09:59,429
- Would these men all have to be naked?
- No, no.
170
00:09:59,519 --> 00:10:02,149
No, that's optional.
171
00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:06,590
You see, Tim, it's time for men
to reclaim the male spirit.
172
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:11,990
I'm gonna start by reclaiming
that dishwasher.
173
00:10:12,080 --> 00:10:14,190
Mark, get your brothers.
We're out to Sears.
174
00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:19,940
All right. We gotta get this done
before your mom gets home, OK?
175
00:10:20,039 --> 00:10:22,990
Take a look at this bad boy.
176
00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:27,750
That's a Finley two-stage, five-horse
Blastmaster compressor.
177
00:10:27,840 --> 00:10:31,870
- All tubing inside is stainless steel…
- Dad, why are we doing this?
178
00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:36,429
Randy, it's a house full of men.
We're reclaiming the male spirit. Huh?
179
00:10:36,519 --> 00:10:38,029
By working on a dishwasher?
180
00:10:38,120 --> 00:10:40,950
It's either that or sitting around
a campfire telling stories naked.
181
00:10:45,200 --> 00:10:48,789
Where you guys going?
I'm kidding around.
182
00:10:48,879 --> 00:10:50,870
It's just you and me, Mark.
Unless you got something else to do.
183
00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:54,070
- No. I want to be with you.
- Great.
184
00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:09,789
- What are you doing?
- Getting naked.
185
00:11:09,879 --> 00:11:11,710
You don't have to get
all the way naked.
186
00:11:11,799 --> 00:11:14,179
All right, this is bare-chested men's
work. Come over here.
187
00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:19,230
All right. Sit down there.
188
00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:22,309
All right, first up.
Let's see them muscles.
189
00:11:36,320 --> 00:11:41,549
Yeah. I think you're ready for
your new Hank the Handyman tool belt.
190
00:11:43,240 --> 00:11:44,990
All right. Let's take a look at it.
191
00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:47,590
Little baby butt crack.
192
00:11:49,080 --> 00:11:52,779
All right. The number one rule
in home repair is safety.
193
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:57,549
We're gonna rewire a major appliance.
we gotta cut the electricity off. All right?
194
00:11:57,639 --> 00:11:59,629
Come on out here.
195
00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:03,750
There. That
196
00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:05,549
is the fuse box.
197
00:12:05,639 --> 00:12:08,350
The electrical nerve center of our house.
198
00:12:08,440 --> 00:12:11,269
- Wow.
- You're darn right, wow.
199
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,789
But now, we don't have to cut off
all the electricity.
200
00:12:14,879 --> 00:12:16,149
Just the section of the house
we're working on.
201
00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:17,950
That'd be the kitchen, up there…
202
00:12:18,799 --> 00:12:20,789
Kitchen…
203
00:12:21,799 --> 00:12:25,419
I shouldn't have labeled those
in pencil, should I?
204
00:12:27,639 --> 00:12:32,190
They're all faded and everything.
Look it… Well, kitchen's K…
205
00:12:32,279 --> 00:12:33,909
That's kitchen. There we go.
206
00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:37,620
All right, Hank the Handyman.
Come on. Let's go.
207
00:12:37,720 --> 00:12:40,509
We got to take off that access panel.
208
00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:42,710
All right.
209
00:12:44,159 --> 00:12:46,230
Look at all the wires in there.
210
00:12:48,039 --> 00:12:51,789
- Do you know what all those wires do?
- Yeah, of course.
211
00:12:51,879 --> 00:12:54,309
I wouldn't have taken it off if I didn't.
212
00:12:54,399 --> 00:12:56,750
Ground, we're looking to ground.
213
00:12:56,840 --> 00:13:00,309
Now, red is all…, red…
214
00:13:00,399 --> 00:13:03,549
Yellow, see…
The sun is yellow, it heats the ground -
215
00:13:03,639 --> 00:13:06,309
that's how they name stuff.
216
00:13:10,799 --> 00:13:13,149
Is that car all right?
217
00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:21,669
Shake it off.
218
00:13:31,960 --> 00:13:35,190
- Are you all right, Dad?
- Yeah.
219
00:13:37,919 --> 00:13:41,029
I did that to teach you
an important lesson.
220
00:13:42,960 --> 00:13:44,309
What's that, Dad?
221
00:13:44,399 --> 00:13:49,110
Well, when you work with electricity
it's a good idea to shut it all off.
222
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:50,470
Now follow me upstairs.
223
00:13:50,559 --> 00:13:53,120
I'll show you how to treat
a severe electrical burn.
224
00:14:03,519 --> 00:14:08,639
Hello? No. Jill's not here.
I'll take a message, sure.
225
00:14:10,879 --> 00:14:13,590
Really?
226
00:14:14,879 --> 00:14:17,509
Yeah. I'll tell her.
227
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:20,029
- Mom didn't get the job.
- She didn't?
228
00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:24,350
Nope. Listen, she's gonna
really need us now.
229
00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:27,590
When she gets home
she's gonna feel real sad.
230
00:14:27,679 --> 00:14:29,549
So, why don't you go upstairs
and wash up,
231
00:14:29,639 --> 00:14:32,230
cos she just loves it
when you're all clean.
232
00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:34,950
- Hey, Dad, Dad.
- Yeah, Randy.
233
00:14:35,039 --> 00:14:38,990
Look at this neat turtle shell.
I found it down at the creek.
234
00:14:39,080 --> 00:14:42,429
You didn't yank the turtle
out of there, did you?
235
00:14:42,519 --> 00:14:43,870
No.
236
00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:47,070
If I go down to that creek and find some
confused turtle swimming without a shell…
237
00:14:47,159 --> 00:14:49,950
Dad, I'm gonna go make it into a drum.
238
00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:56,909
Wilson that's the best part about being
a boy, is collecting all that useless junk.
239
00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,299
I wouldn't call it "useless". Tim.
240
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:02,789
The ancient Malaysians used
the turtle shell as an aphrodisiac.
241
00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:06,309
Turtle shell?
242
00:15:06,399 --> 00:15:09,940
Wouldn't that hurt putting it on?
243
00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:11,419
Tim.
244
00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:15,950
- I'm out here, honey.
- Tim.
245
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:19,950
Keep the boys off the phone.
I think I'm gonna hear about that job.
246
00:15:20,039 --> 00:15:21,259
- Honey, actually…
- I am so excited.
247
00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:24,750
Oh, gosh, you wouldn't believe it.
It was the best interview ever.
248
00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:26,870
- Really? Today?
- Oh, yeah. I nailed it.
249
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:29,750
There is no way on Earth
that I am not gonna get this job.
250
00:15:29,840 --> 00:15:33,429
The Earth is such a big place.
251
00:15:33,519 --> 00:15:36,269
No, really. You should've seen me.
I was so impressive.
252
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:39,669
I looked this vice president
right in the eye and I said…
253
00:15:40,879 --> 00:15:45,820
- Is that grease on your hand?
- No, that's an electrical burn.
254
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:49,350
Did you touch the dishwasher?
255
00:15:49,440 --> 00:15:51,309
Did I touch the dishwasher?
256
00:15:51,399 --> 00:15:53,029
- You're a dead man.
- Jill, hold on.
257
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:55,029
What did you do?
Show me what you did.
258
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:56,590
Boy, are you cute when
you're panickin'.
259
00:15:56,679 --> 00:16:00,710
That big vein in your forehead
just sticks right out.
260
00:16:01,320 --> 00:16:02,539
What the hell is that?
261
00:16:02,639 --> 00:16:04,750
That is the power source
to your new dishwasher.
262
00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:06,710
- Take it out. No, take it out now.
- No, no.
263
00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:08,710
You don't like the fact
that I improved the dishwasher.
264
00:16:08,799 --> 00:16:11,230
Remember that yolk that wouldn't
come o the plate this morning?
265
00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:13,309
Watch this.
266
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:20,870
Hear that hum? That's a Finley two-stage.
five-horse Blastmaster compressor.
267
00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:23,110
Air-delivery system is
18 cubic feet per minute.
268
00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:28,110
That should say "testosterone"
right on there, cos that…
269
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:30,470
that is a man's dishwasher.
270
00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:52,629
Hey. Mark, you didn't tighten
that hex bolt like I asked you to.
271
00:16:54,039 --> 00:16:55,750
- Whoa, neat.
- Stay away from there.
272
00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:57,590
I don't want you to get hurt.
There's broken stuff there.
273
00:16:57,679 --> 00:16:59,509
I'm gonna call Tommy.
He's got…
274
00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:01,980
No, don't use the phone.
I'm waiting for a call about my job.
275
00:17:02,080 --> 00:17:04,109
Daddy already got that call.
276
00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:10,910
- Sorry you didn't get the job, Mom.
- Mark.
277
00:17:13,680 --> 00:17:14,789
I didn't get the job?
278
00:17:16,359 --> 00:17:19,069
I wanted to wait for
the right time to tell you.
279
00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,390
And the dishwasher exploded -
that wasn't it.
280
00:17:24,839 --> 00:17:28,309
I am really, really sorry.
281
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:31,190
- You all right?
- I'll get the broom.
282
00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:37,950
You don't touch this.
I will clean all this up. I'll get…
283
00:17:38,039 --> 00:17:42,190
Hey. Look on the bright side, honey.
It wasn't a full load.
284
00:17:44,559 --> 00:17:47,430
I asked you not to touch the dishwasher.
But you didn't listen, did you?
285
00:17:47,519 --> 00:17:50,750
That's fine. I am not gonna get angry.
286
00:17:50,839 --> 00:17:53,589
I mean, it makes more work for me
but I don't mind.
287
00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:57,069
I like to work. It's just, you know.
too bad nobody'll hire me.
288
00:17:57,160 --> 00:18:00,029
- You don't have to feel bad.
- Don't tell me how to feel.
289
00:18:00,119 --> 00:18:02,470
- I'm just saying if it were me…
- It's not you, Tim. It's me.
290
00:18:02,559 --> 00:18:05,710
What I mean is you don't have to work.
291
00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:09,670
You don't really want me
to work, do you?
292
00:18:09,759 --> 00:18:11,109
No, no, no.
293
00:18:11,200 --> 00:18:14,430
- I make enough money for both of us.
- No, this is not about money.
294
00:18:14,519 --> 00:18:19,380
This is about me having a life
outside of this house. My autonomy.
295
00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:20,750
- Your autonomy.
- Yeah.
296
00:18:20,839 --> 00:18:24,069
- How do you spell that?
- Don't start.
297
00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:26,670
- Sweetheart, what you gotta do…
- Oh, this is great.
298
00:18:26,759 --> 00:18:29,990
Now I gotta take advice from a guy
who prances around a TV studio.
299
00:18:30,079 --> 00:18:32,380
- grunting like a baboon.
- What does that have to do with…?
300
00:18:32,480 --> 00:18:35,670
While Miss Binford Tool girl
flashes her big headlights.
301
00:18:35,759 --> 00:18:39,380
- Lisa?
- No. Al.
302
00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:42,549
What does Lisa have to do with this?
303
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:44,869
She didn't take your job.
She's got a job.
304
00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:55,190
What?
305
00:19:03,839 --> 00:19:06,109
What a mess.
306
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:11,630
- Hiya. Tim.
- Hi. Wilson.
307
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,430
Boy, does that smell good.
Baby-back ribs?
308
00:19:14,519 --> 00:19:16,630
No, no, no. Squirrel.
309
00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:21,990
I tell you, Tim,
this is what it's all about -
310
00:19:22,079 --> 00:19:25,430
catch-of-the-day cooking,
sun setting,
311
00:19:25,519 --> 00:19:28,869
men standing around the campfire,
telling stories.
312
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:33,190
- You mind if I tell you a story, Wilson?
- Campfire's lit, good neighbor.
313
00:19:33,279 --> 00:19:37,160
Jill didn't get the job she wants.
I tell her not to feel bad,
314
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:41,600
she gets angry.
315
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:44,430
All right, so then I tell her
what she should do,
316
00:19:44,519 --> 00:19:48,220
she jumps all over me
and then walks away.
317
00:19:48,319 --> 00:19:51,269
Sounds like you were having
an asymmetrical conversation.
318
00:19:51,359 --> 00:19:56,269
Asymmetrical.
How do you spell that?
319
00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:58,309
Let's just say "one-sided".
320
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:01,309
You see, Tim, by nature
men are problem solvers
321
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:03,630
but Jill didn't want you
to solve her problem.
322
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:05,309
- She didn't?
- No, no, no.
323
00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:08,589
She just wanted you to listen
while she shared her feelings.
324
00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:12,710
Just stand there and listen?
Wouldn't that be like not doing anything?
325
00:20:12,799 --> 00:20:15,750
Sometimes the best thing
you can do, Tim, is nothing.
326
00:20:19,279 --> 00:20:22,549
Jill got mad at me
because I didn't listen to her.
327
00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:23,950
No. I think she got mad at you
328
00:20:24,039 --> 00:20:26,599
cos you blew up
the damn dishwasher.
329
00:20:31,599 --> 00:20:36,509
People often ask me, they say:
"Tim, why is your show so darn popular?"
330
00:20:36,599 --> 00:20:39,430
I tell you what I think.
I think that working with your hands
331
00:20:39,519 --> 00:20:44,380
puts you in touch with something
primitive, almost atavistic.
332
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:50,150
It's almost like reclaiming
the male spirit, if you will.
333
00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:52,869
I think you know
where I'm headed with this one.
334
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:56,500
I'm talking about a masculinism -
a flat-out, big-pectoral,
335
00:20:56,599 --> 00:20:59,269
Look-at-my-deltoids, hairy-chested
celebration of men.
336
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:06,589
But this wouldn't be anti-female.
No, no, it's wrong to think that.
337
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:09,509
Just like this sander
338
00:21:09,599 --> 00:21:12,710
vibrates in harmony
with the grain of the wood,
339
00:21:12,799 --> 00:21:16,579
we men should learn how to vibrate
340
00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:20,509
in harmony with our wives.
341
00:21:20,599 --> 00:21:23,029
so, if ya…
342
00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:29,420
if you have an occasion,
have a disagreement with your wife,
343
00:21:29,519 --> 00:21:34,230
you should be man enough
to not be asymmetrical.
344
00:21:34,319 --> 00:21:36,430
Because that would be one-sided.
345
00:21:36,519 --> 00:21:42,509
But you should be man enough
to look at her and say, "I'm sorry, Jill…"
346
00:21:42,599 --> 00:21:45,109
Or Betty or Ruth
or whatever her name would be.
347
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:49,589
Anyway, let's finish sanding that table.
348
00:21:49,680 --> 00:21:53,549
What you said on the show today
was really sweet, Tim.
349
00:21:54,119 --> 00:21:58,670
I don't know if you noticed, but your name
is Jill, and I used the name Jill.
350
00:21:59,279 --> 00:22:01,549
Maybe you caught
the hidden double meaning.
351
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:04,750
It was subtle, dear, but I did grasp it.
352
00:22:04,839 --> 00:22:08,309
- Am I forgiven?
- Yeah. Forgiven.
353
00:22:09,839 --> 00:22:12,869
Well, that's it for me,
Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor.
354
00:22:12,960 --> 00:22:14,990
I'll finish up today with today's
household tip.
355
00:22:15,079 --> 00:22:17,829
A very important one,
as all of my tips are.
356
00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:20,829
Remember folks, always -
and I do mean always -
357
00:22:20,920 --> 00:22:24,869
label that fuse box in ink.
358
00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:27,069
See ya.
359
00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:34,910
You know, Jill, I still think
you're making a big mistake
360
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:36,910
not letting me install that dishwasher.
361
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,750
- I have other plans for you.
- You do?
362
00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:45,109
Yeah. When was the last time
that we spent any serious time together
363
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:46,910
in the back seat of a car?
364
00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:50,509
When Brad threw up that pizza.
365
00:22:50,599 --> 00:22:54,109
No, no, really. If you apologized to me,
I think I should apologize to you.
366
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:55,789
- Really?
- Yeah, and I really wanna do it right.
367
00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:57,099
Yeah?
368
00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:59,500
Back seat?
369
00:22:59,599 --> 00:23:02,670
Garage? Just like our honeymoon?
370
00:23:05,599 --> 00:23:08,230
Here, let me get that.
371
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:10,069
And that.
372
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:14,150
This Handsaver Lady Sott Touch
is one of our most popular models.
373
00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:19,710
Hey, let me in.
374
00:23:19,799 --> 00:23:23,069
Hey, lady, there's a crazy man
in your back yard.
375
00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:28,349
Wait a minute. Isn't that the guy
with the tool show on TV?
376
00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:31,390
Hey. Let me in.
377
00:23:32,799 --> 00:23:34,950
Stop waving at me.
Her. Get her.
378
00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:36,950
What's he doing now?
379
00:23:37,039 --> 00:23:39,990
I think he's tying to reclaim
his male spirit.
380
00:23:40,305 --> 00:23:46,488
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