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1
00:00:08,179 --> 00:00:09,679
(SNARLING)
2
00:00:12,643 --> 00:00:14,193
Okay, Ravi, your turn!
3
00:00:14,585 --> 00:00:16,515
Here I go. Here I go!
4
00:00:17,118 --> 00:00:19,348
Anyone else want to go?
5
00:00:19,550 --> 00:00:21,620
Come on, Ravi, it's fun.
Trust me.
6
00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:23,692
What are you afraid of?
7
00:00:23,694 --> 00:00:27,204
Rope, jumping,
and any scenario where
Luke tells me to trust him.
8
00:00:29,029 --> 00:00:30,559
(SHRIEKS)
9
00:00:30,561 --> 00:00:32,401
(RAVI GROANS)
10
00:00:32,703 --> 00:00:34,273
Did I win?
11
00:00:35,736 --> 00:00:39,536
Excuse me, I've been
watching you guys
for a while, and...
12
00:00:39,540 --> 00:00:42,240
Stranger danger!
Stranger danger!
13
00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:44,724
Initiate scenario two!
14
00:00:44,715 --> 00:00:46,745
Stop, drop, and roll!
15
00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:50,678
That... That's scenario five,
in case of a fire!
16
00:00:51,322 --> 00:00:52,522
Oh, my bad.
17
00:00:52,723 --> 00:00:55,733
Guys, relax!
I'm Corinne Baxter,
18
00:00:55,726 --> 00:00:57,686
award-winning TV producer.
19
00:00:57,688 --> 00:00:59,528
Ooh, you should meet
our butler.
20
00:00:59,530 --> 00:01:02,130
He's an award-winning
TV watcher.
Ooh.
21
00:01:02,493 --> 00:01:05,573
I'm producing
a new reality show about
families with nannies...
22
00:01:05,566 --> 00:01:08,166
Oh, I... I'm a nanny,
and this is my family!
23
00:01:08,169 --> 00:01:09,539
Smile everyone!
24
00:01:09,540 --> 00:01:11,300
JESSIE: Aren't they adorable?
25
00:01:11,602 --> 00:01:14,582
So, I assume you're
interested in being on...
Yes! (GASPS)
26
00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:17,345
I cannot believe
I'm going to have
my own TV series!
27
00:01:17,348 --> 00:01:19,778
I've got to go call
everyone I know!
28
00:01:19,780 --> 00:01:21,180
Hey, Darla!
29
00:01:23,354 --> 00:01:25,664
Did your nanny just leave
without you guys?
30
00:01:27,658 --> 00:01:30,618
You did not say
it was a show
about good nannies.
31
00:01:32,563 --> 00:01:35,633
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh
32
00:01:35,626 --> 00:01:39,396
♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie
33
00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:42,870
♪ It feels like a party
every day
34
00:01:42,873 --> 00:01:46,583
♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie
35
00:01:46,577 --> 00:01:50,107
♪ But they keep on pulling
me every which way
36
00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:53,440
♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie
37
00:01:53,444 --> 00:01:56,894
♪ My whole world is changing
Turning around
38
00:01:56,887 --> 00:02:00,517
♪ They got me going crazy
Yeah, they're shaking
the ground
39
00:02:00,521 --> 00:02:04,701
♪ But they took a chance
on the new girl in town
40
00:02:04,695 --> 00:02:07,895
♪ And I don't want to let them
down, down, down
41
00:02:07,898 --> 00:02:11,658
♪ Hey Jessie
42
00:02:11,662 --> 00:02:15,242
♪ Hey Jessie
43
00:02:15,236 --> 00:02:18,666
♪ It feels like a party
every day
44
00:02:18,669 --> 00:02:22,669
♪ Hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, Jessie ♪
45
00:02:26,647 --> 00:02:29,377
Guys! I think the first
episode of the reality show
46
00:02:29,380 --> 00:02:32,280
should be the party
you're throwing me for my
two year nanniversary!
47
00:02:32,283 --> 00:02:33,553
What's that?
48
00:02:33,554 --> 00:02:36,394
The anniversary
of my becoming your nanny.
49
00:02:36,387 --> 00:02:38,787
Since when is that a thing?
We didn't celebrate it
last year.
50
00:02:39,190 --> 00:02:42,660
Exactly. And here is your
chance to erase that pain.
51
00:02:44,465 --> 00:02:47,535
I think the first show
should star me
and my dance moves.
52
00:02:47,538 --> 00:02:49,398
I'll be more popular
with the ladies
53
00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:51,540
than Ryan Gosling
holding a puppy.
54
00:02:51,542 --> 00:02:53,442
ALL: Aw.
55
00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:54,684
See?
56
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,445
Sorry, what?
57
00:02:56,447 --> 00:02:59,347
I was just picturing
Ryan Gosling holding a puppy.
58
00:02:59,610 --> 00:03:01,250
It is adorable.
59
00:03:02,483 --> 00:03:04,593
And I'm going to come up
with a catchphrase,
60
00:03:04,585 --> 00:03:07,615
then print it on everything
from mugs to diapers.
61
00:03:07,618 --> 00:03:10,488
I'll get them drinking
and stinking!
62
00:03:11,562 --> 00:03:16,372
As tasteful as a soiled diaper
with "mmm-hmm" emblazoned
upon it would be,
63
00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:19,828
doing this show
would be a huge mistake.
64
00:03:20,271 --> 00:03:23,331
I give you two words.
Heisenberg Principle.
65
00:03:23,604 --> 00:03:26,544
Can you give us two words
we can understand?
66
00:03:26,537 --> 00:03:28,907
I am sure Jessie comprehends
what I am saying.
67
00:03:29,910 --> 00:03:31,440
Of course I do.
68
00:03:31,442 --> 00:03:34,592
But, why don't you
break it down?
Just for the kids.
69
00:03:34,845 --> 00:03:36,845
The Heisenberg Principle
states that
70
00:03:36,847 --> 00:03:38,547
once the camera is introduced,
71
00:03:38,549 --> 00:03:40,919
people cannot help,
but change their behavior.
72
00:03:40,921 --> 00:03:44,531
Witness every dope who has
ever been on a reality show.
73
00:03:44,525 --> 00:03:46,555
Who cares?
Those dopes are famous!
74
00:03:46,557 --> 00:03:48,597
And momma wants
a big slice of that.
75
00:03:52,603 --> 00:03:55,613
Bertram, it's 4:00.
You're going to sleep already?
76
00:03:55,606 --> 00:03:57,706
No, I just woke up.
77
00:03:58,439 --> 00:04:01,409
You know, Mom and Dad
will be watching
this reality show.
78
00:04:01,412 --> 00:04:02,842
Don't you want them to see
how hard you work?
79
00:04:04,475 --> 00:04:05,745
(ALL LAUGHING)
80
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:11,679
Ah, seriously, though,
I better clean this place up.
81
00:04:11,682 --> 00:04:14,432
I'm gonna go look for the
vroom-vroomy thing.
82
00:04:19,460 --> 00:04:22,530
Ugh, this bug bite
kept me up all night.
83
00:04:24,565 --> 00:04:25,995
What a pity.
84
00:04:25,996 --> 00:04:29,366
Are you ready
for a lovely breakfast,
and your close-up?
85
00:04:30,341 --> 00:04:31,701
Good morning!
(SCREAMS)
86
00:04:31,702 --> 00:04:34,682
(STAMMERING) I'm in the middle
of a beauty treatment!
87
00:04:34,675 --> 00:04:36,345
It ain't working.
88
00:04:37,978 --> 00:04:40,048
(FORCING LAUGHTER)
89
00:04:40,611 --> 00:04:42,811
You're two hours early.
90
00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:45,724
CORINNE: Are we?
91
00:04:45,716 --> 00:04:47,316
Oopsie.
92
00:04:47,688 --> 00:04:50,418
Don't you worry your messy
little head about us.
93
00:04:50,421 --> 00:04:53,561
We're just here to capture
who you really are.
94
00:04:53,564 --> 00:04:55,004
Oh, well!
95
00:04:54,995 --> 00:04:57,625
Who I really am
is an actress.
96
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,699
(DRAMATICALLY)
No, no, no!
97
00:05:01,702 --> 00:05:03,502
This yogurt has...
98
00:05:03,504 --> 00:05:04,884
Expired!
99
00:05:06,407 --> 00:05:08,707
Alas, poor yogurt!
100
00:05:08,709 --> 00:05:10,439
I knew it well.
101
00:05:10,681 --> 00:05:11,681
(DRAMATIC SOBBING)
102
00:05:13,684 --> 00:05:15,694
I don't know what's
more ridiculous.
103
00:05:15,686 --> 00:05:19,446
Your acting, or the fact
that you have a salad fork
stuck in your hair.
104
00:05:23,624 --> 00:05:26,504
And now, for the most
gratifying part of my day.
105
00:05:26,497 --> 00:05:29,357
When my beloved charges
come home from school.
106
00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:32,360
Which reminds me
of when I played Maria
in The Sound of Music.
107
00:05:32,363 --> 00:05:33,663
CORINNE: Please,
don't start singing...
108
00:05:34,405 --> 00:05:35,735
...again.
109
00:05:36,637 --> 00:05:39,737
The Fort Tavey Gazette
said I was, and I quote,
110
00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:41,540
"Entirely adequate!"
111
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:47,454
Uh, and now we are
getting off the elevator
112
00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:50,078
after a long, hard day
of learning.
113
00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:52,380
And now we are walking...
114
00:05:52,383 --> 00:05:54,463
Walking, walking...
115
00:05:54,455 --> 00:05:57,655
And you're driving us
crazy, crazy, crazy!
116
00:06:00,030 --> 00:06:02,490
You don't have to narrate
everything we do!
117
00:06:02,493 --> 00:06:03,933
Especially, when I popped
that pimple!
118
00:06:03,934 --> 00:06:07,744
Did you really have to
make that "pssh" noise?
(SNORTS LAUGHTER)
119
00:06:08,639 --> 00:06:12,639
That epidermal explosion
needed no audio enhancement
from me.
120
00:06:16,006 --> 00:06:19,746
This is my playhouse,
and you're just living in it!
121
00:06:20,751 --> 00:06:21,981
Excuse me?
122
00:06:21,982 --> 00:06:23,712
It's my catchphrase.
123
00:06:23,714 --> 00:06:25,724
Make sure to get it
in the first episode,
124
00:06:25,716 --> 00:06:28,716
and I'll cut you in
for 10% of the merch.
125
00:06:28,719 --> 00:06:30,119
Mmm, money!
126
00:06:32,493 --> 00:06:34,733
Found it! (CHUCKLES)
127
00:06:34,725 --> 00:06:38,695
Did you know
there's a whole closet
full of cleaning supplies?
128
00:06:39,530 --> 00:06:40,970
People, please!
129
00:06:40,971 --> 00:06:42,701
I need you to act naturally.
130
00:06:42,703 --> 00:06:43,903
Of course!
131
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:45,614
Check this out!
132
00:06:45,606 --> 00:06:47,006
(GRUNTING)
133
00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:50,910
(GROANS)
134
00:06:51,612 --> 00:06:54,452
Now I know why they
call it "hard wood."
135
00:06:55,516 --> 00:06:57,546
Careful!
You're in my shot.
136
00:07:00,020 --> 00:07:02,590
Now, I will make everyone
yummy snacks.
137
00:07:02,593 --> 00:07:04,463
Much as my idol, Meryl Streep,
138
00:07:04,455 --> 00:07:06,455
to whom I have been
compared many times,
139
00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:09,497
did when she played
Julia Child.
140
00:07:09,500 --> 00:07:11,600
Who compared you
to Meryl Streep?
141
00:07:11,602 --> 00:07:13,502
Everyone!
142
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:16,665
Come, lovable scamps.
143
00:07:20,110 --> 00:07:21,670
This is a disaster!
144
00:07:21,672 --> 00:07:24,652
If I can't spice this up,
this show will be canceled
before it even airs.
145
00:07:24,645 --> 00:07:28,045
And I cannot go back
to producing monkey makeovers.
146
00:07:28,218 --> 00:07:32,648
I don't care how much
eyeliner you put on them,
they're just not pretty!
147
00:07:32,923 --> 00:07:35,933
Uh, hey, Corinne,
you're missing some
great stuff in here.
148
00:07:35,926 --> 00:07:38,786
I'm making lunch,
while acting out Hamlet,
149
00:07:38,789 --> 00:07:40,689
with an actual ham!
150
00:07:42,833 --> 00:07:45,573
I told you, just do
the things you normally do.
151
00:07:45,566 --> 00:07:46,836
Oh. This is.
152
00:07:46,837 --> 00:07:49,637
Last week I did
Macbeth- aroni and cheese.
153
00:07:57,047 --> 00:08:00,507
I'm Zuri, and I have
sass to spare!
154
00:08:01,782 --> 00:08:03,652
Please, no more catchphrases!
155
00:08:05,085 --> 00:08:08,815
So, I bet your sister Emma
drives you crazy!
156
00:08:09,259 --> 00:08:11,059
Huh?
No.
157
00:08:11,061 --> 00:08:12,961
But there's this girl
at school,
158
00:08:12,963 --> 00:08:16,673
she's a combination
of nasty and awful.
159
00:08:16,667 --> 00:08:18,527
She's nasty-ful.
160
00:08:19,229 --> 00:08:21,499
Ooh, a new catchphrase!
161
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,901
I'm gonna go print that
on a bunch of diapers.
162
00:08:25,706 --> 00:08:27,606
So, between us...
163
00:08:28,208 --> 00:08:30,838
What do you hate most
about your nanny?
164
00:08:30,841 --> 00:08:33,681
I love Jessie!
But I'll tell you
what I do hate...
165
00:08:33,684 --> 00:08:35,824
What, what? Spill it, sister.
166
00:08:36,787 --> 00:08:38,987
Fashion atrocities.
Like sweatpants,
167
00:08:38,989 --> 00:08:42,089
which are totes lame,
and supes embarrassing.
168
00:08:42,092 --> 00:08:45,802
Also, socks with sandals,
jackets with
too many zippers...
169
00:08:45,796 --> 00:08:47,656
You mean like mine?
170
00:08:47,658 --> 00:08:49,758
Exactly! You're welcome.
171
00:08:52,262 --> 00:08:56,772
So Ravi, what bothers you
most about your brother
and sisters?
172
00:08:56,767 --> 00:08:59,167
Nothing! I wish
I could shrink them,
173
00:08:59,169 --> 00:09:01,739
and carry them around
in my pocket.
174
00:09:01,742 --> 00:09:04,142
FYI, I am working
on the technology.
175
00:09:05,175 --> 00:09:08,645
Meanwhile, let me tell you
about my dear sister, Emma...
176
00:09:08,649 --> 00:09:12,219
Oh! (CHUCKLING)
Excuse me, I didn't know
you were filming here.
177
00:09:12,222 --> 00:09:14,022
Hi, Morgan! Hi, Christina!
178
00:09:14,024 --> 00:09:17,664
Just doing what I always do,
work, work, work! (CHUCKLES)
179
00:09:18,689 --> 00:09:22,629
The butler, on the other hand,
can be very tiresome.
180
00:09:27,668 --> 00:09:31,138
So, Jessie, I hear it's
almost two year nanniversary.
181
00:09:31,902 --> 00:09:35,052
You must be getting
so sick of this job.
182
00:09:35,045 --> 00:09:37,075
Oh, no, no, I love the kids.
183
00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:40,077
But I'm not just a nanny.
I'm also an actress.
184
00:09:41,111 --> 00:09:43,111
So you say!
185
00:09:43,113 --> 00:09:44,213
Constantly!
186
00:09:45,155 --> 00:09:46,815
Okay, what have I seen you in?
187
00:09:47,718 --> 00:09:49,318
Does this show count?
No.
188
00:09:49,319 --> 00:09:50,619
Then nothing.
189
00:09:51,662 --> 00:09:55,072
Ah, Jessie, I see
you're still filming,
190
00:09:55,065 --> 00:09:57,325
while I am hard at work.
191
00:09:57,828 --> 00:09:59,768
Okay, if Bertram
gets to pretend
he's a working butler,
192
00:09:59,770 --> 00:10:01,930
I get to pretend
I'm a working actress.
193
00:10:02,372 --> 00:10:06,842
BTW, go see Morgan Ross's
brilliant new movie,
Slugasaurus!
194
00:10:06,837 --> 00:10:10,007
(TV NARRATOR STYLE)
"It leaves a slimy
trail of terror!"
195
00:10:10,010 --> 00:10:11,740
So do you.
196
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,016
I cannot wait to watch
the first episode of my...
197
00:10:19,019 --> 00:10:21,089
I mean, our TV show!
198
00:10:23,093 --> 00:10:25,963
Aw, look. He fell asleep
mid-clean.
199
00:10:26,697 --> 00:10:27,957
I'll wake him.
200
00:10:28,358 --> 00:10:29,898
(BERTRAM SNORING)
201
00:10:30,661 --> 00:10:32,231
(SHOUTING) Bertram!
(SHRIEKS)
202
00:10:34,204 --> 00:10:37,674
Well, at least my face
is now dust free.
203
00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:41,768
All this work is really
getting in the way of my naps.
204
00:10:42,873 --> 00:10:46,183
You would think the 14 hours
you get every night
would be enough.
205
00:10:47,417 --> 00:10:49,747
I've seen cats sleep less.
206
00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:51,780
(REALITY SHOW THEME PLAYING)
207
00:10:51,782 --> 00:10:53,182
(GASPS) It's starting!
208
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:02,230
I may not know what I'm doing,
209
00:11:02,232 --> 00:11:04,362
but I always look good
doing it.
210
00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:08,666
Ladies, take a number.
211
00:11:09,700 --> 00:11:11,700
Then give me yours.
212
00:11:14,274 --> 00:11:16,314
Bedtimes are for suckers!
213
00:11:19,409 --> 00:11:21,949
Oh, are we rolling?
Should I speak now?
214
00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:24,923
(ALL LAUGHING)
215
00:11:25,786 --> 00:11:29,716
When you work for
Morgan and Christina,
it's no sweat!
216
00:11:34,164 --> 00:11:36,734
I'm a nanny
pursuing her dream...
217
00:11:40,801 --> 00:11:42,471
"...of becoming an actress!"
218
00:11:42,472 --> 00:11:44,102
They cut that part out!
219
00:11:44,104 --> 00:11:46,484
This TV show is supposed to
jump start my acting career,
220
00:11:46,476 --> 00:11:48,206
so I can finally
do something I love.
221
00:11:51,141 --> 00:11:54,891
Not, not that I don't cherish
every day with you guys.
222
00:11:56,787 --> 00:11:59,347
Let me tell you about
my dear sister, Emma...
223
00:11:59,750 --> 00:12:03,220
She is a combination
of nasty and awful.
224
00:12:03,223 --> 00:12:05,063
She's nasty-ful.
225
00:12:05,796 --> 00:12:08,056
Hey! That was mean!
226
00:12:08,058 --> 00:12:09,458
I didn't say that!
227
00:12:09,459 --> 00:12:11,299
Well, TV Zuri just did!
228
00:12:12,502 --> 00:12:15,812
And how to describe
my beloved sister, Zuri...
229
00:12:15,806 --> 00:12:18,236
Totes lame,
and supes embarrassing.
230
00:12:18,939 --> 00:12:20,769
What did you just say
about me?
231
00:12:20,771 --> 00:12:23,911
She said you were totes lame,
and supes embarrassing.
232
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:30,216
I didn't say it about Zuri!
I said it about wearing
socks with sandals.
233
00:12:30,220 --> 00:12:31,750
(GASPS)
234
00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:34,321
You told me I made them work!
235
00:12:34,324 --> 00:12:39,064
You will notice I made
no disparaging comments
about your excessive make-up!
236
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,829
BTW, the circus left town
without you.
237
00:12:42,893 --> 00:12:44,433
(LUKE SCOFFING)
238
00:12:44,434 --> 00:12:48,244
How dare you?
Oh, quiet, Bozo!
This is my part!
239
00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:52,770
When the ladies
see me dancing,
they'll be all over me.
240
00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:55,082
LUKE: Check this out!
(GROANS)
241
00:12:57,978 --> 00:13:00,548
I wouldn't have fallen
if Bertram wasn't vacuuming!
242
00:13:00,550 --> 00:13:03,210
Did you know
dust can get under furniture?
243
00:13:03,213 --> 00:13:04,923
This job is impossible!
244
00:13:06,516 --> 00:13:08,886
Why did they show
the one time I fell?
245
00:13:09,119 --> 00:13:12,319
Okay guys,
you're all overreacting.
It's just a TV show.
246
00:13:13,123 --> 00:13:15,403
(LAUGHING)
247
00:13:15,826 --> 00:13:18,826
I just scratched myself
in front of the whole country!
248
00:13:19,129 --> 00:13:21,169
Don't forget Canada.
249
00:13:25,035 --> 00:13:27,535
I can't believe I look
so bad on television.
250
00:13:27,537 --> 00:13:30,477
I mean, I looked fabulous,
but I looked bad.
251
00:13:31,541 --> 00:13:34,921
I can't believe I fell
in front of the whole country.
252
00:13:34,915 --> 00:13:36,285
Don't forget Canada.
253
00:13:37,988 --> 00:13:40,018
If only someone
would have warned us
254
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:42,290
that we might come off
looking like fools.
255
00:13:42,552 --> 00:13:45,202
Oh, wait! Someone did!
256
00:13:47,257 --> 00:13:50,597
Guys, relax. I doubt anyone
even saw it.
257
00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:53,560
Hey! You're those weirdos
from the TV show!
258
00:13:54,905 --> 00:13:57,005
Always nice to meet a fan.
259
00:13:57,537 --> 00:14:00,367
OMG, you're Luke!
You're my favorite!
260
00:14:00,370 --> 00:14:01,910
Why, thank you.
261
00:14:01,912 --> 00:14:04,952
So, uh, you girls don't think
I looked bad when I fell?
262
00:14:04,945 --> 00:14:07,575
(ALL LAUGHING)
Of course! You looked like
a total klutz!
263
00:14:07,577 --> 00:14:10,847
Even worse than that hot mess
in the socks with sandals.
264
00:14:11,922 --> 00:14:14,582
The hot mess has bunions!
265
00:14:15,986 --> 00:14:18,486
And you're the frumpy nanny!
Hey, scratch yourself!
266
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:21,029
(SHUTTERS CLICKING)
Will not!
267
00:14:21,331 --> 00:14:24,971
Hey, it's the mean queen,
and the dumb catchphrase girl!
268
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,065
Oh, yeah? Catch this.
269
00:14:27,267 --> 00:14:28,597
Luke, hold my hoops.
270
00:14:28,598 --> 00:14:30,468
(YELLING)
271
00:14:31,641 --> 00:14:34,641
Whoa, Emma was right.
Zuri is embarrassing.
272
00:14:36,006 --> 00:14:39,646
For the last time,
I was talking about Ravi's
hideous choice of footwear!
273
00:14:39,649 --> 00:14:41,009
(GASPS)
274
00:14:41,011 --> 00:14:43,511
Ooh, look, mean girl's
being mean again!
275
00:14:43,513 --> 00:14:45,563
(SCREECHING) I am not mean!
276
00:14:46,556 --> 00:14:49,916
Ow! You pummeled my piggies!
277
00:14:51,261 --> 00:14:53,061
Two can play at that game!
278
00:14:54,965 --> 00:14:56,195
(GRUNTING WITH EFFORT)
279
00:14:58,568 --> 00:15:01,598
Stand back, noodle arms!
I've got this.
280
00:15:05,275 --> 00:15:07,575
Guys, stop!
This is embarrassing.
281
00:15:07,577 --> 00:15:10,107
And I'm pretty sure
I have to pay
for all this food now!
282
00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:15,051
Thank goodness
Corinne was not here
to exploit my manly rage.
283
00:15:15,045 --> 00:15:16,485
Oh, I'm here.
284
00:15:16,486 --> 00:15:20,546
And this is going to make
a delicious promo
for next week's episode.
285
00:15:20,550 --> 00:15:22,490
We can't wait to watch!
286
00:15:23,323 --> 00:15:24,653
How do you sleep at night?
287
00:15:24,654 --> 00:15:27,334
Oh, warm milk
and great ratings.
288
00:15:28,158 --> 00:15:29,528
Thanks!
289
00:15:29,529 --> 00:15:32,559
Come back here,
you cold-blooded,
disgusting reptile!
290
00:15:32,562 --> 00:15:34,062
(MRS. KIPLING SNARLING)
291
00:15:36,636 --> 00:15:38,536
You're lucky
you're endangered.
292
00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:49,176
Good, you're back!
(ALL GROAN)
293
00:15:50,420 --> 00:15:52,220
Everyone still mad?
294
00:15:52,222 --> 00:15:54,652
(SING-SONG) I've got some
key lime pies for you
to throw at each other.
295
00:15:56,056 --> 00:15:57,556
And... Go!
296
00:15:57,557 --> 00:15:58,987
Okay, that's it.
297
00:15:58,989 --> 00:16:02,489
Your stupid reality show
has done enough damage
to this family.
298
00:16:02,492 --> 00:16:04,562
We quit!
(CHUCKLES)
299
00:16:04,564 --> 00:16:06,074
You guys can't quit.
300
00:16:06,066 --> 00:16:09,666
If you break your contract,
I'll sue you
for everything you've got.
301
00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:12,699
Fine by me!
I don't have anything!
302
00:16:12,702 --> 00:16:14,102
So, ha!
303
00:16:14,604 --> 00:16:16,614
Uh, Jessie? A word?
304
00:16:18,548 --> 00:16:23,408
Look, you may not be able
to afford more than
one topping on your pizza...
305
00:16:23,413 --> 00:16:25,993
But we are loaded
like a baked potato!
306
00:16:27,617 --> 00:16:30,017
Glad we're on the same page.
307
00:16:30,020 --> 00:16:33,120
See you tomorrow night
for your big nanniversary
dinner, Jessie.
308
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:36,273
And remember,
we're always watching.
309
00:16:43,373 --> 00:16:45,743
Zuri, did you just eat
one of those pies?
310
00:16:46,136 --> 00:16:47,236
No!
311
00:16:51,041 --> 00:16:54,241
Okay, now that we're
in the one place
with no cameras...
312
00:16:55,215 --> 00:16:57,145
Wait, where's Zuri?
313
00:16:57,547 --> 00:17:00,447
ZURI: (MUFFLED)
Buried under Bertram.
314
00:17:00,450 --> 00:17:01,690
(GROANS)
315
00:17:03,623 --> 00:17:06,033
What did you think
that poking was?
316
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,128
(STOMACH GURGLING)
Indigestion.
317
00:17:11,501 --> 00:17:15,071
Okay, so, since Corinne won't
let us quit the show,
318
00:17:15,065 --> 00:17:16,305
here's the plan...
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
319
00:17:18,568 --> 00:17:20,038
Really?
320
00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:22,571
(ALL GROANING)
321
00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:25,683
Okay, we can't give Corinne
anything to use against us,
322
00:17:25,675 --> 00:17:28,275
so from now on,
we just have to be
super nice to each other.
323
00:17:28,278 --> 00:17:30,248
I am nice!
324
00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:33,550
And if I hear one more
snarky remark
about my footwear,
325
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:36,193
someone will get a
bunion to the butt!
326
00:17:37,387 --> 00:17:39,627
Please. The last time
you tried to step
on a cockroach,
327
00:17:39,629 --> 00:17:42,159
it pushed you over
and took your lunch money.
328
00:17:42,592 --> 00:17:44,632
(CHUCKLES) Ravi's weak.
329
00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:48,696
This is exactly
what I'm talking about!
330
00:17:48,698 --> 00:17:50,498
Look, if we want to
get rid of Corinne,
331
00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:54,200
we have to be the nicest,
most polite people
on the face of the Earth.
332
00:17:54,704 --> 00:17:56,514
Okay!
(SCREAM)
333
00:17:56,506 --> 00:17:59,546
Get these out of my face,
or your head is next!
334
00:18:05,615 --> 00:18:07,855
Okay, that was an example
of what not to do.
335
00:18:12,422 --> 00:18:15,332
Jessie, your nanniversary
dinner is served.
336
00:18:15,625 --> 00:18:17,695
I do hope that later
you will regale us
337
00:18:17,697 --> 00:18:21,267
with one of your magnificent
dating stories.
338
00:18:21,271 --> 00:18:23,201
They are always so riveting.
339
00:18:24,474 --> 00:18:26,444
Oh, Bertram, you flatter me.
340
00:18:26,436 --> 00:18:30,476
And might I say
that you are a fine man,
with a sunny disposition,
341
00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:31,880
and no weird hobbies at all.
342
00:18:35,685 --> 00:18:39,645
Dear sister, would you care
for some more lemonade?
343
00:18:39,649 --> 00:18:41,589
Thank you, Zuri.
How kind of you.
344
00:18:43,523 --> 00:18:49,263
Allow me to serenade you all
with bird calls
to help aid digestion.
345
00:18:49,259 --> 00:18:50,659
I give you
346
00:18:51,331 --> 00:18:53,201
the haunting loon.
347
00:18:54,864 --> 00:18:56,644
(MIMICKING BIRD CRY)
348
00:19:01,811 --> 00:19:04,811
That is the worst loon call
I ever heard.
349
00:19:04,814 --> 00:19:07,384
And I worked on Loon Dynasty.
350
00:19:08,518 --> 00:19:09,878
I see what you're doing.
351
00:19:09,879 --> 00:19:12,619
You're trying to ruin my show
by acting all nice.
352
00:19:13,523 --> 00:19:15,633
We're just being ourselves
in front of the cameras,
353
00:19:15,625 --> 00:19:18,255
in full compliance
with our contract.
354
00:19:19,689 --> 00:19:21,259
And what's wrong
with being nice?
355
00:19:21,591 --> 00:19:23,431
(STOMACH GURGLING)
(GASPS)
356
00:19:23,863 --> 00:19:26,473
Wow, you do have indigestion.
357
00:19:26,466 --> 00:19:29,566
Seriously, it sounds like
The Last Days of Pompeii
in there.
358
00:19:31,571 --> 00:19:34,301
Face it, Corinne.
We're done being your puppets!
359
00:19:34,504 --> 00:19:35,514
JESSIE: Yeah.
360
00:19:35,905 --> 00:19:37,645
This family
may not be perfect,
361
00:19:37,647 --> 00:19:39,447
but we do love each other.
362
00:19:39,449 --> 00:19:41,549
And that's as real as it gets.
363
00:19:41,551 --> 00:19:42,811
Real?
364
00:19:42,812 --> 00:19:46,462
Reality shows
are about as real
as my expense report!
365
00:19:47,557 --> 00:19:49,387
My idiotic bosses
366
00:19:49,389 --> 00:19:52,919
and the knuckle-draggers
who watch these shows
expect drama!
367
00:19:52,922 --> 00:19:54,662
So, stop eating that food,
368
00:19:54,664 --> 00:19:56,704
and start throwing it
at each other!
369
00:19:58,498 --> 00:20:01,868
Don't you think your bosses
and the viewers
might be offended
370
00:20:01,871 --> 00:20:03,471
if they heard
what you just said?
371
00:20:03,473 --> 00:20:06,543
What, did you get that from,
"Duh Magazine"?
372
00:20:06,536 --> 00:20:08,406
Of course they would.
373
00:20:08,408 --> 00:20:11,738
But, I edit all the footage,
so no one
will see it, but me.
374
00:20:11,741 --> 00:20:14,811
I wouldn't be so sure
about that. Luke, now!
375
00:20:14,814 --> 00:20:16,224
Ha ha!
376
00:20:16,686 --> 00:20:18,446
Grab that memory card!
377
00:20:18,448 --> 00:20:21,348
That's how we do, son!
Beast! Yow!
378
00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:23,722
Emma!
379
00:20:24,254 --> 00:20:25,264
Jessie!
380
00:20:25,625 --> 00:20:27,495
No! Give me that!
381
00:20:27,497 --> 00:20:28,597
Ravi, go long!
382
00:20:28,598 --> 00:20:32,758
If that is a sports term,
it is totally lost on me.
383
00:20:32,762 --> 00:20:35,612
Just run, catch this,
and upload it to the Internet!
384
00:20:35,605 --> 00:20:38,005
CORINNE: (SHRIEKING) No!
385
00:20:38,007 --> 00:20:39,707
(SNARLING)
386
00:20:41,541 --> 00:20:43,641
Better run before
Mrs. Kipling gets real...
387
00:20:44,274 --> 00:20:45,854
Real hungry!
(SNARLS)
388
00:20:46,716 --> 00:20:48,646
(SCREAMING)
389
00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:51,620
You're all fired!
390
00:20:52,452 --> 00:20:53,622
Good riddance!
391
00:20:53,623 --> 00:20:54,853
I hope we never see you again!
392
00:20:54,854 --> 00:20:56,664
Unless you get a network show.
393
00:20:57,627 --> 00:20:59,757
I'll... I'll send you
my headshot!
394
00:21:01,891 --> 00:21:04,291
Hey, a girl's got to try.
395
00:21:05,735 --> 00:21:07,995
Well, at least now we can all
get back to normal.
396
00:21:07,997 --> 00:21:09,637
(SNORING)
397
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,770
(CHUCKLES)
Bertram already has.
398
00:21:14,644 --> 00:21:15,954
Well, you can't blame him.
399
00:21:15,945 --> 00:21:18,375
He did work three whole hours
this week.
400
00:21:21,010 --> 00:21:23,680
Aw, he's so cute.
401
00:21:23,683 --> 00:21:25,463
(STOMACH GURGLING)
402
00:21:25,815 --> 00:21:28,555
I think he's gonna blow! Run!
403
00:21:33,763 --> 00:21:37,033
Jessie, I know the reality
show didn't end up helping
your acting career,
404
00:21:37,026 --> 00:21:38,426
but look on the bright side.
405
00:21:38,428 --> 00:21:39,468
What would that be?
406
00:21:39,869 --> 00:21:41,899
I don't know. I was hoping
you had something.
407
00:21:44,674 --> 00:21:47,844
Well, it did bring us
closer together as a family,
408
00:21:47,837 --> 00:21:50,837
and I'm glad we can finally
get rid of these stupid
surveillance cameras.
409
00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:54,640
Me too. Now we can
just go back to being
ordinary kids.
410
00:21:54,644 --> 00:21:57,924
You know,
most ordinary kids don't have
two private islands.
411
00:21:58,618 --> 00:22:00,348
That is so sad.
412
00:22:04,424 --> 00:22:07,634
Zuri, I said collect
the cameras,
not destroy them.
413
00:22:07,627 --> 00:22:10,557
I know.
But breaking stuff is fun.
414
00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:13,630
On a related note,
you need a new lamp
for your bedroom.
415
00:22:14,964 --> 00:22:17,614
Jessie, come quick!
Corinne is back with her
camera crew!
416
00:22:17,607 --> 00:22:20,407
What? I'm going to do
the Texas two-step on her...
417
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:21,940
Hey! A party!
418
00:22:23,042 --> 00:22:25,882
ALL: Happy Nanniversary!
419
00:22:25,875 --> 00:22:29,575
Aw, guys...
I don't know
what to say, except...
420
00:22:29,579 --> 00:22:30,819
Who's "Jassie?"
421
00:22:32,922 --> 00:22:35,562
I'm sorry,
I'm still really tired.
422
00:22:35,555 --> 00:22:39,025
There's a 75% chance
I iced the cake with lard.
423
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:43,960
Guys, thank you so much.
424
00:22:45,134 --> 00:22:48,774
Look, I would not trade
the last two years
with you all for anything.
425
00:22:49,469 --> 00:22:50,739
Neither would we.
426
00:22:50,740 --> 00:22:53,140
I'd trade all of you guys
for a week in Key West.
427
00:22:54,644 --> 00:22:57,654
But let's have some
nanniversary cake!
(CHUCKLES)
428
00:22:57,647 --> 00:22:59,847
Aw, guys this is beautiful.
429
00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:01,810
Yep, lard.
32305
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