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1
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Hey Oh, happy day, happy day
Oh, happy day
2
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Oh, happy day, happy day
Oh, what a happy day
3
00:00:56,224 --> 00:00:58,784
Oh, happy day, happy day
Ooh, ooh, ooh
4
00:00:58,860 --> 00:01:01,556
Oh, happy day, happy day
Oh, yeah, yeah
5
00:01:01,629 --> 00:01:04,097
Oh, happy day, happy day
Oh, what a happy day
6
00:01:04,165 --> 00:01:07,259
Oh, happy day, happy day
Yeah, yeah
7
00:01:07,335 --> 00:01:12,329
Jesus, Jesus
Oh, my Jesus
8
00:01:12,407 --> 00:01:16,844
Jesus, Jesus, Oh, my Jesus
Wash my sins away
9
00:01:16,911 --> 00:01:20,904
Oh, happy day, happy day
Oh, yes it is
10
00:01:20,982 --> 00:01:24,349
He taught me how
11
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To walk
How to walk
12
00:01:26,487 --> 00:01:29,115
Fight and pray
13
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Fight and pray
Yeah, yeah
14
00:01:31,659 --> 00:01:35,720
And then rejoice
happy day, happy day
15
00:01:39,033 --> 00:01:43,231
Happy day
Oh, oh, oh, oh
16
00:01:43,304 --> 00:01:46,239
Ooh!
Oh, happy day, happy day
17
00:01:46,307 --> 00:01:48,400
Well, look what rolled in.
18
00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:52,537
You know, at first, I thought you was
old-ass Raisinet riding on a skateboard.
19
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:56,982
I'd like to come over there and choke the
life out of you right in front of Jesus.
20
00:01:57,051 --> 00:02:01,488
Sweet Lord, give me strength. Don't make
me have to whup nobody's head in church.
21
00:02:01,556 --> 00:02:03,490
Ignore him, Lord.
Ignore all his prayers.
22
00:02:03,558 --> 00:02:06,994
He ain't nothing, never did nothing.
Give him a stroke or something.
23
00:02:07,061 --> 00:02:11,430
Do you, Sherman Klump?
24
00:02:11,499 --> 00:02:13,763
Yes, I do.
25
00:02:13,835 --> 00:02:15,996
Indeed, I do.
26
00:02:16,070 --> 00:02:20,097
Oh, happy day, happy day Oh, happy
day, happy day Oh, yeah, happy day
27
00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:24,272
Happy day, happy day.
Happy day, my ass.
28
00:02:28,382 --> 00:02:31,351
Oh, he look handsome.
29
00:02:31,419 --> 00:02:35,014
Oh, my baby's finally getting married. Never
thought I'd live to see the day. Finally.
30
00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:41,918
Oh, here she comes,
here she comes.
31
00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:02,046
I'm gonna cry. I promised myself I'm
wasn't gonna cry. Now I'm gonna cry.
32
00:03:09,190 --> 00:03:12,023
Yeah, all right.
Dynamite.
33
00:03:12,093 --> 00:03:14,789
You may be seated.
34
00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:18,798
Oh, thank God.
Oh, thank God.
35
00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:30,105
I always knew he'd find
the right girl. Always knew.
36
00:03:30,177 --> 00:03:33,738
You see the Indian in her cheekbones?
Ooh! Sherman, Sherman. Sherman.
37
00:03:33,814 --> 00:03:36,248
Sherman, Sherman, Sherman.
Sherman! Oh, Lord.
38
00:03:36,317 --> 00:03:39,047
Shh, my baby's so stupid.
39
00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:41,816
Dearly beloved,
we have gathered here today...
40
00:03:41,889 --> 00:03:44,517
to join these two people
in holy matrimony.
41
00:03:44,592 --> 00:03:48,551
Praise the Lord.
The eminent scientist, Professor Sherman Klump...
42
00:03:48,629 --> 00:03:50,597
Mm-hmm.
and his longtime sweetheart,
43
00:03:50,665 --> 00:03:53,327
Denise Gaines.
Oh, Sherman.
44
00:03:56,337 --> 00:04:02,037
If anyone has any reason why these two
should not be wed, let him speak now...
45
00:04:03,978 --> 00:04:05,878
or forever hold his penis.
46
00:04:05,947 --> 00:04:09,041
Oh, Sherman.
47
00:04:09,116 --> 00:04:12,244
That's it, son. Show 'em
what the Klumps are made of!
48
00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:16,518
Sherman, put that away.
Sherman, calm down, baby. Save it for the honeymoon.
49
00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:22,922
Surprise!
50
00:04:24,832 --> 00:04:28,199
Hey, Sherman, calm down, boy.
What's wrong with you?
51
00:04:51,459 --> 00:04:54,451
This is some scar shit.
Yeah, like The Outer Limits.
52
00:04:54,528 --> 00:04:58,988
No, don't hurt yourself, baby.
You are coming with Buddy.
53
00:04:59,066 --> 00:05:03,969
No! No!
See you later, chunky butt!
54
00:05:04,038 --> 00:05:05,801
No!
55
00:05:05,873 --> 00:05:08,501
And then I wake up
in a cold sweat.
56
00:05:08,576 --> 00:05:12,307
How often do you have this
dream? More and more lately.
57
00:05:12,380 --> 00:05:16,316
You seem to be very fond
of this girl, Denise.
58
00:05:16,384 --> 00:05:18,852
My God, she is so special to me.
59
00:05:18,919 --> 00:05:23,356
But how's she gonna love me when I got Buddy
Love inside me? I wanna be perfect for her.
60
00:05:23,424 --> 00:05:26,291
Perfect?
No one is perfect, Sherman.
61
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:30,262
You need to understand that
Buddy Love is a representation...
62
00:05:30,331 --> 00:05:33,459
of the uninhibited,
hedonistic id.
63
00:05:33,534 --> 00:05:36,332
He is not a real person.
Buddy Love is real!
64
00:05:36,404 --> 00:05:39,339
Well, he was real, and he does
take control of me sometimes.
65
00:05:39,407 --> 00:05:41,739
You will never learn to
control him... Sherman!
66
00:05:41,809 --> 00:05:44,778
until you accept the fact
that he is apart of you.
67
00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:47,939
Yeah, and the best part too! And
I'll tell you something else, punk!
68
00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:50,848
All these diplomas on this wall
don't make up for the fact...
69
00:05:50,918 --> 00:05:53,716
that you got a little Vienna
sausage in your drawers.
70
00:05:53,788 --> 00:05:56,814
Is that why they call you
a shrink? - Shut up, fat a-
71
00:05:56,891 --> 00:05:59,985
Sorry.
72
00:06:00,061 --> 00:06:02,689
Yeah, yes. Session got a little outta
outta control.
73
00:06:02,763 --> 00:06:07,166
You see, we all have
a little Buddy Love inside us.
74
00:06:07,234 --> 00:06:09,828
Yeah. But we can't
let him rule our lives.
75
00:06:09,904 --> 00:06:12,464
You're in charge, Sherman.
Can you say that for me?
76
00:06:12,540 --> 00:06:14,508
I'm in charge.
Can't hear you.
77
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:16,475
I'm in charge.
Can't hear you!
78
00:06:16,544 --> 00:06:19,342
I'm in charge!
Sorry about that.
79
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:24,715
Yeah. Klump in charge! I'm in charge!
80
00:06:26,687 --> 00:06:29,383
He's right. I am in charge.
81
00:06:29,457 --> 00:06:32,392
Klump in charge. Yes, indeed.
82
00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:38,828
Good afternoon, ladies.
Yeah.
83
00:06:43,404 --> 00:06:46,498
Hey, Professor Klump. How's it
going? Fantastic. How about yourself?
84
00:06:46,574 --> 00:06:49,096
Yeah.
Klump in charge.
85
00:06:49,230 --> 00:06:51,562
Afternoon. Good day. Hi.
86
00:06:51,632 --> 00:06:53,566
How you doing?
87
00:06:53,634 --> 00:06:57,627
Wonderful day.
88
00:06:57,705 --> 00:07:01,471
Beautiful day, isn't it, Professor?
Bite me, old hag. Oh!
89
00:07:01,542 --> 00:07:06,639
What?
Uh, uh, I said, he likes me. Look at him wag.
90
00:07:06,714 --> 00:07:10,150
Hey, little fella.
See that little tail wagging?
91
00:07:10,218 --> 00:07:14,348
Have a good day. I'm
in charge. My goodness.
92
00:07:22,763 --> 00:07:26,199
Kinda hot today, huh, Professor?
You have no idea how hot it is.
93
00:07:26,267 --> 00:07:31,000
Hot! Nice and hot!
Oh, Professor! I loved your lecture the other day.
94
00:07:31,072 --> 00:07:36,738
Oh, thankyou.
Thankyou so much.
95
00:07:36,811 --> 00:07:40,110
You're the man. You're
the man. I'm in control.
96
00:07:41,515 --> 00:07:43,449
Yeah, keep tellin'
yourself that, bubble butt!
97
00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:55,957
It is theoretically possible
to isolate the elements...
98
00:07:56,030 --> 00:07:59,466
of an individual's
genetic makeup and separate them.
99
00:07:59,533 --> 00:08:05,028
Now someday, we may be able to locate an
unhealthy risk factor in our DNA and remove it.
100
00:08:05,106 --> 00:08:08,542
Excuse me. Beg your pardon.
101
00:08:08,609 --> 00:08:10,543
I'm sorry.
Excuse me.
102
00:08:13,547 --> 00:08:17,210
Whether this is advisable
is another question entirely.
103
00:08:17,285 --> 00:08:20,948
Oh, my eye!
Oh, Professor Klump.
104
00:08:21,022 --> 00:08:24,048
Oh! Professor Gaines,
how are you?
105
00:08:24,125 --> 00:08:26,389
I was hoping I might be able
to sit in on your lecture.
106
00:08:26,460 --> 00:08:29,952
I'm sure we can accommodate you
since you were so quiet coming in.
107
00:08:30,031 --> 00:08:33,159
Well, it's very hard
to be quiet...
108
00:08:33,234 --> 00:08:35,168
when you're lecturing
on genomic extractions.
109
00:08:35,236 --> 00:08:37,932
I think it's ver exciting.
Oh, lagree completely.
110
00:08:38,005 --> 00:08:41,736
Something about the way the nucleotides
cohere with the target sequence.
111
00:08:41,809 --> 00:08:44,835
Yeah. I always say, ifyou can't be
with the nucleotide that you love,
112
00:08:44,912 --> 00:08:46,937
cohere with
the one you're with.
113
00:08:55,022 --> 00:08:57,855
Yeah.
Uh, anyway as I was-
114
00:08:57,925 --> 00:09:00,758
Uh, I want those
lab reports on my desk.
115
00:09:00,828 --> 00:09:05,356
No excuses.
I'll see you next time.
116
00:09:07,601 --> 00:09:09,865
Professor Gaines.
117
00:09:09,937 --> 00:09:13,373
Oh, Professor Klump.
Yeah.
118
00:09:13,441 --> 00:09:18,003
Um, yes, I was, um-
I was wondering if you had a-
119
00:09:18,079 --> 00:09:21,378
Dean Richmond, we were-
Just having... a little chat.
120
00:09:21,449 --> 00:09:23,383
Don't be bashful,
Professor Gaines.
121
00:09:23,451 --> 00:09:26,045
Pound-for-pound, this big lug's the greatest
scientist on the planet.
122
00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:30,819
And let's be honest, pound-for-pound, he is a planet.
That's said with love.
123
00:09:30,891 --> 00:09:34,224
Did you get those goo-goo clusters I sent you?
Yes, I did, thank you,
124
00:09:34,295 --> 00:09:37,321
but I'm on a diet right now,
so I can't eat 'em.
125
00:09:37,398 --> 00:09:39,559
And it's working beautifully.
No, I'm telling you.
126
00:09:39,633 --> 00:09:43,967
When I came in, with this light and in that outfiit,
you could really think for a second that-
127
00:09:44,038 --> 00:09:46,973
Anyway, you said you had
something to show me.
128
00:09:47,108 --> 00:09:50,043
I am so excited about this, Dean.
You will be too.
129
00:09:50,111 --> 00:09:53,046
You got that?
Come on. Jason, where's our patient?
130
00:09:53,114 --> 00:09:56,106
Right here, Professor. Come on, boy.
131
00:09:56,183 --> 00:09:59,914
Now this is Buster. Buster suffers from
acute arthritis and diminished vision,
132
00:09:59,987 --> 00:10:02,012
which are both signs of advanced aging.
133
00:10:02,089 --> 00:10:05,490
We're gonna see if we can fix all of Buster's
problems right now, aren't we, Buster?
134
00:10:05,559 --> 00:10:07,686
Yes, we are.
This little experiment...
135
00:10:07,762 --> 00:10:11,528
makes use of Professor Gaines's brilliant
research on gene targeting.
136
00:10:11,599 --> 00:10:15,000
Now, if I've composed this formula properly,
137
00:10:15,069 --> 00:10:18,095
this should be most impressive.
138
00:10:18,172 --> 00:10:21,608
All right, Buster.
139
00:10:29,183 --> 00:10:31,117
Jiminy freaking Cricket!
140
00:10:31,185 --> 00:10:35,212
Sherman, this is amazing.
141
00:10:35,289 --> 00:10:39,521
You've just discovered-
The fountain of youth. This is huge.
142
00:10:39,593 --> 00:10:42,960
Do you have any idea
what you've done? This is unbelievable. We're rich.
143
00:10:43,030 --> 00:10:45,521
We're gonna have every
pharmaceutical-company in the world...
144
00:10:45,599 --> 00:10:47,032
lining up
to throw money at us.
145
00:10:47,101 --> 00:10:48,966
Of course, it all has to be
properly tested first.
146
00:10:49,036 --> 00:10:52,802
Exactly, yes. He makes an interesting
point. Here's another. Shut up!
147
00:10:52,873 --> 00:10:56,104
Besides, look at the little fella.
He can lick his own winky again.
148
00:10:56,177 --> 00:10:59,044
There's not a guy in the world
who wouldn't wanna do that.
149
00:10:59,113 --> 00:11:02,082
Klump!
Dean Richmond!
150
00:11:02,149 --> 00:11:04,242
The effect is only temporary.
I'm sorry, sir. You're sorry?
151
00:11:04,318 --> 00:11:07,446
Oh, my goodness. I'm just tring not
to think where that tongue has been!
152
00:11:07,521 --> 00:11:09,455
You all right?
153
00:11:19,467 --> 00:11:22,800
Klump, party of six, please.
Yes, and we're hungry.
154
00:11:42,923 --> 00:11:45,084
Mama, you know, you really look good.
Have you been losing weight?
155
00:11:45,159 --> 00:11:48,185
Oh, thankyou, baby, no, but I'm getting ready
to start a new diet.
156
00:11:48,262 --> 00:11:52,096
Have some of this ambrosia.
I don't even like ambrosia.
157
00:11:52,166 --> 00:11:54,760
Don't tell me you don't like
ambrosia. You had some before, and you liked it.
158
00:11:54,835 --> 00:11:57,497
Have some adventure!
Oh, now I'm a child- I don't know what I like.
159
00:11:57,571 --> 00:11:59,562
...for the all-girls soccer team.
160
00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:02,473
Let me get that for you.
Oh, my baby's so gallant.
161
00:12:02,543 --> 00:12:06,946
Sherman, come here.
And it's called "All the pork you can eat" diet.
162
00:12:07,014 --> 00:12:11,212
You can have all the pork you want.
You can have ham, bacon, sausage.
163
00:12:11,285 --> 00:12:14,083
I got the wrong thing.
Take that. Thank you.
164
00:12:14,154 --> 00:12:16,418
Now I got a full portion.
Whateveryou wanna eat,
165
00:12:16,490 --> 00:12:18,424
just as long as you have three glasses
of grapefruit juice afterwards...
166
00:12:18,492 --> 00:12:21,256
because the grapefruitjuice
breaks down all the unwanted-
167
00:12:21,328 --> 00:12:25,196
Get away from there!
Stop that! Baby!
168
00:12:25,266 --> 00:12:28,724
Honey, get the baby. He's a boy, and boys
don't be doing stuff like that.
169
00:12:28,802 --> 00:12:31,999
Hey! Get your ass-
What?
170
00:12:32,072 --> 00:12:34,734
Please teach that boy manners.
He ain't gonna be acting like no hooligan with me.
171
00:12:34,808 --> 00:12:37,743
That was a spoon or fork? That was a
spoon. All right. Boys will be boys.
172
00:12:37,811 --> 00:12:40,871
Boys will be boys.
173
00:12:40,948 --> 00:12:44,179
Oh, this looks fabulous.
Yeah, it looks really good.
174
00:12:44,251 --> 00:12:46,617
How about getting another bottle of
red over here? Get some more wine.
175
00:12:46,687 --> 00:12:49,588
Hey, Ernie, maybe you wanna pace
yourself and take it easy, huh?
176
00:12:49,657 --> 00:12:53,388
Pace myself? Hey, this is a
celebration for Daddy retiring.
177
00:12:53,460 --> 00:12:57,920
We owe it to Daddy togetshit-faced,
andl'm gonnagetshit-faced.
178
00:12:57,998 --> 00:13:00,330
By the way, congratulations, Mr. Klump.
179
00:13:00,401 --> 00:13:03,996
She's so polite. Look here, Denise, you
have to stop that "Mr. Klump" stuff...
180
00:13:04,071 --> 00:13:06,835
'cause I've been hearing that
for the last year or so, and I'm starting to feel old.
181
00:13:06,907 --> 00:13:10,206
I ain't an oldman.
You are an old man.
182
00:13:10,277 --> 00:13:12,939
Ah, shit, Grandma,
what's wrong with you?
183
00:13:13,013 --> 00:13:15,208
If it isn't the Alzheimer's Express
right on schedule!
184
00:13:15,282 --> 00:13:18,115
Stop that! Hi, Mama.
She drove right on my bunion.
185
00:13:18,185 --> 00:13:21,120
Y'all have to excuse me
for being late.
186
00:13:21,188 --> 00:13:23,884
If you weren't my grandmother, boy-
If you weren't my grandmother!
187
00:13:23,958 --> 00:13:26,222
Me and Isaac started getting
kinda frisky in the car.
188
00:13:26,293 --> 00:13:29,421
Ooh!
Had to give him a little appetizer.
189
00:13:29,496 --> 00:13:32,056
Ooh, Mama.
190
00:13:32,132 --> 00:13:35,624
I just lost my damn appetite.
Mama, your dress is undone. Let me zip you up.
191
00:13:35,703 --> 00:13:38,137
Hurry. Zip herup in the back
before she starts looking...
192
00:13:38,205 --> 00:13:40,173
like one of them Zulu hags on the cover
of NationalGeographic.
193
00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:44,370
Clesius, what's wrong with you? That's my mother.
Like that movie, Shaka Zulu.
194
00:13:44,445 --> 00:13:47,471
You know something, Clesius?
Come on. Come on right now!
195
00:13:47,548 --> 00:13:50,073
I'm gonna tell you something.
I got a razor in this bag.
196
00:13:50,150 --> 00:13:53,950
Oh, yeah, I'll tell you what.
That ain't even no bag in yourhand. That's your titty.
197
00:13:54,021 --> 00:13:57,286
Clesius!
Oh, Jesus!
198
00:13:57,358 --> 00:14:01,089
She's an old bag with old bag titties.
Clesius, you out of your mind?
199
00:14:01,161 --> 00:14:04,221
He called your grandma's titty
a bag.
200
00:14:04,298 --> 00:14:06,926
Death!
Clesius Marcellus Klump.
201
00:14:07,001 --> 00:14:11,404
If it isn't the world's
oldest living Negro?
202
00:14:11,472 --> 00:14:13,906
Hey, how are things going
on the Underground Railroad, Isaac?
203
00:14:13,974 --> 00:14:16,807
Oh, Clesius, please, be nice to Mr. Isaac.
Goodevening, Mr. Isaac.
204
00:14:16,877 --> 00:14:18,845
Come on and have a seat.
205
00:14:18,912 --> 00:14:20,937
Good evening, Mr. Isaac.
How you doing tonight?
206
00:14:21,015 --> 00:14:23,609
Isaac know I'm playing. I play with Isaac
all the time. You know I'm messing with you.
207
00:14:23,684 --> 00:14:26,619
Oh, yeah, you say
what you wanna say,
208
00:14:26,687 --> 00:14:31,420
but Isaac's still like a Brahma bull
when it comes to relations, right, baby?
209
00:14:31,492 --> 00:14:34,188
You know what they say?
You're as young as you feel.
210
00:14:34,261 --> 00:14:38,027
Well, I must be 197.
Klump, funny you should say that.
211
00:14:38,098 --> 00:14:41,829
Denise and I have been doing some research on aging,
which has proven to be promising.
212
00:14:41,902 --> 00:14:44,377
Ooh, Baby, don't belch in public.
213
00:14:44,511 --> 00:14:46,911
Grandma don't wanna hear
all that nastiness. He bringing the bass, huh?
214
00:14:46,980 --> 00:14:49,471
You plan to eat, you gonna be belching,
cover your mouth.
215
00:14:49,549 --> 00:14:52,416
Hey, look, your grandpa ate
a whole plate of beans,
216
00:14:52,486 --> 00:14:54,420
you don't see me doing
the ol' butt trumpet, do you?
217
00:14:54,488 --> 00:14:56,979
Thank the Lord.
We don't have to hear all that nasty imagery.
218
00:14:57,057 --> 00:15:01,460
Butts and trumpets.
I'm gonna tell my grandson what I wanna say.
219
00:15:01,528 --> 00:15:05,965
Hey, can we get some toothpick?
Some toothpick!
220
00:15:06,032 --> 00:15:09,968
If I wanna put a trumpet in my ass and run around
this restaurant and blow...
221
00:15:10,036 --> 00:15:11,970
"Hallelujah, Yankee Doodle,"
that's my business!
222
00:15:12,038 --> 00:15:14,939
All I'm hearing is trumpets and asses.
I don't wanna hear that.
223
00:15:15,008 --> 00:15:16,942
Hey! You watch it now.
224
00:15:17,010 --> 00:15:19,103
You reach over here again,
you gonna pull back a nub.
225
00:15:19,179 --> 00:15:21,647
Oh, Clesius, she's fine. I like that.
226
00:15:21,715 --> 00:15:23,842
Tell me, don't touch the chicken.
Don't be hitting on people.
227
00:15:23,917 --> 00:15:25,885
I don't be getting hit on,
Sherman, you know that.
228
00:15:25,952 --> 00:15:28,921
Better eat up, Isaac,
'cause you gonna need your strength.
229
00:15:28,989 --> 00:15:33,551
Yeah, later on, me and Isaac gonna watch
Mating Season on the Serengeti.
230
00:15:33,627 --> 00:15:36,858
Oooh!
Don't take a lot to get Isaac going.
231
00:15:36,930 --> 00:15:39,296
Time out! Let me call a time out on that.
Lord, my, my.
232
00:15:39,366 --> 00:15:41,834
I don't wanna hear about you old-ass geriatrics.
Oh, yeah, Clesius?
233
00:15:41,902 --> 00:15:45,463
Me and Isaac might be
dried-up geriatrics,
234
00:15:45,539 --> 00:15:49,498
but ain't nothing wrong
with Isaac's love tackle.
235
00:15:49,576 --> 00:15:52,807
Ooh, Mama.
Oh, snap now.
236
00:15:52,879 --> 00:15:56,542
Hmm? What's the matter, Clesius, cat got your tongue?
Step on a nerve, Clesius?
237
00:15:56,616 --> 00:15:59,346
I get you.
Got you, got you. Got ya!
238
00:15:59,419 --> 00:16:01,853
These potatoes sure are
scrumptious, aren't they?
239
00:16:01,922 --> 00:16:05,824
Ain't that a kick in the head.
Yes, they're scrumptious, aren't they?
240
00:16:05,892 --> 00:16:08,884
Potato, my ass.
Ain't that a kick in the head?
241
00:16:08,962 --> 00:16:11,988
What that piece of spaghetti remind you of?
Oh!
242
00:16:12,065 --> 00:16:16,263
Oh, Grandma, now, come on. That's enough now.
Sure enough.
243
00:16:16,336 --> 00:16:20,397
Maybe Mr. Johnson, perhaps?
244
00:16:20,473 --> 00:16:24,375
Oh, Lord have mercy.
Let me tell you, old woman.
245
00:16:24,444 --> 00:16:27,675
What I do in my bedroom is my business.
You understand?
246
00:16:27,747 --> 00:16:31,410
Only thing you do in your bedroom is pull
the lint off your scrotum.
247
00:16:31,484 --> 00:16:35,250
Now it's getting thick.
See? That's the last straw.
248
00:16:38,458 --> 00:16:41,450
I think I'm gonna propose a toast.
Let's make a toast.
249
00:16:41,528 --> 00:16:44,520
To Daddy.
Hear! Hear!
250
00:16:44,598 --> 00:16:48,466
After 35 years of hard work in the
construction business, Thirty-five years!
251
00:16:48,535 --> 00:16:50,730
Daddy's gonna finally get
a chance to relax.
252
00:16:50,804 --> 00:16:53,932
Finally gonna get to relax.
This is true. - Damn right.
253
00:16:54,007 --> 00:16:55,372
And I'd like to say
in front ofeverbody here tonight-
254
00:16:55,442 --> 00:16:58,434
When you gonna stop jiving and
tell everbody you got laid off?
255
00:16:58,511 --> 00:17:01,446
Oh, my God.
256
00:17:01,514 --> 00:17:04,415
He's choking.
257
00:17:04,484 --> 00:17:06,816
Hey, somebody put the "Hemlock" on him?
Put your arm up!
258
00:17:06,886 --> 00:17:11,380
The "Hemlockmove. " Give me a knife
and straw. I'm gonna give him a tracheotomy.
259
00:17:11,458 --> 00:17:13,983
I seen them do it on E.R.
260
00:17:25,972 --> 00:17:28,600
It's allright, folks.
Everything's under control.
261
00:17:30,377 --> 00:17:33,403
Clesius. No, Clesius. Where
you going? Sherman! Clesius!
262
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:36,916
Dad, where you
going? - Daddy! - Oh!
263
00:17:36,983 --> 00:17:41,283
Now you see what you did, Joe College?
You done messed up the whole party.
264
00:17:59,339 --> 00:18:02,706
Jason, I just know I'm not the one saying
all those awful things.
265
00:18:02,776 --> 00:18:07,304
It was him. You may be right, Professor.
Take a look at this reading.
266
00:18:10,383 --> 00:18:14,217
Right there. Recombining with the gene that governs
testosterone production.
267
00:18:16,389 --> 00:18:18,721
Buddy Love.
268
00:18:21,294 --> 00:18:23,489
I told you.
That's Buddy Love.
269
00:18:23,563 --> 00:18:25,394
Don't panic. Allright.
270
00:18:25,465 --> 00:18:28,559
We should be able to get rid of him.
According to Denise's theories,
271
00:18:28,635 --> 00:18:31,126
we should be able to isolate that gene and extract it.
No, no way.
272
00:18:31,204 --> 00:18:33,695
Professor, what you're talking about
is extremely dangerous.
273
00:18:33,773 --> 00:18:36,241
Those traces of Buddy must've been
in your system this whole time.
274
00:18:36,309 --> 00:18:39,335
You've been able to keep them under control.
Not anymore. He's back now.
275
00:18:39,412 --> 00:18:43,542
He's coming back 'cause he knows
I'm happy and he wanna ruin everthing.
276
00:18:43,616 --> 00:18:46,278
Yeah, but he is not a he.
He is a gene.
277
00:18:46,352 --> 00:18:50,049
He's just part of you.
Oh, no, he's not.
278
00:18:50,123 --> 00:18:52,250
Am I interrupting?
279
00:18:52,325 --> 00:18:58,093
Oh, uh, not at all. We were just
doing some last-minute tests on Buster.
280
00:18:58,164 --> 00:18:59,688
Yeah.
281
00:18:59,766 --> 00:19:03,361
Uh, Sherman, can I talk to you
in private for just a second?
282
00:19:07,407 --> 00:19:10,774
Sherman, I got a call today,
283
00:19:10,844 --> 00:19:14,302
and, well, I've been offered a full professorship
at the University of Maine.
284
00:19:14,380 --> 00:19:19,841
University of Maine? But,
Denise, that's in Maine. Yeah.
285
00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:23,514
Oh.
286
00:19:23,590 --> 00:19:27,617
Well, uh, that's a fine department
over there in Maine.
287
00:19:27,694 --> 00:19:30,891
It is gonna be a...
288
00:19:30,964 --> 00:19:33,262
tremendous loss to Wellman, though.
289
00:19:33,333 --> 00:19:37,269
Well, I haven't decided
to leave just yet. You haven't?
290
00:19:37,337 --> 00:19:40,033
Well, no, I mean-
291
00:19:40,106 --> 00:19:42,904
There's something
very important to me here,
292
00:19:42,976 --> 00:19:46,343
and I'm not so sure
I can just leave it behind.
293
00:19:46,412 --> 00:19:50,542
Well, Denise, you can finish
the research we started on your own.
294
00:19:50,617 --> 00:19:55,281
Sherman, I'm not talking
about research. Really?
295
00:19:55,355 --> 00:19:57,915
Sherman,
you're ver special to me.
296
00:20:03,329 --> 00:20:05,991
Oh, well, uh,
I didn't...
297
00:20:06,065 --> 00:20:08,659
thinkyou and I
would ever- ever-
298
00:20:08,735 --> 00:20:12,000
because of-
299
00:20:12,071 --> 00:20:14,562
How can I put it?
Because I'm- Big.
300
00:20:14,641 --> 00:20:19,101
Yeah. I was gonna say fat,
but, yeah.
301
00:20:19,179 --> 00:20:22,615
Big is better, yep.
302
00:20:22,682 --> 00:20:27,415
Sherman, that doesn't matter to me.
What matters to me is that...
303
00:20:27,487 --> 00:20:31,321
you're kind and decent.
304
00:20:33,526 --> 00:20:37,462
You are...
the most brilliant man I've ever known.
305
00:20:40,533 --> 00:20:44,367
Uh, speaking of which, I shouldn't keep you
from your research,
306
00:20:44,437 --> 00:20:46,166
so, um, I'll talk to you later.
307
00:20:46,239 --> 00:20:49,174
Okay, I'll see you soon.
308
00:20:54,247 --> 00:20:56,181
My goodness.
309
00:21:19,272 --> 00:21:21,740
Professor? You okay?
310
00:21:25,144 --> 00:21:29,046
Yeah. I just don't wanna
hurt her, Jason.
311
00:21:29,115 --> 00:21:31,743
Then you won't.
312
00:21:33,753 --> 00:21:36,745
Hey, you can control Buddy.
313
00:21:39,626 --> 00:21:44,120
You know, it's funny how you get used to certain
things in life, you know?
314
00:21:44,197 --> 00:21:48,861
You get used to being overweight.
I know I did.
315
00:21:48,935 --> 00:21:50,869
You even get used to people
making fun of you.
316
00:21:54,107 --> 00:21:57,702
Somewhere along the line,
I got used to being alone.
317
00:21:59,946 --> 00:22:03,347
And I just don't wanna
be alone anymore.
318
00:22:49,982 --> 00:22:52,382
Denise! Denise!
319
00:22:54,019 --> 00:22:56,112
Oh, Sherman,
the flowers are beautiful.
320
00:22:56,188 --> 00:22:59,021
But what are you doing down there?
Please, come inside.
321
00:22:59,091 --> 00:23:01,457
Just a minute. Let me do something first.
Come here, guys.
322
00:23:11,303 --> 00:23:13,771
Denise,
I just wanna say that...
323
00:23:13,839 --> 00:23:16,467
working along side you
this past year,
324
00:23:16,541 --> 00:23:19,271
getting to know you
and be close to you-
325
00:23:19,344 --> 00:23:22,108
it's been the most
wonderful time of my life.
326
00:23:22,180 --> 00:23:25,616
The most wonderful time
of his life
327
00:23:27,119 --> 00:23:29,781
How lovely.
328
00:23:29,855 --> 00:23:32,323
I'd just like to say that-
329
00:23:32,391 --> 00:23:35,724
it doesn't matter if you wanna
take that other job or if you wanna stay here.
330
00:23:35,794 --> 00:23:39,252
What matters to me most
is that you're happy.
331
00:23:39,331 --> 00:23:42,425
Denise, I have something
that I wanna ask you.
332
00:23:42,501 --> 00:23:45,299
He wants to ask you
333
00:23:48,106 --> 00:23:50,336
Denise-
Denise Gaines-
334
00:23:50,409 --> 00:23:53,572
Yes, Sherman?
Denise, will you-
335
00:23:53,645 --> 00:23:55,579
Well, ask her!
336
00:23:55,647 --> 00:24:00,016
Denise, will you
Hey, Sherman. You hear me, Sherman?
337
00:24:00,085 --> 00:24:02,519
Denise, will you-
will you...
338
00:24:02,587 --> 00:24:05,112
let me come up there
and put my beef in your taco?
339
00:24:05,190 --> 00:24:08,284
Put the beef in your taco
What?
340
00:24:08,360 --> 00:24:11,124
Oh, no, no, no, no!
341
00:24:11,196 --> 00:24:13,187
That's not what I meant to say,
Denise. That was a little joke.
342
00:24:13,265 --> 00:24:17,361
A little joke. I wanted to see if you
wanted to go out and get Mexican food.
343
00:24:17,436 --> 00:24:20,633
That's why I said that.
Well, I am kinda hungry, but I'm not-
344
00:24:20,706 --> 00:24:25,643
Yeah, you are, huh?
I bet you could standfor a big ol' Whopper right now.
345
00:24:25,711 --> 00:24:28,009
A big ol' Whopper right now
346
00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:31,880
You're sick!
I got to tell you, I'm a Jumbo Jack man myself.
347
00:24:31,950 --> 00:24:34,043
Yeah, and I'm loaded
with secret sauce.
348
00:24:34,119 --> 00:24:36,280
Yeah! Come on!
349
00:24:39,091 --> 00:24:42,117
Back that thang up!
Yeah!
350
00:24:42,194 --> 00:24:44,321
Come on! Come on!
Yeah!
351
00:24:44,396 --> 00:24:46,830
Yeah!
352
00:24:46,898 --> 00:24:49,366
Come on!
Make it funky!
353
00:24:54,639 --> 00:24:57,233
You're gonna ruin my lawn,
you pervert!
354
00:25:00,445 --> 00:25:03,642
Put on the good ass!
355
00:25:03,715 --> 00:25:07,879
Sherman, I don't know what's gotten into you,
but I don't like it at all!
356
00:25:07,953 --> 00:25:11,354
Hah, way to go, Sherman!
Oh, my goodness!
357
00:25:11,423 --> 00:25:15,189
You haven't seen the last of me, Sherman!
Oh, my goodness, what'd I do?
358
00:25:15,260 --> 00:25:18,024
Denise!
Denise!
359
00:25:18,096 --> 00:25:23,329
I'm gonna pee on myself.
I'm gonna pee in your pants!
360
00:26:10,182 --> 00:26:13,811
Okay, Buddy,
it's time foryou to go.
361
00:26:52,991 --> 00:26:55,789
That's sexy.
362
00:26:59,965 --> 00:27:04,299
You-ou-ou've got
the magic touch
363
00:27:04,369 --> 00:27:07,600
Ooh, hoo
Hey, what you playing that for?
364
00:27:07,672 --> 00:27:12,871
I thought it'd be soothing. It'd be soothing
if you turned that shit off so I can sleep.
365
00:27:12,944 --> 00:27:14,912
Oh, Clesius,
you haven't even looked at me.
366
00:27:14,980 --> 00:27:19,974
I know what you look like. We married for 44
years. I look at you ever day, all day long.
367
00:27:20,051 --> 00:27:22,679
I know just what you look like.
Clesius, please, look at me!
368
00:27:22,754 --> 00:27:25,518
Damn.
Now here we go.
369
00:27:29,561 --> 00:27:32,655
You got a show tonight?
What you got that on for?
370
00:27:32,731 --> 00:27:37,225
Well, if you don't know after 44 years of
marriage, I don't know what to say to you.
371
00:27:37,302 --> 00:27:41,033
You should say good night and take that damn
rag off that lamp before we burn something down.
372
00:27:41,106 --> 00:27:44,473
Hell.
373
00:27:44,542 --> 00:27:46,976
There!
374
00:27:49,981 --> 00:27:52,415
What about Viagra?
375
00:27:54,719 --> 00:27:56,846
Viagra don't work for me.
I've been taking 'em like M&M's.
376
00:27:59,357 --> 00:28:01,450
Look, Clesius,
maybe it's psychosomatic.
377
00:28:01,526 --> 00:28:05,257
I seen on Oprah once that this happen to men
after they get fired.
378
00:28:05,330 --> 00:28:07,491
Um, Imean, retired. You know, sometimes
you lose yourself-esteem.
379
00:28:07,565 --> 00:28:09,533
Lose self-esteem?
I ain't lost no self-esteem.
380
00:28:09,601 --> 00:28:12,434
You're always yapping about it.
You won't never let up! Forget it!
381
00:28:12,504 --> 00:28:15,530
You're like a broken record. Ever time I
turn around, "Clesius, how you feeling now?"
382
00:28:15,607 --> 00:28:18,041
"You got the groove now?"
Ever time I walk in the room,
383
00:28:18,109 --> 00:28:20,509
I don't even wanna hear it. you shake your ass,
tring to get me stimulated.
384
00:28:20,578 --> 00:28:22,341
Go to sleep, please.
Let it happen naturally.
385
00:28:22,414 --> 00:28:25,941
Never mind, Clesius!
Never mind!
386
00:28:26,017 --> 00:28:30,283
I mean, I'm sorry to yell and scream, but you got
too much pressure on me!
387
00:28:30,355 --> 00:28:32,585
You want tenderness?
Ease up on the pressure.
388
00:28:32,657 --> 00:28:35,182
Too much pressure for me.
389
00:28:35,260 --> 00:28:39,754
Slowit down, Isaac.
No, no, baby, I'm overhere.
390
00:28:39,831 --> 00:28:41,765
Now, there they go.
391
00:28:41,833 --> 00:28:45,735
Now, you're fine now.
Isaac, you're a champion.
392
00:28:45,804 --> 00:28:48,364
That's your old-ass mother. Hey!
My mama has a healthy libido.
393
00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:51,102
Gotta slowit down! lain't taking
nobody to the emergency room tonight!
394
00:28:51,176 --> 00:28:54,111
Somebody break their leg,
gonna stay broke this time.
395
00:28:54,179 --> 00:28:57,811
Isaac! Bingo. Pokeno.
396
00:28:58,912 --> 00:29:02,848
Professor? Professor?
Hey.
397
00:29:02,916 --> 00:29:06,181
Professor?
Hey, Professor!
398
00:29:06,253 --> 00:29:09,245
Wake up.
Oh. Oh, Jason.
399
00:29:09,322 --> 00:29:12,587
My God, what happened?
400
00:29:15,428 --> 00:29:17,362
Buddy.
I had to get rid of Buddy.
401
00:29:17,430 --> 00:29:20,263
What?
He had to go.
402
00:29:20,333 --> 00:29:23,166
You could've killed yourself.
I mean, who knows?
403
00:29:23,236 --> 00:29:25,966
This could affect your coordination,
your neurological system.
404
00:29:26,039 --> 00:29:28,530
It could even affect your intelligence. We don't
even know if this is gonna work.
405
00:29:30,210 --> 00:29:32,144
Only one way to fii nd out.
406
00:30:03,577 --> 00:30:05,977
Okay, Sherman, what
is this about? Denise.
407
00:30:06,046 --> 00:30:08,276
I'm so glad you came.
You know, I almost didn't come.
408
00:30:08,348 --> 00:30:10,282
Well, I'm awful glad you did.
409
00:30:10,350 --> 00:30:13,285
Listen to me, Denise.
Listen.
410
00:30:13,353 --> 00:30:15,446
You know, fireflies,
when they're searchingfor a mate,
411
00:30:15,522 --> 00:30:19,014
the way they findone another
is they emit apheromone,
412
00:30:19,092 --> 00:30:21,253
and I've synthesized it
into a spray form.
413
00:30:21,328 --> 00:30:25,992
Wait a minute.
You brought me out here for an experiment?
414
00:30:26,066 --> 00:30:27,863
Denise, wait, please! Just hear
me out! Please, don't leave.
415
00:30:27,934 --> 00:30:30,198
Sherman, why did you act
that way the other night?
416
00:30:31,605 --> 00:30:34,267
Well, Denise,
417
00:30:36,209 --> 00:30:39,372
when I found out that you might
be leaving, it just got me all messed up inside.
418
00:30:39,446 --> 00:30:41,380
I said some things
I really didn't mean at all.
419
00:30:41,448 --> 00:30:44,849
It was- It was like
there was another person inside me...
420
00:30:44,918 --> 00:30:48,183
who didn't appreciate how wonderful you
are to me and how special you are to me.
421
00:30:48,255 --> 00:30:51,816
And-And-
But thatside of me is gone now.
422
00:30:51,892 --> 00:30:55,225
I got rid of that person forever.
You'I I never see that ugly face again.
423
00:30:55,295 --> 00:30:58,628
I just want you to know that for sure.
That's why I wanted you to come out here tonight.
424
00:30:58,698 --> 00:31:01,166
Just- Just bear with me,
please.
425
00:31:18,585 --> 00:31:21,349
Hope my little friends
might be able to...
426
00:31:21,421 --> 00:31:23,981
say it better than me.
427
00:31:31,898 --> 00:31:34,992
Yes, Sherman Klump,
I will.
428
00:31:35,068 --> 00:31:38,060
Will you really? Really? Really.
429
00:31:38,138 --> 00:31:40,106
Yes. I will. I really will. You will?
430
00:31:40,173 --> 00:31:44,234
Yeah!
Yeah!
431
00:31:47,914 --> 00:31:50,280
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
432
00:31:54,321 --> 00:31:56,619
Come on, Buster.
Time to go home.
433
00:31:56,690 --> 00:31:59,318
That's right. That's right.
Time to go home.
434
00:31:59,392 --> 00:32:02,225
Now wait. Sit.
Good boy.
435
00:32:02,295 --> 00:32:05,230
Wait for Uncle "J."
Stud.
436
00:32:55,081 --> 00:32:57,481
Buster!
437
00:32:59,853 --> 00:33:03,084
Hey, Buster, where'd you
go, boy? Here's a good boy.
438
00:33:11,331 --> 00:33:15,028
Ohhhh, Sherman,
Sherman, Sherman!
439
00:33:15,101 --> 00:33:18,434
My baby's finally getting
married, married, married!
440
00:33:18,505 --> 00:33:21,133
Oh, Sherman! I'm so
happy for you, Sherman.
441
00:33:21,207 --> 00:33:23,698
You're finally
gonna get some.
442
00:33:29,282 --> 00:33:34,219
Tell me something good
443
00:33:34,287 --> 00:33:36,653
Whoo!
444
00:33:36,723 --> 00:33:40,489
Tell me that you
love me, yeah
445
00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:43,893
Tell me something
446
00:33:43,963 --> 00:33:47,023
Good
Oh, baby, baby
447
00:33:47,100 --> 00:33:50,228
Come on now, dance with me,
girl. You look fantastic.
448
00:33:52,405 --> 00:33:54,168
If you two can stop
getting all jiggy with it,
449
00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:56,970
perhaps I can give you something
to really celebrate. Oh, yes, sir.
450
00:33:57,043 --> 00:33:58,977
Yes, Dean, what's that?
Oh, nothing much.
451
00:33:59,045 --> 00:34:02,674
A letter from Phleer Pharmaceuticals, largest
drug company in the world.
452
00:34:02,749 --> 00:34:05,718
I told them about your little discover, and they
made a preemptive offer.
453
00:34:05,785 --> 00:34:09,551
Not too shabby, eh?
454
00:34:09,622 --> 00:34:11,556
A hundred and fiifty
million dollars!
455
00:34:11,624 --> 00:34:14,184
Oh, my God, Sherman!
456
00:34:14,260 --> 00:34:16,888
A hundred and fiifty million dollars!
Oh, my goodness.
457
00:34:16,963 --> 00:34:19,261
Isn't that wonderful?
Now, remember, that money belongs to Wellman.
458
00:34:19,332 --> 00:34:23,268
All you have to do is prove to Phleer the formula
works at the press conference I set up.
459
00:34:23,336 --> 00:34:28,933
Yeah! Of-Of course.
$150 million- my mind's all scribble-scrabble.
460
00:34:32,579 --> 00:34:35,446
Oh, Mama, Ican't wait to see what she
looks like in my old wedding dress.
461
00:34:35,515 --> 00:34:38,348
I can't wait to see, Mama.
She gonna-
462
00:34:38,418 --> 00:34:41,285
Oh!
463
00:34:43,690 --> 00:34:47,524
Oh, seeing you in that dress
take me right back to the time I got married.
464
00:34:47,594 --> 00:34:50,563
It's beautiful.
Oh, you look wonderful. Show Mama what you look like.
465
00:34:50,630 --> 00:34:53,758
Mama, look at this.
Oh, you look so lovely.
466
00:34:53,833 --> 00:34:57,929
Oh, be careful now.
She looks fabulous in it, don't she, Mama? Look at her.
467
00:34:58,004 --> 00:35:02,464
Denise, you still remember what I told you
about marital relations?
468
00:35:02,542 --> 00:35:06,478
Oh, Mama. Denise, look. Try this
pie. I made it with Snickers.
469
00:35:06,546 --> 00:35:10,346
Now, don't be shy.
Come on over here.
470
00:35:10,416 --> 00:35:13,442
Oh, that's pretty.
Okay, if you get bored with your man,
471
00:35:13,520 --> 00:35:16,887
it's perfectly okay topicture
someone else's headon his body.
472
00:35:16,956 --> 00:35:18,890
Right. Ooh, you got
a little waist, girl.
473
00:35:18,958 --> 00:35:22,724
That's right. That gentleman,
Stone Phillips, on NBC.
474
00:35:22,795 --> 00:35:26,424
You know, Granny, I really don't think
I need to do that.
475
00:35:26,499 --> 00:35:30,993
Isaac, you don't need to hear this.
It's private. It's private!
476
00:35:31,070 --> 00:35:33,095
We gonna talk
girl talk now, baby.
477
00:35:33,173 --> 00:35:36,939
From time to time, I have fantasies about
Stone Phillipsfrom NBC.
478
00:35:37,010 --> 00:35:41,447
Mama. Mama, quiet.
It's true. It's the same dream all the time.
479
00:35:41,514 --> 00:35:44,244
I'm in a tobacco barn.
Stone Phillips is my coworker,
480
00:35:44,317 --> 00:35:48,617
andhe don't never have on no shirt in the
dream, and I don't never have on no pants.
481
00:35:48,688 --> 00:35:51,851
It's the nougat that makes it
chewy. And I stand on this ladder,
482
00:35:51,925 --> 00:35:55,952
Stone Phillipsget a little peek of heaven
I got up myskirt.
483
00:35:56,029 --> 00:35:59,055
I invite him up the ladder,
he come up the ladder and throw me on the tobacco.
484
00:35:59,132 --> 00:36:02,932
And we start going at it
like two mice.
485
00:36:03,002 --> 00:36:06,267
Stone, Stone, Stone.
Mm!
486
00:36:06,339 --> 00:36:09,035
Oh, I think that's
a wonderful fiit.
487
00:36:09,108 --> 00:36:11,668
I do too.
488
00:36:13,780 --> 00:36:18,808
Oh, you're so sweet. Sherman
and Denise! Sherman and Denise!
489
00:36:18,885 --> 00:36:23,481
Marriage, marriage, marriage, marriage,
marriage. They gonna get married, Mama.
490
00:36:23,556 --> 00:36:25,490
Ooh, I'm so happy.
491
00:36:25,558 --> 00:36:27,492
Welcome back. Marriage,
marriage, marriage, marriage.
492
00:36:29,929 --> 00:36:32,159
Nutty, nutty, nutty
my love for you
493
00:36:32,232 --> 00:36:34,530
Ican't believe
my dreams come true
494
00:36:34,601 --> 00:36:36,967
I've finally foundsomebody
whose heart is true
495
00:36:37,036 --> 00:36:39,732
And best of all is you're
nutty, nutty, nutty forme
496
00:36:39,806 --> 00:36:43,902
Whoa, whoa
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
497
00:36:43,977 --> 00:36:46,283
Well, well, well, we've seen quite a bit
ofeach othertoday.
498
00:36:46,417 --> 00:36:49,113
Now strip down to your shorts. Right.
499
00:36:50,921 --> 00:36:54,152
I suppose you thought I was gonna object to
a strip search, didn't you, Chief?
500
00:36:54,224 --> 00:36:56,749
Keep your clothes on, please.
Don't nobody wanna see that!
501
00:37:00,030 --> 00:37:03,329
Here's my wallet. Why don't you
check foryourself?
502
00:37:03,400 --> 00:37:07,063
Yeah, hold that stomach in,
Robert!
503
00:37:07,137 --> 00:37:09,264
What's his problem?
504
00:37:09,339 --> 00:37:11,671
I don't know, but enough
is enough. Excuse me, sir.
505
00:37:11,742 --> 00:37:16,941
Young man, will you please keep it down just
a little bit 'cause we're trying to watch-
506
00:37:17,014 --> 00:37:19,346
Just when you thought it was
safe to go back to the theaters.
507
00:37:23,654 --> 00:37:27,181
Hello, fat ass!
508
00:37:27,257 --> 00:37:29,851
Maybe we should get going.
I don't feel too good all of a sudden. Let's go.
509
00:37:29,927 --> 00:37:32,157
Come on, let's go somewhere else.
Sherman, who was that?
510
00:37:32,229 --> 00:37:36,165
I don't know. I didn't really get a good look at him.
Sherman! Sherman Klump!
511
00:37:36,233 --> 00:37:39,202
You still been hitting them Happy
Meals. You haven't changed an inch.
512
00:37:39,269 --> 00:37:43,603
You remember me
Buddy Love. We used to both chase that girl, Carla, at the same time.
513
00:37:43,674 --> 00:37:47,110
You ever hit that?
Miss Purty and I were just friends.
514
00:37:47,177 --> 00:37:50,010
"Just friends"-
I guess that means you didn't hit it, huh?
515
00:37:50,080 --> 00:37:53,072
Who's your new friend? She sure is
fii ne. Yes, fii ne. What's your name?
516
00:37:53,150 --> 00:37:56,085
Sherman, suddenly I don't feel
so well. Can we leave, please?
517
00:37:56,153 --> 00:37:58,383
Yes, let's go, please. Can I talk to Sherman
for one second? Then you can have him.
518
00:37:58,455 --> 00:38:01,185
One second, please. I gotta talk to you.
We gonna have a little boy talk.
519
00:38:01,258 --> 00:38:04,557
Excuse us. Sherman, how you doing, baby?
What do you want here?
520
00:38:04,628 --> 00:38:06,721
A little respect.
You left me all by myself in that test tube...
521
00:38:06,797 --> 00:38:09,391
without a card or a letter,
and now I want a divorce.
522
00:38:09,466 --> 00:38:12,299
And this is a community property state,
so I want my share.
523
00:38:12,369 --> 00:38:17,966
Want your share of what?
The youth formula we invented!
524
00:38:18,041 --> 00:38:21,067
You mean, the youth formula that I invented.
Oh, no way, Buddy, no way.
525
00:38:21,144 --> 00:38:23,476
Who you grounding, fat boy? You
grounding me? - I haven't grounded-
526
00:38:23,547 --> 00:38:26,948
I was hoping we could do this like gentlemen.
Come on, Sherman.
527
00:38:27,017 --> 00:38:29,577
You're gonna make me do something
nasty to you, Sherman. I'll do something nasty.
528
00:38:29,653 --> 00:38:33,419
Sherman!
See you soon, Sherman!
529
00:38:33,490 --> 00:38:38,093
Sherman!
530
00:38:40,564 --> 00:38:43,226
What the hell
are you looking at?
531
00:38:43,300 --> 00:38:46,736
Oh, thank you, Sherman.
532
00:38:46,803 --> 00:38:50,068
What else did I get from Sherman?
What does this say?
533
00:38:50,140 --> 00:38:54,702
"Phleer Pharmaceuticals. "
$150 mill- $150 million.
534
00:38:54,778 --> 00:38:59,340
I think Buddy's going shopping.
535
00:39:11,328 --> 00:39:14,491
Professor, I got here as fast as I could.
536
00:39:14,565 --> 00:39:17,466
I've got to hide this formula
before Buddy gets to it. Good idea.
537
00:39:17,534 --> 00:39:20,526
I found something
I think you should look at.
538
00:39:20,604 --> 00:39:25,041
When I left here last night, everthing was fii ne.
I mean, this was not here.
539
00:39:25,108 --> 00:39:29,442
Good Lord. Buddy must've recombined from the genomic
sequence I extracted.
540
00:39:29,513 --> 00:39:32,676
This doesn't make any sense. He's
just a fragment of genetic information.
541
00:39:32,749 --> 00:39:35,445
He's nothing without a strand of DNA
to graft himself onto.
542
00:39:35,519 --> 00:39:38,113
Where-Where did he get it?
543
00:39:38,188 --> 00:39:40,122
Mm.
544
00:39:40,190 --> 00:39:42,852
Just a second here.
545
00:39:45,028 --> 00:39:47,019
Buster!
546
00:39:55,806 --> 00:39:58,673
Thank you so much.
Leanne Guilford.
547
00:39:58,742 --> 00:40:01,836
President of Acquisitions.
Buddy Love, president of Love Industries.
548
00:40:01,912 --> 00:40:03,880
Allergies?
549
00:40:03,947 --> 00:40:06,882
No. Do you have a dog?
Yes, I do- a Yorkie.
550
00:40:06,950 --> 00:40:09,612
Oh. She's driving me crazy right now.
551
00:40:09,686 --> 00:40:12,883
Bitch.
Excuse me.
552
00:40:12,956 --> 00:40:16,756
It's a female dog that you have,
and she's in heat, right? Yes. How did you know that?
553
00:40:16,827 --> 00:40:18,886
Let's just say I have
a sixth sense about those things. Is this her?
554
00:40:18,962 --> 00:40:22,921
Yeah, little Courtney.
Ooh, nasty.
555
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:26,163
Mr. Love, maybe we'd better do this
another time. No, this is the perfect time.
556
00:40:26,236 --> 00:40:31,003
Let's do this right now. This is the perfect time
to talk about my youth formula.
557
00:40:31,074 --> 00:40:33,907
We are already committed to purchasing
Professor Klump's formula.
558
00:40:33,977 --> 00:40:36,070
Oh, Professor Klump's formula?
That's if it works.
559
00:40:36,146 --> 00:40:41,174
Let's just that although he's a brilliant scientist,
at times, he can be unstable.
560
00:40:41,251 --> 00:40:43,185
Yes.
Huh.
561
00:40:43,253 --> 00:40:45,278
Interesting. Yes, now, my formula works...
562
00:40:45,355 --> 00:40:50,588
and can be yours for the price
of $149 million, if you act now, pretty lady.
563
00:40:50,661 --> 00:40:54,791
Forgive me for being blunt, but you don't
expect me tojust take your word for it, do you?
564
00:40:54,865 --> 00:40:57,595
Oh, no, not at all. Just say when,
and I'll make it available to you.
565
00:40:57,668 --> 00:41:00,193
All right.
566
00:41:00,270 --> 00:41:03,103
If Klump can't deliver and you
can prove your formula's better, Yes?
567
00:41:03,173 --> 00:41:06,233
Phleer would have to seriously consider it.
Is that right?
568
00:41:06,309 --> 00:41:09,244
I've got to go to a meeting.
Can we reschedule for later? We certainly can.
569
00:41:09,312 --> 00:41:13,646
Good. How about Wednesday, 7:00?
Perfect. Wednesday at 7:00.
570
00:41:13,717 --> 00:41:17,585
Bring the formula.
Yes.
571
00:41:17,654 --> 00:41:21,613
Excuse me. Where's your restroom?
Down the hall, to the left.
572
00:41:21,692 --> 00:41:24,126
Thank you. You finished with this? Sure.
573
00:41:44,948 --> 00:41:47,610
Whoo, whoo!
574
00:41:47,684 --> 00:41:51,120
What the hell you looking at?
Huh? Oh!
575
00:42:00,697 --> 00:42:04,189
Good God! What "good
God"? I went on the paper!
576
00:42:11,241 --> 00:42:14,176
Genetic anomalies can occur...
577
00:42:14,244 --> 00:42:18,010
in any living organism
through- through-
578
00:42:18,081 --> 00:42:21,608
Come on now, people.
Spontaneous mutation.
579
00:42:21,685 --> 00:42:26,213
Now what is it that ourgenetic codes
can determine about us?
580
00:42:26,289 --> 00:42:29,258
Miss Tate?
Uh, they can determine...
581
00:42:29,326 --> 00:42:32,887
whether you have blue eyes
or pouty lips or a cute butt.
582
00:42:32,963 --> 00:42:35,056
Stuff like that.
583
00:42:35,132 --> 00:42:37,225
Right, right, precisely.
Very good.
584
00:42:37,300 --> 00:42:41,566
But what about random nucleotide
polymorphisms, Professor? Excellent question.
585
00:42:41,638 --> 00:42:48,175
Random nucleotide
polymorphisms-
586
00:42:50,781 --> 00:42:54,148
Random nucleotide-
587
00:43:00,056 --> 00:43:02,024
I ain't got a clue.
588
00:43:08,765 --> 00:43:11,893
Who knows? This could affect your coordination,
your neurologicalsystem.
589
00:43:11,968 --> 00:43:16,166
I mean, it could even affect your intelligence.
What was I talking about?
590
00:43:16,239 --> 00:43:20,266
Genetic anomalies.
Yes, genetic anomalies. As I was saying-
591
00:43:32,622 --> 00:43:36,854
Think you're
pretty smart, huh, Molly?
592
00:43:39,129 --> 00:43:41,529
Not gonna beat me again.
593
00:43:57,431 --> 00:43:59,695
Oh.
594
00:43:59,766 --> 00:44:03,668
That makes five times
in a row now. Hey.
595
00:44:03,737 --> 00:44:07,605
Can I talk to you for a second?
Jason, yes, please, come in.
596
00:44:10,911 --> 00:44:14,244
Look, I know you think you're feeling fine,
but I ran some more tests anyway.
597
00:44:14,314 --> 00:44:17,078
Really?
Yeah. When you extracted Buddy,
598
00:44:17,150 --> 00:44:22,588
somehow it altered the gene that regulates neurotransmitter
activity to the cerebral cortex.
599
00:44:22,656 --> 00:44:26,888
Uh,Jason, all these big words are really perplexing to me.
Can you talk in plain English?
600
00:44:29,429 --> 00:44:31,897
You're losing your intelligence, sir.
601
00:44:34,968 --> 00:44:38,131
Yeah. Yeah, I know.
602
00:44:40,507 --> 00:44:43,169
I know.
I can feel it.
603
00:44:43,243 --> 00:44:46,644
I can't even beat Molly,
and she's the dumbest hamster we got.
604
00:44:46,713 --> 00:44:49,682
Jason, my presentation's
in two days.
605
00:44:49,749 --> 00:44:52,183
Now what am I gonna do?
606
00:45:03,797 --> 00:45:08,097
Oh, mygoodness.
Buddy.
607
00:45:18,445 --> 00:45:21,608
Oh, thank God.
608
00:45:34,828 --> 00:45:37,422
Hey, how's it going there, Sherman?
Yeah, Daddy, you startled me.
609
00:45:37,497 --> 00:45:40,466
What's that you got there, son?
The youth juice.
610
00:45:40,534 --> 00:45:44,095
Um, um, my formula. I was wondering if I could
keep it here for safe keeping.
611
00:45:44,170 --> 00:45:47,196
Oh, yeah, leave it in the refrigerator.
Ain't nobody gonna bother it.
612
00:45:47,274 --> 00:45:50,300
You allright? You looka little
strained. What's going on?
613
00:45:50,377 --> 00:45:54,211
Well, Daddy, you know,
I kinda got a lot on my mind.
614
00:45:54,281 --> 00:45:57,273
Really, I do. I guess I've been a little
worried about my presentation and all.
615
00:45:57,350 --> 00:45:59,944
Worried about your presentation?
You ain't got nothing to be worried about.
616
00:46:00,020 --> 00:46:03,683
We gonna be watching you on TV, supporting you,
and you should be proud. We proud.
617
00:46:03,757 --> 00:46:05,725
I know I'm proud. I tell you that. You ain't got
nothing to worried-
618
00:46:05,792 --> 00:46:09,159
You're gonna be doing just great.
Ah!
619
00:46:09,229 --> 00:46:12,528
I didn't hit you that hard. Don't act
like a little bitch. By the way, Sherman,
620
00:46:12,599 --> 00:46:16,035
how many people can say
that they raised a genius?
621
00:46:16,102 --> 00:46:18,969
I can.
622
00:46:23,109 --> 00:46:27,068
Worried about his presentation?
That's a good one there.
623
00:46:33,720 --> 00:46:36,553
Ooh, is this supposed to be that hard?
Yeah, let it set a while.
624
00:46:36,623 --> 00:46:38,591
Don't worry if it burns a little bit.
That's natural.
625
00:46:38,658 --> 00:46:41,855
All right, you the expert, Chantal.
Workyour magic, girl,
626
00:46:41,928 --> 00:46:43,862
'cause Denise's motheris coming
to this bachelorette party,
627
00:46:43,930 --> 00:46:46,421
and if she's as stunning as Denise,
I got to besparkling.
628
00:46:46,499 --> 00:46:48,797
Honey, you gonna blind
their asses.
629
00:46:48,868 --> 00:46:52,099
When you walk in that door,
they gonna think you're Tyra Banks.
630
00:46:52,172 --> 00:46:54,697
Oh, did I tell you the news?
631
00:46:54,774 --> 00:46:56,833
Leon got
one of them penis pumps.
632
00:46:56,910 --> 00:47:00,437
Penis pumps?
What'd he do with it? Mm-hmm.
633
00:47:00,513 --> 00:47:03,573
Supposed to pump it up or something.
Does it work?
634
00:47:03,650 --> 00:47:07,279
Just on the tip. Now that thing
look like a portabello mushroom.
635
00:47:07,354 --> 00:47:10,846
Isaac all natural.
636
00:47:10,924 --> 00:47:13,620
Soon as I walk in the room,
ten-hut.
637
00:47:13,693 --> 00:47:18,756
You know, I'm thinking about
having a little work done myself.
638
00:47:18,832 --> 00:47:21,096
The other day,
I got out the shower,
639
00:47:21,167 --> 00:47:23,397
and I bent down
to reach for a towel,
640
00:47:23,470 --> 00:47:25,802
and I felt a sharp pain
in my chest.
641
00:47:25,872 --> 00:47:30,536
Shot through my chest
and up around my back, down my spine.
642
00:47:30,610 --> 00:47:33,738
I thought, "Oh, Lord. " I thought
I was dying. I bent over and looked,
643
00:47:33,813 --> 00:47:36,907
and I was standing
on my own titty.
644
00:47:38,785 --> 00:47:41,413
You ain't have to get no breast
reduction. Just be more careful.
645
00:47:41,488 --> 00:47:44,321
Both feet too.
Both feet on it.
646
00:47:48,895 --> 00:47:52,956
All right, what the hell you old
hens cackling about? You ready to go?
647
00:47:53,033 --> 00:47:54,796
No, not quite.
I'll be ready in a minute.
648
00:47:54,868 --> 00:47:58,395
She still got to set up a few more minutes.
Have some more wine, girl.
649
00:47:58,471 --> 00:48:00,462
Ooh, girl, I don't know if I
should. I already had two glasses.
650
00:48:00,540 --> 00:48:03,100
Oh, go on, live a little.
Make your hair look better.
651
00:48:05,845 --> 00:48:08,405
Have mercy.
Yeah,just like Ifigured.
652
00:48:08,481 --> 00:48:12,008
You sit up here all day, getting
sloshed and talking about us men.
653
00:48:12,085 --> 00:48:15,987
Clesius, have you ever heard the expression, "mercy hump"?
Say what?
654
00:48:16,056 --> 00:48:19,116
'Cause that's what you been getting all these years
mercy humps.
655
00:48:19,192 --> 00:48:22,184
Stop it.
You out your goddamn mind. Let me tell you something.
656
00:48:22,262 --> 00:48:24,492
He ain't got nothing
but a limp doodle.
657
00:48:25,598 --> 00:48:28,590
Oops.
Sorry.
658
00:48:28,668 --> 00:48:30,659
Gotta get ya.
659
00:48:30,737 --> 00:48:34,002
Clesius!
Oh, look what you've done! Oh.
660
00:48:34,074 --> 00:48:37,271
Ah-
You girls are crazy. I'm leaving.
661
00:48:37,343 --> 00:48:40,870
Oh, Clesius, Clesius, wait! Clesius!
Oh, Clesius! I don't believe it.
662
00:48:40,947 --> 00:48:43,814
Clesius, I only told her 'cause
she got so much experience in sexual matters.
663
00:48:43,883 --> 00:48:47,216
I ain't nothing but a big damn joke
to you, ain't I? Tell the whole world!
664
00:48:47,287 --> 00:48:50,620
Her husband ain't nothing but a
big ol' pile of worth less crap!
665
00:48:50,690 --> 00:48:53,124
Clesius!
Clesius!
666
00:48:54,427 --> 00:48:56,361
Oh.
667
00:48:58,898 --> 00:49:01,731
I'm just glad they're back in town
so you can fii nally meet them.
668
00:49:01,801 --> 00:49:04,895
I'm extremely nervous because I
really want to make a good impression.
669
00:49:04,971 --> 00:49:06,939
Sherman, there's no reason
foryou to be nervous.
670
00:49:07,006 --> 00:49:10,840
My parents are very down-to-earth people,
and they're gonna love you.
671
00:49:10,910 --> 00:49:14,903
I guess it's not like they're rocket scientists.
Well, actually, they are.
672
00:49:14,981 --> 00:49:18,144
Daddy!
Sweetheart!
673
00:49:18,218 --> 00:49:21,847
Great to see you. You must be Sherman,
the genius who's marring my daughter.
674
00:49:21,921 --> 00:49:24,822
I guess that's me.
675
00:49:29,629 --> 00:49:34,760
They think I'm old. They think I'm
worn-out, huh? I'm gonna show all of'em.
676
00:49:36,970 --> 00:49:40,406
Screw the golden years.
And here's to youth!
677
00:49:49,482 --> 00:49:51,416
That's some nasty mess.
678
00:49:55,054 --> 00:49:57,420
I don't feel no-
679
00:50:16,609 --> 00:50:19,806
Damn, that was
some nasty stuff!
680
00:50:19,879 --> 00:50:23,576
Oh, I feel as strange as hell.
Oh! Hey, get your ass-
681
00:50:23,650 --> 00:50:26,084
Who the hell are you?
Who you put-
682
00:50:33,560 --> 00:50:35,494
It worked.
It worked!
683
00:50:37,564 --> 00:50:40,260
Papa's got a brand-new bag
684
00:50:52,478 --> 00:50:56,073
Yeah!
685
00:50:58,651 --> 00:51:00,585
Oh, what a beautiful bird.
686
00:51:00,653 --> 00:51:03,281
Oh, Crackers has been in our
family more than 50 years.
687
00:51:03,356 --> 00:51:07,122
Hmm? Fifty years.
He's older than I am.
688
00:51:07,193 --> 00:51:11,289
Sherman, your fly. Your fly.
Yeah, he can fly all over.
689
00:51:11,364 --> 00:51:13,958
No, no, no, zip your pants.
690
00:51:14,033 --> 00:51:19,519
Oh, my goodness. Excuse me. I felt
- I felt a little breeze.
691
00:51:19,653 --> 00:51:22,053
So, uh, genomic extractions.
692
00:51:22,122 --> 00:51:24,249
Fascinating.
693
00:51:24,324 --> 00:51:28,590
But the whole concept ofremoving faultygenes
must haveyou in an ethicalquandary.
694
00:51:28,662 --> 00:51:30,892
E- Excuse me. Ethical?
695
00:51:30,964 --> 00:51:34,923
Oh, yes, I don't know much
about "Ethicals", to be perfectly honest with you.
696
00:51:35,001 --> 00:51:37,162
But the "Quandar"-
I don't like the Japanese cars.
697
00:51:37,237 --> 00:51:38,602
I don't like
the Ethical Quandary.
698
00:51:38,672 --> 00:51:42,631
I'm a Volvo man myself.
Well, yeah.
699
00:51:44,044 --> 00:51:46,274
Oh!
700
00:51:50,450 --> 00:51:55,080
Sherman is known as the leading expert
in genomic extractions.
701
00:51:55,155 --> 00:51:58,283
Give us a little preview of the speech you're going to make
at the press conference.
702
00:52:02,662 --> 00:52:06,530
Say what now?
I know we would never be able to keep up,
703
00:52:06,599 --> 00:52:09,534
but is there some way that you could explain it
in layman terms?
704
00:52:09,602 --> 00:52:12,469
Oh, you'd like me
to explain to you?
705
00:52:12,539 --> 00:52:15,474
Yes. Well, I would love
to. I would be honored.
706
00:52:15,542 --> 00:52:18,409
It's really quite simple.
This corn, for instance-
707
00:52:18,478 --> 00:52:21,970
This piece ofcorn here
can represent a strand of DNA.
708
00:52:22,048 --> 00:52:24,016
And these little-
709
00:52:24,084 --> 00:52:27,178
the individual-
the bumpy things that go-
710
00:52:27,253 --> 00:52:29,517
The Green Giant calls them
"niblets. " Uh, niblets.
711
00:52:29,589 --> 00:52:32,649
These niblets represent each gene,
and they determine everything about you.
712
00:52:32,726 --> 00:52:36,719
For instance, Mrs. Gaines,
let's say if a person was to have big titties, like you.
713
00:52:36,796 --> 00:52:39,026
Sherman!
I'm sorry. Big titties.
714
00:52:39,099 --> 00:52:41,693
No, breasts. Scratch it.
Get off you. On me.
715
00:52:41,768 --> 00:52:44,430
Now, I have a big ass. Never mind that.
716
00:52:48,975 --> 00:52:53,708
What we're attempting to do here is
to extract the, uh, the bad, badgenes.
717
00:52:53,780 --> 00:52:56,271
Extract that titty out.
Andass comes out.
718
00:52:56,349 --> 00:52:58,283
And just leave
the good genes,
719
00:52:58,351 --> 00:53:00,546
which is very simple
if you think about it.
720
00:53:02,522 --> 00:53:04,285
Just ignore that.
721
00:53:04,357 --> 00:53:07,053
Please ignore those.
Those are the badgenes.
722
00:53:07,127 --> 00:53:11,063
What I'm really tring to do is go
deep, deep down into the gene structure,
723
00:53:11,131 --> 00:53:13,224
which oftentimes
is much more difficult.
724
00:53:16,336 --> 00:53:19,100
Crackers!
725
00:53:19,172 --> 00:53:21,106
Oh, goodness!
726
00:53:23,443 --> 00:53:26,435
I'm- I'm so-
so sorry about that.
727
00:53:26,513 --> 00:53:30,244
My pants got caught in the thing
and they pulled it on out.
728
00:53:30,316 --> 00:53:32,477
His wings istwitching a little bit,
so he's allright.
729
00:53:35,355 --> 00:53:37,846
Buddy Love.
730
00:53:37,924 --> 00:53:40,552
Mr. Love. Leanne Guilford.
Yes, Miss Guilford. How are you?
731
00:53:40,627 --> 00:53:43,391
You forgotten we have an appointment
right now? I had a hard time getting a cab.
732
00:53:43,463 --> 00:53:47,331
I'm on my way.
I'll wait for a few more minutes and then I'm leaving.
733
00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:50,233
Very good. I'll see you soon. All right.
734
00:53:50,303 --> 00:53:52,999
Yes!
735
00:53:53,072 --> 00:53:55,006
Whoo!
This isgreat!
736
00:53:55,074 --> 00:53:58,339
Sir, uh, please don't do
that. It's kind ofdangerous.
737
00:53:58,411 --> 00:54:02,370
You work here! Work here!
738
00:54:04,651 --> 00:54:06,448
Dynamite!
739
00:54:06,519 --> 00:54:08,453
Yeah! Whoo!
740
00:54:08,521 --> 00:54:11,718
Hey, let me have a seven and seven.
Coming up.
741
00:54:13,893 --> 00:54:17,192
You about the fii nest-looking
thing I seen in a long time.
742
00:54:17,263 --> 00:54:19,959
Well, thank you very much.
You pretty damn foxy yourself, baby.
743
00:54:20,033 --> 00:54:23,127
A lot of young men
are intimidated by an older woman.
744
00:54:23,203 --> 00:54:25,194
Is that right?
Well, let me tell you something.
745
00:54:25,271 --> 00:54:28,536
You look pretty damn young to me. In
fact, let me tell you something, baby.
746
00:54:28,608 --> 00:54:31,042
You just about the-
You-
747
00:54:32,445 --> 00:54:36,609
Yeah, you look good. Pretty
fine. Foxy fine and young.
748
00:54:36,683 --> 00:54:39,914
Excuse me one second.
Yes, yes, yes.
749
00:54:39,986 --> 00:54:43,979
Get away from my woman.
Mind your own business, Willie.
750
00:54:44,057 --> 00:54:46,787
What?
It's over between us. He just won't accept it.
751
00:54:46,860 --> 00:54:50,296
Willie, she said it's over between y'all. Besides,
you getting the wrong idea.
752
00:54:50,363 --> 00:54:53,958
Outside. Outside. I'm tired of this
shit. Say what? Who you pushing?
753
00:54:54,033 --> 00:54:56,593
Not again, Willie.
Willie, what's wrong with you?
754
00:54:56,669 --> 00:54:59,331
All right, enough is enough!
This is going too damn far!
755
00:54:59,405 --> 00:55:03,136
You gonna make me have to put my foot in your ass.
I'm gonna tell you straight up.
756
00:55:03,209 --> 00:55:07,168
I don't wanna have to hurt you,
Pops! Pops? I'll "pop" your ass.
757
00:55:07,247 --> 00:55:09,511
Would you please put
your clothes back on?
758
00:55:09,582 --> 00:55:12,244
You'll hurt yourself.
You look like a roast chicken.
759
00:55:13,486 --> 00:55:15,818
That was a lucky shot.
760
00:55:18,057 --> 00:55:22,687
Okay, that's it.
Come on, fool. Get your ass up. Come on.
761
00:55:22,762 --> 00:55:25,287
You're crazy.
762
00:55:27,367 --> 00:55:31,133
What the hell is this?
Am I supposed to believe that you know "bujitsu"?
763
00:55:31,204 --> 00:55:32,637
Sayonara, sucker.
764
00:55:41,114 --> 00:55:43,048
All right.
765
00:55:43,116 --> 00:55:45,949
Meter reads 3.90. Here's
4.00. Keep the dime. Jerk.
766
00:55:46,019 --> 00:55:49,455
Ah, the lovely Miss Guilford.
Where you on your way to?
767
00:55:49,522 --> 00:55:52,286
Home.
Home? What do you mean? We got business to talk.
768
00:55:52,358 --> 00:55:56,454
All you seem to be is talk. I'm starting to think
you don't even have a formula.
769
00:55:56,529 --> 00:55:58,463
Oh-
We're gonna stick with Klump.
770
00:55:58,531 --> 00:56:01,523
Stick with Klump? I just got off the phone
with my research people in Langley, Virginia.
771
00:56:01,601 --> 00:56:05,037
They're working out all the minorkinks. We gonna
have a formula any moment now.
772
00:56:05,104 --> 00:56:07,402
Hey! Klump's formula sucks!
773
00:56:12,612 --> 00:56:14,842
All right, little man.
774
00:56:14,914 --> 00:56:17,576
I've been
real patient.
775
00:56:17,650 --> 00:56:21,313
I told you I'd mess you up.
776
00:56:27,493 --> 00:56:30,758
Oh, you scared now, huh?
Bring your little butt back here.
777
00:56:30,830 --> 00:56:32,764
I'm tired ofyour-
778
00:56:34,734 --> 00:56:37,567
Damn.
779
00:56:37,637 --> 00:56:39,502
He done loosen
my tooth too.
780
00:56:45,678 --> 00:56:48,476
So that's where
Sherman's been hiding it.
781
00:56:48,548 --> 00:56:51,073
Klumpville.
Chunkytown.
782
00:56:51,150 --> 00:56:53,880
Big-ass City.
783
00:57:03,596 --> 00:57:07,123
Clesius. Clesius. Lord have mercy.
What have you been all evening?
784
00:57:07,200 --> 00:57:09,293
I've been so worried.
Wait. Don't turn on the light.
785
00:57:09,369 --> 00:57:13,430
Leave the light out.
Oh, Clesius, I'm so sorry about what happened tonight.
786
00:57:13,506 --> 00:57:15,770
Yeah, well- Anna,
787
00:57:15,842 --> 00:57:18,936
you remember
when we first met?
788
00:57:19,012 --> 00:57:21,708
Ofcourse I remember.
Back at the state fair. Why?
789
00:57:21,781 --> 00:57:25,683
Yeah, the state fair.
You was working the cotton candy.
790
00:57:25,752 --> 00:57:29,586
Standing looking like an angel. Had
that pink sugar swirling all around you.
791
00:57:29,655 --> 00:57:32,590
I turned to my brother,
and I said three words,
792
00:57:32,658 --> 00:57:35,752
"Mighty fine. "
793
00:57:37,830 --> 00:57:41,596
You must've ate 16 cotton candies
that night, Clesius.
794
00:57:41,667 --> 00:57:44,101
Yeah, well,
I was interested.
795
00:57:44,170 --> 00:57:46,695
I was interested.
I was damn interested.
796
00:57:50,510 --> 00:57:52,671
Closeyoureyes, Anna.
I got a little surprise for you.
797
00:57:52,745 --> 00:57:56,306
Oh, Clesius.
798
00:57:56,382 --> 00:57:59,112
Oh!
799
00:57:59,185 --> 00:58:01,710
Here lam. I'm ready,
andl'm waiting.
800
00:58:01,788 --> 00:58:03,915
Oh, that some nasty stuff.
Okay, what you got for me?
801
00:58:03,990 --> 00:58:07,926
It wouldn't be
a surprise if I told you.
802
00:58:07,994 --> 00:58:10,258
Oh, you always been
such a sexy devil.
803
00:58:13,099 --> 00:58:15,067
Oh, Clesius,
I'm on fire.
804
00:58:15,134 --> 00:58:18,626
Oh, Clesius!
Hurr, Clesius.
805
00:58:18,704 --> 00:58:21,298
Hurr, Clesius!
806
00:58:21,374 --> 00:58:23,672
Hurry, Clesius.
Hurry. Hurry, Clesius.
807
00:58:23,743 --> 00:58:25,938
Yeah, yeah.
I've been waiting so long.
808
00:58:26,012 --> 00:58:29,311
Clesius, I'm on fire.
I know you've been waiting, baby.
809
00:58:29,382 --> 00:58:32,545
Oh, Clesius, this is so romantic.
Yeah, Clesius here now.
810
00:58:32,618 --> 00:58:34,950
I'm on fire. Anna Pearl, Anna Pearl.
811
00:58:35,021 --> 00:58:39,390
Yeah,
I'm gonna put your fire out.
812
00:58:39,459 --> 00:58:42,214
It's okay, baby. It's okay.
813
00:58:42,348 --> 00:58:44,578
Anna, it's me. It's me. It's
Clesius. I'm just young again.
814
00:58:44,650 --> 00:58:47,118
Oh, Lord, Clesius, what
have you done to yourself?
815
00:58:47,186 --> 00:58:49,245
I took some of Sherman's youth juice,
and it's incredible.
816
00:58:49,321 --> 00:58:52,449
I got enough
for both of us too.
817
00:58:52,524 --> 00:58:55,118
Damn. Don't worry about it. I got some more
in the garage. I'm not taking that mess.
818
00:58:55,194 --> 00:58:57,219
I don't want
no magic formula.
819
00:58:57,296 --> 00:59:00,527
What's wrong with you, woman? Don't you wanna be young?
No, I don't wanna be young.
820
00:59:00,599 --> 00:59:04,865
Clesius, we're supposed to be who we
are, andl'm just fine with who lam.
821
00:59:04,937 --> 00:59:08,703
But, obviously, what you're tring
to say is that you'rejust tired...
822
00:59:08,774 --> 00:59:11,971
of the fat, old woman that you got married to.
Oh, no, Anna.
823
00:59:12,044 --> 00:59:14,535
That's not what I'm saying.
That ain't what I'm saying at all.
824
00:59:14,613 --> 00:59:17,605
Downstairs. I think you better sleep
downstairs. Anna, please, no, baby.
825
00:59:17,683 --> 00:59:21,210
But I was just- - Downstairs,
Clesius. I don't wanna hear it.
826
00:59:24,890 --> 00:59:28,223
Oh, Clesius, I'm so
disappointed in you.
827
00:59:31,530 --> 00:59:35,967
I just feel so god-awful terrible
about what happened to Crackers.
828
00:59:36,034 --> 00:59:38,229
Imagine what your parents
must think about me.
829
00:59:38,303 --> 00:59:40,567
Sherman, you were acting
really strange tonight.
830
00:59:40,639 --> 00:59:43,130
Yeah, I know, 'cause,
um, I drank that wine,
831
00:59:43,208 --> 00:59:45,574
and I had cold medicine
early on.
832
00:59:45,644 --> 00:59:48,704
And mixing cold medicine
and wine- that don't mix.
833
00:59:48,781 --> 00:59:50,874
Well, cold medicine
or not,
834
00:59:50,949 --> 00:59:53,440
I'm really worried
about you.
835
00:59:53,519 --> 00:59:55,919
And I really think you
should get a checkup.
836
00:59:57,723 --> 01:00:00,419
All right. I will.
Yeah, I will.
837
01:00:00,492 --> 01:00:02,960
Okay. Go home
and get some rest,
838
01:00:03,028 --> 01:00:05,997
and first thing in the morning,
I'll make an appointment to get a checkup.
839
01:00:06,064 --> 01:00:09,158
Good. See you tomorrow.
See you tomorrow.
840
01:00:09,234 --> 01:00:12,829
Sorry about Crackers. I'm sorry. Okay?
Okay. Okay.
841
01:00:15,574 --> 01:00:17,508
Mm.
842
01:00:20,412 --> 01:00:23,540
Pervert.
"Beef in your taco. "
843
01:00:26,652 --> 01:00:29,746
I'm a pony! I'm a pony!
Mommy, I'm scared.
844
01:00:29,822 --> 01:00:31,619
Nowback
to the midnight movie.
845
01:00:36,829 --> 01:00:40,026
A huge asteroid, approximately
1,000 square miles in size,
846
01:00:40,098 --> 01:00:43,329
is still on
a collision course with Earth.
847
01:00:46,171 --> 01:00:48,571
Wellman College Professor
Sherman Klump...
848
01:00:48,640 --> 01:00:53,134
is attempting to plant a nuclear explosive
device deep within the asteroid core,
849
01:00:53,212 --> 01:00:55,305
which, if effective,
will destroy it.
850
01:01:00,018 --> 01:01:02,885
Houston, come in.
This is Professor Klump on the asteroid's surface.
851
01:01:02,955 --> 01:01:05,890
We read you, Professor.
What's your status?
852
01:01:05,958 --> 01:01:08,927
We've done dug the hole
and planted the nukes.
853
01:01:08,994 --> 01:01:11,690
Good. Then get back in your shuttle
and get the hell out of there...
854
01:01:11,763 --> 01:01:14,391
so you can blow
that rock to bits.
855
01:01:14,466 --> 01:01:17,560
Sherman, you've got 30 seconds
before that asteroid hits. Better hurry.
856
01:01:17,636 --> 01:01:19,729
The world's counting on it.
857
01:01:24,576 --> 01:01:27,670
Fifteen seconds.
Sherman, start the detonation sequence now.
858
01:01:29,248 --> 01:01:31,842
Hello, Houston.
We got a big-assproblem.
859
01:01:31,917 --> 01:01:35,409
Sherman, you've got to blow up
the asteroid. Press that button!
860
01:01:35,487 --> 01:01:38,752
I... can't... reach it.
Sherman.
861
01:01:41,727 --> 01:01:45,424
Sherman, I am your father.
Search your feelings, Sherman.
862
01:01:45,497 --> 01:01:50,958
There's a force deep down inside you. Use it.
Use your force, Sherman.
863
01:01:51,036 --> 01:01:53,800
Of course.
864
01:01:56,909 --> 01:02:01,209
Ah, yes.
The force is strong with you, my son.
865
01:02:01,280 --> 01:02:03,771
Goddamn.
What the hell was that noise?
866
01:02:03,849 --> 01:02:07,148
Whew! I think something crawled
up your force and died, Sherman.
867
01:02:12,858 --> 01:02:17,022
Ten seconds to impact.
My God!
868
01:02:17,095 --> 01:02:20,462
He didn't plant those charges
on the asteroid. Then where did he plant them?
869
01:02:22,768 --> 01:02:24,497
Okay.
870
01:02:24,570 --> 01:02:27,505
Good-bye, Mr. Asteroid.
871
01:02:27,573 --> 01:02:30,633
This is gonna be good. Yeah.
872
01:02:30,709 --> 01:02:35,510
Wait a minute. Did I land on the wrong
Oh, shit.
873
01:02:41,453 --> 01:02:44,513
Oh, no. I done blowed up
the wrong one.
874
01:02:44,590 --> 01:02:46,490
Good-bye, Sherman.
875
01:02:46,558 --> 01:02:48,753
Denise, please don't-
It was an accident. Denise-
876
01:02:48,827 --> 01:02:52,228
I'm sure it'I I just make a little
splash in the ocean. That's all.
877
01:02:52,297 --> 01:02:54,731
See,just a little, tiny-
878
01:02:54,800 --> 01:02:57,234
Oh, that ain't tiny
at all, is it?
879
01:03:04,910 --> 01:03:06,844
I am an idiot.
880
01:03:10,248 --> 01:03:13,376
Oh, thank you, Granny, so much.
You are too sweet.
881
01:03:13,452 --> 01:03:16,353
Yeah, that's a little special present
for your wedding night.
882
01:03:16,421 --> 01:03:18,252
Oh, fabulous.
Romantic and fabulous.
883
01:03:18,323 --> 01:03:21,019
Oh, Mama!
884
01:03:21,093 --> 01:03:23,027
Ooh!
885
01:03:23,095 --> 01:03:28,055
Thank you, Granny. Maybe something I
wouldn't have chosen for myself. Thank you.
886
01:03:28,133 --> 01:03:30,795
Well, I didn't choose it for you, baby.
I got it for Sherman.
887
01:03:30,869 --> 01:03:34,361
He's gonna be the one that's gonna appreciate
the hell out of it, trust me.
888
01:03:34,439 --> 01:03:39,399
Girls, I got tago check on the rest of
my surprise. Y'all excuse me fora moment.
889
01:03:39,478 --> 01:03:43,005
Girls, Isawthe most fabulousgame the
otherday. It's calledBachelorette Bingo.
890
01:03:43,081 --> 01:03:46,312
Let'splay.
Oh, this is so fabulous!
891
01:04:08,874 --> 01:04:14,210
This is Miss Ida Mae Jensen.
I'm calling to confirm a male stripper fantasy,
892
01:04:14,279 --> 01:04:17,248
the Muy Caliente
Vida Loca special.
893
01:04:26,258 --> 01:04:29,022
Goddamn.
894
01:04:42,107 --> 01:04:47,044
Yeah, that's right. Well, where
they at? We all ready here. Now-
895
01:04:47,112 --> 01:04:49,478
Oh, never mind.
896
01:04:49,548 --> 01:04:51,675
Isee him
overhere now. Okay.
897
01:04:51,750 --> 01:04:55,618
Yes, we will enjoy.
Thankyou.
898
01:04:55,687 --> 01:04:59,418
Now, that's what I call
the Muy Caliente...
899
01:04:59,491 --> 01:05:02,187
El Negro special.
900
01:05:02,260 --> 01:05:04,353
Mmm-mmm!
901
01:05:23,882 --> 01:05:26,544
Hey.
902
01:05:26,618 --> 01:05:28,552
Well, hello there,
stripper man.
903
01:05:28,620 --> 01:05:33,353
Now, you know, lordered the special, and
you supposed to be dressed as a fireman.
904
01:05:33,425 --> 01:05:37,054
Stripperman? Oh, stripper
Oh, yes, stripperman.
905
01:05:37,129 --> 01:05:39,529
Well, I, um
I decided not to do my fii reman dance tonight,
906
01:05:39,598 --> 01:05:42,533
because last time I did it, things got
so heated up, kind of scorched my suit.
907
01:05:42,601 --> 01:05:46,002
So I decided to do my cat burglar dance.
And I slip through the back door...
908
01:05:46,071 --> 01:05:48,335
and I'm kind of poking around,
'cause I'm a method stripper...
909
01:05:48,406 --> 01:05:50,931
and I want to get the right frame of mind so I can
give y'all some good stripping.
910
01:05:51,009 --> 01:05:55,946
You know, work it for you.
You know, you look just like Ken Norton in Mandingo.
911
01:05:56,014 --> 01:05:59,040
Oh, really? Oh, Ken Norton
Oh, Mandingo. Ken Norton. Really?
912
01:05:59,117 --> 01:06:02,484
I guess this is the closest I'm
gonna ever get to Ken Norton.
913
01:06:02,554 --> 01:06:06,064
Well, thank you so much.
Thank you. Thank you.
914
01:06:06,133 --> 01:06:08,658
I wonder if you could
give me a little private dance.
915
01:06:08,735 --> 01:06:11,135
Oh, okay. You want a private
You wanna slow down?
916
01:06:11,204 --> 01:06:13,399
Stop, stop, stop! I'm
gonna need some space here.
917
01:06:13,473 --> 01:06:16,033
You want a private dance.
Okay, I can do that.
918
01:06:16,109 --> 01:06:20,842
But first, um, I'm so thirsty. I got a craving for some
- for some red fruit punch.
919
01:06:20,914 --> 01:06:24,247
Red fruit punch? I ain't
seen none in the house, boy.
920
01:06:24,317 --> 01:06:26,683
But today I seen some out in the
Frigidaire, out in the garage.
921
01:06:26,753 --> 01:06:29,415
Oh, there may be some in the garage?
Well, after I quench my thirst,
922
01:06:29,489 --> 01:06:31,753
I'm gonna come give you a dance. Ow!
923
01:06:31,825 --> 01:06:34,988
I'll be moving like this. You like that,
don't you? Yeah, that's like Soul Train.
924
01:06:35,061 --> 01:06:37,996
That's la vida loca. Make this
face here like I'm tearing it up.
925
01:06:38,064 --> 01:06:41,659
Oh, good Lord. Oh, my
precious Lord. You like that?
926
01:06:41,735 --> 01:06:44,863
Don't move now. I ain't going nowhere.
I'll be right here for the Soul Train.
927
01:06:44,938 --> 01:06:50,342
I'll be right back.
For the Soul Train!
928
01:06:50,410 --> 01:06:52,378
I'll be right back.
929
01:06:54,247 --> 01:06:56,579
Oh, my goodness,
is there a fii re?
930
01:06:56,650 --> 01:07:00,245
Yes, ma'am, I'm afraid there
is. I don't smell no smoke.
931
01:07:02,956 --> 01:07:04,924
There's a fii re
in my pants...
932
01:07:04,991 --> 01:07:07,221
and it's getting
muy caliente!
933
01:07:07,294 --> 01:07:11,390
Oh, Lord, have mercy!
A strip- Oh, my!
934
01:07:13,099 --> 01:07:15,863
My mother must've
arranged this.
935
01:07:17,103 --> 01:07:19,571
Where are you? Oop-
936
01:07:19,639 --> 01:07:22,767
Oh, bingo! Bingo.
937
01:07:22,843 --> 01:07:25,812
Chunky Butt, thank you so much
for making this easy.
938
01:07:25,879 --> 01:07:27,904
I thought this was
gonna be diffiicult.
939
01:07:27,981 --> 01:07:30,541
Chunky Butt made this
a nice, easy task forme.
940
01:07:30,617 --> 01:07:32,881
Yes, yes, yes.
941
01:07:35,188 --> 01:07:38,783
Perfect. Now I gotta find
something to cut this with.
942
01:07:38,859 --> 01:07:40,793
Maybe a little
fertilizer or something.
943
01:07:40,861 --> 01:07:45,457
Oh, this is gonna
be perfect, Chunky Butt.
944
01:07:45,532 --> 01:07:50,367
I think this will help spruce up your presentation
quite a bit.
945
01:07:53,473 --> 01:07:55,304
Oh, Lord!
946
01:07:55,375 --> 01:08:00,078
I didn't know there was
gonna be a stripper.
947
01:08:01,348 --> 01:08:05,717
Mama! Mama!
948
01:08:16,596 --> 01:08:20,760
Love
949
01:08:20,834 --> 01:08:27,933
Is a many
splendoredthing
950
01:08:28,008 --> 01:08:31,000
It's the April-rose
951
01:08:31,077 --> 01:08:34,171
That only grows
952
01:08:34,247 --> 01:08:38,809
In the early spring
953
01:08:39,886 --> 01:08:42,650
Love is nature's way
954
01:08:42,722 --> 01:08:45,885
Of giving
955
01:08:45,959 --> 01:08:51,488
A reason to be living
956
01:08:51,564 --> 01:08:54,158
The golden crown
957
01:08:54,234 --> 01:08:55,724
That makes a man
958
01:08:55,802 --> 01:08:58,965
A king
959
01:09:00,640 --> 01:09:04,167
Oh, we gonna have the whole
room smelling like ass.
960
01:09:04,244 --> 01:09:08,476
Shake it, shake. And it's
like I was never here.
961
01:09:08,548 --> 01:09:11,016
Oh! Oh!
962
01:09:11,084 --> 01:09:13,917
Hey! You scared me just now.
I thought you was a monster.
963
01:09:13,987 --> 01:09:15,921
Mmm-mmm!
What areyou-
964
01:09:15,989 --> 01:09:19,755
Hey, what-
Stripper man, stripper man.
965
01:09:19,826 --> 01:09:23,057
You're not supposed to be out here.
This must be your lucky night.
966
01:09:23,129 --> 01:09:26,565
You're supposed to be in the house.
I'm fiittin' to teach you...
967
01:09:26,633 --> 01:09:29,193
ever trick I know.
968
01:09:29,269 --> 01:09:33,205
I seen the way you logging me inside.
No, no, no, no.
969
01:09:33,273 --> 01:09:35,571
I'm logging you too.
970
01:09:35,642 --> 01:09:40,477
Oh!
Oh! Oh! Oh!
971
01:09:42,582 --> 01:09:45,449
Oh, stripper man.
972
01:09:45,518 --> 01:09:48,248
Oh, I feel so vulnerable.
973
01:09:48,321 --> 01:09:51,586
Come on. Let's get it on right
now, right here, right now.
974
01:09:51,658 --> 01:09:54,593
Oh, stripper. Wait. Just calm
Relax a second.
975
01:09:54,661 --> 01:09:57,425
Now, listen. We gonna get
it on. But not out here.
976
01:09:57,497 --> 01:09:59,692
You don't wanna get it on out here,
do you, in this nasty, stink garage?
977
01:09:59,766 --> 01:10:02,735
Let's go in the house in a warm
bed where I can give you the shimmy.
978
01:10:02,802 --> 01:10:06,966
I'll meet you in your room. I
ain't falling for that trick.
979
01:10:07,040 --> 01:10:08,974
I'm gonna get that knot
out your back.
980
01:10:09,042 --> 01:10:12,773
You gonna have togive me
a little sugar right now, or I'll scream.
981
01:10:12,846 --> 01:10:15,838
No, no, don't scream.
Don't scream.
982
01:10:15,915 --> 01:10:19,373
No, no, no. Shh, shh.
Wait, wait, wait. I'll give you a little kiss.
983
01:10:19,452 --> 01:10:23,718
A little peck on the cheek. Meet you
up in the room. Ain't gonna hurt nobody.
984
01:10:23,790 --> 01:10:27,282
You're so cute. Come here.
I want a little sugar.
985
01:10:28,361 --> 01:10:31,922
Oh, God!
986
01:10:31,998 --> 01:10:34,398
Oh, Ken Norton!
987
01:10:53,086 --> 01:10:56,647
Folks, we want toget everybody
into the presentation,
988
01:10:56,723 --> 01:10:58,748
so please have
your press credentials ready.
989
01:11:13,373 --> 01:11:17,366
Well, if it isn't ol' Chunky Butt.
Buddy, what are you doing here?
990
01:11:17,444 --> 01:11:20,436
I just came down for your big
presentation. You're not nervous, are you?
991
01:11:20,513 --> 01:11:22,777
No, I ain't nervous. "No,
I ain't. " "No, I ain't. "
992
01:11:22,849 --> 01:11:25,647
That's interesting. Starting
to sound kind of ignorant.
993
01:11:25,718 --> 01:11:27,652
But don't worry.
If this professor thing don't work out,
994
01:11:27,720 --> 01:11:29,984
there's always room for another brother
down at the car wash.
995
01:11:30,056 --> 01:11:31,990
They could put a big
beach towel on your ass,
996
01:11:32,058 --> 01:11:33,992
and you can stand
in the doorway as the cars come out...
997
01:11:34,060 --> 01:11:35,994
and dry 'em
a side at a time.
998
01:11:36,062 --> 01:11:39,998
That's your future.
Buddy, I notice since the split-up...
999
01:11:40,066 --> 01:11:43,797
that, uh, I ain't really
I haven't really felt like myself.
1000
01:11:43,870 --> 01:11:45,804
I was wondering if you've been
experiencing any changes.
1001
01:11:45,872 --> 01:11:48,397
Not at all. I feel great. Never
felt better in my life.
1002
01:11:48,475 --> 01:11:51,205
Business is really starting
to look up for me, Sherm.
1003
01:11:52,712 --> 01:11:55,010
Hey, you betterrun!
Come here!
1004
01:11:55,081 --> 01:11:57,413
Come here, pussy! You're a
pussy! That's what you are.
1005
01:11:57,484 --> 01:12:00,578
I'll killyou! I'll killyou!
Come here, you pussy!
1006
01:12:00,653 --> 01:12:02,587
Sherman coming on in a minute.
1007
01:12:02,655 --> 01:12:05,818
Well, what channel's
Sherman gonna come on? Anybody know?
1008
01:12:05,892 --> 01:12:09,328
Have some of these brownies. They're
still warm. Don't drop 'em on my floor now.
1009
01:12:09,395 --> 01:12:12,523
All right, everbody. Sherman getting ready
to come on TV now. Everbody gather around.
1010
01:12:12,599 --> 01:12:14,897
You know,
fame is gonna pass.
1011
01:12:14,968 --> 01:12:16,902
And the only thing that's
permanent is family.
1012
01:12:16,970 --> 01:12:19,803
Ain't that right, Daddy?
Oh, shit! Get your ass out that chair!
1013
01:12:19,873 --> 01:12:22,808
How many times, Ernest, I gotta tell
you to stay out my damn chair? Aw, man.
1014
01:12:22,876 --> 01:12:25,811
You work on them cars all day gonna put the
grease all in my chair, smear the grease there.
1015
01:12:25,879 --> 01:12:28,609
Gotta sit on this grease. My gray pants
still got grease all over 'em 'cause ofyou.
1016
01:12:28,681 --> 01:12:30,945
You happy? You got your chair. Enjoy.
Stay out my damn chair.
1017
01:12:31,017 --> 01:12:35,283
Ernest, will you please tell your
father to be quiet? Sherman's coming on.
1018
01:12:35,355 --> 01:12:37,516
What channel Sherman come on?
Tell me what she just said,
1019
01:12:37,590 --> 01:12:40,286
I'll come over there and whup your ass.
1020
01:12:40,360 --> 01:12:43,090
That's the channel.
Watch the damn TV.
1021
01:12:43,163 --> 01:12:46,223
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen
for coming out. My name is Professor Sherman Klump.
1022
01:12:46,299 --> 01:12:49,530
I'm a professor here
at Wellman College.
1023
01:12:49,602 --> 01:12:52,093
Ooh!
Look at him.
1024
01:12:52,172 --> 01:12:55,107
Joe College.
Look how dashing he look. He look just like Billy Dee.
1025
01:12:55,175 --> 01:12:58,941
Boy look handsome.
Billy Dee! Billy Dee! Billy Dee! Billy Dee!
1026
01:12:59,012 --> 01:13:01,776
Billy Dee Klump.
As you all know,
1027
01:13:01,848 --> 01:13:05,716
Ponce de Leon searched his entire life
for the Fountain ofYouth.
1028
01:13:05,785 --> 01:13:08,754
And today we will
complete his journey.
1029
01:13:08,821 --> 01:13:12,587
So, uh, ladies and gentlemen,
I'dlike to present to you all,
1030
01:13:12,659 --> 01:13:17,562
uh, the Wellman College
youth formula.
1031
01:13:17,630 --> 01:13:20,224
Maybe I need to take some ofthat.
It don't cure ugly.
1032
01:13:20,300 --> 01:13:22,768
Does Clesius
know I'm strapped?
1033
01:13:22,835 --> 01:13:25,565
Well, come on. Shoot. Come on. Shoot.
I'm strapped, nigga.
1034
01:13:25,638 --> 01:13:27,469
Tell him. I'm strapped.
And ifyou miss, I'm gonna finish you off.
1035
01:13:27,540 --> 01:13:30,304
If you don't have anything nice
to say, don't say nothing at all.
1036
01:13:30,376 --> 01:13:33,345
Well, she messin' with me.
Stop the violence. Stop the violence.
1037
01:13:33,413 --> 01:13:36,678
And don't say nothing.
I'm tring to watch Sherman.
1038
01:13:36,749 --> 01:13:38,683
Okay, cool, cool.
1039
01:13:40,353 --> 01:13:42,514
Boy, would I like to throw
some hot grease on you.
1040
01:13:45,510 --> 01:13:49,037
This is Molly. Molly is a
one-year-old, and Petey is four.
1041
01:13:49,113 --> 01:13:53,641
Petey is our candidate for
genetic "transmografiication. "
1042
01:13:55,620 --> 01:13:59,386
Petey here
Petey is ourcandidate forgenetic "transmofilectesy. "
1043
01:13:59,457 --> 01:14:02,085
Genetic "transgromanation. "
1044
01:14:02,159 --> 01:14:04,787
The "youthification-"
That ain't a word.
1045
01:14:04,862 --> 01:14:06,796
Howcome Uncle Sherman's
talking funny?
1046
01:14:06,864 --> 01:14:10,300
He's starting to sound like you, Dad.
He don't sound right, do he?
1047
01:14:10,368 --> 01:14:13,064
What do you mean, "sound like me"? What's that?
Sherman up in a ivor tower...
1048
01:14:13,137 --> 01:14:15,071
just 'cause
he went to college.
1049
01:14:15,139 --> 01:14:18,267
I could've gone to college
if I took that damn...
1050
01:14:18,342 --> 01:14:21,106
elastic "appitude" test.
1051
01:14:21,178 --> 01:14:23,772
Hey, shut up.
What the hell's wrong with Sherman?
1052
01:14:23,848 --> 01:14:27,807
You be breaking me down
in front of my seed on the regular.
1053
01:14:27,885 --> 01:14:31,082
The reason we, uh- he-
We gonna make him young.
1054
01:14:31,155 --> 01:14:34,921
So I say, um,
let's get it on!
1055
01:14:38,496 --> 01:14:41,397
I'm gonna just give
a drop ofthis to Petey.
1056
01:14:41,465 --> 01:14:43,865
We watch and see
what happens.
1057
01:14:58,716 --> 01:15:01,048
Isaac, you watching that?
Hey, that ain't right.
1058
01:15:02,687 --> 01:15:06,885
Hamsters will be hamsters, huh?
Oh!
1059
01:15:30,147 --> 01:15:32,377
What in blazes- -
Oh! - Look at that!
1060
01:15:32,450 --> 01:15:35,146
That's cool. That's real cool.
Look at that!
1061
01:15:35,219 --> 01:15:36,846
Petey!
Down, boy!
1062
01:15:48,599 --> 01:15:52,262
Petey!
Shoot him! Shoot him!
1063
01:16:30,508 --> 01:16:33,705
No, no. No. Please,
I'm not that kindof-
1064
01:16:33,778 --> 01:16:35,643
Guy
1065
01:16:38,049 --> 01:16:41,041
Oh, my God. I have to turn
the channel. I don't want my babyseeing that.
1066
01:16:41,118 --> 01:16:43,450
That man ain't never gonna be right again.
Oh!
1067
01:16:43,521 --> 01:16:46,319
Somebody need to take Isaac's pressure.
Oh, what's wrong with this?
1068
01:16:46,390 --> 01:16:48,551
Something like that will ruin a man.
Coverthe baby's eyes.
1069
01:16:48,626 --> 01:16:51,254
That's too much excitement for my baby.
Turn the channel.
1070
01:16:51,328 --> 01:16:54,764
- I can't even turn. - That's
nasty. - That's what that is.
1071
01:16:54,832 --> 01:16:57,460
Turn the baby's eyes.
And he don't need to know what it is, Mama.
1072
01:16:57,535 --> 01:17:00,402
Now, was that
supposed to happen?
1073
01:17:02,773 --> 01:17:06,072
It's the lovely Miss Guilford.
Mr. Love.
1074
01:17:06,143 --> 01:17:08,338
What a wonderful day
we're having, huh?
1075
01:17:08,412 --> 01:17:10,346
Why am I not surprised
to see you here?
1076
01:17:10,414 --> 01:17:13,042
Well, I figured since it turns out that
Professor Klump ain't your man after all,
1077
01:17:13,117 --> 01:17:15,051
you might wanna talk
a deal.
1078
01:17:17,655 --> 01:17:21,421
All right. Have your formula
ready for presentation on Friday.
1079
01:17:21,492 --> 01:17:23,426
Friday it is.
1080
01:17:23,494 --> 01:17:25,519
See you Friday. Lovely dress. Mm-hmm.
1081
01:17:25,596 --> 01:17:27,530
I'll wear
something sharp.
1082
01:17:35,606 --> 01:17:37,904
Oh, Dean. I'm just tring to figure out
what went wrong here.
1083
01:17:37,975 --> 01:17:41,376
I just don't understand. It must've been
some sort of contaminant or something.
1084
01:17:41,445 --> 01:17:45,506
The deal with Phleer is off. I
just spoke to Leanne Guilford.
1085
01:17:45,583 --> 01:17:47,517
But that
doesn't botherme.
1086
01:17:47,585 --> 01:17:50,918
After all,
what's $150 million?
1087
01:17:50,988 --> 01:17:54,981
Oh! Dean Richmond,
I am so sorry.
1088
01:17:55,059 --> 01:17:58,290
I'm really tring to get to the bottom of this, because
this was not supposed to happen.
1089
01:17:58,362 --> 01:18:00,353
No, that's not
what bothers me.
1090
01:18:00,431 --> 01:18:02,524
Deals will come
and deals will go.
1091
01:18:02,600 --> 01:18:05,569
Wellman...
will always be Wellman.
1092
01:18:05,636 --> 01:18:08,104
But I'll tell you
what does bother me.
1093
01:18:08,172 --> 01:18:11,539
On the way over here, a cute
little boy pointed at me and said,
1094
01:18:11,609 --> 01:18:15,773
"Oh, look, Mommy, there
goes the hamster's bitch!"
1095
01:18:25,689 --> 01:18:28,886
Uh-
Dean, whatever it's worth,
1096
01:18:28,959 --> 01:18:33,089
Petey is back to normal and
feelingjust fine. Oh, yeah?
1097
01:18:33,164 --> 01:18:36,156
Do you think he'll call?
1098
01:18:36,233 --> 01:18:40,693
Dean, I just want to tell you, I'm
I'm sorry. Stop... speaking!
1099
01:18:40,771 --> 01:18:45,174
I just want to go on record as saying that-
1100
01:18:45,242 --> 01:18:49,372
Shh, shh, shh.
Shh, shh, shh.
1101
01:18:50,981 --> 01:18:55,247
I've been looking forward to saying
something to you for 12 years.
1102
01:18:55,319 --> 01:18:58,413
And here it is.
1103
01:18:58,489 --> 01:19:02,186
You're fat!
1104
01:19:05,763 --> 01:19:10,257
And dumb.
1105
01:19:12,336 --> 01:19:14,304
And fired.
1106
01:19:33,057 --> 01:19:34,991
Sherman.
1107
01:19:35,059 --> 01:19:37,425
It's not your fault.
1108
01:19:37,494 --> 01:19:40,054
I ain't never-
1109
01:19:40,130 --> 01:19:42,496
I'm never gonna be the same again, am I?
1110
01:19:42,566 --> 01:19:44,659
I'm afraid not.
1111
01:19:51,041 --> 01:19:55,205
Since you've separated
brain cells have been damaged.
1112
01:19:55,279 --> 01:19:58,806
your speech and memory-
1113
01:19:58,883 --> 01:20:01,351
I know.
I'll be a total idiot.
1114
01:20:03,754 --> 01:20:06,416
Don't you think it's
time you told Denise?
1115
01:20:06,490 --> 01:20:09,220
Oh, no, Jason.
I can't do that.
1116
01:20:09,293 --> 01:20:11,727
How can I tell her
I'm losing the very thing...
1117
01:20:11,795 --> 01:20:14,423
that made her fall in love
with me in the first place?
1118
01:20:17,067 --> 01:20:19,001
Mm-mmm.
1119
01:20:38,222 --> 01:20:41,191
Hi.
Sherman, what are you doing here?
1120
01:20:43,994 --> 01:20:48,021
How you doing?
Your mama told me I might be able to find you here.
1121
01:20:48,098 --> 01:20:51,033
I've been looking all over the place for
you. I've been leaving messages everwhere.
1122
01:20:51,101 --> 01:20:55,003
I went by your place. Yeah,
well, I had a lot on my mind.
1123
01:20:55,072 --> 01:20:58,041
You know, I walk around,
going around, getting time to think.
1124
01:20:58,108 --> 01:21:00,079
I wonder if I can talk
to you about something.
1125
01:21:00,213 --> 01:21:02,181
Look, I know you're upset
about what happened.
1126
01:21:02,248 --> 01:21:04,614
But we can get right back
to work with the youth formula,
1127
01:21:04,684 --> 01:21:07,619
and I think the problem-
No, not science.
1128
01:21:07,687 --> 01:21:11,214
Denise, I'm not
This isn't about science. We can start completely over.
1129
01:21:11,290 --> 01:21:14,088
We can find another university.
After the wedding, we can even-
1130
01:21:14,160 --> 01:21:17,027
That's what I'm talking
about- the wedding.
1131
01:21:17,096 --> 01:21:20,532
Denise, I don't think
there's going to be a wedding.
1132
01:21:20,600 --> 01:21:22,693
Well, not-
not right away anyway.
1133
01:21:22,768 --> 01:21:25,896
I mean, my head's just kind
of messed up right now,
1134
01:21:25,972 --> 01:21:28,270
and I don't think it'd be fair to you.
1135
01:21:28,341 --> 01:21:30,332
What?
1136
01:21:30,409 --> 01:21:32,877
I made a mistake.
1137
01:21:32,945 --> 01:21:36,472
And I have to work that mistake out.
I have to live with that.
1138
01:21:36,549 --> 01:21:40,576
Me, not you. See, you're so pretty,
and you're so smart.
1139
01:21:40,653 --> 01:21:42,587
You just got your whole life
ahead of you.
1140
01:21:42,655 --> 01:21:45,818
I just don't want to mess things up
foryou. I'm-
1141
01:21:45,891 --> 01:21:47,825
I'm sorry, Denise.
1142
01:21:53,966 --> 01:21:55,991
I think
I'd better get going.
1143
01:22:28,567 --> 01:22:30,933
You allright?
1144
01:22:31,003 --> 01:22:33,471
Oh, I just don't
understand, Clesius.
1145
01:22:33,539 --> 01:22:35,973
And he won't tell me why.
1146
01:22:36,042 --> 01:22:40,240
Anna, listen. Sometimes a man
do some crazy things, you know?
1147
01:22:40,313 --> 01:22:42,076
Oh!
1148
01:22:42,148 --> 01:22:45,276
Not that he's tring to hurt nobody. He's
not tring to tell you he don't love you.
1149
01:22:45,351 --> 01:22:47,512
It's just-
1150
01:22:47,586 --> 01:22:50,714
Sometimes you get kind of confused,
you know?
1151
01:22:54,360 --> 01:22:56,555
You hear
what I'm saying?
1152
01:22:57,963 --> 01:23:01,421
Yes, Clesius,
I hear what you're saying.
1153
01:23:01,500 --> 01:23:04,162
I'll talk to the boy.
1154
01:23:04,236 --> 01:23:06,227
Everthing
was so fabulous.
1155
01:23:06,305 --> 01:23:10,002
You cut out that cring
now. It's all right.
1156
01:23:10,076 --> 01:23:14,274
Stop all that crying.
Go clean your nose up.
1157
01:23:14,347 --> 01:23:17,783
Go wash your hands. Snot all over
the place looking nasty as hell.
1158
01:23:17,850 --> 01:23:21,911
What's this on me? Goddamn, look what you
put on me, Anna. What's this on me for?
1159
01:23:30,463 --> 01:23:32,397
Yeah, you know
something, Sherman?
1160
01:23:32,465 --> 01:23:35,025
The very first building I ever
worked on was on this site right here.
1161
01:23:35,101 --> 01:23:38,935
Yep. Isn't that
something? It was a baker.
1162
01:23:39,004 --> 01:23:41,495
Yeah.
Tore it down two years ago.
1163
01:23:41,574 --> 01:23:43,872
Thirty-fiive years later,
I wind up working on the thing,
1164
01:23:43,943 --> 01:23:46,377
building it up all over again;
ain't that something?
1165
01:23:46,445 --> 01:23:50,347
I expected the building
I worked on was permanent.
1166
01:23:50,416 --> 01:23:52,816
But I was wrong,
'cause it ain't.
1167
01:23:52,885 --> 01:23:55,513
That's not permanent.
You know what's permanent, Sherman?
1168
01:23:55,588 --> 01:23:58,489
You know what's permanent?
I'm gonna tell you.
1169
01:23:58,557 --> 01:24:01,685
What me and your mama got.
That's permanent.
1170
01:24:01,761 --> 01:24:04,662
That ain't going no place.
You know what I mean?
1171
01:24:04,730 --> 01:24:07,130
If you get you a woman that really,
really loves you,
1172
01:24:07,199 --> 01:24:09,394
you've got to hold on
to that, Sherman.
1173
01:24:12,138 --> 01:24:16,837
Yeah, that's true, Daddy.
Yeah, I knows I sure do love Denise.
1174
01:24:16,909 --> 01:24:19,434
Well, then y'all gotta
get back together then.
1175
01:24:21,347 --> 01:24:26,410
Get back together?
Daddy, that's it. Yeah.
1176
01:24:26,485 --> 01:24:30,854
Get back together. If we get back
together, that'll make everthing okay.
1177
01:24:30,923 --> 01:24:33,824
Dynamite. Go call the girl.
Say what? Not Denise. Buddy.
1178
01:24:33,893 --> 01:24:37,488
Me and Buddy get back together,
that'll make everthing fine between me and Denise.
1179
01:24:37,563 --> 01:24:40,259
Hey, you just took
the wrong off-ramp.
1180
01:24:40,332 --> 01:24:44,496
I can use the youth formula. I'll feed
it to Buddy. It'll make him so young.
1181
01:24:44,570 --> 01:24:48,097
I'll turn him back into Goop. And I ingest
I eat it! I eat it! Huh?
1182
01:24:48,174 --> 01:24:50,108
That's it.
Daddy, that'll work.
1183
01:24:50,176 --> 01:24:52,110
I wouldn't have even
thought about that.
1184
01:24:52,178 --> 01:24:54,203
This is fantastic!
What are you gonna eat?
1185
01:24:54,280 --> 01:24:56,680
Sherman! Damn!
1186
01:25:23,142 --> 01:25:25,542
Hello, Sherman.
I heard you were here.
1187
01:25:25,611 --> 01:25:29,308
Give me a minute, Dean, and I'll
be on my way. Trespass all you like.
1188
01:25:29,381 --> 01:25:33,317
It goes so well in court with grand theft.
I beg your pardon.
1189
01:25:33,385 --> 01:25:36,786
You're tring to sell the youth formula
under a different identity.
1190
01:25:36,856 --> 01:25:39,416
Who do you think you are? Dean,
you just don't understand, really.
1191
01:25:39,492 --> 01:25:42,655
That's always possible. Then help
me out if you don't mind. Explain it.
1192
01:25:42,728 --> 01:25:44,821
Why is Buddy Love
meeting with Phleer?
1193
01:25:44,897 --> 01:25:48,162
Oh, my goodness. I gotta
hurry up. Not so fast, pal.
1194
01:25:48,234 --> 01:25:50,759
I'm not letting you out of my sight
until both our names are on that contract.
1195
01:25:50,836 --> 01:25:54,397
I'm going to be stuck on you
like a giant hamster on my a-
1196
01:25:56,108 --> 01:25:59,805
Where you go, I go. I have no time to stand
here and argue with you.
1197
01:25:59,879 --> 01:26:02,439
Ifyou wanna come along,
I'll explain it to you on the way.
1198
01:26:02,515 --> 01:26:05,916
Ladies and gentlemen and
distinguished guests, it is showtime.
1199
01:26:05,985 --> 01:26:07,919
Now I'd like to present
to you exhibit "A."
1200
01:26:07,987 --> 01:26:10,114
His name is Zeke,
and it is ver clear...
1201
01:26:10,189 --> 01:26:13,590
that Zeke has been getting his ass whipped
by Father Time for many, many years.
1202
01:26:58,637 --> 01:27:00,628
Oh, my God, Sherman.
1203
01:27:07,379 --> 01:27:10,473
Sherman! Sherman!
Sherman!
1204
01:27:10,549 --> 01:27:13,074
Hey, hey, hey, Denise.
Thank God.
1205
01:27:13,152 --> 01:27:16,144
What the hell's going on?
Papa Klump, have you seen Sherman?
1206
01:27:16,221 --> 01:27:18,155
He's in trouble.
Oh, tell me about it.
1207
01:27:18,223 --> 01:27:21,249
First the boy acting crazy and called off the
wedding. Then he talking about eating some guy.
1208
01:27:21,327 --> 01:27:24,057
I don't know if it's something I need
to talk to the boy about.
1209
01:27:24,129 --> 01:27:27,155
Wait. Eating somebody?
Yeah, he said he's gonna eat some man.
1210
01:27:27,232 --> 01:27:29,427
Of course. Buddy.
1211
01:27:29,501 --> 01:27:31,765
Yeah, that's the guy.
What's going on between the three of y'all?
1212
01:27:31,837 --> 01:27:35,705
What's this, a kind of menage a trois?
I know where Sherman is.
1213
01:27:35,808 --> 01:27:39,710
Ladies and gentlemen, if Zeke dropped dead right now,
who would care?
1214
01:27:39,778 --> 01:27:42,406
I would.
My point exactly.
1215
01:27:42,481 --> 01:27:45,177
Exactly. That no person,
no matter who they are,
1216
01:27:45,250 --> 01:27:48,481
no matter how hopelessly
disgusting their case may be,
1217
01:27:48,554 --> 01:27:50,920
should be left
without a second chance.
1218
01:27:50,990 --> 01:27:54,926
And that is why I would like
to introduce... New You,
1219
01:27:54,994 --> 01:27:57,019
a fully copyrighted product
being offered to you...
1220
01:27:57,096 --> 01:27:58,893
by the good people
of Love Enterprises.
1221
01:27:58,964 --> 01:28:01,489
Now, if you'd be so kind,
Zeke, would you drink this up, please?
1222
01:28:01,567 --> 01:28:03,789
It's kind
of like Mogen David, but fruitier.
1223
01:28:03,923 --> 01:28:06,483
Wait! I'm sorry to interrupt,
ladies and gentlemen!
1224
01:28:06,558 --> 01:28:11,586
But I cannot go on living unless
I have this man inside me right now.
1225
01:28:11,664 --> 01:28:14,098
Steady, sailor.
What the hell is going on here?
1226
01:28:14,166 --> 01:28:17,260
Well, if it isn't Professor
Sherman Klump, the inventor of Jumbo the Horny Hamster.
1227
01:28:17,336 --> 01:28:21,534
Please!
Buddy, I am sick and I am tired...
1228
01:28:21,607 --> 01:28:24,735
of your s-h-
"I. "
1229
01:28:24,810 --> 01:28:27,608
Thank you. T-E.
1230
01:28:27,680 --> 01:28:30,240
My shite? Oh, really?
Well, what you gonna do about it, Shamu?
1231
01:28:30,316 --> 01:28:33,683
Tell you what I'm gonna do.
I don't have no time to play no games with your ass.
1232
01:28:33,752 --> 01:28:37,085
You got time to play a little catch, don't you?
Oh, you bastard.
1233
01:28:42,995 --> 01:28:45,429
Buddy.
1234
01:28:45,497 --> 01:28:49,024
Aw!
1235
01:28:49,101 --> 01:28:52,468
Buddy, Buddy. Buddy.
1236
01:28:52,538 --> 01:28:54,972
Get it, Buddy. Buddy!
1237
01:28:55,040 --> 01:28:57,975
Na, na, na, na.
Hey, Buddy. Fetch.
1238
01:29:14,827 --> 01:29:17,728
Aach!
1239
01:29:17,796 --> 01:29:19,787
What the hell is that?
1240
01:29:19,865 --> 01:29:22,129
Who's dumb now?
1241
01:29:26,138 --> 01:29:28,606
Oh, Sherman. Oh, you
sneaky son of a bitch.
1242
01:29:28,674 --> 01:29:31,268
Oh, Sherman!
1243
01:29:32,211 --> 01:29:34,270
Oh, no!
1244
01:29:36,181 --> 01:29:40,208
Oh, shit! Uh- ah- ah-
Everbody calm down.
1245
01:29:40,285 --> 01:29:42,981
This is a part of the demonstration.
Just calm- Relax.
1246
01:29:43,055 --> 01:29:45,580
Everything's undercontrol.
What the hell are you looking at?
1247
01:29:45,657 --> 01:29:48,785
This is an impressive package for a toddler.
All right, Mr. Toddler.
1248
01:29:48,861 --> 01:29:52,422
Nothing to see here, folks.
This mutant is about to dissolve into liquid,
1249
01:29:52,498 --> 01:29:54,864
and then the fat man is going
to suck him through a straw.
1250
01:29:54,933 --> 01:29:58,334
Sorry, Buddy.
I just want my life back.
1251
01:29:58,404 --> 01:30:01,271
You don't owe him any explan- What?
Come here.
1252
01:30:01,340 --> 01:30:04,434
Oh, you rotten
son of a- Oh!
1253
01:30:04,510 --> 01:30:07,172
I'm hit! I'm hit!
Forget it, fat ass.
1254
01:30:07,246 --> 01:30:11,342
I ain't going back
inside of you. Mmm. Got milk?
1255
01:30:13,886 --> 01:30:16,047
Thank you, baby.
1256
01:30:18,057 --> 01:30:20,855
He's getting away.
1257
01:30:20,926 --> 01:30:26,228
Dean, I want that formula. Bring me the man who made it.
I'm ready to make a deal.
1258
01:30:26,298 --> 01:30:28,232
Hmm? Right.
1259
01:30:30,302 --> 01:30:33,863
I'm naked! I'm naked! I'm
naked! I'm naked! I'm naked!
1260
01:30:38,377 --> 01:30:41,972
There he is.
What the hell is happening?
1261
01:30:50,422 --> 01:30:53,880
What the hell was that? Buddy.
1262
01:30:56,595 --> 01:30:58,529
All right, that's it. Slow
the car down! Slow down!
1263
01:30:58,597 --> 01:31:00,531
We can't help Sherman
wrapped around no light pole.
1264
01:31:00,599 --> 01:31:03,090
We've got to get to him. He and
Buddy have to be combined immediately.
1265
01:31:05,904 --> 01:31:08,338
Where's the little snot now?
1266
01:31:08,407 --> 01:31:11,103
What the hell are you looking at?
Come on.
1267
01:31:11,176 --> 01:31:13,406
What? What?
1268
01:31:15,280 --> 01:31:17,578
Don't feel right. Starting
to feel a little light-headed.
1269
01:31:17,649 --> 01:31:20,948
If you quit now, you're gonna be
empty-headed. Come on, Klump. Let's get him.
1270
01:31:21,019 --> 01:31:24,011
Get a hold of this, chubby.
1271
01:31:30,295 --> 01:31:32,957
Whoo!
You got a big ass!
1272
01:31:35,367 --> 01:31:38,700
What?
Follow that ass.
1273
01:31:41,073 --> 01:31:43,200
Aw, hell.
Now, what's all of this?
1274
01:31:43,275 --> 01:31:45,800
Move out the way, damn it!
Wait a minute. I think I see him.
1275
01:31:51,450 --> 01:31:54,044
Goddamn.
1276
01:31:55,621 --> 01:31:58,089
Oh, no. Don't even think about it.
Don't you do it.
1277
01:31:58,157 --> 01:32:00,216
Oh, you're doing it.
1278
01:32:03,962 --> 01:32:06,795
Ow!
Stop!
1279
01:32:14,406 --> 01:32:16,897
All right, tubby.
1280
01:32:16,975 --> 01:32:21,469
Let's see how long
you last without me.
1281
01:32:27,352 --> 01:32:30,412
What? What?
That's it?
1282
01:32:30,489 --> 01:32:33,458
He's gone?
Ah, I-I- da-da-
1283
01:32:33,525 --> 01:32:36,494
Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba.
Oh, that's marvelous.
1284
01:32:41,066 --> 01:32:44,263
The deal is dead,
you know that?
1285
01:32:44,336 --> 01:32:47,499
I've been calling you a moron for years.
Now you're finally-
1286
01:32:52,444 --> 01:32:55,436
I'll just get a cab.
1287
01:33:05,976 --> 01:33:10,072
Ohhh, Sherman!
I raised a genius.
1288
01:33:10,147 --> 01:33:12,479
No one isperfect. - I want
to beperfect forher. - Perfect?
1289
01:33:12,549 --> 01:33:15,643
About time you told Denise? - I
checked the file. - There's no future.
1290
01:33:15,719 --> 01:33:20,122
You will never learn to control him
till you accept the fact he is apart of you.
1291
01:33:33,604 --> 01:33:36,266
Sherman.
1292
01:33:37,408 --> 01:33:39,137
You okay?
1293
01:33:45,916 --> 01:33:50,512
Gone
he's all gone. Buddy? He evaporated?
1294
01:33:50,587 --> 01:33:54,353
Gone. And me no smart.
Never. No more.
1295
01:33:54,425 --> 01:33:57,360
Sherman, that's okay.
I mean, we'll figure something out.
1296
01:33:57,428 --> 01:34:00,192
There has to be something
that we can do.
1297
01:34:00,264 --> 01:34:02,698
I want to say
I'm- I'm sorry.
1298
01:34:04,268 --> 01:34:07,965
I never
I didn't want to hurt you. You understand?
1299
01:34:08,038 --> 01:34:12,236
I thought that if you knew
that Buddy was a part of me,
1300
01:34:12,309 --> 01:34:14,800
I thought that you
wouldn't have me then.
1301
01:34:14,878 --> 01:34:17,142
Sherman.
Now, hear me.
1302
01:34:17,214 --> 01:34:19,148
Hear me out now.
1303
01:34:20,717 --> 01:34:23,083
I should've had
more faith in you.
1304
01:34:24,488 --> 01:34:26,513
Should've had
more faith in myself.
1305
01:34:26,590 --> 01:34:29,218
But I-
Sherman.
1306
01:34:29,293 --> 01:34:33,320
Sherman, what's wrong?
Sherman?
1307
01:34:33,397 --> 01:34:35,865
Can't you hear, son?
Sherman, look at me.
1308
01:34:35,933 --> 01:34:38,265
Who am I?
1309
01:34:44,708 --> 01:34:47,268
Pretty lady.
Oh, honey.
1310
01:34:47,344 --> 01:34:49,278
Oh, that's nice.
1311
01:34:49,346 --> 01:34:54,010
It's gonna be okay.
Nice.
1312
01:34:54,084 --> 01:34:56,075
I'll take care of you.
1313
01:34:56,153 --> 01:34:58,747
Oh! Come on.
Let's get the boy home.
1314
01:34:59,990 --> 01:35:01,924
Nice lady.
1315
01:35:09,133 --> 01:35:11,931
Come on. Let'sget him home. Come on.
1316
01:35:12,002 --> 01:35:13,469
Go home now.
1317
01:35:13,537 --> 01:35:15,471
Thank you.
1318
01:35:21,044 --> 01:35:24,036
Oh, look at the-
the pretty water.
1319
01:35:27,050 --> 01:35:29,450
Oh, my God.
It's Buddy.
1320
01:35:29,520 --> 01:35:32,921
His DNA burst into water molecules. Sherman, quick.
What the hell?
1321
01:35:32,990 --> 01:35:35,083
Drink this.
No. Dirty water.
1322
01:35:35,159 --> 01:35:38,151
No. Come on, honey. You
have to drink this. Please.
1323
01:35:39,563 --> 01:35:42,293
Drink dirty water. Look
at me. What's my name?
1324
01:35:45,235 --> 01:35:48,830
Denise. You're Denise.
Oh, yes. Drink some more.
1325
01:35:48,906 --> 01:35:50,737
Denise. Come on.
Drink some more.
1326
01:35:50,807 --> 01:35:54,072
What's two times two?
Two times two is four.
1327
01:35:54,144 --> 01:35:57,238
Four times four? Four times four is fiif
sixteen.
1328
01:35:57,314 --> 01:36:00,249
Sherman, yes. Drink some
more before Buddy disperses.
1329
01:36:00,317 --> 01:36:03,309
Come on, boy.
1330
01:36:04,688 --> 01:36:06,849
What's your mama
middle name?
1331
01:36:06,924 --> 01:36:10,018
Oh, hell, no.
That ain't it.
1332
01:36:10,093 --> 01:36:12,618
Get a lot now.
Get a lot.
1333
01:36:12,696 --> 01:36:13,958
That's enough.
1334
01:36:14,031 --> 01:36:17,125
Pearl. He said Pearl! He said Pearl!
1335
01:36:17,201 --> 01:36:20,034
Anna Pearl. Sherman, what's
the square root of 2,000,602?
1336
01:36:20,103 --> 01:36:23,368
That's a hard one.
Four thousand,
1337
01:36:23,440 --> 01:36:26,500
414.426...
1338
01:36:26,577 --> 01:36:29,512
3855.
Oh, yes!
1339
01:36:31,515 --> 01:36:33,813
Oh, Sherman, yes!
1340
01:36:55,038 --> 01:36:58,701
Oh, fabulous! Oh!
1341
01:36:58,775 --> 01:37:02,006
Dynamite! Dynamite!
That's so lovely.
1342
01:37:02,079 --> 01:37:07,574
This go out to the new
Mr. and Ms. Sherman Klump.
1343
01:37:07,651 --> 01:37:10,119
Hear! Hear!
Come on, ya'll. Take it down.
1344
01:37:10,187 --> 01:37:13,020
A one
1345
01:37:13,090 --> 01:37:17,151
In a million
1346
01:37:17,227 --> 01:37:20,219
Chance
1347
01:37:20,297 --> 01:37:23,755
Of a lifetime
That sounds good.
1348
01:37:23,834 --> 01:37:25,267
And I
1349
01:37:25,335 --> 01:37:28,771
Whoo! Ernie, this
mine. This mine, Ernie.
1350
01:37:30,440 --> 01:37:32,772
Yes, indeed.
You surely are one in a million.
1351
01:37:32,843 --> 01:37:36,540
And I am finally
in charge, all right? All the way in charge.
1352
01:37:36,613 --> 01:37:39,912
Sherman Klump in charge.
1353
01:37:39,983 --> 01:37:43,714
You know I saved Sherman's life.
Clesius Klump, stop all that bragging.
1354
01:37:43,787 --> 01:37:47,723
Come on. Dance with me. Excuse us.
I'll get right back at ya.
1355
01:37:47,791 --> 01:37:50,521
Okay, you guys,
you ready?
1356
01:37:57,934 --> 01:38:00,596
You know what this means,
don't you?
1357
01:38:00,671 --> 01:38:03,902
Piece of happiness
to call my own.
1358
01:38:05,575 --> 01:38:10,239
And life's worth
living again
1359
01:38:10,314 --> 01:38:14,375
Anna Pearl, you are looking
foxy fii ne tonight. Oh!
1360
01:38:15,852 --> 01:38:18,412
Yeah, you got me feeling like I'm
20 years old again.
1361
01:38:18,488 --> 01:38:21,048
Oh, Cle- Ooh!
1362
01:38:21,124 --> 01:38:23,285
Ooh, Clesius,
is that your-
1363
01:38:23,360 --> 01:38:25,590
Mm-hmm.
You damn right.
1364
01:38:25,662 --> 01:38:30,463
Hercules, Hercules,
Hercules, Hercules!
1365
01:38:32,869 --> 01:38:34,996
One in a million
1366
01:38:35,072 --> 01:38:37,666
Million
Make that a billion
1367
01:38:37,741 --> 01:38:40,904
No, a trillion
Oh, a zillion
1368
01:38:40,977 --> 01:38:44,980
You, you
1369
01:38:45,048 --> 01:38:46,310
Oh
1370
01:38:46,383 --> 01:38:49,682
Oh, Lord, Lord
1371
01:38:49,753 --> 01:38:53,519
You, you, you
1372
01:38:56,493 --> 01:38:58,757
I love you, Joe College!
1373
01:39:06,436 --> 01:39:10,031
Hey, hey
hey, hey, hey
1374
01:39:10,107 --> 01:39:14,100
Macho, macho man
Macho man, yeah
1375
01:39:14,177 --> 01:39:17,340
I've got to be
a macho man
1376
01:39:17,414 --> 01:39:21,009
Macho, macho man, yeah
1377
01:39:21,084 --> 01:39:23,712
Klump?
1378
01:39:23,787 --> 01:39:27,279
Aw, shit. The prop's
falling apart.
1379
01:39:27,357 --> 01:39:29,757
You get the heart pumping
with the red wine.
1380
01:39:29,826 --> 01:39:31,760
The better
the circulation.
1381
01:39:31,828 --> 01:39:36,060
Pumping heart, red wine. One and
one is two. Powerful erection.
1382
01:39:36,133 --> 01:39:38,067
Powerful erection!
1383
01:39:38,135 --> 01:39:40,069
Oh!
1384
01:39:40,137 --> 01:39:42,071
Clesius!
1385
01:39:47,644 --> 01:39:49,578
You bitches
done ruined everthing.
1386
01:39:49,646 --> 01:39:52,046
I just told you, bitch!
I'm gonna kick your ass now!
1387
01:39:52,115 --> 01:39:54,515
I'm logging you too.
1388
01:40:00,090 --> 01:40:03,548
What have I done? What have I
done? What have I done, O Lord?
1389
01:40:07,097 --> 01:40:09,930
Hurry, Clesius.
Hurry. Hurry, Clesius.
1390
01:40:10,000 --> 01:40:12,935
Oh, Clesius.
Lord, hurry.
1391
01:40:13,003 --> 01:40:16,734
Clesius, my "ariolas"
is gonna pop.
1392
01:40:16,807 --> 01:40:19,435
See you tomorrow.
See you tomorrow.
1393
01:40:30,854 --> 01:40:35,018
Oh, happy day
Oh, happy day, happy day
1394
01:40:35,091 --> 01:40:36,817
Oh, happy day
Happy day
1395
01:40:38,452 --> 01:40:41,615
Doesn't matter what
your friends are telling you
1396
01:40:41,689 --> 01:40:44,021
Doesn't matter what
my family's saying too
1397
01:40:44,091 --> 01:40:46,355
It just matters
that I'm in love with you
1398
01:40:46,427 --> 01:40:48,861
It only matters
that you love me too
1399
01:40:48,929 --> 01:40:51,193
It doesn't matter
if they won't accept you
1400
01:40:51,265 --> 01:40:53,756
I'm accepting of you
and the things you do
1401
01:40:53,834 --> 01:40:56,132
Just as long as it's you
1402
01:40:56,203 --> 01:40:59,502
Nobody but you
baby, baby
1403
01:40:59,573 --> 01:41:01,871
My love for you
1404
01:41:01,942 --> 01:41:04,137
Unconditional love too
1405
01:41:04,211 --> 01:41:09,012
Gotta get up, get up get up, get
up, get up and show you that it
1406
01:41:09,083 --> 01:41:11,244
Doesn't really matter
what the eye is seeing
1407
01:41:11,318 --> 01:41:13,684
'Cause I'm in love
with the inner being
1408
01:41:13,754 --> 01:41:16,222
No, it doesn't really
matter what they believe
1409
01:41:16,290 --> 01:41:18,724
What matters to me is that
you're in love with me
1410
01:41:18,792 --> 01:41:20,919
Doesn't really matter
what the eye is seeing
1411
01:41:20,995 --> 01:41:23,327
'Cause I'm love
with the inner being
1412
01:41:23,397 --> 01:41:25,888
No, it doesn't really matter
what they believe
1413
01:41:25,966 --> 01:41:28,594
What matters to me is you're
nutty, nutty, nutty for me
1414
01:41:28,669 --> 01:41:30,603
You're so kind
1415
01:41:30,671 --> 01:41:33,231
Just what I asked for
You're so loving and kind
1416
01:41:33,307 --> 01:41:35,241
And you're mine
1417
01:41:35,309 --> 01:41:39,837
And I can't believe
you're mine
1418
01:41:39,913 --> 01:41:43,246
Doesn't matter if you're feeling insecure
1419
01:41:43,317 --> 01:41:45,615
Doesn't matter
if you're feeling so unsure
1420
01:41:45,686 --> 01:41:47,916
'Cause I'll take away
the doubt with in your heart
1421
01:41:47,988 --> 01:41:50,513
And show that my love
will never hurt or harm
1422
01:41:50,591 --> 01:41:52,889
Doesn't matter
what the pain we go through
1423
01:41:52,960 --> 01:41:55,258
Doesn't matter
if the money's gone too
1424
01:41:55,329 --> 01:41:57,854
Just as long
as l'm with you
1425
01:41:57,931 --> 01:42:01,230
Nobody but you
baby, baby
1426
01:42:01,301 --> 01:42:03,701
Your love for me
1427
01:42:03,771 --> 01:42:05,739
Unconditional I see
1428
01:42:05,806 --> 01:42:10,800
Gotta get up, get up get up,
get up, get up and show you that it
1429
01:42:27,828 --> 01:42:29,921
Doesn't really matter
what the eye is seeing
1430
01:42:29,997 --> 01:42:32,329
'Cause I'm in love
with the inner being
1431
01:42:32,399 --> 01:42:34,799
No, it doesn't really
matter what they believe
1432
01:42:34,868 --> 01:42:37,302
What matters to me
is you're in love with me
1433
01:42:37,371 --> 01:42:39,635
Doesn't really matter
what the eye is seeing
1434
01:42:39,706 --> 01:42:41,936
'Cause I'm in love
with the innerbeing
1435
01:42:42,009 --> 01:42:44,500
No, it doesn't really
matter what they believe
1436
01:42:44,578 --> 01:42:47,172
What matters to me is you're
nutty, nutty, nutty for me
1437
01:42:47,247 --> 01:42:49,306
Doesn't really matter
what the eye is seeing
1438
01:42:49,383 --> 01:42:51,613
'Cause I'm in love
with the innerbeing
1439
01:42:51,685 --> 01:42:54,017
No, it doesn't really
matter what they believe
1440
01:42:54,088 --> 01:42:56,886
What matters to me
is you're in love with me
1441
01:42:56,957 --> 01:42:58,925
Doesn't really matter
what the eye is seeing
1442
01:42:58,992 --> 01:43:01,460
'Cause I'm in love
with the inner being
1443
01:43:01,528 --> 01:43:03,758
No, it doesn't really
matter what they believe
1444
01:43:03,831 --> 01:43:06,561
What matters to me is you're
nutty, nutty, nutty for me
1445
01:43:06,633 --> 01:43:08,533
You're so kind
1446
01:43:08,602 --> 01:43:11,503
Oh, just what I asked for
You're so loving and kind
1447
01:43:11,572 --> 01:43:13,369
And you're mine
1448
01:43:13,440 --> 01:43:17,809
And I can't believe
you're mine
1449
01:43:17,878 --> 01:43:22,440
Doesn't matter
what they say
1450
01:43:22,516 --> 01:43:27,579
Because you know
I'm gonna love you anyway
1451
01:43:27,654 --> 01:43:32,353
Doesn't matter
what they do
1452
01:43:32,426 --> 01:43:39,423
'Cause my love
will always be with you
1453
01:43:39,500 --> 01:43:41,627
My love for you
1454
01:43:41,702 --> 01:43:43,693
Unconditional love too
1455
01:43:43,770 --> 01:43:46,238
Gotta get up, get up
get up, get up, get up
1456
01:43:46,306 --> 01:43:50,572
And show you
that my love is true
1457
01:43:50,644 --> 01:43:55,411
And it's just for you
1458
01:43:55,482 --> 01:43:57,712
Doesn't really matter
what the eye is seeing
1459
01:43:57,784 --> 01:44:00,082
'Cause I'm in love
with the inner being
1460
01:44:00,154 --> 01:44:02,520
No, it doesn't really
matter what they believe
1461
01:44:02,589 --> 01:44:04,955
What matters to me
is you're in love with me
1462
01:44:05,025 --> 01:44:07,323
Doesn't really matter
what the eye is seeing
1463
01:44:07,394 --> 01:44:09,760
'Cause I'm in love
with the inner being
1464
01:44:09,830 --> 01:44:12,025
No, it doesn't really
matter what they believe
1465
01:44:12,099 --> 01:44:14,932
What matters to me is you're
nutty, nutty, nutty for me
1466
01:44:15,002 --> 01:44:16,936
Nutty, nutty, nutty
my love for you
1467
01:44:17,004 --> 01:44:19,438
I can't believe
my dreams come true
1468
01:44:19,506 --> 01:44:21,770
I've finally found some body
whose heart is true
1469
01:44:21,842 --> 01:44:24,402
And best of all
you love me too
1470
01:44:24,478 --> 01:44:26,673
And nutty, nutty, nutty
my love for you
1471
01:44:26,747 --> 01:44:29,113
I can't believe
my dreams come true
1472
01:44:29,183 --> 01:44:31,481
I've finally found somebody
whose heart is true
1473
01:44:31,552 --> 01:44:34,214
And best of all is you're nutty, nutty, nutty for me
Sing
1474
01:44:34,288 --> 01:44:35,949
Whoa, whoa
1475
01:44:36,023 --> 01:44:38,514
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
1476
01:44:38,592 --> 01:44:43,859
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
1477
01:44:43,931 --> 01:44:45,990
Nutty, nutty, nutty
my love for you
1478
01:44:46,066 --> 01:44:49,399
I can't believe
my dreams come true
1479
01:44:49,469 --> 01:44:50,834
I've finally found someone
whose heart is true
1480
01:44:50,904 --> 01:44:53,634
And best of all isyou're
nutty, nutty, nutty for me
1481
01:44:53,707 --> 01:44:55,971
Nutty, nutty, nutty my love for you
I'm always doing that.
1482
01:44:56,043 --> 01:44:58,102
I can't believe
my dreams come true
1483
01:44:58,178 --> 01:45:00,442
I've finally found somebody
whose heart is true
1484
01:45:00,514 --> 01:45:03,847
And best of all is you're
nutty, nutty, nutty for me
126756
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