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>> OKAY, OKAY, MAN. SHH, SHH!
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COME ON, BABY.
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HOW MUCH BASE DO YOU NEED?
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>> MAN, I'M GIVING YOU $2,
A CHEESEBURGER WITH NO CHEESE ON
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IT, AND CONJOINED CAMBODIAN TWINS.
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THAT'S GOT TO BE WORTH MORE BASE THAN THAT.
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[ SIREN WAILS ] >> SHIT! THE COPS!
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>> WAIT! WHAT ABOUT MY BASE?!
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POLICE! STOP HIM!
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HE STOLE MY BASE!
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[ SIRENS WAILING ] [ TIRES SCREECH ]
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[ TIRES SCREECH ] >> COME ON, LAMONT.
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GIVE IT UP. IT'S OVER.
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>> WE GOT YOU FOR DRUGS,
AND WE GOT YOU FOR MURDER.
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>> M-M-MURDER?
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WHAT - WHAT MURDER?
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>> [ Chuckling ] THE ONE
YOU'RE BEING FRAMED FOR WITH THIS
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BULLSHIT EVIDENCE WE'RE GONNA PLANT.
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[ LAUGHS CRUELLY ] >>
[ Voice breaking ] I CAN'T DO
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LIFE.
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LIFE IS WHAT KILLED MY FATHER.
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BESIDES, I CAN'T GET MY NEW SUEDE PUMAS WET.
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DAMN, LIFE OR WET PUMAS?
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WHAT A FUCKED UP DAY THIS HAS TURNED OUT TO BE.
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[ GUNS COCK ] NAH, FUCK IT. BYE, BITCH.
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[ BABY CRIES ] AAAAAHH!
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[ WATER SLOSHES ] >> WELL, DID HE FLY?
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BECAUSE THERE'S NO WAY
IN HELL HE JUMPED IN THE WATER!
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HE'S BLACK!
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>> [ LAUGHS ] NICE TRY, PIGS!
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DIDN'T THINK A BLACK MAN COULD SWIM, DID YOU?
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00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:07,999
[ THUD ] AAH!
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00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,999
[ "JAWS" THEME PLAYS ] [ GRUNTS ]
34
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HELP! COME IN HERE AND GET ME!
35
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PLEASE COME GET ME! HELP!
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I'D RATHER GO TO JAIL!
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[ SCREAMING ] MY GUTS!
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[ SCREAMS ] [ MUSIC INTENSIFIES ]
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[ SHARK ROARING ] >> HOLD ON TO YOUR BLACK BALLS!
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IT'S BLACK JAWS!
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>> ♪ DYNAMITE! DYNAMITE! >> ♪ HE'S DYNAMITE
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♪ SO DYNAMITE ♪ OOOHHH, OOOHHH
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♪ OOOHHH ♪ AHHHH
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♪ HE'S DYNAMITE ♪ DY-NO, DY-NO
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♪ OOOHHH, OOOHHH ♪ OOOOHHHH
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♪ DYNAMITE! DYNAMITE! >> THIS WEEK...
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[ VIDEO GAME MUSIC PLAYS,
MONITOR BEEPING, BUZZING ]
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[ DOOR OPENS ] >> [ ROARS ]
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[ SOUR NOTES PLAY ] DAMN IT, KISSINGER!
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THE BLACK SPADE INVADERS GOT ME!
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>> [ Monotone ] SORRY, NIX.
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>> WHAT DO YOU WANT, ANYWAY?
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>> IT'S TIME FOR YOUR DAILY BLACK BRIEFING, DICK.
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>> GIVE IT TO ME, KISS.
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AND REMEMBER, BAD BLACK NEWS IS GOOD WHITE NEWS.
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>> LET ME JUST FIRE UP THE OLD R.A.C.I.S.T.
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[ POWERING UP ] WE JUST CONFIRMED THAT THE
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AGENT ORANGE KOOL-AID WE SELL
IN THE BLACK COMMUNITY DOES, IN
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FACT, CAUSE CANCER.
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>> WAIT.
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WHY ARE YOU CONFIRMING THAT
THE THING WE CREATED TO CAUSE CANCER
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CAUSES CANCER?
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>> MY BAD.
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WHAT ELSE DO WE HAVE HERE?
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>> THE SELF-HATING JHERI-
CURL ACTIVATOR WE CREATED IS NOT
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CATCHING ON.
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00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:55,999
WE SHOULD PUT THIS ONE ON
AN ICE CUBE UNTIL WE FIND THE
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00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:59,999
RIGHT NIGGAS WITH ATTITUDES TO MAKE IT POPULAR.
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00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:00,999
>> BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. NEXT.
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00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,999
>> NOTHING ELSE TOO INTERESTING.
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00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:05,820
>> THERE ARE SPORADIC REPORTS
OF SHARK ATTACKS ON BLACKS.
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00:03:05,821 --> 00:03:07,999
TO INCREASE BLOOD PRESSURE
IN THE BLACK COMMUNITY, WE ARE
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00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:09,999
ADDING SODIUM TO SPORTS CLOTHING.
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WE ARE GOING TO BUY THE NBA.
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00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:12,999
>> STOP THE PICKANINNY PRESSES.
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TELL ME MORE ABOUT THAT DARKY SHARKY SHIT.
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>> FIRST, A ROUTINE NEGRO
FRAME-UP WAS INTERRUPTED BY A
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SHARK ATTACK.
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LATER, AN INTERRACIAL COUPLE
WAS ATTACKED, BUT THE SHARK DID
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NOT EAT THE WHITE GIRL.
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IN FACT, THE SHARK EVEN GAVE HER A RIDE HOME.
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>> WHERE'S THAT SOUL-FOOD-PEOPLE-EATING SHARK
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NOW?
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>> THE SHARK WILL MOST LIKELY
FOLLOW A PATH DOWN THE COAST.
85
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>> FANTASTIC.
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NOW WE NEED A WAY TO GET THE
ENTIRE NEGRO POPULATION IN THE
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WATER AT ONCE.
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KISS, WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN
YOU MIX MUSIC, FOOD, FANCY CARS,
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MOTORCYCLES, ASS, AND
NEGROES TOGETHER WITH WATER?
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>> I DON'T KNOW. GOOD TIMES?
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>> BLACK BEACH WEEK!
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GET THE MAYOR OF THAT PODUNK
SHIT BEACH TOWN ON THE PHONE
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AND HAVE HIM THROW THE BIGGEST,
FUNKIEST, BLACKEST PARTY THE
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BEACH HAS EVER SEEN.
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WE'LL CALL IT "OPERATION BLAQUA PARTY."
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00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:09,000
>> ♪ DYNAMITE! DYNAMITE
>> Honey Bee: UNH-UNH-UNH!
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I GOT MY GOLD "FUCK 'EM GIRL" BATHING SUIT ON, MY
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MATCHING CORNROWS, GOT THE TITTIES PERCOLATIN'.
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HA HA!
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I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HOW MANY
SUCKAS I CAN TURN DOWN AT THIS
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BLAQUA PARTY.
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>> Cream Corn: HA!
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YOU THINK SOMEBODY GONNA TALK TO YOU, C-3PO?
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WELL, MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU, GIRL.
105
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>> Honey Bee: I'M-A FORCE
MY FOOT UP YOUR ASS, LOOKIN' LIKE A
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BLACK MICHELIN MAN.
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>> Cream Corn: HEY, AND I'LL
BE DAMNED IF I'M-A GET MY BEAUTIFUL
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HAIR WET, 'CAUSE IF I DO
GET MY DO WET, IT WON'T LOOK WET
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ANYMORE.
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>> Bullhorn: [ GROANS ] >> Honey Bee: DAMN!
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BULLHORN, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
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>> Bullhorn: I BEEN FASTING
MY ASS OFF FOR THREE DAYS PREPARING
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FOR THIS SOUL FOOD EATIN' CONTEST.
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I'VE GOT TO BE THE HUNGRIEST
MOTHERFUCKA IN ALL OF
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LOS ANGELES!
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>> Cream Corn: WELL, IT'S
TOO BAD YOU'RE GONNA LOSE.
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YOU KNOW THICK JAMES GONNA BE THERE.
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HE DONE WON EVERY SOUL FOOD EATIN' CONTEST THIS
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COMMUNITY EVER HAD.
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>> Bullhorn: MAN FUCK THICK JAMES.
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I CAN EAT 10 WHALES WITH A
SIDE OF BUFFALO AND THEIR WINGS!
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IT'S BULLHORN THAT'LL BE THE NEW SOUL-FOOD KING.
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THAT IS...
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[ STOMACH CHURNS ] ...IF I COULD MAKE IT TO THIS
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DAMN THING.
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>> Cream Corn: BLACK DYNAMITE,
I KNOW YOU'RE NOT WEARING YOUR
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EVERYDAY ASS-KICKING CLOTHES TO THE BEACH.
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YOU GONNA LOOK RIDICULOUS
IF YOU DON'T LOOK RIDICULOUS.
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00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,999
>> Black Dynamite: IT'S
ONLY A BEACH, CREAM CORN - JUST A
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00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,999
BIG-ASS BATHTUB WITH FISH IN IT.
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AND IF YOU'VE SEEN ONE BIG-
ASS BATHTUB WITH FISH IN IT, YOU'VE
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SEEN 'EM ALL.
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BESIDES, BEACHES ARE FOR BITCHES.
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>> Honey Bee: I KNOW THAT'S
RIGHT, AND THIS BITCH IS ABOUT
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TO BE THE SEXIEST BITCH ON THE BEACH.
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I'M TELLING YOU, WHEN I HIT
THE SAND, THERE WON'T BE A SOFT
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DICK IN SIGHT!
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[ CHUCKLES ] EXCEPT FOR Y'ALL'S, OF COURSE,
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'CAUSE, YOU KNOW, THAT WOULD BE JUST WEIRD.
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UGH!
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>> ♪ DYNAMITE! DYNAMITE >> HEY, Y'ALL.
LET'S DO THIS.
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[ INDISTINCT CHATTER ] >> IN YOUR FACE!
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[ CHATTER CONTINUES ] >> OH, YEAH.
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>> LET'S GO GET SOME!
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[ FEEDBACK ] >> "WELCOME, DARKNESS-"
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DARKNESSES? HMM.
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"WELCOME TO THE FIRST ANNUAL BLAQUA PARTY.
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PLEASE, BLACK CRAYOLA CRICKETS..."
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>> CRAYOLA?
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>> "...STAY IN THE WATER FOR
AS LONG AS YOU CAN, AND NO MATTER
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WHAT HAPPENS, DO NOT GET OUT."
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[ PARTYGOERS MURMURING ] >> Black Dynamite: HMM.
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THERE'S SOMETHING FISHY ABOUT
THIS BEACH PARTY, AND IT AIN'T
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THE FISH.
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>> LOOK, THEY GOT MERRY HOS
ON THE MERRY-HO-ROUND IN THE WATER!
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COME ON! LET'S GO!
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00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:03,999
[ CHILDREN CHEERING, LAUGHING
] [ OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYS, CHILDREN
158
00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:05,980
LAUGHING ] >> Bullhorn: BEFORE I CAN WIN
159
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:14,999
THIS CONTEST OF SWININ' AND
DININ', SOMEBODY NEEDS TO CARRY
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00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:18,000
MY BLACK ASS TO THE SIGN-
IN BOOTH SO MY BLACK ASS CAN SIGN
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IN.
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[ ALL GASP ] LOOK! UP IN THE SKY!
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IT'S A TURD! IT'S A TRAIN!
164
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>> IT'S THICK JAMES, BITCH!
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00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:29,999
[ CROWD CHEERING, FUNKY MUSIC PLAYS ]
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>> OH!
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[ LAUGHS ] [ WHISTLE! ]
168
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[ ALL CHEER ] >> THICK JAMES!
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EAT ME LIKE A PIECE OF CORNBREAD.
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00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:39,999
[ SLURP! SLURP! ] >> [ Deep voice ] I'M
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THICK JAMES, BITCH.
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ENJOY YOURSELVES.
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[ LAUGHS ] [ CROWD CHANTING "THICK JAMES" ]
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[ STOMACH CHURNS ] >> Bullhorn: [ GROANS ]
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00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,999
[ WOMEN LAUGHING ] >>
Cream Corn: HEY, COME ON IN,
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BLACK DYNAMITE.
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IT'S SO MUCH FUN.
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00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:51,999
BRING THEM BEACH BALLS OVER HERE, GIRL.
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00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:52,999
STOP PLAYIN'.
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00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:53,999
>> Black Dynamite: NOT NOW, CREAM CORN.
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00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:55,999
CAN'T YOU SEE I'M TRYING
TO BUILD A SAND WHOREPHANAGE?
182
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>> Cream Corn: OKAY, BLACK
DYNAMITE, SUIT YOURSELF.
183
00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:58,999
YOUR LOSS.
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00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:04,999
[ OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYS ]
MAN, IF THEY HAD BLAQUA PARTIES
185
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,999
LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME, MY
BLACK ASS WOULD LIVE IN THE SEA!
186
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:08,999
>> Honey Bee: I'M SURE YOU WOULD, BLAQUA MAN.
187
00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:09,999
>> Cream Corn: HEY!
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00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:10,999
BLACK DYNAMITE!
189
00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:11,999
YOU SAID BEACHES WAS FOR
BITCHES - YOU BETTER COME GET
190
00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:13,999
SOME OF THESE BITCHES WHILE THEY STILL WET.
191
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:15,999
>> Black Dynamite: BLACK DYNAMITE DON'T COME TO
192
00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:16,999
BITCHES - BITCHES COME TO BLACK DYNAMITE.
193
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:18,999
NOW, WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT
THE FUCK UP WHILE GROWN FOLKS IS
194
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:19,999
BUILDING A SAND WHOREPHANAGE?
195
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,999
>> Cream Corn: SORRY, BLACK DYNAMITE.
196
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:22,999
MORE WET BITCH FOR ME.
197
00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:23,999
>> Honey Bee: DAMN.
198
00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:25,999
I HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE TO TURN DOWN ONE MAN YET!
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00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:27,999
OH, I'M - I'M-A DO A SEXY RUN DOWN THE BEACH.
200
00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:28,999
THAT ALWAYS GETS 'EM.
201
00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,999
[ ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS ] [ ALL GASP ]
202
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:32,999
>> OH, MAN!
203
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:36,999
>> [ GASPS ] [ ALL GASP ]
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[ BOING! ] >> MM-MMM! DAMN!
205
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:40,999
I AIN'T NEVER SEEN A WHITE
GIRL WITH CORNROWS BEFORE.
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00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:41,999
OH, MAN! THAT BITCH BAD!
207
00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:43,999
IT'S SOMETHING ABOUT THE NOVELTY OF IT.
208
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:44,999
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?
209
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:46,999
IT'S LIKE SEEING A BIGFOOT IN THIS MOTHER.
210
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:48,999
>> HEY, THERE, WHITE BITCH, WHERE YOU GOIN'?
211
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:50,999
>> BLACK DYNAMITE, CAN YOU TEACH ME HOW TO SURF?
212
00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:52,999
>> Black Dynamite: DAMN IT, LITTLE ORPHAN PENNY.
213
00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:53,999
YOU MADE ME FUCK UP THE SIGN.
214
00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:57,000
AND JUST FOR THAT, YOU GOT
TO TEACH YOUR OWN SELF HOW TO SURF.
215
00:07:57,001 --> 00:07:59,999
>> [ CHUCKLES MOCKINGLY
] [ Singsong voice ] MINE LOOKS
216
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:00,999
WAY BETTER THAN YOURS!
217
00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:01,999
>> Black Dynamite: A FUCKING CASTLE.
218
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:03,999
HOW ORIGINAL.
219
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,999
>> NIGGA THAT AIN'T GONNA STICK WITHOUT NO WATER.
220
00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:07,999
HERE.
221
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:10,000
[ "JAWS" THEME PLAYS ] [ MUSIC STOPS ]
222
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:15,999
[ "JAWS" THEME PLAYS ] >> HEY, MY TOWEL!
223
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:16,999
>> I GOT A TOWEL.
224
00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:17,999
>> YO, WHAT'S UP, GIRL?
225
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:18,999
RIGHT ON.
226
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:19,999
>> Black Dynamite: CREAM CORN!
227
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:20,999
SHARK! SHARK!
228
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:21,999
GET OUT THE WATER!
229
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:25,999
[ ALL SCREAMING ] CREAM CORN, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
230
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:28,999
>> Cream Corn: [ LAUGHS ] STOP! THAT TICKLES!
231
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:29,999
THAT TICKLES!
232
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:30,999
YOU GOIN' MAKE PEE ON MYSELF - AGAIN!
233
00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:33,999
>> [ LAUGHS ] >> [ LAUGHS MOCKINGLY ]
234
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:34,999
YOU THOUGHT IT WAS A REAL SHARK.
235
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:35,999
YOU STUPID.
236
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,999
[ LAUGHS ] >> Black Dynamite: SUEY!
237
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,999
THERE. NOW WE EVEN.
238
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:42,999
>> [ SOBBING ] [ ALL CHEERING ]
239
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:45,999
>> Bullhorn: BRING ON THE
CHITLINS, COLLARD GREENS, AND
240
00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:46,999
HAM-HOCK MEAT.
241
00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:48,999
LET'S GET THIS MOTHERFUCKER STARTED.
242
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:49,999
I'M READY TO EAT.
243
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:50,999
>> EVERYONE, TAKE YOUR SEATS.
244
00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:52,999
WE'RE ABOUT TO BEGIN THE SOUL FOOD -
245
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:53,999
>> FUCK YOUR SPEECH, NIGGA.
246
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:55,050
FUCK YOUR SPEECH.
247
00:08:55,051 --> 00:08:57,999
[ WOOD CREAKS ] LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED.
248
00:08:58,000 --> 00:08:59,999
[ LAUGHS ] I'M THICK JAMES, BITCH.
249
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:03,999
[ LAUGHS ] [ WISTFUL MUSIC PLAYS ]
250
00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:04,999
>> ON YOUR MARCH...
251
00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:05,999
>> WE'RE ON, NIGGA.
252
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:07,999
[ MUSIC STOPS, GUNSHOT ]
[ CONTESTANTS MUNCHING RAPIDLY,
253
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:10,000
CROWD CHEERING ] >> MMM! MM-MMM!
254
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:17,999
>> I'M THICK JAMES, BITCH.
255
00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:19,999
TOO BAD YOU SLOW MOTHERFUCKERS
GOT TO CHEW YOUR FOOD.
256
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:22,999
[ LAUGHS ] I'M THICK JAMES, BITCH.
257
00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:25,999
[ CROWD CHANTING "THICK
JAMES" ] [ BURPS MONSTROUSLY ]
258
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:26,999
[ PARTYGOERS GAGGING ] >> OH! MY MOUTH WAS OPEN!
259
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,999
>> FOOD IS A HELL OF A DRUG.
260
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,999
>> AND THE WINNER IS THICK JAMES.
261
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:32,999
[ CROWD CHEERING ] >> [ CHUCKLES ]
262
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:34,999
THICK JAMES IS TRULY TOUCHED BY YOUR KINDNESS.
263
00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:36,999
FIRST, THOUGH, I'D LIKE TO THANK
MY LORD AND SAVIOR FOR BLESSING
264
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,999
ME WITH SUCH A WIDE THROAT,
MAKING ME GREEDY ENOUGH TO
265
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,999
SWALLOW SUCH QUANTITIES OF FOOD AT ONE TIME.
266
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:44,999
[ GAGGING ] [ PARTYGOERS GASP ]
267
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:47,000
[ CONTINUES GAGGING ] [ FEEDBACK ]
268
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,999
>> AND THE NEW WINNER IS, UH, BULLHORN!
269
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:54,999
[ CROWD CHEERING ] AND
NOW TO PRESENT THE TROPHY TO
270
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:58,999
THE NEW CHAMP, THE SEXIEST
AND ONLY WHITE WOMAN ON THE BEACH,
271
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,999
INTERNATIONAL MOVIE STAR BO DEREK.
272
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:01,999
[ CROWD CHEERING ] >> HA HA!
273
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:02,999
THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT!
274
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:05,710
[ CROWD CHANTING "WHITE
BITCH" ] COME ON, WHITE GIRL!
275
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:11,999
[ CHANTING CONTINUES ] [ "JAWS" THEME PLAYS ]
276
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:13,999
>> Black Dynamite: MAN.
277
00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:15,999
ALL THIS HAVING FUN AND
HAPPINESS WITH NOTHING GOING
278
00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:18,999
WRONG, IT'S LIKE THERE'S
NO REASON FOR BLACK DYNAMITE TO
279
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:19,999
EVEN BE HERE.
280
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:20,999
>> OOH! LOOK, BLACK DYNAMITE!
281
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:22,999
I'M SURFING ALL BY MYSELF!
282
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,999
>> Black Dynamite: STOP PLAYING
WITH THAT FUCKIN' FAKE SHARK
283
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:26,999
FIN, LITTLE ORPHAN ARNOLD.
284
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:27,999
IT'S NOT FUNNY.
285
00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:28,999
>> OKAY, BLACK DYNAMITE.
286
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:29,999
[ "JAWS" THEME PLAYS ] >> Black Dynamite: SURF,
287
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:30,999
LITTLE ORPHAN PENNY!
288
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:32,999
SURF LIKE I NEVER TAUGHT YOU HOW TO SURF BEFORE!
289
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,999
[ SHARK ROARING ] NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
290
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:40,000
>> ♪ DYNAMITE! DYNAMITE!
291
00:10:40,001 --> 00:10:43,999
[ SHARK ROARING, ALL SCREAMING
] >> Cream Corn: BLACK DYNAMITE!
292
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,999
SAVE MY ASS! THERE'S A SHARK!
293
00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:49,999
[ SCREAMING CONTINUES ] [ SHARK ROARING ]
294
00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:50,999
>> OH, MY GOD!
295
00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:51,999
>> Black Dynamite: ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
296
00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:54,999
>> [ Weakly ] BLACK DYNAMITE, YOU AIN'T SHIT
297
00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:55,999
>> BLACK DYNAMITE!
298
00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:58,999
[ SCREAMING CONTINUES
] >> Black Dynamite: LIFEGUARD!
299
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,999
OUT THERE IN THE WATER, THERE'S A...
300
00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:03,999
>> AAH! GET OUT OF THE WATER!
301
00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:04,999
>> COME ON, MAN.
302
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:05,999
HELP HIM, BLACK DYNAMITE.
303
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:07,999
>> DO SOMETHING, BLACK DYNAMITE!
304
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,999
[ SCREAMING CONTINUES
] >> GOD DAMN, THAT WAS YOUR
305
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:11,999
DADDY!
306
00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:12,999
>> Cream Corn: OH, DAMN!
307
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,999
>> WHY THE HELL YOU AIN'T
HELPING, BLACK DYNAMITE?
308
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:17,999
>> Black Dynamite: BECAUSE I CAN'T SWIM, DAMN IT!
309
00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:18,999
ARE YOU HAPPY NOW? I SAID IT.
310
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,000
BLACK DYNAMITE CAN'T FUCKIN' SWIM.
311
00:11:21,001 --> 00:11:22,999
>> [ GASPS ] >> WHAT?
312
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:24,999
>> Black Dynamite: AND WHEN
THE FUCK DID Y'ALL LEARN HOW TO
313
00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:25,999
SWIM, ANYWAY?
314
00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:26,999
Y'ALL BEEN TAKING LESSONS BEHIND MY BACK?
315
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:27,999
>> Cream Corn: WAIT.
316
00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:29,980
BUT DIDN'T YOU SWIM AFTER ME IN VIETNAM?
317
00:11:29,981 --> 00:11:31,999
>> Black Dynamite: THAT WAS
LAST SEASON, AND BESIDES, I WAS
318
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:33,999
SUFFERING FROM POSTTRAUMATIC FLASHBACK DISORDER.
319
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,999
[ PARTYGOERS MURMURING
] >> I'M SORRY FOR SAYING YOU
320
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:36,999
WEREN'T SHIT BLACK DYNAMITE.
321
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,999
I KNOW YOU WEREN'T GONNA LET THAT SHARK EAT ME.
322
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,999
MWAH!
323
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,999
>> Black Dynamite: THANK
YOU, LITTLE ORPHAN PENNY, BUT THE
324
00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:44,999
TRUTH IS, BLACK DYNAMITE
WAS GONNA LET THAT SHARK EAT THE
325
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,999
HELL OUT YOU BEFORE HE
WOULD'VE GOT IN THAT WATER.
326
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:47,999
>> [ GASPS ] >> IF HE WERE DYNAMITE, HE'D BE
327
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,999
ABLE TO SWIM.
328
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,999
>> Bullhorn: YOU WERE IN THE
CIA, AND YOU WAS A NAVY S.E.A.L.
329
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:53,999
TALKIN' 'BOUT YOU CAN'T SWIM?
330
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:54,999
MAN, ARE YOU FOR REAL?
331
00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:56,999
>> Honey Bee: YEAH, BLACK DYNAMITE.
332
00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:57,999
HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?
333
00:11:58,000 --> 00:11:58,999
>> Black Dynamite: SOMEHOW I'VE
JUST ALWAYS FOUND A WAY TO AVOID
334
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:00,999
SWIMMING.
335
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:01,999
>> Cream Corn: BUT WHAT ABOUT
THAT BUBBLE BATH YOU TOOK WITH
336
00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:03,999
THE SUPREMES OR THAT TIME
YOU WAS IN THE SHOWER WITH
337
00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:05,999
DIANA ROSS, DONNA SUMMER, AND CHAKA KHAN?
338
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:07,999
>> Black Dynamite: I'M NOT
AFRAID OF WATER, JUST SWIMMING,
339
00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:08,999
DAMN IT!
340
00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:09,999
NOW, IF YOU SHUT THE FUCK
UP WHEN I'M TRYING TO GIVE YOU A
341
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:10,999
FLASHBACK, I CAN GIVE YOU ONE.
342
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,999
>> Cream Corn: SORRY, BLACK DYNAMITE.
343
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,999
GO AHEAD AND FLASH BACK.
344
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:15,999
>> OH, MY GOD!
345
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:16,999
>> OH, BLACK DYNAMITE!
346
00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:18,999
PLEASE SWIM OUT THERE AND SAVE OUR KIDS.
347
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:21,400
[ INDISTINCT CHATTER ] >> Black Dynamite: I WAS A
348
00:12:21,401 --> 00:12:25,999
STATICKY MOTHERFUCKA FOR
WEEKS, BUT AT LEAST I DIDN'T
349
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:26,999
HAVE TO SWIM.
350
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:28,999
[ INDISTINCT CHATTER ] >> [ MOANING ]
351
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:29,999
>> OH, WE LOVE YOU, BLACK DYNAMITE.
352
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:30,999
THANK YOU.
353
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:31,999
>> OKAY, GUYS.
354
00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:33,999
DR. WU'S UNDERWATER BASE IS DIRECTLY BELOW US.
355
00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:35,999
LET'S SWIM DOWN THERE, INFILTRATE VIA THE DOCKING
356
00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:36,999
PORTS, AND...
357
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:36,999
BLACK DYNAMITE.
358
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,999
[ GUN COCKS ] BLACK DYNAMITE!
359
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:39,999
>> WAIT, WAIT! WAIT, WAIT!
360
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:40,999
[ ALL SCREAM ] >> DAMN IT!
361
00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:42,999
>> Black Dynamite: IN SOME
CASES, IT WOULD'VE ACTUALLY
362
00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:45,999
BEEN EASIER JUST TO SWIM,
BUT I MANAGED TO FIND A HARDER WAY
363
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:46,999
NOT TO.
364
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:47,999
>> BLACK DYNAMITE!
365
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:48,999
I SEE YOU STANDING THERE!
366
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:50,999
SWIM OUT HERE AND EASILY SAVE MY LIFE!
367
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,999
[ BOMB BEEPING ] IS THAT A BOMB?
368
00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,999
[ SCREAMS ] WHY DOES HE STOP EVERYTHING WITH
369
00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,999
BOMBS?!
370
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:00,999
>> Black Dynamite: YOU SMELL LIKE FISH ASS.
371
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:01,999
[ THUD ] SO, YOU SEE, I AM POWERLESS TO
372
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,999
SAVE - >> FUCK THIS, RALLO.
373
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,999
I'LL NEVER GET IN THE OCEAN AGAIN.
374
00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:07,999
IT'S STRICTLY WATER GUNS
AND FIRE HYDRANTS FOR ME.
375
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:08,999
>> I'M WITH YOU, RALLO.
376
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:10,999
LET'S GO.
377
00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:13,100
[ INDISTINCT CHATTER ] [ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
378
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,999
>> [ GROWLS, SLOBBERS ] HELLO?!
379
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:19,999
DAMN IT, MR. MAYOR, CAN'T
YOU SEE THAT I'M BUILDING A SLAVE
380
00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:20,999
SHIP IN A BOTTLE?
381
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:23,999
>> Uh, Mr. President, I'm sorry
to inform you, but the water's
382
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,999
empty, and the party's over,
and the shark only got one Negro so
383
00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:25,999
far.
384
00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:26,999
>> NO!
385
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,999
THIS PLAN'S TOO GOOD TO
JUST BLOW MY LOAD OVER ONE GHETTO
386
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:31,999
HAMSTER.
387
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:33,999
YOU'D BETTER FIND A WAY TO
GET THOSE SWAMP DONKEYS BACK IN THE
388
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:36,999
WATER, OR YOU'LL NEVER MERK
IN THIS TITTY AGAIN, WHICH IS
389
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:40,000
"BUCKWHEAT" FOR, "YOU'LL
NEVER WORK IN THIS CITY AGAIN"!
390
00:13:40,001 --> 00:13:41,999
>> UH, BUT MR. PRESIDENT,
UH, MERKING IN THIS TITTY IS ALL I
391
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:42,999
GOT!
392
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:43,999
[ Line clicks ] H-HELLO?
393
00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:45,999
[ R.A.C.I.S.T. BEEPING ] >> SIR, I BELIEVE THE
394
00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:49,999
R.A.C.I.S.T. HAS AN IDEA.
395
00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:53,999
>> UH, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
OF THE BLAQUA PARTY, I PRESENT TO
396
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,999
YOU EARTH, WIND, FIRE AND WATER IN THE WATER.
397
00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:58,999
>> OH, FIRE AND WATER!
398
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,999
>> ♪ DO YOU REMEMBER... >> DAMN.
399
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,999
NOBODY CAN RESIST EARTH, WIND, FIRE AND WATER.
400
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:03,999
COME ON, RALLO.
401
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:07,999
[ ALL CHEERING ] >> Black Dynamite: MNH-MNH.
402
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:08,999
COME BACK! IT'S TOO DANGEROUS!
403
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,999
>> Cream Corn: I MEAN, IT
WAS JUST ONE LITTLE SHARK ATTACK.
404
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:12,999
>> Bullhorn: MAN, IT MAY BE
RISKY, BUT THIS CONCERT I CANNOT
405
00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:14,999
PASS.
406
00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:15,999
WE BETTER MOVE FAST 'CAUSE
AIN'T NO TELLIN' HOW LONG OUR ASSES
407
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:16,999
WILL LAST.
408
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:17,999
>> Honey Bee: OH, PLEASE.
409
00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:18,999
A SHARK CAN BITE MY ARM OFF.
410
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:20,999
I'M-A GET ME A MAN TO TURN DOWN BEFORE I LEAVE.
411
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:21,999
>> Black Dynamite: CREAM CORN!
412
00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:24,999
HONEY BEE! BULLHORN!
413
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,999
WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU, AND
WHY ARE YOU SNEAKING UP BEHIND ME
414
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:27,999
ALL MYSTERIOUS LIKE THAT?
415
00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:31,999
[ WIND RUSHING ] >> I WAS ONCE TOLD THAT BITCHES
416
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:35,240
LIKE MYSTERIOUS MOTHERFUCKERS
SO EVER SINCE THEN, I'VE TRIED TO
417
00:14:35,241 --> 00:14:37,999
BE A MYSTERIOUS MOTHERFUCKER
>> Black Dynamite: FIRST OF ALL,
418
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,999
IT'S CLEAR THAT THAT'S NOT WORKING OUT FOR YOU.
419
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:40,999
SECOND OF ALL, THAT STILL
DOESN'T TELL ME WHO THE HELL YOU
420
00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:41,999
ARE.
421
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:43,999
>> OH, MY NAME IS CAPTAIN QUINTON.
422
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:46,999
I'M A CONSERVATIONIST AND LOVER
OF EVERY GODDAMN THING AQUATIC.
423
00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:48,999
SOME CALL ME A NUT, BUT
I'M REALLY JUST A "SEAMAN."
424
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:50,999
[ GIGGLES ] THAT WAS A JOKE.
425
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:51,999
AW, WHATEVER.
426
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,999
I'VE TRAVELED THE WORLD AND THE SEVEN SEAS.
427
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,000
EVERYBODY'S LOOKING FOR SOMETHING.
428
00:14:57,001 --> 00:14:59,999
BUT WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR IS
THAT 200-YEAR-OLD SHARK THAT HAS JUST
429
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:01,999
REDEVELOPED THE TASTE FOR BLACK BLOOD.
430
00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:02,999
>> Black Dynamite: BLACK BLOOD?
431
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,999
PLEASE TELL ME THAT WAS JUST ANOTHER CORNY JOKE.
432
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:05,999
>> OH, I NEVER JOKE.
433
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,460
YOU THINK THAT WAS A FUCKIN' RANDOM SHARK ATTACK?
434
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,999
THAT WAS THE WORK OF BLACK JAWS.
435
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:13,999
[ MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYS
] >> Black Dynamite: BLACK JAWS?
436
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,050
DAMN.
437
00:15:15,051 --> 00:15:16,999
I USED TO KNOW A BITCH
NAMED BLACK JAWS, AND SHE WAS A
438
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:18,999
MAN-EATER, TOO, BUT THAT'S ANOTHER STORY.
439
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:18,999
GO ON, CAPTAIN.
440
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:20,999
>> ALL RIGHT.
441
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:22,999
BUT I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR
ABOUT THAT BITCH A LITTLE LATER.
442
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:25,999
NOW, IT ALL STARTED BACK
IN SLAVERY, WITH TWO SLAVE CATS
443
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:26,999
NAMED RALLO.
444
00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:27,999
>> COME ON, NOW. ROLL THE DICE.
445
00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:30,999
>> YEAH, NIGGA, STOP WASTING OUR TIME.
446
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,999
>> HA HA! SNAKE EYES, BITCH!
447
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:33,999
GIVE IT UP, RALLO!
448
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:34,999
>> SHIT! HERE HE COMES.
449
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:35,999
>> ALL RIGHT.
450
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:37,999
YOU BOYS BETTER NOT BE
DOWN THERE HAVING A GOOD TIME.
451
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:40,999
REMEMBER, THIS IS SLAVERY!
452
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:43,999
>> RALLO, WE CAN'T HAVE
NO FUN WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKAS
453
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:44,999
ENSLAVING US!
454
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,999
>> I'M ABOUT TO GET THE HELL UP OUT OF HERE, MAN.
455
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:48,999
WE CAN'T BE TOO FAR FROM AFRICA.
456
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:49,999
COME ON!
457
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,999
>> SHH!
458
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:54,999
>> ALL RIGHT. LET'S GOOOO!
459
00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:55,999
FREEDOM!
460
00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,999
[ SCREAMS ] >> [ SCREAMS ]
461
00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,999
>> THIS IS A BAD IDEA, RALLO!
462
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:04,999
[ BLACK JAWS GROWLING ] [ ALL SCREAM ]
463
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:07,999
>> FOR MANY YEARS AFTER THAT,
BLACK JAWS FOLLOWED EVERY DAMN
464
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,999
SLAVE SHIP IN HOPES OF GETTING
SOME MORE OF THAT BLACK BLOOD,
465
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:14,000
AND BLACKS STAYED OUT THE
WATER FOR MORE THAN 200 YEARS.
466
00:16:14,001 --> 00:16:16,999
NOW, IF WE DON'T DESTROY
BLACK JAWS NOW, BLACKS WILL
467
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:18,999
NEVER BE ABLE TO SWIM IN PEACE AGAIN.
468
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:20,999
>> Black Dynamite: BUT WHY BLACK BLOOD?
469
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:21,999
>> HELL, I DON'T KNOW.
470
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:23,999
BLACK MOTHERFUCKAS MIGHT TASTE
LIKE PUMPKIN PIE, BUT I'D NEVER
471
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:24,999
KNOW THAT.
472
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:25,999
WHY?
473
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:26,999
'CAUSE I DON'T EAT BLACK MOTHERFUCKAS
474
00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:28,999
NOW, LOOK, BLACK DYNAMITE,
THE FUTURE OF BLACK SWIMMING IS IN
475
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:29,999
YOUR HANDS.
476
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:30,999
>> Black Dynamite: WAIT.
477
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:31,999
WHY MY HANDS?
478
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:35,120
>> 'CAUSE I CAN GIVE TWO SQUID
SHITS ABOUT YOU SUCKAS SWIMMIN',
479
00:16:35,121 --> 00:16:38,999
BUT BECAUSE I'M A MYSTERIOUS
NEGRO THAT JUST HAPPENS TO LIKE
480
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:41,999
CHASING BLACK SHARKS, I'M-A HELP YOU.
481
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:45,000
[ ALL CHEERING ] >> ♪ BA DE YA
482
00:16:45,001 --> 00:16:46,999
>> YEAH, YEAH, YEAH!
483
00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:48,999
♪ BA DE YA [ ALL SCREAM ]
484
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:51,460
♪ DANCING IN SEPTEMBER
>> Honey Bee: OH, MY GOD!
485
00:16:51,461 --> 00:16:51,999
IT ATE WATER! DAMN IT!
486
00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,999
I ALMOST HAD HIM, TOO.
487
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,999
>> I WANT TO RUN, RALLO, BUT
WHEN'S THE NEXT TIME WE'RE GONNA
488
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:58,999
GET A FREE EARTH, WIND, FIRE AND WATER
489
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:00,999
CONCERT - I MEAN A EARTH, WIND, AND FIRE CONCERT.
490
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:02,999
>> YEAH, YEAH, HE PROBABLY ALREADY DONE EATING.
491
00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:03,999
HE ALREADY ATE TWO.
492
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:07,000
[ ALL SCREAMING ] I MEAN HE ALREADY THREE GUYS,
493
00:17:07,001 --> 00:17:09,999
SO, YEAH, HE PROBABLY AIN'T EVEN HUNGRY NO MORE.
494
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:10,999
AIN'T THAT RIGHT, RALLO?
495
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,999
[ BLACK JAWS GROWLING ]
>> Honey Bee: OKAY, THAT DID IT.
496
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:14,999
ENOUGH EARTH, WIND, FIRE AND WATER FOR ME.
497
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:15,999
>> Cream Corn: Y'ALL GO AHEAD.
498
00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:16,999
I'M STILL WAITING ON MY SONG.
499
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:18,999
>> Black Dynamite: HONEY
BEE, BULLHORN - CAPTAIN QUINTON.
500
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:20,999
HE'S A MYSTERIOUS MOTHERFUCKA
THAT KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT
501
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:24,999
SHARKS AND SHIT >> Cream Corn: HE-E-E-E-LP!
502
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,160
[ SCREAMING ] >> Honey Bee: OH, MY GOODNESS!
503
00:17:28,441 --> 00:17:30,999
THE SHARK GOIN' EAT CREAM CORN!
504
00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:32,999
>> NO, HE AIN'T 'BOUT TO EAT HIM.
505
00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:33,999
HE JUST ATE.
506
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:34,999
HE'S SAVING HIM FOR LATER.
507
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:35,999
YOUR BOY CREAM CORN IS A DOGGIE BAG.
508
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:37,999
>> Black Dynamite: DAMN IT.
509
00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:39,999
WE HAVE TO KILL THAT KILLER
SHARK BEFORE THAT KILLER SHARK
510
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:40,999
KILLS AGAIN.
511
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:41,999
BUT SINCE WE DON'T HAVE A
BOAT, MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST SAY OUR
512
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:42,999
GOODBYES NOW.
513
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:44,999
>> Honey Bee: NO, YOU DON'T HAVE TO KILL HIM!
514
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:45,999
HE'S DYING. LOOK.
515
00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:46,999
>> NAH, HE AIN'T DEAD.
516
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:49,820
THAT'S JUST THE SLUGGISH
BEHAVIOR SHARKS EXHIBIT AFTER
517
00:17:49,821 --> 00:17:50,999
EATING LARGE QUANTITIES OF FOOD.
518
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:52,999
THE NAUTICAL TERM IS "THE ITIS."
519
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:55,999
BUT WHEN HE WAKES UP, OH,
HE GONNA CHOMP THE SHIT OUT OF HIS
520
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:57,999
ASS.
521
00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:58,999
>> Bullhorn: I'M TIRED OF JABBERIN' OUR JAWS.
522
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,999
LET ME AT HIM, MAN, AND I'LL - [ YAWNS ]
523
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:04,999
>> Honey Bee: LOOKS LIKE
BULLHORN GOT THE ITIS, TOO.
524
00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:05,999
GET YOUR ASS UP.
525
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,999
>> LISTEN, WE CAN GO OUT AFTER HIM ON MY BOAT.
526
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:08,999
>> Honey Bee: BUT WHICH ONE IS YOURS?
527
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:10,999
>> THE MYSTERIOUS MOTHA FUCKA.
528
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:13,999
[ CHUCKLES ] NOW, LOOK, WE GONNA NEED SOME
529
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:18,000
BAIT - SOME NICE BIG BLACK BAIT.
530
00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:30,999
[ SONAR PINGING ] >> Black Dynamite: CREAM CORN!
531
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:32,999
>> Cream Corn: THE SHARK FUCKED
UP MY HAIR, BLACK DYNAMITE!
532
00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:34,999
>> Black Dynamite: FUCK YOUR HAIR, CREAM CORN!
533
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:34,999
SWIM TO THE DAMN BOAT!
534
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:35,999
>> Cream Corn: NO!
535
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:36,999
LOOK AT MY HAIR!
536
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:36,999
IT'S NOT WORTH IT!
537
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:37,999
SAVE YOURSELVES!
538
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,050
SAVE YOURSELVES!
539
00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:40,999
>> Honey Bee: CREAM CORN,
YOU BETTER GET YOUR CURLS ASS OVER
540
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:41,999
HERE.
541
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:42,999
>> Black Dynamite: HURRY, CREAM CORN!
542
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,999
[ SONAR PINGING ] >> IF YOU DON'T SWIM FASTER,
543
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:49,000
THAT'S YOUR ASS - AND YOUR HAIR, MOTHERFUCKER!
544
00:18:49,001 --> 00:18:52,999
[ BLACK JAWS ROARS ] >>
Cream Corn: [ SPITS, GAGS ]
545
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:54,999
OKAY!
546
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:55,999
>> SHIT! THIS LEAK CAN'T BE REPAIRED.
547
00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:57,999
WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO GET IN THE WATER TO SAVE HIM!
548
00:18:58,000 --> 00:18:58,999
>> Black Dynamite: I CAN'T.
549
00:18:59,000 --> 00:18:59,999
>> WHAT THE FUCK YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T?
550
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,999
YOU AIN'T GOT A GODDAMN CHOICE!
551
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:02,999
>> Black Dynamite: NO, I-I CAN'T SWIM.
552
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:04,999
WHAT - WHAT IF - WHAT IF I FAIL?
553
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:05,999
BLACK DYNAMITE CAN'T FAIL.
554
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:06,999
NO, I-IT'S NOT WORTH THE RISK.
555
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:07,999
SORRY, CREAM CORN.
556
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,999
YOU'RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO DIE FOR MY PRIDE.
557
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:10,999
>> Cream Corn: THANK YOU!
558
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,999
>> THAT'S BULLSHIT FEAR OF FAILURE IS FOR
559
00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:16,060
MOTHERFUCKAS THAT AFRAID OF
FAILING, AND YOU ARE NOT AFRAID,
560
00:19:16,061 --> 00:19:17,999
AND YOU DON'T FAIL!
561
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:18,999
WHAT'S SOMETHING YOU CAN DO WELL?
562
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:20,999
>> Black Dynamite: UH, I FIGHT.
563
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:22,999
I FUCK I FUCK AND FIGHT.
564
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:23,999
>> THEN THAT'S IT!
565
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:24,999
>> Black Dynamite: WHAT'S IT?
566
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,999
>> YOU HAVE TO CONQUER THE
SEA WITH THE SAME CONFIDENCE YOU
567
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:27,999
CONQUERED FUCKIN' WITH!
568
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,999
YOU AIN'T AFRAID OF NO BITCH, RIGHT?
569
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,999
WELL, THE SEA IS THE BADDEST
BITCH YOU'LL EVER KNOW.
570
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:34,999
THE WATER'S WET AND PUSSY IS WET.
571
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:36,800
IT'S THE SAME THING, BLACK DYNAMITE.
572
00:19:36,801 --> 00:19:37,999
YOU STROKE IT!
573
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:41,999
YOU IMMERSE YOURSELF IN IT,
AND THEN, WHEN YOU'RE READY, YOU
574
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,999
THRUST HARD, AND YOU GO WHEREVER YOU WANT TO GO!
575
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:47,190
NOW, LOOK, YOU AIN'T GOT NO
TIME FOR FOREPLAY, SO YOU GOTTA TAKE
576
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,999
THE JAWS OFF THIS BITCH NOW - AAH!
577
00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:51,999
[ SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS
] [ BLACK JAWS GROWLING ]
578
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:55,000
>> Cream Corn: [ SCREAMS ] [ SCREAMS ]
579
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,380
[ SPITS ] [ BLACK JAWS ROARS ]
580
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:07,999
>> Black Dynamite: [ WAR CRIES ] HUH?
581
00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:09,999
>> Honey Bee: BULLHORN!
582
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:10,999
WAKE YOUR ASS UP!
583
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:11,999
WE NEED YOUR HELP!
584
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:14,999
[ WAR CRIES ] HERE, TAKE THAT!
585
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:16,050
WH-WHOA!
586
00:20:16,051 --> 00:20:17,999
[ SCREAMING ] >> Cream Corn: HELP,
587
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:18,999
BLACK DYNAMITE!
588
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,999
>> Honey Bee: BLACK DYNAMITE!
589
00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:24,999
>> [ Echoing ] THE SEA IS
THE BADDEST BITCH YOU'LL EVER KNOW.
590
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:26,999
THE BADDEST BITCH YOU'LL EVER KNOW.
591
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:31,999
THRUST HARD, THRUST HARD, THRUST HARD!
592
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:37,999
>> Black Dynamite: [ WAR CRIES
] SUEY! SUEY! SUEY! SUEY! SUEY!
593
00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:39,050
SUEY!
594
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,100
>> [ FARTS ] >> Black Dynamite: SUEY! SUEY!
595
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:48,999
>> Honey Bee: [ SCREAMS
] >> Black Dynamite: SUEY!
596
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,050
SUEY!
597
00:20:50,051 --> 00:20:53,999
>> Honey Bee: [ SCREAMS ] >> Black Dynamite: AAH!
598
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:57,000
[ BLACK JAWS GROANING ]
599
00:20:58,951 --> 00:21:00,999
[ TWINKLE! ]
600
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:01,999
>> Cream Corn: DAMN.
601
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:03,999
WHAT JUST HAPPENED?
602
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,999
>> Black Dynamite: TOO MUCH
SOUL FOOD KILLED THICK JAMES, AND TOO
603
00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:07,999
MUCH THICK JAMES KILLED BLACK JAWS.
604
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,320
I GUESS YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT.
605
00:21:09,321 --> 00:21:10,999
>> Bullhorn: UH, Y'ALL LOOK PISSED.
606
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,999
WAS THERE SOMETHING I MISSED?
607
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:14,999
>> Honey Bee: ANYWAYS,
BLACK DYNAMITE, HOW THE HELL WE
608
00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:17,000
GONNA GET BACK TO DRY LAND?
609
00:21:17,001 --> 00:21:18,999
>> Black Dynamite: SUEY! SUEY!
610
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:20,999
>> STROKE IT! STROKE IT!
611
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:22,999
STROKE IT! STROKE IT!
612
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:27,000
>> ♪ DYNAMITE! DYNAMITE! [ ALL CHEERING ]
613
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:30,999
>> ♪ BA DE YA [ SHARK GROWLING ]
614
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:33,000
[ HORROR MUSIC PLAYS ] >> Honey Bee: AAH!
615
00:21:33,001 --> 00:21:34,999
OH!
616
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,999
[ MUSIC STOPS ] WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, Y'ALL!
617
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:38,999
IT'S NOT BLACK JAWS - IT'S JUST REGULAR JAWS.
618
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:39,999
>> Together: OH.
619
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:42,999
>> Honey Bee: SHARKS ARE BACK
TO EATING WHITE PEOPLE AGAIN.
620
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:45,999
LET THE BLAQUA PARTY CONTINUE!
621
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,999
>> ♪ DYNAMITE! DYNAMITE
>> ALL RIGHT, WE NEED ANOTHER
622
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:48,999
WHITE BITCH.
623
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:49,999
>> NO, NO, NO!
624
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:51,999
>> I'M SORRY, SIR.
625
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:53,999
OPERATION BLAQUA PARTY HAS FAILED.
626
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:56,999
>> THEIR BLACK BLOOD IS JUST TOO FUCKING STRONG.
627
00:21:57,000 --> 00:22:00,999
IF THERE WAS A WAY TO - I DON'T
KNOW - SICKLE THEIR CELLS OR...
628
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:01,999
THAT'S IT!
629
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:06,999
KISS, GET THE CELL SICKLER ON THE PHONE.
630
00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:10,999
>> ♪ DYNAMITE! DYNAMITE [ FUNKY MUSIC PLAYS ]
631
00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:14,000
>> ♪ I'M IN LOVE WITH CHICKEN WINGS ♪
632
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:18,999
♪ THEM STRING THINGS ♪
GOTTA FEEL THAT HYPERTENSION
633
00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:23,999
TUGGIN' MY HEARTSTRINGS ♪
♪ AND WHEN I'M FEELIN' GOOD,
634
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:28,999
START IT OFF WITH [INDISTINCT]
♪ ♪ HAM HOCKS AND BACON GREASE
635
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:31,000
♪ DIABETIC...
636
00:22:31,050 --> 00:22:35,600
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