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1
00:00:04,520 --> 00:00:05,959
Sausage or hot pot?
2
00:00:05,960 --> 00:00:09,960
Hot pot, please.
3
00:00:11,040 --> 00:00:12,399
Chips or new potatoes?
4
00:00:12,400 --> 00:00:16,400
Erm, chips, please.
5
00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:25,260
What would you like, mate?
Erm? Can I have the chocolate crunch
with mint custard please?
6
00:00:25,334 --> 00:00:27,254
Yes, we've got chocolate crunch
7
00:00:27,254 --> 00:00:29,374
but I don't think we've got any
more mint custard.
8
00:00:29,375 --> 00:00:31,533
Lol, have we got any more mint
custard?
9
00:00:31,534 --> 00:00:34,533
If it's not in front of you,
I ain't got any back here.
10
00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:36,533
We've still got tonnes of coffee
whip?
11
00:00:36,534 --> 00:00:40,093
We've got coffee whip.
Coffee whip?
12
00:00:40,094 --> 00:00:43,853
I know.
13
00:00:43,854 --> 00:00:46,373
Lol, is that mint custard I can
smell? Oh, Get out! Out! Out!
14
00:00:46,374 --> 00:00:48,174
Sorry, sorry. Out!
15
00:00:48,174 --> 00:00:49,973
What you do you want?
16
00:00:49,974 --> 00:00:53,974
Just a little bit of dinner. A bit
of that mint custard if it's going.
No, we've got none left!
17
00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:55,173
We've got coffee whip.
18
00:00:55,174 --> 00:00:57,053
What the fuck's coffee whip?
19
00:00:57,054 --> 00:00:59,013
Coffee. Whipped.
20
00:00:59,014 --> 00:01:02,733
Ew, Lol! At least tell me you've got
chips today?
21
00:01:02,734 --> 00:01:06,093
Have we got any chips back there,
Lol? No more chips today.
22
00:01:06,094 --> 00:01:09,053
What? For fuck's sake, Lol. Why do
you always run out of chips?
23
00:01:09,054 --> 00:01:11,373
Everyone loves chips.
Just make more chips.
24
00:01:11,374 --> 00:01:14,773
Make people happy.
Make some more chips. Please, Lol.
25
00:01:14,774 --> 00:01:17,453
Make some more.
26
00:01:17,454 --> 00:01:20,013
Finished?
27
00:01:20,014 --> 00:01:21,493
What are we going to have instead?
28
00:01:21,494 --> 00:01:25,093
A fucking knuckle sandwich
if you carry on, Gadget.
29
00:01:25,094 --> 00:01:28,453
I'm going to make some new potatoes.
I don't like new potatoes. Get out!
30
00:01:28,454 --> 00:01:31,733
You'll get what you're fucking
given. Now go and wait round the back!
31
00:01:31,734 --> 00:01:35,734
Gone downhill this place.
32
00:01:37,414 --> 00:01:39,253
Here he is.
33
00:01:39,254 --> 00:01:40,973
How we looking, Gadge?
34
00:01:40,974 --> 00:01:43,093
Not very good, mate.
35
00:01:43,094 --> 00:01:44,573
What's up?
36
00:01:44,574 --> 00:01:47,893
Well, we've got new potatoes,
37
00:01:47,894 --> 00:01:49,653
no chips
38
00:01:49,654 --> 00:01:52,493
and for dessert,
we've got coffee whip.
39
00:01:52,494 --> 00:01:54,413
Ooh, coffee whip's nice.
40
00:01:54,414 --> 00:01:56,333
Are you taking the piss?
No, it's nice.
41
00:01:56,334 --> 00:01:59,013
My mum does it all the time.
It's dead nice.
42
00:01:59,014 --> 00:02:00,893
What are you frowning for,
it's free?
43
00:02:00,894 --> 00:02:03,973
It's not about the money,
is it, Milk?
44
00:02:03,974 --> 00:02:07,974
It's about the nostalgia, isn't it?
Like, that's why we come here.
45
00:02:10,014 --> 00:02:12,053
I don't even know what that means.
46
00:02:12,054 --> 00:02:15,813
It means having meals that we used to have
when we were happy, when we were kids.
47
00:02:15,814 --> 00:02:18,933
When have you ever ate new potatoes
and felt happy?
48
00:02:18,934 --> 00:02:22,053
"Oh, here's a big plate of new
potatoes. Yeah, cheers, Mum."
49
00:02:22,054 --> 00:02:25,254
Do not worry, Gadge, them
good times will come again.
50
00:02:25,254 --> 00:02:28,253
Will they, though?
51
00:02:28,254 --> 00:02:30,848
Will they?
52
00:04:28,734 --> 00:04:32,734
We're leaving Downing Street for the
last time after eleven and a half
wonderful years...
53
00:04:34,934 --> 00:04:38,573
..and we're very happy that we leave
the United Kingdom
54
00:04:38,574 --> 00:04:41,173
in a very, very much better state
55
00:04:41,174 --> 00:04:44,333
than when we came here
eleven and a half years ago.
56
00:04:44,334 --> 00:04:48,334
Thank you very much. Goodbye.
57
00:05:00,615 --> 00:05:10,678
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
http://UKsubtitles.ru.
58
00:05:43,294 --> 00:05:47,294
Hello, gorgeous boy.
59
00:05:54,934 --> 00:05:58,013
Oh, here he is.
Where the fuck have you been?
60
00:05:58,014 --> 00:06:01,493
Oh, yeah, nowhere. Just the usual.
61
00:06:01,494 --> 00:06:05,293
FBI Gadget interrogating me
about school dinners.
62
00:06:05,294 --> 00:06:07,093
I swear to God, he's smelt a rat.
63
00:06:07,094 --> 00:06:09,933
Has he smelt a rat? Yeah.
Go on, what's happened?
64
00:06:09,934 --> 00:06:12,133
Well, it's the... it's the...
it's the dinners.
65
00:06:12,134 --> 00:06:14,533
It's the portions he's getting.
It's what he's getting.
66
00:06:14,534 --> 00:06:18,534
What's he come away with?
He knows, he knows that what's in our
bag isn't in his bag.
67
00:06:18,854 --> 00:06:20,573
I'm telling you.
How does he know?
68
00:06:20,574 --> 00:06:23,653
How does he know? He can't possibly
bloody know, Milk, if it's in a bag!
69
00:06:23,654 --> 00:06:25,573
Yeah, but he hasn't actually
seen in the bag
70
00:06:25,574 --> 00:06:27,573
because I've managed to fend him
off until now.
71
00:06:27,574 --> 00:06:29,213
Good lad. But he can smell it.
72
00:06:29,214 --> 00:06:32,933
I'm telling you, the guy's like a
blood hound whenever it comes to
anything deep-fried.
73
00:06:32,934 --> 00:06:35,373
So what's he actually... What's
he come away with then?
74
00:06:35,374 --> 00:06:38,773
You see this is the problem, Woods, I
actually feel sorry for him.
75
00:06:38,774 --> 00:06:42,774
He came away today with new potatoes
and coffee whip. Oh, shit.
76
00:06:43,054 --> 00:06:46,013
I mean, I had to pretend that I like
coffee whip and I frickin' hate it.
77
00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:47,773
I can't take this pressure any more!
78
00:06:47,774 --> 00:06:49,493
What do you mean you can't
take this?
79
00:06:49,494 --> 00:06:51,653
It's partly your fault,
really, isn't it? Cos...
80
00:06:51,654 --> 00:06:54,173
How? Well, you've just got to be
better at what you do!
81
00:06:54,174 --> 00:06:56,973
All right, then, here's a solution.
Here's a real good solution.
82
00:06:56,974 --> 00:06:59,213
I'll look after the kids tomorrow...
Oh, no.
83
00:06:59,214 --> 00:07:01,653
..and you... Yeah!
And you, you go and deal with him.
84
00:07:01,654 --> 00:07:05,654
No. You can't swap horses halfway
through a race, can you?
85
00:07:07,134 --> 00:07:08,733
When's that ever been done?
86
00:07:08,734 --> 00:07:11,133
If you want to fix this fast,
take him out of the queue!
87
00:07:11,134 --> 00:07:13,973
Right, well, that's what needs to
happen. Take him out of the queue.
88
00:07:13,974 --> 00:07:16,013
Listen, what's going to happen
if I pull him out?
89
00:07:16,014 --> 00:07:19,133
He's manipulative when it comes to
food. What will he do?
90
00:07:19,134 --> 00:07:22,053
He's going to go straight to Mr Skipper,
that's what he's going to do.
91
00:07:22,054 --> 00:07:23,413
He's going to go in that office,
92
00:07:23,414 --> 00:07:25,453
he's going to pull
the plug on the whole thing.
93
00:07:25,454 --> 00:07:27,813
I don't know what else... What do
you want me to tell you?
94
00:07:27,814 --> 00:07:31,814
I'm going to have to think on it.
He's daft as shit when it comes
to anything in life except for food.
95
00:07:31,974 --> 00:07:35,974
Food, I know, I know.
96
00:07:47,214 --> 00:07:48,413
It's just not bloody right.
97
00:07:48,414 --> 00:07:49,973
What's not bloody right, love?
98
00:07:49,974 --> 00:07:51,973
Taking food from kids.
99
00:07:51,974 --> 00:07:54,133
I'm not taking it from the kids.
100
00:07:54,134 --> 00:07:57,573
If they, if we didn't eat it, it would just
go in the bin. It's from the last sitting.
101
00:07:57,574 --> 00:07:59,853
There's loads of food in the
cupboards here, Shaun,
102
00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:03,173
I just don't see the logic in walking two
miles for some. It's not the same, is it?
103
00:08:03,174 --> 00:08:05,253
You can't recreate a good school
dinner at home.
104
00:08:05,254 --> 00:08:07,293
It's just not right!
What? Sausage and chips?
105
00:08:07,294 --> 00:08:09,013
What's wrong with my sausage
and chips?
106
00:08:09,014 --> 00:08:11,733
Nothing, it's just... I don't know.
107
00:08:11,734 --> 00:08:13,333
No-one knows, do they?
108
00:08:13,334 --> 00:08:17,253
It's just school dinners are loads
better than normal.
109
00:08:17,254 --> 00:08:19,493
Sausage has seen better days.
110
00:08:19,494 --> 00:08:23,494
It looks grey.
111
00:08:30,854 --> 00:08:33,413
Shaun, is now a good time to
talk about college?
112
00:08:33,414 --> 00:08:35,933
No, no, it's not.
113
00:08:35,934 --> 00:08:37,733
Never is a good time to talk about
college.
114
00:08:37,734 --> 00:08:40,053
You know you've got to do
something about that, Shaun.
115
00:08:40,054 --> 00:08:42,613
I don't want to go back to college,
Mum! I've told you this...
116
00:08:42,614 --> 00:08:45,053
Why not, love?
..a million times, cos it's shit.
117
00:08:45,054 --> 00:08:48,053
Everyone's up their own arses.
I don't fit in there.
118
00:08:48,054 --> 00:08:50,253
It's not my cup of tea.
I don't want to go.
119
00:08:50,254 --> 00:08:51,813
You were great in that school play.
120
00:08:51,814 --> 00:08:53,653
Oh, back to this again, are we?
121
00:08:53,654 --> 00:08:56,853
Well, if you would've persisted at
that, just think where you'd be now.
122
00:08:56,854 --> 00:08:59,133
Mum, I hated that fucking
course. You know I did.
123
00:08:59,134 --> 00:09:01,053
Shaun, it wasn't the course
that you hated,
124
00:09:01,054 --> 00:09:04,413
it was getting caught up
in between that young girl's legs.
125
00:09:04,414 --> 00:09:07,053
I don't know what you were thinking?
How embarrassing!
126
00:09:07,054 --> 00:09:09,653
It's bloody true.
127
00:09:09,654 --> 00:09:11,333
I don't want to talk about it, Mum.
128
00:09:11,334 --> 00:09:13,453
I know you...
I don't want to talk about it, Mum.
129
00:09:13,454 --> 00:09:16,213
I know you've been upset
about Michelle. I know you have.
130
00:09:16,214 --> 00:09:17,933
I understand that. Mum!
131
00:09:17,934 --> 00:09:20,213
But you can't spend your life
sat around here,
132
00:09:20,214 --> 00:09:23,373
and you're never going to meet a
young lady, sat around that flat,
133
00:09:23,374 --> 00:09:25,733
smoking them funny fags like
them lot. Mum!
134
00:09:25,734 --> 00:09:29,733
One, I don't miss Smell, and two,
I'm off out tonight as it happens.
135
00:09:29,734 --> 00:09:30,853
Where are you going?
136
00:09:30,854 --> 00:09:33,773
Off down to town hall. There's
a Madchester thing on.
137
00:09:33,774 --> 00:09:36,693
What's a bloody Madchester thing
when it's at home?
138
00:09:36,694 --> 00:09:40,493
Well, it's like a disco. Have you
never heard of The Stone Roses or
the Happy Mondays or owt?
139
00:09:40,494 --> 00:09:42,253
Yes, I have, actually.
140
00:09:42,254 --> 00:09:44,973
Waste of space. You can't hear a word
they're saying.
141
00:09:44,974 --> 00:09:47,413
They look like they need a bloody
good wash
142
00:09:47,414 --> 00:09:51,414
and a good sleep and an haircut.
143
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:58,093
Is it really, really out of the question
to ask for half a cigarette or...?
144
00:09:58,094 --> 00:10:02,094
It's finding half a cig to be
honest with you, mate.
145
00:10:04,334 --> 00:10:05,773
Bit of mix then instead?
146
00:10:05,774 --> 00:10:07,013
Three quarters there.
147
00:10:07,014 --> 00:10:08,773
Spot on, brother, thank you.
148
00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:12,774
Thank you very much.
149
00:10:16,214 --> 00:10:18,293
What? What is this show?
150
00:10:18,294 --> 00:10:20,653
Is it... It should be called
151
00:10:20,654 --> 00:10:24,654
bummy, bummy, bum box telly.
152
00:10:24,734 --> 00:10:27,893
It's WrestleMania, Kel.
153
00:10:27,894 --> 00:10:29,253
It's a sport.
154
00:10:29,254 --> 00:10:30,973
It's gay.
It's a sport.
155
00:10:30,974 --> 00:10:34,413
Look at these athletes, playing a
sport. Warriors.
156
00:10:34,414 --> 00:10:37,373
Warriors. Is there warriors in that?
It's not even real.
157
00:10:37,374 --> 00:10:39,213
They're warriors.
They're trained.
158
00:10:39,214 --> 00:10:41,253
Their bodies are trained to fight
each other.
159
00:10:41,254 --> 00:10:43,693
So you're telling me, your attention
right now
160
00:10:43,694 --> 00:10:46,853
is not going to them fat, cute,
packed little pants.
161
00:10:46,854 --> 00:10:49,933
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Why
would we be looking at their pants?
162
00:10:49,934 --> 00:10:53,773
Look at his sweat patch. It started
from his, his "gootchel" area.
163
00:10:53,774 --> 00:10:57,774
He's working hard, isn't he?
And he's sweating all the way up
to his bumbershnuck pack.
164
00:10:58,654 --> 00:11:01,333
These guys are sweating
because they're...
165
00:11:01,334 --> 00:11:04,213
These guys are modern day
gladiators, mate.
166
00:11:04,214 --> 00:11:06,573
All that's missing here is lions
167
00:11:06,574 --> 00:11:09,173
and a guy doing, doing all
that shit.
168
00:11:09,174 --> 00:11:10,933
I bet you're getting a...
169
00:11:10,934 --> 00:11:14,934
a little titchy-tatchy tuna dicky.
Fuck off!
170
00:11:26,574 --> 00:11:29,613
Oh, what the flipping aid is that?
171
00:11:29,614 --> 00:11:31,493
Fuck knows.
172
00:11:31,494 --> 00:11:32,813
That is unreal, man.
173
00:11:32,814 --> 00:11:35,973
That is literally
offending my ears, that is.
174
00:11:35,974 --> 00:11:39,974
That is fucking ear rape.
175
00:11:48,174 --> 00:11:51,093
Where's it gone?
176
00:11:51,094 --> 00:11:52,293
Freeze!
177
00:11:52,294 --> 00:11:55,853
Only joking. We're not the cops.
178
00:11:55,854 --> 00:11:57,773
Flip and Higgy. Good to see you.
179
00:11:57,774 --> 00:11:59,093
Good to see you both.
180
00:11:59,094 --> 00:12:00,573
You look far out, man.
181
00:12:00,574 --> 00:12:02,133
You're looking well, both of you.
182
00:12:02,134 --> 00:12:05,453
Similar.
Cheers. It's not an accident.
183
00:12:05,454 --> 00:12:07,693
Was that your music, was it?
Absolutely.
184
00:12:07,694 --> 00:12:10,173
Awful, man. It's hurting.
Oh, come on. Loud.
185
00:12:10,174 --> 00:12:14,053
What you into? Roses and shit?
Yeah.
186
00:12:14,054 --> 00:12:16,973
It's gay. It's gay? Yeah. Proper.
187
00:12:16,974 --> 00:12:18,533
And it's a fucking con. Yeah.
188
00:12:18,534 --> 00:12:21,693
Elizabeth My Dear.
Ten seconds long.
189
00:12:21,694 --> 00:12:23,093
What you going to do during that?
190
00:12:23,094 --> 00:12:25,013
You can't cruise very far.
191
00:12:25,014 --> 00:12:26,653
Not in ten seconds.
Not in ten seconds.
192
00:12:26,654 --> 00:12:28,853
Nice one. Ten second cruise.
Cheers, lads. Wicked.
193
00:12:28,854 --> 00:12:31,733
What the fuck do you want, man?
Why are you here?
194
00:12:31,734 --> 00:12:35,734
It's funny you should say that,
Harv.
195
00:12:38,934 --> 00:12:42,413
I'm after some of the, er,
dopas mopas por favor?
196
00:12:42,414 --> 00:12:45,013
The what? Come on, Harv, you know
what he means, mate.
197
00:12:45,014 --> 00:12:47,133
No, I don't. I ain't got a clue.
198
00:12:47,134 --> 00:12:48,813
A bit of Pat Cash.
199
00:12:48,814 --> 00:12:50,533
What?
200
00:12:50,534 --> 00:12:54,534
Some of the old, er, wacktoria
backtoria.
201
00:12:55,694 --> 00:12:58,853
Are you assuming I'm some drug dealer
or summat like that?
202
00:12:58,854 --> 00:13:02,133
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Let's not throw
words around like that, Harvey. Sh.
203
00:13:02,134 --> 00:13:04,293
I think we're safe here, lads, to be
honest with you.
204
00:13:04,294 --> 00:13:07,253
You know, word on the street, you're
the Pablo Escobar on this estate.
205
00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:09,493
Yeah? We've just come to see you.
206
00:13:09,494 --> 00:13:11,893
OK. Right, what do you want, then?
207
00:13:11,894 --> 00:13:13,533
A quid's worth.
A quid's worth?
208
00:13:13,534 --> 00:13:16,133
Just for tonight.
Get it back in the morning.
209
00:13:16,134 --> 00:13:18,213
You won't even know it's gone.
210
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:20,853
Right, you're going borrow a quid's
worth? Yeah, that's it.
211
00:13:20,854 --> 00:13:23,533
It don't work like that, boss.
Let me explain.
212
00:13:23,534 --> 00:13:26,813
There's this bird. Yeah? She's going
to let me shag her
213
00:13:26,814 --> 00:13:29,253
if I can get some of that stuff.
Now, she wants the Red Seals
214
00:13:29,254 --> 00:13:30,933
but any old shit's sound.
215
00:13:30,934 --> 00:13:33,333
So, I'm thinking is, I'm going to
let her sniff it
216
00:13:33,334 --> 00:13:35,813
while I'm up to me old tricks in her
knick-knacks. Yeah.
217
00:13:35,814 --> 00:13:38,453
Yeah? Pop it back in the wrapper,
nip it back round in morning.
218
00:13:38,454 --> 00:13:41,213
You don't have to give me the full
quid back, just 50p or summat.
219
00:13:41,214 --> 00:13:43,733
I'm telling you now, mate,
smelling it won't do fuck all.
220
00:13:43,734 --> 00:13:47,093
It will. No, it won't, mate. It don't work
like that. It will. You have to burn it.
221
00:13:47,094 --> 00:13:49,253
You have to burn it or inhale it or
eat it or summat.
222
00:13:49,254 --> 00:13:51,293
No, it's called sniff banging.
Sniff banging.
223
00:13:51,294 --> 00:13:52,493
Yeah. Right. It's new.
224
00:13:52,494 --> 00:13:54,853
It's hot from the States. OK.
225
00:13:54,854 --> 00:13:58,493
Er, well, if I give it you, then, will
you take your shit heap and fuck off?
226
00:13:58,494 --> 00:14:02,494
Oh, I'll take that one. Go on, mate.
No worries, mate. Enjoy this.
Very funny.
227
00:14:02,614 --> 00:14:06,614
There you go. There's your fucking
quid's worth. There's your molecule.
Thanks. Higgy.
228
00:14:06,654 --> 00:14:10,093
Knock yourselves out. See you in the
morning. See you later.
229
00:14:10,094 --> 00:14:12,533
See you later. Enjoy, boys. Yeah,
nice one. Brilliant.
230
00:14:12,534 --> 00:14:14,173
See you in a bit. Take care.
231
00:14:14,174 --> 00:14:18,174
Take it easy. Lovely.
232
00:14:20,654 --> 00:14:22,573
What a rush!
233
00:14:22,574 --> 00:14:24,654
I can see why that's addictive.
234
00:14:24,654 --> 00:14:26,730
I feel like Anthony Montana!
235
00:14:29,959 --> 00:14:34,090
Right, then, shall we say hello to
all the animals in the zoo?
236
00:14:34,821 --> 00:14:37,300
Shall we say hello to all
the animals in the zoo?
237
00:14:37,301 --> 00:14:38,900
Can you wave, Jimmy?
238
00:14:38,901 --> 00:14:40,300
Say, "Hello, rabbit.
239
00:14:40,301 --> 00:14:41,940
"Hello, donkey.
240
00:14:41,941 --> 00:14:43,420
"Hello, turtle.
241
00:14:43,421 --> 00:14:45,421
"Hello, lion." Roar!
242
00:14:45,421 --> 00:14:48,021
Should I go and check on the kids?
No, she's fine, don't worry.
243
00:14:48,022 --> 00:14:51,340
They're a bit of a handful. Oh, don't
worry. She's so good with them, isn't she?
244
00:14:51,341 --> 00:14:53,180
Sun's out. They have no cream on,
have they?
245
00:14:53,181 --> 00:14:55,340
She's fine. We've put some sheets up
and stuff.
246
00:14:55,341 --> 00:14:58,340
She's made a little kind
of pink tent, pink palace, she says.
247
00:14:58,341 --> 00:15:02,100
Pink palace. She's great with them,
isn't she? Yeah, she is, yeah.
248
00:15:02,101 --> 00:15:04,060
Is she staying here then at the
minute or...?
249
00:15:04,061 --> 00:15:06,300
Yeah, just for a bit.
She's here, sort of
250
00:15:06,301 --> 00:15:08,460
now and then. A few nights,
you know?
251
00:15:08,461 --> 00:15:11,260
What's a few nights, like?
Well, a few nights a week, you know?
252
00:15:11,261 --> 00:15:13,460
A few nights a week?
Four or five.
253
00:15:13,461 --> 00:15:16,700
It's not been easy for her at home.
They've had a bit of erm...
254
00:15:16,701 --> 00:15:20,460
Her mum and dad have split up.
Oh!
255
00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:22,980
So she's just stopping here
while it, y'know? It's a shame.
256
00:15:22,981 --> 00:15:25,780
Give her a bit of stability, you
know, a bit of a normal family life.
257
00:15:25,781 --> 00:15:29,220
So she's come to live here, my
ex-lover, she's... now she's living here?
258
00:15:29,221 --> 00:15:31,740
Well, at the moment, yeah.
At the moment, yes. It's just...
259
00:15:31,741 --> 00:15:33,620
She offered us rent, actually,
didn't she?
260
00:15:33,621 --> 00:15:35,300
She offered you rent? She did.
261
00:15:35,301 --> 00:15:37,660
You said... We said no. Well,
we both said no, didn't we?
262
00:15:37,661 --> 00:15:40,220
That's a really good idea.
263
00:15:40,221 --> 00:15:41,621
Shall we sing?
264
00:15:41,621 --> 00:15:45,621
# Twinkle, twinkle little star! #
265
00:15:46,381 --> 00:15:48,820
I might just go... I might just go
and have a little look.
266
00:15:48,821 --> 00:15:50,541
It's just the lack of cream on them.
267
00:15:50,542 --> 00:15:52,260
No, no, can you... Richard. Sit down.
268
00:15:52,261 --> 00:15:54,060
Jimmy burns. It's his ginger hair.
269
00:15:54,061 --> 00:15:56,340
No, honestly, it's fine. Sit down,
sit down.
270
00:15:56,341 --> 00:15:59,460
There's a little something, isn't
there, that er...
271
00:15:59,461 --> 00:16:01,220
We've got a bit of er, well...
272
00:16:01,221 --> 00:16:02,860
It's a bit of a surprise. A surprise?
273
00:16:02,861 --> 00:16:06,861
We like to think... The kind of
surprise where your kids can't be
in the room, kind of surprise?
274
00:16:07,061 --> 00:16:08,980
No, it's so you can concentrate
on it.
275
00:16:08,981 --> 00:16:10,820
Call it our Cilla moment, if you
will, so...
276
00:16:10,821 --> 00:16:13,420
What is it?
Is it a big black dildo?
277
00:16:13,421 --> 00:16:15,380
Bosh!
Oh, come on, son!
278
00:16:15,381 --> 00:16:16,660
Bzzzzzzzz!
Stop it, son!
279
00:16:16,661 --> 00:16:19,661
Really, no. Went too far. I shouldn't
have done it.
280
00:16:21,661 --> 00:16:24,300
So, what's...?
That's a moving cupboard
281
00:16:24,301 --> 00:16:26,260
with a grunting thing in it,
isn't it?
282
00:16:26,261 --> 00:16:28,460
That's got to be it, hasn't it?
Is that the surprise?
283
00:16:28,461 --> 00:16:30,060
It's a puppy, isn't it?
284
00:16:30,061 --> 00:16:32,100
Shall I er...? Is it a pig?
285
00:16:32,101 --> 00:16:36,101
One, two, three, four. It's moving.
You can come out now!
286
00:16:36,901 --> 00:16:40,901
Hey! Surprise, surprise!
287
00:16:41,141 --> 00:16:44,300
It's Mr Squires! It is, isn't it?
288
00:16:44,301 --> 00:16:47,900
What is he doing in that cupboard?
Why would you do that?
289
00:16:47,901 --> 00:16:49,740
Look at his face. I can't... Why?
290
00:16:49,741 --> 00:16:53,580
Look at your face. You didn't know
that was going to happen, did you?
Hiya, mate. So shocked.
291
00:16:53,581 --> 00:16:55,340
Come here, give us a hug.
292
00:16:55,341 --> 00:16:58,700
Surprise! You weren't
expecting that, were you, son?
293
00:16:58,701 --> 00:17:00,820
You're always saying we're boring.
Yeah.
294
00:17:00,821 --> 00:17:02,860
Not so boring now, are we?
Ha, ha, ha!
295
00:17:02,861 --> 00:17:05,740
Surprise, surprise!
Mr Squires in a cupboard!
296
00:17:05,741 --> 00:17:09,741
Wouldn't call that boring!
297
00:17:39,821 --> 00:17:43,140
Smell. Smell.
298
00:17:43,141 --> 00:17:44,740
Ay up.
299
00:17:44,741 --> 00:17:48,741
Shaun.
300
00:17:50,461 --> 00:17:52,420
How are you? All right?
301
00:17:52,421 --> 00:17:54,020
Yeah, I'm fine.
302
00:17:54,021 --> 00:17:56,300
Good. You look really nice.
303
00:17:56,301 --> 00:17:58,340
Mm. Thanks.
304
00:17:58,341 --> 00:18:00,340
The blue really suits you, in
your hair.
305
00:18:00,341 --> 00:18:02,100
Is that a real bird?
306
00:18:02,101 --> 00:18:06,101
No, I'm a fucking vegetarian.
307
00:18:11,981 --> 00:18:15,100
So, er, how's all the college going?
Are you still doing
308
00:18:15,101 --> 00:18:19,101
all your drawings and that,
enjoying...? Yeah, great.
309
00:18:20,621 --> 00:18:23,220
Would, erm...?
310
00:18:23,221 --> 00:18:26,100
Later on there's this thing at the
town hall.
311
00:18:26,101 --> 00:18:27,860
It's like a Madchester thing.
312
00:18:27,861 --> 00:18:31,060
Like a mad rave. There's, erm, all
the gang are getting together and that.
313
00:18:31,061 --> 00:18:32,940
We're all going to go,
if you fancy it?
314
00:18:32,941 --> 00:18:36,260
I don't think that would be
a very good idea.
315
00:18:36,261 --> 00:18:40,261
Well, why not?
316
00:18:47,181 --> 00:18:51,060
I've met someone.
317
00:18:51,061 --> 00:18:53,460
What do you mean, you've met
someone?
318
00:18:53,461 --> 00:18:55,420
I've met someone.
319
00:18:55,421 --> 00:18:59,421
He's called Harrison,
and I really like him.
320
00:19:02,661 --> 00:19:06,661
Sorry, Shaun.
321
00:19:07,701 --> 00:19:09,820
Well... good.
322
00:19:09,821 --> 00:19:12,100
You know...
323
00:19:12,101 --> 00:19:15,660
..I'm happy for you.
324
00:19:15,661 --> 00:19:19,661
You deserve better than what
I did to you, don't you, so...
325
00:19:21,421 --> 00:19:25,421
I'm pleased you're moving on.
326
00:19:31,261 --> 00:19:35,261
Right, well, I better get
going anyway, so...
327
00:19:36,701 --> 00:19:39,820
At least think about coming
tonight, yeah?
328
00:19:39,821 --> 00:19:43,821
All right, I'll think about it.
329
00:19:46,301 --> 00:19:50,301
All right? I'm cool, yeah.
All right, I'll see you later.
330
00:20:00,101 --> 00:20:03,780
You see, the reason why I'm here is
cos I'm going solo.
331
00:20:03,781 --> 00:20:06,820
I'm leaving the firm. I gave them the
opportunity to pay me what I was due,
332
00:20:06,821 --> 00:20:08,700
and they turned me down flat.
333
00:20:08,701 --> 00:20:10,660
They fired you? So I'm setting up on
me own!
334
00:20:10,661 --> 00:20:12,700
Wow. That's brilliant!
It's amazing, isn't it?
335
00:20:12,701 --> 00:20:15,460
Back here, back where I belong.
Really brave! Brilliant.
336
00:20:15,461 --> 00:20:17,340
That's awesome. There's more.
337
00:20:17,341 --> 00:20:20,340
I want you with me. Oh, now then.
Back where you belong,
338
00:20:20,341 --> 00:20:22,340
by my side! Yeah. Eh?
339
00:20:22,341 --> 00:20:24,140
And I'm not just talking wages here.
Yeah.
340
00:20:24,141 --> 00:20:27,060
I'm talking about partnership.
Well, junior partnership.
341
00:20:27,061 --> 00:20:29,780
A junior partnership?
Profit share, profit share!
342
00:20:29,781 --> 00:20:33,580
And what I'm offering you here, lad.
Yeah? I'm offering you the stars.
343
00:20:33,581 --> 00:20:36,260
I'm offering you the moon on a stick
and a bag to put it in.
344
00:20:36,261 --> 00:20:39,380
I'm offering you the world!
Amazing, that's fantastic.
345
00:20:39,381 --> 00:20:41,700
But the thing is...
It wouldn't really work, would it?
346
00:20:41,701 --> 00:20:44,140
It wouldn't really work because of
the children.
347
00:20:44,141 --> 00:20:47,060
He's got the kids. I'm at work.
You could look after the kids.
348
00:20:47,061 --> 00:20:48,980
She's doing her... dinner lady.
349
00:20:48,981 --> 00:20:52,580
No, I run the kitchen. She's not
just a dinner lady, though, Mum.
I'm there full time.
350
00:20:52,581 --> 00:20:55,580
She's in charge of the kitchen.
OK, well...
351
00:20:55,581 --> 00:20:58,540
But I want you to see the potential
here, Rich. Do you know what I mean?
352
00:20:58,541 --> 00:21:02,260
I want you to understand what he's
offering you, lad.
No, I do. I get it. I do get it.
353
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:06,261
What about if Lorraine doesn't have
to leave her job? You can keep doing
your boss dinner lady.
354
00:21:06,341 --> 00:21:09,140
I can't leave my job. And maybe
Jennifer could look after the kids?
355
00:21:09,141 --> 00:21:12,340
No, no. My former lover look after the
children instead of their mum and dad?
356
00:21:12,341 --> 00:21:15,580
That WOULD be comfortable! I'll be
honest, I'm not comfortable with that.
357
00:21:15,581 --> 00:21:18,060
You've got to see the potential.
Think about it sensibly.
358
00:21:18,061 --> 00:21:20,300
To me, it looks a bit like you're
struggling.
359
00:21:20,301 --> 00:21:23,580
We're fine. What do you mean, it
looks like we're struggling?
360
00:21:23,581 --> 00:21:27,581
I don't... Hang on a minute. Whoa!
I don't comment on you and your
matching weird psychopath gear.
361
00:21:29,981 --> 00:21:33,740
Now, that's just rude. He agrees.
You're being rude with me, Mum.
362
00:21:33,741 --> 00:21:37,741
I'm not being rude. Assuming...
We might look like a bag of...
363
00:21:38,461 --> 00:21:41,780
Stop talking. Don't you judge me
and my family!
364
00:21:41,781 --> 00:21:44,900
We might look like a bag
of unorganised shit sometimes, pal,
365
00:21:44,901 --> 00:21:46,500
but we are... We're fucking happy.
366
00:21:46,501 --> 00:21:48,340
Isn't that every parent's dream!
367
00:21:48,341 --> 00:21:51,540
You fucking presumptuous pair of
arseholes! Woody! That's it. OK.
368
00:21:51,541 --> 00:21:54,260
Let's just all calm down.
You've pissed me off big time!
369
00:21:54,261 --> 00:21:58,301
All right, all right, son. That'll
do, that'll do, that'll do. You've
gone way over, way over the mark.
370
00:21:58,581 --> 00:22:01,380
I think maybe... I just want to
smash the fucking front room up. Sh.
371
00:22:01,381 --> 00:22:05,100
I think we should take a break.
Trying to make us wear slippers and
shit in the front room.
372
00:22:05,101 --> 00:22:06,340
What's happened to you?
373
00:22:06,341 --> 00:22:09,740
This has obviously not worked.
No, it hasn't fucking worked.
It's pissed me off!
374
00:22:09,741 --> 00:22:11,940
Let's just take a minute.
All right, son, all right.
375
00:22:11,941 --> 00:22:15,460
Maybe a cup of tea.
I agree with you.
376
00:22:15,461 --> 00:22:17,580
Coffee or summat, I don't know.
377
00:22:17,581 --> 00:22:20,220
Presuming! Pre-fucking... Making
out... Sh!
378
00:22:20,221 --> 00:22:24,221
We might look like shit, but we're fucking
happy! OK, well, we'll just sort it out.
379
00:22:25,781 --> 00:22:28,260
She's crying now!
Yeah, course she is.
380
00:22:28,261 --> 00:22:32,261
Fucking water works.
381
00:22:49,501 --> 00:22:51,180
Wowee!
382
00:22:51,181 --> 00:22:52,500
What do you mean wowee?!
383
00:22:52,501 --> 00:22:54,580
I've never seen you suck
a bong like that, mate!
384
00:22:54,581 --> 00:22:55,820
It's how I always do them.
385
00:22:55,821 --> 00:22:57,780
It's not how you always do
them at all.
386
00:22:57,781 --> 00:22:59,540
Yeah, it is.
Gadget, how does he do a pipe?
387
00:22:59,541 --> 00:23:01,980
Normally takes a couple of hits and
pretends he's stoned.
388
00:23:01,981 --> 00:23:04,700
Fuck off, Gadge, you're always doing
that! No, he ain't!
389
00:23:04,701 --> 00:23:08,140
And the only time you've been really stoned
we had to take you to fucking hospital.
390
00:23:08,141 --> 00:23:10,420
It wasn't the hospital, it was the
drop-in centre.
391
00:23:10,421 --> 00:23:12,420
They still took you blood pressure
and your...
392
00:23:12,421 --> 00:23:16,421
Well, how would you feel, if you
thought you were swallowing your
tongue? It's a bit worrying.
393
00:23:16,781 --> 00:23:20,781
It's a bit unusual, mate.
394
00:23:23,421 --> 00:23:27,421
How you feeling? All right. Will you
just leave it out?
395
00:23:27,701 --> 00:23:30,500
I'm just having a bit of a shit day!
396
00:23:30,501 --> 00:23:32,060
Why you having a shit day?
397
00:23:32,061 --> 00:23:34,980
It's me mam getting on at me
all the time and...
398
00:23:34,981 --> 00:23:38,981
well, I went to the college
earlier on and I seen Smell.
399
00:23:39,421 --> 00:23:41,421
And don't take the piss, mate.
400
00:23:41,422 --> 00:23:44,860
Mm.
401
00:23:44,861 --> 00:23:46,500
It's just a bit...
402
00:23:46,501 --> 00:23:50,340
bit shit, like, she's got a new
boyfriend.
403
00:23:50,341 --> 00:23:52,020
Is he a pirate?
404
00:23:52,021 --> 00:23:54,940
What do you mean, is he a pirate?
Is he a pirate?
405
00:23:54,941 --> 00:23:58,180
I don't know if he's a pirate.
Why would he...?
406
00:23:58,181 --> 00:24:00,020
So I tell you and now you're taking
the piss!
407
00:24:00,021 --> 00:24:02,860
No, he wasn't a pirate. I've heard
that she's going out with a pirate.
408
00:24:02,861 --> 00:24:04,820
I'm not being funny. That's what
I heard!
409
00:24:04,821 --> 00:24:06,140
Got a hook.
410
00:24:06,141 --> 00:24:07,780
Fuck off, lads!
411
00:24:07,781 --> 00:24:11,300
Actually, I've heard that she's going
out with a pirate, no bullshit.
412
00:24:11,301 --> 00:24:14,540
She's not going out with
a pirate, all right?
413
00:24:14,541 --> 00:24:16,980
Do you really miss her?
414
00:24:16,981 --> 00:24:18,540
Yeah, a bit, like, but...
415
00:24:18,541 --> 00:24:22,541
It's upsetting you that she's
out of your life and that?
416
00:24:22,941 --> 00:24:26,540
Not really, well, a little bit..
417
00:24:26,541 --> 00:24:29,740
Do you know what, Shaun?
If you want, I'll pretend to be her.
418
00:24:29,741 --> 00:24:30,940
I rather you not, mate.
419
00:24:30,941 --> 00:24:33,020
"Shaun, come on, we're off to
Israel.
420
00:24:33,021 --> 00:24:34,220
"Come on, Shaun."
421
00:24:34,221 --> 00:24:36,500
"Shaun." "Shaun."
422
00:24:36,501 --> 00:24:39,780
Don't, lads. Fucking hell.
"Shaun, dress up for me."
423
00:24:39,781 --> 00:24:42,060
"Shaun."
424
00:24:42,061 --> 00:24:44,940
"Shaun, I want you to finger me."
425
00:24:44,941 --> 00:24:47,900
"Shaun, my vulva is pulsing.
426
00:24:47,901 --> 00:24:51,901
"It's pulsing!"
Shut up, lads.
427
00:24:52,141 --> 00:24:56,141
Am I better looking than her?
Tell me the truth?
428
00:24:56,301 --> 00:24:58,860
Am I? Yeah.
429
00:24:58,861 --> 00:25:02,140
You can fuck ME, then.
430
00:25:02,141 --> 00:25:04,940
God, I actually just want go out
tonight now, lads,
431
00:25:04,941 --> 00:25:06,180
and just get fucked.
432
00:25:06,181 --> 00:25:08,180
Oh, well, we'll do that then, mate.
433
00:25:08,181 --> 00:25:10,420
You're not going to be out
partying at the discotheque
434
00:25:10,421 --> 00:25:13,621
if you've just done that big suck here.
Fuck off, mate, I'll be all right!
435
00:25:13,621 --> 00:25:16,340
# There'll be no more
Shauny at the discotheque
436
00:25:16,341 --> 00:25:18,941
# You'll be asking for Mummy
at the discotheque. #
437
00:25:18,942 --> 00:25:21,501
Stop winding me up, mate. I'm all
right, honestly, fuck off.
438
00:25:21,501 --> 00:25:23,661
You're not all right. You're looking
a bit floaty.
439
00:25:23,662 --> 00:25:27,340
Floaty? I'm fucking fine. I'll have another
one if you think I'm that fucking bad!
440
00:25:27,341 --> 00:25:29,060
Go on, then.
441
00:25:29,061 --> 00:25:31,700
Go on, then, babe.
442
00:25:31,701 --> 00:25:33,980
Ah, fuck, man.
443
00:25:33,981 --> 00:25:36,620
There's no way I'm going
back to that.
444
00:25:36,621 --> 00:25:39,540
Absolutely no fucking way.
445
00:25:39,541 --> 00:25:40,740
He'd make me shave!
446
00:25:40,741 --> 00:25:43,060
Bloody hell.
He'd make me shave.
447
00:25:43,061 --> 00:25:45,940
I'm happy, you know? Jesus Christ.
448
00:25:45,941 --> 00:25:48,300
That's the dream isn't it?
Don't you want him to take it?
449
00:25:48,301 --> 00:25:50,260
He does what he wants.
We'll manage without it
450
00:25:50,261 --> 00:25:51,660
but if he wanted to do it he could.
451
00:25:51,661 --> 00:25:54,020
If you want me to go back to the
factory,
452
00:25:54,021 --> 00:25:57,740
hand on my heart, I will go back to
that factory.
453
00:25:57,741 --> 00:26:00,540
I'm not going to make you go back to
the factory, Wood. I know you won't
454
00:26:00,541 --> 00:26:03,540
but we're not going to end up with
a great big fucking garden...
455
00:26:03,541 --> 00:26:05,300
Not on my wages, no.
..on your wages.
456
00:26:05,301 --> 00:26:08,140
You're just a dinner lady, love!
Hey! You're only a dinner lady!
457
00:26:08,141 --> 00:26:10,300
That's what his mum kept
saying to me.
458
00:26:10,301 --> 00:26:13,220
We're all dinner ladies here. She
comes out with some shit, your mum.
459
00:26:13,221 --> 00:26:17,021
She's a fucking gobshite.
"Mr Squires in a cupboard."
I've never seen her like that.
460
00:26:17,021 --> 00:26:19,981
By some fucking evil twist,
you're now the normal ones.
461
00:26:19,982 --> 00:26:21,420
I love coming round here.
462
00:26:21,421 --> 00:26:23,260
I can't stand going round there.
463
00:26:23,261 --> 00:26:24,860
I wouldn't say that!
464
00:26:24,861 --> 00:26:26,620
Trust me, we're not that fucking
weird!
465
00:26:26,621 --> 00:26:29,020
No, we've got two mums.
466
00:26:29,021 --> 00:26:31,580
At least you've got a mum and a dad.
467
00:26:31,581 --> 00:26:33,340
Oh, shit, yeah. I forgot about
the dad
468
00:26:33,341 --> 00:26:36,781
and the hammer thing. That is...
Woody. Ooh.
469
00:26:36,781 --> 00:26:40,781
# Gone too far. #
Yeah.
470
00:26:40,901 --> 00:26:42,620
Why would anyone do that?
471
00:26:42,621 --> 00:26:44,460
How could anyone ruin a...
Just be quiet.
472
00:26:44,461 --> 00:26:46,860
What's going on tonight?
473
00:26:46,861 --> 00:26:49,580
I've heard there's a discotheque.
474
00:26:49,581 --> 00:26:50,860
Is there a discotheque?
475
00:26:50,861 --> 00:26:53,620
Yeah, there's a, erm, a Manchester
night.
476
00:26:53,621 --> 00:26:55,660
Mm, tell me about it.
477
00:26:55,661 --> 00:26:59,661
So, it's like, all the music from
the bands in Manchester that's playing.
478
00:27:00,021 --> 00:27:01,860
Oh, that sounds good?
479
00:27:01,861 --> 00:27:03,420
Yeah, it will be good.
480
00:27:03,421 --> 00:27:06,060
Will all the Manchester
bands come here?
481
00:27:06,061 --> 00:27:08,940
No. Ian Brown wouldn't
grace his presence here.
482
00:27:08,941 --> 00:27:11,060
Who's he?
Ian Brown.
483
00:27:11,061 --> 00:27:13,100
Lol!
I'm not down with the kids.
484
00:27:13,101 --> 00:27:14,860
I know who he is.
485
00:27:14,861 --> 00:27:17,261
Do you? Yeah, I do!
Der, der... Kelly. Go on, then.
486
00:27:18,901 --> 00:27:20,860
# Der-der-der ding-dink
digger-digger dink
487
00:27:20,861 --> 00:27:22,981
# A flink-a-flonk, a wank-a-chink
ding-dong. #
488
00:27:22,982 --> 00:27:24,260
Fucking Idiot's Gold, yeah.
489
00:27:24,261 --> 00:27:26,180
I know about them.
Not quite like that, is it?
490
00:27:26,181 --> 00:27:30,181
Wanky-shank? Wanky-shank,
a-dink-a-flank ding-dong.
491
00:27:30,421 --> 00:27:32,661
Yeah, I've heard them on the radio.
Silly sod. I have.
492
00:27:32,661 --> 00:27:36,661
Why don't you come with us?
I think Lol should come.
493
00:27:36,861 --> 00:27:39,060
What? To listen to that,
dick-a-dick-a-din-ding?
494
00:27:39,061 --> 00:27:41,380
It doesn't sound like that.
Donk-a-ding-dong-ding.
495
00:27:41,381 --> 00:27:43,700
I can't. I've got to pick the kids
up and then bath them.
496
00:27:43,701 --> 00:27:45,940
I do all that. That's no excuse.
I'll do it.
497
00:27:45,941 --> 00:27:48,100
We'll do it. It's not an excuse!
They'll do it.
498
00:27:48,101 --> 00:27:49,540
Why don't you go out, then?
499
00:27:49,541 --> 00:27:53,060
Because I am so busy. Very busy.
With what?
500
00:27:53,061 --> 00:27:56,260
With big long session wanks to
fucking Readers' Wives.
501
00:27:56,261 --> 00:27:59,860
You asked me. I'm telling you. Do you want
me to... I don't want to lie to you, Lol,
502
00:27:59,861 --> 00:28:02,261
or any of you for that
matter. I love you too much.
503
00:28:02,261 --> 00:28:03,780
Are you coming?
504
00:28:03,781 --> 00:28:07,500
I ain't got anything to wear
and I'd have to go back home,
pick up my shirt, come back here.
505
00:28:07,501 --> 00:28:11,500
It's too much of a mission. I've
got loads of your old Fred Perrys
upstairs and I don't wear them.
506
00:28:11,501 --> 00:28:14,980
I'm not going to be dressing up, am
I? So that's a definite. That's true.
507
00:28:14,981 --> 00:28:17,940
Let's get Lollipop dressed up!
Come on.
508
00:28:17,941 --> 00:28:20,380
I didn't have no choice, did I?
Are you all right with that?
509
00:28:20,381 --> 00:28:22,900
Yeah, we don't mind.
We'll feed them and bath them.
510
00:28:22,901 --> 00:28:25,021
Enjoy your wank. I will do.
511
00:28:25,021 --> 00:28:27,981
I'll be thinking of you, Lol.
You better be!
512
00:28:27,982 --> 00:28:29,461
Thank you, girls. Awesome.
513
00:28:29,461 --> 00:28:31,900
You won't lez off in front of my
kids, will you?
514
00:28:31,901 --> 00:28:33,781
Oh, fuck off, Woody!
515
00:29:00,193 --> 00:29:01,593
Thanks for bringing me here.
516
00:29:01,593 --> 00:29:03,352
You're very welcome.
517
00:29:03,353 --> 00:29:05,513
I thought it was just going to be
me and you, though.
518
00:29:05,513 --> 00:29:07,392
Well... Well, me and Higgy.
519
00:29:07,393 --> 00:29:08,832
Like I said, you, me and Higgy.
520
00:29:08,833 --> 00:29:11,512
Just me and you. I thought
we were, like, on a date.
521
00:29:11,513 --> 00:29:13,112
We are on a date, Sonia.
522
00:29:13,113 --> 00:29:16,033
Yeah, the date's just between
me and you. Yeah.
523
00:29:16,033 --> 00:29:19,312
But Higgy's always there.
He's my best pal.
524
00:29:19,313 --> 00:29:20,632
World.
525
00:29:20,633 --> 00:29:22,273
World.
526
00:29:22,273 --> 00:29:26,273
Whoo!
527
00:29:27,953 --> 00:29:29,752
Good upstairs?
528
00:29:29,753 --> 00:29:31,032
Looks it, doesn't it?
529
00:29:31,033 --> 00:29:33,672
There's a fucking lot of people,
man.
530
00:29:33,673 --> 00:29:37,673
Lads!
531
00:29:38,193 --> 00:29:39,752
What's up?
532
00:29:39,753 --> 00:29:41,272
I feel a bit sick, to be honest.
533
00:29:41,273 --> 00:29:43,352
Why? That fucking weed, man.
534
00:29:43,353 --> 00:29:46,552
Here, chill out, man. Chill out. Are
you having a bit of a whitey, Shaun?
535
00:29:46,553 --> 00:29:49,032
You were sucking that bong
very hard, boss, weren't you?
536
00:29:49,033 --> 00:29:50,392
Yeah, it's just the weed, mate.
537
00:29:50,393 --> 00:29:52,992
You'll get over it in like
ten minutes. Don't worry.
538
00:29:52,993 --> 00:29:54,872
Are you spinning a bit?
539
00:29:54,873 --> 00:29:58,873
Shaun, just try and think
about something else, mate.
540
00:29:58,993 --> 00:30:01,192
Do you want a cuddle?
Don't, mate, please.
541
00:30:01,193 --> 00:30:02,512
What you need is more drugs.
542
00:30:02,513 --> 00:30:05,152
I know it sounds bad at this point,
but you're going right down
543
00:30:05,153 --> 00:30:07,912
and you need to be brought back up.
More drugs? Yeah.
544
00:30:07,913 --> 00:30:10,272
Fuck that, mate. No way. Seriously.
This is different.
545
00:30:10,273 --> 00:30:12,672
In ten minutes, mate, you'll
be fucking sound as a pound.
546
00:30:12,673 --> 00:30:15,192
Think of it, yeah, weed's
a downer, speed's an upper, mate.
547
00:30:15,193 --> 00:30:16,912
Balance it out.
Get a little dab of that.
548
00:30:16,913 --> 00:30:19,072
Just have a tiny bit now,
you'll feel right as rain.
549
00:30:19,073 --> 00:30:21,272
Promise that'll make me feel better?
I swear to you.
550
00:30:21,273 --> 00:30:23,072
Dab a bit on your finger like that.
551
00:30:23,073 --> 00:30:24,632
Get it right on your gums, man.
552
00:30:24,633 --> 00:30:28,632
Don't even have to sniff it
or anything.
553
00:30:28,633 --> 00:30:31,432
There's fucking loads on there.
There's not! Yummy. Check it.
554
00:30:31,433 --> 00:30:33,832
Seen how much I had?
Get it down you.
555
00:30:33,833 --> 00:30:36,152
That's fucking minging!
Horrible. You get used to it.
556
00:30:36,153 --> 00:30:38,512
You've had it, haven't you?
557
00:30:38,513 --> 00:30:40,753
Right, come and sit down.
Good boy. Let's have a seat.
558
00:30:42,193 --> 00:30:46,193
You're just having a whitey, mate.
559
00:30:50,153 --> 00:30:52,272
Anyhow, was wondering
if we should get the, er,
560
00:30:52,273 --> 00:30:55,313
Red Seals procedures underway.
561
00:30:55,313 --> 00:30:57,473
Nah, not yet.
We'll have a laugh first
562
00:30:57,474 --> 00:31:00,192
and then we'll do a bit of that.
That'll... That'll be a laugh.
563
00:31:00,193 --> 00:31:01,512
Quite a laugh in store.
564
00:31:01,513 --> 00:31:03,712
No, no, I just want to get
warmed up, know what I mean?
565
00:31:03,713 --> 00:31:05,232
Right, yeah, yeah, of course.
566
00:31:05,233 --> 00:31:07,592
Of course, you'll feel much better
567
00:31:07,593 --> 00:31:10,112
once the narcotics
are into your system.
568
00:31:10,113 --> 00:31:12,192
It takes a good hour so... Hour?
569
00:31:12,193 --> 00:31:13,632
About that, yeah.
570
00:31:13,633 --> 00:31:15,672
Oh, for fuck's sake.
Why didn't we do it earlier?
571
00:31:15,673 --> 00:31:16,872
Well, I wanted to save
572
00:31:16,873 --> 00:31:19,552
the experience of the VIP room
for you, Sonia.
573
00:31:19,553 --> 00:31:22,232
VIP room? Me?
574
00:31:22,233 --> 00:31:24,832
Only the best for you, Sonia.
Only the best.
575
00:31:24,833 --> 00:31:26,272
Is that like famous people?
576
00:31:26,273 --> 00:31:27,872
Loads of famous people in there.
577
00:31:27,873 --> 00:31:30,232
Joking!
No, loads, isn't there, Higgy?
578
00:31:30,233 --> 00:31:33,232
All the... What's that?
Famous people in the VIP. Yeah.
579
00:31:33,233 --> 00:31:34,912
Yeah, yeah. I think, erm,
580
00:31:34,913 --> 00:31:36,512
Des Walker might be coming down.
581
00:31:36,513 --> 00:31:38,792
Des Walker?
Yeah, good friend of ours.
582
00:31:38,793 --> 00:31:39,832
No! Yeah.
583
00:31:39,833 --> 00:31:43,272
Think he'd talk to me?
I could introduce you, no probs.
584
00:31:43,273 --> 00:31:44,472
So shall we pop off?
585
00:31:44,473 --> 00:31:46,512
Go and meet Des? Yeah, let's do that.
586
00:31:46,513 --> 00:31:48,032
Let's hold hands. Yeah. OK.
587
00:31:48,033 --> 00:31:50,512
Oh, is he... Come on, Higgy.
Come on, Higgy.
588
00:31:50,513 --> 00:31:52,272
Yeah, Higgy's coming.
589
00:31:52,273 --> 00:31:53,672
After you, I'll get the door.
590
00:31:53,673 --> 00:31:57,673
After you, mademoiselle.
591
00:31:57,793 --> 00:32:00,752
Hello, Lol. Hey. Kelly.
You all right, Col?
592
00:32:00,753 --> 00:32:02,152
Good to see you.
593
00:32:02,153 --> 00:32:03,592
You look just like Annie Lennox.
594
00:32:03,593 --> 00:32:05,792
Oh, thanks. Bros.
595
00:32:05,793 --> 00:32:07,752
You're very lovely tonight, ladies.
596
00:32:07,753 --> 00:32:10,392
Not as lovely as you, Sonia,
obviously. I was being nice.
597
00:32:10,393 --> 00:32:13,912
Anyway, can't stop and chat. See you
later. See you in a bit. Ta-ta.
598
00:32:13,913 --> 00:32:15,112
Where you going?
599
00:32:15,113 --> 00:32:16,272
VIP.
600
00:32:16,273 --> 00:32:17,392
VIP, where's that?
601
00:32:17,393 --> 00:32:20,032
Yeah, it's VIP, Kelly. VIP.
602
00:32:20,033 --> 00:32:21,993
Not in here, there isn't, surely.
603
00:32:24,593 --> 00:32:25,952
Fucking hell, it's loud!
604
00:32:25,953 --> 00:32:29,272
Yeah, well, it's a disco,
not a wake!
605
00:32:29,273 --> 00:32:31,272
What's this one?
I don't know this one.
606
00:32:31,273 --> 00:32:33,032
This? This is the Mondays.
607
00:32:33,033 --> 00:32:34,712
Oh, is this it? This is it.
608
00:32:34,713 --> 00:32:36,512
I like it.
609
00:32:36,513 --> 00:32:38,512
Fucking hell,
I wish I'd had a drink.
610
00:32:38,513 --> 00:32:41,232
Oh, mate, hang on.
611
00:32:41,233 --> 00:32:43,433
Oh, I should have known!
612
00:32:46,913 --> 00:32:50,272
And this, this is the fucking Roses!
613
00:32:50,273 --> 00:32:51,472
Wah!
614
00:32:51,473 --> 00:32:54,352
Fucking hell, is she all right?
Yeah. She's wired!
615
00:32:54,353 --> 00:32:56,912
She's fine. Come on now, Lol.
We're not kids any more, are we?
616
00:32:56,913 --> 00:32:58,312
Well, go and join her, then.
617
00:32:58,313 --> 00:33:02,313
You're fucking coming with me.
Come on.
618
00:33:40,153 --> 00:33:44,153
Higgy, you'll be wearing this,
I'm afraid, my friend.
619
00:33:44,313 --> 00:33:46,232
There it goes. Look at that.
620
00:33:46,233 --> 00:33:47,912
Perfect life form.
621
00:33:47,913 --> 00:33:51,512
That's it. If you just take
your trousers down,
622
00:33:51,513 --> 00:33:53,112
so only I can see.
623
00:33:53,113 --> 00:33:55,832
Is that a good height for you there,
Sonia?
624
00:33:55,833 --> 00:33:59,792
Just sniff this, then? You just...
You just bend over and sniff that.
625
00:33:59,793 --> 00:34:01,632
I'm just going to have
a quick... Very nice.
626
00:34:01,633 --> 00:34:05,633
You all right, there?
I'll take those down for you.
627
00:34:15,313 --> 00:34:16,472
You after something?
628
00:34:16,473 --> 00:34:20,232
Yeah. Two wraps of whizz, mate.
629
00:34:20,233 --> 00:34:23,793
Nice one, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Have a good night, lads.
630
00:34:36,353 --> 00:34:40,353
If you could just be quiet for
one bit, please. Here it comes.
631
00:34:43,953 --> 00:34:45,952
Oh, my God. Fucking head down.
632
00:34:45,953 --> 00:34:48,512
My head is down, what are you
talking about?
633
00:34:48,513 --> 00:34:50,152
He keeps trying to get a sneaky peak.
634
00:34:50,153 --> 00:34:52,672
I love you so much.
Don't flatter yourself, darling.
635
00:34:52,673 --> 00:34:54,952
I really care about you.
636
00:34:54,953 --> 00:34:57,592
Do you? Oh, yeah. Get ready for it.
637
00:34:57,593 --> 00:34:59,952
What's it like, Sonia, that?
You getting high?
638
00:34:59,953 --> 00:35:02,672
Nah, it's really nice.
639
00:35:02,673 --> 00:35:05,312
Get your fucking head...
Look at him! Look at him!
640
00:35:05,313 --> 00:35:07,712
Real sneaky bastard, you are.
Put your head down.
641
00:35:07,713 --> 00:35:11,713
I love you both so much!
642
00:35:50,953 --> 00:35:52,873
Ergh!
643
00:35:54,073 --> 00:35:55,432
Oof!
644
00:35:55,433 --> 00:35:56,832
Keep sniffing. That's right.
645
00:35:56,833 --> 00:35:58,872
Oh, my God.
646
00:35:58,873 --> 00:36:00,672
He's coming.
647
00:36:00,673 --> 00:36:03,712
Nearly there! Are you finished yet?
I'm coming. I did say, didn't I?
648
00:36:03,713 --> 00:36:06,272
Oh, my God! Head down.
You sneaky bastard.
649
00:36:06,273 --> 00:36:07,752
I am not. I bet you are.
650
00:36:07,753 --> 00:36:09,232
Ergh!
651
00:36:09,233 --> 00:36:13,233
Oh, God, I can't breathe.
652
00:36:58,187 --> 00:37:00,607
'Fires are lit to prepare food
and, during the night,
653
00:37:00,681 --> 00:37:03,541
'Pakan has come up river to supervise
the festivities
654
00:37:03,559 --> 00:37:07,559
'which will lead to the naming
of his child.'
655
00:37:11,679 --> 00:37:14,677
Oh, fucking hell.
656
00:37:14,678 --> 00:37:16,917
Hello? Hello?
657
00:37:16,918 --> 00:37:18,798
Oh, hello, son.
658
00:37:18,798 --> 00:37:20,517
It's your dad. Richard.
659
00:37:20,518 --> 00:37:23,317
Yeah, I know. Dad, you don't have to
give me your... I know it's you.
660
00:37:23,318 --> 00:37:26,237
You don't have to... Dad Richard?
What are you on about?
661
00:37:26,238 --> 00:37:28,557
Thank you, son, that's...
662
00:37:28,558 --> 00:37:31,677
For being so humorous.
663
00:37:31,678 --> 00:37:35,678
Me and your mum, we felt that
we ought to apologise, son.
664
00:37:35,918 --> 00:37:38,917
We're... We're very so...
We're very sorry.
665
00:37:38,918 --> 00:37:40,277
What are you apologising for?
666
00:37:40,278 --> 00:37:42,077
We're sorry. We're very sorry.
667
00:37:42,078 --> 00:37:44,317
We meant well but, you know,
668
00:37:44,318 --> 00:37:48,077
it didn't pan out quite
as we thought it would.
669
00:37:48,078 --> 00:37:51,517
No, it's gone massively tits up.
The thing... Well... Go on.
670
00:37:51,518 --> 00:37:53,317
We'd just like to know that,
671
00:37:53,318 --> 00:37:55,557
if you think we should ask
Jennifer... Oh.
672
00:37:55,558 --> 00:37:58,437
..to stop staying over,
then we are prepared to do that.
673
00:37:58,438 --> 00:38:01,997
No, I don't want you to tell
Jennifer to stop staying over.
674
00:38:01,998 --> 00:38:03,397
We... Because we have...
675
00:38:03,398 --> 00:38:06,157
For fuck's sake.
We have been selfish. We have. Mm.
676
00:38:06,158 --> 00:38:09,717
You know, you've just accepted it,
even though... Listen, it's fine.
677
00:38:09,718 --> 00:38:11,037
Well, it may well have...
678
00:38:11,038 --> 00:38:13,317
It was obviously very,
very difficult for you,
679
00:38:13,318 --> 00:38:15,077
then we went and did that
with Mr Squires.
680
00:38:15,078 --> 00:38:17,677
I don't know what we were thinking...
Dad... Dad... It seemed
681
00:38:17,678 --> 00:38:19,077
like a good idea the other night.
682
00:38:19,078 --> 00:38:21,877
Looking back on it, it just seems
so stupid and I don't know why...
683
00:38:21,878 --> 00:38:24,277
Why we did it. It's fine!
684
00:38:24,278 --> 00:38:26,677
It's... Honestly, I'd completely
forgotten about it.
685
00:38:26,678 --> 00:38:28,237
I'm just sat here watching a doco.
686
00:38:28,238 --> 00:38:30,077
Are you sure, son?
Yeah, honestly, it's...
687
00:38:30,078 --> 00:38:31,717
Honestly, Dad, it's fine.
688
00:38:31,718 --> 00:38:34,997
I don't want you to tell Jennifer
to move out of your house.
689
00:38:34,998 --> 00:38:38,277
I think it's amazing that you're
happy. I'm made up for you both. Eh?
690
00:38:38,278 --> 00:38:40,277
Is Mum there, right next to you?
691
00:38:40,278 --> 00:38:42,677
She is, yeah. I'm here as well.
692
00:38:42,678 --> 00:38:44,197
Yeah, I know, I can hear you there.
693
00:38:44,198 --> 00:38:47,157
He says that he doesn't want us
to say... Course she's there.
694
00:38:47,158 --> 00:38:49,517
To tell Jennifer to leave.
That she can... No.
695
00:38:49,518 --> 00:38:52,397
You just have to say the word. You
just have to say the word, son. No.
696
00:38:52,398 --> 00:38:55,237
Just say the word. No, I'll say
two words - it's fine.
697
00:38:55,238 --> 00:38:57,077
How does that sound? Eh?
698
00:38:57,078 --> 00:39:01,078
He says it's fine. He says,
"Two words - it's fine," he says.
699
00:39:01,478 --> 00:39:03,877
Hilarious, innit?
Ah, thank you, son.
700
00:39:03,878 --> 00:39:06,837
No, it's all right. Listen,
it's fine. It's absolutely fine.
701
00:39:06,838 --> 00:39:10,597
Are you sure? You're absolutely sure?
Absolutely 100% sure.
702
00:39:10,598 --> 00:39:12,717
He's sure. He says,
"Absolutely 100% sure."
703
00:39:12,718 --> 00:39:14,477
Yeah, nine o'clock.
704
00:39:14,478 --> 00:39:16,917
What... What...
What's the documentary?
705
00:39:16,918 --> 00:39:20,918
It's about a tribe living
in the jungle.
706
00:39:21,438 --> 00:39:24,677
He's watching a documentary. It's
about a tribe living in the jungle.
707
00:39:24,678 --> 00:39:26,517
Oh, right. Which jungle, son?
Which...
708
00:39:26,518 --> 00:39:28,277
The Amazon. The Amazon? Yeah.
709
00:39:28,278 --> 00:39:29,438
It's the Amazon. Oh.
710
00:39:29,439 --> 00:39:32,558
Listen, they know about,
er, global warming
711
00:39:32,558 --> 00:39:36,558
without even needing a TV
or a radio or anything.
712
00:39:37,758 --> 00:39:39,637
Apparently they know
about global warming
713
00:39:39,638 --> 00:39:42,437
without needing a TV...
No technology of any kind.
714
00:39:42,438 --> 00:39:45,397
Without any kind of technological
apparatus or anything like that.
715
00:39:45,398 --> 00:39:47,637
They just... How do they...
How do they find out?
716
00:39:47,638 --> 00:39:50,277
Have they got their own sort of
kind of inventions
717
00:39:50,278 --> 00:39:54,278
made of bamboo or anything like that?
718
00:39:55,118 --> 00:39:56,557
Like... Son?
719
00:39:56,558 --> 00:39:59,117
Dad, hang on. Hang on a minute.
Just a minute.
720
00:39:59,118 --> 00:40:01,717
I beg your pardon, love.
Ask him how much longer it's on for.
721
00:40:01,718 --> 00:40:04,117
Oh, how long is it on...
How long is it on for?
722
00:40:04,118 --> 00:40:07,277
It's on for another
maybe half an hour.
723
00:40:07,278 --> 00:40:09,397
Tell him we'll watch it
when you get off the phone.
724
00:40:09,398 --> 00:40:12,717
Well, because... We might...
We might watch it ourselves.
725
00:40:12,718 --> 00:40:15,077
Yeah. And then it'll be like, er...
726
00:40:15,078 --> 00:40:17,237
Well, we can all watch it together
at the same time.
727
00:40:17,238 --> 00:40:19,597
We can, like in different houses.
How mad's that?
728
00:40:19,598 --> 00:40:23,437
En famille, as they say in... Yeah.
In France.
729
00:40:23,438 --> 00:40:26,037
Now, are we... Do you feel like
maybe we've...
730
00:40:26,038 --> 00:40:28,677
Cos this documentary, I'm just...
I'm halfway in now.
731
00:40:28,678 --> 00:40:31,517
All right. Well, I'm sorry
to keep you, son. It's all right.
732
00:40:31,518 --> 00:40:34,237
It's... It's a great weight
off our mind.
733
00:40:34,238 --> 00:40:37,317
Yeah, well, now that I know you
can sleep, will you just...
734
00:40:37,318 --> 00:40:39,277
Just go away?
735
00:40:39,278 --> 00:40:41,437
Of course we will, son.
736
00:40:41,438 --> 00:40:43,077
Yeah. OK, son.
737
00:40:43,078 --> 00:40:47,077
All right, Dad. I love you.
Love you, Mum. Bye, then.
738
00:40:47,078 --> 00:40:49,677
He says he loves you. Love you too,
darling. Speak to you soon.
739
00:40:49,678 --> 00:40:52,277
She says she loves you too.
All right. All right.
740
00:40:52,278 --> 00:40:54,077
All right, son. Thanks ever so much.
741
00:40:54,078 --> 00:40:56,877
Yeah, I've got to go. See you
in a bit. All right, bye, Dad.
742
00:40:56,878 --> 00:40:58,477
Bye, bye, bye, bye.
743
00:40:58,478 --> 00:41:00,397
Fucking hell. Bye, bye, bye.
744
00:41:00,398 --> 00:41:03,037
'..with the family households
of the women and their husbands
745
00:41:03,038 --> 00:41:04,677
'around the circumference.
746
00:41:04,678 --> 00:41:07,197
'A political order of relations
among the age groups
747
00:41:07,198 --> 00:41:09,037
'and the performance
of public ceremony
748
00:41:09,038 --> 00:41:12,237
'have their focus in the men's house.
749
00:41:12,238 --> 00:41:15,077
'At the age of eight, he's removed
from his family house
750
00:41:15,078 --> 00:41:17,797
'round the edge of the circle and
goes to live in the men's house,
751
00:41:17,798 --> 00:41:19,997
'which functions
like a boarding school.'
752
00:41:19,998 --> 00:41:22,517
I'm hungry. I'm fucking starving.
753
00:41:22,518 --> 00:41:24,477
You're always hungry.
You're always hungry.
754
00:41:24,478 --> 00:41:26,517
I'm not eating after that.
What we having?
755
00:41:26,518 --> 00:41:30,517
Deep pan? No, don't fancy that.
756
00:41:30,518 --> 00:41:31,717
Curry?
757
00:41:31,718 --> 00:41:34,117
Curry, that's what I want.
I haven't had curry for ages.
758
00:41:34,118 --> 00:41:36,557
Are you, Shaun? Yeah, who are you?
759
00:41:36,558 --> 00:41:38,997
I'm Harris.
I'm Michelle's boyfriend.
760
00:41:38,998 --> 00:41:40,877
Michelle, as in Smell?
761
00:41:40,878 --> 00:41:42,277
Yeah.
762
00:41:42,278 --> 00:41:46,278
She told me to come tell you that
she's sorry that she couldn't come,
763
00:41:46,318 --> 00:41:48,317
she felt a bit uncomfortable,
764
00:41:48,318 --> 00:41:50,437
so hope that we're cool.
765
00:41:50,438 --> 00:41:52,477
Why do you think
it's fucking acceptable
766
00:41:52,478 --> 00:41:53,917
to come over here and tell me that?
767
00:41:53,918 --> 00:41:57,117
Like I give a fuck what you two
get up to or talk about.
768
00:41:57,118 --> 00:41:59,477
I couldn't give a fuck.
Well, you cared about Michelle.
769
00:41:59,478 --> 00:42:01,597
I do, but I don't care about you.
770
00:42:01,598 --> 00:42:03,677
Yeah, but I'm doing this
for Michelle.
771
00:42:03,678 --> 00:42:05,957
I'm making it comfortable for her.
772
00:42:05,958 --> 00:42:08,317
Fuck off, mate. Yeah, I think
you'd better leave it now.
773
00:42:08,318 --> 00:42:12,318
Leave it now, mate, yeah? Thanks for
you time, Harris. Cheers for that.
774
00:42:12,518 --> 00:42:14,077
What the fuck? Why would he do that?
775
00:42:14,078 --> 00:42:16,717
No, hang on a minute! Oi!
Oi, no, Shaun. Shaun! Shaun, lad.
776
00:42:16,718 --> 00:42:19,117
Why do you think you can come
over here in front of my mates
777
00:42:19,118 --> 00:42:21,677
and fucking talk to me like that?
What are you talking about?
778
00:42:21,678 --> 00:42:23,837
Why do you think it's acceptable
to come over there
779
00:42:23,838 --> 00:42:26,437
and say that you're Michelle's
boyfriend? Like I give a fuck.
780
00:42:26,438 --> 00:42:28,957
Do you not think it would have been
just left better unsaid,
781
00:42:28,958 --> 00:42:31,357
do you know what I mean?
No. I was doing it for Michelle.
782
00:42:31,358 --> 00:42:34,557
Fuck off, mate. What the fuck?
783
00:42:34,558 --> 00:42:35,678
Fucking hell!
784
00:42:54,598 --> 00:42:57,278
Calm down, mate! Fucking idiot!
785
00:42:57,278 --> 00:42:59,197
Stop it. Stop it.
786
00:42:59,198 --> 00:43:03,198
Drink some blood, you fucking
nobheads. Fucking idiot.
787
00:43:10,158 --> 00:43:11,885
This is why I don't go out.
788
00:43:14,885 --> 00:43:18,885
Preuzeto sa www.titlovi.com
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