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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,524 --> 00:00:05,831 Roger, how are the ice-skating lesson going? 2 00:00:05,875 --> 00:00:07,267 Harder than I thought. 3 00:00:07,310 --> 00:00:09,182 I didn't realizeI'd be teaching them. 4 00:00:09,226 --> 00:00:11,619 [ Air horn blares] 5 00:00:11,663 --> 00:00:15,624 You douche-B's ready for my big bachelor party weekend? 6 00:00:15,666 --> 00:00:18,321 Klaus, bachelor parties arefor men who are getting married. 7 00:00:18,365 --> 00:00:20,280 You're not a man,and you're not getting married. 8 00:00:20,324 --> 00:00:22,283 Case closed.Guilty of being wrong. 9 00:00:22,326 --> 00:00:24,501 Your sentencing will be Monday at 9:00 a.m. 10 00:00:24,545 --> 00:00:26,199 But that's when I'm getting married! 11 00:00:26,242 --> 00:00:28,332 Married to your work? 12 00:00:28,376 --> 00:00:29,725 No, no, that can't be it. 13 00:00:29,768 --> 00:00:31,769 To my girlfriend, Shoshanna. 14 00:00:31,814 --> 00:00:34,207 Shoe Hannah?The old woman in the park 15 00:00:34,250 --> 00:00:36,210 who sells shoes out of a baby stroller? 16 00:00:36,253 --> 00:00:37,253 Shoshanna! 17 00:00:37,298 --> 00:00:39,082 She used to live in Steve's room. 18 00:00:39,125 --> 00:00:41,084 She smoked cigarettes on his bed. 19 00:00:41,128 --> 00:00:42,216 Ohh! 20 00:00:42,259 --> 00:00:44,087 You mean Francine! 21 00:00:44,131 --> 00:00:45,479 Seriously, guys? 22 00:00:45,523 --> 00:00:47,743 I've been talking about it all year! 23 00:00:48,917 --> 00:00:50,353 I asked Shoshanna to marry me. 24 00:00:50,398 --> 00:00:52,313 She choked a little bit on her Kahlúa, 25 00:00:52,356 --> 00:00:54,097 and she said she'll think about it! 26 00:00:55,142 --> 00:00:56,926 Shoshanna said yes! 27 00:00:56,969 --> 00:00:59,276 Well, she said, "Yeah, I guess,"but it still counts. 28 00:01:00,277 --> 00:01:01,539 She backed out! 29 00:01:02,584 --> 00:01:03,846 She's back in! 30 00:01:04,933 --> 00:01:06,762 She backed out! 31 00:01:08,067 --> 00:01:10,808 She's back in! I'm getting married next week! 32 00:01:10,852 --> 00:01:13,028 I think I'm gonna take ice-skating lessons. 33 00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,204 Good for you!Way to go! 34 00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:15,813 That's amazing!Good luck! 35 00:01:15,858 --> 00:01:16,814 Married? 36 00:01:16,859 --> 00:01:18,164 I'm getting married! 37 00:01:18,207 --> 00:01:19,600 To your work? 38 00:01:19,644 --> 00:01:21,168 No, no, that can't be it. 39 00:01:22,299 --> 00:01:24,823 The wedding is Monday at 9:00 a.m., 40 00:01:24,867 --> 00:01:27,478 and the bachelor party is this weekend. 41 00:01:27,521 --> 00:01:29,218 You guys have to come. 42 00:01:29,263 --> 00:01:30,960 According to an article I read, 43 00:01:31,003 --> 00:01:33,266 if you don't have anyone elsewith you on your bachelor party, 44 00:01:33,310 --> 00:01:34,354 it's sad. 45 00:01:34,397 --> 00:01:35,704 Hmm. 46 00:01:35,746 --> 00:01:37,183 I really don't want to hang out with Klaus. 47 00:01:37,227 --> 00:01:38,185 Me, neither. 48 00:01:38,228 --> 00:01:40,186 I suppose the bachelor party 49 00:01:40,229 --> 00:01:42,319 is the most sacred of men's parties. 50 00:01:42,362 --> 00:01:46,323 To deny it would be to deny God,the most sacred bachelor of all. 51 00:01:46,366 --> 00:01:47,367 Sounds like fun! 52 00:01:47,411 --> 00:01:48,629 No kids allowed. 53 00:01:55,201 --> 00:01:57,769 you and I should havea fun girls' weekend! 54 00:01:57,813 --> 00:01:59,293 Let's get a stripper. 55 00:01:59,335 --> 00:02:00,424 Mom! 56 00:02:00,468 --> 00:02:01,859 Yes! 57 00:02:01,903 --> 00:02:04,254 Hmm. I guess this could bean opportunity 58 00:02:04,298 --> 00:02:06,864 to learn about the complicatedworld of sex workers. 59 00:02:06,909 --> 00:02:08,650 No kids allowed, Steve. 60 00:02:08,693 --> 00:02:10,347 So, I have to spend the whole weekend 61 00:02:10,390 --> 00:02:13,088 not hanging outwith eitherof my parents? 62 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:16,310 I hate my liiiife! 63 00:02:18,789 --> 00:02:21,228 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. 64 00:02:21,271 --> 00:02:25,318 ♪ I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day ♪ 65 00:02:25,361 --> 00:02:28,191 ♪ The sun in the sky has a smile on his face ♪ 66 00:02:28,235 --> 00:02:32,674 ♪ And he's shinin' a salute to the American race ♪ 67 00:02:34,502 --> 00:02:38,069 ♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say 68 00:02:38,114 --> 00:02:40,334 ♪ Good -- ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. 69 00:02:40,377 --> 00:02:41,421 Aah! 70 00:02:42,901 --> 00:02:46,295 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. 71 00:02:46,340 --> 00:02:48,646 ♪♪ 72 00:02:48,689 --> 00:02:51,432 2010 Sebring convertible. 73 00:02:51,474 --> 00:02:53,259 It's on the secret menu at Hertz. 74 00:02:53,302 --> 00:02:55,131 Remind me why we're goingto West Virginia 75 00:02:56,698 --> 00:02:59,614 Because it's home to the world'slargest sycamore tree. 76 00:02:59,656 --> 00:03:01,268 My boy Scooter got a blow job there, 77 00:03:01,311 --> 00:03:03,661 and I'm gonna put his ashes under it. 78 00:03:03,705 --> 00:03:06,360 Now, guys, I downloaded 79 00:03:09,057 --> 00:03:10,625 Let's check every box. 80 00:03:10,668 --> 00:03:14,455 First item -- "Make a joke about the bride." 81 00:03:14,497 --> 00:03:16,500 Stan, make a joke about Shoshanna. 82 00:03:16,544 --> 00:03:17,240 Who's Shoshanna? 83 00:03:17,283 --> 00:03:19,460 Ohh! Good one, Stan! 84 00:03:19,502 --> 00:03:21,112 Okay, what's next? 85 00:03:21,157 --> 00:03:23,377 "Talk about your favorite thing." 86 00:03:26,466 --> 00:03:28,251 Mine's the Instant Pot. 87 00:03:28,295 --> 00:03:31,298 Shosh and I are doing so many easy, healthy meals 88 00:03:31,341 --> 00:03:32,341 in our Instant Pot. 89 00:03:32,385 --> 00:03:33,387 Wait a second. 90 00:03:33,430 --> 00:03:36,389 Klaus, have you met someone? 91 00:03:36,432 --> 00:03:38,740 ♪♪ 92 00:03:38,783 --> 00:03:42,483 Any second now, Rick Rodfrom Rod Hard Entertainment 93 00:03:42,526 --> 00:03:44,962 is gonna walk through that front door! 94 00:03:45,007 --> 00:03:48,836 Every time I look at hispicture, I get so hot, hot, hot! 95 00:03:48,879 --> 00:03:49,881 Mm-mmm! 96 00:03:49,925 --> 00:03:51,840 Now, this is a man. 97 00:03:51,883 --> 00:03:52,971 Can I see a man? 98 00:03:53,014 --> 00:03:54,538 Get outta here! 99 00:03:54,581 --> 00:03:57,280 I'm trying to get hot with my daughter, not my son! 100 00:03:57,324 --> 00:03:58,933 [ Doorbell rings ]He's here! 101 00:04:05,114 --> 00:04:06,637 Hello, ladies. 102 00:04:06,681 --> 00:04:08,509 You're disappointed. I can tell. 103 00:04:08,551 --> 00:04:11,075 I can read people like other people can read a book. 104 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:12,643 You don't look like your picture. 105 00:04:12,687 --> 00:04:15,342 I know! That guy is so hot! 106 00:04:17,518 --> 00:04:19,997 No, no, no, no! 107 00:04:20,042 --> 00:04:23,088 The batteries -- Mm! The batteries are dead. 108 00:04:23,132 --> 00:04:24,394 It's okay. 109 00:04:28,485 --> 00:04:30,007 We don't have any "D" batteries. 110 00:04:30,052 --> 00:04:32,706 You don't have a single "D" battery 111 00:04:32,750 --> 00:04:36,100 in this castle, Your Majesty? 112 00:04:36,144 --> 00:04:37,233 Sorry, we don't have -- 113 00:04:37,276 --> 00:04:39,365 Enough! If I can't dance 114 00:04:39,408 --> 00:04:40,889 to Bobby Brown's "My Prerogative," 115 00:04:40,932 --> 00:04:43,935 then I can't get you ladies slippin' and slidin'. 116 00:04:43,978 --> 00:04:45,720 Stay put. I'm going for batteries. 117 00:04:45,762 --> 00:04:48,156 That's okay.You don't have to come back. 118 00:04:48,199 --> 00:04:49,463 We can still pay you. 119 00:04:49,505 --> 00:04:51,465 Yeah, no offense, but your energy 120 00:04:51,507 --> 00:04:52,987 makes me feel very unsafe. 121 00:04:53,031 --> 00:04:54,946 Rick Rod don't leave women high, 122 00:04:54,990 --> 00:04:57,384 and he especially don't leave 'em dry! 123 00:04:57,427 --> 00:04:59,386 Gross.Again, unsafe. 124 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,958 I can't believewe've been "bro-coded" 125 00:05:07,002 --> 00:05:08,350 into a weekend with Klaus. 126 00:05:08,394 --> 00:05:10,004 I told you we shouldn't have come. 127 00:05:10,048 --> 00:05:11,136 Yeah! 128 00:05:11,180 --> 00:05:12,528 Klaus is... 129 00:05:12,572 --> 00:05:14,269 frustrating! 130 00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:16,271 Jeff, you're a secondarymember of the group. 131 00:05:16,315 --> 00:05:18,187 You don't have to havea strong opinion about this. 132 00:05:18,230 --> 00:05:19,230 Oh, good. 133 00:05:19,274 --> 00:05:20,406 Klaus: Check it out! 134 00:05:20,449 --> 00:05:22,146 I got us matching T-shirts 135 00:05:22,190 --> 00:05:24,062 that say "Klaus's Boyz"! 136 00:05:25,629 --> 00:05:27,370 I thought this wouldnever happen, 137 00:05:27,413 --> 00:05:29,285 but the era of replacing an "S" 138 00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:32,593 with a "Z" to make a word coolis over. 139 00:05:32,636 --> 00:05:35,899 Sorry, sleeping people,you sound like snakes now. 140 00:05:37,685 --> 00:05:39,947 I've always found whiskey-tasting pretentious. 141 00:05:39,990 --> 00:05:42,646 What, am I supposed to just drink this with no Diet Coke? 142 00:05:42,689 --> 00:05:44,605 Why does this bottle have a warning label? 143 00:05:44,648 --> 00:05:46,215 Cool Luann:This whiskey's 400 proof. 144 00:05:46,257 --> 00:05:48,435 If it comes anywhere near a flame, 145 00:05:48,478 --> 00:05:50,480 it'll explode everything. 146 00:05:50,524 --> 00:05:52,264 Whooooa!Whooooa!Whooooa!Whooooa! 147 00:05:52,307 --> 00:05:54,091 Okay, now, go ahead, take a sip of your whiskeys 148 00:05:54,136 --> 00:05:55,658 and shout out any notes you taste. 149 00:05:55,702 --> 00:05:56,659 I taste grapes! 150 00:05:56,704 --> 00:05:59,533 Afteryou tried it. 151 00:05:59,576 --> 00:06:00,750 Edamame!No. 152 00:06:00,795 --> 00:06:01,795 And cocoa.No. 153 00:06:01,838 --> 00:06:02,839 Egg.No. 154 00:06:02,884 --> 00:06:04,406 Lime. Rice?No. No. 155 00:06:04,451 --> 00:06:05,451 Mustard.No. 156 00:06:05,495 --> 00:06:06,583 My tongue must be broken 157 00:06:06,627 --> 00:06:08,541 from all the making out I've been doing. 158 00:06:08,584 --> 00:06:10,413 No.You haven't tried yours. 159 00:06:10,456 --> 00:06:12,762 [ Groans ] 160 00:06:12,807 --> 00:06:14,329 That's good. 161 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:15,461 And familiar. 162 00:06:15,504 --> 00:06:17,420 When I was a boy, my father said 163 00:06:17,463 --> 00:06:20,553 the juiciest part of the fig tree was the trunk. 164 00:06:20,596 --> 00:06:23,512 So I bit into it and broke all eight of my teeth. 165 00:06:23,557 --> 00:06:24,906 This tastes like baby teeth! 166 00:06:24,949 --> 00:06:26,560 Good palate! 167 00:06:26,603 --> 00:06:28,300 I'm very proud of you! 168 00:06:28,343 --> 00:06:31,216 This gal's really investedin Stan. 169 00:06:31,259 --> 00:06:33,088 And now that you're dangerously drunk, 170 00:06:33,130 --> 00:06:35,307 it's time for axe throwing. 171 00:06:35,350 --> 00:06:37,571 Axe throwingis the new Big Jenga. 172 00:06:37,613 --> 00:06:41,661 The rules are simple --pick one up and throw it. 173 00:06:41,704 --> 00:06:43,141 Axe throwing is on the checklist! 174 00:06:43,185 --> 00:06:45,274 Do we need an axe-throwing lesson? 175 00:06:45,317 --> 00:06:48,058 Only if you're a [bleep] nerd. 176 00:06:48,103 --> 00:06:55,718 ♪♪ 177 00:06:55,762 --> 00:06:57,504 Klaus picked this place? 178 00:06:57,547 --> 00:06:59,026 This is actually delicious! 179 00:06:59,069 --> 00:07:00,071 Guys! Guys! 180 00:07:00,115 --> 00:07:02,334 Guys! Check out my trick! 181 00:07:02,377 --> 00:07:03,901 Man: Oww! Damn it! 182 00:07:03,944 --> 00:07:05,512 Still a pretty good throw. 183 00:07:05,555 --> 00:07:07,470 But I was trying to doa cartwheel. 184 00:07:07,514 --> 00:07:09,124 These are ribs! 185 00:07:09,166 --> 00:07:12,692 We're having a great time, and it's all because of Klaus! 186 00:07:12,735 --> 00:07:14,869 I smoke my meat for 48 hours 187 00:07:14,911 --> 00:07:17,045 to achieve this texture and flavor. 188 00:07:17,088 --> 00:07:18,524 48 hours?! 189 00:07:18,567 --> 00:07:22,528 Me and Shoshanna's Instant Potcould do this in 10 minutes. 190 00:07:22,572 --> 00:07:24,487 Could it do it in nine minutes? 191 00:07:24,531 --> 00:07:25,836 I don't think so. 192 00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:28,273 Could it do it in eight minutes? 193 00:07:28,317 --> 00:07:30,711 I see where this is going,so I'm going to say yes. 194 00:07:30,754 --> 00:07:33,495 Could it do it in seven minutes? 195 00:07:33,540 --> 00:07:35,629 ♪♪ 196 00:07:35,672 --> 00:07:37,586 Come on, six! Six, six, six. 197 00:07:37,630 --> 00:07:38,893 Sign of the devil! 198 00:07:38,935 --> 00:07:41,112 Hear my prayer, Satan, and bring me a six! 199 00:07:42,374 --> 00:07:43,418 -Six! -Yeah! 200 00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:46,639 All: Satan! Satan! Satan! 201 00:07:46,682 --> 00:07:48,163 Well, this has been a great weekend, 202 00:07:48,206 --> 00:07:49,990 but I'm afraid it's time to wrap it up. 203 00:07:50,033 --> 00:07:51,906 Klaus has to be at the church at 9:00 tomorrow, 204 00:07:51,949 --> 00:07:54,995 and it's our duty as his boyz to get him there on time. 205 00:07:57,606 --> 00:07:58,913 One more round, then we go? 206 00:07:58,956 --> 00:08:00,915 Let's do it. 207 00:08:04,613 --> 00:08:07,312 Look, Stan, I have weighted dice. 208 00:08:07,355 --> 00:08:09,096 What? Why? We're already winning! 209 00:08:09,139 --> 00:08:10,968 Come on, seven! 210 00:08:12,839 --> 00:08:13,754 White dice?! 211 00:08:13,797 --> 00:08:15,798 You boys are cheatin'! 212 00:08:15,843 --> 00:08:17,757 Get 'em! [ Grunts ] 213 00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:20,194 ♪♪ 214 00:08:20,237 --> 00:08:21,588 Why did you do that? 215 00:08:21,630 --> 00:08:23,894 Fighting is on the checklist, bro. 216 00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:25,199 Cool! Mark it off! 217 00:08:25,242 --> 00:08:26,680 [ Taser crackling ] 218 00:08:26,723 --> 00:08:29,420 If the waitress comes back with my Bud Ice, 219 00:08:29,464 --> 00:08:32,554 please have her tuck it into my underpants. 220 00:08:32,599 --> 00:08:34,948 [ Thud ] 221 00:08:34,991 --> 00:08:36,427 [ Taser crackling ] 222 00:08:40,736 --> 00:08:44,131 [ All groaning ] 223 00:08:44,174 --> 00:08:47,395 Looks like little fish stickand his peas are waking up. 224 00:08:47,438 --> 00:08:49,485 We're not peas. We're boyz. 225 00:08:49,528 --> 00:08:50,572 Klaus's Boyz! 226 00:08:50,616 --> 00:08:51,748 We are a tribe! 227 00:08:51,792 --> 00:08:53,053 We are a tribe! 228 00:08:53,096 --> 00:08:54,663 Jeff!Let us out. 229 00:08:54,707 --> 00:08:56,230 We have a weddingto get to in the morning. 230 00:08:56,274 --> 00:08:58,841 And I have a wedding to go to right now. 231 00:08:58,885 --> 00:09:00,756 Tough Teddy, will you marry me? 232 00:09:00,801 --> 00:09:01,975 Immediately? 233 00:09:02,019 --> 00:09:04,847 Yes, yes,a thousand times yes! 234 00:09:09,025 --> 00:09:10,245 so we gotta move. 235 00:09:10,288 --> 00:09:11,594 Jeff, what are you doing? 236 00:09:11,638 --> 00:09:14,857 I'm in a cage, and that makes me sad, 237 00:09:14,902 --> 00:09:19,514 so I'm drowning my sorrows in 400-proof whiskey. 238 00:09:19,558 --> 00:09:20,647 That's it! 239 00:09:20,690 --> 00:09:22,038 Roger, I assume you have a lighter. 240 00:09:22,082 --> 00:09:23,605 I do! Somewhere on me. 241 00:09:23,649 --> 00:09:25,782 That very hip ladyat the whiskey tasting 242 00:09:25,826 --> 00:09:28,871 said if this alcoholcomes near a flame, it... 243 00:09:28,916 --> 00:09:30,744 [ Explosion ] 244 00:09:35,139 --> 00:09:38,447 Stan, the casino exploded beforeI could lend you my lighter. 245 00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:39,840 I can't believe we're all alive! 246 00:09:39,883 --> 00:09:40,797 [ All gasp ] 247 00:09:40,841 --> 00:09:42,015 What? What is it? 248 00:09:42,058 --> 00:09:43,104 Am I hurt? 249 00:09:44,932 --> 00:09:45,759 Yes. 250 00:09:45,802 --> 00:09:46,673 [ Whistle blowing ] 251 00:09:49,153 --> 00:09:51,764 Look out! He's calling the Von Trapp children! 252 00:09:51,807 --> 00:09:54,898 [ Dogs barking, growling ] 253 00:09:54,942 --> 00:09:55,855 Oh, that makes more sense. 254 00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:57,118 Run! 255 00:09:57,161 --> 00:09:59,686 ♪♪ 256 00:09:59,729 --> 00:10:02,905 [ Pounding on door ] 257 00:10:02,950 --> 00:10:06,301 Ready to get hor-nay? 258 00:10:06,344 --> 00:10:08,432 It's the middle of the night. 259 00:10:08,476 --> 00:10:09,913 It took me a while to find a Walgreens 260 00:10:09,956 --> 00:10:11,480 that would let me in without a shirt. 261 00:10:11,523 --> 00:10:12,916 Can I come in? No. 262 00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:15,135 You're just like Walgreens! 263 00:10:15,178 --> 00:10:16,441 Hey, everybody! 264 00:10:16,485 --> 00:10:18,922 This house ordered a stripper! 265 00:10:18,966 --> 00:10:19,836 -What? -Oh, my! 266 00:10:19,879 --> 00:10:21,229 Man: At the Smiths? 267 00:10:21,272 --> 00:10:23,144 Fine! Come in. Come in. 268 00:10:23,187 --> 00:10:24,927 I was just kidding! 269 00:10:24,971 --> 00:10:25,928 Oh, it's a joke. 270 00:10:25,972 --> 00:10:28,845 -Oh, okay. -That's pretty funny. 271 00:10:28,889 --> 00:10:30,542 Who are you? 272 00:10:30,586 --> 00:10:32,587 It's my weekend with my 300-pound son, Mason. 273 00:10:32,631 --> 00:10:34,284 He was getting restless in the car, 274 00:10:34,328 --> 00:10:36,070 so I told him to go in through the back. 275 00:10:36,113 --> 00:10:39,246 Now, to turn you on! 276 00:10:39,289 --> 00:10:40,726 [ Button clicking ] 277 00:10:43,860 --> 00:10:47,341 It wasn't the batteries. It was the box itself. 278 00:10:47,384 --> 00:10:48,822 I'm spiraling! 279 00:10:48,865 --> 00:10:50,126 Don't spiral! 280 00:10:50,171 --> 00:10:51,955 I think it's super hot 281 00:10:51,999 --> 00:10:54,130 that you dragged your boombox all the way to Walgreens 282 00:10:54,174 --> 00:10:56,307 and didn't test the batteries before you left. 283 00:10:56,350 --> 00:10:58,091 No, you don't think it's hot! 284 00:10:58,134 --> 00:11:00,181 I'm a failure! 285 00:11:00,224 --> 00:11:01,965 Can I have two red wines? 286 00:11:02,009 --> 00:11:04,967 No!You and Mason need to leave! 287 00:11:05,011 --> 00:11:06,753 Okay, I'm leaving. 288 00:11:06,796 --> 00:11:08,798 Come on, Mason. 289 00:11:08,841 --> 00:11:09,972 Stair fake-out! 290 00:11:10,017 --> 00:11:12,715 [ Footsteps, door opens, slams ] 291 00:11:12,759 --> 00:11:16,153 Steve: Mom! That stripper's in my room! 292 00:11:16,197 --> 00:11:18,547 Now he's opening a vent! 293 00:11:18,590 --> 00:11:19,895 He's in the walls! 294 00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:22,202 He does that sometimeswhen he's insecure. 295 00:11:22,245 --> 00:11:23,856 Which is basically all the time. 296 00:11:23,899 --> 00:11:26,336 I can't understand why hewent into this industry. 297 00:11:26,380 --> 00:11:28,774 He passed the bar on the first try. 298 00:11:28,817 --> 00:11:31,995 Rick Rod: I'm not hiding this body under some judge's robe! 299 00:11:32,038 --> 00:11:34,649 [ Dogs barking ] 300 00:11:36,259 --> 00:11:37,304 Oh, no! 301 00:11:37,347 --> 00:11:39,828 Why did we do this to the car? 302 00:11:41,048 --> 00:11:42,614 The barbecue place! 303 00:11:42,658 --> 00:11:45,008 The meat will throw the dogsoff our scent. 304 00:11:45,052 --> 00:11:48,969 ♪♪ 305 00:11:49,011 --> 00:11:50,797 Stan: Throw all the food at the dogs! 306 00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,885 Roger: I'm gonna knock overthis whole meat smoker! 307 00:11:52,928 --> 00:11:54,931 [ Straining ][ Crash ] 308 00:11:54,975 --> 00:11:57,368 God, Stan,I could have done it alone! 309 00:11:57,412 --> 00:11:59,109 Jeff: It's working!Thank you, Stan. 310 00:11:59,153 --> 00:12:00,937 I couldn't have done it alone. 311 00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,203 Look what I got while I was in there. 312 00:12:07,248 --> 00:12:09,597 Super-long sausage rope. 313 00:12:10,903 --> 00:12:12,034 Klaus, you idiot! 314 00:12:12,078 --> 00:12:14,384 That sausage leads all the way to the dogs! 315 00:12:14,428 --> 00:12:15,647 [ Laughs ] 316 00:12:15,691 --> 00:12:17,605 Classic Klaus. 317 00:12:17,649 --> 00:12:19,173 [ Sniffing ] 318 00:12:19,216 --> 00:12:21,043 [ Growling ] 319 00:12:24,874 --> 00:12:25,961 [ Dogs barking ] 320 00:12:26,005 --> 00:12:28,008 Try the cars. It's our only hope. 321 00:12:28,051 --> 00:12:31,010 ♪♪ 322 00:12:31,053 --> 00:12:32,881 [ Door handle rattles ] 323 00:12:33,970 --> 00:12:35,275 You trying to steal my truck? 324 00:12:40,062 --> 00:12:41,456 That I am. 325 00:12:41,499 --> 00:12:43,631 The casino sicked their dogs on us. 326 00:12:43,674 --> 00:12:47,070 We need a car to get our friend to his wedding on time. 327 00:12:47,114 --> 00:12:48,636 You're a bachelor party? 328 00:12:48,679 --> 00:12:50,246 Well, why didn't you say so? 329 00:12:50,290 --> 00:12:52,683 Take my truck! 330 00:12:52,727 --> 00:12:54,947 And hurry. 331 00:12:54,990 --> 00:12:56,863 Here come the dogs! 332 00:12:56,905 --> 00:12:58,038 Good luck! 333 00:12:58,081 --> 00:13:00,605 Love conquers all! Aaah! 334 00:13:00,649 --> 00:13:02,999 Just enough time to get you to your wedding. 335 00:13:03,043 --> 00:13:04,870 Perfect! We'll make it! 336 00:13:04,913 --> 00:13:06,524 Shoot,let me see those keys. 337 00:13:06,567 --> 00:13:08,091 [ Keys jingle ] 338 00:13:08,134 --> 00:13:09,614 Whoops. 339 00:13:09,658 --> 00:13:12,442 Mr. Klaus, are you livin' la vida loco? 340 00:13:12,486 --> 00:13:15,229 Hold on. I need to do a little flashback math. 341 00:13:15,272 --> 00:13:20,234 The white dice plus the sausage rope minus the keys equals... 342 00:13:20,277 --> 00:13:21,756 You're sabotaging us! 343 00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:23,323 Ooh! Aaah! 344 00:13:23,366 --> 00:13:25,239 I have cold feet. 345 00:13:25,282 --> 00:13:27,067 I'm scared to get married. 346 00:13:27,110 --> 00:13:28,110 Crazy Coolidge: Oh, no! 347 00:13:28,154 --> 00:13:31,114 They're chewing up my Air Jordans! 348 00:13:31,158 --> 00:13:32,332 No, don't be scared! 349 00:13:32,375 --> 00:13:33,986 Zendaya is perfect for you! 350 00:13:34,029 --> 00:13:36,423 I worryI'm not good enough. 351 00:13:36,466 --> 00:13:38,860 You guys didn't even wantto spend the weekend with me. 352 00:13:38,904 --> 00:13:40,254 Is she really gonna want 353 00:13:40,297 --> 00:13:42,472 to spend the restof her life with me? 354 00:13:42,517 --> 00:13:45,912 They're working their way up my Ed Hardy jeans! 355 00:13:45,955 --> 00:13:47,043 [ Fabric tearing ] 356 00:13:47,086 --> 00:13:49,219 Klaus, we shouldn't have said that. 357 00:13:49,263 --> 00:13:52,004 If you're as good a husbandas you are a friend, 358 00:13:52,048 --> 00:13:53,875 she is one lucky lady. 359 00:13:53,919 --> 00:13:55,051 Thanks, Stan. 360 00:13:55,095 --> 00:13:57,139 [ Fabric tearing ]Yep, you guessed it! 361 00:13:57,183 --> 00:14:00,577 My Tommy Hilfiger shirt was next! 362 00:14:00,621 --> 00:14:01,884 Now, let's get you to your wedding. 363 00:14:01,927 --> 00:14:03,885 What about the keys? 364 00:14:03,929 --> 00:14:08,716 Nother set under my Louis Vuitton floor mats! 365 00:14:08,759 --> 00:14:10,110 Aah! 366 00:14:12,590 --> 00:14:14,288 We're gonna make it. 367 00:14:14,331 --> 00:14:16,289 We just have to stop at the dry cleaners to get our suits. 368 00:14:16,332 --> 00:14:19,249 And maybe the drugstorefor some Neosporin? 369 00:14:19,293 --> 00:14:20,380 Is someone hurt? 370 00:14:20,423 --> 00:14:22,251 I can't hear so well on this side. 371 00:14:22,296 --> 00:14:23,600 Don't get old. 372 00:14:23,644 --> 00:14:25,125 How 'bout some tunes for the road? 373 00:14:26,299 --> 00:14:29,912 ♪ Everybody's talking all this stuff about me ♪ 374 00:14:29,956 --> 00:14:32,959 [ Thinking ] Where do I know that dog from? 375 00:14:33,001 --> 00:14:35,134 Is he from a TV show? 376 00:14:35,177 --> 00:14:36,527 From a movie? 377 00:14:36,571 --> 00:14:38,965 Aaaaahhh, the dog followed us! 378 00:14:39,008 --> 00:14:41,923 Oh! From the chasing usearlier! 379 00:14:41,967 --> 00:14:43,403 We're almost to the cleaners. 380 00:14:43,447 --> 00:14:45,580 We can't get out if the dog is there. 381 00:14:45,623 --> 00:14:46,450 [ Engine revs ] 382 00:14:47,842 --> 00:14:50,279 We need to open the tailgate without stopping the truck. 383 00:14:50,323 --> 00:14:51,542 I'm on it![ Handle cranking ] 384 00:14:51,586 --> 00:14:53,196 ♪ They say I'm nasty♪ 385 00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:56,982 [ Dog barking ]♪ But I don't give a damn♪ 386 00:14:57,025 --> 00:14:58,985 ♪ Gettin' girls is how I live♪Hit the gas! 387 00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:00,202 [ Tires screech, dog whimpers ] 388 00:15:00,246 --> 00:15:03,076 ♪ Some ask me questions♪ 389 00:15:03,119 --> 00:15:05,077 ♪ Why am I so real?♪[ Grunting ] 390 00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:06,993 ♪ But they don't understand me♪ 391 00:15:07,035 --> 00:15:08,995 ♪ Or really don't know the deal♪ 392 00:15:09,038 --> 00:15:10,344 [ Tires screech ]♪ About a brother♪ 393 00:15:10,386 --> 00:15:12,606 Aaaaah! 394 00:15:16,871 --> 00:15:18,134 I got our suits! 395 00:15:18,177 --> 00:15:20,397 If we can, I'd love to grab a quick shower 396 00:15:20,441 --> 00:15:22,095 before I throw this baby on. 397 00:15:22,138 --> 00:15:25,793 Is it hot or cold water that gets glass out of your face? 398 00:15:25,836 --> 00:15:27,447 You know what? I'll just push it in. 399 00:15:27,490 --> 00:15:30,102 [ Bell tolling ] 400 00:15:30,145 --> 00:15:31,799 I can't believe the love of my life 401 00:15:31,842 --> 00:15:35,150 is right through these doors waiting to marry me. 402 00:15:35,195 --> 00:15:38,197 I don't know how to thank you guys for getting me here. 403 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:39,111 Rabies shot. 404 00:15:39,154 --> 00:15:40,461 We're your boyz, Klaus. 405 00:15:40,504 --> 00:15:42,115 You don't have to thank us. 406 00:15:42,158 --> 00:15:45,073 Now, get in there and nail that interview or whatever! 407 00:15:45,118 --> 00:15:47,947 [ Slow organ music playing, people crying ] 408 00:15:50,253 --> 00:15:51,645 Oh, no! 409 00:15:51,688 --> 00:15:55,040 They must've killed Shoshannabecause we're late! 410 00:16:01,873 --> 00:16:04,224 Klaus,where's your wedding? 411 00:16:04,267 --> 00:16:06,442 There was never gonna be a wedding. 412 00:16:06,486 --> 00:16:10,011 Shoshanna dumped me six months ago. 413 00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:11,708 You lied about getting married? 414 00:16:11,753 --> 00:16:13,494 Just to have a bachelor party? 415 00:16:13,537 --> 00:16:16,018 No. Just to have friends. 416 00:16:16,062 --> 00:16:18,019 How am I supposed to trick youinto hanging out with me 417 00:16:18,063 --> 00:16:19,500 if I don't lie? 418 00:16:19,543 --> 00:16:23,068 But now that I've come clean,can we go out for ice cream? 419 00:16:23,111 --> 00:16:26,245 It ismy birthday. 420 00:16:26,288 --> 00:16:28,073 [ Whispering ] Shhhh!This is a librari... 421 00:16:28,116 --> 00:16:29,249 No, it's not, it's a church. 422 00:16:29,292 --> 00:16:31,642 ...ian's funeral. 423 00:16:31,686 --> 00:16:32,860 A librarian died. 424 00:16:32,903 --> 00:16:34,644 Show some respect and be quiet! 425 00:16:34,688 --> 00:16:36,951 [ Whispering ] A lot of people don't know this about Sheila, 426 00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:43,088 You can't quiet the bachelor boyz! 427 00:16:43,131 --> 00:16:44,480 We're not boyz, Klaus. 428 00:16:44,524 --> 00:16:47,179 We'll never be boyz with a "Z" again. 429 00:16:47,222 --> 00:16:49,138 Let's go. 430 00:16:49,182 --> 00:16:50,879 [ Dog barking ] 431 00:16:50,922 --> 00:16:53,360 [ Whispering ] Noooooooo! 432 00:16:56,101 --> 00:16:57,058 [ Thudding ] 433 00:16:57,102 --> 00:16:58,495 Hey, kid. 434 00:16:58,538 --> 00:17:00,453 How do we get your dad to come out of the walls? 435 00:17:00,496 --> 00:17:02,543 You gotta challenge him to a dance-off. 436 00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:03,979 Can I get a few minutesto stretch? 437 00:17:04,022 --> 00:17:05,153 Hayley, please. 438 00:17:05,198 --> 00:17:06,460 Steve, go get your fireman hat. 439 00:17:06,502 --> 00:17:09,332 Yay! Weeoo weeoo! 440 00:17:09,375 --> 00:17:11,900 Actually my dad has a stripper rival. 441 00:17:11,942 --> 00:17:13,292 His brother Todd Rod. 442 00:17:13,336 --> 00:17:14,990 If you get my uncle here, 443 00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:17,252 my dad will have to come out for the dance-off. 444 00:17:18,950 --> 00:17:22,127 Anybody need a hose? 445 00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:26,348 We should have trusted our instincts 446 00:17:26,393 --> 00:17:27,698 about a weekend with Klaus. 447 00:17:27,741 --> 00:17:29,482 I feel so duped! 448 00:17:29,526 --> 00:17:31,484 Compliments ofthe orange gentleman. 449 00:17:33,529 --> 00:17:35,531 Why are there fourmilks? 450 00:17:35,576 --> 00:17:37,490 He was hoping he could join you. 451 00:17:37,534 --> 00:17:39,579 And that you would pay for the milks. 452 00:17:40,842 --> 00:17:42,496 No. 453 00:17:46,194 --> 00:17:47,935 They're gonna cook him! 454 00:17:47,979 --> 00:17:49,285 And I'm gonna try him. 455 00:17:49,328 --> 00:17:51,679 No, Jeff, he's just working off the milks. 456 00:17:51,721 --> 00:17:53,984 [ Shouting ] 457 00:17:54,028 --> 00:17:57,380 ♪♪ 458 00:17:57,423 --> 00:17:59,164 It's a damn cartoon! 459 00:17:59,208 --> 00:18:00,557 I can't look at this anymore! 460 00:18:00,601 --> 00:18:02,124 I hate cartoons. 461 00:18:02,167 --> 00:18:04,518 They'll do anything for a laugh. 462 00:18:05,258 --> 00:18:07,738 ♪♪ 463 00:18:07,781 --> 00:18:10,175 Ugh! I'll cover the bill. 464 00:18:12,742 --> 00:18:15,181 Thanks, guys. What's up? 465 00:18:15,223 --> 00:18:17,138 What's up is you're a liar, Klaus. 466 00:18:17,182 --> 00:18:18,749 Well, I'm done lying! 467 00:18:18,792 --> 00:18:20,708 Please, let me back in the group! 468 00:18:20,750 --> 00:18:22,971 I only have one week to live! 469 00:18:23,013 --> 00:18:24,277 [ All scoff ]Wait! 470 00:18:24,319 --> 00:18:26,409 You want to hear the truth? 471 00:18:26,452 --> 00:18:28,541 I didn'tinvent solar panels. 472 00:18:28,585 --> 00:18:32,414 My favorite flavor isn't saffron, it's mayonnaise. 473 00:18:32,459 --> 00:18:34,939 I wish there was mayonnaise gum. 474 00:18:34,982 --> 00:18:38,421 I didn't write the Sublime song "Santeria." 475 00:18:38,464 --> 00:18:40,249 Sublime did. 476 00:18:40,292 --> 00:18:43,164 When I see a child's bike unattended, I steal it. 477 00:18:43,209 --> 00:18:45,993 I still don't know who Barack Obama is. 478 00:18:46,037 --> 00:18:48,213 It's okay, Klaus. Just stop. 479 00:18:48,257 --> 00:18:50,302 You can't go through life lying to people. 480 00:18:50,346 --> 00:18:52,173 I know! 481 00:18:52,218 --> 00:18:54,567 I wasn'tlying about loving the Instant Pot! 482 00:18:54,611 --> 00:18:57,222 But Shoshanna got to keep it in the breakup. 483 00:18:57,266 --> 00:19:00,050 I'll never see it again. 484 00:19:00,095 --> 00:19:01,791 Check this guy out, lyin' again. 485 00:19:01,836 --> 00:19:03,403 Jeff and Roger, no! 486 00:19:03,445 --> 00:19:05,752 You're gonna see that Instant Pot again. 487 00:19:05,796 --> 00:19:07,971 'Cause your boyz are gonna get it back. 488 00:19:08,016 --> 00:19:10,887 [ Gasps ] You're my boyz again? 489 00:19:10,932 --> 00:19:12,454 With a "Z," my dude. 490 00:19:12,499 --> 00:19:13,891 [ Water gushing, man screaming ] 491 00:19:13,934 --> 00:19:16,328 ♪♪ 492 00:19:16,372 --> 00:19:18,721 Powerful stream. 493 00:19:21,463 --> 00:19:24,250 You guys have one song to show us your best moves. 494 00:19:24,292 --> 00:19:26,425 We choose the winner, then you leave forever. 495 00:19:26,469 --> 00:19:28,689 We need music. 496 00:19:28,731 --> 00:19:32,300 Dance now, or I'll shoot you with my husband's guns. 497 00:19:34,259 --> 00:19:37,436 ♪ Everybody's talking... what about ♪♪ Everybody's talking[grunts] stuff ♪ 498 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:39,047 ♪ Why don't -- Move over. 499 00:19:39,089 --> 00:19:42,355 Left-foot stutter step.♪ Live...why don't... 500 00:19:42,397 --> 00:19:44,356 In my way!Mm-hmm, yeah. 501 00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:46,096 ♪ Why don't people just... Ooh! 502 00:19:46,141 --> 00:19:47,272 ♪ Made my... Hurts, don't it? Tell your friends. 503 00:19:47,316 --> 00:19:49,099 ♪ Chillin' Unh! 504 00:19:49,144 --> 00:19:51,364 ♪ They say I'm nasty Yeah, oh, you can't touch. 505 00:19:51,406 --> 00:19:54,323 ♪ Why don't they [Mumbles] ♪ They say I'm crazy 506 00:19:54,366 --> 00:19:57,457 [ Mumbles ] 507 00:19:57,500 --> 00:19:59,022 ♪ Tell me why 508 00:19:59,067 --> 00:20:00,286 Prerogative!Prerogative! 509 00:20:00,328 --> 00:20:02,505 Ugh, my prostate. 510 00:20:02,548 --> 00:20:04,463 Honestly, Rick was better. 511 00:20:06,509 --> 00:20:09,076 did give me a brief tinglein my downtown tinsel town. 512 00:20:09,119 --> 00:20:10,470 I have to agree with my colleagues. 513 00:20:10,512 --> 00:20:13,255 Yes! Up yours, Todd! 514 00:20:13,298 --> 00:20:14,951 That'll be eight dollars, ma'am. 515 00:20:14,996 --> 00:20:17,040 What?You got two dancers. 516 00:20:17,085 --> 00:20:18,694 I had to charge you double. 517 00:20:18,739 --> 00:20:20,871 [ Knock on door ] 518 00:20:20,914 --> 00:20:23,134 Klaus, what are you doing here? 519 00:20:23,178 --> 00:20:27,442 Shoshanna, what we had was toobeautiful to just throw away. 520 00:20:27,487 --> 00:20:29,315 I've been thinking the same thing. 521 00:20:29,357 --> 00:20:30,271 Wait, really? 522 00:20:30,316 --> 00:20:32,622 Yes, I miss you. 523 00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:34,189 Guys, abort! 524 00:20:34,232 --> 00:20:35,451 I love you, Shoshanna! 525 00:20:35,494 --> 00:20:37,192 The wedding is back on! 526 00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,411 [ Glass shatters ] 527 00:20:38,453 --> 00:20:40,673 I got it, Klaus!I got the Instant Pot. 528 00:20:40,717 --> 00:20:42,022 [ Tires screech ] 529 00:20:43,415 --> 00:20:46,680 You only came to get the Instant Pot? 530 00:20:46,722 --> 00:20:48,898 Screw you, Klaus! 531 00:20:48,942 --> 00:20:51,336 Don't ever contact me again! 532 00:20:51,380 --> 00:20:52,947 No doi, he hates you. 533 00:20:52,990 --> 00:20:54,557 Klaus: No, now they'rethe liars! 534 00:20:54,601 --> 00:20:56,298 [ Tires screech ] 535 00:20:56,342 --> 00:20:57,343 Together: Klaus's Boyz! 536 00:21:02,565 --> 00:21:04,174 Bye-bye! See you soon! 36871

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