All language subtitles for Alexander.IRL.2017.WEBRip.x264-iNTENSO

♪ I was living here ♪

♪ Till you disappeared ♪

♪ The house I used to know ♪

♪ You're always
bringing me down ♪

♪ Take me all the way home ♪

♪ Home, home, home ♪

♪ Take me all the way home ♪

♪ Home, home, home ♪

♪ Take me all the way home ♪

♪ Home, home, home ♪

♪ Take me all the way home ♪

♪ Home, home, home ♪

♪ We wrap these songs
in ribbons and hopes ♪

♪ Hurricanes
and first dates ♪

♪ Photographs of birthdays,
there it goes ♪

- Were you just staring at me?
- Uh, what?

What's going on over
there, Lo?

Alex is always staring at me.

He's, like, obsessed with me.

No, that's not at all what--

Which is amazing, because I've
been in love with you for forever.

Are you serious?
I thought you didn't know I existed.

How could I not notice a guy in
our grade who has a thousand views

on his last
League of Legends stream?

- How do you know that?
- Check out my lock screen.

♪ The house I used to know ♪

Oh, my God,
I've been waiting

for this moment
my entire life.

♪ Take me on a-- ♪

- That's a bop.
- Nice.

- Bravo. Bravo.
- Alex Finn!

What, what, what.

It's not what it looks like.

I mean, I've heard
of online dating,

but this is ridonkulous.

Be careful
in detention, Alex.

I suggest if you
want to pass this class...

They'll eat you alive.

Shut up, Darius.
At least he got her to look at him.

Maybe I should start
making out with my phone.

It's probably your best bet.

All right, guys, peep this.

"Multimedia Me."

Your final project of
this section is to combine

everything you've learned
in the last two months

into a presentation about,

as the name suggests, you.

Alexa, what's
the weather today?

Currently,

it's 69 degrees
with clear skies.

Yo, what's up, players?

First day of the week.
It's gonna be lit.

Um, what's up, guys?

Reporting from Rupert
Bailey High School.

Today, pretty nervous,
I've got a quiz.

I'll report to you
the details.

Sounds good.
Hello Lo.

Finished painting my nails.

What's up, ladies?

What? No.

It's 7:30!
I'm gonna be late.

What's the rush?

School starts
in a half an hour.

Can't Mom and Dad take you?

They're about to
leave for the airport.

Oh, right, the honeymoon.

Boys? Boys!

Honey, they're just sleeping,
they're not stubborn.

- All right,
- What is this, TMZ?

Hey, Dad.

You're gonna make us take
our luggage down ourselves?

Come on, boys,
Lyft's waiting.

All right, call my cell
phone only in emergencies.

It's two dollars a minute.

And be sure you turn all
the lights off in the house,

otherwise you'll be paying the
utility bill with your allowance.

Yeah, roger that.

And I want to see pictures.

Of us just sitting
around the house?

No, I just like
to see your faces.

Oh, sweetheart.

I'm gonna
miss you so much.

And you're gonna be tall
by the time I get back.

Probably.

And remember to pick up
your bother today

after school,
5:30 p.m. sharp.

- 5:30.
- 5:30.

And don't forget
to feed Milton.

I'll remind him.

All right, I'm giving
you $200 for food.

Don't blow it all
on steak chips and gelato.

You'll be eating dirt
for the rest of the week.

Where you going, Arthur?

Just pretend you
can't hear him.

- Be careful with this.
- Um, are you serious?

He's gonna blow it all on
in-app purchases and zit cream.

Uh, you try
beating Candy Crush

without the golden
pineapple, mister.

EJ, I'm trusting you,
all right?

Just don't be yourself.

You got it, Dad.

They play Nintendo
too loud!

Tell them I won't
tolerate that.

- What's that, Bernie?
- Where are you going?

Maureen and I are
headed for the Bahamas

- for our anniversary.
- Hi, Bernie.

Who's watching
the youngsters?

They're 17 and 24.

They're perfectly
capable of taking--

I don't trust the small one.

Thank you, Mr. Delaney.
Awesome.

All right, boys,
no horsing around.

And you know what?
Turn off those machines

every once in
a while and go outside.

There's a whole world out
there that you're missing, huh?

- I agree.
- Yeah, okay.

Bernie, you're
watering your shoes.

Gosh dang it.

- Bye. We'll miss you!
- Bye. Bye.

Maybe.

Woo! No parents.

Come on, man,
don't spit in my face

and tell me it's raining,

You're my go-to guy,
brother.

I gotta say, man,
I don't like what I'm hearing.

EJ, what's the status
on the sushi?

The meeting's about to start.

I'm on the phone with
the delivery guy right now.

- Should be here any minute.
- Bring it in right away.

And please button your shirt.

You look like a child.

Spalding Capital.

One moment.

Who hears that?

Yeah, we're not hearing
anything on this end, Owen.

Exactly.
That's the sound of Gray Pop

doing nothing
to change the world.

Why haven't I heard
of a single app

worth submitting for General
Electric's innovation challenge?

Actually, sir, I do have--

Sorry. So I take it you weren't
impressed with the ideas

that I sent over to you, boss?

I actually was impressed

by how astonishingly
off the mark you were.

You're thinking inside
the box, people.

We need something
that leverages

their cloud technology
to make this planet greener.

- I actually got this.
- Deadline's this weekend.

Shut up! Jesus!

- What's that, gentlemen?
- No. No, no, no.

I'm sorry. Sorry, boss.
Not talking to you.

I was talking to
the receptionist.

He keeps coming in and out
of the conference room.

- I'm very sorry.
- The reception's fine on my end.

Now get to work on this
innovation challenge.

It's not rocket science.
It's data science.

Yeah, of course.

Yeah, I know the difference
between data--

Okay, great.

Hung up. Good job, guys.

Smooth move, Jonathan.

Shut up.

Broadcasting from
the middle of my class,

this is ESKN.

What's up, fam?

I got my hair on point,
know what I'm saying?

This is Eskin Radio...

There's no way that's
Mr. Eskin's real hair.

Do you think he got
plugs or something?

They can turn
the scalp around.

It has to be extensions.

Hey, shh!
I'm trying to podcast.

Okay. Nice hair.

Does anyone here
know how to paste

an Instagram photo
into a document?

Yes, yes! I mean, yes.
I know how. I know how.

I'm Alex, by the way.

I know who you are, Alex.

We've had, like,
10 classes together.

Actually,
13 if you count P.E.

Or is it 12?

Anyway, ballpark figure.
Anyway.

Instagram.
Okay, let's see here.

Whoa! No.

You have 72.4
thousand followers?

Shh, that's my other account.
I'm really into nail art,

so I made
an Instagram about it.

Miley tweeted about it once
and it kinda blew up.

Why do you keep it a secret?

Well, it's not
a secret exactly,

it's just when people find out,
they treat you differently.

It's gross, actually.

But it's a big part
of my life,

so I thought I would put
it in the presentation.

That's so cool.
If I had a fanbase like that...

- There he goes!
- He's doing it.

Oh, uh, embedding.
Yes, of course.

See these three dots
right here?

Okay, so what
we're gonna do

is we're gonna click
those three dots, boom,

and we're gonna copy,
boom, paste, voila!

Whoa, you are really
good at that.

Looks like I'm not the only
one with a hidden talent.

Yeah, I don't like
to brag or anything.

It's just more of like
it's a thing, like I--

- Oh, my God.
- I'm all right. I'm fine.

I'm fine.
I didn't break anything.

I'm good. I'm good.

- Okay.
- Thank you.

Talk to you later.
Okay.

Ellie, Ellie, Ellie,
Ellie, Ellie.

What's going on?

What are you doing
in my office, Jonathan?

I thought I'd just stop by

and see what you've
done with the place.

I really, really like it.

Especially that bookshelf.
That's nice.

That's great.

Can I help you with something?

No, I just--
I wanted to jump in here

and let you know I wouldn't
worry about what Owen said.

Personally, I think you're
doing a bang-up job, so--

What are you
even talking about?

You know, about how
you haven't brought in

any worthwhile companies,
and how you've been

pretty much useless during
the innovation challenge.

You didn't hear him
say any of that?

No, I didn't.

Yeah, like I said,
I wouldn't stress it.

And, honestly,
if all else fails,

I'm sure there will be a
receptionist job opening up soon.

Yeah, that's a window.

I'd put some stickers
on there or something.

It's a little misleading,
and dangerous, honestly.

- Get out.
- Mm-hmm.

Ellie, hey.

Let me get that for you.

- What do you want?
- To congratulate you.

On what? EJ!

- Oh, my God!
- I'm so sorry.

Hang on.
Hang on. I got it.

I'm about
to show you something

that's gonna
change your life.

I don't have time for more
YouTube fail compilations.

I have a meeting
that I have to go to.

No, no, this is serious!

Okay, so...

I saw you talking about
that GE whatchamacallit

challenge about the app,
but it just so happens

that this folder, while
appearing to be your

run of the mill
sopping wet folder,

actually contains several
billion dollar ideas.

And the best part?

I am giving you
the first look.

Oh, come on! This thing has
your name written all over it.

Actually, EJ, my name
is written with two Ls.

You don't even know the
parameters of the challenge.

This is not just any random app.
We need an app--

That leverages GE's
Predix cloud software

to lessen our carbon
footprint while enhancing

everyday life through
insights and solutions

that leverage real-time data.

Yeah, I read the
all-company emails, too.

Granted I had to Google
most of those words,

but I am 90% certain
that there is a unicorn

hiding inside these pages.

You just made the best
decision of your career.

Debatable!

I have to say,
my camera roll

from this past year
was on fleek.

I mean, me and my sister
on stage at Comic-Con?

And our family trip
to Harry Potter World?

- Expelliarmus!
- Hey, were you bummed

when the sorting hat
put you in Hufflepuff?

Okay, how are you guys
not stressed out about this?

What?

We can bang this project
out in our sleep.

I'm not talking about
the technical aspect.

Photos and videos that
communicate who I am?

What am I supposed
to show, this?

Oh, but you love Pow Pow.

Yeah. Or this?

- That's crushing it, though.
- Yeah.

- What about this?
- A-plus.

I am not laughing, okay?

I could humiliate
myself in front of Lo.

Relax, her best
friend is Lamey Jamie.

Hey, hey, Jamie
is not that lamey.

Okay, and as I was saying,

maybe she has a secret
attraction to ninja coders

who rocked braces
for nine years.

- Thanks, Darius.
- Yeah.

Don't worry, there are
people in this school

way more suss than we are.

Yeah, like,
uh, like the math nerds.

How about the foreign
exchange kids?

And the drama geeks.

Okay, okay, I get it,
but you're missing the point.

All of those cliques
have a thing.

They're all unique.

I'm just some kid.

Not everybody's a thing.

Look at Bernie Davis.

Nah, he's on
the basketball team.

Um, Spencer Boyle.

He's super into Jesus.

- Ariel Green.
- Oh, she talks loud.

Hey, Tara!
Save me a seat!

Oh, yeah.

Oh, I've got one.
Cole Winnard.

And then she said,
"Are you just happy to see me

or is that your phone
in your pocket?"

I didn't have my phone!

I mean, he doesn't
have a thing,

and considering the fact
that he's friends with Lo,

I mean, he's doing
pretty good for himself.

Mmm, he throws parties.

See ya!
Have a good trip!

Woo-hoo-hoo.

- Dude, there's your answer.
- What?

Throw your own party.

Aren't your parents out
of town this weekend?

Okay, there's a lot of legal
risks associated with--

Don't ruin this one for us.

Look, the guy who throws
the party gets the girl.

That means we do, too.

Ain't happening.

A, our guild practice
is this weekend.

B, I have no idea
how to throw a party.

Can we forget about
the stupid guild for once?

How dare you speak ill
of the Crusaders of Xenith?

We've played thousands
of hours of Warcraft,

and what do we have
to show for it?

A high ranking
and literally the love

of thousands of Ukrainians.

I'd rather have the love
of a few IRL for once,

and you should, too.

What if nobody shows up

and I'm the laughingstock
of the school?

Dude, are you seriously
considering this?

Yes. Yes.

♪ Doo-dah, doo-dah ♪

♪ Camptown racetrack's
five miles long ♪

♪ Oh the doo-dah day ♪

♪ Gonna to run all night ♪

♪ Gonna to run all day,
I bet my money ♪

Aah!

Are you kidding me right now?
Was that even real?

Please don't sneak up
on me like that.

Ah! Yes.

So I see you have
perused the X-Files.

I have, and most of these
ideas are absolutely terrible.

Hey, hey, look, Ellie.

Facebook wasn't
built in a day.

Actually, it was.

- It was?
- It was.

I mean, come on, EJ.

Look at some of these ideas.

An app that monitors
how much gas you pass

when you eat certain foods
so that you can track

your carbon emissions
and improve your diet?

Yeah, I stand by
Outsmart Your Fart.

Lyft for couch potatoes?

Sometimes the remote gets stuck
on the other side of the room

and you gotta
get somebody to go get it.

I guess there's
really only one in here

that actually kind of works.

Really, there is?

Monitoring your device usage
to save time and energy.

Ah, yes, okay.

So that little gem
came to me when my dad

started yelling at me for spending
all my free time on my cell phone.

And I thought to myself,
what if I could develop an app

that would encourage
you to go offline

but then also
conserve electricity?

So, do you have a prototype
for this earth-shattering idea?

- Yeah.
- Can I see it?

Yeah, it's, um, right--
this guy right here.

No, EJ, I meant a minimum
viable product, okay?

A working version
of the app.

Yes, I totally
have that, too.

The only thing
is that my developer

is working on fixing
some bugs right now

and I can't deliver anything
less than perfection.

Okay.

Thursday morning then,
before the staff meeting.

Thursday, yeah.
Okay, great.

Thursday it is.

Mother...

Sorry, my sister
was hogging the bike.

It's not your fault.

EJ was supposed to pick me up.

Don't worry, I got you.

♪ When I was growing up ♪

♪ I had a lot of dreams ♪

♪ My mama told me, son ♪

♪ You could be anything ♪

♪ Go ahead and spread
your wings ♪

♪ I know one day
you'll be great ♪

♪ Just wait, soon
you'll aim up at the sky ♪

♪ And I'll watch you
float away ♪

♪ I don't want to worry
'bout nothing for a while ♪

♪ I just want to play around,
living like a child ♪

♪ With old tunes
jamming on my Walkman ♪

♪ And some Sour Patch Kids and
a Coke, yeah ♪

Welcome home.

Aah! What is wrong with you?

Were you seriously
just sitting in the dark

waiting for me to
come home, you freak?

Aren't you
forgetting something?

Is it national sibling day?

You were supposed to pick me
up from school, you jerk.

Ah, that explains it.

I wrote down "pick up Alex"
on my hand, but it smudged,

So I thought it said
"pick up a lox."

I bought all this
lox for nothing.

You are literally
too dumb to get mad at.

No, no, no, wait.
Dude, no, don't go.

I need your help
with something, okay?

It's for work, and I promise,
I can't pay you right now,

but shares of my future company
could literally be worth

billions of dollars.

Trillions of dollars,
dude, come on!

- Nope, not helping.
- Please?

I guess it's just
you and me, lox.

I still think this
is a terrible idea,

but if we're gonna do it,
we should do it right.

So, I ran a Twitter search
for the hashtag "sickparty",

then aggregated the results,

and what I noticed were that ping
pong balls were featured a lot.

So we're definitely gonna
want ping pong balls.

- I love ping pong.
- Me as well.

No, no, no, we do not have
time to crunch numbers.

Let's just think about
all the rad parties

we've been to in the past.

Oh, my cousin Allegra had
a piñata at her quinceañera.

Now we're getting somewhere.

Piñatas are a bop.
Do you guys not watch CW?

It's all about foam parties.

Look in that book.
I guarantee you it's somewhere in there.

Look at it.

Oh, that looks unhygienic.

How about glow in the dark?

We whiten our teeth
and we get an advantage

over all of the other guys.

I can't believe
I'm friends with you.

Okay, Stu, search Yelp
for party planners.

I'll put an ad
on Craigslist.

Darius, keep an eye
on Lo's Snapchat.

All right.

Is it on? The camera? Oh!

Hola. Hi, how are
you gringos locos?

So I've seen that
you've posted online

that you need help
for this fiesta, right?

What's up, guys?
It's Barry the beat-boxer.

Heard you need a little
"eh-wuh-eh-wuh"

entertainment
for your party.

And if that is the case,

then you go no other place

than Kudro the Cowboy.

Hello there.
I'm Rickets.

Like crickets,
but without the "K".

I'm a software developer.

I made a game
called Duck Hunter.

Apparently there
was already a game

called Duck Hunter out there.

I was not aware of this.

Although we are not technically
conjoined, we act as though we are.

You can reach me
on my Facebook page,

or I got a SoundCloud
because I'm also a singer.

♪ You were the first ♪

♪ So was I ♪

Hey, it's me!
Reddy the Clown.

Hire me for your party.

Hire me! Please!
I need the work!

I'm just kidding--
but I'm not.

I got lots of
special skills.

I can dance,
I can do balloon animals,

I'm good with kids,
archery, hiking.

I used to be a barista.
I don't know.

I come with all
sorts of fun stuff.

I, Lady Maybelline,
can make your party lit.

- I'll bring yogurt.
- Broken legs.

I even have
this pretty sweet thing.

It's make me cough
when I go too hard.

Anyway, hire me.

Go no place else
than Kudro the Cowboy.

- Call us.
- Call us.

I'm coming.

Hit me up,
Reddy the Clown.

And 200.
Now, you're sure

you can get this
out by Thursday?

Yeah. Don't be
so paranoid, man.

- You're in great hands.
- That's fantastic.

I'm sorry,
I'm just a little nervous

about giving
that much money

to someone I never met
on the internet.

Aah!

Aah!

Why?

Dude, we could ask
Cole Winnard for help.

He's not gonna help us.

That's like Kylo Ren
helping Jar Jar Binks.

That's like Taylor Swift
helping Hannah Montana.

- Whoa.
- Oh.

What happened with you?

Craigslist.

Why do you look
all depressed?

- Craigslist.
- For what, Pokémon cards?

If you must know,
we're throwing a party on Friday night.

You mean,
like a Mario party?

No, no, no,
like a real party.

Cool kids, lit music,
glow in the dark, baby.

L.O.L.! Big-time L.O.L.!

- You guys can't throw a party.
- Watch us.

No, I'm not saying you don't
know how to throw a party,

though you don't know
how to throw a party.

I'm saying that dad will
freak if he finds out

and I'm not putting
my butt on the line.

Dude!

Dude!

Oh, come on,
I'll do anything.

I'll cook dinner
for the next week.

Shh!

Hold on, it's coming.

Wait, wait. Shh!

Yep, I got it.

Light bulb moment!

What are you talking about?

You know that app you
didn't want to hear about?

I need it built, fast.

You guys build me
a prototype,

I'll let you throw
your dumb party.

What's the app?

Basically we use
GE's cloud technology

to monitor
the town's power grid.

When demand surges,
everybody's devices turn off

except for emergency calls
and Taco Bell.

We all conserve energy
and you guys have to go out

and do stuff that doesn't
involve being on your iPads

and Xboxes
and what have you.

Have some decency, man.

Okay, I am not interested in
the peanut gallery right now.

Can you build it or not?

When do you need it by?

Thursday morning.

- Thursday?
- It's doable.

I mean, I'm down,
but we need to set up for the party.

Don't worry about that.
I got a guy.

- A guy?
- A guy.

Get in here.

We need to spit up
the server,

then write the JavaScript,

then Darius and Stu can
handle it from there.

Okay, so what does that mean?

We accept your offer.

Woo! Come here.

You know what? No, forget it.
Just get in the car.

- Get in the car.
- See you, guys.

- See you, Alex.
- Come on, let's go.

- Later, nerds.
- Bye, EJ.

- Is it good yet?
- What?

The app, is it good?

It's literally
been three minutes.

- Are you?
- Nine.

Come sit with me.

Over there.

You go first.

Okay.

So you're EJ's
little brother.

Yeah.

You wouldn't lie to me,
would you?

- No, sir.
- You wouldn't lie to me?

I would not.

So why don't you
look like that?

Okay, the timer
is locked and loaded,

the CSS looks sharp,
and the AJAX is all set.

How's the firewall tracking?

Oh, it's all the way live.

Mother, I don't want
to practice the piano!

Is someone at the door?

You want to do something
different, you know?

Something they're
gonna remember forever.

Everybody's tweeting.
Nobody's doing this.

Oh, my gosh,
that's insane!

What is your problem?
I just want people

from my high school
to show up,

not random strangers.

You're in high school?

Huh.

I mean, I guess
it's pretty cool.

- How'd you do it?
- I know a guy.

So, the GE cloud notifies us

when the town
is using too much energy,

and then every device
gets a two-minute warning.

Then for three hours,
we're all stuck in real life.

- Huh.
- Not bad, huh?

I have no idea what
you're talking about.

Oh, my God.

We'll text you
the Cliff Notes.

It's right here. How?

It's EJ, bro.

Weather forecasts,
grid maintenance,

scheduling and outages,
all processed in real-time

through Predix, to our users

because life is much better
lived than watched.

Nice.

That's it.

You may applaud now.

Calm down.

Do you have
a technical cofounder?

Yes. Yes, we do.
It's this buddy of mine.

He dropped out of Stanford,
total rock star.

This guy's still at Google

but he wants to come on
full-time once we raise money.

- Money.
- Enough.

And what do you call it?

- Excuse me?
- The app, genius.

- What's the name of the app?
- Right. Yes, okay.

We're calling it
the Cloud Maximizer 2.0.

Cloud Maximus 2.0.

That's not even
what he said. Shut up.

These things take time.

Based on what
I'm hearing so far--

Where's the market value fit?

I mean, how many kids are
voluntarily gonna use this?

That's a fair point,
Jonathan.

- Well, we haven't really.
- Right, you know what?

Owen, you are asking
all the right questions.

Is it okay
if I call you Owen?

- Sure.
- Fantastic.

It just so happens that
actually we're throwing

the world's first
unplugged party

where all devices
will be voluntarily

powered down for three hours.

Genius. That's genius.

Some people are
already calling it

the party of the decade.

You wanna swing by?

Witness history
in the making?

There will be live music.

- Kids love live music.
- Do they?

Well, this is the closet thing
I've seen to a good idea

and GE's deadline
is this weekend,

so you got your shot.

Jonathan and I
are having dinner

with a journalist
from Tech Crunch.

Why don't
you and Ellie join,

and then we'll
head over together?

I'm sorry to interrupt, sir,

but what about that
vegan delivery concept

that we had been
talking about?

I've seen 12 competitors
already this week.

Owen, it is brilliant decisions
like this

- that demonstrate why--
- You may leave now.

Yep. 'Kay, on my way.

Good? Right, guys?

Cloud Maximizer 2.0.

Shut up.

That sounds lit.
An underground disaster party?

This could do irreparable
damage to our social status.

You do irreparable damage
to our social status everyday.

Oh, hi. Hey.
Hello, Lo, Jamie.

- Hey.
- How are you guys doing?

I have to get to calculus.

Hey, so do we.
You wanna come with?

Um, sure.

Uh, were you eating lunch?

No, I just like to carry
around an empty tray.

I'm actually an alien
who doesn't eat,

but don't tell anyone.

Stupid question.

How's the project
coming along?

I don't know.
It's kind of hard

to sum myself up
in one presentation.

Kind of stressing out
about it actually.

Same. Yeah.
I mean, kind of, but--

I'm having a house party
tomorrow night,

- if you want to join.
- Really?

Didn't take you
for the house party

throwing type of guy.

Well, the parents
are out of town,

so I thought it'd be cool
to betray their trust.

Can I bring Jamie?

Yeah, absolutely.

You know, friends,
acquaintances,

mortal enemies.
Come one, come all.

I've been looking
to smooth things over

with my enemies,
so perfect timing.

Awesome, yeah.
It's the time.

Okay,
I'll see you tomorrow.

Yes, wouldn't miss
it for the world.

- Okay.
- Ow!

Oh, my God.

I think that man just
hit me with a muffin.

It's not a man.
It's my brother.

I'm sorry.
Let me go talk to him.

Are you trying to
ruin my life?

There's my favorite
and only brother.

Don't you wanna know
how the meeting went?

Don't you wanna know how
the party planning is going?

Actually, yeah,
that's why I'm here.

Well, we've done nothing.

Nine is useless.

All he's done is send me
text messages of gifs.

Well, in his defense,
Nine is a gif god.

The party
is tomorrow night!

Chill, chill.
That's where I come in.

What are you gonna do?

Well, what if there
was a secret password

and only people who know it
will be admitted?

So like unlocking a hidden level
or something?

Precisely.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But stay with me though.

What if instead
of a password,

it's actually an app?

And if you don't download it,
you can't get in.

- Wow!
- Shut up, shut up.

I thought you actually
cared about my party.

I do.

No, it's all about
your stupid app.

Hey, mi app es su app, bro.

My new company,
your big party,

they are flip sides
of the same coin.

Let me show you how
a CEO gets things done.

Come on.

You want a great party?

You can't just invite
the people

you think should be there.

If you want
an instant classic,

it's all about the people
who shouldn't be there.

Start with a clique that
never gets invited to parties.

I used to be
in the drama club.

Perfect.

While you guys all reminisce

about that
8th grade production

of "Annie Get Your Gun",
casually drop that

you got invited to a party
tomorrow at Alex Finn's.

Got invited to a party
tomorrow at Alex Finn's.

Wasn't it Leibniz
who said music

is a hidden exercise
in arithmetic?

I am on the calculus team.

And as everyone knows,
there's only one word

that's exactly the same
in every single language.

Fiesta? Partido? Fete?

And from there,
my young Padawan learners,

the word is out
and the party is on.

Nobody knows who's hosting,
and nobody cares.

But come tomorrow night,
everybody's gonna be there.

Alex Finn's having a party?

You really think
that'll work?

It already has.

♪ From the spires
in the sky ♪

♪ Down to the corridors
beneath ♪

♪ There's an energy
that vibes ♪

♪ In the faces
that you meet ♪

♪ Golden face
that divides us ♪

♪ Is calling and making me ♪

♪ We're on fire ♪

♪ Burn the ashes
when it's over ♪

♪ We're on fire ♪

♪ The voices getting
closer, closer ♪

♪ We're on ♪

♪ We're on fire ♪

♪ We're on ♪

♪ We're on fire ♪

♪ Burn the ashes
when it's over ♪

♪ We're on fire ♪

♪ The voices getting
closer, closer ♪

Alexander Finn!

Did you want to
speak with me?

What's up, dude?

- Nothing much.
- 'Sup, dawg.

Boom.

'Sup, dawg?
How you living?

- Just busy.
- Oh, really? Busy?

Heard you might
be real busy.

- Planning something.
- I mean, um...

I know about your little
soiree tomorrow night.

I didn't mean for it
to get this big.

I invited a couple
friends here and there,

and all of a sudden everyone
just wanted to come.

I don't want to hear it!

Look, dude, I get it.

I was a kid once, too, dude, all
right?

So I'm gonna be straight
with you, Alexander.

I'm not gonna bust
your party, dude.

Really? You're not?

Dude! Come on! Who am I?

Remember who
you're talking to.

Yeah, man, I'm not whack.

I'm lit.
I got a mixtape man.

It's fire.

But look, I do need to
ask you a question.

Okay.

And I need you to be
100% straight with me.

Okay, all right.

Is it cool if roll through?

Uh, sure.

That's, that's cool.

Sick, dude!

Whoo! Yeah!

I needed this.
Thanks, bro.

Awesome.
So I'll just come by.

What time's the party?

- 8:30.
- 8:30.

Okay, on the late side.

You can come whenever,
though. It's not--

Seven o'clock?
Help you set up?

Yes. Am I dismissed now?

- Yeah, fam. Fo' sho.
- Okay.

Fo' sho! See you at
the party tonight, playa!

Rock on, fam.

Hey, boys, it's your dad.

How's it going over
there on the home front?

I haven't gotten any
calls from the police,

so that's a good sign.

Anyway, I hope Mr. Delaney

isn't giving you
too hard of a time.

Oh, remember to set
the A/C to away mode

if you're both
leaving the house.

And no ordering any on-demand
movies unless you pay for them

Too much camo?

So, uh, what else?

Yeah, um, we're about to hit
the hay.

Love you both.
Good night.

Alex?

Lo?

The party doesn't start
for four hours.

What are you doing
here so early?

I just wanted
to give you a kiss.

Oh, Lo.

I love you.

Shh.

That is way too loud.

No.

Aah!

Hi, Lo. It's me, Alex.

Hey, no.

Hey, what do
you guys think?

- Oh, Alex.
- A-sharp.

- On fire.
- I'm digging it.

Now aren't that cute?

What up with the headphones?

Makes it look
like I don't care.

Look, I'm not
even plugged in.

Nah, lose 'em.

All right,
party's about ready.

Nine, you're working
security, man.

Keep everybody out
of the front yard.

Make sure
that nobody gets in

unless they've
downloaded the app

and their data's disabled.

No disabled people, got it.

That's not what I said.

Stu, you're handling
bugs and glitches.

If I'm not too busy
finessing the ladies.

I am not joking, Stuart!
This is serious!

Darius.

You're monitoring
the back end, buddy.

I have been training for
this moment my entire life.

Good man.

- Alex.
- Yes.

Try to keep in mind that this
is not just a house party.

This is the most important
night of my-- of our careers.

I know.

Make sure you don't burn
the house to the ground.

Try to have
a little fun, too.

- All right?
- All right.

I'll be monitoring everything
from the Milton cam.

Uh, guys? I think we might have a
minor, minor issue.

Dude, I don't have time for issues.
What is this?

Look what happens when I
click on a user's profile.

- Oh, my goodness gracious.
- Yeah.

I'm kidding. I have no idea
what you're trying to show me.

Are you seeing
what I'm seeing?

We have full access
to people's phones.

I mean, what happened to
the privacy firewall, Stu?

Did I forget to plug it in?

Uh, all right, look,
all I know is that this is

super secure cloud software

and if you guys figured out
a way to muck it up--

Okay, Stu screwed up,
but it's an easy fix,

and we're gonna
get on it ASAP.

All right.
I'm gonna be late.

You twerps got this?

Just go. I'll patch
the security network.

It'll take 15 minutes.

Now we're talking,
Patch Adams.

I will see you guys
at around nine.

You will text me if there
are any other problems, okay?

EJ, it's Ellie.

We're running late.

Jonathan insisted on
telling the driver

how to get to the
hotel and got lost,

and then of course blamed me

for giving him
the wrong address.

Anyways, can we please
just impress the pants off

this writer and Owen tonight

so I can prove
Jonathan wrong?

I mean, let's kill it.
You're gonna kill it.

We have a great idea.

So meet us at the bar,

and maybe go over
your pitch again,

and again, and then, like,
maybe one more time.

And please don't say
anything weird tonight, okay?

Oh, and don't order
anything too strong

before we get there.

I need you focused.

Oh! Oh, scrumptious.

Oh, that's fire.

Yo, before y'all
finish that patch,

let me hit a lick and
just get like five minutes

to peruse a few girls' albums.

You are such a creep.

You're telling me you got full
access to Lo's entire phone

and you're not gonna
do anything with it?

That sounds a little
irresponsible to me, Alex.

I couldn't do that to her.

Ten toes down, I can.

- He doesn't want to.
- Come on.

Ooh, looks like
she's into astrology.

Looks like we got a Virgo
on our hands, fellas!

- Resist the temptation.
- But I'm a Virgo, too.

Based on her "recently
watched" on Netflix,

we got "Rick & Morty",
"Archer",

"Parks and Rec",
and "Workaholics"!

She likes all
the same shows I do!

Yes.

Yes!

People are here.

- I gotta finish this.
- Right here.

Look, it's right here.

Do you mind
if you guys stall?

I just want to
take a quick peek at,

you know, Lo's phone.

Yes.

Here's to the best night
of our lives, players.

Let's ball out.
Come on, Darius.

For the record,
I think this is a terrible idea.

'Sup?

Just-- it's fine.

Chilling.
How are you? Cool.

Come on.

- ...shiatsu message?
- Yes.

- There he is!
- Ah, this guy.

- You still rich?
- Duh.

- You are gonna love him.
- Oh, thanks. I'm excited.

Isn't that the next
Mark Zuckerberg

standing on the furniture
like an oversized child?

He's weird.

I like weird!

Guys, I can't believe
we actually did this.

I know, this party
is amazeballs!

Group effort, players.

There's nothing we can't do
when we put our minds to it.

- What is this?
- I know.

This party's pretty lit, huh?

No.

Do you want me to tell the
people out front to leave?

Who?

We're gonna need
a bigger house.

Our business is like a shark.

If we're not moving
forward, we die.

Which is why I'm always
looking for the next big thing.

- Carrot!
- EJ?

Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Absolutely. Synergy.

- Innovation.
- Ideation.

- Okay.
- Intubation. Right?

Listen, Owen already leaked your
app concept to me,

and I'm a bit skeptical.

I mean, every kid I know
is glued to their phones.

How are you gonna make
them turn them off?

Look, I was part
of the last generation

to grow up without
the Internet.

We had to have fun
the old-fashioned way.

Cow tipping, prank calls--

we didn't need tweets
and listicles to let loose.

Still not sure I'm following.

You know what?
Everybody close your eyes for a second.

Just close your eyes.
Stay with me here.

Jon, close your eyes.

Jonathan,
close your eyes.

- Close your eyes.
- Close your eyes.

All right, all right.

Now, wait.
Wait for it.

Okay, open your eyes.

You're still here.

Ha, ha, ha. Yeah.
You smell that?

- Um...
- Mushrooms?

- They're right here.
- No, no!

That's not what it is.
You know what it is?

It's a whiff of the future.

Look, it's not just
about shutting down.

It's about savoring
what comes next.

I'm getting excited.

And when I get excited, I get
hungry.

- Cucumber, now.
- Is a half one okay?

- Do you want more?
- No.

Stu?

Stu?

Can you two get a room?

Just not my room though.

Stu?

I will free you from
the shackles of your job.

I feel so unburdened.

- Stu?
- Hey, there you are.

He told me you'd find us.

Alejandro.
Ale, Alejandro.

Ale, Alejandro, eh?

Live and dance.
Lose yourself in wild romance.

Fiesta, caramba.

- Forever!
- Forever!

Alejandro, I have traveled

long and wide to meet up
with you esta noche.

Tonight, your man EJ,

he will confront
his own destiny.

Without him, you will face
obstacles of your own

in order to realize
your dream.

So it's time for you
to put aside the chico,

to put aside the baby,

to put aside the niño.

and become the macho
you're meant to be!

Fiesta musica!
Party loco!

Alexander Finn.

Yes, that's it.
You hit the nail on the head, Owen.

In a world dominated
by virtual reality,

who needs a self-driving car?

I hate to interrupt,
but I still don't get

why kids are gonna willingly
turn off their phones.

That's where
the parents come in.

Yes. See, that
is exactly right.

You are living in a
Web 2.0 world, my friend.

The next era
is all about focus,

efficiency,
undivided attention.

You know what?
I should take this.

Just one second.
So sorry. Just one second.

You've gotta be
kidding me.

There's something
about this kid.

Sorry to interrupt, bro,

but Alex don't got any sad,

old 70-year-old, divorced,

bald-looking
white friends, do he?

I don't know.
I mean, he met up with some old guys

at a World of Warcraft
meetup last year.

Does one of them
live next door?

Nine!

That is a code 374!

Repeat, 374!

I'm sorry, 37 what?

Nine, stop whatever it is
that you are doing,

and go find Alex ASAP, okay?

It's so crowded,
I can't find Lo anywhere.

She's always with Jamie.

How am I supposed
to fulfill my destiny?

I'll run a diversion
on Lamey Jamie,

you just go in for the kill.

- Stu, you're just--
- I know, I know.

I'm no hero.

Anyone in my position
would do the same.

No, no.
What I was gonna say is

you're a little
out of your league.

Oh? We're about to find out.

They're right over there.

- Go get 'em.
- All right, let's go.

Wanna go outside
and get a little air?

You can go.
I'm just gonna hang here.

Whatever.

Hey, you having
a good time?

Other than the secondhand
anxiety I'm experiencing

watching people trash
your house, totally.

We've been throwing bangers
like this for a minute.

Awesome.

Here, come on.
I'll tell you all about it.

Great.

I could never have
a party at my house.

I would just be following
people around with cupholders.

You sound like a Virgo.

I am. That's so random.

Are you into astrology?

Yeah, I dabble.

That's so funny,
I've never met a guy

who was into
that sort of thing.

It's usually
such a girl thing.

Oh, yeah, actually,
I don't know.

I was kidding about that.

Forget I ever said that.

Not much for
big crowds, are we?

Nope.

You wanna go
somewhere quieter?

Fine.
This party is lame.

Sick! Hey!

Yo, we're going upstairs.

- Oh.
- Yeah!

Let's go.

So, what TV shows
do you like?

I'm a big fan
of "Parks and Rec",

"Ricky and Morny",

"Workaholics", and "Archer".

Wow!

You and my little brother
would really hit it off.

Those are literally
his favorite shows.

Uh, your brother?

I was kidding about that.

I kinda watch those shows,

but I don't really
watch those shows.

I watch those
shows sometimes.

Is everything okay?

Yes. I gotta go.

- Aww, hell no.
- Crap.

Yo, Alex, we gotta end
the party right now.

That dude busted us
back in '08.

His own children
don't even like him.

Oh, no.

We gotta end
the party now, man.

Stop playing.
Tell everybody to go home.

Hey, I got an idea.

What's up, homies?

Can I get through here
real quick?

Hey, everyone! Everyone!

Yeah!

If you don't want
this party to end--

Yeah! Let's never leave!

Yeah, so give me two
minutes of silence.

I will destroy
everything you hold dear!

I need you guys to be quiet.

I don't want to hear
a peep from you.

Shh! Shh!

I'll be right back.
It's fine. Shh!

Guys...

Oh, hey, Mr. Delaney.
Is everything okay?

No, everything
is not okay.

You and your brother
are creating a racket

like I have never heard.

Now how, how--

how many hooligans
do you have in there?

I'm sorry you're not
able to sleep,

but my parents are already
back from their trip.

Let me talk to your father.

Of course, yes.
Let me go get him.

Hey,
how's it going over there?

Is that you, Arthur?

Hey, how's it going
over there, Mr. Delaney?

I didn't realize you and
the missus are back already.

Yeah.

Do the boys have
some people over?

Because I've been
hearing this noise.

No, we're about to
hit the hay.

Are you sure?

No, we're about to
hit the hay.

- He already said that one.
- I know!

- Change it up!
- I'm trying. Shut up!

I can only keep this
going for so long.

- Well, keep doing it.
- Okey-dokey.

Good night. Love you.

All I had was "I love you."

He didn't record
anything else.

He thinks we love him now.

Good night, Mr. Delaney.

♪ Dance when the bass hit,
dab on a spaceship ♪

♪ Me and all my
homies going hard ♪

♪ I'm hella high, brah,
I cannot lie, brah ♪

♪ I've got that mad
look in my eye, brah ♪

♪ Pull up in their skirts,
got your main thing ♪

♪ Looking at us like,
"What's up?" ♪

♪ Spinning all
these bad soldiers ♪

♪ Girls,
they showing love ♪

♪ How can I be down?
Every day I'm calling up ♪

♪ 1, 2, 3, 4 shots,
we don't give a --- ♪

♪ Just left Miami ♪

♪ I'm going back to Cali ♪

♪ In the club
with my family ♪

♪ Going hard
with my family ♪

♪ I don't need a lot,
just a few... ♪

Nine, Nine, Nine, Nine!
Nine, Nine, Nine!

♪ Party to the late night,
yes, we --- do ♪

♪ Do we need another round?
Yes, we fucking do ♪

♪ Yes, we --- do ♪

Why did I do that?

♪ I'm higher
than my penthouse ♪

♪ With the city view ♪

♪ Party to the late night?
yes, we --- do ♪

♪ Do we need another round?
yes, we -- ♪

♪ Dance when the bass hit,
dab on a spaceship ♪

♪ Me and all my
homies going hard ♪

♪ I'm hella high, brah,
I cannot lie, brah ♪

♪ I've got that ---
look in my eye, brah ♪

♪ Pull up in their skirts,
got your main thing ♪

♪ Looking at us like,
"What's up?" ♪

♪ Spinning all
these bad soldiers ♪

♪ Girls,
they showing love ♪

♪ How can I be down? ♪

♪ We don't give a --- ♪

♪ We don't give a --- ♪

♪ I don't need a lot,
just a -- few ♪

♪ A few loyal real Gs,
that's my --- crew ♪

♪ Party to the late night,
yes, I do ♪

♪ Do we need another round?
Yes, we do ♪

♪ Dance when the bass hit,
dab on a spaceship ♪

♪ Me and all my
homies going apeshit ♪

♪ I'm hella high, brah,
I cannot lie, brah ♪

♪ I've got that
look in my eye ♪

♪ Every day I'm calling up ♪

♪ 1, 2, 3, 4 shots,
we don't give a --- ♪

Hey, whoa, whoa!

Don't you think we're
moving a little too fast?

Stop being a wuss
and just kiss me.

No, no! I have something
I have to tell you.

You don't want to kiss me?

No, no, I do.
I really do.

But, no, no, no!
I never kissed anyone before.

You what?

I mean, I know
it's shocking, but--

I've kissed my mom,
obviously,

but not a girl, like,
from school on the lips.

Oh, you're so
adorably pathetic.

That's okay,
we don't have to do

anything
you don't want to do.

I'm sure Alex and Lo
have kissed by now.

- Wait, what?
- Well, Lo was complaining

about how she wanted
to kiss Alex,

but you two are always
attached at the hip.

So I had to run
a diversion.

No, no.
I was distracting you.

Whatever you want to tell
yourself, loverboy.

Oh, hey!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!

I'm gonna ride you
like your skateboard!

Well that went amazing,
am I right?

You're right. It did go great.
There he is.

What's the address
of this party?

- I've got a Lyft on the way.
- 1538 Sycamore.

So, tiny little disclaimer,
before we go,

the party that
we're going to might

or might not be
a high school house party.

I'm sorry,
is it or is it not

a high school
house party?

It is.

Of course it is.
I never thought of it being anything but.

Look, teenagers are the ones
dictating the trends anyway,

so why not test it out
on them, am I right?

Now that's what I call
a killer instinct, huh?

No, it's great.
It's a brilliant idea,

a bunch of unsupervised
high school kids partying.

Yeah, it is, grandpa.
We're gonna have a good time, so let's go.

You know what?
I'm gonna go to the bathroom real quick.

I'll just meet you outside.
One second.

Yo, this party is totally
lame, am I right?

Wait, what?

This party,
it's lame as hell.

Why would you have a party
if you can't Snapchat it?

My parties,
on the other hand, are lit!

My bad, dude.
Who are you?

It's me, Mike,
you know who I am.

It's Cole.
You know, Cole Winnard?

You come to my parties
every weekend.

I took your sister to prom.

Right on, man.
I'm gonna jet over here.

I'll see you
a little later.

Yeah, you will.

Yes, I'd like to report

an out of control party
next door.

Yes, definitely underage
drinking, possible drugs.

Yeah, just send someone
over if you can.

Thank you so much.

Chill, chill, chill.
Yo, yo, yo.

So I had a wild time
unplugging with you guys,

but as of right now,
all your phones are back on.

I can't believe it's been
three hours already.

Time flies when
you're having fun.

Hey, let's turn off
our phones

and keep the no phone
party vibes alive!

Pull out your phones
and power down!

Before we power down,
do you want to take a selfie?

Definitely.

♪ All night ♪

♪ I think about you, baby
I think about you, baby ♪

♪ All night ♪

♪ I think about you, baby,
I think about you, baby ♪

- ♪ All night ♪
- Oh, my God.

Oh, my gosh,
are you kidding me?

Lady, back off.

I'm sorry about that.

It's fine, seriously.

Do you want me to lend you
a shirt or something?

That might not be a bad idea.

Yo, yo, yo, Alex Finn!

If you in
the house right now,

Darius needs to
see you right now.

Not again. Okay,
meet me in my room.

I'll be right there in a sec.

Good luck.

God, you're so sexy.

You got this.
You can have Lo,

I can have every girl I want.
Does Alex have these?

What's up, girl?
How are you doing?

Hey, I'm Cole,
but you already know me.

Okay, I'm trying to
have a good time at my party

But you, Captain Buzzkill,
comes in here and ruined it.

You asked for my help.

I'm just trying to be
a good friend to you,

but you don't even care
if I'm having fun!

Do you think I want to
spend the entire party

monitoring the app?

As a matter of fact,
yes, I do!

If you're glued
to your phone,

you don't have to
actually talk to people.

Are you hearing this, Stu?

Stu, what's wrong with you?

Nothing,
for I have blossomed.

You guys have been cool

for literally,
what, 15 minutes,

and you're already acting
like complete jerks?

Don't forget,
if it wasn't for

the stupid app
and the privacy bug,

you wouldn't have
even been able

to snoop through
Lo's phone or talk to her.

Sorry, I was--

- Hey, thought you were--
- Alex?

We were doing this
as a favor to you and EJ.

We don't even care
about the app.

And some help you've been.

The party was nonexistent
until EJ got involved.

The security bug was
caused by you idiots.

Some guys
are just desperate.

I'm sorry you had
to find out like this.

I know, it's just I thought
he was one of the good guys.

Those are the ones you have
to watch out for the most.

- What are you doing?
- I just thought--

You thought me in tears
was a good time to kiss me?

Maybe?

Do you want me
to walk you home?

That's the last time
we ever do you a favor.

That cinnamon
really messed me up.

If you guys really want to do me a
favor, you'll leave me alone.

Thanks for having
my back, dude.

Stu!

Hey, did you find a T-shirt?

Oh, my gosh,
this is interesting.

Holy guacamole.

I didn't know you
were like this.

All right,
come on in, guys.

Here we go.
Hey, how's the party?

Okay, I guess some people
just aren't ready to unplug.

Mi casa es tu casa,
bienvenidos.

Yeah!

This fiesta is gonna be
mucho caliente!

Go crazy loco.

You know,
we could have a fun time

if you'd just lighten up.

- Lighten up? Really?
- Woo!

This party is insane!

Woo, woo, woo!

Oh, my God.

Is that a full-grown man?

You've never been this
good of a kisser before, Vin.

- You're not Lo.
- You're not Vinny.

I'm Vinny.

And I'm scared.

Yeah! Now, as you can see,

nobody here is so
much as texting.

Told ya.

Cops!

- Aww, come on!
- Hey!

Policia!

Oh, my God,
I'm gonna be fired.

Don't touch me.

It's okay. It's okay.

Everybody, just chill out.

Watch it!

- You! Creepy guy.
- Me?

No, you. Come here.

Nope, no, no.
Get back here.

No. Don't you
make me tase you!

- Okay, okay, okay.
- What happened?

Don't tase me, bro!
Don't tase me, bro!

I was the first
money at Facebook!

Aah!

This is a huge mistake.

Owen?

Owen, are you mad?

Owen, please don't be mad.

I'm sorry, Owen.

Officer,
you don't understand.

We work for
a venture capital fund

and we were just
throwing an event.

Lady, look,
I don't understand fancy words

like "venture capital"
and "event".

All I know is you got a house
full of out of control kids,

and these two bozos sitting
there watching the action.

They're coming with us.

Owen, I'll call
the attorney, okay?

♪ I can't imagine ♪

♪ Life on earth now ♪

♪ I can't imagine ♪

♪ Life on earth now ♪

♪ I can't imagine ♪

♪ Life on earth now ♪

♪ I just want to know ♪

♪ Is my bedroom
still there? ♪

♪ Is it still
standing there? ♪

♪ Is the tree ♪

♪ That I planted
still there ♪

♪ In the backyard? ♪

♪ I want to know ♪

♪ Are things still burning? ♪

♪ Still burning ♪

♪ I want to know ♪

♪ Are things still burning? ♪

♪ Still burning down ♪

♪ Burning down ♪

♪ Burning down ♪

♪ Burning down ♪

♪ Down, down ♪

♪ I can picture my mother ♪

♪ Killing black widows ♪

♪ With an old broom ♪

♪ I'm making all
the neighbors laugh ♪

♪ I was laying
in the blossoms ♪

♪ When the sky went black ♪

♪ I want to know ♪

♪ Are things still burning? ♪

♪ Still burning down ♪

Oh, you're back.

Jail was great.
Thanks for asking.

Where are the dweebs?

They're not talking
to me right now.

I take it things
didn't go so well with--

Lo. Yeah, no.

All right, well,

at least we got
each other, right?

That's got to count
for something.

Yeah.

Besides,
we'll win 'em back.

No.

All right, look, I
know you idolize me,

so I'm gonna go ahead
and drop a truth bomb here.

Remember when we were little,

and mom would buy us
those nutty bars,

and they would be
completely gone

after like a day?

And I would accuse you
of taking them,

and dad would accuse me
of taking them,

and we never quite figured out
what was going on?

Yeah.

Yeah, well I was hiding them
in the laundry closet.

I knew it.

Well, what does that have
to do with anything though?

Seriously?

Who did you invite
to this party?

That's just gross.

All right, look.

In the same way that
I didn't let anything

get between me
and those nutty bars,

you can't let anything
get in between you

and something you want.

Oh, so you're saying
I should lock Lo

in a secret compartment.

Yes! Maybe.
That could be illegal.

You know how many
app installs we got?

Oh, I don't know actually.

Let me check.

- Did you miss us?
- You did get taller, didn't you?

- Arthur? Arthur!
- Yeah, hi, Bernie.

Didn't I just talk
to you on Friday?

Uh, I don't think so.

No, no, I did.
I definitely did.

You were in the window,
and I said--

Yeah, that's great,
Bernie. That's great.

We'll talk to you later.

We're gonna be there
ourselves pretty soon.

You know what?

I think he is finally
really starting to lose it.

Wait. Smell that?

- That's the--
- I can explain.

You can't take the smell
out of a man's home.

- It's in the walls.
- That's right.

I am so happy to be home.

Who wants Chinese food
for dinner?

That sounds so great!

Hey, kids,
Monday morning here

on ESKN, Eskin Radio.

Welcome back to reality.

Did your brains turn to mush?
'Cause it's Monday, baby.

Hey, heard things got a little out
of hand this weekend at Alex Finn's.

We're hearing some disturbing
reports of phone hacking?

Not cool, Alex. Not cool.

- Hey!
- Oh, EJ!

You don't know when
to concede, do you?

I don't even know
what that word means.

- Seriously.
- It's over.

We already submitted a different
app for the innovation challenge.

Yeah, I figured,
but, look,

forget about the challenge
for a second, okay?

We accomplished
something awesome.

Spalding would be stupid
not to invest in us.

This is not just my thing.
This is our thing.

We did this together.

I just need you to
get me into the room.

I'll take care
of the rest.

Okay, peep this, guys.

Tomorrow are your "Multimedia
Me" presentations.

If you have not started yet,
I strongly urge you

to control, alt, delete
all recreational activities.

♪ ..body you can trust me with
your body ♪

♪ I'm not a doctor but
I got that prescription ♪

♪ Im not a builder but
I fixed your broken bridges ♪

♪ Trust me with your body you
can trust me with your body ♪

♪ Maybe you can find someone who's
not just tryin to hit and run ♪

And as they say in St. Tropez

where, if you look
on the screen,

I've been there--

Si este la vie.

Which in French means...

No.

...I live a crazy
awesome life.

Thank you everybody
for coming out.

Winnard out.

Thank you, Cole, for
your enlightening speech.

Definitely follow him
on Instagram.

He's got a number
of pictures

of making
duck faces on there,

so you're gonna want
to check those out.

Next up, Alexander Finn!

Alexander Finn.

I actually spent an
embarrassing amount of time

stressing about
this project.

I was so obsessed with
creating a character

that you guys would
think is cool.

But, in doing so,
I realized I'm not cool.

This is the headgear
I wear for my teeth.

I'm supposed to wear it every
night, but I'm a bad boy,

so I wear it
every other night.

I don't really
have any talents

that will get me
into college,

but I am pretty bomb
at World of Warcraft.

I don't go to cool parties
or go to exotic places,

but I like my life because of the
people I get to spend it with.

I might not always feel
special or like I have a thing,

but that's okay, because
as long as I'm myself

and I treat others the way
I want to be treated,

I know that people will
always want to be my friend.

I guess what
I'm trying to say is...

Well, I just hung up
on Mark Cuban,

so this better be
going somewhere.

...when I stopped obsessing

over what everyone
else was doing,

I realized
how great I had it.

All it took was
getting off my phone

and living in real life.

And I needed some help
to learn that.

Is this serious?

I have a lunch with Dan
Rather in 45 minutes.

What?

Thank you, Alex.

oh, c'mon, what is that?

Life doesn't happen here.

I'll try that that again.

It happens here.

Here.
And, yes, even here.

We set out to leverage

the best data science
on the planet

to make for a more
sustainable environment.

And while there
were a few missteps,

- the fact remains...
- Hey, I look good.

The technology
that we created

not only met
our expectations,

it exceeded them.

- I just--
- Shh.

8,356-- the amount of
kilowatt hours we saved

by having everyone on
their devices power down.

Trust me, these are
exaggerated numbers.

Not now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

4,234-- kilograms
of CO2 we stopped

from poisoning
the atmosphere.

517-- the number
of hours people

weren't on
their devices.

But wait, there's more.

10,000-- the number of times
the app has been downloaded

only by word of mouth.

Why choose between
saving humanity

and saving the environment,

when we can do both?

- Yeah.
- Yes, that was lit!

- Thank you.
- This could be big.

Yeah.

Yeah,
the three of us back together,

just like old times.

Just like "Entourage."

Thank you very much.
Where were we?

Hey, guys.
How are you feeling?

Great, great.
Owen, pleasure.

Uh, excuse me,
do I know you?

So, are you in charge
of this venture?

Yes, sir, I'm the CEO.

Got a good team?

Meet our head of marketing.

He organized the house party.

- Lovely.
- What about a CTO?

Meet Mr. Eskin.

He teaches multimedia
to high school students,

so he's basically a genius.

What's up, dude?

Do you see
what you're doing?

You're not really
going to invest

in these half-witted
losers, are you?

Look at them!

I've been in
this game a long time,

and I think I know a good business
opportunity when I see one.

You have lost your mind.
You've lost your mind!

What your problem is is that you let
your ego get in the way of business.

So guess what? You're on time out.
Go sit down.

- No, no.
- Yes, go sit down!

I will not, because you're come
over there and you're gonna fire me.

And you know what?
You can't fire me, because I quit.

I quit.
Don't say anything.

I quit, I'm done.
I hate this job!

I never liked
that guy anyway.

Looks like we have a pretty big
opening at Spalding Capital.

How do you feel about
that big promotion?

I would love
to take it, sir.

As for you three...
you're funded.

Yeah! Yeah!

We're committed to
a half million dollars

on a pre-money valuation
of two million.

- Don't let me down, boys.
- Nope. Can I?

- Yep, bring it in.
- Thank you.

Not you. Not you.
I don't like you.

Okay.

Well, I guess that means
you're not my boss anymore.

Actually, we now own
20% of the company,

so get back to work.

I don't recall giving you
permission to use our image.

Yeah, I reckon we got
a lawsuit on our hands.

Okay, let's settle
out of court.

I'll offer up my friendship

and unlimited snacks
at my house.

And a video game
to be named later?

Deal.

So are we millionaires now?

Well, if you
value the company

at about, what,
a billion dollars?

What's up, nerds?

That was interesting.

Interesting as
in you'll forgive me

for being a complete jerk?

Interesting as in I'm glad
I have the opportunity

to get to know
the real you.

Selfie time.

Let's just live
in the moment.

Nah!

Yo, get it right here.
There you are.

Right there, right there.

- Duck face?
- Duck face.

Hey!

♪ We're on fire ♪

♪ Burn the ashes
when it's over ♪

♪ We're on fire ♪

♪ The voices getting closer ♪